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albionscastle · 5 years

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First Impressions Part 9

I’m not going to lie, I’ve been in a dreadful funk since getting back from Scotland and I haven’t written hardly at all. But I was putting up the tree and thought of a scene which turned into this.

This chapter doesn’t really further the story much but gives an insight into what Lizzie and Jack are thinking.

MASTERLIST AND PREVIOUS CHAPTERS

FIRST IMPRESSIONS PART 9 - SNOW DAY

LIZZIE

Winter had officially arrived, several weeks early in fact. Lizzie sat in her window watching the children walking to school, bundled in their coats and scarves, happily throwing snowballs at one another. Shop owners were salting and shovelling the sidewalks while the trucks came along to give the same treatment to the roads. The first decent snow of the season the week before Thanksgiving was almost unheard of. Since Lizzie had been in high school it had only snowed before Christmas maybe three times. Up at 6am she’d already shovelled the sidewalk outside the theatre, the landlord was far too old to be having to worry about it and if she was honest she enjoyed the simple labor of it.

What she didn’t like, however, was driving in the snow, especially in or around Chicago. She’d admittedly been called a crazy driver more than once but she had nothing on the idiots who came out in the bad weather. It was far safer for her and everyone else for her to just, not. The museum had already been informed that she wouldn’t be back until March, and honestly Lizzie was looking forward to taking the time off to explore some online classes, anything to pad her resume. Today, though, she was free just to relax and watch the flakes fall while she nursed her tea.

A ping from her phone distracted her, no-one usually texted her at 7am unless it was an emergency, or they wanted her to work.

Brad: Hey Red! It’s snowing!

Lizzie rolled her eyes. In the weeks since Charlie’s birthday, the weird feeling she’d had about Brad had almost vanished and she’d engaged with him a lot more. Though she had yet to take him up on his offers of dinner, she had allowed him to sit beside her at the movies once or twice. For his part, Brad had eased off while still making his attraction clear. Lizzie couldn’t understand why she was so reticent about getting involved with him. On paper he was a hell of a catch - gorgeous, charming, successful, friendly and fun. Brad Wickham ticked a lot of boxes, except two. Attraction and trust.

The truth was - she just didn’t think of him in that way. If he brushed her hand or touched her she felt nothing. Literally nothing, it just wasn’t there for her and no amount of trying had changed that. There was also the niggling feeling in the back of her mind that she just couldn’t trust him. Whether it was because he was just too perfect, or her own personal fears, she just couldn’t tell, but it was there.

It didn’t stop her from enjoying his friendship though.

Lizzie: Your powers of perception are second to none. I never would have guessed.

Brad: Ha ha, there’s talk they may cancel filming today.

Lizzie: It’s barely a dusting! And wouldn’t that just put production behind? Brad: Nah, we only have a few days of filming left and today is just us lowly bit part actors lol

He was right, Lizzie realised suddenly. Even Tom had mentioned more than once that the whole thing would be done by Thanksgiving, which was only seven days away. She made a mental note to ask Maya what plans her and Tom had made.

Lizzie: I forgot you will all be out of our hair this week.

Brad: Well our mutual ‘friend’ will be, me, I might stick around for a while.

Don’t.

She didn't’;t even realise that she’d said the word out loud the thought was so sudden. But Lizzie knew without a doubt that deep down she didn’t want Brad to stay in town once production finished.

Lizzie: trust me, there’s NOTHING here in the winter. Just ice and assholes, other than that, nothing happens.

There was no text for a while and Lizzie hoped that she’d gotten the message across diplomatically enough. She knew damn well what he meant when he talked about staying and she didn’t want to give him false hope.

Brad: Subject change, are you going to the wrap party?

Lizzie: Half the city was invited so yes. What about you?

Brad: Well it's sure to be awkward but I’m determined to. After all, Jack’s the one who should be ashamed, not me. If he doesn’t want to see me there he can leave and hide in his hotel room.

Lizzie: Now that would make the night perfect lol

Brad: Gotta go, we just got called. TTYL

The wrap party had been a bone of contention for Lizzie since the invitations arrived. Her mother and Lydia were over the moon, naturally, but when Lizzie had suggested she stay home with Ben she had been vetoed across the board. Reluctantly she’d had to agree to go, even though she wanted to avoid a great many of the people who would be there.

Still, maybe the night would be bearable with Brad and Charlie there. Maybe.

As expected, the snow had eased off by mid-morning and would be melted away by late afternoon. Maya had arrived at lunch, arms stacked with books and looking all flustered.

“Can I study here? If I go home Mom is just going to distract me and I’ll get nothing done, I’m behind already.”

Lizzie couldn’t say no to Maya, even if her presence meant that her planned day of solitude had gone out the window. Leaving her sister with her law books spread out all over the dining table, Lizzie had pottered around cleaning the apartment and hauling the Christmas boxes down from the storage room. Chloe was strict about the tree not going up until December and Colin had never allowed one. This year she was going to have it her way, Christmas was her favorite time of year.

It was dark by five and finally Maya shut her books.

“I’m done. All caught up, thanks Lizzie.”

“No probs, are you hungry?”

“Famished, I should get home for dinner.”

“I’ll rustle something up, stay and relax for a while.”

Lizzie could see Maya’s forehead wrinkle nd she knew what was bothering her.

“You have plans with Tom?”

“Just dinner with him and Jack.” Maya looked guilty.

Taking a deep breath, Lizzie made the decision.

“Invite them here.”

The thankful look on Maya’s face was worth any irritation that Lizzie felt at the prospect of Jack being in her apartment. Besides there were just a days left and she was, as always, willing to put up with anything if it meant Maya’s happiness.

Lizzie busied herself in the kitchen, making sure she was busy when the men in question arrived. She could hear their voices, the difference between their accents always so clear. Despite herself, she enjoyed the burrs and lilts when Jack spoke and loathed that she actually found his voice quite comforting.

“Could ye use a hand?”

Speak of the devil and he’ll pop his head into your kitchen.

“I’m actually good.” Lizzie didn’t even look up from chopping the carrots.

“Are ye sure? I think those two want some time alone, if ye ken?”

You could have stayed home, she thought bitterly.

“Fine, can you chop these for me?” she sighed.

“What are makin?” he took the knife from her hand and got to work.

“A coconut curry, nothing special.”

“Sounds better than McDonalds again.”

Lizzie couldn’t help but snicker. Whiting wasn’t known as a hub for the discerning diner, and their McDonald's even had a Facebook page declaring it the worst in existence. For good reason.

“You’re gambling with your life eating at that shithole.”

“Take it up wi’ the young’un, he’s go a stomach made o cast iron.”

“And apparently the taste to go with it if he willingly eats that crap to begin with.”

“Well, to be fair, the lad’s no had a lot of experience past uni, and ye know how tha goes.”

“I remember. I existed on a diet of ramen, takeout and toast. Oh and chocolate, naturally.”

“Naturally.” he chuckled, sliding the veggies into the skillet at Lizzie’s beckoning.

The conversation lapsed into a comfortable silence as the meal came together. Jack seemed able to anticipate her needs and they worked together like a well-oiled machine.

“It’s almost ready, let me check the rice.”

Lizzie lifted the lid on the pot and held her hand out for a fork. Jack handed one to her, fingers sliding over hers as he placed it in her palm. The jolt that hit her made her catch her breath, hand shaking as she gripped the utensil. The last time he’d touched her this hadn’t happened, but she’d been upset and his touch had been comforting in the face of Colin.

This. This was trouble.

Lizzie waited until Jack went to set the table before she let out her breath, her hand still tingling and her body far too warm for comfort.

What the fuck had just happened? JACK

His hand was twitching, literally twitching as he flexed his fingers. He’d seen Elizabeth take a deep breath and he knew that she felt it too. The attraction that simmered was white hot and coursing through his veins and it was all he could do to slow his breathing. Jack barely even paid attention to what he was doing, his mind wandering to far more interesting thoughts.

Stop it! He muttered to himself before his body betrayed his thoughts.

Jack forced himself to calm down before going back into the kitchen. Elizabeth had her back to him as she transferred food to serving dishes. He took a moment to appreciate her, even all covered up she was a treat. For a brief moment he allowed himself to imagine walking up behind her, lifting her braid so he could press his lips to her neck. In his mind she leaned back into him with a smile as his arms wrapped around her waist, holding her as he whispered in her ear.

“Can you get the others?”

His bubble burst and reality came into sharp focus as he called out to Tom and Maya, taking a serving dish from the counter. He gave himself credit for rallying well during dinner, telling stories from different sets that had the women howling with laughter. There were moments he noticed that Elizabeth would have her brows furrowed in confusion, and he definitely noticed her watching him when she thought he wasn’t looking.

Bolstered, he not only dragged Tom to make sure they did the cleaning up, but he also broached the subject of the Christmas boxes in the corner.

“Lizzie always was gung ho about getting Christmas up and moving.” Maya laughed. “Mom would never even let her look at tinsel until December.”

“I’m all fer decorating early ma’self.” Jack shrugged, noting Elizabeth’s surprise. “There’s summan magical about Christmas an I think the longer ye can experience it each year the better.”

He didn’t add that he hadn’t decorated his flat since Lisa buggered off and even then it had been all her, designed purely to be shown off and with no warmth or charm. There had been no magic to it.

“Lizzie! Why don’t we do it now?” Tom suddenly piped up with excitement.

Good boy, Jack thought as he murmured his agreement to the idea.

“Well I guess we could.” she seemed uncertain at first but he could see the excitement brimming in her eyes.

That was all it took. Within minutes the boxes had been dragged into the center of the room and the corner emptied.

“I prefer real trees,” Elizabeth sighed she cut open the huge box containing the tree. “But I couldn’t justify the expense when I already had this.”

As it was, her fake tree was impressively real-looking, and large. Jack could see that it had been packed away for quite some time as even the scent packets in with it had lost their smell. It was a lovely tree but in the back of his mind all he could think was that he deserved the real thing.

Maya lit pine-scented candles, while Tom turned on a Christmas playlist. Jack helped Elizabeth piece the tree together, pulling and fluffing the branches until it looked perfect. For the next hour or so, lights and tinsel were hung, and box after box of baubles opened. Many were the typical colorful glass balls, glittering stars, pretty but impersonal. The last couple of boxes were different. He watched the sisters as they lifted each one out, some hand made and some old and well loved. There was even a box of ornaments that were nothing but Star Wars, Marvel, Disney, a wonderland of pop culture. Jack’s personal favorite was a Darth Vader in an ugly sweater who spoke about presents and Sithmas every time someone moved past him.

“When did you get all these, Lizzie?” Maya was hanging a golden Snitch beside a sparkly Merida.

Tom was unboxing a Captain America and jack was playing with a shark that played the Jaws theme.

“I’ve just bought them at sale over the years, Mom never wanted them on the tree and Colin…” Jack watched her visibly gather herself. “He wasn’t big on Christmas.”

It occured to Jack that this might well be the first time Elizabeth had her own tree, in her own home, and he wasn’t sure how it was making him feel. Shaking his head to try and clear his thoughts he handed her the shark, watching her while she hung it. After it all was done and the boxes carted back to storage, Jack stood back looking at what they’d done.. The tree was a hodge podge, with no apparent style or theme and he had to admit he thought it was perfect. The result was warm, inviting and somehow uniquely Elizabeth. This apartment wasn’t designed to please anyone but her and it worked, in the fact that one felt so much at home here.

His flat in London was pathetically sterile, had been even during the time he shared it with Lisa. She’d been all for the ultra modern, with white everything and the place had looked like a damn photoshoot. He’d been afraid to even sit on the fucking couch. In the year that she’d been gone the only thing he’d done with the place was buy a couch and a tv, most of the time that was where he slept too. If he was with a woman it had always been at her place or a hotel, somewhere that he could make a quick, discrete exit. There had been no morning afters, no desire to have a woman in his space.

Until now.

Elizabeth would hate his place, he knew by looking at her jewelled throws and little knick knacks, and he’d be embarrassed to take her there. But here, he could see something more than taking her to bed and sneaking out while she was asleep. He could see snuggling on the couch as a movie played, he could see cooking together again.

He could see a future and it scared him to death.

It wasn’t possible, least of all with her and all of this had to be some weird side-effect of being in close quarters to the woman he wanted to shag and couldn’t. There was no future with a woman who lived in a different country and whose whole family belonged on some trashy American talk show. Not to mention that he was never ever going to put himself in that position again. He could never allow himself to be blindsided and betrayed again - especially when the woman in question was already friendly with Wick.

While the others dug into dessert, Jack excused himself to the bathroom, finding that he needed a few moments to be alone with his thoughts. Strolling down the hallway he ran his fingers along the wall, taking in the gallery of photos. Most were of Elizabeth and her family or friends. He chuckled to himself at one of her and Charlie as young teens, skinny and awkward looking, their teeth in braces. Further along, closer to her bedroom door were two framed documents. With some surprise he realised they were diplomas, from Northwestern University. Somehow he’d known in the back of his mind that she’d been to school, something he’d overheard maybe. He hadn’t considered a place like Northwestern, or that ‘gone to school’ meant a Masters degree in History.

He was honestly taken aback. What on earth was she doing working in a bakery with a masters degree? Jack couldn’t wrap his head around it, or around why the hell he cared so much what she did or didn’t do with her life. Splashing his face with water in the bathroom, Jack tried to shake some sense into himself. With a resigned sigh he instead gave into curiosity and opened the bathroom cabinet, all the while telling himself that he was a despicable human being.

“What on earth?” he murmured aloud as he took in the row of prescription bottles on the shelf.

His brow furrowed as he read the labels; Hydroxyzine, Lexapro, Amitriptyline, Naproxen - that one, he knew was for pain. The others though, he had no idea what they were but it didn’t bode well. Whatever was wrong with Elizabeth, she did a good job of hiding it, he’d certainly seen no signs of illness or weakness.

“That was a nice night, even you have to admit Jack.” Tom remarked later as they walked back to the hotel.

“Aye it was. Say, do ye know if Elizabeth is sick or summan?”

“She looked fine to me, a bit tired maybe.”

Jack just shrugged, surely if it were something like say, cancer, Maya would have mentioned something to Tom. Whatever it was it apparently wasn’t bad enough to cause anyone any real concern.

Again, why did he even fucking care?

Short answer, he didn’t. The woman had gotten under his skin, yes but for no reason other than him being horny, wanting to scratch the itch. Anything else was simply sentimentality, maybe a touch of loneliness.

“Nuthun, jus thought she seemed a bit, off, probably jus tried like ye said.”

“Awe how sweet of you to care you big softie.” Tom laughed, despite the dark look that Jack shot him.

“Shut the fuck up, asshole.” Jack muttered, shoving Tom good-naturedly.

As much as Jack hated to admit it, Tom had a point. He did care, despite his better judgement and every argument against it. He cared. Very much.

And he was miserable.

#jack x reader #jack lowden fic #jack lowden #jack lowden blurb #jack lowden fanfiction #jack lowden x reader #pride and prejudice au #dont know why im tagging this since tumblr is being a bitch about links

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