#and like people move on thats fine its just. idk it sucks | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sm0kebreaks · 1 year

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So like. As amazing at the tma has been about fat acceptance and love and has been absolutely vital to a lot of my self acceptance as a fat trans man, because this fandom actually talks about fat people (as opposed to other fandoms where fat characters and hcs are nonexistent), it means it’s also exposed me to the most and worst fatphobia of any fandom. I genuinely don’t even gaf about the actual discourse discussed in this fandom, it’s generally the people who negatively react to discourse of ppl complaining about fatphobia. The initial problems are usually ignorable to me, but it ends up bringing up peoples voices that make it incredibly clear what their true thoughts about fat ppl are. Idrk why I thought I should share this with you, ig just seeing if you have similar experiences.

I struggle here because i don't like to feel like i am attacking other artists. i'm a hater and i love to complain but i know i have my own short comings. but when it comes to the fatphobia in this fandom im always left not knowing how to talk about things because people will come to me and tell me why my complaint about someone thinning out a fat character is wrong or bad.

do keep in mind i dont really engage with the tma fandom as much i feel very much on the outskirts so this is jsut what i feel like i see on my end and i'm sure theres way more going on i simply dont know

in recent months we have had a newer influx of artists in the fandom who have come in with their own interpretations of the characters which is all fine and good. its jarring sometimes when we become so used to these formless characters looking a certain way that when new people enter the fandom with different ideas it feels wrong and like an attack.

the biggest issue has been people drawing a thinner martin. and while of course everyones welcome to their own interpretation and martin expressing that he's not exactly the smallest guy has multiple ways to be interpreted it is extremely frustrating to see people take that as giving him the most bare minimum extra weight. especially when having a fat character as desirable and as a love interest and such a Fun character is so far and few between

i could go on and on about how each time a popular artist posts a thin martin it gives everyone who looks up to them the excuse to do the same and it's why it's become such a prevalent thing lately. i don't think popular artists should have to worry about being good role models or anything in a fandom i think if youre making art you should do it for fun but it sucks to see when someone becomes so influential and are creating a problem. i deleted like three paragraphs on this alone so i'm going to move on.

i think what i see in the fandom most in regards to fatphobia is a skill issue. people don't know how to draw fat characters. but it also feels like people are barely trying. the artist i have in mind who i would consider to draw skinny martins DOES add a bit of roundness to him. i can aknowledge theyre doing SOMETHING. but you can't come to me and tell me that i can't criticize their art because culturally that's fat to them... like sure it could be. but it's also definitely a limitation of their art style and ability and instead of defending them and patting them on the back for doing good enough shouldnt we encourage people to grow and improve? what an amazing asset to be able to draw people of all size and variety. thats an AMAZING abillity to have in youre tool belt. i wish i had more resources for drawing bodyfat but unfortunately i do not. i have learned from looking at people and luckily having a lot of large loved ones in my life i've learned from as well as you know.. my own body to learn from. and learning to draw bodyfat and drawing characters i love with it has done wonders for my body dysmorphia.

i went on a rambling tangent and idk how coherent all of that is but the end point is that fatphobia sucks it has no place in this or any fandom and we need to practice our skills instead of erasing something that has made this fandom so wonderful to me.

here's some resources

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lunariamv · 4 months

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its time, im in my charon era

ive made my first three rpg horror games :DDD

there's three because two of them are parodies and then there's one actual legit one

all three are in authentic charon game format: rpg maker 2000, similar art style, similar horror premise, short story

i did it for the aesthetic OKAY

⚠️ Before venturing into any of my works, please heed my disclaimer/rules;; I don't want obstructive people engaging with me or my works ⚠️

✿ warning: running these games is a gamble because rpg maker 2000 is old software that windows is trying to assassinate (i cant even run it on my computer sometimes, i have to use a virtual machine or the game editor lol) so i apologize if it doesn't work ✿

the readme has troubleshooting solutions, and easyrpg exists to combat this, but it's not perfect. for example, it changes the text a little bit, which ruins the aesthetic

if ur like me and u care about the aesthetic a lot, then use a virtual machine, otherwise if you have a laptop and not a hardcore gaming pc, the game will probably run fine.

(the one time that having low quality graphics is good xD)

windows 11 users beware, im sticking with 10-

when all else fails i have gameplays available on my youtube

🌸 HERE IS THE GAME MASTERLIST 🌸 PLAY THEM HERE

!! please care and heed my content warnings when playing these games, as they contain dark subject matter; i promise ill make less edgy stuff in the future its just rn i REALLY WANNA MAKE CHARON GAMES FOR FUN !!

the first two (Akeno Delusion and Carousel) are strictly parody games on the genre, and Doom Stones is the authentic 100% serious charon game

looking back akeno delusion sucks to me but thats cuz its my first one and i gotta start somewhere, the quality only goes up from there

eventually ill stop using rpg maker 2000 and make games with the other makers for more versatility but rn im in love with the retro aesthetic im so sorry

*my art isnt that good but im getting there ok!!

also just a heads up, im not 1 to 1 charon; the aesthetic, artstyle, and story elements are the same, but i dabble in male yanderes instead and i go different places with the story;

🌸 mostly male yans

🌸 protagonist is actually a character

🌸 story goes a little more in depth

🌸 more focus on the horror aspect than sexual

so basically im like a female charon right now heheheh

i plan to make more rpg games, but for sure i want to make at least three more games with similar story beats.

its because i want my own take on the concepts -- doom stones is my take on makoto mobius, but i also wanna make a "scavenger hunt a person's house" type game like makoto nikki and a yanderella equivalent (but the love triangle has more drama)

AND…. MIX ORE BUT YANDERE BUBBLE TEA??????? :DDDD

once im done ill move onto dsp era cuz i wanna make some actual rpgs; like with the cute assets and pixel art

🌸 please follow and support me if you like these and want me to make more; this is just a small portion in the large list of games i wanna make <3

💮 please feel free to contact me regarding game ratings if you sincerely think they're off, im a noob when it comes to posting stuff;; and im just going off code of conduct, if it has any hint of explicit content its going to be 18+, whereas implicit would be like 17+ idk

im not taking any chances lol

🌸 I'd prefer if people don't contact me about troubleshooting problems, but if they have to, carefully go through my instructions first. even then keep in mind i might not be able to help;;

💮 I'm posting these games on tumblr only because they're short. If I make longer games, I'll crosspost them to itch.io or something.

🌸 I'll also make a website in the future, but for now I'll post the games on here. Thank you for stopping by!!

#rpg maker 2000 #rpg maker horror #☏ lunaspeaking #gamestuff #lunaria #lunariamv

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lorillee · 2 months

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3, 6, 14, 16. i want to see blood

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

i have to say the last one i talked about srsly takes the cake but another one i always think of is one person who was complaining about sabo from one piece's existence and was like .wait actually hold on i just remmebred there was this really annoying ace fan i saw let me see if i can dig up me complaining about it ACTUALLY WAIT NO NEVERMIND I JUST REMEMBERED A THIRD REALLY BAD ONE PIECE TAKE. sorry idk if you know one piece thats fine im goign to complain about ti anyways. for my remaining 5 one piece followers i will srsly never forget this one person who was genuinely ocmplaining about the end of whole cake island and OMG NOOOOO SORRY I WAS GOING BACK TO FIND THE POST AND I FOUND THIS ALSO

like im sorry youve srsly gotta be so crazy stupid to be making this kind of post DID YOU READ THE STORY WITH YOUR EYES OPEN....... "if any of you bothered to ask or care about me and my trauma" <- op forgot wci existed. EXCEPT SHE DIDNT BECAUSE SHE JUST HATES WCI APPARENTLY?!?@?!@??@$?#$?!?? BECAUSE ACCORDING TO HER THE STRAW HATS JUST DIDNT CARE ABOUT HIM no actually just reading this post over again im getting angry

1) youre stupid youre seriously stupid they were never going to let him stay with big mom as you would know if you read the comic with your eyes open and he literally told them its fine ill be fine let me handle it not to even mention that robin and usopps situations were like completely different 2) DID YOU READ THE SCENE. DID YOU READ THE SCENE. DID YOU READ THE SCENE WITH YOUR EYES OPEN. NO WORDS. FLABBERGASTED. 3) youve gotta be kidding me sanji also refers to them as his family as an identifier 4) did you read the comic with your eyes open. do you remember the context in which any of this was taking place. did you forget chiffons existence? 5) DID YOU READ THE SCENE WITH YOUR EYES OPEN. DID YOU READ THE SCENE WITH YOUR EYES OPEN 6) ill give you this one at least 7) "none of that for sanji" DID YOU READ WHOLE CAKE ISLAND. DID YOU READ WHOLE CAKE ISLAND THE ARC. DID YOU READ IT. BECAUSE IM REALLY NOT SURE YOU DID

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

well my first move in any fandom is always to block every single ship tag for my favorite character with the exception of maybe like 1 or 2 but for the brief stint that i did not. ok because i havent actually seen any obikk shippers outside of scrolling on japanese twitter i just know theyre out there and rampant but the irukk shippers via the "posts like this" tab on the righthand side of the screen have assaulted my poor eyes with FAR too much maskless kakashi so for naruto fandom in my personal experience theyre sitting at number 1. also the ship just annoys me on principle because i KNOWWWWWWWWWW i know the kind of people who like this ship even though its srsly the most boring thing to ever exist ever and i cant believe im saying anything mildly positive about this stupid awful ship but at least obito and kakashi have a relationship. if you make it romantic it sucks and youre ruining it but at least its something thats not worlds most bland generic found family fluff like irukk so BORINGGGGGGGGG ITS SOOOOOO BORRINGGGGGGGGG and you know exactly the people who are like "omg..... my soft uwu gay beans.... KYAAAA!!!!!" eat this up. of course not to say that the obito/kakashi people arent the exact same im sure they completely erase their canon dynamic to make it this as well but since i havent been subjected to it and god willing i never will be i cant speak of it

14. that one thing you see in fics all the time

i srsly spent way too long trawling the naruto fanfiction archives and came to the conclusion IM SO SRS SICK OF TIME TRAVEL FICS THIS SUCKSSSSSS NONE OF YOU GUYS ARE DOING ANYHTING INTERESTING WITH ITTTTTTTTT I DONT CAAAAAAAAARE I SO DONT CAAAAAAAAAAAREEEEEEEEEEE. and also just rampant wild mischaracterization everywhere its so bad its so bad like theres this really bizarre situation the naruto fandom has where people are just so so so so so bad at understanding these characters i see so much random nonsense and im like HE WOULDNT SAY THAT SHE WOULDNT DO THAT THIS WOULDNT HAPPENNNNNNNNNNNN GUUUUYSSSSSSSSSSSSS. WHY IS THIS NONSENSE GETTING POPULAR WHO WANTS THIS..........

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

soooooooooo soo many things but one thing that immediately jumps to mind is madara and hashirama and tobirama like i like hashirama and tobirama but not enough to actaulyl think about them and im always so shocked and surprised that people srsly like really love these guys. like for most popular things even if i wildly disagree (cough cough obito cough cough) i can see why people like them because it falls in line with the pattern of fanon behavior but hashirama and tobirama and madara im like SRSLY WHY DO YOU GUYS CARE SO MUCH.... idk maybe theres a filler arc or soemthing ill have to sit through whenever i get back to plowing away at the naruto shippuden filler. maybe one day ill post highlights of my review google doc

#ask game answers #anon #lord.

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robotsafari · 2 months

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i will literally never be over the kh pilot. everyone has already moved on. wow what a cool novelty. sucks that it got canceled. okay im just going to never think about this ever again lalala~ (or its weird. or the art is bad. or its got too many inaccuracies. whatever.)

but me? no. im insane. this thing is too insane and amazing to just end the conversation about it. i will always think about this thing. i will always think about the massive loss the kh community never even knew they had until recently.

while i will never know what the full creative vision was. this pilot tells us that THEY. WERE. COOKING. they lean into the fact that sora is just a kid, (SOME FANS FORGET THIS) and he now faces this burden of being a hero when all he really wants is to see his friends again. the !! even though its just a pilot and riku was probably put in agrabah just so they can introduce him to the audience. i would’ve LOVED more riku encounters. traverse town, neverland and monstro were great. but in my opinion? not enough! though the only thing i would fear riku’s more frequent appearances would do is distract from some of the disney stuff (you dont wanna get rid of it. but you dont want it to take over. its a delicate balance) so maybe use him a lil sparingly but god. put him in more situations, okay?

while kairi plays a more proactive role in kh1 and thats fine (shes not useless. i hate when people call her that) i still would’ve LOVED more scenes with her. whether it was in destiny islands or near the end of game. im just liek YES !! you go girl. prolong the heartless sora segment if ya have to. do it for her. it would’ve been fun to see kairi and sora hollow bastion hijinks. waauughh please kairi my good friend kairi. liek. what we’ve seen of kairi in the pilot was already awesome. kh2 hadn’t even come out but the energy has always been there guys. she wants to take an active role and she hates sitting back!! love that the pilot wanted to give you a glimpse of this by having her kick a damn shadow in the faceee!!! you will always be famous forever kairi god bless.

my good friends donald and goofy. wtf did nomura do to you. one liek = preyer for teh toons /silly. yeah so liked how their fighting was actually toony in the pilot. goofy literally beating all the heartless while knocked out and donald getting messed with by a shadow like a typical donald short is just perfect (THINKS REAL HARD ABOUT HOUSE OF MOUSE.) and ofc!! the heart’s there too!! donald and goofy are so sweet to sora!! THEYRE HIS DADS. they’ve done playful ribbing to sora in the games, and thats not exactly a bad thing.. but sometimes i feel like it gets TOO MUCH. ESPECIALLY IN KH3 GOOD LORD. donald and goofy are sweet. yes donald. hes only gets mad because people mess with him. if you’re nice to him hes super sweet. some playful teasing from donald is okay, but too mean or too much and then its not him. mickey has a pretty minor appearance in kh1 unfortunately but omfg. if i rant about how nomura writes him then we’d be here for a while. the real mickey would not have left aqua in the realm of darkness. just know this, okay? idgaf if you don’t believe me.

it’s confirmed maleficent possessed riku in that scene. you know the one. someone said riku was lying.. NUMBER ONE. his eyes turned completely white and idk about you but thats liek. the textbook sign of being fucking possessed. riku didnt know wtf was going on!! just just grabbed the lamp and suddenly things happened! im sure it was supposed to be interpretive, yes, but the dialogue and visuals suggested possession and also kearsley confirmed it himself on deviantart. (you can search it up yourself) NUMBER TWO. maleficent asks riku if sora believed him. implying that she wants to use riku to manipulate sora. imagine if she used this possession again, in more subtle ways. riku sounds like a sopping wet sad cat too, whatever he does anyway is just so that he can get everything back to normal and undo his mistakes. maleficent doing MORE active villainy would’ve been. SO GOOD. god bless.

oh wait this is the part where i start talking about ansem huh? teeheeeee weheheheee. yo imagine if he was in house of mouse. OKAY THATS NOT A JOKE BUT THIS ISNT SUPPOSED TO BE WHAT THIS PART WAS ABOUT. ERM. i just hope he would’ve still been voiced by billy zane thats all ask for. in this awesome alternate timeline where the cartoon wasn’t cancelled. i think ansem was perfect in kh1 i dont think they needed to add or change anything really.

in short. i have autism. goodnight.

#robo ramble #if the kh cartoon pilot has no fans then im dead.

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the-gayest-sky-kid · 9 months

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8, 16, 19!🫵go!

god actually this is so hard to think abt. i guess thats a good thing bc my mutuals are always so right uhm..... oh wait. traveler lmao. everyones so wrong about the traveler being used and feeling wronged. you all know how i feel about that. and more so about the other characters not being of any assistance and manipulating the traveler. its come to the point that i absolutely CANNOT click on any traveler reaction video because i fear that horrendous take

i also just kind of disagree with how everyones accepted the gods had a hand in khaenri'ah. like i fully believe that was more so on celestia or something higher, because no one except maybe rukkhadevata w/ irminsul so far really seems to have the power to curse the khaenri'ahns on such a level. and rukkha was like. not even there and died????

fanon venti? fanon lyney? just stripping characters of their depth to focus on the façade in general? aufh

also maybe i just spend too much time in the yt bsd community but uhm the way people perceive dazai and mori's relationship. like i cannot fathom why people could assume he was abusing dazai sexually or physically like. idk does it ever feel like people over-exaggerate it to make dazai more sympathetic? because that's what it feels like. does that make sense??? like he's only understandable if he went through some sort of tangible event.

also book dazai headcanons. like look its a fine HEADCANON but personally it irks me because the whole point is he is and has always been human. hes not LITERALLY 'no longer human' hes just an actual normal guy and fucked up about it. gets me annoyed

can i just say dazai and move on hdhdhsjaja but honestly like mori. like yeah he sucks. piece of shit. but also hes just kinda funny. flop fail king or whatever. RIP

also rimbaud ←french

#caps cw #swearing cw #longer post #aethers asks #like what am i supposed to do NOT look lustfully at a man with long hair and a corset #anyway yeah #also gacha vid specific nitpick people always make chuuya shocked over the old boss #like bestie he knew the rumours this is just confirmation #the only possibly shocking thing is dazai being there but even then i dont think it'd amount to visible wide eyes

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leejihoonownsmyheart · 7 months

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WOOZI LIKES SEX SONGS??? WAIT WHEN WAS THIS AND HOW DID I MISS IT...and you're right he's so good at writing self confident songs wtf genius god of music woozi

OH... IT'S OKAY!! YOU'RE NOT A FRAUD YOU'RE JUST...AN IMAGINER.... WE DO NOT JUDGE AROUND HERE, ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU'RE AWESOME

omg okay choose the venue brie 🙄🙄🙄

UR RIGHJT 20s SLANG IS SO FUNNY...giggle juice reminds me of that meme that goes 'the bob got me crunk' IDK IF YOU'VE SEEN IT BUT THAT'S GIGGLE JUICE

OH MY GOD I DIDN'T KNOW GALLAGHER GIRLS IS A BOOK WHOOPS...it sounds so interesting tho??? i'm a sucker for spy books tbh...and who's zachary goode??? tell me more!! ALSO TELL ME ABOUT THE OC NICK. WHAT'S HE LIKE

ALSO WHERE CAN I WATCH DOCTOR WHO AND SUPERNATURAL??? IF THEY'RE GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU TO HYPERFIXATE ON THOSE SHOWS, THEN THEY'RE GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME

you like requests that are different?? whoops...sorry i just gave you something really generic...but i will keep that in mind!! i will think about asks that will lead to a relationship because that's actually the best ending hands down

I POSTED MY BEST FRIEND ON MY STORY (a guy) AND HE LEFT ME ON DELIVERED LMAOOOOOO WHY IS HE LIKE THIS?? (i might block him, thank you btw...) (treat you better plays in the background)

why is it fair for your friends to be mad at you??? not to pry but like can't you choose who you want to be friends with ?😭 don't get sick thinking about it wtf you deserve better

NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR GOING OFF ABOUT HTINGS THAT YOU LIKE??? I'LL GLADLY LISTEN <3

-🫨 anon

I keep a watchful eye of his spotify playlist…. Nasty by Arianna grande PLUS HE LIKES BRUNO MARS AND JUSTIN BIEBER and he used to really like fine by me by chris brown (he was jamming to it in a very old video) and while i digress the majority of these are kinda baby sex songs THEY ARE STILL SEX SONGS

AN IMAGINER 🥹

This is kinda lame but i’ve always kinda adored a forest venue kinda like in twilight i guess 😭 Imagine it.. a wedding, in the snow... bridesmaids in like sage and blush colors IT SEEMS MAGICAL

I LOOKED UP THE MEME AND I AM LAUGHING SO HARD THATS THE GIGGLE JUICE!!!!!!!

I DONT THINK ITS A SUPER POPULAR BOOK SERIES MOST PEOPLE I KNOW DON'T KNOW THE SERIES

Zachary Goode is one of the boys that goes to Blackthorne Academy and HE IS LITERALLY SO HOT the first time they meet HE OUT SPIES HER which is CRAZY if you read the first book because she is the best spy at Gallagher academy. i don't remember too much about him but he is a huge flirt and in the second book (when we meet him) he is just so respectful of her and obsessed with her.... He's perfect PERFECT.

YOU CAN WATCH DOCTOR WHO ON I BELIEVE HBO MAX they took it off netflix a few years ago... like what the fuck... AND YOU CAN WATCH SUPERNATURAL ON NETFLIX STILL. I miss that show, they're doing a con right now somewhere in... england I think I saw and I'm so jealous...

ALSO SHUSH. THAT WAS A PERFECT AMAZING IDEA AND YOU HAVE A PERFECT SEXY BRAIN I LOVE IT

HE LEFT YOU ON DELIVERED?! THATS SO ANNOYING you should be able to post your best friend in peace... I am very excited about this update by the way... I would live and die for every tiny detail about your love life so whenever you want to tell someone about it :))) it could be me :))) ^.^

ALRIGHT ILL GIVE YOU THE WHOLE TLDR this started when my friends moved to mornings. The two people I am closest to at work are my friends Sophia and Rachel and they are both directors at my store while I am just a manager. So ALREADY I'm jealous because they get to go to all these director's meetings together, and then they both move to mornings and not only does that suck because they get to see each other all the time and I see them maybe twice a week BUT THEY LEFT ME WITH ALL THE GUY MANAGERS So one of the guy managers I have spoken of before is Ben. And he is the one that I now work with the most. I used to be kinda close with him while he was dating one of the other managers but we kinda waned out of friendship after something happened on one of my leading shifts (it was not deep.)

We will remember Ben as the Capricorn I work with who broke up with his girlfriend because of a conversation he had with our boss about how she is not the kind of girl he wants to spend the rest of his life with (as she had been going to parties a lot???) and then he broke up with her at work right after her shift and as he started his and then he had sexual relations with a FRESHLY 18-year-old girl that he had been doing one-on-ones with for work while he was still sleeping with his now ex-girlfriend and she found out because she went through his watch text messages at work

DRAMA RIGHT AND I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, brie he is a terrible person

mhm. So. he is a pretty good friend to have. He is very funny, and is easy to make fun of and he's actually pretty supportive. Working with him all of the time I have gotten closer to him. I used to go to the gym with him and my other coworker Blake but when all the aforementioned stuff happened I stopped. Anyways we all started seeing each other at the gym again and THEN my coworkers Nam and Blake moved to the same apartment 'neighborhood' as me. I joked with them that I would be at their apartment all the time cause we live so close

I've always been kinda friends with Nam since we both like anime and we're the same age, but we aren't actually that close. Anyways Blake was having his birthday party at Nam's apartment and I got myself invited because I am annoying :) And the people there are Daniel, Blake, Nam, and Ben. Somehow, that turned into this group of people hanging out EVERY tuesday. I left my sweatshirt and Nam's apartment on Blake's birthday and so everytime Nam saw me he would loudly be like WHEN ARE YOU COMING BACK TO GET YOUR SWEATSHIRT (as if we had fucked and I like it there... humiliating) so I start getting invited to hang out with the group which has extended to adding Minnie, Cassidy, my friend Justin, my coworker Aaron and his friend Kellen.

This is a WEIRD group of people and my friend Rachel does get jealous pretty easily. They both HEAVILY judge me for my friendship with Ben (fair) and they really judged me when I told them about the hangout so I didn't show up like two weeks in a row but for some reason they always text me and call me if I don't show up so I've started going anyways

Rachel doesn't react to my bereals if Ben is in them

So Rachel had taken over the schedule and on the very few times that I got to see her I would joke that she purposely moved herself to mornings cause she doesn't want to work with me. Anyways I am mean when I joke. I know this. I tell people this because I'm really insecure about it because I'm so "nice" all the time no one believes me and then I hurt someone's feelings and I want to cry. So anyways she started crying because of these jokes and she said she felt like I was mad at her.

I wasn't but I also was a little because also we were supposed to hang out with some other friends Emilee, and Chelsea and my friend Dawn and Emilee said she couldn't hangout that day and they planned to hang out then anyways without even trying to find a different day that would work. That's shitty. And then she said that she just really wanted to hammer down a day because she had been trying to plan this since august but like that was just bullshit it was the ONE day Emilee couldn't hang out she just didn't try hard enough and didn't even care that she was leaving Emilee out of it.

SO I was really stressed cause I didn't know how to tell them I thought that was really shitty. And also during ALL of this I am really really depressed. I don't want to talk to anyone, every single shift I worked I would cry because it was so hard and then I ran out of my anxiety meds so I was having panic attacks every single shift.

Anyways Rachel tells me I'm mean, she cries, I cry and then try to ice them out because I don't want to cry and make it all about myself. I have a cute breakdown.

It's really confusing to have this weird group of friends who really want to hang out with me and then Rachel and Sophia who want to hang out with me but also know that Rachel is mad at me. And it's really stressful to remember that if I talk about the people I am hanging out with the most and who seem to want to talk to me the most then my other friends will be mad at me. But if I don't hang out with that weird group of friends I will be so lonely because the only other person that I want to talk to all the time is busy and I am definitely smothering them cause I'm so fucking annoying

So, also I have no one to talk to about work. Rachel and Sophia don't work with the people I work with. I complain about everything if I can and also when I complain about things that Ben do they immediately get him in trouble for it by dragging our store operator into things when they aren't that serious and I am already dogging on him for it so now it's like if I complain about ben it gets back to him and one of these days he is going to be mad at me for it

I always say I can't complain about things because there are always consequences so I stopped complaining about things at work and Rachel and Sophia get mad at me for not talking about work things because we basically don't talk like at all.

However case and point, I told them ages ago that I wanted to learn interviews and they pretended to be excited about it and I mentioned it to them more than once and then a month later they are training James. Not me. So I ask Rachel oh is James learning interviews as if I didn't want to immediately start sobbing upon seeing it. And she immediately said some shit about brittni (our bosses wife) wanting to make sure I wasn't too stressed with school. I ASKED TO LEARN INTERVIEWS. WHY WOULD I ASK IF I WOULD BE TOO STRESSED ABOUT IT BECAUSE OF SCHOOL.

so I complain about it in passing to Blake and my boss over hears that I am upset about something but I don't tell him because I am being a baby right. Well my boss follows up with blake and blake tells him the truth and then my boss thinks that I am upset at him over it. Which I'm not. my boss didn't know I wanted to do interviews. So after our cute little "you should have asked me" chat I cried and then because of that I think rachel got in trouble because I immediately got scheduled to learn interviews.

I DONT WANT TO DO IT NOW. I complained and now everyone things I'm a fucking cry baby. which I am.

and i just. am so greatful for the friends I have but I'm miserable everyday and people are mad at me cause I don't talk about my feelings anymore and I don't even know what they think I just can;t do anything without upsetting anyone.

I don't know. I just really need a therapist but no one will get back to me so I'm just stuck with a dumb psychiatrist who things higher doses of sedative medicine will cure my anxiety and thus minimalize my depression. Whatever. I just hate being a cry baby and being so mad at myself for being a cry baby and then having people tell me how nice and great I am, like I'm not you know what i mean? AND YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN narcissist. Oh boohoo a bunch of people want your attention and want to hang out with you that's so hard. And then on top of that I have to reject a 32-year-old anime coworker who hasn't even asked me out yet.

AND THAT IS WHY IT IS FAIR THEY ARE MAD AT ME and why I should choose not to be friends with my weird group of friends and why I am stressed about it every day sigh

ALSO PRY AWAY again I am such a baby narcissist I love talking about myself sigh

#You can ignore the extremely long deep dive of my social life I think I went overboard but I literally can't tell a story and make it #genuinely brief #a story about going downstairs to get mail can be a ten minute story would you believe #i am. Crazy #IN A GOOD WAY #since you'll see this when you wake up I HOPE YOU SLEPT WELL #also you know those people who like... get tired of people and you know that one day they will get tired of you #sigh.#i just want to talk to them all the time every day but I don't think they feel the same anymore and it hurts.

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wilbur-sloot · 1 year

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IF WILBUR WAS UR BF

a/n there is some angry wilbur :(

tw:against and sl*t is used in this

he would let you join ALL of his streams besides mcc because you would most likely distract him but other than thats you are pretty much like his co-host.

his chat adores you. they love you so much and if there is anything that is negative he would get so pissed that it scared you a little bit

he would love to have movie streams with you. like yall would just record yourselves watchjng movies and his chat would love it when you guys cuddled but not all, because eww pda

he would let you come to lovejoy practise. which means you get to hang out with tubbo and tommy for a day! you and tommy where like brother and sister you guys would fight constantly but like a good type of fighting

(idk how to explain it but yea).

you and tubbo had more of a friendlier friendship. yall would just play around all day and have fun. it was like you were there.

when wilbur wasnt working all his attention would be on you. you guys would cuddle constantly. and you were fine with it. but you also didnt like that you guys could be cuddling but then he has to go to work.

like there was this one time where you and wilbur were watching a movie together and it was like ‘your movie’ you guys would also cuddle during the movie.

then wilbur gets a call. “hello?” he says answering the phone there was a few ‘mhms’ and ‘oks’ then he hung up tbe phone and got up.

“im going to the usa” he says “what when i asked if you wanted to go to visit my family you said no!” you said angrily.

“i know but babe thjs is foe my job!” he said

“so ehat is your job more important than your partner?” you asked

“what no ofc not.” he said

“whatever man have fun in the states.” you said getting up to go pack your bags

“sweetie you arnt coming with me” wilbur said

“breaks almost over which means im going tk move back tk my dorm room but for know im going to go stay with my friend so im not lonely.” you said.

“what who are you going ti stay with?” wilbur asked

“his name is eddie” you said “no! no! i do not want you staying with a boy!” he exclaimed

“well that sucks because you cant stop me when you are working! plus it should only be fair that if you get to hang out with your friends so do i” you said

“but its not like im hanging out with-” wilbur started but you cut him off

“not like you hang out with any other girls? what about niki you guys are literally best friends!” you said “plus arnt you going to like vidicon or something?” you asked

“yeah i am” he said “so your going to be around a shit ton of people. how can i know your not cheating me, oh wait theres this thing called trust!” you said.

“babe i- fine go be a slut!” he yelled at you. he really thinks your a slut? y

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be-good-to-bugs · 7 months

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why havent i been talking to the much much cooler and better older sister who is a furry and super nice and fun to talk to and cares about my opinions and feelings instead of the one who cant respect boundaries and makes me feel like a mistake and doesnt care abt how i feel

#the bin #shes also the only normal person in my family #and when i say normal i mean it in a treats other people with respect way not in a societally normal way #cause she the least 'normal' of my family in that way. which is a good thing. be a freak. autism makes u cooler by default #idk. she sthe only person who i feel like actually cares about me and my opinion and wants to hear what i have to say and views me right #i wish we talked more when i was younger. shes so nice. i hope when i move we can houngout together more and maybe watch some movies #and talk abt stuff or smth. we r probably gonna play some games together soon which is nice #i miss her. i think i can also talk to her abt how our other sister kinda sucks. i know she views her pretty highly or at least used to but #i still think i can. i dont think itll make her uncomfortable.#ive been looking over the past years with my other sister and they havent really been any good mostly #ive just been so isolated and sad that it was better than nothing but its past that point now #if id had other people to talk to then i wouodnt have soent so much time with someone making me feel worse #i also think shes just made me a worse person overall. more judgemental. the past year ive become very against that trying hard to not #and she gets very upset with me when im like hey. yknow. id rather assume the best of random strangers not doing anything that bad #i dont wanna assume everyone is an inconsiderate asshole because they arent. life circumstances we dont know about could be #the reason for this honestly pretty mild inconvenience. if u wanna think otherwise then thats fine but dont day it around me #idk. im tired of it. im still super sad but ive become a much more bright and hopeful person because im trying to be #it actually sucks to view the whole world as horrible and everyone around you ass horrible #idk. maybe i can get my other sister to do the fun stuff with me i dont like doing alone #cause it makes me unbelievably sad to realize i dont have anyone to ask anymore at all. period. but maybe it doesnt have to be that way

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guideaus · 1 year

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tristamp ep 10 thoughts

zazie is info dumping again

idk if the orange writers think this makes sense, or maybe its wrong of me to use irl logic, but vegetation would not replace a magical resource that gives u water, electricity, etc., i think at best the air would get better lol

i dont know why conrad is info dumping either lmao

i cant say i like july's generic cyberpunk vibe. ik i saw a lot of ppl after tristamp wonder how anyone can even build anything in this world, and then tristamp does this with july lol

vash's sneeze was funny to me

vash is spider-man now fhdfjdsfds??? his flimsy little arm looks like it wouldve broke w 2 ppl

i just think its crazy they have a character finally say smth significant to vash and its another faceless goon

vash does not fucking respond to anything in this series

and that scene somehow felt like nothing

conrad's operation room has got some violations

and him just being like "yes, and here's where i do my experiments..." is so funny

i HATE eg mine being included. originally before any tristamp nonsense, i was like "hmm, wonder if knives shared some tech w his guns" but here eg mine apparently being associated with them... when knives just kills him. it makes no sense 😭😭

AND WASNT CONRAD JUST SHOWN TO APOLOGIZE TO KNIVES IN THE LAST EP??? in tristamp the plants arent really human (in the way that theyre probably fucking aliens or some shit 100%, not like in trimax where theyre experimented on humans to become something more, but thats how i always interpreted it), but even still why would he keep doing it lmao. "sorry, we're terrible" *keeps experimenting but in a slightly different way* ???

if he wants humans to basically become independant plants, wouldnt that be helping humanity in a way, why would knives allow that. i might be basing this on trimax's knives, but still. i think tristamp knives still hates people right? i dont think he'd be like "oh, so you're a plant now? sure, thats fine, whatever."

roberto adding to the inexplicable Perception, too, i see

i think it kinda sucks that tristamp kinda connects all the antagonists? EoM and Knives' gang. i think Livio and Chapel indirectly work for knives, but through Legato's commands, but they dont really have a shared goal? while in tristamp it feels direct... if that makes sense, idk

ww is still an asshole :(

vash's body looks weird. does meat look like that?? is that normal?? and wtf is the random lines and shit. i feel like im watching cyberpunk edgerunners

not to be one of those ppl who blame everything on the mcu, but why tf is this scene so dark. cant see shit

vash's scars revelation here is also just strange in general. in the manga it was a good early prompt into vash's issues, meryl & milly see and meryl insists he should retire from his life, and vash says he cant bc of his bro, but vash is also a pacifist so thats his price, this moves milly and meryl. while here its just... idk. feels random, and another excuse for tsundere ww to call out passive vash

conrad being fucking mad scientist AGAIN is so funny. he looks like he turned evil here. yesterday i had a post cooking up abt him and knives' relationship, but this just feels funny. how is knives allowing him to live here, even if its with the humans

cocoon knives back at the piano

tree. who knows if it means anything or if its like the previous imagery used so far

some cute elf bitches

expecting me to believe knives would willingly help him experiment on anything is just... knives i think is a hiuge hypocrite, judgemental, and reactive and those are flaws i like about his character, i dont think he'd allow this LMAO

are they gonna kill vash

is conrad transphobic here or is elendira's gender changed? and was she like. fake napping just to wake up to be like "um, who are you calling poor" and attack or fjsdhsjds

i dont even get what theyre pushing. tristamp LOVES having characters throw "monster" around, but then also elendira is attacking while saying they judge her. what theme is being pushed lol. and why is she even attacking

i forgot to say, but i hate what they did to elendira, btw.

ROBERTO IS NOW DYIGN FHSDJSKKJDS no one saw him injured... vash just waved their asses off fshdjsas???

i think her expressions are good there

i cannot say how much i disagree with wolfwood's initial ideals being overlayed with meryl's apparent newfound determination in response to her senior dying. ww's "you need to kill to survive" is his own lie to himself to cope with being a child soldier, called out by vash in the beginning of trimax and serves as character development he moves on from. having meryl take that as a lesson is incredibly strange. i strongly disagree with that take. her just going to a shooting range and maybe learning the basics would arguably be more significant for her lmao

tristamp just does not do a good job w vashwood's relationship. at all. if i just saw this i'd roll my eyes at shippers. theres nothing there

why did knives ask why he's there. isnt ww implied at least to have brought him there on orders from him

where are zazie and legato btw

did conrad just fucking leave to his office lmao. "oh no the people i was info dumping to are getting attacked by elendira! ...eh"

is that tesla??

whys his knife got an eyeball. whose is it

CONRAD IS BEGGING FOR FORGIVENESS AGAIN IN THIS SCENE. DOES KNIVES KNOW ABOUT TESLA?? HOW IS CONRAD STILL DOING THIS FJHSDJDS

tristamp loves just throwing around aspects of catholicism without actually... fitting it in. like they just use it when its convenient, eps having antagonists preach it

the piano activated floor trap is funny

idk what knives could be referring to, so we'll see i guess

#personal #trigun stampede spoilers

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nickeverdeen · 1 year

Note

Nickname: Anni or Annie

Fandom: Hunger Games! (please, tysm!)

Sexuality: Straight.....I think- (so male match ig)

Zodiac signs: Leo sun, Aries moon, Leo rising

Personality type: Entp

Pronouns: She/her

So lets see here a little bit about my appearance.....I am very petite and I won't lie i'm about 5'3.....maybe 5'4 on a good day. I also have thick brown hair that goes down to lower mid back and if you are ever around me you'll hear me get frustrated with my hair and i'll say something like "I AM GOING TO CUT OFF ALL OF MY HAIR, I SWEAR!" but for now I am keeping it how it is lmao. I also have brown eyes and lots of freckles on my face, my freckles are one of my most liked features about myself lol. Lastly for my style.....I have none. I like Adidas so I'll wear Adidas jackets and sporty stuff and besides that I just wear normal t-shirts and what not lol. Although flannels....absolutely lovely. I love flannels and combat boots....

My personality can be a bit rocky at first. Sometimes I just won't like someone for no reason, I can't explain why but I just won't like them idk. But overall i'm an extrovert, I just dislike people sometimes lmao but nonetheless my social skills are fine and I make new friends ridiculously easy. I do have a resting bitch face though so it does make people nervous when first meeting me but I promise I am not that bad.

When you really get down to who I actually am I am a big asshole who just happens to be a big goofball as well. I am extremely sarcastic, almost to a fault and I will sometimes rag on people in a teasing way. I also do dumb stuff like climbing and falling out of trees, tripping over air, falling up the stairs, etc. Also being reckless doesn't help either. But I have a very strong "I don't care" attitude and I am very blunt and brash when I get angry or in general sometimes, I also struggle with emotions like I hate talking about feelings so I suck at that stuff. But seriously I cannot talk about my feelings like at all, i'll kinda hold it all in and being vulnerable or talking about emotions make me anxious and super uncomfortable. BUT besides that I am very bold and prideful but I can be very caring when I want to be around certain people and I'd do anything for my friends and people I'm close to.

Weird things about me: I've grown up in the south all my life so sometimes when I talk a few words they'll come out sounding WAYYY more country and southern then I wanted, I don't have an accent but sometimes my words just come out that way. I also love the smell of cigarette smoke....let me explain. When I was a kid my parents smoked a lot and I was used to smelling it and now it reminds me of home and is sort of comforting. I also have lots of intrusive thoughts lol so sometimes i'll just be sitting there quietly and I'll just start laughing like a weirdo......i'm a big dork honestly. I also do that weird thing where i'm sitting down and I'll just be bouncing my leg....idk why I do it....I just do....and I also run my fingers through my hair a lot, thats why its always messy. Sometimes when i'm bored I space out and i'll chew on my lip or the side of gum...I need to stop I know but its hard to....

Things I like: I love swimming (I was on a swim team for about 10 years), I love horror movies, I like rain and the sounds of thunderstorms because its calming to me, I also love the smell of rain, I like cloudy days, cooking, listening to 90's rock or any like grunge or alt, My favorite bands are Bush, Audioslave, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Lincoln Park, Pearl jam, Deftones but i'm pretty open to anything, I also have a soft spot for some good 80's rock too......I started taking martial arts so hehe that's kinda cool...I can do cool body locks and I know a lot of good pressure points to use against someone, I can also throw people ober my shoulder so that's cool

Things I dislike: Spiders.......I will scream if I see a spider....like seriously I will move to the moon if one touches me. I also tend to be more irritable around people lately so I dislike people right now......

(I apologize if this is super long...I can shorten it if you'd like-)

No need to shorten it and thanks 🫶

Also may I ask what type of material arts are you doing?

————————————————————

Your Hunger Games match is…

Gale Hawthrone

(No hate on him here please)

Jokes about how short you are and how tall he is

(You ain’t short, trust me)

He is pretty introverted so people seeing him date an extrovert is a suprise

He doesn’t really care what others think, though

Gale at first thought he did something weong when he saw your resting face

Jokes like “you can be scary” or “remind me not to get on your bad side”

Laughs at you when tripping over an air or falling up the stairs plus falling down on trees

Helps you and makes sure you’re okay, though

Teases you about it later 100%

Gale isn’t that type of a person to talk about feelings in general

Jokes about the fact that your words sound very country and southern

Runs his own hand through your hair

Compliments your franckless on your face

There aren’t many places where to swim in District 12 so he’d try to find some river at least

Watches the rain with you

Gale isn’t a big fan of horror movies so he probably wouldn’t want to watch them with you

But he does like your music taste

Plays your favourite songs when you’re home alone

Says how cool it is that you know material arts

Maybe feel free to teach him some of it

Teases you about your arachnophobia

(Fear of spiders)

Sometimes like a kid he’d bring it up to you

Constant flirting

Most of the girls in the District are very jealous that you get to date the hottest boy that in the District is

(Sorry Peeta)

Random rambeling about leaving the District and about the future

Hunting with him may be hell ‘cause of his taunting and teasing about it (not in a bad way)

Gale can’t hunt himself so you can tease him about that

Ruffles your hair sometimes to annoy you or just for fun

He is a very protective boyfriend

Treats you like his best friend, but also like his whole world

Hopes you understand his actions and meanings behind them

Beats up Peacekeepers to just keep you safe

Gale is willing to die for you or get tortured

#request #headcanons #matchups #the hunger games #gale hawthorne #galehawthronexreader #galexreader #thg x reader #thg gale

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foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland · 10 months

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Ever keep urself awake at night thinking of what would happen if ur house bruned down and what ud be abke to save and all the things thatd be lost. Like im genuinely getting fucking upset about this hypothetical universe where all my compyter files are gone, all my childhood diaries are gone, every drawing ive ever made is gone, all the clothes asides from what im wearing right now which is my fucking pajamas are gone, and the things id probably save r just my phone n my camera bc theyre light and expensive and hold a lotta shit on them. And maybe my sketchbook if i had time. But like dude ik realistically not everything would be lost but a damn good chunk of it would be and that just makes me so upset 2 thjnk abt bc like. Idk. I think it sucks bc bein a teenager is like. My life is my room. It is the one safe place in the entirety of the world. Everythjng that matters to me is here asides from my cat. So like. Losing my room would be like losing everything because i have nothing else. And because literally like all my worldly possessions are here. Anyways im anxious abt that now bc i was playing it out in my head and my biggest fear would be if i was jn a situation where i was sleeping naked bc it was so hot and i spent too much time trying to find clothes so i didnt run outside naked and couldnt even save my phone. Like id be able to get over losing most other yhings but my phone literally holds my fucking memories and without it i would literally forget so much of my life bc i have such a godawful memory. Like i need its calendar and i need the gallery and i need the messages. And yea. But shit dude. Id lose the diary i wrote when i was 8 and all the pictures ive drawn ever since i moved into this room when i was like 9 and all the books i have and all my sketches and my computer with all my files and my art tablet with the past few years worth of art and my clothes which mean so fuckin much to me like god if i cant dress comfortabky i am just fucking Not A Person and my fucking camera with all mt photos shit dude and if i loet my phone thats so many memories gone and so many ways to remember people i dont talk to anymore and years and years of cat photos gone and shit dude. Ok i think making a post has made me feel a bit better tho bc theres now that little voice in my head goin like What the fuck nobody thinks like this what r u on abt ur fine why would ur house burn down now when it hasnt for the past like fucking idk 18+ years ny parents have owned it

#night thoughts

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guts-blood-n-screamzz · 2 years

Note

Billy, Eddie, or Steve......you know what to do.

Nickname: Anni or Annie

Zodiac signs: Leo sun, Aries moon, Leo rising

Personality type: Entp

Pronouns: She/her

Things I like: I love swimming (I was on a swim team for about 10 years), I love horror movies, I like rain and the sounds of thunderstorms because its calming to me, I also love the smell of rain, I like cloudy days, cooking, listening to 90's rock or any like grunge or alt, My favorite bands are Bush, Audioslave, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Lincoln Park, Pearl jam, Deftones but i'm pretty open to anything. I also started taking martial arts so hehe that's kinda cool...I can do cool body locks and I know a lot of good pressure points to use against someone....also learning how to throw someone over my shoulder at the moment so don't fuck with me.

> a/n ; sorry that this is so short, im getting used to writing again :sob:

> trigger warnings ; n/a

__________________

< billy would absolutely love man handling you. He could easily pick you up and throw you over his shoulder.

< I feel like he's really good at doing hair so I feel like if you really wanted to he would cut your hair for you.. but be warned he is pretty rough while doing so.

< You'd honestly probably out-asshole him. Which would peak his interest in you even more. There is probably a point where you just want him to leave you alone but he doesn't.

< I feel like you'd definitely have to put him in his place a few times, but like the dog he is. You could train him to listen to you instead of being completely wild. Just don't expect to entirely tame him ;)

< He'd definitely make fun of how you talk, even jokes about you having an accent.

< When a situation comes up with a spider, he'll laugh at you and then kill it. He thinks it's hilarious how you're so afraid of them.

runner up.... eddie

#guts blood n screamzz #matchup #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove #stranger things

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aestheticquote · 2 years

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Hi! Thank you so much for doing this with me! I'm super excited! Anyways heres my info!

Nickname: Anni or Annie

Zodiac signs: Leo sun, Aries moon, Leo rising

Personality type: Entp

Pronouns: She/her

Things I like: I love swimming (I was on a swim team for about 10 years), I love horror movies, I like rain and the sounds of thunderstorms because its calming to me, I also love the smell of rain, I like cloudy days, cooking, listening to 90's rock or any like grunge or alt, My favorite bands are Bush, Audioslave, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Lincoln Park, Pearl jam, Deftones but i'm pretty open to anything, I also have a soft spot for some good 80's rock too......I started taking martial arts so hehe that's kinda cool...I can do cool body locks and I know a lot of good pressure points to use against someone....also learning how to throw someone over my shoulder at the moment so don't mess with me!

Hiii I’m super happy we get to do this !!

For stranger things, I ship you with…

Steve Harrington!

• Steve absolutely takes you on swimming dates. He also loves to swim, and has been doing it for a long time. During summer he’ll pick you up from you house, and take you to some sort of lake where you guys can splash around and be goofy. After that, he’d take you to grab some food (he pays of course ;)), and then find some lookout where you guys can watch the sunset together and talk. <3

•He kindof likes that you can be irritable towards people you don’t like. He’s always had a hard time with people when he can’t read how they feel about him. He loves how he never has to guess with you, you just tell him. <3

•Steve also hates spiders, but he loves you so much that he will swoop in at any moment and get rid of one for you. <3

• He finds it adorable when you space out. He can just look over at the dazed expression in your eyes, see you absentmindedly chewing on some gum, and he’ll chuckle knowing you’re in a whole different world right now <3

•He’s very patient with any anger you may have. He’ll never force you to talk about it, but he encourages you to. He never judges you when you tell him something that bothers you. He’ll never get mad if you have to scream or cry at him to get it all out. He will always understand, and he just wants you to be happy. <3

I hope you liked this, have an awesome day/night!

Love,

J ❤️❤️❤️

#matchups

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