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#not just that.mac won't ever get a bf or a gay onscreen kiss. bcz r.m. wants mac obsessing over denial den. to keep mac gay & never show it
nerdynikki94 · 8 months
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BITTERSWEET RANT ABOUT QUEER (MLM) CHARACTERS IN CURRENT MEDIA
I used to think it was impossible for me to hyperfixate on a show/ship without reading and writing nonstop fanfic about it. But then, a year and a half ago, I watched OFMD and I staunchly refused to read or write any fanfic, because I needed to wait it out and see how the amazing writers planned the story to continue. (I'm ecstatic for October 5th.)
I still considered myself to continue obsessing over my queer ships, especially when I watched Galavant and fell into a bit of a Richard/Gareth hole (but there are very few fics, I planned to write one but kept going back to my Macden fics).
Then, I watched Hannibal, and I tried to read fics, planned one too, but I just couldn't get into it, and preferred obsessively rewatching the show instead.
Now I'm literally refreshing fanvids of our Ineffable Husbands from Good Omens on YT daily, but completely unable to even glance at fics.
It's funny to think how far we are coming with queer characters in media, and I'm just so excited to see shows that refuse to queerbait. They aren't using a viewership by playing with never-ending hints and nods but zero follow through. They are acknowledging that acts of abandonment or betrayal have consequences, regardless of the initial intentions. They refuse to do that kind of disservice to the respective narrative journeys of these characters.
Yes, they may be angsty and a bit sad right now, but Goddammit, we are finally getting sincere, star-crossed gay love stories. Tragic, but not in your typical heartbreaking Brokeback Mountain -esque media from the past (no hate, love the movie, thought the short story was okay).
These queer love stories are giving the same kind of painful passion as some of the best dramatic romances around (one of my fave genres). What a time to be alive! Because it's not an unhappy ending until it ends. The best love stories have to have nearly impossible obstacles. That is how the relationships are tested.
Just thinking about how I've always hyperfixated in the past vs. how I do now. I realized it's because I finally have hope. I can't consume fics because I trust the creators and writers of canon so explicitly that I know they will continue showing how they respect the viewers while also acknowledging the significance, the absolute necessity of delving into the arcs and development the characters need to find within themselves.
I believe David Jenkins and Neil Gaiman are determined to do right (as Bryan Fuller would be, if ever given the chance to continue), not by all the vastly different opinions of the countless countering fans, but by the way they have shown genuine acknowledgement to the romance and enough respect for the love interests to make them face challenges that help them grow. Queer characters are the leads' now, and they are fully-formed yet ever-changing, unique representations, flirting with fun stereotypes, without reducing them to the worst and most inaccurate social stigmas.
So, I'm ever-resolute to hold out for canon, because I don't want to get my head so full of incredible fanfic that I have my opinion change from constantly switching perspectives.
These writers are changing the game so much that I can't help but trust that - even beyond just the romantic aspect - they actually care about the development of the characters, they aren't defined by just being gay, they are complex.
In other words, I'm in a perpetual state of refreshing Macden fic updates every time I want to read something, and trying to conjure the desire to write again, so I can get back this other Macden fic, after having spent the past two years straight writing the most fics I have for any ship in my entire life.
But, yeah, it's totally crazy to realize that the reason I can not read any of the amazing fics out there for Our Flag Means Death, Hannibal & Good Omens is because these shows are already so enthusiastic and welcoming of their queer characters.
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