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therealchrisclem · 4 years
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Corporate America w/ Chris Clem https://audioboom.com/posts/7548841-corporate-america-w-chris-clem
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therealchrisclem · 4 years
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Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker thoughts
I have seen Star Wars: Episode 9 - Rise of Skywalker. I wasn’t going to share my opinion, but it’s not everyday I get to go to a press screening for one of the most anticipated films ever made (of course, hype being what it is, doesn’t mean as much as it did in 1999), so why not try to get some of my thoughts across? 
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A few things first - I’m not a critic. I was told a long time ago you can either be someone that does things or someone that criticizes them, but in order to treat either with the respect it deserves, you need to delineate that line clearly. I still work on my scripts and writing packet, I don’t see my self becoming an actual cultural critic of any kind in the future. This is just my views on this film as a guy who loves movies and really, really loves Star Wars. Secondly, Lucasfilm and Disney asked us not to spoil any of the movie, and while I don’t think that’s possible in a macro sense (do you honestly think the good guys lose?), I will try to respect their marketing wishes. There are some things in this movie that were incredibly shocking. Not enough of them for my taste though. 
Finally, I liked The Last Jedi. Was it flawed? Yes. Did the humor in it fit with the rest of the series? No. The humor coming from actual jokes is about as far away from George Lucas comedy like Jar Jar and farting space camels as you can get. It’s actually one of the biggest reasons why I think some fans didn’t think it was really “star wars-y.” Despite it’s issues, that movie introduced new concepts and themes and pushed the series forward in a way that The Force Awakens (which I liked better overall) didn’t, and the spin-offs Rogue One (which I thought was great but unnecessary) and Solo (which I hated more than any other Star Wars movie I saw in theaters, even Attack of the Clones) didn’t. I waited my whole life for new Star Wars because I wanted new Star Wars, not retreads playing in the OT’s bathwater. 
A side-note for a second: I used to always leave my takes on the big blockbuster movies I saw on Facebook. I realized, while ruminating on this movie during the afternoon that I stopped doing that a few years ago. Looking back, it was The Last Jedi that caused that break. I argued so much with friends and family over that movie that I must have decided at some point it wasn’t even worth sharing my opinions on social media. In terms of big budget cinema (I said it) I can’t think of anything as divisive. At least when it came to Batman V Superman, it was so overwhelmingly negative that I don’t remember the lovers of that movie feeling the need to justify it. Or maybe it’s just that social media is overwhelmingly toxic or that our culture in general is sick. I dunno, I’m not writing a Sociology thesis paper here. Back to Rise of Skywalker:
My sister Abby informed me last week that I was going to get to go to this press screening as my brother-in-law Leo’s plus one (he works in the industry) as an early Christmas gift. I was so excited and happy, I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to get to see the conclusion of my favorite movie series of all time over two days before paying audiences got to! I was pretty much buzzing on a tibana gas high all week. This is why I moved to LA! (Yes, I know that Tibana gas doesn’t get you high. Spice does. Let me mangle these EU references like Solo.) 
The El Capitan Theater in Hollywood is a historical building I’ve always wanted to see a movie at, and what could be better to see than the END OF THE SKY-WALKER SAGA? (Well, Avengers: Endgame*, for starters.) Despite how small and cramped the seats were (humans my size did not exist in the 1930s), my anticipation couldn’t have been higher. I even had my complimentary bucket of popcorn and my free Coke Zero Sugar like the paid off Disney shill I am. The theater darkened, the Lucasfilm logo shone, and we were taken back to a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…
I’m just gonna get blunt here. It’s impossible for me to say Rise of Skywalker is anything other than a disappointment. I have felt upset and angry after seeing a Star Wars movie (Solo). I have tried to convince myself I loved what I just watched after seeing a Star Wars movie (The Phantom Menace). I have never felt as indifferent about what I’ve seen after I left a Star Wars movie as I did today. And this was something I was really, really, looking forward to.
I promised no spoilers, so here’s my best attempt: The movie is at least 2 movies in one, crammed together at a breakneck pace that is basically held together by the charisma of the actors and the beauty of the special effects shots. The movie looks and feels like a proper Star Wars. I just can’t think of a time where I left a two and a half hour movie and thought it could have used 15 minutes more of exposition. It’s not like it doesn’t make sense, but nothing’s explained and you’re either on board or not. There’s an important character moment that gets brought up repeatedly and never resolved or mentioned after the climax starts. Things happen and exist and this movie doesn’t have the time to tell you why. The pacing is a mess. It is a ton of movie. Hope your eyes are able to keep up. There are also lots of groan-inducing moments and scenes that aren’t enough to ruin the movie but definitely pushed my goodwill to the breaking point.
If you hated The Last Jedi, I have a feeling you’ll be much happier with this. It turns that entire movie into a steaming pile of bantha poo-doo. There are still some things from that movie that resurface, but this movie does a better job honoring the prequels than it does it’s direct fore-bearer. (Seriously, this movie does some heavy lifting to make sure the prequels are connected to the rest of the series in a way George Lucas himself never bothered to do. Despite hating a lot of the prequels, it’s pretty cool.)
And that’s not to say it’s all bad! The action is so, so great, the effects are on another level, the stuff that is good is really good! There are iconic shots throughout that I could have seen on a poster hanging on my ten-year-old bedroom wall. The classic iconography is exalted in Rise of Skywalker. Once it switches from the “first movie” to a Force Awakens-style redux of Return of the Jedi, it’s pretty awesome. I love BB-8, and more that will have to wait for spoiler talk.
It’s never boring or hard to watch either. Plus, having John Williams finish out this series ensures it always sounds like Star Wars. What a gem.
So that’s it.
A mixed bag. 
After all the hype, after all this time, after all the money Disney spent devouring our childhoods and pop culture, that’s all this movie is. Honestly, I was hoping for a lot more. And maybe that will reveal itself when I see it again Thursday night. Even if it doesn’t, I’m still happy it exists. This sequel trilogy (for all its faults) is more than I could have ever hoped for as a child.
I can’t wait until everyone sees it and we can talk about the plot and argue about the movie online until we all hate each other again.
*This movie’s pacing made me appreciate the work the Russo brothers did on Infinity war and Endgame so much. It was a harder task than this movie, and they did it so easily I forgot what a near impossible task that must have been. Honestly, the MCU is really the Star Wars of our time. Don’t shoot me.
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therealchrisclem · 4 years
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I tried to drink coffee with my Infinity Gauntlet on and I flew way too close to the sun here. #Marvel #InfinityGauntlet #CoffeeTime (at Los Angeles, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/B5vtM42p6q0/?igshid=193oau2wbwjc8
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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Underground legend the Ultimate Jizzer gets interviewed by Tony Schiavone live at Starrcast #whwmonday Full video here: https://youtu.be/nqZ_GTDHDBA (at Starrcast) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bozh9qtgsGo/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1hwpq0lmx1ej
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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Underground legend the Ultimate Jizzer gets interviewed by Tony Schiavone live at Starrcast #whwmonday (at Starrcast) https://www.instagram.com/p/BozhUvOgUHf/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1k2xi623zeh0x
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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Shout out to the #WhiteSox Organ player for bringing Greg Allen up to the plate to Billy Joel's Allentown last night. #GoTribe (at Guaranteed Rate Field)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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Making my court enforced return to the @funnystopcomedyclub next week to headline with my great friend @marv_conner. Probably gonna do some character stuff on the late shows and burn down Cuyahoga Falls Saturday night if that sounds up your alley. FunnyStop.com for tickets or 330-923-4700 for reservations. (at Funny Stop Comedy Club)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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I don't think they can win the #Finals, but honestly, I don't even care. Feeling lucky to be at my parents house this weekend so I could go through my old basketball cards and remember when I just hoped and wished that one day the Cavs could make the finals. We got to see them win the title in 2016 and it was truly the greatest sports moment ever. It's been a great weekend and tonight just capped it off perfectly. Sports don't matter in the grand scheme of things but there's nothing wrong with finding joy in them and just savoring the moment. Whether there's 4 more games or 7, I'll be doing exactly that. #GoCavs (at Stow, Ohio)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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I'll be at the regionally famous™️ @funnystopcomedyclub this weekend with @marv_conner and @joshvolchko, pretty sure if you call and say anything they'll give you free tickets. (at Funny Stop Comedy Club)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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My wife made this, if you want to know what a successful marriage looks like. #Cavs (at Andersonville)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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October 2008 by @abigailclem #OldHeadshotDay (at Stow, Ohio)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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Back home from #WrestleMania. Another amazing time with some great friends. New Orleans is an expensive city. Expensive, but fun. Can't wait to get back to NY (really NJ) next April! #KOQ (at Andersonville)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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READY FOR MANIA! (at Mercedes-Benz Superdome)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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The #KOQ rides again! (Might be our best outfits yet, too!) (at Bourbon Street, French District)
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therealchrisclem · 6 years
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Chris Clem’s Cavs Cast #118 - 3/6/18 https://audioboom.com/posts/6709816-chris-clem-s-cavs-cast-118-3-6-18
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therealchrisclem · 7 years
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LWP #57 WCW Best of Nitro (TNT Special aired 1998) Chris Clem’s Personal VHS copy/NXT Brooklyn III recap/SummerSlam 2017 preview https://audioboom.com/posts/6221723-lwp-57-wcw-best-of-nitro-tnt-special-aired-1998-chris-clem-s-personal-vhs-copy-nxt-brooklyn-iii-recap-summerslam-2017-preview
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therealchrisclem · 7 years
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Main Show EPISODE 192: Jeremy Sheer, Chris Clem, Tabitha Jones & Ghost of Sean’s Grandpa https://audioboom.com/posts/5950889-main-show-episode-192-jeremy-sheer-chris-clem-tabitha-jones-ghost-of-sean-s-grandpa
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