#nanonaturalist art heist

[nanonaturalist]

Art Heist

I have no idea which blog to put this in, so you’re welcome in advance.

My brother and I talk to each other approximately once or twice a year. Quality over quantity, you get the idea. We’re only three years apart, and our sense of humor and love for terrible things is identical. For example, we amused ourselves for years by reliving each other’s epic earwax stories (he won—I may have needed medical intervention for a pea-size blockage, but he had a photo that required a coin for a sense of scale).

Anyways, when I randomly got a text message from him out of nowhere yesterday, I knew it was going to be good.

That’s right

This beauty. I must have it. This must be mine.

My brother’s texts reappeared again today (amazing, two days in a row! We are truly up to something!), and he had talked to the curator for the art show at his work regarding the price of the piece.

The dimensions, first off:

36 inches tall by 48 inches wide

That is: 3 feet tall by 4 feet wide

Yes

The price is set at $900. For an original masterpiece? Of such magnitude? I HAVE to have it. This won’t be for sale for a year, that is plenty of time to justify spending $900 for a one-of-a-kind original artwork that transcends species barriers like this.

So I am currently attempting to intimidate the artist, via the curator, with my (super timid) brother acting as an intermediary, into agreeing to sell the painting to me after the show ends in a year, when I can have it shipped from Seattle to Texas, and have it form the centerpiece of my Disturbing Bird Art Wall, because I’ve got plenty of bird art, but oh boy it would all take on a new perspective with this in the center.

Stay tuned (?!)

May 30, 2019

#nanonaturalist meta #meta #nanonaturalist art heist #bird art #bird painting #wall of text #oh hey it’s my autobiography #borderline shitposting #art #probably a bad idea #it matches my haunted rabbit painting