#she gives susie a gift and invites her to study together. not to mention the whole ferris wheel thing

[hellspawnmotel]

“caroline, please kill me” by coma cinema

#i hope this is readable lol #deltarune #susie #noelle holiday #suselle #art tag #man i had a whole thing to type up here and now i forget most of it. ummm #basically ive been thinkin about suselle with the new info we got from the sweepstakes #specifically from noelle's perspective. because up until chapter 2 she wants susie but she doesnt KNOW susie #its an extremely shallow crush which is normal for teenagers but what makes it interesting to me is #how noelle sort of seems more attracted to the danger susie poses than susie herself #and she doesnt really make an attempt to get to know susie personally until ch 2? iirc? #and before that almost seems to hope that susie will treat her as badly as she treats kris #and you could argue whether its bc of noelle's psychological problems or if its just. yknow. a fantasy #either way my point is shes not really thinking about susies feelings. shes not trying to reform the bully or something #so consider this little lyric comic as taking place in noelle's fantasies pre-ch1 #BUT #all that said it doesnt mean noelle isnt open to getting to know susie. obviously #when she sees an opportunity noelle does reach out and not in a way where shes trying to provoke susie to hurt or threaten her #she gives susie a gift and invites her to study together. not to mention the whole ferris wheel thing #i actually think noelle didnt even consider that as an option until susie and kris became friends #and even after chapter 2 noelle doesnt really know susie all that well. and to her susie still exists mostly in the realm of fantasy #but its a start. and they have so much more room to grow and understand each other better #plus susie clearly already cares a lot about noelle #moral of the story is suselle is more compelling than just 'shy girl plus mean girl' #and i like it #good night

[mnovenia]

VISAKU KELARRRRRR <3

God thank you so much for believing in me. Thank you for this privilege, I still can’t believe that this is the time, to live out something that I’ve been dreaming of. I can’t believe how gracious You are, to allow me experiencing this. Sometimes I even wonder what do I need to exchange for something dreamy like this. After all these time, I was taught to ‘always’ be tough, ‘life is hard’, ‘nothing comes easy’, even while I’m being happy, I need to be prepared for I don’t know that something bad would happen. And to go through such a hard hard time, has become something that common in my life. I feel like I never deserve to be treated as a loving daughter or a woman. But with this, I learn that at some point in life, God also teach us to LAUGH, SMILE WIDELY, ENJOY, even you know the truth that we are ‘constantly fighting’ in this world.

Lega banget urusan Visa akhirnya selesai, berjuang naik bus pagi-pagi dan colongan ijin kantor pun berbuah hasil. Seneng juga pertama kali ke kedutaan Belanda, kayak gini toh yang di google tulisannya Embassy of the Kingdom of The Netherlands. Liat orang-orang berjuang berangkat pagi ke Jakarta, jadi sedih sekaligus merasa beruntung juga, gak harus berjuang kayak mereka setiap harinya, tapi di tengah-tengah itu semua, selalu masih ada orang baik yang make life make sense again, contohnya: abang2 yang nolongin penumpang susah turun dari bus saking banyaknya motor di sampingnya.

Anyway, theare are many praises that I would like to address to you God. Iseng2 email ex-penghuni rumah Mba Siska di Groningen, namanya Meilani. She’s nice and quite open to give opinion about her stay in Groningen. And she said at the end of her email: 

“By the way, I left my bike there. It is still in good condition, only the left hand break does not really work properly. I have discussed with Mba Siska that if you want you can just use it. Just please take care of it.

Good luck with your preparation and study. Hope you will have a nice time in Groningen as well!”

See? Small things that I don’t even think about, already been prepared by the Lord. He’s just too big to be understood, but thankyouthankyouthankyouLORD. 

The last few weeks of being in Indonesia was quite busy. I need to arrange moving out, handover my job at office, bank & money for my family, also the never ending farewell. 

I came back and forth to Bandung for mom’s 100 day, etc. Always a ‘hard’ time being there, idk, I guess I just don’t belong there anymore. Well, it’s also depend on the companies, when it’s with Cililitan, I enjoyed every second of it. I said goodbye to Monik & Charlotte, Jutek & Arbi, Noi & Uleel, as well to the big fam from my mom’s side. 

Not so much happen after that, going to pre-departure briefing was a highlight. I got to meet a lots of new friends from all over Indo going to all over Netherlands. Then things went so fast. Meeting with my cousin Amanda, Patty, Kemang hangout w Mayang, Tina & Shan (thanks for the treat Madam), farewell sleepover w Memeh, Gallery National w Cikez n Bebey, farewell Trip w Eteng & TJ, farewell at cyber & w beloved Asiatic, and also w Angin Ribut. So overwhelming because I know there are so much task and checklist that I need to do, and at the same time overwhelmed with the emotion as I don’t know when will I meet them again. Thank you so much guys for the gifts, team Asiatic (Pak Wandi, Ci Silvi, Icha, Tansi, Agustine, Fikka, Alpin, Pak AA, Bu Tri) you guys are so thoughtful in many ways, I bring everything to Holland and really appreciate them as I remember you. Gift after gift came to my house.

Here is my special thanks, a note so then I will never forget that I wouldn’t be able to go without their helps. Tribute to:

1. Bu Abeth, Nadia & Engeline, for contributing a lot for my flight ticket, and your time & care, Bu Abeth, your prayer and never ending support, I can’t thank you enough for believing in me since the very start.

2. Ci Sis, Tante Susi & Ci Debby, thanks so much for everything, doa dan perhatiannya and the thoughtful gift. They gave me Euro even when I hadn’t buy any. And heat tech yang aku pake selalu, loph you full acik <3 Thankyou udah bersedia aku repotin dengan banyak hal yang aku tinggalin di Indo

3. Tepi & Yoan, my supporters & cheerleaders, thankyou walau kalian sibuk tp masih sempetin pergi2 sama aku & coming all the way from mei2 just to spend time together. Continue to pray for you both <3

4. Vina & Kajuls Family, aku sampe ga enak banget sama kalian sampe harus kasih bgitu.. I just wanted to say goodbye properly and being relieve to see Vina & her new life, also pamit ke Kajuls & Boy, tapi malah kaliah yg terus memberi selama aku hidup ini perasaan, terharu banget for your thoughtfulness to spare some (that I believe you also need it) for me. THANKYOU, i will never forget!

5. Ka Armand & Ka Claudia, thank you that you show how proud you are of me. You guys are the most supportive family (esp from my mom’s side), your words and opinions are things that I value the most and will remember as I am being in the Netherlands. Also for ‘the gift’, banyak banget sampe gatau lagi mau bilang apa.. THANKYOU SO MUCH!

6. Tante Pin, thank you a sincere love, invited me to dinner, bought me Jacket, and the laptop, they all mean a lot to me. Even roti tante aku bawa and makan di kereta di Belanda. Thankyou for your never ending love for my family

7. Shannen & Family, for opening your house for my stay at the few last days, and giving me roof and enjoyable stay. And to pray for me, to pack all the stuffs for my travel, and feed me A LOT.

8. Janis, thank you for your concern and the friendship over these past year. And your willingness to help and contribute for my study ‘fund’, thankyou for being supportive and keep saying ‘you deserve it’, that means a lot me

9. Mayang & Lina, my buddies, (and also Launy and team), that successfully made a beautiful farewell party. I love you guys so much.

10. Nongky & Thendra, for everything since months ago, you’re not giving up to encourage me, sending me different links to keep trying, and even to the very last minutes, you guys still care to meet me, think about my future and most importantly, keep me in your thoughts and prayer.

11. Peter & May Yee (and family), over these past year God sent you into my life. You may have no idea of how much I was encouraged to know that you care for me so much, while none of my own family do. I never know how to repay your kindness, and sometimes I ask God why would you even do all these things to me. It's very hard to accept love that I never thought I deserve, but through you & Peter, I know it exist, even when I feel like I'm useless to you. Thankyou once again May Yee, I'll never forget. For the farewell dinner, and the gift that is so much to me. I know God will repay you in return.

12. And Fenny (and family and Mike), for buying my house and being so gracious. DANK JE WEL

And many many others that I may forget to mention. But I do, I do really appreciate you.

After all, I just realized of how much God loves me through all of you guys. Sometimes, I don’t even know what did I do, that made God moves your heart to help me, in different forms. But from this experience, I just want to testify that: He who promised is faithful. 

John 14:16 I will ask the Father, and he will give you another helper who will be with you forever.

Deuteronomy 31:8 The LORD is the one who is going ahead of you. He will be with you. He won’t abandon you or leave you. So don’t be afraid or terrified.