incorrect-ulster-cycle

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“I do sort of like it when he’s rude to me. Hopefully that’s more a psychological defect than a weird sexual thing.”

— Cú Chulainn, about Láeg

#this is what i mean skrjfkskdjsksk #get you a blog that can do both

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Láeg: I'll take care of you.

Cú Chulainn: It's rotten work.

Láeg: Not to me. Not if it's you.

#god i love going down my laeg tag and finding the sheer chaos of the mix of sources ive used for quotes #absolute chaos down there

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I (m, 17) did a lot of murder but I didn't have much choice about it, AITA?

okay i know it sounds bad from the title but hear me out, there's context.

soooo i've somehow ended up being the only person defending my province from invaders who keep stealing all our cattle and abusing all the women and so on. the only way I can protect my land + people is to fight them in single combat. and like, i keep winning. they're getting annoyed at me for killing their champions so they're sending more and more of them at me and breaking the rules of fair combat, but I'm not going to stop killing them until they turn around and fuck off. i feel like this is reasonable, it's MY homeland and they're not even justified in invading, if we let them get away with it we'll lose everything and their attempts at negotiation have been pathetic and insulting. but whatever that's beside the point.

but to make it even worse, some of them are my friends and foster brothers, and we grew up together. I don't want to fight them, but they keep refusing to turn back, and just because we were friends before, doesn't mean I want to give them free rein to trash my homeland. so I kinda ?? killed some of them ?? I mean I don't really feel like I had much choice but some people seem to think I should've just let them past so they could do whatever they wanted. I can't see it like that.

anyway am I the asshole here?? I feel like I'm not but people really don't like it when you do a lot of murder.

#this deserved more notes

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Emer: Take off your shirt.

Cú Chulainn: ...

Emer: I'm not going to attack you. I can take the sight of your naked chest without swooning.

Cú Chulainn: Are you sure? Because viewing my naked chest has caused many women to seriously injure themselves stampeding to get to me.

#source: the mortal instruments #shoutout to the time that last bit actually happened in the tain #cu chulainn #emer #tain bo cuailnge #ulster cycle #incorrect ulster cycle

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Cú Chulainn: Why was I born so attractive? Láeg: Because everyone would have throttled you within the first five minutes otherwise

#laeg mac riangabra #cu chulainn #source: gideon the ninth #it's gideon all the way down right now because i am scrolling through the goodreads quotes page #sorry #if you want variety you should recommend me things to use #i don't watch tv much these days #ulster cycle #incorrect ulster cycle

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Láeg: I cannot conceive of a universe without you in it. Cú Chulainn: Yes you can, it's just less great and less hot. Láeg: Fuck you, Cú—

#aided con culainn #oidheadh con culainn #does anyone know what my tag is because i don't #anyway i'm thinking of the moment cú chulainn sends láeg away from the battlefield in the early modern version #bc he knows he's gonna die and wants láég to live #and láeg is like. hey. fuck no i'm not going #but anyway #cu chulainn #laeg mac riangabra #source: gideon the ninth #ulster cycle #incorrect ulster cycle

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Ailill: You're only boobs, hair, and talk, Medb. Medb: No. I'm boobs and hair and talk and a hell of a sword hand.

#source: nona the ninth #medb #ailill #ulster cycle #tain bo cuailnge #can't remember the episode name for that section where she fights people #but pretend i tagged that #incorrect ulster cycle

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Cú Chulainn: Standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like ‘look at this fucking flower. This flower is taller than I am. This flower is winning and I’m losing.’

Láeg: Wow, you are not ready to hear about trees.

#cu chulainn #laeg mac riangabra #source: tumblr #i think. pretty sure i saw this post #ulster cycle #incorrect quotes

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"Good morning. As you begin your day, remember that violence is always an option and often the answer."

— Conall, probably

#this could have been any of them but let's throw conall a bone and give him a post #conall cernach #source: twitter #ulster cycle #irish mythology #incorrect quotes

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Láeg: Please don’t do anything overly dramatic or stupid. Cú Chulainn: You could sooner divert a river from its course than deny me my nature.

#cu chulainn #laeg mac riangabra #ulster cycle #irish mythology #incorrect ulster cycle #source: tumblr

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"average ulaid warrior kills five of the connachta every year" factoid actually just statistical error. average ulaid kills no connachta, because of the curse. cú gheoirg, who guards the fords and kills over 10,000 connachta each day, was an outlier adn should not have been counted

#greatest hits #honestly this one deserved more notes it was fucking hilarious

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Fer Diad: Bro- Cú Chulainn: No, no, hold up, rewind. Cú Chulainn: My tongue was down in your throat just a second ago and now you're calling me bro??

#i mean... #cu chulainn #fer diad #tain bo cuailnge #comrac fir diad #source: ??? #incorrect ulster cycle #regardless of whether or not you ship them they did canonically kiss at this point #just saying

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Fergus: Yesterday, I overheard Láeg saying “Are you sure this is a good idea?” and Cú Chulainn replying “Trust me,” and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life

#ulster cycle #fergus mac roich #cu chulainn #laeg mac riangabra #this is implying fergus is babysitting BOTH of them and. yeah that tracks #incorrect ulster cycle #irish mythology #medieval irish #source: ???

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Cet mac Magú: Good morning.

Celtchair mac Uthechar: Good morning.

Éogan mac Durthacht: Good morning.

Mac Da Thó: You all sound like robots. Good morning. Good morning. Spice it up a little bit!

Conall Cernach: *slams the door open*

Conall Cernach: Hey motherfuckers!

Mac Da Thó: There we go!

#scela mucce meic datho #why did past me spell that as magu #why not mágach like a normal person #Choices Were Made

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Cét mac Magu: Oh, Conall. How I have missed you.

Conall Cernach: And I have missed you, Cét. But don't worry, next time my aim will be better.

#scela mucce meic datho #reblogging all the underappreciated scela mucce posts #in case watching finn's video means youse get them now

[incorrect-ulster-cycle]

– Scéla Mucce Meic Dathó, trans. incorrect-ulster-cycle

#scela mucce meic datho

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A festive holiday special for you, featuring the story of Mac Da Thó's pig.

I feel the need to apologise for my accent in this video, and for once I'm not even talking about my Irish pronunciation. I have migratory vowels at the moment; they seem determined to move North, despite my never having lived further north than Cambridge. Sorry about that, not sure what's going on to be honest with you.

Links:

Angela Grant's translation

My tip jar

Buy The Butterfly Assassin (in English or French!)

And while I'm here, it's worth mentioning that I once played Mac Da Thó in a very silly sketch with the ASNaC department, and you can behold my thespian glory here.

#correct ulster cycle #not a quote #scela mucce meic datho