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Needless to say, I am HORRIFIED.

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The Night before the Exam by Leonid Pasternak, 1895

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i actually do kinda like delivering groceries on the side because it gives me such a unique cross-section of the community. i never know whose groceries im shopping for until i finish the delivery and see them/their home and it's like it adds more detail to the picture of who they are. the baby supplies going to the apartment that i know for a fact is one bedroom (they'll be moving soon - i bet they're apartment hunting, i hope they find a place). the new cat litter box, bowl, and kitten food going to the house covered in "i <3 my dog" paraphernalia (a kitten definitely showed up on the porch recently and made itself at home). the fairly healthy boring grocery order that includes an incongruous tub of candy-filled ice cream going to the home of an elderly woman with toddler toys in the yard (it's clearly for her grandkids, whom she sees often).

shopping for someone else's groceries is a fairly intimate thing. i've bought condoms and pregnancy tests, allergy medicine and nyquil, baby benadryl and teething gel, a huge pile of veggies paired with an equally huge pile of junk food, tampons and shampoo and closet organizers and ant traps and deodorizing shoe inserts and a million other little things that tell a million different stories in their endless combinations. one time someone had me buy one single green bean. i messaged them to confirm that's actually what they wanted, and they said yes - neither of them liked green beans very much, but they had a baby they were introducing to solid foods, and they wanted to let him try one to see if he liked them. another time i had someone request 50 fresh roma tomatoes - not for a restaurant, but for a person in an apartment. the kitchen behind them smelled like basil and garlic when they opened the door. another time i brought groceries to three elderly blind women who share a house. that was one of the few times i have ever broken my rule and gone inside a place i've delivered to, because they asked if i could place the grocery bags in a specific location in the kitchen for them to work on unloading and there was no way i was going to refuse helping.

i gripe about the poor tippers, but people can also be incredibly kind. one time i took shelter from a sudden vicious hailstorm inside an older lady's home in a trailer park, while i was in the middle of delivering her groceries. we both huddled just inside the door, watching in shock as golf-ball-sized hail swept through for about five minutes and then disappeared. she handed me an extra $10 bill on my way out the door.

when covid was at its deadliest, people would leave extra (often lysol-scented) cash tips and thank-you notes for me taped to the door or partially under the mat. i especially loved the clearly kid-drawn thank you notes with marker renderings of blobby people in masks, or trees, or rainbows. in summer of 2020 i delivered to a nice older couple who lived outside of town in the hills, and they insisted i take a huge double handful of extra disposable gloves and masks to wear while shopping - those were hard to find in stores at the time, but they wanted me to have some of their supply and wouldn't take no for an answer.

anyway. all this to say people are mostly good, or at least trying to be, despite my complaints.

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I LOVE TUMBLR MOBILE SO MUCH

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I really hate begging

But I’m a chronically ill transgender college student and I’m in debt. I haven’t been able to work for a few months now. My goal is $100 by the end of the month so I can get out of debt ❤️

My Venmo is sun-and-moon18

I’ll edit your college level (or lower) paper or tutor you! I’m knowledgeable in psychology, biology, human anatomy, animal cognition, scientific method, history, and philosophy. My base price is $8/hr, but it’s a sliding scale ☺️

If you can’t help, I understand, but I ask that you please reblog this.

#help #health #venmo me #donate to my venmo #venmo #charity #chronic illness #transgender #chronically ill #essay #essay help #tutoring

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Bones + saying “Jim” in Star Trek Beyond

Bonus:

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Of course you don’t. Free college might hinder the school-to-prison pipeline your  prison owning donors depend on

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Took me until about halfway through college before I realized “study” means “play with the material in a variety of ways until you understand it” and not just “read the assigned chapters and do the homework” and I think that probably should have been discussed at some point prior to that.

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Quality KoRn lyrics collage

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look at this stock photo

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so after some reflection of james Joyce’s letters to his wife, I have a few questions:

1. ?!! !! ??

2. Was he always like that or was it like, they’d been separated for too long and he was so down bad that anything sounded good to him? Cus he didn’t start the correspondence that nasty! It’s gradual! Was he just so so horny? Or was he a typical shit fetishist?

#james joyce #james joyce letters #literature #booklr #history

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I love how in every single photo of Oscar Wilde he has the most extra supermodel pose

#oscar wilde #gay #gay men #literature #booklr #wilde #homo #homosexuality #gay book #gay authors #history

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had a dream that I met a wizard and we fell in love and became unhealthily attached to each other so we decided to meld into one single creature together but the process was horrifically slow and painful and most of the dream was us lying in bed holding hands while lesions opened up in our skin and seeped out blue and green fluid and the wizard said "this is going to take a very very long time" and I said "that's ok"