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tanoraqui · 4 years

Note

I just wanted you to know that I just read all your hellmurder castle 'verse posts and I LOVE THAT AU SO MUCH

what you have to understand about my Hellmurder Castle AU (Homestuck set in the world of Girl Genius, if you haven’t read it) is that it was born specifically from my spite exasperation with all the long, epic AUs about either only the trolls or the trolls + beta kids, with alpha kids appearing as background characters at best and often not at all. Many of these fics are great, and many of them were written or at least planned before the alpha kids even appeared in canon, in which case it’s not the authors’ faults at all. But I LOVE my alpha kids, and Roxy may be my favorite and Dirk is a delight, but I was ALSO tired to tears of how even in fics featuring the alpha kids, it was almost always Derse-heavy.

So I basically said “fuck it”, yeeted them all into the world of Girl Genius (which was inevitable), figured out the torrid backstory of the beta kids and ancestors and how the dancestors and trolls fit in, and set about focussing the plot and character development exclusively on the alpha kids, particularly Jake and Jane. Particularly particularly Jake, because a) I thought him more underappreciated than Jane, and b) the idea of a Heroic Adventurer who constantly has to resist his own reflex to be a minion is fucking funny.

Let’s elaborate, shall we? Because I’m okay again, after the epilogue. I have forgiven. So, the hypothetical pfennig novels/fics in a series:

Jake English: Escape from Castle Lalonde

In which Jake leaves home, and meets a number of interesting people.

covers from basically that scene of Roxy capturing him through Jake escaping with Jane, and them agreeing to be adventuring partners. A lot of the middle consists of Jake helping Roxy and Dirk win back Roxy’s ancestral home of Castle Lalonde, defeating whatever villainous spark - probably an OC - had taken up residence.

Jake means to leave, but Roxy and Dirk need help cleaning up, and getting their labs running, and with interesting projects…and possibly they put a shock collar on him so he can’t leave the grounds…or at least tell him that’s what the collar does, and prove it, like, twice, and then turn it off because they don’t actually want him crippled in an emergency; mostly he’s just a great minion and Roxy is pretty sure he’s destined to be part of their team for defeating the Batterwitch, as laid out in the obscure and highly metaphorical prophecy her mother left her in a wizard book.

this is not at all good ground for either friendship or a healthy minion/master relationship, which is why Jake is pretty damn game to help Jane escape and then run away with her.

Jake English and the Red Miles

in which…I actually have barely any memory of wtf is supposed to happen in this one. Presumably, they have to survive the Red Miles at some point, with some ridiculous series of revivificationsthe trolls show up at Jake and Jane’s camp (okay fine, I love them, too), and after some alarmed mutual weapon-pointing, explain that Jake’s grandmother, Lady English, made them after Jake left, except now she’s died so they’ve come to find Jake and either bring him home or, at least, join his adventuring team and keep him safe

(yeah, Jade instilled some loyalty, which is Sketch. In fairness, when she lost control of the original generation of trolls, all her best friends were killed and/or disappeared, presumed dead. she has reasons)

I wonder if there was supposed to be a timeskip between this and the previous book, or if Escape from Castle Lalonde happened later into Jake going out adventuring than I think, or if Jade just got bored and made 12 new people like…3 hours after Jake left home

for pacing, the trolls should probably show up pretty early in this story, so they have a long time to be around before shit hits the fan

a lot of this book, aside from whatever shenanigans they’re dealing with re: Red Miles, would be Jake dealing with the fact that he is suddenly responsible for 12 people who keep looking to him for orders, and somewhere in the distance is an entire town (Hellmurder Village) that’s likewise.

they do not go back to the Castle at the end of this book, even though they arguably should bc Jake has responsibilities. But he also has adventuring to do, by golly, and…hm, it’s one of the Rings that causes the Red Miles, isn’t it? So maybe they get it at the end of this book, and now they have to track down the other one. Which brings us to…

Jake English and the Rings of Skaia

In which Jake and Jane (and Roxy and Dirk, and 12 young trolls) explore a castle, learn a little history, and generally level up their friendshipsI split up the aspects of Castle Heterodyne in this au: Jake has the recently inherited Castle with the terrifying, nigh-magical power source buried in its depths, and Jane has the abandoned derelict that is fully sentient, most automated, and even more malicious than it is trapped. This is the story of that castle, and the Ring of Life hidden somewhere in it

Jack Noir. The castle’s sentience is Jack Noir. Or perhaps more accurately Spades Slick? Who cares.

I had a very elaborate mythology/history thought up at some point about the twin spark queens of Derse and Prospit and their great enmity, and the saga of betrayal and heroism that marked their reigns and left behind this castle and two super magical scientific rings of power, and I do not remember ANY of it now.

This is the bit where that scene of Dirk ripping out Vriska’s soul comes from. He and Roxy are here for the fabled treasure as well - possibly the castle only appears/is accessible at certain specific times? And they don’t know the trolls are with Jake, so…clusterfuck, there.

Jake English and the Troll Queen

in which the big bad is reveeled

there’s trouble brewing in the countryside, idk, monsters or pirates or something that can be traced, after some investigative heroing, to the self-styled Her Imperial Condescension, still unfortunately at large

mostly this fic is Jake growing into leadering a little more but also addressing the question of that inbuilt loyalty Jade gave this generation of trolls, because really, that was Sketch - and in general, who are we as people defined by who we follow, what groups we ally ourselves with; is it birth or genetics or who raised us or the family we choose or…

i kinda think Dirk and Roxy are conducting concurrent but generally not overlapping investigations to Jake&Jane’s(+the trolls) (dirk and roxy having pretty neatly answered all the above questions years ago by choosing each other, but still being kind of insular about it, and need to relax just enough to trust other people)

in the end there’s some confrontation with the Condesce and she convinces ½-2/3 the trolls to join her bc, honestly, why shouldn’t they

Jake English and the Castle in the Lake

in which…okay, in this one bit of fic I implied her base was in the ocean but I totally had this title written somewhere, so what is the truth??

in the above linked scene, the trolls who stayed with Jake and Jane were Karkat, Terezi, Kanaya, Gamzee, and Feferi, but idk about that. If Feferi’s there, why isn’t Sollux? And, like, Aradia would probably have just fucked off in her own direction completely, given the chance…

our heroes are trying to sneak into HIC’s base and disable it, okay. that is the plot of this one. probably they have to find it first, which is tricky, and basically a D&D dungeon crawl, and that’s before Jane gets tiara’d. Which definitely happens climactically. and then everyone else gets captured, with the possible exception of Dirk, who probably gets beheaded instead. things do not look good for our heroes…

Jake English and the Lost Hero

in which we find out exactly what happened in the previous generation

maybe even alternating chapters, past/present?

what happened basically is that the first generation of trolls, the Ancestors, went absolutely batshit roughly as per homestuck canon. The Condesce, being OP, started just conquering land. She was stopped, eventually, mostly by the epic sacrifice of Rose and Dave. And John…except Rose and Dave’s bodies were found, and in a clusterfuck of inventions warping time and space and reality itself, John’s never was

Jade survived, of course. obviously.

John did, too, it is revealed. He was just disconnected from the time-space continuum, stuck popping up in random times and places, sometimes close to those he loved and sometimes not, mostly uncontrollable…

he’s appeared here and there throughout the stories, probably, a mysterious figure in blue who nearly has time to say something before dissolving into fizzing wind. Now he appears more frequently, and for longer periods as the story goes on, including just enough to help break Roxy and Jake out of prison. And whichever trolls were stubbornly sticking with them - if the Condesce wasn’t just mind-controlling all the reluctant ones…let’s be real, she was…lotta “I know you’re in there somewhere” fights here, probably

also, Vriska reveals herself to still be trying to help our heroes, because it is SO Vriska to try to double-cross Her fucking Imperious Condescension

this double-cross is revealed partly from her using Jake’s minioning safeword that he developed with Grandma Jade, way back when; meaning roughly “I don’t want to do this but I’m not sure I can stop”. It’s pumpkin, of course.

they revivify Dirk on the way out, and either stop in the Condesce’s lab to get sparkily distracted trying to pin John into reality or they make it back to Hellmurder Castle before doing that?

What am I saying. The Condesce is probably working on some spacetime-warping tech of her own, and Roxy, Dirk, and Jake use it to fully anchor John for the first time in…who knows, subjectively? It’s possible he stays behind to buy them time to run

Jake English and the Battle for the Green Sun

in which things come to a head

aka the Battle for Hellmurder Castle, and it’s mysterious and terrible power source

Jane and half or so of the trolls start out on the Condesce’s side, but if you thought there were good “I know you’re in there” fights before, just WAIT until Jake saves Jane with the power of friendship

ultimately, it’s alpha kids + Alternian trolls + dancestor-clanks VS Her Imperial Condescension

it’s close

it’s very close

I would have krilled for an H–EIR—ESS CHALLENGE X3 COMBO, ie, Jane, Feferi, and Meenah vs. the Condesce, so that happens

John maybe appears one last time-displaced time, for him before the events of Lost Hero, to deliver a well-timed hammer swing

I love Jake, but I’ll give Homestuck this one: Roxy getting the final blow with an ancestral Strider sword? Perfect.

in the denoument Jake awkwardly invites everyone to live in Hellmurder Castle, because he feels vaguely like he should stay and look after it, and of course he wants his chums around. Jane, Roxy, and Dirk are all like, “well, a real lab or seven would be amazing…but also…adventuring. Why don’t YOU come with US?” Jake is like, “oh JEEPERS yes!” The trolls and dancestors meanwhile talk out among themselves who genuinely wants to stay and who wants to go out adventuring, either with these idiots or just to make their own way

#homestuck #girl genius #jake english #jane crocker #roxy lalonde #dirk strider #hellmurder castle au #my fic #ficlet #ministro spei #virgine vitae #hs trolls #dancestors #latrone nihil #duce animi #random anon asks

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majesticpossum · 7 years

Text

1000 Question Challenge

Hey rats, I have decided to do the 1000 question challenge because I'm still at home and bored as hell so either read it or ignore idc.Because i did all of these bitches at once and it took me two hours i challenge all of you rats because i fucking hated that lmao. k bye.

1000 Question Survey The Basics 1.) Your name: Abigail

2.) Nicknames: Abby, Abs, and Abbers

3.) Do you like these nicknames?: Sure

4.) Location: USA- Indiana

5.) Age:18.

6.) Birthday: June 14th

7.) Zodiac sign: Gemini

8.) Parents names: Iige & Anne

9.) Siblings?: 2 younger brothers

10.) Pets: I have 3 cats: Rudy, Oliver & Mary Francis, One Fish: Spoopy

11.) Number of rooms in your house: Like 18? Idk 12.) Religion: Catholic

13.) If so-practicing?: Yea Boi

14.) Male or Female?: Female.

15.) Is your family close?: In a way

What are your favorite 16.) Foods: ITALIAN

17.) TV shows: Parks N Rec, 30 Rock, Arrested Development, New Girl, Grey’s Anatomy, Friends and basically anything else on my Netflix list

18.) Movies: Pulp Fiction, Narnia Movies, High School Musical, Evita, Mamma Mia and a lot

19.) Actors: Dylan O’Brien

20.) Actresses: Julie Andrews is my grandma

21.) Books: I’m a Harry Potter girl. And Shane Dawson’s books are fab

22.) Artists: Little Mix, Halsey, Drake and Beyonce

23.) Types of Music: Everything but country lmao

24.) Video Games: MarioKart for days

25.) Computer Games: 2048??

26.) Outfits: I’m not about to post some ootd pics so no

27.) Stores: Vineyard Vines, Kohls, Charlotte Russe, Aerie and Pink lol

28.) Sports: Volleyball

29.) Colors: PINK

30.) Numbers: 10

31.) Websites: Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr, Moodle (lmao)

32.) Cartoons characters: Abbycadabby bitch

33.) TV Channels: Bravo & E!

34.) Made For TV Movies: GRUMP CAT’S CHRISTMAS

35.) Comedians: Zane Hijazi and all those people

36.) Comediennes: CHRISTINE SYDELKO

37.) Hair products: All Aveda hunty ;)

38.) Makeup Products: I wear Sephore mascara and thats all

39.) Kind of Pens: The kind that let you write?

40.) Kind of Shows: Comedy

41.) Pieces of Jewelry: Necklaces and Ear Rings

42.) Kinds of Soap: Organic

43.) Kinds of Shampoo: Aveda

44.) Game Systems: Wii I guess

45.) CD s: Anything by Beyonce fam

46.) Snacks: Tostitos

47.) Past times: NAPS

48.) Things to do on the weekend: Sleep and be with my friends

49.) Magazines: Any celeb magazine is something I’ll read

50.) Animals: CATS

Clothing 51.) Favorite Brand of Clothing?: Vineyard Vines all day every day

52.) Favorite sweatpants: My HS Ones

53.) What is your everyday outfit?: Something last minute thrown together

54.) Do you wear a uniform to school?: I did

55.) Do you like it?: Depends on the day

56.) What is your favorite clothing store?: I already did this

57.) Do you try to dress like other people?: Ya, 2008 Lady Gaga :]

58.) Do you consider yourself to be trendy?: In the snobby white house wife community? Probably, yea

59.) What kind of shoes do you wear?: Boots and Sperrys

60.) Do you like funky shoelaces?: No

61.) Do you wear hats?: In the summer sometimes

62.) Do you wear a lot of jewelry?: My cross necklace and ear rings

63.) If so, what?: oh shit wrong line

64.) Do you wear belts?: Ha no

65.) Do you wear skirts?: Not since high school

66.) Do you wear revealing clothing?: Sometimes.. A girl’s gotta live

67.) Do you like the Eskimo look?: no

68.) Do you wear big pimpin coats?: no lol

69.) Do you carry a purse or bag?: purse

70.) If so, what is it like?: It’s a pink coach purse

School 71.) What are your grades like?: I got all A’s & B’s this semester

72.) Do you wish you could change your performance in school?: I can always do better

73.) Are you failing anything?: no

74.) Do you take a language?: fuck no

75.) If so which language?: N/A

76.) Who is your favorite teacher?: My hipster Theo professor

77.) Do you decorate your locker?: If by locker you mean dorm then yes

78.) Do you decorate your bookbag?: Do I? no. Did Aerin? Yes.

79.) If so, with what?: she spilt a fuck ton of paint on it

80.) Do you draw on yourself in school?: no

81.) Do you doodle all over your notebooks?: In calc i did lol

82.) Do you take art?: not anymore

83.) Do you walk to school or are you driven?: I drive to campus but I walk to my classes

84.) Do you like school?: YES

85.) How big is your school?: Decently big

86.) Do a lot of your friends go to your school?: Pretty much

87.) Do you wish you could change schools?: Nope

88.) Are you on the Honor/Merit roll?: in high school i was on the honor roll but now its called the dean’s list

89.) Do you participate in school plays?: yesh

90.) Are you in any clubs/which ones?: Choir, Special Olympics, Yoga, IM Volleyball and something else I’m forgetting

Your Room (I’m gonna do my dorm) 91.) What color is your room?: White bc we can’t paint them

92.) Is it messy or clean?: usually in the middle

93.) What are on your bedsheets?: bright blue

94.) Do you have posters on your wall?: yes

95.) If so, of what?: I have a hamilton poster, and a shit ton of ND stuff lol go Irish

96.) Do you have a TV in your room?: Yes.

97.) A computer?: Yes, a laptop.

98.) A radio?: no

99.) An alarm clock?:Nope, I use a phone

100.) A stereo?: no

101.) What is under your bed?: tubs of extra clothes, food, and whatever else I need in college

102.) Do you have a big closet?: hell no

103.) Do you write on your walls?: Nope.

104.) Do you have any beads hanging up?: Nope.

105.) If so, what design?: ^^^^^

106.) Is your ceiling decorated?: ya

107.) If so, of what?: these little star shaped stickers that glow in the dark

108.) Do you decorate your door?: yeah

109.) With what?: white board and flyers

110.) Carpet? No, Wood floor

Music 111.) What are you favorite bands?: Little Mix is my current love

112.) Do you own a lot of CD s?: A good amount

113.) How many exactly?: Hell Idk

114.) Do you download music?: yes.

115.) What are your favorite songs?: PRIVATE SHOW BY LITTLE MIX IS MY JAM

116.) Do you listen to the radio?: Only when I’m in the car.

117.) Do you like loud music?: Love it. >:)

118.) Do you think its obnoxious when people drive down the street with their stereos all the way up blasting the kind of music you loathe?: Not really

119.) Do you like rap?: Sure

120.) Do you like country?: ugh no

121.) What TV shows are you glued to?: GREYS

122.) Are you a couch potato?: I invented the term

123.) Do you watch the news?: No but I do check Twitter

124.) Are you easily influenced by the people on TV?: Yes, Kim K i my god

125.) Who is your favorite TV star?: Kim K

126.) Do you watch late night TV?: Nah.

127.) Do you have more than 100 channels on your TV?: Yeh

128.) Do you actually care about any of those above 100?: idk

129.) Do you watch the Spanish channel just for fun?: Nope.

130.) What is your take on commercials?: I want to go into advertisement so I like them

131.) How big is your TV?: 42 inches

132.) Do you use a remote or change it manually?: remote

133.) When you see something on TV do you run out and buy it as soon as possible?: usually no

134.) Do you like dramas?: Yes.

135.) Do you like comedies?: Yes.

136.) Comedy Central-good or bad?: I’ve never really watched it.

137.) Are you obsessive over anyone on TV?: Dylan O’Brien is a hottie

138.) Do you watch any sports on TV/which ones?: Football and any other ND sport lol

139.) Do you watch music videos?:Sometimes.

140.) Do you like watching I Love the 80’s even if you weren’t living in the 80’s?: Never seen it

Morals/Beliefs 141.) Religion?: Catholic

142.) Do you go to church regularly?:Erm.... sorta?

142.) Pro-life?: YEAH BABY (get it?)

143.) Pro-choice?: No

144.) Are you a virgin?: No

145.) Do you believe in God?: Ya

146.) Jesus?: Is my main man

147.) Allah?: Nope, not my thing

148.) Buddha?: Nope, not my thing

149.) Do you have crosses hanging in your house?: Hella crosses lol

150.) Do you believe in the true meaning of Christmas ?: Yeah

Friends 151.) Who are your best friends?: Emma, Joel, Katie, Ayari, Joseph, Aerin, Bri, and all my dudes

152.) Do you have a lot of friends?: Yea

153.) Who is your funniest friend?: Either Aerin or Scott

154.) Craziest?: AERIN

155.) Weirdest?: Scott

156.) Prettiest: All of them

157.) Fanciest?: Joey

158.) Sportiest?: Emma or Katie

159.) Girliest?: All my girl friends

160.) Mellowest?: Max or Reilly

161.) Stupidest?: ;)

162.) Smartest?: They all smart

163.) Thugest?: Idk maybe Greg? But even then he’s like a teddy bear

164.) Do you have a lot of acquaintances?: yeah

165.) Are you friends with any of your teachers?: From college? No. HS, yes

166.) Are you friends with any friends parents?: Yeah!

167.) Are you really outgoing only around your friends?: I’m outgoing all the time, but more with my friends. 168.) Are you comfortable around your friends?: Very... a little too comfortable

169.) Are you easily influenced by your friends?: Yes.

170.) Are you part of a clique?:in high school i was, now i’m a floater

171.) Do you make new friends easily?: I think so.

172.) Do you have a lot of friends online?: no

173.) Where did you meet them?: N/A

174.) Do you have a lot of LJ friends?: tf is that

175.) Do you sleep over at friends houses a lot?: Houses? no. Dorms? yea.

176.) Do you make yourself at home when you go to other friends houses?: sorta

177.) Do your friends rub off on you a lot?: Yes.

178.) Could you live one day without your friends?: NO

179.) Rate your social life on a scale of 1-10: 8.5

180.) How is this challenge so far?: This takes forever

This or That

181.)

Book bag

/Messenger bag

182.) Punk/Emo

183.)

Rock/Rap

184.)

Jay-Z

/Nas

185.) Justin/Clay

186.) Ruben/Clay

187.)

Cat

/Dog

188.) PS2/Xbox

189.)

DVD

s/VHS

190.)

Cds

/Tapes

191.) Big screen/small screen

192.)

Movies at home/in the theater

193.)

Popcorn/Candy

194.)

Jacket/Coat

195.) Real fur/

Fake fur

196.) sister/

brother

197.)

Home/House

198.) Espanol/Deutsch

199.)

Art/Computer

200.)

Laptop/Desktop

201.) Pepsi/

Coke

202.)

Orange/Apple

203.)

Phone/Computer

204.)

/Letters

205.) Big/Small

206.)

Pizza/Ravioli

207.)

Baby/Toddler

208.) 16/

209.) CSI/

210.)

Superman/Spiderman

211.) Kilborn/Conan

212.) Letterman/Leno

213.)

SNL

/MadTV

214.) Flinstones/Jetsons

216.)

Boxers

/Briefs

217.)

Pants

/Skirts

218.)

Skirts/Skorts

219.)

Fork

/Spoon

220.)

People/InTouch

Are you 221.) Gothic? no 222.) a freak? only in the sheets HAHAHAHAHA I'm sorry 223.) a computer nerd? (Not in the tech-y, gaming way, but just that I’m on the computer a lot) 224.) a science freak? Ha I WISH 225.) a sports fan? CHEER CHEER FOR OLE NOTRE DAME 226.) One of those people that sit in the back of the room during an exam and cough and sniff the whole time? no 227.) a class clown? no 228.) funny? hell yeah 229.) serious? depends 230.) intellectual? i wish 231.) an LOTR nerd? if that means lord of the rings then i am the farthest from it 232.) a failure? :’) 233.) a success? :”) 234.) a loser? Loser Like Me was the best song Glee ever did 235.) popular? Popular is the best song from Wicked 236.) lazy? yep 237.) outgoing? ya 238.) shy? nah 239.) friendly? yea 240.) easily annoyed? yep 241.) tolerant of others views? sure 242.) addicted to crack? damn you got me (no) 243.) addicted to any other drug? no 244.) a partier? sometimes 245.) naturally hyperactive? yes 246.) wild? no 247.) sporty? no 248.) smelly? no 249.) an insomniac? sometimes 250.) a procrastinator? YEAH 251.) a criminal? no 252.) a crackpot? no 253.) a bookworm? sorta 254.) hairy? no 255.) good at playing basketball? HA 256.) in high school? no 257.) in prison? no 258.) from mars? yea 259.) straight? yea 260.) gay? no

Random Questions 261.) Do you like frosted flakes?: no

262.) Are you easily mistaken as being someone of the opposite sex?: no

263.) Do you like nuns?: Yeah

264.) Is this survey getting on your nerves?: Slowly but surely yes

265.) Do you use correct English?: Yeah

266.) Hablar Espanol?: Sí

267.) Spien Deutsch?: tf

268.) Speak English?: yea

269.) Do you know what an aphrodisiac is?:no :((((

270.) Do you know what Draculas first name is?: Bob

271.) Do you like Russian names?: I think the name Silvia is pretty, I was on a volleyball team with a girl named Silva and she was great

272.) Like Vlad?: Not particularly.

273.) Homer?: ? Not really.

274.) Are you a busy body?: no

275.) Do you like to glue quarters to the floor and see how many people try and pick them up and proceed to fail?: Nope.

276.) Do you like to go mini golfing dressed as old men?: I’ve never done that.

277.) Do you like to roller skate?: yes, but Im bad at it

278.) Who do you wish was president?: B E R N I E

279.) What do you think of Pres. Bush?: I was too young at the time

280.) Do you play Roller Coaster Tycoon?: Ugh bringing back the memz

281.) Are you insecure?: no

282.) Are you influenced by ancient Greek culture?: Heavily.

283.) Roman culture?: ONLY ECCI ROMANI ;)

284.) What kind of architecture do you like?: the kind that stays up?

285.) What style architecture is your house?: idk rich white suburb?

286.) Do you like to shop in big cities?: YES

287.) Do you like to clean your room?: sure

288.) Do you hate when people sit in the back of the room during an exam and cough and sniffle the whole time to break your concentration?: No but I feel bad for them bc that sucks

289.) Do you think that clocks are dumb?: Nope.

290.) Does anybody really know what time it is?: It’s summer time.

291.) Does anybody really care?: yeah

292.) Who sings that song?: what song fam

293.) Do you like Chicago?: LOVE

294.) Does Nevada have a football team?: The state doesn’t but the college there does and BOY we KILLED them in Football

295.) What did you get on the last big test you took? 97 on my Theo Exam bc Im a baller

296.) Do you pace in circles when you get nervous?: no

297.) Do you play with dolls?: no

298.) Do you like Star Trek?: I’ve never seen it.

299.) What’s 2+9+9?: 20

300.) Do you like filling out these surveys?: I used to this shit is too much am

Money 301.) Do you have a job?: Not at the moment, I’m a full time college student but I do work over breaks when I am home

302.) What do you do?: I was a waitress

303.) Does your boss like you?: She did when I worked

304.) How much do you get paid?: 10 an hour plus tips

305.) Do you have your own bank account?:Yes.

306.) Do you have a credit card?: Yea

307.) a checkbook?:Nope.

308.) Are you a big spender?:Yes.

309.) Do you go to the mall a lot?: All.The.Time.

310.) In an average week, how much money do you spend?: Maybe like $50.

311.) Do you know how much a peso would be worth in the United States today?:I have no idea.

312.) How about a Franc?: I don’t know.

313.) Do you really care?: Not particularly.

314.) Do you like your job if you have one?: I liked working there, I had a lot of friends

315.) If you don’t have one, do you wish you had one?: No Im in school now

316.) Do you wish you had more money?: doesn’t everyone?

317.) Why?: bc money is fun

318.) Would you rather be filthy rich with no friends or dirt poor with tons of friends and a dog?: Dirt poor with a dog

319.) Do you have a cool wallet?: It’s Vera Bradley so ig

320.) What is the largest amount of money you ever had in your possession at one time?: 2,000 in cash (My high school open house)

321.) What are you wearing?: PJ pants with a Bernie 2016 T shirt lmao

322.) What are you listening to?: My brother talk to my mom

323.) Who are you talking to?: No one

324.) What are you doing other than filling out this survey?: Hating myself for doing this challenge but I’m already on 324 so I can’t give up now

325.) How is your hair?: In braids

326.) Do you have anything on your feet?: socks.

327.) Are you cold or warm?: WARMTH

328.) Do you have any jewelry on?: Ear Rings

329.) Do you have any makeup on?: LOL

330.) Name 4 things laying around your desk: Fish, Pen, IPad, Books

331.) Pick up a book laying near you and type a random sentence from a random page: no fuck that

332.) Open a cabinet near you and describe what’s in it: that sounds like effort I don’t wanna give

334.) Should you be doing something else now?: No

335.) Why aren’t you doing it?: I don’t have anything to do.

336.) Is your room a mess now?: ehhhh

337.) Is your mom nagging at you to clean it?: no

338.) What are any people around you doing?: Mom is on the couch, brother j chillin and the cats are being cats

339.) Who are you thinking about right now?: my hand hurts from typing this shit

340.) Are you doing anything illegal?: no

Looks 341.) How much time do you spend on your appearance in the morning?: Usually about 30 minutes.

342.) Do you wear makeup regularly?: Mascara yeah

343.) If so, what?: bitch i just said

344.) Are your looks important to you?: MINE? yeah

345.) Do you want to change the way you look?: only that my hair would grow back quicker

346.) What would you change?: i.just.told.you.

347.) How do you usually wear your hair?: curly

348.) Do you dye your hair?: no

349.) Do you straighten you hair?: Yes.

350.) What color is your hair naturally?: brown

351.) What is your eye color?: brown

352.) Do you wear colored contacts?: No

353.) Do you look like your parents?:Yes.

354.) Is that good or bad?:It’s good.

355.) Do you turn strange colors sometimes?: no, that would be bad

356.) Why?: what

357.) Do you have any piercings?: My ears.

358.) Any tattoos?: Nope.

359.) Ever gotten a makeover?: Yes.

360.) Do you experiment a lot with new looks?: eh

Travel 361.) Have you ever been out of the country?: No

362.) Out of your state?: yes

363.) Out of your city?: Yes.

364.) Do you go on a vacation every year?: a couple times a year

365.) If so, to where and for how long?: depends, we go somewhere for spring and fall break then a long summer vacation

366.) Have you ever ridden in a plane?: Yup.

367.) In a boat?:Yup.

368.) Do you visit relatives that live far away from you at all?: my aunt in her house in southern florida

369.) ON average, every week how many miles do you travel?: depends if I'm home then not too far and if i go back to school thats like 130 some miles

370.) do you drive? yes

Cars 371.) Favorite car?: A 2015 titanium flex fuel Ford Focus baby.. or a Tesla that my dad is getting :/

372.) Color for that car?: BLUE

373.) Do you have your license?:yes

374.) Permit?: i did once

375.) Do you like fast cars?: sure

Sleep 376.) How long so you sleep each night on average?: 8 or 9

377.) Is this enough?: sure

378.) Do you dream every night?: no

379.) Describe a weird dream you had: I made out with a teacher I had in High School

380.) Do you sleep in awkward positions?: Sometimes.

381.) do you sleep in school? not in class

382.) If so, do you wake up with different patterns all over your face from whatever you were laying on?: no

383.) What position do you usually wake up in?: on my side

389.) Does your alarm clock wake you up?: sadly

390.) What kind of alarm clock do you have?: I use my phone.

Going Out 391.) How often do you go to parties?: not every weekend, but i go out enough to not be considered lame

392.) Are you a crazy party hopper?: depends on the parties I’m at

393.) Do you like wild parties with lots of people?: Dorm parties? no. House Party? sure.

394.) Are you a social butterfly?: I think so.

395.) Do you go clubbing?: I have been once

396.) Ever been drunk?: ;)

397.) Ever get kicked out of a party?: Nope.

398.) For what?: N/A

399.) Do you throw a lot of parties?: No

400.) Do you go to the mall a lot?: Too much

401.) Do you go with a lot of friends?: I have never been to the mall alone

402.) Do you like going to arcades?: sure

403.) Is DDR a cool game?: Idk what that is

404.) What about those racing games?: not my thing

405.) How many parties have you been to in the last 3 months?: maybe 4? If you don’t count laid back christmas parties

406.) How many formal dances have you been to in the last year or so?: I guess 3 if you count Prom and Home Coming in hs then formal in college

407.) Do you dress up when you go out?: yeppers

408.) Do you go to see a lot of movies on the weekend?: not really

409.) Who has the best parties?: Joey Dating and Stuff 410.) Are you involved romantically with anyone right now?: Yes.

412.) Do you wish you were with someone right now?: I wish I was with my boyfriend, he lives far away 413.) Do you have a secret crush?: no

414.) Who?: N/A

415.) Do they know?: N/A

416.) How many people have you dated in the passed year?: two

417.) Kissed in the past year?: two

418.) Do you know what 143 means?: no

419.) How many people have you said “I love you” to?: one

420.) Did you mean it?: at the time i did

421.) If you didn’t mean in, why did you bother saying it?: no

422.) Do you say I Love You to your friends all the time?: yeah

423.) Where do you go out on dates?: Dances, Dinner, Movie Nights, Lunches, or anything really.

424.) What’s the most fun date you ever had?: Stephen (my boyfriend) and I went to this really cool shopping area by our schools and it was just a lot of fun

425.) If you break up with someone do you cry your heart out while listening to breakup songs and then in an hour your fine again with a new love-buddy?: Honestly depends

Would Win In a Fight? 426.) Britney or Christina 427.) Justin or JC 428.) Frodo or Sam 429.) B2K or Nsync 430.) Cartman or Bart Simpson 431.) Dracula or Frankenstein 432.) Triumph or Simon Cowell 433.) Conan or Jay 434.) Rosie O Donnell or Boy George 435.) Carmen Electra or Pamela Anderson 436.) Tommy Lee or the guy who’s married to Carmen Electra right now 437.) Bill O'Reilly or Chris Matthews

Inspiration 438.) Who are your heroes?: This woman I’ve grown up knowing, she is a holocaust survivor.

439.) Why do you look up to them?: she was in the fucking holocaust

440.) Do you wish you could be just like them?: i do not want to go through the holocaust

441.) State the most inspiring quote you know: “fuck bitches get money”

442.) Do your parents inspire you?: Totally

443.) Do any of your friends inspire you?: yeah

More Random Questions 444.) Are nutri-grain bars good or bad?: Never had one 445.) Do you eat a lot of donuts? hell yeah

446.) What kind?: ALL

447.) Do you like chocolate?: too much

448.) Has your uncle ever gone to jail for unpaid parking tickets?: no

449.) Do you see dancing giraffes and living gnomes in your sleep?: I’m sick of this bullshit challenge

450.) Do you like headphones that go in your ears or stay out?: stay out

451.) Do you like mini blinds?: I’m not sure if i know what that means

452.) Have you ever broken your mini blinds with a hanger?: once again: what?

453.) Have you ever gotten into a violent fit of rage and tried to murder someone?: no

454.) How is this survey so far?: ugh

.455.) Do you like the movie Fantasia ?: it’s just kinda there

What s Your Take On 456.) Life: it is too short

457.) The world: it would be a much better place if Julie Andrews ran it

458.) President Bush: okay when was this even made

459.) Ahhhhnold: pardon?

460.) Gary Coleman running for governor: GARY FROM SPONGEBOB IS COOL

461.) Howard Stern: isn’t he the bald guy from America’s Got Talent and Deal or No Deal?

462.) The war in Iraq: I wish it wasn’t a thing

463.) the economy: fuck AP Macro

464.) jay-z retiring: but Bey is still going strong ;)))

465.) school: I like school

466.) going to college: ITS THE BEST

467.) marriage: is for everyone! love is love!

468.) football: ND or die

469.) baseball: ND or die

470.) people cutting themselves for pleasure: people do that? 471.) Pick your nose? don't do that 472.) Untie your shoe laces every time you take your shoes off? lol 473.) Fart a lot? my brother does lol 474.) Burp a lot? my brother does lolz 475.) Do stupid things in public? me when I'm drunk 476.) Terrorize innocent people on golf courses? why did my mind go to Troy and Gabriella in HSM2 477.) Have random hallucinations? do hugs not drugs 478.) Wear shirts with quotes on them? :/ 479.) Wear patches and/or pins on your clothing? it isn’t 2003 480.) Wear leg warmers? it isn't 1980 481.) Sing in the shower? hell yeah 482.) Play any card game? sure 483.) Sleep with a teddy bear? Patrick Grisley <3 484.) Take your pet for a walk? I have cats and a fish bro 485.) Have a snake? I would 486.) Have webbed feet? I am not a duck 487.) Wear colorful socks? sure 488.) Have a life? I think I have that 489.) Drink coffee? I drink to much 490.) Drink tea? yea!

Internet 491.) What are your screen names?: abbycadabby bitch or majesticpossum 492.) Emails?: guess.

493.) Do you have a website?:no

494.) Do you have a live journal or dead journal?: leave the journals alone

495.) Do you ever get off the computer?: at this point in this challenge I’ll die on the computer

496.) What are your favorite websites?: Vineyeardvines.com

497.) What are your favorite online stores?: see questions 496

498.) Do you buy a lot of stuff online?: ;))))))))

499.) If so, what?: clothes... a lot of it

500.) What’s the last thing you bought online?: Ear rings

501.) Do you have a lot of online friends?: no

502.) Have you ever met any of them in person?: no

503.) Who’s the best person to talk to online?: i don’t talk to people

504.) Do you ever catch yourself using computer language outloud?:I say lol too much or smh

505.) Do you use AIM, ICQ, Yahoo, MSN ?: LOL HUNTY its 2017

506.) What’s your desktop background?: Me, Ayari, Katie and Aerin on a couch

507.) What’s your AIM icon?: N/A

508.) How many hours do you spend online in a week on average?: too many

509.) Do you have a webcam or a mic?: in my computer I do

510.) If your computer shut down for a week, would you die?: If i was at school I would

Presents 511.) What’s the best present you’ve ever received?: The gift of life

512.) What’s the worst present you’ve ever received?: The gift of life

513.) Do you think it’s better to give than to receive?: I just thought of that in a sexual way

514.) Do you feel guilty when people get you a great present, but you didn’t get them one?: I always give people presents fam

515.) Do you make up a lie to cover it up?: no

More Favorites 516.) Favorite radio station: 99.5 WZPL or the LA and NY Sirus Pop channels

517.) Favorite day of the week: FRIDAY

518.) Favorite fruit: strawberries fuck me up

519.) Favorite vegetable: Spinach.

520.) Favorite lunch meat: :/

521.) Favorite candy bar: All

522.) Favorite nail polish: Essie.

523.) Favorite chair: my chair at home is hella comfy

524.) Favorite early morning show: I sleep through the mornings

525.) Favorite morning talk show host: Ellen?

526.) Favorite writing paper: college ruled no doubt

527.) Favorite section of the newspaper: the comics

528.) Favorite sibling (if you have any): I like them both

529.) Favorite distant relative: My aunts

530.) Favorite dessert: all

531.) Favorite weather: warm and sunny

532.) Favorite season: Summer.

533.) Favorite shoe brand: SPERRY

534.) Favorite lunch: Anything with mozzarella sticks

535.) Favorite breakfast: FRENCH TOAST STICKS

536.) Favorite author: John Green

537.) Favorite place to see concerts: Lucas Oil Stadium or Stephan Center

538.) Favorite band to see live: 1D bitches

539.) Favorite survey you’ve ever gotten: fuck you

More This or That 540.) Nike/Adidas 541.) Alone/With friends 542.) Work/Have off 543.) Pomegranate/Persimmon 544.) Raspberry/Blueberry 545.) Cheech and Chong/Abbot and Costello 546.) Acid/Shrooms 547.) Who/The Who 548.) Older/Newer 549.) Regular pretzel/Pretzel log 550.) Have sex/Make love Bitch they both fun tf

Have you ever 551.) Used a swear word the wrong way and made it sound completely stupid? probably 552.) Skipped school? ;) 553.) Done drugs? no 554.) Been drunk? ;)) 555.) Been so drunk you couldn’t remember your own name? No, I keep my wits about me 556.) Had to look after someone who was on drugs? no 557.) Gone insane? probably 558.) Been in the hospital over night? yea 559.) Been in a car accident? yea 560.) A bike accident? yea 561.) Broken a bone? no but I'm about to knock on some wood 562.) Sprained a wrist or an ankle? i don't think so? 563.) Been online for more than 8 hours at one shot? probably 564.) Loved somebody so much it made you cry? YES 565.) Watched TV for more than 11 hours straight? oh hell yeah, i probably did that today 566.) More than 12 hours? yeah 567.) How about 5 hours? yeah 568.) Slipped in public and had everyone laugh at you? yes 569.) Passed out from hunger? no 570.) Been to a LAN party? and that is...?

Other Stuff 571.) Do you like going to basketball games?: If its ND then hell yea

572.) How about swim meets?: fuck that

573.) Tennis matches?: never been

574.) Do you like Family Feud?: well I don’t hate it

575.) The ones with Richard?: is that a dick joke

576.) How about Match Game?: never seen it?

577.) Do you watch Game Show network regularly?: Nope.

578.) Do you believe in dream catchers?: not really but they can't hurt ya know

579.) Do transvestites appeal to you?: I support the cause

580.) Have you ever been to New York City?: Yes.

581.) Do you wish you could live somewhere else?: Washington DC

582.) Do you dress in different ways to look like other people?: no

583.) Yes or No: Christina Aguilera has talent: yeah

584.) Do you like TiVo?: I’ve never had it

585.) Do you have a TiVo?: Nope

586.) VCR s or DVD players?: DVD players.

587.) Are you an animal rights activist?: Hell yeah

588.) A vegan?: no

589.) Vegetarian?: no but I was for a year

590.) What do you want to be when you grow up?: Marketing person

Do you know 591.) Who won the Super Bowl last year?: BRONCOS BABY LETS GO

592.) Two years ago?: I wanna say Seahawks

593.) Who hosted Family Feud after Richard?: Steve Harvey!

594.) The author of “Frankenstein”?: FUCk i knew this last year we did it

595.) Who the Canadian Prime Minister is?: the really cool guy who supports the LGBT movement. sorry reilly i don't know am

596.) The Queen of England?: Queen Elizabeth

597.) Prime Minister of Britain?: I don’t know since he stepped down

598.) Espanol?: a little

599.) Deutsch?: no 600.) Japanese?: no 601.) Français?: no 602.) Chinese?: no 603.) Portuguese?:no 604.) (If you don’t, do you wish you knew any of these languages?): probably all of them

606.) The capital of the US?: Washington, DC.

607.) All of the Canadian provinces?: ONTARIO....thats all I know. I have a friend from Toronto

608.) The two most commonly used languages in the world?: English and maybe Chinese?

609.) How to fly a kite?: yea 610.) How to surf?: yeah, but not well 611.) Skateboard?: no 612.) How about rollerblade?: lmao no but my dad did in college 613.) What year the Korean war started?: ....

Emotions 614.) What is the one thing in the world that makes you teary eyed?:Those sad ASPCA commercials

615.) Happy eyed?: CATS

616.) What song always makes you sad?: Moments by one direction

617.) Happy?: All Night Longer by Sammy Adams

618.) Which person always makes you really happy?: Stephen!

619.) Really depressed?: my ex

620.) Are you a really emotional person?: YeS

621.) Are you a naturally depressed person?: during the winter i am

622.) A naturally happy person?: I think so

623.) How long does it take you to overcome a bad emotion?: Sometimes 10 minutes, sometimes hours, sometimes days.

624.) What do you do?: cry

625.) What song do you think was written about your life?: Wonderland by Taylor Swift.

The Last Person To 626.) Who was the last person to hug you?: My dad

627.) Talk to you?: My mom

628.) IM you?: i cant remember 2003

629.) Touch you physically?: does that mean sexually

630.) Touch you emotionally?: idk

631.) Hurt you?: probably me because I run into everything

632.) Make you feel gooooood?: ;) stepho

633.) Scold you?: probs my parents

634.) Praise you?: also my parents

635.) Say “Hello” to you?: my brother. he literally was singing the Adele song

Weaknesses 636.) Are you secure with yourself?: I have my moments

637.) What do other people think of you?: They think Im bubbly

638.) What kind of person do you see yourself as?: Awkward but means well

639.) What is your one maaaaajjoooorrrr weakness?: I get attached way to easily

640.) Do you consider yourself to be a strong person?: eh

641.) A weak person?: ehh

642.) Are you stressed out?: pretty much always

643.) If someone insults you, can you just brush it off or move on?:yeah but I get petty as hell

644.) Do you hold grudges against others that insult you?: not really

645.) If you are sitting in class and you say something really dumb or do something really stupid and everyone starts laughing at you, can you brush it off easily?: I probably will blush and then cry

MORE Random Stuff 671.) Name all the Teletubbies in order right now no thinking: Tinky Winky, Po and Lala

672.) Do you like to blurt out random sayings in a conversation for no reason?: oh hell yeah

673.) Do you talk Simmish?: what

674.) Oday ouyay peaksay igpay atinlay?: bitch what the fuck even..

675.) Isn’t pig latin the best?: fuck off

676.) Do you have a distinct smell?: my perfume

677.) Do you know anyone who has a distinct smell that you wish you could bottle and make a perfume or something?: no

678.) Have you ever read Gone With the Wind?: part or it

679.) Did you ever have a crazy eighth grade teacher?: all of them

680.) Are you in an asylum?: Nope.

681.) College?: yeah

682.) What is your favorite scent?: Flowery

683.) Do you eat chocolate?: ALWAYS

684.) Where is your favorite restaurant?: anywhere with mozzarella sticks

685.) What is the best feeling in the world?: orgasm LMAO

686.) What is the worst feeling in the world?: not orgasming LMAO

687.) Do like Spongebob?:Yes!

688.) Do you think he s gay?: spongebob?

689.) How about Squidward? A little off track?: he’s a tad gay

690.) Do you like to make up stupid excuses in school like “I was too busy getting raped by a bull to do my homework”?: i’m honestly triggered by this questions wtf

691.) Do you do your homework every night?: yesssssss

692.) Do you usually get a lot?: yea

693.) “OOOOOO poor baby”: okay literally fuck off

694.) Have you ever been French kissed by a dog?: ;))))))

695.) Have you ever fed a dog or cat out of your mouth?: surprisingly no

696.) Ever eaten a doggie biscuit?: ... I dont wanna talk about it

697.) Don’t you wish they would make them for humans too?: no

698.) Where is your second home?: my dorm lmao

699.) Are dollar stores cool?: hell yeah

700.) How many phone numbers do you have memorized that you don’t need to look up?: maybe like 3

701.) Do you wish your teeth would get whiter?: sure

702.) Can you do the limbo?: smh

703.) Do you make New Year’s Resolutions?: HA no

Which Friend 704.) Has the best taste in music?: Katie because it is exactly like mine

705.) Has the coolest name?: Ayari

706.) Has the best taste in movies?: Not Michael lmao

707.) Has the nicest hair?: Joseph has got some quality hair

708.) Has the fittest body?: me bitch

709.) Do you hang out with most?: All of them

710.) Has the coolest parents?: idk

711.) Lives closest to you?: they all live either in Northern Indiana or out of state

712.) Lives the farthest from you?: Joseph, in LA

713.) Can you relate to most?: Katie

714.) Is the best for advice on anything?:Greg

715.) Can you make you laugh the easiest?: Aerin or Joseph

Word Association! 716.) blow: job 717.) lollipop: i want one 718.) obnoxious: me 719.) cold: water 720.) hot: mess 721.) smell: Goof 722.) car: wash? 723.) rain: freezing 724.) wet: ;) I'm sorry i need to chill but its been a month since I've seen my boyfriend so SUE me 725.) steamy: see questions 724 726.) bite: hickeys 727.) beer: i need one 728.) rock: HARD ROCK 729.) hard: ROCK HARD ROCK 730.) soft: pillows

OK Here’s the dirty part oh shit whaddup 731.) Have you ever played a game that required the removal of clothing?: sex?

732.) What’s your favorite place to be kissed?: anywhere within reason

733.) Are you a tease?: LOL thats the one thing I’ve got going for me

734.) Spit or swallow: Swallow don't be a prude

More “Do you” 735.) Twirl your hair? yes 736.) Hate yourself? no 737.) Want to kill yourself? no 738.) Dream of death and blood and gore? no 739.) Go into frequent fits of depression and/or rage? no 740.) Touch your face a lot? yes 741.) Watch MTV? sometimes 742.) Have any lesbian/gay/bi friends? yes 743.) Consider yourself tolerant of other people’s differences? yes 744.) Wish you could fly? eh 745.) Wish you could be invisible? eh 746.) Read minds? yes 747.) Watch wrestling? fuck no 748.) Like filling out love surveys? fuck this 749.) Work out? yes 750.) Play any sports?yes

More Have You Ever 751.) Gotten a DUI? no 752.) A speeding ticket? thank god no 753.) Been in a fist fight? no 754.) Participated in a backyard wrestling match? no 755.) Considered a life as a criminal? no 756.) Held a gun? yes 757.) Considered prostituting yourself for money? college is hard 758.) Been used? no 759.) Been rejected? yeah 760.) Experimented with homosexuality? no 761.) Threw up on a roller coaster? no 762.) Laughed so hard you peed your pants? yes 763.) Slept more than 13 hours straight? hell yeah 764.) Tackled the mailman? no 765.) Laugh so hard you cried? no 766.) Been on the phone for more than 5 hours straight? no 767.) Done crack? no 768.) Done cocaine? no 769.) Passed out during school? yes 770.) Had unprotected sex? no

More Random Questions!!!!!!!!!! 771.) Do you know what boricua/moricua/morena mean?: bitch WHAT

772.) What language is spoke in Brazil?: Portuguese.

773.) Can you name all 32 football teams in the NFL?: yes but I'm not gonna do that now

774.) How about every baseball team in MLB?: fuck No.

775.) Do you like hot dogs?: Yes.

776.) Are baseball games fun?: sure

777.) Is 7 a lucky number?: Sure.

778.) Do you believe in Ouiji boards?: idk

779.) Have you ever played a guitar?: yeah

780.) Do you have dreams about becoming famous?: yes

781.) Do you like U2?: YES

782.) Has anyone ever asked you about U2 and you responded “I LOVE U2!” and the other person got really confused?: no

783.) Do you own a CD by the Beatles?: yes

784.) Do you straighten your hair?: Yes.

785.) Do you wear sweat pants?: i live in them

786.) Do you wear black lipstick?: lmao

787.) What kind of headphones do you have?: The Apple earbuds that came with my iPhone.

788.) Do you use your portable CD player a lot?: not since 2008

789.) How often do you need to buy a new CD player?: not since 2007

790.) What is the CD in your CD player right now?: I don’t think anything.

791.) How often do you change your underwear?: every day if not twice

792.) Are you addicted to popping pimples?: no

793.) Do you ever slip and accidentally say “pimping popples” instead of “popping pimples”?: bitch what

794.) Do you have a walk in closet?: yes

795.) Did you ever get stuck in a closet while listening to “Harder to breathe” or whatever by Maroon 5?: no

796.) Do you pray daily?: not always

797.) If you die right now what will happen to you?: Well that would suck

798.) Are you paranoid?: yes

799.) Do you go to thrift stores to shop?: no

800.) Have you ever seen a used pair of underwear for sale?: no but lets not do that people

Which One Are You? 801.) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle: the rat thing thats on the show

802.) Power Ranger: The pink one.

803.) Rugrat: angelica

804.) Powerpuff Girl: Bubbles.

805.) Villain: Darth Vader bitches

Do You Own 806.) A cell phone? yes 807.) A CPR certification card? no 808.) A Member s Only jacket? no 809.) A book over 900 pages long? yes 810.) A porno? no 811.) A gun? my family does 812.) A pair of toe socks? no 813.) A portable DVD player? no 814.) A Michael Bolton CD? no 815.) A car? yes 816.) A trucker hat? no 817.) A pair of cut-off shorts? yes 818.) A wife beater? lmao probably 819.) A butcher knife? yes 820.) A pocket knife? no 821.) A Rolex? my dad does 822.) A bike? no 823.) A thong? yes 824.) A bikini? no 825.) A speedo (guys)? i am woman 826.) Anything from Tijuana? no 827.) A drum set? no 828.) An electric guitar? 829.) A signed photo of anyone famous? yes 830.) Any of the “Rocky” movies? no

More Random Questions 831.) Do you have fleas?: No

832.) Quote Aladdin in any way: “Too Close” in the beginning when the camera is in the salesmen’s face

833.) Did you ever play backyard baseball in real life?: yea

834.) How big is your backyard?: not big at all

835.) Do you like hairy backs?: bitch no

836.) Hairy chests?: i personally believe too much is gross but none at all is gross too

837.) Are you attracted to older men/women?: I have never dated someone younger than me

838.) Do you wish you had more hair?: i wish it was longer

839.) What does Prilosec treat?: is that a word

841.) Are you on any medication?: allegories

842.) Do you have asthma?: used to

843.) Do you have an inhaler?: i did

844.) Do you use your inhaler more than 5 times a week?: No

845.) Do you think you need to take medication for this disorder?: what disorder

846.) When was the last time you got a haircut?: last week

847.) What is your hair length?: my boobs

848.) Do you know how to change a tire?: no

849.) Do you know how to change oil in a car?: no but i know how to check it a car needs oil thanks to Stephen and Bri’s shit car

850.) Did a ring ever turn your finger purple/blue/green?: no

851.) Have you ever taken a bus ride to another state?: no

852.) Have you ever taken a bus to the mall?:no

853.) Do you like the show Recess?: thats a blast from the past

854.) What’s your take on the show Judge Judy?: Literal Queen

855.) When did WW2 start?: 1941

856.) When did it end?: 1945

857.) What is your nationality?: American

858.) Where did your family come from?: Germany and England

859.) Have you ever been to Hell?: by hell do you mean Florida in the summer?

860.) Do you believe there is a Satan?: yea

861.) Do you believe in angels?: yes!

862.) Do people always tell you that you look stoned?: people say i act stoned

863.) What percentage of the time are you actually NOT stoned?: 100%.

864.) Do you like to say random words during conversations like “naked” to get people s reactions?: no

865.) Do you own any NKOTB merchandise?: what that mean

866.) Have you ever gotten the urge to bang any member from Menudo?: idk what that is

867.) Aren’t those Menudo kids soooooooooooooo sexy?: I don’t even know who they are.

868.) Do you constantly use away messages even if you are gone for 3 days at one shot?: Nope.

869.) Do you collect anything?:Those pins you get at disney world

870.) Have you ever made a bong from an exhaust pipe?: no

871.) Do you have pothead neighbors?: no

872.) Which is your favorite toe?: my pinky toe

873.) Favorite finger?: middle ;))))

874.) How many wisdom teeth do you have?: 3

875.) Do you have a Kidz Bop CD?: I don’t hate myself

876.) Do you like to watch the Kidz Bop commercials just because they’re so sad and stupid?: no

877.) Have you ever made out with someone of the same sex?: no

878.) If you answered yes to 877, WHY????????!!!: N/A

879.) Do you grind a lot?: at parties.. drunk.. with my boyfriend

880.) Do you like to grate cheese?: grates are scary

881.) Can you sing the Oscar Meyer jingle?: YES

882.) Are you related to someone famous through only 3 degrees of seperation?: what

883.) How about 5 degrees of seperation?: bitch

884.) OK be honest how’s the survey so far?: never ending.

885.) Do you usually like to answer all the questions on surveys?: no

886.) What time is it?: 10:09

887.) Do you use the word uber a lot?: kinda

888.) Do you pretend like you know other languages when you really don’t?: no

889.) Can you take a crap in other people’s houses without feeling awkward?: NO

890.) Have you ever overflowed a toilet in public?:no

891.) What did you do?: N/A

892.) Have you ever heard an old lady say “Fire truck”?: what

893.) Do you swear like a sailor?: yep lmao

894.) Do you think it’s sassy when people of the opposite sex swear every once in a while when they usually don’t?: no

895.) Can you sit on the toilet and take a poo?: can you not do that..?

896.) What term do you like to use for poo the most: crap

897.) What does PMS stand for?: Premenstrual syndrome

898.) Do you like to inhale potpourri?: I mean it smells good ig

899.) Can you say the alphabet backwards without stopping?: nope

900.) How far can you count on your fingers?: 10.

901.) Are outhouses or porta potties ok for you?: fuck no

902.) What is the funniest portapotty company name you have ever seen?: idk

903.) How many people are on your AIM buddy list?: buddy get out of 2005

904.) Do you like the Godfather movies?: I’ve only seen one

905.) How about Good Fellas?: Never seen it.

906.) Watch the Sopranos?: Nope.

907.) Does the mobster life appeal to you?:mobster......Lobster

908.) Do you know anyone in the mob?: 10000% sure my old boss is

909.) Have you ever woken up to find a horse head laying in your bed?: lmao

910.) If you could rename your town to be anything you want, what would you name it?: DirtyBurg

911.) Osama Bin Laden: dead or alive?: I’m triggered this is question 911

912.) Do you wear a lot of bright colors?: no

913.) Do you watch day time soaps?: no but i feel like i should

914.) Do you watch Cartoon Network?: Nope.

915.) Do you use a calculator?: yea

916.) What kind is it?: TI-85???

917.) Do you like pizza to be delivered to you?: hell yeah

918.) Did you ever have to do a science project?: Yup.

919.) Don’t they suck?: yeah.

920.) Did you ever have to help a family member with a science project?: sadly

921.) Do you help out at the Special Olympics?: I do actually

922.) Do you know anyone with mental disabilities?: Yes.

923.) Are you a racist?: no

924.) When you go to restaurants do you eat a lot or try and minimize you intake? food is good

925.) Do you diet?: HA

926.) Do you have trouble sticking to promises?: not really

Hygiene 927.) How often do you shower?: every day

928.) Do you wash your hands after you go to the bathroom?: Yes.

929.) How often do you wash your face?: every night and morning

930.) When you bleed do you use a band aid?: Yes.

931.) Do you wash your cuts out with soap and water?: no

932.) Do you wash your hair every day?: yeah

933.) Do you blow your nose a lot?: no

934.) Do you cough a lot?: not unless I'm sick

935.) If so, do you cover your mouth or let the germs fly?: I usually cough into my arm.

936.) Do you wear deodorant regularly?: Yes.

Issues 937.) Do you have any type of mental disability?: I have an anxiety disorder

938.) Do you have OCD?: no

939.) Do you have ADHD?: Nope.

940.) Are you on any medication for any mental disorder?:no

941.) Do you suffer from anxiety or depression?: anxiety

942.) Do you get sick really often and for long periods of time?: no

943.) Have you ever had the chicken pox?: Nope.

944.) The monkey pox?: Nope.

945.) The mumps?: Nope.

946.) The measles?: Nope.

947.) Did you ever have a hole in your heart?: thats an episode of Grey’s Anatomy

The Last Set of Random Questions 948.) Have you ever been on TV?: Yup.

949.) Have you ever been on the radio?: Yup.

950.) In the newspaper?: Yup.

951.) Have you ever been quoted by anyone at all?: Yup.

952.) Do you watch Saved By The Bell?: I used to.

953.) Did you cry when Mr. Rogers died?: I didn’t know until later

954.) Did you ever see the movie Who Framed Roger Rabbit?: yea

955.) Do you think Frank Zilinski is a moron?: what

956.) Throw me some Polish names: no

957.) What size shoe do you have?: 8

958.) How many pairs of shoes do you have?: I would say like 20

959.) How big is your wardrobe?: Decently large.

960.) How much do you weigh?: 105 pounds.

961.) How tall are you?: 5'9".

962.) Do you have cankles?: Nope.

963.) Do you have fat wrists?: Nope.

964.) Fat thighs?: Nope.

965.) Do you shave your toes?: no

966.) Do you shave your legs?: Yeah.

967.) How often?: All the time

968.) How about those armpits?: Yes.

969.) Are you a germaphobe?: Kind of.

970.) How many legs does an octopus have?: 8.

971.) How many legs do you have?: 2.

972.) Do you have braces?: Nope, but i used to

973.) Are you getting sick of these questions?: YES

974.) Do you snort when you laugh?: Not really.

975.) Do you snore?: no

976.) Do you have your own room?: Yes.

977.) Do you have an overactive bladder?: Nope.

978.) How about an overactive pooper?: Nope.

979.) Have you ever had an out of body experience?: what

980.) Do you know who Tim Burton is and/or do you like him?: yes and eh

981.) How about Tim Curry?: eh

982.) Are you ticklish?: yes but not as bad as my boyfriend lmao

983.) Do you have a gay uncle?: try aunt

984.) A lesbian aunt?: lmao yes

985.) Do you like salad?: Yes.

986.) Have you ever been to a Farmers Market?: Yes.

987.) Ever been to a pig auction?: No thank god

988.) Are you artsy?: sorta?

989.) Do you like to eat pie?: Yeah.

990.) Do you like to say “no pun intended” for no reason?: no i don't hate myself

991.) What’s your favorite pie flavor?: sugar cream bitches

992.) Do you like ice cream cake?: I LOVE IT.

993.) Is the glass half empty or half full?: fuck this

994.) Who was the Lone Ranger’s, nephew’s, horse?: bitch

995.) Do you like cheese?: yes bc thats whats in mozzarella sticks

996.) Do you know Eric Shaun?: Np

997.) Do you think that last question was really lame?: bitchhhhh

998.) Did you think this whole survey was really lame?:

yes

999.) Was it a waste of your time?: YES

1000.) Do you waste a lot of time doing stupid pointless things when you should be doing more important things: I hate that this is the last question

thank god thats over

#survey

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