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berryunho · 9 months

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Just binge-read The Answer in a day and let me say that the plot is fucking insane, how the hell do you people come up with something so intense? Lmao, anyways I love reacting to mc's actions and inner monologue like a bff hearing some tea over a videocall "girl no he stabbed you, dont think about him as a normal person, he isnt one, with him its supposed to be throwing hands on sight for sURVIVAL"

And yet I still managed to get gaslit, girlbossed and gatekept by her relationship with san, tell me why I was here reading chapter 29 and thinking "wow he really is bringing up some red flags now after that fight" and then had to stop myself right there because the very first red flag that man had raised was from the very beginning wheRE HE GREETS HER TO THE CULT *BC HE IS PART OF THE MF CULT*

I CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR IT, WTF

Anyways, can't wait for more, but take your time lol, I am as excited as everyone else but you are doing this for free and with something this good it's honestly such a service, thanks for all the effort <3 hope you're doing well and hope that you keep writing even after or outside of The Answer because you genuinely do such an amazing job building up descriptions and characters, I am very curious about everything we are yet to see, and I did wanna ask, sorry if you have answered this before, but do you already have an ending planned for the story?

- 👁👁

UM ? I LOVE YOU WAIT LET ME PUT THE OTHER MESSAGES UNDER THE READ MORE AND THEN RESPOND LAKDJF;ALKSDFJ

Just wanted to add that not only do I react like a nosy bff in a call with the mc as I read The Answer, but I also judge the absolute hell out of her choices not as in "this is gonna get you killed" but as in "I would 100% be going tinfoil hat in HJ's ass about the other world ages ago for entertainment alone" I CAN'T BE THE ONLY ONE CMON Mr Cultist wants me to go from city dwelling college student to hillbilly cult wifey in 2 days? HE TAKES AWAY MY PHONE ONLY TO TELL ME HIS BIBLE FANFIC IS BASED OFF THE SHIFTING REALITIES COMMUNITY? THE ONE THAT WAS BIG ON TIKTOK IN 2021? Be fucking for real, I would, on day 1, sit down in front of him and go "already, so whats up with the other you? You two still chat? Also whats up with his version of Hwa? Is he a petty little shit too? Are they in a questionable fwb situationship too? Do you still get prophecies? If so, why are there so many prints of your walmart bible around? Cause that seems like an awful waste when you will inevitably have to print just as many more with the new updates so wtf" He takes away my entertainment when I have the attention span of a 4 year old? Fine, he is gonna have to entertain *me* now to make up for it, bible study time? More like you are now my social media outlet where I'm gonna rant about my crazy theories, my favorite ships and I will overanalyze each and every plot hole in your bible sir, I don't care that its a prophecy, I want consistency from your writing about the other world, I want detailed descriptions, I want to feel like I am there, how do you expect to win New York's best seller with this vague ass paragraph about your little lost boys crew in trenchcoats? I'm gonna annoy him into killing me and realizing I'm not the one, his stalking time all going down the drain. I consider this an absolute win for me.

Okay I'm so sorry for sending another ask when I just sent two humongous ones lol but I did remember one thing I wanted to ask and I hope it doesn't come off wrong bc I mean nothing bad about it at all but back when HJ was all "I'm only gonna do the devils tango with you when you beg me to uwu" and mc thinks "damn, at least my local cult leader got some consent morals going" I couldn't help but stop myself and wonder: girl. He made out with you. In front of at least 40 people. When you were drugged. Clearly tripping. By his orders. And he stabbed you right after but most importantly he has bragged about making out with you IN FRONT OF A CROWD WHEN YOU WERE TRIPPING BY HIS OWN DESIGN And yknow, my question is: was mc's (continuous) lapse in judgment in this moment to blame for her not realizing he in fact does not give a flying fuck about consent and she just let that slide bc the cult mentality was getting to her (which we do see progress over the story, and its been one of the most interesting parts of the fic btw, I think you did really well with that) or did you not mean for it to be that and I read too much into it? Lol because yeah he is a self admitted and apparently diagnosed psycho but you'd think he would see how this morals he just tried to brag and seduce her with are not moralling at all. Or maybe he just hoped she wouldn't realize his delusional-moral compass isn't gonna point correctly no matter what way he tries, I'm definitely thinking too hard about it at this point lmao HE REALLY IS GETTING INTO MY PARANOID BRAIN, THE MIND GAMES ARE CONSUMING ME FR Anyways, again, sorry for the long asks one right after the other, I'll stop pestering now.

I fucking lied, I'm sending another one to ask if you happen to have any fics to recommend that maybe give off The Answer vibes or that you think may be a good read while we are all on standby bc I just got hit by the withdrawals-after-a-good-fic now that I realized I can't keep reading since I got to the last chapter lol. I'm so sorry. - 👁👁

first of all let me say it again: i love you. thank you so much for reading the answer and for being kind and for wanting to tell me and ask me so many things!! i really, really appreciate it and pls dont feel bad for sending me asks (big or small) bc it just makes me SO happy lol i feel bad that you've been waiting for a response for so long but LKJF:KDJF:AKDF I WILL DO MY BEST TO ADDRESS EVERYTHING so here we go:

I did wanna ask, sorry if you have answered this before, but do you already have an ending planned for the story?

hehe no worries at all!! i do have an ending planned and i know how we will get there, but there are certain elements and plot points that aren't solid yet and could be changed!! but i am set on the ending ^^

the entire second ask is just so valid. like tbh i would absolutely be the same. like id be scared af for a few days but once i realized i wasnt gonna like DIE immediately and that i could get away with annoying hj like at least a little bit id be on his ass. honestly and truly the main reason that i havent written more of like... the answer in the story is bc im too concerned that anything i wrote would be torn apart for analysis when i wouldnt actually be reading that far into it LKJA;SKFDJSD bc like you're right anything that hj would be writing would be very pertinent information TO HIM but like... does it actually mean anything... or is it just words... LOL idk if that makes sense but everytime i try to write like in the style of a religious text with the answer lore it sounds so ridiculous i just cannot take myself seriously enough to do it KLAJKS;DFJASKFD BUT HELP YOU POINTING OUT THE SHIFTING LORE? LITERALLY THE EXACT SYSTEM I STOLE THIS LORE FROM I HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS DOING WHEN I STARTED WRITING I WAS JUST LIKE idfk whats something weird that i can connect to the ateez lore that i dont remotely understand AND THATS WHAT I CAME UP WITHALKDSFLA;JDSFJLSKDJ you are real

And yknow, my question is: was mc's (continuous) lapse in judgment in this moment to blame for her not realizing he in fact does not give a flying fuck about consent and she just let that slide bc the cult mentality was getting to her (which we do see progress over the story, and its been one of the most interesting parts of the fic btw, I think you did really well with that) or did you not mean for it to be that and I read too much into it?

eheheeheheheheh i really was waiting for someone to point this one out!!! i definitely meant it to be a lapse in her judgement and like a ...... hmmm idk how to put it like she's selectively forgetting things that don't match with what she WANTS to believe !! like personally i would never in my life write a member of ateez to be a rapist so we obvs won't be worrying about that BUT if this were a real situation, that would probably be a very real fear to have and i figured it would be a good thing to address in case anyone was like. worried about that. LKAJSKFDJASDLFK but yes you're right they're obviously not above MURDER so like. how much credit can we give them. its really just mc wanting desperately to alleviate some of her fear and believe that she is at least a tiny bit safe (even though that is CLEARLY not the case)

if you happen to have any fics to recommend that maybe give off The Answer vibes or that you think may be a good read while we are all on standby

heh this one is tough because ... im not really a fanfic reader LAKJDFKLAJSDFK but my beloved mutuals bee (@atzfilm) and caly (@hongism) are geniuses hehe !! bee writes dark fics that are mwah chefs kiss and caly writes mists of celeste which has a toxic unyielding leader hongjoong. so. you know.

SO YEAH ANYWAYS? THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN FOR THESE ASKS AJDKFALSDKFJSKLDJ AND IM SORRY AGAIN THAT IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO REPLY AND THAT THE UPDATE IS ALSO TAKING FOREVER LOL I HOPE YOU'RE STILL AROUND LAKJDFLKSJDF

#👁👁 anon #answered

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randomyuu · 11 months

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An attempt at eyeballing.

Not a fanart of any fanfic, but Yuuji and Gojou are used as my sacrificial lambs for my amateurish attempt at muscle studying (which is just eyeballing). Sorry guys.

Anyone who can draw muscles is absolutely amazing. Like, how in the world did you manage to wrap your head around this bizarre thing called muscles??? I swear, just looking at muscles I’ll be like “oh, that looks cool” or something.

Then I tried drawing it and am amazed and lowkey horrified at how many lines you can put to create the buff look. Like??? That is so cool? But also… weird? It just dawns on me. The human body can do this? The muscles can contract and elongate like this? Wtf???

This is what happens when you did not study the basics during the first stage of self-learning, I guess.

Here is the step-by-step process and images and my thoughts on it:

References

Here are the sources for Gojou's pose and Yuuji's pose.

I just… uh… I actually didn’t know what I am doing (and still don’t). But I want to start somewhere because I want to also be able to confidently draw muscles. So I just google searched “male muscle pose” with Gojou and Yuuji in mind. I’m in the mood to draw them, so yeah. Poor guys.

I don’t know what was on my mind when I was getting the pose for Yuuji, because his waist is not that thin. That would be Gojou’s lol. But this is eyeballing, not tracing. I get to decide what changes I want to make (and pray it won’t turn disastrous).

2. Rough sketch? Shapes?

This is what I usually do when drawing. This helps me to roughly guess the size and position of the objects before I dedicate my time to sketching the details. No heads because uh... I forgot.

3. Sketch

A really big jump from the rough shape, I know. And if you overlapped them, they just roughly matches.

This is where I start to properly eyeball. I start from the middle—the shoulder, down to the waist. Create the centre of the body first. Then I continue with the arms and heads. I separate the head in another layer because sometimes I have problems with head size.

Then I realise I’m not really sure if Yuuji’s waist is thin or not, so off googling the anime pics I went. And uh… he has a thin-ish waist…? Kind of…? Not as thin as Gojou in the manga, that’s for sure. I was going through a dilemma here lmao. I want to be as accurate to the canon, but also I’m not that capable to make a perfect duplicate so what is the fine balance to keep?

And I give up and decide to give Yuuji a bit of a curve.

4. Final lining with details (aka Gojou's and Yuuji's heads)

So uh… I actually didn’t plan to make the line this… clean? It was supposed to be a casual retracing with some sketchy lines but cleaner than the sketch. But midway my brain suggested playing with line weights and I just obeyed. The same also applied to the shading, it was unplanned.

Final thoughts:

Hm... considering this is my first time really, REALLY, dedicating my time to draw muscles and no other things along the way, it was... okay. I guess. Overall pretty happy. Definitely could be better.

Gojou looks better than Yuuji. My boy looks a bit off, I'm so sorry Yuuji :") It's because I have drawn characters' backs (clothed) before, so I'm quite familiar with it. But Yuuji's pose was a new one, so I guess that is to be expected.

So… that’s it. I hope this silly post informs/helps/entertains you in some way. If not, that’s okay, just ignore the post haha. I might be back next weekend with another drawing. Maybe. It’s a month of uncertainties for me. No promises.

Welp. Until then, see ya!

#yuu's post #yuu's art #gojou satoru #itadori yuuji #a drawing attempt #so I was googling the references right #then I track down the original source #Yuuji's source has “sexy muscular man” in the title #and it cracks me up for no reason #maybe because “sexy” does not come to my mind when looking through all the poses #I just want to find something safe yet challenging enough to draw lol

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arugulalover · 2 years

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gahhhhhhhh so much is happening rn i am feeling very overwhelmed heheheheheh 🏄‍♀️🏄‍♀️✌

#first of all i have fucking covid #so i cant leave my apartment which is my worst fucking nightmare #esp when its finally getting warm and theres only 2 more weeks of fucking college and i wanna see my frirends #and also theres the fucking mcat #and i dont think ive studied enough #but like wtf am i supposed to do?????? keep studying ??? lmao lmao lol lol #and im so scared im gonna fail it and be fucked #and its a lose lose bc i either study for mcat or for my finals but if i dont pass either one i lose my med school seat #and i havent been to my bio lecture in like 2 weeks #bc ive been doing all this shit for my poetry class #which is almost all done so thank god for that but at the same time i dont want it to be over bc getting to teach poetry workshops #to 4th graders has been the best thing ever and i literally just cried in the shower thinkng abt thier poems and how profound they r #but also i am stressed about drama w a and o #bc i texted a abt our project and also covid and they nvr replied #and i feel bad bc they prob think im talking shit w o #but i feel so stuck in the middle and geuinely sad for a #bc everyone seems to dislike them and i get why but also i just feel really bad when there is drama #like a must be really sad rn and i have spent sm time w them i hope they r doing okay #also also i missed out on the dnd campagin we have been planning for fucking months #so now everyone has bonded w/o me and YES i have fomo and i think that is so valid of me #like r u serious group bonding dnd oneshot that I PLANNED and i have to miss it??????#honey.post

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its-an-inxp-again · 3 years

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SP/so vs SO/sx

Not sure how much this can be generalized since it's only my personal experience. When I was a pre-teen my best friend used to be a so/sx 6w7, while I am 9w1 sp/so. Sp dom vs Sp blind... some stuff went down and it’s fascinating to analyze such differences to me (I feel like I'm fascinated by sp blinds in general wtf).

She was the V immature of the pair, throwing herself in any possible weird experience she could have just for the sake of it. She would always cause so much drama it was legit concerning and I always was on the sidelines, not participating and sometimes suggesting her to stop, but did she listen to me? Never, and also, in some ways, I think I did in fact understand her desire to feel alive and feel stuff and do dumb stuff, possibly in that I am sx-blind and I won't fucking allow myself to do that, while she totally did. I guess, I don't usually pay any mind to my sx-blindness but the only time that it kind of felt like I was missing on something was when I would spend time with her? And also now that I'm actually studying the instictual variants I guess I'm starting to realize it (but also not really there's a shit ton of work to do). She would always act as if she was the protagonist of some weird 19th romantic novel but, make it dumber (we were 11-12 after all, how smart could we be?).

I deeply, deeply understand her need and wish to be like a novel protagonist. I do think of myself in that way quite often. But while she did it by acting and getting actively involved in stuff, I’ve always done the same by hyper-interpreting my simpler, more boring experiences (9 basic bitch here, feeling attached to something while being withdrawn and out of touch with your body results in amazing fantasy sky castles). She was never satisfied by this.

If she wanted intensity, she would create it by idk, doing some dumb stuff she would for sure later regret. While she went on to feel so alive, I would stay in the back overthinking my more boring life. An example would be that while she actually acted so that everyone around us hated her and shunned her, I would simply feel and think I was being shunned as well, but in practice I would never do something that would elicit a strong reaction out of others. I basically fantasized about it. As you can tell her being a Social Dominant I guess she got the sx juice she wanted through social stuff (her reputation, going against the social system (social 6s often do that)).

In so many ways, if I were to simplify it, she was a mixture of Dorian Gray and Heathcliff and I was Des Esseintes. She was an edgier version of Dorian Gray, wanting to experience everything but make it dark and painful and tormented (a là Heathcliff), not once holding herself back. Des Esseintes, on the other hand, would also feel like a misfit and a tormented soul but he did so by staying inside his house and hyper-interpreting his experiences to an insane degree, until he basically starts to hallucinate. He barely goes outside of his home and when he does everything seems weird, scary, magical in its own way, and while a bit creepy that’s also part of being sx-blind I think? You secretly want that way of feeling alive via the dark things in life (not sure if my fixes have a part in this as idk other 9s may not relate to this maybe) but also you want to go about it safely (sp) and by not exposing yourself (9), so it becomes like wearing a pair of glasses that adds a layer of poetry and beauty and suffering to an otherwise normal, boring and inane reality (again, 9 fantasy shit). But that’s about it. It’s a magical pair of glasses that at times I feel like I can remove and put on at will when I’m bored and I feel like I want more out of life. Outsourcing sx if you will w/o ever acting on this shit. I relate to Des Esseintes even though he was possibly a sp 4 but whatever I guess...

My old friend, being sp-blind, of course did not feel the same need for “safety” and had nothing to hold her back, really... the 6w7 sp blind brings a lot of energy and a way to never be able to fucking stand still, so yeah... it was so fascinating to see her act that differently from me, but also empathizing with her desire to get MORE out of life and dive into the darker aspects of it. I guess that’s why I sticked with her even when I thought she was being unreasonable and annoyingly melodramatic. Most people would shun her and don’t get her ways and while I can’t say that I got her, I would at least sympathise with her wish to experience more and be dramatic, even if I couldn’t quite elaborate it at the time and I superficially thought she was being too immature (this is so funny, we were fucking 10 and we were already doing instictual stuff with me acting like the adult one idk. Also w1 may play a part in this shit. Me being sp dom felt like I was supposed to check on her but also I didn't really do it because it was fun to tag along with her dumb stuff). But while she had the courage(?) to act on such a wish, I did not - I never had it, and instead compensated by having an hyperactive mental landscape...

There was a Wilde’s quote that went like, “the artist always represents what they themselves cannot live and experience”, or whatever, and I’ve always related to it way too deeply, lmao. I would represent, think, imagine, write the stories, and instead she would actively live them. Also Wilde was a so/sx so I guess that means something

While I may be bitter, because even as a sx-blind I at times feel....... like I want to live and get involved in stuff more? also I guess 9s have a way to dissociate with their life quite easily so that doesn't help (a sx-blind 7 would probably feel like they're getting involved more). Plus possibly having a 5fix makes it worse? it kind of sucks tbfh. Like it feels I've been dissociated since I was 4 yo and never got back to actual earth wtf. 95x sp/so may be the most fucking boring thing on earth + it may bring a neurotic need to keep your little bubble untouched by real life and finding security in that bubble, to the point that you're actually missing out. Idk. I may *do* stuff to make me feel like I'm going around with people more but it doesn't really affect me that deeply so yeah... fuck all of this. It's not even the same as being stuck in your comfort zone? I guess it is but again I may at times challenge myself in some small ways and have new experiences but it's like nothing really reaches me idk.

Again, I usually prefer to go about stuff safely (aka not disrupting my little bubble too much), and in this way, I’ve always had way less regrets than her - so in this, I’m actually fine with my way of playing it safe. I like letting myself wear that pair of glasses when I feel like it and call it a day. I’ve always been content with very little...

Though honestly I’ve not been hanging out with her in years (at least 8 years, wow) and while I do hear from her I can’t say I can get to see how much she’s changed, lol

It was weird, you’d expect that with such a melodramatic friend the break up would be at least as dramatic, instead it has been quite the opposite - we simply slowly stopped reaching out to each other once we had nothing much in common anymore, and something else going on with our lives, lmao...

Also I mistyped her as a 4w3 in the past but it's so funny I got that little about the enneagram and IVs and somehow got her IV right at first try wtf I guess she's just that obvious

#enneagram #enneagram 5 #enneagram 4 #instinctual variants #so/sx #social instinct #long post #sometimes i say stuff #ennea5 #ennea4 #enneagram 6 #enneagram test #ennea9 #enneagram 9 #ennea6 #ennea 6 #ennea 9 #sp/so

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riskeith · 3 years

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omg hi. sorry i disappeared for a few days, been super busy with school. i missed you a lot. how have you been?

i haven’t had the need to eat any food since i got barbara and noelle on my team. if one of them can’t shield, the other comes in a clutch haha. *bows* thank you ladies for your service.

i’d pay hard earned money to see fanart with the boy scouts playing with guoba.. :( and YEAH. that would be so fitting? + it’s gonna be liyue themed which is super nice. do you know any predictions over which four stars will be in xiao’s banner? and who do /you/hope will be there?

last time i played three days ago unlocked dragonspine.. i even did albedo’s quest i can’t believe i defeat that evil place sjshdksk. meaning i got so some primogems and some intertwined fate. i’ve been itching to use some of the intertwined fates to get xiangling c rate up... should i?

october 20 is such a cute bday. you know how some dates just look nice? that’s one of them shskdhs. i want to say my birthday too but i feel like if anyone reads our messages they’ll know who i am... sorry. you’ll have to wait for that information until we privately talk some day. big promise. 🤍

ooh. you kind of wing it too, then! in some ways. if you’re not feeling it do you leave the fic for the day after or give up on it for a while? (so many question... shut up @ me) i’m the same as you! but i also write sometimes in the day time and i feel like that’s when i produce my best work. yesterday i was at a cafe studying and during a break i just started writing a fic and for some reason it just flowed so nicely? so yeah idk skdjdhsk. whenever it strikes i suppose.

i do borrow my books sadly. i kind of have to because i don’t have anymore place to put my books (we live in a small apartment) and books are kind of expensive :( i don’t mind borrowing though because i don’t really reread books unless they’re super special so it’s fine. do you buy yours? I HAVE READ LEGEND. i read it waaaay back in grade school haha, it’s been ages ago. i’ve never seen anyone say it’s their favorite but i can see why you feel that way. it’s kind of underrated in the community for sure.

dude fuck... chongyun and xingqiu live in my mind rent free. i kid you not i just can’t stop thinking about those boys... please send me all the fanart you find i’ll literally give you my life for that <3

i just listened to the g-idle song and AAA? wtf? i used to really like them while i was into kpop and this is so nostalgic to me. i haven’t listened to kpop in literally years shdkdhdk. this song is great thank you for sending it, do you like g-idle? <3

WAIT ARE YOU MAKING A SECOND ACC? I WAS LITERALLY CONSIDERING DOING ONE IN ASIA FOR YOU... shdjdhdjshsjsj our minds. and yes i’m in american server... oh god. our co-op date can happen? 🥺 but if it’s too much work for you i’ve seriously actually considered doing one in asia for me i’m totally fine with starting all over so.. 🥺

god i’ve missed talking to you so much. once again i’m sorry for not being here, but hopefully after tomorrow’s exam school will be a bit more chill and i’ll be yours again.

hope you’ve been well babe. mwah!

hi!! that’s alright ahah, i assumed that was the case. i’ve been well!! and then not so well bc we weren’t talking 🤪 needless to say i’ve missed you a lot too <333

omggg QUEENS!!! i don’t have any healers but i don’t eat food either... LMFAO unless it’s a boss fight i’ll just keep going until i’m done with whatever it is then go heal at a statue fsdhfkdjs

!!! brb just gonna go get good at art so i can draw that for u 😩 i don’t have any predictions myself, but i’ve seen people say it’ll be ningguang + beidou + barbara possibly?? but of course, i would hope that xingqiu was there <3333 he can appear twice in a row come on mhy <3333 just think about that <333 and omggg i’d wish if chongyun came as well.. i really want to get him to c6 (but he was only two banners ago?) hbu do you have any thoughts on the matter~

AHAHAH good job im proud of you 😤😤 show that nasty place who’s boss!! if you want to, I don’t see why not! it’ll get you closer to pity as well so by the time venti is near, hopefully it won’t take you much to get him! lmk how it goes!!!! manifesting c6 xiangling for you 🔥

fhskdf thank you... is it weird to say i agree? FHDSKFHSDKFKJ like. 20/10 or 10/20... nice even multiples of ten numbers.. AHAHAH. no need to apologise at all!! 🤍🤍🤍🤍 share whatever you’re comfortable with whenever you’re comfortable <33

hm it depends. (i just reaslised i said this exact phrasing last time too lmfao) i think i usually give up on it for a while? but sometimes i try to force myself through it too, just to get over that section so i can hopefully move on to a better one wait sorry i misread your question LOL. i usually leave it for the day as opposed to give up on it for a while! if i’m actively working on something i’d prefer to continue working at it slowly, even if the progress is just me opening the doc and then exiting after 5 mins fhdskj. are you the same? (NO!!! DO NOT SHUT UP @ YOU i never get to talk about writing processes pls im enjoying this a lot)

nice!! the vibes when writing during the day are sometimes better as well, bc it’s still light and stuff you’re not sitting in the dark or with a light on.. lol. it’s more ~natural~ & omg legendary... i love that for you!! on that note, do you usually study at school/cafes/libraries? i pretty much can only study at home, i hate doing it anywhere else.

ahh that’s fair :( and yeah i agree books can get so expensive? like the authors def deserve to be compensated for all their hard work but damn lmao. oh that’s a good point! i do buy books yeah, and i don’t even necessarily reread them i just like having them on the shelf fhdskfd (there are many i haven’t even read for the first time... oops.) what ages do grade school cover? sorry i have no idea what that means fhsjfkshsdkjs the different names for education levels will never not confuse me. !! yeah i really wish legend was more popular aaaaa

here are some recent arts i’ve bookmarked!! (rip i should find one more so every word is linked but cbs hfskdhfs) i’m also considering making a genshin twitter! idk why i’m so averse to following these amazing accs on my normal account lmaoo but i’m also thinking of posting pics from the 52485 photoshoots i do with chongyun..

oh nice!!! i’m really happy you liked it 🥰🥰🥰 and yeah i do like g-idle but i don’t stan them! that’s me with most groups tbh fshkfjsd but i do watch most of their MVs when they first come out~

FSHFKJSDHFKSD wait what if.. this but it’s us surprising each other in the other’s servers <33 and if i’m telling you the truth... i kinda despise the idea of playing in am*rica server FHSDKJFHSDKFHSDKKDSHFKSDHKKJ but we could compromise and both start again in europe?? ahah let me know what you think! if you’re happy to just do one in asia tho that’s fine as well~

me too!! and no worries for real, school comes first!! (even if it fkn sucks... @ school i hate you. i say, when i’m still on holidays FHDSKJFJS) aaaa good luck on your exam!!! i hope you smash it 💪💪

also um “and i’ll be yours again”??!?!?!?!? be still my beating heart 😩😩😩😩 i shall be waiting for you wifey hehe

hope you’ve been taking care of yourself!! kisses, c.r.

#marriage anon #wowclunaanswers #long post

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mistymark · 5 years

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the one with the annotations.

dong sicheng x reader // 3.7k words // masterlist // send requests here

summary; in which sicheng keeps writing in the books at the library and it should be obvious but that’s,,, not,,, allowed???

warnings: none its just fluff, theres some humour if u like,, squint

requested; yes :D - “Enemies to lovers 👀 with sicheng? Love your writing btw 💕” from anon

notes; based on this prompt: ”You’ve got to stop returning books full of corrections and spiteful comments in red pen bc I can’t stop reading them and my boss gives me disapproving glares when I laugh at the funny ones

ohhhhh boi

so while you were at uni you had a part time job at the library

because surprise surprise as a lit major you like books

shocker there

you always tried to work the late shifts, closing up and doing the returns

just because it was easy and relaxing organising and restacking the books

but soon you wished you took the earlier shifts

because of dong sicheng

not to be dramatic but

your long rival

he started coming to the library to borrow books

because that’s kind of the point of a library

but he ended up liking the environment for studying

and would stay there for hours just to study

and you’d admire his hardworking nature

if he left on time, that is

you would do the rounds ten minutes before closing

just to tell everyone like

‘hey, we’ll be closing in around ten minutes if you want to begin packing up’

but this bitch

would nEVER PACK UP ON TIME

you’d end up standing at his table with your bag and the keys in your hand

tapping on the wood to try and get his attention

and him slowly packing up afterwards

even tho he kNOWS you want to go home

‘you’re just as slow as you were in kindergarten hey?’

and he’d be so furious

‘you know you cheated’

‘I don’t remember any such thing’

and maybe you did maybe you didn’t

you were like four years old

as if you’d remember a race you won when you were that age

he just rolls his eyes and leaves as you lock the doors

you leave in the other direction

happily leaving him behind

but he stops by every Monday Tuesday and Thursday night to study

which are the days you work as well

he acts like it’s just part of his schedule

but he worked out if he came in on Wednesday’s he didn’t have the opportunity to annoy you

and honestly?

annoying you at the end of your shift and after a long session of studying was the highlight of his night

but he keeps borrowing books

and you’re like

whatever

until he borrows this new book you’ve been wanting to read for ages

and you were low-key so bitter

this lil bitch has no way of knowing you wanted that book but somehow he does and that’s the only reason he’s borrowed it

even though,, he literally had no idea lmao

tbh u probably would have wanted to talk to him about the books he reads bc u have very similar taste

okay the same taste

but he’s such an asshole ur like nah fam

anyways he returns it after a week

boy reads fast ok

and when he goes to drop it in the returns box

you just take it from his hand and scan it under your name straight away

and put it under the desk so no one else can borrow it

and when there’s a lull in the work at the library

you reach under the table for the book and rifle through it

and you notice a few pencil marks

and upon further inspection you realise they’re comments referencing certain parts of the book

and you do nOT stand for vandalism

but some of them are fuckin hilarious not gonna lie

on the page you just happened to open

you can see there’s a comment beside a passage of text depicting a fight scene

‘this would kill someone wtf’

and u laugh and wonder who had done this

like the book had only been out for a little while

and u finish it in just less than a week

bc u read a lot during your shifts

probably a lot more than you should tbh

and seriously the comments made the book better

you hadn’t laughed so hard at random commentary so much

like the words were exactly what you were thinking

you couldnt help it

while ur putting some of the books back in the middle of your shift

!!!! you see another book that u might like !!!

not to judge a book by its cover butttttttt

it looks like ur type oop-

and after flipping through it

to get an idea of font size and chapter length cause ur a whole nerd like that

u see it ALSO has pencil markings

in the borders and underlining sentences

and without even thinking u borrow it

just to read the funny comments again

and ur boss comes up to you during your shift and is like

‘have you seen someone’s been writing in the books? look at this’

and thrusts a book in ur face

and ur like ??????? okay chill I’ll look

and u read the writing she’s pointing at

the familiar loopy handwriting adorning the page

and it says ‘I hope she throws her drink in his face’

when u read the paragraph for context

u realise it’s a confession scene

a few lines down the mystery person has written ‘called it.’

and u can’t help but laugh

like come on that was funny

but ur boss doesn’t agree

she just asks you to find out who’s doing it so they can be suspended from the library

or charged with vandalism

or something

she wants vengeance

u roll ur eyes and go to one of the staff computers

scrolling through the lists of borrowers for that specific book

and it’s a fuckin library that book has been borrowed a loT

2031 times ???????????????

you almost fall of your chair tbh

then someone clears their throat in front of u

and u immediately apologise as u try and get the right tab up to process the borrower’s book

but once u look at the person in front of u

you wish you hadn’t been so nice

sicheng stands in front of you

a grin on his face as he hands you another book

smug bitch is so happy he startled u

‘looking at porn on the library computer, yn?’

u laugh

‘I’m not u in 8th grade’

he glares at you as he takes his book and goes back to his desk to continue studying

u were soooo hoping he’d leave

even tho u kinda enjoyed looking at him

like dude was hot okay

what were u supposed to do????

ur actual job????

please.

so he stays

and when it’s ten minutes til closing

u go and let everyone know

and u stop at sichengs table

and he’s writing out notes or something

idk it’s not like u care anyway lol

but he’s lowkey frustrated bc he keeps messing up this one goddamn formula

so he erases it

and that’s when u catch a glimpse of his handwriting

and bruh am I high or is that the exact same handwriting as in the books

I mean he has borrowed a few of the books

and he’s into that genre

not that you've checked out his borrowed list or anything

basically ur having this whole conversation with yourself in your head

bc ur cool like that

and he’s like ????? why this bitch standing over my shoulder and watching me write out this equation

until he’s like ‘what are u doing’

and ur like !!!!! oh hi !!! sorry I was busy listening to the voices in my head lmao xD

jk jk

‘have u been writing in the books’

and suddenly he’s super shy

and he has this massive grin

and he’s like ‘no’

bitch we know it was u stfu

u roll ur eyes and ur like ‘its not funny my boss wants you to be suspended’

he squints at you

‘how do you even know it was me’

and then:

‘DO YOU HAVE E V I D E N C E’

and u cross your arms

like a badass bitch

and ur like ‘I have plenty of evidence actually’

‘for one, youve borrowed all the books that have been found with writing’

‘and your handwriting matches’

subconsciously he covers his notebook with his arm to hide his handwriting

and he's like ‘why are u telling me this’

you're taken aback by the question tbh

like ?????? to be a good person ??????

idk u fuckwit just wanted to warn you

‘thought you'd want to know’

and he just turns back to his book

and you shrug and walk away like ok get suspended then see if I care

but u do :((

but as you walk away hes like

‘wait’

‘Im gonna be suspended??’

and u nod like ye that's what I just said but ok

‘like I cant borrow or I cant come in at all?’

u don't know tbh

‘both I think?’

and suddenly there's panic in his eyes

another person walks past u and thanks u

and u mindlessly tell them to have a good night as they leave

everyone has left

except sicheng of course

that beautiful son of a-

wait why did u say beautiful

‘what can I do to nOT get suspended??’

and u shrug bc idk dude not my problem

but then u think about it

‘I mean if u get rid of the evidence theres no way u can be suspended, right?’

and he seems so happy at the thought

‘would you help me? please?’

and ur sooooooo skeptical

‘depends. what do u want to me to do?’

‘I mean I need access to the books so’

‘yeah ill let u in and out’

‘I can't exactly just erase the markings when people could be watching’

and that's exactly how you end up sitting in the library with dong sicheng at 11pm at night rifling through books to find odd pencil markings to erase

it wasnt that hard

u just got his record up

*snorts* ‘you borrowed ‘how to talk to girls’ when we were thirteen’

and he just rolled his eyes and marched to the computer like ‘you can see my record I deserve to see yours’

and ur like NOOOOOO nononononono

but later

‘you've read all the light-fighter novels??’

he looks at you from where hes searching for one of the books on the list, an eyebrow raised

‘yeah why’

‘dude,, I loved those books’

and he smiles a little

‘thats where I started marking the books tbh, every time I read it id add a little cross in the corner of the cover bc I read it so often’

part of u is a little impressed

the other is annoyed at how similar your taste in books is

but the first part keeps asking why u hate him so much

other than the staying late and the snarky comments

which you actually find kinda funny-

anyways

once you've gathered up a few of the books

like at least ten each

you sit on the floor of the childrens section

beanbags sprawled out beneath you as u read through some of the books

most of them you've read before

and every time you giggle at something hes written his smile gets a little bigger

but of course youre looking at the book so you dont notice

and he keeps his head down

‘is it bad that im hungry’

you lift your head from the book to look at sicheng

hes not even reading anymore hes just lounging back on the beanbags

and maybe he'd been watching u read

watching as the smile on your face grew wider at his commentary

‘I didnt see you leave tonight. have u eaten?’

you furrow your brows in thought, trying to recall having seen him leave

‘you been watching me, y/n?’

‘have you been eating, sicheng?’

and there's something about the way you say his name that makes his heart jump

his voice is soft as he looks at you in the dark

‘no’

you focus back on the book in front of you

‘finish whatever book youre on and we’ll call it a night’

‘what, you wanna go eat?’

you cant tell if hes just surprised or if hes hopeful

or something else

‘no but I do want to sleep’

you laugh and he forces a laugh too

you dont notice the difference

when you've returned all the books

he meets you at the front door as you grab the book you'd been reading that shift

hes just standing by the door on his phone

and maybe its bc ur tired or maybe its just him

but u cant help thinking

Jesus Christ this boy is attractive

and okay maybe u had a crush on him a few years ago

but hey! you were eleven what could u do

the crush still lasted like two years tho lmao

but u shoulder your bag and open the door for him

making sure to lock it carefully

and he walks with you in the direction of your apartment

and ur like oh u live this way too?

and hes like nah

but what kind of boy would he be if he didnt accompany home

like christ y/n u could be h u r t out here at this time of night

but you just smile at him bc wow thats ??? actually ??? kinda sweet

‘who are u and what have u done with dong sicheng’

and there goes his heart again

he just nudges u with his elbow

and u laugh at him and continue on ur way

when u get to ur building he thanks u for ur help in the most polite way possible

and u can kind of see that hes actually rlly nice ??? how ???

but hes back at the library the next day

and of course he comes up to the counter as soon as he spots you

sneaking around a few desks so u dont hear him come up behind you to whisper ‘BOO!’ in your ear

you jump like three feet in the air and spin around to tell him to get out from behind the desk

‘I dont see a nametag on u that means u have to be on THAT side of the desk thank u very much’

‘didnt realise your name tag said bitch on it geeeez y/n ://’

and u just fix him with a glare once hes finally on the right side

‘are u borrowing a book or not’

‘nuP’

he leans on the desk

his eyes staring straight into yours

‘just wanted to ask if u were able to stay back tonight’

you roll ur eyes

you'd barely gotten any sleep last night

but the look of concern on his face when he realises youre hesitating makes you nod

‘of course,, wouldnt want my least favourite person to get kicked out’

‘I always knew you had a soft spot for me’

you roll ur eyes aGAiN

‘go bother someone else’

‘oh is the hot librarian in?’

you push him away from the desk

but he doesnt miss the faint smile on ur lips

‘sicheng dont make me give you $100 in overdue book fees’

he sticks his hands up at the threat, his eyes wide

‘no. please. ill do anything’

when u raise an eyebrow at him, he just grabs the book you'd been reading (and not yet borrowed) and walks away

and he winks too

u have to stop your heart from beating out of its chest

and later

its 8pm and the library is officially closing

and for the past three hours you'd been walking to sicheng’s desk and subtly been trying to steal your book back

but every single time hes seen you coming

and pulled the book under the desk or into his lap

away from your grabbing hands

every. single. time.

you tap your foot impatiently at him when its time to continue ur undercover project

and he smiles down at his notebook when he hears u huff in annoyance at him

he dramatically looks up at you

‘do you need something?!’

‘do you want to get suspended?!’

he narrows his eyes at you but stands up anyway

he carefully puts his things in his bag and takes the list of books from your hands

a few of them are already crossed out as having been checked and erased

but theres still a lot to go

it takes you almost three weeks to finally get to the last day

and it had been the same thing every time;

sicheng took forever to pack up

you'd eventually find about ten books each

sit in the children’s section

laugh and chat about your lives while you went through the books

tease each other

and when you'd finished,

he'd walk you home

every single time

without fail

it became a habit that on the Tuesdays he'd stop by on his way to his morning class to drop coffee off for you

because he'd kept you up the night before

and it became easy to lose track of time with sicheng

he was just so engaging

there was no part of you that felt bored or uncomfortable with him

yeah he was annoying and infuriating

but his good book taste made up for it

and his annotations in the margins of the books too

‘is this the last of them?’

he squints down at the page again, counting the books on the table again

its the third time hes counted

‘surely ive read more than this’

‘not from this library ://’

you blow your hair out from your face and look down at the pile

‘you know, I think my manager is starting to get really suspicious of me’

‘why’ he looks up briefly from his book to read your face

but you try and remain calm

‘well she only told me about the markings right. and now theyre disappearing’

he looks at you like ?????

‘well she knows ive been closing up late... I think she thinks I did it’

he laughs ‘you? has she met you?’

you pout and throw a pillow at him

‘HEY! what's that supposed to mean :((’

‘it means ive never met someone who's so protective over books as you’

you think about it, chewing ur bottom lip

‘lets just finish this’

‘do u want to get food after’

he surprises you with the sudden question

and the slight nervousness thats evident on his face really makes you want to say yes

but you have a class tomorrow

and you always try and finish up here earlier on a Thursday night

‘cant :((’

he nods and goes back to readng

theres silence for a while

but you find it comfortable

sicheng on the other hand, feels as though hes just been shot down

you just turned down his date

you've kinda noticed hes more reserved now

quiet

but rlly hes just kind of embarrassed

until u say something that gives him hope

‘I,, uh, I dont have plans tomorrow night’

and ngl boy is stunned

‘just if u wanted to go see a movie or something idk’

now its ur turn to be embarrassed

u hope ur hair is hiding ur face as u look back down at the book in ur lap bc no doubt ur blushing

but sicheng is just staring at you

and

before even saying anything

he leans over the gap between you

with all the books

and hovers in front of your face

ur so shocked and ur heart is beating way too hard and fast and ur breathing is too quick to be normal are you having an attack I dont know-

and then he leans forward a little bit more

and his lips meet yours

and suddenly its like a fireworks display went off inside you

and then its almost midnight on a Thursday night and ur sitting in the children's section of your workplace in the beanbags with sicheng cupping ur face and kissing you

he just really needed to kiss you

like more than he needed air

and when u finally pull back

he loves how breathless you are

how you have to fight to keep the smile off your face

how you stare at him with wide eyes

‘so its a date then?’

you blush even redder

and nod

‘ye its a date :))’

but for the next fifteen minutes you sit in stunned silence together

small smiles playing on your faces

until u look at your watch and ur like

‘shit sicheng I have to go’

and his eyes widen bc holy crap u were supposed to leave like half an hour ago

so u both sprint around the library trying to put all the books back

and he meets you at the door again after you've grabbed the keys and made sure everything that needed to be locked was,,, u know,, locked

and when ur walkign to the door again

hes on his phone

u cant see but hes texting his friends about what happened lmao what a softie

and when u walk out together

without thinking he grabs your hand

and u walk home

hand in hand

after midnight

he clears his throat

‘so uh,, when actually is our date’

‘my last class ends at 5-’

‘so 5 it is’

‘are u sure??’

he nods happily

and he presses a gentle kiss to ur forehead when u get to ur doorstep

‘ill see u tomorrow’

but the next day

when u come out of your last class

a little giddy

a little too excited

and see him leaning against one of the stone pillars

effortlessly handsome

you feel your heart flip

and maybe ur just tired or maybe its him

but hes really attractive

like really really attractive

its actually just that youre in love with him

he doesnt see you coming

too focused on something on his phone

but he definitely sees you when you push his hand out to the side and step onto ur toes to kiss him

and u can feel him smile a little as he kisses you back

‘ready for that date?’

‘yeah, where are we going’

‘so I was thinking we could go to the libra- HEY! dont hit me I was j o k i n g y/n jesus christ’

213 notes · View notes

kingvenevong-blog · 5 years

Text

Official sleep study for narcolepsy

this is probably a horrible way to introduce myself lol but I decided to start blogging about it lmao.

Anyways, after finally getting free community health insurance, my family was finally able to afford for me to go to the primary doctor for serious issues (i don’t work :/ ) which at first was awkward and a bit frustrating but she actually took me seriously and referred for my insurance to a pulmonary sleep doctor for sleep apnea and narcolepsy. Honestly, if I wasn’t fat she wouldn’t have bothered to measure my neck and care about sleep apnea, even if it was on the checklist they have you fill out. (Basically, if your neck is over 6 inches in circumference then you are most likely to have sleep apnea or if you weigh a lot) It was only an awkward visit because she speaks into her phone so it writes into the computer, and i tried talking about depression and she just points out a lot of image issues i had. Which is embarassing but I understand why. It was weird when she said “patient seems happy and easy going” like wow ok do i have to seem sad? cuz i can? its just its common courtesy and good manners whipped into me by my parents to seem polite and pleasant.

So I finally get my first sleep appointment and it was an awful experience because of how i sleep lol. So at first, i tried to recline the bed extremely high at the top because i like to keep my head elevated or else i get an extremely bad headache. Next, i tried putting a pillow under my knees for proper position so i have a good sleep during the study as you need 5 hours. Well that epically failed because the pillow was so airy and puffy i couldn’t sleep comfortably lol. So the whole night i just kept changing positions as i always do but more than usual because i was not comfy. i eventually just got rid of that posture pillow idea lol and when i reclined the bed with the pillow under me there was no more room at the bottom lmao i was like bruh wtf this is difficult. So my sleep tech kept coming in my room at night because my finger sensor kept coming off, as i like to sleep with my arm under the pillow or against my face lol. And it was awful everytime she came in because of the blaring light from the main room. It hurt so bad lol, gave me a bad headache, had my eyes flashing and burning, all because this damn finger sensor wouldn’t stay on and work. It was also extremely hard to sleep with all the wires because the wires are short so you can only sleep on one side of the bed although it is a full-size bed. or else the wire or pad would come off. a few times a night she had to reapply some pads cuz they wouldn’t stick on my skin and kept falling off probably because i was moving too much. then in the morning my mom picks me up and gets me donut from the old bakery we used to own so that was nice and i got some apple juice (i love apple juice) and then after that i slept a lot more at home because i’m a piece of shit lmao.

So a few months after that i get a follow up appointment and they showed me my brain scans and breathing and everything they conducted. it was hilarious because it showed that i kept moving and kept sleeping on and off constantly. But it also made so much sense because i did feel it and was fascinating to actually see when i was awake and wasn’t becuase its so hard to telll when i’m sleeping or awake at night and i constantly get up to go to the bathroom so everything is a horrible haze. The doc then said around 5am my body finally just gave up and went into rem sleep which makes sense cuz thats when i usually feel a deep sleep before i get wide awake for a few hours.

So in this picture is my second sleep study. The first one was to test for sleep apnea, which oddly luckily i don’t have? even though sometimes i wake up choking in my sleep and gasping for air. In my 2nd sleep study its all the same wires but somewhat felt more for some reason. and i did sleep good. 6 hours actually. way better than last time. of course its still on and off but i slept decent. and my sleep tech actually visited me more often than last time cuz the pads kept coming off and i stayed way more still and closer this time. i mean my finger sensor didn’t come off cuz she told me where its supposed to be and tied something around it lmao. next morning the AM sleep tech said she used a whole tub of paste cuz it kept coming off lmaoooo. we don’t know why but it was porbably because it was sticking to my heair instead but i think its cuz i was sweating so much. they even turn the fan on. which was soooo nice. i wish that happened everynight. where i get too hot and want a fan on lol. anyways narcolepsy sleep studies go over into the next day. my pm sleep tech said i would leave around 3 or 4pm. how it works is that they make you sleep 20 mins for every 2 hours. They check how fast you fall asleep. So i did just that and i kept dozing off the first 2 hours, and finally slept so fast for the 20 mins and woke up on time when he went to wake me up lol. then i had to wait the other 2 hours but i kept dozing off. eventually an hour in my sleep tech said that the doctor had enough data for me to leave. which was awesome because idk how longer i could do that i felt horrible haha. then had my mom pick me up and she got us some dutch but i barely drank mine to let it cool down and she just threw all of it away :(

so now i am waiting for my final results and i hope to finally get treatment for narcolepsy lol.

5 notes · View notes

dead-thorin · 5 years

Text

everything im gonna write is gonna be concerning but it be like that and its really not concerning

for like months now i haven’t been ok. And like it’s gotten worse with the holidays and ive been so fucking angry and tired lol. like at first i was like its fine its ok, then i was like its the hormones it happens, then its the stress of finals and work but like its really not like i legit just dont want to be alive anymore im really tired of it. Like idk how to convey just how much i dont care anymore to be alive

1) I feel so fucking isolated here like i have friends but a majority of them are cis. And like the trans people i know? most of them on T are non binary which like valid, but they dont get the full extent. And like their families support them lmao and theres one person i could talk to but he doesnt seem to want to socialize much so i always feel awful thinking about hitting him up

and like i feel like my friends dont like me and i know thats not the case but also maybe it is!!! who fucking knows anymore!!!! i dont have time to talk to them bc im so busy at work and then i get home and immediately have to do more work and by the time im free this week theyll be home for break so like!!! fuck i guess!!! i saw one of my friends who i havent been able to see all semester and she said shed hit me up today and she hasnt and i know its cause she and another friend have to study and theyve been busy but in my mind its still “she fucking hates u!!! doesnt matter that she was so excited to see u and would definitely have no qualms in telling u to fuck off she hates u!!!”

2) no one listens to me lol like people listen to me when i rant, which is really helpful and i really appreciate and love that they do that bc emotional labor, but like in groups? i talk and people interrupt or dont hear what i say or disregard it and im like k. OR THEY THINK IM FUCKING JOKING LIKE THIS LEGIT IS SUCH A PROBLEM AND IVE HAD IT HAPPEN WITH SEVERAL PPL AND IDK WHAT TO DO. Like i physically say “im really not joking dont do that” AND THEY STILL THINK IM JOKING

and whenever i talk to people and they give me advice or just listen they do at least one thing. They either mention medicine, which again, valid, but i dont want to go back on medicine right now. But then they fucking push that shit and demand reasons why i dont want to like fuck u i dont have to explain shit to u i just dont want to. And/or it turns into me educating them and im just like great! i managed to do labor in this trying time! nice!

3) I cant talk to my therapist bc shell become concerned lol. i told her how i went to the labor looking for a book about the pros and cons of committing suicide and researched it and i had to talk for 10 minutes afterwards about the steps i was taking to help combat it but like i was legit scared to tell her in case she made me go into inpatient care lmao and this brings me to pt 4

4) theres like nothing here LMAOOOOOOO like no books at either library about stopping suicidal thoughts or helping depression or about family estrangement. I had to order books from different libraries to get something and theres a few that i got from the Libby app but like wtf lmao and theres no events during christmas and every volunteer thing? either i gotta fill out an application and do training which who knows how long thatll take or i need a car. Like there legit isnt anything here i did so much looking lmao like i have my hobbies but that wont make me leave the house

i talked to a professor about this shit too and he understands and stuff and told me to hit him up during break if i feel isolated but like I FEEL SO FUCKING GUILTY FOR EVEN BREATHING LMAO LIKE WHAT hes got shit to do too and i know he has research going on so like doubt it

5) im gonna die alone at this pt and i know thats mad dramatic and also probably false but im like so conflicted about everything i feel with my gender and dating

like every time i like a man im like wow if i was a girl, this wouldnt be a problem and like being cis has more privileges than being trans but i know last time i dated in the closet it wasnt a good time SO

and every time i like a girl, im like she prob wont see me as a man or will be disappointed in my body or transition

and like no matter who im interested in, the same thought is always “they prob dont see me as a man and will misgender me, even unintentionally” like i know people who dont even know my birth name and have known my pronouns as he/him AND THEY STILL GET IT WRONG LIKE WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO EVEN DO ANYMORE TATTOO IT ON MY FUCKING FOREHEAD

theres a guy i currently like, whos so sweet like theres one incident that happened that i had me thinking damn.... hope hes into guys and single..... and like its kept me up thinking “oh man hes definitely str8 this fucking sucks if i was a girl i would probably have a shot” but like every time i toy with the idea of detransitioning (not in a serious way, but just like casually thinking of a scenario) my mind physically rejects it and is like “motherfucking do u wanna go back to THOSE shitty feelings??? really??? it was worse before!!” and i will definitely get over this crush, like im just lonely and its cuffing season, but it fucking sucks in the meantime like i feel like i cant date because im too nervous and scared to!!! im so scared they wont think im a man and i know thats not every person but like Jesus its enough that its a good possibility

6) this part is sad but i think i have to stop talking to my sister or at least give her limited info bc shes having her parents contact me through her and im not giving them shit so...

like she just texted asking when id be home and for the millionth time (BC NO ONE LISTENS TO ME) i said i wasnt going home, im never going home, stop asking and i know that its them asking her to ask me and they can honestly fuck themselves

like these are all problems that have solutions and i know the solutions but like im so tired of it lol im tired of having to deal with my family situation, im tired of being ignored and interrupted and not taken serious and having to explain my boundaries over and over and over again, im tired of not being able to talk to people for fear of getting hospitalized or interrupted or pushed onto meds, im tired of not having resources, im so tired of it all. Im so sick of being suicidal and not even being able to get out of bed and having to deal with being depressed and anxious and chronically ill fuck all of it

legitimately had to make a list of shit i could do over break so that i feel like i cant hurt myself until i finish it bc thats how my shit brain works. like i dont want to die but i also just dont want to deal with this anymore and i know itll get better in time but jesus fucking christ its been 8 damn years when does it actually get fully fucking good? its gotten better but more shit keeps coming up like yea i started hormones but now i dont have a fucking family anymore.

Even if i didnt have this list i wouldnt do it bc 1) i dont want to do that to my closest friend and 2) im helping someone get out of an abusive situation. She has like no support, just one cousin whos there for her, but he doesnt have resources for her. Ive been listening to her and validating her and making sure she knows that a) this is the type of shit abusers do and b) shes not fucking crazy for thinking certain things!!! she really isnt and i get it so much so ive been gently giving her contacts from the beginning to help her and she finally left and is in a really delicate place. So like not exactly the best thing for me to suddenly be gone and id feel terrible if she had no one there for her

anyway this was a long post that can basically be summed up as i really want to fucking kill myself but i wont but also im suffering a lot

#post from the blogger

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hellsbellschime · 6 years

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“You are still one of us, a Mikaelson. You always will be.” says the fake Rebekah. At this point no one is a real Mikaelson in that freak show. We have entered a parallel fanfiction universe and it is not even the good kind of fanfiction. This show could not be any more unoriginal could it?

They keep calling Hayley queen in every second dialogue and in such a dramatic way and I keep laughing so much. Was this seriously the way of the show to make people accept Hayley’s importance? Because oh dear LMAO…and the actress surely does not help…like at all.

Klaus stands on the balcony and smirks like Machiavelli and acts like the master puppeteer and then what? What was his master plan? To kill Jackson? And then does nothing? Just invites Jackson and Hayley to live in the compound? So what’s the point? Like there is no point. Seriously. There is no point. Like…none. It is not just a let down. It is practically nothing. How can this even be possible. All that hype for nothing. All those scenes and a whole episode and all the preparation for nothing.

I don’t know what to say. This show challenges my critical skills and makes me think I may be missing something or my comprehension skills do not work because this makes no sense and shows normally do make sense even if they are trash shows. At least there is a point and usually you get from point A to point B. This is not the case here. Like they just bring the baby back? THAT’S IT? I sat through all that crap for them to erase everything? Where’s the logic in that? -

- So what was the point of S1? Of the finale of S1? Of this season so far? Of frigging killing Ansel? Of all that drama? All that drivel! Why sent the baby away to begin with? What the actual hell is going on? I have never seen a narrative like this. I am speechless. There is no progress. More than half of S2 has passed and we are at square one as we were at the same point of S1 and it is square where nothing actually happens and it serves no purpose. How is this even possible?

That’s one ugly wedding dress. And poor Phoebe can’t even hold the umbrella and hops up and down in such an awkward way. She can’t even spell the words right. Always with the wooves and in her talk with Jackson for their wedding night she can’t spell the word Hybrid. She says hybird like actually hi and bird. It’s so distracting. She's portraying a hybrid and can’t even spell the word. Same with werewolves and wolves. She can’t even speak and deliver the basic words of her character. I’m amazed.

Not only they have another actor playing Kol and have him saying crap about how he did not like being a vampire but they also progressively turned him to a fairytale prince. I am gonna vomit. At this point and I do not believe I am about to say this it would have been better if they had kept him dead and away from TO.

Happy mom, happy dad, happy baby. Developmental psych? Seriously? LMFAO. Yeah it truly takes a lot of studying and attending a lot of courses in several complicated studies to get to learn that. Who would have thought! You definitely need a therapist for that. I mean…come oooooooon LOL…Cami darling…go out, get some air, eat something. Maybe it will help LOL

Kol dies and Elijah does not shed a tear. Hayley marries and he cries. I have no words. I mean yeah this was fake Kol and this show has no real ties with the Originals but still…like at least keep up the pretenses! This is a mess. I am offending messes here but I can’t find a suitable description for what I am seeing.

Freya is just so melodramatic. It is the role and the dialogue too but also the over the top acting from the actress. Everything in this show is just so hammy.

I am in awe about how offensive this show is. So Rebekah hijacks Eva's body but somehow Rebekah is the victim and Eva is the villain? No matter what Eva has done this is absolutely disgusting. As if Rebekah is not an 1000 year old monster either but even if she wasn't she is possessing another woman's body and the show is trying to justify this because conveniently Eva is evil? Same for Kaleb and Davina. Do these people have the slightest inkling of how aggressively offensive they are?

LMAO I am pretty sure that when witches give vampire aneurysms it is not meant for the actor to act as if they are chocking and more so so ridiculously as Hayley does. Bless her! PT is truly the gift that never stops giving LOL

"If she comes after Hope Rebekah or no Rebekah I will put her down for good" said the swamp Queen. Yay for gratitude. Nice to see that once an asshole always an asshole. At least that's a constant. And everyone is always yammering about that baby and I can't bring myself to care no matter how much I try.

LMAO So Freya kills Esther by turning her into a flock of birds? haha you know when you stop having any expectations from this show and view it for what it is (a trash parody) then weirdly enough it can become quite entertaining LOL

Actually if I am not mistaken the protection spell Sabine had used in TO against dying which could only be used once was something Bonnie also used in TVD in episode 2x18 when she faked her death when she fought Klaus in Alaric's body. They hadn't gone in great detail about it back then but it was essentially the same.

Oh you’re getting towards the end of season 2, just brace yourself because it really kind of gains terrible momentum leading up to the finale. And yeah, the wedding episode was a mess and you’re completely right, they have not moved the situation ahead at all, they’re actually really great at doing something and then immediately negating it afterwards. I actually forgot about the Esther flock of birds thing though and that was hysterical, I remember asking myself WTF was supposed to have just happened because I don’t know what exploding into a flock of birds is supposed to signify.

#the originals for ts #long post #to redux #Anonymous

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shytiff · 4 years

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Small Oct Wins

1 - DL, its bts week on fallon 🥰🥰also chuseok, which means content >>>, cicil dk ikk, rapat sponsor and talked and raged with regen abt mpi and manhwa lmao, group call shiko

2 - DL, finished 4 dk ikk wow!!, read dear door sampe ujung

3 - DL, symptoms ipd WHILE trying to losten to resus cairan fkdigital and i failed to listen to fkdigital lmao in the beginning they talked abt different fluids, my kompre is in Nov!! Can take a slight breath of air. Cicil kompre

4 - DL, symptoms, ordered krispy face (tasted so so), started reading sign, its so hilarious but the antagonist just doesnt make sense. too dysfunctional

5 - DL, ea simulation (got cushing syndrome, yay us for rosc!), forgot my scrub pants so i borrowed from indah, the way back homd (PP motor) was hooot, cicil banifidi, talked with ara for 1,5 hrs abt mental health and past traumas lmaoo

6 - DL, cicil geri, read raise ga wa tanin ii

7 - formatif geri, originally meant to go to puri with atikah to get seirockya, but its closed. So we walked to lippo, got genki sushi takeaway, walked to carrefour where we parked, and on the way back atikah had this sudden idea of eating @ taman 45. So we did. We reminisced old memories while eating rice bowls and sushi at park. Sounded pretty great except its taman 45 lmaoooo. Took a nap at atikahs place and then i went back. Tried matcha cookie by Chips Chat Lexley, its too crumbly :(( the taste was so so

8 - was sooo drained i dunno why. Slept and lazed around until 11-ish after i managed to shower and eat. Rip stamina. DL. Formatif with stella manda, dr asti and dr fuady. Digorenggg. the dark chocolate cookie tasted quite good. Finally a cookie that did not fail

9 - helped ical and ara for simul kompre, e, DL, played among us with candra and solid, paused the game to do formatif ea lmao. i need to studyy aaa

10 - DL, my body felt tooo drained from 1 (one) exercise lol. Symptoms. Ordered mujigae and janjiw caramel latte 1L because 10 10 promo. lazed all afternoon. planned to run because it’s cloudy but wacana is life. Watched MOTS On:E with racheel. Gladi resik nemo. Saw hakken cosplay’s IG live. among us. i was an impostor with cibe (participant: 10) and i somehow won lmaoo. edited 2 pld article so i finally caught up! just need to wait some more articles from reporter

11 - DL, symptoms, wasted my time rereading vampire knight for the n-th time

12 - DL, QA KMKP, read banifidi while drinking janjiw caramel latte and on god coffee rly helps me to focus and not get sleepy, talked with ara abt her session with dr jiemi (emotion vs cognition)

13 - DL, there’s no class today uye, drank caramel latte janjiw at 11am and yall i somehow became productive. finished reading banifidi, 2Padi.

14 - Became captain at simul today, kasus HPP, i forgot to put O2 wtf :((((, bought 2 1-L package from sbux dm after school, and with +15k you get green tea frappe so i sat there for a bit for DT, felt a bit better (like im a normal functioning person???? like i dont feel sluggish). cicil IKK, passed lvl 4 DL

15 - DL, nemo as 2nd operator, vanilla latte nyom, thats all folks unfortunately

16 - DL, theres no schedule today, woke up at 10 am, vanilla latte and cicil PT, cicil IKK (only did a bit today), among us and i was the impostor 4 times lmaoo

17 - symptoms, in the soop 7, e, read on/off its too hilarious!! Finished 1 sitasi kompre

18 - last in the soop ep :(, e, DL, tugas kasus harian geri

19 - DL, the table i bought has arrived!, cicil IKK, joined ukmppd course, started at 18:30, its now 22:36, still 14 questions to go...

20 - DL, qa discussion with group, bought some plastic shoe boxes online, its cheap and it is great, bcs my shoes used to sit there in plastic bags, organized some stuff in my room for a bit!! my metal rack looks less messy yay. dk ikk, les

21 - Started my day early (finished shower by 7:30), DL, finished 1 ltm ikk and 1 sitasi PT, JK went live in youtube with his long hair and undercut, and literally afterwards YG came on vlive playing guitar. Its a good day indeed :”) its cloudy today, just a perfect shared to listen to youtube’s lofi study playlist. Barely paid attention in today's les, i rly need to reread the forensic one

22 - DL, formatted qa docx, looong qa zoom, read the dops form, tidied up my stuff for tomorrow and while waiting for les the dumbass me didnt realize that the mic is on and i muttered "masker n95..." lmaoooo. Paid attention in les. Took a shower while leaving the zoom (q&a sesh) and turns out its finished at 22:45. Yalll the tutors dedication though

23 - simul, waited around a bit, bought halo bowl from grab since im at school all day, tried chicken pesto. made me feel full, tasted like a typical "healthy food", not too oily. OK in the afternoon, did not get dops (not surprised), was today years old when i found out you can park motorbike beside gedung putih. Went home while listening to kuliah guru besar. Passed out in the 2nd part of les (bedah). That adds more of my course debt lmao

24 - Im trying out habitica now so DL documentations will be moved theree, trying to add the habit of reading quran. watched in the soop behind and dalbang, watched the social dilemma halfway (message: careful of being the social media’s product), ate nayam, slept again and woke up at 5 pm, made status anes, les (the freshest ive been so far. maybe because its saturday night, there’s only about 25+ participating until the end from the usual 50+)

25 - woke up early and showered, slept again, ate breakfast at 12 pm with banana and 2 brownies i need sugaar, reviewed forensics (les), made half of ltm ikk wow im kind of proud, submitted asinkronus, eval nemo

26 - icu and simul, the way back home was pleasantly cloudy, slept and woke for les, read anti PT and oh my assisant since i cant sleep during the night

27 - did ikk ppt, read TO SOLID answers (i got 65 and i feel sooo stupid, but the grade somehow changed to 66 which means pass), slepttt during the afternoon, dk ikk was pending bcs dr Indri was still doing surgery at 18:00. Les

28 - Felt like doing nothing. Watched the latest dalbang, PT briefing, dk ikk, les. Thats it omgggg my time keeps flying away

29 - Started my day early (6:30am) since i slept all the time :):):)), finished 1 ltm ikk, tried truffle belly, the nanban one. good enough and the rice is not too much which is nice. i dont rly know how the truffle oil’s supposed to smell (ive tried tubo before but i still have no idea). chose wahana choice for MPI (bismillah!!), finished reviewing TO SOLID 1, les

30 - it took me a whole day to read 1 (one) sitasi PT but im still proud nonetheless, how did time flyyyy tf. You’d think that this 5 day “holiday” i would learn a lot for kompre (haven’t started) and quickly checked off my to do list. for les i pulled the table near my bed so i was half listening half reading Private Lesson while laying down lmao

31 - checked 2 acads to do (i feel like when i do things in advance there will be stuff that make me go "ah tau gt nanti aja"), bingeing romee strijd's YouTube and its miracle i dont feel like shit after watching it (they literally go do amsterdam from sg to put their bags and then theyll go to miami?!), afternoon nap coz i cqnt bring myself to study kompre, cicil kompre bismillah.docx, last day of les (im not strong enough to follow until the end, bailed halfway), read a bit of blood link lmao, WTF ITS NOV 15 MINS FROM NOW :((( (writing this after sheetmasking, its 23:42) still not prepared for ukmppd kompre God Help Me

And thats it for Oct! I feel like there were some terrible mood phases, some ok ones, and those rare days when im up and about and refreshed and feel like doing things (most days im a sloth). Hope to do (and feel) better in Nov

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wannaonestars · 7 years

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the little mermaid au! ong seongwoo

the following scenario is based on the traditional storyline. please keep note that there are many different versions of the story, and not just the disney one.

ok so you’re the mermaid/merman (your preference) who adores humans bc like it’s so cool they have legs?? the idea of having legs and being on land just FASCINATES you and you’re sneaking around the shores to watch humans

and one day you’re just swimming on the surface and saying hi to the cute seagulls when you notice the sky turning dark and the clouds getting shady so like it was basically time to go

but just then you notice a ship floating like nowhere cLOSE to the shore

even though mermaids were always called a myth and you’d get chewed out if anyone saw ur tail you’re like…I need to save them >:((

and so you swim over to save the poor souls when suddenly rain just started POURING and the winds picked up out of nowhere and then you saw a body fall into the sea

you’re like oh shIT and suddenly accelerated in water to save the poor soul

you eventually find him and you get rly alarmed bc he isn’t struggling or anything he’s just kinda lifelessly sinking

you grab him and basically turn into an underwater jet bc you’d never swam so fast no not even when your mermaid mom told you dinner was ready

getting him to shore was so difficult because 1) the human was heavy and 2) you had no legs so you had to crawl to get far enough onto land

the dude (seongwoo if y’all didn’t realize yet) still wasn’t moving and you were panicking like??? he shouldn’t be dead yet

you do the mermaid version of cpr which was to….press your lips against his to suck all the seawater out of him

a minute later you start getting dizzy because you’re getting too dry so you had to crawl back into the sea…and you proceed to go back home but you just…couldn’t get that man out of your head….

meanwhile a princess from a different country visiting seongwoo’s found him collapsed on the beach and shook him awake and seongwoo’s like…what happened??

let’s call the princess rika like that snake from mystic messenger

anywaYS

rika told him that she “”saved”” him from drowning and he’s like…oh and that’s what she ends up telling the his father aka the KING and rumors spread around the palace like crazy like everyone was like damn they probably gonna get married now

meanwhile on yOUR END you were swimming towards the sea witch’s domain to ask for a pair of legs because after being on land and feeling the frustrations of being unable to stay for too long you REALLY wanted to become a human

the sea witch asks for your voice in exchange which was…a huge price

your singing is like the only thing that anyone’s ever praised you for so giving it up would be the same as tossing away half of your identity but…u know what, in the human world no one’s gonna know u anyway

so she casts a spell and gives you the legs u wanted and then shoots u out of the sea

after you get to shore and struggle to get the hang of walking for like 7 hours you pick up some rags to cover yourself bc that stupid witch didn’t give u any clothes

you just want to explore the village and ur getting looks bc wtf ur wearing some dirty rags with sand all over and wobbling like jello but u don’t rly care

suddenly you find a boy aka sEONGWOO in a quiet part of the area just…dancing and you were like!!! oh my gOD that’s amazing how can his legs and arms move like that…

and without thinking you start…singing a melody to go along with his movements and seongwoo snaps his head around and is like??? holy moly what but a split second later he breaks out into this wide grin and just keeps dancing and going along to your wordless song with a contemporary style

you’re a little weirded out urself bc weren’t u supposed to lose your voice??

the witch from her chamber: SHIT I FUCKED THE SPELL UP

anyways ur like lol whatever my win and when u end your song seongwoo approaches you and is like…hey, who are you?

let’s pause for a second and imagine seongwoo with a long sleeved white collared shirt with the first few buttons not buttoned and like windswept black hair

anyways ur like holy triton he’s hot and you tell him your name and he starts questioning where u live and stuff and why you’re dressed like this and when you’re unable to give him a proper answer he’s like…hey do you wanna come with me? bc he figures that you might be an abandoned child

he smiles that prINCELY smile of his and says “you sing really well. i’d love to have a performance with you again.”

and then he calls his horse over to give you a ride back to the palace

listen…if u thought seongwoo driving a car was good pls imagine prince seongwoo riding a horse

when you guys get to the palace rika dASHES towards seongwoo and swallows him into a hug and you’re both like?????

rika: bABE!!! father agreed to our marriage!!!!!!!!!

seongwoo: what

rika: it’s in two months!!!!!!!!!

seongwoo: wHAT

he’s so confused because his father literally nEVER discussed this with him and then a few seconds later when he finally understood the situation he immediately pushes rika off and sprints to his father’s study to argue

seongwoo: father?? why am I suddenly hearing news of marriage????

father: well, she did save you from drowning

seongwoo: I doubt it wtf her clothes weren’t even WET…like the most she could’ve done was shake me awake dad

father: ridiculous. I believe her claims like i’ve known her for three dayS seongwoo that’s enough for me to be able to tell that she’s an angel >:0. you’re already a young adult my son you need to find a partner soon so unless you can find a better option than rika then this marriage is gonna continue.

ten minutes later seongwoo comes out upset and annoyed and without saying anything else he just leaves for his room

you follow him bc like :((( poor bab. his door wasn’t locked so you just enter and ask if he’s okay

seongwoo smiles a little and just says “yeah…” but you knew he wasn’t

you: hey…it’s okay to talk to me about it

and tbh??? you’re literally the first person who’s ever shown any hint of genuine care for him without any motives…all seongwoo remembered from his childhood was getting spoiled silly because no one dared to get on the king’s bad side

and he tells you how he’s frustrated with all these decisions getting made for him and that he has absolutely no interest in an arranged marriage with someone who he doesn’t even know and for a whole half of hour he kinda just spills to you his entire childhood and the little things that he had been annoyed with but never had anyone to tell

and then he just exhales bc like that was sO much that he just dumped on you…and this is the point in which seongwoo unconsciously develops a special bond with you

and then he lets out a little laugh and ruffles your hair and is like lol sorry…let’s get you some decent clothes to try on ok? and he calls some maids over to get ur shit together

while changing into these weird (BUT EXTREMELY PRETTY) new clothes you realize that he was the boy you saved…but who would believe you?? you couldn’t be like hey guess what i’m the mermaid who saved u but i became a human last night

like the ppl here seem stupid but not that stupid

when you meet seongwoo again at the balcony with your combed hair and pretty clothes seongwoo was like oh my god…..they look gorgeous

he didnt say that tho like this is still ong mcongity the ongth ongster seongwoo

so he just winks and said “you’re gorgeous but….well, now ur next to me buddy ;)”

you shove him a lil and he laughs and then he asks u if you could sing for him again

and he just dances to your music all night long with an expression of pure bliss and at some point he grabs your hands and makes you dance with him hehe

cue ur dumb mermaid butt falling and tripping like 99 times but seongwoo enjoys it so much that he just laughs and pretends to fall with you

the next few days is just you and seongwoo singing and dancing like whenever y'all pass by each other in the hallways he makes the uGLIEST expression and just moves his arms and legs like an octopus and that always makes you giggle so hard bc that actually reminds u of ur octopus friends fredrick and joseph back at sea

he didn’t give a flying flick about wedding preparations and always avoided talking about it by grabbing you and fleeing to the town square to perform in front of whoever wanted to watch

rika always got livid whenever she hears that both the prince and u disappeared and would stay up as late as she could to “talk about it with her future husband” but u know what seongwoo doesn’t give a flying flick about her either so it’s just “yeah yeah” before he leaves again

you two get so much recognition and love from the townspeople they’re adore the performances so much and just get drawn to y’all like they’re in a trance

it’s so much fun!! some people even joke that u two are perfect for each other lmao

seongwoo: folds his ears to hide the blushing red tips

and then it gets to the point where!!! the king!!!!! asks you two to perform for the visiting countries!!!!!!!!!

it’s such an honor but honestly you feel so pressured bc like what if your voice cracks???? but seongwoo notices your nervousness quickly and so he walks over and grabs your hands and squeezes them and just says

“i believe in you.”

and your heart just MELTS bc…seongwoo had the softest and most gentle look on his face when he said that

“i really, truly, absolutely, definitely, totally—”

“stop,,,,right there,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,” like dammit seongwoo DONT RUIN THE MOMENT

and then he takes your hand in a much more elegant manner and leads you onto the dance floor…where the two of you perform with every fiber of your being

once your song and his dance and the thunderous applause ends seongwoo turns to you with this grin that stretches across from one end of his face to the other and u rly can’t resist smiling back as widely as he is

a short while later you two are at the balcony again laughing about stuff when suddenly seongwoo goes “you know…I really wish that this could go on forever…like, just you and i dancing and singing together until my bones break”

you don’t know what to say to that bc his expression is so serious like he doesn’t look like the usual joking dude who eats ur slice of pizza when ur not looking

and suddenly u feel seongwoo leaning closer to you….like his face is INCHES away from yours and u can feel his breath on your skin…….

“if you agree to it…i can ask my father to stop the wedding so that….you and i can be together instead…”

you’re like sweating right now bc??? what is he saying???? and for a few seconds you can’t tell whether that loud thumping sound was coming from your chest or his

“you’re the first person who i’ve been able to confide in and talk to…I don’t care what your background is, I—actually, what am I saying haha this is embarrassing, never mind—”

“yes”

his eyes pop wide open and he’s like??? what?????

you make this embarrassed lil smile and just go,,, “i’m willing to spend the rest of my life with you, ong seongwoo.”

seongwoo’s entire body just flares up and this burst of joy EXPLODES within him and he’s absolutely unable to contain it so he suddenly pulls you into a bear hug and spins you around and around

and he’s laughing like…after over twenty years of being treated like a he could never be a normal person and enduring the fake kindness being thrown at him for self benefit he finally found happiness and it’s honestly the BEST feeling that he’s ever experienced

and you’re laughing while in his arms but the you suddenly say “"hey…but what if i’m a mermaid?”

he almost drops u like wHAT

but then a second later his wits take over bc hey he’s ong mcongity the ongth ongster seongwoo

and he makes this playful grin and is like “it was my childhood dream to marry a mermaid”

this is probs gonna be like the longest scenario I ever write… anyways, thank for reading this far LOL I hope you liked it!! this is probably 100 times more cliche and stupid than it already was in my head but lmfao i’ve always kinda wanted to put twists in original fairy tales. maybe i’ll do this for other members? idk, we’ll see how much inspiration I can get ٩( ᐛ )و

#ong seongwoo #ong seongwoo scenarios #wanna one #wanna one seongwoo #wanna one imagines #ong seongwoo imagines #produce 101 season 2 #produce 101 seongwoo #produce 101 scenarios #pd101s2 #produce 101 imagines #wanna one scenarios

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mmakehappy · 6 years

Text

2017

1. What did you do in 2017 that you’d never done before? i’ll try to do this chronologically again: so at the beginning of january one of my best friends left to study abroad in rome which was sad and i missed her a lot. i saw rory scovel do stand up. i took an animation class which was fun for the first few weeks until i failed it lmao. actually my classes from jan to march did not go so well tbh but whatever i made it through. my sister came to visit me the weekend before st paddys day which was super fun and then we saw panic which was soooooooo fuckin rad i love them still wow! i went home for spring break and visited a local winery w my dad which was a lot of fun and then a week later uhhh me and @carrot-gallery became gfs!!! and my whole frickin life changed bc i love her so much wow!! but then a week after that i turned 22 and spent my birthday alone! which i tried to pretend didnt make me sad but by the end of the day i was very sad about it and thats when my sweet gf called me to sing happy birthday and i sobbed on my couch and ill never forget that!!! so okay then spring quarter classes started and i was a part of depaul’s visiting artist series which was super cool... i met a lot of new awesome people (both at depaul and the industry ppl that were our guests!) and made some great friends in that class! i was a house manager and camera op which was super fun. i went to a screening of my fave professor’s short film which was also rad. i saw a ghost story at the chicago critics film festival, which was amazing. i saw idiocracy in 35mm and then mike judge did a q&a! the very next day i was house manager for depaul’s student film festival at the music box! i saw chris gethard do a live recording of beautiful/anonymous and then also do some standup, that was awesome. i saw day wave live!!! amazing! i spent an entire dystopian day dealing with megabus. that was hell! i sat at an outdoor amphitheater and even tho i couldnt really see him i got to listen to seu jorge sing david bowie covers and life was magical for a few hours. my sisters came up to visit me and we saw aladdin the musical and had our minds blown, it was soooo fun! i went to the chicago pride parade for the very first time but i went by myself and at one point i was sitting on the curb just crying! not a high point but still memorable. i won a ticket to an advanced screening of the big sick where kumail & emily were there to do a q&a after the movie.... had a fuckin blast OBVIOUSLY and then saw the movie 9 other times in various theatres. i also made it into a commercial FOR the movie i just loved it that much lmao! i moved into a new (and my current) apartment! lorde released melodrama and fucking murdered me in my own home. otherwise i had a pretty uneventful but anxiety filled summer bc of financial aid stuff so that really sucked. i saw good time w taylor and the safdie brothers were there to do a q&a and they were such interesting guys i could listen to them talk for hours honestly. my mom and sisters came up to visit me and we took our mom to her very first cubs game which was sooo so much fun and they won that day too!! it was awesome and we had a great time :) watched the eclipse (or tried to anyway!!) fall quarter classes started and i honestly kicked ass at them, i got on the deans list (i almost typed honor roll lmao i mean its basically the same) i hung out with ari again which was cool!! we went to the aquarium! me and taylor saw beach fossils which was honestly the most buckwild concert ive ever been to i think, it was good shit. i got jobs at AMC (which i have since quit lmao) and starbucks and left my job at the paint place which was bittersweet! me and taylor saw mbmbam live!!! so fun!! and we watched trolls that night and goofed on it so hard!! i went home for thanksgiving and found out my big sister is gonna have a baby this year!! :D i saw mike birbiglia do stand up! which was soooo incredible of course (except i felt bad bc my mom was supposed to come w me but she couldnt go! so i brought taylor lol) UMMMMM MY DAM GIRLFRIEND CAME TO CHICAGO TO VISIT ME AND STAYED FOR A WHOLE DANG WEEK AND IT WAS THE BEST THING EVER SHE MAKES ME SO HAPPY WE HAD SO MUCH FUN AND I MISS HAVING HER RIGHT NEXT TO ME EVERY SINGLE GOSH DANG DAY <3 ;_____; and that was my year!!

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? last year i said id like to read at least one book each month and watch at least 100 movies - i did neither! im keeping the movie resolution though bc cmon 100 movies should be EASY for a film major wtf am i doing!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? no but it will happen in 2018!

4. Did anyone close to you die? not a person but we had to put down my sweet doggo, flash :(

5. What countries did you visit? still none :/

6. What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017? More confidence that I actually deserve to be in college and that I can do this shit and I’m awesome <– that was my answer from last year and the year before but yeah. same. also money.

7. What dates from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? ummm march 25 when me and gf became gfs and also dec 17 when she came to visit :)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? putting myself out there by doing VAS/Premiere, getting on the deans list for the first time since freshman year and then also getting a new job

9. What was your biggest failure? this summer i didnt do shit besides wallow and cry and it sucked!

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? nope

11. What was the best thing you bought? every movie ticket and the bras i bought for natalie ;-)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? natalie’s because she’s amazing and works so hard!!!! and she can always cheer me up and im so in love w her

13. Whose behavior made you appalled? mine bc i could never just get my shit together and do my homework when i was supposed to :) < thats from last year but lmfao same!

14. Where did most of your money go? RENT, movie/event tix, food, in that order

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? THE BIG SICK, the new season of sv, p much all of the events that i listed in the first question lol

16. What song will always remind you of 2017? umm honestly probably any song from melodrama

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer? I’m a. happier, b. probably thinner? or maybe the same idk, and c. definitely DEFINITELY poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? read and write and watch movies and write and read about movies

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Spending money and also being bitter about everything for no reason <– last year and the year before that AGAIN and also same!

20. How did you spend Christmas? working at AMC which i hated every second of :)

21. Did you fall in love in 2016? yes with my amazing girlfriend @carrot-gallery

22. What was your favorite TV program? silicon valley, AMERICAN VANDAL, the good place, great british bake off

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? nah just politicians who like. actively want me to die lol

24. What was the best book you read? bitch,

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? mitski like why the fuck did i sleep on her..... tbh thats about it bc i still listen to the same music i did 10 years ago

26. What did you want and get? I wanted a steadier/better paying job and i have it!

27. What did you want and not get? idk i wanted to be financially stable on my own and i still dont have that

28. What was your favorite film of this year? ugh i hate this question! ok in no order: THE BIG SICK, GOOD TIME, A GHOST STORY, GET OUT, THE FLORIDA PROJECT

29. What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying? uhhh having my sweet girlfriend by my side each and every day

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017? sometimes chic, always sweaty

31. What kept you sane? Sydney, my best friend in the entire world. (This was my answer from last year and the year before that and the year before that AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT but it still holds true) also everyone in the sv discord chat still AND natalie of course of course

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? kumail nanjiani duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, taika waititi, and martin starr always and probably more but i legit cant think of anyone rn lol

33. What political issue stirred you the most? yikes all of it. all of the issues (this was from last year but same lmao)

34. Who did you miss? i miss my dogs and my family and my girlfriend 35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017. You can set goals for yourself and talk about it all you want but it’s nothing until you actually start working towards it and doing something about it. <– answer from last year and the year before that and the year before that, still true!! imma keep that. also idk just like, there are good days and super bad days and ive survived all of them so its just a reminder to myself that ill be okay.

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. These days will all seem better in time Waiting on that hindsight

#2017 #personal #sorry that my answer to the first question is SO LONG but i did a lot this year!#and its fun to recap anyway #also this has been sitting in my drafts for a week lol so here ya go

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buzzmemes · 4 years

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I hate this

I hate this : Memes

your passport photo and copy of passport At my school, the homework was to color the picture. So very true... In my school it’s so bad, the teacher projects it on the whiteboard ah, nightmares Soo true XD They say that because you cropped it out. And that is a fact They use plotters I get it! Lol that’s good shit Im sory Toad The homework that steals your time and your lunch money 99% of sane teachers shows u the color image on smart board No teachers want to show u crappy print Just understand it. Color printer is expensive. You’re telling me that teachers give out free black children? Bet, already got three in the basement itsa me, Noir-io Facts tho It'sa me, a-Copyo! We all make mistakes in the heat of passion, Jimbo. Come back in ten years And they pop in a “do you see the ... in the picture” question Why mario on the right looks like he's about to wake me up at 3 am saying with deep demonic voice It's time for me to turn you into my spaghetti Is this the new "We have ____ at home" ? Since im in school this is to relatable The math graphs were the worst though 30 years of saving princesses, 30 years of smashing brown mushrooms. And for what? Cake? Mario!? Why does this remind me of the fearsome Llapp Goch Master. There's a good chance this is unique! I checked 103,921,185 image posts and didn't find a close match Whenever I got bad copies I'd always split the best copies around the room so every student was at least near a good copy and keep a bad one for myself... Remember when you were the chosen one to go out of class and get em papers wonderful If Mario was in Papers, Please AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA printer companies: see you little shits? this is why your printer needs colored cartridges! My name is paublo Yes Is that pablo It's supposed to be not centered Based on a true story Itsa me, Marijuanio! he looks so sad:( NVM took a secound look he looks like he bout to ask me if i wanna buy WEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDD Kinda looks like Hitler though Noah get the Death Star. My kindergarten teacher wife has to print shit at home for this reason. Effectively costs $300/year in paper/ink and another $100 to replace whatever broken down color ink printer we have in a given year. I want her to transition to laser, but haven't been able to convince her. More like the board of Education, principal and superintendents wanting another raise so the kids get B&W copies. At our large school we have 1 color copier, the rest are black and white. More often than not, kids are not getting color copies. Budget. Why is this too true Don't you be knocking LaserJet. Those things were a tank whose toner lasted a long time. DeskJet is what you are looking for. Made with HP LaserJet 100 color MFP Same Mario on the right side looks like sleep paralysis demon, ngl. Mario and Noireio. Top 10 hollywood stars ruined by drug addiction. It looks like if he ran into me he'd try to stuff me into an animatronic suit where I belong Mario looks like he's going to go on a mugging spree Too true Me looking at my paper: HERE WE GOOOO One more gram common u can do it is fentanyl the new drug to go? i only appy the fentanyl patches on them cancer patients at work, so they don't suffer 24/7. a couple of months ago there was a problem at our elderly home, bc some crazies tried to dig them used patches out of our trash..have fun with patches which are covered in shit and piss You should have done 64 or 69 Bro youd die before you even got through half a gram of fentanyl wtf do you even know what fentanyl is lmao A true epic gamer moment God I wish I had some pure fent Issa me, Black tar heroin Mario! Come with me and meet my gang of druga dealers! I really Was expecting a rickroll lmao And this is probably what he's listening to on his alone time https://youtu.be/ijBrulQXE2U It me mrio I jst snrted one mre grm and I jst deid DO IT FOR THE GRAM Go ahead and do another gram just one more gram Legendary The homework that steals your time and your lunch money............... Luigi says: do the coke to get the smoke Betta tell your moms your dads your ministers... WOOOMP WOOOMP WOOOMP!!!! Justa what me the Doctor Mario prescribed Mama mia I a need a more of that a shit YAHOOOOOO!!!! And remember kids - when you do drugs, you go to hell before you die! It’s a me druggooo Mario! I have snorted 68 grams of pure fentanyl and I am going to die. Itsame itsame I’m literally studying for an exam right now and my professor put that on his own notes... like bro nobody gives a shit about your stats notes I had a professor just say “don’t waste your money on the book. Just google book name pdf and it should be the first link.” Then he did in in class go show us And then you have the ones that sell their own 40 page notes in 2 sections for €20 each at the college book store. Or the ones that make class notes and give them out in the first class. Even better are the ones that accidentally send a pdf of their own book that they make no money on due to a shitty publisher to one or two people in the class. my favorite kinds of professors A full commitment is what I'm thinking of A lot of emulators come with a warning like "Use a bios file from your own console. Do not download one for free from the Internet!" I saw something on TIL a while back, during the prohibition era of the United States, some companies sold grape concentrate. They had a warning on them that said something to the effect of "after adding the concentrate to water, do not let it sit for two weeks as it will ferment into wine." As if...they wanted you to do it! That's a pretty calculated statement for them to make. *mobile errors I had calculus profs who would tell us 'I legally cannot advise you to steal copywrited material so under no circumstances should you go to this website and torrent the textbook for free instead of buying it from the overpriced book store and wasting your money' I always love those blank pages that just have in like size i font "Do not write here" for no fucking reason. Then the teacher tells you that they didn't see it I like when it’s in huge, WHITE print in the middle of the fucking page so half the assignment is cut off I like when it says on the side of the paper COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL DO NOT PHOTOCOPY OR DISTRIBUTE BY ANY MEANS Or the "here's a form that was made in Excel, if you could fill it out so that we can input the information back in Excel that would be great." "yeah..." "But the image gets worse!" Work in Japan. Teachers give me a copied paper. "just copy it. They have the file on their damn computer. Which is where we are sitting. -20 points. I can’t even read the damn question At my school, we get lectured for printing a class set rather than just a master. They say it’s about toner being cheaper and the copier cartridges are much much bigger. There are also a lot of places where teachers don't have access to a shared laser printer like that and don't have any option but to make photocopies, so stuff like the OP can be unavoidable sometimes. Genuinely not a problem in my school - we have a fleet of MFDs for bulk printing. We have an admin assistant in charge of the reprographics room who can interrupt jobs if needed as well. It's just an old mindset that they can't get out of. Yeah but then you have to be the asshole that released a print job with 200+ pages while others are waiting to use the copier since this is the only one you can print to. What is full sending? huzzah, a man of quality Have you tried full sending it? From an IT perspective, usually it's not that they want you to know what triggered the problem, they want you to provide concise information on what exactly you were doing up until the issue occurred. Though I do understand that IT technicians are notoriously unsociable lol I'm sure thats a great suggestion but that's the thing is that IT acts like its up to the enduser to already know whats causing the issues and what needs to be done to fix it. Also this doesn't solve his/her issue of getting staples on the copies. Have your IT reinstall your driver and you can select the options that your printer has. likely you are on a global driver, or it wasn't installed correctly! Or if I want staples. We can only select staples on our copier itself. It would be easier if the print queue thing was reliable. But I can't keep running back to my room if it didn't send it, so I make extra copies from my first one. Or if I need front/back from different originals I work in IT support for a school - teachers, for some fucking reason beyond my understanding, seem to print one copy of something, then photocopy it for their classes. Telling them that just printing it for everyone keeps the quality better doesn't sink in. It costs the same, comes out of the same device, and it's less work, but I'm the insane one. Th s rin er se ms o æ run ing lo n ink To the knee And my axe! And my sword! Take mine too! Fuck off take a useless arrow Actually it seems this printer is low on incas. Damn u incas "I'm so sorry kids, our ancient printer is not working properly again" Read the full article

#Memes #memesdaily

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04091657 · 7 years

Text

02/15/17

someone killed themselves at dundas station today, trains between bloor-yonge and union stopped running due to “personal injury”, reminds me of the time you told me about cherrie (was it her?) complaining about how someone’s suicide made her commute weird. i ended up having to go to bloor-yonge, then st george, then back home. on the train from st george some girl across me had a perfume on that smelled very familiar to your tom ford velvet orchid, which made me miss you.

i thought about writing this on paper instead, but you know typing is much easier aka i can get easily get more stuff down, i dont know, i’m still deciding whether or not to send you this link now or after i come back. i think i will send you this now along with your playlist.

i know i told you i didnt think my therapy sessions were very helpful, but today it was pretty helpful, i feel like ive come to a conclusion, i want to talk to you about this tomorrow when im on the flight. seoji is driving me to the airport and sunny is coming along as well. i wish instead we could take the pearson express together and hold hands. but saying goodbye would be so so so so so difficult.

i got mcdonald’s at st clair. its all cold now. i got two sweet and sour sauces. i wish i couldve gotten one sweet and sour and one barbeque because that means im sharing it with you. i love eating with you.

really have to be honest my heart jumped when you followed this blog i want to tell you to start a blog i can read as well but i feel like that’d be cheating cus we’d just be responding to each other. maybe if we have enough self control to only write down thoughts that came to us naturally (and not through these posts) we can do that. it’s up to you, im FUCKING CHEATING RN CUS ITS LIKE IM TALKING TO U but if you do decide to do so, send me a link.

reminder for you to use my netflix account so you can save money on yours.

not talking to you is so fucking painful, i dont know how i went by two weeks like this, maybe its cus now i know you’re there and i can just talk to you. but you’re right we have to have some resolve. i ate 10 chicken nuggets and have a little bit of fries i cant finish but i already know you’re proud of me. i think i am proud of myself too, im not sure, im really only proud of myself when you are and i know thats something i’ll have to work on. you too.

sleepy i am always so sleepy i hate being sleepy i miss you cant stop looking at our tumblrs i want us to be happy i want to do cute stuff with you and treat you like an soft baby angel but i also want to do dirty stuff and treat you like a whore lol i keep fantasizing about peeing on you i cant believe im fantasizing about PISS like wtf lol but everything is so so hot with you, i could give my entire body to you whenever you want so you can use it however you want, sometimes when i think dirty thoughts about you i get so wet, idk why im like sexting myself rn but god youre so hot the way you moan in my ear the way your body moves and how you bite my lips and when our tongues intertwine its honestly the best feeling in the world. i want to taste you so so bad right now fuck studying i want to tie you up and punish you for not loving yourself enough i want to piss all over your body while you look up at me seductively and beg for more i want to masturbate in front of you i want to put on a show for you baby oh god i am so fucking horny right now i just want to spank you and dry hump you and youll tear the skin on my back because even though our genitals arent even being touched our bodies are connected in every single way, oh god im so wet right now when did this post that was supposed to be my thoughts turn into such a dirty fucking post but i guess this is part of my thoughts. i want to taste you so badly. i really fucking want to pee on you. i want to masturbate right now to that video of you where your wrists are tied up and my fingers are deep down your throat and you call me daddy and i pleasure you. i’d come so hard but im going to be so sad after so i dont know if i should wank haha

love fuckin hurts

i wonder what youre doing what youre thinking rn i hope you are somewhat happy or content i really want to hear from you but i know youre being strong so i will try to be strong too.

i almost called you just now. almost

i want to have phone sex with you and hear you cum

i still cant believe rhydonmyhardon sent you nudes i really thought he was gay and though i know they mean nothing to you i really cant help but feel loads jealous but i dont want you to keep burning bridges for me, but i dont want him to be talking to you for the wrongs reasons either like you said, i dont want him to use you i hope he’ll see the value in your personality instead of seeing you as someone he can send nudes to and possibly get one back even though i know you wouldnt bc of me but if you want to i dont want to stop you

i wonder what itd feel like if i had a dick and i could cum inside you Lmaooooooooo what a weirdo(me)

lmao ive just been stalking his tumblr cus thats how bad my jealousy is Fuck

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riskeith · 3 years

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hi bb!

oh rip... the ol’ laptop fan situation. it must sound like a plane when you play genshin right? yes, we’re more prepared now. i remember the first few years there were so many fires and stuff to the point where they even made bbq illegal. such a mess, but it took away a fire hazard which is good. i believe aus had the same situation right?

awwww sounds so cute! pokémon go? no i don’t! i dropped it after that summer sjsksjdk. do you play while you’re walking that’s so adorable. wait bakudeku zine??? you’ve peeked my interest.

ooh that makes sense! i thought about the gold seelie too actually! the babie might bring you mora which is always good to have. also there’s fanart of the gold seelie being aether and those are sooo cute. have you seen any?

help i hope xiao knows how lucky he is to have such a devoted fan as yourself!! you’re really pulling all the strings for him i applaud your patience and determination. dude albedo is like... easily one of the prettiest animated character i’ve seen! he’s gorgeous! also i like his elevator move that could be so handy. and for the dancing videos, just search on yt baron bunny dancin or something hehe.

WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. WHAT THE FUCK? wait are you serious? venti’s jpn va is HINATA? I HAD NO IDEA WTF???? god..,. that’s it i’m switching to jpn dub that’s insane... i was actually gonna ask you once if you could apply haikyuu characters to the game who would they be and the only one i was sure about was that hinata would be venti.... 😭 you’re so talented for knowing that hehe.. also you can say that you’re studying when you’re gaming then lmao. study smart not hard. god i’m still in shock over venti. this made my morning ngl.

i have no idea how fic collabs work either. i had a friend that did it once and she said they each wrote a chapter but i feel like that might be confusing if the writers use different writing styles..? idk it seems fun but kind of scary too..

ilytttttt little blushing girl.. <3

it always goes back to dragonspine does it not... 😶 but damn it’s been about a month and you’ve saved 12k that’s super solid. since xiao will be coming around feb that means you’ll have another month-ish to save up as well... so girl you’re def getting him sjdksjdk.. <3 and so much other goodies as well. unless you don’t pull him on the first try you might get some other great characters and weapons/artifacts as well. you need to force me to start saving up too bc if venti is really coming back.. i /have/ to get him esp now that i know about the va..

they’re adorable! i don’t know much about their story but i think they’re best friends, right? which makes it even more adorable. and there’s so much fanart of them as well. dude speaking of, genshin stans make the BEST fanart. i spend hours just looking at them and it’s perfect. i imagine there’s so much on twitter too, right?

god. remember shiro and adam. dreamworks would def not do that.. lmao...

your bravery for even considering posting wip. i’m taking my hat off for you. also, one writer to another; how does your writing process usually go? i’m always interested in seeing how other fic writers work bc it varies so much.

oh!! i was all over the place but i really liked sm groups. and loona! you don’t like slow songs? like even slow indie? aksjjdhdkdhf im gonna keep asking to find a middle group bc right now i’m super lost help...

i don’t really like sleeping in so it’s fine HEHE it’s 9 am now and i woke up about an hour ago which was perfect. 10 hour sleep? immaculate. not yikes. sleeping is always good never stress about it shjdhdjd, think about when you go back to school and have to pull all nighters etc.

kiss <3

heya!!

yeah HAHAAH it gets so hot omg.. and my laptop is supposed to have pretty good specs so i can’t imagine what it would’ve been like if i tried to play on my old one yikes 😬 oh shoot! yeah we have a fire danger rating too, the second lowest one is “high” and it goes beyond “extreme” to “code red”/“catastrophic” lollll. and we’ve regularly got fire bans in the summer to try and prevent anything!

hfsdkjfhs summer 2016? god i remember that time so clearly... iconic 😩 i do play sometimes! normally if there are any mystic gyms around me to join, otherwise i’m kinda lazy about actually catching the pokemon HAHA oops. https://twitter.com/kotatsutomikan1 here!! does that mean 👀 you main bkdk 👀👀👀

oooo i thought the seelies were actually just there for decoration? AHAH. yessss I saw one with a whole lineup! https://twitter.com/icedkappe/status/1347555831831699457 look how cute 🥺 ugh but that reminds me of something i was thinking of earlier today, i hope they’ll introduce skins or something later down the line? fshdk like think of the potential. it always upsets me when i click the hanger icon and it only lets me change their glider fhsjfskfjsdjkf

god when i saw albedo’s hair... <3333333 and also his eyes??? um chief alchemist? more like PRETTIEST alchemist. yesss i’ve been doing plunge attacks a lot more recently (preparing for xiao?) and honestly ugh if i had albedo.. I LOOKED THOSE VIDEOS UP!!! THEY ARE SO FUCKING ADORABLE WHAT EHE FSUCJK!!!!!! my god. fancam for characters who? ? from now on only fancams of baron bunny are allowed 😤😤😤

AHAHAH YEAH HE IS!!!! wait have you finished the world quest with him tho?? either way i’m sure you’ll be able to find clips of it in japanese dub online... his ‘ehe’ is so cute my god.. study smart not hard my motto!!!! <3

yeah I feel like chapters is confusing which is why separating by POV might work better? definitely scary tho lol .... such uncharted territory for me

IM DEF GETTING HIM!!! xiao i am patiently waiting for you to come home 👐🙇‍♀️ yes!! i really hope the four stars on his banner are good bc i’m def gonna be pulling it a lot AHAHHA i hope hm.... i wanna get xingqiu to match with chongyun but beido seems so cool too 😩 tho i already have so many claymore users fsdhfksdfhsjd. oh that also reminds me venti’s elemental burst dialogue ‘kaze da!’ is so cute... like his voice is so melodic??? omg.... WAIT lemme send you this interview i found https://youtu.be/g3floaU41Uc !! AND START SAVE UP MARRIAGE ANON!!!!! tho i think he’s like 5 banners away so you still have time if you do wanna pull now... fhdsfkjds

they are!!! chongyun has this line in his story profile “Who could he possibly trust, if not his fine friend Xingqiu?” 🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭😭😭 how cute is he i love him so much :((((((((((((( yeah there are so many on twitter!! i don’t see much on tumblr tbh bc i don’t look at my dash too often AHHAHA but it’s all over my twitter timeline~

my writing process depends!! but typically i type out the outline of a fic/write out certain scenes, then fill in everything around that ahaha. usually my ideas come from a line i thought up that i really like or just a concept. i usually also type out my plans in all caps LOL. i hope that makes sense lmaooo how about you? do you just go for it or plan everything out first?

ooo yeah sm have some really nice stuff... and nice! i never gave loona a shot FJKDHFKSJ. i don’t think so?? the slow songs i do like are usually exceptions rather than the rule LMAO but i like hozier’s stuff even tho they’re slow (but who doesn’t? AHAH) honestly i couldn’t even give you examples bc i can’t think of any FHSDKFJS like i guess for example, lovely by billie eilish and khalid, i like the song but on a normal day if it came up on shuffle i’d skip it? FHSFKSD im so sorry legit i am no help at all fhskdfhsjdfjsdkfhsdhkfhk but what are some artists you listen to often?

i never pull all-nighters!! it’s kinda like my rule, even if i’m absolutely fucked i’ll deal with it later rather than not sleep fhskjfsdf. (or maybe i just haven’t reached that stage yet... i hope not!). also wait a second i just registered what you wrote.. YOU WOKE UP AT 8AM????????? my goodness... legit i don’t think i did that a single time in 2020. there was a week i woke up at 8:30 every day but very quickly i started sleeping in again omg... that energy! i’m also gonna try start waking up early but it’s hard when i go to bed then read fic 😩

kisses!!! hope your day has been swell so far xoxo

#marriage anon #wowclunaanswers #long post

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