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#whatever. if any of yall are in the hivemind jane or quadeca discord i MIGHT still post stuff there. but otherwise ill keep to myself and m
fleouriarts
·
7 months
Text
feeling bad about my art lately. will probably not post for a while. but i wanted to at least dump some stuff here before i retreat into my hidey hole
#hivemind tv
#riley savage
#graydon weaver
#hmfcu
#quadeca
#jane remover
#eden burke
#my art
#2023
#fanart
#doodles
#its like. augh. longtime fleouriarts followers are familiar with my eternal tango with posting art online
#doing this since i was 11 has like rotted my brain and made me rely wayyyy too much on external validation to motivate myself
#and every year or so it gets bad enough that i take a break. but the break usually only lasts a month before i miss the feeling
#and come back and then the cycle repeats
#its probably worse now bc this is a fandom where getting seen by the creators is not really that hard
#so there have been times where im like 'well idk if i wanna draw this. but if i do maybe hivemind will rt it :-)'
#NO!!! THATS NOT WHAT ART IS ABOUT!!!!! i cant keep letting myself get addicted to the numbers going up man i gotta get out of here
#and i was reading a quad interview from around when idmthy got released. cus hes also brain poisoned like this. but he managed to get out
#and now just kinda comes online to release music and then leave
#i need to be like that. i need to take a break from art posting thats so long that i come back as a changed man odysseus style
#idk. its been so long since i drew stuff that no one gets to see but me. all the art i keep to myself is just out of embarrassment
#i need to relearn how to draw stuff just for the love of creation and not “maybe people online will like this one”
#or “this new thing came out i need to prove my love of it by drawing it”
#sometimes it leads to good art but more often than not it just makes me feel worse
#whatever. if any of yall are in the hivemind jane or quadeca discord i MIGHT still post stuff there. but otherwise ill keep to myself and m
#friends for a while i think
#woooooo this is queued to post while im in orgo lab everyone wish me luck with my thin layer chromatography
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