#so much shit chat last year about Hamilton’s dominance | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shortqueershakespeare · 4 years

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ALL QUESTIONS!! ALLLLL (except the one you said you were uncomfy answering ofc)

welcome to my daily essay procrastination (dw it is getting done I've just written like 1000 words and I need a break from literature type writing lol)

1: Full name - Robin, not sharing the rest (like I said)

2: Age - 21

3: 3 Fears - Abandonment, clowns, sleep paralysis

4: 3 things I love - Theatre, languages, my puppy

5: 4 turns on - Being dominated, lip biting, gentle physical contact, increasing physical contact

6: 4 turns off - I genuinely don't know rn can u tell its been a while since I got laid lol, so I guess, being a dick, using certain terms for body parts,

7: My best friend - Char is prob my best friend!! we currently communicate exclusively through animal crossing post lol

8: Sexual orientation - Right this is somewhat challenging still but I'm gonna go gay

9: My best first date - Would you believe I've only really been on two? I can't remember the first one v well but I'd be inclined to say that because all that first love shit was great

10: How tall am I - 5' 3" i think??

11: What do I miss - uni

12: What time were I born - I actually don't know exactly but it was definitely the afternoon

13: Favourite color - Baby blue

14: Do I have a crush - Yup

15: Favourite quote - "The universe is seeming really huge right now. I need something to hold on to."

16: Favourite place - I've got a few, a corner in the orchard at Hom, the nook under my window in my room, the bench up on the hill where I walk the dog

17: Favourite food - Stir fry

18: Do I use sarcasm - I think I was fluent in sarcasm before I was in English tbh

19: What am I listening to right now - Right technically I cheated bc I just skipped a couple songs, but Bad Habit by Ben Platt and the puppy's snores

20: First thing I notice in new person - Smile or voice

21: Shoe size - 4 i think

22: Eye color - blue

23: Hair color - a literal rainbow

24: Favourite style of clothing - uhhh does generally gay count??

25: Ever done a prank call? - nope

27: Meaning behind my URL - one of my friends once called me the shakespeare of nicknames as my other friend called my such a slytherin so i mashed them up

28: Favourite movie - Moana atm, non animated either Let It Snow or Pitch Perfect

29: Favourite song - Obv this changes a lot but the last few days, Wonderland by Taylor Swift

30: Favourite band - Stornoway

31: How I feel right now - Too damn warm and a lil sleepy

32: Someone I love - my sister

33: My current relationship status - furiously single

34: My relationship with my parents - good

35: Favourite holiday - when my friend and i went to austria at the end of year 13

36: Tattoos and piercing i have - zero

37: Tattoos and piercing i want - I want a few transition tattoos, a dodie lyric, something in russian, something watercolour

38: The reason I joined Tumblr - Originally because it was 2013 and my friends and I were v much the typical tumblr demographic, this one to vent feelings about some shitty situations

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? - Pretty sure they both hate me, I don't hate them, but I hate how things worked out

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? - Sometimes yeah

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? - Nope

42: When did I last hold hands? - Probably when I last went clubbing?

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? - Depends, I have to put T on, once i'm actually out of bed probably 15 minutes

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? - nope

45: Where am I right now? - on my sofa in my kitchen

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? - depends where i am, home city it'd be katherine, clubbing in cam, jules probably or char, drinking just in cam, umme or porters

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? - reasonable

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? - usually mostly with mum, currently exclusively with dad because quarantine

49: Am I excited for anything? - getting this damn essay done and sleeping

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? - yep

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? - not that often i don't think, but i am very good at hiding my emotions if i decide to

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? - like 6 hours ago?

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? - not at all unexpected tbh

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? - not at the moment, i think i've managed to stop trusting the person who would've fit this category

55: What is something I disliked about today? - my sister got super stressed and cried and i just wanted to make everything okay

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? - ben platt

57: What do I think about most? - rn animal crossing or work

58: What’s my strangest talent? - i don't think i have one

59: Do I have any strange phobias? - nope

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? - both, i love taking photos and i love having photos of me at important times

61: What was the last lie I told? - god probably something dumb like no i absolutely did not just steal your cup of tea

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? video chatting

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? - no, yes

64: Do I believe in magic? - no

65: Do I believe in luck? - yes

66: What’s the weather like right now? - decent I think?? it's like 2 am so idk

67: What was the last book I’ve read? - What Is to Be Done? by Chernyshevsky

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? - Fuck no

69: Do I have any nicknames? - Bob, Bobbin, Robs, Rob, Stink, Little'un

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? - that would probably be me getting a fish hook stuck in my thumb lollll

71: Do I spend money or save it? - both

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue? - the fact that this said a tongue and not my tongue is... unsettling.. but yes

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? - yes

74: Favourite animal? - elephant

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? - writing the essay lol

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? - morningstar i watch too much lucifer lol

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? - rain by ben platt

78: How can you win my heart? - hug me when i'm sad, send me things that make you think of me

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? - he was there for me

80: What is my favorite word? - mousse

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr - okay so i have five blogs and am so tempted to just list those but sewing-and-showtunes, aeternumregina, oneoveroneisone, ballym, xx-thedarklord-xx

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? - STAY THE FUCK INDOORS

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? - no

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? - shapeshifting

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? - do i like myself

86: What is my current desktop picture? - hamilton and laurens lol 8

7: Had sex? - yes

88: Bought condoms? - yes

89: Gotten pregnant? - no

90: Failed a class? - yes

91: Kissed a boy? - yes

92: Kissed a girl? - yes

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? - yes

94: Had job? - yes

95: Left the house without my wallet? - yes

96: Bullied someone on the internet? - no

97: Had sex in public? - yes

98: Played on a sports team? - yes

99: Smoked weed? - yes

100: Did drugs? - no

101: Smoked cigarettes? - yes

102: Drank alcohol? - yes

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? - no

104: Been overweight? - no

105: Been underweight? - no

106: Been to a wedding? - no

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? - yes

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? - yes

109: Been outside my home country? - yes

110: Gotten my heart broken? - yes

111: Been to a professional sports game? - no

112: Broken a bone? - no

113: Cut myself? - yes

114: Been to prom? - no

115: Been in airplane? - yes

116: Fly by helicopter? - no

117: What concerts have I been to? - dodie, stornoway, show of hands

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? - yes

119: Learned another language? - yes

120: Wore make up? - yes

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? - yes

122: Had oral sex? - yes

123: Dyed my hair? - yes

124: Voted in a presidential election? - i'm british

125: Rode in an ambulance? - yes

126: Had a surgery? - not unless my fish hook extraction counts

127: Met someone famous? - yes

128: Stalked someone on a social network? - yes

129: Peed outside? - yes

130: Been fishing? - FISH HOOK YES I HAVE I NEVER WILL AGAIN

131: Helped with charity? - yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? - yes

133: Broken a mirror? - no

134: What do I want for birthday? - a boyfriend lol, or tbh for quarantine to be over

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names? - oh lord who knows, i like the name scottie and archie for girls

136: Was I named after anyone? - my middle name is after my gran

137: Do I like my handwriting? - ehhhh

138: What was my favourite toy as a child? - my teddy bear

139: Favourite Tv Show? - Crazy Ex Girlfriend

140: Where do I want to live when older? - Berlin, Cambridge or London

141: Play any musical instrument? - used to play the violin v poorly

142: One of my scars, how did I get it? - fish hook or pets

143: Favourite pizza topping? - pepperoni

144: Am I afraid of the dark? - no

145: Am I afraid of heights? - sort of

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? - don't think so

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? - yes

148: What I’m really bad at - currently? being motivated

149: What my greatest achievements are - getting into my uni, finally finding an antidepressant that works, coming out

150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me - oh yikes it's way too late at night to open that can of worms

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery - pay for my damn top surgery

152: What do I like about myself - I'm empathetic

153: My closest Tumblr friend - @oneoveroneisone

154: Something I fantasise about - going to pride abroad

155: Any question you’d like? - I'm gonna pass this to the anons, ask me questions?

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thefootballlife · 7 years

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Attack on Titan - A response to James Gheerbrant's Times Article on if Celtic's dominance is damaging Scottish football

I received an email on Wednesday evening asking if I'd like to help a journalist with an article he was writing. I spent 10-15 mins on the phone to him on Thursday morning having a pretty pleasant chat and then received an email later in the day asking if it was OK to put my name in as a quote. I replied this was fine (because, the amount of people who don't ask is far larger than those who do!) and awaited to read it.

The article itself can be read on The Times’ website at http://www.thetimes.co.uk/edition/sport/scotland-the-worst-title-race-in-europe-since-1932-z68l83g02

While it's always fair to be sceptical of any article which describes me as an expert (including, if not especially, those where I describe myself as such), Gheerbrant’s article was one described by Duncan McKay as “here’s my agenda and I'll find ways of showing you how right I am”. This much was, to be fair, fairly apparent from my conversation with him. He was given (or had already come to) a conclusion and his role as writer was to make everything stack up to prove that hypothesis.

Every writer does that. Even me. If I'm writing an article, I'll often know the end before the start because one of my focuses is to attempt to both start and finish a piece with a good line. From a perspective of method, generally I do about 50% of articles on a “I should write on this to be timely”, 25% on “this idea has come into my head and I want to get it down” and the other 25% is where I have a witticism I want to use and build an article round.

Obviously, someone making their way in the world with the fricking Times of London has less freedom. A quick flick of his articles shows an EPL focus and then bits where he has clearly been tasked with a specific article that’s a “story”. So, before I get into the nitty-gritty of today’s article, let me note that, from having spoken to James Gheerbrant on both email and phone, I agree with Duncan McKay’s quote above and got that feeling in advance.

In the English bubble, it is very easy to just take a pop at Scottish football when you need to feel a bit better about yourself. It was, bluntly, an article that justifies why the Times do next to nothing on Scottish football the rest of the season. As an example, why comment on Hamilton’s average attendance so far this season being down by 443 as proof Scottish football is dying when you could just as easily take the fact that St Johnstone’s has risen by an almost identical amount as proof it is in rude health or that Kilmarnock’s attendances have risen by over 1000.

I can do anything with statistics to prove a point and to pick on two clubs, Aberdeen and Hamilton - one of whom are not challenging for the title his season and one who are the smallest club in the league - to show proof Scottish football is on the rocks is a bit of a stretch. So far this season, in the Premiership, attendances outside of Celtic and Rangers have risen by an average of 70 fans per game. Now, that, to me, is more or less static - you can merely say “attendances are on the up” and use that to prove that Scottish football is on the rise. To see those statistics and argue that they prove that Scottish football is in some sort of terminal decline is to wilfully ignore certain parts of evidence.

Now, you will note that in none of this am I claiming that I was personally misquoted - I was not. My part in the article is a brief two paragraphs about a section of the season in which Celtic games drew lower than usual ratings which I surmised could only have been due to fans turning off because of Celtic's dominance. And the fact that SPFL ratings are strong overall has not been missed.

What most will know without me having to say it is that one thing I am incapable of is getting my point across so succinctly. In my ten or so minute chat I also mentioned that that short period had rebounded back to normal now, that I felt the issue was less to do with Celtic and more to do with the promotion of the league as a whole by the SPFL, and that it would be difficult to blame Celtic for certain based on only half a season. There was no mention of elements such as the external factors such as Rangers, unlegal streaming in Scotland being higher than average and the fact that Celtic were crap to watch last season - all things I said.

Now, I would be a complete hypocrite to call someone out for selective quoting - everyone does it, including me. It is not my right to say that someone should present work that is contrary to the brief they have been given and how they get there. It is my right to then say that I disagree with the overall conclusion and to offer an argument to back up my position. I cannot imagine that many people would have a ten minute conversation with me about Scottish football and come to the conclusion that I'm really pessimistic about it or that I hold the opinion that the club I support is somehow killing the game (and, if that was a view I held, I'd say it because I do believe I call Celtic out on their shit more than most Celtic fans).

Here is something I do believe - this Celtic team are a once in a generation freak. Had they got third in the CL group, they would be live contenders for the Europa League. Gordon Smith and Archie McPherson may have lost interest, but I haven't. Celtic might be 27 points clear but there is a live race for Europe, there is a relegation dog fight. If we want to discuss dominance and lack of interest, we could look to Slovakia whose league is all but won and who won't have a relegation this year thanks to Spartak Myjava going crazy.

Even if one subscribes to there being a decline (which, long term, there has been, but medium term there has not), blaming it on Celtic is a bit rich. It is not for Celtic to justify UEFA only giving small countries on CL place. If one wants to criticise Celtic for having larger revenues, then one must lay the blame at the door of UEFA for creating a system which only increases the disparity in revenues in smaller countries. Basel - on for 8 in a row, Dinamo Zagreb - going for 12 in a row - yet are there articles calling out Basel as killing the Swiss Super League? Is Celtic’s dominance a problem or a natural by-product of other problems endemic in football? Is this a short term issue or a long-term reaction to changes made by UEFA in the Champions League, etc 25 years ago in an effort to increase its commercial appeal?

Issues like this cannot be taken in isolation but they are, ultimately, works of opinion. My opinion is that the opinion espoused by the Times is incorrect. This Celtic team is the best for 15 years and, excluding relegations, etc, are there really any sides in the SPFL Premiership who are actually worse than 5 years ago, in the first season after Rangers’ collapse? Would we rather see Louis Moult or Michael Higdon?

The Times opinion has been backed up using alternative facts and the basis of two football games. Had Gheerbrant viewed St Johnstone 2 Celtic 5 or Motherwell 3 Celtic 4 instead of Celtic-Inverness or a midweek game between Accies and Aberdeen (which naturally has a low turnout because it’s a work night and Hamilton is a 7 hour plus round trip in rush hour) then would he have not seen a really entertaining game of vibrant football rather than an epic rearguard effort or an expected trouncing? Putting in the headline “Attendances have collapsed across the league” is, bluntly, an outright falsehood - as mentioned earlier, on average even without Celtic or Rangers, attendances are up and, when the two Glasgow giants are included, that propels it up massively to around 14,000 extra fans on average across the league. If that is collapse, I would love to see what success looks like.

Scottish football is not in this sort of dramatic collapse as pictured by the Times. The game in Scotland is comparatively trouble free compared to other leagues in similar states such as Croatia, who not only have to deal with a decade of domestic Dinamo dominance (that may end this season) but also empty stands far worse than seen in Scotland - Dinamo have a stadium for 35,000 and a highest domestic attendance of 11,000. No-one is going to argue it is in the rudest of health, but failing to appreciate there are legitimate external factors around why Scottish football isn’t where it was 20 years ago is the height of ignorance. Nor, for that matter, is dipping in once a season to talk down to Scottish fans anything approaching comprehensive coverage nor does it give you any right to claim it is in terminal decline.

Does Celtic’s dominance damage Scottish football? Why not ask, does UEFA’s coefficient system damage smaller nations? Have the economics of football reached a point where leagues tend towards monopoly?

Or most importantly, why not ask a question that might actually challenge your readers as opposed to selectively quoting to reach a lazy conclusion that was already decided before pen was put to paper?

We’d all benefit if journalists did a bit more of that.

Also, the second paragraph of the Times’ article features the word “Rodgers’s”. If you can carry on reading after than piece of punctuation homicide, well done.

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