Tumgik
About
Privacy Policy
Removal Request
Visit Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Fun Fact
In February 2021, Tumblr had 518.6 million blog accounts.
#this cross country service is delayed by 26 minutes so i will grab a bucket and start shovelling the water away from the tracks
oatbugs
·
6 months
Text
. anyway after writing the tags 4 this post i told my research partner i will no longer follow his dreams lmao. still helping w it but i need to engage in research that i find satisfying
#i think ive been waiting for something for a while and i will spend the next year waiting for it too
#i thought i felt panic but i have decided to read it as anticipation. the thrill of rejection or of moving forward or the latter as
#a result of the former. i left you with your backpack unattended in the cafe because on fridays i am done
#putting my life on hold for another whim-without-a-warning
#this cross country service is delayed by 26 minutes so i will grab a bucket and start shovelling the water away from the tracks
#everyone is moving on in some different way and im sorry if you think im mean for telling you getting so drunk will disable you from
#recording your brainwaves effectively but it seems like you think i owe you an awful lot. one year ago in four days my friend got me hegel's
#science of logic for my birthday and i thanked him for proving to me the existence of things this is what i do he said
#and then he will spend the rest of his life breathing philosophy and i dont want to spend the rest of my life
#breathing someone elses dreams i wait for the moment of realisation. this is now a 30 minute delay. i was supposed to worship beautiful
#things and that is what i will do. i think i have a best friend and i know i have a lover and i know to
#restrict my love the way you have. im sorry. i hope you understand when i tell you. i am now sitting on the floor in the luggage section of
#this incredibly busy train and i saw a photo of her with her boyfriend and her hair in braids smiling like a fool this is the
#except a week ago you told me you almost took too much this time to live. you are a beautiful girl with a beautiful soul and you know you
#have already changed the world and it somehow was not enough. now you are smiling without any makeup on next to him
#and yesterday you cried in an airport in the states when you were too full of love. this is the most extraordinary human being i have met.
#tomorrow he heads off to princeton while his best friend heads to harvard. he goes there to make the world a better place. he is the most
#extraordinary person i have ever met. the issue with human beings is that we are incredibly good at almost dying and keeping going.
#you try to kill yourself and publish a paper and give a talk. you negotiate the seperation between your own parents and submit another
#phd application. i am surrounded by extraordinary people with extraordinary minds and incredibly broken happy hearts.
#i only see you smile when you talk about robotics. i still dont know how manifolds work and i love the concept anyway. i dont know.
#i do know that i refuse to live unsatisfied.
#you can keep drinking. im going to drink this reality up
#i think i was a horrible person and i refuse to engage with that mentality again no matter what it takes.
9 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
heroesofstar
Star Universe
thatoneelevator
Idk
sorrowseed-blog
SORROWSEED
randomhappeningsofmylife
20-Somethingtrying to figure out life
kilkoico
KilKoiCo