witherhartdaily
Witherhart Daily
Daily news for the people of Witherhart, supplied by none other than your beloved E.L. Crowther!
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11/20/2023
The police station allowed me one phone call, except I didn't actually have anyone to call so I'm writing a news report instead. It's calming.
Today it's raining up. There is rain in the ground and it is flying up towards the atmosphere. I wonder if my cell will have windows so I can still see the weather.
I have been informed that I am not being arrested. Yet. The police keep commenting on my appearance however. Something about long fingernails. They're not that long. Don't believe them.
Good moondown.
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11/19/2023
Witherhart residents, it is with utmost candid and regretful feelings with which I inform you:
The police are at my door.
Again, it is most unwise to be telling you this, however this is the news and no secret is safe from prying eyes. #freeELCrowther anyone?
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11/18/2023
I was able to escape the forest. But I feel... strange. Sick, maybe. I have a feeling grabbing handfuls of potentially toxic berries wasn't a good idea?
Still, it's refreshing to get back to my news posting. Today the weather is rain. Just regular rain. All day. Rain, rain, rain. What fun!
The Witherhart autumn festival is soon. I've always thought it was weird that it was held closer to winter than autumn, but some people say that the festival isn't actually for autumn itself, but rather for the transition between autumn and winter. I don't know, if any Witherhart autumn festival enthusiasts out there want to correct me, then feel free.
I still can't shake this strange feeling...
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11/16/2023
There's something in these woods with me. I don't know where exactly, but I know it's following me. I can't find the edge of the forest anymore. Readers, if this is my last post, tell Willow she can keep the gramophone for as long as it lets her. I leave all of my CDs to her too. Willow, I know you never really liked Will Wood, but I think if you just gave it another chance-
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11/15/2023
I tried to go back to the forest today, but I was caught by the police. After far to many questions they let me go with a warning. I probably shouldn't be broadcasting this information on a public news source... um, oops.
This is but a minor setback. I'm returning tomorrow. I have to know what's causing the disappearances.
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11/14/2023
Today the sun is beating down a healthy amount of radiation. That being said, keep in mind that our local village overlords warn against spending more that 5 hours at a time in the sun. It is terribly difficult to clean skin off of concrete.
Today I snuck out to do some more investigations. Running past some impaled and screaming trees, I found a small wooden shelter in the woods. Nobody was inside, though I did find rations and what looks to be a spellbook. I'll have to keep an eye on it.
Good moondown.
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11/13/2023
Today on the way home from the market I was attacked by a lion-seal hybrid. That reminds me, the lion-seal hybrids have escaped from the local experimentational facilities. Please be careful, as these hybrids have shown a strong taste for human flesh... I wonder how long until they demand sacrifices?
Five more people have gone missing in the woods. I went to go have a look for myself, but all I could was that someone had been putting nails and staples into the trees. I never understood why people did that. How can they handle the tree's screams?
I'll do more investigation and keep you all updated. Good moondown, all. Stay safe.
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11/12/2023
I don't know about you, residents of Witherhart, but something tells me today is going to be a great day as long as we disregard the strange noises coming from the woodlands. No matter how akin to human voices they sound like, remember that these creatures are not people and you should not listen to them.
Prices on antique items rise as locals find themselves trapped in an "artifact craze". Whether this fervour for haunted items is supernaturally caused or just the latest Witherhart trend is unknown, but between you and me, I just like them because they're cool. I tried to interview a strange woman I found in an antique shop but she just kept ranting about Canada, which is very strange considering Canada is an inhabitable wasteland as of 50 years ago. Very curious. I'll keep you readers updated. Good moondown, all.
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11/11/2023
Make sure to bring your umbrellas today as trusted resources tell me that it is going to rain both cats AND dogs. Please remember that any wild animals that fall from the sky are not legally adoptable and will melt within a 48-hour time period, so it's best to not get attached.
We've got results from the monthly Witherhart sports poll. 65% of fans report that tennis is the best sport due to its "tangy, sort of tart flavor". I will take this time to once again remind Witherhart residents that overdosing on sports can be extremely fatal! Consume responsibly.
I saw that three-eyed deer again. Maybe the species is returning after migration? Or maybe this one just likes me. She's caused me no harm so I've allowed her to stay.
That is all for today. Good moondown!
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An Introduction.
Salutations to all residents of Witherhart. Humans. Animals. That three-eyed deer I saw on the side of the road with foraging. I couldn't help but notice that our lovely little village has no news outlet, and what good village doesn't have a trustworthy source for information on all the happenings? Fear not, readers. I, E.L. Crowther, will step up to the post. You're all stuck with me forever whether you like it, unlike my wife who left me after I kept "wasting" "money" on "useless" "items". I never forgot that, Willow. I'm still expecting you to return the gramophone you stole. Until it returns itself...
I digress. Check in daily for the news! Unless I go missing under mysterious circumstances. In that case refer to section 5 of my "Incase I Go Missing Under Mysterious Circumstances" file for funeral arrangements.
Good moondown, all. Please remember to close all curtains.
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