#on top of that I learned I likely have a 1in3 to 1in2 chance of being ✨totally infertile✨

[littlebluebarista]

that one line from Honest Hearts that's like 'There's nothing you can do. We don't use chems, but I learned long ago that I'm immune to their effects.' yeah that's the only thing keeping me from actually losing it right now

#guess who's ✨incurable✨ and it's just now ✨sinking in✨ #and there's no surgery or procedure or level of pain management that can really ✨fix it✨ #on top of that I learned I likely have a 1in3 to 1in2 chance of being ✨totally infertile✨ #so i get to go through what feels like labor every month for the next 25-30 years and never actually have a ✨family of my own✨ #i am not well this is a low-key cry for help #which will be screamed into the void until morning because the only real support anyone can give me is an I'm Sorry and I'm Praying For You #which isn't their fault #my only consolation right now is that I will hit menopause and/or die one day and then this will finally end #if you're body functions the way God intended it stop and say a prayer thanking the good Lord above that it does #because I didn't do that enough before this hit me and I wish I had #and while you're at it intercede on my behalf because it's all I have left at this point #help #please