zihaaaa

[zihaaaa]

All of that overthinking. It turns from hope to patience to despair and back again. You can’t shake it off no matter how many prayers and how many sleepless nights you’ve endured. Pleading. Trapped. Thinking why me. But you know those thoughts aren’t worth it. You know it doesn’t change anything. You know it could be worse. But you’re still stuck. Thoughts change to action. But that’s fruitless too. You’re running out of time. The world is passing you by. And you’re still stuck. Takes a while before you realize you’re Yunus and your mind is your whale. La illaha inta anta, subhanaka. Innee kunta min a'thalameen. That’s all you really have. Feelings of paralysis change to that of possibility. Knowing you will move again. But right now, this is where you are. Your world is on pause, but you’re mentioning the name of the Eternal. Though you’re not moving, your soul is transcending. If God didn’t love you, He’d give you every distraction in the world. But you’re here, and there is no better place.

#ah #the supplication that truly changed my life #really got me in my feels subhanAllah

[zihaaaa]

Contentment is found in what you already have. Feel and hold onto those blessings. They are beautiful gifts that may not always be around.

Optimism is found in what you're seeking. An endless feeling of possibility that you should hold onto till your last breath. Regardless of your surroundings. A dreamer will always try to transcend their difficulties and refuse to be defined by them.

Gratitude is found in the unexpected results of your efforts. Feeeling serenity towards God's plan. Acknowledging your powerlessness. He loves you enough to write a story in your name.

[zihaaaa]

Oh Ramadan, I miss you already.

[zihaaaa]

1 3 6

1. What is it you love doing the most and why?

Answered! :)

3. What was the last thing you listened to and how did it make you feel?

I listened to my most favorite Qur’an recitation from my most favorite reciter, Surah Az-Zumar - Idris Abkar. I have probably listened to this recitation every time I’ve messed up, as we all do, or just needed to feel that absolute comforting closeness to Allah. Ayah 53…it just makes my heart tremble with gratitude and love and hope at His beautiful, infinite Mercy. :’)

6. If you could change one thing in the world right now, what would it be?

To somehow stop the endless divisiveness within Muslim communities? There is so much that is wrong in this world, and I believe if Muslims lifted other Muslims up instead of tearing them down, we could do so much good inshaAllah. And this is not unfeasible. We can do this, me and you. In our own communities and in our own interactions. It all starts with one person.  

#thanks for the asks! :)

[zihaaaa]

Also 24!

24. What is the best gift someone got you?

 My family got me tajweed classes to improve my tajweed! Best. Gift. Ever. :’)

Thank you so much for all the asks, not so anon haha ❤️

[zihaaaa]

1, 7, 22, 41!!

1. What is it you love doing the most and why?

I love reflecting. I love thinking. I love being mindful. The days I do these things are good days. I feel like we as a generation are really not getting to know ourselves, our minds, our capabilities because there is so much numbness out there. TV, movies, social media, music, drugs, alcohol, etc. It’s all so…superficial. I really do feel that you need to get away sometimes to really see the immense impact these things have on our mental health. I love being mentally present. I love reflecting on moments that have come to pass, moments that are, and moments that perhaps will be. Albeit, I do have a terrible tendency of overthinking haha, but I like that I get to know my strengths and weaknesses through my own thought processes and working on them. It’s like, now the culture is all be you, forget what the world thinks, you do you. And I think that sucks because we all have biases. There is a sense of arrogance in that line of thought. We all have things we need to learn and unlearn. We have to remember that people do have a right over us to an extent. (And this is why I love Islam, man. It’s timeless. All of these things are addressed in the Qur’an if we only cared to look.) I think I went on like thirty tangents there, but yeah, I love reflecting. On interactions with nature, people, animals, and even with my own self. I really do feel that doing so makes me feel more gratitude and closeness to Allah, and that is a very beautiful and necessary thing indeed. Basically, I love practicing my beautiful religion, day in, day out. Alhamdulillah.

7. What is your favorite quality in a person?

Kindness. Kindness all day, everyday.

22. Speed and adrenaline, or quiet and serene?

Had you asked me that before I had the pleasure of jet skiing in the middle of the ocean, I would’ve said quiet and serene hands down. But man, jet skiing and island hopping was one of the most exhilarating experiences ever and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. My husband was like, lets get a couples ski, and I was like nahhhhh I got this! And boy, did I ever! Our tour guide said that before me, he had never seen a woman, let alone a niqabi reverse parallel park a jet ski…and crazy thing is, this was my very first time on a jet ski! It was a blast. Alhamdulillah for everything, especially these privileged moments of safe adventure and travel.

41. Who is your favorite speaker(s)?

I have soooo many. Sooooo many. But I guess i’ll have to go with Imam Omar Suleiman. I look forward to his Ramadan series every year!

[zihaaaa]

45 reflective questions

1. What is it you love doing the most and why?

2. How do you cope with sadness?

3. What was the last thing you listened to and how did it make you feel?

4. What advice would you give off the top of your head rn?

5. Where does one find peace and meaning? Or where do you?

6. If you could change one thing in the world right now, what would it be?

7. What is your favorite quality in a person?

8. What is it you desire most?

9. Would you rather have a large amount of wealth, but have a chronic illness for the rest of your life with it; or have a low-income, but with immaculate health for the rest of your life?

10. Define happiness?

11. What is your greatest fear(s)?

12. If you were given $1000 rn, what would you use it on?

13. Top 3 travel destinations and why?

14. If you could instantly learn any language in the world, what would it be?

15. What do you want to accomplish before dying?

16. Who’s your past and present role model? Why?

17. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?

18. What was your favorite childhood memory?

19. Who are your favorite blogs?

20. What would you like to do in Paradise the most?

21. What strikes you most, beauty or brains? Or?

22. Speed and adrenaline, or quiet and serene?

23. Favorite animal and least favorite? Why?

24. What is the best gift someone got you?

25. When was the last time you had the most fun?

26. When was the last time you cried?

27. What do you struggle with the most?

28. Favorite food?

29. If you could start your own business, what would it be?

30. Any unique talents or skills?

31. The person you’d love to meet on tumblr?

32. Are you as you portray yourself to be on here?

33. Your biggest pet peeve?

34. The family member you are closest to?

35. The last time you said I love you and to whom?

36. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

37. Are you more of a giver? Or more of a taker?

38. Rain or shine?

39. Do you love your life? Or no? If you love it, what do you love most about it? If you don’t, what do you not like most about it, and what do you think you can do to change that?

40. What would be the last words you’d want to say to your loved ones if you could?

41. Who is your favorite speaker(s)?

42. How do you define love?

43. What do you pray most for?

44. Any spiritual advice for those struggling?

45. Last one is any question that comes to your mind!

#havent done one of these in a whiiiiile :) #time is a crazy thing

[zihaaaa]

#loooool literally me tho #pretty much chuckling to myself half the time at the looks/comments #ain't nobody got time

[zihaaaa]

@silbiaro

[zihaaaa]

Consistency is where it's at, yo.

Sometimes, you just gotta be real with you and work on the doing so that you can finally get to the feeling, be it enjoyment, ease, or whatever else you wish for.

These days, I'm just aiming for consistency. In my obligations, in my chores, in my ibadah, in my health. (I wish I could say the same for sleep though lol...)

First comes structure, then comes substance. In order to build a firm structure, you need that initial consistency. I've tried substance, then structure, but I find that I quickly lose structure and my substance begins to dwindle as well, loss of motivation and all that. So I'm just out here trying to be more consistent, organized, and accountable with myself. And inshaAllah that will lead to a stronger ability to self motivate myself even when the structure starts to shake, as it inevitably will.

Here's to hoping that with consistency will come ease, enjoyment, and inshaAllah, a deep cultivation of good habits and overall betterment!

#hello adulting #hello accountability #alhamdulillah through it all

[zihaaaa]

#love

[zihaaaa]

Also breathing slowly has helped my prayers in ways I couldn’t believe. It feels like time is moving much much slower and so naturally you’re not in a rush. When you’re breathing fast (I think a lot of us do, cause stress and stuff), it’s like you’re more liable to rush through your prayer cause your perception of time is moving quicker. Like breathing and time is relative somehow?

[zihaaaa]

It's amazing, really. The potential of evil. The ugly thoughts and emotions that we are all capable of developing if we are not mindful. Jealousy. Pettiness. Grudges. Ingratitude. How they creep up on you and you shock yourself with the depth of just...grossness. And then the niggling little voice of pure arrogance tells you to let these thoughts fester, let them stay a while, that it's okay to feel this way, even if it's just for a moment. But then that moment turns into another moment, and continues to do so, until it has seemingly become a part of you before you could even know it. That's all it takes.

And it's all because you let it. You let it stay in the first place. Because you wanted to feel that dumb, self righteous emotion. And while you may have been in the complete right, you weren't patient. You weren't kind. You weren't empathetic.

No one benefits from cultivating darkness. It only ever hurts. Yourself and others.

You must be mindful. You must squash evil and negativity right then and there, not leaving any chance for it to linger. And only then will you be able to keep lightness, goodness, and peace within yourself. It requires a strength, one that we absolutely can find if we are willing: in the remembrance of Allah, in remembrance of our limited days, in remembrance of our purpose.

Until we hold ourselves accountable to the standards we wish to see from others, no one will ever win. It will cycle, person to person, place to place, generation to generation. And what a sad, miserable thing that would be. To leave this Earth willfully contributing in evil and not in goodness, when we had all the chances to do otherwise.

[zihaaaa]

When I feel low, I try and force myself to indulge in some form of ibaadah even if it is repeating استغفر الله and it doesn’t miraculously remove the feeling all together but it does help me control myself a little more; to the point that I do not need to speak about it with anyone except Allah through dua or just inner monologue where I know only Allah knows about it and that He’s got me.

[zihaaaa]

I have found some of the best of my days to be days when I was most sincere with myself and with God. 

And I have found some of the worst of my days to be days when I was forgetful of myself and forgetful of Him.

I have found that the only way to fill that little hole of seemingly unfillable emptiness that is within us all is to be mindful. 

To think, and not just do.

To remember always. The good things, the blessings, the little and big successes, the obstacles you overcame with the help of God.

To reason. To find purpose in e v e r y t h i n g you do.

To reflect. In all things. Things that have come to pass, things that are, and things that will be (bi’idhnillah).

To repent. To let go of your past and embrace the opportunity you have now. Just like this very second. It’s yours and up to you what you make of it.

To forgive yourself and to forgive others. To let things go. To be better and hold yourself to that high standard from here on out cause you’re worth it. No matter the past, no matter the mistakes, you realize your worth in the sight of God. 

I have found that even in miserably attempting to do all the above, even with all my flaws, I am still capable of the greatness that I look up to in the best of mankind, the best of Muslims. Capable of, and not at all close to perfecting. And that still gives me hope. Because you know what the most beautiful thing about all this is? 

Allah does not expect perfection either from me, nor from you. As long as I even attempt the above with sincerity, I can be from amongst those whom Allah loves. 

And what more could I ever want?

[zihaaaa]

Absolutely wild how we can just talk to God. Like we can talk to the Creator of the Universe about a n y t h i n g and He’ll just listen to us.

#:') #truly and indeed wild #alhamdulillah

[zihaaaa]