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eurydicees · 18 days

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44 for the taylor prompts?

this ask is a YEAR old, it is TWO THIRTY AM, and i FINALLY got an idea that i couldn't get out of my head for it. here are my humble offerings.

the kind of best man who leaves the wedding first

summary: tamaki and haruhi are getting married. kaoru watches over the remnants of something else that used to be. prompt: the ties were black, the lies were white pairings: tamaki suoh/haruhi fujioka, tamaki suoh/kyoya ootori words: 2103 warnings: none

Kaoru hums, running his pen in long, curving, meandering lines across a blank piece of paper. Kyoya is talking to him, or, really, he’s talking at him. Kaoru is very much not listening.

Kyoya has been talking about the same thing for the past two hours—which is two hours worth of talking more than Kaoru really came here to listen to, and two hours more than he had ever expected to come from Kyoya without a breath to pause—and Kaoru would expect to be annoyed, but he’s mostly just tuned him out by now.

The thing is that he can’t really bring himself to be annoyed. Kyoya is just anxious, same as everyone Kaoru spends his time with seems to be these days. To be fair, it’s not like Kaoru himself isn’t also anxious. It’s more that his coping mechanisms for anxiety involve less throwing himself into obsessive planning and organizing and fretting over every detail of every plan, and more taking calming breaths. He’s been in a lot of therapy recently. Him and Hikaru both. He thinks maybe he should recommend someone to Kyoya.

“—and he asked me to be his best man,” Kyoya says. Ah. Finally. The point. Kyoya’s voice turns low, quiet. “I don’t—just—”

“You can’t have expected it to be anyone else,�� Kaoru points out. He lifts his chin from the palm of his hand to look at Kyoya. “You’re not stupid.”

Kyoya sighs, pressing his face into his hands; elbows on the table and hunched over. His voice is muffled when he says, “I expected it. That doesn’t mean I’m ready for it.”

“You’ll be fine,” Kaoru says, rolling his eyes. “You spent three years of high school planning parties on his behalf. You can throw one more.”

“Fuck, I have to plan the bachelor’s party?”

Kaoru frowns at him. “Is that not what you were worried about?”

Kyoya sighs, dropping his hands onto the table and leaning back in his chair. “I was mostly thinking about how terrible Haruhi is at party planning. And how Tamaki will literally do anything to make her dream wedding happen. Even if it’s ridiculous.”

“It’s gonna be terrible,” Kaoru snickers. Which is a little mean, but also. He’s not wrong.

“Supportive,” Kyoya says, rolling his eyes. “And I—forget it.”

Kaoru straightens up, setting the pen down and turning to study Kyoya more closely. “What?”

He and Kyoya have gotten much closer over the years, especially in Kyoya’s third year, when he started training Kaoru to take over his job in the Host Club, and he’s gotten good at reading Kyoya. But this expression is different—he looks contemplative, closed off, unsure, and hidden, all in a way that he hasn’t looked in years.

Kyoya has gotten so much better at the whole friendship and vulnerability thing as time went on—something Kaoru knows can mostly be attributed to Tamaki—but there are still moments when he shuts down. When he reverts back into a shadow more than a star. Those kinds of moments—this kind of moment—only really comes when he’s scared.

“Kyoya—”

“It changes people,” Kyoya says, steadily not looking at Kaoru. He reaches out to pick up the pen Kaoru had been doodling with, and he clicks it open and closed again and again and again. “Marriage, I mean. I saw it with my sister. With Honey. With Mori. It just…it changes people. And relationships. Friendships. They change.”

Kaoru hums. “I suppose.”

“There are just—fuck. I don’t know.” Kyoya stares at the pen, something distant in his gaze. “There were so many times when I thought—”

He cuts himself off again, and Kaoru waits. The way to get Kyoya talking is never to ask him a question. Kyoya blinks twice, and Kaoru stiffens. He’s not sure he knows what to do if Kyoya cries. He had prepared for a lot of things when Kyoya called him that morning, telling him to come over immediately and offering no other explanation, but Kyoya crying at his kitchen table is not one of them.

Kyoya takes a shaky breath and clears his throat. “I don’t know. It’s nothing.”

“It’s clearly not nothing, Kyoya. C’mon. It’s just me.”

Kyoya closes his eyes, tipping his head back to angle his face at the ceiling. Kaoru watches, somewhat helplessly, as Kyoya confesses, “There were so many times when I figured I was going to lose him, and it never truly happened. But now…I think this might really be it.”

“Kyoya…”

Kyoya swallows, looking down and shaking his head a little. “It’s fine. I knew it was going to happen eventually.”

Kaoru is quiet. He watches the now twenty-two year old Kyoya as he starts clicking the pen open and closed again, and he sees Kyoya as he used to be.

Seventeen, in Music Room 3, with Tamaki hooking his chin over Kyoya’s shoulder to look at his laptop screen while they talk about the budget. Haruhi, calling out Tamaki’s name in the distance, asking for a ride home because of the thunderstorm.

Sixteen, the two of them in that same spot, waltzing without music, Tamaki’s hands on Kyoya so tightly it must hurt; the most honest smile that Kaoru has ever seen on him; a moment that no one else was supposed to see.

Fifteen, trailing after Tamaki as Tamaki called the twins each by their name. His hands in his pockets, a book under the hook of his arm. Calling out, “Stop bothering them. Let’s go home, Tamaki.”

And Tamaki—

It dawns on Kaoru, then. “You love him.”

Kyoya clicks the top of the pen so harshly that it gets stuck. He drops the pen on the table. Now, there’s something angry about his expression more than there is anything sad. Like he can’t even be heartbroken because he’s too caught up in being mad at himself for having the feeling in the first place.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell,” Kaoru says softly. “You can talk to me about it.”

At that, Kyoya outright laughs. It’s bitter, and tired. “It’s not a secret, Kaoru. He knows. He’s well aware.”

Kaoru frowns. “Did you tell him?”

Abruptly, Kyoya stands up, the chair legs scraping back with an awful noise. Kyoya runs a hand through his hand, starting to pace around. He looks like he wants to talk, wants to scream something at the top of his lungs, maybe, but doesn’t have the words to explain what he’s feeling.

He makes a frustrated noise and drops his hands to his sides. His back is to Kaoru and his face is to the wall when he finally speaks again.

“We were together,” he says quietly. “Through most of high school.”

Kaoru’s heart lurches into his stomach. “Oh.”

Kyoya shrugs, the movement stiff. “We both knew it couldn’t last. Our families—and then Haruhi—and we wanted at least one of us to get a happy ending.”

“Oh,” Kaoru says again. His tongue is too big for his mouth, his teeth too sharp. He feels like he needs to say something else, but what else is there to say? He doesn’t have the words for this either. “Oh.”

“It’s fine.” Kyoya takes a deep breath, one that echoes around the room. “It’s fine.”

“Is it?”

Kyoya turns around. His face is cold, impassive again. “It is. Don’t—we don’t need to talk about this again.”

“Okay,” Kaoru says quietly.

He looks down at where the pen has rolled onto the scraps of paper Kyoya had been sitting in front of. When Kaoru had come into the kitchen, all of the paper had already been there, but he hadn’t actually looked at any of it before starting to doodle over one.

Now, he pulls a piece of the lined notebook paper towards himself to take a closer look.

“Is this your best man's speech?” Kaoru asks.

Kyoya sighs. “It’s terrible.”

Kaoru reads another few lines. “It could use some editing.”

“I was trying to be funny.”

“Yeah, but you’re not funny.”

“Thanks.”

Kaoru snorts. “This line’s funny.”

Kyoya steps over, leaning over Kaoru’s shoulder to see the line he’s pointing out with his finger. “That one was supposed to be sincere.”

“Yeah, okay,” Kaoru says, sighing. “We’ve got a few months, let’s work on this.”

He and Kyoya spend the next few months working on the speech, amongst other things. By the end of it, Kaoru has memorized it himself, and he could probably give the speech in Kyoya’s stead if Kyoya were to bail at the last minute. But for all that Kaoru can tell Kyoya is hurting over this, he knows Kyoya isn’t going to bail. Kyoya may be hurting, but he’s much too loyal to Tamaki to disappear when Tamaki needs him—the last time Tamaki will need him like this.

The thing is—Kyoya claims to have always known that he and Tamaki wouldn’t have lasted. But Kaoru is sure that doesn’t make it any easier to handle watching the love of your life get married to someone else. It doesn’t make it any easier to deal with watching your best friend walk into someone else’s care.

It’s not like Tamaki is helping make it any easier, either.

He’s as oblivious as ever. With each passing day of wedding planning that Tamaki painfully ropes Kyoya into in an attempt to make it perfect, it’s clear that Tamaki has no idea that Kyoya is still in love with him.

Tamaki asks him for advice on suits and Kyoya’s eyes linger too long and Tamaki just basks in the attention. He makes Kyoya help out with music choices, despite everyone knowing Tamaki is the one with good music taste. Kyoya is with them at almost every planning meeting, and some of it can be reasoned down to not letting the two of them make the decisions, but it also looks like it’s killing Kyoya every time he comes back to report to Kaoru.

“The colors are going to be a kind of blue sea foam and pale pink,” Kyoya says tiredly. “Haruhi wanted green and purple. Tamaki wanted aqua and lavender.”

It’s everything I can never have with anyone, his eyes say. It’s everything I wanted with him.

“Thank fuck you were there,” Kaoru says.

I’m so sorry, his own expression says.

Now that Kaoru knows that the two of them were together, he sees it everywhere. He makes a photo album for Tamaki and Haruhi, and it’s in every photo he can find from high school. He helps Honey with a video reel, and it’s in the way the two of them gravitate towards each other at every opportunity. He writes his own speech, and it’s in every memory he has of the two of them in the same place at the same time.

The day of the wedding comes, and it’s beautiful, and they all give their speeches, and they exchange memories and photos and gifts. Both Tamaki and Haruhi are breathtaking in their suits. Ranka cries. Kaoru cries. Hikaru does too, but he won’t ever admit it, despite the many eyewitnesses.

It’s after the ceremony, when they’re all celebrating at the reception, that Kaoru spots Tamaki going over to Kyoya. Kyoya is nursing a glass of champagne at a table by himself, and Tamaki seems to be trying to convince him to dance.

Tamaki is looking at him pleadingly in that annoyingly convincing way he does and from where Kaoru is standing with Honey and Reiko on the dance floor, it looks like Kyoya is about to give in, in the same way that he always does. Then, before Kyoya can nod and stand and take just one dance with Tamaki, Haruhi comes up to them and wraps a hand around Tamaki’s waist.

It’s not possessive and there’s certainly no malice, because that’s not the kind of person Haruhi is, but the shift in Kyoya’s body language is easy to read even from a distance. Haruhi says something that Kaoru can’t hear, and then she’s stepping back, Tamaki’s hand in hers.

Tamaki smiles at Kyoya, a little sad, and kisses his cheek. It’s a gentle, lingering motion. It must burn. Then he turns and follows Haruhi to go dance as a married couple.

Kaoru is pretty sure he’s the only one watching Kyoya, so he’s the only one who gets to see Kyoya put the tips of his fingers to his cheek. Who gets to see him take a deep breath, and then drop his hand.

And then he’s the only one who notices when Kyoya stands, gathers his suit jacket, places a single envelope on the table, and leaves the wedding early.

#YES THIS IS BASED ON THE SHERLOCK EPISODE SHUT THE FUCK UP. IM REWATCHING.#my writing #ohshc #tamakyo #kyoya ootori #tamaki suoh #kaoru hitachiin #ouran high school host club #ouran host club #kyotama #ootori kyoya #hitachiin kaoru #ouran fanfic #ohshc fanfic #kyouya ootori

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cold-heart-warm-writings · 1 year

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The Host Club members are coming over! Based on the tea I currently have in my tea organizer, here’s what I’m giving each member:

Honey: Bigelow Botanicals Cold Water Infusion blackberry raspberry hibiscus (... that’s an aggressively long title for a tea flavor. also, where tf did this come from. I have one singular crumpled up bag of this... okay. but also it sounds really sweet and fruity and that gives me honey vibes)

Tamaki: Big Heart tea Co Cup of Love nurturing rose (cause Tamaki + roses just makes sense. this is also my favorite comfort tea, and I just like the idea of giving tamaki a mug of genuine love. someone please give him a real hug)

Hikaru: (omitting local tea company name) Red Hot Cinnamon Black (it’s the only loose leaf I actually can be bothered to make because it’s SO GOOD! It has actual cinnamon candies in it and it’s almost... spicy? idk, but it’s really good. And the surprise spicy makes me think of our resident little devil. <3)

Mori: Dynasty Chinese Restaurant Tea, blend of Oolong, Jasmine, and Green tea (this is also random af, but it’s tea I had all the time in China, and maybe it’ll remind Mori of the dojo? And feel calmed? There’s a lot of chaos in the host club, so drink a hot cup of tea, and breathe)

Haruhi: Nordovist Moominmamma’s Magic Potion, Black tea with rhubarb and strawberry flavors (because haruhi is making some real magic potion getting the entire host club addicted to cheap ass commoner coffee. And you know what? Good for them. plus haruhi totally mom’s the host club, and i love them for that)

Kaoru: Nordovist Snufkin’s Adventurer’s Snacks, green tea, pear, and vanilla flavors (cause snufkin looks angsty on the packaging, like it’s him against the world, and kaoru can get that vibe sometimes, especially when he starts to branch off from Hikaru. So here’s a cup of hot tea to aid you in your adventure of self discovery.)

Kyoya: Celestial Seasonings Peppermint herbal tea (i know this tea is the opposite of fancy, and kyoya would probably have one of the highest expectations of fancy teas, but this with a little bit of honey always makes me feel better if im ever feeling sick, plus it helps me with headaches. And i really think kyoya needs something because i bet his stress is destroying his head and his stomach, so please relax, sir.)

#we're really just having a silly goofy fun time okay everyone?#i reorganized m tea organizer and my ~tea station~ and i felt inspired to write based on tea #i love reading this kind of shit so why not write it? plus i havent written for the host club for a while #eh we'll see #:)#ohshc #ouran #ouran host club #ouran high school host club #tamaki suoh #kyoya ootori #kaoru hitachiin #hikaru hitachiin #takashi morinozuka #mitskuni haninozuka #haruhi fujioka #also did not proof read please let me live

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