#peepaw caerwyn

[whitegoldtower]

Doing my fucking diabolical lemon scented Thalmor/Stormcloak plan with a new OC, Caerwyn.

He’s my oldest OC yet, an Aldmeri war veteran with a very Tywin Lannister approach to things.

Elenwen (his daughter) approached him after he retired as Commander (the title was passed to Ondolemar) asking for his help with a strategy.

He found the embassy to be so lacking that he decided he would do things himself.

“Enough twiddling your thumbs waiting for an opportunity in this civil war. It’s not going to fall into your lap, for gods sakes. I’m going to sort this out, and once I have invited the Dominion in, you best hope it stays ‘sorted out’. You’re a smart girl, use your bloody brain. And by Trinimac, wipe that muck off your face; this isn’t a circus, and you are not a clown, do you hear me?”

So far, peepaw has whipped the Thalmor HQ into shape, alerted Ondolemar, joined Ulfric’s rebellion and forced Whiterun into submission, masquerading as a Stormcloak.

His plan is to cosy up to and put Ulfric on the throne, wait for the economy to crash, then have him either killed by an angry mob or assassinated so that he can take the throne himself as Ulfric’s ‘next in line’. He knows he can win the people over with the argument that /he/ won the war and that he has enough money, and diplomatic skills to provide for the people (unlike Ulfric). Then, he will appoint Ondolemar, Rulindil and Elenwen as his Thanes (with either Ondolemar or Elenwen as his successors), and have his Thalmor sentinels stationed in each of the holds. He will move the Dominion into Skyrim, and woe betide any Justiciar that isn’t doing their job properly.

He’s already reprimanded Elenwen for spending dominion funds on her lavish parties.

Edit: Caerwyn has also adopted a little Altmer boy from Markarth called Faelian. One night, Faelian finds his new adopted father working on his reports in his study, and begins asking about the Dominion (having been in the understone keep for a while, watching Ondolemar), to which Caerwyn looks up from his papers and says,

“You, boy, in the brief time I have known you, have shown more ambition in your little finger than my idiot daughter has her entire time as my first Emissary, you know that? The world is your oyster, and I have full confidence that when you mature, you may yet succeed me.”

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #altmer #ondolemar #ancano #elenwen #peepaw Caerwyn #don’t mess with granddad #Skyrim Game of Thrones Crossover (sort of) #Skyrim with Game of Thrones politics

[whitegoldtower]

“You are a child of the Dominion. Are you a bird of prey, or are you a rat? Because I can tell you something, and listen closely: a bird of prey does not concern itself with the petty affairs of rodents. Wear your badge of office, stop letting it wear you.” - Caerwyn aep Caderyn

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #altmer #ondolemar #ancano #elenwen #rulindil #peepaw Caerwyn #elf dilf

[whitegoldtower]

He’s given his little girl the princess castle

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #altmer #peepaw caerwyn #elenwen

[whitegoldtower]

Oh, Caerwyn. How does it feel to be 100% right about your scheme?

The economy is indeed crashing because Ulfric is too focused on funding his armies and making war plans. It almost feels wrong to rip it out from underneath him - like taking sweets off a child. But it’s just so easy to do, now.

Peepaw certainly doesn’t mess around. In a few mere days, Ulfric will be dead, and Windhelm will be passed to him, along with the title of High King. The Dominion is going to invade, and armies will ensure that: Elenwen’s getting Solitude. Rulindil is going to be Jarl of Whiterun. Markarth now belongs to Ondolemar. Ancano will promoted to Jarl of Winterhold and Hand of the King, And young Faelian will take over Windhelm when he matures, with Caerwyn stepping in, then, as royal Advisor. Syndil is getting Morthal, Maven Black-Briar will be getting Riften, and - given quite a cushy deal, here, Elisif now gets Falkreath. Faelian will marry Elisif when he matures.

The high council will be less like a King and his subjects, and more like a Roman Senate, or a parliament. Once everything has settled down, the holds will be unified under the Senate.

Babe, they’re already here. You just didn’t notice.

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #ancano #altmer #ondolemar #peepaw caerwyn #elenwen #rulindil #elisif the fair

[whitegoldtower]

Well. Caerwyn just ‘liberated’ Markarth and now Ondolemar is sat in his temporary safe house pitching an absolute fit. His two soldiers are completely unbothered, just going about their business, whilst Ondolemar scowls at everything and everyone.

And Caerwyn’s just about had enough of it.

He stands in front of Ondolemar, inquisitively. Ondolemar takes the bait.

“You make me sick, leave me alone.”

Caerwyn is silent for a moment, before he slams his dagger into the table loudly. He waits to see if Ondolemar says anything else before speaking.

“Trinimac inspire me,” His voice is low and quiet, icy cold, “Don’t you dare.” He gets closer to Ondolemar, now, in the same way a viper rears up to strike. “Do you know what I was doing while you were sitting here, stewing over losing that tiny little keep? Hmm? Let me tell you,” He pokes a finger into Ondolemar’s chest, almost nose to nose with him, “While you were sat here, wobbling your lip, I was out,” his voice raises suddenly into a gravelly, terrifying bellow, ��Conquering half of the fucking map for Ulfric Stormcloak, in the snow with naught but a shoddy leather tent to shelter me.”

Ondolemar sits down immediately, dropping into his seat in shock.

“Do you know why I was doing that, instead of finally retiring in Alinor?” His voice is quiet again, but somehow even angrier, and Ondolemar’s face is as white as paper, “Because my daughter wasn’t doing her only job. And Lo and behold, I arrive in Markarth, and look who else I find not doing their job. Do you think I’m fucking stupid? Go on, say something clever.” He waves his hand in dismissal, roughly pulling the dagger out of the wood, sheathing it to put it away.

“Quiet now, are we? Good. Perhaps it will sink in.”

(Ondolemar knows he’s taken it too far because Caerwyn never shouts like that. And dw, he’d never shout at Faelian - when he does shout (which is a rare occurrence anyway) it’s always at another adult)

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #ondolemar #Ondolemar gets told off #peepaw caerwyn #he’s FURIOUS

[whitegoldtower]

Best screenshot from this run:

🔥🥂🔥

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #thalmor oc #altmer #peepaw caerwyn #Spotify

[whitegoldtower]

I find it so very satisfying to think of the Thalmor as a Celtic uprising in an ideal world, colonising the English (Nords) right back. Feels like divine justice.

To finally be stood on top of the world, looking down as you crush a former empire beneath your boot, reeling from the realisation that for the first time in history, you’re the one doing the fucking.

You’re watching the people who fucked your country over for millennia getting absolutely rawdogged by life. You’re getting high on the fact that they can’t even tolerate themselves, leaving the door wide open for you to rip everything out from underneath them.

You’re absolutely ecstatic thinking about destroying their saints who wormed their way into your pantheons. You want to make them regret ever invading your home in the first place, even if you’ve had to wait this long. Perfection takes time.

Your revenge needs to be perfect, needs to be ice cold, and by the gods, you’ll eat your cake and have it, too.

And that’s what I channelled into Caerwyn aep Caderyn when I created him. To create a warlord, you’ve got to think like one, so I took a matter deeply personal to me, and blew it up to a planetary-level scale. Think about what you’d start a war over, and blow it up.

It could be that you’re LGBT, and you would pull an Achilles to be with the one you loved. You’d destroy all of Greece if it meant you could have your Patroclus.

Or, it could be something as minor as wanting to wage war on people who prefer barbecue sauce to ketchup. Make the barbecue sauce the most heinous, disgusting thing you can think of, and begin strategising how you would convert the barbecue sauce lovers into ketchup lovers, or how you would disguise yourself as a ketchup lover whilst slowly adding more and more barbecue sauce to the ketchup supplies until everyone’s drinking barbecue sauce. I don’t know. I don’t particularly care about either. I prefer curry sauce.

My point is, revenge-based strategy is easy once you force your brain into the right balance of emotion/logic. You gotta really sit down and have a conversation with something that enrages you, and feel that rage before you lower it to a simmer whilst you begin planning. But never turn the rage off. Keep it on the back burner. You’ll need it when considering what will enrage your opposition. It will help you remember what they did to you so you can use it against them. You can take their plans and improve them by making them 1000 times worse, and making sure that they work.

And while it may be tempting to show up in Skyrim like

“I didn’t come here to make friends.” 👹👹

Nope. No, that’s exactly what you went there to do. You went there to make friends so that you can gain their trust and more easily deceive them.

Boethiah inspire me, Mephala cloak me, do you see where I’m going with it?

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #altmer #peepaw caerwyn #how to write a warlord

[whitegoldtower]

Yknow what I just can’t believe how WELL my lemon scented diabolical plan actually worked out

I can’t play chess very well, but BOY I SCORED SUCH A CHECKMATE HERE

My predictions were accurate right down to a fucking T

And it’s all because I was taking into consideration real tactics and situations like the whole Brexit fiasco (our economy crashed and everyone hates the politicians responsible 💀) and the Roman Empire, and because I watch way too much Game of Thrones. I love being a double agent.

Also, I got Caerwyn to conquer Skyrim in such a way that the typical Thalmor genocide route wasn’t even necessary - he’s just shit hot on diplomacy, can talk his way out of anything, and knows that people won’t follow you unless they actually like you.

He won the hearts of the stormcloaks, and even though he was conquering them, he made a compromise - if they comply with the Thalmor, then they can keep their Talos worship. Talos will be integrated into the Aldmeri pantheon in the same way that pagan gods and goddesses were integrated into Christianity when Ancient Rome conquered Europe (or most of it).

Because Caerwyn doesn’t actually care what gods are in a pantheon - what he cares about is assimilating them more easily into the Aldmeri dominion, and if that means letting them keep their Talos worship, then so be it.

I played that one out like a fucking emperor let me have my moment 💅💅💅

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #thalmor oc #altmer #peepaw caerwyn

[whitegoldtower]

Caerwyn and the Thalmor rn

MAD BASTARD PULLED IT OFF

#tesblr #skyrim #thalmor #skyrim oc #altmer #peepaw caerwyn