#tho last christmas is a lot better than a hallmark movie

[mcustorm]

45 M/M Gay Movies, Ranked

The other day I bit the bullet and decided to watch Brokeback Mountain for the first time. All I knew about that movie was that it was basically the CMBYN of yesteryear and somebody got killed with a tire iron. Anyways, so I finish the movie and realize that I’ve seen a *lot* of gay movies, especially in the last couple of years. So here are my rankings according to nothing but my personal preference. I won’t write about all of them, but you can ask about something if I leave it out.

I wish I could give you a rubric for this. The reality is, there are some radically different movies on this list with different tones and intentions. There’s buddy comedies, tearjerkers, small indie features, big theater releases. So trying to rank them all is TUFF.

The Way He Looks - Such a beautiful coming-of-age movie. Maybe the 2nd one I saw on this list? Perfect length, perfect characterization, simple yet compelling, clever. And nothing feels better than reaching a happy ending (for once, because some of these movies’ endings-- SHEESH) that’s been earned. It just hasn’t been topped.

2. God’s Own Country

3. Pride

4. Kanarie - Yea, we don’t talk about this movie enough. It’s one of the most recent that I’ve seen. Beautiful. The way that it references apartheid and the war to reflect the protagonist’s feelings? Flawless.

5. Jongens - The first movie that I saw on this list, gets many a bonus point for that.

6. Moonlight - Yes, I am black. Yes, I understand this movie may be too low. Moonlight kind of scares me. In general, there’s not nearly enough discourse surrounding this one for me. But while it’s not exactly a popcorn-muncher, to me it’s the most personal movie on the list. When I look at Chiron and all that he’s been through, I can’t help but draw parallels to my own story up to this point. It holds a mirror up to me in a way that no other movie on this list does. That makes me uncomfortable.

But it is so poetic. Have you guys seen the script for this? The directing, the SOUNDTRACK, the acting. Phenomenal. 

7. Weekend

8. Call Me By Your Name - Yes, I am aware of people’s beef with this one. Yes, I understand a lot of people may feel this one is overrated. While I do think this one gets worse on rewatch, the truth is, it’s not really *that* overrated because hot take: most (meaning over half) of the movies on this list range somewhere from “just okay” to “painstakingly bad”.

It’s the score, the cinematography, the subtext in most all of the dialogue, the acting, the way that you can smell the apricots through the fucking screen. People who say this movie is a vacation ad are fucking CORRECT. One of my biggest gripes however is that it’s too fucking long. And uh, that age difference...

And Armie Hammer’s a weirdo...

9. Dating Amber* - Dating Amber has one of those “Duh” premises that sounds like it could’ve been done like 30 times before yet I can’t think of any other examples of it. So what you’d think would be a wacky premise actually turns out to be a frankly poignant movie with an emotional story arc for the main two characters.

10. Hello Stranger: The Movie* - This movie, which is the first sequel (sorta) on the list, frankly had no business being as good as it was. Even though the web series is required viewing, I felt the movie fixed like all of the series’ issues: pacing, lack of compelling drama, the awkward quarantine format. The drama and stakes are there without us having to visit Angst City. And the theme and the ending reprise is HEAT.

11. Uncle Frank* -  Uncle Frank is like The Help of gay movies. Like The Help, it’s *overall* a short, sweet and fluffy movie set decades ago. Like The Help, you’ll still come out of it feeling pretty good even though it has some dark moments. Also like The Help, you’ll wonder after the fact if the central white girl absolutely needed to be so...well, central for this story to be told. Bonus points for Paul Bettany and Character Actress Margo Martindale.

12. Brokeback Mountain - Tragic.

13. Moffie - Set during the South African border war, same as Kanarie. You even hear the word “moffie” throughout Kanarie. Anyways, this is a war movie for the gays, and a very intense watch. I liked that it was a much more realistic view of what a soldier endured during that period, and of course on the flip side I thought it was more thorough in its depiction of the rampant racism. I gotta find a good book on this era.

14. A Moment In the Reeds

15. Get Real - Maybe the most out of place movie on the list. I need to rewatch it. I do recall absolutely loving the score, however. Like, I fucks with this:

16. Freier Fall - When I finished Brokeback I was like, “Wait, wasn’t that just Free Fall with extra steps?” And yea, it kinda is. But even discount Brokeback is still pretty good.

17. Beautiful Thing - There are few things to like about this one, the relationship between the two guys, the mother’s love for her son even though it’s not all rainbows, that nice little final scene. I did not care for the dark-skinned woman being portrayed as, you know, the drug abusing, school dropout, gossipy, butt of jokes neighbor. But that guy really looks like Tom Holland tho.

18. Love, Simon - It’s at this point that I move from “Yea, that movie is good, you should watch it!” to “Look, you may like it, you may not.”

19. The 10 Year Plan - This movie is so fucking cheesy that there was cheddar coming though my speakers. But when I think of “Hallmark/Lifetime, but for the gays” this is the crown jewel. There’s some other movies on this list that could’ve taken some notes.

20. The Christmas Setup* - The trend of fluffy-white-gay-cable-network-movie continues and in good form. It’s not deep. It’s not really thought provoking. It’s cute. Fran Drescher is there. You should watch it.

21. Giant Little Ones

22. Hidden Kisses

23. Alex Strangelove - In a unique twist, the emotional core of this one is arguably between Alex and his girlfriend. All that ends up happening, however, is we the viewer keep wanting more Alex/Elliott scenes; those are the most electric in the whole movie. The end result is a hot yet endearing mess.

24. Fair Haven

25. The Thing About Harry - Freeform’s attempt at making a cheesy rom-com for the gays. It’s...okay. I personally feel like the main character’s friend is highkey trifling but it’s whatever.

26. Your Name Engraved Herein* - So I guess I’ve decided I officially hate angst. I mean, I get how it’s often necessary to tell an effective story, but I’m just not here for 2 hour indie angst fests that get passed off as “high art” anymore. I cannot do it. Somehow this is Brokeback’s fault...there just has to be a better way to tell gay stories in the 2020′s. Anyways, the last song was fuego.

27. The Perfect Wedding - Easily the most bizarre movie on this list. It’s so bad, I liked it a lot.

28. Naz and Maalik - The first half of the movie with the two leads just riffing is some pretty great stuff. The back half starts throwing plot developments that are just less than interesting.

29. My Best Friend

30. The Curiosity of Chance

31. Being 17 - Boring. Angsty.

32. And Then We Danced

33. Center of My World - Has some of the most trifling characters EVER. I was so angry. This movie for me has *0* rewatchability.

34. Just Friends

35. 4th Man Out - This movie was basically “a bro/Hangover-style movie, but for the gays.” I absolutely love the intention, but the execution was a little shoddy. One day we’re gonna get a flawless movie that nails what this movie was going for. I hope we remember this movie whenever that day comes.

36. Latter Days - So fucking preachy. 

37. GBF - Another bizarre one, but at least this movie gets how wacky it is.

38. Beach Rats

39. Shelter - I’ve noticed a lot of people like this one. To that I say...yikes. Remember that scene from Family Guy where Peter says he doesn’t care for The Godfather? I did not care for Shelter. It insists upon itself (not really, but still).

40. Handsome Devil

41. Esteros - It’s at this point of the list that we shift from “Movies that are the definition of ‘ight’ “ to “These movies are bad. Bad. BAAAAAD.”

42. Monster Pies

43. Were the World Mine - I couldn’t even finish it. Wanna watch a better musical? Go watch Kanarie. Wanna watch a better Shakespeare adaptation? The Lion King is the movie for you, or even fucking She’s the Man.

44. North Sea Texas - So boring. I actually think this one may need a rewatch, because I swear it shouldn’t have been as terrible as it was.

45. Salvation Army - I have no idea what this movie was going for. I understand that it is autobiographical, however...it simultaneously barely has any plot or character developments. This one has shades of Beach Rats, but it’s significantly worse, and I didn’t even like Beach Rats that much.

So that’s it, thanks if you made it down this far. I guess I’ll update the list as I inevitably watch more of these. I would love movie recommendations! 

#lgbtcinema #the way he looks #cmbyn #love simon #thanks for reading #thanks profusely to the gif-makers #i couldn't finish maurice...i'm so sorry #half of these are breaking glass or wolfe #argue with yo mama

[robertsbarbie]

heyyo it’s your secret santa again ❤️💚 happy to hear you liked let it snow! i’ve never read the book, but now i’m curious about it. did you watch dash and lily? that’s also based on a young adult book. it’s funny tho bc i thought the show was better than the book. i just feel like the episode format worked really well. i was hanging on the edge of my seat at the end of each episode. so basically if you haven’t seen it i’m recommending it! and i wanted to know what your fav holiday movies are.

hi 🥰 i have not seen dash and lily yet but i really want to! i love when books are turned into tv shows cause i honestly feel like it helps with the pacing and you get a lot more details that movies would cut. i might start it tonight so we can talk about it but i know i’ve been wanting to just had plans changed at the last minute alakaksjjd

as for movies hmmm i’m a big romcom person in general so i tend to really like those types of movies i even have a favorite hallmark christmas movie cause i’m that lame ✌️🤠 but let’s see, i love the live action grinch and all of those puppet stop animation ones like rudolph and christmas in july and santa claus is coming to town and so on that studio is just so good and i watch those movies at LEAST twice during christmas season, barbie in a christmas carol of course, last christmas (genuinely cried it was so good), and mickey mouse’s twice upon a christmas. i know there’s more but i’m honestly blanking alajaljakajs thank you 🥺💜

#ask: gcwca secret santa

[starrysence]

ralbert for the hc. . thinv. g

ok these are kinda all over the place????? like the ones where theyre not dating yet arent necessarily before the ones where they are dating. its just kinda. scattered. oops sorry 

warnings: 100% swearing. if its ralbert you can basically guarantee that theres swearing

●ok so theres this period of time where nobody can tell whether al and race are dating or just doing bro things like they always do

▪probably bc these two have always been so physically affectionate???? there isnt really a noticeable change after they start dating▪until jack and finch see them making out against a wall and decide to just leave them be without making any noise▪but yeah thats 100% how the boys find out▪"you guys didn't know we were dating????"▪"no wtf you've always acted like a couple we just thought it was the typical Bro Behaviour" ▪they all bust out laughing at that one●race LOVES the snow which is 100% ironic bc he gets cold so easily (can you tell im trying to do as many snow hcs as possible)▪albert doesnt like the snow. he doesnt. understand. race. ESPECIALLY because race gets cold so easily▪"baby why dont you just come inside i can just make hot chocolate and we can binge watch hallmark christmas movies a month too early,,,,,,,"▪"nOo Oo al the snow is so pretty"▪"youre prettier"▪"nice try but im not coming in"▪"aw damn"●has race stolen albert's sweaters during the winter??????? Absolutely ▪has albert cared??? of course not. look at his boy. he looks fucking adorable. he cant take that sweater away from race even tho hes already stolen half the sweaters in al's closet▪one time race was half-asleep on the couch when al got home late from a graphic design workshop and he was in one of albert's sweaters▪al thought it was tje cutest thing hes ever seen▪he didnt want race falling asleep on the couch tho so he Scooped him up and put him down on their bed▪"youre so sweet albie,,,,,,,,, i love you"▪thats the first time either one of them has said i love you since they started dating?????? albert is Shook bc it feels so different now▪"love you too, racer"●these two 100% went through a taylor swift phase together and You Can't Change My Mind▪it includes the ones a lot of people know like shake it off, blank space, etc. but also so many other ones▪they have a whole ass taylor swift playlist but they never really delete it after they get past their phase???▪so al absolutely brings it back when race is going through a breakup▪so here they are. two teenage boys, singing/yelling along to taylor swift songs. ft. like 6 tubs of mint choco chip ice cream and 8 boxes of tissues▪race feels so much better afterwards????▪gives albo a lil kiss on the cheek ▪"thank you, albie"▪albert dasilva? blushing????? pshhhh. nahhh (read: absolutely 100%)●yall Best Believe race can bake like nobody's business and albert Lives For It bc he can barely bake a batch of cookies▪however, the only food race can cook w/o nearly burning something down is italian food▪so usually albert cooks▪but baking???? yall this boy CAN BAKE▪thats actually the reason albert starts falling in love w/ him LMAO ARE U REALLY SURPRISED▪literally theyre like 13 or 14 right? and race has baked a batch of brownies and albert is in HEAVEN when he tries one▪"i think im in love"▪"hahaha with me or the brownies?"▪".....the, uh,,,,, the brownies, duh"▪lol no its race AND the brownies but he doesnt totally know that yet●if youve read my more recent fics u might remember race's sisters▪if noT, he has 4 sisters ok. two older, two younger. he is the middle child. What A Life▪siblings from oldest to youngest: veronica, ilia, race, rosetta, elsie▪albert and race have been best friends since childhood so albert and race's sisters know each other really well. theyre all Pals▪literally???? race's sisters Love Him▪when they find out race likes albert they do not let it go. for a second. race is Actually terrified theyll expose him in fromt of albert one day▪best believe they go WILD when they find out race and al are finally dating ▪the first time albert comes over after theyre dating all 4 of race's sisters TACKLE HIM▪"HELLOOOO FUTURE BROTHER-IN-LAW"▪albert is so absolutely stunned afterwards and race is crying w/ laughter●these two swear. so much. its really funny yall▪once jack dared them to go a whole week without swearing and they didnt realise how hard it would be▪"albert you fu----- fabulous human being, you"▪"stop being such an a----- aDORABLE person, race, my heart cant handle it"▪its actually very wholesome but the week is hell for those two▪the next monday theyre both like "FUCK yes we can fucking swear again thank goodness"▪its a very swear-heavy week to make up for the last one. the boys are Really Amused●race is so full of energy all the time its actually kinda weird for albert to see him tired or drowsy before nighttime▪but he knows if he gives race any form of caffeine or sugar the boy will practically be bouncing off the walls▪so he chooses to enjoy his time w/ sleepy race while it lasts bc while its pretty unusual its also absolutely adorable▪race is even more cuddly than usual when hes tired/sleepy ngl and i mean,,,,,, albert isnt complaining▪al lives for the lil smile race has on his face when hes tired and albert has just kissed his forehead or something. its so cute he swears hes gonna explode●albert is Wonderful at poetry yall cant try me on this i will take it to my grave▪race has no idea about this until they have to write a poem for english▪very open-ended assignment. a poem of any style about anything you want to write about▪albert says his is about one of the best gifts hes ever received and it turns out▪the poem is abt race▪and its REALLY well written half the class is saying 'awwww' and the other half is near tears and smiling▪race is part of the other half. except he starts crying. did i mention hes emotional as hECK●shsjjfjgs amusement park dates▪these boys live for them (also i rlly just want an excuse to write about amusement park dates)▪kind of chaotic bc race bruises really easily AND hes really clumsy so if he and al have to part ways for a bit he might look like shit when they reconvene and albert is like "do i have to fight somebody or did you just do something dumb and get yourself hurt again"▪"........the latter"▪"jesus christ, race. youre such a disaster. but i love you"▪"love you too albieeeeee"

×××

sahjkhdks i love them so much. i think i got a bit carried away with all of these lmaooo so i hope you like them!!

-sanj 💕

tag list:

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@one-candy-cane-please​

@suddenly-im-respecsable​

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@bencookisagod​

@well-the-kids-do-too​

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#newsies #newsies live #newsies 1992 #race higgins #racetrack higgins #albert dasilva #ralbert #sanj scribbles

[andrewsneil]

aesthetic, balaclava, champagne, cold, dance, frozen, green, hallmark, nog, read, travel (i am sorry, i know that's a lot but I am a curious bitch, feel free to answer just some of them) Hope you have amazing holidays!

thank u for the ask !!!!! no need to apologise for sending me a lot of qs i love having an excuse to talk a stupid amount <3 uno reverse i hope u have a great time too !!

aesthetic - describe your ideal winter aesthetic.

i wanna freeze my arse off but like. indoors. in front of a proper coal fire, except my house doesn’t have a chimney anymore so that’s impossible. also sledding !!! god i used to love doing that as a kid it was my absolute fave. just. a white christmas. we simply don’t get them in england and i think it’d be magical

balaclava - do you like wearing hats? what’s your go-to?

ok i’m not a big hat wearer, sometimes i do that cute lil look where you wear a beanie and then have your hair in two buns. imo i look at least 30% more gay when i do my hair like that, but i don’t even brush my hair the majority of the time so. it’s a lot of effort and i really cba. plus i hate the way my head looks in a hat when my hair’s like. down. so i sort of like wearing a hat, usually a beanie. i go through phases where i forget hats exist for at least eight months and then i exclusively wear a hat every time i leave the house for a solid two weeks and then. repeat. very draining cycle

champagne - do you do anything special for new year’s eve?

i usually just get shit faced and then pass out in my bed. one time i mixed it up and slept in my bathroom but u know. same deal. i feel like in the uk at least. when you don’t enjoy clubbing (and since being able to legally go out - bc i couldn’t get away w going out before i turned 18 for a lot of reasons - i’ve been out a grand total of twice bc i have awful anxiety which is either. better or worse when i’m drunk) and don’t have ??? any irl friends there’s absolutely fuck all to do on new year’s. honestly i’ll probably watch spider-man and hang out w my cat so. nothing special

cold - what is the best movie marathon?

OKAY if we’re talking christmas film marathons, my favourite is the santa clause trilogy, BUT in terms of like. films everyone likes, home alone is usually a safe bet bc everyone loves to see grown men cry. tho i hate the newest one. BUT if we’re talking non christmas movie marathons too?? i feel like i legally have to say hp, it takes abt 19 and a half hours but it’s doable. tho not a lot of people want to sit and watch 19 hours of telly w me, esp not harry potter. i’ve been watching the hobbit trilogy a LOT recently. i’ve always preferred lotr but idk. maybe it’s my soft spot for found family’s or maybe it’s the fact that i like dragons but isk

dance - what’s your favorite winter or christmas song?

ok don’t @ me i’m not the biggest fan of christmas music it’s all a little bit shit but i like last christmas by wham and do they know it’s christmas? by bandaid but other than that??? choke

frozen - do you have a favorite Christmas movie?

YES ok the santa clause but specifically the second one it’s so so so good. literally perfection. one of my favourite films of all time is a nightmare before christmas but. i like to argue that it’s NOT a christmas film just because it pisses people off when i say that

green - what are some green flags when it comes to a partner?

bestie idk how to answer this i’ve been in three relationships, one when i was like. twelve and felt obligated to choose a guy to like except he did the same thing and chose me so we awkwardly dated for eight months and never held hands the entire time, my second relationship was at fifteen and lasted a total of three months, but he was a “i’m gonna say ily on the second day of dating and also threaten to k word myself if we ever argue” type of guy and. the last relationship is recent and also not very healthy but. green flags??? literally just being peter parker idk x yes. he’s canonly a leo. no i don’t think that’d work bc i’m an aries and a relationship between two fire signs can be very messy but. i’d make it work for him and i have deluded myself into thinking we’re compatible 😐

hallmark - do you like cheesy holiday movies?

already answered this one but sort of !!!!!

nog - what’s your opinion on egg nog?

honestly we don’t have egg nog in the uk like. i’ve never tried it but ??? google just says it’s like. milk and alcohol??? or. eggy milk and alcohol? i don’t think i’d be a fan i fucking hate milk and also google says it usually uses like. rum or bourbon and i’m a little bitch and exclusively drink vodka so 😔

read - what’s your favorite book you’ve read this year?

HFJSKA no bc i was hoping someone would ask me this ok. so as good as dead by holly jackson was up there. so fucking well written, esp in displaying the main character’s ptsd, like. just everything was perfect abt it Except the ending. i reread the magicians nephew (c.s. lewis) back when i was hyperfixating on narnia really bad and i forgot how much i loved that book hfjska but. ultimately it probably has to be anyway the wind blows by rainbow rowell. i had a half an hour long panic attack after finishing it just. bc of how emotionally attached i was to the trilogy, and for abt a month after i’d read it i swear i had a ??? hole in my chest from like. the fact that i’d read the book and it was there and finished and i’d never experience reading it the first time again. but yes probably awtwb

travel - if you could travel anywhere for the holidays were would you go?

literally just anywhere w snow. as a kid i spent one christmas in darbyshire and it was lovely. ngl i have suppressed most of my memories from my childhood, plus i was probably like. four so it’s kinda hazy anyway but !!! snow <3 i just fucking love snow idk

send me winter asks !!

#uncrownedqueeen #answered