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sonicwarfareofficial-blog · 7 years

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Sonic Warfare Chapter 2

He looked...so much meatier in real life. His features were more leathery, and he had a turkey neck. Eggman stirred up from his small forced slumber, saw the president, and screamed.

“Finally! I’m rescued! I have been trying to do research in my lab when this blue punk tried to vandalize my work! Look at all this terror and destruction he’s done to the ice caps… oh the humanity!

Imagine what horrible changes the climate will go through due to this.”

“I don’t believe in Global Warming. The snow will refreeze as time goes I imagine. Fires die out within time.” The president winked at the hedgehog. “ Global warming? I say global winning!”

While the president stood next to the Sonic, Eggman was being handcuffed by his agents.

“It’s cold here, big guy!” Papi Trump exclaims, “How ‘bout you take a seat in my luxury helicopter, it’s pretty yuuuge”.

Sonic would have protested and questioned the faux-tanned man, but he felt as if he needed to go with him. Most of the time when the president got in touch with him, it was due to a dire crisis that only the hedgehog and his comrades could fix.

However, Donald Trump was a fairly new president. What would he see as trouble to his Americans, or to mankind?

The hedgehog steps into the dually propelled machine that is the size of a large house with wide wings. The guards follow the president in with the doctor. ¨Have a seat, big guy” Trump insists. Sonic seats himself on a couch softer than Eggman’s mustache, partially sinking into the cushion, and faces the president who seats himself facing Sonic back.

¨We have a yuuuge problem concerning-”

“The fate of America? The fate of humanity? ” Sonic interrupts in anticipation of a big mission.

Oh, the adventures the American presidents had for him! He could only imagine what new challenge could face him-

“Far worse, I want you to save yesterday’s world if you’re catching my drift,” the orange master replied.

What could he mean by that? Was there something new that needed to be hidden, like an embarrassing media story? Sonic wasn’t someone to sit and fix things like that-it took to long and he would rather do something more practical.

“I’m sorry, what ARE you saying?” Sonic questioned.

“Is this familiar to you at all?” The thick man bends to his side and takes out a grayish green cap with a metallic eagle pin perched on mid center. Below the eagle lay a skull with cross bones with the dulled black letters “SS” on the side inscribed as sharply as lightning bolts. Immediately Sonic recognized the hat.

It looked so familiar to the dusty hat Tails and him found on the beach shore a few years prior. It had been placed in a tool-box in the workshop of the Torpedo-2.

“Seems to be some sort of old electricians hat...” Sonic observes.

“That's not it, you dunce!” Eggman interjects. “It's the official uniform helmet of the schutzstaffel of the the ol’ third Reich, you idiot!”

“I don't know what the hell he's talking about.” Replies el presidente, watching the doors shut behind the doctor, and then looking back to the headwear. “This is a hat that the Nazis wore, ya know, Hitler?”.

“Oh, okay.” Sonic responded with confusion.

He didn't know who or what this Hitler guy was but he sounded important, he could always Google him later.

“So what about him? Isn't he dead or something?” Sonic said as a wild guess. “Yes he is but he's also not. . .” Trump replies sadly. “Ya see. People keep comparing me to the Nazis, and I don't like it, I don't like it” He nods as his turkey neck swings from side to side. He squinted his eyes in thought. “Don't like it. Uhh-uh.”

Sonic rocked his legs back and forth on the seat. “That kinda sucks, but to be honest, egghead and I have some important matters to deal with,” he says with a frown thinking of his anger towards the mad doctor. “I’m kind of occupied saving the present. Ya know? It’s kinda my thing?”

“Whatever you can dish out, I am up for it” Sonic reprises with confidence as he pointed to himself.

“You gotta go back in time to take him down. Take him away from the world before he even makes his rise and before people have something to compare me to- uh I mean before he does something the world will mourn to see” Trump states. “How do you expect me to go back in time?” Sonic questions. “You're gonna run back in time” Trump confidently asserts to Sonic.

“Well, I am fast, but sorry to break it to you, Mr President, but I am not that fast. Ya see, I need a little something to go as fast as we'd like.” Sonic turns his head down a little bit after humbling himself.

“Oh, don’t worry, I have that little something” the orange man reassured. To his left there was a man in black standing vigilantly, his sunglasses giving any onlooker no signs of weakness or emotions to it. Trump looked to him, he looked back plainly as Trump nods his head with a smile; the same smile made when a child is ready to show his friend the coolest thing they have ever seen, bright and impatient.

The man in black taps on the wall that has a pad full of numbers, digit after digit the light to the side goes from green to red. Rrrrrr. The wall safe unlocked, the agent getting his gloves ready. Then, with a careful yet swift motion, the man held to a shining amber emerald. Sonic’s eyes went wide as the guard walked over to Trump, who was also prepping gloves.

“Someone was fishing in the Great Lakes and found this thing. Is that incredible or what?” Trump said, polishing the gem that compared in color to his toupee. “Hey, weren’t you a fan of the guy, Pablo? Show the fast guy the picture we took,” Trump turned to Sonic and then added, “Trust me, you gotta see this guy. Nicest guy I ever met. Great at fishing too.”

The guard, Pablo, showed Sonic a photo on his iPhone. It was a sunny day, and there sat Pablo with thinner clothing, Trump, and Big the Cat. Big the Cat.

Sonic had to retrace his eye movements. B i g the C a t. He managed to find the Chaos Emerald by sheer coincidence? “Oh, you like Big?” Sonic said, a little butthurt. He likes Big the Cat? What?

Pablo nodded. “Best fisher I’ve ever met.” The guard went to check on Eggman, while Sonic looked in disbelief. “So, um, back to the topic, what do you want me to do? Use Chaos Control to go fast?” Trump nodded but still sat in a thinking position. “Well, yes and no. I want you to go fast, but you have to arrive back in time during World War One. Hitler was a very bad man. Killed a lot of people during World War Two.”

“Oh, I get it. You want me to talk some sense into the guy!” Sonic suggested.

“No, I want you to kill him. It’s war. It’s not inhumane when you could possibly be saving the lives of millyuns.”

Sonic sat up on the chair and focused hard. He has never killed anything before. The only thing he has “ended” were the badniks. He couldn’t remember any time in history he planned on killing someone for the solution of the world’s problems.

“I’m sorry Mr. President, but I can’t kill someone. That’s no good! I haven’t killed anything yet, and don’t aim on killing anyone now!”

Trump thought again, then smiled. “No, you have killed something to save the world. Remember the Finalhazard, or the Black Arms?”

Sonic winced at the memory. “Yes. I do. But I wasn’t alone on those tasks.” it was Shadow, his friendly nemesis that put most of the work in killing them. The edge hog could do pretty much any dirty work if it came to saving the world. Why not have him do the job? He could perform Chaos Control better than anyone, too.

“Plus, I’d have to have another chaos emerald to perform chaos control to the point of traveling nearly a century back,” Sonic addressed, still thinking about the reality of killing someone. No president had asked him to do as such before.

“What do you want with me? I have no business with you” Dr Eggman erupts, “I haven't killed anyone, I haven't stolen, I haven't even yelled at a little girl in two weeks”.

“Two weeks geez that's longer than me” one of the agents mutters to the other.

“Not the point. The president wants you here and we are going to wait until we see what he wants with you. Right now he's having word with your friend”.

“Well I wouldn't say friend” Eggman corrects, “more like mor-”

The intercom on the wall glows red, being the only color in the gray interrogation room, “Bring me the red guy, will ya?” Utters the magical voice of the Senior himself.

“Let's go” blankly says an agent. Both of which held Eggman by the back in his hand cuffs and opened the door to the more pleasant looking room of the the helicopter.

Before making a word come out if his mouth, Sonic exhales sharply, “Eggman, look: I need the chaos emerald you've got”

“Sorry to disappoint you, pest” Eggman replies angrily,

“Besides, what could possibly motivate you to go into chaos control? And a better question, what could possibly motivate me, Doctor Ivo Robotnik, to hold an emerald so closely, so securely, that you haven't found it yet? Surely you have the wrong mad, cunning, handsome, and evil scientist. Oh and another thing, what are you going to do about your friends at the verge of drinking radioactive water?” Eggman freely spoke.

“Look Egghead, we can sort that out later, just give me the emerald, I know you're hiding it so might as well make it easy for us” Sonic attempts to persuade with arms crossed.

“How about this, you pest, what if I told you. . .” Eggman pauses as Sonic impatiently yet asks in a drawn out manner, “yes?”

“That there are no emeralds on me and that you are wasting all of our time” The doctor rebuttals with great conviction in his answer. Sonic expels a great groan of frustration as the mustachioed menace did not give him the answer he needed, he would rather have heard that Eggman has hidden it so that Sonic could at least have the slightest clue, but sometimes answers don't come as quick as Sonic.

“Alright I think we're done here” the Grand Papi himself reenters the conversation as the doctor was dragged back to the gray room that he sat in prior to the failed conversation. Despite the fact Trump sat with his head down in thoughts and frustrations concerning his failed dreams Sonic felt an enormous breath of relief within him, the burden of killing has been lifted off of him before he even does the deed.

“I know you only talk like this about TV remotes but where was it last seen?” The president questions the hero in a subtle form of desperation, it was clear to Sonic that nothing in the world will move until Sonic reshapes it,

“It won't matter, Mr President; the emeralds go all over the world after the seven emeralds are all united for a purpose and last time that properly happened was when the Doc wanted to pursue the legacy in the Gaia Manuscripts. So now they have all scattered and we have found all of them except for that last emerald, it could be anywhere, all those other ones we bumped into outta sheer luck.”

“What about Tails, he's smart, let's see if he can help us” Trump states while pretty much ignoring Sonic’s words as he pulls out his watch and taps away at his wrist shortly followed by a bright blue hologram of Tails rising up from Trump's wrist looking Trump in the eye, then turning his head to sonic, “Whoa! What's this about?” then turning back to the the orange, succulently thicc turkey, “What can I do you for you, Mr President?”

“Tails, my bro, I'm phoning you and Sonic over here to help me settle a score on behalf of the whole wide world”

“That sounds kind of. . . “ Tails tries to come up with a good, softer synonym for sinister, “Extreme, what do you mean, revenge? Because I'm here to help people, not hurt them”

“Just hear me out, tails, buddy” Trump says to hold Tails’ attention long enough to inform him about his ingenious political stunt.

#sonic the hedgehog #donald trump #trump #fanfic #fantasy #comedy

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anthonybialy · 4 years

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Results Pending

Welcome to Earth. Someone claiming an event is going to happen doesn’t make it so. I know it's negative to inform new residents that words may not match actions, but street smarts accumulated over decades on this glob don't turn off. Distinguishing between talk and outcomes is maybe the first thing that should be learned. That's especially so about politicians, who have been known to fib to serve their own interests. I'm starting to suspect anyone who wants to be in charge may lack trust.

As for the fake exception proving the rule true, Donald Trump is the least different totally different officeholder. Pretending to not care about what will get him votes is strange for the most singularly obsessed consumer of public opinion imaginable. The very secure student council president brags about his grades at the semester's start. You may as well put him on the Dean's List now. He's going to tell his parents he made it either way.

Pretending Trump gets it done is a sign that you're at risk for buying a timeshare. Does anyone still think blatancy means he can't be speaking untruths? This totally different human would never claim he's the best ever without evidence just like he has quite publicly since Reagan's first term.

Shamelessness is not a blessing. He doesn't go through the effort of crafting a fairytale beforehand, which is used as evidence he must be truthful. Suspicion might be justified regarding claims that would make any politician blush.

Self-confidence can mask many deficiencies. Well, that doesn't apply to incompetence. But convincing others of proficiency is a certain type of skill. Trump issues bluster convincingly, at least to a certain brand of sweet rubes. Announcing just how you prefer to be seduced may be too racy for a Bumble profile. Anyone with the slightest sense of modesty should keep salacious tabs private.

Some presidential observers have noted a lifetime of the incumbent's boasts so massive they seem unrealistic. Any claim that grand must be true. Still, someone should check if what he's announced actually happens just to verify he's incredible.

It's insubordinate to challenge the president, who is to be respected at all times by virtue of holding the highest post. Many supposed conservatives are indignant that anyone would doubt the head of state. Those demanding fealty to someone filling a temp job for a horrid government free people should loathe are the same ones who now think debt is cool. Why check his previous job performance? Atlantic City turned out as wonderfully as the USFL.

The dedication to proclamation is seen in trade wars, which are a little trickier to win than advertised. It's too bad copywriters can't make claims become real. The ad executive-in-chief is going to get great deals by slapping on fees. Retailers pay sales taxes, you economic dunce. Presume desired benefits are already here, which is why I reserved a table at Chili's for Friday knowing Kate Upton will accept my date request in her Instagram comments.

The Taliban is almost as dedicated to pursuing absolute truth. This White House is so fortunate to have found a reliable peace partner who would never, ever lie. That would go against their religion, which is the same reason they forbid terrorism committed in its name. The good news that there have never been attacks planned in a vacuum created by letting Islamic zealots presiding over a godforsaken lot.

At least we're still enjoying a peaceful Iran as much as glorious mandatory insurance. Barack Obama had the same casual relationship with truth as his successor in case you'd like to offend any red hat-wearers. A wholesale difference of style doesn't make the dedication to bullplop any less bipartisan.

Listening to assurances about what people want to believe is the easiest reason to be cynical for good reason. Pretending a prosperous America was respected should have make it easy to never trust a politician post-Obama. But he didn't even leave that inadvertent legacy.

See how things turn out. Maybe the thing someone assures you will be awesome might suck in practice. These salesmen seem more worried about commissions than quality.

Claiming what's next will be amazing when it's actually going to provoke tears is a favorite tactic among politicians in case nobody's noticed. Ooh, those scoundrels will say anything to be popular. Assurances about what joy federal programs will soon bring used to be the exclusive domain of snotty liberals.

People who claim to loathe politicians sure fall for the most preposterous claims. I'm different than those jerks who took your debit card to the strip club, ladies. But learning would mean not getting to look upon the world with wonder every day.

Some fellow Earthlings haven't noticed patterns throughout a life where the subject forced himself into the spotlight. Nobody's going to bother to check on the verge of a second term. It's easier to believe words will work. But not checking them against results means a harder life.

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nationonenews-blog · 7 years

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New Post has been published on Nation One News

New Post has been published on https://goo.gl/5dHxNp

President Trump Educates Democrats, MSM in Amazing Twitter Series

I can only imagine President Trump standing in front of a classroom full of Main Stream Media people and Democrat Political Hacks. The image makes me all giddy inside when I think that they would all be wearing DUNCE Hats.

President Trump just Schooled them both. He sent a series of Tweets this morning gracefully explaining a few things. Apparently, neither the Main Stream Media or Democrats have been able to figure out the President.

It seems he has soft spot for people who are slow to understand simple concepts. He sent out Tweets and the only thing missing were titles for the lessons. We decided to add titles for him.

LESSON 1: FAKE NEWS:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/900706146943717377

“The Fake News is now complaining about my different types of back to back speeches.”

LESSON 2: THE ART OF PUBLIC SPEAKING:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/900708017909506048

“Well, there was Afghanistan (somber), the big Rally (enthusiastic, dynamic and fun) and the American Legion – V.A. (respectful and strong).”

LESSON 3: SOME PEOPLE NEVER LEARN!

In less than 280 characters President Trump just taught nearly an entire semester on public speaking and how to spot fake news. He closed out his lessons with the best one yet, do your job or you get this hat to wear and I will make you sit in the corner! If that doesn’t work you will fail!

“Too bad the Dems have no one who can change tones!”

God Bless President Trump!

Someone has to take pity on these poor little Main Stream Media kiddos and misguided Democrats in Congress. We sure won’t!

Do you Love President Trump? We do, so please SHARE This, it is the only way others will see it.

#democrats in congress #main stream media #msm #trump

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bluesquare12 · 7 years

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Stay woke of these false prophets #Repost @trumpmememe ・・・ What everyone else see when you wear your dunce red hat. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• "What do I know about it? All I know is what's on the internet." - DJT ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• @trumpmememe #RepostLiberally #F45 #NoTrumpNoKKKNoFascistUSA #Grandstander #Showboat #NutJob #Trump #YOULIE #PresidentSnowflake #FTrump #LockHimUp #Resist #Obama #Obamacare #Hillary #ButHerEmails #NotMyPresident #FakePresident #ITMFA #StopVotingRepublican #SoCalledPresident #TrumpFlakes #Cult45 🖕#GoogleIt ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Credit @halhefner #falseprophets

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shiningbeaconofhope-blog · 7 years

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Dunce trump. You get the hat for abandoning the world. #resisttrump #sboh #shiningbeaconofhope #trumpdunce

#sboh #resisttrump #trumpdunce #shiningbeaconofhope

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anthonybialy · 4 years

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Voted Down

They don't check if votes are cast on a candidate's merits, which is Donald Trump's millionth undeserved break. The inspirational leader is against whoever loathes him, which is a kind of principle. Those receiving his crabby ire love sinking to his level.

Some people have personalities so strong that they're defined by who hates them. The incumbent's greatest strength takes the form of contempt from liberals, who are eager to draw attention from how often they agree politically with their archenemy. They all love tariffs if you take off the names. Having unpleasant enemies is sufficient to impress some voters.

Trump getting support because of who loathes him is an overreaction like a high schooler befriending a juvenile delinquent to stick it to caring parents. Rebellion is fun until the family's silverware is pawned to buy glue to huff.

The president's smartest opponents keep helping him. Inadvertent assistance is provided constantly by pompous dunces who not only mistakenly think they’re elite but believe that’s good. Thank you for being better than the rest of us. Will you kindly provide guidance to the rabble from your blessed perch? Setting out to get Trump no matter what confirms his deepest paranoia, which is really just what we all needed.

So little support for Trump occurs because of what he actually does. It might be fitting to someone embodying a hollow persona, but it's still not healthy. Only the head zombies like Trump on his own terms, which are not very good in case anyone hasn't noticed despite what his sons' tweets claim.

Professional Trump foes commit his same mistake, namely overreacting to the point of letting it define oneself. Some people are so alike that they can't stand each other.

Calmly pragmatic liberals have decided the best way to respond to Trump is with Year Zero lunacy. They're making voters choose between a boorish oaf and someone who thinks the wrong side won the Cold War. The alternative to Trump involves sticking it to the oppressive decadent Western bourgeoisie. I miss elections between factions who disagreed about whether the successful should be punished a bit more.

Telling you how to live is a popular hobby amongst politicians. I'd call it a passion. The party doesn't matter even though each member would emphasize it's the only thing that matters. Politicians have to check lapel pins to remember which side they're on.

One side's particularly committed lunacy is the easiest way for voters to distinguish. The alleged party of science is ardent about the ability to switch gender with one's mind. Disregarding genitalia extends to including what pronouns you're permitted to use. Opposing Trump means a man who thinks he's a woman gets to call you sexist for noting the conflict with biology.

Nothing depresses like counting how many times humans have to suffer through socialism to retain the lesson that forced sharing leads to quite a corpse count. Survivors envy the dead, as they're surprised at how efficient governments can be when it comes to confiscating what little goods remain. Stealing dignity in the collective's name is an even worst offense than taking stuff. Socialism teaches us to avoid being materialistic. It's not a crime when the government does it.

Noting one side punches orphans doesn't make the other option appealing. Republicans are so ticked by the way they see a boorish overcompensating oaf being persecuted that they feel compelled to back him. Having slimy enemies doesn’t change the fact he’s a bad entrepreneur, president, and person. He still boasts to compensate for ineptitude even if he's opposed by America's Shining Path.

Supporting someone whose obnoxiousness only begins with personality should feel slimy. A president who truly deserves your vote should understand what a trade deficit is. For all his assurances that he's the last warrior defending against neo-commies, the best businessman ever sure is eager to not touch unconscionable spending or the horrid entitlements which bankrupt the nation like they're his companies.

True conservatism is found in noting every option sucks. Anyone who wants to hold office is arrogant enough to rob you and expect gratitude for the privilege. The reality of everyone with the slightest access to power craving authority over humanity is especially true now when both factions think adding debt is a race.

An ideology should involve believing in something for a reason other than it ticking off people who are fun with whom to disagree. Backing Trump because it enrages Democrats feel like Boomers who liked the Beatles because the simple pop tunes irked parents. Someday, there'll be a presidency decent people can like on its own terms.

A red hat may as well display a middle finger to those who loathe the president responsible for making such tacky apparel into a political statement. A gesture would be easier than reading. Since when does a cap come with a literacy test?

Fighting authority now takes the form of voting to reelect a president. There's nothing punk about endorsing the person who wants to boss you around. True enlightenment comes in hating people for who they are.

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