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#by next week i should be able to eat again like normal. im going to die before then i fear
pixelyssa · 1 day
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Bye I am acc desperate atp I need helpppp
Basically I go on holidays mid July and I just know the food will be so tempting (and I’m so scared of letting myself go) and my family will obvs notice if I don’t have anything but I also want to have a nice time 😭 what do I doooo??!!
And even if i eat small amounts of things I’ve no clue how many c@ls would be in them
I will be so so grateful for any tips or advice u have!! 💓
ily stay safe bb 🩵
hey! if i was in this situation i would just heavily r3strict for the week before. that way the vacation will be like a reward. ofc thats probably not good to advise you to do 😭
maybe instead of that, you can up your workouts and make sure all of ur meals/snacks are nutritional (get ur proteins and ur veggies) vs f00ds with just sugar and sodium. and that can help u have the energy to up ur workouts too.
u said you might “let urself go” no honey, its not a choice… its brain chemistry. if ur thinking about the f00d ur gonna be having over a month from now… youre in deep. you won’t “let yourself go”. youll be anxious either way. youre not gonns get used to e@ting normal and then just stick with it, even if h do youll slowly become obsessed with ur image again soon and go back to ur ways.. thats the fuck of it all… might as well ENJOY ur vacay.
it would rlly suck to go in vacation and be trying to guess the c4lories in everything, and ordering what u think is the lightest option. you should e@t what you want.
you can still r3strict certain f00d groups. if i was going on vacay with my family theyd buy snacks for the hotel or wherever we’d be staying. i would avoid those, bc i would normally avoid them at home.
going out to restaurants id do the same thing i do at home when i go to restaurants, order something that sounds good so i can enjoy myself, whether its a salad or a big mf burger lol. and i eat till im full. (if u dont have that sense, leaving 1/2 or 1/4 of the meal on the plate is a good measurement.)
if theres an appetizer, i have maybe a bite of each one and say im saving room for dinner, (my family and friends know i get full easily) & same goes with dessert. if it looks rlly good ill have a bite, but since i ordered what i WANTED for dinner, im satisfied before a dessert comes out and i play it off that im full.
i would probably figure out what we’re doing for food and decide what is most worth it to me and save my c4ls for that.
id also make a list of things i wanna enjoy. for example: my trip to nyc i wanted to try
-new york pizza
-a pastry and latte from the cafe next to my hotel
-a martini
-something fried from a food truck
-any non american food restaurant (italian, french, idk)
-a croissant from this popular cafe in times square
and i just kinda rationed it out. i remember my bf wanted to go for a walk, i new we’d pass the bakery, so i pointed it out and indulged there. got a matcha tea and a macaroon & then played off being full until dinner and chose something light (i think i made us get sushi that night which is pretty low in c4l) another day, we took the metro to soho and we walked around ALL day, so by the time we got back to the hotel it was late. we ordered the pizza i wanted to try… and i didnt care bc i had 20k steps done. i was still able to have everything i wanted the whole time, i just r3strictied the things that werent on my list.
idk what kind of vacation ur going on but a lot of them call for lots of walking, so thats a plus. you will not g4in that much. thats why i said id go crazy a week before, so that i dont feel like im g4ining it just feels like its fluctuating normally.
either way if u let urself enjoy it atleast ur metabolism will get faster! (im toxic) lol metab week(s?) ❕
me and my bf are planning a 2 week trip to europe. 2 weeks before we go i would push myself to burn way more c4l than normal. and i wouldn’t w3igh myself in that time. in 2 weeks i could lose like 4Ibs and not even know, that way when i get back from vacation and ive g4ined 3Ibs i wouldnt even notice. then life goes back to normal!
i hope that makes sense, and i hope its not too much. i really hope u enjoy ur vacation & can allow urself to enjoy a few of the f00ds wherever ur going. 🩷
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bunnihearted · 6 months
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📖🖊❄️
#journal dump bc i have too much on my mind#1) i HATE my neighbors. theres never one quiet moment. they stomp around and slam cabinets all the time it feels like#2) ​i've been reading more recently even if concentration's hard bc of noise. but i also feel like there r too many books i wanna read#but yeah. too little time. so instead i cant settle on a book and kinda dont even read as much as i want to. a stupid problem really#3) it's crazy to say but i wish i had a part time job. sitting at home 24/7 for 5/6 years has been SO terrible for me.#everything feels meaningless. every day is the exact same. im not LIVING. im rotting away and all my issues get worse. im also so fkn bored#and i dont wanna sit at home and do assignments (even if thats what i technically should be doing)#i want a job to go to which takes me away from home + gives me money#then i can come home and sit and rot and ENJOY it. bc now my lazy time is only smth negative and bad for me :/#ofc i hate the mere thought of having some soul sucking utterly pointless job and our capitalist society is a slave hellhole. but.. as it is#im not even able to enjoy ANY of my time bc all my time feels bad. plus im only getting poorer and poorer so i cant afford to buy anything#4) im so fkn bored and going crazy from eating the exact same food every single day for the third month now. im sick of it#everything tastes so bland and disgusting. it's genuinely making me depressed 😭 i wanna eat REAL food. im so tired bc no nutrition :((#i cant do anything except wait for my appt w the doctor next week and hope they put me on a waiting list for surgery.. but ong im sick of it#5) i miss my sisters :/ we live in the same apartment but its like i've completely ceased to exist to them#except when they need to be passive aggressive to me. lol. i miss them. but they just dont wanna talk to me :/#but tbh. most of all... i just want my health issue to be over so my body can function normally again.#i can face anything in life if i can come home to a cup of coffee nd some chocolate ^-^ <333
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scalpelsister · 8 months
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my mouth. is swollen. 😭
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queenofsimpsblog · 1 year
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insecure - shuri x reader
A/N: YALL IM SO SORRY IVE BEEN MIA LIFE IS SUPER HECTIC RN BUT I GOT THIS IDEA SO
kinda wrote this for myself cuz self confidence is smth I’ve struggled with my entire life lol
shoutout to the plus sized girlies, we all gorgeous and deserve to feel like it <3
also just in case you forgot, you’re very pretty and i love you <3
@locoforshuri you alr knew i was gonna tag you <3
you gasped as the air was leaking in and out of your lungs. you trudged on the pathway while shuri was way ahead of you. you convinced her to take you for a run today, and regretted your decision moments after. shuri was easily able to run laps around the park while you felt like someone kicked you in the stomach repeatedly.
“so then i told okoye that maybe she should consider wearing something different so that riri wouldn’t—” shuri spoke and turned to look at you, but then stopped running when she realised you weren’t right next to her.
“over here!” you wheezed out from way behind her. you normally exercised but you did pilates and yoga. you hated anything related to cardio, especially running.
“sthandwa? are you okay?” she asked you and you managed to shoot her a smile, which soon turned into a groan. shuri sighed and turned back, squatting slightly and gesturing you to get on her back. you did as you were told and got on, gripping onto shuri’s shoulders so that you wouldn’t fall. she got back up and started jogging again. bast bless her new found strength. she resumed her rant about riri and okoye, but you found yourself zoning out.
the reason why you were exerting yourself so much was pretty simple. there was a big gala coming up in a few weeks, and you wanted to look your best for it. the last one was about 6 months ago, and you didn’t exactly have the best experience there.
*flashback brought to you by shuri’s smile which is SO CUTE*
it was a crisp autumn night, and the ballroom the gala was being held in was packed. people were roaming around, socialising, forcing themselves to laugh at some old white guy’s joke, drinking, eating, dancing. you and shuri looped your arms together as you went to talk to some UN members you recognised and were on good terms with.
you excused yourself to go to the bathroom, and while you were in the stall, you overheard some girls talking.
“did you see that girl with queen shuri?”
“oh yeah, what about her?”
“her outfit? eeeks, she way too big for a dress like that.”
“oh my god, yeah. i don’t get why she thought it was a good idea.”
“seriously! what is the queen doing with her? she should be with me instead.”
the girls laughed and left the bathroom. you left the cubicle and took a good look at your reflection.
your heart broke as you looked at the way your dress accentuated your body. those girls were right. you took some tissues and used them to soak up the tears so that it wouldn’t spoil your makeup. sighing to yourself, you left the bathroom to go find shuri.
*flashback over*
soon enough, shuri decided to end her run and walked back to the palace to take a shower. she set you down gently as you reached the palace doors, and made your way to your shared quarters.
“you mind if i shower first?” shuri asked you as you entered your room. “no sweetie, go ahead,” she smiled and kissed you, letting her lips linger on yours for a moment before grabbing a sports bra and boxers and retreating to the bathroom.
you stood by the large mirror in the walk-in closet, taking a good look at your reflection. your hands moved from your face, to your arms, to your belly and down to your thighs. your body was beautiful, but you couldn’t see that. all you could see was the imperfections those women commented on that night.
you hated it.
you hated how those strangers words had so much power over you.
before you knew it, the tears started coming in and you tried desperately to hold in your sobs. but you failed, and as shuri walked out of the bathroom and made her way to the closet to find an outfit to wear, she saw you staring at yourself and sobbing uncontrollably.
“hey, hey, what’s wrong?” she asked you gently, wrapping her arms to stabilise you and calm you.
“i’m ugly,” you cried out.
shuri was taken aback. she didn’t know what to say. she always thought of you as the most beautiful moment she ever laid eyes on. and it pained her to see you like this.
“no you’re not. you’re beautiful. why do you think you’re ugly?”
you were still crying, so it took you a couple minutes to pull yourself together. you told shuri about what happened at the last gala. rage filled her eyes, but it was quickly replaced with love.
“usana, what those women said is not true. not even close. you are the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen,” she gently took your hand and kissed every one of your knuckles, before moving to your palm.
“you remember when we first met?” she asked, trialing kisses along your arm and collarbone before moving to your other arm.
she giggled softly at the memory. “it was like time froze when i saw you. i could’ve sworn i heard violins playing in the background. it was like a movie scene. i knew then and there that i wanted to spend the rest of my life with you by my side,”
she then planted kisses on your belly, making you smile. “i don’t get why you think being skinny means being beautiful. beauty is so much more than that. beauty means having a good soul. a caring heart. and you have that, sthandwa,”
shuri then moved downwards to your thighs. she kissed them both and then looked up at you. “you’re gorgeous, y/n. please don’t ever say that you aren’t.” she stood up and brought your body closer to hers.
“and i love you. my heart is yours, always and forever,” she kissed you with so much love and adoration.
“i love you too,” you whispered and smiled, before kissing her again.
fuck those girls that talked shit about you. they were just jealous cuz shuri loved you, and not them. and nothing would change that.
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Personal rant or some shit bc i just wanna get this out rn. yeeeee this will be long
So today i had a vit of a stressful day with uni n all bc ive been sick and admittedly lazy over the last week up til like tuesday and i had to turn in an Interpretation/essay tonight and prepare a group presentation for tmr (saturday seminars should b illegal but ok i literally chose this). N e way so ive been procrastinating like hell up until this morning so i didnt rly eat before showing up to seminar at 12am and afterwards i had to check with my one remaining presentation groupmember and finish the interpretation and tgen i had swordfighting class at 5. I didnt Really gave time for it but its fun and im very behind bc i misses several lessons already and am generally. Not good at it lol. n e way i turn up to swords and we peactice some routines ig and heres where the peoblem rly starts. Basically i am a huge crybaby, always have been (im older than firestar btw for context), esp when i feel criticized or yknow. Make mistakes or anything and since i was a sports h8er with 2 left feet n hands all my life n cried often during school pe bc i kept messing up n git embarrassed, it was an important step for me to sign up for this uni extracurricular swords class bc. Doing sth sporty in front of others tgat. Isnt very easy and i gotta learn from scratch is a bit out of my comfort zone. But normally its all v fun, im not good/easily the worst in class but thats ok i learn and move my body and talk to ppl! Proud of myself! Well today not so kuch, i noticed i was getting tense bc of not understanding how to do a movement and everyone (3 experienced fighters bc the main teacher was sick plus 2 other beginners that r learning faster than me) lookimg at me and trying to give helpful pointers and me still doing it wrong... H8 dis feeling bc i kinda freeze up instead of being able to take the tips n try again. Its hard for me to translate input like verbal instructions and demonstsations into my own movements as is. In this state i cant do anything properly and i feel the cryings abt to start while wanting nothing more than to MOVE ON NORMALLY. Well my eye started to get itxhy n teary so i excused myself to "take care of my contacts" (lie) (why am i even so ashamed that i feel i have to lie/make up excuses?? Bro???? That just made the situation Actually cringe?????? Im normally not an ashamed person and cryings just a state/expression but idk) so it was better for a bit until it wasnt. Then i full on cried in class while 2 ppl were actively showing me things/helping me do em right n everyone else kimda watched, kimda practiced. They did ask if i was ok and i said yes like a liar. So at the end of class i normally take the bus home with one of the other new guys but i today just didnt feel able to keep talking to him. So he also asked if i was ok/why i cried and i said i just do that under stress and why i am stressed (uni) so that was also a bit of a lie but only kinda. I said i was gonna go to the livrary instead (another lie, was gonna call my bf to calm me down abit n then take the next bus) so i did tgat n it kinda worked and this genius asked if i had eaten. Bruhhh of fuckin course im sensitive ive only had 3 baked goods all day and hadnt even noticed!!!!!! So then it all made sense, mans gotta get some freakin noursishment to keep their composure in swords class! So i went to another bus stop than normally bc i needed sth from the store and bruh the guy i normally take a DIFFERENT bus with is there (awkwardly votta tell hik i changed my mimd abt the library) and we talk a bit (i feel like i talk to him wayy too much in comparison to him, like we dont know each other that well at all, idek his real name and yknow. If he actually enjoys talking to me) and yea
So now everyone in the 14th century peasant larp class knows my terrible terrible secret:))):)
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eggsupsidesunny · 2 years
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I was told its normal.
It happens to everyone, everyone experiences it, its nothing special. Nothing out of the ordinary.
Its normal to feel that way.
When I’d wake up in the morning, sick to my stomach, the urge to rush to the bathroom bogged down only by sleepiness, I thought “its normal”. Everyone gets sick sometimes.
Maybe I should stop eating before bed - everyone says thats how they wake up sick in the mornings.
When I’d come home after a normal day, too exhausted to get anything else done, putting off other responsibilities for later - for when I was more awake - I thought “its normal”. Everyone gets tired sometimes.
I should probably work on organizing my schedule better. I hear time blocking works well. That way I can get my work done before I’m tired at night.
When I’d skip necessities in favor of a hobby, or watching tv, or taking a nap, I thought “its normal”. I’m being lazy, I can get to work whenever I want.
It took a long time to realize how not-normal it was.
It wasnt normal to wake up ill every morning, and stay that way through varying levels all day. It wasnt normal to have no appetite, and be repulsed by the mere idea of certain foods - only able to eat whatever sounded good in that moment. It wasnt normal to feel like every inch of me was lead every day, to spend 2 hours in the real world and feel so exhausted i could go home and sleep for a week. It wasnt normal to have no energy to do the simplest tasks, and fall behind on everything.
Then again, being sick isnt “normal”.
Even after realizing, I had to wake up in the mornings and pretend like everything was fine, like everything was normal.
I had to go through my day, expending energy from days, weeks, months into the future just to get through the few hours I was out, pretending Im fine the whole while, acting like every word wasnt exhausting.
I had to get everything done, spending four times as much time as the next person just to get the basics done, to be at a level that everyone else gets to be at normally.
Every action I do takes 10 preparation or reparation actions. My energy is depleted at three times the speed of the average person - by the middle of the day I wish I could pass out for the rest of eternity and never have to go through that again. When I have deadlines to meet, assignments to do, I have to spend much more time and brain power, and in turn energy.
My normal is a bad, bad day for somebody else.
My normal is somebody else staying home sick, sleeping it off so they can return at 100%, or going to the hospital.
I get tired, i get exhausted, i get done with it all. I get angry and upset cause it isnt fair.
I dont get options. I live with what I get, or I dont at all. I learn to force my body to keep up with the expectations around me or face the repercussions, though im facing the physical repercussions in private every night anyways.
Living with chronic illness is frustrating and it hurts. Its exhausting and its painful and its so misunderstood that you dont even realize how your struggles arent normal until someone truly looks at you rather than brushing you away.
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alpharossi · 3 years
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.
#it just hit me that ill never be able to be as happy as i was unless something changes#ill always have to be worried...almost panicking....just waiting for the next time...feels like im constantly running from it#and it catches me only to let me go to run again and the cycle just keeps continuing#was looking through my snap memories and saw a picture of me on what i remember as one of the happiest days of my life in October#i just remember the thoughts in my head that day and just how happy i was and how genuine my smile was#and how ill never be able to have that again bc that bit of worry will ALWAYS be right in the back of my head#will i ever feel free again#will i ever be able to experience true joy without it being there following me like a shadow#i want to be happy so badly i should be so happy why did it have to be like this#i feel so bad bc i should be happy its sunny and despite the circumstances im doing well personally :)#this is killing me#tw negative#its like when things are going good im like okay this is nice im back to normal and for a week or two its nice and im happy again#but when its bad i cant eat without feeling sick and i cant focus and everything just feels blurry and spaced out#and i cant sleep some nights bc i just cant stop shaking and my chest feels so tight it hurts#i cant keep living in this cycle i know it but i dont know what to do bc there is nothing i can feasibly do to make it stop#anyway i sincerely hope none of you read this far but if you did please have a good day and i love you :)#personal delete later
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taro-im · 3 years
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when he throws his wedding ring on the floor
ANGST to fluff
warnings: language
oikawa x reader
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“Seriously Tooru! You can’t just come home 2 in the fucking morning without any texts or calls to tell me your okay!” You said in the brink of tears yelling at your husband who just came home from a party drunk
“y/n what the fuck I just came home and your already bitching at me?” “W-what? Tooru I thought you were in a car accident you don’t want me to worry?! Even worse I thought you were dead!” You said yelling “enough y/n! Your so god damn annoying sometimes I need space from you and your whole family!” He said voice louder that you almost backed down “excuse me?” “Yeah that’s right y/n, your whole family and you are so god damn annoying, your father expects me to be working a normal office job, your mother always coming over uninvited without a phone call and most of all YOU always so damn annoying texting me during practice, calling me way too many times!-“ “Tooru-“ “NO YOU BETTER NOT CUT ME OFF Y/N” he said catching a breath glaring at you while your just in shock at what’s coming out of his mouth… “you know what I regret most y/n?” He said walking closer to you while you were taking a few steps back “come on tell me y/n what do you think I hate and despise the most” he said bitterly laughing “I-I don’t know Tooru!” You said crying “I regret moving back to Japan and marrying you” he said throwing his wedding ring on the kitchen floor… “yeah that’s it I finally said it!” He said massaging his temples while your just witnessing at what he just did… he threw the ring he made vows with you, he threw the ring him and you went through store to store to find the “perfect” one, he threw the ring that was a symbol of your two year marriage… “where are you going y/n too scared to hear the truth?” He said while you were walking away eyes wide open tears trickling down your face trying to control your breathing so you weren’t a sobbing mess, you went into the guest bedroom sitting on the floor painfully looking at your left ring finger seeing the diamond shining beautifully “I didn’t ask you to come back to Japan” You said in a broken sob muffling your cries so he couldn’t hear, you weren’t able to sleep that night replaying his words over and over again, your head playing with you thinking that your the one at fault but you were right… even when Oikawa started settling what he said in his thick skull he knew what he did was more than wrong…
now the next morning you woke up with the most puffiest eyes you’ve had, you didn’t have the energy of dressing up or taking a shower and going to work but you had to, and you remember Oikawa and you go to your jobs at the same time in the morning, “hey yumi im going to be 30 minutes late sorry” you said clearing your voice so you didn’t sound like you were crying “of course y/n don’t worry I’ll cover for you girly” she said then you hanged up the phone, “babe- your going to be late” he said waking up next to nothing, maybe you already left for work till he heard some noise from a distance “y/n… you there?” He said going towards the second bedroom only for him to hear the noice stop “y/n your going to be late if you stay here longer…” “y/n?” He said sitting by the doorway trying to hear what’s happening “I’m going to go to practice but remember to go to work… love you” he said heart slightly throbbing, regretting what he did last night… if he was being honest he did regret coming back to Japan but the part about marrying you? He would never regret it he loves everything about you and what he said last night he wish he could of shutted his mouth up and he most of all hated the fact he threw his wedding ring on the floor… he went into the kitchen and saw the ring at its exact same spot picking it up made him feel more guilty… you avoided your husband like a plague, eating takeout and leaving his order you chose for him on the kitchen table, waking up early to take a shower and head off to work, locking yourself in the guest bedroom during days he was home, till the second week of avoiding him you were cleaning the house and he sneaked up from behind you “hey love…” he said hugging you from behind “hm?” “What do you mean hm? Don’t you miss me” he said trying to lighten up the mood only for you to get out of his grasp “y/n wait!” He said grabbing your hand only to see your not wearing your wedding ring “why aren’t you wearing your ring baby?” He said heart slightly in pain “I was cleaning the house I didn’t want it to- scratch” you said coming up with a lie so you could get out of the room “y/n you can’t scratch a ring by cleaning” “can you let go of me now Tooru? I really need to clean the living room” “it’s already clean” “well can you please get out I feel uncomfortable” you said hand shaking “y/n… I didn’t mean to I love you so much” he said eyes watery “I know you didn’t mean it Tooru, just leave me alone for now?” “but y/n…” “what?” “I didn’t mean what I said last week, I love you so much, your the best thing to ever happen to me- I love your family and I don’t regret moving back” he said pulling you in a hug from behind “Tooru… you can’t lie to yourself, I can’t keep you here you need to go back to Argentina” you said holding in tears”what do you mean y/n?” “I mean it’s time for you to go, I can’t be the one ruining your dreams, you’ve been planning this since hjghschool I can’t keep you here” your voice cracked slightly tears trickling down both of your faces “I’m already happy here”he said guilty “I know your lying Tooru… let’s have a little break from each other we both know we can’t be holding each other down from our separate d-dreams” you said holding in your sob while he was crying into your back “y-you can’t say that , do you know how much I love you?” He said sniffling turning you his way so you could look the brunette in his teary eyes “I know Tooru but we can’t be doing this to each other” you said crying in his chest “y/n… I’m really sorry you know that? I love you” he said kissing your forehead “I love you too you idiot” you said hitting his chest crying harder…
“I’ll see you later Tooru” you said holding in your tears and sad voice seeing off your husband at the airport… “bye love, I’ll call you when I’m in the airplane” he said walking towards you giving you a long hug “yeah… bye Tooru have a safe trip” you said hugging him tighter “you know you should write me letters since we’re going to be over a thousand miles apart” you said trying to lighten the mood kissing his forehead “yeah I’ll do that y/n…” “well good bye” you said getting out of his embrace now waving him goodbye…
4 years later:
“He should be here soon” Iwaizumi said eyebrows furrowed looking at his phone for the time “yeah he should be here already” you said anxious looking at your makeup to see if it looked smudge only to feel calloused hands covering your eyes “guess who” the familiar voice but now deeper said almost laughing “who’s this? I don’t know who you are” you said jokingly “you don’t remember your husband?” He said turning you his way cupping your face “Tooru!” You said jumping into his arms giving him a kiss on the cheek “I miss you y/n” he said in a big smile can’t helping but grinning like an idiot “I miss you too” you said touching his face looking at the man you haven’t seen in person for a long time “Iwa did you miss me?” He said hugging you by the waist coming forward “no of course not idiot now come on we’re going to be late” he said laughing “I know you missed me! Do you think you can hold my luggage? Ya know that flight was so long” he said teasing “shut up shittykawa” he said hitting his back “again with the names iwa?!”
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yaomomvs · 3 years
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TAKE OUR HAND
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seijoh x manager!reader
in which aoba johsai vbc just wants you to take their hand, just as the many times they have reached for yours when they needed it
pls i’m sorry i just wrote this for comfort, in having a terrible week and so, i just really need my seijoh boys to comfort me even if it’s just in my head and just so you know, and as i’ve been trying to convince myself, things always get better
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tuesday, [15:56 pm]
“nice kill yahaba senpai!” kindaichi congratulates his upperclassman.
his voice makes you react, it scared you. still holding your pen and the notebook you always carry around even on normal practice days, your hand threatens you in the most scary way possible.
fuck no, just... breathe.
you are quick to leave aside the notes, and so, you look around to the boys, who just after the coach’s whistle sounds they are quick to approach your spot.
you take the water bottles as quickly as you can.
“oh y/n-san, i know we are irresistible but you can’t just slack off admiring us!” makki teases you laughing.
“if our dear manager is admiring someone is obviously me” oikawa says, before taking a sip of his bottle, slightly making you blush even more.
“i don’t think she likes idiots who still watch youtube conspiracy videos at 3am”
“iwa!”
“weren’t you the one with a secret obsession for romance manga, iwaizumi?” it’s mattsun time to expose his friend. iwai mi doesn’t hesitate and he runs directly to matsukawa, while kunimi brings out his phone to start recording the chaos in the gym.
you don’t listen.
your head hurts, and then, you once again feel this weird thing in you stomach. you have been feeling like this for the past week, and you try to ignore it . but sometimes, you just want the world to stop.
you can’-
“y/n senpai?” watari calls your name, and you notice his furrowed brows looking at you, worried. you blink and correct your posture. you had just zooned out. “is everything ok?”
“ah yes watari kun!” you force your self to sound relaxed because you feel the sudden gaze of the entire team “i was just thinking in a smart way to insult oikawa, but i’m worried he won’t understand tho”
“hey! you said i was your favorite”
you fake laugh once again assuring everyone that you were just fine. the day goes on, and somehow is becomes more difficult to just stay down not worrying about anything.
and they notice.
you don’t walk home with the guys today. instead you run to the bus not before excusing yourself with an ‘urgent family thing’
“just please don’t let makki eat so much ramen today!” you giggle as you run to the bus “i’m not in the mood to dealing with diarrea!”
“that was a secret between us darling!” the pink haired guy screams cheeks blushing.
and maybe you were just too distracted, but before you face them away some of them notice how quick your smile fades.
“you know guys” yahaba is quick to say “call me crazy but, why did she lie?”
wednesday, [10:22 am]
when was the last time you actually enjoyed school? not practice, but school itself. seeing numbers everyday in the board that you don’t understand is frustrating. your throat hurts, there’s has been a not there since the begging of the day.
swallow it, y/n, dammit
you decided to take this class, don’t blame the world, blame yourself. isn’t it supposed to be simple? why isn’t it being simple? is that... 
"Square root of 57 is equal to Xo, miss" 
"alright!" 
it is not like it’s a race, you want to say. why was the teacher obsessed with speed?, it’s unfair. your time is not the same as that of others. 
you drop the pencil and you recline in your chair, why couldn’t you do operations and analysis as fast as they could? you take a look around and the eyes of others look frightening. you see ambition, you see security, you see admiration.
the bell rings and you just want to run, and well in a way you end up doing it. leaving your homeroom, you tell your friends that for today you want to be alone, the halls of aoba johsai are big, for your fortune or misfortune. you go to the vending machine and when your drink falls, the minimum noise makes you startle, lately it’s like that, small noises or actions affect you way too much.
and iwaizumi notices it.
you don’t make a single move, it’s just the cold drink resting on your hands. and before iwaizumi could stop mattsun, he was already putting his hand on your shoulder.
“y/n!”
the orange juice spills and once again fear takes hold of you.
you see them both, you’re not stupid and you know hajime stares at you weirdly, and now mattsun, you hide your fear it a bit worse than yesterday, but you do anyways.
"someday, Matsukawa-san, YOU’RE GOING TO KILL ME! and what will you do without me?" you try to say cheerful, wanting to take away the suspicion, for a moment it works.
"flunk history, that leads me to..." 
"no, sweeheart, i won’t give you my homework" 
you walk and both guys follow you, one faster than another, very naive of the situation. "I begin to believe you hate me," says Mattsun, as the three sit on a bench near the school cafeteria casually encountering kunimi who quickly joins you, patting the folds of your skirt as you sit down, you rest on the table and admire his needy expression and as the tantrum of mattsun grows.
minutes go by, your chest pain grows, but somehow you know how to let it go.
 with your hands supporting your face, lunch passes between you and kunimi, you try to talk, you really try. 
but still, your eyes just glow, and kunimi notices how it’s not the glow you always have.
thursday [12:03]
your head is spinning, you can feel the cold sweat. will this be the time? why do you feel so small? why can’t you say it?
it’s familiar, you recognize this feeling, an ocean, you’re floating, you know you can swim, but, you’re in the middle of nowhere, you look down. Out of nowhere the intimidating depth of the ocean is beneath you. And then, you sink. You feel like you’re drowning, you feel like you’re fighting the tide, but you just can’t do it.
i just need...
no, it’s not time yet, it’s still training. the boys... you’re the one who should take care of them, you’re the one who has to be be fine. they had no time to lose, they had a goal and for the moment that was the most important thing.
On that bench, your gaze is absent, you know it is so.
and through the window that overlooks your classroom, oikawa notices it too
“y/n...” he mumbled.
of course he’d noticed. at first it was not so clear, but now he remembers.
when kindaichi pinned your dark circles to him, while admiring you by fitting volleyballs in a way not of your own.
makki watches oikawa from your side, you don’t even know the pink-haired guy is there, unaware that he’s sitting next to you. but he notices. he’s been noticing for days that your eyes are threatening to close in the middle of class.
hanamaki catches your attention and instantly that mask you’ve been wearing for weeks appears again.
"hanamaki, i’m fine"
it doesn’t convince them. they both look out the window and nod.
oikawa notices, and god, he wished he had no reason to.
friday [14:00 pm]
breathe.
please just... breathe.
you’re fed up. the feeling of guilt and discomfort is still there, can’t you be calm? people don’t need to know, but why do you want to shout it?
the dressing room is alone, the girls from the soccer team are out and it’s your only chance.
the team needs you, hold on a little.
your footsteps are heard in the hallway once again, a symphony you’re tired of listening to.
your chest hurts, your heart is aching, but you just need a little more. hands are shaking, the cold in your body, you need to stop.
you have to make them stop.
but when you walk into the gym, even with your eyes down, all you feel is warm. and it’s because, the boys were standing, aligned begging for you.
no, they beg for your sake.
and everything stops.
one hand from him on your neck, and one hand around your shoulders.
because oikawa, without warning, now has you in his arms.
and then, only then, you break.
tears don’t take long to come out, along with desperate sobs. your legs fail and out of nowhere, you and oikawa are on your knees.
with an alarmed look, the whole club runs towards both, surrounding you as sensibly as possible.
"i’m sorry, i’m sorry I’M SORRY" is heard from you, between hiccups.
“love, listen...” iwaizumi approaches you,somehow he managed to catch up with you, somehow he managed to hold your hand.
"i promise i didn’t want to, but i can’t, i can’t anymore, why can’t i? i try and i try and i keep trying but it’s never enough! IM TIRED OF SEEING SOMETHING AND NOT BEING ABLE TO PROCESS IT LIKE THE OTHERS. I’M TIREDD OF NEVER FULFILLING WHAT I SHOULD”
yahaba’s heart aches, and just as most of the team, is shocked.
your hands, oh your adorable hands, those hands that bandage his in the middle of an important game, he sees them shaking horribly between iwaizumi’s.
“AND I’M SCARED, WHAT IF I LOSE YOU BECAUSE OF THAT BECAUSE OF ME? BECAUSE OF HOW I AM I-“
watari is quick to place your hair gently behind your ear, a kunimi covers you with his jacket.
“I LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND I DONT RECOGNIZE MYSELF” you lower your voice, its cracked now “oikawa I don’t recognize myself, I want to be me again" you whisper, and a knot appears in the captain’s throat, and he puts a hand on your cheek "please... just let me be me again" your throat burns, your eyes get redder.
the gym goes silent, your words still echoing in everyone’s head.
“why didn’t you-“
“i just couldn’t” you blame yourself cutting oikawa off “look at us! we are waisting time on me when we should be- i’m the one who has to- im you support not-“
“hey hey, love...” iwaizumi whispers his voice is filled with sweetness, letting you sit correctly and softly rubbing his thumb in your hands “how many times have you been there for us? y/n your hand is always there”
“that’s true” kyotani says, finally saying something, emotions overwhelmed him a lot, but he genuinely wanted to help you.
“there’s something about you, there’s light” kindaichi follows up.
“no matter where, or how bad we are, somehow you always are helping us stand up” mattsun also tries to carefully approach you, he wants nothing more for you to feel safe.
and oikawa’s arms were still around you. he never stopped.
“we have reached your hand so many times, so now it’s time for you to please take ours” oikawa holds you face, and you see the sincerity and kindness behind his brown eyes, it feels like home.
mattsun does a sign asking the coach for a day off, both of them smile tenderly at you and give the green flag. iwa and makki are next to hold you carefully helping you stand up. they help you stop shaking but it’s mad dog the one who wipes your tears away with a tissue watari handled him. still not knowing if he did it the right way. you still feel kunimi’s scent. you still see kindaichi holding your school bag making sure nothing is missing. yahaba is the one bringing you water. and oikawa still refuses to let you go.
all of them feel like home.
“thank you”
and that’s how you know everything is going to feel fine.
because this club was yours and you were theirs.
this was home.
1K notes · View notes
rommahh · 3 years
Text
I Carry Your Heart
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Harry Styles x Reader
Word Count: 4k
{Ahhhh ok so this is my first work like ever. There will definitely be a second part because ive got more to say and it needs a second part. I hope whoever sees and reads this imagine enjoys it. I appreciate comments, likes, reblogs, ideas on what could go into the story, and any form of help and redirection as to how i should write things. Much love, R.}.
Part two
All Y/N wanted tonight was to hang out with her boyfriend, eat a mass amount of junk food, and watch a marvel movie or two. That was all she wanted and that was all she asked of her boyfriend. Instead of any of that happening, she found herself sitting on the nasty kitchen island of her boyfriend's frat at a party that she was trying to avoid going to.
This party was supposedly ‘the party of the year.’ The last rager before finals and then christmas break. Y/N had spent the whole week studying and finishing up end of semester projects hence the want for a chill night. When Harry came to her saying his frat was throwing a party tonight and that he just HAD to be here, Y/N didn't feel like she had a choice but to let him go. She came because she thought this would be the only time she would be able to have some time with Harry after a long week of barely seeing each other. With two vastly different majors, the couple wasnt able to find a lot of time in the middle of school work to make time for just the two of them. Obviously her hopes of quality time with her man were futile because here she was sitting by herself in the kitchen of the frat while Harry drank and got high with his friends in other parts of the house.
Of course she was disappointed. She felt a knot in her throat and a weight on her chest just sitting there in that kitchen. Her white claw was warm now- not that it was any cold when she opened it. She was starting to form a small headache from the too loud music and the ache in her heart was growing.
She stood from the countertop on the search for her boyfriend, hoping he wasn't too far gone from sober. Wiping the back of her jeans from anything that was left on the island, she began walking around the house. She doesn't remember the last time the two of them spent time together by themselves. Of course they occasionally ate dinner together in the dining hall but they were normally surrounded by friends. Y/N wanted to be alone with her boyfriend to talk and bask in his presence.
After pushing through groups of partying humans, she found Harry and at least ten other people sitting around playing some sort of drinking game.
“Y/N! Where have you been?” Luca, one of Harry's frat brothers yelled out to her from the circle. Luca was cool, he was one of the only tolerable boys in this frat aside from Harry. Hearing his girlfriend's name, Harry turned around from where he sat on the ground and reached out for his girlfriend to sit beside him. Much to Y/N’s dismay, Harry was wasted. His eyes were half mass and his words bumped and slurred together. “We are playing truth or dare, wanna play?” Luca asked.
“I don't wanna play but Ill sit and watch.” Sitting next to her boyfriend, she grabbed one of his hands holding it in her lap. She was annoyed at him but it did her no good to show it when he was this drunk.
This game of truth or dare was childish. Dares of licking people's shoes and taking multiple shots had been done and truths about money and relationships were being spilled among the group. It had finally become Harry’s turn to do something, making Y/N tense.
“Ok Harry, I dare you to…” One drunk frat boy started looking around the room trying to come up with something clever. His eyes landed on a pretty girl in the room, Yara, a stuck up girl who for sure got her way no matter what. “I dare you to kiss the hottest girl in the room- obviously not your girlfriend because that defeats the purpose.” The frat boy smirked knowing what his intentions were. Everyone in the group giggles and gasped shocked by the dare but ready to see what was going to go down. Y/N’s brows furrowed as she became angry with the stupid dare.
The ache in her chest seemed to tip over the edge when she felt her boyfriend in the room move to stand up. She grabbed at the bottom of his shirt as a way of stopping him. Harry halted his movements to look down at his girlfriend. He giggled a little.
“You’re not actually going to do this right?” She asked Harry with wide eyes of shock. Harry laughed at her like she made a joke, making her heart hurt even more.”Harry I do not want you to do this just take the shot and lose the dare.” Her tone held warning.
“Don't be silly of course I'm going to. It's just a dare, nothing serious. Don't be so clingy.” He stood walking over to Yara and planted a wet kiss on her mouth. Yara gripped Harry’s shirt and kissed him harder. The kiss went on for a few more seconds, the room absolutely silent out of shock. Harry stepped back from Yara slightly sobering up from his actions. Yara smirked at Y/N, hand gliding down the front of Harry's shirt.
Y/N stood from the seat she was in and scoffed. Scoffed because she should've known Harry would do something like this. Scoffed because it hurt to see her boyfriend do something so careless without any regard for his girl's feelings. She pulled herself together, feeling her throat tighten once again. She was quick to leave the room and down the hall of the frat.
Harry's clumsy steps could be heard from behind her as he mumbled her name. Or at least he tried to. He was still so out of it, his words not making much sense. Y/N was crying now, the strength that she had slowly dissolving as she walked further away from her boyfriend.
“Y/N wait. P-please wait. I cant-” Harry stumbled over his legs behind her falling into the grass of the front yard. The girl couldn't help but turn around looking at her stupid boyfriend. She was choking on sobs now. She wasn't crying over a measly little kiss but over an extreme amount of burnout from school and exhaustion from simply existing. She was crying because her boyfriend ignored her boundaries, crushing and erasing the boundaries she had set in their relationship. Harry tried reaching for her once she had stopped walking. His hand clasped around her wrist, he laid his head down on her shoulder. He hated seeing her cry even if he was too drunk to see why.
“Baby don't leave, Im-Im Sorry.” He hiccuped and burped due to the alcohol. Y/N felt her rage build. Shoving Harry off of her, she crossed her arms across her chest as a way to shield herself from Harry physically. He was hurt by her distance and the wall she put up around her.
“You're an idiot Harry. An idiot!” her sobs grew louder, some stray party goers watching in amusement- some even snapchatting it for shits and giggles. “I didnt want you to kiss her and you did. What provoked you to think that was ok? All I wanted was for us to hang out tonight and just be us and you did this!” She was yelling now. Her hurt is beyond her now. Anger and rage simmered throughout her body making her head dizzy and her fingers curl within themselves. She didnt like being angry. It wasn't an emotion she liked acting on, it felt impersonal.
“Baby I don't under-” Before Harry could finish his sentence he was barfing at his feet. Y/N stepped back disgusted with her boyfriend. She couldn't even feel remorseful because of how angry she was. Luca, the frat brother from earlier, caught up with Harry and his girl only to find Harry doubled over heaving. Luca wrapped his arms around Harry's shoulders.
“I'm sorry Luca but I can't do this tonight. Can you please make sure he gets some water and goes to bed. I-I can't do it tonight, I wish I could but I can't.” Y/N didn't want to leave her boyfriend in this state but she didn't deserve this. She wasn't going to care for her drunk boyfriend when all she wanted to do was care for herself. Selfishly, she enjoyed seeing him this way because of the anger he caused her.
Luca shook his head in understandment. “Of course, I'm really sorry for tonight. He's going to seriously regret this in the morning, especially since it will be circulating all over snapchat in the morning.” Luca waved to Y/N then proceeded to pull Harry into the house. Harry called out for Y/N not wanting to be away from her but Luca pulled him harder.
Harry woke up the next morning feeling like the bottom of a dumpster. He wasn't shocked by that. He knew he got trashed last night, he had planned to. He, just like Y/N, spent all week studying and completing projects while also fulfilling certain responsibilities for his frat. He wanted one night to be a normal teen. So he drank and drank and drank and maybe even smoked some weed. As he tried to recall last night's events he came up with nothing. He didn't understand why Y/N wasn't here with him like she normally would after a party on the weekend. They were normally always together during the weekend. A bad feeling loomed over him. He could tell something wasn't right but decided to put his feelings to the side.
He saw a bottle of water beside his bed making him think she was probably here and left early. Chugging the water he started to go through his socials to see if anyone had posted about the party. He had multiple tagged pics and videos in his notifications from snapchat. Way more than he normally would.
The first video he saw was a video of him and Y/N standing in the front yard of the frat house. Turning the volume all the way up he could hear Y/N yelling, it shocked him. She doesn't normally raise her voice, especially not at him. The angle changed showing her face which was red with anger, eyes filled with unshed tears. He could hear her yelling about him kissing someone else. He felt his heart stop. He had kissed someone else? On the next snap was a picture of him keeled over vomiting on his shoes with the caption saying, ‘are yall seeing this shit?’ Harry was embarrassed but he was more concerned than anything.
His head was hurting but it didn't stop him from rolling out of bed, washing up, and putting on a fresh set of clothes. He checked his phone hoping Y/N had messaged him but nothing was there. He walked into the kitchen only to see luca sitting at the counter eating cereal.
“Hey Harry….” Luca said warily. Luca pushed the cereal around his bowl feeling the tension begin to rise in the room. He felt horrible about his friends.
“Luca...what's up?” Harry was confused by Lucas' wariness.
“So do you remember anything about last night?” Luca asked, setting his cereal down in the sink behind him. Harry started playing with the frayed edges of a bracelet Y/N made for him. It had little beads with her name on it. They made them together at an event on campus.
“I don't, I only saw the videos of Y/N screaming at me. I think I fucked up but I- I don't know what happened.” Harry's cheek flushed with even more embarrassment. Luca awkwardly chuckled scratching the back of his neck.
“You got dared to kiss the hottest girl in the room and um actually did it in front of Y/N...even though she didn't want you to. Which led you guys outside and yeah you know the rest...Im sorry dude, I wish I had stopped you.”
“Who- who did I kiss?” Harrys stomach lurched when he heard Yara’s name come out of Lucas' name. Y/N didn't like Yara and it was understandable. Yara has been pining after Harry since their first year of college. Harry couldn't breathe. He felt disgusted with himself. He could only imagine how Y/N was feeling.
Y/N woke up the same morning, eyes puffy and crusty from tears and head hurting. She probably cried herself into dehydration. She was lucky enough to have no roommate because she wouldn't have wanted someone else to see her breakdown. She still couldn't believe last night went down the way it went down. She couldn't tell if she was just being overdramatic or if her emotions were in the right place. She didn't want to be mad at Harry. He was everything to her, she had an odd connection to him. Meeting him during their freshman welcome week they quickly became best friends with a growing romantic connection in the mix. They started dating before Christmas break. They had grown close so fast that he even came home with her to meet her family for the first few days of break.  Even though they were in their junior year of college, Y/N could see them beyond college. She's imagined them getting married, travelling, sharing a home. She saw the whole future with him. She had her doubts though. He was immature just like every other boy in college. He was dumb with his actions and tended to only do things if they benefited him. He had a lot of growing to do as a person, so did she but she wanted to grow with him.
She heard a knock on her door hesitating to answer it because one, it could be Harry, and two, she looked like a wreck. Answering anyways, she was met with a very sorry looking Harry holding a small coffee and bagel from their cafe.
“Hi baby…” He sheepishly said holding out the items. She silently let him through the door not once looking him in the eye. He stepped into her room, setting her treats on her desk. He could see that her bed was messy meaning she recently woke up. Y/N never went about her day without making her bed. He turned back to her and finally their eyes met. He took in all of her facial features, from her puffy eyes, to her downturned lips that looked chapped, to her flushed cheeks that longed to be held for warmth. He hated to see her like this, the last time he saw her so upset was when her parents moved out of her childhood home. It took alot to make Y/N this upset. She was normally really headstrong and vigilant. She knew how to ease her way out of problematic situations and could talk her way through anything.
Harry opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by Y/N holding her hand up in front of his face. “Don't talk. I'm really hurt Harry, so if your plan was to come over here and apologize over bagels- think again.” She snapped, backing up to put space between the two of them. She sat down on her bed while Harry pulled the desk chair out and sat down. He much preferred to be on the bed with her holding her tight but he didn't want to overstep boundaries.
“Love, I don't know where to begin. I'm really sorry for what happened last night. I was really drunk and obviously wasn't in the right headspace.” Harry reached out and touched the tips of her fingers with his. She wanted to move but it felt good to be touched by Harry.
“I told you that a measly little apology won't do Harry. I didn't want you to kiss Yara and you did anyway. You know how Yara feels about you and you just let it happen!” She pulled her hand away remembering the prior night's events. Harry felt himself getting angry too. He felt like he needed to defend himself- even though it would be a very bad idea.
“I think you're being over dramatic.” Wrong move Harry. “It wasn't like I was making out with her!”
“You're joking right?” She scoffed and scooted further up her bed to create more distance. “Harry it's the simple fact that you did something that made me uncomfortable that shouldn't have even happened. I see myself getting married to you and it makes me worry that right now in our relationship you can't respect my boundaries!” She yelled. Harry’s eyes widened as he laughed sarcastically.
“Married? What the fuck are you on about? I'm a junior in college. In what world would it make sense for me to be prepping a relationship for marriage? Once again I think you're being over dramatic.” Her eyes watered hearing Harry's statement.
“I- I guess I'm the only one in this relationship thinking about the future? I thought we were on the same page. I'm not planning our marriage now, obviously. I'm thinking about how elements of our relationship now could play out in the future when we do want to get married. You cheated on me last night. I went to a party you begged ME to go to only to be there for you. I wanted to be here cuddling with you, pigging out on fast food but I was at a party with you and got cheated on!” Her volume rises once again, making Harry shove his chair from underneath him when he stands up.
“You're doing too much right now. I'm not planning a future right now because I don't want this future! I want to be myself without thinking about how to appease my girlfriend. I invited you to the party so you could lighten the fuck up. I love you, I do, but I'm not thinking of marriage and futures. I'm thinking about my life right now and having fun.” Harry snapped right back at her. Her chin wobbled. Obviously her and Harry were on different pages. It hurt so much to hear him say that he didn't want a future with her. Harry didn't mean it though.
“Ok, well I guess that's my fault for assuming we were thinking along the same lines. Um, I don't want to hold you back from being yourself so with that being said, you are a free man Harry.” She pushed herself up from her bed walking to the door ready to escort Harry out.
“Huh? Love, what?” Harry was confused on how they got to this point. Just a few days ago they were in love, meeting in the library to share a lunch and exchanging sweet words determined by their love.
“Listen I have a day full of exams tomorrow so if you could just leave that would be best. You don't really want this so I'm letting you go, Harry.” She had tears rolling down her face, falling from her eyes down to her chin where they fell to the ground in droplets. Harry’s eyes welled up watching his love cry before him.
“I don't-”
“Harry, leave, please.” She opened the door making room for him to go through. He walked through the door turning to look at her. She turned her face away from him whispering a small goodbye before shutting the door. Harry was left in the silent hallway, so silent he could hear his thoughts and the tears hitting the tile floor beneath him. He thinks he stood there for at least thirty more minutes before accepting what had happened and walking away.
Leaving Y/N in her room sobbing like she had never done before. Her tears coated her face and she thought her head could explode right then and there. She didn't want to accept what had happened but she had priorities. She composed herself enough to start studying for her exams.
The week rolled by quickly, Monday meeting Friday in a flash. Exams were done and Christmas break was on the horizon. Students were piling off of campus in a hurry ready to get home to their loved ones. People were outside by cars loading up their winter necessaries and saying their goodbyes to their close friends.
Harry cried everyday this week. He wasn't normally a crier. He hated crying, he hated the feeling of crying and the headache that came from it. He cried because he realized how wrong he was. He missed Y/N. He missed finals week dinner together where they tried to get off campus at least once and be alone for a moment. He missed watching her relax while eating food that wasn't from their school's cafeteria. He would pay for their meal just so she could have one less thing to worry about. They would normally get frozen yogurt right after too, Y/N getting as many toppings as she wanted because Harry would be the one paying. He missed her tight after exam hugs. She would squeeze his shoulders tight, smiling into his neck, telling him how proud she was of him. She would bring him tea in the morning when they met for breakfast. Sometimes they would spend the night in one or the others room so they could have time together to destress and just talk.
Y/N wasn't doing any better. She normally went into exam week feeling confident. She studied too hard not to. But this week she felt like shit. Her heart hurt and she kept thinking about the fight. She feels like she overreacted but hearing Harry talk about their lack of a future hurt nonetheless. She really assumed that they did have a future that included marriage and a life together. She didn't understand where his sudden lack of commitment came from. She regretted dumping him but at the same time she wished he did more to get them back together but he was silent. He hasn't contacted her at all and avoided all of their spots on campus all together.
She stood by her car prepping for her six hours car ride back home. Packing away her clothes and some essentials in the trunk of her car, she heard light footsteps behind her. Closing her trunk she turned to see Harry standing with his hands in his pockets.  
“Hi.” He said. She looked at him, putting her own hands in her pockets. It was cold outside, the nippy air hinting at a possibility of snow.
“Hi Harry.” They shared a moment of silence together. Just staring at each other. It felt good to be near each other again. They felt like they could breathe again.
“I had to see you before you left. I know the break is only a month but I didn't want to leave without seeing you.” He replied quietly. She made him feel so shy. Her beauty always made him awestruck. Even in a hoodie with their college's logo and some large sweatpants and some fuzzy crocs, she was the most beautiful thing he's ever seen.
“I don't know what to say harry.”
“It's ok. I don't deserve anything from you after what I said. I just wanted to apologize and wish you a good break before you left. I also wanted to give you this.” He pulled a small box and envelope out of the front pocket of his backpack. “I know we agreed on no presents but I think thats a dumb rule and I love you too much to not get you something.” She smiled at his words, taking the gift from his hands.
“Thank you Harry, it means a lot to me. So what are your plans for a break?” She asked him, the tension that was in the air slowly dissipating.
“I couldn't get a flight home until next wednesday so i'll stay here on campus until then.” He shrugged.
“Oh ok. Well tell Anne I said hi. I have to go Harry but I'll see you after the break, ok?” She didn't want to leave him but she didn't want to drive through the dark.
“Ok, love. Drive safe. I lov- I mean have a good break.” Her chest tightened at his hesitation. She wants to hear him say the words but she knows he won't.
“Have a good break Harry.” She whispered. Before getting in her car she stood on her toes placing a kiss on the corner of his mouth. Rubbing her thumb across his cheek and turning away and into her car.
She drove away knowing that her heart was left in that parking lot in the hands of someone she loves way too much.
Harry stood in the parking lot watching his heart drive away for winter wanting nothing more than to be with her.
Part two
412 notes · View notes
shorkbrian · 4 years
Text
Babysitter
Prelude - I do not understand how some people get turned on by spanking, but I still respect that kink. I could never lol I just think back to the days where I got spanked so hard I’d pass out or the wooden spoon would break haha.
Pairing - Bakugou Katsuki X Reader
Prompt - idk I just thought of babysitters being so flipping like “Im in charge here” and stupid and I feel like Bakugou would enjoy babysitting like someone just a few years younger than him cause he’d get such a rush of power. 
Warnings - NSFW, abuse of power, noncon, spanking, degradation, slight misogyny. slight masochism?
Music - https://open.spotify.com/track/5E30LdtzQTGqRvNd7l6kG5?si=IG4WgPeSQf2_UzyLXMWR7g
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Your mom was overbearing.
Here you were, a full-grown adult, and your mom was yelling her thanks to your “babysitter” as she rushed out the door.
You knew she was a bit protective, a bit hyper-vigilant and akin to a helicopter parent. But it was hard to be mad at her for it, not ever since dad had divorced her. She was terrified of something happening to you, of loosing the last thing in her life that she cared about. 
Still, it was hard not to feel a little bubble of irritation in your throat as you watched your “babysitter” wave to her as she climbed in her car. You didn’t need a babysitter, not at your age. And you especially didn’t need the gruff, surly man that had lived in the house across the street as your babysitter. You could take care of yourself, thank you very much.
And how come your mom didn’t trust you by yourself, but somehow trusted this Mr. Grumpypants that you had met a total of zero times. You had seen him once, when your mom’s car had broken down at her job and you had to go pick her up. 
You hadn’t minded, rolling up to the curb to see your mother animatedly talking to some blonde man with a stick shoved up his ass, his handsome face grimacing like he just sucked on a lemon dipped in hot sauce. Apparently she worked with him, the younger man a security guard for the complex her office was located in. You watched as his bored red eyes slid from your mother, over to you through the car window, his brow furrowing. The bored look had disappeared, and he regarded you with… curiosity? Contempt? It was hard to tell what emotion was hidden behind his eyes, underlaid so strongly with irritation and anger.
Mom had gushed about him all the way home, telling you details you didn’t really care about. His name was Bakugou Katsuki, he was single, 27, and wouldn’t you know - he lived right across the street!
Well, if she trusted him, you guess you should too. Didn’t mean you had to like it though.
And you didn’t, huffing as Bakugou closed the door and you turned back to your game, mashing buttons and sitting forward as you tried to beat this level.   It was ridiculous, your mom going over to his house a few days prior with a plate of cookies, asking the man if he wouldn’t mind coming and hanging out while she was away on some business trip. She had expressed her worry about leaving you - what if something happened while she was gone for a week? Someone could kidnap you and she wouldn’t even know until she got back!
Even when you politely reminded her that cell-phones existed, she was adamant; you were going to have someone big and strong stay in the house with you. It not only would keep potential burglars and thieves away, but it’d keep you safe, make sure you weren’t doing anything silly like staying up too late or eating too much junk food. It was embarrassing.
Some small part of you wanted to stomp your foot and whine at her, but that wouldn’t help you in trying to convince her that you were an adult. Once your mom convinced herself of something, nothing would be able to change her mind. Even when you pointed out that Bakugou was a strange man, she didn’t budge. 
“I see him everyday at work!” She had pointed out. “Plus, he’s a security guard sweetie - his literal job involves keeping people safe.”
Bakugou locked the door, before glancing your way. You felt his eyes on you, but you didn’t feel like acknowledging his presence, by gracing him with conversation or any sort of interaction. The man moved on after a second, walking behind you and into the kitchen. You heard him rustle in the cupboards, the clink of glasses, then the sound of water filling a cup.
Right - your mom had kindly showed him where everything was. She had guided him through each room showed him the guest room which she had made up for his stay, even walking him through the kitchen and showing him the contents of each cupboard. 
He came back into the living room with his backpack and cup full of water, settled himself down in one of the armchairs by the couch.  You didn’t spare him a glance as he pulled out his laptop, threw on some glasses, and settled himself in for… well, whatever he was doing. You were just glad that the two of you didn’t have to interact with each other.
You continued playing your game, occasionally getting frustrated enough to mumble under your breath at the TV as your character died yet again. This was going to be a long week.
----
You were taking a gap year after graduating, relaxing before you threw yourself into college and working. Right now, your days were spent playing games, scrolling on your phone and laughing at memes, going to the pool for hours on end, the library, bike rides, hikes… lots of activities that kept your mind and body occupied. But this week? Bakugou threw off every plan you made.
It was the second day, and you had gotten up early to go swim and goof off at the community pool for a few hours. It was fun, you could tan a little, cool off, maybe see some cute boys your age. 
When you got out of the water you had two missed texts from Bakugou. 
Where are you
Tell me where the fuck you went
Instead of answering, you huffed, wrapping your towel around your waist. It took maybe fifteen minutes to walk home - you’d deal with your overprotective babysitter then.
He met you at the door, throwing it open before you could even touch the handle. His face was drawn tight in a scowl, the blonde crossing his arms as soon as you stepped inside and shut the door behind you.
“Your fucking phone die? Or are you just ignoring me?”
You shook your head, irritated with how big of a deal he was making out of this. You went to the pool all the time, you weren’t going to die. “I was at the pool, chill dude.”
“Oh, I thought you just popped out to go fucking parachuting!” He spat, uncrossing his arms to gesture at your body. “I can see that you went to the pool dipshit. Why didn’t you fucking tell me, huh? You normally run off on your mom without a damn word?”
You stared at him, curious to see if he would burst a blood vessel with how worked up he was getting. He didn’t seem like someone that knew what the word “relax” meant. Bakugou probably slept all angrily, arms crossed, lips pulled into a frown, eyebrows drawn low.
“Fucking hey, earth to idiot!” Fingers snapped in front of your face, and you recoiled, glaring up at the man in front of you. Before you could open your mouth, he huffed, rubbing a hand across his forehead. “Don’t fucking go anywhere unless you run it by me, understand? I don’t need you wandering into a fucking alley and getting stabbed or some shit.”
Snorting, you moved past him, not even bothering to answer. He was an asshole. Despite what your mother thought, you weren’t a child. You knew how to take care of yourself, you didn’t need some grumpy old guy bossing you around.  Said man was grinding his teeth as he watched you walk away, headed for your room. It probably annoyed the life out of him that you hadn’t answered, but he didn’t say anything. 
When you finished grabbing clothes for your shower, you came out of your room to see Bakugou leaning against the wall. 
“So you’re being a little spoiled princess, not even talking to me? That’s rich. You know I’m gonna be here for the next fucking week - you better make peace with that.”
“Dude, I don’t know what you want. I’m fine, I do this all the time. Just leave me be, and I’ll do the same for you.”
Bakugou grumbled something under his breath, but your skin was getting dry and tight from chlorine, so you ignored him as you slipped into the bathroom, locking the door behind you. You could hear his feet stomping away, and almost giggled at the sound. It almost seemed like he was the petulant child that needed a babysitter.
It didn’t take you long to rinse off, get all the chlorine and salt off your skin. Drying off, you quickly realized you forgot a bra when you had grabbed clothes - which was fine, you would just wrap up in your towel and waddle back to your room. Plus, the bathroom was directly opposite your room, and Bakugou wasn’t nearby, you could hear dishes rattling in the kitchen, so that wouldn’t be a problem. 
And it wasn’t, not until you were in your room, door closed, towel on the floor as you rifled through your dresser drawers for the bra you really liked.
“Hey princess, do you want-“
You only heard him as he opened the door, and by that time you were scrambling to snatch your towel up around your naked body. Bakugou choked on his words, face turning a flaming red before he slammed the door shut, giving you your privacy. 
Heart racing, you sat down on the floor, too embarrassed for words. That was awkward. 
“Why the fuck would you grab clothes, only to come back and change in your room!??!” Bakugou yelled from the other side of the door, a decidedly angry “thump” from where he banged his fist against the door.
“I forgot something, geez! Why didn’t you bother knocking?!?” You yelled back, your own face heating up.
“Holy fucking shit, just get some fucking clothes on, asshole. I’m makin’ pancakes and shit.”
Breakfast was an awkward affair, your gaze focused firmly on the perfectly cooked food on your plate. Bakugou was glaring at you between bites, obviously fuming. He was probably just as embarrassed as you were, but at least he wasn’t trying to make small talk.
----
Bakugou doesn’t appreciate how much time you spend playing video games, and it’s only the third day. He’s grumbled about it several times already, but you aren’t hurting anybody, and there’s nothing else for you to do, so.
It seems like the only thing Bakugou is willing to do is sit nearby, glare at you condescendingly, and mutter under his breath about how you spend your time. When you decided to run to the store to get groceries (there was a surplus of food in the house - you just wanted some air and time away from your “babysitter”) Bakugou had suddenly appeared, moving in front of the door and sneering. 
“Are you trying to fuckin’ sneak off again? I won’t let that shit slide twice.”
You huffed, shrugging on your jacket. “Bakugou, I was going to the store. Contrary to what you think, I’m not eight years old, and I can take care of myself. My mom’s just a helicopter parent. You don’t even need to be here, honestly.”
The man scoffed, his face souring. “You’re literally a fucking child. Didn’t you just graduate highschool?”
Stepping closer to him, you squared your shoulders, eyebrows furrowing as you looked up at the blond. “Call me a child all you want - doesn’t change the fact I’m old enough to do stuff by myself. Now-“ you gestured to his body “-please move.”
“No.”
You crossed your arms over your chest. “And why not? You can’t just lock me in the house until my mom comes back.”
Bakugou’s head cocked, red eyes burrowing into your head. He grinned. “Why the fuck not? I’m in charge here, I get to make the damn rules. I say your ass stays here, and it’s going to.”
Clenching your jaw, you huffed, spinning on your heel. You weren’t going to be able to talk the bull-headed man into leaving you to your own devices. There was nothing left to do except shuck off your shoes, admitting defeat. It was so irritating - you didn’t need anyone looking after you, you were an adult! You were more than capable of handling yourself! Why didn’t your mom trust you? Did she think that you were too stupid to keep yourself alive and safe?
You left Bakugou at the door, grabbing a soda from the kitchen before flopping onto the couch in front of TV.  
Sure, you could read a book, do a puzzle, browse social media. But right now, you were feeling particularly angry, violent. You wanted to achieve something, finish quests, accomplish tasks. So video games it was.
Of course, that meant Bakugou sauntering back into the living room, groaning as he saw you back in front of the TV. But if he wasn’t going to let you go out, then this is what you were going to spend your time doing. If he wanted to treat you like a child, then you were going to act like one. Show him how much of a brat you really could be.
You turn on your console, select the game you’re going to be playing for the next few hours, and settle further into the couch, making yourself comfortable.  Reaching down to the coffee table, you’re about to grab the soda you had brought in earlier, but Bakugou beat you to it.
“Hey!” You whined, watching the blond pop the tab, take a long, slow drag of the carbonated drink. He smacked his lips and cocked his head, smirking down at you. 
“You shouldn’t drink this sorta shit, ’s bad for you.”
“Why are you drinking it then?!!?”
Bakugou shrugged. “‘Cause I’m in charge here. I get to do whatever I fuckin’ want.”
Huffing, you gave up the argument, starting to push yourself off the couch. Bakugou was one of those people that got off on power trips, liked being the one to call the shots. The best course of action here would be to just ignore him and grab another soda.
“And where the fuck do you think you’re going? I didn’t say you could move.” The blond man was standing in front of you, making it impossible for you to stand. He was so irritating - you couldn’t wait for this week to be over.
“I’m going to get something to drink, since you decided to help yourself to my soda.”
He moved out of your way, clicking his tongue before flopping down into the armchair by the couch. You glared at him for as long as you could, until the kitchen wall hid his face from view. Ugh, he was such a jerk. At first he had seemed somewhat decent, but as he got more comfortable around you, the man was turning into a self-absorbed tyrant. 
Whatever, you were only going to have a stupid “babysitter” for a few more days.
----
“Get off the damn game! Don’t make me haul your ass off that couch.” 
Bakugou threatened. He wasn’t very intimidating, standing there vigorously brushing his teeth like there was something wrong with them. The blond had already asked you two other times, and you had ignored him on both occasions. You were so close to leveling up, just a few more points.
If Bakugou wanted to go to bed when the sun was still up, he was more than welcome to do so. You however, had better things to do with your time.
You saw him stomp away out of the corner of your eye, apparently giving up on trying to tell you what to do in your own house. Good.
If anything, Bakugou should be grateful that all you were interested was playing video games and going to the pool. You could be out getting in trouble, doing drugs, rebelling against the system or something - but you were here, chilling and causing zero trouble. 
The sink in the bathroom ran, then clattering could be heard as Bakugou finished up his bedtime routine, putting his toothbrush away, washing his hands, yada yada.
He appeared back in the living room, arms crossed. His muscles bulged out like that, showcased by the sleeveless black tank top he was wearing. But you weren’t intimidated, it’s not like he was going to hit you or something.
“Alright, last chance. Turn the fucking game off, it’s your majesty’s bedtime now.” He sneered.
You ignored him.
“You seriously wanna do this princess?”
You stayed silent. Just a few more kills….
“Alright, you fuckin’ asked for it.”
The TV turned off, Bakugou yanking the cords out behind it.
“Dude, what the hell! I was so close to leveling up!!” You screeched, sitting up straight. Bakugou’s face was screwed into an angry frown, and he advanced towards you, walking with purpose. You were fuming, rising to your feet so you could get in his face, tell him off. He was acting like he was your dad or something, and he most definitely was not.
When the man got within an arm length of you, you immediately jabbed a finger into his chest, mouth opening to spit nasty words. Those words died when your hand was slapped harshly away, Bakugou still walking forward until he was crowding into your space. You tried to shrink back, but a rough hand latched onto the back of your neck, holding you still as Bakugou closed in on you, bringing your foreheads together.
“You are such a spoiled little princess. Think you can get away with shit, yeah? Never had a man in your life to put you in your goddamn place, that’s why, isn’t it?” 
You blanched, still trying to lean backwards, away from his overwhelming presence. It was kind of scary, how he was all up in your face, how his fingers gripped the back of your neck so tightly, how his face was so close to yours that you could feel his warm, minty breath.
“Bakugou, ple-“
“Nah, shut the fuck up. We’re past any point where you could’ve begged for forgiveness. I am so sick and tired of your bratty little attitude. You keep testing my patience, being a little shit, acting like you own the damn place. You’re gonna show me you’re fuckin’ sorry princess.”
A hand wrapped around your waist, another on your thigh, hefting you up with brute strength and slinging you over his shoulder in the blink of an eye. The swift movement made your head spin for a second, but you quickly adjusted.
“Woah, what the hell man? Put me down!” Bakugou ignored you, spinning on his heel and marching towards the guest bedroom. “Dude, put me down right now, this isn’t funny anymore. C’mon, put me down, I get it. You’re in charge, and I gotta listen. You can let me down now. Please?”
Your pleading went unheard, even as it got more and more desperate the closer to the guest bedroom he walked. When you passed through the doorway, you kicked at the mans stomach, tried to hit his back - you had a faint idea of where this was going, and it was nowhere good.
Without ceremony, you were thrown on the bed, the air getting knocked out of you with the impact, your head bouncing a few times on the mattress.  Bakugou turned, shutting and locking the door before he was back in front of you again, a vicious look on his face.
You scrambled backwards on the bed, holding out one hand as if to ward him off. “Okay, dude, wait, you don’t want to do this. Please don’t do this, you’re a good guy-“
“Shit, do you ever stop running your mouth? Calm the fuck down princess, I’m just gonna spank you ’till you cry, then we’ll be even.”
The idea was humiliating, embarrassing, degrading. But it was better than what you thought was about to happen. Bakugou grabbed your ankle, pulling you back towards him with a quick yank, sitting down beside you on the bed. The man patted his lap expectantly, before getting impatient with your hesitance and grabbing your hair, pulling you across his lap with a pained shriek from you.
“Now, here’s how this is gonna fucking go. You’re gonna sit there and take it, and you’ll be done once I say so. Now shut up.”
Without further ceremony, a broad hand slapped your ass, your shorts providing only the thinnest of barriers. You weren’t ready for the hit, so you lurched forward across the mans lap with a small cry. Another smack landed, and while you still weren’t ready, the sting wasn’t as jarring as the first slap.
SMACK
SMACK
SMACK SMACK SMACK
You tried to not whine, or cry, or make any noise, but it was hard. His hand was coming down with more force on each strike, and it /hurt/.  You could feel your skin throbbing underneath your shorts, red and tender, and you were ready to be done. 
Bakugou however, was not.
He kept going,
SMACK
Each hit harder than the last.
SMACK
You wanted to cry, trying to hold it in, just endure through the mortification of being spanked like a child.
SMACK
SMACK
SMACK
You couldn’t take it anymore, bursting into tears, skin burning, blubbering for Bakugou to stop, please.
The spanking stopped. 
The two of you sat there, you sobbing, Bakugou rubbing the skin of your ass over your shorts. Somehow, that hurt just as much as the spanking did, so you reached a hand back blindly, trying to catch his wrist and push him away. As soon as you grabbed his wrist, Bakugou delivered another savage slap to your behind, making you immediately apologize and drop your hands, let him pet and stroke your ass at his leisure.  It hurt.
You don’t know how long you both stayed there, Bakugou further irritating the burning, raw skin of your butt, you sniffling and calming down from the full-bodied sobs that had wracked your form earlier.  It had been long enough that you barely flinched when Bakugou tentatively fingered the waistband of your shorts, twisting up the fabric, as if he were hesitant to go further, but obviously considering it. You didn’t flinched when a decision was seemingly made, and a hand started slowly pulling your shorts down.
You flinched when the fabric slid over a particularly sore welt on your ass.
“What are you doing??” You panicked, trying to rise up, move away. A hand between your shoulder blades held you down, Bakugou’s gruff voice telling you to stay still.
“I just wanna see how it looks, fuckin’ chill out princess.”
It’s not like you could argue, so off slid your shorts. You tried to protest again when you felt fingers hooking into the waistband of your panties, but another swift slap to your rear had you keening in pain, quickly falling silent. You could let him assess the damage, but that was it. If he tried to touch you further, you’d bite a chunk of his skin off, go find your phone and call the police. 
With your lower half bared to the room, you squirmed uncomfortably, immediately stilling when Bakugou’s hand smoothed over the abused skin of your ass. He seemed fascinated by the damage he had caused, and you were sure that there were welts, maybe even bruises already forming. Your skin burned, and not in a pleasant way. God, it was painful.
There was so much pain, your skin somehow felt numb and on fire at the same time. You almost didn’t notice Bakugou’s hand dropping to your thigh, slowly beginning to wiggle it’s way upward, headed towards the little pink slit nestled between your legs. 
When his hand made contact with your pussy, you flipped out.
Almost literally - you rocketed off the man’s lap so fast that you almost flipped over onto the ground, just barely catching yourself at the last second. 
And then you were standing in front of the man, lower half completely bared, him staring at the space between your thighs, before slowly dragging his eyes upward to find your own. 
You turned tail and ran for the door.
A problem with your aforementioned plan of calling the police, was forgetting that Bakugou was a security guard. His job was literally chasing people down, subduing them.
He had you pinned to the door in a matter of seconds, chuckling in your ear. 
“Damn, I really was just only gonna spank your ass raw. You look goddamn delicious though, and it seems like you just haven’t learned your fucking lesson.”
You were hauled backward, a hand pulling your hair, the other wrapped around your waist. For the second time that day, you were tossed onto the bed, but this time you barely stayed for a second, already trying to scramble off the other side.  But Bakugou was faster, his hand around your calf and dragging you back to him with an iron grip. 
A scream tore out of your throat, and you kicked at the man with all your strength as you got closer, catching him square in the jaw. His head snapped back, but his grip never loosened, keeping you stationary while you tried to wiggle away. 
His other hand came up to massage his jaw while he slowly rolled his head down to fix you with the most intense, hungry look you’d ever seen a human wear.
“Ohhh, shit. You don’t even know what you just did, do you princess?”
You gasped at his breathy laugh, the way his eyes seemed to light up. Within a second, he was on top of you, face inches away from your own. You could feel his dick, hard against your thigh.
“Wait, you don’t have to do this-think of the consequences! Please, I won’t tell anyone, just let me go, right now. You don’t want to do this Bakugou, please, it’s not gonna be good for either of us-“
He ignored your reasoning, instead focusing on ripping off your shirt, doing the same to your bra. You tried to stop him, hitting and punching, trying to sink your nails into his back, claw at his eyes. You even resorted to snapping your teeth at his nose when his face got too close, turning your head to sink your teeth into his forearm.
Bakugou just groaned throatily, his eyes fluttering shut. Immediately, you let go, not expecting that response. That was supposed to hurt, why wasn’t he yelling in pain? The man lifted his forearm, watching blood start to drip from where your blunt teeth had punctured his skin. He was breathing heavily, straddling your legs, hunched over you like a dog.
The next seconds were a blur, clothes coming off, his hands manhandling you onto your side, his deranged laughter and low, excited swearing filling your ears.
You found yourself on your side, Bakugou straddling one thigh, holding the other up with his arm. He was lining himself up with your opening, rough hand guiding his dick to nudge against your entrance. You screamed.
“Stop it! Stop it, please! You can’t do this! Oh god, stop, stop, stop, don’t-“
“I can do whatever the hell I want, princess.” The man spat, seemingly unaffected by the way you thrashed your body. You tried kicking the leg under him, but his weight anchored it firmly to the bed. You tried kicking the leg he was holding in the arm, but his tight grip just became painful, squeezing you into place. You tried to sit up, to reach out and grab him by the neck and squeeze, but the position you were in was impossible. He knew what he was doing.
You screamed again, a sound of pained, fearful anger crawling out of your throat. Bakugou just laughed.
“This wouldn’t be happening if you had just been good and listened to me. We could’ve gotten along.” He gathered the spit in his mouth, before crudely spitting onto his fingers. “I would’ve left you alone for now, I mean, I’m not a bad guy. “ Bakugou slapped his spit-slicked fingers down over your pussy, smearing his saliva along your folds, messily rubbing it in.
“I’m an upstanding citizen, I keep little crooks and stupid brats from running things their way, that’s all I’m doing.”
You yelled as a finger entered you, probing at your walls. “That hurts! Take it out, take it out! You’re disgusting, get off of me! Stop-!”
Bakugou kept talking, pointedly ignoring your panicked whining. 
“Yeah, I’ve seen you before, and you’ve got a nice little body. But it’s not like I was just gonna up and hold you down. Good thing you’ve been giving me reasons all week though, being an absolute spoiled-ass princess, you’re so fucking annoying.”
Another finger joined the first, roughly jamming into your cunt, your juices beginning to flow and smooth the way. It was so stupid that your body was responding to this.
“I woulda never touched you, no matter how much I fucking wanted to, if you had just been good. I guess it works for me that you’ve been shit, huh?”
The man laughed again, leaning down towards your face to smile at you in a jeer, adding another finger to your aching pussy. The stretch hurt, it was too soon, but it felt good nonetheless. It’d been a while since you’d last messed around with someone.
When his fingers retracted, you gasped, face quickly blushing red. Another glob of spit was ejected onto Bakugou’s hand, and he quickly slicked up his cock with his own saliva, hissing as he first touched it.
As he lined himself up, you tried begging one more time. “Bakugou, Bakugou, please. Please don’t, you don’t want to do this. You can’t! Just let me up, please? Oh god, please, just let me go, I won’t tell anyone.”
He shoved the entirety of his cock inside with one, jarring thrust.
You screamed, voice cracking in the middle. The stinging pain of your ass was forgotten in the face of the jabbing, spiky pain in your lower abdomen. Bakugou hissed, eyes closed in bliss.
“God, you’re fuckin’ tight. You a virgin?”
Tears in your eyes from the unexpected pain of being filled so suddenly, you shook your head no. Bakugou clicked his tongue.
“Ah, I kinda figured. Slut like you probably can’t go a few days without a cock stuffing your cunt.” A thought seemed to cross his mind, and Bakugou’s eyes opened, peering down at you inquisitively, a slight twinkle in his eye.
“Is that why you’ve been such a demanding little princess?” You shook your head no vehemently, the pain slowly fading the longer Bakugou remained still inside you. “Holy fuck, that’s why you’ve been like this all week! You just needed a cock!” The man laughed before reaching a hand down to pat your face condescendingly. “Don’t you worry princess,  I’ll give you what you need.”
No further words were spoken, despite how much you wanted to scream and yell and curse at the man above you. He immediately drew his cock back, before thrusting into you again, quickly finding a mind-numbing pace that didn’t allow you any time to think.
His thrusts were smooth, steady, fast - it was hard, no, impossible to stop yourself from moaning at how good everything was starting to feel, despite how much you didn’t want it to. It was even worse when Bakugou’s hand found it’s way to your clit, beginning to furiously rub the little button as he fucked you stupid.
“Yeah, you fuckin’ like that?”
You ignored him completely, turning your face against the covers of the guest bed. Bakugou just huffed, increasing his pace ever so slightly.
It wasn’t long before you were gasping, moaning on every other breath, trying to hold yourself back from begging the man to let you cum. You writhed underneath him, trying to arch your hips back to meet every one of his thrusts, ride the hand that was rubbing at your clit so nicely.
Your orgasm hit you out of nowhere. 
It fizzed in your stomach, pleasure racing through you so quickly that you lost your breath, muscles locking up. It felt so good, you couldn’t breath, couldn’t move. Bakugou fucked you through it, smirking down as you obviously rode out your orgasm, his finger falling away from your clit before you could get overstimulated. 
A few more thrusts, and Bakugou pulled out, quickly moving to straddle your chest as he quickly jerked himself off. His hand made the most lewd sound, squelching up and down his length that was drenched in your juices. 
You were so blissed out from your orgasm, you almost didn’t mind when cum started splattering over your face.
You did mind, however, when Bakugou tried to rub it into your skin after he finished.  A quick snap of your jaws towards his fingers made your point clear, and Bakugou backed off.
“We have plenty of time to work on you, seems like you still need to be put in your place by the man of the house. Spoiled little princess.”
——
When your mom got home, you barely kept yourself from sobbing in her arms as she hugged you. You wanted to tell her everything that had happened, what Bakugou had done to you - but that would just make her more paranoid, fearful.
She would lock you in the house and never let you leave. Plus it was embarrassing. “Hey mom, by the way, the babysitter you hired for me, your adult child, raped me after spanking me so hard I bruised, and I couldn’t stop him!” Wasn’t a sentence you wanted to utter. You were weak, and stupid.
Bakugou watched in the background, his backpack slung over his shoulder, ready to head across the street and back to his own house. Your mom kissed your hair, finally disentangling herself from your arms, moving to talk to the gruff blond. You stayed by the door, watching Bakugou with narrow eyes.
“We were fine - although, you were right in having someone come over. She’s irresponsible as hell, I don’t know what could’ve happened if I wasn’t here to stop her from doing stupid shit.”
Your mom threw you a disapproving glance, quickly turning to thank Bakugou for helping the two of you out. She pressed money into his hand, but he told her not to worry about it - he got to eat good food, sleep in a nice bed, and the wifi was better here than at his house. Your mom gave him a quick hug, and you watched his face sour, before he quickly moved away from her grasp.
“Just let me know if you ever need me to come hangout with her again - I think it’s good for her to have a strong male figure in her life. And my wifi sucks, so it’s a win-win for everyone.”
Except you.
Your mom clapped her hands together excitedly. “Oh, that’d be perfect! What a nice young man you are, I knew you were trustworthy.”
Your stomach soured. 
Bakugou said his goodbyes, obviously trying to get out of the house and away from your touchy mother as quickly as possible. Your mother thanked him again, welcoming him over “at any time!” To use the faster wifi, as long as he wouldn’t mind hanging out with you.
Bakugou gave a gruff laugh, brushing past you on his way out the door. He turned, looking at your mother, then at you.
“I’ll be here to help out, don’t you worry princess.”
You slammed the door in his face.
He was never stepping foot in your house again, not if you could help it.
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raindownforme · 3 years
Text
He Doesn’t Understand
C!Charlie Slimecicle x reader [they/them used]
Slime ran his hands down the white shirt of his suit, pressing it flatter against his body. Quackity would be downstairs any minute now.
“Hey.” Quackity’s voice rang true as he descended into the room Slime slept in. He bounced up from his bed, running over to Quackity.
“Hi Quackity from Las Nevadas! I’m excited to do gambling!”
“No gambling today buddy.” Quackity chuckled a bit. “I’ve got another thing for you.”
“Oh?” Slime followed Quackity out of the base of the tower towards the entrance to the city Quackity had built. He watched as Quackity extended a hand to gesture off into the distance.
“Do you remember when I had you spy on Purpled?”
“Yes!”
“Good, because I need you to spy on someone else.”
“Okay Quackity from Las Nevadas!” Slime followed Quackity to the outskirts of the SMP. Quackity pointed out to him a lone brick house that sat atop a hill to the west of the community house. Smoke rose from the stone chimney and blew daintily over the landscape.
“That’s y/n. I need you to tell me what they do on day-to-day basis. I need to know where they go. Who they hang out with. Who they trade with.” Quackity turned his back to the SMP. “I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Yes!” Quackity walked back to Las Nevadas, leaving the green man behind. Slime bounded over towards the hill. He found himself a vantage point, climbing to the top of a spruce tree to watch. He could see into the wide windows of the home, where someone was working over a crafting table.
Slime watched in confusion. y/n did perfectly normal things, shearing their sheep, tending to their farm, and mining in caves. There was nothing unusual about y/n, other than that they were new and made Slime feel… something? It was something he didn’t recognize. Some feeling that itched at his bones — if he had any to begin with — and tore at his heart. He felt warm all over and jittery. He knew he was happy, Quackity told him what happy was. But this was a different happy. It was new. So he kept watching. Slime spent his whole day watching y/n. Spying on them.
When night fell, Slime hurried back to Las Nevadas to meet with his best friend Quackity. He was waiting at the top of the tower that Slime slept under.
“Hey buddy!” Quackity sat at one of the tables. “How was your day?”
“It was good! I think I call it, happy?” Slime sat in the seat next to Quackity, folding his tie so it lay flat against his chest.
“Good good. Here eat this.” Slime took the plate of baked potatoes from Quackity and began to eat sloppily with his hands. He took the whole potato and placed it into his open mouth, letting his slime self absorb it fully. Quackity watched on in horror of Slime’s seemingly normal actions. “Okay. Did they do anything? Anything suspicious?”
“Nope. They didn’t talk to anyone or trade with anyone.” Charlie paused. He looked to his side out the tall windows, gazing out over Las Nevadas. “Why am I spying on them?”
“Because I need to know. They’re new. They’re… unpredictable.” Quackity cut into his dinner with his utensils. “Why don’t you go back tomorrow. Tell me what you see then.”
And he did. Slime went back for the next three days. He went back to the same tree for three days and watched as y/n tended to their crops and went mining and did other meaningless tasks. And every day he went back and told Quackity what had happened and what they had done. Nothing felt eventful about it to the Slime, only the fact that he couldn’t describe how he felt every day he went and watched.
On the fourth day, Slime made a mistake. He had walked up and climbed the tree, as per usual, and had waited and watched. But it had started to rain, and the branch he was sitting on had become slippery, and he fell. He fell all the way from the very top of the tree to the muddy earth below. He opened his eyes wide, hoping that y/n had somehow not seen, but they were standing directly over him.
“Bah!” Slime scrambled to his side, sitting up and leaning against the tree trunk. y/n stood before him, pointing a shovel tip towards his chest.
“Who are you?”
“I-“ He paused. His face felt unexplainable warm. “I’m a human being.”
“Sure.” y/n hesitantly drew back the iron shovel, planting the tip in the dirt. “I’m also human. My name is y/n.”
They knelt down in front of him, extending a hand for him to obviously shake. “DAP ME UP.”
y/n laughed at his outburst, and he felt star struck. Something about the way they laughed was enchanting. He couldn’t look away. “What’s your name buddy?”
He couldn’t think. Quackity had never given him a real name before other than Slime, but he supposed that was more his species. It might be more similar to calling a cat “cat” rather than fluffy or spots. “I don’t have one.”
“Oh. Okay. Why don’t you come inside with me?” y/n stood up, extending their hand again, and this time Slime put his own hand in it. y/n tugged him upright until he was standing, then pulled him inside. “Here. Take this.”
Slime studied the fabric he’d been handed. “A towel!”
“Yeah. Go ahead and dry off and then you can sit anywhere.” y/n turned their back to him as they rummaged through a series of cabinets that hung over their furnace. “Would you like anything to drink? Cocoa? Tea?”
“Cocoa?” Slime sat on a set of oak chairs. He wasn’t sure what cocoa was, but less than a minute later y/n returned with two cups of the piping hot liquid, one for him and one for them. He sipped from it, unsure of if he would enjoy it, but quickly found it to be one of the best things he’d ever drank. Slime chugged the whole mug, nearly slamming it back down on the table.
y/n bit back a grin. They hadn’t drank their cocoa yet, instead using it to warm their palms. “So, a name. I could pick one for you?”
“Yes!” He smiled widely, but he wasn’t sure why he was so eager.
“Okay. Lemme think; Westley, Taylor- no wait!” y/n snapped their fingers, smiling at slime. “Charlie! What about Charlie?”
“I can be Charlie!” Something about seeing y/n happy was euphoric. He wanted to be able to do it every day for ever and ever.
“Good! Well then, Charlie.” y/n released their grip on their mug ever so slightly. “Where are you from?”
“I live in a tower.” He felt as though he should be careful with what he said. Quackity hadn’t told him whether or not y/n was welcomed in Las Nevadas.
“That’s cool.” They sipped from the warm drink. “Do you know anyone else from around? I’ve only lived here a week now and you’re the first person I’ve talked to.”
“I am?” Charlie felt a bubble grow in his chest, but he wasn’t sure what kind of bubble.
“Yeah. I guess that means you’re my first ever friend doesn’t it?”
The term “friend” struck somewhere inside him. It was negative somehow. “Yeah! Friend!”
y/n glanced out towards the windows. “You don’t have anywhere to be do you? It’s almost sunset.”
“Oh. Oh I do!” Charlie stood from his seat. “I have to go home. It was nice meeting you.”
y/n waved as he ran out the door. “It was nice meeting you too. Come back tomorrow.”
And Charlie did. Charlie came back every day for the next week. He liked coming back and seeing y/n. y/n who taught him how to aim a bow. y/n who taught him how to fish. y/n who taught him how to grow carrots. y/n who taught him how to make paintings. y/n who taught him love.
Once when Charlie found himself visiting y/n, early in the morning before he left, Charlie had found himself in front of Foolish. He had walked over to ask the simple question.
“Slime, I think you love them.”
“Love?” He was confused. He hadn’t experienced the word before.
“Did you ever have something or someone you care about? More than you care about yourself?” He didn’t show any signs of recognition and Foolish sighed. “Do you want this person to be happy? So much so that you would do anything?”
“Yes!” He liked seeing y/n happy. He’d help them garden and pick their favorite flowers, and he always cherished the smile on their face.
“Buddy, you love them.” Foolish gave him a halfhearted smile before walking away.
He thought about this conversation on his way to y/n’s house. He paused his walk, one hill away, and looked out. It was earlier in the morning, but it was still the normal time for him to arrive at y/n’s house. He could turn back around. He hadn’t quite told Quackity the honest truth of him and y/n’s relationship. As far as Quackity knew, Slime came home every day and told him how y/n did nothing eventful and had no idea Slime or Quackity existed. Quackity also didn’t know that they called him Charlie, and that he loved the name with everything he had.
Charlie bent down on his knees, picking a flower from the grass, then made his way to y/n’s home.
“Charlie!” They threw open the front door upon seeing him through the window. They launched themselves at him, tackling him in a hug. “What do you want to do today? We could do anything!”
“Yeah!” Charlie wrapped one arm around y/n, the other holding the flower. “I brought you something!”
“You did?” y/n released him, still keeping a hand on his shoulder. “A flower! Aw, Charlie.”
Charlie beamed with pride as y/n gently took the flower from him and went inside to place it in a pot. “I also have something I should tell you.”
y/n returned outside, confusion etched into their face. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“Yes!” Charlie felt nervous somehow. He looked down at his fingers. “I am not human. I didn’t want to lie.”
“Oh. I knew that.” He looked up to y/n. They were smiling softly as they leaned against the door frame. Charlie felt his face grow warm and he placed his hands over his cheeks. y/n walked towards him, taking his hands in theirs. “You came here without a name, with slime on your shoulders, and skin that’s sticky to the touch. You don’t have to be embarrassed. I don’t care. Im pretty sure half the people on this planet aren’t human.”
Charlie nodded, looking back up to y/n. “Are you human?”
“Yeah. I mean, as far as I know.” They shrugged, still smiling at him. Charlie felt light, like air. It was love wasn’t it. That’s what had been consuming him this whole time. What he’d been feeling every time he looked at y/n. Every time they spoke. Every time they did anything.
“I love you.”
“What?” y/n took a step back from Charlie, their hand still hovering near him. He felt his heart reach out for them.
“I love you. I talked to Foolish because I didn’t understand what I was feeling, and now I do! Because I love you. I have loved you since I first saw you.” Charlie smiled widely, proud of himself. He waited for y/n to say something, but they stood there in shock. “I thought I should be honest. Did I say something wrong?”
“No! No Charlie you didn’t.” y/n relaxed. They leaned forwards towards Charlie, now taking his hand and lacing their fingers together. Charlie held his breath, smiling as he stared at the hands. “I just want you to be sure that’s what you meant.”
“Yes! Yes it is.” y/n softly smiled, taking one hand and resting it on Charlie’s cheek, using their thumb to gently rub the skin. Charlie felt his face burn at the touch, but he leaned into it. y/n took their other hand out of Charlie’s grasp and placed it on his other cheek. They pulled him close, pressing a quick kiss to his lips. Charlie froze, lightly touching his hand to his lips. “Did you kiss me?”
“Is that alright?” y/n moved back, their hands sliding off his face. Charlie took his arms around y/n’s waist, pulling them into a tight hug. He put his forehead in the crook of their neck. y/n laughed lightly, pulling him closer again. “I love you too, Charlie.”
Charlie bent backwards, lifting y/n upwards. They laughed as Charlie spun them around. “I love you! I love you I love you I love you!”
“I love you to Charlie.”
He stopped, setting them back on their feet. y/n smiled wildly, breathless and love struck. “Can you kiss me again?”
y/n giggled, obliging to do so. They lightly kissed him on cheek, then his nose, his eyebrow, his chin, and anywhere else. They scattered kisses all across his face, avoiding his lips. “Is that what you meant?”
“No!” Charlie didn’t quite understand why they were laughing. He put his hand on their face, similar to what they had done, and firmly kissed them. He felt them relax under his touch, smiling into the contact.
Eventually y/n pulled away, needing to breath. They smiled at him and Charlie felt his face flush. “Was that your plan for today?”
Charlie relaxed his shoulders. “I didn’t have a plan.”
“Then come inside.”
y/n tugged Charlie into the home. The two spent the rest of the day together, baking cookies, reading stories, and doing any other odd tasks. The day soon came to an end, however, and Charlie had to leave.
“Come back tomorrow. Please.” y/n held his hand, keeping him later than he intended. It was nearly dark outside, and he was usually in Las Nevadas right now.
“I will.” Charlie quickly kissed y/n’s forehead and dashed off towards his country. He made it over the hills as quickly as possible, getting past the welcome sign before complete darkness fell, and racing up to the top of the tower.
Quackity stood pacing the railing. The dinner set out for the two had long gone cold by now. Quackity kept mumbling to himself, constantly fiddling with the end of his tie. Charlie walked over to his friend, lightly tapping him on the shoulder.
“Slime? Where the fuck were you? It’s been an hour. Jesus Christ I thought- where were you?”
“I was with y/n.”
“Right the spying. Listen I don’t think you should do that anymore.”
Charlie felt his heart shatter. “Why? I thought you wanted-?”
“I know what I wanted.” Quackity waved a hand at Charlie’s words. He overlooked the growing country, then turned back to Charlie. “They’re not a threat to us, they can’t help us in any way, and I don’t want you disappearing again.”
“But I-“ Charlie stopped himself, unsure of how to speak his mind. “I want to go back.”
“Why? It’s just y/n.”
“It is them. Its y/n.”
Quackity looked at him incredulously. “Did you talk to y/n? Buddy I told you not to- for how long? How long has this been happening?”
“I talked to Foolish-“
“Foolish knew?” Quackity was activated. He rolled up his sleeves. “Buddy you got lucky with Purpled, not everyone’s like that. You’re gonna get hurt.”
“y/n wouldn’t hurt me. They love me.”
“And how are you so sure?”
“Because I love them.”
Quackity scoffed, resting his hands on his hips. “You don’t know what love is. You’re not even a person you’re- you’re a slime. You said it yourself.”
“Was Sapnap a person?”
Charlie watched Quackity freeze. He lowered his hands to his side in clenched fists as a sneer grew on his face. “What did you say?”
“You said I’m not a person. Was Sapnap? Was Karl?”
“You don’t get to fucking talk about them.” Quackity moved towards him. “You don’t get to even fucking think about them.”
“Then why am I different? Why is y/n different?”
“Because-“ Quackity bit back what he wanted to say.
“Quackity. What’s my name.”
“You have a name. I call you Slime. I call you buddy. That’s what everyone calls you.”
“y/n gave me a name. They call me Charlie.”
“Charlie? What and you like it? Some basic-ass name?”
“It’s MY basic-ass name!”
“Jesus christ.” Quackity sighed, rubbing at his temple with his fingers. “You’re not going back.”
Charlie tilted his head. “Why?”
“Because I don’t know them! You don’t know anyone other than the people who live here and you’re just out there in love with a stranger. I feel responsible for you, Slime.”
“It’s Charlie.”
“Okay, Charlie, I’m responsible for you. So you’re not going back. No negotiation. Got that?”
Charlie paused. He looked out over the Las Nevadas skyline, then back to Quackity with a smile. “I think you’d like them.”
“Yeah. Sure I’ll see you in the morning bud.”
Charlie watched Quackity walk towards the center of the tower, dropping downwards towards the ground. Charlie went to follow but stopped. He stared at the plates of cold food left behind. Both untouched.
———
Charlie woke up quickly. Everything around him was quiet and cold, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was morning. Charlie rose from his bed and made his way to the top of his stair case. He looked out to see the sun was still rising over the horizon, painting Las Nevadas in golden light. The fountain bubbled as Charlie walked towards it. The lights inside seemed beautiful.
Charlie didn’t understand. He didn’t understand why Quackity wouldn’t let him see y/n. y/n was nice. y/n made him hot cocoa and told him stories and taught him so many things. And y/n was so pretty. y/n made Charlie feel loved. Like he was important. Like he was floating to the heavens. y/n made Charlie happy! And he wanted Quackity to be happy. Would he be happy if he met y/n?
Charlie shook his head. Quackity seemed upset last night. He wanted Quackity to be happy, but not the way that y/n made him happy. He wasn’t sure what to call it.
Charlie looked back to the tall, white casino. In an hour, Quackity would wake up and leave, coming to wake Charlie, but in less than a minute Charlie made his own decision. He turned away from the casino and proudly walked out of Las Nevadas.
He walked all the way to y/n’s house. When he arrived, the sun had barely moved, and he could see the same golden light illuminating the front windows of y/n’s house. Charlie clumsily knocked on their front door.
“Hello?” y/n slowly opened the door. Their eyes were closed and their hair stuck out different ways. Their pajamas loosely hung off their body as they slumped against the door frame. Charlie’s heart swelled. They were adorable.
Charlie rushed forwards to pick them up, wrapping them in a hug as he swept them back inside. “y/n!”
“G’morning Charlie.” y/n mumbled as they leaned back into his shoulder. “It’s early. You know that right?”
Charlie shrugged, setting them down and stepping back to make sure the door closed. “I wanted to be here.”
“Fine. But I’m going back to sleep.” Charlie watched y/n tread down a hallway, and he followed. They led him to a room with a large plush bed and they flipped into it, rolling to the side. They smiled at Charlie, looking at him standing in the door way. “I’m gonna sleep. Would you also like to lay down?”
Awkwardly, Charlie sat on the edge of the bed. He fell backwards into it, letting the softness consume him. He turned his head upwards, looking at y/n as they giggled. They stretched a hand towards him, enveloping his own hand. “This is nice.”
“Good. Goodnight. Love you.”
Charlie shivered, the unfamiliar words sending ripples over his skin. “I love you too.”
———
Charlie woke up in a weird mood. The bed was empty, and the house was noisy. It sounded like talking, between two different voices he knew really well.
Charlie walked quickly to the main room of y/n’s house. They stood in the door, still wearing pajamas, facing Quackity as he stood in the door. Quackity spotted Charlie almost immediately.
“Slime. Buddy.” Quackity tried to shove y/n aside, but they grabbed him by the shirt collar and slammed his against the wall.
y/n turned around, looking at Charlie. “You know him?” Charlie nodded, and y/n let go, allowing him to approach Charlie.
“It’s time to go man.” Quackity very lightly gripped the hilt of the sword that rested on his hip. “I told you.”
“But I-“ Charlie looked at y/n with pleading eyes. “I don’t want to go.”-
“He doesn’t have to go anywhere he doesn’t want to.” y/n side stepped between Quackity and Charlie. “He can make his own decisions.”
“This isn’t about you.”
“You’re in my house you’ll fucking listen to me.” Charlie took note of the small kitchen knife in their hand, concealed away from Quackity’s vision. “Charlie can decide for himself.”
Quackity sneered at them. “Would you shut up? This isn’t any of your fucking business. He’s my fucking friend and we’re going back to my fucking country that you’re not fucking part of. Charlie.” He looked over at the boy. “I mean- Shit. Slime. We’re going.”
“No.” Charlie stepped back. “My name is Charlie. I’m staying here. I want to stay here.”
“God you don’t— that’s not—“ Quackity sighed, running his hands over his head. “Fine. Great that’s awesome. You know what? Just don’t come back when this whole charade is over, because there won’t be a place for you.”
Quackity slammed the door shut on his way out. y/n turned to Charlie, loosing the tight grip on the knife. “You don’t have to stay. He’s your friend.”
“I’ve seen this place. I don’t think he should talk to me like that.” Charlie tapped at his cheek with his fingers. Water was falling from his eyes and setting his skin. He kept wiping at it , desperately trying to be rid of the water, until y/n took his hands away. They wrapped their arms over the tops of his shoulders, pulling him into a hug. “I don’t- I don’t understand it won’t stop. I don’t understand.”
y/n didn’t say anything. They simply threaded their fingers through the hair at the base of his neck, doing their best to comfort him.
The house was quiet.
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evelxtus · 3 years
Note
Nah, you stone cold for Forgetting to enable ask/J
I know you might've seen this request around. But Can I requests Xiao, Childe, and Diluc (and possibly Zhongli) with a Isekai!Male!Reader Who after weeks of dating, Snaps a photo of them out of nowhere. But the thing is, phones don't exist in they're world. How would they react?
Isekai!Male!Reader × Genshin Impact. ꒰Snaps a photo of them out of nowhere.꒱
Tumblr media
Characters included: XIAO, CHILDE, DILUC, ZHONGLI.
Warning: none
Type: scenario
Plz I didn't know there was a button to activate it 💀
Thank you so much btw, you are my first request ;;;; im happier than i should be
And I love the idea, it'll be fun.
› 〉Xiao.
There you were, enjoying a peaceful evening at Wangshu Inn after a long day defeating some monsters. Truth be told, Xiao only cared about being with you, but he used the excuse of "defeating monsters together" to cover that fact. And so it was for a few weeks, in which little by little, it seemed more like dating. And neither of you were going to stop with that.
The anemo boy looked so cute eating his favorite dish, Almond Tofu... And you were so excited to have ended up in that world and met Xiao. You couldn't help but glance at him when he ate, he seemed to enjoy himself as a small child no matter how much he tried to hide it. You couldn't waste this opportunity. With a quick movement, you took your mobile out of your pants, and took an unsuspecting photo of the adepti, in which you could see how it was approaching a piece of tofu to his mouth.
He placed back the same chunk on the plate, looking at you with raised eyebrows. The truth is that he had been a little scared. "What... what was that?" his voice sounded with a tone of surprise and annoyance that you had already gotten used to. And it was normal, you had pointed an unknown object at him which had made a noise. It could perfectly be treated of a weapon, but he trusted you enough to know it was not the case. "I was taking a picture. You look pretty good, don't you think?" you answered showing him the result.
The confused boy approached his hand suspiciously to that new device for his eyes, and ended up holding it awkwardly with both hands, looking at the image you had taken seconds ago. "Ah... Another human thing..." A sigh left his lips, and he looked up at you heavily as he handed your phone back to you.
"Don't do it again. You scared me and it was stupid." After those words, you looked at him with some pity, so it didn't take long for him to clear his throat and correct himself. "Ask me before. But don't even think about being with that in your hands all the time. You know that human inventions are not to my liking."
Yes, of course. He's actually a bit embarrassed that you keep photos of him.
› 〉Childe.
You knew that your feelings had changed drastically throughout all the time, since you had first arrived in that world. Since you met, everything was fights and battles to see who was the best and strongest, and although the answer was always obvious - Childe won - you did not give up. It was... funny. And he was gentle sometimes.
You were like that for weeks, every time you see each other, the friendly fights changed to more relaxed plans, to the point that sometimes you just walked around and from time to time Childe bought you anything you liked. "Do you like this Rex Lapis plush?" He knew he didn't even have to ask you, you loved the stuffed animals that they sold especially if it was related to things from that world and not simple things like teddy bears. "Well, here you go."
He held out his arm for you to take the dragon shaped teddy, but instead you shook your head, you had an idea in mind. "Wait. Stick to him. And hug him." you asked him. The redhead looked quite confused with your orders, although he did so without question. Poor naive.
You took out your mobile and took a picture of it. The boy's eyes widened in surprise and he separated from the toy quickly. "What have you done?" Seeing you laugh, his eyebrows furrowed. "What's so funny? Let me see." You showed him the screen of your mobile, and out of the corner of your eye you could see how the opponent's cheeks were stained with a pretty redness.
When he realized you were looking at him, he shook his head trying to get rid of the blush. The redhead wrapped your neck with the long Rex Lapis teddy. "Let me use that thing. I want to try taking a picture myself. Better than yours."
Better than yours, yeah. Just because you were in them.
And he also wants to have his revenge. Surely he will steal your mobile to fiddle with it while figuring out how to take unsuspecting photos of you.
› 〉Diluc
The vineyard looked so pretty in the evening. The orange color of the sky mixed with the extensive terrain of that area, making it a picturesque landscape to behold, and a view that no matter how much you saw it almost every day, it was pleasant and relaxing for the two of you.
"Shall we relax here for a moment, Y/N?" Diluc asked kindly, as he pointed to a bench in front of the building. Your answer was yes, and you sat together. The pyro boy had closed his eyes as he raised his face slightly. The breeze caressed his face gently and made his long red hair billow in a gentle rhythm.
You took a picture of him as he was, and he didn't even notice. You focused your attention on the photo, looking at it and zooming in on it. How could that boy be so attractive without even trying?
You heard him clear his throat seconds later. Diluc was leaning out watching the screen with you while you admired the photo you took. "Eh..." you felt like cold sweats fell down your forehead at that situation. He had totally got you. Seeing your reaction, he quickly spoke again so you wouldn't feel awkward. "It's okay. I was just surprised you looked so much at... that. It's a... camera, right?" You nodded, still quite embarrassed. You really couldn't tell him it was a mobile. Not in that specific moment. "You could teach me how to use it. I also want to capture some moments with you... so I never forget them."
Aha. He wants to admire you just as you do with him.
› 〉Zhongli.
You loved hearing this man's stories. His voice was a melody to your ears that you could listen to day after day without getting tired. It was the only thing you heard, next to the sound of some birds in that place. He was telling you an anecdote that happened to him in that same area thousands of years ago.
What were you thinking when, on impulse, you suddenly took out your mobile and took a picture of him in the middle of the speech? Silence was suddenly made when you took out that device.
Zhongli had never seen that before. He looked at you waiting for an explanation, although he seemed just as calm as ever. "Well? What is that?" he asked, tilting his head a little. There was a note of curiosity in his voice. "A mobile. You can do various things with it." You answered while you gave it to him so that he could see it well.
"Oh, how interesting. And what you decided to do was to take a picture of me." a small smile lit up his face. "You know you have all the time in the world to see me whenever you want, you don't have the need to use this... device in my presence."
Exactly. All he wants is to enjoy your company while he has it, and to be able to feel you with all five senses, not just sight.
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Note
I am sliding in to request some yandere incubus Kirishima 👀. Maybe dubcon with a bit of a resistant darling who he coaxes and persuades into fucking him. Maybe uses incubus powers to have her be more willing and overstimulates her like crazy. Go as wild as you want, I don’t mind 👀
A full month and 5.3k words later...it is finished.  From now on if anyone wants an example of my writing at its best (and most selfishly self indulgent) I shall send them this fic. 
Warnings for this one: Dub con, drugging (kinda? magical drugging), some violence/blood mention, Delusional Yan Kiri at its finest. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The house was still as he hovered outside of your window, peering inside carefully. You were normally asleep by this time…The redhead practically vibrated with excitement as he slipped his claws under your window, slowly pushing it up. He had broken the lock several months ago when he had first caught your scent, peering through your window and finding you in the midst of a wet dream, desperately rubbing your thighs together in your sleep as you gasped. You were just so tempting he couldn’t help himself from slipping inside and eating you up~
You had been so beautiful that night, arched out under the moonlight gasping and twitching around him. Every meal before you suddenly felt so lacking. He may have gotten a little…over excited and watched with guilt as you struggled to get through the next day, completely exhausted after how much he had fed off of you. Even despite the guilt he felt, he couldn’t help but feel a deep yearning towards you, the desire to take even more.
He had never felt the urge to eat the same meal twice before you. Yet he found himself returning to you night after night, every time hunger pains shot through him, whenever he felt his own magic and energy starting to fade yours was the first face that popped into his mind. He had tried to go to other food sources but they always felt…lacking. Bland and unseasoned, their noises and fluids did nothing to excite him the way yours did. He was left full and energized, fed to the brim after desperately taking and feeding on his new virgin meals, but it always left him antsy and unsatisfied, haunted by the memory of your scent, your taste, just you.
It had gotten to the point where he was…touching himself. Masturbating! At the thought of you! The shame was so deep he had wanted to rip off his wings and tail, ashamed that a high class Incubus like him would become so desperate over some random little human that he would lower himself to self pleasure was…horrifying to say the least.
He took a deep shuddering breath just at the memory of those dark times as he glided further into your room, letting your scent surround him as he purred softly. Your scent already had the stress from those memories melting away, leaving him feeling fuzzy and relaxed, as it should! His mate should calm him~
Mate…just the thought of the word had him warm and giddy inside. It had taken him weeks to realize what all the feelings he had meant, you smelling and tasting so good, he was left unable to feed properly. He almost felt ashamed that he had made you wait so long before he realized! Oh, he hoped you would forgive him! What was he thinking, of course, you would! The two of you were destined for each other of course!
Oh, it was so exciting! You would be only his to hold, his to touch! Your small, fragile mortal body would curl up against his, warm and soft against him, arching and nuzzling into his touches like a good little girl~ He would sweep you up into his arms, being praised as your manly hero as he takes you away from your pathetic human world! No one would be able to stop him or deny him of his claim.
He would kill them if they tried.
His hand was trembling slightly with excitement as he reached out towards your bed, pulling your blankets aside as he crawled into the bed, inhaling deeply as he let your scent wrap around him.
Oh…He was so giddy thinking of all the things he could do with you now! He had always dreamed of having his own little mate to call his~ Someone made to please him, to love him, to be with him. Every inch of you from your head all the way down to the tips of your toes was built to be perfect for him~ Would you feel the same about him? Already he ached for you, ached for your touch, as many Incubi did when they found their mates, but you were human. Still, he liked to think that you were just as drawn to him as he was to you.
He could already picture it, you looking up at him, teary eyed and sleepy, begging for him to crawl into your bed, wrap you up in his arms and wings and hold you so you could sleep. You would beg for him so prettily, whimpering that you can’t sleep without him. He would wrap you up tight in his arms, carry you to the bed and ravish you until you couldn’t stay awake anymore~ He gasped softly nuzzling your pillow, breathing in hard as he purred softly. How would he do it?
Maybe he’d bury himself between your thighs, lapping and sucking at your dripping cunt, drinking your juices and working you through orgasm after orgasm until you have no choice but to pass out from the pleasure. Or maybe he’d stuff you full of his cock, rocking slowly up into you, drinking up every noise of pleasure as he makes love to you; tenderly bringing you to completion as you stayed limp and submissive under him, falling asleep while still rolling in the pleasure he gave you.
You would be so good for him wouldn’t you? Let him take you over and over, let him please you and bring you to the heights of pleasure. You would never touch another ever again…too desperate and needy for him, so perfect for…
He moaned low and deep, his hand dragging over his dick that was straining hard against his loose fitting pants. Every nerve in his body felt on edge, even just the brushing of fabric against his skin sending shockwaves of pleasure through his entire body. Fuck…He needed you so bad.
He couldn’t stop the small unmanly whimper that came from him as he tugged his pants down just enough for his member to pop out, the cold air hitting it leaving him shuttering hard. His teeth ached, begging to sink into your sensitive skin, to claim you, mark you up as his. He had never felt like this felt so…desperate.
It was addicting.
You did this to him…made him feel. Something he had always chased, desperate for the escape from the apathy that came with his cursed existence, doomed to forever chase the hunger and high of feeding off the pleasure of those who could feel. Yet here you were giving it to him freely. It was so addicting, to have all these feelings, towards you!!
He could never go back to the way it was before. He wouldn’t let it go back. He would kill anyone who tried to take you away from him, who tried to take this away…
He groaned, his entire body trembling all the way down to the tip of his tail as he slowly wrapped his fist around his cock, pumping it in his clawed hand. He could already imagine stuffing you full, coating you inside and out with his cum, claiming you so good no one would ever even question who you belonged to.
Oh, he couldn’t wait any longer! He wanted so badly to be inside you, cock nestled between your walls, your cunt squeezing down around him as his mouth and hands dragged over your soft skin. Already he could picture his claiming mark painted on your skin…
Something was nagging at him, an itch deep in the back of his brain as he swiped his thumb over his cock, huffing your scent as he pressed his face deeper into your pillow. He was missing something but he was too drunk on your scent, too focused on the build to his release to pay attention to the alarm bells blaring in his brain.
At least until he heard the bedroom door creak open followed by a frightened shriek.
“What the hell are you doing in my house?!”
He panicked, flailing as he spun around and sat up at the same time, staring at you wide eyed. Fuck! He had gotten so caught up in his fantasy he hadn’t even realized you weren’t in the bed, which meant you clearly weren’t asleep.
“I-I um, oh man I didn’t mean for you to meet me like this…”
You stared at him in confusion, eyes slowly dragging down until they locked onto his member, hard and leaking against his stomach. Your face immediately flushed hot, a startled squeak coming from you. Despite his panic as he tumbled out of your bed, clawed feet hitting your floor with loud clicks that just seemed to frighten you even more. He couldn't help the curl of amusement that swirled in his gut over the fact that you had immediately averted your eyes. Humans were always such silly things, so shy about sex and bits. Incubi were much more…open. Something you were going to have to get used to since he had no plans on hiding his dick away from his mate. Hell, the only reason he wore pants is because he thought they looked hella manly and cool! Like those famous actors from human movies! But now that he had a mate, he couldn’t imagine having something stopping him from just immediately taking you whenever and wherever he wanted, even if it was only for a second.
“Don’t be mad! I know im a bit late but I promise I’ll make it up to you~”
He calmed himself, grinning at you as he held his arms out as if asking for a hug as he advanced on you. You found yourself stumbling back as you stared at him in horror. He looked like something straight out of a horror movie, skin dark and reddened like blood, blackened horns jutting out and twisting around his head grotesquely, with every move the skin stretched over them almost seemed to pulse slightly as his slitted eyes roamed your body with a shamelessly large grin. Disgust and fear curled in your stomach as jagged sharp teeth were revealed to you, tapering off into sharp points just like the claws that spurted from his hands and feet. You could see a tail sway behind him, brushing the bottoms of large stretched out wings that were already curling towards you, stretching out as you stumbled back.
What…was he? For the briefest of moments you had thought it was the man from your dreams, warm and handsome as he fucked you, stuffed you full and left you shaking and crying for more. Every night you dreamt of him you woke up feeling sore but sated, your entire body aching but feeling so warm, the flashes of red hair and a bright smile still behind your eyelids. Warm moans and sweet praises still echoing faintly in your ears. This…thing in front of you was far from him.
“Stay the fuck away from me!”
You spun around, grabbing the door frame as you tensed, trying to run. Run where though? To the phone? Out the door? Should you scream for help? Who would believe you if you told them this this…demon was in your house, jerking off in your bed?
You had just barely made it out the door, feet sliding across the wood floor and nearly tripping you up when he moved too. In a flash he was through the door, behind you, arms wrapping around your waist and lifting you off the floor. You hadn’t even seen him move from his spot standing next to your bed.
“Let go of me! You sick fuck! Pervert! Help!”
You screamed kicking and flailing in his arms as he easily held you up off the floor. You tried elbowing his head, biting, scratching, hitting him in any way you could with your back pressed tightly against his chest and strong arms restraining you by your waist. He just laughed brightly as you hit him, any strikes just bouncing off his hard skin as he turned around to walk you back to your room.
“Feisty! I like that!”   
Rage filled your chest when he laughed at your attempts to free yourself. He was left unaffected while you were left throbbing in pain, every hit feeling like you were trying to punch a boulder. It was hopeless attacking him, it was clear he was stronger than you. So you did the only thing you could think to do.
You grabbed onto the door frame as he walked through, clutching it hard enough it hurt, refusing to let go even when he tugged you lightly. The bright grin that had been plastered on his face faded slightly, and you took that victory and clung to it, clutching the door frame tighter.
”Come on, don’t be like that. I know you want to play hard to get but I don’t want to hurt you. Look, you’re hurting yourself. Let go.”
You clung tighter, ignoring the rough wood digging into your palms hard enough that you were sure you would have slivers and cuts when you did let go. You didn’t care.
“Hard to get?! I'm not playing anything! Let go of me!”
You twisted trying to kick him again, lips curling into a snarl as he sighed at you. He shifted you in his hold, one arm unwinding from your waist just to hook under your thighs as he stepped closer, holding you firmer against his chest.
“You’re just nervous~ Don’t worry, Im sure any mortal would be, you probably don’t understand it completely yet, do you?~ I’ll help you relax~”
Understand what? Did the man have some sort of delusional fantasy about you? Anxiety filled you as you squirmed in the new grip as best as you could, trying to shove him away without letting go of your deathgrip on your door. You opened your mouth to snap at him, argue even more, kick and scream, anything so he would let go of you when a sweet scent started pouring off of the beast. You were breathing hard, both from the yelling and fighting, you got a large lungful of the smell before you could even register it was there.
The effects were immediate. Your head spun hard, hard enough you had to squeeze your eyes closed to stop the way the room suddenly spun hard, your entire body instantly falling limp in his arms.
“There you go~ Much better…”
You forced your eyes open again once everything stopped spinning so hard, staring up at the demon holding you with wide confused eyes. What did he do to you? He had shifted you so he was cradling you bridal style, you reached up to push at his chest, to push him away. You tried at least, your movements were slow, your body feeling weak. You pressed your hands against his chest, but you couldn’t find the strength to shove at him, to resist the jolts of pleasure that shocked you when you touched him.
“Easy there~ You might rile me up even more.”
You felt your face grow hot as he grinned down at you, ripping your hands away from his chest through pure will alone. Your cheeks burned  even hotter when he chuckled down at you, sitting down on your bed and turning to settle you down in his lap.
You shook hard as he wound his tail around your waist, tugging you until you were in a position he liked, large hands pressing against your stomach and sliding down your thighs, exploring your body, your skin in a way that felt so familiar…like he had done it before. You felt painfully aware of how his chiseled chest felt pressed against your back, how in this position, with your legs spread wide to try and straddle his thick thighs you could feel his hard on brushing up against your panties. You could feel your tummy flip as your cunt twitched, clenching down on nothing with every brush against your clothed heat.
“Please don’t hurt me…”
You were panting hard, desperate panicked breaths just proving to intoxicate you further, the sweet scent pouring off of him twisting around your senses and filling your head up. Every breath you took drained more of your fight out of you, panic and fear slowly being replaced with something…warm. Something sweet. You couldn’t bring yourself to push him away or thrash and fight like you were before. You felt disconnected from your body, willing it to move but you couldn’t manage more than the weak twitches of your fingertips and toes. You wanted to jump, pull away, do anything. Shamefully you noticed you were getting wet, soaking through your panties as your entire body tingled, arousal coiling tight in your gut.
“Oh, no, no, sweetie~ I’d never hurt you…Well, not unless you wanted me to.”
He grinned down at you, sharp and dangerous, his jagged teeth glinting under the moonlight that poured in from the open window.
You were panting hard, every weak gasp for air just proving to drunken you even further as you breathed in his scent, unable to stop yourself from slumping against his body. You trembled mewling weakly as his claws trailed down your skin, even just the soft scrape of his claws against your skin sending jolts of pleasure straight to your throbbing cunt. You jolted against his chest when his fingers finally pressed flat against your abdomen, claws easily hooking under your panties, hand sliding in to cup your privates fully.
“Good girl~ So wet for me~”
You trembled in his arms, flushing bright red when his hand was quickly coated in your fluids, hyperaware of the feeling of it slowly dripping out of your throbbing sex. You were painfully focused on his touch as his middle finger dipped between your lips, rubbing at your clit and entrance all at once, smirking as you jolted hard, a loud startled moan bubbling from your chest before you could stop it. You shuttered in his arms, whimpering as you arched back against him as he kept moving, rubbing at you as a deep growl vibrated through his chest.
“That’s it~ Good girl~”
You gasped, keening softly as he pulled his hand out of your underwear, making sure to drag his finger across your clit the entire way. Immediately his hands hooked under your bare thighs, smearing your juices across your skin as he lifted you up. 
“Let's get you out of these~”
He purred as he maneuvered you, easily holding you up with one hand as he dipped one clawed finger under the band of your panties, easily shredding through the fabric and tossing it to the side. You gasped whimpering as cold air finally hit your heated flesh. God...it felt like you were burning up. You could feel wetness dripping out of you, coating your thighs and dripping down onto his cock. You wanted to feel shame, fear, but your thoughts were too fuzzy, too consumed by the overwhelming lust that filled your entire body. 
“Now you’re getting into it, such a good girl~ My good little mate...Fuck you’re so soaked for me~”
You shivered moaning softly at his deep voice in your ear as he picked you up yet again, moving you until you were face down on the bed, hips propped up so he could grind his swollen cock against your dripping cunt. You found yourself drooling into your mattress as you desperately tried to rock back against his cock with your limited mobility. Fuck...you just...needed. You whined high and loud, frustrated as he chuckled down at you, his claws brushing down your back, leaving goosebumps in their wake as he cooed down at you. 
“Be patient. I’ll give you what you need...”
The sweet smell got even stronger as he leaned over you, pressing his chest against your back, cock rubbing between his thighs as his hands moved up to cup your breasts. You found yourself melting into the touch, panting and mewling weakly as he rolled your nipples between his fingers, claws leaving shallow scratches across your skin. Even that felt good…
“Such a good mate! Look at you, so gorgeous...I could eat you forever, you know~”
He purred nipping at your ear as he drank up your sweet pleasured cries, rocking his hips between yours as he thrust blindly between your thighs. Low grunts and groans were panted out right in your ear as he rut against your pussy, blindly searching for your entrance. 
“Gonna fill you up so good...fill you full of my seed. Make you mine!”
He growled his cock bumping against your hole, nudging against it before sliding past. Growling again he slowly pulled back, keeping his hands around your stomach as he lined himself up before thrusting into you. Claws pricked at your stomach, drawing small beads of blood as he forced you to take him all the way to the base in one thrust. 
You cried out, trembling hard as you clamped down around his cock as he stuffed you full. Your brain was telling you it should hurt, you shouldn’t’ve been able to take him like that, but all you could think about was the waves of pleasure rolling through you as you moaned. It was like you were molded to his cock, made to take him, made to be filled like this. The overwhelming feeling of wholeness made your head spin as pleasure danced along your spine. 
“You feel so good around me, baby~ I knew you were made to take me like this...that very first time your pretty little cunt wrapped around my cock, I knew I loved you.”
He gushed eagerly, voice rough in your ear as he rambled between moans, rocking his hips inside of you. First time…? What did he mean by-
You didn’t have time to register that fully, let alone ask him. He pulled out, cock dragging against your walls as you twitched and clenched around him before immediately thrusting back in, leaving you arching back against his chest, crying out for him. 
“You’re so tight~ It’s like you never want to let me go~ You must love me a whole lot, don’t you, baby?”
He growled happily in your ear as he started a rough and brutal pace, hips slapping against yours, the force of each thrust hard enough you found yourself jolting forward, only held in place by the iron grip he had around your stomach. 
He fucked you like he was making a claim, the wet sounds of your pussy clenching around him with every thrust filling the room along with his grunts and growls and your desperate pleasured cries. All you could do was hold on, your hands balled into fists as you clung to the sheets below you as waves of pleasure rolled over you, unable to think of anything but Kirishima. Every breath you took was his scent, all you could feel was his cock thrusting deep inside of you, his chest pressed against yours, the way he was kissing and nipping at your jaw. 
You didn’t even realize he had never told you his name, the very one you were whimpering. 
“Look, baby~ I'm right here.” 
You could feel the toothy grin against the back of your neck as a large hand pressed against your stomach, pushing hard enough you could feel every single thrust all the more. You sobbed in pleasure torn between grabbing his hand and ripping it away from your stomach and pushing it harder against it. Anything to keep the pleasure dancing behind your eyes. 
You weren’t sure how long you stayed like that, long enough that your throat felt raw, that your neck and shoulders ached with the bruises and marks he had left behind. Your nipples felt rubbed raw and sensitive. Everything blurred together, you were left limp and submissive in the demon’s arms, as he fucked you, snarling into the back of your neck. Compliments and praises were still raining down on you but they rolled off of you before you could even begin to process them. All you could think about was that heat coiling in your belly, you wanted to cum so badly. You whimpered desperately clenching down around him as you bucked your hips backwards, trembling hard when he snarled, thrusting his hips back inside you hard enough you actually found yourself sliding forward. 
“Shit, I’m close, baby...Are you going to cum with me?”
His voice was warped, deep and gravely, sounding harsher, darker than before. It wasn’t a voice that any human could ever hope to have. Still you whined high in your throat, nodding desperately, anything! You just wanted to cum so bad! Every time you got close, teased with that release it danced away from you, denying you of it. Not this time.
You nearly sobbed in pleasure as he started thrusting harder, hips stuttering as his cock pulsed hard inside of you. It only took one...two...three thrusts before he was roaring, the sound loud enough it vibrated through your body, your ears ringing as he came. He kept thrusting as he spilled inside of you, cum spilling out your hole around his cock and flooding down your thighs. He kept thrusting hard inside of you until he grabbed your hips with both hands, yanking you back onto his cock as he thrust as deep as he could. You seized up, screaming as you came, vision whiting out as you spasmed around his cock, drool spilling down your chin as your eyes rolled back. Wave after wave flooded through you, leaving you shaking and sobbing through the pleasure, immediately falling limp like a marionette with its strings cut the second it started to fade. You could hear his and your heavy breaths filling the otherwise silent room, feel the cum dripping down your thighs and pooling around your knees. 
He waited until you both had caught your breaths, still shaking and sweaty against each other's bodies before he suddenly lunged down, teeth sinking into your shoulder. You screamed in agony as sharp fangs sunk into your skin, tearing through your flesh. The grip around you tightened as he held you still, slurping and lapping at the blood that flowed heavily from the wound.  
You dropped to the mattress the second he pulled away, hanging limply in his hold as he slowly set you down. It felt like your very life had been sucked out of you, leaving you weak and confused, unable to navigate the maze of your own mind through the fog of pleasure and lust and now pain that had filled it. Black crept around the edges of your vision as everything started to blur together. Your eyes felt so heavy...
“Hey...None of that now. Not yet.”
You whined low in your throat as he grabbed your hair, making your neck arch back as you blearily blinked up at him, your shoulder throbbed hard, protesting the new position as it pulsed in pain, blood oozing out of the wound slowly. Your vision was reduced to shadows and movements, watching as the blurry outline of the demon sank his fangs into his own thumb, pulling away darker. The same dark blur that covered his fangs dripped slowly down his hand. He slowly lowered it to your lips, thumb slipping into your mouth. You tried to cringe back as a heavy metallic taste filled your mouth, but the hand entangled in your hair prevented you from moving an inch. Instinctively you swallowed down the fluid that flooded your mouth, cringing even more as it coated your throat uncomfortably and filled your senses. You cried out pitifully around his thumb even as you suckled on it, wanting to squirm away but unable to find the energy to do so. 
“Shhh~ I know. You’re okay.”
His thumb slipped from your mouth, hand letting go of your hair, finally letting you fall limply to your mattress. Relief filled your body as you finally relaxed, aching from head to toe, faintly you could still feel your pussy throbbing with every beat of your heart. Your eyes slid closed, fully believing the hell that you had just been put through was over.
Of course you were wrong. 
It started small, a soft tingling in your back, slight warmth that you ignored due to the overwhelming heat of the demon still draped over you. You could still feel his gaze boring into you, waiting. You ignored him, pressing your face harder against the mattress below you, determined to either stay there until he left or you suffocated. 
At least until your back started burning. The subtle heat from before was gone, replaced with an inferno tearing apart your lower back, burning through your muscles and skin. Faintly you could hear agonized screaming somewhere far away, it took you a moment to realize that that was you screaming. You couldn’t focus on it, though, the pain leaving your mind floating as tears streamed down your face, chest heaving for air. 
And then...his voice cut through it all. Deep and rumbling through your ear it was like a soothing balm across the flames that were eating you alive. 
“Shh~ Just accept it, baby~ Don’t fight it. I know it hurts, just relax...It’ll be over soon~”
Your whimpers were muffled as he leaned back, claws dragging slowly across your lower back. You screamed again, agony shooting through you as he touched them, pain hitting your consciousness like a bus. You twisted in place as best you could, weakly trying to turn around to swat away at his touch, only to freeze at what you saw. 
The demon's face was twisted into a menacing grin, eyes practically glowing with delight as his claws dragged down your back, pain rocking you to your core. All you could see was a vague black shape on your back, similar to the one that covered the demon’s arm. Everything was too blurry to make out the details, pain and darkness made the edges of your vision fuzzy. 
“You’re finally all mine~”
His voice was soft, warm, filled with so much joy and happiness it didn’t fit him, it didn’t fit the situation you were in. Your ears were ringing, stomach clenching hard. You felt like you were going to throw up. The darkness that had been creeping along the edges of your vision started spreading. 
The last thing you saw was pointed sharp teeth grinning down at you, tracing over your mark with a dark possessive glint to his eye. 
You were finally all his. 
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tendouluvr · 3 years
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hq!! boys taking care of their s/o who just got their wisdom teeth out - gn reader
- characters: iwaizumi, osamu, matsukawa, kyōtani
- warnings: small mentions of being on anesthesia, centered around wisdom teeth removal/oral surgery, wisdom recovery, vague mentions of blood/gauze/medications nothing graphic tho, a lot of talk about food and eating limitations
- wc: 198, 258, 241, 252
a/n: im writing as im currently recovering from my wisdom teeth removal 😪😪 so kinda (basically) v self-indulgent
this is all based on my own experience. i’m healing pretty fast i think and there hasn’t been any problems for me so i wouldn’t know, personally, cases where people get heavy nausea, dry sockets, etc etc
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IWAIZUMI
#! the best :(((
#! follows every direction the surgeon gave to the dot
#! before the surgery, he was given some papers and it was covered with post-surgery aftercare instructions and he read everything over multiple times
#! doesn’t let you do anything for days even though you were capable of doing things yourself by the third day
#! makes a lot of smoothies
#! he already drinks smoothies a lot on a regular basis besides his protein shakes and all that so being his s/o, you also get to drink them every other day
#! but your smoothie intake goes ☝️
#! understands your pain, makes sure you’re taking all of your required medications on time (he sets up alarms and timers) and giving you any doses of pain relievers as needed
#! (was about to blend up meals for you but you were adamant on him not doing that. you did not want to eat blended liquified food when it’s usually meant to be eaten solid)
#! overall,, kinda strict but he’s just tryna make sure you fully recover properly with no complications :)) you’ll probably be annoyed with him at some point for feeding you another smoothie, but you’re grateful for him anyway <3333
OSAMU
#! he’s a foodie :’(
#! lowk (highkey) sad you won’t be able to eat normally with him until you’re fully healed (could be weeks, could be up to a month and a half)
#! did a lot of research before and during the recovery process to go grocery shopping so he knows what he should stock up on and what he shouldn’t get
#! was kinda convinced four (4) days into recovery that you could start eating a bit normal again but you had to tell him no
#! “so when can you eat my onigiris again? it’s getting boring when only i’m trying new recipes, and you can’t,” he would constantly huff
#! “go feed your brother,” you would reply with an eye roll making him pout
#! your bottle of salt water is always filled because he makes sure it never runs out
#! his search history (and yours) is full of “can i eat ___ after wisdom teeth removal” LMAO mine is
#! to be honest, he was probably more scared of the surgery than you were
#! throughout the healing process, you grew a lot of cravings for a lot of food you couldn’t eat so he would write down everything whenever you tell him while laying in bed together
#! promises to make you all of the food on the list once you can properly eat again :’))
#! will spoil you rotten after this
you have no idea how bad i want focaccia bread rn. i need it. in my mouth. just imagine warm, crispy, chewy fresh out of the oven focaccia bread 💭💭💭
MATSUKAWA
#! does not care.
#! JK
#! he does care but he’ll act like he doesn’t
#! immediately laughs at you passed out on anesthesia in the passenger seat as he’s driving home
#! he’s still holding your hand though and caressing it 🙄
#! literally thought you would’ve been healed the next day for whatever reason ://
#! told you, “you look like a squirrel,” while you were sleeping in bed with gauze in your mouth
#! teases you a lot about the pain cuz he’s a meanie but he does things to take care of you at the same time
#! like reminding you to not drink with a straw because you sometimes forget, or making sure he doesn’t make you laugh/talk too much cuz it really hurts to open your mouth
#! constantly asks you about your extraction sites even though you already told him all you know
#! tempted to squeeze your cheeks because they looked so cute but you were swollen,,,,
#! stacks your pillows up at night so you’re not laying all the way down (he heard it helps with your swelling, something to do with your head being higher than your heart)
#! laughs when you struggle with brushing your teeth (he makes himself so despiseable)
#! kisses your forehead every night and whispers praises before you sleep to let you know you’re doing very well and will recover in no time
I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM GET THIS MAN OUT OF MY SIGHT!
KYŌTANI
#! leaves you to fend for yourself
#! im kidding >< he’s a sweetheart
#! helps you change into your pajamas after he brought you home so you can go to sleep
#! gets all of your meds ready while you were sleeping so you didn’t have to do it yourself after you woke up
#! he holds gauzes out for you while you take out your bloody ones so you didn’t have to stumble around for new ones
#! you lived off of water for a bit because you were afraid to actually eat (you also couldn’t really open your mouth anyway)
#! so when you finally told him you’ll eat now, he makes you whatever you wanted out of your very limited choices
#! he has a tiny grumpy pout while doing everything but it’s just his natural face :( he loves taking care of you, i promise
#! but you don’t really care honestly, you find it adorable
#! he slowly gets irritated as time goes on though because he doesn’t like that you’re going through this and it’s ruining the kisses you would give him from time to time
#! is actually a little childish when it comes to life in general so he gets really pouty at some point with furrowed eyebrows that just keeps getting furrowed-er
#! he grumbles a lot while taking care of you because even after oral surgery you could still find a way to tease him about being a softie
#! threatens to leave you to take care of yourself but he’s all bark
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my mom thought i was healed the day after my surgery and kept telling me i’m just being dramatic about not being able to eat a lot of things (and she kept cooking omf) and told me she thinks i’m fine and worried for no reason shdjsjaj i dont think she knew i had stitches in my mouth 😕
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kiwibirbs-library · 3 years
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Before and After Rituals
a/n: hi I hope yall like Imma make this a series with the schools so      mauh <3
pairings: karasuno x reader
warning: I’m pretty sure this is all clean if not feel free to say something. 
summary: the boy’s before and after game things that they do with you
seijoh || nekoma || fukurodani || shiratorizawa
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Daichi Sawamura
the night before a game you always go over to his house with some meat buns and either stay for a while or spend the night
he always holds onto you in some way
it calms him down 
its not anything big but it gives him a good sense of peace and quiet before chaos
after his game you always wait for him outside the gym, win or lose
he goes with his team back to the school and you meet him there too
you either go to his house or yours and one of you spends the night just to calm down his head
you always get snacks and even if he tells you to not get to much junk you always get to much and he doesn’t stop you
if he won then you talk about the next match and his thoughts on the team
he’ll also spin you around when he sees you outside the gym
idk he loves doing it
if he lost than he’ll start on things he needs to do better on and you’ll try and cheer him up with some corny jokes and kithes.
Sugawara Koshi
all the morning before the game you two are attached at the hip. 
everyone is just used to you “sneaking” onto the bus to drive with them
in reality him trying and failing horribly to cover you with his jacket and coach just giving up on it
constant quiet giggles at first as you try and calm his nerves
then around the end its more quiet and serious as he focuses a little more
after the game he naps on you the whole way home
if he wins you get to listen to his rambling about some idea he had on signals he could use or a set up he wants to try
he could literally talk for hours on what he was thinking wall watching and playing its so adorable
if he loses then theres a aura of sadness in the bus and if its bad enough he’ll muffle his small sniffs into your shoulder
that hasn’t happen except for date tech and sejioh though and your happy for that
you always sleep over after the game
always
Asahi Azumane
before the game welcome to teddy bear time
noya constant teasing for a week straight since the big dork is constantly on you freaking out
normally its not to bad and a lot of it is just of how scare he is that his spikes will get blocked a lot and the comments he’s sure to receive about his looks when he gets there
when game day does come you always kiss his cheek and hold his face to tell him good luck
def earning gags from tssuki but you didn’t hear it from me
after the game its like teddy bear time x10
win or lose you get a new weighted blanket for a couple of days
if he wins its a more happy blanket yes but he’s so exhausted that he just falls asleep on you the minute you meet him at his house after they left for the bus
plus a bunch of random ‘holy crap wait i did that?!”’s to himself throughout the day
if he loses he cries a little, blaming himself for the entire thing
you always tell him that its not his fault and that he did his best
he’s honestly so pessimistic the night after and your one it telling him that he needs to remember how it feels but not let it bring him down
you bring him up with those comments and he’s so grateful for it
Nishinoya Yuu
every time the day before a game he likes to go somewhere with you
weather it be the park, the arcade, an ice cream shop
a freaking pet shop (yes you almost got a pet that day)
he finds it relaxing to see you having a nice time with him and every time he always makes sure its a place to make you smile
after the game he’s a koala on you, win or lose
the only real difference is happy koala or sad koala
happy koala is randomly kissing you and laughing, nuzzling into you while Tanaka either gags or whines about how single he feels
sad koala is sniffling into your shoulder and clinging to you even more if its possible, hes pretty quiet too so you know hes waiting until you get home to talk about everything
course after that mini pout session hes all fighting and ready to see that team again and win
either one also ends with a cuddle movie night until like 2am
also unrelated but like he’s so freaking hot when he receives so always tell him that
Tanaka Ryuunosuke
ok ok this boy omg 
so before the game its MAJOR sucking up to you
literally after a while you’ll get more used to it and get what kinds of attention he wants but like at first its just a lot of complements and stares and draping
literally ennoshita is stretched so thin the week before hand by it all
no one even understands why he’s sucking up to you other than him, you (after a little), and ennoshita
he just wants you to return the energy
after the game all depends on winning or loosing
if the win he will always, without fail, kiss you like a million times all over your face when he sees you next
does not matter if its outside the gym or if its when he gets back to the school or what
every time
if they lose, well you now have a very sad puppy on your hands
mentally during a game he’s like no one you’ve never met but when he gets home and has sometime to think its all a bunch of ‘i could have done better’ and ‘i should have done better’ s
you are constantly reassuring him thats he’ll do it next time and that its not his fault
BACK RUBS ARE BIG WITH HIM AND YOU CANT TELL ME NO
but win or lose yall’s main thing is a movie and snack night
after that he’s really to go the next morning and beat up some volleyballs lol
Ennoshita Chikara
lol he’s the most chill i think
before the match he’s really calm
bb doesn’t think he’s gunna play but like he’s ready
honestly though the biggest switch is that he’s an even bigger cuddle bug than before
like he keeps it together at school but hangouts? coming over?
ha
better have gone to the bathroom before cause you’re not moving for the next couple hours
it’s like it calms him down after practice enough to think over what he needs to work on
after the game is the same no matter win or lose
every.single.time. he will always have a sit down with you to talk about what happened during the game
like quick nap, the meeting, then off to your house to go over the pros and cons on the game
he always has the moments when he thinks he’s not worth it to be put in the game but you always just ruffle his hair and tell him thats the furtherest from truth he could get
Kageyama Tobio
OH MY GOD YAY MY BOO
sorry anyways
so before a game he gets kinda quiet
normally he likes to chat about stuff that went on in practice or how hinata pissed him off that day while yall are sprawled on his couch
but he gets quiet the week before and just has that look on his face
you know the look
the ‘grumble grumble’ one
you always poke between his eyebrows and poke at him to make sure he doesn’t go to far into his thoughts
the night before its like a switch flips and hes muttering to himself like crazy on something he might be able to do with his sets
after a game is another win or lose situation
winning means you get little kid mode kageyama
literally his eyes sparkle at everything he enjoys afterward
milk
rewatching his match
anything you freaking do, all that
plus napping, a lot of napping
losing is sad to watch
he sort of goes back a few steps in the social department and goes robot mode
you both will camp out on his couch, his head buried in your lap or shoulder
if its bad enough he cries a little
you always sleep over no matter what
Hinata Shoyo
SHOYOOO
alright this boy before the game is normally fairly daily ngl
you get normal bouncy sunshine that will follow you anywhere and everywhere all the time
but the night before you get meditation mode where he sets out his game stuff and sits there for like half an hour
first time this happened you got scared for him cause he never sits still that long
NEVER
now though you just sorta hang on his bed watching him cause its cute
after the game is the biggest depending there is out of the rest
if he wins he is bouncing of the walls after a little nap
when you finally get him home he’ll have you throw the ball back and forth for like an hour before you call it and make him lay down or eat or something
if he loses its like he lost all his energy for a little while
he tries to fall asleep but cant due to a replay of something he did wrong
you always run your hand through his hair and try to calm him down
calm down as in cheer up not energy
at least until someone says something (usually tanaka) that gets him on another energy high to beat them next time
you always sleep over though it just happens so often that it became normal
Tssukishima Kei
before is fairly normal im ngl
he doesn’t do to much out of the ordinary
I like to think he’s a heck tone more affectionate in private 
his before game time isn’t anything special though 
he does come with you to the store to get snacks with yamaguchi more often tho so
thats something
after a game is really calm and slow
once again I think he’s a lot more affectionate in private so you lay on him while hes on his phone to calm down
half the time its calming you down since you were freaking out more than him
but same difference
this is what happens win or lose though
like if they lose and he tried he might lay on you instead but its normally just like that
honestly thinking of him being more affectionate in private just makes me fall for him ahhhhhh hate this but anyways
Tadashi Yamaguchi
this boy good lord
so before a game he literally shaking 
like he was fine the whole week but the day before he’s slowly freaking out more and more
tssuki will laugh at him while your trying your best to talk him out of his up coming panic attack that might come
a good light smack on his back and a cheek kiss is good enough to get him distracted fro thinking to much though
after a game is always the same thing unless he screwed up a serve really bad
you two always go to the store and gets some snacks and them go to his house and just talk about anything ad everything
if he wins its normally about the game but when he loses you bring up random things to cheer him up
if he messed up he’ll get quiet and just lay on you for hours
but you know that if you can get something about his amazing improvement he’ll eventually brighten up
bb just wants some love (that doesn’t mean you don’t smack him upside the head when he makes fun of someone tho 
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a/n: im sorry for not doing  kinoshita and narita i dont know them good enough since im not that far into season four to write for them. plus i think ennoshita is oc but thats ok i think
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