#and for production I am just!!!!!! it makes me so happy to see him find something that makes him happy

[starwarsbean]

Love Against the Odds

-Pairing: Tech x F! Reader

-Warnings: Fake Dating! Modern Universe! Slowburn! Smut & Fluff! Sexual Tension! NSFW.

- A/N: Hi to those who read this! Sorry for the delay but here’s the next chapter. I miss the bad batch and the finale was amazing. The next chapters will be more detailed. 18+!

-Summary: Tech is a successful CEO of a technology company. His commitment to his work has given him success in his career. However, he is not interested in trying love. Tech neglecting the important parts of life. His brothers urge him to give it a shot, as they believe finding a romantic partner will make him happy. Tech comes up with a brilliant idea to fake date to trick his brothers.

Chapter 5

Being so productive at work had put a lot of strain into your day. Loads of paperwork and never ending gossip in your workplace. Digging through loads of files and documents finding that one piece of information you needed. Your own thoughts drift off to him. Tech. His honey comb brown eyes. The way he would half smile would turn in a curve full smile. It made you weak in the knees. The way his figure looked in his outfits. His shoulders and arms were a very nice tone of muscle. How were you suppose to not fall for him? It was such impossible concept of separating yourself in this situation. After losing concentration on trying to find the document you needed for work. A loud buzz came from your cell phone. Checking it quickly to see to see if it was him. Your heart starts beating faster, you break into a smile

“Today marks the start of a new opportunity progress for us to be able to make this work. I look forward to seeing you later.”

After rereading Techs message with a smile. you realize you haven’t responded back yet. Unsure of what to say. You didn’t want to mess this up or even scare him off. Taking a deep breath to figure out to say.

“Looking forward to seeing you too Tech.” You quickly put your phone down after hitting send. After a few minutes you back into work mode on your computer. As a couple minutes go by receiving another message from Tech.

“Would you like to come to my place for dinner tonight after work? I am planning on making roasted bantha filet, a classic Mandalorian dish, paired with a side of crispy mashed potatoes and glazed vegetables. Please let me know if you are available and if you have any dietary restrictions or preferences. I look forward seeing you.”

Reading his message brought a smile to your face. He was sweet and sincere asking if you had any restrictions. Seeing him tonight was now the highlight of your day. Looking at the time seeing you get off in 10 minutes. Quickly cleaning up your desk and organizing papers for the next day. You signed off and headed out the building. Pulling out your phone to respond back to him.

“Yes, I can make it. I just got out of work.” After hitting send the excitement hit you that you were going to see him. Walking to your car, you see another message from tech with the address of his place. After sitting down you message back giving him a heads up you’re on your way.

“Drive safe cyar'ika.”

After reading his last message got you confused. You never heard of this word before. What did that mean? Maybe it was a typo or some type of error. Pushing this thought away to focus on the road. Being so impatient to arrive. Driving to Techs place you realized he lived in a nice neighborhood.
Once you arrive to his place. You park and sit in your car debating to go up to the door or to text him you’re here. As you battle your unsure thoughts you decide just to go up and knock.

As you get to techs front door. You’re about to knock till Tech opens the door right away. You laugh softly to yourself. Finding it cute how he opened the door before you even got the chance to knock. Tech clears his throat and offers you to come in with his hands. Looking around his place was a nice clean place. You could smell the fresh pine of his home. Giving it right away he just cleaned up his place. Pictures of it seem like his family. A cute photograph of it seems to be a girl with blonde hair and four other guys.

“Those are my brothers and that is my sister.” Tech says interrupting your thoughts.

“She’s very pretty. What’s her name?” You ask looking at him.

“Omega is her name. Her curiosity and empathetic nature have made her an incredible part of our family.” Tech says while he pushes up his goggles.

“She sounds very lovely.” You say following him to the kitchen.

“She is. You will meet her and my brothers as it is part of our agreement.” Tech pulls out a chair for you to sit. Giving him a little thanks. As you sit you look to see where Tech went.

“I am serving us. Do not worry I got it under control.” He says a bit , but you can hear a bit uncertainty. Smiling as you see him struggle a bit plating the food nicely.

“You know I can help you.” Giggling a bit as you watch him. He looks up at you and shakes his head.

“Nonsense. You are my guest. As a host I have to make sure everything is perfect.” He says determined to plate it nicely. You roll your eyes at his determination. Standing up from your chair to walk over to him. The mess of the food cut up into pieces. Tech struggling to plate the mash potatoes neatly. The glaze vegetables still weren’t finished yet. You look at tech and softly chuckle.

“Here let me help. I think we’re both very hungry after work.” You say grabbing the rosemary and thyme. Giving him a soft smile.

Tech looks at you and nods. Giving you a soft smile. “Very well then. I must check on the glazed vegetables.”

Placing the thyme and rosemary on the bantha meat. Tech walks over to the glaze vegetables. Lifting the lid from the pan the steam fogs up his goggles. You laugh as the fog blocks his view. He lifts up his goggles to let the fog pass. He tries not to laugh as he’s a bit embarrassed. You see him without his goggles on making you quiver inside. A perfect view of his eyes. He catches you looking at him for long. Quickly moving your attention to the meat.

“I should’ve known that was going to happen.” He says stirring the glazed vegetables. You chuckle at his response.

“All that matters is the food isn’t burnt.” You say taking a bite of one of the carrots on the cutting board. Tech looks at at you with amusement.

“Right. How was your day?” Tech says playing the glazed vegetables on two plates. It was a bit out of no where that he asked. You smile and sigh.

“Well it could’ve been better. I just had lots of paperwork. I couldn’t find this particular document I needed. So, it was okay.” You say cutting up pieces of the bantha meat.

Tech stares at you as you cut up the bantha meat. He admires your honesty into giving a bit of detail on your workday. He walks over to you. Placing his hands on top of yours to help you cut up pieces of the bantha meat. Your heart flutters as his hand tops your hand. You look up at him seeing his brown eyes behind his goggles looking down at you.

“Am I cutting it wrong?” You ask softly not breaking eye contact with him.

“Uh well yes, however it’s okay. To cut up bantha meat, you first need to properly prepare the meat by removing any excess fat and trimming any tendons. Then, use a large, sharp knife to cut the meat into desired portions, such as steaks, chops, or cubes, depending on your recipe and desired serving size. You can also cut the meat into smaller pieces for tenderizing it.” He info dumps while helping you cut the meat in the correct way. You listen to him but can’t help as to laugh.

“I apologize if I overshared information and overwhelmed you.” He says pulling away and placing the food on the plates.

“It’s okay I really don’t mind. It’s actually really good information to know now! Hey, now I know how to properly cut up bantha meat.” You say giving him a wink while smiling.

Tech just looks at you with a smile and nods. He finished plating the food while walking to the dinner table. Following behind him you take the chair to sit next to him.

“Would you like red wine with your meal?” Tech ask as he walks over to his cabinet

“Actually, I’ll be fine with just water.” Tech nods as he walks to get you a cup of water. Grabbing both water cups he hands your cup. Thanking him as he hands your water. Tech takes a seat next to you.

“The food smells fantastic. You did a great job Tech.” You say taking a bite of your vegetables.

“Of course I did, but I did have your assistance.” He stares at you while taking a small bite of the bantha meat.

Taking a sip of your water and having a nice quiet moment. The silverware hitting the plates as you both dig into your delicious meals. You clear your throat and break the silence.

“Tech, tell me a bit more about your family. What should I know when I meet them.”

Tech eyes widen a bit behind his glasses. Almost forgetting this was not an actual date.

Tech sighs. “My family is not like most families. I have four brothers named Wrecker, Crosshair, Echo, and Hunter. Along with a sister named Omega. Once you meet them you’ll see their own personalities.”

You nod listening to him. Trying to remember all their names. “Okay that’s good to know. Is there anything specific I should remember about them?”

Tech swallows his food before talking. He thinks for a moment pushing up his glasses. “Wrecker enjoys cooking and coming up with new recipe ideas. Hunter and Crosshair enjoy being out in nature. Omega has a great range of games she enjoys playing. While, Echo enjoys communicating with others and attending conventions.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad to remember.” You say taking a bite of your food.

“It is not hard. I rather you just be yourself around them.” Tech says glancing at you.

You smile at his response. “I know just wanted to get an idea of them.”

Tech looks back at his food. “Of course. If this is hard for you. I understand.”

“No it’s not. I could handle it.”

Both of you go back to eating your meal. Tech looks at you realizing he hasn’t asked much about you.

Tech gets a bit nervous on what he should. He takes a sip of his drink. Then looks at you. “How are your family like?”

You smile drops at the sudden question. Your eyes scan the room unsure of what to say. Not wanting to make eye contact with him. “I don’t really get along with my family much. It’s sort of complicated.”

Tech sees you’re not making eye contact. He feels a bit guilty for asking such a personal question. Before he could say anything you interrupt.

“I moved out here to be on my own. I talk to my family once in a while. We just aren’t close. People don’t stay in contact nor even want to try to stay connected. So, I came out here to see what opportunities I could find for myself.” You say taking a sip of water.

Tech nods and gives you a soft smile. “I’m glad to hear you took the risk of being on your own. It can be quite a challenge. Life does requires us to take risks even if doesn’t go as planned. That’s the beauty of it.”

You look into techs eyes. As he’s already staring into your eyes. You did not expect to hear this coming from him. The smile that appeared on your face was obvious you were falling for him. The heart flutters in your chest. You swear your pupils could turn into hearts if they could by the way you looked at him. Catching yourself off guard you clear your throat.

“Thank you Tech that was rather well sweet.” You say softly looking at him.

Techs eyes having a bit of a different shade as he’s making eye contact with you. He turns away and looks down at his plate. You could swear he was acting a bit shy. Tech palms were becoming sweaty. His heart beating faster than usual. He was confused on why it was happening.

“Of course. Did you enjoy your meal?” Tech ask still not looking at you. He takes a sip of his drink. Trying not to drop the cup as his palms were sweaty. You chuckle a bit.

“Yes it was delicious. Thank you for inviting me over for dinner.” Grabbing your plate as you stand up. Tech quickly puts his drink down and stands. He grabs his plate and your plate from your hands.

“Here I insist I take the plates. You can stay put.” He says grabbing the plates and quickly placing them in the sink. You sit back down while watching him rinse off the plates. Pulling out your phone you realize the time. It was late and you both had work the next day. Tech sits back down next to you as he notices the time on his watch.

“I should get going. It’s pretty late and I don’t want to keep you up.”

Tech looks down at his watch and nods. “You wouldn’t necessarily be keeping me up. I rather stay up doing work.”

You could imagine him staying up late doing work. His head buried into his technological thinking. It would be hard to distract a busy man like him. Chuckling at his response it made you think he wanted you to stay. Oh I believe that. It sucks I have to work tomorrow.”

Tech slightly frowns and nods. “Oh yes. you should be heading home. I will schedule us another day to discuss more information about our fake relationship.”

Tech walks with you to the car. Comfortable silence between you both. As you both walk you look up at the stars. Tech looks at you wondering why you stopped. His brown eyes gazing upon your face. The way your eyes sparkled looking into the night skies. The wind blowing your hair which made your hair cover a bit of your face. Your fingers pushing a piece of your hair behind your ear. Your soft smile as you were focused on the view. Tech realizes how hard he was staring at you. He looks up at the stars. For once Tech doesn’t say anything as he’s just enjoying the moment with you.

“I had a great time tech. I’ll see you later.” You say as you wave at him. Tech gazes at you as he watches you get inside your car.
You felt as if tech needed to say something. You pulled down your passenger window

“Perhaps you could text me once you’re home. As I will know you made it home safely.” Tech says a bit softly as he’s still standing from the sidewalk.

He was thoughtful and that’s one thing you enjoyed about him. “Will do. Goodnight Tech.” You say as you finally drive away.

Tech watches you drive off as he makes sure you drive off first. He walks back inside as his mind is set on you the entire night.

#the bad batch #tech x reader #tech bad batch #tech x you #tbb tech #bad batch fanfic #clone trooper crosshair #hunter bad batch #star wars #star wars fanfiction #wrecker bad batch #bad batch #modern au #clone trooper echo #tbb crosshair #tbb fanfiction

[bandsanitizer]

my second listen with lyrics in front of me of 5sos5 has made me decide this is my favorite 5sos album. the focus on growth that this album tackles and the storyline that the lyrics paint of that concept—of different obstacles in life, the relatable struggle with identity but also the aspects of it so specific to the band—I think they beautifully captured the dizzying feeling figuring yourself out can create, especially as you navigate the relationships in your life.

I think the album also reflects the band very well sonically, with a clearer sound imo that says 5sos. something that takes their inspirations and influences and interests, and couples it with their own art and vision. lyrically and vocally it’s just some of their strongest work yet. while I think the “the feeling of falling upwards” captures the experience of the album’s feeling, I do think the palindrome of 5sos5 captures how much the album reflects on them and their careers, but also looks a bit towards the future.

and in the carousel idea of them being on a spinning ride called life, the full circle idea that a palindrome can represent is fitting for the album. so while I still hope for the day 5sos gives us the kind of album title that the feeling of falling upwards could’ve been, I’m very happy with 5sos5 and so incredibly proud of them. whether it’s the vocals or songwriting or instrumentation or concept or production, this album really is their best yet

#5sos #5sos5 #alison speaks? #ot4 #5 seconds of summer #also the younger me that’s been listening to them for almost 10 years now feels so happy about this album being something they created #something with a focused sound that sounds like them (then again i don’t listen to a lot of their more recent inspiration so idk if that’s #the most accurate statement) #but it does feel a lot more genuine to their intentions in music that calm was #and it feels much more focused than youngblood did #and it takes their inspirations and really runs with them creating their own art #that perhaps the fitting into some specific mold or just being younger as a band and artists that the first two album didn’t have #i’m beyond proud of how far they have come and what they’ve accomplished with the album #and beyond that I’m so truly happy and proud of michael #like yes to all of them bc damn they really stepped up their song writing game #but michael singing a WHOLE song?? him taking on producing majority of the album?? #a lot of people worried when he didn’t have many writing credits on youngblood #and the band has definitely moved away from the level of vocal switching that the first two albums had #so to see michael own that song (oh and jbh from tfofu)…….. i’m so happy and proud of him #and for production I am just!!!!!! it makes me so happy to see him find something that makes him happy #something that allows him to create with the band that he finds fitting for himself #also thinking about it it makes a lot of sense too bc for a band that cares so much of what they do live #it makes sense to put one of them on the production side to help create music for studio and live play #that limits what gets lost in the changes and helps to bring out the coolest of each version #okay that is all

[flwrstqr]

— HOW TO LOSE A GUY IN 10 DAYS (LHS - 이희승)

SYNOPSIS ! an advice writer, you, starts on a bold new project for an article aiming to explain how to drive a man away in just 10 days. your editor is supports, so you set out to find a suitable man for her experiment. meanwhile, executive heeseung is equally confident in his ability to make any woman fall in love with him within 10 days. when you and heeseung cross paths, things slightly go off plan.

THE CAST heeseung x writer! fem reader

GENRE s2l, fluff, comedy, romance

WORD COUNT 5k+

WARNINGS parties, kissing, small grammar errors, yn kind of playing with heeseung at first, swearing, angst, crying

DANi NOTEZ hii this is for my liz's new event!!! this i based the rom com, how to lose a guy in 10 days. i kind of changed up scenes but the main idea and plot is based on the iconic 2000s movie. i've been writing this for abt 2-3 days? i thought it was good enough for liz' event so here i am. anyways i hope u enjoy it ><

BEING A WRITER HAS BEEN YOUR NUMBER ONE GOAL EVER SINCE HIGH SCHOOL. Now, at age 23, you were finally standing at the gates of the biggest magazine company ever. The sight alone sent chills down your spine, filling you with exhilaration.

Taking a deep breath, you pushed open the doors and stepped inside. The bustling activity, the hum of the printer, and the aroma of bitter coffee greeted you. You made your way to the elevator and anxiously pressed the button for the 17th floor.

Upon arrival, you awkwardly walked into the office. Your heart was pounding, and your knees were slightly shaking. You approached the manager's office and opened the door, finding yourself sitting in front of your section's main manager.

"YN LN?" the woman asked.

"Yes, ma'am," you replied stiffly, nerves evident in your voice.

"Welcome to our magazine company," she greeted, shaking your sweaty hand.

"Thank you," you responded with your usual sweet smile.

"Well, why don't you get to work?" she laughed. Your eyes widened, and you quickly stammered an apology, rushing to find your new desk and start brainstorming ideas.

For nearly two hours, you gazed out the window, feeling empty. No ideas were coming to you. It always seemed that the best ideas came at the worst times, and now, when you needed them most, your mind was blank.

"YN, just think…" you whispered to yourself, running your fingers through your hair. You glanced around the office, hoping for inspiration. Your eyes settled on a young man and woman engaged in a flirtatious conversation. Watching them smile and laugh together made you wonder if they were a couple or just interested in each other. (happy couples really did give you an ick.)

Then, it happened. The perfect idea. An idea that could possibly get you promoted and shake the whole world.

Quickly scribbling on your paper, the title snapped into your mind: "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days."

YOU MIGHT BE WONDERING, how do you even lose a guy in 10 days? Easy—just find a guy and drive him away by doing stereotypical “girl things.” Sounds like a piece of cake, right?

“YN, that is one of the BEST ideas I’ve ever heard!” your editor, Yeseo, exclaims.

“Really?” you ask, eagerly smiling.

“It’s perfect! It would catch everyone’s attention!” Yeseo explains, her eyes lighting up as she imagines the situation.

“So, how are you going to write this?” Yeseo raises an eyebrow.

“I’ll try it out myself and document my experiences. That way, it’s more authentic,” you shrug.

“That sounds great. Just journal your experiences each day,” Yeseo nods, agreeing with your plan. “I’m so excited to see the final product, YN. Email me once you’re finished, and we’ll get it published within weeks.”

You give her a quick smile before leaving her office, ready to start your new adventure.

PARTIES. USUALLY ONE OF THE THINGS YOU ABSOLUTELY HATED. The noise of couples kissing, people screaming, and music blasting through the speakers was just not your thing. The way sweaty bodies brush against each other as they chug alcohol. Parties are truly the thing you hate the most.

“So you’re telling me your new article for the magazine is about how to get a boy to dump you in 10 days?” Karina raised her eyebrow.

“In other words, yes,” you smiled. “I mean, what’s the worst that can happen?”

“Possibly it not working,” Giselle interjected.

“Well, it will. I’ve planned the whole thing,” you grinned with a hint of pride. “My editor was impressed. I’m sure it’ll work.”

“If you say so,” Karina laughed at your confidence.

“So basically, YN will get a boyfriend before me?” Ningning asked, shocked.

“Well, he’s not gonna be my boyfriend. He’s more like a test,” you replied uncertainty. As you continued to explain your plan, you felt a gaze fixed on you from across the room.

A FEW MINUTES BEFORE

“I bet you can’t get a girlfriend,” Jake joked.

“I can,” Heeseung rolled his eyes.

“Wanna bet on it, then?” Jake's eyes glinted with playfulness.

“Deal,” Heeseung confirmed.

“If you get that girl over there as your girlfriend, then I’ll give you a thousand dollars.” Jake smirked, pointing at you across the room.

“Her?” Heeseung raised his eyebrow as he checked you out. You were pretty to his eyes, though he wasn’t sure if he had the courage to approach you.

“Yup, her,” Jake grinned.

“Deal, I’ll have her in my arms within a day,” Heeseung winked before walking over to ask for your number.

NOW

“No way my plan will fail–” your voice stopped as Heeseung approached, tapping your shoulder lightly.

“Hi,” he greeted you with a welcoming smile.

“Uh, hi?” you replied, confused.

“You’re kind of cute. Can I get your number?” Heeseung asked, the words not quite rolling off his tongue as he had never done this before.

Your cheeks burned slightly as you stared. “Sure?” He was quite cute, with his sweet smile and perfectly styled hair. You gave him your number, and he mentioned he would text you later before walking off.

“YN, you know what that means?” Giselle raised her eyebrow.

“Huh?” you looked confused.

“You can use him as your test,” Winter recalled. Your eyes then widened. Perfect! He would be the perfect subject for your new article. Now, how were you going to make him yours?

YOU SIT ON YOUR BED, staring at your phone, debating whether to text Heeseung first. Your fingers hover over the keyboard, a mixture of nervousness and excitement bubbling inside you. Finally, you take a deep breath and type out a message.

YN: Hi, it’s YN. We met at the party earlier, you asked for my number. :)

You hit send and immediately feel a rush of anxiety. What if he doesn’t respond? What if he thinks you’re weird? You try to distract yourself by scrolling through social media, but the minutes feel like hours. Suddenly, your phone buzzes.

Heeseung: Hey, of course I remember. How's your night going? 

YN: It’s going good, just relaxing now. How about you?

Heeseung: Same here. Just got home. That party was a bit too much for me, tbh

You smile, feeling a little more at ease.

YN: Agreed, not rlly a party person lmao

Heeseung: Really? Me neither. I actually prefer a quiet night with some good music.

YN: Same, what kind of music do you like?

Heeseung: I listen to a lot like R&B and indie ig

YN: oh rlly? Same w me 

Heeseung: oh that’s cool

Heeseung: also wanna meet up one day?

YN: That would be amazing. I’m totally up for it.

Heeseung: Cool, it’s a date then. :)

You can’t help but smile at his message, feeling a flutter of excitement.

YN: Sounds like a plan.

Heeseung: It’s getting late. I should probably get some sleep. But I’m glad we got to talk tonight.

YN: Me too. Sleep well, Heeseung. Talk to you tomorrow?

Heeseung: Definitely. Goodnight, YN. :)

You set your phone down, a smile still on your face. This might just be the start of something interesting.

YOU TAKE A DEEP BREATH, smoothing out your outfit one last time before stepping into the restaurant. Heeseung is already there, waiting at a table near the window. He spots you and waves, a warm smile spreading across his face. You give a small smile back. 

“Hi,” you greet him as you sit down.

“Hey,” he replies, “You look great.”

“Thanks, you too.”

The waiter comes over to take your orders, and there’s a moment of awkward silence as you both look at the menus.

“So, uh, do you come here often?” Heeseung asks, attempting to break the ice.

“Actually, it’s my first time,” you admit.

“I see,” Heeseung awkwardly laughs. 

AFTER DINNER, you both step outside into the cool evening air, feeling more comfortable in each other’s presence.

“That was really nice,” Heeseung says, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“Yeah, it was,” you agree, feeling a sense of relief that the awkwardness from earlier has faded.

You walk side by side down the quiet street, enjoying the peaceful atmosphere.

“Do you live far from here?” Heeseung asks, breaking the silence.

“Not too far. Just a few blocks away,” you reply, glancing at him.

“Oh I see,” he says, smiling.

As you continued walking, the two of you began to chatter off. The conversation flows effortlessly, and you find yourself laughing at his jokes and sharing your own stories.

“Did you see the sunset earlier?” Heeseung asks, pointing to the sky, which is now painted with shades of orange and pink.

“Yeah, it was beautiful,” you say, smiling at the sight.

“I had a really good time tonight,” Heeseung says, looking at you with a soft smile.

“Me too,” you reply, feeling a warmth spread through you.

As you reach your street, you both come to a stop.

“Well, I guess this is where we part ways,” Heeseung says, looking a little reluctant to leave.

“Yeah,” you say, feeling a twinge of disappointment.

“Thanks for tonight, YN. I had a great time,” he says, stepping closer to you, “Maybe another time we can hang out again.” 

“Thank you too, Heeseung. That sounds great,” you reply, feeling a rush of happiness.

 YOU DECIDE IT'S TIME TO PUT YOUR PLAN INTO ACTION. You’ve thought through every detail, determined to see if your article concept works in real life. Step one: find an ugly dog and some hideous clothes. You’ve got the perfect ideas in mind.

You meet Heeseung outside his apartment, holding a small, scruffy dog with a face only its owner could love. You flash him a bright smile as he opens the door.

“Surprise!” you exclaim. “I got us a dog!”

Heeseung’s eyes widen as he takes in the sight of the dog. “Uh, wow, YN. That’s…unexpected.”

“Isn’t he adorable?” you gush, ignoring the bewilderment on Heeseung’s face. “I named him Snuggles.”

“Snuggles, huh?” Heeseung says, trying to muster enthusiasm. “Yeah, he’s…something.”

You place Snuggles in Heeseung’s arms, watching as the dog licks his face with an enthusiastic, slobbery tongue. Heeseung grimaces slightly but manages a strained smile.

“Let’s take him for a walk,” you suggest brightly, grabbing a garishly colored leash from your bag.

Later that evening, you bring out the next part of your plan: an outfit so hideous that it should be impossible for Heeseung to bear. You hand him a neon green tracksuit with orange polka dots and a pair of mismatched shoes.

“I thought we could match!” you say, revealing your identical outfit. “Isn’t it fun?”

Heeseung looks at the clothes, then back at you, clearly unsure how to respond. “Wow, YN. This is…unique.”

“You don’t like it?” you ask, pouting slightly.

“No, no, it’s great,” he says quickly. “I’ll just, uh, go change.”

When he returns, you both look like you’ve stepped out of a bad 80s workout video. You can’t help but laugh at the absurdity, but Heeseung seems to be struggling to keep a straight face.

“Let’s go grab dinner,” you say, linking your arm with his. “I made reservations at that fancy restaurant downtown.”

At the restaurant, the two of you turn heads as you walk in, dressed in your eye-searing outfits. The hostess tries to maintain her professionalism as she leads you to your table, but you can see the corners of her mouth twitching.

Throughout dinner, you do your best to be as irritating as possible. You chew with your mouth open, talk loudly, and insist on ordering the strangest items on the menu.

“Are you sure you want the pizza?” Heeseung asks, a note of disbelief in his voice.

“Absolutely,” you reply, grinning. “And I think you should try it too!”

Heeseung hesitates but eventually nods. “Sure, why not?” 

Here you were, sitting on your bed as you write your story. Typing away and zoning out, it had to be working right? He obviously would be over you by next week. All you needed was one more shove to drive him away soon as possible. Just 5 more days..

YOU PUSH YOUR CART THROUGH the aisles of the grocery store, scanning the shelves for the items on your list. As you reach for a box of cereal, you hear a familiar voice behind you.

“YN?”

You turn to see Heeseung approaching, a smile lighting up his face. “Oh, hi Heeseung,” you say with a smile.

“Nice to see you here,” he says, falling into step beside you.

“Yeah, I just needed to grab a few things,” you reply, feeling a bit flustered by his presence.

Heeseung nods, and for a moment, there’s an awkward silence as you both continue browsing. Suddenly, you realize you can’t reach the item you need on the top shelf.

“Um, Heeseung, do you think you could help me with something?” you ask, feeling a bit embarrassed.

“Of course, what do you need?” he replies, stepping closer.

“I just need to grab that box up there,” you say, pointing to the top shelf.

“Sure thing,” Heeseung says, reaching up to grab the box.

But as he stretches, you accidentally bump into him, causing him to lose his balance. In a split second, you reach out to steady him, but instead, you end up stumbling backward, crashing to the ground on top of him. Your face merely inches from each other. 

“I’m sorry about that!” you exclaim, your face burning with embarrassment.

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” he says, his cheeks also flushed as he helps you up.

“Um, we should probably get up,” you say, feeling flustered.

“Yeah, definitely,” Heeseung agrees, scrambling to his feet.

You both straighten your clothes and try to regain your composure, but the awkwardness lingers in the air.

“Well, um, thanks for trying to help,” you say, feeling a bit embarrassed.

“Anytime,” Heeseung replies with a sheepish smile. You exchange a quick awkward glance before awkwardly walking back to do your own things.

YOU AND HEESEUNG STEP INTO THE DIMLY LIT MOVIE THEATER, the smell of popcorn filling the air. You’ve been looking forward to this night out, hoping it will help end your plan to drive him away. As you settle into your seats, the lights dim, and the movie begins.

The film is a romantic comedy, and as the story unfolds, you find yourself getting lost in the plot. But when the characters share a kiss on screen, you feel a sudden tension between you and Heeseung.

You glance at him out of the corner of your eye, and you can see that he’s watching you, his expression unreadable. You both look away awkwardly, feeling a flush of embarrassment.

As the movie progresses, the tension between you only grows. You can feel Heeseung’s eyes on you, and you struggle to focus on the screen, your heart pounding in your chest.

Suddenly, as another kiss happens, Heeseung leans in closer to you. You freeze, unsure of what to do. Is he going to kiss you? But then, almost as if on cue, Heeseung leans in closer, his lips hovering just inches from yours. His breath mingles with yours, his warm exhales tickling your skin as he leans in, his lips drawing closer to yours. You can feel the gentle brush of his breath against your mouth, sending shivers down your spine. 

Your heart pounds in your chest as you feel the warmth of his breath against your skin. And then, in a heartbeat, he closes the gap between you, his lips pressing softly against yours. It’s a gentle kiss, but hesitant at first, but soon it deepens. You can’t help but respond, your hands finding their way to his shoulders.

You melt into the kiss, losing yourself in the sensation of his lips against yours.  When you finally pull away, your heart is racing, and your mind is buzzing with emotions. You meet Heeseung’s gaze, and you can see the same uncertainty reflected in his eyes.

“Wow,” he whispers, his voice barely audible over the sound of the movie.

“Yeah,” you murmur, at a loss for words.

As the movie comes to an end, you both sit in silence, the weight of what just happened hanging in the air. But despite the awkwardness, you can’t shake the feeling that something has shifted between you.

As you leave the theater, you can’t help but replay the kiss in your mind, feeling a sense of warmth and longing that you can’t ignore. And as you walk hand in hand with Heeseung, you realize with a start that maybe, just maybe, you’re falling in love.

AS YOU LIE IN BED THAT NIGHT, the events of the evening replay in your mind. The gentle touch of Heeseung's lips against yours, the warmth of his embrace—it all stuck in your head. 

You stare up at the ceiling, think to yourself.  Love? It's a word you're not ready to utter, a feeling too intense to comprehend. You try to push the thought aside. 

You roll onto your side, pulling the covers tighter around you. You couldn’t be in love? All that effort you put in to get rid of him. It was your 8th day, just two more days. You couldn’t do it anymore. As you drift off to sleep, the question echoes in your mind. Are you falling in love with Heeseung? 

THE REALIZATION HITS YOU like a ton of bricks, leaving you feeling breathless. Could it be true? Are you actually falling in love with Heeseung?

The thought consumes you as you go about your day. By the time evening arrives, you can't shake the feeling that you needed to end it.

Summoning every ounce of courage, you pick up your phone and dial your editor's number. When she answers, you get yourself together for the conversation ahead.

"Hey, it's me," you begin, "I need to talk to you about the article."

There's a pause on the other end of the line, and you can almost hear the curiosity in her voice as she responds. "Sure, what's up?"

"I… I can't write it," you admit, the words feeling like a confession. "I just don't feel right about it anymore."

There's a moment of silence before your editor speaks again, her tone firm."No, you're writing it," she says, leaving no room for argument.

"But—" you start to protest, but she cuts you off before you can continue.

"No buts," she insists. "We've already agreed on the topic, and you're the best person for the job. I expect to see the first draft on my desk by the end of the week."

You sigh, feeling defeated. It's clear that your editor isn't going to budge on this issue, and you know that arguing further would be a waste.

"Okay," you say reluctantly, resigning yourself to the task at hand. "I'll get it done."

AS YOU SIT ON YOUR COUCH, trying to make sense of everything that's happened, until you hear Heeseung pick up a call. 

“ Heeseung!" Jake's voice crackles through the phone, filled with excitement. "So, have you sealed the deal yet? Win YN over?"

Your heart skips a beat at the mention of your name and you instinctively lean in closer, eager to hear his response. But as you listen, the color drains from your face, and a cold dread settles in the pit of your stomach.

"The bet that I could get YN in 10 days?," Heeseung's voice comes through the phone, his words cutting through the air, "I thought I could, but…" 

Your heart shatters. Your knees started to shake. How could you have been so blind? How could you have let yourself fall for someone who was playing a game with your feelings?

Before you can hear the rest of his sentence, you leave the room silently. "I thought I could, but…" The words replay in your head.As the reality sinks in, you realize that you may have just broken your own heart, listening in on a conversation that was never meant for your ears.  He played with you. He was using you. You feel like a fool, blindsided by the truth that's been staring you in the face all along. 

You walk yourself to the nearest taxi before coming back to your empty apartment. You lie on bed, your palms on your eyes, sobbing quietly. Why should you care? I mean he was just an experiment — right? 

THE MORNING SUNLIGHT FILTERS through the curtains as you sit on your bed, thoughts rushing through your mind. The wounds from last night were still raw, as you feel tired and sick. You kew what you have to do. You began to type your last paragraph of the article before submitting it to your editor. 

With the article sent, you feel a mix of anxiety and relief. You know the revised piece is honest and raw, reflecting your own experience. But there’s one more thing you need to do to truly move forward.

To: Editor Yeseo

Subject: Resignation Letter

Dear Yeseo,

I am writing to formally resign from my position as a writer, effective immediately. I appreciate the opportunities I have had here and the support from the team, but I must prioritize my well-being at this time.

Thank you for your understanding.

Sincerely, YN

You hit send, feeling an overwhelming amount of pain. Being a writer had been your dream job, but now, it feels like a chapter you need to close. As you sit in your now-quiet apartment, you feel a pang of sadness. The memories of the past few weeks with Heeseung linger, but you push them aside. 

You start with your closet, pulling out clothes and sorting them into piles: keep, donate, and toss. You take down the photos and posters from the walls, each one a reminder of the life you’re leaving behind.

Next, you move to the kitchen, packing up dishes, utensils, and small appliances. You wrap everything carefully, methodically, as if each item represents a piece of your heart that you’re trying to protect. 

Your phone buzzes with messages from Heeseung, but you ignore them. Making them be left on delivered. You move to the living room, packing up books, DVDs, and mementos. You’re not just packing up your belongings; you’re packing up your old life, preparing to move on and start new.

IN HIS DIMLY LIT APARTMENT, Heeseung sits on the edge of his bed, the glow of his laptop screen casting shadows across his face. His heart pounds in his chest as he opens the email attachment—a document titled "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days—And Fall in Love in the Process" by [Your Name].

As the page loads, he takes a deep breath, steeling himself for what he's about to read. The cursor hovers over the first paragraph, and with a trembling hand, he begins to scroll down. 

Heeseung sits at his desk, his heart pounding in his chest as he reads the article that has just landed in his inbox. With each word, his emotions spiral into a whirlwind of confusion and disbelief.

"When I set out to write this article..."

He reads the opening sentence, his brow furrowing in confusion. What article is this? And why does it sound so familiar?

As he continues to read, the pieces start to fall into place. The description of the article, the unexpected turn of events—it's all too familiar, too painful to ignore.

"I met someone who was supposed to be just a test subject..."

Heeseung's breath catches in his throat as he realizes what he's reading. This is about him. About the bet, about the article he overheard, about everything.

He reads on, his heart pounding louder with each passing sentence:

When I set out to write this article, the plan was simple: follow a set of steps to make a guy dump me in ten days. It was supposed to be a fun, light-hearted challenge—a piece to entertain our readers. But life, as it often does, had other plans.

I met someone who was supposed to be just a test subject. But as the days went by, something unexpected happened. The more I tried to push him away, the closer we became. Every awkward moment, every forced argument, every silly plan to drive him away only brought us closer together.

I found myself laughing at his jokes, looking forward to our time together, and, against all odds, feeling a connection I hadn't anticipated. What started as a challenge turned into a journey of discovery—not just about him, but about myself.

I realized that love isn't something you can plan or control. It sneaks up on you when you least expect it, breaking down the walls you've carefully built around your heart. And sometimes, the person you're trying to lose ends up being the one you can't imagine living without.

So, dear readers, this isn't the article I set out to write. It's not about foolproof ways to make a guy dump you. Instead, it's a story about how, in the process of trying to push someone away, I found myself falling in love. It's messy, it's unexpected, and it's beautiful.

Life has a funny way of turning our plans upside down. And sometimes, the best stories are the ones we never meant to write.

He closes the magazine, his mind spinning with thoughts of you. He knows he needs to find you, to talk to you, to tell you how he feels. He can't let this opportunity slip away, can't let the chance to be with you slip through his fingers.

With a sense of determination, Heeseung rises from his seat, his heart pounding in his chest. He knows he has to find you, to tell you how he feels, to see if maybe, just maybe, you feel the same way too.

HEESEUNG'S HEART RACES AS HE RUSHES THROUGH THE STREETS, his mind consumed with thoughts of you. He knows he needs to find you, to talk to you, to tell you everything.

As he rounds the corner, he sees your apartment building looming ahead. His steps quicken, his breath coming in short, ragged gasps. He's so close now, so close to finally telling you how he feels.

But as he reaches your building, his heart sinks at the sight before him. He sees movers loading boxes into a truck parked outside, and he realizes with a sinking feeling that you're moving away.

Heeseung's chest tightens with panic, his mind racing as he searches for a solution. He can't let you slip away, can't let this chance to be with you slip through his fingers. He rushes toward the building, his thoughts jumbled all up. 

As he bursts through the door, he sees you standing in the hallway, a suitcase at your feet, tears streaming down your face. His heart breaks at the sight of your sadness, and he knows he needs to act fast.

"Y/N!" he calls out, his voice echoing through the empty hallway. You turn to face him, your eyes widening in surprise at the sight of him standing there.

"Heeseung?" you whisper, your voice trembling with emotion. "What are you doing here?"

Heeseung takes a deep breath, steeling himself for what he's about to say. "I need to talk to you," he says, his voice filled with urgency. "There's something I need to tell you, something I should have told you a long time ago."

He steps closer to you, his eyes never leaving yours. "I was part of the bet," he admits, his voice barely above a whisper. "But it was never about winning a thousand dollars or proving anything to Jake. It was about proving something to myself—to prove that I could be the kind of guy who deserves someone like you."

Tears well up in your eyes as you listen to his confession, your heart aching with a mix of sadness and hope. "Heeseung…" you whisper, reaching out to touch his hand.

But Heeseung doesn't wait for you to say anything more. With a surge of courage, he leans in and presses his lips to yours, pouring all of his love and longing into the kiss. 

As Heeseung's lips meet yours in that soft, tender kiss, his hands gently find their way to your waist, pulling you closer to him.

You feel the heat of his body against yours, the closeness intensifying the sensation of his lips moving against yours. His touch is gentle yet possessive, his fingers tracing patterns on your skin as if memorizing every curve of your body.

You pull away, staring and laughing for a moment. 

"I love you," you whisper softly. 

"I love you more," he smiles back, quietly leaning his forehead against yours to quickly catch his lips on yours again. Maybe writing that article wasn't so bad after all.

#𐙚 nini works #੭୧ — like the movies 🎞️ #k-labels #enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #heeseung imagines #lee heeseung #sunghoon #engene #heeseung #jay enhypen #enhypen heeseung #heeseung fluff #lee heeseung imagines #lee heeseung x reader #sim jake #heeseung enhypen #heeseung scenarios #yang jungwon #jake enhypen #enha fluff #enha #enhypen jake #enha sunoo #enha imagines #enha x reader

[underestimated-heroine]

The fact that radfems spread this post around is actually really interesting--infuriating, but interesting. Because what they've really done here is tell on themselves.

This is the shrimp guy story:

From an anonymous green text called "shrimp saved my life" [emphasis mine]:

>be depressed, suicidal xanax- addicted incel >one day I go to my /aq/fag uncle's house for some shit >he has pet shrimp, never seen anything like it before >he offers to get me some 53 KB JPG >throw them in a barely cycled tank with some shitty rock >several shrimp die >realize that I killed them with my apathy >realize I need to take responsibility for once in my life >do research, learn about water parameters and so on >eventually I have a beautiful planted tank with no more deaths >notice a female shrimp carrying eggs >haven't felt this excited about anything in almost a decade >the eggs disappear and I once again think I fucked up >a few days later I see a tiny transparent baby shrimp >l suddenly know how the shepherds felt as they gazed upon the newborn Christ >by this point I live and breathe shrimp >all my spare time is spent on shrimp research and watching shrimp videos >l spend most of the money I had saved from my last job on shrimp products >quit the Xanax to support shrimp spending >start putting effort into college in hope of getting a good job for my shrimp >grades improve, no longer facing the prospect of dropping out >relationship with parents improves since I am finally passionate about something and applying myself >l see genuine happiness in their eyes when I talk excitedly about my shrimp >for my birthday my mom makes me a shrimp cake >it even has fondant legs and little chocolate eggs >cry like a little bitch when I see it >mom hugs me and tells me she's always been proud of me >college dorm neighbours demand to see my shrimp >shit they're gonna think I'm autistic >they actually think my shrimp are really cool >they start inviting me to their social events >start interacting with girls, get told by girls for the first time in my life that I'm fun and smart >l think my shrimp would be proud of me if they knew >We're gonna make it bros. Even if you can't do it for yourself, do it for the animals that depend on you.

He did address his relationship with women. By finding a hobby and passion and working on himself--"touching grass"--he stepped away from the echo chamber that filled him with all this rage and convinced him women were to blame for all of his problems. As someone once wisely observed, "the cure is going offline and realizing it's just. really not that big a deal."

And that is what radfems have not done, so of course they didn't spot the quiet flashpoint of shrimp guy's personal development within his story.

Edit: it's been brought to my attention that the version of the greentext post I lifted the text from was censored by someone else. My bad for not realizing that, tbh it was done so well I thought shrimp guy had done it himself, but that's an important part of the post. I've gone back through and un-censored it. The reply which was spread around with the original post addressed the words themselves well, I think; however distasteful and fucked up the incel rabbit hole is, it doesn't diminish his growth.

#posts i actually wrote #cw radical feminism #cw transphobia #incels

[zchl]

⌦ PRETTY BOY ✿﹐ #P.JS 🎀

pairing ﹒park jisung x fem read genre ﹒fluff , established relationship , cutesy things warnings ﹒jisung’s a tad insecure

⊹ when jisung gets sad over his acne and you catch him trying to figure out your skincare products.

✶ 1O:2Opm ▹﹒🎧

you enter the dorm you and your boyfriend shared. you’ve just gotten done with your exams, feeling tired and in need of your boyfriends presence you called out for him, “ji baby, where are you?” he would usually be sitting in the living room waiting for you by this time, or maybe sleeping since it was late. while looking around you hear a loud thud from the bathroom and what sounds like a squeal. you quickly make your way over to jisung’s bathroom. you try to open the door but to your surprise it’s locked.

“jisung? are you in here?” you knocked lightly on the door, you hear rustling come from inside before he responds quietly, “yeah i am..” you frown slightly wondering why he’s locking himself up in the bathroom. “why’s the door locked? can you open up, pleasee?” still holding onto the door knob. “uh,,,no! no. not yet! let me finish..” you raise an eyebrow in confusion. you could basically hear the sad look on his face. “jisung baby, let me in please.” you plead once more. it takes a few more pleases for you to hear the door unlock from the inside.

you open up the door slowly to reveal your tall boyfriend sitting on the toilet with your moisturizer pads sitting on his face. your serums, toners and lotions sitting on the counter. you look back at him, your face softening once you see why he wanted you out. “don’t laugh.” he pouts, his face flushed a soft pink. you can’t help but smile at him as you crouch in front of him.

“it’s not funny!” the whines leaving his mouth were making you feel even more giggly. “ji baby, i’m not making fun of you.” you grin, placing your hands on his knees. “wanna tell me what you’re doing with my skincare?” he looks away from you, head tilted down. “not really, it’s embarrassing…” you get up and go to check the products he was using. you chuckle to yourself when you see the mixture of different skincare products. “jisung, you know if you wanted to play with my stuff you could’ve just asked.”

he quickly shakes his head, “i’m not, playing with your stuff i’m just..experimenting.” he deeply sighs taking off the pads from his face and rubbing the moisture off his skin with the back of his hand. “i just thought that if i could find something that would get rid of my acne…i would be prettier for you.” your eyes widen, lips forming into a frown. “baby what do you mean, prettier for me?..” your heart hurts for him, you truly hoped he didn’t think you found him unattractive because of his acne.

you grab his hands as you hover over his seated body, “jijj, you’re soso pretty to me.” you reassure him rubbing small circles on his hand. “your acne doesn’t make me think that you’re less pretty than i always have.” you lift one hand to his cheek, rubbing his skin softly. “your skin is perfect, imperfections and all. i’ll always think you’re pretty.”

jisung’s eyes light up hearing your words, his mood changes instantly from one of sadness to happiness. “you mean it?..you’re not teasing me right?” he asks, grabbing your hand in his big cold hands, pressing it against his cheek more. “i mean it ji, i’d never lie to you about something like this.” you smile, “now get up, i’ll do your skincare if you’d like…but with the proper products.” you remark teasingly. he rolls his eyes in response but widely smiles afterwords getting up and holding your hands. you gather your skincare products that you think would fit his skin. while doing so you hear him mumble something under his breath,

“yn..”

“huh? what is it ji?”

“you think i’m pretty?”

your words had finally came to sense in his mind, the smile plastered across his face was something you wish you saw more on him.

“yes jisung, i think you are so pretty.

my pretty boy.”

written by @zchl on tumblr! give credits if reposting to other platforms. :)

#zchl #nct dream soft hours #nct dream fanfic req #nct dream fanfic #nct dream fic #nct dream fluff #nct dream imagines #nct dream drabbles #nct dream scenarios #nct dream #nct drabbles #nct fluff #nct x reader #nct imagines #park jisung #jisung fluff #jisung x reader #jisung imagines #jisung soft hours #nct dream gifs #park jisung gifs

[non-stop-imagines]

Mírame

From this request!💖 And a little help from this too 😚

Word Count: ~10.1k words w/ smau

Pairing: Carlos Sainz Jr. x Black Rapper!Reader ( JT face claim)

Warning: Smut, p in v, fingering, forced eye contact, a little bit of an innocence kink made its way in there, Twitter Environment, rude comments, mention of food Minors DNI!!! 18+

A/N: AH HA! ITS DONE AND IM SO HAPPY! I have said this so many times and I mean it everytime, thank you, thank you, thank you so much to my 🌶️ anon. For trusting me with this request, for checking in on me, and most of all for being so patient. I hope you are doing well and I hope you enjoy this. 💖 I hope you all enjoy this. I am trying to work my way to reopening my requests because I truly find pure joy in reading the ideas that you guys have. Love you all!!💖💛💖💛💖

A/N 2: All of the pictures used for the smau portions are all from pinterest and are not my own product.

Masterlist

___________

   You and Carlos stroll back over to his car, parked a block away from the park that Carlos took you to, Jardins Saint-Martin, just on the outskirts of Monaco. Since Carlos decided to ask you on this date at the last minute (it was about 11:00pm on Saturday, Monaco grand prix weekend), it was either this or his boat that probably was surrounded by fans in some fashion. Taking you to this park, and finding a place still open to buy ice cream before coming here, was Carlos' best shot at being alone with you.

   "Sorry the date seemed so…basic. I wish I could've taken you somewhere fancier, but I was so nervous about asking you on a date that I didn't do it until late." He's been wanting to do this since he met you at the Miami Grand Prix. When he first saw you peeking into the Ferrari garage as a celebrity guest at the race, he had never plotted so quickly to get someone's number. You were…different. In a good way. You were dressed sexy yet classy, obviously comfortable in your own skin, and you weren't afraid to be expressive when talking with anyone. Heck, when you first talked to him, he could tell you were nervous, but it still did little to dull the fire in your conversation.

   "So, this is yours, huh?" Carlos had led you into the open garage while everyone else focused on a different celebrity that had made their way over.

   "Sí. Not what you expected, huh?" He smiles and watches you closely observe the race car, your eyes tracing its curves while Carlos' traced yours.

   "To be honest, I don't know what I expected. I mean it tried to learn as much as I could about the sport once I learned I was invited, but I didn't really focus on the cars. Mainly teams, drivers, less technical stuff." You were rambling. You knew you were rambling, it always happened when you were around someone you found attractive. "But I do know that this does not look like any Ferrari I've seen." Mental facepalm. Of course not, it's a goddamn race car. You could feel your chest squeezing, scared that your awkward remark wouldn't elicit a response from the driver, but instead the faint sound of an exhaled chuckle shocks you.

   "I know. It's smaller. And seems a bit less safe, but what do I know?" Your tension melts a bit as Carlos makes a joke just as terrible as yours. You continue observing the car, walking around and tilting your head, hair falling gently around your face.

   "Sorry, I'm being so quiet. I just think it's so cool seeing one of these up close." You saunter back over to Carlos, eyes still on the car, not to observe it, but for the purpose of avoiding the intense eye contact that he was trying to initiate, mentally urging you to look at him.

   "So, uh, you make music, no?" This gets you looking at him for a moment, only to answer the vague question.

   "Uh, yeah. I'm a rapper. You probably haven't listened to my stuff, though. Probably not your speed." You flash a small smile then look away again, observing the car one last time before turning your attention to the rest of the garage. Little did you know, that smile knocked Carlos off his feet, and he wanted it to happen again.

   "Maybe I have, maybe I haven't, but I would like to. Here." This brought your attention to his face then his phone that was unlocked and open for you to go to your music. "You can just add yourself."

   "You know you could've done this yourself…" You smile to yourself as you search your name.

   "I know, but now you can put your number in, too." You stopped what you were doing to look up at him, squinting and grinning.

   "Ah, smooth. I see where the nickname comes from." You chuckle and go to do as told, adding your number to his contacts.

   "Thank you. I'm glad you said it because if I said it, it would have been too cheesy." He exhales a laugh, searching your face for amusement, which he finds once you go to hand his phone back.

  "You know, I would've given you my number if you just asked." You didn't know what to do with your hands. If you were bold, you would have allowed your hand to run along his toned arm, but you settled on just letting your hands be expressive as you spoke, lazily pointing an acrylic clad finger.

   "Maybe, but this is more fun." Carlos smiled, a smile that accentuated his bottom lip, making you instinctively and stealthily dart your tongue out onto yours.

   After the brief moment of the poorest example of attraction projecting body language imaginable, it was soon time for you to continue on to God knows where because you weren't paying attention before, and for Carlos to start Friday practice prep, even though he definitely wouldn't be paying attention. He would be thinking about how he was going to text you, call you, something.

   It took him 3 days to text "Hi" and you 5 seconds to respond 

   Okay, so fire was an exaggeration, but you didn't know any better.

   "I thought the date was nice!" You hesitantly reach out for his hand. The motion was initially instinctive, your hand acting on its own, and once you realized what you were doing, you began to pull back, but it was stopped and encased by Carlos' before it was fully retracted, and he continued the conversation like nothing happened.

   "No, no. It could have been nicer. I just didn't give myself enough time." Your heart was racing, and this was when you realized you were still looking at entwined hands and not the man speaking to you, so you quickly refocused yourself.

   "Really, I wouldn't know the difference anyway, I have nothing to compare it to." Carlos tilts his head quizzically at your implication so you continue to explain, chuckling. "I've never been on a date before." 

   "Wait, no? Haven't you had a boyfriend or something?" His thumb starts to move over your fingers and your brain short circuits, your eyes cutting back to your hand.

   "Uh, no. No, I haven't. So I definitely don't know what I'm doing and I wouldn't know better as to whether or not this was the worst date a person could've ever had." You finally got your brain to work again and smiled nervously as you spoke, watching a look of disdain settle into Carlos' face.

   "Well, I wouldn't say all of that, but…wow, I can not believe you've never had a boyfriend." You were greatly enjoying Carlos' shock, but you go on to explain a little.

   "I've been focusing on my music career since I was 16, so someone would literally have had to hold a sign up in my face and shout that they like me for me to even consider the possibility of them wanting to go on a date with me." You giggle nervously, the disdain on his face shifting to curiosity as his eyes traced every part of your face over and over again.

    "So would that be necessary now?" A grin tugs at the right side of his mouth and it seems like he keeps having to pull his eyes from your lips.

   "No, that won't be necessary. Just a simple 'I like you' would be fine." Your laugh was looser this time, and you finally let loose a full smile, displaying shallow dimples and accentuating your lips. Carlos looked at you like a shooting star that had just whizzed by, disappearing into the horizon all mysterious and sparkly.

    "Well, I like you, a lot. And I want to take you on more dates, and be whatever other first I can be for you." His grin slowly fades but it doesn't take away the sincerity in his eyes and his words, now unabashedly staring at your lips. 

   "Oh. Well i- I've, um, never, uh, kissed anyone before." There was obvious hesitation in your statement, knowing it was a bold move for you, slightly surprised at the smile that landed on Carlos' lips.

   "I am so glad you said that." You knew what was coming, especially once you felt him pull you closer with your hand, beginning to lean in, but for some reason you failed to take any steps to reciprocate the action, eyes wide open, watching him lean in for the kiss but stop centimeters away. "It's better if you close your eyes, I promise." Carlos chuckles at the shocked face you looked at him with, his eyes still trained on your plump parted lips.

   "Yeah, I know. I don't know why I didn't…let's-uh-try again." You pinched the bridge of your nose in embarrassment, resetting your brain to try the moment again. Eventually you gaze back up at him, first taking a moment to admire the man in front of you, failing at hiding a laughing grin while you got lost in his eyes.

   Carlos, on the other hand, his mind was going berserk. The eyes you looked at him with were so innocent and trusting, even further indicated by how you, unprompted, fluttered your eyes closed prepared to try your first over kiss again. He had to indulge his own self for a moment, testing the waters to see if he could prove his theory, even the slightest bit, so he unnecessarily lifts your chin and tilts your head to your right, each move smooth and gentle, and with both moves you allowed yourself to follow the modification unhesitatingly, keeping your eyes closed. "Perfect." He finally leans down to kiss you, first just the soft press of each other's lips, you getting used to the foreign, intimate feeling, but after that moment Carlos slots his lips between yours and you try your best to keep up, mimicking his lip movements to the best of your ability. Carlos was considerate of the situation though and held off on the tongue, instead opting for manually lifting and wrapping your arms around his neck and then circling his own around your waist to make the kiss deeper. Your lips were glossy and pupils were dilated upon pulling away from the kiss, chest heaving with slow deep inhales.

   "How was that?" The look you gave him seeked approval, or at least constructive criticism, on your kissing ability. Carlos just like that his opinion mattered so much to you.

   "I feel like I should be asking you that, no?" He keeps a tight grip on you with one hand as he uses the other to gently rake through your hair, fingers going just deep enough to manipulate the top layer.

   "Oh, well you've done this before. I'm the one that needs pointers." You move your arms to wrap them around Carlos' torso, giving your shoulders a rest 

   "You need no pointers." He leans down to give you another lip slotted kiss.

   "Oh, thank you. I-uh- you're not too bad yourself." Carlos just chuckles at your awkward comment and leans in for more kisses, testing the waters more and more to see how deep he could make them, how much more tongue you would allow, and smiling at how you didn't know what to do with the small introduction to the appendage. It was you who had to break up the moment, wedging your arms between you two. "Don't you have a curfew or something? The race is tomorrow right?"

   Carlos wasn't going to lie, he completely forgot it was a race weekend. He was so enamored by you just being here, how when you were with him you exuded a, now more understood, innocence that is hidden behind the nature of your fame. "Not if I pretend I don't." He shines a devious grin at you, and you have to reboot your brain to remember what you were going to say.

   “No, I’m not gonna be the reason you break curfew or whatever.” You try and wave away his eyes that were trained on your face, but his lips approaching your neck, and the reflexive tilt of your head to give him more surface area, shut you right up.

   “Fine, I guess you’re right." He says with his lips brushing deliciously against your ear, then pulls his face away and extends his arm past its previous home if your waist to open the car door for you. He has to move his face into your line of sight, which was off in the distance just past his left shoulder as you contemplated your situation, and use his eyes to motion you into the car.

   "Thank you again, for tonight. I had a nice time." You spoke as you buckled your seatbelt, realizing that was something you did often when you were able to, occupying yourself with something else to avoid having to look Carlos in the eye. He wasn't going to stand for that though, so once he was in and the car was started, he turned his body to you and tilted your chin up so you would look at him.

   "That's good to hear." He brings you forward for a kiss, again testing your response to the addition of his tongue to the equation, liking the effort that you put into following his lead. He didn't worry, though. He knew he had time with you. "When you get to the paddock tomorrow, go to the Ferrari building. I'll make sure they have a garage pass for you." You just nod, eyes dazed and trained on his lips before flicking up to his own deep brown irises, and he couldn't help leaning in for another brief make out session. After kissing you the first time, your first time, he became immediately obsessed with it, trying to teach you and get you to follow his lead each time, and loving that you were a fast learner. 

   After some driving, more kissing, and stealthily making it back to the hotel room, "Good nights" and confirmation for tomorrow's plans were made and, eventually (because Carlos wouldn't leave unless you looked at him while talking to him) you both were in your assigned rooms, wondering what would come of that night.

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yn_music Red on me like Ferrari 💋🌶️🏎️

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user1 New music soon? 👀♥️

>yn_music We workin, don't you worry boo💋

>user1 I literally screamed and threw my phone

>yn_music Hope your phone's okay 😬

normani It's giving 90s dream girl 📷♥️

>yn_music 💋

user2 Uhhhh, Carlos, whatchu doin here blud?

>user3 Apparently they seemed pretty close during the Miami GP

>user2 She was at the Miami GP!?!?

>user3 Yeah! And there were seen in the garage Thursday talking and possibly exchanging numbers 😶

>user2 This is the best possible wag announcement I've ever experienced

user4 I refuse to believe that Carlos Sainz is seeing someone that makes music like hers 🤷🏽‍♀️

>user2 why are you even here

   "I'm sorry. Can you just explain to me one more time why you stopped me?" You let your fingers just barely run through the top of your hair, taking a deep breath and glaring at the man standing in front of you.

   "We have received a couple of complaints regarding your attire and so we have to ask you to cover up." The man in the bright yellow security jacket looked just as done as you did, but you didn't care.

   "Okay, I'm not trying to be difficult or anything, but I have seen outfits much worse than mine and yet I'm the one that gets stopped? I just don't…" Your response may have been directed to the security guard, but it was more for your own sanity trying to keep yourself calm. "Respirar" You repeat the Spanish word taught to you by Carlos for whenever you felt anxious or overwhelmed, inhaling as you say it and then releasing a long exhale. "Let me just-Do you think we could go over to the Ferrari motorhome? Carlos was the one who invited me and maybe he would be able to help…”

   “Ma’am, please. We don’t need to get anyone else involved. Just cover up or else I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” The guy reaches out to guide you by your arm but you pull back from his reach, taking a singular step back.

   "First of all, do not touch me. I did not give you permission to touch me. Secondly, I am not going to cover up because there is nothing wrong with my outfit, and it is entirely too hot to do so. Please can we just-I texted him, hopefully he's by-oh!" You felt a hand touch your lower back ever so lightly, making you jump and a flash of anger come over you very briefly before looking to your right and seeing Carlos flash a grin at you. The more severe part of your frustration melted away with the presence of the man beside you, softening your demeanor and allowing him to press a kiss to the top of your head and subsequently fix any bit of hair that came out of place due to the action.

   “Hello.” He still had that grin on, but you could tell it got brighter the longer he looked at you, the more his eyes wandered around your appearance.

   “Hi.” All you could muster was a tired grin to reciprocate, drained from the previous encounter, which made Carlos even more adamant to squash whatever problem you frenziedly and vaguely texted him about. So, after protectively wrapping his arm around your waist, he turns to the man that was previously hounding you about your outfit.

   “So, what’s the problem?” The glare Carlos gave the man could have set the guy’s hair on fire if Carlos willed it. He was messing with his girl, and he wasn’t going to stand for it.

   “Oh, s-she is a guest of yours…” The man started fidgeting with his jacket, pulling at the bottom hem and scrunching up the sleeves before finally just settling on crossing his arms. 

   “Yes. My girlfriend if you want to be specific. So, what is the problem you are having with my girlfriend?” Silence. That is all that followed the question, and it caused the world to just fade away, leaving just you three. Carlos, silent and waiting for an answer. The man, silent and feeling like an ass as he racked his brain for a way to talk himself out of the situation. You , silent and waiting for something to unfold, and then finally registering Carlos’ words but too nervous to say anything. When enough time passed to irritate him, Carlos turned to you for an answer. “What happened?”

   “Um, uh..” Your first instinct was to look away, anything for you to not have to endure the intenseness of Carlos’ frustrated stare. You click your long, decorated nails together, trying to find your words again, surprised by the gentle finger that guides your eyes to his.

   “Mírame. You can tell me.” His glare softened when he turned to you, willing you with his eyes to speak and trying to telepathically convey that it was a safe space to tell him the full story.

   “He told me that there have been people complaining about my outfit and that I can either cover up or leave.” Even though it was hard to initiate eye contact with Carlos, maintaining it was a piece of cake. Getting lost in the dark irises of a gaze that could go from playfully wide to sultry squint was effortless for you, and you eyes seemed to follow the motion of his as he checked out your entire outfit, oversized and low buttoned white dress shirt and blue jean mini skirt down to the gold accented thigh high boots, a sexy elegant look which was one of the many looks he loved to see on you, and definitely did not see a problem with.

   “You must not have been doing this for long because I have seen much worse outfits walking through the paddock.” His hand slid from your waist to your hand as he mildly pointed a finger at the man before turning to you. “You look great today, by the way.” Since a true response would make you dip into having to initiate eye contact again, all you could do was bashfully grin at the ground. “Now, we have somewhere to be, and I think you should go take a break, and just not come back, so you don’t disturb anyone else, okay?” He checks to ensure he had a firm grip on your hand before hastily walking away toward the Ferrari motorhome, but when you guys get close instead of going to the building you two turn toward the garage entrance, stopping along the wall just as you turn down the long walkway. It was only at that moment that you realized Carlos was dressed in his race attire, only haphazardly with the suit pulled up onto his shoulders but mostly unzipped, and your eyes couldn’t help but follow his hands as the quickly performed that task. “That was stupid, I don’t know why…” He mumbled that to himself as he finished strapping himself into his race suit. “I’m sorry about that girlfriend thing. I-”

   “Don't be sorry.” You answered quickly and made sure your eyes met his. When Carlos said that in his haste to defend you, sure you heard an inflected emphasis on the word "girlfriend", that was a pleasant pillow that you were able to rest on while he handled the situation.

   “What, you want to be my girlfriend?” His smirk acted as your reminder that you were holding eye contact, making you want to shrink back down in embarrassment, but you didn’t allow yourself to, and you knew Carlos wouldn’t allow it either.

   “If you don’t mind being my first boyfriend.” You shrug timidly, and smile just as wide as Carlos does after your answer. You could tell Carlos was racking his brain for his next steps with how quick his eyes flashed over you, finally landing on your lips as his hand rested on your shoulders to pull you in for a kiss, quick but still held the happiness he wanted to convey.

   “I told you I want to be all of your firsts. Even though I wanted this to be a bit more special. Flowers and everything.” He pushes your hair behind your ear and finds his eyes moving back and forth between yours again.

   “Yeah, I remember.” Your eyes reluctantly peeled themselves away from his and traveled down to his race suit, pulling you back to the present as your hands act on their own to turn him toward his garage. “Go, please I’ve held you up long enough. What is this anyway? Practice?” Since landing in Britain that morning, you have been non-stop trying to get to the track, so you haven’t kept track of the schedule for the day.

   “Eh, no. Qualifying.” This only made your eyes widen and caused you to put more force into pushing him into the garage.

   “What the fuck!? You could’ve told me! Go, go, I probably completely ruined your concentration.” You continue to push but the action is interrupted by Carlos delicately pulling you around to his front and pulling you close to him wrapping your arms around his waist. His hands found their home on the sides of your shoulders, steadying you for another kiss, meant to calm your worries but also because he found your concern endearing.

   "I'm more than prepared. Trust me. I'll see you later, cariño." He jogs off to his side of the garage, having to leave you at the entrance, but you eventually make your way in, standing behind the barrier separating the guests from the rest of the garage, pulling on headphones and waving at his cousin before finally turning your attention to the main event.

__________

   "Okay, hold on one more moment, cariño. Keep your eyes closed.” You’re walked out of the bathroom that you were very quickly whisked into when you arrived at Carlos' room. Though your eyes were closed, they could still sense the soft glow of what could possibly be candle light, and the lack of sight didn't stop your nose from breathing in the fresh perfume of flowers, though you were unsure what kind. You waited patiently, jumping ever so slightly at the feeling of Carlos' hands over your closed eyes and the faint touch of his breath on the back of your neck. "Alright, open."

   You open your eyes to, as you suspected, the dim, warm lights of several candles around his hotel room, a bouquet of roses on the bed that was sprinkled with rose petals. "Oh, Carlos…" You could've cried. Just a few months ago, you weren't even thinking about being in a relationship, let alone being in one with someone like Carlos, but here you are, with this man who thinks the world of you, and shows it not only in his words but in his actions. 

   "I wanted to get more balloons, but this is what I could get in such short notice." He had his arms wrapped around your torso and his chin rested on your shoulder as you looked at the beautifully decorated room, but you wanted to look at him instead, so you turned around in his arms to hook yours around his neck.

   "You're too much." You slowly lean in for a peck, smiling with each one that follows.

   "I know." You both chuckle as you go to playfully hit his chest. "You deserve this all, I hope you know that."

   "I'm trying too, but still, thank you, Carlos." You go to rest your head on his chest, but you're startled by a sudden exclamation of mild disdain from him.

   "Aye, Carlos is too formal." You eyebrows furrow briefly at him and shift your jaw as you think.

   "Okay, so, um, what then?" Your eyes were wide and surprisingly innocent compared to the usual sultry look you had.

   "Papí. I think that would have a nice ring coming from you." He couldn't help but lean in for another kiss from you. Your lips were his favorite part of you and the feeling of them on his own was his favorite feeling in the world, you embracing him second for the time being.

   "Okay. Thank you, Papí." You place another peck in his waiting lips, liking how the nickname rolled off your tongue.

   "You deserve it, mí amor." A kiss to your cheek begins to trail down your neck, reaching a tender spot that elicits a moan that shocks you but pleases him.

   "Oh. I don't know wh-" Your automatic apology was interrupted and excited Carlos.

   "Let's see if we can do that again." The kisses continued, making it the first time anyone has ever explored the erogenous points on your body. 

   Well, he was at least able to get around to anything above the shoulders.

yn_music

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yn_music 🌹🥀🌹🥀

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carlossainz55 Amor ♥️

user5 This is the hardest soft launch I've ever seen

user6 My happiness depends on these two making it so just everyone be quiet and let them live

>landonorris I agree with them ☝🏼

kaliuchis Mamí ‼️‼️‼️🥵🥵🥵

user7 I'm gonna need pointers because I still don't know how you snatched Carlos Sainz 🧐

>yn_music Be awkward as fuck in the Ferrari garage 🧍🏿‍♀️

user8 This is not gonna last I'm calling it rn 🫥

>user9 She probably whined and cried for him to do that for her 🙄

>carlossainz55 Try again. This time pull your head out of your ass so you can think clearer

   You were in the zone, posing as music played in the studio. That was truly the only way you could even begin this shoot as the only things covering your upper body were fake butterflies, but as you got well into the shoot those nerves melted away and you were just vibing to the music. After a couple more shots, the photographer called you over to take a look at what they had gotten and while you were studying each shot you received a tap on the shoulder.

   "Papí!" You turn around and fling your arms around your boyfriend’s neck, his warm woodsy scent, a slightly sweet tinge at the end, swirling around your head. When you pull away, he hands you the robe that you left in the make-up area, aware of the qualm you had about being too exposed for long periods of time, and you graciously and quickly accept it before hanging your arms around his neck again while he brings you closer to him by your hips.

   “Te ves hermosa, cariño. That color is perfect on you.” You looked at him with a dopey gaze, poking out your lips to accept the kiss he was leaning in for.

   “Gracias, Papi.” You guys make your way toward the make up area, which in a large open area such as the studio this was taking place, is a small portion of the large room partitioned off, a clothing rack and a vanity in the vicinity. "What are you doing here?" You sit in the chair facing the vanity, your hand in the unwavering grasp of your boyfriend who walks around to stand in front of you.

   "What, I can't come see my girlfriend?" His eyes wandered around your intricate makeup, while he spoke and you could feel your face heat up and your heart begin to race as he placed you under his adoring gaze.

   "Well, I mean, it's just unexpected for you to be in L.A. when you're supposed to be in Singapore by tomorrow. Wouldn't this fuck up your sleep schedule?" You bring your other hand up to accompany the one already in Carlos' grasp, swinging his arm, eventually turning your attention to the group of hands.

   "Eh, maybe. Maybe not. I guess we will see." He shrugs and then uses his free hand to tilt your head up. "I couldn't pass on a chance to see mi cariño."

   "Oh." He removes his finger and your eyes go back to your guys' hands, to his dismay. But his ears perked when you voluntarily looked back up at him. "I am really happy to see you.”

   It was simple what you said, but it was how you said it that made the moment a sticky-sweet one. “I’m happy to see you too, amor.” He bent in to press a kiss to your lips and then examined your eyes. “Have you eaten? Are you hungry?”

   “Oh, no. I’m fine. They provided food." You tilt your head to the table off to the side, and Carlos' eyes are assaulted with the sight of boring looking sandwiches and various fruits and vegetables. He knew you well enough to know that you would only eat what was over there if you had to. But he was there, so you didn't have to.

   "Are you sure you don't want me to get you something, mí corazon?" Corazon. The nickname that you loved and feared the most for the sheer fact it is a sign that you had to be vulnerable. If he called you by that, it meant that he could see through whatever front you were putting up and that you had no choice but to voice whatever was on your mind. A complaint, your feelings on something, an idea you have. He was there to listen, and you were trying to remember that.

   "Well, um, there is this taco place, I think it’s about a block away, they have these amazing carne asada fries with queso, guacamole, pico, sour cream…” Your stomach growls at your descriptive request, and you look up innocently at your boyfriend, who grinned at you like you were a precious jewel.

   “Got it. I think I saw it on my way here. Uh, what about coffee? You seem a little tired.” He reaches to your hair, a feather light touch barley even altering the already perfectly set hair.

   “No, I-uh…” You stop your refusal, feeling Carlos’ intense gaze on you, just waiting for you to lie so he could say something, so you conceded and told him the truth. "Yes, a coffee would be nice." You give him a worn grin and lean into the forehead kiss that he gently guides you into by the back of your head.

   "Okay, mí amor. Iced Macchiato, extra espresso shot, sweet cream cold foam…do you want extra caramel this time?" You look up and slowly nod at him, leaning in for one last peck on the lips. "Okay, I'll be back. You keep being sexy." 

   "I'll try." This was preceded with a girlish giggle, and you were reluctant to let go of his hand, holding on until his arm was extended to its fullest extent. "Love you." 

   Carlos stops in his tracks. Sure, this wasn't the first "love you" shared between you too, but he was sure this was the first time you've said it first. "I love you too, mí cariño." He backtracks to kiss you again, soft and slow, before you finally let him leave.

   He came back with the food and coffee about 30 minutes later and stayed for the entire rest of the shoot, his presence a comfort you didn't know you needed until he was there. He left for the race early the next morning, even though he knew he would be arriving halfway through the media day, it was worth being with you those extra few hours.

yn_music

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yn_music Look who decided to visit 🦋😚

.

No Bars out now, y'all‼️ If you haven't listened, where tf y'all been at? 🤨😒😘

tagged carlossainz55

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carlossainz55 Sexy as always 🥵 Pre-race weekend time well spent cariño ♥️😘

>landonorris Why do I feel like there is some deeper meaning behind this 🤨

>yn_music Don't look to deep into it, it's not for young eyes 👶🏼

>landonorris You're literally a year older than me???

saweetie Y'all don't fuck wit her 🤞🏿💖🤞🏿💖

>yn_music ♥️

>saweetie I've got a shoot next week, you think your man can come bring me some food?

>carlossainz55 She has told me that since you and are her friends I am obligated to. Just tell me when and where 🫡

user10 A lewk❗ Ate left no crumbs❗ Slay hunty to the boots down❗Serving cunt❗

>yn_music You just using them all, huh? 😭

>user10 I just love you so much 🥲

>yn_music ♥️

user11 So we're praising her being basically nude...got it ✔️

>user10 You just wish you looked that good basically nude 💁🏾‍♀️

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carmenmmundt Can't wait to see you this weekend, lovely ☺️

>yn_music I say the moment I see you we flake on our boyfriends and go get some drinks

>carmenmmundt Deal 🤝

>user12 Hmmm? You two are besties and no one decided to tell us?? Surprises around each corner this season

   "Amor, can you grab the salad de la navera, por favor?" Reyes instructs as you two move around the kitchen to grab the finishing touches on the dinner that was happening out on the patio of the large Madrid home. It was only you two in the kitchen, as desired by Carlos' mom, while he, his sisters and various other family members stayed out on the patio while Carlos Sr. grilled.

   "Okay, here we are." You set the bowl on the counter and then turn to lean against it as you watch her put finishing touches on various other fragrant side dishes.

   "Gracias, amor." When she gets done turning off the burners of the stove and wiping her hands clean, she whirls around to look at you, a soft content grin on her face as she eyed you up and down, meeting your eyes when she's done. "You are such a lovely girl. And not just beautiful, pero tu aura, how comfortable you are with yourself and how it naturally makes other people more comfortable around you. That's a gift."

   "Thank you, Miss Reyes. You don't understand how nice that is to hear. With so many people talking about my relationship with Carlos, thinking they know what's going on…it's just nice to hear. Especially from you." Your heart fluttered at the compliment. You weren't one to be phased by online comments, but there was a small morsel of your mind that was worried the comments would influence those close to Carlos, convince them that you weren't good for him, but that has been far from the case. They all loved you, and that was an understatement. His mom and sisters would always steal you away from him the moment you guys walked through the door, and his father treated you like his own.

   "And Carlito, he-I have never seen him so in love with someone. When he calls me, two things he talks about, driving and you." You had to do something with your hands as you felt Reyes' adoring eyes focus hard on you, making you mildly nervous.

   “I’m sure my friends would say a similar thing about me. All I do is focus on my music and talk about Carlos.” You chuckle and bring your hand to your hair to shake it out and push some of it backwards. “I always feel like a lovesick teenager when I talk about him. I get giddy about the stupidest stuff.”

   “As you should, mi amor. He always talks about how proud he is of you. How you’ve allowed yourself to be vulnerable. How you've been learning to voice your needs. And, eh, this last one coming from my own hopes, but I hope he is showing you what a good relationship is supposed to be. Even if he is not your only one, I hope he is a good one.” She takes a step towards you and lays a soft hand on your cheek, and you naturally lean into the motherly touch, your lips twitching into a grin.

   “He’s been a great one. He’ll be a tough act to follow, if it comes to that of course.” You two share a quiet moment after that, like a mother watching her daughter fall blissfully in love and being comforted in the fact that she is being loved back two fold.

   “Bueno. Now, let’s talk about that new song of yours while we bring the rest of this food out.” She nods her head at the salad bowl and plate of rosquillas sitting on the island behind you and turns around to grab the dishes behind her and leads the way to the patio where the rest of the family was.

   “Oh, that. I-” You follow quickly behind her, preparing an answer to explain the content of the song but the answer you get before you’re able to finish is one that you should’ve expected.

   “I love it. It’s on my workout playlist.” She turns to the side to walk through the door to ensure that nothing hits the door frame, watching her step as she does so, and you follow her lead, dumbfounded by her confession. “You never need to worry about your music with me amor. I love everything you make because it’s you. You need to take some advice from your own song. Aye,¿cuál era la línea? Ah, ‘I’m that bitch, give a fuck who don’t like me.’” Reyes’ recitation of the lyric invites a playful, riot-like response, a jumble of "Mamí!" and "Tía!" erupting from the group on the patio.

   "Thank you, Miss Reyes. I'm very happy you enjoy the song." You say this through intermittent chuckles as you walk over to the other side of the table, to where you're greeted by your boyfriend trying to take the bowl of salad and plate of dessert from you because he never lets you do any labor if you don't have to, while a similar gesture unknowingly happened in the same moment with his mom and dad. The difference in the moment is, that while Reyes allowed the gesture to happen, used to Carlos Sr.’s impromptu help, you kept the serving dishes in your grasp, telling Carlos that you had it and giving him a short kiss on the way by.

   You two had an audience for that entire interaction, you walking by, Carlos' eyes watching you the entire, and the bright, eye crinkling smile he gave you once you turned to him after placing the dishes down, bringing you into his arms and giving you a deep kiss. He then plops into the chair he was previously sat in, bringing you down onto his lap, eliciting a giggle from you in the process. "So, what did you and my mom talk about in there?"

   "Oh you know, the usual. Food, music…how you're absolutely obsessed with me and can't live without me." You calmly comb your fingers through his hair as you spoke, slowly getting more focused on actually fixing the tousled look of his hair, until his right index finger tilts your head down slightly so you were looking in his eyes.

   "Todo es verdad, mí cariño." You lean down to receive the kiss his partially puckered lips offered, the only thing your brain could register doing is allowing your eyes to travel the hills of his face and lean your head into the light touch his fingers gave the back of your ear following his gentle modification of how your hair fell in front of your face. "Oh!" His sudden exclamation made you flinch slightly and perk you head toward him, eyes widened in surprise, silently waiting for him to continue. "Move your stuff into my room tonight, please. I do not know why you slept in a different room last night, anyway." His index finger continued to lightly scratch at the back of your ear.

   "Oh, yeah. I was so tired last night after traveling, and it was, like, instinct to go to another room at your parents house because that's what I did the last time we came here. But, um, I will. I did miss you last night." 

   "I missed you too. You have no idea how much I missed you." His eyes traipse around your body suggestively, before silently coaxing your eyes to his. Your head follows the guide of Carlos' hand to meet his lips in a couple of light, languid kisses, that is until you hear a low grunt and turn around to see his cousin playfully rolling his eyes at the precious interaction.

   "Consigue una habitación." This was whispered under Oñoro's breath, and a cheesy smile plastered its way onto his face when Carlos' hand briefly leaves your hip to swat at his cousin, a flurry of giggles coming from all parties.

   "Sólo estás celoso." His arm wraps back around your waist and hand gravitates back to your hip, clasping his other hand that has now settled in the same location, hugging your body closer to him.

   "No, he's just mad that I beat him at Padel last time we were here and I could probably beat his ass again." Carlos brings his head adding a curiously raised eyebrow to his amused visage. "He still doesn't understand how I did it with the long nails." You click your, now moderate length (moderate compared to the usual length you get), nails as a subconscious supplement to your coy answer, a complete contrast to the response that comes from the man seated next to you two.

   "You shouldn't have even been able to hold the racquet with those things." Though loud, the tone of his answer was more comical, a chuckle laced throughout his words.

   "Aye, don't be a sore loser." They childishly swat at each other for a couple of seconds before Carlos' attention abruptly moves back to you. "You move to my room tonight, bueno?"

   "Bueno, papí." You press a gentle kiss to his nose and then a few slow exaggerated ones to his lips. Nothing too deep, not in the company of family, only lips were involved, but there was a conscious effort on your part to put most of your attention on his bottom lip, sucking and kissing it.

   Soon it was time to eat and you had to move to your own chair, much to Carlos' dismay.

________

   Three slow knocks to his bedroom door made Carlos rise from his bed and slowly stalk over and swing it open, slowly pulling your tiresome frame into his arms.

   "You moved my stuff already." You mumble into his chest, the scent wafting from him swirling around you, making you realize exactly how much you missed him last night. How perfect he would have been to cuddle up next to, be wrapped in his warm embrace…

   "Cariño? You there?" He makes a knocking noise while pretending to knock your head to grab your attention. You didn't realize how tired you were.

   "Yeah, yeah. I, um…" Your response acted as go-ahead for Carlos to press slow kisses up your neck and behind your ear, a location that he would pepper with his lips when he wanted to mess with you, make you mewl quietly and immerse yourself fully in the sensation. He loved it, watching your face show a level of eros that would rarely reveal itself. He always wanted more, wanted to move further down your body, explore areas that are always tortuously covered in clothes, but he was adamant in not doing so until you were absolutely sure. Until you yourself initiated something.

   "You must be so tired, amor. Can't think straight." He pushes his hands beneath the baggy long sleeve you wore, fingernails grazing the skin of your back, one hand leaving its post for a fleeting moment to push closed the bedroom door, your lips held captive by his.

   "Mmm…no. No. I, uh, I just gotta go do something real quick. I'll be back." It took a moment for you to escape Carlos' hold, you practically wearing him like a backpack until you disappeared behind the bathroom door. He slowly saunters over to the bed, stopping momentarily when he hears you screech out "You even organized my stuff in the bathroom!" 

   After about 15 minutes, you emerged from the bathroom and laggardly made your way toward the bed, where Carlos was engrossed with something on his phone. That is, until he could see you approaching him in his peripheral, making him intuitively set the device down and accept you crawling into bed with him. He noted your change in attire, tight shorts and a baggy shirt, a change from the long sleeve and sweatpants you had on moments before. He also noted your hesitancy in climbing onto the bed, as if you played out an entire scenario while standing at the side before just climbing in and laying to the left of him, turning to your side to wrap your arms around his left arm and to drape a leg over his hip.

   Originally, you both just layed there, intertwined, Carlos ready to go to sleep with you finally there beside him, but that when he felt soft, timid kisses being placed up his neck. He couldn't help but smile endearingly at your attempt to set a mood, working diligently to hold in a chuckle with each unsure kiss you pressed with your pillowy soft lips. It was similar to a doe taking a chance to walk up to you, one wrong move and they'll retreat for good. "Hey, hold on." He says this quietly, and he could tell from your still hooded eyes that you were only stopping to follow whatever brief instruction he had for you, but instead of instruction, he just shifts his body up the bed so he was sitting up against the headboard, taking you with him and ultimately pulling you over his body so you were sitting on his lap eye level with him. The abrupt change in position is what broke your trance and caused you to stare at him in the eyes, unsure of what to do next. "Just keep doing what you were before, cariño." You stare at him for a second longer, just until he gives you the slightest of nods, in which you reluctantly go back to placing gentle kisses along his jaw. "Get closer, amor. Why are you so far away?" He presses his hands to your lower back to bring your lower body up his legs, your core dangerously close to the bulge growing in his shorts.

   There's a quiet hum from you that follows the adjustment. It basically had the same purpose as a warning alarm when starting up machinery, because after that soft hum came the unskilled movement of your hips over his, movement that surprised Carlos and cause him to bring his hands to your hips on instinct, immediately pressing you down onto his crotch and helping you with the movement. You pull away from your previous occupation of your lips to his jaw to allow your brain to comprehend the, not quite new, but definitely enhanced sensation, eyes failing to meet his and instead settling on his lips. He didn't allow that though, as one of his hands came up to grip your chin and manually place your eyes on his. "Mírame, mi cariño. I want to see how good I make you feel."

   Boy did he get his wish. You did as told and held the eye contact, mouth falling open as you continued to rut your hips into his. This is all the stimulation you ever tried to get from Carlos, so he wasn't surprised to see you pupils already blow out in lust, but it was the knotting of your eyebrows that hinted that this time was different. That you wanted more and just didn't know how to ask, but Carlos was patient. But he also knew he would have to force it out of you, eventually. And so his grip on your hips got firmer and you could feel that your body had been pressed further down onto your boyfriend, creating delicious friction that was working to bring you to that high you so desperately craved. You bit down on the inside of your lip and began to move your hips faster, but the even further furrowed eyebrows caused him to put the hand breaks on your hips. You whimper in protest, only wanting to make yourself feel good as you've had time and time again, but your eyes are met with wide ones trying to asses your thoughts, trying to make you answer an unasked question. When no answer comes he is forced to verbalize it.

   "Do you want more, mi cariño? You've got to use your words." You nod, voice trapped in your throat from your earlier shyness, but you somehow manage to rasp out the words you needed to.

   "I need you, Papí." You buried your head into his neck as you said this, starting your hips up again but you're quickly stopped again and Carlos' fingers lace through your hair, gently tugging back, knowing the delicate handling needed by the style, so you were looking him in his eyes again.

   "Eyes on me, cariño." You nod at the instruction and he releases his grip on your hair letting his hand fall to your cheek. "We'll go slow, okay?" Another nod from your lustful but slightly concerned face has Carlos guiding you into a kiss. Starting off simple, like your first kiss in the park in Monaco, lips pressing gently together. You feel Carlos actively work his lips between yours and you knew to open your mouth slightly, and follow along with the movement of his tongue. Your arms move from being wrapped around his neck to his chest, your fingers just now realizing he was shirtless and causing a stifled moan that came out more like a short, pained exhale. It was like the new level of salaciousness you were experiencing caused you to slip in and out of consciousness because it wasn't until your shirt was halfway up your raised arms that you realized Carlos was removing your shirt, exposing the red lace trimmed bra you were wearing. "Eres tan hermosa, mí cariño." He tore his eyes away from your breast to look you in your eyes, eyelids relaxed and mouth slightly agape, showing your teeth a bit when you smile at the compliment.

   "Gracias, papí. It's all yours." It was Carlos' turn to break eye contact now, bring his hands to run over your breasts, his first real look at them, and boy was it a treat. This moment was fleeting, eyes returning to yours and lips crashing back into each other, going back to the sloppy work they were doing before. You pressed your body as close to his as you possibly could, hands combing their way through Carlos' thick, dark locks until you just couldn't hold off anymore. You lift your body from his laps and begin to pull at his athletic shorts, eyes focused on the obvious bulge that you were craving to see the source of. 

   "Wait a moment, cariño." He holds your wrists in a firm grip and silently urges you to look at him, and when you do he gives you a domestic grin. One that you reciprocate before giving him a simple kiss, going back to basics. You sit back and wait, mind finally coming back to the situation at hand, how exposed you both were, what all of it was leading to. Your instincts told you to pull away from the hands that were now wrapped around your torso to undo your bra, but your brain quickly overrode that thought, reminding you that this is the man you love who loves you twice as much and you have been wanting this for a while now. So you let it happen. Let your bra be flung off to the side and kisses be pressed into the valley between. Let his kiss swollen lips mark a slick path to your nipple, your head tipping to the side when he takes it in his mouth. Let innocent mewls drip from your mouth at the new sensation and feel your core get warm and slick in anticipation.

   When Carlos had his fill of your chest for the time being, he pulled back again to look in your eyes but you could feel his hands venturing down to your shorts but not yet inside. He flicked his eyes down to his hand and then back to your face. "Is this okay?" You nod and brace yourself for the sensation, having never been touched in such a way, but when it didn't come, you put your attention back in Carlos' face, stern with an inquisitive eyebrow up. "You need to use your words, amor."

   "Oh, uh, yeah. Th-that's fine." You look back down at Carlos' hand that remains still until a sudden grip on your cheeks from Carlos' other hand brings you gaze back to his, only then did his statuesque appendage dip into your shorts and lightly graze your clit, your body jolting at the feeling.

   "Mírame, mi corazon. Don't look away, please. I want to see what faces you make. Faces that only I have had the opportunity to get from you, mí inocente cariño." Carlos coos before moving his hand again, rubbing a full circle on your clit this time. You let out a lewd whine and squirm your hips, feeling yourself clench around non-existent stimulation. "You want a finger, amor? Does my pretty girl want to feel Papí's fingers inside of her?" Carlos drug his middle finger along your entrance, surprised at how wet you were already, eager to know what sounds and faces you would make being fucked by his fingers, but he waited for your verbal response.

   "Mmm, yes, please." You spoke with a needy whine and bucked your hips against his hand, getting sticky juices up to his wrist. He flashes an maniacal smile and pulls your face to his for a messy kiss you were very much not ready for, finding your impatience darling. He then had to stifle a cruel chuckle when you let out a shocked and slightly uncomfortable whimper when he finally does stick a finger inside of you. He removes it and goes back to rubbing your clit for a moment, giving you light kisses along your jaw.

   "You okay?" There was the slightest remanence of that chuckle in his voice, but not enough for you to notice or care because you just go on to answer his question so he is able to continue.

   "Your fingers are much thicker than mine." You whimper, your pouted lips the perfect target for Carlos' as he presses his finger back inside of you, dragging along your soft walls and his palm pressing against your clit as he moves his finger.

   "You've been using your fingers?" He wondered if you realized what you admitted to when he inquired this, but the answer was obviously no when you go on to mindlessly answer his question.

   "Mhmm. Did last night." You nod, face still being held by the large hand of your boyfriend, eyes still forced to look into his as they being to display a touch of overwhelm.

   "Were you wishing they were mine?" Carlos' finger held a slow steady pace, a second one coming to join the first, adding to the already full sensation. The spongy texture of your g-spot acted as a target that he put more focus into hitting, which caused you to move your hands to grip his wrist.

   "N-no, I-not your fingers. You…" You didn't want to be looking at him when you hinted to imagining him fucking you with wild abandon, but your face was still in his grasp, eyes having only the options to look him in the eyes or the mocking smile on his lips. 

   "You were wishing I was there to fuck you! Oh, cariño, that's cute. How about I help that wish come true, hmm?" He slips his fingers from you and removes his hand from your shorts, his index and ring finger glistening obscenely with your juices and your mind has to reboot after watching him suck said juices off said fingers. He finally removes his other hand from your face and reaches over to his night stand to reach into the drawer to grab a condom, the shiny wrapped object being held briefly between his lips so he could close the drawer again. As he went to pull down his shorts, he stopped to take a look at you vacuously watching his movements. "Here. You take them off." He takes your wrists in his hands and brings your hands to his waistband.

   "Oh, okay." You accept the task with a high-pitched whisper and lightly grasp the waistband of his shorts and underwear, taking a deep breath and then slowly pulling down. You watched as the bulge at his crotch was revealed, his dick springing out, slowly falling onto his stomach, the tip glossy from precum. The crinkle and tearing open of the condom brings your eyes back to Carlos', noticing that they seemed darker and his pupils were obviously blown out.

   "You know how to do this?" He hands you the condom when you begin to nod slowly, watching as your warily remove the object from its wrapping and place it on his tip, shaky hands having trouble starting to roll it over him. He brings one of his hands to wrap around yours, guiding your fingers in rolling the edge of the condom around his tip and then moving that hand to your hair when you're able to finish the task yourself, trying his best not to thrust up into your hand, which looks absolutely adorable wrapped around his dick. You make this a bit harder for him, intrusive thoughts taking over and making you start to stroke him over the condom, hand moving easily due to the lube that came on the object. Carlos had to stop you before it went too far, taking your hand and using it to guide you in flipping your positions, you now laying on your back with Carlos between your legs. He hooks his fingers to the waistband of your shorts and pulls them off with your underwear, a string of slick going with them for a second before he flings them off in the direction that your bra went earlier. Finally there you two were. Naked. Exposed. Ready to engage in the most intimate moment of your relationship to date. But Carlos had to have some fun with it. "If only all those people saw you now. Mi pequeña inocente, fucking herself with her fingers, wishing it was my dick. Maybe they'd shut up about you being dominant. You being the one 'wearing the pants'. But I'll let them believe that. As long as I get this. You waiting for me to fuck you stupid." 

   "Papí, please…" You whine out, reaching up to grip what you could of his hair so you could bring him down for a desperate kiss, pulling away to look at him with wide doe eyes. He takes the obvious cue and lines himself up with your core, eyeing you up and down before leaning over you, placing a hand by your head and using the other hand to toss one of your legs over his waist.

   "Okay, okay amor. I'll take it slow. Just know that it'll feel…different." You nod and look down at the gap between you two, waiting for your hips to connect and for the pressure and possible pain to follow. Instead came the gentle tip of your chin upward so you were looking at Carlos. "Mírame, okay?" You nod, now slightly nervous, but another short kiss, this time given to you by Carlos before he checks again to make sure he was lined up with your entrance then pushed in, slow as humanly possible. He paused when you let out a wail that you tried and failed at stifling.

   "Oh, oh. I'm sorry, I'm sorry…" Your incessant apologies are quelled by gentle kisses that trail to your lips, and a thumb coming up to your cheek to wipe a tear that you didn't know was there.

   "Shh, shh cariño. It's okay. We're on the complete other side of the house. You can be as loud as you need." You nod and wipe some more tears that you were now aware of. "Are you okay? Do you want to stop?"

   "No. No. I just need a moment…" You take a few breaths and try to adjust your body, trying to familiarize yourself with the pressure, trying to distract yourself from the initial feeling of being split in half that caused such a vocal reaction. He definitely felt thicker than he looked, and the visual you did get of his dick beforehand was nothing to sneeze at. But after a few more deep breaths and adjustments, you felt it was okay for him to push again, stopping intermittently when you indicated a need to stop until he bottoms out fully.

   "Everything okay?" Carlos does his best at gauging where you were at, eyes flicking over your face rapidly, searching for any sign of extreme discomfort. Instead, a soft grin appears and one of your hands reaches for his face, a gesture to which he responds to by leaning down and placing two slow, tongue involved kisses.

   "I love you, Papí. So much." There's a unique amount of emphasis that these words flowing from your mouth put on your lips, still swollen and parted as you gave him the "OK" to move. So, his hips hitch back, and as his dick drags deliciously against your walls as he pulls out, it's surface area touching every sensitive spot inside of you on the way out, and then they press forward again, dragging along the same spots, pressure between your hips reapplied but felt to a lesser extent, a gentle press all the way to your cervix, all for him to retract and do it all again. Your head tips down again, watching the agonizingly slow movement of Carlos' hips, watching him disappear and reappear from you, wondering how this was at all possible and how it felt so fucking good. Carlos allowed it this time. He was enjoying watching you, your face, confused and overwhelmed, because fuck, did you looked adorable on his dick. 

   Your arms autonomously drape over his shoulders, inadvertently bringing him down so that your foreheads were pressed together, nails just gently grazing his skin for the moment. "You're taking me so well, cariño. I could fuck you forever." Carlos was becoming more unhinged, hips starting to move ever so slightly faster, even with the tight grip your pussy had on his cock. His mind was traveling elsewhere. He loved you. He loved everything about you. This was no secret to anyone. But there was also a part of him that loved the challenge you presented. Your innocence and inexperience. Your reputation in the world that held no merit. Yeah, you were badass and didn't give a fuck about what people thought, but you weren't the unprofessional, hypersexual person people thought you were. And to be honest, he was glad that he was the only one who knew this you. The you currently bemused by the sights and feelings of having sex for the first time. "Mírame, amor, and tell me something…"

   "Mhmm?" His hand was gripping your face again, guiding your gaze and starving you of the hypnotic sight of his hips crashing into yours, dick plunging in and out, the shine on the condom from your juices increasing. But instead you were subjected only to the site of dark amorous eyes peering down at you.

   "Did you cum when you used your little fingers?" As he asked his question, he moved himself closer to you, changing the angle of your hips, lifting them up slightly which allowed his dick to push deeper. 

   "I-i don't know. I don't t-think so. I stopped when I got too sensitive." You pouted, remembering the intense feeling that you unwillingly had to ride out.

   "Aw, mi pobre pequeño. Let me try. You are going to have to relax, though." In that moment, Carlos seems to change the motion of his hips, rolling them more, causing his pubic bone ever so lightly graze your clit with each thrust. You attempt to protest, worried about what would come with the unknown experience, but a strangled whine instead erupts from your chest in response to Carlos' calloused fingers starting to rub circles on your clit, using your juices as lubricant to make the action more fluid.

   So, with one of Carlos' hand making its rounds on your clit and the other forcing you to look into his eyes as you make each ridiculous pleasure filled face, enjoying a bit too much the extreme reaction he has been able to elicit from you, your legs were left to wrap around his hips unattended. While it would have made sense for them to fall from his waist, they seem to actually tighten as you begin to near your climax. "Mmm…Papí…I ca-, I don't- I-" You weren't unfamiliar with what you were feeling, senses heightened, sensitivity in every nerve ending in your pussy amplified by a thousand. It was whatever came afterward that concerned you.

   "Let go, cariño. It's okay. I'm here. It'll make you feel so good." So you listen to the instructions cooed down at you and let yourself fall over that pleasure threshold, allow all nerve endings reach a peak sensitivity, your body to stiffen and your back to arch. The walls of your pussy fluttered around Carlos' dick as he continued to hitch his hips into you.

   "Carlos…" A whiny sob bubbles from your chest as he continues to thrust, unintentionally overstimulating you as he was too focused on how adorable you were all whiney and tired, pussy still spasming, squeezing him and producing more of it's own lubrication making the obscene sounds of him fucking you senseless louder with each thrust until he finally finishes in the condom, whispering about how in love with you he was in an intoxicating mixture of English and Spanish. Once you both came down from your highs and cleaned yourselves up to the best of your tired ability, you two fell asleep immediately, only to wake up close to noon the next day and, once you both were presentable, make your way to the kitchen greeted by the knowing look of his mom.

yn_music

Liked by theestallion and 428,748 others

yn_music ✨Do not Disturb✨

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latto777 An icon 🌟🌟🛥️

carlossainz55 I thought we agreed the bikini photos was for me only, amor?

>yn_music Lo siento, Papí. But I looked too cute not to share ☺️😘

>carlossainz55 Fine. We have more that's just for us anyway ♥️

user13 I see so many people commenting about how they seem so happy together but does anyone else notice that they are only together on expensive looking getaways

>yn_music We were actually in Madrid to see his family, but thank you for showing such concern for my boyfriend 😚

user14 I need you two to stay together forever for my sanity, okay?

>carlossainz55 We will try 😁

>user14 Thank you 🧎🏻‍♀️

carlossainz55

Liked by landonorris and 401,803 others

carlossainz55 Mí cariño hermosa 😍

tagged yn_music

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yn_music 🥰😚🥰😚🥰

>yn_music Even though you're determined to make me look like the most chaotic person on the planet

>carlossainz55 It's because I like these pictures of you (and the people deserve to know the truth 😶‍🌫️)

>carlossainz55 And not all the good pictures of you I have are appropriate 😘

landonorris Hi Mom! 👋🏻

>yn_music Boy if you don't stop calling me Mom 😤

>yn_music Jk hey baby! 👋🏿😘

user15 AHHHH! THE HEADSHOTS! THATS SO FREAKING ADORABLE

>carlossainz55 I think you'll be even happier to know that she got those taken just to give to me as a birthday present

>user15 I am 🥲

user16 It took some work and emotional damage, but I'm glad to see that Carlos and Yn are unapologetically in love 💕

#formula 1 #black reader #f1 imagines #formula 1 x black!reader #f1 x black!reader #request #carlos sainz x black!reader #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz #carlos sainz jr #f1 smut #f1 fic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 scenario

[alxtiny]

You like me? | Song Mingi x reader

Synopsis: where you confess you feelings to mingi unintentionally

Pairing: Song Mingi x gn!reader, college au

Genre: fluff, crack?

Word count: 0.7k

Warnings: none :)

Notes: Happy Valentines day to all the other lonely souls like me, I hope this makes a part of your day better

masterlist

In the quiet corners of the university library, you found solace among the shelves of books and the gentle hum of whispered conversations. Seated across from your best friend Yuri, you couldn't contain the excitement bubbling within you.

"He's just... so unbelievably pretty, Yuri," you sighed, your eyes glazing over with admiration. "I mean, have you seen the way he concentrates on his music? It's like watching magic unfold." you exclaimed, throwing your hands up in exasperation.

Yuri chuckled, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "Ah, yes of course the infamous Mingi I’ve been hearing about so much these days. I see your crush has reached legendary status."

You opened your mouth to protest, but before you could utter a word, she continued. "You know, if he likes you back, then it wouldn't be wrong for you to make some moves on this guy, right?" She grinned mischievously. Letting out a groan you slumped forward, resting your chin on your pile of books, “What am I gonna do, he’s infuriatingly difficult to decipher.”

Smiling at you fondly, Yuri placed her hand gently on yours. "Come now Song Mingi can’t be that hard to figure out. He seems like a nice guy."

Shaking your head at your best friend, you let out a sigh.

“You're probably right, but his cryptic words are giving me headaches. I don’t even understand half of the stuff he talks about whenever we’ve talked before. Plus, he hasn't shown any signs of liking me.”

"And he’s always so focused on what he does to even notice me properly. Did you know he’s a music production and sound engineering major, Yuri," you continued, animatedly gesturing with your hands. "Apparently he gets the best grades in his year. He must really be talented. I like him so much it hurts at this point.”

As you ranted about Mingi's talents and irresistible charm, Yuri's gaze shifted over your shoulder. Her expression changed from amusement to shock. With the sudden shift in her face, you followed her line of sight to find Mingi standing there, clad in his usual dark glasses and with his unruly hair sticking out at weird angles, it all made him look so endearing to you.

In one hand, he held a sleek midi keyboard, and in the other, a small bouquet of flowers. Your eyes widened, and you could feel the heat rising to your cheeks as Mingi spoke in his soft voice, "You like me?"

You were brought back to reality, caught off guard by his sudden questioning. Stuttering slightly, you managed to nod and confess, "Uh, y-yeah?." His lips quirked upwards and you could see the pink tinting the tips of his ears. His shy smile made you want to kiss him senseless, but your legs suddenly felt very weak.

A mischievous glint appeared in Mingi's eyes, and he grinned. "Well, then I guess you won't say no to the date I was gonna ask you on." Without waiting for an answer, he placed the bouquet of roses in front of you, and placed his own instrument down on the table next to you.

Your heart fluttered uncontrollably, and you smiled back at him sweetly. A genuine smile that reached deep into your chest and caused your heart to swell with happiness. Your friend watched on curiously, smiling brightly as she watched your painfully shy ass interact with Mingi.

"I was hoping you could spare some time tonight so i could show you my work, since last time we talked you said you wanted to hear it,” a blush crept up his neck and face, “Of course if you’re busy, I understand,” he said gesturing to your books.

A shy smile spread across your face as you giggled and, unable to resist, leaned in to kiss his cheek. Yuri, still in shock, watched as her ultimate ship came true before her eyes.

Mingi's eyes sparkled even more, his face becoming the embodiment of the 🥺 emoji. "Is that a yes??"

You nodded, your heart pounding with excitement. "Absolutely, Mingi. I'd love to go on a date with you."

Yuri finally snapped out of her initial surprise and clapped her hands in glee. "Finally! My ship has started sailing!!" She looked at you with dreamy eyes like a little child who had been given candy as you and Mingi simply laughed at her expression

© alxtiny . Do not steal, plagiarise, translate, repost, or use my works on any platform in any way.

Send an ask or a message to be added to taglist

DISCLAIMER: THIS IS PURE FICTION AND NOT RELATED TO THE MEMBERS OF ATEEZ IN REAL LIFE PLEASE DO NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY

Taglist:

#ateez fanfic #ateez fluff #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez x reader #ateez #ateez reaction #ateez smut #ateez x y/n #ateez x you #mingi oneshot #mingi angst #mingi imagines #mingi fluff #mingi ateez #ateez mingi #mingi x reader #mingi smut #mingi scenarios #mingi au #mingi drabble #mingi fanfic #mingi x you #mingi x y/n #song mingi

[runa-falls]

Soo, (reffing to fluffer ff) how do you think the boys would react if they couldn't request you because you're working with somebody else or if they see you working with someone else?

ooooh shitttttt 🫢 alright, let's explore that shall we?

a/n: uhhh….i’m so sorry that this took so long omg 😭 i love you nonnie, i just forgor~ i'm making a second part to this where they find out reader was an amateur porn star before she became a fluffer :3 it's mostly all smut ngl, so anyway...

cw: explicit smut w/ jake only.. sry marc/steven hoes (18+), jealous!marc [angst, fluff], soft!steven [fluff[, out-of-pocket!jake [straight smut], inaccurate depiction of sex work, dirty talk, not proof-read!!

w/c: 1.7k [my baddd]

Fluffing for Others:

Being a fluffer was your job before you met the boys and you continued to do it after. The thing is, after you met the boys, you were so busy working with them that your already limited work schedule had no space for other clients.

But occasionally, one of your earlier clients will request you months in advance for a big project, and you have no reason to decline them (that is, until the boys convince you to stop working).

Marc [slight angst, fluff]:

"Sorry baby, I can't make it Tuesday, I have another client--"

Marc was just telling you about his next production that's set to film in the next few days.

Of course, he springs the gig on you just as it's about to happen.

He always does this, assuming you'd be free, and happy to join him. He never gives you more than a week to prepare, and usually you're fine with it. But this time, you're busy.

"Wait, another client?" You nod, but he's still not getting it, like he can't believe his ears. "Like a different client? Like an 'outside of this body' client?" You sigh.

Of course, he's reacting like this.

"Yes Marc, an old friend called and booked me for the week. I put it on the joint calendar, didn't you see it?" His eyebrows furrow as he takes in your words. "He's doing a movie length exclusive, so he called way in advance."

"But...but what about me?" He pouts -- literally pouts -- as he walks closer to you, backing you against the kitchen counter.

You raise a brow, "What about you?"

"What am I gonna do?" His hands hold you by the waist, pulling you close while he nuzzles his nose against your neck. He does this when he's trying to comfort himself -- buries his face against your body and holds you close.

He's so dramatic.

"Don't be so whiney, Marc. A girl's gotta work too." He hmphs in discontent as he hoists you onto the edge of the counter. You loop your arms around his neck easily and make him look at you. His soft brown eyes shyly meet yours, "I don't complain when you fuck your co-workers."

"That's--"

You send him a warning look, "I swear to god if you say it's different..."

"No, you're right, honey..." He's sheepish when he looks at you, realizing how his jealousy got the best of him once again. "I just...want you all to myself sometimes." You peck him on the cheek, then his jaw, then his neck, suppressing a smile as he leans into you with a sigh. He's so easy.

"I'm yours, baby." His hands squeeze at your waist at those words. He loves hearing you say that. Loves that you're here in his kitchen, always ready to receive his needy affection.

"So... are you free next week?"

You snort.

"Marc, you can't keep moving your productions for me. You could always find another back-up fluffer..."

"Not doing it without you." He mumbles, lips brushing against yours.

You lean into him and your noses nudge against each other. You're not quite kissing him, but when you're looking into his eyes like this, it feels just as intimate.

"Yeah, I'm free."

He grins, "Good. It's a date." He captures your lips in his and you wrap your legs around his hips to pull him closer.

---

Steven [fluff!]:

Telling Steven was pretty easy. He knew about it before you even told him, seeing it on the 'family calendar' that you forced each boy to join.

"You need a ride to production Monday? I could call you an early cab as we don't have a car and all. Don't want you to have to catch the bus."

Steven is lying next to you, having woken up in the body this morning. He's always been more of a morning person compared to the other boys, despite looking perpetually tired.

"Aw, thanks honey, but I'm fine. Their sending a company car since it's such a long filming schedule." You snuggle up closer to him, craving his warmth from the morning coolness that blows through the flat. He lets you settle against him, wrapping an arm around your torso.

"A company car? ...fancy."

"Anything is fancier than our usual walk and transit ride." You giggle against the thin fabric of his shirt, slightly muffling your words with how closely you cling to him.

Steven is dressed in Marc's pajamas: a tight undershirt and briefs, clothes you rarely get to see Steven in when he's fronting. Usually, he prefers looser clothing made of soft and comfy materials.

You can't complain though. Seeing Steven (unintentionally) show off his built body while acting all cozy and sweet makes you heat with want.

"You don't mind I'm working for other clients again?"

He tilts his head as if he's just now considering it.

"No, why would I? It's your job, just like how I have mine."

You pause, surprised by how cool he is with it.

"Oh...yeah."

“I actually thought you'd be doing this more often..." You look up at him, meeting his soft and sleepy gaze, "I mean, I thought everyone would be requesting you." He whispers, unsure if you'd appreciate his comments.

You hum, "I only had one company that hired me as a general assistant and only three regulars." You smile at him, remembering the first time you met him, "But then I met you guys, and you took over my whole life."

"...Then we met you, and now you're our life." Your heartbeat picks up at his words. It feels like something is squeezing at your chest in the most pleasant way possible.

Steven never realizes how poet and sweet he can be. You truly believe he just says whatever is on his mind.

"But you still work, and I still need to work..."

"You’re so beautiful, sweetheart, anyone would be lucky to be in your presence, let alone touched by you.”

You bite your bottom lip, hard.

How can he say such wonderful things? Make you feel so tender and loved that you could fall apart under his gentle gaze?

Intense emotions tighten in the back of your throat and all you can do is hold him closer, clutch him until he can feel what you're unable to voice.

"I love you, Steven. You know that right?" It's barely rasped out, but he hears it.

"Of course, darling." He pecks the top of your head, "You know I love you more, though."

A smile pulls at your lips, "Impossible. I love you so much you can't even comprehend it."

He chuckles before offering his rebuttal, "Well actually..."

---

Jake (NSFW 18+):

Jake took it as well as you thought he would...

His hand squeezes lightly at the sides of your throat, testing the waters as he continues to rapidly thrust into you. You wince as his fingers dig into the fresh bruises that he suckled into your skin earlier.

“Bet they wish they could fuck you like this...feel you quiver around their cock," You groan as he angles his cock to drag against the walls of your cunt, expertly nudging against that explosive spot inside of you. "But they can’t, because your mine, right honey?”

You nod wordlessly, barely able to comprehend what he said.

He buries himself deep inside of you with a huff and holds himself there until you're squirming under him. "Right?" He grits out, frustrated with your lack of response.

Your body shakes as his cock continues to press flush against the back of your cunt, sending sparks of overwhelming pleasure all over. You feel so full, completely stretched, and filled to the brim; you can barely move without crying out.

"Yes, yes, please, Jake, I'm yours--"

He pulls out briefly before swiftly pushing back in and it feels like you had the wind knock out of you. "That's right, baby, take it. Show 'em who you belong to."

You shutter out breathes as he works himself into your body, holding you down so you can't move a muscle without him knowing. Sloppy sounds remind you just how needy you are for him, how much you love it when he treats you like this.

Jake lets you go and work for clients, but he'll be damned if you go without his mark on you. Without a physical reminder that you're his.

It's not that he doesn't trust you, he just doesn't trust them.

You're the perfect woman, someone he couldn't resist when he was just a client to you. So how can he be sure your other clients won't try to woo you like he did?

"Fuck, honey," He growls, grinding his hips against yours, wanting to be as close to you as possible so he can cum deep inside of you. "You're so good to me, letting me do this when you gotta be on set in an hour..."

Your head is tilted back, and eyes are closed tight as you desperately try to hold back your orgasm, waiting for him. You whine as he rubs your clit, legs trembling around him.

"Please, Jake, cum for me...c-cum inside..."

"You gonna keep it all in for me, baby? Keep me stuffed inside of you as you jerk some loser off?" You cry, clenching around him as he coos at you, unable to hold back anymore.

"Mm... that’s right, honey, let go. Go ahead, soak me." He grunts when he feels you flutter around him and pushes in deeper, enjoying how tight you get when he talks dirty to you.

You writhe pathetically under him as you ride out your high, whimpering as he sharply fucks a few last thrusts into you before painting your walls with warmth. He fills you so much it starts to drip out of you as he pulls out.

His fingers push it back in before anymore could escape and ruin the couch under you. He hums thoughtfully as he fingers you, making sure you're all filled up for the day.

"Looks like you're ready for work." His eyes drift over your lust bitten lips, the marks covering your neck, and the mess at the center. He smirks, proud of his work.

"Thanks, baby." You smile sweetly.

You really do have the best boyfriends in the world...

#anon #pornstar!moon boys #marc spector #steven grant #jake lockely #steven grant x reader #marc spector x reader #jake lockely x reader #steven grant fluff #jake lockely smut #marc spector fluff #too many tags

[youwerenevermeanttofeelalone]

Productive Ways to Make Up | Dean Winchester

✦ pairing — Dean Winchester x afab!female!Plus Size Reader

✦ word count — 2.1k

✦ request — Maybe taking charge of the plus size reader. Like hot angry rough sex. Spanking maybe? Idk that just seems like it would be a good one. Maybe just they get in a fight during the holidays. Like at the readers family’s Christmas party. Then dean takes charge of her and they have angry rough sex

✦ warnings — nsfw, teasing, hints of a fight, smut, spanking (reader receiving), angry sex, rough sex, fellatio, face fucking (reader receiving), vaginal fingering, vaginal sex, unprotected sex (please don’t do this), creampie, aftercare.

✦ author's note — changed this to a New Year’s party just to fit the date better.

════════════════════════

The fight got out of hand easily, as things often did with Dean. It was one of those fights that you didn’t know how escalated to this, on this day specifically when you needed him on his best behavior.

Your parents had been excited to finally see you for more than a couple of hours, happy that your hectic schedule had given you a break for New Year’s. You had to skip Thanksgiving and Christmas because you were out of town, your mom didn’t take it well. This party was supposed to be perfect for everybody.

Dean rarely made things hard for you, but he had to do it today, apparently.

You left early, making up an emergency with Dean’s brother. Poor Sam, you had to drag him into this just so your dad wouldn’t start hating your partner out of nowhere.

For the first time in a very long time, getting home was worse for your mood. Dean didn’t help, glaring at you as you peeled off your jacket as if you had done anything wrong, as if you started the stupid fight.

He grabbed you by the hips before you could leave the living room, grip tight and strong. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“To the bedroom. Or am I not allowed?”

“Watch it,” he warned.

“I need to call my mom and assure her Sam isn’t dying.”

Dean pushed you against the wall to stop you, trapping you with his warm body to the cold wallpaper.

“Dean…” You struggled against his hold.

“Oh, honey, you know what you’re doing, don’t you?”

In most circumstances, you would wiggle against his hands just to egg him on. But this time, you honestly simply wanted to annoy him into letting you cross the living room and hopefully find the warmth of your cozy bed where you could call your mom and take a nap.

Dean had other plans. You hated that you weren’t as against them as you wanted to be. After all, it was a more productive way to take out your anger than yelling at each other in the middle of the half-empty living room on New Year’s Eve.

Your breaths mingled as both of you opened your mouths to say something. Dean took charge, as he often did with these things, and leaned in to kiss you.

A hand of his came up to grip your chin, forcing your mouth open to slip his tongue past your red lips. You squirmed, feeling your skirt ride up at the movement between the wall and Dean’s bulk.

“Don’t be a brat,” he gritted out. Yet he traced the outside of your thighs with both hands, forcing your skirt to bunch up at your hips. Humming against your skin, he manhandled you toward the couch.

His hands fell on your ass. He made it jiggle with a light spank, laughing when you gasped in surprise. “That okay?” he asked.

“Yeah,” you consented.

He immediately spanked you again. “Count for me.”

“One,” you mumbled as the first slap landed. Dean hummed, you could picture the smile on his face, and did it again. “Two.”

“See how easy everything is when you listen to me?” He sounded almost condescending. Slapping you again, harder, he waited for you to count once more before rubbing his hand over the spot he had just hit.

He made you count to ten, careful not to make you cry. No matter how pretty you looked with tears streaming down your face, this was clearly about control, not a punishment.

Rubbing your ass, Dean ripped your pantyhose and spread your legs open. “Of course you’re fucking dripping already.”

He sat on the couch and brought you onto his lap. You would probably ruin his new pants, but by the way he grabbed you and pulled you into a sloppy kiss, that was his intention.

You moaned as he pushed his tongue against yours. Before you could start enjoying yourself with the kiss, Dean pulled away. He even laughed when you whined.

“Be patient,” he told you. “You aren’t supposed to enjoy this too much.”

You pouted, naively thinking it would convince him. Dean wasn’t in a playful mood, he just wanted to remind you who was in charge and why. His grip on you tightened, bringing you flush against him.

The tent in his pants brushed against your sensitive skin. He purposefully drove you to move your hips backward, then forward. You rested your hands on his chest, grinding against him of your own volition.

"You're enjoying this, huh."

Dumbly, you hummed. His laugh almost snapped you out of it, but it was too late. You cried out as he stopped you from keeping grinding. It bordered on torture, feeling the texture of his pants on your bare skin, rough and so readily available for you to get off.

Dean pushed you to your knees and undid his pants in haste, pulling his cock out of his underwear swiftly. He petted your head for a moment, then tapped his cock against your cheek. “Open up.”

You did so, resting your hands on your thighs in expectancy.

He caressed your cheek before shoving his cock into your mouth, only careful not to get to your throat for a moment. As he hit your throat, you gagged from the force, then relaxed as your brain registered what was happening.

He groaned as you began to hollow your cheeks, thrusting his hips up and choking you with his cock. You gagged once again, balling up your fists. Not touching him was worse than the sensation in your throat, that one you weirdly enjoyed, something about him causing you to gag and slobber all over his cock simply did something to you.

He knew.

“Should have known this would shut you up.” He rutted his hips, groaning deeply as his cock slipped down your throat.

He grunted as your tongue slid along his cock, gripping your face tightly so he could fuck your mouth at a quicker pace. The only indication you got that he wanted to come was him pressing your face to his pelvis.

Before you could taste the familiar salty cum, he pushed you off his cock and caressed your neck with his thumbs as he regained his breath.

"On your back."

You understood he meant on the couch simply because you were sure he would never fuck you into the floor when your backs were so ruined from all the hunting. So you laid on the couch you had fucked on more times than you could count and waited for him to get inside you.

Dean showed you two fingers. "Keep these warm for me, yeah?"

You nodded and opened your mouth, eager to suck on his fingers. Dean cackled, shaking his head.

"Can't leave this pussy unattended, honey." He teased at your entrance, gathering the slick dripping down your labia. "So good for me," he mumbled to himself.

Sliding his middle and ring finger inside you, Dean hummed to himself. "Knew you'd be warm and ready for me."

Teasingly, he curled his fingers. You whimpered.

"More." You couldn't help yourself.

He started shoving his fingers in and out, thrusting like he had done this a million times before. He almost had. The lewd sounds bouncing against the walls made your skin grow hot, feeling yourself getting more aroused at the wet echoes.

You squeezed around his fingers and rolled into his hand. Dean tsked, shaking his head. He tried to hide his proud smile from you as best as he could, but the cockiness always won over. His thumb grazed your clit as he wiggled his digits inside you, crisscrossing them.

"You know what? Go ahead, fuck yourself on my fingers. Can't do all the work for you."

Rutting against Dean's hand, you allowed yourself to enjoy the tendrils of pleasure every time his thumb made contact with your clit and his digits became buried inside you. He would stroke against your movements when you would get too complacent, reminding you he was still in charge. As if you would have it any other way.

You gasped out his name, hands floundering in search of something to hold onto. Dean removed his fingers before you could even grasp your orgasm.

Taunting you, he licked his fingers clean. "You would have made your mess already if you hadn't been so difficult earlier. You know that, right?"

You mumbled a reminder, "You were difficult too."

"Take that back," he demanded, wrapping a hand around his hard cock.

You shook your head, frustrated to no end as Dean started to pump the cock you should have been riding already.

As if reading your mind, and somehow agreeing, he roughly grabbed your thighs and forced your legs open enough to slot himself between them. He slapped his cock against your clit, smirking when you jolted. He did it a couple more times, only stopping when he dragged his tip along your slit to wet it.

Dean coated his cock all over with your wetness, using his fingers to gather some more for good measure. The emptiness inside you grew. All of this was not only unnecessary but only dragged your so much-needed pleasure.

"Gonna fuck some manners into you, honey," he announced in glee as he pushed inside you.

"Uh-huh."

He hovered over you to kiss you, sticking his tongue into your mouth while holding your legs open. You panted as he thrust into you with little care of pace or rhythm, only worried about fucking you stupid.

"I can feel how badly you want to come already," he boasted, relentlessly pumping his cock into you like he would die if he didn't reach as deep as humanly possible. "Hold on," he insisted, almost desperate. "You gotta wait until I tell you to."

Just as you were going to hum in acknowledgment, he pulled out and forced a desperate cry out of you. Dean grabbed your hips, guiding you onto your knees and hands.

Pressing his chest to your back, he pushed back in. His hands moved to your belly, searching for the hem of your top; as he found it, he rode it upward. Some of his fingers were ice cold, leaving goosebumps all over your skin as his hands reached your breasts.

He pulled on your breasts as he pistoned into you, quickly and harshly, pushing your face into the couch. You gasped for air, whining as you ground back against him, chasing permission to come.

Dean wouldn't relent that easily. He dropped your breasts, wrapping an arm tightly around you whilst resting his other hand on your thigh. Slapping your clit, he started to pant in your ear. "You're so fucking close," he told you, as if you didn't feel like you were on fire.

His fingers drew circles on your clit, applying as much pressure as your desperate humps and his hurried thrusts allowed him to. "Come on," he encouraged you, "let go. Make a mess all over my cock."

His thrusts only slowed down long enough for you to ride your high, coming so close to using him to get off that you hoped you would remember to plant the idea of trying that out into his head. He picked up the pace again, taking advantage of your pulsing walls and your half-relaxed state.

"Inside?" he asked breathlessly.

"Yeah." You moaned at the overstimulation, hoping he would just come already so you wouldn't have to go through more of it right now. Maybe later.

Not only did he fill you with cum but he pushed it deeper with a couple of pumps, moaning through a string of curses. His embrace loosened around you, but Dean didn't let go.

With his chest against your back and ragged breath in your ear, Dean coaxed you into laying flat on your stomach. "You okay, baby?"

You hummed. "Yeah, all good."

He kissed your shoulder and slowly withdrew from you, slipping out. "Gonna clean you up," he told you before you could ask if something was wrong.

Cleaning you up with a damp rag, Dean caressed your skin soothingly. "Can you sit up and drink some water?"

You gave it a try, groaning as you turned around on the couch. Sitting up was especially daunting as your sore ass made contact with the cushioned seat.

"I..."

You looked up at him, glass in both hands.

"I'll run you a bath, then we'll call your parents and invite them over for dinner this weekend."

"Really?"

"Really."

By the end of the night, you called your mom from your warm bed, head on Dean’s chest while his fingers traced your back.

#dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x plus size reader #dean winchester smut

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Unexpected 50

Warnings: non/dubcon, pregnancy, pegging, Lloyd being the worst, post partum, csection, suicidial ideation, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

Your promise to Lloyd is empty. You have no great urge to see Andy again. You’re embarrassed at the thought. Even a bit guilty as you accept that any sliver of excitement he brought to you has flown away. The return of your husband drags you back down to earth in the most desolating way.

You swipe away another notification. You don’t know how to reply to Andy. It doesn’t seem right to tell him over a text. Still, you can’t bring yourself to face him. Your last two conversations haven’t been exactly productive. How many times can you tell him this was never meant to be anything more than sex?

That’s when you feel rotten. You used him the same way you’ve been used. Just a release, a thing to make you feel better about yourself. Worse, he’s a widower. He’s lost so much already and now you’re toying with him. That’s hardly fair.

You sit with Luna on the floor. Getting down there was hard enough and you don’t want to ponder how you’ll get back up. She lays on her mat, raising her head to look around. She’s still needy but you see her changing. Maybe she sees the same in you with how she stares at you.

There’s a knock at the door. You brace yourself. You already know it isn’t Lloyd, he would just barge in. You know he hasn’t changed at all. Luna’s head bobbles as she tries to look around and you call for whoever it is to enter.

“Hey, we goin’ on that walk?” Harlen asks as he enters, already half-dressed for the dipping temperature. You notice the metallic red thermos in his hand, “I was hopin’ to get out.” He present the capped container, “got us some hot chocolate even.”

“Oh, that’s so sweet,” you make yourself smile, “yeah, that might be a good idea.”

“Here, let me help,” he sets the thermos down and crosses the room, offering his hand to haul you up.

“Go on, get ready,” he bids as he grunts, bending to pick up Luna from the floor, “oh, she gettin’ heavy.” He stands straight, “I need the workout anyhow.”

“I have a suit for her. Thermal,” you explain as you search the dresser against the nursery wall. The last few nights you’ve spent sleeping in the glider chair, your own fortress in a castle not your own.

“You let me worry about that,” he nears, rocking Luna in one arm as he takes the insulated outfit from you, “go get something warm on. You gotta take care of you too.”

You look at him. You nod. He’s the only man you can’t bring yourself to argue with, maybe because he’s the only one who’s ever really cared. You love that about him but it makes you think of your own dad and how he would rather his flask than to spend a single birthday with you.

“Right,” you surrender, “I won’t be long.”

You leave the nursery and head down to the guest room. The door is already unclasped but you don’t think much of it until you enter. You find Lloyd sat on the foot of the bed with the little crescent moon toy Luna likes so much. His eyes flick up as you sigh.

You ignore him and go to the closet. You take out an old sweatshirt and dig out some jeans from a drawer. You feel him watching you. You hear him get up and come closer as you take out a pair of wool socks.

“Gonna be Christmas soon enough…” he says.

“Oh shut up,” you snarl.

It’s his turn to sigh. He angles around to stand beside you, facing you, and puts the toy on the dresser. You walk away from him and he follows you towards the bathroom door. The very idea of him seeing how he ravaged your body, the stretchmarks and the loose skin, repulses you. You won’t give him that victory.

As you try to close the door in his face, he forces his foot between it and the frame, “you have to talk to me eventually. She’s my daughter. I have a legal right–”

“Why did you come back? I know it’s not because of her,” you lean on the door. He’s just as strong as ever. If he really wanted to, he could overpower you.

“You,” he says. “I was always going to come back–”

“No, no, no. Lloyd, enough lies. It’s over. You know that. Whatever made you want me, I’m not it anymore. So whoever you were out fucking, go back to them. You won’t get anything from me.”

“I didn’t–”

“Fuck. Off.”

You stomp his toe and he recoils. You take the opportunity to slam the door and flip the lock into place. You keep your hand on the door and catch your breath. You hear him on the other side, lingering, the friction of his touch dragging down the other side.

“Peaches…” he says.

You scoff and push away. You go to the counter and put down the armful of clothes. You look at yourself in the mirror. You don’t even feel bad for yourself, you feel worse that Luna has to call someone like him a father.

🍑

You meet Harlan downstairs. He has Luna bundled up and helps you get her strapped into the baby carrier that hooks over your shoulders. It’s much easier than the stroller, if not a bit of a strain on your back.

He tucks the thermos into the large pocket of his coat and opens the door for you. He trails you outside into the brisk air of late autumn. The chill nips at your cheeks and nose as you adjust Luna’s hood to make sure she’s cozy.

“Thanksgiving soon. Dot was talkin’ bout it,” he says as you walk down the long driveway, “she talkin’ a lot lately. Driving me a bit crazy.”

“Oh,” you raise your brows dully. You haven’t said much to her. You resent her for all those weeks of sticking up for her son and her tune hasn’t changed, “yeah, maybe… get a turkey.”

“Ha, come on, what are we gon’ do? Sit down for a family dinner? She just wants peace but she won’t acknowledge the battle,” he puffs as he takes out the thermos and untwists the cap. “Here?”

He offers you a drink first. You stop awkwardly to sip from the brim and thank him. He takes a gulp of his own and hums.

“Not too bad,” he comments, “was of a mind to add some whiskey but we’ll save that for later.”

You chuckle and shake your head. You set off down the sidewalk, keeping a hand on the bottom of the carrier as you make slow progress. It’s the sort of cold that wakes you up. It reminds you of the day you met Lloyd and you scowl. A year. More than.

As you come to the end of the street, someone turns the corner. You don’t pretend to be surprised as Andy approaches. He wears a navy cap, his hair poking out from the hem, and his cheeks are rosy above his thick beard. He smiles as he nears, even as his eye twitches.

“Morning,” he greets brightly, “how’s little Luna?”

You slow as he glances at the baby in her harness. You sway with her as she babbles.

“She’s good,” you answer as Harlan clears his throat. You sniff as you try to roll the tension out of your shoulders, “oh, Andy, this is my… dad, Harlan. Harlan, Andy. The neighbour.”

“Sir,” Andy smiles and offers his hand, “nice to meet you. You must be so proud of your daughter. And granddaughter. A beautiful pair, huh?”

“Beaming,” Harlan shakes his hand gruffly, “couldn’t ask for anything better.”

“Well, uh, I was actually gonna pop in. I found some more baby stuff and thought maybe you could use it,” Andy rescinds his hand, tucking it in his jacket pocket. “I could watch Luna if you want. Give you some time off.”

“Oh, Andy, that’s sweet but… I got all the help I need,” you peek over at Harlan. “I appreciate everything but I hate to take advantage of your kindness.”

“It’s no problem. Really. I don’t mind,” Andy insists, only girding himself as his eyes flit to Harlan and he squares his shoulder, “just putting it out there.”

“I’ll… I’ll keep you in mind,” you utter awkwardly.

Harlan’s silent. You don’t have the courage to look at him. You can feel the tension radiating off of him. He’s shielded in that cool stoicism that once made you feel so small.

“Well, you know my number,” Andy shrugs, “I’m sure you can figure out how to reply to my texts,” he steps forward, gazing at Luna as he coos, surprising you as he bends to kiss the top of her head, “buh bye, Luna.” He grins, his eyes meeting yours as he stands at his full height, “pretty, just like mommy.” He nods and looks past you to Harlan, “try to stay warm out here.”

Andy struts past as you step aside. You hesitate before you continue on, quiet as Harlan lets a hum roll up his throat. He clucks and cranes to peer over his shoulder.

“That’s him?” He asks. You can only nod, staring down in shame. “Ah, well… you keep space from him… for yourself. Man’s got something ‘bout him…. Something off.”

“I… I’ve been ignoring him so…”

“No, no,” Harlan intones, “no, ain’t nothing ‘bout you.”

You stroll on, the uneasiness in his timbre crawling over you in goosebumps. You look down at Luna and run your hand up the back of the carrier, embracing her a little closer. Andy could be a little overbearing but he’s harmless, right?

#lloyd hansen #dark lloyd hansen #dark!lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen x reader #andy barber #andy barber x reader #drabble #series #unexpected #au #the gray man #defending jacob

[hanbindans]

zb1 as boyfriends!!

word count: 2.8k (only ca 350 for each) a/n: requested!! I wrote them in bulletpoint form in an attempt to keep a structure, but I do apologize if it's in-cohesive because my brain is still in finals mode (cries). I also apologize if you think my use of emojis is too much but it just makes sense. Hanbin stans who hate coffee just pretend you don't for this 1 post <33 thanks

jiwoong

You guys. Jiwoong is THE boyfriend. He knows all the in's and out's of boyfriending™ at this point. Will not disappoint.

He might fall in love a liiittle before you, but honestly it would be pretty mutual from the beginning. I think he would have to meet someone with the mindset that it would lead to a relationship (probably doesn't go from being friends to dating) so if he meets you and likes you he would make it known :)

Pretends to like dates in the beginning; going out to have nice dinners, going on late night walks in the city, visiting animal cafés, anything that gives you a chance to talk a lot and really get to know each other.

When he knows he's got you he will prefer at-home dates though because going out is a little too much effort and he'd rather just chill on his couch <333 If you still want to go out for dates though he would of course compromise!!!

Speaking of which- he's so good at communicating and making sure you're both happy, in the relationship and otherwise. Kind of loves when you come to him for advice or admit when you're struggling with something because he sees that as a big sign of trust.

"hey I bet you can't get me a bag of chips from the convenience store in 15 minutes" and you speed to the convenience store because you're a fool in love <3

I don't think he is super lovey dovey- he's more about the casual displays of affection. A "hey, you look really nice today" when he can tell you made an extra effort. A packed lunch waiting for you in the fridge when he knows you're going to have a busy day. Of course he lets you know he loves you, just not every second of every day.

In general he is a very chill, low maintenance boyfriend who is secure in your relationship. Is mature enough to communicate and compromise with you whenever you disagree on something (which is very sexy of him 🤌 we love).

zhang hao

Oh you're totally the one who falls in love first. He has insane rizz- like you're going to be crushing on him for a good few months before he develops feelings back.

Once he does though he's allllll yours. Looks at you with full on heart eyes and giggles at everything you say but is cool about it if that makes sense?? Like he acts unaffected and tries to be the cool and sophisticated boyfriend but it's painfully obvious he's totally head-over-heels in love.

He is 1. a busy man, and 2. an introvert, so his favourite type of dates are in calm and not-so busy places where you can just wind down and spend time together, like small cafés or going for long strolls in nature and just talking. He would also love to just stay at home as you both do your own things, just vibing in peace and being productive.

Will nag at you for every little thing but it's out of love. It's always "babe a granola bar isn't a meal 😒" and "I can't believe you never remember to apply sunscreen!!" but it's not to be annoying he just cares about you (and most of the time he's right).

Brings you cut fruits to snack on when you're busy doing something <3

One thing about Zhang Hao is that he IS a great boyfriend, but he will remind you himself through small comments. "Am I not the best boyfriend... Where else could you find a boyfriend like me... You're so lucky to have the handsomest boyfriend...." He loves you so much and he doesn't want you to find another boyfriend so he is pitching himself so you don't go away <3

The most caring boyfriend who will look after you and make you feel so so loved. Life is exhausting sometimes but this relationship is the perfect safe space for the both of you to relax and be unapologetically yourselves.

hanbin

I don't know if this is an unpopular opinion but I think he would fall in love first!! He's a soft boi at heart, when he meets someone he likes he falls hard and FAST. Luckily for him you fall back though because duh he's Sung Hanbin.

COOKING AND BAKING DATES OF COURSE!!!!!! He will seduce you by cooking your favourite homemade dishes and making you the best cup of coffee you've ever had. Also learns how to make bread so he can lure you into being his partner forever and ever 😈

If you were up for it, I think he would love to take you out dancing. He will teach you if you want and are worried about embarrassing yourself, he just wants you to go out and have fun together!! Probably knows all the good spots and will take you out on the occasional Friday night 🕺🕺

We know this man stays busy, so he might not have that much free time to spend with you... That being said you have his undivided attention whenever he does see you. You have something to say?? All other conversations are unimportant. You're going into another room?? He won't follow you around but he IS counting the seconds until you come back.

If you compliment him on pretty much anything he is an emotional wreck the rest of the day. Wuws his praise, especially from you <3333

Kind of his favourite thing to do is to sit down with you after a long week, have some snacks and some nice drinks ready, and you just rant to each other about work/school/people or whatever. Sometimes you just need to complain to someone you confide in, ya know?? And he needs to know who your enemies are because they are his enemies too.

He just likes you a LOT and wants to involve you in all his favourite things. Hanbin loves life and having fun- and he wants you to have fun too!! You are his most beloved person ever and he shows that by making you a part of his life in all the ways he can.

matthew

There's not a single alternate universe where a relationship with Matthew wouldn't start as friends to lovers. I'm sorry it just works too well with him. You start falling for each other at around the same time, but he's probably the first one to confess. You're both just two fools extremely in love <3

Absolute date master but it's completely unintentional?? Idk, I think he would plan really cute date like picnics in the park or at-home movie nights with dinner. He just has a knack for dates that make you feel like the main character in a movie.

He has one (1) mission and it is to devastate you all the time. Prepare to receive cute texts for no reason, matching jewellery, and for him to ask to take couple pics that he can use as his phone background 🥲

Will teach you his choreographies. Even if it's only two easy steps. Doesn't matter if you are a dancer or not. His baby will be able to dance to his songs!!!

You know how he wants to be the hot Canadian oppa or whatever? Your partner privilege is that you're the only one allowed to tell him he's cute. Like he loves when you giggle and ruffle his hair and kiss his cheeks but that's only because he loves you. If Gyubin tried that shit on Matthew he would be on the floor in a chokehold. Use this privilege wisely.

When it's just the two of you he literally can't keep his hands off of you. Wraps his arms around you so you have no choice but to lie down on the couch and let him hold you and press kisses all over your face. He just likes his cuddles.

Overall a very loving boyfriend who lives to let you know how special you are. You deserve to be treated like a k-drama main character- so he ends up doing all the cliché, cute and romantic things for you that he never imagined himself enjoying before- but now has a special person to do them with <3

taerae

You both start liking each other around the same time. He's a pretty social guy and just very easy to like, so I feel like you would become close pretty fast, and he would confess that he likes you pretty quickly too.

As great as he is to spend time with and talk to- he sucks at the whole dating thing. He does really like you and wants to spend time with you almost always, he just doesn't like the logistics of arranging a date. What do you mean they don't show that movie next Friday?? What do you mean we have to decide where to have dinner?? Please just tell him where you want to go and he will happily go there with you. He just doesn't want to do the whole planning bit.

Sitting together in his bedroom as he strums on his guitar and you do something else.

Very cheesy boyfriend but it's so cute <3 Tooth-rottingly sweet texts and compliments for absolutely no reason, thoughtful birthday gifts, randomly getting you flowers, the works.

He could be the mature, calm, chill boyfriend..... but why would he want to?? Much more fun being your kind of insane boyfriend who acts like the calm and chill boyfriend in front of other people. Like sometimes he has Einstein level thoughts. Sometimes he lies to you that there is a dog behind you just for shits and giggles.

I think he has a pretty high EQ and he would give great comfort and advice if you needed it. Always there for you if you need to rant about your day and that annoying person you don't like, or if you have a problem that he has to help you solve. Empathises really well and never judges you for your honest thoughts.

Taerae really is just a great guy to begin with, but when he's in a relationship with you he is the nicest, most fun and supportive boyfriend . Always willing to go the extra mile for you and make you feel like the most loved person in the world :)

ricky

Hmmm.... I mean there's a much bigger chance that you fall in love first than the other way around. That being said: he's absolutely whipped when he does start liking you back. Like. Gyubin would make fun of him because he literally can't focus on anything else when you're around. So in the end you're both fools in love <3

Oh the dates are going to be top tier. Your wish is his command and the budget is LARGE, so pretty much wherever you want to go or whatever you want to do, he will make it happen. But I think he has a soft spot for museums, art galleries, basically anything "cultural". Or just walking around the city at night and seeing what's open.

Wants to engage in your hobbies!! He will ask a million questions about your interests (sports, music, cinema, drawing, whatever you're passionate about) so he can see you nerd out and maybe understand you a little better. He will also be SO SO SO happy if you're willing to engage in his interests and watch his favourite shows with him because THAT is true love <33

Tbh he's not always great at clearly expressing or asking for affection- but the one thing he would actually ask for is head massages. After a long day, he just can't resist the temptation of spacing out while you run your hands through his hair. He is still too embarrassed to ask for it with his words though, so he just gets all quiet and leans his head onto you and hopes you get the hint (you do).

He also wants to share everything. Mostly shirts, hoodies, jackets- sometimes jewellery. Be careful because while this does mean you can borrow his stuff, he will also borrow yours. Hide your shit if there's something you want to keep to yourself.

He is trying to be the cool, sophisticated boyfriend- but he's just a big softie at the end of the day!! He secretly loves all the cute coupley things like fancy dates and matching necklaces, and he loves to surprise you and watch your eyes go all wide in awe. Really just wants to walk around and be in love all day <3

gyubin

Friends to lovers where you meet through mutual friends and are in the same friend group for a while, silently crushing on each other until one of your other friends gets sick of the tension and tells both of you that you like each other.

Dates are very spontaneous but always fun!! If he has to run errands or go somewhere he will force you to come with him to keep him company. In return he says something to make you laugh approx. every 4 minutes to keep you entertained.

Oh when I say that he is attached to you at the hip... He can't go a full day without talking to you- either by text, on the phone, or face to face. Even when he is with you he HAS to be touching you pretty much all the time- holding your hand and playing with your fingers. If you ask him to tone it down in public he will... Begrudgingly..... Actually physically holding himself back from grabbing your hand.

His one mission every day is to make you laugh at least once. Has a folder of memes saved on his phone that he updates regularly so he can send you something every day.

Prepare to share all your drinks and food for the rest of your life. You got a smoothie?? He's taking the first sip "tO mAkE sUrE iT's nOt pOiSonEd" (you get to try his smoothie too don't worry).

Other than the fact that he needs to be next to you all the time?? He's pretty low maintenance!! Is perfectly fine with spending a whole weekend rotting away in his bedroom, cuddling up to you and scrolling through tiktok as you show each other funny videos that pop up on your fyp's.

In general I see him as being a very fun and loving boyfriend. You are kind of just besties who kiss, ya know? He genuinely likes spending time with you doing whatever- you're the funniest, kindest, best person he knows- and he lets you know by sending "ily" texts at least twice a day and holding your hand everywhere you go <3

gunwook

Oh he has the world's biggest crush on you for a while before you ask him out (yes you need to ask first he's too scared <3). I'm talking "doodling your name in his notebook with hearts next to it" levels of crush. Loses his mind when you ask him out like YOU LIKE HIM BACK???? Crazy.

A very sweet and polite young man to begin with (lucky you!!), but it's going to be 10x more intense with the person he likes. Prepare yourself to be treated like you saved the world 3 times, ended world poverty, hung the stars in the sky, etc.

He's still pretty young and gets too attached too fast so initially he's very scared to mess things up. Googles 'date ideas' to come up with stuff to do and watches K-dramas to learn how to boyfriend (he has NO idea what he's doing. send help. but it's very cute). With time he becomes more chill though.

Think classic dates in the beginning; watching a movie at the cinema, going to a café, stuff like that. When he gets more comfortable it's more like chilling in his bedroom as you binge watch a netflix show or cuddle and scroll through social media in comfortable silence.

A little dramatic sometimes: he gets super excited over all your small achievements and exaggerates when he tells you how TERRIBLE and AWFUL his day was. Also needs reassurance every once in a while that you really do like him back because he gets in his own head too much. Kind of a drama queen but in the best way.

Wayyy too shy to initiate pretty much ANY type of physical affection so he hopes you will just initiate instead and hold his hand. Ya boy is trying to play it cool but is also a little ~insecure~ so he is in a constant dilemma between holding your hand versus not holding your hand. WHAT IF HE DOESN'T HOLD YOUR HAND AND THEN YOU BREAK UP WITH HIM????? He is distressed 24/7.

Overall- very sweet and shy and confused but he WILL try his best to be the bf you deserve!! He's still working on exactly how to do that but rest assured: he does love you to bits and wants more than anything to make you smile every day 🥲 Best boy.

#zb1 scenarios #zerobaseone scenarios #zb1 reactions #zb1 imagines #zb1 fluff #zb1 drabbles #zerobaseone imagines #zerobaseone drabbles #zb1 #zerobaseone #kim jiwoong #sung hanbin #zhang hao #kim taerae #seok matthew #shen ricky #kim gyuvin #park gunwook

[witlesswitnesstm]

Ok so I haven’t posted anything about this before, but I feel as though I have to now because this obsession is taking over my life.

The Marvin Trilogy: My Speculations about Marvin’s sexual trauma

(Surprisingly, I’ve seen almost no one talk about this)

Cw: Pedophila, SA, mention of suicidality

For this, I am taking from both the 1979 album and the 1985 rewrite of In Trousers.

So, the elephant in the room: Set those sails. When I first watched the Trinity College production, the entire song gave me a sense of unease unlike anything else. There’s this whole depiction of Mrs. Goldberg stripping in front of Marvin, a 14 year old, and then Marvin backing away and watching all of the ladies sing. I want to note here how Marvin doesn’t sing in this at all. Then the song ends, and Mrs. Goldberg claims the entire song was a highschool fantasy by Marvin. See, I don’t doubt that parts of it were definitely made up, but I think Mrs. Goldberg coming onto Marvin was not. To me, Set those sails is Marvin’s interpretation of his teacher’s assault. He’s trying to justify his uncomfortableness by imagining this scenario is a sort of “wake up call” to manhood. One of the lines is “You might tell me you’re a victim, you might get what you deserve.” Which, in my opinion, is near damning evidence to suggest that Mrs. Goldberg groomed/abused Marvin in some way. She says that she can’t excuse a boy who’s lost his nerve, which seems to me like her encouraging Marvin’s perception of masculinity, and saying that he needs to reciprocate her affection to be a man. There are further references to how a good man never fails or how men account for the appetite of all, that could be him trying to tell himself he should’ve enjoyed it. A “good man” in Marvin eyes, is someone who has incredible resolve to his heterosexuality, and always lusts for women. What better a way to prove that than to pretend he enjoyed being assaulted?

Next, I want to note the differences between Set those sails and the R—- of Mrs. Goldberg. The r of Mrs. Goldberg is incredibly childish, and it’s clearly stated at the beginning that it’s a fantasy by Marvin. In this song, Marvin has the control. He’s the hero who takes Mrs. Goldberg instead of the other way around. He has no clear understanding of what sex actually is, and just wants the absolute power that is implied with it. I personally like the interpretation that Marvin made fantasies of having control to cope with being assaulted. I also like the interpretation that this song is a story he made up to tell others in order to “prove” his heterosexuality. As I briefly mentioned earlier, the behavior of Marvin between the 2 songs is also very stark. In set those sails, Marvin actively tries to get away from Mrs. Goldberg and stays absolutely silent. This is extremely uncharacteristic of Marvin, especially at this age. He always acts out, he always yells, except for this song. This deeply contrasts the R of Mrs. Goldberg, where Marvin is loud and happy, as usual. I take this to mean that Set those sails is one of the few moments where he is truly paralyzed.

There are a few references to Mrs. Goldberg’s misconduct in Highschool sweetheart as well, even if they are a stretch. Marvin says “She gives me words to say” and while this is obviously a reference to the script, it might also be her telling Marvin to lie about what happened. There’s also Mrs. Goldberg saying “Stop making me crazy, Marvin. I love the way Marvin acts, I do.” which is obviously about his unruly behavior, but might also be about her sexual feelings towards him.

As for how this ties into the main theme of misogyny, misogyny affects all. The idea that women are docile and innocent, and men are sex crazed is a product of misogyny. Marvin holding this belief actively hurts him over and over again, blaming himself for not living up to this standard. I truly have no idea if this is what William Finn intended, but I find it interesting how it all fits.

Moving on from childhood, let’s talk about Nausea before the game. Besides probably being my favorite song in the whole show, it gives a whole lot of insight as to how Marvin feels about sex now that he’s presumably experienced it. The constant references to games are important here, I feel like. Marvin absolutely loves winning. He even says that winning is everything to him in The Chess Game. Marvin would do anything to win, including forcing himself through intercourse he desperately does not want to have. It’s implied that he literally throws up afterwards, trying to purge himself of his shame. He even prays for it to stop, but inevitably, it never does. And of course this all stems from his internalized homophobia, and the added layer of possibly being assaulted as a child just makes the entire situation even more tragic. Having sex with Trina could *literally* be bringing back traumatic experiences. This also makes me feel for Trina, because she did nothing wrong. She just wants love, but Marvin is so fucked up. There’s also even more references to being inappropriately touched in highschool with the line “It's anxiety when you recall girls who touch you when you're walking down the hall.”

My chance to survive the night just further elaborates how much Marvin hates being heterosexual. I find the word “survive” to be very peculiar in this case. It went from “winning” sex to “surviving” it. This might imply how worn out he is because of all of this, focusing his attention to his literal survival than his pride. It might also imply suicidal thoughts during sex, leading to him just wanting to live through it, although that might be a stretch. (Marvin’s suicidality is a whole other can of worms that I’d love to get into in another post). One thing though, I don’t actually know if My chance to survive the night is before or after Nausea before the game, but it has a similar implication either way. Anyway, there’s one verse in the song I want to note. Marvin says sex as a dance, but he describes all the movements very objectively, and notes how he isn’t very lucid about it. This might be a sign of disassociation, which is a common trauma response. Another thing from this song is that he says he wants to sleep, but the phone will ring (Presumably a call to intimacy). And this theme of wanting to sleep but not being able to is a theme throughout the whole musical. There’s a reference to it in Nausea before the game with “If I touch her would she let me fall asleep?”, and many references in “I can’t sleep”, but I think that song is more about how Marvin’s ex lovers haunt him in general.

Next up, I want to talk about Your lips and me reprise. This really digs into the whole “Marvin’s ex lovers are haunting him” deal. This is the first time we really see Marvin actually acknowledge the ladies’ accompaniment for his songs, and it’s because of his guilt for making up a story about Mrs. Goldberg. I think Marvin thinking about this in one of his most private places, his shower, just shows how much this affected him, even in adulthood. The line “My body is not yours to hold” by Mrs. Goldberg is extremely powerful, and I think it could have multiple meanings. It’s Marvin’s guilt about fantasizing about her, yes, but it could also be him finally accepting that what he and Mrs. Goldberg did wasn’t supposed to happen. The ensuing panic attack is caused by Marvin’s perception of his childhood crashing around him. If anyone has seen lars_orange’s animatic of this song on YouTube, I really love their depiction of Marvin recovering from his panic attack. He thinks about Whizzer, and he breathes. This is where Marvin takes a victory shower starts. He’s not ashamed anymore. (Unrelated, but is it just me or is this song seem like Marvin taking a shower after having sex with Whizzer? It’s referenced in How America got its name that Columbus planned to take a shower after he and Amerigo spent so much time together.)

Finally, I want to talk about Another sleepless night. Specifically the 1985 version. This gives a clue into how passionate Whizzer and Marvin are, even before The thrill of first love. There is one key difference in the lyrics from the college production to the actual lyrics. In the actual lyrics, there’s a line, “I’m feeling hot. He'll close his eyes, and then surprise: I'll be awake and performing” but the college production changes it to “He’s feeling hot. I’ll close my eyes, and then surprise: I'll be awake and performing”. The actual lyrics enforce Marvin’s need for homosexual intimacy, which feels very in character for him at this point. He’s craving anything other than heterosexual sex and he finally has that in Whizzer. The college lyrics paint a completely different picture, implying that Whizzer is the one who wants passion. Then Marvin says “He'll wanna sleep, but asks for more. To put up with a guy like myself must be a bore.” This suggests Marvin still feels a sense of guilt for not being able to give what others want from him. These different interpretations bring completely different meanings to the line “But he sleeps in this bed, with me, a survivor.” For the original lyrics, the connotation of “survivor” is positive; he’s survived his trauma and able to move on. For the college production, it’s negative; he still feels fragile or insecure because of what he’s been through. Ultimately it ends semi positively with both versions saying that Marvin’s never felt more alive.

Ok, god damn that was a lot of words. Short story, Marvin is hells of fucked up, and I really really really love the Marvin trilogy

#falsettos #in trousers #trinity college #musicals #god these musicals have ruined my life #William Finn is a genius #william finn #please talk to me about the Marvin trilogy #marvin trilogy #marvin falsettos

[readychilledwine]

You and I

Lose You to Love Me Pt 2

Summary - After running away to the Winter Court, reader has let go of most of her hope that she and Azriel will be able to be together.

Warnings - implied rebound smut, angst

A/n - so sorry this was delayed 💜

Peep Lose You to Love Me here

You sprawled the bed you shared with Kal, eyes shut tightly as you snuggled into his chest and the blanket.

You had left the Night Court three months ago, and were hidden well into the Mountain House. You hadn't originally planned for this though. The feeling of cold fingers tracing your spine, the feeling of soft lips against your forehead. 

Viv had left him for Mor moments before your arrival, and in a state of need, desperation, sadness, Kal had taken you to his bed. 

And it just simply never stopped. 

In fact, his closet now held half of your things, your body products sat in his bathroom, your scent covered his sheets. 

To be fair, the soft scent of snow and pine lingered on you. His clothing had began to dominate your wardrobe. His voice had become a source of happiness.

You both knew this was nothing compared to the bliss you had with your mates, but it was still bliss. Joy you both had thought you wouldn't find and didn't deserve. 

“Why are you up already, snowflake?” He opened his icy eyes, looking down at you before placing a soft kiss in your head. “I know you are anxious, but Rhysand is coming to speak with us, not to rip you away.” Kallias was observant, you could not deny that. He always knew what worried you, what was on your mind, what you needed. 

“It's not Rhys I'm worried about,” you leaned further into his hard chest, lacing your fingers with his before you continued. “It's seeing Azriel. And you having to see Viv.”

Kal hummed, “Would you like me to distract your mind from that, or do you need to feel?” 

“Distract me.”

Kal had you dressed in a beautiful white gown with gems falling from the bodice to the skirts like snow. You were both waiting patiently, sipping a pear wine as you sat near a fire and he stood staring out a window with his hands behind his back. You almost jumped as the guards opened the doors, allowing Rhysand and Feyre in. Allowing Cassian and Mor in. Allowing Azriel and Viv in. 

They didn't approach you two, not with guards clearly placed for protection. Kal was quickly at your side, placing a hand on your shoulder when Azriel moved to come to you. “I would suggest letting your high lord handle this, Spymaster.” Kal inclined his head to the table, watching as they all took seats and took the head chair closest to you. “Are your questions answered? She is clearly healthy.” 

Rhys nodded, looking you over. “Come home. Please.” He was going straight for it. Mindset on a mission. “Nyx misses you. I miss you.”

“We all miss you,” Feyre said softly. 

You shook your head, finding Kallias’s hand under the table and feeling him give you a gentle squeeze of reassurance. “You hardly even spoke to me in the months leading to my departure.” Rhys flinched at the reminder that he had pushed you away all on his own. 

He would have normally straightened up, kept pushing his wants, his narrative. He would have normally defended himself, but he couldn't. He just nodded. “I know, and I am sorry.” 

You could feel Viv's stare and turned to Kal, “It's okay.” His jaw tightened, eyes flashing to you before going back to her. “Go.” They both stood, leaving the room with the guards behind them to go talk somewhere privately. 

“Does he love you,” Cassian asked quietly. “Does he make you happy?”

“As happy as he can. He cares for me-”

“But he doesn't love you,” Azriel quickly interrupted. “You're settling for a male who doesn't love you.” 

Rhysand pinched the bridge of his nose. “Leave.” He turned to all of them, including his own wife. “Go to your chambers for the night and leave us.” 

“No,” Azriel growled. “She's my mate.”

Rhys shot the two of you a look, his eyes wide before staring solely at you. “Y/n, can we go somewhere alone?”

You just nodded, standing and waiting for Rhys to round the table and take your arm. You snuggled into him when he did, but froze as a scarred hand grabbed your upper bicep. “I meant every word,” azriel dropped his hold on you, sitting back down and tucking his wings around himself like a defensive shield. 

Rhys allowed you to led him to your untouched room. He instantly noted how empty it was, how stale it smelled, how the sheets were fresh, but the bed help no signs of ypu ever having been in it. “Show me,” his voice broke. “Show me every moment where I failed you. Show me how to fix this.” 

You shook your head, teeth holding your bottom lip in place as tears began to fall. “It wasn't just you, Rhys. I felt unneeded and unwanted,” he visibly flinched. “By everyone. You have Feyre, Cassian has Nesta, Lucien had his own friends. Azriel-” your throat tightened again, looking to the ceiling you took a deep breath and continued. “Azriel had Elain. Amren found Varian. Fuck even Mor somehow stole Viv from Kal.”

Rhysand dropped the news that shattered you slightly. “Viv and Mor are no longer together. Viv realized her actions were incredibly stupid, that she loves Kallias, that having been with only one romantic partner wasn't a bad thing. She's here to ask him if she can come home.” 

You nodded. “He will tell her yes.” 

Rhysand moved closer. “Leaving you where, little moonbeam? What does that leave here for you?” The answer was nothing and you both knew that. You knew how deep that childhood friends to lovers to mates bond ran between the two of them. 

The High Lord of Winter loved you, but he would never love you the way he loves his mate, his wife, the queen of his world.

Just as you would never love him the way you loved Azriel. You should never find you soul singing for him the way it did when just the scent of cedar and chilled air floated into a room. You would never have butterflies for him the way you do Azriel. You would never ignite for him the way Azriel made you burn. 

“What happened between you and Azriel?”

The question hung in the air like a noose waiting to destroy you both. “After Solstice we,” you looked up again, caving and dropping your shields to allow Rhysand in. 

His jaw tightened slightly, looking away from you. “He does love you,” rhysand moved towards the untouched bed. “When our first letters to meet with you were met with silence, and then rejection, Azriel threw himself so deeply into his work Cassian and I began to worry.”

“I love him too,” the confession was silent and instantly met with hands grabbing your upper arms from behind, and a soft comfort scent. Rhysand moved to leave the room, presumably going back to the meeting room. “Did you mean it?”

“Every word. I meant every word. Every kiss.” He wrapped his arms around you from behind, holding tightly as you relaxed into him. “You are my first thought at sunrise, my lady thought when exhaustion forces me into sleep. Even there you haunt me, your voice. Your eyes. Your kindness. Sometimes I wake up and my mind is convinced you were there and that I can still smell you on my pillows.”

Your heartbeat increased at his words, mind swirling. “Kallias and Viv have not left her chambers, guards informed us we are welcome to head to our rooms, but the High Lord and Lady will not be leaving hers tonight.” You smiled at their happy ending coming back once again. “None of us thought that would last.”

“How could it,” you turned in his arms, moving to lace yours around his neck. “Some things are simply meant to be.”

“Things like you and I,”” Azriel held your eye contact, hazel eyes pleading. “Even if one of us was blind to that at first?”

You nodded, meeting him in the middle, knowing he didn't realize what he was doing. “Exactly like you and I.”

Azriel didn't hesitate, pulling you into a deep kiss. One that sealed itself like a promise on both of your hearts.

It was you and him, from here until time stood still.

#acotar #acotar x reader #azriel acotar #azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x yn #azriel x rhysands sister! reader #Spotify

[luveline]

Sunshine!reader decorating Hotch’s office w flowers nd pink things and Hotch just having to deal w it bc your smile makes it impossible for him to say no to you

hotch isn't madly in love with you, he swears. 1k fem!reader

Hotch is so surprised to see you that he says your first name rather than your last. 

"What are you doing?" 

You look up from his filing cabinet and smile softly. He thinks it's a wonder that your sweetness has survived so long considering where you work, that you can bring a little bit of sunshine with you no matter where you are. 

"Nothing," you say.

"I doubt that." 

He comes up behind you but leaves an amicable space between you, watching your fingers thread through the stalks and stems of a bouquet of whire flowers. 

"They're lilies," you tell him, pulling the nicest bulb to the forefront. 

He doesn't bother asking what they're for, or why you've brought them. He's sure the reason is clear in your own mind. Whatever it is, he sits down behind his desk and listens to your quiet humming. 

He feels his eyebrows rise of their own accord. "What's this?" 

"What?" you ask, turning to him. 

He takes a pink notebook into his hand. It's a pale pink, almost white. 

"Oh, that's for you." You put your hand on his chair and lean over his shoulder just enough for your perfume to tickle his nose. Slowly, you put your hand on top of his and open the book. "I know you've struggled to find time for yourself lately. I asked around, and the storehand I spoke to said that you only need five minutes every now and then to fill this in. It's to help you think about yourself, and what you want." 

"What I want," he says, smiling down at the prim dotted paper. 

"You know, what you want to be." You steal your hand back and move again to your bouquet. "Happy, healthy." 

"I am happy and healthy." 

"I know that. I think I'm just trying to encourage some selfishness in you, Hotchner. When was the last time you had," — your voice drops to a frustrated mumble as you wage war on a small leaf — "even a minute to yourself?" 

He scratches the sticky residue of a pricing sticker. "Right now." 

"No, you're with me right now. That is not time to yourself," you protest, grinning at him like he's the funniest guy on earth.

You ditch your flowers and gesture to the chair in front of his desk. "Can I sit down?" 

"Of course." 

You sit, throwing one starched pant leg over the other. He tries not to look at the stretch of your thigh. Succeeding, Hotch turns his gaze to your hands instead where you've pressed them to your neck, toying with the soft neckline of your cream sweater. 

"Is there something you wanted to talk about?" he questions, puzzled by your ensuing silence. 

You sink a little further into the chair. "Could I hide out with you for a while?" 

"Is everything okay?" 

"I love Spencer," you say genuinely, your jawline softening as you slouch in on yourself. He feels a pit beginning to form in his chest, a terrible, aching fondness for you and the way you talk. "So much. He's my best friend in the whole world…" 

"But?" 

"And," you correct with little malice, "lately he's been reading Dostoevsky again." 

Hotch laughs. "Ah." 

"Mm. Sometimes being his friend feels like being a reluctant philosophy major." 

"Well, you can stay, but I have things to do." 

"Of course," you say, nodding quickly. You pull your phone from your pocket. The sound of you typing is slightly grating, and the resin charms hanging from your phone case don't help, but he doesn't complain. He knows you're answering emails when his own phone beeps, a response to a case query he'd sent that morning. 

At least you're working. You're probably more productive sitting with him where Reid can't distract you. Though that's unfair — you and Reid feed into one another. You do your fair share of distracting. Case in point, his new pink notebook. 

His phone beeps again, and again. You've sent three emails in a row, but the third isn't in response to anything. 

The subject line is abrasive. NEED YOUR ADVICE. 

You've sent a list of web pages. He glances up at you but you're not looking at him, just tap tap tapping at the keys on your phone. 

The first link is a monster truck. The second, a thumb piano. The more pages he opens the more confused he becomes. 

"What advice?" he asks, breaking the quiet. 

"Jack's birthday," you mumble without looking up. "Last year I got him that bubble machine, and it was a bust." 

Hotch blinks. "He loved it." 

"Yeah, but I ruined your hardwood." 

He concedes, nodding his head toward his shoulder, "He uses it in the backyard."

Your phone starts to ring. "Oh, no. It's Spencer."

Hotch looks out of his office window, watching as Reid searches the office for you. 

You stand up and brush yourself down. "I can avoid the unavoidable no longer." You smile at him as you had when you first saw him, a soft thing, eyelashes kissing in the corners. "Please pick whichever one is gonna give you the least grief. Hello? Hi, Spence. No, I was doing something for Hotch. Yeah, I'd love to hear about it…" 

Your voice fades as you leave the room, exiting with a wave and a private smile. 

Hotch lets himself sit back in his chair but resists the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose. You're gonna kill him, one day, all your pinks and flowers and shy smiles. He shakes it off because he has work to do, so much work, and if he starts thinking about you he won't stop, reaching into his desk for a file and coming up short. 

There's a small plate inside, saran wrap covering what looks to be a half-dozen sugar cookies. A post it note brags their origin. 

For Hotch and Jack, 

They didn't have any blue icing at the store. P.S. Sorry for looking in your desk. I didn't see anything, swears.♡

#aaron hotchner fluff #aaron hotchner x fem!reader #aaron hotchner x female reader #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotchner fanfic #aaron hotchner fanfiction #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotch imagine #aaron hotch fanfiction #aaron hotch hotchner

[gtgbabie0]

Hi agian I hope you’re doing well! this time I have another idea a cute one I thought about when I was in the shower lol so probs shower thoughts but I saw a post saying Leon dyes his hair and I think he does because it went from the light colour all the way too dark.

For this I was thinking maybe RE4r Leon or RE2r Leon which ever one you think will work best and then the reader comes back home from work and calls out for him and he mentions he’s in the bathroom but when she does go inside his hair is all sectioned up with small ponytails almost like you’d see on a little kids hair and to find he’s dying one of the many sections he’s created and then asks the reader for help as he can’t do the back properly lol idk where this is coming from

Also I am totally in love with your writing it’s soo cute and beautiful as I’ve probably commented on a lot of posts but you leave me in awe every single time so please do keep it up ❤️🫶🏼

See you soon ✨

-Leon Kennedy x reader

{You help Leon dye his hair}

So cute!! Thank you for requesting as always lovely!! 💕

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It’s been a long day. Your coworkers decided they were just not going to help with anything at all, the entire day you had to do everything by yourself with little to no help, so to say you were stressed was an understatement.

You couldn’t wait to get home, to see Leon, more specifically. He was the highlight of your day and he never failed to make you feel better. Normally when you walked into the house he’d come rushing to you with a happy smile, helping you with your bags and coat, but today he was nowhere to be found, which was a little strange.

“Baby?! I’m home!” You shout, curious as to what he was doing as you kicked off your shoes before making your way up the stairs.

“Oh! I’m in the bathroom angel!” He says, your eyebrows knit together with genuine confusion as you walk towards the door. It’s only when he pops his head out do you burst into uncontrollable laughter.

His hair is pulled together in separate sections, little hair ties parting his hair and he can’t stop the chuckle that bubbles out from him as he watches you clutch your stomach with laughter, “What are you doing?” You giggle.

“I’m trying to dye my hair- but I- I can’t reach the back” he tries to explain through a fit of giggles, showing you the darker shade of brown box dye.

You can practically feel the stress melt from your bones, Leon didn’t even know how much he made everything feel so much easier, he meant to world to you.

“Oh- here let me help,” you tell him, walking into the bathroom as he hands you the plastic bowl of dye.

He watches as you follow the instructions carefully, “Thank you sweetness” he says, as you start to apply the product to his hair and in all honesty you couldn’t wait to see this new look.

You look down at him smiling proudly at your work as you study the dark brown dye that’s mixed in his hair, “You’re going to look so handsome” you tell him cupping his face in your hands as you pepper his face with gentle kisses.

His hands rest on your hips as he chuckles at the ticklish feeling, “I hope so because this is permanent” he says. You set a timer on your phone before cleaning up the bathroom with the help of Leon, although he doesn't help much instead he chooses to distract you with his kisses and gentle touches.

The timers soon goes off and you smile at the excitement that flashes through his eyes before he runs upstairs to wash the dye out from his hair.

Leon comes back down with an almost shy smile, his hair a much darker shade of brown than what it was before and there’s something about his new look that makes your chest feel all fluttery.

You walk over to him, threading your fingers through his soft, freshly washed hair, “Am I still handsome?” He asks, watching the way your eyes sparkle with love, and the sight makes his stomach all warm as he goes giddy under your gentle gaze.

“Yes, very handsome” you smile pressing a kiss to his cheek and then another to his lips. His hands settle against your hips, “Do you like it?” You ask your fingers still playing with the ends of his hair that sit on the nape of his neck.

“Yeah, it’s not bad,” he says, enjoying the way your nails lightly scratch at his scalp sighing at the relaxing sensation. You smile at the way his eyes softly shut.

“Oh! Baby I’m so sorry, I forgot to ask how your day was” he panics slightly, his eyes shooting back open as you giggle at his worry.

“It’s alright, my day is much better now,” you tell him, watching how his face softens at your gentle words, he pulls you closer to him pressing a kiss to the corner of your mouth as he whispers a quiet ‘I’m glad’ against your lips.

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#resident evil x reader #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy #leon scott kennedy x reader #leon scott kennedy #leon s kennedy x reader #resident evil #resident evil fanfiction #leon s kennedy #resident evil leon #leon s kennedy imagine #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy drabble #leon kennedy x y/n #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy fluff #leon kennedy re2 #leon kennedy oneshot #leon kennedy fanfic #leon kennedy fic #re2 leon #re2 remake #resident evil imagines #resident evil fluff #resident evil fic #resident evil x you #resident evil drabble #resident evil 2

[always-andromeda]

⋆⁺. ❅ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 ❅ .⁺⋆

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 ⟡ Joel Miller x F!Reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ⟡ 3.6k

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 ⟡ With Sarah away for the holidays for the first time ever, Joel is stuck without a single clue as to what to do for Christmas. That is when you decide to show him the most wonderful time of all. ♡

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 ⟡ Hey, Jana (@janaispunk)!! I'm your Secret Santa!! I really liked your prompts, so I ended up going with a little bit of almost all of them. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to write some absolute tooth rotting fluff and hopefully you enjoy some of the creative liberties I took!! I am a massive fan of your writing so I hope from the bottom of my heart that you enjoy this little piece!! Happy Holidays!! (divider credits go to @saradika-graphics)

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 ⟡ absolute fluff, bits of angst (Joel misses his daughter and has a hard time adjusting ;-;), no actual smut but there are a few suggestive moments (regardless, minors, please do not interact), no outbreak universe, mentions of Sarah sprinkled throughout but no mentions of Ellie whatsoever, mentions of alcohol consumption, non-religious celebration of Christmas, overall it's a decent helping of fluff with Joel learning to enjoy the holidays in a new way.

Sarah wasn’t coming home for Christmas.

When she had first called to deliver the news, Joel hadn’t known how to reply. He gave a curt affirmation and listened to go on about Christopher and everything pertaining to him. Christopher’s sister was going to take her shopping. Christopher’s parents owned horses. Christopher was going to take her to see a production of A Christmas Carol after having dinner at one of the nicest restaurants in town. Christopher, Christopher, Christopher.

The protective father in him was glad. Hell, he was overjoyed that she’d managed to find a guy who was so good to her. But the lonely, single father in him was…deflated.

For two decades she’d been home for the holidays. Year by year, no matter what changed, she was the one constant. There she was, dragging him off the couch to make cookies – because no matter how old she got, Sarah always insisted upon leaving some out for Santa. They’d watch Christmas movies and drink hot chocolate and for that moment in time…everything was wonderful. It didn’t matter how the business was doing or what kind of trouble Tommy had gotten himself into. Joel had his little girl. And for the longest time, he told himself that that was all he needed.

He tried not to let it bother him too much. Work kept him busy enough. He took pride in being one of the few contractors in town who’d take work with the holidays looming so closely. But he knew he wouldn’t be able to avoid the celebration forever. Especially when you started questioning, “What are we doing this year?”

For the last two years you’d joined him and Sarah on their yearly tradition: takeout and Christmas movies. It had been the time of his life, spending Christmas Eve with his favorite girls and waking up to you beside him on Christmas morning while Sarah made cinnamon rolls. And before Christopher came into the picture, he could’ve replayed that Christmas over and over again and he never would’ve gotten sick of it.

The first time you asked about plans, he evaded it, giving some vague excuse about not knowing what his schedule was going to look like.

The days flew by and your tone grew more impatient until one day, while you sat in the passenger seat of his truck, your question turned into, “Joel, what’s going on?”

He’d just pulled into his driveway. If he wanted, he could dodge the question again. He could get out of the truck and slam the door behind him, putting an end to the conflict before it even had the chance to begin.

Then he risked a glance at you. Already, your brow was furrowing in frustration. A solid pang of guilt thumped heavily in his chest. He really couldn’t afford to avoid this one.

“I just–” he hesitated, not knowing how to word it; not wanting to embarrass himself. “Usually Sarah would be home and–”

“Oh…” you trailed off, obviously detected.

Joel quickly added, “I’m sorry. I’m just used to her bein’ here.” You still wouldn’t meet his eye. He softened his tone before carefully taking your hand in his. “Listen, darlin’, it’s not that I don’t wanna spend the holidays with you. Believe me, I do. It’s just that I haven’t had a holiday without that girl in so long. I ain’t even sure what I’m supposta’ do.”

You nodded solemnly, voice quiet but rigid as you replied, “I get that.”

Joel sighed. “I raised that girl for her entire life. Every year I had to figure out what a girl her age might want for Christmas. An’ every single year she’d get all excited waitin’’ for Christmas mornin’. Gettin’ to see that girl smile as she opened up her presents…I don’t think I’ll ever forget that.”

Finally, you spared him a look as he stared off into space, his eyes getting a tad misty from the memories.

He met your gaze, smiled wistfully, and swallowed the lump in his throat, “I just miss my little girl. I don’t know what else to do.”

“I’m sorry, Joel.” You squeezed his hand reassuringly and managed to put on a smile with pursed lips. Even if you didn’t understand exactly how he felt, he was grateful for the compassion. If he had told Tommy or one of the guys on his crew…hell, he didn’t think he’d have been able to express it in the first place.

But they wouldn’t have accepted those emotions like that. Tommy especially probably would’ve offered to take him out for a few drinks later to forget about it all. And sometimes Joel didn’t mind that. But something told him that this wasn’t something Joel could just drink to forget about.

You continued suddenly, “How would you feel if I came up with some activities for just the two of us? Every day this week leading up to Christmas, we’ll do one thing. And you can opt out on whatever days you want if you have something else in mind. Let’s just have a quiet, gentle Christmas, okay?”

Sarah was only going to get older. And if things with Christopher went well enough…there were going to plenty of Christmases without her to come. Joel had to accept that sooner rather than later.

And that was how the so-called Wonderful Week began.

Day one was simple enough, or so it seemed.

In all of his grief, Joel hadn’t really thought to put up the Christmas tree. After all, that was something he usually did with Sarah. And he’d done a pretty damn good job at avoiding anything relating to her for the first half of December. But if there was any hallmark of the season, a tree was most definitely the big one.

So he wasn’t incredibly surprised when he came home from work to see a massive box sitting in his living room.

“Hey, what’s this box for?” he called out in the house as he set his keys down in the dish beside the front door.

You emerged from the kitchen, smiling ear to ear, two whiskey glasses filled with a milky substance in your hands.

“Hey, you!”

“Hey?” Joel cocked an eyebrow, noticing the bright red Santa hat on your head. “What the hell do we have here?”

That only seemed to make you smile wider. Your eyes lit up as you walked across the living room and handed him one of the whiskey glasses. “What we have…is a brand new Christmas tree,” you answered proudly, pausing and waiting for his reaction.

Joel only squinted before stating, “I still got a perfectly good tree in the garage that you coulda’ dragged out.”

“Perfectly good?”

“Perfectly good,” he affirmed.

“Joel, remember when we put that thing up last year? Almost all of the lights were completely burnt out. Remember how we had to go buy a separate string of lights? And remember how much you hated putting them on and taking them off? You’ve had that old thing since–”

“Since Sarah was little,” he answered curtly.

“Yeah…” you trailed off. Your smile turned sheepish and Joel could practically see the gears turning in your mind, wondering if you’d stepped over the line. 

Joel shot another hard glance at the box that sat smack dab in the middle of his living room. It seemed to challenge him. Was he really going to get this hung up over an old tree? Or was he going to take this opportunity in stride?

He looked back at you. You and your little Santa hat with the white puff ball at the end resting elegantly on your shoulder. Then there were your hands, nervously fiddling with the smooth edges of your whiskey glass. His gaze swept up to your hope-filled eyes that were awkwardly searching him for some sign of tension. He couldn’t be upset at any of that. You were only trying to cheer him up. What kind of Grinch would he be to get upset with a creature as gorgeous and lovely as you?

With a deep breath, Joel spoke, “Well. If we’re gonna put this thing together tonight…might as well get started, I suppose.”

At that, your whole being seemed to practically glow. You set your drink down on the coffee table before making your way to the box to cut at the tape holding it closed.

Joel took a swig of his drink. Egg-nog spiked with something. Another sip made him realize it was Kahlúa. He snickered and shook his head.

That was another little thing you’d gotten him into. Joe was firmly a hard liquor sort of guy until you insisted that if he liked plain coffee, he should at least try coffee liqueur. Sure enough, he liked it. Most of the time you were right about stuff like this. And here you were doing it all over again with this silly tree.

Before too long, you’d both lifted each section of the tree from its cardboard confines and nestled them on top of each other before locking them into place. Joel normally hated fluffing out the tree, and it certainly wasn’t made any better considering it was fresh out of the box. But the liqueur and the Christmas music you’d turned on and had softly playing in the background added a little ease to the task.

The best part was definitely adding the ornaments. Thankfully, you’d stuck with the old box of ornaments that he’d kept beside the old tree in the garage. For a moment he was grateful you hadn’t gone as far as getting brand new ornaments too.

He liked the old ones ten times more than he liked the old tree.

Of course there were random filler baubles in various shades of red, green, silver, and gold. But the ones that got to him were the handmade ones. Some of those went back thirty or even forty years. He pulled out a flat clay sculpture of a dog painted in blue that had faded significantly over the decades. Joel ran his finger over the words on the back.

Thomas Miller, 1980

Tommy had only been seven years old. His art teacher had just fired all of the ceramic ornaments the kids made before going off for winter break. Joel only vaguely remembered the day his little brother came home with that ornament in hand. But he remembered all too well how every year since he’d hit adulthood his brother would take a little glance at the little sculpture and proclaim that it was the best goddamn thing he’d ever made with his own two hands.

“Because I made it for my big brother,” he’d say in a faux sentimental tone. But underneath the machismo and the teasing, Joel knew that it really did mean a great deal to Tommy. Which was why he was still hanging it up thirty years later.

However, the next one made him stop in his tracks. Joel carefully pulled the ornament out from under a layer of bubble wrap. Though it was also made by Tommy, 

Sarah’s first Christmas hadn’t been the easiest. Her mother had just left and money was tight. Joel had been taking every job he possibly could to scrape together money for rent and the necessities. Tommy was still in high school and had his own life to live, yet he always offered to babysit Sarah after he got out of class.

That year, Joel hadn’t had the time to worry about the holidays. Little did he know that Tommy had been saving up since Halloween to get a little tree and some cheap plastic ornaments. But the cherry on top of it all was the one other ornament that Tommy made.

It was a small circle of clay, just big enough to fit in the palm of his hand. Right in the center was a little footprint. Words carved into the clay underneath it said: Sarah’s First Christmas, 1988.

Joel could picture it then, fifteen year old Tommy carefully pressing his niece’s foot into the clay before rewarding her with Cheerios. That period of time forged them into something greater than brothers, Joel thinks. It made them Sarah’s protectors. The ones who would always make sure she was taken care of. And no matter how old she got, that would always be true.

Right as tears started welling in his eyes from the memory, he felt your hand brush his shoulder. “You alright, Joel?” you spoke softly.

“Look at this one,” he answered hoarsely before showing you the ornament.

To his delight, you smiled tenderly and asked, “Where did that come from?”

Much of the night went that way with Joel telling stories about the various ornaments that were in his box and you telling stories about the ones that were in yours. After another drink, he found himself loosening up even more.

The two years prior hadn’t exactly been like this. Both of those Christmases happened before you’d moved in. Back then you were merely observing his and Sarah’s celebrations. This year was different though. This time…you and him were making up your own celebrations.

In the days following, Joel found himself looking forward to whatever you had planned. It was a relief to know at the end of a long day, he’d get to come home to you waiting with some new trick up your sleeve.

Day two immediately presented a challenge in the form of two gingerbread house kits. Because, you argued, who better to construct a gingerbread house than a contractor? Joel couldn’t help but snicker and roll his eyes when you pulled out a level and the tape measure from his tool kit.

“Think you got this wall straight, Miller?” you joked, holding the level up to the solid cookie wall. 

“You’re funny.”

“Just making sure everything is all even,” you shrugged. “One would hope that the big fancy contractor would care that his gingerbread house was up to code.”

Day three was a bit of an unexpected one. You finally got him to load up the boxes of old clothing and other odds and ends that had been gathering dust in his garage for far too long. Joel kept telling himself he’d donate them some weekend but continually forgot. So of course you were the one to remind him by remarking how important it was to give a little for the holidays.

It was a little bittersweet, especially since a good chunk of it was stuff Sarah had gotten rid of before moving out for college. Joel was all too aware that there was a small part of him that feared that the second he gave it all away, his daughter would definitely be calling him up just begging to have that butterfly tank top she wore in fifth grade back. But he also knew that that probably wasn’t going to happen.

So bye-bye went the dusty boxes of hand-me-downs, off to homes that could appreciate them again.

Day four brought popcorn garlands. He opted out of spiked drink for that one, knowing that he needed a steady hand if he was going to be able to thread delicate little pieces of popcorn onto some string. However, with his thick fingers, he still managed to poke himself with the crafting needle.

And really, making the garland was soon forgotten by the dozenth time you grabbed his injured hand to kiss it better. Joel really didn’t need any sort of alcohol in his system to start feeling lightheaded before pulling you into his lap for a bruising kiss.

By the end of the night, both of your garlands were only long enough to hang in a single doorway. But that was just fine with Joel.

Day five was Christmas Eve. Another night where he was sure you had something big planned – he later learned that you originally wanted to make Christmas cookies. But Joel was never any good with the whole cooking and baking thing. And tonight seemed as good of a night as any to take a load off.

“What will Santa eat when he comes down the chimney?” you protested in a teasing tone.

Joel scoffed, “Santa can starve for all I care. Tonight, I want to settle down and relax with my lady.”

“Lady,” you rolled your eyes. “Who are you calling lady?”

“You, Little Miss Christmas. Now go put your pajamas on. We’re gonna have a nice night in and you’re gonna like it.”

You laughed one deep laugh from your belly and replied, “Yes, sir.”

The next time you showed your face downstairs, Joel had planted himself firmly on the carpet with a box of old photos.

“Whatcha’ got there?” you asked as you folded your legs and settled beside him, resting your head on his shoulder.

Joel glanced over, catching the tail end of a wide eyed expression on your face as you peeked over his shoulder. 

“What’s that look for?” he chuckled.

Joel tilted the photo in your direction. It was a picture of you and him from the year prior; the second Christmas you spent with him. You were ice skating, Joel standing firmly behind you, one hand placed firmly on your hip and the other wrapped around you, keeping you from completely falling over.

“I didn’t know you got a picture from that night,” you mumbled.

“Oh,” Joel set the photo down and picked up a small, leather bound album from the box in front of him. “Sarah took a whole buncha’ pictures that night. They’re some of my favorites.”

“Really?”

Joel didn’t miss the sentimentality in your tone. He himself had almost forgotten that Sarah had brought her camera along that year. She’d taken a photography class during her freshman year of college; so it was practically attached to her almost every time she came home that semester.

She’d surprised him with the album a few months afterwards, raving about how adorable you and him had looked the entire night. I’ve never seen you get so sappy about a woman before, she’d teased him before adding, but it’s kinda cute, ya know?

Joel had brushed it off then, putting it with the rest of his old family photos. But over time it quickly began to mean something more.

He’d lost count of how many times he’d pulled that little book out and flipped through the photos. And now, for the first time you were looking at them with him.

“Really,” he asserted. “You look real pretty in all of ‘em.”

And God, did he mean it. On the next page was one of you wearing this red, satin number at a dinner party. He could easily remember the way that the material practically flowed down your curves like water. And he remembers the way his attraction for you pooled heavily in his belly and the way he had to make himself stay cool until he could get you home and get that outfit off of you himself.

The shot right next to that one was from the same dinner party. Joel had a can of whipped cream in one hand and a dollop of the stuff in the other. And there you were, attempting to lick at the smear of whipped cream on your nose.

He showed you the album and you grimaced before smiling sheepishly, “God, I can’t believe Sarah got that moment.”

God, that smile, Joel thought to himself. He could never get tired of that smile.

“Yeah,” Joel nodded. “I’m glad she did. I tell ya’, that girl can really capture the beauty in a moment.”

You started to speak, “You say beauty…I say–”

“Beauty,” Joel repeated. “You’re beautiful. And that’s that.”

You were quiet for a few seconds as Joel continued to flip through the album. The more little moments he remembered from the year before, the more gratitude welled up in his chest. And before he could really control it, his mouth was moving.

“You know I’m glad I get to spend time with you, right?”

“Oh, that’s good. After last night I was sure that you were just sick of me,” you quipped.

“I mean it,” Joel said with a playful nudge at your side. “I know I’m not the easiest guy to get along with. I’m old and I’m ornery and I’m probably a real pain in the neck sometimes. And the fact that you’re willin’ to put up with a pain in the neck like me…especially around this time a’ year…it means a lot. Everything you’ve done this week…all for me? I’m grateful, darlin’.”

Your expression faltered and you batted your eyelashes, gaze fixed on your hands in your lap.

“I just like taking care of you. I like making you happy,” you murmured.

Joel turned his head and leaned in, closing the distance between your faces.

“Good thing you always make me happy, darlin’,” he mumbled against your lips.

As he pressed a kiss against your lips, his hand settled on the small of your back, pulling you into his arms. The little photo album dropped between his legs and was soon forgotten, the same way a lot of his worries for the holidays had as soon as you came in.

At that moment…he didn’t think about Sarah. Didn’t think about her never spending another holiday in his home again. She'd come back home at some point, just like his worries probably would; he’d always worry about his little girl. Though he wouldn’t forget the years of memories he’d had before you, he wouldn’t let himself dwell on them for so long that he forgot about you. Your presence was more than enough of a present for him.

#˚ʚ meda writes ɞ˚ #space sisters secret santa 2023 #pedro pascal #the last of us hbo #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fluff #joel miller fanfic #joel miller fic