#mmmm yes..... my ego is being cultivated and nourished.... yes....

[nomazee]

the blade fic 🔫🔫 empty out your pockets and give me any additional thoughts or comments u have >:3c

OH GAWSH HI GWEN,,, you make me blush how did you know i have 1,000,001 thoughts abt every fic i write,,, you ask and i must deliver

the blade fic was so full of projecting but also im just so addicted to portrayals of social anxiety and feeling alienated/out of place in a group of people that are supposed to be your peers,,, i think thats something people experience at ANY age from like elementary school to WORKING age like you could be 40 in an established career and i think you can definitely still have moments where you're like "there is SOMETHING about me that makes me feel different from everyone and i do not think i belong here"

and in any school setting especially,,, i think that feeling very easily festers in u and oough... theres just a lot of feelings that i want to put into writing and this fic was my way to do it

ALSO PUKING FROM SOCIAL ANXIETY HELP,,, very personal experience,,, i know too intimately the feeling of anxiety becoming PHYSICAL and i think that can be so funny but also tragic sometimes Like the actual devastation of vomiting in public and being like "guys what happened"

i also love that i wrote for blade,, i was shuffling between so many characters for a roommate fic and im gonna be honest i was 2 bottled lemonades away from writing about SAMPO... i will never make that mistake again. i think blade has sweetheart potential in every universe but especially in a modern roommate au,, i think he would be so sarcastic and lovingly mean but have moments of like... AGGRESSIVE vulnerability,,, that line from the fic where he's like "i would do a lot of things if you asked" I stared at that line for five minutes and decided to keep it in becuase it just FELT like it fits him

I'm also absolutely gonna use this as an excuse to plug my in-progress blade hs au supernatural fic... Im so incredibly excited for that because that one is more comedy-oriented and i made blade a sarcastic funny loser in it and i think thats beauitufl... at the end of the day that's what he is... blade my sweetie pie forever and always.... i'll get him on his next rerun banner in four years....

#you've read my mind once again ... i always have a craving to talk about my own fic i have too many thoughts and i MSUT get them out #mmmm yes..... my ego is being cultivated and nourished.... yes.... #trust that the blade hs supernatural au will be finished in.... a month... max... zzzz...... hang tight everyone #also oh gawsh #not to be like 'everything is about being queer for me' but ... everything is about being queer for me #and that feeling of 'something is slightly off' applies not just to having overall social anxiety #but also applies to being queer #its something i felt very often and so theres a twinge of that in my writing very often #feeling very slightly out of place because everyone around you just cant relate to your experiences 100% #mhhh.... underlying themes in writing.....yesss......... #nora answers