#also i'm obsessed with the one from 1x05

[stbot]

tanthamore + small touches

(bonus bc kit is totally reaching out for jade’s arm but they cut away 😩)

#tanthamore #jade claymore #kit tanthalos #willow 2022 #willow #an anon requested the armor touch #which i definitely noticed and have absolutely mentioned before bc !!!!! #it's adorable #but then it gave me an idea for a full set so. #i know i didn't include a ton #but i wanted to focus on smaller or underappreciated moments #ones that i haven't seen talked about or giffed much (if at all) #also i'm obsessed with the one from 1x05 #bc jade's hands are very calm like 'ok mr cagehead found us lets maybe get a move on' #and kit's hands are just..... *flail!!!!* 'panicpanicpanic' #~acting~ #i think i need a gif tag

[raayllum]

More Than Anyone or Anything

or why I think Callum is Like That: The Meta.

AKA because I realized that while I've talked about Snake Boi Callum and why I view him that way before, it was mostly in regards to explaining his canon traits that aren't usually very disputed. These being:

His sometimes obsessively dangerous qualities, specifically surrounding magic (1x04, 1x05, 2x04, 4x01, 4x02, 4x04)

His ambitious side (man heard from the one magical 'expert' he knows that humans just flat out cannot do primal magic naturally, said fuck that, and got it in a week after one week of practice)

His temper (1x01, 1x06, 1x09, 2x07, 3x08, 4x01-4x04, 5x01, 5x05, 5x08)

His ruthlessness (turning on Viren the second Ezran is in danger despite trusting him for years beforehand; his attitude towards Claudia in 2x07 after she's likewise betrayed him; smiling when killing corrupted soldiers in 3x09 even when Ezran expresses grief and Janai expresses horror when she was facing a similar scenario during the timeskip; arguing to take the violent route in 5x05 whereas Ezran and Rayla pick the more preventative one).

Therefore, for this meta, I will be focusing specifically on why I interpret Callum as Selectively Loyal to the point of being willing to help free Aaravos in order to spare, specifically, Ezran and Rayla's lives (and not necessarily anyone else's, such as Zym and Soren).

Strap in boys — this is going to be a long one.

Disclaimers: As always, this is just my opinion, and an interpretation being popular in fanon does not automatically mean it's better or more valid / rooted in canon than any other kind of (less popular? maybe common) interpretation. I will also be making it clear when I'm drawing on sections/snippets from supplementary material (TDP short stories, novelizations, and Tales of Xadia) but give that it's supplementary material, feel free to take it with the ultimate grain of salt.

Related Metas (that's worth reading if you're interested in other Snake Boi aspects that are not going to be heavily touched on here):

Callum's temper (S1-S3) and how it links to him typically feeling helpless to fix/aid his loved ones, causing him to lash out even sometimes at them

How Callum operates differently from Ezran and Rayla (S1-S4), but very well embodied I believe by the scene in 5x05 where Ez and Rayla side with the "violence as a last resort" option and Callum does not

How Callum views Zym and the egg in Arc 1 differently from Ez and Rayla, or how Callum sees things as tools and why he gets fixated on / what he projects onto objects (much like Viren with the mirror)

Differing Priorities for Callum and Rayla in TTM, in which Rayla only engages in their scheming because she thinks Viren is a threat to the whole world, and Callum comes up with their scheme because he just wants to give her closure

What does the Trio's Tales of Xadia's bios actually mean? (this one will be touched on the most down below, so feel free to skip unless you want a more detailed refresher)

Specifications:

If you're someone who doesn't see Callum this way, but you're genuinely interested in reading a differing perspective, please read on. If you're someone who doesn't necessarily see Callum this way, but you're curious and/or on the fence, please read on. If you'd like to add your own thoughts to this post, feel free to add on if it's in support; if it's differentiation, please make your own post (I'll engage respectfully with if it I want to).

If you're someone who is only going to get upset with my viewpoint, please curate your internet experience and do not read this post. If you're only going to make thinly veiled meta rebuttals of this post in a rude way ("even though some people may think...", linking to this post, general assholery), please do not read this post. You would be far happier if you were less obsessed with an opinion I've held for 5+ years and months & months before you likely joined the fandom. i just want to chill in my corner, please do not chuck pillows at me for doing what I've always had a good time doing that doesn't hurt anyone.

With all of that out of the way, let's get into it

What do I mean when I say selective loyalty?

Loyalty has always been an interesting trait to me, simply because in the bulk of storytelling, it is a necessary character trait for a story to function. One of the biggest things that a character can do to be disliked is be a traitor towards someone that trusted them, and if a character is too disloyal, they can be hard to engage with due to a lack of consistency. Characters who start out loyal to no one/nothing inevitably have arcs, provided they stick around in the story long enough, of garnering loyalty for someone (usually found family loved ones > a cause) in order for them to be able to progress as a character. We want characters to bond, and we want them to be there for each other, and if they're not at all, we want to see what happened or what other bonds they might form with other people. If not loyal, we want to see why they're working with someone at the very least.

Therefore, everyone in real life or in fiction has some elements of 'selective loyalty,' since we all have people (the people we know and love) we are more loyal to, fundamentally, than others (strangers / people don't know at all). It's just a natural normal thing to adhere more to valuing and looking after the people in your immediate circles over people you don't know at all, even if that doesn't mean we're void of caring about strangers, either. Our empathy or compassion, as well as the social structure of our living units and lives, are more cohesion for caring for strangers than it is for competing with strangers or being wholly indifferent.

For a quick overview of the way selective loyalty can work, I'm actually going to talk about Claudia quickly, and her internal hierarchy. While she is loyal to the princes ("Their Dad is dead and you lied about it. Plus they're our friends. It's wrong") to the point of that possibly being an opportunity for severance, initially, with her father ("Careful, if you tell the truth you will lose her"), Claudia's loyalty to her father ultimately trumps her loyalty to the princes, and even to her family with Soren.

For the opposite approach of selective loyalty, I'm going to talk about Rayla, who regularly bails out strangers (the boys in 1x03, Phyrrah in 2x07) and enemies (Bait as a frenemy in 1x05, Nyx in 3x05) as well as the people she grows to love (the boys on regular intervals). She and Runaan, as is Soren, are all willing to put their perceived missions/duties not only above but in direct opposition to their familial loyalty / family ties.

Callum, TO ME, is not, and here's why.

When I say that Callum is selectively loyal, I mean that there is ultimately nothing he will put above Ezran and/or Rayla at any interval with very few exceptions (aka if they're still breathing, he's still going to be fighting for them). This is for a few reasons.

I'm going to talk more about why it's Ez and Rayla specifically later, but for now I want to talk briefly about how they factor into his decision making and what see of them from people who have lost his loyalty.

Despite knowing and having trusted Viren for the bulk of his life ("Claudia! Lord Viren! Anyone!"), as soon as Callum learns that Viren has put Ezran substantially at risk ("Two [targets]? What do you mean?" "I'm here for the king, and I'm also here for his son, Prince Ezran") Viren is fucking Dead To Him.

It's not just that Viren lied, it's that Viren's lies and choices put Ezran in danger, and that's just not acceptable. We see this happen again with Claudia in S2, even after Callum defending her and trying to give her chances. She lied, yes, but she scares Ezran and attacks Rayla again, and that's the breaking point.

When you threaten the people he loves, when you scare them, if he trusted you, he will never look at you the same way again. Any loyalty he felt towards you will snap and snap hard, permanently, like a wishbone.

Callum loves and cares for other people. He loved and cared for Viren and Claudia. But unlike Ezran, who is willing to give Claudia a chance in 3x09 to the point of running after her, helping hand extended, and unlike Rayla, who still adamantly loves Runaan even after their fight and with no hint of change from him, Callum does not take other people hurting his family lightly, at all.

He loves and cares for Amaya, and Soren, and Harrow. But even Harrow, his father, is someone he's willing to put on the backburner — despite having an offered chance from Rayla to save him — in order to do what Harrow asked and what Callum's first instinct is: to look after his brother, because it is fundamentally unsafe for Ezran to stay at the castle for any longer, and he knows it.

Callum knows what the egg might mean, but he does not follow Rayla out the dungeon door blindly. He runs only after Ezran does, and only after Claudia might hit Ezran with lightning. Then he acts. Then he makes a choice. Because his loyalty to his brother outweighs after other substantial relationship in his life, at this point, but it doesn't necessarily stay that way.

Inner circle

In Tales of Xadia, all the characters are given values. While the values have more generic explanations (i.e. Callum's highest one, Liberty, is labelled as, "Have you ever resisted the control of others? This value is about freedom and autonomy. You’re motivated by a world without oppression or suppression") the characters individual bios help offer more clarity on their specifics. Callum's, specifically, states, "I am beholden to my inner circle, not some silly kingdom." Ouch, from Katolis' crown prince and Ezran's heir apparent.

It is, of course, important to not take this trait entirely literally. If Callum truly valued his own personal autonomy over everything else, he would've taken Finnegrin's deal in 5x08 in a second if all he wanted as his own freedom. Instead, Callum's highest value being Liberty is far more about his place with Freedom as a Theme more than something he wholly actively desires; again, we see in 5x08 he's willing to risk more of his freedom by doing dark magic in order to save Rayla.

There are things that Callum values more than his own personal freedom and there are things that he values more than magic (2x04: "Callum, you're being an idiot! Why would you do that? You can't risk your life to learn magic") vs throwing himself off the top of the Storm Spire at the slimmest chance of, once again, saving Rayla.

That said, this value and quote is still very useful, as it does then, beg the question, of who exactly is Callum's inner circle? Well...

Ezran and Rayla are the most important people in the entire world to him. Full stop. There is nothing he will fundamentally put above them. He only stays behind in 1x06, thereby not sacrificing the egg by proxy, because Rayla points out "We'll need to be up here to pull [Ezran] out." Even when he was stressing about whether they'd gotten to the Sea of the Cast Out on time, the second Rayla showed a hint of major discomfort/potential self-deprecation, he was offering to get back into the goddamn boat to comfort her ("I'm getting out—" "No. I can't do it, but you have to"). He's hesitant to go into town to find a vet for the egg because "We will definitely find some elf hating humans," pouting further when Rayla brushes him off, and flings himself off his balcony when he thinks there's even a chance that Ezran isn't okay into what he knows would subsequently be a trap. He's the first to say that they need to leave Rex Igneous' chambers after protecting Ezran from falling rocks with his own body, and the last to actually leave, almost being crushed by rocks himself because he's so committed to standing there and watching Rayla leave.

He equates Rayla's love for him with his love for Ezran on Day Nine (2x03: "I couldn't tell him. And I understand why you couldn't tell me. When you care about someone, it's hard to hurt them. Even when what you're saying is the truth.")

Hell, he even forgets that Sol Regem is there in 3x01 because he tunnel visions on Rayla needing his help so intensely she has to point out the massive ton dragon actively trying to kill them to him.

He's a nurturer, a fixer, a solution seeking. He wants to make you feel better ("See it's working right? Don't you feel a little better?"), he is a kind reassuring word ("Don't be so hard on yourself, Ez") always, he thinks of your problems even when you don't (Rayla's binding in 1x07), he will lay his life down for you without question ("I am Prince Ezran"), he will get mad at you for treating yourself poorly (3x04, like almost all of S4), he dotes, he notices, he will compromise his beliefs for you ("Could he really bring himself to go through with his plan? What if he didn’t succeed? What if he compromised his beliefs and it was all for nothing? [...] But Rayla was in trouble"—S2 novelization).

You mean everything to him: "Rayla's strong, thin arms wrapped around him meant everything" (S2 novelization of the hug scene in 2x04) / "You're my brother, and you mean everything to me" (2x06).

You are his whole world.

If you're part of his inner circle, and not everybody is, so let's talk about it.

[ Callum, excluding Claudia and Soren from their support system, even though the siblings haven't yet betrayed them, while including Rayla, even though he and she haven't made up yet. ]

What about Soren and Zym?

As stated before, Callum's selective loyalty does not mean he doesn't care about other people in his life, such as Claudia (in the past) and people like Amaya, Soren, and Zym in the present. Merely that, slightly like Claudia, Callum does have an internal hierarchy of care — the way you might have friends vs best friends — of who takes priority, and we see S1, S4, and S5 in particular demonstrate this quite well.

As already stated, Callum prioritizes Ezran over the egg in 1x06 and is held back emotionally by Ezran fuelled logic and physically by Rayla. In 1x07, he doesn't want to risk going into town — even to potentially find help for the egg — because of his last disastrous experience with humans and Rayla. In 2x04, Callum is perfectly happy to walk around a sea to let Rayla avoid her fear of water, and approximately 5 minutes later is getting on Ez and Rayla's case for goofing off (with Rayla's thinly veiled and fallible disguise) because "Sometimes getting someplace slightly faster is important, like right now." Wasn't quite the tune he was singing earlier, now was it? For Zym, we see this again in 3x04 — Rayla is having a breakdown, so she has more of an excuse, but Callum should conceivably be much more clear headed, and he still tunnel visions into leaving Zym alone with Nyx leading to the theft. Likewise in 4x07 when the group thinks Zym might be gone, Ezran is the one who states, "I'm not leaving without him," and Ez and Rayla are both pretty broken up about it; Callum is sad, for sure, but he mostly focuses on taking care of Ezran and placing a hand on his shoulder.

Then you have Amaya, who Callum loves dearly, but isn't particularly torn up over not trusting or lying to (1x04, 5x03) in spite of being close to her, and isn't as vexed even when he thinks that maybe something bad has happened.

Even when Callum thinks it was bad, and potentially very bad ("The way Gren was talking, I thought maybe the world was ending or something!") he doesn't get angry and he doesn't get demanding. This is very different from how he responds to Ezran and Rayla being potentially in danger or just in trouble.

Which on that note also highlights another key importance between how Callum treats Rayla, in particular, versus how he treats Soren. Now, you could argue that Callum in 5x01 has emotionally matured/healed further than he has in 4x01 prior to Rayla's return, and that would be perfectly fine to do. However, it doesn't change the fact that just the hint of Soren keeping a secret — even before Callum thinks, at all, that it's about Ezran — makes him wait on the battlements to coldly and sternly interrogate Soren about it. With Soren, he demands,

C: I know this — the ties are true as the ocean is deep [...] It means I trust her. Unconditionally. Let her go. Now. R: About your key and the bow. I can explain. C: No, I meant what I said. You don't have to explain or justify anything to me.

Even when Rayla engages in actually shady behaviour — omitting the truth if not outright lying, stealing his key, and retrieving a painfully poignant weapon — Callum doesn't get mad, at all. Soren just implied he was potentially keeping a secret from Callum at the council meeting and lowkey got his ass handed to him, with Callum literally shoving him out of his way and needing Corvus' help to coral the angry step-mage.

Furthermore, even when Soren goes missing in 4x06, although concerned, Rayla is by far the most broken up about it. Ezran is optimistic because he's, well, Ezran; Rayla is torn because even though she doesn't know Soren that well, she feels like it was 100% her fault he's gone missing and has possibly gotten hurt; and Callum, well... mostly focuses about how she feels about it, and less so about his actual friend (because if Ezran or Rayla are emotionally hurting, they will take priority to him). He's focused on making sure she feels better.

Again: Callum loves Amaya, and Zym, and Soren. He loves them dearly. He wants to and does protect them. He can and will take care of them. But push come to shove, they're not in his inner circle — he doesn't trust them the same way, and he doesn't focus on them the same way, because when it comes to his inner circle, he loves them

More Than Anyone or Anything

So after seeing Callum like this from S1 onwards, you can imagine I was pretty thrilled upon opening up his bio in Tales of Xadia — which seems to be the most 'canon' of the supplementary materials thus far (scenes and ages are changed in the novelizations; timelines get a little wonky in the prequel graphic novels; some designs from "Callum's Spellbook" ended up being different; the art book is full of beautiful concepts, of course, that never understandably got off the ground) except perhaps for Though the Moon — said the quiet part out loud. Not only does TOX have plenty of lore drops and hints at future arcs that are coming to fruition (Aaravos' connections to Elarion, mentioning the Great Bookery of Lux Aurea and Leola, etc) but they did something very interesting when it came to what values which character had. There's some leeway as this is very much an Arc 1 reading (probably most clearly seen in Soren's bio) but there is still plenty of bleed over into Arc 2.

Now, as I said before, we don't want to take the Values too literally. As talked about previously, a lot of the characters highest values seem to be things their arcs are set up to thematically test rather than being a 1:1 what they value the most. But I feel like you can glean a good deal from them, so let's look at the trio:

EZRAN:

Justice — 10: I expect the best of people and try not to become an agent of cruelty.

Devotion — 8: All creatures—regardless of origin—deserve love and appreciation.

Liberty — 8: I value the liberty of everyone, sometimes even more than my own.

RAYLA:

Devotion — 10: Love and devotion compel and define me.

Justice — 8: At great personal cost I will strive for what’s right.

Liberty — 8: My only allegiance is to my heart and those who know it.

CALLUM:

Liberty — 10: I’m beholden to my inner circle, not some silly kingdom.

Devotion — 8: I value those close to me more than anyone or anything.

Mastery — 8: I aspire to know the great wonders of every primal magic.

Out of all the more 'heroic' characters listed in the handbook (Amaya, Janai, Aanya) only Callum and Lujanne do not have Justice, "Have you ever been compelled to fix what’s wrong? This value is about balance, virtue, and reward. You’re motivated by adherence to fairness and what you think is right" among their top 3. Each have it at a 6, instead, which the guide labels as, "This matters, but so do many things" and is the second lowest ranking a value can have. None of the main cast have any value at the highest ranking, 12, either, to help indicate scale perhaps.

Devotion, then, is the one we're currently the most interested in for Callum, since as said before, while the general value descriptions are useful, the specific ones help show more indication. Devotion is referred to in Tales of Xadia as, "Have you ever been obligated to others? This value is about duty, faith, and friendship. You’re motivated by the bonds of loyalty and your love for others."

Although devotion is Rayla's highest value, her devotion value makes no indication of who/what she is Devoted to. Whereas Ezran's reflects his deep love and appreciation towards animals (hence saving the baby glow toads in S5) and Callum's we'll get to in a moment, Rayla's we're not privy to. Instead, we can look at her Liberty value, as it states that her allegiance is to her heart ("My heart for Xadia") and to her loved ones (her friends, her family). Much of her arc is therefore feeling torn between what she thinks/feels her duty is versus what her heart is telling her, indicated by her letting Marcos go in 1x01 and the subsequent fallout.

We can also see her state this more clearly in Through the Moon, in which Callum is the one primarily concerned with her parents ("he’s stuck worrying about her parents. About what happened to Runaan. She can’t move on, not without knowing the truth of what happened [...] I hope you find your parents. And Runaan"), versus Rayla going along with the plan, "Callum, listen. Soren was worried about Viren too. Worried that we never found a body. We need to know what happened to Viren. He’s a threat to the whole world! This might be the only way to be sure he’s actually gone! [Upon entering the Portal...] Okay. Viren. My parents. Runaan" and then 5x01 spells it out even more directly.

R: Callum and Ezran need me. A great evil is trying to return to Xadia and we have to stop it, at any cost. I think this is what you would want me to do. I love you, and I haven't forgotten about you. I never will. [...] It hurts me to know they're trapped like this. It's agonizing. But our mission comes first. The world is in danger, and you can trust me to stay focused.

Now this makes sense, as Rayla having this push and pull has not only been a defining feature of her arc most seasons, but is ultimately what's going to be the most challenged when the Callum possession plotline rears its head. Does she kill/incapacitate the man she loves in order to protect the world, or does she fight to get him back no matter what, even if that may lead to ruin and chaos? (I'm hoping for the second one, but I will eat either up, lemme tell you.) Does she finally refuse to sacrifice, or does she barrel on hoping she'll only have to sacrifice herself?

The reason I bring Rayla up at all is because I think it provides a good contrast to how Callum operates, specifically in 5x04, in which case he reaffirms his devotion ("I would do anything for you") and then risks everyone's lives by staying late at the Great Bookery, even when Rayla says three times that well, this isn't the time: "Not yet, Callum... Believe me, I want to do something, but... Callum, we need to leave!"

Rayla cares about everyone, and is willing to risk her life for enemies and for strangers. She will abandon her mission for the world in favour of looking after individuals because they need help, regardless of what it asks of her: "Live or die, this dragon goes home." (And because she believes Ezran and Callum can accomplish the mission without her, but that's a post for another day.) As Bloodmoon Huntress makes explicit, as Ethari says:

Who I love, where I love, what I love, are all specific. But to Runaan and those like your parents... love is rooted in all families, all creatures. Souls like that feel called to protect everyone as fiercely as those they hold close. Each time Runaan leaves, it is with the weight of knowing that he may not come back. That to fulfil his duty, he may need to sacrifice everything, himself, and all that we have here.

Rayla likewise feels called to protect everyone, and that's precisely why by the end of Bloodmoon Huntress she's chosen to literally and figuratively follow in Runaan's career path, in order to be able to help protect and save people like Suroh (a stranger she immediately becomes entangled with). As Rayla says to the vision of Runaan and her parents in 5x01, "I think this is what you would want me to do," because they are ultimately all more alike (even in the occupations Rayla holds, such as assassin or dragonguard) than they are dissimilar.

The reason I highlight Rayla here is because 1) it is her highest value, being the only character to have it as said highest value (Claudia's, likewise, is only an 8 — but everything she does is indeed for her father, and unknowingly herself) and 2) I think it provides a clear contrast to Callum.

Because Callum's devotion does outline who, or what, he's loyal to. He isn't loyal just to causes and he isn't loyal just to concepts. While he cares about the world, when his back is up against the wall and it's a choice between that kind of security vs the life of a loved on (Ez, Rayla), Callum will always choose the latter. He cares about the world — to a Point.

I've talked about it before, but merely a statement of "I value those close to me more than anything" would accordingly be a lot more vague. There could be discussions and debates on what the 'anything' constitutes (morals, responsibilities, hurt feelings) with a lot more grey room as to whether it would include people (strangers).

“Maybe there is something I can do,” Callum said. “Ezran, you stay here. Protect Bait and Zym. Don’t worry. I’ll be back soon—with Rayla.” [...] Could he really bring himself to go through with his plan? What if he didn’t succeed? What if he compromised his beliefs and it all ended up being for nothing? […] But Rayla’s blade bounced off with a clang, sparks flying. She reeled back and tried again. Nothing happened. She was in trouble. Callum inched toward Claudia’s [book].

—Book 2: Sky novelization

But the inclusion of "more than anyone" changes that. It does include people. There is no wiggle room about that.

Now, I'm not going to base my whole thing on one (1) statement from a supplementary material. As previously stated, I've seen Callum with that exact same sentiment for years now, well before Tales of Xadia (March 2022) was released, and well before S4 or S5 premiered. I've gone over a lot of the reasons I thought Callum had selective loyalty even in S1, but I haven't touched too much on one of the biggest reasons why I think that selective loyalty includes a devotional component that borders on dangerous (at least, in a story). And that's, well...

“Rayla told me you used Dark Magic,” [Ethari] said, more stiff and cold. Callum shrank a bit, but his eyes hardened. “I couldn’t just let her die.” “You’d do it again." The prince scowled. “I’m not like Aaravos. He twisted the primal to be like Dark Magic. I would never do that.” “Unless you felt like you had to,” [Ethari] reiterated. “To save Rayla.” “Wouldn’t you do anything to save the person you love?”

—chapter 13 of a fic I co-wrote called in search of silver linings (we discovered gold) from july 2019, respectively

As soon as Callum opened up the door with dark magic in 2x07, I knew it was something he likely would never be able to entirely close. Not for lack of trying or wanting — but that his willingness to engage in dark magic at all spoke to a few different things. The first was the effectiveness — what spell to use, what would be most useful, and what Rayla's biggest problem would be (her swords unable to cut chains) — but most of all was what pushed him there: his devotion.

While magic has always been the thing presenting Callum with paths (to be a mage or not a mage, to be a primal or a dark mage), his bonds with other people, and his love for them — Rayla in particular — has always been what's actually pushed him down certain paths. His love for his mother, and her love for him, is what helps him unlock the sky arcanum. Callum unlocks his wings out of his love for Rayla; he goes down on the path of mage because "you called me a mage, and that felt right."

Although mastery of magic is one of Callum's highest values (an 8, just like his devotion), it was always clear to me that magic is not something Callum values above the people he loves. He can be obsessive, and his love for magic can sometimes put himself and other people unintentionally at risk, but thus far we've always seen him course correct the minute he realizes what's happening. The second things begin to go south at the Banther Lodge, Callum reflects, "We never should've come here," and completely forgoes the quest for the cube. He tries to risk his life just for magic in 2x04, but as we've gone over, he's unable to go through with it, but he will risk his life for his loved ones.

His rejection of dark magic was, to me, of being a dark mage, of not also pursuing primal magic, of relying on dark magic. Not that he would never, under any circumstance, ever do dark magic again if the show put him in the right circumstances. And then he did, in spite of knowing it would make him more vulnerable to Aaravos, in spite of not having any confirmation it wouldn't bring on a second possession, in spite of the fact he was fine being tortured if that meant not doing it or participating.

Then we have Callum giving up the spell, and the fact that the Ocean arcanum is linked more directly to love within his arc — "To love is to simply know this: the tides are true as the ocean is deep" (5x01, 5x08) — in addition to being aware that there are unknown depths in what he's willing to do for said loved ones/Rayla.

This is not to say that none of the main cast would do dark magic — although I don't think Soren or Ezran ever would, and I think Rayla would but only perhaps using herself as spell parts — but that, as the primary mage character, it's going to and is playing a much bigger part in Callum's arc than the others, who are given other thematic considerations.

He hates dark magic. He doesn't want to let Aaravos control him. He refuses to help Finnegrin. He folds on all of those things motivated by love. It's a weakness and a strength; something that, in my eyes, will likely lead to his fall to Aaravos ("Seems to me love's got a tighter grip on you than those chains around your wrists, so I'll do you a favour [by killing Rayla] and set you free") as well as what might save him. But to focus on the fall, with everything already said behind us:

Why Love Instead of Curiosity?

Now, obviously the theory of "Callum will free Aaravos because of [insert non possession reason here]" could be wrong. There's merits in having arcs about the tragedy inherent in losing your agency, it would still open up an interesting arc after the fact, and all that good stuff.

Callum has also very much always been an Icarus figure. He can be obsessive with magic, he can take it too far, and he does have a deep curiosity and thirst for knowledge that has already gotten him in trouble by not excluding dark magic from the bunch.

And deep curiosity is already hinted to be what partially causes him to fall further into Aaravos' clutches in a few different places. The mirror ("What secrets are you hiding?") and the cube ("Perhaps it will be you, Callum, who discover's the cube's secrets") seem accordingly linked and fittingly so, for the Mystery of Aaravos, as is magic: "it's the secret of the primal".

Zubeia also warns regarding curiosity, citing that, "Aaravos was able to give them something they wanted very badly. Aaravos chose as his instruments people who had strong minds and strong hearts… but who had an insatiable thirst and fascination with magic. Aaravos could offer them access to the great mysteries of the universe. Mages were his prey," which implies that this thirst for magic is what got them (primarily) into trouble. This is reflected (pun intended) in both Aaravos' reading of Viren as "You are too curious, hungry for knowledge and power," and while Callum is hungry for knowledge (and not necessarily power), his short story in which he finds the mirror highlights one of these things as well:

Callum’s eyes prickled with dust and tears. He rushed back to the spiral staircase—but as he reached for the figurine that would activate them, he noticed one last door he hadn’t checked. The small chamber beyond it lay dark and silent. A gleam caught his eye. Callum blinked at his own reflection. Curious, he stepped through the door—and there it was. A mirror.

With all that in mind, and I'm sure there's ones I've missed, too, why on Earth am I arguing that while curiosity may play a factor, I think it's going to be love that ultimately causes his initial downfall / playing into Aaravos' hands?

Well...

For starters, I personally find "doing terrible things for love" to be not only a primary theme of arc 2, but much more fundamentally sympathetic than just getting in over your head because you were a dumbass who couldn't read the signs. I know for myself that if Callum fucks around and accidentally gets himself into a place where (under possession at that point or not) he helps free, or just flat out helps, Aaravos knowing everything that he knows, if he does it for love I will defend his choice every step of the way. If it happens just because he wants more power or magical knowledge (hello Viren 2.0 beat for beat) I'm gonna be a lot more critical of him. After all, Claudia has done a lot of awful things but I still have sympathy for her because they were for her family, in their own fractured way, and operating out of a place of deep emotional pain. If she was doing that just because she wanted to be Powerful and Knowledgable, then no, I'm not going to be that sympathetic.

The other half of it, which you might have already guessed, is that curiosity is not a Motivation. It's a manifestation of a character's pyschological makeup. Even for a character like Viren, who very much chased power, ultimately, for the sake of power, we take time to dive into WHY he wanted those things ("To know that I mean something to you, it means everything to me" / "I dream of a bright future for humanity") and his internal justifications, no matter if some of those turned out to be lies.

Characters who are curious are curious because they want to solve puzzles and have a hard time letting things go; or else they are curious because they want to prove themselves by solving things first; or else they are curious because they deeply love and want to understand and protect the world; or else they are curious because they want to know and have access to tools so that they can fix problems; or else... Well, you get the idea.

Even if it is primarily Callum's curiosity and love/thirst for magic that gets him into trouble (and thus far it largely hasn't been, as we see in S2 with his motivation for doing dark magic — yes, there was a part of him that was undeniably curious about what it would be like, but I don't think he would've pushed himself into doing it without the dire straits of "I had to, to save my friends")... That doesn't answer why he's curious.

Either he will pull a full Greek tragedy and be so scared of freeing Aaravos he accidentally walks into it by trying to prevent it directly (and one of the main reasons he's scared of Aaravos is because he's scared he might hurt people he loves through possession) or he needs another motivation, but it can't just be "Callum really wants this [insert magical knowledge here] and it ends badly," because that offers a plot summary, not an emotional character beat. There's no motivation. They'll have to explain why he wants the magical knowledge, why he's chasing it, why this level of curiosity is something he cannot or will not put down even with all the risk factors at play. It has to be grounded in some kind of sympathetic emotion, and love or fear or a desire to be helpful/useful, or all three makes the most sense to me and with all the prior setup.

Conclusion

As a closing note, as well as thank you for reading this far if you have because this got wildly long and out of hand, I want to reiterate that in many ways, to me, Callum's devotion to his loved ones — that he says "I would do anything for you" and mean it — is indeed his saving grace and biggest difference from Viren, who would rather offer up himself or others or have Harrow die than relinquish the egg, because he would never put a weapon into Xadia's hands. Being devotional — valuing the individual — is not always a good or bad thing, nor is prioritizing the 'greater good' always a good or a bad thing. TDP is deeply interested in exploring all the different circumstances of motivation, sacrifice, and choices.

Nor is selective loyalty a bad thing. I'm not wired that way, but some of my closest loved ones are (and of those in the fandom have, overall, greatly aligned with this perceived aspect of Callum). Merely, this meta is meant to examine the claim in Tales of Xadia that "I value those close to me more than anyone or anything," why I was surprised but delighted to see my view of Callum be so directly spelled out, why I had that view and continue to have it, in addition to aspects/pieces of the text that I think support it.

I believe that Callum is loyal to Ezran and Rayla on a fundamental level he does not really extend to anyone else (including many other people who are also his family) and while this is in many ways something that creates the best sides of him — his nurturing, compassionate, thoughtful and protective traits — it is also something that can be exploitable and dangerous, particularly in a narrative where he is set up to be controlled/coerced by the big bad.

And this meta hopefully explained why.

You can take it or leave it.

—Dragons out

#snake boi callum #two pillars #tdp #tdp meta #the dragon prince #analysis series #analysis #tdp callum #callum #multi #tales of xadia #this got so long YES im mad about it #characterization

[pepimeinrad]

OFMD Soundtrack Concert

I spent a huge part of my last week looking at the OFMD soundtrack in detail and love the music used in both seasons (OST, post 1920s-songs (Miles From Nowhere is my absolute favourite) and "classical" pieces (mainly for orchestra and/or piano)). It's been a bit of an obsession actually, and I can't stop imagining a big concert of all of my favourite "classical" (and baroque etc, I know) pieces... if only I had an orchestra and venue at my disposal... the 22 tracks (20 really) add up to about 100 minutes. The list of things I'd have them play under the cut:

A Pirate's Life (Mark Mothersbaugh) Yeah, alright, I won't have Joel Fry there to sing it and it isn't a classical piece. But I would want the concert to start like the show, with this. A bit of a gimmick, someone with a guitar just doing this small bit to get everyone in a pirate mood. The last thing all the way down will also be from the OST, more on that when I get to it.

2. Concerto for Recorder and Viola da Gamba in A Minor, TWV 52:A1: I. Grave (Georg Philip Telemann) This is the one piece that always gets me nostalgic for season 1. This is early Stede and his early crew, I always have his voice in my head while listening to this. One of THE OFMD pieces for me, also because it's reused in episodes 1x07 and 2x05.

3. Symphony No. 34 in C, K.338 - 2. Andante di molto (Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart) This one is used once in 1x02 and twice in 1x03 - I was debating if I should include it since it's so long and only a small part of it is actually heard in the show. I've added it because I really like it and do find it iconic in those scenes - Stede finding his brand! (and because I feel it fits with the flow of the concert)

4. Sonata No. 2 in A major Op. 2 No. 2, - III. Scherzo - Allegretto (Ludwig van Beethoven) On to episode 1x04 where we get to hear quite a bit of this one over Stede and Mary having to get married. Another very nice piece that always transports me straight into that episode. Overall the soundtrack mixes orchestra- and piano-pieces quite colourfully, which would be reflected in my concert too (would need a very able pianist for it!).

5. Sonata in E Major, Kk. 380 (Domenico Scarlatti) They've gotten rid of the Spanish! I love the whole lighthouse sequence a lot (Wee John makes me laugh every last time) and the crew's joy is transported very well in this piece. Another one where the quotient "bit played on the show/length of the piece" is not that big, but another one that I just really like and find fitting to include.

6. Concerto in A Major, BWV 1055: III. Allegro ma non tanto (Johann Sebastian Bach) Welcome on the fancy ship of not so fancy people... episode 1x05 is one of my very favourites and that whole environment of the french ship is very well represented in this piece I think. There are loads more pieces in the episode that I haven't been able to identify, but I think this one here is the most striking anyway.

7. Gnossienne No. 5 (Erik Satie) Yes, I'm putting this here. There are more than half a dozen other points in the show where this lovely tune is heard, but I want to place it at the 'you wear fine things well' part. To calm down after the fast paced party from before. To make everyone think of that moon that's way too big. And this is the spot where the piano-version of this is heard for the first time anyway.

8. Concerto for 2 Cellos in G Minor, RV 531: I. Allegro (Antonio Vivaldi) Bit of a jump from 1x05 to 1x09, but the episodes inbetween had little material for a concert like this (where there'd be no one to sing Mozart's "Voi, che sapete", that's also why Verdi's "Dies Irae" isn't there either). I love the crew and their various excuses - and find this to be a fun piece that needs to be there. One thing that I've read several times that irks me: I'm still searching for the piece that's playing in 1x03 where Stede almost dies and Blackbeard attacks the Spanish. People say it's this one here, but I've listened to it so often and am SO sure that that's not it. Don't know what is, though.

9. Arabesque, No. 1 in E Major (Claude Debussy) Mary living her best life! I love that we got to see that and love her and her fellow widows a lot. I'm not quite happy with having two Debussy's back to back, but like this piece and like thinking of Mary too much to leave it out.

10. Rêverie, L. 68 - Rêverie (Claude Debussy) I'm a sucker for 'oh shit, I love them!'-flashback-montages and the one set to this piece is a beauty! Another bit that I've watched so often that I see it all in my mind while listening to this. The part where the show jumps to Ed and his flashback to 'you wear fine things well' (like 2:04) always kills me.

11. The Four Seasons - Summer in G Minor, RV. 315: I. Allegro non molto – Allegro (Antonio Vivaldi) We say goodbye to season 1 with another Vivaldi, one that took ages for me to recognize in the show. I knew it was supposed to be there while Stede starts his Fuckery and Kraken!Ed abandons the crew, but for a very long time was sure that that wasn't really it (and a bit of doubt remains). Well, the slow parts are definitely in the show, just to my ear the fast parts sound different. Anyway, it also shows up in 2x06 and needs to be in my concert.

After this we'd have the intermission - and part two will be in a reblog because I've run out of links in this post.

#Youtube #ollie's log #our flag means death #ofmd #ofmd soundtrack #ofmd music

[where-theres-smoak-2]

Did you catch the darklina theme playing when The darkling remembers his first kiss with Alina then Alina kills him? If you haven't it's this motif that plays which has some very somber slow violin that sounds tragically romantic. In Fact as weird as this sounds the violins almost sound inverted,if that even makes any sense. I first heard it at the fountain scene in season 1 specifically when Aleks said "you and I are going to change the world Alina" and you can hear it in the background. Then you can hear it more erupt when they start kissing on the desk in ep 5. Before the 2nd season aired I listened to the OST and I was obsessed with the track titled 'Let me be your Monster'. At around 1:53 you can hear the same theme being played and I immediately told myself that it was a scene of them probably kissing because it's literally their theme but then it abruptly pauses with one violin string being played for almost 20secs. It then builds up and carries on the theme then with an added trombone or something in the background then it's gets lower and lower until it ends with a sad violin ravka theme being played. I then thought it was probably the darkling dying. I came to a realisation that it could be Alina pulling a Jon snow on him. Imagine my surprise when it turns out I was right both times 😭 Anyway you probably already knew about the music but I wanted to share some thoughts on it and my personal experience trying to guess what was happening in this scene 😂 I'm kind of new to the grishaverse and I finished season one 3 weeks before the new season dropped so I was kind of obsessing. I wanted to know what you think of their theme? It gives me a James bond feel and I love it. Sounds almost like a 'What could have been' theme. It also feels very Romeo and Juliet-esque if that makes sense.

(P.S.) I also realised there is a motif that's played when Alina uses the shadow cut in the finale of S2 that is the same as when the darkling uses the shadow cut for the first time in S1 ep2 in the show. The track is called 'Rise and fall" on the S2 OST and it starts around 2:20 and it ends around 3:10(just some more parallels I've noticed with the darkling and Alina from season 1 to season 2).

Ok I love everything you said here. I also love the darklina theme so much, after season aired I played it pretty much non stop. Fun fact the original theme that was played in season 1 is titled 'Hope For The Future'. I also thought this was a very fitting title as this was very much what Alina represented to Aleks, but also it was what Alina saw in Aleks, she too at a time believed that they could bring hope to ravka together. Another fun fact is that there are actually two versions of this theme, on that was officially released and another unreleased version. The officially released one is the one that plays during the fountain scene and their first kiss and the unreleased on plays when they kiss on the desk in 1x05.

The officially released one, Hope For The Future, is much softer than the unreleased one. What I love about the Hope For The Future theme is that it starts out almost tentative, its slow and there are pauses. But then as the piece goes on the pace picks up and the chords are stronger and the music begins to swell so that it sounds uplifting. What I love about it is it mirrors Alina's character arc, when she first meets Aleks and comes to the LP she is very unsure of herself and her powers and still very much sees herself as the stick from Keramzin, but then he shows her who she truly is, shows her that she is grisha and powerful. So by the time you get to the point where they are sharing their first kiss in 1x05 she is a much more confident person who has more faith in herself and the music matches that.

It's a similar idea with Aleks, at first I think he was very tentative about his feelings for her, he has lost many a lover and so I don't think he wanted to open his heart up to more heartbreak despite feeling the connection between. Before Alina I think he was a very isolated and lonely man. But again by that first kiss he is letting her in more and is once again letting hope into his heart and believing for the first time in hundreds of years that he may find peace and that they may be able to save the grisha.

When it comes to the unreleased version that plays during their desk kiss it is a bit different. Whilst it carries the same tune or melody it sounds to me alot more passionate if that makes sense. The music swells much quicker and to me there also almost seems to be an ache or desperation behind those swells. There is a brief moment in the middle of the song where it slows and quietens, its the moment when Aleks asks if she is sure, then the music swells again as they kiss once more. For me this piece followed their passion in the scene and it also really captures that longing and ache they feel for each other. But also there is something euphoric about the piece.

When it comes to 'Let Me Be You Monster' what is interesting is the part that is the darklina theme, I am pretty sure is actually the unreleased version and not the Hope For The Future one from their first kiss. So they've taken footage of their first kiss but played the theme from their desk kiss over it.

Like you I listened to the soundtrack before season 2's release and become obsessed with this particular piece. I also upon realising it was the darklina theme thought it might be a kiss scene, I predicted that it would be the chapel scene form book 2 as the beginning part of the song sounds very menacing and dangerous and then it shifts into the darklina theme. So I thought the beginning part was going to be Alina and co running from the nichevo'ya and then the darklina theme the moment when she kisses him and uses his powers against him. But then I heard the part at the very end where it sounds very similar to the noise they use for the fold, like this pained cry, it played in the background during the fountain scene in 1x04 when Alina was telling the story about the black heretic and the creation of the fold. To me though the way these notes were drifting off in the song made me think of a dying cry. That's when I started wondering if it was actually Aleks' death scene. We know now that the menacing start to the song was the nichevo'ya attacking Alina and her realising, from the way Aleks lunged out as if to catch it and pull it back, that he didn't have control over them.

Something else that is interesting is that on the season 2 soundtrack there is another track called Hope For The Future, it plays over Aleks' funeral and you can here that first kiss theme in it but it is much slower, like they've dragged each note out which really made me think about how long a life Aleks had, like each stretched out note is symbolic of the hundreds of long lifetimes Aleks has endured. The track is also very sombre and sad, there are no uplifting swells really and it is much more muted, it very much sounded like a lament.

Good catch on the motif playing when Alina uses the shadow cut being the same as when the darkling does, I did not catch that myself.

#darklina #s&b season 2 spoilers #answered

[sixstepsaway]

insert that "I LIIIVE" gif of the rat thing emerging from flames here because i am awake and i have thoughts

(eta: guys im sorry i've never seen mulan i didnt know that gif was of mushu or from mulan IM SORRY I DIDNT KNOW HE WAS A [asks google] DRAGON AND I COULDNT FIND THE GIF TO ACTUALLY INSERT IT I DIDNT KNOOOOOOW IM SORRY)

so i was thinking about how we were all discussing yesterday how Ed seems to, like, get new fixations that give him a brief bit of joy until they tip him too far into instability and being unreliable and Izzy has to deal with them?

and I was thinking about the fact the majority of us seem to read Ed as having ADHD, and he definitely seems to be depressed, and I was thinking about my own experiences with ADHD and I just... I think if 1x09 hadn't gone down the way it did, Stede and Ed wouldn't have lasted anyway, right now?

and, i quickly clarify, i'm not saying in this that Ed doesn't love Stede or vice versa, and I'm not saying I don't want to see them together in the end (I do), I'm just saying I don't think they were (or are) at a place where that would actually happen, and for once I'm talking about something different than the rose-tinted glasses

the thing about how Ed is presented is that he's bored. He's had enough of a boring life where everything is the same every day.

The way he describes piracy in the past, when he's reminiscing with Jack or telling Stede about the life he doesn't want to go back to, it sounds like it used to be fulfilling for him. He used to enjoy it! He loves a good maim, he cut off toes 'for a laugh' (implying it was fun), he and Jack talk excitedly and animatedly about serving under Hornigold, despite it being terrible.

The way my ADHD has presented over the years is this: I have a hyperfixation. It's usually a TV show or video game, but I'm into it. I'm obsessed. I can't think of anything else, and anyone who tries to talk to me about anything else finds themselves very disappointed because all I want to think about or do is related to that thing I'm fixated on. After a few days of this, it simmers down to something more manageable (where I am right now with OFMD), and although I'm capable of talking about other things at length, and I'm happy to do other things, I'm still getting a shit ton of serotonin and dopamine from the thing, either by rewatching, replaying, writing fic, reading fic, watching fanvideos, or whatever else.

And then, after anything from a week or two to up to around a year or so, depending on how much Newness I'm able to keep injecting into that fixation (a 5-episode Netflix series no one else watches will last a couple of weeks, an ongoing show that me and my bestie are both into might last a year+), that fixation fades away and I'm left with... nothing, because I can't even look at the thing now. I've wrung it dry. It has no serotonin or dopamine left to give.

That is when my depression cuts in. I don't see myself as depressed because those feelings only come up when I'm either suffering from PMDD or my fixations are gone and I have nothing to obsess over.

I see a lot of that in Edward. The cycle of needing something to give him newness and excitement and dopamine, the sudden high when you find the thing that makes your brain go brr (Stede and the Revenge, Jack showing up) and the horrible crash once it loses its shine (his depression in 1x03 and 1x04 that is barely noticeable in 1x05-1x09).

I'm not saying Edward doesn't also have depression, to be clear, I'm sure he does, but I am saying that ADHD hyperfixations are an excellent (sarcasm? potentially) way of masking depression to the point you all but forget you have it until suddenly you're crashing again and the world doesn't seem worth existing in because nothing is giving you joy the way your fixation does.

Ed has no joy and no fun in 1x03, it's why he latches on to the idea of Stede, who seems so fascinating. In 1x04 he lunges wildly from rescuing Stede to discussing suicide to playing dress-up to mourning the idea of dying to being a lighthouse and committing the next chunk of his life to hanging out with Stede. ADHD-ers also hyperfixate on people, and if we let it be that way and not supplement it with other things and interests and treat that person as a full person, not just a fixation, and distance ourselves from that hyperfixation, it can be really toxic for everyone involved.

The way Ed talks about Stede in 1x09 ascribes the full responsibility for his no longer being depressed and being happy and having fun to Stede, rather than the fact he was surrounded by people who treated him like an equal and loved him, and the fact he was doing something new and different. He says 'you' as the reason the last few weeks have been so good, and as wonderful and romantic as that is (and, again, it is), when you read that through the lens of ADHD and depression you can just... see the crash coming?

You can also see it in 1x10. I stand by my meta that Ed is masking as Stede when he takes Stede's place as Captain, draped in fine things, eating marmalade and talking about feelings with the crew, but if you look at that from an ADHD-er with their hyperfixation ripped away context, it's very similar to how it feels to me to be fixated on, say, an online video game, to the point of playing it 12hrs a day, and then the internet gets so slow you can't, and so you're scrabbling for crumbs like reading about other people's games and looking up discussions of how to play better. You can't get the full 'hit' of the fixation, and you're desperately trying to still get something from it, because you've been getting all of your dopamine and serotonin from it up till now and suddenly some outside factor has ripped it from your grip. Ed draping himself in Stede's things and eating his marmalade and living in his ship and trying to be him reminds me of that.

The nice thing about all of this, is that when they're reunited the fixation will, hopefully, have faded down to something more manageable, and that means they can come together on a more even-keel, with Ed seeing Stede less as a dopamine dispenser and more as a person that makes him happy in a more well-rounded way. More than that, hopefully Ed can find fulfillment and what he needs before he reunites with Stede, so Stede can just be a brick in the wall of his mental health, rather than the entire structure. He was making good strides towards that when he was being pseudo-Stede, because he was filling his life with people and hobbies outside of Stede himself, and that was good!

Until the kraken thing, of course, but I'm sure we can get back there eventually!

anyway this brought to you by the person who decided to watch OFMD with her mother who has <1hr free every day and so had to eke it out over about two weeks while trying very hard not to sob in between episodes because of how much i wanted to binge the whole thing in one good and how awful i felt to be kept away from it by a hell of my own making

(my mom loves OFMD too. i watched 1x01 alone, then half of 1x02, then decided it was so good i wanted to share it with her, and she actually enjoyed 1x01 more than i did, she was in absolute hysterics over stede's antics, whereas i just found them very amusing. it made the show even better to watch, so i have no regrets, but boy was that fortnight hard for my brain)

#edward teach #edward teach meta #ofmd #ofmd meta #stede bonnet #blackbonnet #blackbonnet meta #our flag means death

[measuringbliss]

Glee Rewatch 1x05, okay, maybe Will sucks (and everybody's obsessed with balls)

This episode is about balls.

(Are you confused? Here's an explanation!)

First, can I just say that Chris Colfer is a great actor? His role is very short but the scene where he's hangover and barfs on Emma... He's great. What's more, he's wearing a... well, a straight suit. You know. Doesn't suit him. And unsurprisingly, he wears it when he has a hangover aka when he's not himself.

Don't Stop Believin', *again*? I guess they mostly needed the song for its 10 seconds scene so why do something new if it wasn't the focus?

As usual Terri and Will are defined by their clothes, here it's about the color contrast.

Now can we talk about this dude and his badges? He has *a lot* of badges. Does anyone even wear that many? Chris, what's going on here? And why does it still work? I like it! I don't understand it, but I like it! The tie is hideous but it fits with everything else. This is such a strange one-off thing. (Note from a month later: I'm still utterly fascinated by this outfit, it needs its own post!)

Always covered in layers. Layers are comfy. Dude needs to be comforted. And naturally, Rachel's top is full of pink hearts. Definitely different from Slaychel who replaces her in S5.

And when Rachel's not wearing hearts, she wears stars. Of course she does.

I don't like April Rhodes. And I understand that Will recruiting her is a way to satire irresponsible teachers, but I really don't like April, except maybe vaguely in her later appearances. With that said, she fits in the early themes of the show (the lost opportunities of your youth).

People about Child Star (S6): "so now a child is part of the Glee Club? He doesn't even study at McKinley!" They conveniently forget that April was a full-on adult and temporarily participated as well. She was registered as a student, though...

This shot is here to tell you this specific, inconsequential guy has a lot of balls, instead of just two. I'm sure this is plot-relevant. Admit it, y'all live for my deep analysis.

Similarly, the bowling balls in the background as well as the ball-shaped pizza and paper cups clearly indicate Rachel and Finn are preoccupied with sex. Rachel hesitating to put her fingers in the bowling ball earlier is indicative of her hesitation concerning sex (I think she hasn't done anything yet at this point, right?) and Finn's encouragement is his subconscious manifesting itself. They're horny for each other.

For their last performance of the episode, the New Directions are dressed in blue, which has been the color scheme of Vocal Adrenaline until now. Does this mean they reached VA's level? Or maybe it is that Rachel's back, and blue is also the color of her relationship with Finn.

#glee #glee rewatch

[vole-mon-amour]

IWTV, 1x05, part 1.

He-fucking-llo and ex-fucking-CUSE ME??? ARMAND?? The hell is going on here? What kind of toxic co-dependency is happening?

I wish Daniel could shield himself from Louis. This isn't a fair game.

How did they film a scene with pigeons with broken wings? I'm very concerned.

I... dislike how it's all about the cutting.

She's in there 'cause YOU wanted to 'save' here, asshole. Stfu.

I'm way too lazy to make a gifset of his hands, but manual screencaps I can do. Ahhh.

Everything about him. His anger when he read the diary. Lestat's fault? Lol. Never though I would be hating on Louis, but here I am. You're a fake bitch. <3 As if it wasn't enough that I wanted to slap you in the book, but here you are, pissing me off way before the show ends.

Surely someone giffed this??? KING!!

He's a walking, talking, breathing piece of art. Such a doll.

Holy fuck. Those hands. The combination of those nails and those hands. And if the nails were longer... Ahhh.

Meanwhile, I'm going to join the club of "Why the hell are they smoking?" Looks cool? Nah. They don't enjoy alcohol, as far as I see in this show, so why smoking? Only sex seems up their alley.

Lestat—you broke into my house when I wasn't there and now I'm going to fucking kill you—De Lioncourt :') I mean, not the cop, obviously, but it's that energy.

H-hands... All of him.

!!! For once, it is not Lestat's fault & I am LIVING. I'd gif this.

He said Family with no secrets, so he's truthful <3 I'm never going to have kids, thanks <3

Beautiful, just beautiful.

I see your reaction, Lestat. If they won't use this as foreshadowing, it's going to be a waste.

The idea of Claudia meeting a vampire of her own, out there, is nice, that I can adnit. Completely out of canon, but there's something to it. Still, I think I prefer the motivation of the book: Claudia is so tired of the abuse, of not knowing what's out there, of wanting Louis with her. "He's more like a dad"? Well, it ain't like that in the book. I like her being in love with him. I like them traveling together. I like her being eager for knowledge. This part of the story in the show? Totally not my thing. I still have some scenes in my imagination, the two riding a carriage, killing those brainless things/vampires, only meeting real ones in Paris. Claudia holding Louis' hand, trying to kiss him. Those two loving each other. Yeah, that would be a real jam.

Also, the fact that Bruce attacks her and tries to assault her. I keep thinking about what Armand said in the book, how he wouldn't turn that boy/slave of his even if he was in danger. Cause he's too young, wouldn't be able to protect himself. His body not fully grown. How he talked about "this child with you", and Claudia being stuck in a body of a freaking FIVE. YEAR. OLD.

I really like the idea of Claudia traveling with Louis better. But I'm afraid I have a very different picture in my mind than the show gives me. Something closer to the first movie. That'd be some picture. Need to rewatch the movie, definitely.

Baby, NO! I'm not ready for that. ;_;

Miserable mocking king. That chuckle is everything. I want gifs.

Leave him, Lestat, and all your problems are gone. Better be lonely than unhappy with someone. And for so many years, my goodness. What kind of shit your parents did to you so you hate yourself that much?

Also, the way his voice gets way deeper when he's angry, gloomy, screaming. Wow. Princess? Baby girl? You suuuure? He identifies like a male & he is definitely one.

Genuinely not sure what's Armand's purpose, but I'm glad he intervened. That was a very shitty thing to do of Louis. That slap to Louis from Daniel was very well deserved. Also, I'd watch Daniel and Armand being lovers. It's an intriguing idea.

Louis is obsessed with Claudia while Lestat is tired of his whining & would like to do something fun. Very much yeah.

Was about to crop to the hand, but the entire picture is a masterpiece.

Ah yes, Louis' sister arranging a gravestone for him, knowing he's supernatural. You don't care about canon, do you?

"To be Louis' sister." To be Louis' WHAT????????????? This show is a joke.

#natiswatching #tw smoking #iwtv 2022

[eveningstar477]

What are some of your favourite duos/trios from Agent Carter?

Do you have any really funny and unusual???

Ooh this is a good question! Thanks for asking!!

I mean, I'm such a sucker for the Peggy - Daniel - Jack dynamic (whether it be gen or ot3). It's my absolute favorite to write and read. It's just so interesting to think about their dynamics, especially because we see it shift so many times over the course of the show. It makes for so many good what-if scenarios between the three of them, because their relationship is volatile in a lot of ways.

If we haven't got our disaster trio all together, my next choice is probably gen Jack & Peggy, just cause I'm obsessed with 1x05 and their transition from animosity to trust and banter. Also super fun to write and read.

Gotta love Peggysous. Nothing else to be said.

Under unusual duos/trios (or at least ones that don't seem to come up terribly often on my dash), I would say the Jarvises are super fun. Ana is just such a great character, and even as little as we saw her and Jarvis together we got such a great view of their life and how well they work together.

I also really really wish we'd seen more of Violet and Rose. I mean we got like one scene in the Auerbach lobby, but imagine the epicness of the two of them together. amazing.

Anyways, that's my long-winded response. Hope this answered your question, anon!

#an ask! whee! #agent carter #daniel sousa #peggy carter #jack thompson #edwin jarvis #ana jarvis #violet #my writing #I ramble

[cblgblog]

I'm curious about your take on Wakanda being wronged hard in FaTWS, and by Bucky specifically? I haven't seen many people talk about it, but I'm just angry and confused as to why Bucky was to careless and rude towards Ayo and the Dora Milaje, acting as if their anger about Zemo was an overreaction. Hell, Walker got more respect from him in the end than the Dora did

I'm looking at the writers' perspective here, it was their decision and I'm wondering why. What was the thought behind it? Why did they make Bucky so insensitive? At first I thought it had to be some arc, but nothing came from it. I'm wondering what made them look at this series and think "Yes, let's make Bucky screw over the people that helped him".

It wasn't just him wronging Wakanda, it was his behavior towards Sam too, how he was so ignorant during the cop scene, dismissive of Sam's feelings, and obsessed with the shield to a point of lashing out at Sam for things that weren't his fault. Why was this a choice that was made? Bucky didn't have much personality in the other movies, they could've done anything but they chose this, and I think more people should talk about how wrong that is. Not for Bucky, but for the black people in the series who were wronged.

Okay so here’s the deal. One, I’m white, so know that going in, take my take on this for whatever it’s worth accordingly. Two, I haven’t watched the eps since they aired, with the exception of a couple scenes, so my memory—not so much of events but of specific nuances of how Bucky reacted to them—isn’t fresh.

I say that last part specifically because of Bucky and his interactions with Sam, because ultimately they bother me much less than the Wakanda stuff, and here’s why. Bucky is, to varying degrees depending on situation and episode, a dick to Sam about the shield for most of the series. Undoubtedly. But I get that, to a point. He at least explains his feelings in 1x05, why he reacted like that, and admits he fucked up. He had all his feelings for Steve wrapped up, incorrectly, in that shield, so when Sam just tossed it aside (from Bucky’s perspective), it caused him to freak out/lash out. Which was never fair to Sam, but at least culminated in Bucky recognizing that. Sam keeps saying to him that the two of them have not lived the same experience, the shield and its legacy do not mean the same thing to them, and Bucky finally realizes that. He acknowledges that neither he nor Steve grasped the full reality of the situation, and he apologizes. Does that erase what came before? No, but it’s not supposed to. It’s him acknowledging his own ignorance and trying to do better.

So, at least there’s an arc there, which is the other reason his stuff with Sam bugged me less. There was an evolution in his thinking, there was a change from wah wah, you gave up the shield, to oh wait, I kinda get it now. He realizes that his reactions were wrong, even if his feelings were understandable. Which, on a human level, I think they were. It’s a very human thing for Bucky to equate that shield directly to Steve, and take Sam’s rejection of it as a rejection of Steve. It’s understandable how he got there, given the bizarre nature of Steve’s time travel shenanigans, the nearly endless nightmare that Bucky’s life has been since he fell from the train. Losing yet another 5 years when he’s already lost 70+, all the unprocessed guilt and grief that isn’t helped by him having actually the worst therapist ever, oh my God this woman sucks at her job, she’s funny, but she’s awful. His feelings, I believe, were valid, given everything that went down. His reaction to them—the lashing out, whining, refusing to see Sam’s side of it—his reaction was not valid. But at least he gets to a point where he realizes that. At least there’s an arc.

Could they have found a different way to create conflict in the series? Sure, and I’m not gonna argue with anyone who wishes they had. For me personally, I was okay with it. Bucky’s ignorance and misplaced anger made sense to me. Bit of an aside, one of the few scenes I rewatched for this (because Youtube and knowing exactly where it was) was the cop scene, because you referenced. I’m assuming you mean the bit where Sam gets stopped, gets the ‘calm down sir’ treatment. I didn’t think Bucky was a dick in that scene? He seemed aware of what was happening, given his angry, “No he’s not bothering me, do you know who this is?” It’s actually one of a relatively few instances in the first 5 eps where Bucky does seem genuinely aware that he and Sam don’t live in the same world, even when they’re walking the same street, right next to each other. So, as far as illustrating that, and Bucky coming out of his own feelings long enough to pay attention to Sam’s, I thought it was one of the better scenes.

So, Sam and Bucky, I’m less bothered by. Bucky and Wakanda? That’s a hot garbage fire.

Zemo’s whole inclusion here, and nearly everything related to it, was incredibly botched. He’s randomly rich as fuck now, and a Baron, to match his comics counterpart. Which is not only an incredibly lazy retcon, it kills much of what made his character interesting in CW. In that movie, it was one guy, working alone, limited resources, dedicating himself to his cause. If nothing else, you had to admire his tenacity. Now suddenly he’s got a butler and a plane and piles of cash? Where was that in CW? More importantly…why? What purpose did it serve, besides making him more superficially similar to his comic self?

Why did we detour to him at all? None of his plans ultimately affect the larger narrative all that much. He starts out in prison and…ends up back in prison. Why? Why would the Dora just leave him there? Ayo says that they will bring Zemo back to face Wakandan justice…and then they just don’t. They leave him in the hands of the same people who lost him to two random dudes who were able to bust him out of prison on their own, one of those dudes being an entirely human guy, no enhanced powers, no Serum. In CW, okay, T’Challa did a deal with Everett Ross I guess, fine. But once the Americans proved they couldn’t hold him, it made no sense that the Dora would just go, okay, here you go again. They aren’t Batman. They have no reason to keep throwing the baddies in Arkham Asylum to wait ‘til next week when someone breaks out again.

The Zemo stuff had no arc to it. The only worthwhile thing was Bucky proving to Zemo that he can’t be controlled anymore, but that scene could have come about in a million better ways than it did. Ultimately, the weird little team-up with Zemo feels very cliché and contrived. It feels like a trip down a side road that dead ends to nowhere. It feels like filler, which is a particularly terrible crime when there’s only 6 episodes in the damn season.

Bucky’s dickishness towards Ayo and the other Dora really is baffling, especially when the writers went out of their way to give us that flashback, a direct, show don’t tell indication of all the Wakandans did for him. And it’s not his feelings for Steve that have him acting out this way, or at least it shouldn’t be. Steve has nothing to do with this aspect of things. Steve obviously had trust in and respect for T’Challa, and there’s no reason to think that wouldn’t extend to the Dora as well. Strong, badass women who put it all on the line for their country? Yeah, Steve should/would get that. He would have broken Zemo out of prison, if he thought it was the right call to make, but he also would’ve been like yeah, I did that, I understand that I fucked you over, I’m fully prepared to accept the consequences of that once my mission is complete, I’m sorry it went down like this. See the, “I’d like to surrender myself for disciplinary action,” he gives Phillips in First Avenger, after he goes to rescue the 107th. If it’s an authority he respects and acknowledges as having good intentions (Phillips as opposed to the Accords), Steve will ultimately give that respect back, even if he goes off to do his own thing first. He respected T’Challa and Wakanda. Bucky should have respected them even more, given his more direct connection, given the flashback scene in FatWS, given his acknowledgement that Wakanda and it’s people gave him a rare respite, a calm in the shit storm that’s been his life since 1945.

So yeah, it doesn’t make sense that he was so flippant and dismissive towards Ayo and the rest. It makes even less sense that they put up with it. It’s bad writing, that’s all I’ve got. The show is incredibly irritating, in that a lot of the plot-driven stuff is pretty fucking awful, but most of the character study stuff for Sam and Bucky is so good.

#Fatws #falcon and the winter soldier #Bucky Barnes #Sam Wilson

[blinkaftermidnight]

I guess I was thinking about it strictly in terms of the show...like how much of their interaction/investment in each other is based on them being a "pair." Would Fatin be as inclined to look out for Leah? Would Leah have been so obsessed with finding Fatin after their fight? I also found it interesting that they were the only ones who pretty much had zero connection with other pre-island (that we know about). It would be interesting to see if that isn't totally true in season 2. I do agree, ultimately, that their chemistry and dynamic would transcend any situation. They've got that kind of classic opposites attract thing going on. I was just pondering what the draw was for them in the first place. It's also hard to separate just what we see in the show and what we read into it as shippers. Like "you're my buddy from home" is a way different motivator than "you have pretty eyes and I want to kiss you," so maybe thinking about it at all is pointless since my mind is already firmly planted in non-canon anyway. BUT, even then, it opens up some different post-island options like you mentioned. I've seen a lot of people mention things like Leah assuming that shit won't be the same once they get home just because they got loaded onto Noah's ark two by two together. I'm rambling now...bye lol.

If you think you’re rambling, I’m REALLY about to ramble, so hang on. Let’s see if I make any sense. You’ve made a really good point. I didn’t think of it this way the first time around. Just to work with a concrete example, let’s talk about 1x05. I don’t quite see Leah’s determination to find Fatin in 1x05 as driven by a feeling of like “she’s from home so I need to find her.” It seemed more like Leah blamed herself for Fatin’s disappearance, but I’m not sure if her need to find Fatin stemmed more from their very weak home connection or if it was perhaps more linked to Leah’s guilt. I have always assumed it was more linked to Leah’s guilt over what went down between them. Maybe it would’ve been different if it’d been one of the other girls instead. Maybe Leah would’ve felt less guilty - or maybe not. Probably depends on how you read Leah’s character and how much she cares for the rest of the girls overall.

The question of “what was the draw for them in the first place” is interesting. I feel like that might be the main reason Fatin seeks Leah out in 1x01 after the game of Never Have I Ever. Fatin specifically goes to ask Leah about how she drank for Shelby’s opening NHIE, even though literally everyone but Martha and Shelby drank. Fatin, if she just wanted to strike up a friendly conversation, could’ve gone to one of the other girls but chose Leah. Why? That’s probably due to the fact that Fatin knows she goes to school with Leah, neither Leah nor Fatin knows anyone else (they don’t even know each other, but there is that one little connection), and Leah is therefore the safest choice. And maybe the fact that they’re from the same place is a little comforting, all things considered.

So maybe their hometown connection is the driving factor in the very beginning, but it seems to get less important as everyone gets to know each other. Is the main reason that Fatin ends up looking out for Leah (I’m especially thinking of the events of 1x09) due solely - or even mainly - to the fact that they go to the same school? I’m confident in saying, no, absolutely not. Even if we throw shipping aside for a minute, their friendship doesn’t appear to be based upon “oh, she’s from home.” They, as far as we know, didn’t even know each other back home! I think shit seriously changes for them after 1x04 and they kind of start from the beginning at the end of 1x05, and by then, who cares if you went to school together, right? You’re stranded on an island. Some shit happened. And that (maybe) creates more of a real bond.

I’m so tempted to compare them to the other relationships/dynamics on the island - mainly Dotin, Shoni, and Dot and Shelby - but I’ll hold off because this is already long and I’m not done yet.

Like you said, it really does open a lot of post-island possibilities. “Were we friends only because we were stranded on an island together and had very limited options?” seems like a fair question to ask. We can speculate about potential answers to that question (and incorporate it into fics, of course). The fact that they live close enough to each other to attend the same school becomes an important factor when they return home. They could stay friends without much difficulty if they wanted to (and if Fatin doesn’t fuck off to LA like she said in 1x08 lmao). So maybe it’s not a huge factor beyond, like, the pilot episode, but it could definitely come back around post-island.

I wrote a whole thing, as usual. Hopefully some of it made sense.

#roezmahree

[raayllum]

to build on your recent ask, and just to pick your brain a little (gross metaphor, I know), when you said:

"To me, the coins could never have been permanent, otherwise there's very little reason to have them exist. After all, if the parents can't be freed and/or come back, why not just kill them? It'd effect the story the same way... unless they come back." I wonder, in your experience and education in literature, do you think it is feasible/would be an effective avenue of storytelling for the writers to use the (theoretical) inability to free the coined elves as a plot device to teach Rayla about moving on, and that she can't save everyone? she is portrayed as a very determined--and sometimes obsessive--character, and I can recall the writers bringing up her strong devotion to freeing the elves as something that should be questioned (though I do believe this will involve her allowing herself to let Callum/the others help). But, nevertheless, what are your thoughts?

The thing about Rayla is that her determination, and her wanting to save everyone isn't a Flaw, per se. If anything, it's the best thing about her, and the story points that out time and time again (1x03 with the boys, 1x05 with Bait, 1x09 with Zym, 2x07 with the dragon, 3x05 with Nyx): "You have true courage, and a big heart" / "It's because Rayla is a hero. Rayla's brave. She saves people. She does what's right [....] That's what makes her a hero. That's what makes her Rayla."

It's just not only a virtue, as like real people, most of TDP's cast's best qualities are also their worst ones, depending on the circumstance. Callum can also be obsessive with magic, after all (1x04, 2x01, 2x04, 4x02) but that doesn't mean him being a mage isn't his path, or not a Good path for him, particularly when it comes to primal magic. But his persistent, perpetually pushing nature also means he can be impulsive and bite off more than he can chew, unknowingly getting in over his head before it's too late. (Whereas Rayla tends to have a better cognition of her bad odds, but just less concern over them.) If Callum's 'bad path' is being a dark mage, Rayla's 'bad path' is being a loner assassin who takes everything on alone, y'know? Those paths are both from the same places, but there are always more options than the roles they've had enforced on them or have taken up because it feels like they don't have any other choice in war, even if they have/had good intentions regardless.

This also comes back to like, Rayla's relationship with letting go vs holding on. If anything, Rayla has a laser focus on moving on - "We have to keep moving" (1x09) / "Fine, one extra day. One" (2x01) / "Rayla, you're pushing us to move too fast" (3x02) / "I'm fine, Callum, like I already told you [...] We walk away and this never happened" (3x04) - that operates to her detriment, because it's usually when she's ignoring her own pain to prioritize the mission, or putting the mission above most things (other than the boys). If she doesn't linger on her pain/mistakes, she can pretend more easily that it doesn't exist (not "I don't want to talk right now" but "There's nothing to talk about," if you will). Illusions and erasure and all that - very Moonshadow

C: So, uh, yesterday must've been a hard day for you. R: Not really.

We see this even when she comes back in S4 and her attempts to "get things back the way they were" and even her almost complete prioritization of how Callum feels, and very little regard to how she feels (outside of being nervous to see him, which 4x05 quickly reveals is the least of how she's been emotionally damaged).

And this, of course, is because Rayla is very bad, actually, at letting things go. She holds on mistakes, she repeats the same patterns of herself and others who loved but hurt her, and that's why all her self deprecation talk is very similar across the seasons

I messed up. I know I did. (1x02) / You should cut yourself a break. Everyone messes up sometimes, or in my case, all the times. [...] Right up until moment when it really matters. That's when I just, poof, mess it up... And the next thing I know, I've failed. / I dropped it. This is all my fault. I let you both down. I let the world down. (1x09) / I need my friend to trust me, and he doesn't. And I think it's my fault. (2x02 / But every time I tried, I would mess it up, and the next time it was harder, and-- (2x03) / I failed them. It was my fault we were discovered. (3x03) / It's me, and it's all my fault. I failed them. I let them all down. They were right to reject me. I'm not good enough and I never will be. (3x04) / Oh no, I messed up again! [...] This is all my fault. I left him alone. I shouldn't have-- (4x06)

Rayla is someone who is selfless to the point she doesn't know how/when to be selfish, which causes her to be selfish in ways that are extremely detrimental to herself and to the other people around her. In a lot of ways, her inability to move on is an inability to let go of her negative self perception of herself: she fears that failure for her is inevitable ("I'm sure it would've flopped when it was my turn"), she's so terrified of being alone yet continually isolates herself because that seems safer, and because of these negative perceptions, she unfairly punishes herself. For her own mistakes, and for others.

Harrow: I recognize that I may pay the price for our mistakes. / I won't hide in the body of another while someone else pays the price for my decisions. (1x02) Rayla: It will just get tighter and tighter until I lose my hand. But I'm ready to pay that price. (1x06) / But if I die, I'll just be paying the price they should've paid a long time ago. (3x08)

VS

Callum: But you didn't run. They have it all wrong. Rayla: Does it matter? (3x03) Claudia: We're not going to the dungeons, Soren! We didn't do anything wrong. (3x02)

So Rayla wanting to prioritize something over the mission that's not for the good of someone else (Callum, the dragon, Nyx, etc) but for something that she personally wants is a massive departure for her and gives her all sorts of room to grow. However, it remains to be seen if Rayla will view it like that. I could see her see saving her parents as a form of 'redemption' - even though she didn't fail them like, at all, but again: it's Rayla we're talking about. Turning it into a duty would be very on brand. "This is a journey for redemption" and all that, even if like... she doesn't Need to redeem herself.

There's layers there then, of her being 'selfish' (wanting something for herself, it being her family) and of being too 'selfless' again, semi similar to her choice to leave in TTM. Because Rayla's inability to let go is unable to be separated from the way she continually punishes/loathes herself; that's what she can't put down, the mistakes and failures she feels responsible for that she'll destroy herself to try and correct, to ensure she pays the price so that no one else has to. That's why she's obsessive about Viren (protection, punishment, self-martyrdom) and prepared to stay behind at the Storm Spire.

Her choices to save and protect Zym are a little different. She, like the princes, wants to make up for her parents' mistakes, yes, but it goes deeper than that - she truly believes that this is right and has the power to change the world for the better, to break the cycle rather than perpetuate it. To make a difference, not as a trauma response, but in the vein of healing.

TLDR; to summarize, I think Rayla's parents, particularly Runaan, have a great capacity to help her unlearn the harmful patterns they've passed down, whether because she's grown beyond them and can help her parents do the same, or in seeing their behaviour and correcting hers, or in having them realize how they messed her up, and saving her right back.

None of this really touches on how TDP's hero side is staunchly big on protecting the value of the individual, and their right to exist/thrive without prejudice/expectation, by laying yourself down (as opposed to offering up others' lives), but I think that's absolutely a component as well. TDP's hopepunk theme - Breaking the cycle, working towards harm reduction, reconciling rather than reinforcing binaries - are all in favour of saying "you can't save everyone, but you should still always Try" (hi Ezran in 3x04) and I don't think they'd toss that out, either. In a world with magic, they could've taken the concept of the Moon Nexus and Rayla wanting to see them again for the same end (which, in TTM, Rayla doesn't think she can save her parents per se - she just wants to know if they're actually dead or not), but uh. They didn't so yeah, particularly because Runaan living means all sorts of messy feelings for Callum and happy gay reunion elves, them living absolutely holds the most merit for the narrative, tbh

#thanks for asking #moon fam #tdp rayla #mini meta #requests #analysis series #analysis #hoothalcyon #hero motif #theme: duality #also pick my brain away #characterization #by mistake