#az rambles

[tenderflint]

nobody better be posting about the met gala without mentioning the giant pro-palestine demonstration going on outside

#az rambles #palestine #met gala

[azul1462]

Hello everybody uhhhhhh

Share y'all's Five Pebbles designs, I wanna draw something with some Five Pebbles designs

#rain world #iterator #five pebbles #az rambles #very normal about him.......

[iteratorsoffthestring]

[[This blog needs asks]]

#az rambles #ooc talk

[impteas]

I don't do personal posts on here very often, but I finally caved and bought myself a cane. Just kinda weird to finally able to have one despite needing some sort of mobility aid for years

#az rambles #it's terrifying to think about using it #excited tho

[az-cain]

way too much detail about my hcs for marc’s appearance as he wishes them to be

the reason i think marc wants a military cut is bc even in the hospital/on the boat when he was separated from steven and jake his hair was slicked so it looked shorter. this wasn’t because he was a psych ward patient and was therefore well cared for— we saw layla with crazy hair and mad eyes— but because he was closer to what he wanted to be. steven had his magen david necklace on because that was how he pictured himself!! messy hair and religious!! marc, though he wore it while he was alive, didn’t have the magen david. so the hair is how he pictures himself too,, within the constraints of the actor.

also marc was a marine!!!!! i know multiple people who still care for themselves as though they are in the military. especially marines. i also feel like marc would be like this because he still seems very caught up in his past, comforted by his abilities, he seems like he would be at home in the stability and routine of staying as he was when he was in the profession he felt to be most himself (though that’s really sad, that he thinks he’s always been and always will be a killer… thats a whole other rant).

i also think that marc feels weak and helpless sometimes, and being raised a) in midwest america and b) jewish (assuming it’s anything like christianity), he likely has a lot of internalized views about gender roles. doesn’t mean he agrees, but you can have something internalized without projecting that onto other people (think internalized homophobia). that’s why i think he’d want a beard. beards make people look more masculine in the traditional sense, and marc wants to be seen as capable and to be feared. he wants to stop being hurt and feeling helpless. and he thinks the best way to do that is to make others afraid to hurt him and his loved ones. also on the surface level he just looks good w one?? and knows it??

i just think he wants short hair and a beard. im just tryna picture marc as he pictures himself.

anyway too much detail yall get the point

#az rambles #moon knight #moon knight hcs #marc spector #marc spector hcs

[darkchocoposting]

//THIS IS WHAT YOU WERE PLANNING WHEN I ASKED ABOUT ELDERTICH COOKIE... YOU LITTLE *GRIPS BY NECK* /j //

[[I've posted about Grudge Knight a few times over on my main :)

Anyways, yes. Eldritch and Grudge Knight have ties :)]]

#ask response #az rambles #grudge knight! event

[dabs-into-oblivion]

some things fucking suck for me rn. mainly one thing. the others have been resolved as far as they can be atm.

but, okay, so.

someone doesn't want to be in my life? good, actually. get out. i don't want to spend time on you if you're not in.

this doesn't mean i'm not sad, and it doesn't mean i don't give a shit about people even if they don't care about me, but.

man, why would i want someone around who i'm having to convince to stay, when i already have people who don't need convincing?

the immediate availability of this perspective (the person in question blocked me Yesterday) is new for me, tbh, and speaks to the nearly six years of work that i've been doing since march 2018.

(what happened in march 2018, you ask? someone left. i was so fucked up about it that i started a blog. i've written multiple songs about this person. she's not solely responsible for my trust issues and fear of abandonment—no one is—but the situation between the two of us contributed significantly.)

but like. that work that i've been doing? i didn't realize how much it had worked.

thank you for showing me that by leaving, genuinely. i don't feel Good about it, exactly, but i feel... Settled. lmao i feel like i skipped the first three stages of grief entirely and am somewhere in between the last two. is that something i should be concerned about? eh, if it is, i'll learn that eventually. doesn't need to be now.

#az talks #az rambles #trust issues #fear of abandonment #trauma #swearing #love #posts into oblivion

[pumpkinvampie]

Ok so I tried to apply for some antidepressants online bc I need something to change in my life. Does anyone know a more affordable website other than For Her? That shit was RIGHT out of my price range and man it makes me so upset. Even without needing insurance, it was still $49 a month D:

#Mental health #Any help or information would help me out tremendously #I just need something to change #I am dying here #az rambles

[avaloniaofficial]

rewatching source for my rewrite and ZAMN they do not give any moments that are sposed to be emotional ANY time at all. just Oh Shit Gotta Go! onto the Next Thing! which i get with time constraints and budget issues and needing to keep things fast paced for the audience and stuff but man. No Consequences or Ramifications??? aside from callbacks to previous events?

#i think one scene specifically got me like man. how are you not traumatized from that. jsut a little? #might end up being a derivative work or something idk #well see #all this happened bc one artist from the soundtrack got reccd to me on spotify and they posted unused tracks from it #and theyre really good!!! #but yea im like i can up the stakes. shake things up. #second arc was my fav i rember. i wanna at least rewrite that #az rambles

[azperja]

I just drank coffee with three shots of espresso i should not be this sleepy wtf

#Has coffee stopped working universally #Please let me know #Az rambles #az needs sleep #But also has a shit ton of things to do

[tenderflint]

i went to saw the musical today and you'll never believe it. my friends adam and amanda were there

#i cheered louder than anyone else in the mf theater when amanda came on #az rambles #saw #saw the musical

[azul1462]

THEY ARE BEING HELD HOSTAGE/J

#az rambles #rain world #iterator #five pebbles #looks to the moon

[iteratorsoffthestring]

[[I may have forgotten about this blog having a buncha asks to be answered. Soooo... heads up, there will be some major design changes when I start answering asks again!]]

#ooc talk #az rambles

[impteas]

There's something so good about getting into something your father is into. I got into comics and its been so nice to pick through his collection of comics I remember reading as a kid.

#az rambles

[misadventures-of-saffron]

[I've been thinking. I should revisit this. Maybe make use this for bits of au lore and headcanons.

I have a lot of rewriting to do.]

#miitopia #misadventures of saffron #az rambles

[darkchocoposting]

your opinon over darkyam and/or darkmilk?, also what's your OTP?

"Wh- huh...? Uhh- Purple Yam, Milk, a-and I are just friends... kind of. Yam is too loud and Milk is kind of like a mediator who keeps us from yelling at each other and fighting."

[[Ooc: this seems like an ask that would've been more fitting to be sent to my main blog, but I'll share my opinion here! I do not ship darkmilk, I just see them as being friends or acquaintances. As for darkyam, with my headcanons it is a hard NO. That relationship would be explosive and would not last long.]]

#ask response #az rambles #chunk of hc lore