#that page--and like four or five following it--make me ugly cry ngl

[red-elric]

dave who learned imitation as a survival method....... dave getting into turntables and music mixing bc thats the one thing he can do with his bro without getting stressed out, getting into swords and ‘cool guy’ things bc when he acts like his bro and impresses him he gets hurt less, learning to act dry and emotionally disconnected from john bc john is well liked among his friends (and he likes john, too), learning to psychoanalyze by imitating rose because rose will back off if he manages to pick at one of HER sore spots for once....... dave realizing he doesnt want to be that person anymore on the meteor but not having any other method of becoming well-liked. dave imitating romcom protagonists to get karkat’s attention, becoming more and more grumpy and animated and dramatic bc of all the time he’s spent around karkat, dave’s dry humor getting more and more developed as he spends more time with rose and kanaya. dave who has a crisis (at least in another timeline) because at age sixteen he’s standing in his childhood bedroom and surrounded by interests he hasn’t pursued in years and sobbing because he doesn’t know who he is without trying to make someone like him. he doesn’t know which interests, if any, were ones he would have had if he’d grown up with a guardian that didn’t hate him, if the world hadn’t ended and if he wasn’t one of the sole survivors dedicating his childhood to creating a new universe, if he’d just been a normal kid. 

dave, age sixteen, who has no idea who he is or what he wants from life.

(https://www.homestuck.com/story/6306)

#it me #homestuck #dave strider #davekat #to an extent lol #that page--and like four or five following it--make me ugly cry ngl #its like. sixteen year olds have this whole thing about not knowing who they are or what they wanna do ANYWAY #but its much much worse for dave bc of all the trauma #its soooo hard to write him in aus bc like!!!! he's so traumatized in canon!!! #he might have been totally different if hed gotten a happy childhood!!!!! #frankly even the difference between game over timeline and retcon timeline dave is SHOCKING #game over dave is still soo clearly guarded and tense; retcon dave isnt exactly RELAXED but he seems a lot happier #enough that its a stark difference when he finally talks to dirk while still having that convo feel v similar to much earlier dave convos #anyway. love him........