#tom and jerry style attempts to kill/prank each other every day

[just-late-roman-republic-things]

Guys, I just thought of a terrible, hilarious alternate history plot:

Make Octavian a couple years younger, stab Caesar as usual, and whoops Antony is now legally responsible for the world's evilest 15-year-old. Will Antony embezzle Octavian's inheritance? Will Octavian murder Antony without getting caught? Will Fulvia drag Antony, Octavian, Cicero, Brutus, and Cassius into the world's most awkward dinner party, which is of course crashed by Dolabella?? Not to mention Agrippa, Maecenas and Salvidienus embarrassing Antony in public with the pranks only bored teenagers can invent!

I need a sitcom where instead of the War of Mutina/Liberators' War we get Julian family drama 30 years early, Cicero and the conspirators live, and maybe, just maybe, the republic gets back on track. Mainly because Antony and Octavian are too busy hassling each other for either to fight Brutus and Cassius.

(Excerpt from Julius Caesar and the Roman People, by Robert Morstein-Marx, p. 566)

#jlrrt reads #hey new fanfic au #octavian #mark antony #julius caesar and the roman people #robert morstein-marx #alternate history #for bonus points imagine that for some reason antony and octavian literally have to live together #idk maybe they claimed the same house from caesar's will and both refuse to leave #tom and jerry style attempts to kill/prank each other every day #there's buckets of dye and pies involved #both of them complain about the other to lepidus but neither lets him get a word in edgewise