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decima-simming · 5 years

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ULTIMATE Strangetown Male Premade Ratings!

Welcome to the sequel (Electric Boogaloo!) to ULTIMATE Belladonna Cove Male Premade Ratings! The reception to my last post has been so positive and I feel compelled to continue these ratings. By popular demand, I’m going to rate the Strangetown men! So without further ado, here’s my ratings on all the male Strangetown premades (excluding teens and children) based on looks and if I want to date them.

What the fuck? No, seriously, what the fuck? I don’t know where to start with this guy. Loki Beaker? You mean to tell me he is named after the Norse god of mischief and he looks like that? The actual Loki must have messed with his face, there is no other explanation. Maybe the reason why he commits unethical experiments is because he literally cannot see. How can you look back at what you do if you literally can’t? Nevertheless, not only is he ugly as sin, he is an awful human being. No hot evil male scientists allowed in The Sims, thanks EA/Maxis! -100/10.

What happens when a hot alleged serial killer and the Grim Reaper (yes, really) have a child? This bony, lanky guy, apparently. Wow, Grim must have compensated with his amazing personality. According to his gender preferences, he dislikes women, and I can’t really blame him. If the only women in my life were my neglectful mother and my abusive scientist adopted mother, I would hate women, too! I’m not going to bash Nervous Subject too harshly (I already did, but oh well), but I’ll say this: The only way he could be bangeable is if he showed his Grim genes. You know, show some ribs, wear a black cloak, become stronger than SimGod, all that hot shit. It could be worse, though; he could look like this in actual gameplay. Phew. 4/10

Don’t let the headshot fool you, Pascal Curious looks way better in gameplay (especially with default replacement skins and a new hairstyle *chef kiss*). Waaay too obsessed with fucking aliens, but he seems like a good-natured guy, I can tolerate him. His bio says he collects conspiracy theories and now I’m . . . curious. *ba dum tss* 6.5/10

Wow, the universe really hates Vidcund Curious! First that stupid name, then he pisses himself publicly, his hot as fuck girlfriend breaks up with him, he was once Buzz’s punching bag (then again, who wasn’t?), Sims can’t stand his jokes (I feel plagiarized!), the chances of being betrayed by him are 100%, and worst of all, that haircut is an abomination. Hey, Vidcund, the 70′s called! They want you to stop associating yourself with the era! 3/10

Wowie, hot TAMALE! Lazlo Curious is the hottest man in Strangetown, DO NOT TRY TO CHANGE MY MIND! He is chill, he is smart, he is cool, and with the right default replacements (an example by yours truly) . . . oh yeah, BABY! 10/10!!!!!!

Oh, boy, this is going to open a can of worms. Good thing he has boyish good looks because everything else about him is fucking ugly. And before y’all jump down my throat, barbershop quartet singing is not redeemable! Where do I even start? In his youth, he had the reputation of physically fighting every boy in Strangetown, and that can be highly associated with his exaggerated serious nature and lack of nice points. He has severe anger issues, I want him to stay far away from me. And now someone is going to jump from their bush and try to catch me with a “Gotcha!” because boys will be boys, they need to fight because he is A BOY, anger in boys is natural, tears are for pussies! Also, he probably grew out of it anyway, stupid Merary/Decima! Hominem, you are so wrong, because he clearly did not grew out it. Let me ask you something, who did Buzz, a grown man, tried to fight lately? That’s right, he fought PT9, who looks very old when it happened! Shame on you, General Buzz Grunt! This is purely speculative, but considering how one of the following memories is Lyla breaking up with him, maybe, just maybe, Lyla left him because of his hot-headiness and harsh nature towards his neighbors. He was a terrible husband, but is even worse as a father. I have no sympathy for parents who pit their children against each other (Hello, Daniel and Mary-Sue!) and the whole situation with Tank and Ripp saddens me so much. Every time I play the Grunt family for the first time, Buzz’s first autonomous action is to always insult or poke Ripp. Fuck this guy. Maybe stop forcing your children into following your steps and treat them like human beings? Yes? No? Pft, no wonder Olive wants to call you to possibly kill you, no one in this town likes you other than your eldest son! Also, I’m not a fan of the military, so even if he is good at his job, I’m going to judge him because of it. I’m against xenophobia (”They are aliens, not human! Doesn’t count!” Yeah, so?), so he gets minus points with that. Well, at least he tried, right? The only useful thing about him is that he makes a good front for family dinners because of his career and good looks. See, Mom and Dad? I’m not a gold-digger! Would I screw him? Yes. -5/10.

Don’t think for one second that I’m letting Pollination Tech#9 Smith off the hook. PT9 is that deadbeat dad who at first you don’t like until he learns a lesson about responsibility and decency. Good thing Lola and Chloe ended up fine, NO THANKS TO HIM! Also, he is a thot! Pollinating a man with twins and then banging his human daughter the old-fashioned way, creating the most complicated family tree of all time? Also, the PSP canon says that he had a family back home? Saucy! Apart from that, he seems like a good husband and father to his legitimate children; it’s the bare minimum, but I’m a sucker for it. Love the Hawaiian shirt, you funky alien man, you. 5/10

And finally, Ajay Loner. Ajay’s biggest sin is that Maxis/EA didn’t care too much about him because they barely gave him a personality or a good haircut. Fortunately, default replacements, better hair, a bit of a scruff, and a non-sporty shirt make him look decent, even cute and hot! The best makeover of him, in my opinion, is AldoHyde’s Ajay Loner. Like I said, a scruff really suits him! What more can I say, I like him. 7/10

You really read all of that? Thanks for allowing me to waste your time, it was my pleasure! <3

#Sims 2 #Strangetown #Loki Beaker #Nervous Subject #General Buzz Grunt #Buzz Grunt #Pascal Curious #Vidcund Curious #Lazlo Curious #PT9 Smith #Pollination Technician 9 Smith #Ajay Loner #I hope I gave y'all whiplash!

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