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ashintheairlikesnow · 4 years

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Colton/Kauri Fanfic Drabble 2: Love Confession

I promised to reward anyone who drew a specific, amazing fanart idea I was sent in an ask with a fake fanfiction drabble that featured the Colton (belongs to @shameless-whumper)/Kauri pairing.

This is my second “Cori” fanfic, this one is for @my-whumpy-little-heart‘s prompt Love Confession. These are written as though they are excerpts of AO3 fanfics people wrote after seeing Kauri on The Host’s YouTube Video in Who’s the Better Box Boy.

And they are so. much. fun. to. write.

P.S. @shameless-whumper wrote this fucking excellent piece over on AO3 of Cori fanfic that broke my heart and I want it to break yours. Required reading, 100% required. You will be answering questions about this fic on your final exam.

Tagging: @maybeawhumpblog, @pepperonyscience, @haro-whumps, @18-toe-beans, @burtlederp, @finder-of-rings, @giggly-evil-puppy, @whimpers-and-whumpers, @whump-it, @lumpofwhump, @pumpkinthefangirl

CW: Aftermath of seriously dubious dubcon, references to dubcon/noncon, aftermath of biting, aftercare in general, reference to violence/restraints

When the Camera’s Off by PetRescuer445 Youtubers: The Host

Author Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings, Colton/Kauri, Kauri/Colton, Colton, Kauri, The Host, Angst, Dubious Consent, Extremely Dubious Consent, Cannot Emphasize Enough How Dubious the Consent Is, Not Safe Not Sane But Kind of Consensual?, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Kind Of Consensual Bondage, Started Out Angsty Smut Turned Into a Love Story, Kauri is a sweetheart, Colton is a treasure, the Host would probably love this, story changed a lot from original plan, honestly this was just an excuse to write crazy smut for my favorite Youtuber, then it turned into a love story between two pets, alternate universe, human pets, this fire took twenty chapters to catch but damn it still burns,

Summary: Alternate Universe: What if Colton and Kauri both got sent to the Host as a gift from Whumpees-R-Us? A peek into the life of Colton, the Host’s Domestic pet, and Kauri as their Romantic pet!

Because let’s face, nobody with those big blue eyes would ever be made anything but a Romantic pet, am I right?!

Two pets bond in unexpected ways when one of them takes care of the Host’s household while the other ~takes care of the Host~. Super slow burn, but trust me, we’re going smutty places! I promise and have I ever let you down? :) Remember comments and kudos are always appreciated!

Chapter 33/40

The Bath

“Why me?” Colton pitches his voice low, so the sound of the water rushing from the faucet into the bathtub will ensure that Kauri can’t hear him from where he sits on the bathmat next to the tub, shivering and hunched over, staring down at the ground with a horribly familiar, empty expression.

“Why not you?” The Host answers, flashing their brilliant too-wide smile. “I’ve got shit to do, babe. Have to edit the new video and then I’m meeting with some people about product placement.”

“It’s not my purpose to, to clean up Romantics,” Colton argues, but there’s no real fight in his voice. For one, it won’t work - the Host doesn’t care whether or not Colton wants to be responsible for this. For two, the Host only ever enjoys Colton fighting so they can push and push and push until he stops. “You, you d-did this-”

“Colton. Babe.” The Host reaches up to pat the side of his face with their palm, and Colton flinches away when they scratch behind his ear like he’s a dog. “Listen. You’re the Domestic, right?”

There’s a pause, when Colton realizes he’s expected to answer. “Y-Yes, I am.”

The hand moves around behind his hair, and the Host’s smile changes a little as they grip hard and yank his head back until Colton’s knees have to bend to stay standing, hissing through his teeth. “Domestics take care of the house, right? Right, Babe?”

“Yes,” Colton manages, voice thin and strained. “We do.”

“Good. You cook, you clean, you come on camera for my viewers and give ‘em something as pretty as me to look at… and you take care of the household. And Kauri’s part of my household. Besides.” The Host abruptly lets go and shoots Colton a cheeky, wicked little smile. “You like seeing him naked exactly as much as I do. Don’t think I haven’t caught you watching me edit the private videos.”

Colton��s face burns. “I don’t think I’ve ever done that,” He says, trying for evasive, but the Host only laughs loud enough to make even Kauri flinch a little where he sits.

“Sure you haven’t. It’ll be our little secret.” The Host gives him a pinch to his cheek, tweaking the skin until it hurts, and then they walk away and leave Colton standing there, staring after them with murder in his eyes and his heart that never, ever reaches his hands.

Then he takes a deep breath, sighs, and turns to look into the bathroom at Kauri.

The Host’s Romantic pet is still sitting where he’d been left, on the bathmat next to the rapidly-filling giant bathtub. The Host was always bragging about how much it cost to get a bathtub this size (“big enough for five, I tried it out one weekend with friends and we really topped out at five”), and Kauri seems dwarfed next to it. Smaller, and lost inside his head, the way he gets sometimes after the Host was in a really good mood.

His stomach twisting, Colton moves towards him, crouching down in front of the other pet, tilting his head. “Kauri,” He says, softly. “The bathtub’s almost ready.”

Kauri blinks, and after a second the deep blue eyes focus on his dark brown. Then he smiles, and some of the emptiness falls off his face, shifting away like it’d never been there. “Oh, Colton,” He says, and his voice is low, a little deeper than you’d think for how delicate he looks. “Hey. I didn’t know you were there.”

“Hey. The Host asked me to sit with you, while you get cleaned up. Do you want that?”

He leaves the offer open, he always does - the Host is constantly having him sit with Kauri after stuff like this, because they never want to stick around to take care of him after they leave him like this. But he always leaves Kauri the option to say no.

“Yes, please,” Kauri whispers in the soft sweet voice that Colton is always trying to hear in any context but this. He holds up his hands, and Colton carefully avoids the bruises around his wrists as he grabs him by his upper forearms, close to his elbows, to pull him to his feet.

Kauri’s hair is a wild, riotous mess, but Colton doesn’t mind the way it brushes his face when Kauri stands up too fast and stumbles forward against him. The red stripes on his back are just welts, really - the Host’s heart hadn’t been in it this time. There are other things he doesn’t want to think about - the choke-chain around Kauri’s neck replacing his usual collar, the red underneath that promises to bruise in the morning, a bite mark so deep on one shoulder that you could probably identify the Host through the dental records.

“I’m going to help you step into the tub,” Colton says softly, and Kauri’s hands grip tightly onto his arms, looking up at him, swallowing hard.

“Can… can you get in, in with me?” Kauri asks, and his voice trembles just a little. “I just need… I could use someone with me. For a little bit, I’m just still kind of… coming down.”

The absolute last thing in the world Colton wants to hear about is how the Host is so good that Kauri has to recover from time with them - but sometimes ‘coming down’ doesn’t mean in a good way, and it looks like today is one of the shaky ones.

“Uh… sure. Yeah.” Colton looks away to hide the flush, moving Kauri gently over to the edge of the tub, trying to keep his eyes on anything but the marks left on the pale skin. They’re too red - or too purple already, some of them - and he can’t stop the surge of anger, the sense of wanting to fix this and make sure it never happens again.

It doesn’t work that way.

It never does, for the Box Boys.

So instead, he lets Kauri hold him for balance as he lifts one leg and then the other to step into the hot water, nearly scalding just the way Kauri likes it after times like this. Kauri doesn’t let go, fingers gripped so tightly they press into Colton’s skin, until he’s sitting down in the tub, in the middle of the giant space that seems to make him seem so small.

“Now… now you,” Kauri says, and tilts his head as he looks sideways up at Colton, and the Host makes fun of him for the way he looks at Colton like that, but Colton… secretly, and he’d never admit it… he loves it.

His hands go to pull the yellow branded sweatshirt off, just brushing at the hem when Kauri flinches back, looking down at the water. Colton drops his hands immediately. “Hey… I don’t have to, Kauri. You know that. I’ll just sit next to the tub-”

“No, I… I want you in the tub. But just… can you keep your clothes, um, on? I know… I know it’s ridiculous…”

Colton blinks, and then he slowly nods. He gets into the tub, feeling the water soak immediately into his gray sweatpants, and slowly lowers himself behind Kauri, until he’s soaked totally through, the nearly-burning water making his clothing half-float around him in the water.

Kauri doesn’t hesitate - as soon as Colton has settled he leans back against him, and Colton slides arms around his waist, clasping hands together under the water, just above Kauri’s navel. It’s quiet, now - they can’t hear the Host and honestly they might have left.

He hopes they left.

Kauri’s hair tickles at his nose and his neck as he leans his head back against Colton’s shoulder, humming to himself, some song that both of them almost remember but neither really does. He’s warm, and his skin feels soft even where it’s been bitten.

Colton slowly cranes his neck, leans down, and kisses at the ring of teeth around Kauri’s shoulder. When Kauri doesn’t pull away, he does it again, and again, and again, once for every single toothmark he can count.

Eventually, Kauri starts to cry.

Neither of them speak, while he does, or acknowledge it - Kauri cries a lot, after, and all Colton can do is be there to hold him through it. The low, half-buried sobs eventually get louder, and Colton’s arms get tighter. He never lets go. He never pulls away from Kauri, he never gives him anything but the comfort he really needs, comfort the Host is totally unable to give.

When the louder sobs have worn themselves out and Kauri’s shoulders stop shaking, when he goes boneless and relaxed again in the water, Colton leans forward. There are tear tracks glimmering on Kauri’s cheeks, but his eyes are open, and warm, and they’re not empty.

“Better?” Colton whispers.

“Better,” Kauri replies, and snuggles back against him. They sit in silence for a long time, and Colton’s heart beats hard in his chest.

“Hey, Kauri, um, how long since we came here?”

There’s a pause, a moment for thought. “Year or so.”

“A year.” They were given together, but they weren’t a bonded pair. They’d never even seen each other before their boxes were opened by the Host, live on camera. Colton was opened first, and all he could think as he watched the Host take Kauri’s blindfold off was Oh, I really like his eyes. “That’s funny, it doesn’t feel like it’s been that long, does it?”

“Not really.” Kauri turns his head, twisting around a little so he could look into Colton’s eyes again. His own are red-rimmed from crying but a clear and perfect blue. The water around them is still hot enough to stay comfortable, although where it had soaked in all the way up to Colton’s shoulders felt chilly in the cool air-conditioned room. “But… I like that you’re here with me, Colton.”

“Yeah?”

Kauri smiles at him, and the empty look from before is gone. Kauri bounces back fast from the Host’s attentions - he’s trained to but also there’s something innate in him that just seems to get over it, move past it, move on. Colton’s the one left simmering in resentment, while Kauri smiles when the Host comes back from wherever they go some days, as if nothing ever happened, gives a bright, surprised laugh when the Host shoves him up on the kitchen counter while Colton tries desperately to cook dinner, lets out an excited gasp when the Host pushes him into walls.

Once, the Host pushed him over the couch on his stomach and his head was right next to Colton’s where he sat working on some sound editing. The Host told him to stay sitting right where he was.

That had been the longest fucking twenty minutes of Colton’s life.

Not that he could remember his life.

The sounds Kauri makes are always so practiced, so robotic. Colton can never keep the flicker of disgust from his face. Kauri’s just a better liar.

But there’s one thing Colton is pretty sure Kauri isn’t lying about.

“Hey, can… can I ask you something?” Colton’s voice is still low, just in case. In the Host’s house you could never be sure where a camera might be, or a hidden microphone. They were always careful - had developed something like a code, a long time ago, without either one needing to elaborate on it or explain it.

But he was reasonably sure that there weren’t any microphones in the bathroom.

Yet.

Although there probably would be at least a camera if the Host ever figured out that they sat together like this.

“Ask away,” Kauri says, closing his eyes and resting his head back against Colton’s shoulder, turning so his forehead is resting against Colton’s neck.

“What would you say…” Colton trains his eyes on the big window on the other side of the bathroom, the wispy white curtains, the frosted glass. “What would you say if I told you that I, um-”

Kauri grins - Colton can’t quite see it, but it’s like he can feel it, the smile as much under his skin as on Kauri’s face. “I think I know what you’re asking.”

“… what would you say, then?”

“I’d say I love you, too.”

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nightmaretyrantvantas · 5 years

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So I’m finally getting around to writing out a bunch of info about my Sander Sides au so I hope youre all ready--(its like 1 am im so sorry for any spelling mistakes and missed tags)

So its 1 am on a work night and I cant sleep and I’ve had lots of ideas and canon things for this au bouncing around my head for days and now TONIGHTS THE NIGHT ITS HAPPENING IM DELIVERING YOU ALL THE DETAILS AND EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF AND TYPE

Also please feel free to ask about this! I know I got a few new followers from all my recent sander sides art and also thanks to @sugarglider9603 reblogging some art I made of their au I got the biggest flood of exposure and attention on my art ive ever had and I have so much to thank them for, for all recent exposure ive gotten the past couple days( theyre so sweet and lovely and easy to talk to sugar deserves all the love--) and its given me a huge surge of motivation and confidence to post this. And please, my inbox is always open to talk about my aus or my art! Ask questions, send requests, send headcanons or ideas, send fluff angst im open to anything and I try to do all requests sent to me(sooner or later)

Oh oh! and please id you catch any and all the little inspirations or anything let me know

And finally this au is a LAMP au with Remile and Demus on the side

Ahem ahem anyway onto the au!!!

More under the cut so I dont flood your screen too bad!

Ok so!

This Au was originally inspired by @residentanchor‘s amazing fanfic A Lesson in Practicality and also a little bit by @prettyinaccurate‘s fanged virgil au( I’ll get more into that further down)

So it takes place in a (currently) unnamed bigger city I based off San Francisco and Sacramento( because I live in Cali and those are the two major cities ive really visited ya know?) The boys are all in various stages of their twenties when they move into a four bedroom apartment together: Patton Foster is the oldest of the roomies at 27, then Logan Masters at 26, Roman Prince at 24, and finally Virgil Collins at 22. They move in together because it all works out for them really, the apartment is in a good distance to all their current jobs, whether by bus or even in Pat’s case in walking distance and with all four of them it was well affordable and was pretty nice. I mean hey it even came with a little communal balcony ( since theyre on third floor of the building)

Things are understandably a little rocky at first , i mean isnt it always though?

Virgil has alot of anxiety and so he tends not to talk really at all at the beginning unless he ABSOLUTELY had to, mostly communicating in noncomittal noises and soft grumbles, and he was fresh out of collage and barely two years into his job and out on his own for the first time and he wasnt really ready for it either like christ too many people

Patton was bright bubbly and caring. This wasnt his first rodeo with roomies, I mean cmon, hes been sharing a room with his older brother Damian(deceit) on and off almost all his freakin life, nor was it his first time living on his own with strangers(hes lived in two different parts of two when he was job hopping before he settled down in his current part time job)

Roman was extroverted loud and exciteable, he too was used to sharing his living space( he had TWO siblings after all) and before he had moved into the apartment he had tried living on his own and with other roommates while he attended collage, but those just didnt work out well ( he ended up staying with his older brother Remy in his studio apartment across the city while he finished out that semester and searched for a job to keep an income.

Logan was serious minded stern toned and confident, he had a minor degree in teaching that he was slowly repursueing and had been out on his own for awhile before he had moved in. And though cold at first he soon found his group of housemates...enjoyable.

Its about a month into them living together that they learn exactly why despite slowly getting close and getting to know each other Virgil still kept a wide distance: He had entirely sharp teeth.

“ I dunno....I was born with them..theyve always been a sharp pain in my ass...” - virgil, about his teeth

Of course just having sharp teeth wasnt bad enough oh no. You see a few years back when he was about 18 he was young and dumb and made horrifically stupid and reckless decisions under peer pressure and ended up doing something that not only pointedly (haha oh god im not funny) chipped his front teeth but it fucked up his teeth pretty majorly, he went from having a normal overbite to almost having a goddamn underbite and crooked all his teeth, and the only way to fix it( because somehow miraculous for all the damage done it turned out to be mostly reversable aside from the chipping) was getting braces to realign his teeth. So he’s had pretty purple braces over his fangs since he was 18 and they werent expected to come off until he was AT LEAST 25 and he was insecure about them. ( he got mocked for them through his two and a half years of junior collage)

Once the gang finds out they are understanding and helpful and dont make a big deal about it( though virgil gains a significant amount of more vampire related nicknames from roman)

Once they get close and comfortable around each other the apartment is pretty warm and lively!

Virgil works at the art store as an assistant manager and head stocker( a bit of a dream come true since he was an art student)

Roman works as a part time waiter at a family resturant as well as working at a nearby theater( he was of course a lovely theater major)

Patton worked at a nearby cafe and bakery as a bit of everything! He helped wait tables, serve behind the counter, and helped in the back in the kitchen( the owners were family friends and he’d been working there almost four to five years at that point, boi knows how to do everything)

Logan worked at a big name bookstore, and also provided tutoring sessions for highschool students on the side by commision

More FACTS~~

Family ages for the big families go as follows:

Fosters: Damian(28), Patton(27)

Prince: Remy(26), Roman(24, older twin by 10 minutes), Remus(24, younger twin)

Emile is 27 and is a licensed therapist and works as a counselor for young adults that volunteers at the nearby library to ready to children

Remy works as a coffee barista in Emile’s building

Remus does alot of odd jobs, kinda working as an independent for hire and gets a surprising steady flow of work and pay. Hes still a trash man though, but hes a successful trash man( partly thanks to Damian calling in favors with connections)

Damian works at a law firm slowly moving into the position of prosecutor

Virgil doesnt really get along with his family and at some point Emile offers to take virgil in as his adopted brother, with Damian assuring him if he wanted concrete legal papers to start changing his last name, cutting ties with his family, anything needed for it he’d see to it that they’d be providing(something our boi really appreciates)

Remy visits Emile on his breaks since hes literally just...two hallways down and vice versa

Damian and Remus live together in the next, slightly smaller city over because Damian’s work transferred him to a different office in order for him to keep moving up in the ranks so to speak.

Hes also good at what he does.

Family nights happen whenever they can

Patton got to teach them how to cook alot of complicatied dishes from scratch, a bonding time he adores

Roman got Virgil an Espeon hoodie after they all start dating and virgil loves it and wears it alot around the house because its a thicker hoodie and warm( though he tries to ignore the big ears and the obnovious tail

Virgil also loves visiting Roman’s work on what Ro likes to refer to as “ hellish days” AKA kids day which means goofy kid friendly theme days. His favorite was probably alice in wonderland day when Roman was Tweedle Dee

Roman played J.D at the local theater and likes to hum some of the his songs to switch up the Disney

The balcony is covered in houseplants and and a corner of old blankets and pillows to sit and chill on

Once a month Logan and Patton have what is affectionately referred to as the Cat Discourse

After any particularly rough days at work Patton tends to massage Logan’s shoulders and back to make sure Lo doesnt get any really bad stress knots

in return when Logan sees Patton’s head a hard day he makes Patton’s favorite drink and pulls him into a hug and let the older man fall asleep in his arms while they watch movies

Pat and roman sense each other’s bad days and order in some cliche diner food and hole up in pattons room with Pattons computer and relax the shittiness away with comedy specials and movies

Likewise Virgil has a knack of picking up Roman’s bad days and always grabs a couple glasses and a bottle kinda cheap wine and they end up curling up together on Romans bed marathoning Disney movies on Virgil’s laptop

and when Virgil closes himself off more than normal Logan manages to lure him out of his room and they end up sitting out on the balcony quietly talking and stargazing

so loving and fond and soft with each other

you hurt one of them you gonna get BEAT by the others.

Speaking of getting beat, never EVER mess with Roman or Remus in Remy’s proximity

Remy Andrew Prince can and WILL fuck you right up if you hurt his little brothers. He’s protective.

and where Remy will rearrange your face Damian will ruin you mentally and legally if you so much as mistreat a single freckle on his little brother’s face, despite knowing that Patton is fully capable of taking care of himself.

Everyone protects Virgil, dont mess with or hurt virgil or you have the pack coming for ya throat

aaaaaaaaaaaaaand thats all I have for right now! Of course more will be added but now its almost three in the morning and I have work at 1:30pm and im sleepy finally! But I hope you guys like this! And please, feel free to talk to me about it, my inbox is always open!!

Taglist: @phantommoonpeople @sweetsweetemo @loganberrysanders

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ichibri · 6 years

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Writing Tag

I was tagged by @pilindiel (Thx :D & It’s good to be back)

Responses under the cut!

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean?

It’s a play on how in Bleach Ichigo’s sisters call him Ichi-nii. I always saw Ichigo as a brother figure and wished he was my brother instead of the jackass of an older brother that I have, so it’s IchiBri cause Bri is the first half of my last name.

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback?

Wrong Place, Wrong Time. Which is honestly surprising cause it was my first sh/eith fic and I’m still in awe that so many people continue to follow it and leave comments every chapter.

3. What is your AO3 profile icon and why did you choose it?

It’s the same as my tumblr icon cause I adore Shiro and I love how pretty his eyes are in it.

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters?

All of them. Like honestly, when someone comments all the time, they become a dear friend to me. I have so much gratitude for them that I just want to shower them with love.

5. Is there a fanfic you keep going back to read again and again?

There’s some old Grimm/Ichi fics I absolutely loved in high school that I still reread every now and then.

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked?

Including author subscriptions, it’s 41. And I’ve got 73 bookmarks.

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most?

Magical, maybe?? Or slightly magical, like modern aus with demons or witches or time travel. Most of my original stuff is modern fantasy/supernatural/monster stuff too.

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total?

18 subscribed to me as an author, 251 story subscriptions, and 300 story bookmarks in total

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!)

I’d love to write some really dark, twisted shit. But yeah, not super into the whole ‘fiction equals reality’ argument that many people like tossing around. I’m lucky enough to avoid an/ties in the v.ld fandom so I’m not gonna push my luck.

10. Is there anything you’d like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc.

Outlining and sticking to a damn plot. I wing everything and change so much it’s not even funny. It’d be so much easier if I could sit down and plot out a story before starting it, but I’m too impatient for that.

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often?

Normally popular ships. Call me vain, but I prefer the bigger audience that comes with popular ships.

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day?

13. How many stories do you have saved in/ with your writing program?

As in like wips? Cause not counting one-liners or jumbled ideas tossed together, then about 6. But if overall, then everything I’ve written since freshman year of high school, so a lot.

14. Do you write down story ideas or just keep them in your head?

I write them down in a note pad app on my phone cause they normally come to me when I don’t have pen/paper. I’ve been known to wake up in the middle of the night with an idea, type it out on the app, and find garbled nonsense the next morning, lol.

15. Have you ever co- authored a story?

Kinda. More like co-authored an au, where we came up with it together and wrote our own separate takes on it.

16. How did you discover AO3?

A bit after I got into Bleach, I was looking for more fics cause ff.net just didn’t have many for the pairing I wanted, and I noticed quite a few authors were moving to AO3 so I checked it out.

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3?

No, but I’m super grateful for the readers I have.

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers?

Nope

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write?

Not in particular, but there are plenty of well-written, poetic fics that inspire me to write. Cause the best inspiration for me is reading others’ fics. But encouragement wise, that comes from my fandom friends. And my mom, lol. She reads everything of mine whether it’s fandom or not.

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author?

Don’t compare yourself to anyone but who you were yesterday. The writers you’re looking up to have been writing for many years, even decades. With tons of practice and an open mind willing to learn and develop, you’ll find your style and what works for you. Trust me, one day, you’ll look back and see how much you’ve grown, and you’ll feel immense pride in how far you’ve come. But first, you have to give yourself that time to grow.

21. Do you plot out your stories or do you just figure it out as you go?

I plot out the first 3-5 chapters and the climax, but everything else is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ And if it’s a oneshot, then I only have a general idea of what I want to write and let myself go whichever direction the words take me.

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do?

Yep. I’ll admit, I was hurt and pissed off at first. I ignored it, because they could have just as easily stopped reading if they didn’t like the direction the story was going. Like guys, if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all. Writers are people too, and unless you commissioned the story, you have no say in the direction a writer takes it.

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (Action, smut, etc)

Lol, I gave up trying to write smut when I realized I was ace, cause it’s just awkward as fuck, and I can’t stop laughing the entire time. But action scenes are kinda the bane of my existence. I think I’ve gotten down the basics and learning how to involve the 5 senses to make it more dynamic, but it’s still like pulling teeth for me. I prefer writing emotional vs physical.

24. What story(s) are you working on now?

Wrong Place, Wrong Time. Sh/eith Ferngully au. Sh/eith Heart Adventures au. And two original short stories, one about a grim reaper taking the soul of a baby and another about a human falling in love with an ichthyocentaur (basically a mermaid & a centaur all in one). Oh and they're lesbians because fck yeah they are.

25. Do you plan your new projects before you finish your current ongoing story(s)?

Yeah. I've got a huge list of projects/aus I want to do. My notepad app has so many snippets of different stories/plots it's not even funny.

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself?

No. I crumble under pressure, and trying to reach a daily word count always leaves me feeling like shit. Some days I'm lucky to write a single sentence and others I'll go on for hours.

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started?

God yeah. I've been writing stories since elementary school and it's hilarious reading what I thought was amazing back them. And even in just this past year, I've grown a lot and feel as though I've finally settled into a style that’s my own.

28. What is your favourite story that you have written?

Oh man, right now it's probably Grown-ups Come Back just because of how deep that cut me to write it. Like even now when I reread it, the emotions are still raw and I bawl my eyes out.

29. What is your least favourite story that you have written?

Ugh, Casper. It was a halloween extra for AToS, and it was rushed and forced and yeah, not super proud of it.

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years?

With more novels under my belt and hopefully a steady-ish income coming from writing. Cause hopefully one day it can become my full-time job and I’ll be able to support myself off it.

31. What’s the easiest part about writing?

Coming up with plot points/scenes. It's super easy for me to think/write plot points, it's just connecting them together that gets a little challenging.

32. What is the hardest part about writing?

Keeping track of subtle actions. Like a character talking while holding a cup in their hand and then a page later the cup magically disappears cause I forgot I gave them a damn cup.

33. Why do you write?

Because I love it, and I'm good with written words. My oral communication skills suck, and it's frustrating to struggle with getting my thoughts to come out of my mouth properly and cohesively. But writing lets me say exactly what I want to and portray it in a desired way. Also I'm a deeply emotional person and exploring emotions through characters and stories helps to sort through my own and is my main coping mechanism for dealing with life.

#tagged #morgan shut up #this was fun #so if you're a writer and wanna do it consider yourself tagged

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sshbpodcast · 7 years

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Tales from the Holodeck: TOS Fanfic: Ames’s Story

A Star to Steer Her By celebrated getting through all of Star Trek: The Original Series by writing our own TOS fanfic series “Tales from the Holodeck”! We each picked two crew members and two special guests and did pretty much whatever we wanted. You can listen to the fanfic in the podcast episode, but here’s Ames’s short story in written form. Enjoy!

“Sentient Life”

by Ames

Random Picks: Spock, Chekov, Yeoman Martha Landon, a sentient cloud

I can only tell this story in hindsight because the details have fallen into place in a most unsettling way. I reflect upon it often. My world is destroyed. I do not mean that literally; it is still here – a planet called Palochka – but everything I know about it is in shambles. I apologize, language is a new phenomenon to me. Let me begin with when the strangers arrived out of literally nowhere and changed everything forever.

"Captain's log," said their leader, a corporeal being I am compelled to call strikingly handsome though I do not entirely understand why. "The reports of the beings on the planet's surface are correct. They are ravaging the machinery, and chief engineer Scott says the unmanned stations require extensive repairs. I am assigning an away team to study the creatures and determine preventative measures to keep them from interfering with the stations."

I have never considered myself a "being" or a "creature" before. I have never considered myself an anything before. The fleshy beings moved among us, pointing instruments this way and that and talking quietly among themselves. A particularly solid-looking individual approached the leader and simply said, "Fascinating." I would eventually learn his name was Commander Spock, and whenever I think of him, conflicted feelings torment my memories. I think "blue" because that was the color of his shirt. I think "cold" because that was the temperature of the air that lapped gently at the bristling hairs on his neck. I think "smooth" because that was the quality of his voice that undulated like a silk ribbon on a soft breeze. But I get ahead of myself.

"Tricorder readings are consistent with the reports, Captain," crooned Spock to the leader of the newcomers, whose name would turn out to be James Kirk. "The beings are advanced lifeforms, though we are unable to communicate with them."

My form still surprises me: shapeless, like a puff of slithering smoke with a mind. The energy of our cloudy bodies had caused the stations on this barren planet to cease functioning. We didn't mean it; we didn't even know! The crew members discussed ways to alleviate the problem for a long time, but a hard-featured man with a rolling voice, whom the others called Scotty, dismissed each for technical reasons the others were not immediately aware of.

"Perhaps we just get rid of the cloud beings?" suggested a short, round-faced crewman with a thick accent, Pavel Chekov. When I think back on Ensign Chekov, the images that come to mind are very different. I think "gold," which it turns out looks very different from blue. I think "hot" because his moist palms clenched together with heat in them. And I think "lust" because Yeoman Martha Landon was nearby.

I know nothing about beauty except that Martha Landon was beautiful, with smooth blond hair arranged neatly in an updo, sapphire eyes, and a restless quality about her like a snake about to molt. She approached the group with her own device pointed at me and my people, a look of incredulity on her face. "But these are advanced beings. That's what you said. If this is a society of intelligent beings, then the Prime Directive clearly states that we not interfere with them." When I remember her, I recall a warmth I cannot place. Perhaps that is how beings respond to beauty.

Kirk smiled in a practiced way both fatherly and patronizing. "That's a very good point, Yeoman, but this station predates the Prime Directive, so perhaps we should just bypass the formalities."

"Shall I contact Starfleet Command and request their thoughts on the subject? I'm sure they can determine whether the Prime Directive applies." There was something forceful in her words though she spoke them as plainly as usual. Perhaps it was in her expression, that powerful something that stood up to authority. She instantly became even more attractive.

The captain's expression fell to a mildly stunned wince, though he tried to hide it under his words. "No need for that. I suppose we can do this one by the books after all."

"That was very impressive, Martha. Very diplomatic of you," said Chekov, mispronouncing the V's in his speech. The sexual tension between the two young crew members pulled him involuntarily close to the yeoman. Close enough to brush against her shoulder. Close enough to put his arm around the small of her back.

"Thank you, Pav," she said and cast a look down at the ground in what could either have been shyness or embarrassment.

Kirk cleared his throat. "Chekov, Miss Landon, would you be so kind as to capture one of the beings so Spock can run more tests. If it's as intelligent as you say, I'd like to try to reason with it. Maybe we can work something out." After sharing a meaningful glance with Spock, the captain and the first officer walked away.

"Did I tell you that Palochka was settled as a Russian station, Martha?" Chekov asked, palms growing warmer. The rest of their exchange does not exist in my memory. Suffice it to say they succeeded in encasing me in a containment device.

I shall not bore you with the hours of tests that Spock and the chief medical officer, a charming doctor called McCoy with a voice like melting butter, performed on me as I was not aware of them. Members of my kind contain no sensory organs. We neither hear nor see nor feel nor perceive the sensations of any of the countless organs that constitute other lifeforms. These beings did not even exist to me. Nothing did. Nothing ever had. The doctor crossed his arms, clenched his jaw, and turned his attention abruptly to his counterpart. "It's impossible! The things are simply not sentient beings. They're only mindless clouds and we should deal with them and be on our way instead of wasting more of our time here."

Spock, while trying to appear unvexed, betrayed an expression of irritation in his sharp, jagged features. "There is a difference, Doctor, between sentience and sapience. It is still quite possible that the lifeforms contain marked intelligence, as the sensors indicate."

From the doorway where he and Landon idled, Chekov asked, "There is no way to get through to them?"

McCoy paced, his agitation displaying itself with each tense step. "We've tried everything. Extreme temperatures, UV light, radiation, a veritable torture chamber of effects; they haven't caused any reaction in the slightest."

"What about phasers?" Chekov took out a device and shot a beam of phased energy that whizzed straight through the wisps of my cloudlike form, and smashed a glass jar behind me which scattered shards all around. Landon screamed.

"Pav! What are you doing?" the yeoman shrieked, fire in her blue eyes. "That could have killed it!"

"What's the problem? There was no harm done."

"You didn't know that when you shot it! Do you ever think before you do a thing?"

McCoy and Spock both looked on with eyebrows knowingly raised.

Flustered, Chekov continued, "But Martha, Mister Spock says the creature can't even feel anything. It probably doesn't even have the ability to think!"

"That is unconfirmed, Ensign," Spock imparted. "In fact, I am reminded of an old earth thought experiment known as the floating man theory, established by your philosopher Avicenna. You first imagine a being floating in a void, who cannot perceive external phenomena, not even itself, using any sense organs. Then imagine if said being can be aware of its own existence."

"I… I can't!" exclaimed Chekov. Most minds are not made for these kinds of thoughts. Spock's, however, proved to be the most advanced of them, as I was about to learn.

"Precisely. Perhaps we shall find that out now."

McCoy fidgeted anxiously. "What are you getting at, Spock?"

"I shall attempt to establish the Vulcan mindmeld with the lifeform, Doctor, and if there is any evidence of intelligence, I shall be able to communicate it." Something began to stir, like raindrops hitting the surface of a pool of water. From my containment field, I could discern tactility for the first time, and it simultaneously stabbed through me like teeth plunging into flesh and caressed me like cotton cloth. The fact that I almost immediately understood these sensations caught me off guard, and I later attributed this to the man who opened my nonexistent eyes to everything within the world. From nothing to literally everything. If I could cry out, I would have.

I started to see as Spock could see; it overwhelmed me but I could not turn it off. I sensed hunger and pain and a strange, deep sadness that stemmed either from myself or from the pointed-eared man who was delving deep into my consciousness, searching for something. And more than that: knowledge, memories, restrained emotions, a sense of wonderment that seemed to contain universes, and all the other connections which occur in the developed brain to make reasoning possible, all turned on as easily as flicking a switch.

Spock seemed just as perplexed with what he encountered in my cloud mind. I could see myself from his point of view, watched myself wince and change color, and I wondered if that was how I always appeared. The change became a mass of sentience that waterfalled on me, battering me down and down. I am no judge, but it felt as if the pain went on for eons.

"Remarkable," said Spock, in awe. "It is self aware, if nothing else. It does contain intelligence."

"What is it saying, Spock?" asked Captain Kirk. I do not know when he had entered the lab. "Do you think you can get the creatures to avoid the machinery on the planet?"

"Negative, Captain. Their lack of senses make them intrinsically unaware of their surroundings. They have no control over their effects on the stations." My mind was reeling nauseatingly and I wondered how aware Spock was of what he was doing to me, what I was becoming.

Chekov came closer to me then. "There must be some way we can give them the ability. Mister Spock, what if you constructed some kind of instrument?"

"No!" Landon exclaimed. "You've done your tests. You've learned that they are intelligent beings; they just think differently from us. Captain! Does this not indicate that we must enforce the Prime Directive and leave them alone?"

The rest of the room quieted to an airy stillness, and attention directed en mass to the captain. Kirk's look softened before becoming quite chipper. "Very good, Yeoman. You are, of course, most correct, and appreciated as our moral backbone in this matter. You've done quite well."

She approached him. "Captain, with your recommendation, I think I would like to return to Starfleet Academy, and refocus my position to a more diplomatic one. It seems to me that diplomacy is a skill that could use more representation among Starfleet officers."

Chekov's hurt feelings came out in a pitiable "Martha?"

"Pav, this could be a unique opportunity for me," Landon insisted, though her satisfaction highlighted her soft features and a rare smile appeared on her face. I shared in this proud moment for the respectable yeoman. The logic of her words came filtered through the mindmeld which began to fade as the science officer started to recuperate from his journey into my consciousness.

The captain made a final log entry, deeming it necessary to return me to the surface, dismantle the unmanned station, and let my race control the planet despite our ignorance of its very existence. Perhaps one day, they mused, we would evolve into something greater, organize our communities, and set off on a path into the glittering stars as well.

I could sense the crew members beginning to disperse, even Spock who moved further and further away until I was left literally senseless again, but the memories linger horribly still. Every moment, I am aware of all I cannot perceive, and the knowledge haunts me. None know this, for I cannot communicate it and my species cannot hear it anyway. Lord Byron once said, as I found written in Spock's mind during our intimate moment together, "The great art of life is sensation, to feel that we exist, even in pain." I have thus become an artist of invisible works, changed forever by one casual encounter; a sentient being among the clouds.

That’s quite enough of that. Check back here for Chris, Caitlin, and Jake’s stories, keep listening to the podcast, and follow A Star to Steer Her By on Facebook and Twitter. Be sure to tip your yeoman!

#star trek #star trek TOS #fanfic #spock #pavel chekov #sentience #yeoman martha landon #sentient cloud #podcast

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