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#but james and linda are cute together
hiraethedits · 2 years
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never ending gifsets of LINDA CARDELLINI 3 / ∞    
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einsteinsugly · 2 years
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Hyde and Eric, as Adopted Brothers, the Headcanons...
-Eric helps Hyde pull his head out of his ass, at the dawn of the eighties. With a little help from his parents, of course.
-Red and Kitty adopt Hyde as Hyde's wedding gift, so Eric and Hyde are officially brothers. Ever since then (and even before), Eric asks Hyde if he can pass the "doobie, brother." Hyde frogs him, and then passes the joint.
-Fuck the War on Drugs, man.
-Hyde helps Eric (and Red) remember Kitty's birthday. And other birthdays, and anniversaries…
Eric (gesturing wildly): How do you remember all these dates?
Hyde: Jackie's trained me. *Barely skipping a beat* And you're a history teacher…
Eric: And you're a record store owner, who's gone to Oz, and found himself a heart!
-Eric blasts America's "Tin Man" to piss Hyde off, if need be.
-Eric makes Hyde listen to Aerosmith, Bon Jovi, and U2 all the freaking time. He has his limits, though, and won't listen to Genesis or Styx. Maybe Tears for Fears, if he's in a good mood.
-Hyde calls Eric "Beatles Boy." Eric prefers to be called Paul ("I'm the cute one"), and Hyde prefers John. And Jackie is still Yoko. Meanwhile, Kelso is George, Fez is Ringo, and Donna is Linda.
-They're godfathers to each other's firstborns. And they both have nicknames for each other's kids, too. For Hyde, it's Kit (Kate) and Half Pint (Leah). For Eric, it's Heidi (Becca) and Jimmy Dean (James).
-They both watch Little House on the Prairie together. It reminds them of simpler times. And for Eric, Nellie totally reminds him of Laurie.
-They both love George Carlin. He speaks the truth, about this crazy, crazy world.
-They both love listening to Steely Dan, if they're both in a good, chill mood. Meanwhile, Eric tries to slip some Doobie Brothers in there every once in awhile.
-Eric doesn't let Kelso (or Fez, when he's drunk) on his brand-spanking new boat, for obvious reasons. He's more than willing to allow Hyde, though. As long as he promises not to make anyone "swim with the fishes."
-Since Jackie's less than willing, Eric is willing to hang out with Hyde on a beach in Florida. And crack open a beer. He still can't get Hyde to wear shorts, though.
-When Eric has a sea of students that are generally aloof and don't care? He calls them a "sea of Hydes."
Hyde: Forman, I care now.
Eric: But you didn't, way back when. I have to help those sea of Hydes see the light!
-Taking in Hyde, way back when, helped Eric realize that his passion is helping others. Especially those who struggled like his brother. Because with "great power, comes great responsibility."
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no-reply95 · 2 years
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Get Back: Part 1 - Stand Out Moments
The moment where Michael Lindsay-Hogg (MLH) tells John that he and Paul aren't getting on as well as they used to and John acknowledges that he's going through this mess so they can make their relationship better again *heart breaks*
When Dennis O'Dell tells John that Paul predicted exactly what his thoughts on the staging would be and John replies "Did he?" in the most preciously hopeful voice ever - RIP me
MLH (correctly) confirming that Ringo is so good at heart and Linda seconding this by stating that she's most comfortable around "Ring"
Paul and Mal writing The Long and Winding Road together - McCartney/Evans is the songwriting partnership we could've had but Lennon/McCartney is what we deserve
The banter between John and Paul at the end of She Came In Through The Bathroom Window - Hi Tuesday!
Paul and Linda being extremely cute right in John's eyeline
John creepily mouthing the lyrics to Let It Be
Yoko and Linda bonding over how dumb John and Paul are
Paul McSassney giving Dick James lip
George leaving the band with the same amount of gravitas as someone popping out to get a bottle of milk from the local corner shop
Yoko triumphantly jamming with the band while they channel their inner death metal alter-egos
Yoko screaming "John" while Paul insistently played Martha My Dear in the background - happy thoughts, happy thoughts!
Paul tentatively invading Ringo's personal space, Ringo embracing Paul's invasion and John completing the ménage a trois... while Yoko hung close by awkwardly
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Title: All Kinds of Other
Author: James Sie (Also known as the voice of the cabbage man from Avatar: The Last Airbender! Not kidding, the VA for the cabbage man is a writer!)
Genre: YA Fiction | Romance | Drama | Friendship | LGBTQ+
Content Warnings: Transphobia | Outing
Overall Rating: 9.7/10
Personal Opinion: A transcendent story about two boys who are still figuring out how they fit into the world. They grow and learn about themselves and each other over the course of the book and you will fall in love with them as they fall for one another. 
Couple Classification: Jules X Jack = Jock X Nerd
Do I Own This Book? One day, definitely.
Spoilers Below For My Likes & Dislikes:
Likes:
- Diverse characters all with a varying degree of experience in life. But even when they’re clueless about something (i.e. Jules with queer stuff), they go on to learn. Jules stereotyped other gays because he didn’t know anything else despite his own orientation being gay. He learned on his own time that being gay comes in all sorts of shades. Jamal, the captain of the basketball team, is gay and black! Two Latino boys were crowned Homecoming Kings! Lowell… I’m pretty sure is just a generic white gay but he was effeminate. Stereotypical. And that’s just as valid of a way to exist as Jamal. He was happy and comfortable in himself and that’s what’s important. Plus, he has a plus-sized Asian BFF in Lily Cho. We also have the Chinese Gregg Dang and the Indian trans love interest Jack. So much Asian rep and queer rep! And something else that is remarkable is that a lot of them are ignorant but they’re willing to learn. Lowell hadn’t even realized that the GSA wasn’t a safe space for the entire queer community. That Kacey didn’t feel safe there because they’re non-binary and therefore the terms “gay” and “straight” can’t fit them. It was so important of a moment that I think needed to be highlighted.
- The progression of Jules’s and Jack’s relationship was so natural and adorable to watch. While I got a lot of secondhand embarrassment at the start, it was still cute to see them get close. And Jules was just so obvious with the way he got so excited to be near Jack and constantly checking in on him. He dropped like a dozen hints of “Hey, I like boys” hoping that Jack would pick them up and it was hilarious. He reminded me of an eager, playful puppy and I appreciate how that resulted in Jack coming out of his shell more and more over time.
- Gregg and Cecilia are good friends. I mean, Cecilia was on thin ice when Jack had been wrongfully outed but they were supportive of Jules’s crush on another boy and actively and slyly observed them as they got closer together. It was just adorable. Gregg is also such a unique character. He just sort of exists in his own bubble and it’s honestly so funny.
- I love how Jules and Jack put their foot down when both of their parents were being such bigots. Even though Linda was so supportive with the gay thing and was ready to go to war with Bishop for her son, she refused to understand the trans thing. And Jules refused to let her have it. Well, at first he did, but then he learned to do better. Be better. And he came to the realization that his mother would never want to do the same. So I’m glad he got so mad at her even though she was his close ally because she was so disrespectful to someone he really liked. All those invasive questions were just wrong to ask. And she had the gall to act like she wasn’t trying to set Jack off with that whole “obviously he has anger issues.” Good for Jules for not giving her the satisfaction of leaving Jack. Good for Jack for not allowing his father, Rick, to indulge Linda in that bullshit. I feel so bad. Yes, Rick’s been so supportive of his son but it’s the bare minimum to love his son the same no matter what. So it was wrong of Rick to act like his son somehow owed him for what? For accepting his transition? So his son has to just go along with a woman saying he’s a trend? That’s so fucked up. So I’m glad that Jack refused to be guilt tripped and stood his ground. And his dad realized his mistake. As he should.
- Evie finally reaching back in the end to that last Tumblr post that Jack made was so sweet. It was like coming full circle. Since it all started with that Tumblr post. Seeing their story that way was confusing at the beginning but as I kept reading about Jack’s past as Adam, I became attached. It was so emotional and powerful and I am so glad that they’re going to work things out.
- The writing style is gorgeous. That ending, with the POVs joining together? Perfection. It was also just so romantic to see the way they reacted to one another in real time. Every time Jules did something, we got to see how Jack felt about it immediately. They felt safe and loved together and that is the most important thing in any relationship. Just look at when their parents met for that awful dinner. Jules was so unsure of what his mother was thinking but the moment he saw Jack, he felt good. He realized then he loved Jack and it can be as simple as that. It doesn’t have to be complicated because he doesn’t have the body parts that other boys are born with. He loves Jack and that’s all he needs to know.
- When Jules actually took the time to learn more about trans bodies and issues, I was head over heels for him. I mean, he actually watched Jack’s old videos with Evie to figure out what his experience was like. That moment when Jack was in the bathroom removing his binder because it suffocated him while he was asleep was something else. Jules standing outside and asking about it, he proved that he had educated himself. And he even gave Jack his hoodie so that he wouldn’t see too much of his chest. It was so respectful and thoughtful and he was just going about it perfectly. That’s what happens when someone actually educates themselves instead of asking people such horribly invasive questions like Linda did. He also knew Jack didn’t like being touched in a few places. So Jules asked for permission to touch his brow and it may sound really ridiculous, but it was actually so cute.
Dislikes:
- A lot of stuff felt unresolved in the end. Susie misgendered her own brother. It doesn’t matter that she’s going through a rebellion phase or that she felt like she’d lost a built-in best friend because it’s bullshit. It’s not fair to Jack who is trying to be himself. I feel like they needed to talk things out more before the conclusion of the book but I suppose that’s a thing you do in person, not over Skype.
- Speaking of unresolved, I feel like Cecilia owed Jules and Jack an apology for the shit she said.
- And Dhyllin. I’m assuming Jules cut him out of his social circle completely. To be honest, that was probably the direction their friendship was leading to. He’s such a dick and he was barely in the book! That’s how you know a character’s an ass. When they’re barely in the book and yet the few times they show up, they’re straight up nasty. Honestly, it’s no wonder why Jack thought he was the one who sent out the video. It is absolutely the type of douche move he would do under the guise of “looking out” for Jules. It also made me so happy when Jules snapped at him about the fact that being gay isn’t solely about dick. Fuck that notion.
- And Dhyllin. I’m assuming Jules cut him out of his social circle completely. To be honest, that was probably the direction their friendship was leading to. He’s such a dick and he was barely in the book! That’s how you know a character’s an ass. When they’re barely in the book and yet the few times they show up, they’re straight up nasty. Honestly, it’s no wonder why Jack thought he was the one who sent out the video. It is absolutely the type of douche move he would do under the guise of “looking out” for Jules. It also made me so happy when Jules snapped at him about the fact that being gay isn’t solely about dick. Fuck that notion.
- Holy shit, Linda is the worst. I was actually with her at the start because she was going to go to war for her son when she thought people were bullying him for his sexuality. She couldn’t extend that same grace to a trans kid though. Because she refused to understand it. She misgendered him constantly and “blamed” the parents for the way they raised Jack because children cannot “choose” to do that to their bodies apparently. Fuck her. And on the flip side, respect to Jack’s mom for going around the block to re-introduce her son and glaring at every person to make sure they knew his new name and presentation. Or else. What a badass.
- I was going to be mad at Kacey but I get it. They were scared of being alone. It’s terrifying. You see your savior at school and it’s like they’ve changed too and it feels heartbreaking. I’ve come to another realization too. This was a lesson to Jack. That outing a person without their permission is never okay because he made the same mistake with Evie. He outed her to her dad by mistake and put her in a very dangerous situation. One that involved her hair being cut and her clothes being shredded. He realized it because of what Kacey did to him. Obviously, it’s not a good thing that it happened at all but it’s good that everyone learned this. So it doesn’t happen again to someone who might not be able to survive it like Evie and Jack did.
- Fuck Gavin Miller. That’s it.
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Hey Carmen.😀
For the ask game: dahlia, marigold, orchid and hydrangea for Randall?
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I gotta go with the obvious, the one that his tag came from
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Any one where he's sitting.
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Maybe it's weird, but I think the way he sits is cute 🥺
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Yes, he's my favorite character. Dean Hardscrabble from Monsters University is a close second because I may or may not have a crush on her, even though centipedes terrify me
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Before I do, let me just say that I have more heart cells than brain cells, so I'll add any love song I hear to my self-ship playlists. Also, quite a few of them are explicit. More than I thought, anyway 🤣
El Sueño - Linda Ronstadt
Just The Two Of Us - Grover Washington Jr.
Don't Go Breaking My Heart - Elton John and Kiki Dee
Can You Feel The Love Tonight? - Elton John
The World - Brad Paisley
That's What I Like - Bruno Mars
My Boyfriend's Back - The Angels
Poison - Alice Cooper
Monster - Lady Gaga
Teeth - Lady Gaga
I'm A Believer - The Monkees
Deeper Than The Holler - Randy Travis
I Touch Myself - The Divinyls
Fast Cars And Freedom - Rascal Flatts
To Know Him Is To Love Him - Dolly Parton, Linda Ronstadt, and Emmylou Harris
Dreaming Of You - Selena
Paparazzi - Lady Gaga
More Than Words/ Heaven Isn't Too Far Away - Julianne Hough and Diego Boneta
Without Question - Elton John
I Love You For Sentimental Reasons - Linda Ronstadt
Can You Feel The Love Tonight - Lion King Soundtrack
Right Here Waiting - Richard Marx
Summer Nights - Grease Soundtrack
Unchained Melody - The Righteous Brothers
My Baby Loves Me - Martina McBride
The Real You - Three Days Grace
Happy Together - The Turtles
The Name Of The Game - ABBA
Crazy He Calls Me - Natalie Cole
Suki Suki Daisuki - Jun Togawa
Can't Help Falling In Love - Elvis Presley
Peppermint Creams - Ninja Sex Party
Flawless - Studio Killers
All I Ask Of You - Patrick Wilson and Emmy Rossum
Is This Love? - Bob Marley
Somebody Like You - Keith Urban
Total Eclipse Of The Heart - Bonnie Tyler
The Shoop Shoop Song - Betty Everett
Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You - Frankie Valli
Ain't No Woman (Like The One I Got) - Four Tops
Mambo No. 5 (A Little Bit Of Monica) - Lou Bega
Love Is A Crime - Anastacia
Just The Way You Are - Bruno Mars
The Way You Look Tonight - Tony Bennett
How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved By You) - James Taylor
Let's Get It On - Marvin Gaye
Fever - Varrick Frost and Lawrence Lea
I Got You, Babe - Sonny and Cher
Breathe - Faith Hill
(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman - Aretha Franklin
Jake + Olive - Mac Lethal
My Girl - The Temptations
Digital Love - Daft Punk
For Once In My Life - Stevie Wonder
I Want To Know What Love Is - Tom Cruise and Malin Ackerman
The Way You Love Me - Faith Hill
Flowers and Beads - Iron Butterfly
At Last - Etta James
I Can't Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch) - Four Tops
Just One Look - Linda Ronstadt
(What A) Wonderful World - Sam Cooke
Glory Of Love - Ninja Sex Party
Kiss From A Rose - Seal
Heart Boner (Part II Of The Boner Trilogy) - Ninja Sex Party
Te Amo Y Más - Gustavo Santaolalla and Diego Luna
Quiereme Mucho - Linda Ronstadt
I Love You Too Much - Gustavo Santaolalla and Diego Luna
Creep - Radiohead
Someday, We'll Be Together - Diana Ross
True Colours - Studio Killers
In Der Stille Der Nacht - OOMPH!
I Put A Spell On You - Queen Latifah
Time Of Dying - Three Days Grace
Kiss From A Rose - Dan Avidan and the Super Guitar Brothers
Closer - Nine Inch Nails
Reunited - Peaches & Herb
Lonely Rolling Star - Gamechops
Waterloo - ABBA
T.L.C. A.S.A.P. - Alabama
Stirb Nicht Vor Mir (Don't Die Before I Do) - Rammstein
...Baby One More Time - Britney Spears
Rock You Like A Hurricane - Julianne Hough and Tom Cruise
FYI I Wanna F Your A - Ninja Sex Party
Endless Love - Lionel Richie and Diana Ross
All My Life - Linda Ronstadt and Aaron Neville
Can't Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon
Te Quiero Dijiste - Linda Ronstadt
Thanks for the ask, @goldie90 ^^
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McLennon: Soulmates❤
@beatles-slash-fiction Here It Is!!
(Soulmate AU where when your soulmate speaks to you for the first time the words appear on their body)
Tw: Homophobia, Slurs, swear words
Paul shifts around in the car as his dad drives them to the beach, they've been in the car for hours now and it's getting uncomfortably cramped in the back with the bags and his younger brother. Mike, his younger brother is bouncing around in his seat touching the words on his arm, "You're pants are on fire" was what Mike's soulmate Jennifer told him a few months ago and Mike couldn't get over the fact that he met his soulmate.
Paul on the other hand felt nervous, he's older far more experienced and he's almost eighteen! And what does he have? Nothing! Why does his baby brother have to find a soulmate before he does? Usually the older sibling would find their mate before the little sibling would, why now was it different?
Paul closes his eyes and pictures his soulmate what she looks like. Beautiful blond hair with beautiful green eyes and adorable splatter of freckles across her nose. She'll have big caring eyes and will be Paul's best friend and his wife. She would be thin and fit perfectly in his arms, she'll love cuddles and kisses. Long walks on the beach and she would be slightly taller than him. His soulmate will wants of dogs mostly little sheep dogs with long fur. And they'll live on a farm far away from his father maybe they'll live in Scotland.
Some days he wished Linda was his soulmate she was the cute girl from his home economics class she was his dream girl but they weren't soulmates. Her soulmate was this nerdy boy named Richie he has a big nose and sad eyes. They are very happy together but Paul keeps longing for her.
They arrive at the beach, "Paul wake up!" Mike screams in Paul's ear disturbing him from his daydream.
"Goddamn it, Micheal." Paul hisses earning a pop in the from their father James,
"You do not use God's name in vain." he reminds them.
They arrive at the beach and James McCartney gets them a nice spot not to close to the water but just right, "Alright, Paul, sunscreen time." James held up the bottle.
Paul huffs and let's his father lather him in the sunscreen all over his body where ever bare skin was it was coated thickly in sunscreen, "Micheal it's your turn." James faces him,
"I want to burn, pa!" Mike yells taking off running,
James sighs, "Paul go get your brother."
"But-"
His father steps forward hand raised, "Did I stutter, James?"
Paul flinches and shakes his head, "Good," his father says, "Now after, Micheal. If he gets the faintest hint of a sunburn you're arse is going to be tanned. Understand?"
Paul nods and runs after him dodging small children and other beach goers. He ducks and dodges the birds. His feet burn with the sand. Paul chases after his brother his fingers so  close to grabbing Mike's yellow swim shorts when Paul accidently steps on John's towel and knocks over John's umbrella. John shouts,  "Hey, dick for brains! Watch it!"
And John watches in horror as the words sprawl across Paul's chest and all Paul can say is, "S-Sorry, sir."
And John can feel the tingling of the words sprawling onto his arm and he knows Paul knows what's on his chest and the only thing he can think of is to ask, "Do you want a drink?" and reaches for a beer in his cooler.
Paul sits down on the towel hugging his knees he accepts the beer, "So?" Paul takes a sip and scrunched his face up at the taste making John chuckle,
"Yeah you have 'dicks for brains' on your chest now.'' John looks down, "Sorry about that. I've been drinking too much."
Paul touches his chest feeling the words warmed by the sun, "My pa's going to freak. He wanted me with a good Christan girl."
John grabs two beach balls that he had and puts them on his chest, "I can be a girl if you want. Look at my big bodonkers."
Paul snorts and hands John back his beer, "So, soulmate?" John looks at him, "How about I buy you down dinner since we're going to be stuck together for life?"
John grins, "Yeah, I would like that."
"Great." Paul stands up and dusts the sand off his shorts, "I'll meet you at Lunar's pier at 6."
John nods, "Okay, dick for brains."
Paul shakes his head rolling his eyes grinning, "And if there's two fellas waiting for you, my name's Paul."
And then he was gone leaving John alone on the beach only the rushing waters was the only thing John hears and the talking of other beach goers, he couldn't wait for his date with Paul.
Paul is shaking when he gets back to his father. Mike has a large bruise on his back from where their father him, "Paul you didn't catch him." James' voice was cold, "Can you do anyth-"
"He found his soulmate!" Mike points out the words on Paul's chest, "Who's the lucky girl?"
James' eyes narrow and he reads the words, ''No girl would have such a foul mouth. Paul is a poof, a nasty little faggot."
Mike gasps and backs up he looks at Paul like Paul's  going to hump him, "I can't believe I let you see me change!"
Paul whimpers this was hurting him, "Mike you're my brother. I can't see you like that. I love you but only like brothers."
"You're disgusting." James growls, "Put a shirt on I'm not letting anyone see that my son is stuck with a faggot."
Paul puts a shirt on and is forced to sit under the umbrella doing nothing if he moves his father hits his back and head. Paul looks at his watch and reads its 5:30PM with James distracted and Mike in the water, Paul flees to Lunar's Pier. He was a disgusting sinful mess, he knew that but at least he had his soulmate.
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shannygoatgruff · 4 years
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Grown & SeXY - Chapter 1
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Header made by the talented @flowers-in-your-hayr
For @youbloodymadgenius for your 400 Followers Writing Challenge.  Congrats on your success!
Genre:  Romance/Comedy
Pairing:  Modern Ivar x Mature OC
Warning: Language/mild angst/Sexual content
Rating: M
Summary: A relationship between Generations X & Y will help this XX & XY learn a lot about themselves, each other, and love.  Cougar/cub relationships aren’t always just about a midlife crisis and arm candy.
A/N:  I got the concept for this story from a conversation I was having with @youbloodymadgenius.  I hope I do it justice.  This story is for you!
Chapter 1 
Oh, hey girl, hey!
Chile, do I have some tea to spill!  
This tea is piping hot, lemon-honey, tea with a hint of peppermint; that’s how good it is.  I have been keeping this in for so long, I’m surprised a bitch hasn’t bit her tongue off trying to keep quiet.  But, I have to talk to somebody about this, and I trust you, girl. We’ve been good girlfriends for a long time now. I know you’re not going to say anything to anybody, right?  I didn’t think so. I knew you were cool.
Okay, so before we begin I need to lay some ground rules. I don’t want to get into this and all of sudden you start feeling some type of way or something, or there be some sort of misunderstanding that we could have settled right here in the beginning.  You know how some people get all uppity and shit. 
First, I’m not a writer - I’m a storyteller and there’s a big fucking difference. Writers, write; they use language as an art form, and shit like grammar and diction is important to them and they usually use them pretty accurately.  Storytellers, like me?  We don’t give a fuck. We paint pictures by speaking the language of the people, so that the bitches in the back can understand what the fuck is going on.  
So, if you don’t want to know about how a bad-ass cougar found herself hooked up with a fucking snack-tastic cub from someone who doesn’t give a fuck all about ending a sentence with a preposition, then, honey, feel free to read something else. If my language is a bit too common or colorful for you, then mayhaps, I could recommend some really well-written Shakespearean Sonnets or the like, by some other real writers.  But if you just want to dish and hear some good shit, then bitch, do I have some gossip to tell you!
Okay, next, the story I’m about to tell you is true. This shit is real and it happened to me my friend.  So, to protect my good girlfriend, I’m going to change the names of the mofos involved. If that means the names of these folks sound made up, it’s because bitch, they are! It’s not like where we live is all that big. You might actually know some of these people and the last thing I want is for you to go run-and-tell-that I said some shit, about so-and-so, when I really didn’t, because I said something else about some bitch that I made up.  
Um, what else?  Oh yeah, everything I’m going to tell you is the gospel, according to me. Even if I wasn’t there, I have been working, like fucking Luther out here in these streets, to piecing this shit together and this is the only version that makes sense.  So if you disagree, fine...fight me.  But you better not ask them; that’s all I know.  We’ve already established the good girlfriend code of conduct. Right?  
Now, if any of this shit starts to sound familiar to you just nod your head and play along.  If you happen to see these people in real-life, just keep going about your business, like you don’t know anything.  Don’t give them a side-eye, or raise the obligatory eyebrow when you see them.  Definitely don’t be like that bitch Shelly that time I told her that stuff about Erik and Angie.  Do you know that bitch put everybody on blast and was like, “I knew he looked the type to eat booty,” all loud and shit in the Target.  
You can’t be telling the church’s business to the entire Target like that!  You are supposed to see them in the store, nod, and keep it fucking moving.  What I’m telling you ain’t nobody’s business and they definitely don’t need to know that you know all the shit that went down with them. You know what?  Matter of fact, I’m going to send you a non-disclosure contract in your email.  Just sign it and send it back. I don’t want zero problems, big fella.
Okay, now that we got the formalities out of the way, and everybody knows how the fuck to act, what’s next?  Why am I giving you the gossip?  I’m doing this shit to save your life, bitch because I care.  See, this is a story about being grown and sexy.  Yes, bitch!  Say it again!  GROWN & SEXY!!!  And we all will be grown and sexy, one day.
I know, you probably think grown & sexy means all about getting the “D”. Well, it is…but not really.  Don’t get me wrong, we’re going to get to that. There will be plenty of pipe laid.  How the hell can you be grown & sexy without some feel good? But, it’s about a movement - a way of life.  It’s a phase you go through when you get to a point where you are living your best life and just don’t give a fuck anymore.  
Listen Linda, this story here, isn’t just about sex, it’s about timing.  See, look at all the young bitches, rolling their eyes. They just want to hit it and quit it. I can’t with them.  I’m not even addressing them and their foolishness.  In fact, all the young bitches, y’all can feel free to exit - stage left, please.  
The rest of us, that are past all that thotting and trotting, we know that the universe has a fucked up sense of humor and it only gives us these short ass life spans, filled with teeny-tiny windows of opportunity to cram all of this amazing shit into. Then, on one side, we have one cosmic force presenting something fantastic, while another on the other side, there is another force that throws mad shade.  Of course, we pay attention to the shady shit and usually miss out on that brief moment of something that could have made us really fucking happy.  Don’t worry, I’m not about to start talking about astrology, or reading crystals.  Besides my horoscope, I don’t know what any the fuck any of that means.   
What it means to what the fuck I’m talking about is, this could be considered a cautionary tale about missed opportunities, or being so wrapped up in your own bullshit that you can’t see a good thing when it was right in front of you.  It’s definitely about family, growing up, acceptance and happiness; about finding and loving yourself and then being able to show that love to someone else.  
Of course, you can’t have all that good shit without the bad. So, let’s see…I’ll throw in some insecurities, doubt, utter stupidity, realizing that just because something looks and feels good, doesn’t mean it’s right.  Hell, my story this story, may even be about having to break your own heart to save someone else’s. Ah, we’ll see if I can actually get to that part. It’s not I got all damn day, you know?
So…where do I begin?  
Oh, okay.  You know that club, Bottom’s Up, on the corner of Fourth and Lexington?  The one with that has the pool tables on the upper level and that cute little Karaoke room?  Well that’s where all this shit started… 
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There were a lot of people at Bottom’s Up for a Wednesday night. 
Ivar already had an attitude because he was late.  He knew that showing up even a few minutes late for the weekly pool game with his siblings meant that he wouldn’t get to pick his opponent and if he got stuck playing against Bjorn one more time, he was going to quit showing up to these fucking games all together. 
He hated playing Bjorn.  No matter what he tried, he could never beat his oldest brother. Most of the time, he never even got a chance to get his cue on the table when he played against him.  If he had any other sibling as his opponent, he stood a fair chance of winning, but he was sure that Bjorn cheated.  It was enough to piss him off just thinking about it.
Ivar glanced at the small landing where the pool tables were and saw the five varying shades of blonde hair just as the top of the stairs.  Damn, they were all already there.  They had probably already picked games, meaning he was going to have another shitty night at shooting pool. There went his chance of getting back the money Sigurd took off of him last week.  He needed that money, too.  He was running low on gas and his brakes started making a loud squeaking sound this morning.  Now, if he could just play against Ubbe...he knew for sure he could double their bet and make all of his money back, and then some.  
Deciding to get a drink before he met his family upstairs, he made his way to the bar, and signaled for the bartender.  While he waited he carefully tried to remove his jacket without bumping into anyone.  Where the fuck did all these people come from?  They had been coming to this lounge for a few months and on Wednesdays there were never more than 25 people in there.  It wasn’t like it was wall-to-wall people in there now, but it was definitely enough to make him feel annoyed.  
Plus, all those extra people were making it hot in there. Maybe he shouldn’t have worn a long sleeve t-shirt, after all.  But with all the rain and cold nights, lately, he wasn’t quite sure how to dress.  The shirt, a thin pale blue cotton, was a deep V-neck, showing the top of his muscular pecs and just a hint of his shoulder tat that trailed over to the center of his chest, was tucked lazily into the front of his distressed, blue jeans and left hanging out of the back.  A pair of brown Timberland shoes completed his outfit, giving him that ‘I’m not trying too hard to look like I’m trying to look good’, look.  Believe me, he wore it well.  
“What can I get you?”  The bartender asked walking over to where Ivar stood, pouring beers from the tap for other patrons further down the bar.
“Can I get a Jame…,” As soon as he started talking he heard a feminine voice coming from his left. He stopped mid-sentence and looked to see where the voice was coming from, “Oh, I’m sorry,” he said smiling at the shorter woman next to him.  When she turned her head toward him and offered him a smile, his posture changed. “I didn’t see you.  Please, go ahead.”
She raised her brows and continued smiling at him, “Thanks.”  Man, he was a cutie, but she was sent to the bar for drinks, not dicks.  Turning back to face the bartender, she restarted her order, “Um, I need a Johnny Walker Blue, a Malibu and Pineapple, and a Captain & Diet.”  She turned back to him and bowed, a sign for him to continue with his order.
“I’ll just take a Jameson,” Ivar told the bartender.  When he turned back to the woman, he noticed she had turned away from him and was looking at her phone.  As casually as he could, he leaned his head to the side to get a look at her full body.  She couldn’t have been more than 5’3”, even with the heel on those boots. She had a great complexion, the chartreuse wrap shirt with bell sleeves brought the olive tones out in her caramel skin and softened her chocolate eyes.  And of course, Ivar wondered how in the hell did a woman with an ass and hips that size and a waist that small, found jeans that fit.  He found himself raising his brow at the thought.   
This was awkward.  He wanted to say something to her, but she didn’t seem to notice that he was even standing there.  He couldn’t remember a time in recent history when a woman didn’t notice him, or when he had to start a conversation. What exactly was he supposed to say, anyway?  If he wasn’t drunk or being pursued, he wasn’t quite sure how this was supposed to go.  
Just why wasn’t she trying to talk to him, anyway?  He looked good tonight, he just got his hair cut and this was a new shirt. The silver herringbone necklace and the pale blue of his shirt, made his eyes look more of a steel blue, which he thought was the most attractive on him.  He smelled good - he had taken some cologne out of his father’s bathroom and claimed it as his own.  It smelled good on his dad, so he knew it smelled good on him.  What the hell was this lady’s problem?
“I’m sorry, but I think I know you from somewhere.”  The woman spoke, pulling Ivar out of his head for a moment.  When he turned to face her, she was facing him with her hand on her hip and her brows were knitted together, as she tried to think. “Oh my God, that sounded like a line, didn’t it? I swear, it’s not. You just look so familiar.”
Ivar chuckled.  For a minute there he thought he was losing his touch.  “No, it doesn’t sound like a line at all.”  He easily rested his arm on the bar, as he turned to face her, shortening the distance them. “I’m sure I would remember meeting someone as beautiful as you before.” 
Her eyes widened uncomfortably, as she tried to take a half step back before she bumped into the stool next to her.  She turned to see what she had bumped into before turning back to him.  He was cute and all, but that’s not why she started talking to him.  What was with guys these days? “Aww, thanks. That’s really sweet, but…”
“I’m sure, not half as sweet as you are,” Ivar licked his bottom lip, and his long lashes blinked over his beautiful blue eyes, momentarily catching her off guard.  
“Oh, honey,” she dared to reach out and touch him.  Damn, he had a nice arm. She could feel the large expanse of his bicep flex under her hand as her fingers drummed against it, “I’m sure I have shoes older than you.” 
Ivar shrugged.  What did that have to do with anything?  “You’re only as old as you feel…”
“Hey,” Another masculine voice came from behind them, followed by a swift smack to the back of Ivar’s head, “you buying for everyone?” Ivar rolled his eyes before he turned around to face his brother. Narrowing his eyes at the older, taller man, he cursed the fact that they were related. 
“Oh. My. God!”  The woman next to Ivar said shifting her weight to one hip with a huge smile on her face. If Ivar thought she was pretty before, she was absolutely beautiful when she gave a genuine smile. “Bjorn Ragnarsson?” 
“Soli?”  Bjorn made this weird groaning sound as he bent down and picked the small woman up from the floor, wrapping her in a bear hug.  “Oh my, God!  I haven’t seen you in forever.  How have you been?”
Who the hell was this woman and how the hell did she know his brother? Ivar stood back watching the scene unfold and tried to stop his lip from curling. “I’m good!  We just moved back a little over a year ago.  How are you, BJ?  How’s your family?”
“We’re good.  My parents are still in the neighborhood.”  Bjorn tried his best not to smile at the look on Ivar’s face, “Everybody else is doing fine.  And I see you’ve found Baby Ivey here?”’ 
“Nooooooo!” she shrieked, cheeks turning red, “This is Baby Ivey?” She held her hand down by her knee to the height she remembered him as a toddler, then looking up at the sexy man that towered over her now, “Little Ivar Ragnarsson…well fuck me.  That’s why you look so familiar.”  This time she patted his thigh in what she hoped was in a platonic fashion. “I know you don’t remember me, but I was really good friends with your sister.”  She chuckled when he shook his head, “I think you went to school with my son, too. Miguel Larson.” 
Miguel Larson?  Who the hell was Miguel Larson?  The only Larson he knew from high school was this annoying, skinny kid who was into anime… “Wait, Mani Larson?”  No fucking way.  Did she just nod?  She was Mani Larson’s mom?  Mani Larson was only like two years younger than him.  What was happening here?  There was no way in hell that this woman had a kid his age.  
“Yeah, bro.  Me, Soli & Gyda all went to high school together.  She even turned me down when I asked her to my senior prom.” Bjorn placed his hand over his heart and pouted his lip as if he was hurt.  
Shaking her head, Soli reached over and squeezed Bjorn’s chest as he flexed under his shirt for her.  She opened her mouth in shock and appreciation, “Oh, my God.  I know right?  How drunk was I? What the fuck was wrong with me?”
Could Bjorn’s grin get any bigger?  He was enjoying this.  He could read Ivar’s body language from upstairs when he saw him at the bar.  He just knew from the way he was standing down there, that instead of being upstairs with the family, his brother was trying to push up on some girl at the bar. That’s the only reason that he came downstairs to fuck with him.  But, not only did Bjorn get to run into an old friend, he also got to cock-block his little brother. The gods were smiling on him today. “Soli and Gyda were cheerleaders when I was on the football team.”
“How is Gyda?” Soli asked, turning to the bar to push her drinks closer to her and slide the bartender her credit card.  She missed the little eye exchange between the brothers in the process.
Bjorn turned around to scan the raised platforms where the pool tables were, “She’s here, actually.  We come here for our weekly pool game.  She would die to see you.”
“Okay.  Let me take this stuff over to my girls, and I’ll come up and find you guys in a few.”  Hugging him one more time and squeezing his arms for good measure, Soli shook her head in disbelief, “I can’t believe I ran into you, BJ.  It’s so good to see you.”  She turned around to face Ivar who was standing there watching his brother and what he had hoped was going to be his conquest for the evening chatting it up like two girlfriends, “It was nice to see you again, too, Ivar.”  She wasn’t sure if she should be embarrassed for him, or humiliated for herself, at the moment. 
“Yeah, you too, Mrs. Larson.”  Mrs. Larson…what the fuck?  He just wanted to leave out the bar and come back in to start the night over.
She held up a finger to him to stop him from calling her that hideous name, “I haven’t been Mrs. Larson in a very long time.  I’m just Marisol,”  She tilted her head in such a way that her hair covered part of her face hiding her blush. “But you can call me, Sonni, or Soli.  Whatever,” she shrugged, and tucked her top lip between teeth at the sight of his smile.    
Why were they making these young boys so goddamn cute these days? If they didn’t stop, or if she didn’t get laid soon, she was going have to call the people on herself.  She had known this boy when he was an infant.  
That meant he was around her son’s age, and Mani was what 21-22? So Ivar was born right around the time she graduated from high school?  That was illegal somewhere, right?  Yeah, he was of age. But, whose age?  Mani’s? Oh that was just nasty.  
What the hell did she have in common with a boy that young? Hot, sweaty, animal sex… but other than that?  She was so past that stage in her life.  
No, what she was going to do was go back to her table and enjoy her happy hour, and just before she left for the night, she would go up and see Gyda. She would be staying far the fuck away from this little snack, right there.  She was not going to allow herself to think about whether or not he was old enough to have chest hair, yet, or what that clean-shaven face felt like rubbing against her thighs. 
Ivar could have sworn he swore he saw Soli blush, as she collected her drinks and made her way back to her corner of the lounge.  What in the hell just happened?  Fucking Bjorn, “You dick,” Ivar grabbed his drink and followed behind his brother up the stairs, “What the fuck was that?  She turned me down for the prom…”
Bjorn laughed his way up toward the three tables he and his siblings commandeered.  “You big mad, bro?”  He grabbed his little brother by the shoulders and squeezed lovingly.  Parading Ivar in front of his siblings, he patted his cheek like a child, “I did you a favor.  She would break your heart, balls, and everything else. That, my friend, is not for you.” He turned Ivar to face the direction of Soli’s table, of which they had a clear view. “Guys, Lil’ Man here, thinks he can handle Marisol Peña,”  Bjorn pointed in the direction of the petite, curvy brunette, dancing at the table, sipping on a cocktail through a straw.
“Sonni? My Marisol?” Gyda asked, turning to look at Ivar, “Ivey, Sonni’s my age.”
Bjorn nodded, “Exactly. That, is a grown-ass woman.  You, are still a young Thunder Cat.”
“You sure about that?”  Were they all fucking crazy?  Did they know about him? There was a reason he earned the moniker Ivar “The Boneless” in college: when his third leg came out, that shit was 100% pure muscle! If he was given the chance, he would fuck that forty-something-year-old woman back into her twenties. “Just because you ain’t never had no game, don’t mean that I don’t.”
“Bitch, please,” Bjorn said picking up his beer taking a big swallow. “You ain’t had pussy, since it had you.”
Ivar could feel himself getting irritated. It was Bjorn’s fault that he was sitting up there being heckled by them instead of at the bar still talking to Soli.  Plus, he hated when he was the butt of their jokes and they were all laughing at him. Even Hvitserk was smiling around his hot wings, and he could tell Ubbe was trying to keep a straight face. The only one who wasn’t laughing was Gyda, but she was too busy shooting Bjorn a look that pleaded with him to stop teasing him.    
“Beege…you married every bitch you fucked.  That ain’t game, brah.  That’s being a whipped, bitch.”  Ivar raised his glass to his brother before slamming the entire drink down his throat. “Now are we gonna play or what?”  Grabbing a pool cue off the wall rack, and rolled his eyes. “I’m calling game…Ubbe? You feel like getting your ass beat?” 
For the rest of the night, he tried to act disinterested in what was going on at the table below them, but the truth was every so often, he found himself glancing down to the floor to see if she was still down there or if she was finally on her way up to where they were sitting.  There were quite a few times where they caught each other’s eye, peeking over the railing to see if what the other one was doing.  Each time it happened, they would both smile and turn away.
Ivar didn’t know what it was about her that had him so interested. Maybe it was because no one thought that he could, or maybe it was just because she was beautiful.  Whatever it was, she was a challenge, and he liked it.  This wasn’t going to be the last time Ivar talked to Soli.  He was going to make sure of that.
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Alright, so there you have it.  That’s how we they met.  I know, it was just enough to wet your whistle, but I’m just going to let you chew on that tasty little tidbit for a minute. You know I gotta leave you wanting to come back for more, honey...
But seriously, though, I gotta run.  But, we’re going to talk again soon. I gotta tell you about what happened when Marisol told her son that she ran into Ivar. Chiiiillllleeee....  
Master List
Chapter 2
Tags: @youbloodymadgenius @idea-garden @kol--mikaelson @mooniemouse @didiintheblog @waiting4inspiration @tempt-ress @where-beauty-goes-to-die @crazyaboutmotleycrue @oddsnendsfanfics @geekandbooknerd @ivarthebloodyking @honestsycrets   @xbellaxcarolinax  @zuxiezendler @inforapound​  
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doyouever-daydream · 4 years
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I’m every woman.
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A/N So today is the International Women’s Day and I felt inspired to write something, I tried to incorporate as many women that appeared on Criminal Minds but failed to include them all. I’m going to start writing reader insert imagines for my CM Bingo prompts so SSA y/n y/l makes her first appearance here. 
Today I’ll be attending my first Women’s March so that obvioulsy inspired this imagine, if any of you are going to the Women’s March please be safe and thank you for taking the streets and suppporting the cause (the current situation in my country is pretty fucked up so this year is even more important to me to try and do anything I can so women can have the same rights as any human being)
English is not my first language and although I love writing and spent most of my teenage years writing fanfiction, everything I wrote was in Spanish so it took me years to finally decide to post my writing in another language, I’m still super insecure but I want to share it so, apologies for any mistakes (also it is currently 3:00 AM so I am practically writing with my eyes closed), I believe it is important for women to speak up and take actions so they can be heard and there are equal rights so that’s how this imagine was inspired. Also these female characters have inspired me as a woman so I hope you can enjoy this! 
Warnings: I mean I don’t think this qualifies as warning but talks of feminism
Word count: 2201
“I’m every woman, it’s all in me, anything you want done baby, I’ll do it naturally.”
It was a Saturday night and Chaka Khan’s song played in the background at Penelope’s and Luke’s apartment, it was a special girl’s night, all of them, even Kristy was there while Matt and Luke baby sat the kids.
“Wine and sign making? This is my kind of girl’s night!” Garcia was ecstatic that all of them were going to the Women’s March.
“I know! Although I’m not sure I’m creative enough to do this” JJ stared at her blank poster.
“Come on, JJ, you can do this! Put feminist AF” Emily was already a little tipsy and was clueless as to what her sign would say but she was excited.
“Actually yeah, I think something like that will be fine, what about you, Tara?” JJ looked at Tara who looked as if she was struggling to decide.
“I don’t know, there’s so much I would like to say but unfortunately I can’t write an entire sermon”
“Same, girl, I’m so torn up, not only about what to write but how to decorate, Garcia here has like a million of art supplies we could use, I’m about to turn up a 9 year old and put glitter on all of your signs.” y/n grabbed one of Garcia’s boxes an eyed the glitter selection her dear friend pulled out.
“YES! Glitter and colors and stickers and ugh, I love you y/n, let’s throw biodegradable glitter as a protest!” Penelope hugged y/n while the rest of the gang decided what to put.
“I’ll need your help with Chloe’s and Lily’s signs! So Penelope and y/n, unleash all of your creativity on her signs” y/n smirked.
“I already know what I’ll write for one of them, tell me what you think, girls just wanna have fun” She paused “…damental human rights”
“I HATE YOU, you should’ve told me to put that” JJ teased.
“I’ll be honest and say that I saw it on instagram but thought it would be cute to put it on one of the girl’s sign.” y/n confessed while she started drawing on her poster.
“She’s drawing already, man, I wish I was as artsy as you are” Tara tried to see what she was drawing but couldn’t make a figure just yet.
“Oh, oh, OH, I got it, y/n will not be the only one using music” JJ started writing on her poster “Check this out” She lifted up her poster that read ‘ok, ladies, now let’s get in formation’.
“I still think you should add my idea” Emily laid comfortably in Penelope’s couch while seeing her friends work on her signs and siping on her glass of wine. “We should’ve brought donuts”
“Oh, I can call someone to pick up some” Penelope already had her phone and was, apparently, sending a text.
“Who else is coming? I thought it was only us?” y/n asked while she kept drawing.
“I invited an old friend but she only just told me she could make it” Now everyone was eyeing Garcia while she smiled proudly.
“Who? Linda Barnes?” Emily’s sarcasm had everyone laughing.
“Nope, but it’s a surprise, let’s continue please.”
“You know what? I already know what I’m gonna put on mine, back when I worked in San Francisco, I had this really annoying co worker, whose name I can’t remember but he was a pain in the ass that constantly went around joking with everyone in the office about how I had the biggest case of resting bitch face, not only did I have to endure that but also his misogynistic jokes” When Tara finished writing on her poster she showed it to her friends.
Resisting
Bitch
Face.
“I’m gonna decorate the shit out of it now” She proceeded to grab cut outs from magazines that Garcia had.
“I love it Tara, and I love being here with you, thanks for counting me in Penelope” Kristy was happy to hang out with these women that she considered her friends.
“Nonsense, you’re part of the girl power gang, we’re family, now, what do you think about my progress?” Everyone turned to see Garcia’s sign, it read: destroy the patriarchy, not the planet.
“Penelope Grace Garcia, you are perfect” y/n stated and everyone agreed with her.
“It’s totally you.”
“Ah, see? Baby girl is a great feminist and ambientalist” Penelope smiled proudly while she painted flowers.
“You know? I’m inspired, I’m gonna start working on that sign, that is until the donuts arrive” Emily sat straight while she put the glass on Garcia’s coffee table and then went to get her poster.
“I finished mine” Kristy said proudly while she held her sign up: ‘women belong in all places where decisions are being made’
“You are a genius, woman” JJ was in awe of all her friends.
“I love it, Kristy” y/n finally speaked up after being very focused designing her sign “I know I’ve told you this many times but growing up I was a tomboy, I loved playing in the dirt, climbing trees, playing I was a spy, I had bunch of guy friends, I loved, I still love baseball with my life, and other sports, I truly believe ‘all clothes are unisex if you stop being a little bitch about it’ and because of that I’ve had to put up with a million comments about how ‘weird’ I am because despite all of that I also like wearing makeup and other ‘feminine stuff’, I grew up being an ‘enigma’ to some people because I like boy stuff and girls stuff and I always hated when they told me bullshit like that, I always refused to accept there were stuff for girls and boys, now after giving you this lecture as if I was presenting my dissertation, look at my sign”
I eat gender norms for breakfast
y/n accompanied the quote with a drawing of a cereal box adorned with blue and pink glitter.
“SLAY” Emily cheered. “I feel you, y/n, I grew up speaking my mind and sometimes that wasn’t well received because I wasn’t a man, it drove me insane, it still does, as much as the brass wants to believe they are ok with having women in charge, they’re not completely convinced, you know?”
“You are a total boss bitch, and we love you” Tara commented while she raised her glass.
“Yes, Emily Prentiss, one day you’ll be THE boss bitch of the FBI, I know it�� y/n added as the doorbell rang.
“Ooh, my surprise for you is here” Penelope hurried to the door and when she opened it she shrieked in delight when she saw Alex Blake standing there.
“Hello ladies” She entered the apartment and went to say hi to everyone, introducing Kristy to their former teammate, since she was the only one that did not know her, Prentiss had met her before and y/n was also familiar with her as they’ve worked together when y/n worked for the Crisis Negotiation Unit.
“It’s so nice to see you, Alex, how you’ve been?” JJ asked while offering her a glass of wine.
“Great, I am back teaching at Georgetown, James is also teaching there and we’re very happy to be back from Massachusetts”
After catching up with Alex’s life and the rest of them trying to sum up everything the BAU had been through during her absence time flew by quickly.
“I can’t believe you didn’t joined the BAU when I was there, it would’ve been incredible to work with you Tara, you as well, y/n” She smiled fondly at the two women she had known for the longest time out of the rest.
“It’s known to everyone that has worked with me that I learned so much from the both of you, I can’t believe that now you are my friends and here we are, making signs for the Women’s March”
“Hearing you talk about working together at the BAU almost makes me want to join you, girls” Kristy joked “If only the cases you worked weren’t so dark” They all laughed.
“There have been incredible ladies in that unit” y/n admired the women that had been before.
“I remember when Elle Greenaway joined the BAU boys club and I wasn’t so lonely during our cases anymore”
“I miss Elle so much” Garcia sighed while she reminisced on her friend that grew apart from them.
“I never got to work with her during her time in the Bureau but I heard she was a badass” y/n said wondering what had happened to her.
“She was” JJ added.
“Talking about awesome BAU ladies, the other day I saw Jordan, remember her?” Emily looked at Penelope and JJ.
“No way! I haven’t seen her since she came to our rescue when I was on maternity leave”
“I’ve seen her a couple times, she’s worked her way up, I think she’s also unit chief but I can’t remember which unit, she also has an adorable son, once we bumped into each other and showed me some pictures”
“Ashley Seaver also worked briefly with the BAU, didn’t she?” y/n asked.
“Oh yeah, Seaver! She was nice” Emily said.
“Reid had a crush on her” And as soon as those words came out of Penelope’s mouth she regretted them, she didn’t want to make y/n uncomfortable, not that y/n and Reid were anything but Garcia knew they were pining for each other but were too stubborn to act on their feelings.
“I know her, we’re not friends friends but I like her very much, we have some mutual friends, she’s married now, still working for the FBI at a field office” y/n said making a mental note to call her soon.
“Isn’t it amazing knowing how many women are kicking ass in their jobs and making our country a better place?” Kristy said.
“You’re a part of that change Kristy, you should’ve worked at the FBI”
“Oh no, just one FBI agent is enough in our family but thank you for the trust, now I need ideas for the girls signs, y/n has already helped me with one but I still have one to go”
“What about fight like a girl? Matt has told me how much Lily loves Taekwondo” JJ suggested.
“Actually that’s perfect” Kristy went to write that on the poster her little girl would be holding during the march.
“You know, tomorrow Lily and Chloe will not be alone, Kate is bringing Kelly along with her and Meg.”
“I wished she was here” JJ really wanted to see Kate, it had been a while since she had seen her.
“She had to cancel last minute, poor Kelly has a stomach bug” Penelope lamented their friend couldn’t joined them.
“Alex, do you know what you’re putting on your sign?” Tara questioned.
“Actually yeah, I’ve thought about it all the way here, let me get on with it so we can help you clean and then we continue talking?”
They all agreed and went to finish their signs, after a half an hour later they were all done.
It’s time to ovary-act.
“I’m telling you I live surrounded by incredible women, ugh, I love all of you, mis mujeres” Penelope had learned a few Spanish from Luke.
“I couldn’t resist a little wordplay, after all I’m a linguist” Alex was proud of her idea as the others reassured her it was witty.
“You know what? I’m not that drunk that I actually thought deeply about mine, but I finally got it, and while I’m not that drunk I’m drunk enough to make a speech so prepare” She stood up straight while everyone turned to see her “All my life, no matter where I lived, men have tried to intimidate me just because I am a woman and I’ve always fought against those dicks that try to tell me what I can and can’t do, even when it came to my own fucking body, they felt entitled to give their opinion, it’s time we show them and our next generations that we will not accept being silenced, we have the right to speak and be heard and we’ll rule the world, mes amis.” She jokingly raised her glass while y/n grabbed Prentiss sign so she could show it to the rest of their friends.
Vulva la résistance
The rest of the girls cheered on Emily, they were now standing beside each other, with their arms resting on their friends shoulders.
JJ and Penelope went back as far as 15 years, 14 with Emily and y/n, apart from Tara and Alex, had only met these incredible women a little over a year but she was amazed by the amount of courage they had, she felt extremely lucky to be surrounded by women that did it all. Absolutely all.
Truth was being a woman in the FBI, hell, being a woman anywhere wasn’t always easy, but having a support network like the one they had created made life a little easier, knowing if anything happened all they had to do was look beside them and there would be another woman lending a helping hand.
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ghostcatsso · 3 years
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We're going to have a memorial for Elizabeth. Alex asked me to meet up with her and ride with her to it.
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I'll happily keep her company.
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As we rode there, she told me about her relationship with Elizabeth.
We'd get into fights more times than I could count. She was always scolding me for being too reckless. And don't get me started on all her stupid rules! Before her I never had that, you know? I know my mom loved us, and tried to provide for five kids as a single mom as best she could, but...it wasn't enough. She wasn't there. I had to figure out how to keep food on the table, how to keep our clothes clean, where to hide the things you cared about so they wouldn't get stolen. I was always bailing James out of trouble but there was no one to catch me when I fell. Until Elizabeth. When I did something stupid, she was the one who picked me up at the station. When I failed, she would tell me to try again. All those rules weren't her trying to make me into someone else. She was helping me be my best self. It was love, and I was too stubborn to see it. Elizabeth was the first person to see me as not just some angry kid raging against the world, but as someone better. Someone who could be a hero.
Poor Alex, she was especially close to Elizabeth. This is so hard on her
We arrived at the funeral and Lisa gave Alex some advice about grieving. I guess she has experience loosing a mother, too.
Time to mingle, see what everyone has to say about Elizabeth.
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Derek asked the soul riders to tell him about Elizabeth, since he didn't really know her.
Linda talked about her knowing better than anyone what it's like to be a soul rider, since she used to be one herself.
Anne said Elizabeth taught her to be herself, even under the pressure of her parents and her family's reputation.
Linda added that she admired that Elizabeth wasn't afraid to show that she didn't have all the answers, but encouraged her to seek them out and learn as much as she can. Even when she was keeping things from us, she was doing it to protect us.
Derek asked if we'll be okay without such a great leader, and we admitted it will be hard but we'll get through this together.
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Herman told stories of Elizabeth first coming to Jorvik. She struggled to learn to ride on just some training horse before she found her Concorde. She was shy and nervous around horses at first, but she loved them as much as anyone filled with the light of Aideen. One day while they were out on a ride, her horse spooked and ran off into the forest with her. Later she returned, having not only stayed on the horse's back, but managed to calm the horse down. Something must've happened out in the forest that day, because ever since then she was an amazing rider.
Herman also talked about Starbreeds and how they often reflect their rider. Soul riders, too, will start to reflect their horses when their bond is strengthened. Every Concorde he's met, and that's three generations now, has beamed with pride. Before Elizabeth met him, she was determined but shy. She would let others take credit for her accomplishments. When she bonded with Concorde, his pride rubbed off on her and her confidence blossomed. She embraced her talents and no longer let anyone push her around.
Spymaster said that when he first heard what had happened to her, his first thought was that he had never returned her hairbrush. He didn't even notice he was crying until one of his little critters came to comfort him. Grieving is a funny thing, and everybody does it differently. It's those little silly moments, like swapping hair products, that he will miss the most.
Mrs Holdsworth expressed regret that she couldn't have known Elizabeth better. The druids don't look too kindly on witches, and Elizabeth had her own reasons to not trust witchcraft. Still, she always had the utmost respect for her.
Nic said he could've been a druid if he wanted, but he was too interested in exploring, and it would've required him to stay put. He sensed that Elizabeth was the same way, and that she missed that she couldn't go wandering. They would regularly have lunch together and she would bake him banana bread in exchange for stories of his adventures.
Captain Brus said he remembers Elizabeth as a firey-haired teenage stowaway who ran away to Jorvik to make a difference. Around thirty years ago he was asked by the keepers of Aideen to dock his boat in a certain place for an hour, and then take off. No cargo to load or unload, just dock for a while and then leave. He knew better than to ask too many questions of the druids, so he did as they asked. Soon he found why he'd been ask to dock there. He found Elizabeth hiding under a tarp in a lifeboat. She was shivering, wet, and half starved. He took her up to his cabin and got her tea and sandwiches and listened as she told him about the wicked home she was escaping, the strange dreams that had been haunting her, and the strange symbol that appeared on her leg. It was the symbol of the sun circle. He's worked with her many times since then, both when she was a soul rider and after horrible tragedy broke apart her sisterhood, and she has always shined bright with the light of that stowaway who fled to Jorvik long ago. She was a girl who gave up her name and became a "Sunbeam".
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Maya said she wishes she got to know Elizabeth better. She was always a little afraid of her. She seemed to look at her like she expected her to mess up at any moment. Alex said that's because Maya snuck into the Stone Circle once, Fripp was so angry.
Aw, poor Maya just wants to be a hero like Alex. Also, it sounds like Alex spends all her time after missions crashing on Maya's couch and eating all her food. That's so cute
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Agnetha explained that all the red wild roses are because they were Elizabeth's favorite flower. She said she wants to plant a whole bunch of them around Jorvik to remember her.
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Elizabeth's horse, Calanthe, will need someone to look after her now. Rhiannon first suggests Avalon, but he protests that he doesn't have enough time to care for a horse right now. Evergray, on the other hand, really needs to stop hitching rides with me. Plus Calanthe seems to like him. I think they'll get along great.
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Concorde is too young to really understand what has happened, but she can feel the loss of someone so strong in the sun circle. The other guardians reassured her that Elizabeth's soul will live on in her memory.
Finally, the memorial is over. The soul riders got together for a meeting.
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Without Elizabeth, we're kind of on our own now. We need to figure out what's next for us. We decide to focus on two things we need before we can fight Dark Core and Garnok.
We need to heal Fripp. We need his guidance.
And we need to figure out what to do about Concorde. Anne can't very well ride into battle on a foal, after all.
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BLACK FRIDAY SPOILERS
The following post contains spoilers for the new musical, Black Friday, by Team Starkid. Continue reading at your own risk. 
MY FAVORITE PARTS FROM THE BLACK FRIDAY DIGITAL TICKET + OTHER COMMENTARY (IN ORDER OF HOW THEY APPEAR) WHILE WATCHING IT FOR THE 4TH OR 5TH TIME [contains very harsh and explicit language]
**These points will be brought up in another post (involving the Hatchetfield Universe theories)
The ENTIRETY of the Wiggly jingle at the beginning
Jaime saying “his belly’s so squishy!” while jumping up and down
The tights
“Uncle Wiley, where does Wiggly come from?”
James Tolbert (Team Starkid choreographer-turned-actor) STOLE the show
Curt Mega’s dancing in that song killed me
“DO THE WIGGLE!”
ROBERT AND JAMES DANCING WAS EVERYTHING
**Paul still doesn’t like musicals? (I have a theory of where this show takes place in the Hatchetfield Universe but that’s for another post)
The way Paul looks at Emma when she’s on her Cabbage Patch Kid rant!
“I’m Paul. I’m Emma’s...boyfriend.”//“Well, we haven’t put a label on it yet.”//“But we are intimate.” (Bonus: Emma’s glare)
Paul is still awkward I love him.
“I do not get flashbacks. I remember bad things vividly.”
“Thank you for your service.”//“I didn’t do it for you.”
“Ski-ball sucks.” (I wholeheartedly disagree but whatever)
Grace Chastity is Tom’s babysitter for Tim confirmed
Okay. Okay. Okay. OKAY. 
TOM JUST WANTS TO MAKE IT UP TO HIS SON BECAUSE HE FEELS GUILTY ABOUT THE CRASH I’M SOFT
DYLAN SAUNDERS STILL STEALING HEARTS
WHY DO YOU GIVE DYLAN ALL OF THE HEART-WRENCHING SONGS????? I DON’T NEED TO CRY AT 4AM
THE LIGHTING 
 “Excuse me, miss. Do you think it’s okay for me to park here?”//“Yeah, it says ‘no parking at any time’ but I’m sure the loading trucks can just park across the street. Does that work for you?”
“If I won’t support my drinking habit, who will?”
“Hark, the herald angels sing. Glory to a newborn king. A fuckin’ furry little monster’s gonna make me a pile of cash.”
“Tell me, Lex. Do you know why they call it Black Friday?”//“Because it comes after Thursday?”
“Well, friend-o. I have a feeling that these little babies are going to take you so far into the black that you ain’t never comin’ back.” *long uncomfortable pause*
“Oh, you’re gonna make a killin’. That’s an Uncle Wiley’s Toys guarantee!”
FRANK HUGGING THE BOX OF WIGGLYS
“Hark, the herald angels sing. Glory to a newborn king. Peace on Earth, and lots of money. MONEYMONEYMONEYMONEY just for ME.”
JON’S VOICE AS WIGGLY I CAN’T
“mALL security we got a shoplifter. Drop that doll!” (His voice crack killed me oh my God)
HIS OUTFIT (The first time I saw him I went “Oh my God he’s emo”)
“Where’s my sister?”// “Oh no.” *stares dramatically* “Hannah?” *even more dramatic* “Is that what you’ve been telling me every day for the past four weeks? To pick up your kid sister?” *grabbing Lex* “Oh, I must’ve forgot because I’m so stupid.” Ethan needs to take up drama
“Do I gotta put a leash on you like a dog, or my cousin Oliver?” 
“Don’t pull her.”//*voice crack* “I’m nOt.”
“Alright banana split.” i’m not crying 
“You see this hat? This was gifted to me by a great warrior.” *Lex laughs*/*Ethan turns around slowly* “Don’t you fuckin’ laugh.”
“I’d make a great dad, I’m just sayin’.” (Ethan isn’t a horrible person he’s just misguided)
“My mom’s a bitch!”
Honestly the way Ethan looks at Lex
*in the middle of singing* “That’s not how cameras work, babe.”
Hannah’s dancing
ROBERT’S WIGGLES DURING “We’re missing in action.”
“Dear mom, it’s been real."
“I’d say you did your best, but I’m not a liar.”//“Oh, L-I-E-R, babe.”//“We get it Ethan, you’re a good speller.”
“PS: Get yourself a new trailer, because this one? Is BROKE AS SHIT!”
Robert in skinny jeans. Can Robert wear skinny jeans more often please?
Hannah doing the “smoking” thing with her hands.
“Hannah! What the fuck is this [imitating it]?That better be fucking FLOSS.”
UGH LAUREN AS LINDA MONROE IS LEGENDARY
“That’s called a bribe, sir, and it’s illegal...or it should be.”
“I have four boys. Four beautiful, blond, boys.”
“Do you really think your children are better than everyone else’s.”// “In so many words, YES.”
“I hope you don’t get a Wiggly. I hope you fucking die.”
“Well, my children were accidents.”
“Stop crying, Gerald. I wasn’t talking to you.”
The way Tom and Becky looked at each other when they met again ugh.
Whatever that song is called when the Hatchetfield citizens were gossiping about it like I think it’s called “What Do You Say?” or something?
“Tom’s put on some weight.”
“I heard Tom is seeing things.”
Jon is serving looks.
The dance they did when they said “all the years that had fun” killed me
Curt Mega is a treasure
“It’s cold out.”//“Nothing really.”//“How are things?”//“Haven’t seen it.”
“Oh my, God, it’s a train-wreck.”//“My favorite.”//“Give me my tub of popcorn.”//“Just skip to the fucking.”//“She’d never--.”//“Either way this is torture porn.”
“I think I’ll step in and save her.”// “You don’t have half of a chance, bitch.”
“THERE, she looked at his crotch.”//“He looked at her boobs.”
“I like dolls. I’m just kidding. I don’t like dolls. At least, not like that.”// “I missed you.” *everyone freaks out*
The dance that looks like a beating heart around them I love.
“Did you know if you spend money, your kids will love you maybe.”
COREY DORRIS NEEDS APPRECIATION BYE
“Give us your fucking money. Give us your fucking cash.”
SERIOUSLY I CAN’T WAIT FOR THIS RECORDING
“Do we have any morality.”
“What’s a grown man going to do with 85 dolls?”// “Well, one will stay in the box for posterity. One will be used exclusively for bath time.”
“If you’re going to make with the hysterics, TAKE IT TO MACY’S.”// “How dare you. Are you hearing this, Gerald? Yes, call my attorney.”
“I’ll tickle one doll, and one doll will tickle me.”
The bidding war.
“Get your hands off her.”// “Fuck YOU.”
The lighting slowly gets red when they start bidding.
“$800.”//“$3.”//“Can I use these coupons?”
“Well, if you’re not going to sell me that doll, I guess I’ll just gonna have to take it.”
“If he gets one, I’m getting four.” *Linda climbs the counter like Draco*
So the lighting during “Feast or Famine” is just???? The green and red??? Like holiday colors but at the same time it’s representative of greed and rage???? 
Just all of “Feast or Famine”
“What’s shaking banana, you okay?” I’M HAVING FEELINGS UGH
“What’s up with that grammar. Even I know it’s ‘more badder’.” Ethan no
ETHAN NO
“Give me that fucking doll I’m in a hurry.” Okay, Jeff you freaking gremlin man
WHO BRINGS A KNIFE SHOPPING?? Unless he stole that, too.
“Do you see him? Do you see him? Do you see him?”//“YES, I fucking see him!”
James as “Obama” I’m crying
“I’ll hold onto the little...uh...whippersnapper.”
“While you three devise a strategy, I’ll hold on to the little friend.”// “Shut the fuck up!”
“You’re nothing more than a Harvard Law School community organizing prick!” I’M SCREAMING
“Take one step closer to my fwendy-wend and I’ll rip your fucking throat out with my own teeth.”
“No, he’s mine! Back off or I will send a laser-guided ballistic missile to your house in Denver. You’ll be scraping off what’s left of your kids off the FUCKING pavement.”
“MORRIS. Give me that COCK-SUCKING MOTHERFUCKING COCK-A-DOODLE-DOLL” CURT MEGA IS A TREASURE 
“I’ll bite your dick off!”
THE AUDIENCE (AND MY) REACTION TO MCNAMARA 
*Obama voice* “Oh, I’m gonna vomit.”
“I hope you don’t mind if I let myself in.”// “Into the oval office?”
“Monsters and Men” IS A BOP
*yeets the Wiggly off stage*
“DECK THE HALLS” IS A BOP
I would 100% watch “Santa Claus is Going to High School” unironically
“Jingle! Jangle! If anyone sees two elves in my locker, I’ll get expelled for sure.”
The dancing UGH
Lauren is the cutest elf ever
PART THREE OF LAUREN AND ROBERT DOING A CUTE DANCE TOGETHER
“What the fuck am I watching?”
Becky talking about her ex-husband breaks my heart. I would die for her.
“You say you killed your family. I hope I killed mine.” My heart is breaking help me
Becky and Tom are freaking CUTE
“Take Me Back” is the cutest song ever
All of the times the characters mention other dimensions and stuff??? Each has a different context, but Joey’s character did say that Hatchetfield was a special town earlier in the show so????
All of the making out I’m done
Becky’s leg
“I knew you weren’t Santa.”//“A red tricycle.”//“SANTA!” *starts making out*
“This is the best movie ever!”
Robert has to make out with two people every day.
**PEIP deals with Paranormal, Extraterrestrial, and Interdimensional stuff, so if TGWDLM was Extraterrestrial, and BF is Interdemensional, will Nerdy Prudes Must Die be Paranormal? Will we see PEIP again? [I’M GOING TO MAKE A SEPARATE POST ABOUT THE THEORIES WITHIN THE UNIVERSE]
**“There are many dimensions, sir.”
“You want to send me into the fucking Twilight Zone to have a sit-down with the devil?”
“They will build him his birth canal.” Ew
Sherman Young is so freaking creepy
“Wiggly is good. Wiggly is just.”
“Bring forth the infidels.”
*as Linda walks onto the stage* “MOTHER MOTHER MOTHER”
“I dislike that word, Gerald. Cult. No, it’s a new, exciting religion that I started.”
“I’ve met God, He had nothing nice to say about you.”
“Adore Me” is a BOP
“You’ll kneel before me. Kiss my toe.”
“I will destroy everything, and then I will destroy everything. I guarantee I’ll destroy everything in my path. Unless I get what I--shit, Gerald.”
The followers repeating “I get what I shit.”
THE TIE AROUND JON’S HEAD KILLS ME
“I want you to know what I mean when I say my evil shit, ‘kay?”
TEAM STARKID PLEASE MAKE LAUREN A VILLAIN MORE OFTEN
“What’s shaking banana?” DON’T DO THIS TO ME
Evil Ethan hurts me
Hannah doesn’t deserve this
“I’m in the Black and White now. It’s just like California. It never ends.”
“I swear on my own grave.” I’M
Hannah calling Wiggly out on his bullshit
“Well, Webby is a stupid bitch.” JON UGH
“I’m going to eat you riiiight the fuuuuck nowwwww.” This scene just makes me want to give Hannah a hug
“We don’t get tricked. We’re grown-ups.” GROWN-UPS ARE THE ONLY ONES BEING TRICKED I CAN’T WITH THIS MUSICAL
“Tom, how could you? You let her get away!”
Dylan jumping at an audience member
I know people think that Ethan’s magic hat thing was bullshit but like the syringe missed Hannah so like?? 
“You think that in the Netherlands they care about some toy? Hah! Nah, they’re too busy enjoying their free vacations and free health care.”
Made In America is A BOP
THE SNIGGLES
BIG WIGGLY
I feel like Made in America won’t have the same punch on the soundtrack.
Joey’s falsetto
R.I.P. General John McNamara
“MERRY CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKER!”
“Uh, oh, Mr. Prezy-wez. It seems you’ve misplaced your bomby-womb. Don’t worry. I’m sure it will turn up somewhere.”
“We’ve lost Moscow, sir.”
“He baited us into World War Three.”//*Wiggly giggles* “That tickles.”
“Is this what I live for? To be choked in a toy store?”
“Black Friday” is such a beautiful song though
“Did I need her more than she needed me?” I’m crying please stop
“I’m authorizing you to use my firearm.”
“Monsters and Men” reprise is PERFECT
“Kids don’t want that piece of shit.”//“What?”//“They’re all into Fortnight, dude!”
“I mean, you’re like 40! You probably think your life is over!”
“Everyone is dying, and that includes me, too.” Jeff is a lyrical genius but he needs to back off of whatever angsty juice he’s drinking.
“If I fail you one more time, the punishment won’t match the crime, cause there’s no pain that could ever explain how I let you down.”
“I failed you once, and I will fail again.” I cried when I watched this the first time
“If I Fail You” is such an emotional song
“Alright, let’s go.”//“Fuck, yeah! Should I move these boxes first?”//“Fuck, yeah.”
Charlotte? Where did you come from???
“The only man that’ll have her now is Jack Daniels.”
“And you, you little shit.” Says Draco, the little shit.
“A magic hat? That’s ridiculous. Only dolls are magic.”
“Is this some kind of a joOoOoOoke?”
“Answer me, or I’ll cut your mouth open with my FUCKING KNIFE.”
“You’re a fucking moron.”// “Then you’ve been out-fucked by a fucking moron.”
Lauren’s wiggles during “He will wigglewigglewigglewigglewiggle his way into life.”
“Wiggle” is such a silly song but the harmonies and choreography????? Iconic.
ROBERT’S TWIRL???
JAMES’ DEATH DROP????
EVERYONE’S SEPARATE WIGGLES????
The crying when Becky shot Linda.
“Gerald? It’s Gary. Yep, we need to talk about the will. Goldstein!”
The red light that symbolized Wiggly being on fire.
The followers deciding to burn with Wiggly.
“I have this cooky, reclusive Biology professor.” *audience loses their shit*
“What am I supposed to do without my iPhone?”//“Wear a watch?”
“What If Tomorrow Comes” is such a haunting song
Kendall’s voice is so GOOD!
HOT CHOCOLATE BOY?
MR. DAVIDSON?
BILL?
The dabbing
Hannah and Lex hugging
Paul hugging Emma and Bill
The Hot Chocolate Boy and the Cinema Kid holding hands honestly adorable and I lowkey ship
A little bit of instrumentals from “Not Your Seed” in the end-credit music?? (From the lyric “Look what happened, nightmare time.”)
That’s it. It’s very long, but those were either my favorite parts or small things I noticed. Mostly just my thoughts.
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jenhrding · 4 years
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dead to me season 2; a review
hello, i need to write about this because i woke up at 4am to watch season two and i have soooo many feelings that i need to vent even if nobody really cares
this is gonna be long so i divided it by episode and i'm doing a summary at the end if you don't feel like reading the entire thing
if you follow me on twitter you may have seen a lot of my comments on the season, as i needed to tweet about it while i watched it, but this is more of an organized type of thing
A LOT OF SPOILERS AHEAD
> i'm a die hard judy/jen shipper so if you liked michelle this might not be for you, i'm sorry
EPISODE 1
okay, the season picks up on the morning after ted's death and that was something i really appreciated. i usually hate when tv shows skip things and only mention what happened, not showing us how it happened
judy and henry's relationship warms my heart. they have a really strong bond and i'm glad we got to see more of them together throughout the episodes.
but, as we can't have everything, it hurt me a lot to see the way jen was treating judy. i love them both equally and because of that i can clearly see their mistakes without being biased, or at least i hope i can. i get that she was hurt with everything that judy did, and i loathed steve deeply, but still, the guy was his ex-fiancee, and she loved him to death even if he was a toxic piece of crap. the way jen said she was just there to pick up stuff and then told her she burned everything without even looking at her made me so sad for judy, and her dropping judy off saying they would never talk again was very cold, but that i would've seen coming from jen.
i was constantly feeling bad for judy because she didn't have time to mourn steve or abe and there she was, broke and without a place to stay. and let's just say, abe was an angel in her life even after he died. props to him for treating her like she deserved to be treated.
the thing with michelle started and it seemed a bit forced to me, like they just wanted to shove judy to someone else so we would stop asking for jen & judy being together.
and then jen called judy and i just KNEW that was happening, that scene really made me happy and it felt like they were taking a step forward in their relationship. jen worries about judy so much, even if she's not the best at showing it.
"like an excuse to see me again." "did it work?"
EPISODE 2
steve's twin thing was 100% so they wouldn't have to kick james out. it was very predictable and unnecessary. i guess it added a bit to the plot but his presence really annoyed me. but, i need to say, james did a nice job because ben didn't have any of steve's traits (i know that's what actors are supposed to do but i felt like he needed a compliment).
diana was irritating me from the beginning, and i'm glad i got to like her more by the end of everything.
i didn't get the deal with nick. i know breakups are hard but he looked depressed af. maybe it had to do with his history, everything with his friend and him losing his job and stuff. but i'm not really interested in that so it didn't bother me.
and may i just add? the scene with judy and the bird, she truly is a princess, i can't with her. also, i liked the subtle hint when jen told ben not to climb on the freezer because it was too low, and we would come to find out later that steve's body was in that freezer.
episode two had a lot of fun moments and it was a lighter one, maybe to prepare us for the chaos that was coming next.
"you look beautiful. i wish you would love yourself more."
EPISODE 3
judy hugging the freezer got me ????? i know she's an espiritual person but was she really acting like steve was feeling anything? i was confused, honesly, but i don't blame her "she will never do anything wrong :)"
the rats scene was funny but i hated how long they took to solve the freezer thing and just showed jen going there and crying sooo many times it kinda got tiring.
jen was being so nice to judy, touching her and hugging her and i had my hopes up for a little bit (only to get played again but i'll talk about that later).
the scene with michelle was cute, kinda necessary for judy to realize things about her grief, but sincerely speaking she just makes me very bored.
the breakdown scene in the garage was GREAT, linda and christina did an amazing job and i want to give them all of the awards.
"just wanted to tell you that i forgive you."
EPISODE 4
this episode had so much potential to be gay lmao, i could actually picture jen trying to comfort judy and end up kissing her and then they would've been together and all, but liz really doesn't want to give us what we want.
the scene at the bar was one of the best scenes in this season. they finally TALKED about their feelings. about how they still cared about both of the men who hurt them even if they were still mad at them for being shitty guys, and that was so important, love really does weird things to us.
and the dancing scene was EVERYTHING!!!! plus, they slept in the same bed even though there were two beds in the room, so...
judy hugging henry because of his bird = my heart cried they really are mother and son
jen telling judy that she could say goodbye and LINDA's SINGING!!!!!!!! a big yes for me
"will you be my person?" "yes, i will be your person."
EPISODE 5
hated this one. jen telling judy she needed space was hurtful, specially because judy was planning a day to make her feel better.
i just really hated this one. jen and ben is a NO, and judy with michelle was bothering me.
the highlight of it, for me, was when jen called judy to help her with charlie because, well, he is his mom too.
plus: the car burning scene was hot.
EPISODE 6
judy and jen talking to charlie like his moms was sooo nice i liked that scene a lot.
the voicemails steve left judy were disgusting. i hate that guy so much and i'm glad he's dead (sorry) and not able to hurt her anymore. we only want happy and safe judy here.
jen was jealous when judy mentioned her "new friend" you can't change my mind on this one.
i actually thought judy and michelle were gonna kiss in the car, but i appreciated that liz dragged it a little bit more.
i loved most of the arcade scenes, specially the ones with their family. i liked how they portrayed jen's relationship with the boys getting good again but didn't drag it on for too long, i think it was quite nice the way they did it.
and no, i'm not here for judy and michelle even though linda looks very hot while kissing another woman.
EPISODE 7
um, judy and michelle slept together and i was not happy. in fact, i made a lot of tweets complaining about it and twitter actually put me on limit for a few minutes. her saying "i love you" felt so forced and fake, i don't know, maybe it's cause i just don't like them together.
i was really appreciating scenes with jen and charlie, even if i don't like him very much. it felt good to see their relationship developing and getting better again because i do love a mother-son plot.
"of all the lesbians in lagoona" (jen included if i may add). this scene really showed a trust between them that i missed, jen telling judy she couldn't see michelle anymore and even though judy was upset she agreed with it because she knows jen only wants what's best for her.
it really hurt me to see that girl pregnant, because i know how much judy wanted a baby and for her to have five miscarriages and have to see that other woman pregnant with steve's baby must've hit her hard.
hated jen and ben together. honestly, it felt so weird to have jen kiss the guy who looks so much like the guy she killed, so, i did not like that.
judy's speech to diana was really important. it really showed more of who she is, really, a person who just tries all the time to do everything right and keeps fucking it up (like myself, i'd say), and i liked that scene a lot, specially when she goes to pick up the plastic bags hahaha.
EPISODE 8
this one showed a bit of why we should've been prepared for episode nine.
jen and judy's first scene was really good. they started it fighting but the ending was so lovely and just showed us how much they love each other and the things they'd give up for the other one to be happy.
i really hated how michelle treated judy on this episode. judy didn't have to tell her anything right away, they were together for five seconds. (or maybe i'm overreacting because i love judy way too much and hate seeing her being mistreated).
the end of this episode showed a lot of phone calls that made me confused and it had a few cliffhangers that i found to be a bit unnecessary. the show is interesting enough and i think liz overdid the cliffhangers a bit in this season, but it wasn't something that deeply bothered me.
EPISODE 9
i have a lot to say about this one so just take a deep breath before i vent lmao.
jen and ben fucked. which i thought was unnecessary and out of character for her. i really didn't see jen sleeping with a guy who has the same face as the guy she killed, and the scene where she looks at ben and remembers steve's dead body was so weird.
plus, i wish they would've gotten deeper into jen's mastectomy story. the only mention to it in this season was when she was in the bathroom, and she couldn't even bring herself to look in the mirror. it was unlike her to sleep with some stranger after that, since she's so ashamed of it, and it made me sad that the first person to see her naked after surgery (besides ted) wasn't judy, who she actually trusts. i didn't need jen to talk about it, because i know her character doesn't like to talk feelings, but the scene where she was alone could've been longer and showed a bit more of her story.
they showed so much of judy's background in the last two episodes and i loved it! i like how they were slowly revealing why her character acts the way she does. we knew she didn't like to be alone, but now we know that it's because she was alone most of her life, and because of that she clings to anyone who shows a bit of interest in her. therefore, why she didn't like nick that much and still tried to make things work out with him, and when steve showed her a little bit more of compassion, she went back to him. and now it's michelle, who she started seeing right after jen told her she needed space. judy is codependent, and i liked to understand her relationship with her mother so i could understand her relationship with others.
jen's scene at city hall was so important and powerful. first, i was afraid she might embarrass herself but she was incredible. the way she called andrew out not even scared if all the white men sitting there wouldn't believe a woman's harassment story, the way she talked about ted and ugh everything was great.
then, things started to go downhill. jen's relationship with the boys started declining again and it broke my heart (but i liked how henry asked for judy because he was sad and wanted to see her). and this anticipated what i elected (as if i have any room to say anything) to be the best scene of the show.
the garage scene. i have so many feelings towards it but at the same time i don't know how to express them.
first, judy said she was going to take the blame for charlie and that right there is what a mom would do (and finally they talked about judy's s*icide attempt). besides that, judy said that jen had a family and she couldn't lose that family, and then we realize how much it hurt her when her mom said she didn't have a family of her own (even though, in season one, jen said she was a part of their family).
linda and christina were brilliant in this bit. linda's expressions send me every time, and personally, i love it when she curses because it shows a side of her character that only comes out when she's really nervous and stressed, since she's always trying to see the good in everything. the way she raised her voice and said a lot of "fucks" really brought a different tone to the scene that we hadn't seen during the season.
jen had a lot of breakdowns during this season. but none of those were as exceptional as this one. ted fucked up her mind badly, and steve saying all those things triggered her to do what she did. imagine being married to a person for eighteen years and finding out, after his death, that he was cheating on you for a year and a half, that really must mess up with your self esteem and how you see yourself. jen is constantly thinking that everyone that she loves hates her and she ends up hating herself (as judy said "i wish you would love yourself more."). she is an extraordinary character and there's so much i still need to know about her.
now, here's something that bothered me. this scene was great, but i think jen was a bit out of character when she said "that's because you love anyone who just gives you a morsel of fucking attention, even if it's abusive. it's like you get off on it or something". honestly, the jen i know and have grown to love would never blame a woman for being abused, even if she was out of her mind for being upset. she saw how judy was mistreated by steve and she always knew he was toxic, but she would never say that to judy, as if she had any guilt on it.
this scene was so raw and chaotic but it was breathtaking, in a good way. judy's "i'm not like you" and their fight in front of the house, also judy's screams, everything was on point.
and then, jen got to see something we've been noticing for the past season and this one as well. when judy's stressed or hurt, she starts self-harming. it was never brought up before but it's something to watch out for. how many times did she curse at herself and hit herself in front of mirrors? and in the car she starts hitting herself really strongly when she's asking jen to stop. now, i don't know which part of her history this has to do with but i'd really like for them to get more into this, as it seems like a great storyline.
jen watching judy sleep and putting her hair behind her ear was so gay pure and i loved this scene so much.
EPISODE 10
what jen did for her family was beautiful, even if it didn't start that well. now, about her letter to judy, i sobbed so much reading that one.
this episode said a lot about diana's humanity. her and jen's talk about their mothers showed another side of her that i really liked. and i'm a sucker for motherhood storylines, so i cried a lot during that scene.
i liked this episode a lot too. loved to see charlie so worried about his mother for once in his life, and how well judy handles things as a mother.
now this is where i get mad. the scene where jen and judy are talking outside was the perfect setting for them to confess feelings. michelle felt like something that judy needed to replace steve, so it wouldn't last anyway (me hoping that she's not showing up on season 3), and because she had that experience, now she could love jen in a healthier way, in a way that maybe she couldn't before. there were so many 'i love you's and so many hugs and touches and no kiss and i was sad.
i loved the way jen said that judy needed to learn how to say no (and also, can she please stop saying sorry all the time? she's always making herself sad to make others happy-- i can't stop seeing myself in her). and it was genius how they used this thing to make her say no to her mom, who only wanted to see her to get out of prison, it showed her strenght.
the way they picked up jen's grief for her mom was really nice, i'd also like to learn more about that in the future. we could really understand where her anger comes from and why she despises herself so much.
and, baby, let me tell you, judy hale is a GENIUS. the money inside the paintings? i never saw that coming and i was so happy watching that scene! specially when she showed jen and they held hands. :(
charlie found the letters and he's finally getting to know what actually happened to his father (i'm guessing), and i wanna see his reaction. and i'm so here for their vacation! "talk to me like lovers do!" she really just keeps playing with my heart. (and jen calling judy "judes" was really cute.)
the last scene was something. them talking about the sign and then ben hitting them because he was drunk? i wasn't expecting that. and, as i said before, liz likes a good cliffhanger, but this one didn't seem that harsh. if she wanted to, she could've just left us in the dark about whether jen was alive or not, but she didn't, and i appreciated that.
i still don't know if this leaves room for another big storyline, maybe this should be something to be solved in the first two episodes of season three so they could jump into something more exciting, i don't know.
"i love you more than wine. thank you for loving me and our boys."
OVERALL THOUGHTS
i liked this season a lot. it felt a lot different from season one, the settings, the air. it was a bit more chaotic, i must say, and i do think they could've maybe chilled for a little bit and left the high point of stress being only on episodes 9 and 10. literally, everything was happening, all the time, and the only time they had to breathe was when they went dancing that night.
there was a shift in my feelings, for sure. last season i picked up on a lot of judy's mistakes and things she did that bothered me. this season, i did that more with jen, but i still love them so much istg i'd die for them (not to sound dramatic or anything lmao). it's just that last season i identified a lot more with jen's anger and behaviors, and in this one a saw a lot of myself in judy, and that might've prevented me from criticizing them as much in their respective moments.
i love this show to death, and i'm just waiting for award nominations that i'm sure will come. let's just hope that, this year, they also acknowledge linda's brilliant acting and even give both of them some awards.
this is me, (im)patiently waiting for a season 3 confirmation and i'm sure i'm just gonna rewatch everything for the next year like i did with season one.
i needed to talk about this season, and twitter doesn't give me enough space to do that, but this is not something i usually do. if you read all of this, you're brave, and i'm thankful for your attention.
now, can liz please make judy and jen girlfriends?
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fialleril · 5 years
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I absolutely adore Flash and Substance pretty much for the exact reasons you list and that gifset you posted of Flash and Trickster might be my favorite scene from the entire DC Animated Universe
Literally my only gripe about Flash and Substance is that they made Linda a Flash fangirl when really Wally should have been a Linda fangirl. But I can overlook this because she’s there and they’re still super cute together. (Though I also have…a lot of headcanons by which I finagle things so that she more resembles her comics counterpart while still fitting in with her character in the show. I won’t derail with those headcanons here though.) And because pretty much everything else about that episode is just perfect.
Anyway, for anybody just joining in, my tags on that gifset were:
this is the purest interaction in all of superhero media i will never understand people who think kind and decent characters are boring catch me out here watching flash and substance on infinite loop chin in hands and stars in my eyes an entire episode about the power of kindness and good people being good to each other yes please this is the content i signed up for
I kid you not, I have never once managed to watch Flash and Substance without having to pause at the end of that scene and just…bask in the goodness for a couple minutes. I mean, the chin hands and starry eyes is completely literal. There’s hand flapping involved usually. And sometimes noises audible only to dogs.
I just really love stories about good people who care in such a genuine way that they make everyone around them a little better, too. Idk if there’s an official name for that character type, but it’s definitely in my top five fictional tropes. And I particularly love the execution of it in JLU generally and Flash and Substance specifically because it’s just so… low key.
I mean, the three other scenes that instantly come to mind when I think of this trope, three scenes that also make me pause and just soak them up every time, are the “help me take this mask off” scene in Return of the Jedi, and two scenes from Mad Max: Fury Road - Capable meeting Nux in the back of the war rig, and Max telling Furiosa his name at the end.
And those are all stunningly beautiful scenes that destroy me every time, no matter how many times I watch them. But they’re also Big Deal Moments. (And they should be!)
What’s so amazing about Flash and Substance is that…there really isn’t a Big Deal Moment at any point in the episode. It’s not a Big Deal Episode, either. Hell, it’s really a filler episode. Just a slice of life in Central City. There’s nothing particularly special about it and that’s kinda the point. Wally’s just…like that. All the time. He’s just a really decent guy, who knows everyone in his city by name, who hangs out with kids at the orphanage and paints old ladies’ fences in his free time, who visits his villains in the hospital, not even to check up on their rehabilitation, but just to hang out.
And this episode takes place less than half a season after the end of the Cadmus arc. The entire Justice League is still on thin ice with the public in general and with the US and world council governments in particular. They’re constantly on their best behavior trying to prove that they deserve to be called heroes at all.
And meanwhile Central City has built a Flash Museum because they love their hometown hero. Because, much as I love Bats and Supes and all the rest, Flash isn’t some half-mythical figure fading in and out of the shadows, or some symbol of hope spotted up in the sky, or somebody who comes in to save the day and then is off to the next town and the next day that needs to be saved. He wears a mask and (unlike his comics counterpart, at least during the period I’m fondest of) he has a secret identity, but he doesn’t actually act much differently as Flash than he does as Wally.
Well, okay. He’s actually got a pretty damn impressive Obfuscating Stupidity act going on, but one of the low key but delightful reveals that comes out of Flash and Substance is that he primarily employs his Obfuscating Stupidity act on the other members of the Justice League. And supervillains, of course. (The non-Rogue ones, anyway. The Rogues damn well know better.) And even then, he doesn’t keep up the act out of any desire to disguise his identity. He does it because somebody’s got to be the fun one in this band of Super Serious Heroes, and it just so happens that Wally likes being the fun one. So that works out nicely for everyone. Well, everyone but Grodd and Lex Luthor, who are perpetually annoyed by his heckling. But honestly they deserve it.
And it gives him an advantage sometimes, being the fun one. Like with Trickster. Wally’s actually friends with James, and the really wonderful thing about that scene with Trickster is that James knows they’re friends, too. It’s not the far more common superhero scenario, where the hero cares a lot about the villain’s hopeful rehabilitation because they feel somehow responsible, but the villain despises the hero and the audience knows that rehabilitation will never happen. Wally genuinely cares about James and James knows it, and knows that he can trust that, which is kind of amazing, on both of their parts. And I suspect that’s partly because Wally is the fun one, so he and James understand each other in a way heroes and villains often don’t.
Because being a superhero is Serious Business. Except when it’s really not. Because your supervillain is a guy just trying to live out the trickster archetype, and there’s a script for that, so hey, you might as well play along. It means people don’t get hurt, and it’s also just more fun that way. And when things do get serious, when your supposed nemesis is off his meds and needs a friend to remind him why he does need them, then you can actually be that friend without a lot of drama getting in the way.
Or, in other words: Nobody gets hurt, and that’s a really good day.
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mr-stjames-icon · 4 years
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Weekly Task: Self Para
“He tries.”
Jesse followed her gaze to see the figure walking around their bedroom. They’d been back in their New York apartment for a few days now. The national holiday had been a pleasant distraction from the worry of work and family life but now they were back to this stage. The man drew in a long breath as he watched the figure pace back and forth, chattering on about something to do with his game.
“He does,” Jesse replied. “I mean he really tries but he won’t ever understand.”
He felt his heart sink a little as he knew she was right. Like a kid blindly trying over and over at a test he didn’t know the answers to, Cooper had always done his best to help. He had a kind heart, Jesse had realised this early on.
“But you do.”
The Broadway star looked across at her from where he was sat. Elbows resting on his knees and hands held together over the empty space. He wasn’t fond of these sorts of conversations. “I do?” he asked, playing dumb to avoid it.
“You. Well, you went through the same, right?”
His eyes flicked away from the teenager. It wasn’t a topic he liked discussing. Nobody knew about this moment in his past. He tried to hide it where possible. Jesse didn’t need to be defined by his past, his weaknesses. He was more than that. It was maybe why he always strived to be the best. To prove that despite the rough start in life, he had as much in him as anyone else.
Jesse St. James was not going to be another lost cause spat out of the system.
“Not to your extent,” he finally muttered.
The teenager drew in a breath as she crossed the space to sit on the couch beside him. He could tell she wanted to talk, wanted to find some sense of comfort. It’s not like in every placement you were gifted with a foster parent who could relate to what it was like being in the system. He had to make an effort.
“I..” Jesse began before his throat closed up. Like tiny hands were clawing at his vocal chords, blocking his windpipe to prevent any of the secrets being spilled. 
He shook his head to shake those feelings. Get it together, St. James.
“I was a kid when I was adopted, I was lucky those years didn’t hinder much of my childhood. People never asked, people just accepted or even better, they didn’t know,” he admitted. “I wasn’t, it’s not that I was ashamed to be adopted or that I was ungrateful to my new family. I owe the St. James family. It’s that-”
“It’s just that poeple look at you differently,” Ramona interrupted. The small nod from him relieved her slightly as she brushed a strand of hair from her face.
“I don’t want people knowing. I just want to feel part of something. Like I belong?” Ramona sighed softly. She was appreciative of how these two had taken her in, how they had accepted her as their own from the start. She often wondered what the future held, she pondered on whether this would be forever but she also feared getting her hopes up. Hope was a dangerous game.
“You get to hide it,” she commented and it made a shiver run up his spine. He knew she didn’t have that luxury, not at the minute anyway.
“I just didn’t speak about it. Nobody asked. I didn’t tell my friends in school, I didn’t tell my ex-wife. It’s nobody’s business but my own.”
“He knows?” Ramona looked back to the laughing figure with a headset on and a cord attached to his PC. She was still thankful that Rachel had helped with designing the apartment. It had been a tough few weeks and she knew he wouldn’t have coped by himself. It was a mismatch family but she liked it. Cooper thrived on having his own space, his sanctuary. She was glad he had it.
“I told him a few days before we went to meet you,” Jesse explained. Clearing his throat, he could feel the tightness in his chest and the feeling of uncertainty while they stepped lightly over this subject. “I had a-” Jesse stopped and cleared his throat, fidgeting with his hands as he stared down at them. Good a distraction. How he deseperately wanted to walk away from this conversation.
“I had a bit of a meltdown- it’s funny, that’s when you caught us coming out of the bathroom,” he smiled slightly at the thought. “He has them all the time but my god it was debiliating. I don’t know how-” he let his thoughts finish that sentence. He never judged Cooper for when he’d spiral out of control but that had shown him a glimpse into what his partner suffered through daily.
Ramona shifted slightly as she could feel the conversation was uncomfortable. “But... you had a kid already, why did you freak?”
Jesse blew out his cheeks and clenched his hands together. His mind drifted back to the argument he and Cooper had, on the Santa Monica Pier when they arrived. The words had resonated with him since. “I’ll tell you, what I told him.”
“I love Moriah and I wouldn’t trade her for the world but I can’t help but regret not waiting to have a child with the person I want to settle down with and waiting until I was secure enough to be a stay at home dad.”
The quiet response made him nervous. He shifted his stance and straightened his back. Posture. It was the best way to prevent being seeing as vulnerable. It projected a confident stance and confident was definitely a feeling that had escaped him. He cursed how family pushed him into these waters.
“Am I a regret?” Ramona asked, the need for confirmation in her voice.
“You seriously believe I’m going to regret the Hellraiser that set fire to her last placement’s garden?” he met eyes with her and caught the blush that spread over her cheeks. “No. Trust me kid, if it wasn’t working, well, you wouldn’t be here any more,” he admitted. It sounded cruel but it was the honest truth.
“That was almost a nice sentiment,” she teased in return. “Still, why did you freak when you came to the centre? Is it because..” she trailed off. The pain in her chest wouldn’t allow her to finish that sentence. She cupped her hands as the little boston terrier wandered in. A small grumble escaping the dog as she yawned, clearly Cooper’s shouting had woken her up from her slumber.
Jesse quickly denied the suspicion with a shake of his head. “No that’s not why I had a-” he struggled on that word again. “I was-” the man sighed heavily and dragged his hand over his face. This was truly uncomfortable in every way.
“I was scared. I wondered whether I wasn’t what these kids need? What if they just want their real parents and I can’t be enough for them? Just because I saw the other side, didn’t make it any easier, it made it worse,” he confessed.
Ramona looked down at Penny, he hands ruffling through the pup’s ears. Her thoughts drifted to her old home, her old dog, Spotty. Her old bedroom. Then thoughts of his father crept in. Linda crept in. She reminded herself why home wasn’t a place to be. Why it wasn’t really a place to call home. 
“You’re doing a good job... I don’t know if that helps?” she spoke a little awkwardly. A shrug accompanied her words but she meant them.
Jesse nodded in response. It was simple but comforting to hear. 
Before he could dwell, he heard the infectious laughter of his fiancé in their bedroom. He hated how much time he spent on that game sometimes but he wouldn’t deny a small smile tugged in the corner of his mouth at the joy it gave.
“Can you get something from the store for me?” he asked, his tone a little different from the senimental one he’d previously shown towards her.
“Sure,” she lent up from her hunched over position. 
“Get some snacks for movie night,” he took his wallet out, pulled a few notes together and held them out. “Take Penny with you, Larry knows her. Just keep her on the leash and she’s fine in the store,” Jesse instructed.
Once the teenager left, he made his way down the short corridor to their bedroom. Seeing Cooper stood behind his desk, headphones on and that stupid grin on his face, he felt himself soften slightly. He was his idiot.
A look of alarm crossed his face when Jesse entered the room. “Was I-” he began to apologise for being too loud. He knew the noise-cancelling headphones had been a problem sometimes so he jumped to apologies.
Jesse frowned a little with a look of disapproval. He straightened his stance and eyed Cooper up. “I’m at the end of my tether, Cooper,” he said coldly.
Cooper’s face fell immediately at the words. What did this mean? They’d been up and down, back and forth, Cooper couldn’t keep track any more. He slipped the headset completely from his head and let it drop onto the computer chair. Fear and anxiety radiated off him as he stayed frozen like a scorned child.
“I don’t know how long I can sit out there with you giggling like a hyena without me,” he said sternly and accompanied the final words with a smile.
The musician’s face twisted quickly as he tried to understand what was happening. Slapping his arm and grumbling in frustration, he took a few steps away from him. “I hate you,” he huffed to himself, a glare fixed on Jesse.
“You’re cute when you pout,” Jesse taunted, knowing it would provoke him further. The slap on his arm hadn’t phased him as he took a step closer and pulled Cooper into his space. “A smile looks better on you, Doofus.”
Almost on cue, a smile crossed Cooper’s face with a defeated sigh. There relationship was one full of taunt and teasing. He expected it most of the time. It was their way of showing affection without getting to personal. Both of them seemed to have a phobia of emotion and letting people in too far.
“Better, could still work on it,” Jesse critqued, eyeing up the smile and got a playful push in return. Grabbing a handful of Cooper’s shirt instinctively to prevent himself from falling, Jesse returned them to that close space. One you very rarely let anyone inside. It was sacred and special for a few people.
“I hate you,” Cooper murmured as he lent in and kissed his cheek.
“I love you,” Jesse corrected with an egotistical smile. His harsh stance softened at the tenderness and the snark blipped away for a few seconds, like a computer program ran into an error and was buffering, allowing his true self through.
Cooper paused for a moment as he rested his arms around his waist. It wasn’t a phrase he often used. The actor didn’t let that word slip out of his mouth too casually, at least not with the meaning it was supposed to carry. He ofter resorted to a loving ‘I hate you’ instead. It signified what he meant without having to say it. Yet, there were moments like this that Cooper wasn’t sure if Jesse needed to hear it. If it was a silent ask to hear those words out loud.
“I love you,” Cooper said softly, his grip pulling Jesse back and forth sligthly in a sway, he was a constant fidget and neither of them liked being this exposed. Leaning in he pecked his lips before holding him. The rough stubble against his own cheek as he rested his chin on the other man’s shoulder.
The touch was tender and welcoming. A warmth filled his chest and Jesse shut his eyes slightly, giving himself completely to the moment of embrace. This was home, this was what he’d been missing during those weeks in Los Angeles, alone. He felt like he belonged somewhere in his life. Next to this man.
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“I told Ramona we’d have a movie night,” Jesse muttered, not moving from the embrace as he breathed in the scent of familiar aftershave. “But I don’t think we’ve graced her with one of our kareoke nights,” he added, feeling the rising cheekbones and the small chuckle from his partner, he knew they were on mutual agreement. That was it, their evening plans were settled.
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ginnyzero · 4 years
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Completely Harmless Ch. 10
Completely Harmless An SSO SilverGlade Re-imagining Story (Or Fix it Fan Salt fic) By Ginny O.
When Lily and her friends wanted to buy horses and were directed to the Silverglade Manor and its myriad of problems, they didn’t expect to start a revolution. They were just a bunch a stable girls. Completely harmless. Right?
A/N: Things are only canon if I say they’re canon. Pre-Saving the Moorland Stables compliant for the most part. Posted in its entirety on my website. Posted in 2000 to 4000 word bits here. Rated T for Swearing Word Count 177,577
Chapter Ten An Official Meeting
The next morning, the girls checked their saddle girths and tugged on hats. They checked each other’s hair to make sure it was in a nice neat low bun. Lily placed the potted Sterling Silver lavender tea rose bush in her saddlebag.
“Ready?” She asked the others.
“Absolutely not,” Regina breathed.
“What if she doesn’t like us?” Stacy looked pale.
They’d kept their make-up quite neutral, a light pink lip, light blush.
“Then, then, we’ll find someplace else,” Abigail said. “We can’t stay here,” she hissed.
They mounted up and two by two (Tyra, Pauline, and Linn had promised to meet them at the bridge) they rode out of the Moorland stables dressed in the purple of Silverglade Equestrian Center.
Loretta and Tan sputtered.
Justin trotted to catch up with Lily and Regina at the front. “You look lovely today, ladies.”
Lily raised a brow at him. “Thank you, young Mr. Moorland.”
Elsa snorted.
“May I inquire into the occasion?”
“We’re about to meet the Baroness,” Melody breathed. “Don’t make us more nervous.”
Justin narrowed his eyes. “Have you been keeping secrets?”
“We’re allowed to form a club. There’s a registry at Moorland Camp and everything,” Regina defended. “But we’ve decided on our own stable.”
“Away from Loretta,” Abigail shuddered.
Lily huffed. “This is really none of your business.”
“You’re leaving us,” Justin put a hand over his heart.
“Oh puhlease,” Elsa rolled her eyes.
“There are plenty of girls back at the Camp to flirt with,” Brittany said.
“And Loretta,” Abigail added.
“But I’m rather fond of you,” Justin said. “I can be most distressed.”
“And we haven’t officially moved yet.”
“Yet!” Justin waved a hand.
Lily sighed. “We can’t move without your father’s permission. We’re just meeting the Baroness today and seeing if she’ll give us permission to base our club out of the Equestrian Center. That’s all.”
“So you dress up in her favorite outfit and riding gear and,” Justin trailed off.
The girls defended themselves.
“We’re trying to make a good impression.”
“Show her we’ll follow her rules.”
“That we care.”
Justin held up his hands. “All right, all right. I apologize for giving you a hard time.”
Lily looked down her nose at him.
Justin looked ahead. He was silent a few minutes. “You really want to leave.”
“It’s not personal. We want our own club and our own space.”
“She’s not a bad person,” Justin said speaking of Loretta.
“And we aren’t her lap kitties,” Regina said tartly.
Justin cringed. “As long as it’s nothing I’ve done.”
He got a reassuring chorus of nos, and ‘we like you.’
Justin pulled off to the side before they left Nilmer’s to go into Silverglade proper. “Then, best of luck.”
“Thank you!”
“And this is all your fault.”
“You sent us to buy horses!”
Justin sighed deeply. “Fine, blame me then! I brought this upon myself.”
“You did!” Lily called over her shoulder, mock spitefully. They continued on their way.
“Poor Justin,” Elsa said in a monotone.
They burst into giggles.
“He really is such a flirt.”
“No wonder Loretta probably has the wrong idea.”
“And Alex.”
“And every other girl he comes into contact with.”
They giggled more.
“He is cute,” Stacy said.
Theresa huffed. “There has got to be other cute guys around Jorvik closer to our age.”
They continued to giggle. Tyra, Pauline, and Linn met them at the bridge. They slowed to a stop.
Regina cleared her throat. “Pauline, you should ride next to Lily. You’re our Vice President.”
Pauline’s eyes widened. “I am!”
“You are!” The other girls confirmed.
“But, but, I thought I was the race master.”
“You are,” they chorused.
“But Vice President too.”
“You know everyone,” Lily said. “And that’s what we need in our VP.”
Pauline flushed.
Everyone moved around.
“All by myself,” Melody sang in the back. “Don’t want to be all by myself.”
“Melody!” They groaned.
But there was giggling too.
They rode off again at a trot. Their entrance wasn’t perfect. They hadn’t practiced it. But they managed. They rode up to the front door. Lily and Pauline stopped in front of the waiting Baroness standing next to Linda. Behind them, the rest of the girls formed two lines.
They all dismounted and took off their hats, tucking them under their arms.
Lily managed a credible curtsey. “Baroness Silverglade, I am Lily of the Silver Drakes Riding Club. We specialize in eventing. We humbly request to make the Silver Glade Equestrian Center our home and make it beautiful again. I believe you may be acquainted with our Vice President and Race Master, Pauline.”
The Baroness’ eyes wandered over them taking in the outfits, the matching equestrian gear and their tasteful and elegant appearances.
“You may also know Tyra,” Lily said.
Tyra curtseyed. “Baroness,” she murmured.
“Our showjumping mistress, Linn.”
Linn flushed and managed a curtsey.
“Regina,” Lily said.
Regina stepped forward.
One by one, Lily introduced the girls and they stepped up and curtseyed. Once finished, Lily stepped back and picked the roses out of her saddlebag. “Baroness Silverglade, we bought this for you as a token of our appreciation for your fine facilities and beautiful horses.” She set the rose at the Baroness’ feet. “It’s a Sterling Silver Hybrid Tea rose.”
The Baroness impulsively reached out and touched the pale lavender petals. Her eyes turned misty. She cleared her throat and folded her hands together. “Girls, I am touched and, and pleased at your hard work. If you keep at this level, I’m sure you will do the Silverglade Equestrian Center proud.”
The girls struggled not to squeal. They vibrated in excitement.
Lily took out her folded paper. “If you’ll sign our paper, Baroness, your stables will have a dedicated riding club to look after your interests once again.” She held it out to the Baroness.
The Baroness took it with trembling fingers. She read it over and nodded.
Linda helpfully passed her the clipboard and pen.
The Baroness signed the bottom with a flourish and passed it back to Lily.
Lily flushed and took it. “Thank you,” she breathed. They had an official club.
The Baroness surveyed them with the air of a queen. Her heart, it was too full for words. She’d never thought she’d see the day when a group of young ladies, strangers to her and mostly to Jorvik, would eagerly volunteer to be the riding club for Silverglade Equestrian Center again. She cleared her throat. “Now, I believe you were building me a duck coop.”
Brittany glanced about and groaned. “They’re everywhere again, aren’t they?”
The Baroness repressed a smile.
The girls mounted up and headed towards the stables. A few minutes later, they came out dressed in gear appropriate for hard work. Half of them started on doing the stable chores like mucking out, feeding the horses, cleaning the parade ground, hauling hay, and getting the hay dryer started. The rest went in search of the wayward ducks.
Godfrey picked up the rose bush.
“The verandah,” the Baroness said gently.
“Of course, my lady,” Godfrey said with a smile. ‘Well done, girls, well done,’ he thought and the two retreated into the manor.
--
Agnetha contacted Lily through her phone. Lily had no idea how Agnetha had gotten her number. Apparently, Agnetha had ordered a composter and it was in pieces at Fort Pinta. She knew that Lily and her friends were going to get the Duck Coop, could they also pick up the composter. The Security Guard would be expecting them.
“At least it’s not James,” Tyra muttered. “He’d make you pay out the nose for holding it for a few hours and you’d have to check the inventory three times to make sure he didn’t take anything.”
Lily widened her eyes. “This is for the Baroness.”
“I’m not sure James would care,” Tyra leaned on her shovel.
“Then we better all go.”
“Sabine’s fired Linn for being disloyal,” Tyra said.
Lily snorted and rolled her eyes. “Sabine can rot. What a witch.”
“Not all witches are bad,” Tyra mumbled.
They mounted up and rode to Fort Pinta getting there around midmorning. The security guard was standing near their things. They thanked him profusely. He muttered about needing help.
They bit their tongues loaded up the crates onto the backs of the horses and rode back to Silverglade. Some adults needed to figure out the solutions to their own problems!
Both the composter and the new duck coop were kits. Kits with explicit directions and tools included. They split into two. One group went to search out Agnetha to find out where she wanted the composter and the other group convened behind the little temple building to clean up the area and start setting up.
The duck coop looked like a miniature version of the temple. It had a wide door so the ducks could get in and out. And coming out of the coop was an ironwork tunnel that led to a long black ironwork cage that ran alongside the temple. It had a triangular roof like the temple had too. This way, the ducks had someplace outside to go at night if they wanted to see the water. On the other side of the temple, they acquired old barrels from Linda that they filled with straw so the ducks had someplace to rest outside during the day.
They painted the temple coop white giggling how it even had a carved frieze of grapes and ducks in togas. The roof was the same red terracotta slate as the manor. They put out shallow Grecian inspired concrete bowls of food and water. The water bowl was deep enough that the ducks could get their heads all the way submerged. The ducks were investigating even before the paint dried poking their heads in the open coop door.
The girls high fived each other and took the hammer and things to the tack room to put with the rest of the tools. One never knew when one would need a hammer!
Agnetha directed them to put the debris into burlap bags she provided and start taking it down behind the manor to the new composter. Then, it was time to shovel out the reflecting pool. Agnetha wanted everything cleaned up before she started planting anything.
Plus, the pipes needed to be fixed. They couldn’t fix the pipes if the reflecting pool had dirt in it!
Agnetha didn’t stand around and watch either. She and Bjorn were right there in the pool with the girls handling shovels and filling bags to heave out of the pool to take to the composter.
Even with so many of them, the pool was large enough it took most the rest of the day. They broke for lunch and dinner of course. The new composter was getting a work out! Agnetha had bought the type that would make gas and thus, she and Bjorn would have gas to cook and heat their house with.
It was rather ingenious.
As they worked, the girls noticed that some of the ducks had taken to following them around. They tried to shoo them back to the coop that evening but the desolate quacks were heart wrenching.
Brittany picked one up. “You don’t think they were looking for us?” She stroked the duck’s head.
“But, but, they aren’t really pets.” Lily bit her lip.
“Maybe they are now!”
Regina sighed. “We can’t take them back to Moorland. We have no place to keep them!”
They put the ducks into the coop and shut the door.
“We’ll be back in the morning. Promise!” Brittany said into one of the windows.
The ducks waddled out into the tunnel and the cage trying to follow them.
“Okay, maybe they are pets.”
“That’s cool though. We are the Silver Drakes,” Grace said.
“Maybe we can give them little bows and hats,” Jennifer giggled.
“Oh good grief. Anastasia will give them entire outfits if we let her,” Lily said and pinched her nose.
“I’m exhausted.” Elsa said. “Let’s worry about if they want to be our pets in the morning. They’re safe.”
“Right.”
They rode slowly back to Moorland mumbling about sore arms and legs.
“This will get better, right?” Stacy rubbed her arms and legs.
“Supposedly,” Jennifer grumbled.
Thomas met them at the door. “Back again so late, girls.”
Lily winced. “Sorry, Mr. Moorland. Agnetha had us shoveling out the fountain.”
“Shoveling out the… fountain,” Thomas said. He shook his head. “And Agnetha is?”
“The Baroness’ new gardener. She’s a tough taskmaster,” Abigail explained.
“I hurt,” Grace groaned.
“We all hurt,” Melody muttered.
Thomas rubbed his neck. “I see.” He considered them. “I don’t like the idea of you riding back and forth every day, especially if you’re going to be spending a lot of time helping her.” He held up a hand. “You’re doing a good thing and I’m not about to stop you. But I’ve got to think about your health and the health of the horses. Let me call up the Baroness tomorrow and see if she’ll house you.”
“Oh,” Lily slumped in relief. “You’d do that. Thank you, Mr. Moorland.”
“Well, if you aren’t going to be at camp. You should be somewhere where someone can keep an eye on you. Jorvik is mostly safe. Don’t get alarmed. I just want to be sure you’re okay and not riding around in the dark or your horses getting spooked and the one hundred and one other accidents that can happen around horses.” Thomas reassured them.
“But the camp fee,” Jennifer said.
“I’m sure you’re earning your way over there and, I’ll make things right with the Baroness,” Thomas told them. “Don’t you worry about a thing.”
The girls nodded.
“Now get clean and get some sleep. You all look absolutely knackered.” Thomas shooed them away with a wave of his hands.
The girls thanked him and went to put up their horses.
“It’s not fair of us to stay really,” Regina said.
“We aren’t even riding camp horses anymore.” Abigail said.
“We’re just taking up space.” Brittany agreed.
Lily sighed. “I still feel a bit bad.”
“Same,” Elsa said.
“Yeah, we sort of manipulated and engineered this and still, I feel bad. We should do something for Mr. Moorland for putting up with us. You know, a thank you.” Stacy said.
“We saved his stable from being taken over by G.E.D. and being bulldozed to the ground. What more of a thank you does he need?” Regina groaned.
“I dunno. A puppy?”
The girls giggled.
“I mean. We could give him a duck. We’ve got plenty.”
“A cat,” Elsa said.
They were far too tired. So, it was far too funny for what the joke really was. They laughed hysterically until tears rolled down their eyes.
Then, they got baths, and slept like the dead.
FOR THE ACCOMPANYING IMAGES PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE MY WATERMARK AND CONTACT INFORMATION. THANK YOU. I get it. Some of you might get excited and want to see this stuff in the game, especially the clothes, tack, and pets. However, the only way I want to see this in the game is if I get paid for it. If I see it in the game and I’m not paid for it, there will be hell to pay. You think I’m salty. I’d be angry. Personally, I’m not going to send this info to SSO. If you do, leave my contact information there! Don’t give them any excuses to steal.
Now, I’ll know you haven’t read this note if you leave me comments about how ‘salty’ I am about the game and if I hate it so much I should do something else. I am doing something else. It’s called Mystic Riders MMORPG Project. Mystic Riders however is a very baby phase game. You can check out our plans on the game dev blog. (Skills, Factions, Professions, Crafting, Mini-Games, 25+ horse breeds!) If you know anyone who would be interested and has money or contacts about game making, direct them to the blog.
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peterstanslizzie · 4 years
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Re-watching Lizzie Mcguire: Episode 1.25 (Facts of Life)
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We should give this trio a group name. I mean, Andi Mack has the ‘Good Hair Crew’, which comprises of Andi, Buffy and Cyrus. So, it’s only fitting that we give this group a name. Any ideas?
- Gordo has too many eggs in one basket; On top of having to finish three book reports and a science project, he decided to burden himself even more by joining glee club. This is so he can diversity his school resume with non-academic activities. 
- Side note: It’s cool that the writers acknowledged that Miranda had joined glee club back in episode 1.14 since it was kinda randomly thrown into that episode. 
- Mr. Escobar clearly isn’t impressed with his students’ singing chops and urges them to practice at home. After their glee club session, Lizzie suggests to her friends they should try out for the ‘Fact-athlon’. They don’t think it’s a great idea since Gordo is already under a lot of stress.
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Getting a reward is always good motivation
- But when Lizzie brings up the fact that the winners will get a free trip to Miami, the tone suddenly shifts from nay to yay. Plus. this would be a nice addition to Gordo’s already packed resume. 
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Bring it on ‘Fact-athlon’!
Preparation
- Lizzie and Miranda are busy studying and quizzing each other History facts in Lizzie’s living room. Gordo arrives and is supposed to bring donuts for his friends but he ate them on the way. That’s literally me lol. 
- Gordo mentions to them that they need to get a faculty advisor for their team. Lizzie suggests a teacher who has a huge head but apparently, Kate has already snatched him; So I guess Kate’s also competiting in the ‘Fact-athlon’. Luckily, Gordo says they have Mrs. Trimmer as their back-up. 
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“What does a cannibal call a phonebook? A menu”. I don’t think jokes are Lizzie’s thing lmao.
- The next day in school, Gordo draws up a study plan that recommends 4 hours of studying each day in preparation for the upcoming competition. I have a lot of respect for those who are willing to put themselves through these kind of things, even if it’s all for a prize. 
- We come to find out that Mrs. Trimmer has left the country (for no stated reason...) and Mr. Dig will be replacing her as their advisor for the ‘Fact-athlon’. I think Mr. Dig is great and all but good luck to them lol. I will still give him the benefit of the doubt though. 
Team Lizzie vs Team Kate
- We come to find out later that ‘Team Kate’ comprises of her, Claire and Larry; Smart strategy to rope in Larry. Team Lizzie is about to start their study session with Mr. Dig and they brought in with them every math book they can get their hands on from the school library. 
- But with Mr. Dig, you can’t expect to have a conventional study session with him; The only study tool he’ll be using to teach math is a deck of cards. This doesn’t sit well with Gordo because he feels that they should be studying from books and not from playing blackjack. Gordo and I share the same sentiment on this. 
- But after getting teased by Miranda for being an “old man at 13″, Gordo decides to go along with Mr. Dig’s creative way of teaching Math, Science, English and History. And we then get to see a montage of him doing just that. 
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No shade but Team Lizzie is just clowning around whilst Team Kate is actually doing the proper preparation for the ‘Fact-athlon’. Don’t get me wrong, Mr. Dig’s method of teaching by showing is definitely effective but when it comes to a trivia competition, cramming facts into your brain as much as you can in a short period of time is the best strategy. 
Day of the Fact-athlon
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Team Kate is getting down to business but as you can see, 2 of the 3 members are a nervous-wreck
VS
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Team Lizzie seems confident but maybe a little too confident
- The competition then kicks off with English History and Team Kate is owning Team Lizzie from the get-go. As expected, Team Lizzie doesn’t know all the black and white facts like the dates and names when it comes to historic events. 
- As Team Lizzie continues to get creamed in the ‘Fact-athlon’, Lizzie comes up with a plan to get out of the competition without forfeiting by telling Gordo to fake being sick and asking Miranda to trigger the water sprinklers. They follow the plan accordingly and manage to get themselves out of the embarrassing situation they were in. If I were them, I would be worried about getting punished for doing all of that lol.
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I love how Gordo committed to his fake heart-attack though 
- After the whole fainting and water-sprinklers fiasco, Team Lizzie are sitting on the stairwell suffering from their epic defeat. Team Kate rubs in their faces that they’ve lost so badly that Mr. Dig is quitting as a teacher. Yikes! Now things are getting serious.
- The find Mr. Dig packing his things from the classroom and they plead with him not to quit. They tell him that they’ve learned a lot from him and he has shown them that learning can be fun and how seemingly boring subjects like World History can be interesting. Now that’s the ultimate goal of a teacher; To inspire his/her students.
- Also, it turns out that going to Miami wasn’t the best prize for Team Kate:
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Kate got bit by sand fleas, Claire stepped on a sea urchin and Larry got extreme sunburn. Wow, they were really unlucky over there.
B-Plot: Matt and Lanny are Starting A Band
- In the kitchen, Matt asks his parents if they have any musical instruments lying around the house that they can borrow. Sam suggests his old guitar he had used when he was in his own band with his cousin and his friend called “Midnight Sam and the Love Patrol”. Matt, Lanny and even Jo don’t seem impressed with this and they even laughed at the idea that he was in a band. 
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The song they were playing in this video was actually pretty good. I wonder if it’s an actual song in real life?
- Before I continue, I have always wondered why isn’t Matt in school for majority of these episodes whilst Lizzie is? I know this is a fictional show but it’s a funny pattern I’ve been noticing for quite some time now. 
- Anyways, they are holding auditions to find a third band member in the backyard and Matt’s parents seem to be okay with the idea; They are such chill parents, I can’t. After viewing a bunch of ‘meh’ performances (well I thought that the oboe player was pretty good), they finally get a good audition...from a grown man by the name of Rick Marotta.
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This is an adult who wants to be in a band with a couple of kids....I have questions
- I looked up Rick Marotta and he’s legit a big-time drummer in real life! His credits include playing with Linda Ronstadt, James Taylor, Steely Dan, John Lennon (as mentioned in the show) plus Carly Simon, Stevie Nicks and Randy Newman. Woah, impressive! But anyways, he is the best one so far and he gets the gig! Later, they start playing together for the first time and let’s just say, they don’t sound too good.
- It then escalates to the point where Sam and Jo can’t even stand the sound of them playing anymore. It’s cute how they don’t want to disappoint Matt by telling what he can or can’t do but if I were them, I would definitely put my foot down and ask them to stop the ruckus. Like please.
- We fast forward two days later on Sunday and Matt’s band is holding their first ever live performance and I must say; They look stylin’:
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And they gave an incredible performance. Bravo! Of course it’s unrealistic for them to get so good after a short period of time but hey, I can definitely let this slide. 
- In the end, however, Matt and Lanny want to move on to another hobby instead of continuing on with their band *facepalms
Overall Thoughts
- I really enjoyed re-watching this episode. They did a great job making an episode that centers around a ‘Fact-athlon’ quite entertaining. Plus, the writing and the dialog used in this episode was really witty. Kudos to Douglas Tuber & Tim Maile for writing this episode. 
- I also like how they showcased the contrast between traditional ways of studying versus interactive/non-conventional ways of studying. Obviously, the former is more effective when it comes to trivia contests/quizzes but the latter makes students enjoy and really soak up what they’re learning. I also have to give props to Arvie Lowe Jr. for doing a great job as Mr. Dig in this particular episode. I loved seeing the bond between him and Lizzie, Gordo and Miranda. Teachers like him are absolutely gold.
- As for Matt and Lanny’s storyline, it was pretty good. I obviously don’t care about it as much as I do with the A-storyline but I definitely have to give them credit for their performance towards the end of the episode; It was great and I also like how Matt/Lanny didn’t annoy me as much as usual lol. 
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cuthie · 4 years
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A DK Story: To The Worgen Who Killed Me
(( Short rp post. I didn’t plan on roleplaying on this character, just made her to work on heritage armor. But since I play mostly silly or zany characters, figured I’d go dark for a chapter. ))
  All around the globe, the tangent realm of Ny'alotha crept and blurred in shadows, visions and full fledged assaults. Even in little unheard of hamlets, the world grew dark. For one Gilnean and his bride to be, those concerns were on pause. A decorated soldier of the fourth war, James understood his responsibilities, hearing the call of the war horn so soon after having finally ended the Horde. Well, as final as King Anduin would allow. In one week he was to wed his childhood sweetheart Linda, and unfortunately there would be no honeymoon. His pack needed him. Azeroth needed him. Still, for the next seven days, all that was compartmentalized into the back of his mind. All that mattered was the love of his life and every waking moment he got to spend with her.
    Westfall wasn’t so bad. Linda’s parents had farmland with plenty of acres and animals. James grinned as his fiance road past him, her black steed galloping ahead. She wanted to race a wolf? Heh. In a swift transformation, bones popped, coarse hair erupted in tufts all around his mutating body and he dropped down to four large clawed paws. There was no horse alive that could outrun him when he was shifted into his real form.
Real.
  How many years ago had he considered it his monstrous secret? A horror show come to life. But now? He embraced the wolf and the powers that be that blessed his kindred with its strength and speed. He could leap buildings, he could throw a cart over his head and send it hurling twenty yards. He could, most assuredly, outrace some cute as a button bumpkin on her country stallion. 
  But something went wrong. Linda’s horse collapsed, landing on it side and crushing her leg. James dug into the terrain, throwing dirt behind his claws as he scented the winds. The rot of undeath cling to the air as the temperature dropped at least twenty degrees. Before he could make it to his beloved, his feet went numb, then piercing in pain as they froze together. He bit the ground with a yelp as a small voice echoed through the air.
“Do you remember me? You -”
  Linda’s cries interrupted the ghostly voice, “James, my leg! I can’t- What’s going on!?”  The human girl’s outburst was cut off by her own gurgling convulsions. Her body was lifted from underneath the weight of the dead horse, it’s blood having been splattered all over the human’s carefully chosen tomboy attire. As Linda rose in the air her hands reached for her neck. A dark necrotic energy had lassoed itself around her, beginning to crush her windpipe as she was pulled towards a small figure in black robes. A vulpine woman with dirty red fur and misty ice blue eyes.
  The echoing voice continued, “You burned our caravans to the ground.” The little figure began to pad on dead paws, worms writhing where two toes should have been. James, furious, slammed his fists into his icy shackles in an attempt to free himself.
  “I tried to protect my people, sword and hand, ill fitting Zandalari armor on my chest. It did nothing to stop you. A wolf and a fox, a monster and a soldier. For my death and countless others, you were awarded honor. Medals. A bride.”
  Linda couldn’t speak, tears in her eyes and blood beginning to trickle down her nose. Linda couldn’t but James could, “Your fight is with me, leave her out of this. The Horde and Alliance are no longer at war! You want me, come get me.”
  The walking corpse didn’t say anything more. Instead, Linda’s body floated higher into the air, then threw itself against the hard Westfall ground headfirst. The first impact was enough to snap the girl’s neck and end her life, but it wasn’t enough for the vulpera death knight. The human’s limp body rose and descended again and again, her head bursting open like a pinata, flesh and bone fragments splattering the grass. Over and over her head was pulverized.
  James had never known such agony. He freed himself from his bonds and leapt onto the Vulpera, his maw easily fitting her entire head as he crunched down. For half a moment he had won, despite having lost everything. The Vulpera was in his mouth, his teeth locked down, his heels dug into the rocks and he slung her back and forth. It was disgusting, filthy and oozing into his mouth. Yet the head did not give in, did not cave. He had the jaw strength to crush a tauren’s skull between his sharpened teeth, yet not some fox?
  Laughter echoed inside his own muzzle as claws dug into his chest and lips. Two feet pressed themselves against his upper torso as a pair of hands easily parted his jaws. The death knight had pried herself free, then flipped away to safety. James’s nails tried to dig in, tried to keep a hold on the murderess’ tiny body but to no avail.
  A runeblade was drawn, those piercing misty eyes somehow glowing bright. James dropped to all fours, then ran and leapt at her again. This time he felt a sword catch him in the stomach. With the strength of a beast twenty times her size, the Vulpera had impaled the Worgen, bathing in the shower of his blood as she held him overhead. Licking the crimson droplets from her snout, the death knight flung the worgen away as if he weighed nothing.
“Raise her.”
  Another shadowy figure emerged. How had James not seen him? A blood elf? Another scourge knight. With a nonchalant flick of the wrist, the elf stared at the fallen human girl, her brains a paste along the hard ground. Linda’s body twitched, jerked and stood up. Her head swiveled, contorted with a broken neck unable to support itself. It turned unnaturally to lock eyes onto her bleeding worgen fiance.
“Kill.”
  And then the ghoul leapt onto her former lover, trying to pry his eyes out with dirty fingernails. James’ voice lost it’s harsh tone, it was defeated and sad as it pleaded, “What have they done to you? What have they done to you!? Please, come back to me.”
  Vengeance served, the vulpera turned to the elf, nodding once before the pair disappeared into a portal to an icy realm.
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