#// just like talking about the attendant as a concept and character discussing stuff in game too

[m0e-ru]

why do you use him/her he/she pronouns for mim in that post?? isnt mim strictly they/them???

yeah okay no. 1: sorry that post was literally unreadable no punctuation no context no shit no nothing no life. like literally how my discord message dumps look like I am SO sorry I really am. you can always ask though I talk about shit like it's an already known thing I'm sorry my dear okyakusan

no. 2.1: umm short answer: idc about pronouns really I've been juggling them the whole time. I'm balling 🤾🤾🤾 also I'm a writer and I like to be dramatic but that comes with the fact I make shit too vague and it doesn't make sense in the end but I like the drama. like telanovelas <-doesn't know what they're saying at this point

no. 2.2 and all the other sections under cut because I'll be a lot more talkative this time around while I uh. still have the energy though

I'll just put a really loose chart here for a second

Izy (my idea ,technically OC, of the whole Iznmi and Marie once was) - she/her Marie - she/her Mim - whatever (the situation calls for)

while publically and online I don't talk about my ideas in detail or like, something closer to a finished product, I do like to use pronouns dramatically trying to make use of the English langauge (<- thinks in 2-3 languages at a time). In this case, it'd be towards mim's different aspects. as a diety (she/her), human facade (he/him), or like uh Ame-no-Sagiri (it/its) and other stuff they do while possessing people probably.

imagine there being an omniscient narrator but likes to be dramatic and talking to an audience in the voice of a certain character and from that "perspective" (<- desperately trying to explain their bullshit writing style). If I write from a Teddie perspective then the narrative would use "sensei" for Souji and describe details curiously, or an Adachi perspective where the narrative would use "idiot" and sounds very annoyed and lazy, or Souji using "senpai" and is particular with descriptions and with things that catch his eye, or, very vaguely, mim trying to distinguish their roles and identities as god and as this human they're acting as.

but the narrator is also its own guy and decides to make analogies that could foreshadow something or make things sound interesting or sound embarrassing and cheesy and (gritting teeth, punching the fucking air)

onto a more personal take though, I guess I do leave the impression I use they/them for mim pretty firmly but not really strictly! I am a silly guy I don't really care it's not really firm at all lol

that, or you caught me while I was building this station from the ground up (2020 blog making) and pronoun usage was something really. violent eye twitching. to me. Sure I had some issues with it on a really personal level but it's fine now if that's what you're worried about. I get the feeling I do and if you came back after a while to see me messing around and letting she/he come out of my mouth without choking I'm sorry if that disturbed you. Just remembering I'm in a Community and this guy was a doll thing to be played around with and I can decide my corners and circles with blorbo. and also coming to terms with. myself (self projection revealing things about oneself WHO KNEW!!!!!!!) Or I could be completely mega wrong and I'm the only one in the world who had this experience oh well sorry

reiterating from my last letter (really long post, whichever that one was) "Mim" can be something so personal but at the same time I don't want to alienate people but make them feel comfortable with it instead. like a house name, like I am LITERALLY that friend who has nicknames for everybody and you just know who I'm referring to and you aren't obligated to use the same terms.

mim is like my guy. my boy best friend. my mom. my terrible aunt. my knows too much grandparent. my funny uncle. my cousin from a different city. my brother. my local cryptid freak thing

LIKE use whatever you want for mim, for Nami, for Izanami, whatever. I don't want you to force yourself to use mim because you think referring to them as anything else would make me turn into a hater. I am tottsly fine really its fun seeing what other people use. like a personality indicator. but if you do use mim genuinely then, well that makes me feel a bit soft.

if you want a closer look at my brain I'll try and plot it down /scratches head/

Mim is a general go-to, Mimi if I want to feel sentimental. Hell, I'll switch it up to Iznmi like calling your teacher sir Benny in class but having to say sir De Guzman to call him out from the faculty office (unless this analogy is a bit more specific, sorry, I meant when I'm vomiting ideas in message vs trying to plot it out for a proper discussion or talk to other people who don't know I use mim)

Iznmi is all contracted because of the Horrors but I ended up sticking with it, without the added Horrors, because it got easier to type and my keyboard already learned the word in its autofill, so. I also use it when I try to distance myself from blorbo vision and try to discuss more specifically and with proper details.

Izy is the oc she's her own thing. I got tired of using "izanami-no-mikoto" all the time i mean heres my nickname documentation

Izanami is when I'm referring outside of P4 like the creation myth or other Izanamis in different media (hifumi.........).

like a special code for myself especially when I'm trying to discuss all four in one sentence (IT GETS CRAZYYY) like "Izanami (p4) and Izanami (who marie was as a whole) and Izanami (creation myth) and Izanami (there was this really cool blazblue recolor I saw one time)" I WOULD'VE GONE INSANE !

okay back to pronouns um. having mim as a blorbo put me through very special horrors but at the same time a journey that taught me a lot. figuring myself out and what kind of trans swag I want. pronouns, presentation, etc etc all that junk. and I realized I do not really care? I can do what I want and so can mim and I'm happy for them and by extension happy for me. while I don't really care, I guess I don't like messing with the topic too much publically and I know of some people who have it close to their heart and do take identity and transness very seriously. I don't want to seem apathetic but also non accepting at the same time, it's just, augh, there are reasons I don't want to be popular and the fear of having a knife to my throat to have aggressive questions like this. you can do what you want! it's cool 👍 I don't want to take sides most of the time (unconfrontational, doesnt want to fight) but I'll have opinions when I have opinions (you know. the obvious). this is, auggg it's tiring to be people pleasing in general (it is 2am) THAT'S ENOUGH OF A PEROSNAL SPIEL GOODNJGHT ANON HPE YOU HAD A NICE FKRST TWO WEEKS OF THE NEW YEAR.

#assk #anon #kommento #// yeah okay started losing track of what I wanted to say here but even I can put my brain on a table and figure everything out in one go #// mim is like intimate blorbo name like calling your cat any name but their actual one and iznmi is like introducing them to people #// but also distancing and specific like trying to talk about the concept of prsona 4 iznmi itself #// just like talking about the attendant as a concept and character discussing stuff in game too #// do you get what I mean 'no' oh alright anyway hi guys. the end of the holidays can really get to you huh #// I miss you all. but iam. so busy. hugs and kisses gas station will open again some day

[portraitofwhite]

fatamoru spoilers (up to final door)

i want to talk about… the unexpected dynamics! (or interpretation) and also characters relationship with hope. I NEED TO RANT!!

the last door

very obviously, pauline/maria first as childhood friends strikes first. i also appreciated pauline teasing mell (maybe on the meta level that’s why javi from door 2 isn’t here—or on the story level his soul possibly wasn’t bound to the mansion but rather circumstances, being here at the right time or something or the sort). and the discussion between michel/yukimasa, bonding over their ‘unusual’ appearance and resulting weird looks or rejection.

michel and morgana

it makes me wanna bawl when i think about the possible innuendo that michel eventually views morgana as a friend but also an extension of his family. i didn’t catch this at first read but the fact that he is willing to depict her along him and his brothers on georges’ painting… fatamoru hits very strongly even in its details. i’m such a sucker for the ‘found family’ trope—kindred spirits where blood isn’t what ties them together in the first place.

i won’t go back on morgana’s admiration (or should i say idolization? adoration?) for michel, as her severed soul is modeled after him and her saintly persona, that is something the og game describes well. i just want to point out one thing: morgana’s christian upbringing and beliefs from her time prevent her from cursing her birth mother and other stuff (e.g. the WHG reminding God’s teaching about killing oneself). she does not only project her ideal self on michel, but also her desires by proxy—part of why she’s so insistent on him deserving revenge on the Bollingers and not understanding why he wouldn’t find joy in it.

giselle and witch morgana

the cocoon concept from hayden (hiding your true self and risking to lose yourself to your persona) and morgana’s gaslighting to the maid weren’t ultimately good and broke her spirit, but at the same time i don’t think they were ill-intentioned—that’s what i really like about this novel. morgana’s natural way of viewing the world, as a bleak and painful place where smiles are filled with betrayal, is very pessimistic, but that’s how she copes and somehow appears as the best way of thinking. she tries to convey those beliefs into the maid, out of annoyance (bc giselle is very lighthearted and optimistic as it gets) at first. however, she takes a liking to her. it is a way to ‘protect’ giselle’s heart, just like the cocoon.

morgana does not act in giselle’s best interest, she trusts that what worked for her will also do the job for her attendant, but that’s what breaks giselle in the end. because the latter grows in hope, in light, in truth ; not in illusions and dissociation (e.g. morgana’s fractured soul resulting in the WHG’s creation, and convincing herself she doesn’t belong in the realm of humans—both as a saint and witch). morgana is being self-conceited, to the point that her idea of ‘helping’ is twisting giselle’s core into the maid and discarding humanity.

despair truly results in tunnel vision and losing sight of what you are in essence, even accepting the horrors. that is something that is very well explored by all the characters in fata morgana.

i do find morgana/giselle’s relationship very interesting. the witch tries to mold giselle into her puppet, the conductor of the mansion’s tragedies, and ultimately as an observer to distance herself from the horrors (hence the famous ‘you were able to bear them because they weren’t your tragedies’). morgana calls giselle foolish a few memorable times, and while i think she means it, there’s also a tinge of affection? plus the door 4 aka illusion door to make everyone feel better, was also made for giselle… it’s complicated.

resistance

morgana is still very firmly opposed to michel and giselle’s reunion at first: what place does happiness have in this mansion? what do they have that she does not and makes it okay? the moment she’d reach the answer, it would mean that she is wrong for not casting aside her spitefulness. that is why she doesn’t want it.

the witch ultimately longs for companionship, she even makes a deal to both of them to curse the three men alongside her. she wants to partake in despair. she believes that is what is right.

but neither michel nor giselle were fit for that role, for they are compassionate, for they were able to give each other a second chance and believe in a newfound love. they do not hold a grudge, they do not find solace in that, that is why it fails!

despite their failings, they’re able to communicate. they are far from being perfect (their misunderstandings stem from their insecurities and secrets), but they’re able to reassure each other, they’re willing to listen and accept the stories of other people. that’s how they’re able to save morgana and the souls.

that makes me think of the key difference between morgana and michel/giselle. the later, with their own share of suffering and traumas, are willing to cast aside their bitterness and focus on finding new ways to live, for different reasons.

michel is forgiving, as long as the people who wrong him expressed their will to repent. he will treasure the good memories, and not let traumas tarnish them: he will try to understand.

giselle does not hold a grudge because she wants to put that energy elsewhere—into reconstructing herself and enjoying life to the fullest. that is true to her character.

to conclude

i love how each person has a very legitimate, and sensible motivation and do not excuse everything. and how you cannot equate characters to their wrongs ; while also holding them accountable for what they’ve done. you can reason other people’s pain, while also respecting yourself. a simple message, yet, very difficult to deliver rightly. and fatamoru just does that, it trusts you to understand it.

#fatamoru #fatamoru spoilers #the house in fata morgana #my rants

[after-the-shapes-and-beats]

Okay time for talking about ideas/concepts/trivia I haven't explored!! A lot is old stuff but some is new, lots of thinking lately lol.

Also a reminder you can totally ask me questions if you're interested in something I haven't mentioned or want something elaborated further on. <3

I was going to introduce Barracuda, Lycanthropy, and the other player shapes as characters, at different points and under different circumstances of course. I did post one concept of Barracuda, but the others haven't graced this blog yet. (Still have to finalise all their designs/redesigns lol)

Was going to do a lot of Q & Square unofficially adopted parent/child moments. Didn't have anything specific planned but just really looked forward to the potential fluff/angst etc. of it all lol

I was also gonna do shameless Square/Fresh shipping lmao. Its my story they can kiss if I want!!

Chip was gonna get a girlfriend. :)

Was going to bring up Qs past. It wasn't going to be super important/relevant in the long run, but it was going to be discussed.

I reeeaaally wanted to do some animatics. I'm not brilliant at that kind of thing but god I couldn't get them out of my head lol. Still can't haha. Especially one for the track "first crush" by Sabrepulse. ;)

This is a newer thought but I’ve been exposed to some new songs recently via my sibling playing rhythm games and GOD some of those tracks really made me go “I NEED to incorporate this into my jsab au somehow”. They slap dude. These songs fuck severely and I need to choreograph fight scenes to them.

A BIG concept I wanted to introduce was individuals having a "true song" (still workshopping the name) intrinsic to them that gives them their abilities. Square can hear them if he listens carefully. :)

Qs true song was gonna be a big reveal haha. It's not Close To Me. :^)

Considering the start of the blog was set approx. maybe only 1 or 2 months after the event of the game, there was gonna be a lot of Processing Trauma. Fresh is a recently rehabilitated force of destruction. Square just remembered he's basically god. It's all a lot to come to terms with haha. Denial can only last so long lol.

The main plot thing I wanted to eventually get to was basically "where did square come from and what are the repercussions of inserting himself among the mortals he created?"

I haven't pinpointed any characters' ages other than "around this area". Except Huey. Huey is definitely 17 lol. Everyone else is solidly an adult. Square and Fresh are mentally young adults. (Immature young adults, but still. Lol)

Before the game Chip lived mostly at sea, but after everything she decided to settle down to be close to her friends. :) She still spends a good amount of time out on the water, but she has people and a place to come home to now. uwu

Huey's special interest is flying/flying machines! When he and Square met in the factory, he was actually testing out a small single person craft he built when he got stuck.

Fresh is really into his creative hobbies. After knowing only destruction, creating is really fun and healing for him. :)

Q has a plethora of skills, most are expected because they live rurally and try to be as self sufficient as possible, but some are very out of left field lol.

Square likes dresses and being barefoot because of sensory issues, and swooshy dresses are very stimmy. :)

Sleeves don't agree with Fresh and his weird arms lol so he wears exclusively sleeveless shirts. God forbid he ever have to attend a formal event.

Fresh seems like the biggest source of potential angst, and yeah there's a lot there, but Square actually has more baggage of the two! While Fresh is up front about his traumas and insecurities, Square keeps all his stuff to himself. Fresh gets to hear a little bit but only because the two of them just understand and relate to each other in a way the others couldn't.

Aaaand that’s everything I’ve got I think!! I need to work on like, proper ref art and bios for the characters and stuff. Develop some underdeveloped aspects some more. I also need to shitpost more lol. Again feel free to ask questions or whatever!! I don’t currently really know how to move forward other than occasionally posting art so responding to you guys’ thoughts/suggestions for drawings or whatever would be good.

Love youuuu! <3

#just shapes and beats #jsab #I need to post at a time that isn't past midnight jesus christ

[funkymbtifiction]

hey! a few questions regarding S vs N after a few of your asks:

1. i notice a lot of emphasis on sensors (and especially Se) doing things but what sorts of things do sensors do all day compared to intuitives? i imagine most people regardless of type must be busy doing things all day just because as an adult there’s so much to do (cooking, shopping, cleaning, working, laundry etc) all the mundane stuff that generally won’t get done unless you do it, whether you want to/can do it well or not. do intuitives just neglect these things in favor of thinking/dreaming? or when referring to doing things is it more about your spare time?

2. are the day to day tasks of life i was thinking of above more related to S vs N or instinctual variant? will an sp type intuitive will still attend to all those practical concrete matters of life? if so, how do you tell the difference between an sp type intuitive and a sensor?

3. is it possible to be a sensor and get what needs to be done done during the day due to the fact they have to but find it draining and overstimulating and be exhausted from so many tasks and then not have much leftover energy to be “doing” in your spare time? and just wish to spend your free/relaxation time in silence doing nothing and being in your head?

4. are activities like video games, watching movies, listening to music, studying mbti more intuitive or sensory? they seem like they could go either way to me. does it depend on what you’re paying attention to? for instance a sensor focusing on the experience of a movie and an intuitive analyzing the meaning/characters/etc? or a se type feeling immersed in music vs a ne type feeling inspired? a sensor learning mbti for some kind of practical application vs an intuitive not necessarily having a purpose beyond their interest? something like that?

5. i’ve heard of high se types, esp se and fi, thinking how they feel in the moment is how they will feel forever. can the same be said of ne types at all? just as ne types can be impulsive can they also get caught up in the momentary feelings like that?

1. Intuitives stay busy as well, but any sensory activity is an add-on to their real desire for abstract thinking or theories. Sure, they do laundry -- but what they really want to be doing (and actively pursue in their life) is talking about the human soul, or the psyche, or forming a theory about human consciousness, or reading a book on psychology, or theorizing on how things are going to evolve, or what the future might hold with an anticipatory attitude, etc. The abstract/intangible world is what interests them more than reality -- ideas pregnant with POTENTIAL.

2. I tell the difference by asking if they are big picture thinkers or not. Big picture thinkers see the overall rather than the details; they tend to abstract away from specifics into vague generalities or branch out into another topic that veers the conversation off what's being discussed into more "interesting" (to them) territory. For example, you are talking about how your dog just died, and the intuitive starts talking about death as a concept and its affect on us. It's no longer about your dead dog, it's about a conceptual realm -- death as an existing force in your life, or what death means, or how we give Death a personality in fiction. N's can't help deviating from "what's real" into "what's real on another plane of existence." This is why they seem either weird, out of touch, irrational, or "head in the clouds" to sensing types (or, alternatively, the sensing type envies them and wishes they could think more that way). Big picture thinkers are also neglectful of details--like "is this even POSSIBLE?" or "what would need to happen BEFORE my idea could be realistic?" Sensors are attuned to what's real, what's possible, and the sequence of things, what needs to happen to make this other thing possible. They know you can't just leap from A to Q and ignore all the letters in-between.

3. Yes. That is also 9ish. To find life tiring and overwhelming. And introversion in general. I know a 9 INFP who finds life exhausting and just wants to spend all her spare time reading books.

4. They can be either one, yes. The purpose and focus of interest matters.

5. NFPs can get caught up in their feelings, yes. Any type can.

#question #mbti #sensor #intuitive

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

The Rooster Sunrise motel and the roots of the narrative at the sunset of the story. A masterclass in Dean characterization

If I didn’t care / more than words can say / if I didn’t care / would I feel this way? / If this isn’t love / then why do I thrill? / And what makes my head go round...

This song plays as Travis comes in to check at the Rooster Sunrise motel - late in the night, later than the motel technically allows checks in. Metaphorically, this episode happens later than it should. Everything happens later than it should. Dean defeats the monster too late, after it gets Travis dead. They’re running a case when they should actually be preparing for the ultimate showdown against God. Dean tells Sam the truth about Jack too late. The very episode is “out of place” in the season - I mean, purposely so - because it gives us a “old style” hunting case in a season where hunting has lost its original purpose in the narrative but has taken a different purpose, as a sort of caricature of itself, as we’ve discussed about before.

This episode is a last. Okay, we haven’t seen the next few yet, but this episode has a specific function, and it is to be the last traditional hunting case of the show. It’s about the past, and that’s why it can happen now that hunting can no longer exist, not really. This season, we have never had real hunting cases. Fake ones, weird ones, ones that just felt off -- obviously because the story is no longer working the way it did before. Chuck’s “hamster wheel” has been fully revealed, and the narrative can no longer function in the old way.

And this episode happens as... a sunset, actually. Or better, both sunrise and sunset because it shows us, in parallel, the beginning and the end. The first case Dean and Sam work together, and what is essentially the last, at least the last with the traditional formula - a monster of the week, a motel, a gross place, a civilian saved, some choking, some yeeting across a motel room, you know how it goes.

(The elephant in the room is the sun/sunrise imagery across the show, especially relevant after the latest episode brought back the Gas’n’Sip logo, of course, but let’s talk about something else here.)

There are many echoes in the episode. 2x11 Playthings, a case in a hotel that involved children. 11x16 Safe House, where a case was run both in the past, by Bobby and Rufus, and in the present, and involves a monster’s nest and visions. Of course 1x18 Something Wicked, where they defeat a monster that targeted kids after an attempt when they were kids had failed to get rid of the monster for good, and where we also get flashbacks of them as kids. And many other little references and callbacks. A pretty major one (*rubs hands together*) is 10x19 The Werther Project, where something supernatural causes hallucinations that make the victim kill themselves; Dean also almost stabbed himself back then. (Cuthbert Sinclair again... bless.) Oh, well, the pilot itself, where Dean and Sam comment that they make a good team. And then Carver-era secret and lies, of course.

And 14x13 Lebanon. (Yes it gets its own paragraph...) Dean smashing the stone in the ring, making the monster disappear, parallels straight to Sam smashing the pearl, making John disappear. The other monster of the episode is John, of course, who drops the kids in some motel alone while he gets “out of reach” when Dean tries to contact him on the phone (callback to season 1, when they kept trying to call John on the phone and he never answered, not even when Dean was dying or they were in their old house in Lawrence and terrified). John only appears as an invisible figure driving the car, symbolically driving their lives (all this “killing God and getting free” is nothing but a mirror to getting free from John’s influence, right). Callback to 9x07 Bad Boys, where we also see a younger Dean and we also deal with the weight of the lifestyle John placed on him, in an episode that features a literal ghost of a parent. (Heck, we even had Dean stealing food - in 9x07 he was caught by a policeman and brought to the boys’ house, now Caitlin jokes about arresting him.)

As 1x18 Something Wicked, we are presented with how growing up among monsters and hunting cases impacted Dean as a kid. Interestingly, Sam tries to reassure Dean in both episodes, telling him that he was just a kid and he shouldn’t be too hard on himself. In 1x18 he had ruined John’s hunt and put Sam in danger (of course the implication is that John put them in danger by using them as bait and expecting a child - addditionally unaware of what was going on - to watch after a younger child), now that he didn’t tell anyone about the nest because it was too horrifying to share that with other kids (of course, he’d also been a kid and shouldn’t have had to investigate a child-killing monster, so the implication is again that John shouldn’t have left them alone and unable to reach him in case of danger. It’s so telling that the episode has Dean discovering the bodies of dead kids while Sam is playing with another kid - although, of course, the game also turns terrifying soon).

So it’s an episode that has it all: the ghost of John Winchester, the way Dean’s parentified role impacts negatively his relationship with Sam (the episode establishes a connection between Dean shielding Sam from the horror of the monster’s nest and Dean essentially shielding Sam from the horror of the latest Jack news, it’s always about Dean feeling the weight of a responsibility to Sam because he’s Sam’s caretaker, even if he ostensibily mentions Billie’s plan and stuff as the reason of his silence), and of course the theme of FEAR.

I’ve been screaming this from rooftops pretty much since I’ve been here on tumblr - fear is the interpretative key to Dean’s character. Since season 1. Since the beginning. (You’re scared. It’s okay. I understand. See, when I was your age, I saw something real bad happen to my mom, and I was scared, too.) Many posts have been written about how anger is a secondary emotion, when the narrative ostensibly had Dean be “angry”. Dean has dealt with fear almost his entire life, and this episode basically works as an asterisk to the season. Hey, we’re having everyone comment on Dean’s anger! Including Dean himself! He says he doesn’t know why he has these outbursts! Well, we do know. Little reminder here now... he’s scared. And he’s scared because he cares, because he loves so much, and when you keep losing what you love you are scared, scared of losing more and more, stuck in a hamster wheel of losing and losing and losing.

In fact, if losing Jack will stop the hamster wheel, he’s fine with it, because as long as they’re stuck in the wheel they’ll lose Jack again anyway, they keep losing everything over and over, Jack and Cas and everyone. In this episode he mentions funerals of hunters, friends, how they couldn’t even attend all the funerals of people they were close to. There were so many. They’ve always been so surrounded by horror and fear and death. He just wants it to stop. (Of course the plan cannot work, just like the immersion therapy method didn’t work for Travis. Well, poor Travis’ idea of facing his fears to overcome his trauma worked very well on paper, just like Billie’s plan seems to be the best option on paper, but we still have a few episodes still to see...)

This episode is an exploration of the motives of Dean’s behavior, and it spells them out very clearly. John’s abuse and neglect, the forced parentified role he had to take towards Sam since a too-early age, the nightmarish horrors he had to see (while shielding Sam from, which reminds me of the infamous scene about Max’s childhood...), the neverending chain of losses with its baggage of fear.

Dean wants - needs - to defeat Chuck, just like Travis needed to face his fears and overcome his trauma. Because Chuck means hamster wheel. And the hamster wheel isn’t just a theoretical lack-of-free-will thing. It’s not just about a philosophical/theological concept. It’s about the very real cycle of horror and fear and loss that Dean has spent his entire life in. It’s about a pile of dead children, both a metaphor for his brutally ended childhood and a very concrete example of what has been haunting him for so long.

His apparently “okayness” with Billie’s plan is not out of a revenge thing or lack of forgiveness towards Jack (of course we can add millions of words about Dean’s relationship with Death). His okayness with killing Amara is... well, only partly about punishing her for, as he sees it, toying with him. His anger is because he feels so much. If I didn’t care / more than words can say / if I didn’t care / would I feel this way?

#my spn thoughts #spn meta #spn 15x16 #spn spoilers #dean and trauma #dean and john #dean and fear #dean and anger #parallels #spn

[dokidokivisual]

Gochiusa BLOOM episode 3 impressions

Previously: episode 2, episode 1 (seriously, the number of notes on ep 2 review is too low...)

Welcome to another review of Gochuumon wa usagi desu ka? BLOOM. In this episode, the series explores a topic it rarely touched previously, which is school life. Unlike many similar slice-of-life series, Gochiusa rarely concerned itself with such a mundane setting, preferring the ambience of cafés and cobblestone streets. There were a few exceptions, such as the first half of season 2 episode 10, but this is the first episode fully dedicated to a school setting.

Another distinguishing trait of Gochiusa is that the group of main characters attends not one, but several different schools. In particular, there are two high schools: a “normal” one attended by Cocoa and Chiya, and an “elite” one attended by Sharo and Rize. Moreover, there’s a group of middle school characters on the verge of graduating. As such, the question of which high school will Chino, Maya and Megu eventually choose was bound to come to the forefront at some point. And that’s exactly what happens in this episode.

There’s a lot of interesting stuff to discuss, so let’s get down to business...

The episode opens with a shot of Aoyama Blue Mountain on a boat, which also appears in the beginning of season 1 episode 1. By the way before COVID you could totally ride a boat like this in Colmar. Just watch your head...

Yeah, this is under the bridge from season 2 ED. Filmed by me.

Anyway, I’m being sidetracked. What’s important is that this is the only shot where you could tell it’s morning, because of the angle of the shadow from the bridge. It is indeed morning, and we see Cocoa and Chino walking down to school. Seems the summer vacation is over and it’s already September? Cocoa, the self-described pikka-pika no onee-chan, tries to coerce Chino into committing to enter the same high school as her, while Chino is not sure about that. We’ve seen Chino being unsure about her future as recently as this season’s episode 1, and in regards to the high school choice the time for a decision is quickly approaching.

Soon we see Maya and Megu who are facing the same decision. Megu seems to have already decided on what Maya derisively calls the gokigenyo school. The greeting gokigenyo (ご機嫌よう) comes from the word “kigen” (機嫌) which means “mood”, and can be literally translated as “how do you do”. However the same word is also used as farewell, which often causes troubles for translators.

The concept of “gokigenyo school“ has been popularised by the light novel and anime series Maria watches over us (Marimite), which is also one of the most influential works of the yuri genre. This concept has also been parodied a number of times, for example in the excellent episode 5 of Flip Flappers.

Megu manages to convince Maya and Chino to come with her to a tour of this school, and we get a close-up of Maya hinting that she’s definitely hiding something.

Meanwhile at Cocoa’s school, the class president declares the theme of the cultural festival being “cafe”, and puts Chiya and Cocoa in charge of it, because they work at a cafe. It seems that Chiya is considered to be more dependable than Cocoa by her classmates, since she got a higher rank. Nevertheless, it is Cocoa who mostly delivers the speech to fire up the other students.

Note the usage of Chinese tally marks to tally the votes. The five strokes comprising the character 正 (”truth”) equate 5 votes. This method is popular across East Asia, even in Korea where Chinese characters are no longer used.

Also I’ve seen a lot of people were confused by the inclusion of “sex museum” as one of the proposals, which is how 秘宝館 (hihokan) has been translated by the official subtitles. This word, which literally means “the hall of hidden treasures” has been used by various establishments of this type in post-war Japan, however only few of them remain open now. I think “sex museum” is a bad translation because, while technically correct, it breaks mimesis, or in simpler terms, immersion. The English translation is so blatantly inappropriate that it would never make it onto this blackboard, whereas the Japanese word is obscure and innocent-looking enough that it just might. A better translation would be “adult museum”, in fact that’s what the most well-known hihokan, Atami Hihokan uses for its English title.

As proof of each other’s ability, Cocoa mentions Chiya’s triple tray wielding skill (お盆三刀流 obon santoryu) which has been demonstrated in season 2 episode 1. Chiya brings up Cocoa’s “basking in the sun” (日向ぼっこ hinatabokko) attitude which supposedly makes her popular among customers. This is a reference to season 2 episode 5 where Rize says Cocoa always either practices latte art or basks in the sun.

On the way back from school, we learn that Chiya is actually scared of the responsibilities placed on her, and her dream of becoming the president of Ama Usa An franchise (which has been mentioned in s2e1, s2e9 and maybe other episodes I forgot) might be ruined because of this. Cocoa consoles her, again showing her motherly side.

Back at Rabbit House, Cocoa explains how the upcoming festival will be exciting (wakuwaku) and fluffy/cuddly (mofumofu). This is one of several times Cocoa uses silly onomatopoeia to describe something in this episode (aforementioned pikkapika onee-chan and describing her school also as mofumofu in a latter scene). Interestingly, all of these lines are anime-original, and at this point seems like an intentional effort to make Cocoa speak in a more eccentric manner.

In the next scene Sharo becomes angry at Chiya for keeping secrets from her, and blows her cheeks, which makes her turn into a Fugu fish, according to Chiya. Fugu is famous in Japanese cuisine for being a highly poisonous but sought after delicacy, however in this case the comparison has to do with the tendency of a live fugu (as well as other pufferfish) to inflate its stomach, giving it an almost spherical appearance to deter predators.

Next there’s another anime-original CocoChino scene where Chino asks Cocoa about what her school is like. This is my favorite part of the episode because it’s just so adorable. Like, even the fact that Cocoa is drying Chino’s hair with a towel after bath shows how close they became. The direction and the delivery of the dialogue is masterfully executed. Cocoa would be really hurt if Chino chooses any other school, and Chino knows that. But Chino can’t admit she’ll choose her next school because of Cocoa, at least not yet.

Now we move on to the main plot of the episode, which is Chimame visiting Rize and Sharo’s school. Like I said in the preview, this episode covers chapters 10 and 11 of the volume 5 of the manga, which in-universe occur at the same time. However while it fully covers (and has the same title as) chapter 10, only the first half of chapter 11 is included. So about 2/3 of the episode are dedicated to the story of chapter 10.

Chimame attend a speech by “OG” Mate Rin. OG in this case doesn’t mean “original gangsta”, but “old girl”, which is a Japanese term for female alumni of some school (there’s also OB for men). Chino recognizes Rin as the editor of Aoyama Blue Mountain, and I’m not sure if Maya and Megu ever met her, so they don’t. When Rin recalls a senior who turned her life around, Chino recalls her chance meeting with Cocoa. In particular the phrase deai ga taisetsu (”chance meetings are to be cherished”) sticks with her. On the other hand, Maya seems to be interested in the fact that Rin was recommended for scholarship. Interestingly in the manga, Maya slept through most of the speech. 

The senior Rin was talking about was obviously Aoyama and we see that there’s actually a huge bounty placed on her. The currency sign consisting of combined letters G and U wasn’t seen before, with prices usually displayed in yen, but there was a Euro-like sign at an open market at the beginning of season 2 episode 1, which might be a shorthand way to write GU. Either way this currency must have a serious hyperinflation problem as the reward for finding Aoyama exceeds 10 billion GU. In countries affected by hyperinflation, a stable foreign currency is often used to perform economic transactions, which might explain why most of the prices are in yen.

But is there some significance to this exact number? Why, yes, 10/27 is Aoyama’s birthday! It is also the start of “reading week”, which actually lasts 2 weeks, until November 9.

After the speech Megu gets separated from the rest of the group, and the other two also get lost in the vast campus of the school. As seen from the above interior shot of the school, it is also inexplicably rabbit-themed (or maybe just this particular hall is), with golden rabbit statues and also a picture on the left wall with the kanji for rabbit (兎).

Through a series of misunderstandings Chimame end up infiltrating the school with Sharo and Rize providing uniforms for them to blend in. Despite having trouble to behave “ladylike” before, Maya naturally blends in once she treats it as a game, and even gets invited to a tea party. She makes a mistake though by mentioning moyashi (bean sprouts) which is considered a cheap and low-class food, but she’s saved by the fact that the rich girls don’t even know what that is, and Sharo explaining how to prepare it in a fancy way.

Eventually the groups meet each other and Maya reveals she has been recommended for scholarship due to her good grades. Perhaps she also treated her school grades as experience points to gain, as the title of the episode (and the manga chapter) ”The whole world is my experience points” seems to suggest. This is the idea behind a real concept of gamification, by the way.

There’s also a callback to the season 2 episode 8, where Maya asks Rize for advice while Chino and Megu are spying on her. It is worth to rewatch that scene, because it’s full of foreshadowing for this episode. Back then Maya thinks she’s the only one of the three to go to this school, but now she thinks there’s a good chance all three will still go to the same school. Chino doesn’t seem to feel this way though.

In the end we see Cocoa and Chiya joining the group, also wearing the elite school uniforms, which is briefly explained by them gathering supplies for the cultural festival. I guess the next episode will explain how they ended up there. In the manga even the fact that they have a cultural festival wasn’t revealed until this point. Also in the manga fukiya club president, Karede Yura, inexplicably appears for just one panel so that Cocoa and Chiya could thank her, without any lines. In the anime she appears just as (if not more) suddenly, however there’s some foreshadowing with her inviting Rize to a tournament earlier, and she gets quite a few speaking lines.

If you listen closely there’s a funny sound effect as she looks at Rize, and then at Sharo. I really liked her design since her first appearance in the manga, and Koi probably does too, as her role has greatly increased in the recent chapters. Consequently her single-panel background appearance has been expanded as well in this episode, she got her full name mentioned in the credits, and there’s even a Karede Yura character song included on the second BD volume (which includes this season’s episodes 3 and 4). All things considered, I fully expect Yura to appear in the episode 4 as well.

The episode ends with Chino looking at the sky with a worried expression. It just hit her that both Megu and Maya are going to a different school than she is expected to go to. As Megu and Maya have a clear path forward, Chino’s future has become even more uncertain, and she feels like the odd one out in the group. Now the part of the ending where Chino is suddenly alone makes sense:

this is basically her imagining the future where Maya and Megu leave her. The coffee cup transition symbolises Chino waking up and seeing that MaMe are still her friends and aren’t going anywhere. We’ll see though...

This time it’s Megu doing latte art in the ending, and the picture is of Chino and Maya dancing. The weird thing is, Megu wasn’t even present at this scene, so how did she draw it in such detail?

Also another random fact I noticed: Chino’s Alice costume actually appeared in the opening of both season 1 and season 2. Here’s a comparison for reference:

Anyway, that was the third episode of Gochuumon wa usagi desu ka? BLOOM and I hope you enjoyed reading my review. See you next week... or so.

#gochiusa #gochuumon wa usagi desu ka? #is the order a rabbit? #review

[dillydedalus]

january reading

why does january always feel like it’s 3 months long. anyway here’s what i read in january, feat. poison experts with ocd, ants in your brain, old bolsheviks getting purged, and mountweazels. 

city of lies, sam hawke (poison wars #1) this is a perfectly nice fantasy novel about jovan, who serves as essentially a secret guard against poisoning for his city state’s heir and is forced to step up when his uncle (also a secret poison guard) and the ruler are both killed by an unknown poison AND also the city is suddenly under a very creepy siege (are these events related? who knows!) this is all very fine & entertaining & there are some fun ideas, but also... the main character has ocd and SAME HAT SAME HAT. also like the idea of having a very important, secret and potentially fatal job that requires you to painstakingly test everything the ruler/heir is consuming WHILE HAVING OCD is like... such a deliciously sadistic concept. amazing. 3/5

my heart hemmed in, marie ndiaye (translated from french by jordan stump) a strange horror-ish tale in which two married teachers, bastions of upper-middle-class respectability and taste, suddenly find themselves utterly despised by everyone around them, escalating until the husband is seriously injured. through several very unexpected twists, it becomes clear that the couple’s own contempt for anyone not fitting into their world and especially nadia’s hostility and shame about her (implied to be northern african) ancestry is the reason for their pariah status. disturbing, surprising, FUCKED UP IF TRUE (looking back, i no longer really know what i mean by that). 4/5

xenogenesis trilogy (dawn/adulthood rites/imago), octavia e. butler octavia butler is incapable of writing anything uninteresting and while i don’t always completely vibe with her stuff, it’s always fascinating & thought-provoking. this series combines some of her favourite topics (genetic manipulation, alien/human reproduction, what is humanity) into a tale of an alien species, the oankali, saving some human survivors from the apocalypse and beginning a gene-trading project with them, integrating them into their reproductive system and creating mixed/’construct’ generations with traits from both species. and like, to me, this was uncomfortably into the biology = destiny thing & didn’t really question the oankali assertion that humans were genetically doomed to hierarchical behaviour & aggression (& also weirdly straight for a book about an alien species with 3 genders that engages in 5-partner-reproduction with humans), so that angle fell flat for me for the most part, altho i suppose i do agree that embracing change, even change that comes at a cost, is better than clinging to an unsustainable (& potentially destructive) purity. where i think the series is most interesting is in its exploration of consent and in how far consent is possible in extremely one-sided power dynamics (curiously, while the oankali condemn and seem to lack the human drive for hierarchy, they find it very easy to abuse their position of power & violate boundaries & never question the morality of this. in this, the first book, focusing on a human survivor first encountering the oankali and learning of their project, is the most interesting, as lilith as a human most explicitly struggles with her position - would her consent be meaningful? can she even consent when there is a kind of biochemical dependence between humans and their alien mates? the other two books, told from the perspectives of lilith’s constructed/mixed children, continue discussing themes of consent, autonomy and power dynamics, but i found them less interesting the further they moved from human perspectives. on the whole: 2.5/5

love & other thought experiments, sophie ward man, we love a pierre menard reference. anyway. this is a novel in stories, each based (loosely) on a thought experiment, about (loosely) a lesbian couple and their son arthur, illness and grief, parenthood, love, consciousness and perception, alternative universes, and having an ant in your brain. it is thoroughly delightful & clever, but goes for warmth and humanity (or ant-ity) over intellectual games (surprising given that it is all about thought experiments - but while they are a nice structuring device i don’t think they add all that much). i haven’t entirely worked out my feelings about the ending and it’s hard to discuss anyway given the twists and turns this takes, but it's a whole lot of fun. 4/5

a general theory of oblivion, josé eduardo agualusa (tr. from portuguese by daniel hahn) interesting little novel(la) set in angola during and after the struggle for independence, in which a portuguese woman, ludo, with extreme agoraphobia walls herself into her apartment to avoid the violence and chaos (but also just... bc she has agoraphobia) with a involving a bunch of much more active characters and how they are connected to her to various degrees. i didn’t like the sideplot quite as much as ludo’s isolation in her walled-in flat with her dog, catching pigeons on the balcony and writing on the walls. 3/5

cassandra at the wedding, dorothy baker phd student cassandra returns home attend (sabotage) her twin sister judith’s wedding to a young doctor whose name she refuses to remember, believing that her sister secretly wants out. cass is a mess, and as a shift to judith’s perspective reveals, definitely wrong about what judith wants and maybe a little delusional, but also a ridiculously compelling narrator, the brilliant but troubled contrast to judith’s safer conventionality. on the whole, cassandra’s narrative voice is the strongest feature of a book i otherwise found a bit slow & a bit heavy on the quirky family. fav line is when cass, post-character-development, plans to “take a quick look at [her] dumb thesis and see if it might lead to something less smooth and more revolting, or at least satisfying more than the requirements of the University”. 3/5

the office of historical corrections, danielle evans a very solid collection of realist short stories (+ the titular novella), mainly dealing with racism, (black) womanhood, relationships between women, and anticolonial/antiracist historiography. while i thought all the stories were well-done and none stood out as weak or an unnecessary inclusion, there also weren’t any that really stood out to me. 3/5

sonnenfinsternis, arthur koestler (english title: darkness at noon) (audio) you know what’s cool about this book? when i added it to my goodreads tbr in 2012, i would have had to read it in translation as the german original was lost during koestler’s escape from the nazis, but since then, the original has been rediscovered and republished. yet another proof that leaving books on your tbr for ages is a good thing actually. anyway. this is a story about the stalinist purges, told thru old bolshevik rubashov, who, after serving the Party loyally for years & doing his fair share of selling people out for the Party, is arrested for ~oppositional activities. in jail and during his interrogations, rubashov reflects on the course the Party has taken and his own part (and guilt) in that, and the way totalitarianism has eaten up and poisoned even the most commendable ideals the Party once held (and still holds?), the course of history and at what point the end no longer justifies the means. it’s brilliant, rubashov is brilliant and despicable, i’m very happy it was rediscovered. 5/5

heads of the colored people, nafissa thompson-spires another really solid short story collection, also focused on the experiences of black people in america (particularly the black upper-middle class), black womanhood and black relationships, altho with a somewhat more satirical tone than danielle evans’s collection. standouts for me were the story in letters between the mothers of the only black girls at a private school, a story about a family of fruitarians, and a story about a girl who fetishises her disabled boyfriend(s). 3.5/5

pedro páramo, juan rulfo (gernan transl. by dagmar ploetz) mexican classic about a rich and abusive landowner (the titular pedro paramo) and the ghost town he leaves behind - quite literally, as, when his son tries to find his father, the town is full of people, quite ready to talk shit about pedro, but they are all dead. it’s an interesting setting with occasionally vivid writing, but the skips in time and character were kind of confusing and i lost my place a lot. i’d be interested in reading rulfo’s other major work, el llano en llamas. 2.5/5

verse für zeitgenossen, mascha kaléko short collection of the poems kaléko, a jewish german poet, wrote while in exile in the united states in the 30-40s, as well as some poems written after the end of ww2. kaléko’s voice is witty, but at turns also melancholy or satirical. as expected i preferred the pieces that directly addressed the experience of exile (”sozusagen ein mailied” is one of my favourite exillyrik pieces). 3/5

the harpy, megan hunter yeah this was boooooooring. the cover is really cool & the premise sounded intriguing (women gets cheated on, makes deal with husband that she is allowed to hurt him three times in revenge, women is also obsessed with harpies: female revenge & female monsters is my jam) but it’s literally so dull & trying so hard to be deep. 1.5/5

the liar’s dictionary, eley williams this is such a delightful book, from the design (those marbled endpapers? yes) to the preface (all about what a dictionary is/could be), to the chapter headings (A-Z words, mostly relating to lies, dishonesty, etc in some way or another, containing at least one fictitious entry), to the dual plots (intern at new edition of a dictionary in contemporary england checking the incomplete old dictionary for mountweazels vs 1899 london with the guy putting the mountweazels in), to williams’s clear joy about words and playing with them. there were so many lines that made me think about how to translate them, which is always a fun exercise. 3.5/5

catherine the great & the small, olja knežević (tr. from montenegrin by ellen elias-bursać, paula gordon) coming-of-age-ish novel about katarina from montenegro, who grows up in  titograd/podgorica and belgrad in the 70s/80s, eventually moving to london as an adult. to be honest while there are some interesting aspects in how this portrays yugoslavia and conflicts between the different parts of yugoslavia, i mostly found this a pretty sloggy slog of misery without much to emotionally connect to, which is sad bc i was p excited for it :(. 2/5

the decameron project: 29 new stories from the pandemic, anthology a collection of short stories written during covid lockdown (and mostly about covid/lockdown in some way). they got a bunch of cool authors, including margaret atwood, edwidge danticat, rachel kushner ... it’s an interesting project and the stories are mostly pretty good, but there wasn’t one that really stood out to me as amazing. i also kinda wish more of the stories had diverged more from covid/lockdown thematically bc it got a lil repetitive tbh. 2/5

#the books i read #long post #sonnenfinsternis is so good the audiobook nearly made me cry in the supermarket

[vios-rockland-corner]

Dollmaker Talk PT 2

*snaps fingers*  Guess what?  I got the “okay” sign to talk a little bit more about Runawayoutlaw’s unfinished Dollmaker build.

That means yes I will be going into my thoughts about the characters and setting this time.  I focused on Dollmaker being outside the Rockland canon and the game mechanics last time.

(MAJOR spoilers below for the unfinished Dollmaker build)

First of all, what is the plot of Dollmaker?  Well the MC this time around is a medical student attending a seminar that day on improving relations between demons and humans for the greater good.  One of the very speakers at the lecture is none other than Dr. Sano Kojima.  The MC apparently catches his eye and you two seem to get along fairly well considering you admire him for his position (he’s a demon ambassador) and he appreciates that you seem to be specializing in demons for your medical degree.  All seems to be going well and you look forward to discussing the profession with him more...only to get caught off guard when he knocks you out and brings you to his home.  The atmosphere quickly changes when you wake up and he cuts straight to point that his main goal is turn you into a human doll!  He puts a binding spell on you so you can’t escape the house, but he gives you the freedom to walk about as you please.

That’s pretty much the gist of the game.  From there it’s about exploration and getting to know the inhabitants of the house, and on rare occasions, seeing some visitors.

Sano Kojima

As I stated in my previous post, both Sano and Akira have been introduced beforehand in BTD.  This game was meant to revamp the characters and stories.  For the most part, I’d say personality wise that Sano stays very similar to his BTD counterpart.  He’s very calm and professional.  He’s very much into his research and appreciates compliance from the MC.  He can still kill you in this, but the only such ending I found is if you fight back repeatedly right away.  Like I said, he prefers compliance.  He is probably one of the more sane of the three main house inhabitants and possibly the nicest?  It’s hard to say when I feel like both Sano and Annabelle’s routes weren’t quite finished yet.  That or I haven’t found everything yet.  

I will say compared to the BTD game, Sano here doesn’t show nearly as much sadism or malice.  He DOES still want to turn you into a doll though, but again I don’t think his route was fully finished (or I haven’t found the right paths yet).  I didn’t get a full ending with him completing the doll transformation, so other than the beginning, we don’t get to delve into that obsession as much as I would have liked.  I remember playing BTD and getting that one ending and thinking, “Oh!  I love that concept, I wish I could have seem more of the character focused on that.”  Dollmaker is obviously supposed to do that, but the creator didn’t get around to the finishing touches.  I kept getting stuck in the same loops with “Sano’s route,” so I can’t say much else.

Annabelle Winter

Annabelle is a brand new character.  There’s a bio for her luckily in the game to explain some of who she is (a former lead singer), but otherwise I probably was able to get the least information about her in the game.  I remember some notes about her one tumblr way back when Dollmaker was being developed.  Basically, she’s supposed to be Sano’s “first doll.”  You, the MC, would then end up being the second doll.  You can tell this really doesn’t sit well with Annabelle, even if I couldn’t get much more information about her feelings in the game.  There’s a conversation between Akira and her you can spy on, but you really aren’t quite sure what’s happening.  Her room was also always locked for me.  I don’t know if the programming for it all hadn’t been completed like Sano’s wasn’t, or I just wasn’t performing the correct actions.

The existence of Annabelle is interesting though because then it does make you ask questions like: What’s her relationship with Sano?  Are they lovers or something else?  Is she jealous that he’s making a new doll? Does Sano plan to throw Annabelle out after he has you? Does this mean the MC could also get tossed out later? What’s her relationship with Akira?  Stuff like that adds more tension to the atmosphere.  On the plus side, at least you know Sano’s successfully turned someone into a doll before, so you know the procedure should go fine (yay?).  Personality wise, I didn’t have enough to go off of to get a real good idea of what she’s like.  She can be a little bitter and creepy, that’s for sure, but also talks sensibly with someone like Akira.  It’s hard to say.

Akira Kojima

Ah Akira!  Probably the character that was the closest to completion in my opinion.  That doesn’t mean his whole path WAS complete, but compared to Sano (one death ending vs. couldn’t progress) and Annabelle (hardly any progression and no ending found), Akira actually had decent introductions, quality time with the MC and an ending.  Granted, it was mostly the ONE ending...but I kind of loved it and it wasn’t a death ending at least.  Before I get into that, what’s he like in Dollmaker?  Well he definitely has more of a domineering and feisty personality I’d say, contrasting nicely with Sano.  He also can be both naughty and tender I’d say when it comes to romance.  He can be pretty sensitive at times.  You also learn he’s a contract killer in this game, but he doesn’t seem to really enjoy the work.  That’s the only major hint I’d say of the guy being unhappy.  I remember during the development process it was hinted that Akira has a LOT of baggage in this universe.  Baggage unfortunately that seems to make unstable enough that he will completely flip his lid if he thinks someone is turning on him.  What I’m saying is...the dude actually has a yandere ending XD  I’m not joking.  For those who know of my main blog and are probably thinking, “Did YOU enjoy that?” the answer is obviously HECK YES!  See what happens is if you get too cozy with Akira, apparently that makes him latch onto you.  

I swear to god when I played my first run, I was NOT trying to make him jealous.  I thought there was more to do so I didn’t think it was a big deal if I didn’t wake him in bed (it seemed rude to me), go to the kitchen and compliment Sano’s eye.  But those Telltale mechanics from the last post I talked about?  This is where I realized too late they were hinting that Akira gets VERY aware of what you do in the house once he starts to like you.  He doesn’t like it AT ALL if you either seem like you’re trying to leave or get friendly with anyone else then.  He goes full “snap.”  What he does is try to “train you” so that you agree the MC belongs to him and him alone then.  I love how he does it actually because I find it pretty realistic.  Yeah he gets really rough with you initially once he’s snapped, but the big thing is he throws you into a large closet.  He just leaves you with a bucket and nothing else.  And then he makes NO CONTACT with you.  You go through...who knows how many days with occasional bottles of water or food placed on the floor without Akira talking to you or even you seeing him.  Depending on your actions, sometimes he’ll pop in to check on you, but if you show that your spirit isn’t broken yet, he goes back to the no contact.  He’s essentially driving the MC insane through isolation.  It’s very simple but incredibly effective.  Imagine literally being given nothing to do for days on end with limited food and water and just a bucket to relieve yourself in.  It can start to wear on you.  Humans are social creatures too (we NEED other people).  I love MC’s with stronger spirits actually that don’t bend to a yandere’s whims all that easily.  So yeah, I kept the MC yelling and tried to just hold out as long as I could.  This puts you in a loop though and Outlaw did a nice little touch where there’s this static effect over the screen when you continue to make decisions.  This helps to emphasize how monotonous this routine is becoming for the MC and you really feel less of the urge to fight back anymore.  I can see why the MC broke in the end.  Once they are broken, Akira comes to collect you and that’s pretty much the end.

Obviously I loved playing through Akira’s path the most.  I will do one small critique here since...I’m kind of a nut about yanderes.  I think it would have been nice to have a FEW more hints before Akira’s “snap” that he suffers from something like anxiety or separation over losing people.  There might have been some and I just got lost in the build maze finding this information XD  Like I said, I knew he had baggage (and even lost a lover) from the creator’s tumblr page during development, but I think it would have been nice to have some hints like that in the game.  Just food for thought in case they want to try another yandere character in the future.  Some people don’t like if you pull a “yandere snap” out of nowhere without at least dropping some kind of hint of instability with the character prior.  I mean I’ll always enjoy yandere endings regardless honestly XD  It depends on how serious you want to take it though.  This situation was different than say Marcus from Till Death Do Us Part only because....that game basically is ALL about the “snap” there (no real progression to it like in Dollmaker).  You had just enough backstory (The MC and Marcus are divorced and Marcus gives you nightmares) that him coming back as the ex from hell isn’t surprising.  People can fill in the blanks and fantasize all they want there about what went wrong with the relationship beforehand.  With Akira, you’re seeing the relationship progression play out, so there’s a little more pressure to make the “snap” a little more believable.

I don’t know how fair it is to critique an] game that’s clearly not finished though 0.o

There’s was other stuff in the game I enjoyed like all the little Easter eggs with the plants and paintings, and Cain even popped up briefly in a bad end :P  There was other stuff I also didn’t learn about though like Mio (sorry I scared you lol), but it is what it is.

Still a nice treat.

#dollmaker #runawayoutlaw #Sano Kojima #akira kojima #annabelle winter #unfinished build

[nilim]

How would someone start to get into LARPing? I've always thought it sounded interesting but I have no idea where to start.

Oh boy, both a very easy and a very complicated question, because it depends on where you live and what you want. Also I haven’t been to that many different LARPs, so I will keep this mostly general…. This got long, so tips under the cut:

I’m very much a ‘jumped in the deep end without any preparation and see where I end up’ kinda person. I first started LARPing when I was 18. It was a ‘smaller’ LARP and it was at a place where my brother also LARPed at, although I didn’t see him for the entire weekend so I was pretty much alone. It was also an ‘adult’ LARP, so 16+ only. It was also the most I laughed in a 3-day stretch of time and absolutely delightful.

Basically, anyone can get into LARPing, you just have to keep an open mind when going into these things. Here’s a disclaimer though: I’m an easy person, I don’t have any disabilities, was in a mentally healthy state and I’m very used to camping outdoors, so I could put up with a lot - there was nothing that really ‘scared’ me about going except the whole ‘oh no strangers’ and mild social anxiety thing. Therefore, I didn’t do a lot of research beforehand about which LARP I wanted to attend - I attended my first LARP because it was relatively close to where my parents lived and I knew my brother LARPed there. That’s it.

However, that was more than 10 years ago and I’ve since grown a little more socially anxious and also a little more socially aware, so I would advise you to scout out different LARPs in your area. Almost all LARP events I know of have an online presence, through twitter or facebook groups, websites, etc. Just have a look what players are saying on those pages - you can usually judge the general feel of a LARP by the type of discussions players are having. 

Also, ask questions if you’re unsure about something. In general I’ve found that LARPers are very eager to bring people into their hobby, and are very helpful and honest when answering questions. Check whether there is a code of conduct. Check whether there are confidential counselors present if anything were to happen. Check whether there are rules about harassment etc. If you’re unsure about something, ask the players on those social media pages what their experiences have been. Usually they will be honest, because they are ‘customers’ of the LARP much like you will be. Treat it like you’re shopping around for a hotel or holiday! Weigh the pros and cons.

As for the LARPs themselves, there are many different kinds of LARPs. I’ve only done high fantasy LARPs so far, and pretty large ones as well. Conquest of Mythodea is the largest LARP in the world, and it can be overwhelming for some people. But I also find them very calming in a way? When there’s so many people around there is almost no direct pressure on me to do anything. The story will continue regardless of what I do. With small LARPS or ‘parlor’ LARPs, which usually consist of a very limited group in a much smaller area, there can be more pressure on you to ‘perform’ your role. However, the upside of these LARPs is that you get some very deep RP and your character is important to the story. The game leaders will make sure to focus on you, and that can be very exciting! 

I’ve also only attended LARPs where I would stay overnight. My first LARP lasted 3 days (Friday-Sunday), and Conquest of Mythodea lasts 5 (Wednesday -Sunday night). If you’re unsure about immediately going for such a commitment, maybe try out shorter or smaller LARPs first to see if you like it? Also, almost all LARPs have out-of-character areas, so if things get too overwhelming you can retreat from the game and just chill. Usually there are dedicated areas in the game, as well as your personal areas (e.g. people’s personal tents are completely off limits in Conquest, and nobody may enter them except for you. They may also not demand that you come out, etc). 

Once you’ve settled on a LARP you want to attend, but don’t want to do it alone, you can ask around to see if there are any groups that might interest you in joining. Most LARPs have many different factions that you could join, and a lot of larger LARPs also have newbie groups that are specifically designed to teach you the ropes of the game. We joined the banner of explorers in Conquest of Mythodea and people were very friendly with explaining rules and such to us. However, they also usually let you go off and do your own thing if you’re not interested in participating or being forced into performing faction-related things. It was real nice. Again, ask around, see which groups of people can take you under their wing - usually there’s a lot of people willing to help you! A lot of this asking around you can do online before you even attend the LARP.

Once you’ve chosen a LARP and/or even a faction, make sure to read up on the rules of the LARP. Sometimes there’s a lot. Nobody is expecting you to know everything by heart, but it’s appreciated to take a little bit of effort so you know the general rules, especially around OOC vs IC gameplay, and the concept to roleplay with other people. LARPing is very much a “Yes and…” kind of experience, much like D&D. Prevent shutting down other people’s RP moments just because you want to do something cooler. (Note: Absolutely shut down somebody’s RP moment if it is making you uncomfortable. You are more important than RP!). Read up on combat rules, if you’re planning on taking part in combat. Make sure never to just hit people on the head, never carry sharp objects on you, make sure to know the rules about touching and grabbing other people, some LARPs don’t allow it.

Now you just need a character. Many LARPs have you build a character much in the same way like you would build a D&D character; you have a number of skill points that you can assign to different skills, such as thievery, magic or hitpoints. Read up on the rules and do whatever you think would be fun. In my general experience, these skill points are way less important than you think. 99% of LARP is just hanging around and talking to people, and you don’t need skill points for that. Additionally, realize that nobody actually knows your character (unless you’re playing a small parlor LARP), so you can usually tweak your character while you’re playing. So far I’ve always tried to play shady thief characters or dumb fighter characters, but I always instantly get sucked in when there’s puzzles and mysteries to solve, so I often let the ‘stoic person who doesn’t care about books’ thing go as soon as the game presents me with secret puzzles and coded texts. And that’s fine. Just make sure that once you’ve settled as a character after some time IC, and people know you as that character, you roleplay somewhat consistently or otherwise it gets confusing.

As for preparation for going to an actual LARP: There’s a lot of good resources out there on the internet! Just google things like ‘essential items for a LARP’ or ‘packing list LARP’, especially if you’re planning on camping. There’s also a huge amount of online stores that cater to LARP outfits, LARP weapons, and adjacent fantasy setting camping items. If you’re on a budget, don’t worry about it - nobody is going to be snobby about your outfit if you don’t look as cool as the next guy. However, please do try to keep it setting-compliant. Don’t show up in jeans and a t-shirt to a fantasy LARP. Even on a budget, it’s relatively easy to find some second-hand clothes at a thrift store or flea market (that’s where I get half my LARP clothes). Much like many hobbies, this one too requires a little bit of investment on your part before you go. Please don’t splurge on equipment before you’ve even attended a LARP though – maybe you won’t like it, and then you’ve invested all that effort already. Just take it easy and test out the waters a little bit.

And in-game? What if you’re unsure about how to get into the game? First you have to realize that everything is game. Even just sitting around the campfire enjoying some bard songs is game. There’s no right or wrong way to play in a LARP. But if you want to get into more plot-related stuff: Talk to others. Ask questions, about everything. During our 5 days at Mythodea this summer we did literally nothing but walk up to random places or events, tapping random people on the shoulder and going ‘what’s happening here?’. And people will do it a lot with you too, we’ve had so many people asking us who someone was, or what was going on, even though we didn’t know. Be not afraid to ask questions. It’s the quickest way to make new connections and get new friends and to get involved in the plot. Usually there’s NPCs around that you can ask for quests. Try to find out where stuff is happening. Or make your own quests, if you enjoy making that kind of character. It can be a lot of fun to send out other players to do things for you. Player characters come in all kinds of flavours. Maybe you just want a character that hangs out in the camp and cooks for people. That’s fine too! Like I said before, there’s no right or wrong to play. 

If you want to fight undead and smash people with a foam sword, there’s LARPs for that. If you want to solve a murder mystery in a haunted mansion, there’s LARPs for that. If you want to be a wizard and attend magic school, there’s LARPs for that. If you want to sneak around and steal people’s valuables, there’s LARPs for that. It’s great! Just look around and see what kind of LARP and what kind of character suits your style. And it’s also fine to have your first LARP be a run-of-the-mill fantasy setting where you just walk around and observe other people and don’t get involved in the plot at all, which is mostly what I did during my first LARP. 

Anyway, this got very long, sorry. But I hope these tips help you out!

#LARP #Anonymous

[crystalracing]

Forty years ago a memorable album and driver were born. With one thing in common: the wall

by Alberto Antonini

source: FormulaPassion.it

“No.”

The audience of journalists remained frozen for a moment, then they all applauded. With the exception of that colleague who had studied and formulated a half-minute question to be answered with a syllable. From that blond who looked like he just woke up (badly) and instead came from a day on the track.

Kimi Räikkönen turns forty: and in the game of “remember where you were when…?” I wanted to look around the events of that autumn 1979 (yes, of course I was there, and also quite big; so big that I don’t remember it anymore). Well, when Kimi-Matias was a month old, in the famous house with the toilet in the yard, Pink Floyd released one of their most iconic albums. A concept based on the story of a man who builds a (virtual) wall around himself to protect himself from the world. And so far, it seems to me that the comparison with the character Räikkönen may fit well. Then came the film, with the role of the protagonist, Pink, played by Bob Geldof, at the time another beautiful sociopathic temper. So much that during the filming, Alan Parker, the director, went so far as to tell him that yes, it’s okay to internalize, but it may be better to reveal a feeling or two…

Is it just me who sees the similarities? I met Kimi when he was a rookie in 2001. He talked so softly (it’s interesting to hear me say it) that you had to lean forward. And it was of little use because, rather than expressing concepts, he threw words into the mixer. But I remember a sentence from the first interview, when I asked him about his military service. “I didn’t like it so much. I don’t like having people tell me what to do.”

Well, welcome to Formula 1, the planet where everyone thinks they always have something to tell you (however, if you find it, enjoy the video of Kimi as a recruit instructor). That first year in Sauber, a young Räikkönen discovered at his own expense that isolating himself from the world has a price. They realized that he didn’t pay attention during the briefings, he was reprimanded and had to apologize to everyone. I imagine that from there he learned to listen without giving satisfaction. I had several meetings with him at Ferrari. He mostly played with his mobile phone or with what was in front of him. But then when he went to the media he would repeat perfectly the instructions he had in the briefing. (The other driver had done it too…).

Not that it was always easy. Once we had a discussion during a winter test. During the long run there was a failure of the MGU-K. At the time, however, due to instructions from the top – indeed from the very top – one should not talk about problems with the power unit. He grumbled: “I don’t feel like telling people bullshit”. I told him it wasn’t bullshit at all: it was enough to talk about an electrical problem, after all what is the “K” if not an electric motor? He looked at me strangely, and went in front of the press. And he didn’t disappoint me.

Another time, however, still in a briefing, he humiliated a marketing manager who had shown him a request sheet, by scrunching it up in front of his face. “This stuff is useless.” And I also remember that debriefing (listened to through headphones) at the end of a race in which he felt penalized by his strategy. You’ll excuse me if I don’t say which one, but Kimi was silent or almost for the whole meeting, and at the time of the comments he started in a low voice: “Well, I don’t understand why you keep me here and you pay me what you pay me if then I can’t do my race…”. I don’t add anything else, except that that meeting didn’t end in a low voice. And we had also won…

Of all the nicknames, Iceman always seemed the least appropriate to me. I don’t pretend to judge people, but maybe I have a minimum capacity to describe them, having worked with them. Kimi is not a cold man; he is a shy man, with some communication difficulties, who has built his own wall, made of simulated indifference and sometimes even aggressiveness, to defend the thing he cares most about: his privacy. He has always privileged the essential. Although he drove for many years in a British team, unlike Vettel who uses fluent and refined English, he developed a primordial language; with his own concept of the comparative of majority (“more worse”) and a series of made phrases, such as “it is what it is”, which he uses to flavor public statements. Except then to amaze you with ironic and sharp phrases that show how attentive it really is to the world around him. I once accompanied him to Taiwan for a Ferrari promotion day. He quietly endured the press ritual and the adoration of the fans. Then, in a reserved room, in front of a chicken salad, he murmured with a half smile: “Does the California sell so badly that it is necessary to do all these events?…”.

He hates wasting time, especially on planes, he hates disorganization, but it only takes a moment to ignite his enthusiasm. Sponsorship day, on the outskirts of Shanghai, a horrendous dusty shed. He arrives and starts to protest: “There’s too much dust here, I have asthma, I can’t stay here…”. The program includes a meeting with a Chinese football star. And immediately afterwards, Kimi has to get into a road Ferrari and, controlling the drift, try to hit a ball and send it into the net. That’s like threading a needle on a horse. Well, can you believe that an hour later, when the cameras were off, he was still trying, tyre squeaking and laughing, and he kept going until he managed to hit at least the post?

The Kimi at the tracks and the private Kimi are two totally different people. Once we were guests of a mutual friend during a Grand Prix weekend. The first two days I saw the best Kimi, smiling and relaxed. He would go into the house, change immediately into his resting uniform – black clothing and white socks – and go about his business. I saw him with my own eyes, armed with a screwdriver, installing the wi-fi at our guest’s house. He arrives Saturday, bad qualification, he enters without talking, takes his share of pepperoni pizza and sits alone on the couch. The only time he opens his mouth is when a suspicious crackle rises from the sofa: “Hey, it’s the leather that makes the noise, not me!”

Sunday arrives, the tension of the race subsides and the only ice left is that in our glasses of vodka and sparkling water. Sitting in the garden, he starts to tell me in detail how he and his friends, in Finland, have fun with jet skis, so much that by now those from the water police have become friends… A river of words, but without protagonism. That evening I was reminded of another evening (or rather, late night) in Monaco, when I had met his father Matti. In an unpretentious bar above the Tabac, as unpretentious (always relatively, you understand) was the boat that housed Räikkönen sr. He had a black shirt, a bit of belly like an old rocker and an innate sympathy. I think his son looks more like him than he imagines. And I know he suffered so much when Matti left, too soon.

At this point, I know that someone will object: and about Räikkönen the driver, about his contract, about how the story with Ferrari ended, don’t you tell us anything? The fact is, I wanted to tell you about this, about Kimi. Trying to make it clear how and why, no matter how apparently abulic, grumpy, even unpleasant he can be, the instinctive sympathy he arouses in so many people is not misplaced. Of the driver I would like to mention two memories: one is the last (for now!) victory in F1, which in these days also turns one year. That evening in Austin I was working in the office and I could hear that in the big room, equipped with several bottles of champagne, the tone of voice of Kimi rose more and more. At the end he didn’t attend the party that was organized in the hotel. The few who saw him had to go up to the room…

And then there’s a second-hand story, told to me at Maranello. Also at the end of October, but twelve years ago. You know well what I’m talking about. Late at night, a group of Ferrari engineers appear in a bar. With them is a guy wrapped in a sweatshirt, the hood is pulled over his eyes. As soon as he enters the counter, his face is revealed and he screams: “I AM KIMI RRRÄIKKKKÖNEN… FORRRMULA ONE WORRRLD CHAMPIONNNN”…

Happy birthday, Pinki.

#Kimi Raikkonen #raikkonen

[douxreviews]

American Gods - ‘The Secret of Spoons’ Review

“The world is either crazy, or you are. They’re both solid options.”

American Gods' second episode presents us with a game of two halves. On every possible level that you can interpret that phrase.

The first time I saw this episode, I had two thoughts about it. The first was that I loved every single thing about the opening sequence introducing Anansi. The second was that it was kind of a dull filler episode that just existed to set up things that needed to be set up for the rest of the season.

Taking these in order; Yes. Every single thing about Anansi, both in this scene and going forward, is amazing. It's impossible to take your eyes off of Orlando Jones as he moves through the hold of the slave ship, and he has the sort of charisma that genuinely gets religious movements started in the real world. The moment when he mentions slavery existing for the purpose of harvesting cotton and indigo and then crisply pulls down on the seam of his own purple shirt as if to angrily straighten it is a great character beat, and I'd very much like to know if it was the product of the script, the direction, or the actor. It also helps that every single thing Anansi says is undeniably true.

This is one of the growing number of instances where the casting decision to have Shadow as a person of color instead of as a white man is benefiting the show. Last week we had the lynching, and all of the historically uncomfortable imagery associated with it. This week we have the opening scene on the slave ship unexpectedly echoed later in the episode when Czernobog speaks about race in a way that American's tend to find uncomfortably direct. Technically, Anansi's opening sequence doesn't have anything to do with the episode other than introducing another-God-who-will-be-important-later, but the fact that the beginning of the episode speaks about race so directly gives the discussion about race later in the episode an additional depth that it wouldn't have otherwise had.

It also sets up the concept of duality, of things being separated into black and white, which leads me to my second point.

"Shit. You all don’t know you black yet. You think you just people."

That line, outside from underlining the unfathomable inhumanity of the slave trade, also sets up what I missed about this episode the first time around. You have what you think is one thing, and suddenly it's two things that are artificially divided and set up in opposition to one another. 'Just people' suddenly split into black and white. Czernobog and his brother, divided into being 'the good one' and 'the bad one' by the people around them. The normal, mundane world that Shadow has known, and the world of Gods and beliefs that he's gradually learning exists. This whole episode is about bringing Shadow to the realization that there is a second world, the 'world under the world' to quote Shadow himself, and that those two worlds are simultaneously both separate from one another and both the same thing. As the episode is structured, that's the point of the checkers match. It's a nice symbol for the concept, because it's ostensibly two sides fighting in opposition, and yet the checkers are all equal, as Shadow points out when they're talking at dinner about checkers versus chess.

So, my first take on the episode as regards it existing just to set up things for the rest of the season was both correct and incorrect. Yes, it sets up Anansi, reminds us that Bilquis is still out there, introduces us to Media and tells us Technical Boy's name. But what's important is what it's doing underneath that.

The episode itself is roughly split into halves.  The first half is Shadow tying up loose threads so that he's free to go with Mr. Wednesday, and the second half is setting up the quest for the rest of the season by revealing to us that Wednesday is reaching out to other Gods for some reason.  Shadow's job is going to be to take him from one God to the next so that Wednesday can talk to them. Put like that, it sounds like it's a fairly utilitarian episode, but what I missed was Wednesday's line toward the end. "I'm easing him into it." he tells Zorya Vechernyaya, and that's the point of the episode. This isn't a plot structural cleanup exercise, as I first thought it was. It's the story of how Wednesday gradually breaks Shadow away from his old life and slowly introduces new concepts to him so that he's ready for what's to come. First he lets Shadow see that he's meeting with the mysterious man in the sunglasses but doesn't let him attend, then, once Shadow has understood that, Wednesday lets him attend the meeting with Czernobog. It's a gradual indoctrination, and I think it's nicely handled.

With this in mind, I now firmly believe that he sent Shadow on his own to the store specifically so that Media would reach out to him there, thus introducing Shadow to 'The Opposition,' as it were. They make a lot in this series about how manipulative Wednesday is, but if you watch Ian McShane in the background you can see it happening in real time And by the way, how great was Gillian Anderson as Media? She doesn't exactly sound like Lucy, but she has the look and mannerisms down, and she owns it in a way that you can't help but feel like she just did the world's best Lucy impression. Note also, Media makes a clear distinction between being Lucille Ball and being Lucy Ricardo. Again, this underscores the real world/world of fantasy duality.

So, an episode that appears on the surface to be just doing a job, but which, if you scratch the surface, is doing a hell of a lot with one hand while it distracts you with the other. That's kind of Wednesday in a nutshell, isn't it.

Quotes:

Anansi: "Once upon a time, a man got f**ked." Truthfully, Anansi's whole opening speech could be copied here, but this was a great lead in.

Anansi: "Take swimming lessons. This is how we get stereotypes.”

Shadow: "What the f**k did you do?" Wednesday: "Well, that depends on who you ask."

Wednesday: "You sir, or only obligated to feel bad about that for so long."

Media: "Time and Attention. Better than lamb's blood."

Zorya Vechernyaya: "Family is who you survive with when you need to survive. Even when you do not like them."

Czernobog: "You’re black, right?"

Czernobog: "A shame. You’re my only black friend."

Bits and Pieces:

-- This show specifically, and Fuller generally, use the language of television really well. The transitional shot from Bilquis on her bed to the statue in the museum was worth three pages of explanation about her in a book. Ditto the transition where her body appeared beneath the jewelry in the display case. Everything we really need to know about her is expressed in those two shots.

-- Speaking of Bilquis, I consistently wonder what exactly the casting call notice for this part said. Were the words 'Sex to death' part of it, or did they save that discussion for the second callback?

-- The beautiful and psychedelic transitional montage from Dylan's 'Hard Rain Gonna Fall', up through the universe, into the celestial realms, light splintering in iridescent casc... whoops, check out this erection!! That's kind of the show's aesthetic in a nutshell, isn't it.

-- The shot of Laura, lying in lingerie on the bed like she was selling perfume cutting to the actual unmade bed was also a nice dream v. reality moment. Also, showing a lead character in dreams and illusions is a standard way of keeping an actor as a regular on the show while you're waiting for a big reveal about that character. This is how they kept David Boreanez in the credits for the first three episodes of Buffy season three. I'm just saying.

-- I could have lived without the unrequested dick pic showing up in Shadow's wedding photo. And now I know how every woman on Tinder feels.

-- We don't get any answer as to who saved Shadow from the lynching.

-- Also, this week we have no Mad Sweeney, Audrey, or Technical Boy. I missed the first two.

-- The cinematography on the sequence where Shadow filled the bathtub was very pretty. Naked Ricky Whittle was... also pretty.

-- The shots of Czernobog killing the cows were very upsetting. I know no actual cows were hurt, but still.

-- If you pause on the shopping list, it's all legitimately stuff we see them use over the next couple of episodes.

-- You can tell they're dealing in fantasy – the packing tape dispenser never jammed once.

On closer evaluation, this episode has a lot more going for it than it appeared. The question this begs is, should an episode require closer inspection in order to be good television? There's legitimate room for differences of opinion on this issue.

Three and a half cows which are totally still alive and were not brained with a hammer.

Mikey Heinrich is, among other things, a freelance writer, volunteer firefighter, and roughly 78% water. You can find more of his work at the 42nd Vizsla.

#American Gods #Neil Gaiman #Shadow Moon #Mr. Wednesday #Anansi #American Gods Reviews #Doux Reviews #TV Reviews

[fromtheringapron]

WWF Royal Rumble 1999

Date: January 24, 1999.

Location: The Arrowhead Pond in Anaheim, California.

Attendance: 14,816.

Commentary: Michael Cole & Jerry Lawler. Shane McMahon joined commentary for match 4. 

Results:

1. Big Boss Man defeated Road Dogg. 

2. WWF Intercontinental Championship Match: Ken Shamrock (champion) defeated Billy Gunn. 

3. WWF European Championship Match: X-Pac (champion) defeated Gangrel. 

4. Strap Match for the WWF Women’s Championship: Sable (champion) defeated Luna Vachon (with Shane McMahon).

5. I Quit Match for the WWF Championship: The Rock defeated Mankind (champion) to win the title. 

6. Royal Rumble Match: Vince McMahon won the match by lastly eliminating Steve Austin. Other participants included (in order of appearance): Golga, Droz, Edge, Gillberg, Steve Blackman, Dan Severn, Tiger Ali Singh, The Blue Meanie, Mabel, Road Dogg, Gangrel, Kurrgan, Al Snow, Goldust, The Godfather, Kane, Ken Shamrock, Billy Gunn, Test, Big Boss Man, Triple H, Val Venis, X-Pac, Mark Henry, Jeff Jarrett, D’Lo Brown, Owen Hart, and Chyna. 

Analysis

The 1999 edition of the Royal Rumble may be one of the most memorable in the history of the event. Let me clarify, mind you, that memorable doesn’t necessarily mean great, as this show is far from it. But few capture the spirit of the Attitude Era quite like this one, for better or worse. The WWF is reaching enormous heights in popularity thanks to its brand of crash TV. The fans in the arenas are submerging under a tidal wave of crass, neon signage. The matches are constantly booked with run-ins and outside interference. Storylines move have more twists and turns than a Mario Kart course. When the product isn’t serious and gritty, it’s campy and oversexed. Everything has the vague feeling of a nu-metal concert. Sure, the era’s success carried on into the early 2000s, but you can’t deny the time period in which this show takes place is smack dab in the middle of the Attitude Era vortex.

And you really can’t acknowledge this time period without mentioning Vince Russo, the man responsible for turning the WWF into a barrage of Jerry Springer theatrics and all the bad taste that comes along with it. Under Russo’s watch, every member of the roster is given a storyline It’s wonderful to learn that, say, Steve Blackman and Dan Severn are feuding or that the J.O.B. Squad and The Brood are feuding. It should be noted, however, that this doesn’t mean every member of the roster is given a good storyline because it’s still Russo at the end of day and there’s going to be content that’s varying degrees of problematic. Still, giving everyone something to do is a great idea and certainly one of the hallmarks of the Attitude Era that WWE should implement today.

On the other hand, one thing is they should not implement today is basically try to stuff an entire episode of Raw into the Royal Rumble match, which is what happens here. As I explained in my ranking of the Rumbles, the match isn’t boring. There’s just so much going on that there isn’t really a lull but, amidst all of that, the actual Rumble feels like the least important thing. Sure, there’s all the intrigue of Austin vs. McMahon at its zenith, but it’s a story so big that it can’t help but overshadow considerable portions of the match. Plus, it leaves the winner options pretty limited. Either Austin wins for the third year in a row, a logical choice but wouldn’t fly in an era that would deliver swerves just to avoid the predictability, or McMahon wins, which everyone would know to be a ruse the instant it happens. Literally anyone else winning would seem out-of-the-blue.

The Royal Rumble undercard, no matter how good it may be, always feels like something to pass the time until we get to the main attraction. This show isn’t an exception to the rule, but it does feature one of the most legitimately brutal contests of its era: the I Quit match between The Rock and Mankind. We, 20 years later, know so much more about the dangers of unprotected chair spots but the late ‘90s was a much different time where wrestlers were upping the ante on risky high spots just to pop a crowd or a TV rating, much to the detriment of their own health. It’s weird how there’s a spot where Mankind gets thrown into an electrical circuit board and people kinda forget about that now. The real spot of the match is Mick Foley is shedding years off his career, and possibly life, by taking a series of legit, unplanned chair shots to the head. It’s hard to watch now, but it’s the rare occasion where an undercard Rumble match may be more remembered than the Rumble itself.

As a whole, Royal Rumble 1999 isn’t the most satisfying Attitude Era show, but it does gives you a good taste of an extremely popular time in wrestling history. Just don’t try to consume the whole thing all at once. For every good idea in the era, there’s a bunch that don’t work, and like Mick Foley on that January night, the WWF doesn’t seem to know when to call it quits.

My Random Notes

Of course, this show’s coverage on the documentary Beyond the Mat is a huge reason why it’s so memorable. Does it get any more real than watching Mick Foley take all those chair shots as his children look on in terror?

This show immediately got me thinking about the WWF Attitude game I had for the Game Boy Color, which I rage quit several times because I never knew how to pin an opponent or get up off the mat.

I had the privilege of watching this show live on pay-per-view and I was so pissed that Mr. McMahon won the Rumble that I swore off wrestling, which only lasted like two seconds because it didn’t stop me from watching WrestleMania XV. Whoops!

Ugh. I also wanted Gangrel to win the European championship so badly and he got so close on that botched pinfall. I was such a mark for him. Heck, I’m still a mark for him.

Oh, and looking back now, I wish Luna Vachon was women’s champ at some point. It’s actually next-level sad that storyline never came full-circle.

Kudos to the dudes in the front row bopping along to the Oddities and The Brood entrance theme. I bet they were delightful at, I’m assuming, the several Korn concerts they attended back in the day.

Imagine being so pathetic that you actually find the time to make a sign that merely says “Sable is Old!” and then wave said sign just so it can be seen in front of a live pay-per-view audience. Some fan was that pathetic on this particular January evening. I mean, wow.

I can’t just not mention the amazing Mr. McMahon training montages leading up to this show. I still quote the whole “I HATE AUSTIN!” thing pretty often.  

Terri Runnels accompanies D’Lo Brown to the ring by, um, performing an interpretive dance?!?

You know what? Kane’s character development throughout 1999 is amazing to watch. They did such a good job of making him a more relatable, human character.  Easily one of the best parts of the Rumble is when he wrecks shit and receives a major pop for it. For someone whose character is so prone to jokes and truly execrable storylines, it’s great to remember all the times when he’s been, excuse the pun, fire.

On Chyna entering the Rumble: This seems like a fairly minor step forward now in the time of the all-women’s Royal Rumble but for as much as Chyna is thrown in the discussion of trailblazers in the Women’s Revolution, she’s still pretty much on her own level. Sure, there’s all the talk of her as the first woman to do this and that, and rightly so, but nobody has quite thrown up a middle finger to the whole concept of gender quite like Chyna did. No wonder she’s a queer icon.

#royal rumble #attitude era #mick foley #the rock

[trifoliate-undergrowth]

Episode 4.2: Steve: The Intergalactic Kevin

DM: By popular demand, one night only, a largely improv emergency meeting. If you drive me to alcoholism I’m billing you for therapy.

T: M, if you get sued for therapy bills, it’s coming out of the wedding budget. (T and M got engaged over Christmas break)

Everyone: OOOOOOO

DM: Corellia is one of the major core worlds, in a system with 4 others, but it’s the largest and closest to the main star; part of the Republic but maintains its own navy. Its main specialty is shipping and transportation.

Grif: OK, here’s the thing. I’ve been thinking about what you said, Rralwarr; the ship is a death trap, what if we turn it on them? Like, booby-trap it with bombs, set it to fly off somewhere on autopilot, and when they board the ship it’ll blow up with them in it hopefully. Now, there’s a couple more things you guys will hate.

Taveau: Oh I’m liking it so far.

Grif: You won’t. We’ll need to leave some things behind to make it look like we died. Your armor for one. 

Taveau: Ex-CUSE me

Grif: ...and three bodies off the black market. Also a wookiee pelt. 

Rralwarr: HOLD UP NOW. If I see someone with a wookiee pelt, I’m going to rip their arms off. 

Taveau: Grif? You... seem to be taking this well. Uh, more or less. So, uh. I’ve got some stuff to mention. 

Grif: Go ahead. 

Taveau:  Here’s what I noticed... First, we assist in killing a member of Death Watch; they’re killed with a blast to the throat. A short amount of time passes, and in that time, two things happen: we get a message from Death Watch, showing that they know who we are. And someone kills your mother with a blast to the throat, which is exactly the way that we killed the Death Watch guy down on Hypori. It doesn’t seem like a coincidence to me. It seems like they’re trying to send you a message. And if I’m right, that means there’s already someone on Alderaan, and they know where to find your family.  I still think we should change ships, because if there’s anyone following us, it might throw them off, and we’ll have fewer of these guys waiting for us when we get to Alderaan. But we should do it fast.

Rralwarr: Right. Here’s my concern, Grif; I think these guys are smarter than you think. I don’t think your dad is safe, and I think he said what he did at gunpoint. Your dad isn’t that stupid. There’s something else going on here. 

H, OOC: Rralwarr feels torn that he cannot uphold all of his duties at once. He legit thinks Grif’s idea is mildly OK, aside from the wookiee pelt, but no matter what they do they’re going to end up fighting the Mandalorians.

Grif: Right. So, any way we can get back at them now is a good start. We need to lose the ship that they’re tracking, and we need to get back there as quickly as possible. This idea seems the best for doing that without getting anyone else in danger. If we just leave the ship on Corellia, we could be implicating the people who end up with it. 

Rralwarr still doesn’t like the idea of wookiee pelts. He leaves the cockpit. 

Taveau spins around in his pilot chair. “So. Uh, he’s upset. How much family do you have on... Alderaan, is it?” 

Grif: Yes. My dad and uh.. a bunch of siblings. 

Taveau: Oh, that’s not good. If it was just your dad they’d be more likely to keep him alive to use against you. If you’ve got multiple family members they could start killing them off at any time. 

No one questions Taveau’s knowledge of Death Watch, to my surprise; apparently they just assume it’s cultural knowledge and accept it. Taveau is very relieved about this. 

We land on Corellia, and Grif’s current plan involves selling the ship to someone, because “we need the credits”, but setting the autopilot so it flies away before they can claim it, and hopefully getting off the planet before we’re arrested for this little scam. Taveau doesn’t like it but doesn’t have a better idea. Rralwarr really, really doesn’t like it but is in a similar position. 

Taveau leaves his helmet in the cockpit, so he can have an excuse to run back into the ship after it’s officially been sold and grab it (and also set the autopilot at the same time). Additionally, with his poncho covering most of his armor, he can walk around town looking like your average shady individual, and not a distinctly Mandalorian brand of shady. Upon us asking what the chances of being attacked around here are: 

DM: There is pretty heavy police presence here, CorSec does not take kindly to disruptions. ...(repeats, pointing at M/Grif): CorSec does not take kindly to disruptions...

M: That’s why we need to get out of here fast after we set the autopilot :) 

DM: ...It’s not likely that Death Watch would prefer to start a firefight here. You’re heading into the Corellian Engineering Corp. headquarters, yes? You are immediately accosted by at least 3 dealers, complimenting your hair, your robes, and waving information pamphlets at you. 

Grif: Thank you! Lovely! I’ll consider it. One moment. (OOC: can I roll perception to see who has the best deal?) 

DM: yeah go ahead. (he rolls high) You notice this one guy standing back a bit, close to the wall-- 

M: I GO OVER TO HIM 

DM: What do you say? 

Grif: Ah! Interesting tactic, not rushing me~ 

DM: ...Roll charisma. (fail) Yeah he just kinda... gives you a slightly offended look, says “I’m busy” and walks away. 

M: Oh. 

Meanwhile, Rralwarr is hanging out in the courtyard near our ship, trying to keep an eye on our surroundings. He rolls a 9 on perception. 

DM: ...Yeah, you don’t see anything unusual. You do notice a very fascinating fountain. You stare at that for a while. 

Grif, meanwhile, heads for the table marked “sales and trade-ins” and identifies his ship type to the droid attendant. He’s sent out with a scanner team to check the condition of the ship. 

Taveau, who’d started off to check out one of the other dealers, hears that Grif has it handled and, relieved that he doesn’t have to talk to anyone, rejoins Rralwarr. Taveau also manages to roll a 9 on perception (2, originally, with modifiers). He, too, becomes enamored with the fountain. He stands by Rralwarr and contemplates his place in the universe. While Grif accomplishes things, the two of them gaze at the fountain together. 

Grif chats up the scanner team foreman while the rest of the dudes set up the scanner. Eventually they call him inside to look at something and Grif waits outside, tucking his hands inside his sleeves and gripping the tiny concealed blaster he keeps up one of his sleeves (which I only heard about very recently, and this makes me wonder if Taveau has noticed it. Possibly, as it seems like something he’d notice. But possibly not, because as we all know, he’s kind of clueless.) 

M: Grif feels edgy. 

DM: Do you mean he feels On Edge or is he just... intentionally acting as edgy as possible 

H: Oh it’s definitely that

M: Edgy, probably. I mean it’s not like he’s actually going to shoot anyone, he’s just gripping his gun and feeling edgy for the sake of edginess. 

There’s muffled conversation from inside. oh, really?...huh...well, that’s... interesting...

The foreman reappears, carrying a small device in his hand, and tells Grif that the ship seems to be in pretty good reselling condition, but the scan found a hyperspace tracker on the bottom of the engine. He’s guessing that they bought it from a secondhand dealer, as some of the less-scrupulous of those will often attach a tracker to a ship so they can track it down if payments aren’t met. He also volunteers that it only transmits when in hyperspace, and gives it to Grif when he asks. 

(Lore-wise this tracker bugs me a bit because hyperspace technology was considered brand new in The Last Jedi, which is considerably later than the time period we’re playing in. I then consider the fact that we’re playing a game for fun and not accuracy and that it’s a cool concept and I tell myself to take a chill pill.)

Foreman: Also, you have excellent taste in rum. 

Grif: Oh, yes! Why don’t we get it down, actually, to celebrate the sale? 

Foreman: That’s not a bad idea. I’ll send the boys back early. 

The Rest of the Party: * C O N C E R N * 

M: guys I’m gonna be fine don’t worry. 

And in fact Grif did not die. Grif didn’t even drink (rum). He had water, and he gave the rest of the bottle to the foreman as a gift, considering he couldn’t let Rralwarr see it with him anyway. The foreman, for his part, left in an excellent mood and promised to give his ship a really good report. 

I think this may have been the first time Grif succeeded with charisma. M comments that, thanks to the character change, he’s more focused than usual. 

We reunite and discuss an alternate plan, now that we have the tracker: take it with us on the new ship, hyperspace-jump to the middle of absolutely nowhere, fling the tracker off the ship and then hightail it to Alderaan. Taveau grabs his helmet and, taking the tracker along, we trade in our old ship for a shiny new one. 

DM asks if we’d like to name the ship. H/Rralwarr don’t have ideas. M goes “yeah I don’t think Grif really cares right now.” So it’s up to me. 

“...Steve?” (laughter. The DM is going to accept it) “No wait. The.... The Intergalactic Kevin.” (H really likes that one but I feel like I should come up with a name that isn’t a joke) “Wait, I’ve got it: Blindsider.” 

A good name, as Taveau sincerely hopes that they’ll be able to reach Alderaan undetected in this ship. Everyone likes the name, the DM okays it, and we have a newly-christened ship (with two sonic showers). 

Someone suggests that we get a party pet, some kind of space dog, and name it Steve: The Intergalactic Kevin. 

Rralwarr, a little calmed down now that we’ve found a plan that doesn’t involve massive amounts of deception, swindling, and disrespecting the remains of the dead, goes to talk to Grif as Taveau is starting it up. 

Grif: I’m gonna be fine, it’s just.. this entire day all I’ve been able to think about has been Alderaan. I wanna go home, but also I wanna stay away as much as possible. And when I think of Alderaan I think of mom, but she won’t be there...it’ll just be a house, it won’t be the same. And I still kinda wanna get back at those Mandalorians. But I know we don’t have the power to do that, and it just frustrates me.

The two share a moment. The moment is interrupted: 

Taveau: HEY GUYS ARE WE TAKING OFF? 

Grif: ..YeS

Rralwarr: Grif, I know you’re under a lot of stress, and I don’t blame you for your suggestions, and while your suggestion regarding the wookie pelts deeply offends me, I know you were more concerned with getting us off here safely than with how you did it, and I understand. Don’t do that again, though. You know very well how wookies treat their dead. 

Grif: I know, trust me, humans are the same way. I’m sorry, I know that was out of place, and... I wish I could say that I wouldn’t have done it.

Rr: We’re at war, things happen... I didn’t have a better idea at the time.

Grif: also I’m still not certain that people won’t get hurt because of our ship. 

Rr: there’s no perfect way to handle this. Let’s think of it this way: we’re going back to protect the rest of your family, they’re all targets; we’re all in danger now, we need to make sure they’re safe.

We take off, make the jump, and stop to dispose of the tracker. Taveau rolls really well on piloting and I decide that this ship has really easy controls. Here’s where Mistakes Happen. 

Me: Can I do the honors of yeeting the tracker into space? 

DM: Absolutely. There’s, like, a waste disposal hatch, and you-- 

H: You should roll dex for that!

Me: What? For shoving something down a garbage chute? 

H: Yes. Because it’d be really funny if you failed. 

Me:...ok

DM: Excellent! Roll! 

Me: 

Me: a 1 

H: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Me: WHAT. WHAT HAPPENS TO ME. 

DM: ....which hand are you using? 

Me, recognizing that this is an opportunity for mercy and deciding not to take it: I mean realistically probably my dominant hand, which is my right. 

DM: It’s stuck. 

Rralwarr: I grab your arm and pull you out!

DM: And now your wrist is broken. 

Me: GREAT. THAT WAS MY SHOOTING HAND. 

Rralwarr treats me with his medic skills and fixes me up with a wrist brace. I’m told that I’ll be alright in a few days (presumably Rralwarr inflicted some sort of rapid-heal treatment upon me?), but I should, in the meantime, avoid stressing my hand. Specifically, I shouldn’t fire any weapons with recoil. 

Yeah, good luck with that. 

As we end the session, I ask H if Rralwarr has any painkillers. H says gleefully that he does indeed, and that he’s looking forward to seeing a high Taveau. 

masterpost

#WELL THEN #star wars RPG #Taveau #YEP #slowly catching up to the present #this isn't the Taveau thing I was writing yesterday that's still coming

[srona58]

TAYLOR IN REPUTATION IS JAY GATSBY!!!

No disrespect to cats or food or sleep or Florida or hockey or Chris Pratt or Star Wars or Mark Hamill or Christmas or snow or porgs or Robert Downey Jr or cheesecake or even my Avy, but Reputation literally just brought my two favorite things on this planet together and I want to cry: Taylor Swift and the Great Gatsby. 

 Don’t believe me?  It took me an entire listen all the way through but I AM DYING; Gatsby is my all time favorite book and I have written about it, read it, and watched the movies thousands of times…so, let me know what you think.

Let’s start off simple.  For those of you who haven’t read the Great Gatsby, it’s a dramatic love story that doesn’t have a very happy ending.  Jay Gatsby is a rich, yet shady to the public eye, man who throws parties for the girl he used to love before he went to war.  He moved near her and eventually they got back together…only to end up in a crazy, mixed up tragic ending.  Daisy is married to Tom, but Tom is seeing Myrtle..this will all make sense later on.   So, if you don’t want spoilers, don’t read ahead…but please do anyway, haha.

The book/movie had a few themes that were repetitive – the color green, which included hope and wealth, the locations, and giant parties representing the 20s.  Start with So It Goes, Dancing With Our Hands Tied, and Dress - all mention the same color gold, which is also equal to the idea of wealth and money that the color green gives in Gatsby.  The lyrics in SIG are ‘gold cage, hostage to my feelings’, DWOHT says ‘painted my golden’, and a ‘golden tattoo’ is mentioned in Dress.  

Now, take notes of the songs Ready For It, Delicate and Dress – all discuss the theme of an island or the east and west side.  In RFI, she talked about moving to an island, and in Delicate she talks once about the ‘east side, where you at?’ and later says ‘third floor on the west side’ – yes, she is talking about New York, I assume, but the East and West Egg are mentioned over and over again as the home bases for the characters in Gatsby. Last: in This is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things, King Of My Heart, and New Year’s Day, the lyrics are almost a mirror to the party life of Gatsby.  TIWWCHNT is a complete match, using lyrics like ‘it was so nice throwing big parties’, ‘everyone swimming in a champagne sea’, ‘bass beat rattling the chandelier, feeling so Gatsby for that whole year’.  This is probably the only time I’m going to mention this song in this rant, though, since it’s solely about the parties when discussing this Gatsby idea.  KOMH mentions fancy cars and the idea of ‘fancy me not fancy stuff’ which is how Daisy sees past the parties to see Gatsby for him.  NYD discusses ‘glitter on the floor after the party’, which again, is obviously a party mention.

Now, here we go with chronological things that I feel line up to the story of Gatsby and how Reputation follows this.

In Ready For It, the question of ‘ready for it?’ definitely reminds me of when Daisy asks ‘Gatsby?  What Gatsby?’ in the opening of the book/movie; this sets up the whole story, as does this first song on the album.

Lets move onto End Game.  The words ‘big reputation’ are repeated over and over again, which, yes, is the album title, but in Gatsby, Jay is always given a bad wrap by people he doesn’t know, and he knows the rumors being shared about him – example, when Nick is trying to locate Gatsby at his first party and he is told several things, including murder, about the man before they meet by other guests.  Gatsby definitely has ‘big enemies’, like Taylor has in End Game.

I Did Something Bad and Don’t Blame Me both remind me of the song Lana Del Rey did for the latest movie version of Gatsby, ‘Young and Beautiful’ - they both have that mystical backing vocals.  Now, I Did Something Bad links back to the reputation of Gatsby/Taylor, saying ‘cause for every lie I tell them, they tell me three’; she is saying the can always one up her with more rumors or lies.   Then, Don’t Blame Me states that ‘your love made me crazy’ – yes, we can relate this back to Blank Space, but in the end of the book/film, he also goes over the edge and gets angry, eventually scaring Daisy off.

With Delicate, Taylor asks ‘is it cool that I said all that’ – which directly uses the word cool, as Daisy does when she tells Gatsby he always ‘looks so cool’.  She also talks about pretending someone is ‘mine all the damn time,’ as Gatsby does the entire time they are separated and he is pursuing getting Daisy back.  Gorgeous also uses the word cool, then mentions ‘consequence[s] of you touching my hand in a darkened room’, which could relate to when Gatsby and Daisy go off to the woods during the first party of his that Daisy attends.

Let’s head into So It Goes, which furthers the discussion of the party in which they escape together in secret, hiding from Tom, Daisy’s husband. Taylor sings ‘all eyes on us’ and ‘but when you get me alone, it’s so simple’, which is how easy it is for Daisy to fall right back into place with Gatsby once she realized he is living near her.  She also writes about ‘doing bad things’ which could foreshadow how Gatsby and Daisy get in trouble near the end, but NO, I do not feel like this mimics how the book/movie ends…completely.

Look What You Made Me Do was our first single from the album and while I love this, it also covers a big part of the Gatsby story line.  ‘You said the gun was mine’ directly relates to how everyone blamed Gatsby for killing Mertyl, when in reality, it was Daisy but no one knew.  This is the part of the book/movie where everything turns from good to bad, and for the album, this is where it goes from good to bad and is the beginning of the demise of Gatsby…so, turning points at the same place?

Getaway Car follows, which ironically follows the story line of Gatsby, too!  Yes, Taylor is probably referring to Joe saving her, BUT it also can relate to Gatsby and Daisy using the car to escape back to New York after Jay raises his temper and scares Daisy off while in the city.  The song starts off with ‘I wanted to leave him, I needed a reason’ and Daisy wanted to leave Tom and was waiting for Gatsby to tell him and give her a reason to.    ‘We’d never get far’ refers to Gatsby and Daisy never getting far with their relationship, as Taylor hadn’t with her past relationships.  Then, she writes ‘I shoulda known I’d be the first to leave’, as Daisy leaves before Gatsby dies, knowing she could never truly be with him.  The other big parts in this song are ‘but you weren’t thinkin, and I was just drinkin’, well, he was runnin’ after us, I was screaming’ and ‘it hit you like a shotgun, shot to the heart’ – the first just sets up the car ride home where Daisy is wildly driving after they were all drinking in the hotel in the city, and the latter is the scene where Gatsby is, quite literally, shot and killed in the heart by Mertyl’s husband.  Last, one of the lyrics is ‘the last time you saw me’, and after that scene I just described, Gatsby never saw Daisy again.

Continuing…  Dancing With Our Hands Tied uses the phrase ‘love you in secret’, for obvious reasons.  It also says ‘nothing in the world that could stop it’, which is what Gatsby though, because, after all, he was seeing the world through the eyes of God…but that’s a different in-book concept.  Later on in the song it talks about ‘I’d hold you as the water rushes in if I could dance with you again’ – Gatsby hears the phone ring while in the pool before he is shot and whispers Daisy’s name, even though it was Nick calling; he is shot and killed with the hope that Daisy had come back, and as he sinks into the WATER, he is thinking about the past few days he spent DANCING with Daisy and trying to get her back.

Call It What You Want, a personal favorite, generally relates to the incident with the gun at the end and how Gatsby was finally taken down by Mertyl’s husband.  His ‘castle crumbled [literally] overnight’, and he didn’t bring any weapons when his killer brought the gun.  After he died the windows of the house were boarded up – ironically after the shit show of a storm their lives became.  AND ‘late November’ is in the fall (even though Gatsby is shot near Labor Day).

And now the last song on the album, New Year’s Day, is the one that differs, but it is GOOD.   The one big line that stands out to me is ‘don’t read the last page’ – DO NOT READ THE LAST PAGE OF GATSBY, because it delivers the end of his life, and states it is time to move on, not be ‘borne back ceaselessly into the past’.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY LAST POINT! As a recap…one of my FAVORITE THEMES that I have not mentioned yet is the idea of repeating the past.  In the book/movie, Nick tells Gatsby he ‘can’t repeat the past’, in which Gatsby replies ‘can’t repeat the past?  Why, of course you can!”  He will never let go of that hope of getting Daisy back.  I Did Something Bad says ‘I’d do it over and over again if I could’.  Don’t Blame Me uses ‘I would cross the line, I would waste my time, I would lose my mind’, talking about how desperate Gatsby is to go back to how things were.  AND in Dancing With Our Hands Tied, the lyrics are ‘I could’ve spent forever’.

AND THE KICKER?  She blatantly uses the name Gatsby in TIWWCHNT and even says ‘now I’m your daisy’ in Don’t Blame Me –  SHE IS NOW JOE’S DAISY, AS HE DOESN’T WANT TO LET HER GO, EITHER.  But in a healthy way…so DON’T READ THE LAST PAGE AND KILL THE STORY – the story will go on!!!

IN CONCLUSION, Taylor is the epitome of Gatsby, from starting as a party thrower to having rumors spread about her, to desperately clinging for love and trying to repeat the past until she finally killed herself (the ‘old Taylor’), only she is REWRITING HER OWN STORY and not killing herself off…she is simply jumping characters and being in love.

THERE YA GO, THIS IS MY FAVORITE ALBUM BY FAR.  PLEASE REBLOG AND TAG @taylorswift

#taylor swift #gatsby #reputation

[feynites]

Can you do a top 10 assholes of Dragon age and give us the reasons why their on the list and why some are worse then others?

Hmm.

Okay. I thought about this, and I realized that it would be very hard to quantify a lot of this stuff, because most characters in this series are assholes in at least some way. And how anyone would rate their asshole tendencies is bound to vary a lot based on personal values and perspective. For example, someone might find Aveline’s tendency to kinkshame Isabela much more asshole-y than Oghren’s inappropriate sexual overtures. And someone else might just be like ‘okay but Sten killed an entire family for no good reason’. Which would then lead us straight to A List villains, basically, because if we’re getting into the really ugly stuff, that’s who we’ve got.

So, I’ve decided to try and rate this list by two major deciding factors.

One is consequence - i.e. how many people did they get killed, how much stuff was destroyed, how much suffering was created.

The other is remorse/motivation - i.e. why did they do things that led to pain and suffering, what (if any) regrets do they have, and do they go about attempting to atone for it?

On that note, the list is below the cut. To disclaim - obviously this is going to contain some character criticism. If you see a character on this list and don’t want to read about it, feel free to skip their entry. Or skip the whole list altogether. This is by no means an attempt to shame anybody for liking certain characters or anything along those lines.

10. There are too many assholes who could fill this bottom slot, honestly. Petty, individually horrific people whose only saving grace is that they were ultimately not that important. Vaughan Kendells, Quentin, Magister Erimond, Bartrand Tethras, Bhelen Aeducan, the Viddasala, etc. So this is actually just going to be a reserve slot to acknowledge that there are a lot of assholes in Thedas. You’re all Number Ten in my heart.

9. Loghain Mac Tyr

Turning away from a questionable battle situation is a debatable tactic. Not wanting to permit Orlesian forces across Ferelden borders? Also worthy of discussion. Selling alienage elves into slavery and framing and putting out a bounty on the only people who are capable of dealing with the darkspawn threat at your doorstep, on the other hand, are pretty hard actions to bounce back from. Especially when you are a man who is absolute shit at going ‘whoops, my bad’. Nearly causing the destruction of Ferelden gets Loghain to Number Nine, but no higher.

8. Rendon Howe

I mean… if someone were to distil ‘essence of asshole’ into its purest form and inject it into a mosquito, I’m pretty sure the end result would be something like Rendon Howe. Spiritually, he should be top of this list. Fortunately for the rest of Thedas, though, he ultimately lacked the power he’d need to get there.

7. Magister Danarius

Slave owning rapist who is entirely sane and acting of his own volition and cruelty? Why isn’t he higher on this list? Well, mostly because of scale. But scale’s also part of the reason why I wanted him on here. Danarius may not have had the opportunity or means that some people on this list have had to inflict his dickishness on vast swaths of people, but he embodies a certain irrefutable, personal kind of evil that is inextricably tied to such things. And, y’know, he did his best to be the worst kind of human he could be with the tools he had. Honestly, he is probably far worse, as a person, than a lot of people higher on this list. He would have been Corypheus if given half a chance. But he wasn’t given that chance. I knew he definitely needed to be on here, though.

6. Solas

Solas gets to a middle point on this list, and he is mostly here for his actions regarding Corypheus, Felassan, and Briala’s eluvian network, and the far-reaching scope of basically everything he does. His future actions are still up in the air, and his confirmed up-to-date actions contain a balance of significant good and bad, and he shows a lot of remorse (though it’s not always clear what for, precisely). Because of his mystery, it’s hard to rank the full consequences or asshole-ness of his character, yet. He’s the guy who put up the Veil in what was probably an act of desperation, he may have saved the world (possibly more than once), and he has also threatened to destroy it. So, he’s at Number Six for now, because man is this a steep competition.

5. Grand Cleric Elthina & Meredith Stannard

Posts five and four on this list are going to double-up, if only because a lot of the crimes, consequences, and attendant assholery were group efforts. Together, Elthina and Meredith both sought to seize control over Kirkwall, with Elthina’s eye likely towards being named Divine in the long run, and Meredith’s interest mostly veering more towards being able to kill and torment any and all mages as she pleased. Not only did an entire city suffer under their combined hubris and cruelty, but Meredith’s use of red lyrium and the subsequent social conflicts ignited by their actions have had negative ripple effects throughout Thedas, with neither of them showing the least bit of genuine repentance or remorse. 

4. Empress Celene & Gaspard de Chalons

There is something especially asshole-ish about people who will throw countless other lives to the winds for the sake of being the winner of a game, and Celene and Gaspard are pretty much this concept distilled and flavoured in ‘diplomacy’ and ‘military’ forms. Still, they only just beat out Elthina and Meredith, and in part because the both of them had much more power and influence to leverage in their actions, with an entire empire at their fingertips, rather than a city. The corruption of Orlais persists, and the plight of the elven people has worsened, thanks to these genocidal reprobates.

3. Mythal

Now, this is Mythal I am talking about - the ancient elven ‘goddess’, not Flemeth. Flemeth is surely an asshole, but the jury is largely still out on how much of an asshole. To some extent there are still a lot of questions about Mythal, too, so this entry is really more of a joint effort between Mythal and the other ancient elven gods of her crew. But she gets to hold the name slot until we know more about them, as well, because all evidence points to Mythal having established the ancient slave empire of the elves. And while she seems to have eventually come to regret it, the fact that she probably got the ball rolling on everything from slavery to darkspawn to magical corruption, puts her here for now.

2. Corypheus

Corypheus is an asshole in so many senses that, as a character, he’s almost dull. The dude has zero remorse, his actions have quite probably directly resulted in the current Blight situation in Thedas (though it’s doubtful he’s actually responsible for the taint), he’s a prick who owned slaves and murders people left and right, and even the other assholes in this list would probably think he was worth killing. The only reason he’s not number one is because, as much chaos and suffering as Corypheus has caused, there’s one other individual who has managed to have a worse impact on the world - though the jury’s still out on what his personality was actually like.

1. Emperor Kordillus Drakon I

One of the biggest fucking assholes in Thedosian history is the guy who founded the Orlesian Empire and the Chantry, and cemented nearly every reprehensible tendency of the current power structures of the world. Drakon is not technically even a minor character - he only exists in the lore - but I hate him. I hate him so much. In a post-Andraste world where slavery was out of fashion in most of Thedas and various faiths and tribes were making their way, Drakon rose up, and like most conquerors, immediately began murdering the shit out of people who couldn’t fight back, and creating institutions of slavery that used more tactful turns of phrase to disguise what they were. The consequences of Drakon’s rise to power, and how he went about it, are defining conflicts throughout Thedas even so long after his death. Thedas is, in no small part, a violent, war-torn nation thanks to the institutions which Drakon put in place, and he had no reason for doing any of it except that he really liked the idea of being God King of Everything.

#Anonymous

[dedalvs]

You've made your disdain for onions abundantly clear, but what are your thoughts on celery?

Funny you should ask! I was just thinking about this. In the days before the dawn of humankind, the vice admiral of the Great Light looked out upon the Earth and smiled. So pleased was he by the creation of the Great Light that he sent out an invitation to all the vegetation on the Earth to a great feast he was to hold in his castle. He spent the next two weeks preparing, and on the day of the feast, all the vegetation showed up: cucumbers, plums, mint leaf, artichokes—all of them. There was a jovial air in the castle, and everyone enjoyed themselves talking, laughing, dancing, and feasting on the original food of the Earth (kestwa, malador, sweet disti, laffa, etc.). As they finished eating, the vice admiral raised his hands for silence. “My friends!” he said. “We have such a perfect existence, that I have decided to bestow upon you a great gift!” A murmur arose.”Today I give you the gift of flavor!” The murmur grew to a general roar of confusion, as no one knew what this meant. “This is a new concept, I know, but I will show you what I mean. Let us start with my good friend Pineapple!” And so the mighty pineapple stood and strode proudly up to the vice admiral. The vice admiral looked at him and said, “My dear Pineapple! Thank you for being you. I now give you…flavor!” There was a frisson as a smell and sensation rushed through the air: the original sensation of the flavor of pineapple. The attendants were overcome, and instantly started leaping from their chairs, unable to contain themselves and excited to claim their own flavor. The vice admiral laughed and raised his hands again, “One at a time, one at a time! I promise I will get to each and every one of you!”

And good as his word, so he did! He delivered sweet flavors to the mango, the strawberry, and the banana; fresh, crisp flavors to the apple, the cucumber, and the proud, proud carrot; earth flavors to the potato, the beet, and the radish; and even pestilential flavors to the durian fruit and the onion, who were somehow pleased by this. He continued on, giving a flavor to each and every vegetable and fruit and gourd and root, ending finally with the avocado, to which he gave the flavor “vague”. And at the end he said, “And so, my dear friends, I thank you for coming, and wish you a wondrous and beautiful future filled with fun and flavor!” And the vegetation cheered and thanked him, with tears in their eyes, pits, and kernels, and they all went back to their homes.

Now, what flavor did the celery get, you may ask? Perhaps I can answer this question by telling you what the celery was up to during the great feast at the vice admiral’s castle.

To put it bluntly, the celery was asleep. It was up all night worrying about what it was going to wear the next day (hint: the vegetation didn’t wear clothing, it not having been invented yet) that it didn’t sleep a wink, and when the time to leave came, the celery was sound asleep in the middle of its floor. And there it remained until late that night when all the other vegetation was returning. When the vice admiral realized the celery hadn’t attended, he was so hurt and shut up his castle forever, returning to the future whence he came, and taking with him the secret of flavor, which he gave to a character in a Futurama episode, who later shared it with Bender.

So, as for what flavor the celery got? None. It got no flavor. At all. As a result, it is less flavorful than plain water—even less flavorful than the vaguely flavored avocado which can win fans through hypnosis only.

So, to answer your question, what are my thoughts on celery? It is food. It is plain food. If I had to eat it to keep myself alive, I wouldn’t mind, because all it has is a texture. And strings. No idea why they decided to add strings to celery, but that’s not my business. It’s been observed and scientifically tested that you can feed celery to a sleeping human and they won’t notice. The celery’s favorite color is clear. If you give a stalk of celery to a cat it just confuses them. They asked a million American football fans what they preferred—a football game that ends in a tie or celery—and they went with ties in football because they were “more definitive”. Celery is used as a vehicle for peanut butter and crab salad because it’s considered impolite to eat either substance with one’s hands in public, and because with a spoon, it’s impossible to ensure party goers don’t double dip. The great thing about using celery for this purpose is that it has absolutely no flavor, so it’s the same as just eating peanut butter or crab salad—just with added strings to remind you that life is unfair. (Seriously, think about any other food on the planet where you’d say, “Damn! I want to put either peanut butter or crab salad on that! Doesn’t matter which, since this food goes with either peanut butter or crab salad equally well!”)

Now don’t take this to mean that I hate celery. How could I? How could any? They had to stop giving it to babies because babies exposed to celery in the first couple months didn’t realize they were eating anything, and had trouble thereafter recognizing what food was, and how eating worked. If celery were a person and you asked me to date it, I’d say, “I have no opinion”—and I’m married! I mean if it’s there, I guess I’ll take it, because boy howdy, do I love getting strings of stuff stuck in my teeth. How satisfying! It’s like, “Hey, girl! You want to feel like you came out of the bathroom after flossing but left some of that floss stuck in your teeth?” Sign me up for some of that!

But I guess the best thing about its lack of flavor is it doesn’t shove it in your face, you know? It’s an extremely subtle complete lack of flavor. It’s like if someone goes to an award show wearing a folded over bed sheet, but arrives in an unopened cardboard box, so you don’t even see the sheet—or the person. So you’ve got to hand it to celery for that. Like, good on celery for not being all showy about its total absence of flavor.

So those are some of my thoughts on celery. I have others, but this isn’t really the time or place to discuss them. Thank you for your query, and please have a wonderful day on my behalf.

#celery #flavor #lack thereof #Anonymous