xoyalanztov

[xoyalanztov]

Mr Bonzo isn’t an alternate reality Mr Blobby, he is the not!them and has erased Mr Blobby from existence

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Reading anything horror after listening to the Magnus Archives is a trip. The solutions seem so clear. Creepy child-murdering ghost in basement? Cement. Animated bones? Cement. Woman coming out of fireplace where she was burned to death? Cement. Talk about a concrete solution.

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(grabbing your face) do you remember simon fairchild's statement about how he became an avatar. how he fell and the sky embraced him. i think about it all the time. how it would feel to be embraced by the vast. the entity that is about how you are insignificant before the endless void, holding you. the fact that being an avatar of the vast means loving a contradiction: you are insignificant and the entity of the vastness of everything else holds you in its embrace and takes away your mortality.

i wonder if when simon told that one guy enjoy sky blue if the reason he laughed while saying it was because he was sharing his own joy. if in his own way he wasn't being generous, sharing the experience that changed him forever. i wonder if as much as he spreads terror, maybe what he really wanted was to share that experience, and that's why he picked someone who loves sky-diving, someone who was also in love with the sky.

i wonder if that guy who was eaten by the sky isn't out there now, saying the sky held him gently in the huge jaws of endless blue, and he cried with joy as he understood. if what for his mother was a horrible experience that killed her son, for him wasn't the liberation from his mortal life and worries before the realization that we are nothing.

i wonder if simon was afraid, too, before he was in love or while he was in love with it, if he can even distinguish his love for the vast from his fear from it or it's just another facet of his adoration, something he can offer to it, if when he said he loved the sky he meant it like that, like we often love a god, with fear as strong as our adoration.

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literally my favourite thing about lena kelley that keeps being proven again and again as the series continues: she does not give a fuck and is just doing her job. no morals. no plans. no personality. go girl, give us less than nothing. cannot find it within me to believe she's the big bad when she's literally an empty shell of a person repeating someone else's lines back at the person she used to be. she is nothing. she's everything to me.

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Okok not to compare TMA and TMAGP but the parallels of Jon's entire life being one elaborate ploy to get him to The Magnus Institute and the Institute not even wanting Sam???? Diabolical.

#tmagp ep 13 #real talk tho is this because he scored rlly high on the empathy index for the trials?? #samama khalid #sam khalid #tmagp #jon sims #jonathan sims

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reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something

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i think this is worse than the mr bonzo coquette edits

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Thanks for that one Alex

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Just listened to it. I think I'm going to go take a very long shower and make sure my skin stays on my bones.

I have not listened to TMAGP 12 yet but I think it's ridiculous to hate Bonzo with the same passion one hates Leitner. Hate Nigel Dickerson guys. Come on.

#tmagp #mr bonzo #bonzo bonzo bonzo #bonzo #bonzo tmagp

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[xoyalanztov]

Watcher (and why nothing matters anymore):

So, in case you've been locked away under a proverbial bridge for a few days, Internet personalities Steven Lim, Ryan Bergara, and Shane Madej (known as Watcher) have elected to begin their own streaming service and ditch YouTube.

On the surface, that mightn't even seem like news at all.

After all, this sort of thing seems to happen all the time: The Try Guys left Buzzfeed to create their own company, Rhett and Link took the dive and diversified into paywalled entertainment a few years back with Mythical Society. Both of which however still rely on YouTube itself to generate views on the main channels, which funnel viewers into a FOMO type situation where "you can't miss" a special airing on the app (Mythical Society) or Patreon (Try Guys).

Watcher, in its infinite wisdom (stupidity, carelessness, unparalleled greed - take your pick) has decided that YouTube is pointless, and has moved ALL their content behind a paywall, claiming that the service was amping up to provide "TV quality programming", leaving only old content and the first episodes of the new shows up on their YouTube page as a subtle tease as to what you could get for $6/month.

It's now quite apparent from reading the comments section of their (now infamous) YouTube video, their official subreddit, and the tag on X that the fans were...not thrilled. The fingers began to be pointed within minutes. Name calling soon after. Then this blossomed into dissertations on why this was a horrible idea.

Then we found out that there was no app. Just a website. So you're paying for website access. Not a full blown streaming service to rival Netflix. Oh, and they don't even have their own servers, the videos are hosted by Vimeo. The deeper the comments section dug, the nastier the attacks got. Steven soon became the whipping boy. His past, his interviews, scanned and mercurially dug up for juicy tidbits (although all anyone gleaned from these was he's rich, was born rich, drives a Tesla in LA, likes fancy food, and has friends whom he values who are racist and possibly sexist and will not sever ties with them).

Then came the cries of incongruity. Shane Madej repeatedly said to "Eat the Rich", and here he was schilling for a platform that cost $6 a month. The cries began to pirate all of the new Watcher content because maybe he was under duress and was secretly telling them to do so. Fact is, I don't know if he was or what, but I'm certain he's under contract and wants his job.

Then came the videos from other internet users analyzing the video, and comparing this to the Try Guys situation with Ned a few months back. Both are disasters, each in unique ways with different players, and such like but here's the vast difference: none of this will even matter in a month.

Let me explain: We are in the total free fall stage of Watcher's Internet Streamer Service. What they do in the next 24-48 hours is crucial. If they revert back to their YouTube channel and apologize, they'll be fine. People will probably poke fun at them, but they'll be forgiven, eventually. But if they don't and they keep on, ignoring the fans, dousing the haters, and make it a month, I doubt we will see any resistance outside of a terse article or two.

Why? The collective memory span in this day and age is extremely short, many have likely already made judgment in their head and have passed said judgment. Therefore, they'll avoid the channel, and the streamer and will be blissfully unaware of any changes. Those who have joined up and paid will remain members, and those who have elected to remain subscribed will likely remain so and will watch the free content until they can afford the $6/month.

The thing is like it or hate it, if they decide to do nothing and ignore the public at large, they most likely will be fine. Maybe they will not have the hugest subscriber base, but people will forget about this. Something else major that is more salacious will spring up in the months ahead. Will there be lingering anger? Sure, but like I said before, these people have already passed judgment so they're already gone.

In an era of "nothing fucking matters" when your choices are sometimes entirely out of your direct control and are (at best) two sides of the same coin, it should be of absolutely no surprise to anyone that there is a fairly good possibility even after all that has transpired that nothing bad will happen. Lest we forget that old adage: "there is no such thing as bad PR".

Personally, I feel $6 is a tad much for a non-app based web streamer with little to no content. It was disingenuous to announce its launch internationally where even more people can't afford it, and some can't even view it. Steven wasn't upfront with who was in charge and now it really does seem like he's using the subscriptions to fund his international gallivanting. It's clear nobody wanted TV-show quality Ghost Files to take place in another country, nor did they want an old show revived with votes when you pay the first month's dues. They say it's a case of Watcher "not reading the room".

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Mr Bonzo, on his own, is basically an okay creepypasta. Children's TV show mascot is a murderous monster? Boring.

TMAGP elevates it a little by framing it the way it does; it's no longer just about Mr Bonzo being creepy but in how the creation controls the creator's life - I'm sure lots of famous creators can relate (although less to the murder). Even on minor levels, it's easy to become the guy who did that one thing once.

But it becomes TRULY inspired when we find out that Mr Bonzo is effectively some sort of government hitman. It's so fucking absurd but so brilliant.

Imagine if Slenderman got dead drops from the CIA. Fucking Jeff the Killer receiving orders from his Jeff the Handlers to Jeff the Kill a union boss.

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you know what would be awful, if gerry got to talk to jon while he's in a computer just like jon talked to gerry when he was in a book. something something sources of information something something they'll never be able to be friends

#thank you for ruining my day op

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Been thinking about this tweet ALL morning.

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breathing heavily, loosely tied up in red string as if I have been whirling wildly with a ball of yarn in my hand. jack. jack? jack like... jack barnabas? famed coffee shop employee and brief boyfriend of agnes montague? jack, being referenced by celia, who saw a fire ghost of a woman that one time? here's how agn--I can't even say it, I'm too sick with longing.

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STUPID IDIOT MOTHERFUCKING MR BONZO GODDAMN DISGUSTING PIECE OF VILE SWEATY SAGGY RUBBERY PUFFY SKIN COQUETTISH POSH BASTARD BIGGEST CLOWN WORST MASCOT SHITTEST COLOUR SCHEME HORRIBLE SHAPE MOTHERFUCKING MR BONZO IF HE CAME FOR ME I WOULD MUTALISE MYSELF SO HE DOESN'T GET THE SATISFACTION I WOULD DISSOLVE MYSELF IN ACID OR FEED MYSELF TO THE OCEAN SO I DON'T HAVE TO DIE BY HIS HANDS IF HE CAME FOR ME I WOULD BREAK HIM WITH MY BARE HANDS I WOULD RIP HIS RUBBERY SKIN APART AND HIS SKIN WOULD BURST LIKE THE WORST KIND OF WATER BALLOON I WOULD BECOME MORE OF A MONSTER THAN HIM IF IT MEANS KILLING HIM MOTHERFUCKING RUBBERY PIECE OF UNTWINKABLE SWEATY CLOWN MR FUCKING WANTS TO STAY WITH HIS STUPID HAT HIS UGLY FUCKING HAT I HOPE IT BURNS I HOPE HE BURNS AND THE SMELL OF BURNING RUBBER WILL BE A SYMPHONY FOR MY SENSES TO MARK THE DAY MOTHERFUCKING MR BONZO FINALLY DIES

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i lied abt only posting abt this situation once, i just saw this lovely person’s comment!! passing it on to tumblr 🫡

edit: SOMEONEE changed the password and ruined it for everybody :/ pls try this version instead!!