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risottostitties · 4 years

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Secret Santa!

I’m back from vacation woo!

This is a secret santa thing I participated in with @staruplatinum‘s discord. This is actually for @staruplatinum because I was her secret santa lol. I hope you enjoy it! I tried my best I promise!

Please check the tags before reading

Discovery

It was the third day in a row that Abbacchio had been awoken by the sound of vomiting from the bathroom connected to the room he shared with Nina. While normally such a sound wasn’t new to him, they both enjoyed their alcohol a bit too much if he was being honest, they hadn’t had any the previous night. Or the night before, out of concern that she might be getting sick. So the fact that Nina was waking up in the morning and immediately vomiting immediately put the lilac haired man on edge. What could be causing this? She didn’t feel feverish.

“Have you considered going to a doctor?” He asked, rolling out of bed to gently scoop his girlfriend’s hair out of the way as she heaved. They hadn’t eaten yet, so mercifully this spell of sickness would be brief.

It seemed like she was getting sick more and more often lately. Buccellati had to stop ordering shellfish because the smell made her sick.

“I already considered that, appointment’s this afternoon. I figured that if it was something important I’d tell you after.” Nina admitted, standing on shaky legs and flushing the toilet before going to clean her mouth out.

“Do that.” Abbacchio hummed, watching as she brushed her teeth with an expression softer that what people would expect out of a man like him.

It was hard not to feel soft, not to look at her with such complete adoration. After all, he’d never have anticipated finding himself in such perfect domesticity. It made this bout of illness all the more concerning for him. He hopped to hear nothing but good news from the doctor soon.

Month 3

Well, as it turns out, it was news alright.

“What do you want to do about this?” The unsure waver in Nina’s voice made his heart clench.

Pregnant.

She was pregnant, and unless there was something else going on it was his. According to the blood work, and the imaging she’d gone in for, she was about twelve weeks in, or approaching the end of the first trimester. There was time, theoretically, to end things before they became a real problem. Kids were never in the picture. In their line of work it was far too dangerous, and what’s more to have him as a father. To come into this world in the shadow of a failure such as himself. To grow up knowing your dad was not only a criminal but a coward and a disgrace as well; wasn’t that just too cruel?

What was he supposed to do? On one hand it would be easier to tell the kid everything from the start, to not allow them to idolize their father and grow up with the false notion that he was a man worthy of their admiration. If they were going to hate him anyway, why would he prolong the inevitable. Was it not cruel to allow the kid to build up a version of him in their head only to have it torn down as soon as they were able to investigate their father’s name?

Of course, this was assuming there would be a child at all.

“We should-“

“I want to keep them.” Nina’s voice prevailed over Abbacchio’s reluctant admission.

It startled him into silence.

“Why would-“ Why was he getting choked up. “It’s a bad idea, with our lives. They’ll be in constant danger.”

“We’re strong enough to protect them. Leone-“ Oh god, there she went. Using his first name. Even after all this time, he still felt his heart skip a beat when she said his name with such a reverent, adoring tone. “I want this. Us. Our family.”

Who was he to say no when she looked up at him like that. Eyes dewy, expression both hopeful and unsure. If he really wanted to, he could probably talk her out of it. But then for a brief second he pictured it. A little boy with her eyes and his nose, chubby and healthy in his mother’s arms. And he wanted it so much, it caused him to ache.

And although he was still wildly unsure… he found himself nodding.

“Our family.” He agreed, closing the distance between them with a quick step and leaning down to capture her lips with his.

He couldn’t tell if the salt he tasted was from her tears of his.

Month 4

Emotional announcement aside, Abbacchio still had his doubts about the whole pregnancy thing. Morning sickness was killer, and he couldn’t do much to fight off the mounting guilt when he awoke in the morning to his girlfriend hunched over the toilet heaving on an empty stomach. He did this to her after all.

But as though she could read his mind, Nina was always there to reassure him. And soon, he started to warm up to the idea of being a dad. Even as the cravings started to kick in and he found himself up at odd hours of the night, Leone Abbacchio couldn’t remember ever feeling happier. They had decided to keep it their little secret for as long as they could.

Their friends were good people, but they were loud people. And, something about the quiet domesticity the two of them shared together; the beginning of their own little family, something about that was just too nice to give up quite yet.

Although it was only a matter of time before someone found out.

Month 5

“Nina, did you want any wine with your meal?” Bruno’s good natured question caused the woman to pause, and for Abbacchio to tense up.

“Oh no, no thank you. Not this time.” Her response was just a touch nervous, and Bruno honed in on that like a blood hound. Sometimes his ability to read people was a curse to all of them.

“Is everything alright?” He asked, softly. A question that was quickly overshadowed by Narancia’s boisterous proclamation.

“You haven’t been drinking much either Abbacchio, what gives? Finally going back on the wagon?” The young man adjusted his bandana as he looked up from his homework. “Can’t manage without your little girlfriend?”

The smug smile on the teenager’s face immediately put Abbacchio in a bad mood, but instead of retaliating he simply reached for his glass of water. They had been told to try and reduce stress on Nina as much as possible, it wasn’t good for the baby. And Abbacchio snapping at people did little to relieve stress.

“None of your business.” He settled on that, which only seemed to fuel the fire.

“What, you pregnant or something Abbacchio?” It was meant as a joke obviously, but the silver haired man almost choked on his water; sputtering as he tried to catch his breath.

“Shit man I’m kidding! I didn’t think it’d get you that bad!” Mista was quick to offer his apologies, and a napkin.

“Abbacchio?” Bruno’s soft, but pointed question, left little room for the silverette to worm his way out of things.

Thankfully, Nina stepped in before he could mutter something under his breath.

“They’re due in December.”

And with that, all hell broke loose.

Month 6

Between the obnoxious ribbing from Narancia and Mista, there was a genuine happiness that filled the small private room in the back of their favorite restaurant. It wouldn’t be easy of course, raising a family in this kind of life. But with an army of over protective uncles it seemed like the kid would have a good start as any.

Nina was starting to really show now, as the doctor had warned them. Once the second trimester reached its end things would progress much faster than they had before. Nina had been removed from active duty because of her condition, something she protested greatly about. But Bruno would be hearing none of it. She had a child to nurture, he chided, she couldn’t be putting her life at risk anymore. Neither of them could. Soon, they would have someone very precious relying on them.

So both Nina and Abbacchio found themselves on ‘light duty’ so to speak. Abbacchio rarely rent on any dangerous jobs anymore. Bruno had taken to using Mista as his back up in Abbacchio’s place. Which, he supposed, was fine. Despite being dense, the gunslinger had a good head on his shoulders, and he was dependable. And, as much as the former police officer and his partner hated being left out of things it certainly wasn’t the case that they had nothing to do.

“I don’t have any fucking idea how this works. This is stupid, they won’t even remember the damned nursery why does it have to be so complicated? Just put them in a fucking box or something and be done with it.” He’d been working at this crib for over an hour now, and frankly Abbacchio was starting to lose his patience.

“Leone. If you imply our child deserves to sleep in a cardboard box in front of me one more time, you’ll be the one sleeping on a box.” Nina sat happily in a rocking chair (the first of many gifts from Godfather Bruno) munching on some plantain chips.

“Do you want to help then?” He asked, pulling back to adjust the bun he’d thrown his hair into.

“Hmm… no. I’m good thanks. I’m busy growing a foot.” Nina’s grin split wider at the exasperated expression on her partner’s face. “Besides, if you really hate the crib we can always co-sleep.”

The crib was finished later that evening.

Month 7

“So you don’t want to know the gender? Why not? It’d be a pain in the ass to buy all these new clothes if it turned out you had the wrong one.” Narancia asked, watching as Nina opened his gift.

Somehow he’d managed to get a baby onsie emblazoned with ‘All Eyez On Me’ album cover. Very much a little boy outfit. Complete with the sneakers and a hat.

“You fucking moron, this is why I told you to find something gender neutral. I knew I should have bought your present for you.” Fugo grumbled, shoving his present towards Nina next.

“Oh yeah, a strawberry outfit is totally gender neutral. What little boy would be caught dead in that?” Narancia snapped back, and Fugo jumped from his chair. The clattering sound made Nina wince.

“You spoiled my gift before she could open it you cretin! I’m going to end your whole bloodline you filthy fucking-“ And there he went, Fugo was pissed again.

“Oi! If you’re going to fight take it outside!” This, thought Abbacchio, was why they had tried to keep it a secret for so long.

Thankfully though, that seemed enough to stop any further altercations and Fugo muttered an apology before fixing his chair.

“You sound like a dad.” Mista joked, already on his second slice of cake.

“That’s because he is one. Thank you Narancia, Fugo, they’ll love the clothes.” Nina spoke, admiring the cute strawberry printed onsie (and lamenting the fact that it was mostly white, that wouldn’t last long) before putting it carefully with the other gifts.

Mista had given them blankets, five of them (a good number! He claimed) and had even taken the time to show Abbacchio how to swaddle a wine bottle in them. Apparently, Mista was quite good with kids. He never talked much about his former life, but he admitted to having several younger siblings. The ex cop found himself impressed. Although the thought of asking the gunslinger for any help made his stomach coil. Nina on the other hand, seemed to have none of those qualms.

“Mine’s a bit big. I’ll help you get it back to your apartment, but please open it here. I’d like to see what you think.” Bruno spoke up last, offering up a box larger than the others they’d seen before.

“You already bought most of the nursery furniture, Capo. You really didn’t have to get another gift!” It was true, as Nina had said. Bruno had taken it upon himself to furnish the nursery. They should be saving their money, he said, and he wanted to make sure his godchild had appropriate furniture.

“It’s the last one, I promise.” Abbacchio had the feeling it wasn’t the case, but as he helped Nina cut the tape off the box, those thoughts faded.

It was a mobile, with fish and boats and other aquatic creatures carefully hand crafted from wood with sea glass safely secured and dangling from fishing wire. It looked lovingly made and Abbacchio had to do a double take.

It wasn’t until after the party that he had the chance to ask Bruno what the deal was.

“Did you buy that yourself? The mobile. Its beautiful but, you didn’t have to go out of the way for that. The brat won’t remember it anyway.” He asked, taking one last cig break before he and Nina returned to their apartment.

“It was mine.” That gave the taller man pause. “My father held on to it. I found it in the attic a few years ago, and didn’t have the heart to throw it away. I’m happy to know it’ll get good use again. It deserves to be hung up, instead of collecting dust.”

“You should save it for your own kids.” Abbacchio spoke, before taking another drag and offering it to Bruno, who declined with a wave of his hand.

“It’s better put to use now, don’t you think?” Bruno’s expression was far off, and Abbacchio couldn’t read it. So instead of responding is simply shrugged, exhaling his final drag and putting the smoke out with his foot before returning to the restaurant to collect his pregnant partner.

Bruno followed and helped them load everything into the car. The unreadable expression gone from his face.

Month 8

It was getting close. Braxton Hicks contractions were starting to appear. They had scared the shit out of the two of them the first time it happened. It was far too early and they had panicked, rushing to the hospital despite having been told what to expect this late into the pregnancy.

Nervous energy was abound between the two of them. Nina was officially on bedrest. She had been getting weaker and the doctors erred on the side of caution. There was little to worry about, they assured, they just decided to be safer rather than sorry. Leone couldn’t disagree with that, although he was glad that the whole pregnancy thing was almost done. Nina looked like she would kill someone if she had to remain cooped up in their bedroom for too much longer.

It was late, and while Leone had stopped drinking in solidarity with Nina he couldn’t help but want a sip to calm his nerves. Instead though, he walked around the apartment (trying to mind his feet so he didn’t wake his sleeping partner, the pregnancy made her a light sleeper) and took stock of their little home. Their life together.

It was new, better than the one bedroom they’d shared. Bruno helped them get into a neighborhood with a good school. Their rent was affordable, and their neighbors were friendly. IT was all so domestic, it felt like a dream. Or a cruel prank. He half expected to wake up on the couch hungover but that had yet to happen.

He paused, looking into the nursery. Bruno’s mobile was strung up over the crib. The room was simple, white furniture with light blue walls. With the mobile they added a few more ‘nautical’ things into the décor. Striped sheets in the cribs, some bubble decals on the wall, but over all it was a simple and calming room. The shelves were lined with books and blocks and other baby toys, and the stuffed animals they had been gifted were safely tucked away out of the crib. In less than a month there would be someone living here.

Leone took a seat in the rocking chair and observed, not even noticing as he nodded off to sleep.

In the morning he awoke with a blanket covering him, and he got up. Nina had no business being on her feet covering up her idiot partner. Ah, partner. That needed to change soon. Husband sounded better. But that was for later. Once the kid was born, then Abbacchio could worry about making his girlfriend his wife. Some would say it was out of order.

Abbacchio hoped to encounter them one day so they could say it to his face. See how well that worked out for them.

Month 9

How did it come to this? How had he allowed it to come to this? Abbacchio knew the kind of man he was, the kind who took the cowards way out of things. The kind who would rather turn to underhanded bribes than admit the futility of his work. The kind of man who allowed an innocent man to die for his mistakes. The kind of man who fucked up everything he touched. It only stood to reason that someday, eventually, he would ruin this as well.

He should have put an end to this when the problem first reared its head. Instead here he was, taking a drag from a rancid cig he bummed off a nurse to try and take the edge off of things. It was snowing, almost Christmas. This would have been their first Christmas.

Everything was wrong.

It all happened so fast. Things were going fine, labor was long but not unnaturally so. It was about five hours in when the baby’s heart beat started dropping. Emergency c-section. She seemed fine. The baby came, a girl, shockingly enough. And then Nina started slurring her words. It all happened so fast, he was being rushed out of the room by a nurse and the last thing he heard was the slowing of a heart monitor.

Twenty minutes later a doctor came to offer his apologies, and a child. Abbacchio had turned and left then, unable to handle the weight of what just happened. Shoving past Bruno (the only one allowed to be there for the birth) he ran from the hospital; coward that he was. And here he found himself, smoking to try and… what? Numb something? He was already numb. The cold helped with that. Perhaps if he stayed out here long enough, he’d risk hypothermia. He’d be doing everyone a favor right, freezing to death outside the hospital. It was abundantly clear to Abbacchio that he ruined every good thing that had the misfortune of encountering him.

Perhaps it would be best if he vanished from this kid’s life before he had the chance to infect that too. Or perhaps he’d doomed the kid of a life full of hardship by virtue of being the son of a bitch that fathered it. Her. It was a her. They had a name picked out. It was-

“Are you going to keep the name Sophia?” The only person capable of piercing through Abbacchio’s haze of self-depreciation had come outside to meet him.

How Bruno managed to get the baby out of the hospital so soon after it was born, who knows. Or perhaps he just became numb to the passage of time along with the cold. How long had it been already? Who knows? Who cared. But there she was, bundled up tightly in her hospital blankets and Bruno’s own coat for good measure.

“I’m not keeping anything.” Abbacchio huffed a long drag from his cigarette, having the decency to at least blow away from his friend and the child he held.

“Leone.”

“Bruno.”

His friend’s normally gentle face was furrowed into an expression of distaste. Always so righteous, of course Bruno would take issue with his decision. He still clung to the belief that Abbacchio was worth something, a dangerous notion considering that now there was a child in the mix. Bruno was a smart man, but perhaps their friendship had blinded him to the reality of the situation-

“She loved you and Sophia very much, you of all people should know that.” Bruno tried, only for Leone to take another drag from the smoke.

“A horrible choice on her part.”

“Leone.”

“What, Bruno? What do you want?” That was it, Bruno had found Leone’s breaking point and fuck, if he wanted a reaction out of him so bad, he had it. “Do you want me to be on my knees bawling in the hospital room? Should I be clinging to her hand, shaking her body, begging for her to wake up? What kind of reaction would please you Bruno?”

He threw the cigarette down and stomped it into the slush.

“What am I supposed to do?” Abbacchio could hear his voice crack, knees hitting the cold snow as his legs gave out.

It was amazing, how quickly rage could turn to sadness. Nina had borne witness plenty of times, as had Bruno. This was nothing new for either man, but there was a certain weight to it now. Nina was gone. She wasn’t coming back. If she were here she would be on her knees with him. She’d hold him close, let him scream into her shoulder and cling to her hard enough to bruise (something he always felt horrible for after). And in the end, she’d be there to fix his makeup. Sometimes they’d both need to touch things up; she wound up crying with him.

He’d have her sit on the bathroom counter as he fixed the delicate wing of her eyeliner. They’d tease each other over their puffy eyes and still runny nose. It was like a ritual between them almost, doing each other’s makeup. It wouldn’t happen again though, and the realization washed over him like a cold wave. He missed the numbness then, as he choked out an undignified sob. It was so much easier to be numb.

“Leone.” He could hear the crunch of slushy snow in front of him as Bruno knelt, careful not to jostle the child too much. She was already getting fussy from her father’s loud outburst. “I can’t help you. You need to help yourself. But I can be there for you, and for Sophia.”

“I’ll fuck that up too.” Abbacchio managed, unable to lift his eyes from the ground to look at the child beginning to fuss in Bruno’s arms. She already hated him it seemed. The sound of his voice was enough to make her squirm in discontent. He couldn’t blame Sophia.

“Sophia doesn’t seem to think so.” Bruno’s soothing voice did little to calm the infant, but it began to work on Abbacchio. The tears had yet to dry, but a feeble hiccup signaled the end of his sobbing.

“She’s trying to get away from me.” As if on cue the baby squirmed more, turning her head from her father.

“I think she’s just scared.” Bruno corrected, shifting the baby in his arms. “Leone, try holding her.”

“What?” That caused Leone to snap to attention. “You can’t be serious.”

He had very little time to react though, as Bruno deposited the infant into his arms. Abbacchio had to fumble a bit to support the head, but once things were in order it felt almost… natural.

He stood then, trying to dry what wsa left of his tears off on his shoulder. The kid looked kinda like both parents. She had some wispy pale hairs. Were those from him? Or would she grow dark hair like her mother? Sophia was still fussy, a spirited little thing it seemed, and although her eyes were mostly shut against the cold he could see the tiniest little sliver of purple and gold. She had his eyes.

She had. His eyes.

It was a simple realization, nothing remarkable. It didn’t do anything to quell the ache growing more and more apparent in the place in his heart Nina had occupied. It didn’t lead to any grand epiphany of how he was going to handle the future without her at his side. Nina had been his rock, his confidant, the person he loved most in the world and the one person capable of making Abbacchio see through the haze of self-loathing to imagine a better future. And she was gone. There was nothing that could replace her, and he didn’t want anything to replace her. If he hurt, it meant that she had been there once, right? The fact that her passing left such gaping hole was proof, in its own way, that she had really loved him. And that he, the failure Leone Abbacchio, had been capable to returning that love. Worthy of accepting that love.

And the physical proof was here in his arms. A mixture of Nina and himself. A gift that she had lavished so much time and love on, and had worked so hard to bring into the world. And what a job she did. Sophia was healthy, and energetic if the way she squirmed was any indication. Nina would have been so proud, so happy to have been her mother. Sophia couldn’t replace Nina. She couldn’t do anything to fill the voice her mother left behind. But it was strange, there was a new spot now. A new hole, but instead of emptiness it overflowed. He had to take a shaky breath to try and steady himself. It was overwhelming, the feelings of grief and loss and love mixing together. He could feel himself crying again, although for a new reason.

“Leone?” Bruno asked, having gotten up out of the slush himself.

“I’ll try.” It was all Abbacchio could manage as he again used his shoulders to try and dry his face. It was enough though, and as the new father began to bounce his daughter to try and soothe her, the two men headed back into the hospital together.

#my writing #leone abbacchio #abbacchio #jjba #jjba writing #jjba self insert #selfship #jjba part 5 #Vento Aureo #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #jojo kimyou na bouken #pregnancy #death #death during childbirth #birth

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lotornomiko · 4 years

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Light Grasping Darkness Chapter Five (Of Six Sorta in between work safe and not worksafe...)

Emma POV...almost to the end...!

It was stupid of her to have stopped. Hesitation of any kind would most likely get her killed, and even understanding that, Emma had still done it all the same. Wanting, NEEDING one last look at the pirate, emotions bubbling within her, words freezing in her throat at the sight of him. Not that Emma had known what to say in this situation. A situation that STILL felt unreal, Emma having had what amounted to the most intense, insane, greatest and ultimately tiring sex of her life. And with a pirate of all things. With captain fucking Hook, the man a story book legend of at least several worlds.

Of course the books had NEVER come close to mentioning Hook's attractive charm and appeal, his flirtatious ways, or the fact that he was amazing as a lover. No, the books hadn't touched upon that, or the sculpted perfection of his body, his rugged yet handsome dark looks, or the way his eyes turned black in sexual frenzy as he growled and fucked his way to climax.

It was a look that was now seared into her brain, that and dozens upon dozens of other intimacies Emma knew that she would never forget. She had been woefully unprepared for the reality of Captain Hook, for the attraction that had blazed between them from the start, and just as unprepared to learn that fairy tales didn't stop at just a kiss. She had her tired body as proof of that, bruised and sore in places that had been well used.

Emma hurt, and it didn't have all to do with overused muscles. Her feelings were stirred, conflicted and confused, ready to blur the line between lust and love. She had a connection now with Hook, forged in the heat of hours passed, the sex offering up a tenacious bond that could either be strengthened or shattered.

Confused as she was, Emma wasn't sure which extremes she leaned towards. Resentment actually curled inside her, Emma knowing that the situation she and Hook found themselves in, didn't allow room for a choice to be freely made. Because so long as Hook was the Dark One and under that terrible compulsion to kill her, that fledgling bond of theirs could only break.

Emma didn't know what the future held. Didn't know if she even had a future left to her. The frustration bloomed within her, Emma realizing she would never get to follow through on the messy complications caused by having mad, passionate, ultimately fantastic sex with Captain Hook. And it wasn't fair! Even if he was an over confidant, aggravating, and downright smug pirate, even if she didn't trust in happily ever after, or believe in true love's kiss, they should have had the right, the chance to make it or break it together.

Her eyes conveyed many things, a sad need in them. Hook's gaze showed he was suffering similar to Emma. They hadn't blurred the line, confusing sex for love, but they both were wanting more. A chance for something, anything other then what Cora and Regina would decide for them.

And then Hook was snapping at her, a hard edge to his expression that hadn't been there before. "Go!" He ordered of her, and flinching, the woman turned and ran out of the room. Her mind and feelings might be all torn up, but her emotions' conflict didn't stop her self preservation instincts from kicking in. Emma ran, keeping her hand on the hilt of her borrowed sword.

The smooth wood beneath her sock covered feet, made the way slippery. Her legs felt like jelly, in no condition to truly hold her up, let alone allow Emma to maintain running for very long. She slipped, slid, and stumbled her way through a narrow corridor, noting the sway of the floor, and realized she was on a ship just moments before she climbed the last step to the deck of what had to be the Jolly Roger.

Thankful that the ship hadn't been put out to sea, Emma's heart still constricted painfully in her chest at the sight of Storybrooke's harbor. It might be familiar ground, but the harbor was located almost exactly opposite of where she had to be, Emma knowing there was only one place she could go. Only one place that would be safe or so she hoped, Emma knowing she had to leave Storybrooke, actually cross it's magical and cursed boundary. Once past it, even if the Queens followed, their magic would become useless, stripping them of any real power. And their memories too, if Emma was really lucky.

It was a long shot in more ways than one. Emma hoped for the Queens to be cursed, to follow and lose everything, their magic, their memories, their evil. But if they couldn't, if things remained as they were, Emma and her family would have no choice but to leave Storybrooke. An idea that HURT, for Storybrooke had actually become home to Emma. It wasn't just the town, but the people who made up its population, the friends Emma cared about, the people she had protected for over a year's time as their sheriff. Emma might lose all that, AND the love of the parents she had only just begun to know, for David and Mary Margaret had no protection from the boundary's curse. They would forget their daughter, forget who they really were, even forget the danger that stalked them.

But for now Emma pushed aside thoughts of that, and the difficulties that would accompany her parents losing their true memories. She had to focus on getting to the town's limits, to luring her enemies to cross over after her. And she wasn't going to get far on foot, Emma cursing under her breath as she realized her car keys were in her pocket. Her jeans' pocket, the denim lost somewhere amid the mess of Hook's bedroom cabin floor.

Emma almost slowed, almost turned back the way that she had come. And it hadn't been all out of the desire to get her keys. Not when she had excitement thrumming through her at the mere thought that she would get to see him again. Excitement that couldn't be dimmed by the truth, by the knowledge that Emma would be risking her life to venture back into the pirate's den.

Recognizing she had been screwed in more ways than one, Emma continued her running. She was off of Hook's ship, and now running on the concrete of the harbor's grounds. Running in the direction that would lead to main street, to Gold's shop, to where her car was parked nearby. Hoping she would have enough of a head start to hot wire her own car, and hating the girlish impulses that had Emma wanting to imagine anything good could come of encountering Hook a second time.

Ever a practical woman, Emma forced herself to push aside her thoughts and foolish wants. She made herself think not on Hook, on what they had just shared, on what could have come as a result of it, and instead focused on her present. On the objectives she gave herself. Get to her car. Hot wire it. Then drive like a mad woman, breaking all known traffic laws to get to the town's limits. Worry about David and Mary Margaret later, hoping they were safe with Henry and Ruby, and that they hadn't been forced to cross over the cursed boundary early.

Emma almost made it to phase two of her plan, actually had her hand on the door of her beloved yellow car, when it happened. Her skin tingled with awareness, hairs raising on the back of her neck, and then she was spinning, Hook's borrowed sword in her hand. The naked metal gleamed with the shine of the street's spotlights, slicing through air and slamming into flesh. She felt as much as heard Hook's surprised grunt, the pirate not having tried to block or deflect her blade's attack.

"Hook!" She gasped like a fool, her heart's beat yammering away in her chest.

His eyes were a tormented blue, so sad and ridden with pain that had nothing to do with the wound her sword had inflicted into his flesh. Emma found it an ill fitting expression, Hook a man who should have been full of light and laughter, his eyes twinkling with mischief. Not looking so bleak and defeated, so tortured over what he had been made to do.

"Run." He said, not bothering with the sword in his side. His hand was gripping her arm, pulling Emma way from her car. Practically flinging her away from him, Hook sounding desperate as he repeated his urgings. "Emma quickly, run!"

She stumbled on the sidewalk, before gaining a steady footing. Nodding, Emma began to run, tossing back over her shoulder words at Hook to fight it. To fight the compulsion the queens had forced on him. She didn't get a reply, Hook busy making sounds, tortured moans chasing after her as the pirate fought against Cora's command.

The sounds made her chest tighten, Emma feeling for Hook. Feeling for his pain, for the agony he was going through, and that was before he screamed. Still running, Emma turned to look over her shoulder, and ran into something solid. Dread hit her, Emma knowing without looking that it was the pirate she had run into. Hook with his black leather, his sea salt taste, his spicy after shave, and a body she would forever now recognize by the fit, the feel of it against hers.

Wanting to melt against him, but stiffening instead, Emma tried to back away. But Hook was grabbing at her, his hand on her arm, his hook at her back. Locking her in a steel embrace, effortlessly pressing her wildly struggling body against his. He held her while Emma fought, trying to get a leg up, attempting to smash their heads together, anything to get free. She accomplished nothing save to tire herself out, Emma red faced and panting, her chest heaving in a painful manner.

"Emma, I'm sorry." Hook said, and it was made worse because he meant it.

"Fight it!" Emma cried out, her eyes flashing with desperation.

"I...I can't..." Hook whispered, his skin looking so pale with the admission. "I just don't have the strength anymore..."

"Damn you!" But she was sagging in his embrace, too tired to truly do anything more. She hadn't had enough sleep, wasn't getting enough air, was hurting too much all over. Emma was almost reaching the point of not caring, the last of her thoughts being devoted to Henry and her parents. Wishing they had enough time, hoping a cursed David and Mary Margaret would listen to and take seriously Henry's warnings.

Whispering apologies of her own, Emma thought her eyes were playing tricks on her, when the area around them blurred together. She shifted at Hook's voice, hearing him apologize once more, but from a distance.

"I'm sorry Emma. The orders have changed. I have to bring you to them..."

She let out a bitter sound at that, thinking that Regina probably wanted the satisfaction of killing Emma with her own hands. The dark haired queen would probably spend an insane amount of time gloating, bragging about how she would now be the only mother that Henry would ever know. Twisting the knife deeper in Emma, making her sick with the knowledge that her son, Henry, might end up stuck in the care of that spiteful, hateful woman forever.

The idea made her sick, but also angry, Emma standing up straighter in Hook's embrace. Willing herself to be tough, to be ready, arming herself with a sarcastic wit, and her fiercest glare. Making ready to face Regina one last time, to die with her spirit intact. Emma didn't think she stood a chance of surviving, but she would do her best to fill Regina with doubts, with fears and uncertainties about the kind of life she would have with Henry. Because Emma was certain that happily ever after would elude the woman. It had to, because Henry would never be able to love the woman who had killed his mother. She would be a monster in his eyes, and Emma would make her understand that in no uncertain terms.

Reality shimmered as she thought this, the dizzying effects of Hook's teleportation magic lessening, as the colors around them solidified into shapes. The familiar looking couch made her gasp, Emma recognizing this place as the apartment she shared with her son and her parents. A place she hadn't ever expected to see again, and Mary Margaret's glad shout wasn't so much music to Emma's ears, as the herald of the chaos that would follow.

Emma looked into Hook's eyes, seeing the confusion there mirrored her own. Her lips started to part, to ask Hook a question he surely didn't have the answer to. And then sound rushed in, Emma hearing a man, her father, shouting in a commanding tone of voice.

"Let her go, Hook!"

Immediately the arms around her loosened. Emma still stared at Hook, still did noting but stand there. Soft hands snatched at her arm, Emma being dragged from Hook's arms. She stumbled in the direction pulled, trying to turn when a woman pressed against her. Hugging her fiercely, nearly weeping in relief, Mary Margaret actually trembling as she held onto her daughter.

Stiff back and full of tension, Emma stared past her mother at Hook. He hadn't taken his eyes off the blonde, not even to acknowledge the approaching man. It wasn't until David was right in front of Hook, that the pirate truly looked at him, and only for a second before the prince was throwing a bone crunching punch.

Emma cried out when David's fist connected with Hook's face. She swore she saw red flecked spittle fly in the air, thought she felt the gathering of malevolent energies. She prepared herself to see Hook lash back at her father, actually tried to take a step in that direction. But Mary Margaret's hold went from comforting hug to restraining hold, the woman trying to keep her daughter out of what was happening.

Emma fought her, almost violent in her attempts to jerk free. Mary Margaret had no trouble holding on. Emma was simply too tired, too sore, too full of aches, to be at full strength. She felt weak, actually swayed as though she might faint, her eyes fluttering rapidly as David punched Hook a second time.

"Don't!" Emma cried out, but no one understood she was begging BOTH men to not take things any further.

Hook met her worried gaze, Emma thinking he would at least listen to her. But then David landed a third punch, and Hook snapped. He struck out with his arm, backhanding David across the face. He didn't try to temper his strength, the prince actually being thrown across the room. He landed against a counter in the kitchen, and something clattered to the floor with a loud echo of sound.

Expecting Hook to go for David, Emma was shocked when the pirate froze, staring transfixed at something on the floor. Not knowing what it could be, not daring to hope for any other result, Emma turned in Mary Margaret's grip. Her gaze went not to her father, who was unsteadily using the counter to help himself up off the floor, but the thing that had made that loud echoing sound.

It was too big to be a simple kitchen knife, too short to be a sword. It was in fact a dagger, but not just any one. It was the Dark One's dagger, the thing that both controlled him, and could kill him. That David had it wasn't as confusing as Emma might have thought, the woman realizing something major had had to have gone down. Something that had allowed the weapon to change hands, to give them the advantage they hadn't had before. Emma almost wanted to cry, so relieved to see the dagger was no longer in the queens' possession, even as she wanted to scream at her parents for risking themselves like that.

She never got the chance to do either, David and Hook exchanging a look. Tension crackled in that look, a split second decision made. Both of them moved, Hook almost faster than the eye could see, David lunging desperately for the dagger but still too slow. Hook was set to snatch the dagger off of the floor, when out of nowhere a burst of blue energy struck just before his hand.

With a wild sounding snarl, Hook pulled back his arm, whirling in place to track where that magic had come from. The dagger itself was airborne, David making a grab for it. and missing, It somersaulted slowly, almost as though it was floating instead of falling, and eventually landed in the palm of a feminine hand.

Silence followed, Emma blinking in stunned surprise. And it was a surprise, Storybrooke's Mother Superior having materialized from nothing to appear before them. Dressed in a nun's habit, the woman looked the picture of severe grace. However the blue tipped wand she held in her right hand, was completely out of place with her holy robes.

"It is done." She announced with a serene smile. The tension immediately whisked out of Mary Margaret, the woman almost swooning in place, relying on her daughter for support. Emma had no idea what had been done, and looked around the room, noting David still looked like he wanted to attack Hook.

As for the pirate, he seemed frozen in place, gritting his teeth in annoyance, but otherwise making no moves. His eyes were on the Mother Superior, his gazed riveted by the dagger she still held.

Shifting in place, Emma drew their attention to her, as she cleared her throat loudly. "Would someone be so kind as to tell me what the fuck is going on!?" Her no nonsense tone was meant to get answers, not cause Mary Margaret to start shaking with a laughter that was half sobbing.

"It's a long story." Mary Margaret managed to say, and Emma almost laughed and cried too, because she realized they now all had the time to hear such a lenghty tale.

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To Be Continued....

#once upon a time #OUAT #cs ff #fanfiction #fanfic #emma swan #killian jones x emma swan #Killian Jones #captain hook #Captain Swan #season 2 cannon divergence #Light Grasping Darkness

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shadowdragonlost-blog · 6 years

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Spyro Reignited Wishes; then Skylanders Academy Predictions (Then More Game Stuff)

I decided to do something really stupid, and try and post about three different things in one post because I guess a really long read is something that nobody has complained about yet. I am sorry in advance for the nightmarish amount of text you will see, and tell me not to do this in the future if you’d prefer one thing at a time. I will probably avoid doing this again in the future. I am sorry in advance, and I tried to mark the transitions from one topic to another heavily so you could just skip to what you want.

1. ———-With the Reignited Trilogy coming closer to being just around the corner; everyone who isn’t an original series Nazi — an original series fan that believes that just porting the original series to the PS4 is the only thing that can be done with this series that isn’t punishable by murder — is really exited to get their hands on the Spyro that predates all other Spyros. With that exitement however, many people have come to hope for and even beg Toys for Bob for any reveals on any of the new features they could’ve added, and hope that the Reignited Trilogy is getting all of the love that the N’Sane, and from what we’ve seen so far; from being in development for over two years longer than the N’Sane Trilogy because it was actually being developed at the same time if not early than the N’Sane Trilogy started to having revamped cutscenes and a reactive development team that gives what the fans ask for through hard work, the Reignited Trilogy seems to be receiving more love than the N’Sane Trilogy.

This love that is being given to the Original Spyro has given many of us a list of things that we may have come to hope for or expect (or hate the idea of if you are an Original Spyro Nazi). My list of wishes are as follows:

•Playable Cynder and/or Ember: First thing, because Crash had an extra playable character added for after the game was beaten, this is then followed by the Original Series having had done this before in later installments, and is made more likely through being probably THE MOST REQUESTED THING OF THE REIGNITED TRILOGY BY FANS OF THE LEGEND SERIES. So yeah, may actually be a thing.

•The addition of deleted content: Crash obtained his stormy ascent, and Spyro likely had many worlds that were removed due to either difficulty or time constraints, and as much as all files on the original series were lost by Insomniac, it’s original developers could definitely tell them about deleted content and abandoned ideas.

•A Crash Easter Egg?: Spyro and Crash were best friends after all, so having him show up in an Easter Egg or level could be pretty fun.

•Keeping the Adaptive Difficulty Algorithms: This one is more so one of my hopes for this Trilogy. The Original Spyro Trilogy was technologically ahead of its time in way more ways than one (outside of being two years late to the 3D Platforminng Genre), one of these wonders of technology that this game boasted was how its enemy AI would actually adapt to how good you were at the game, making it absolutely brutal for the pros of the series, and extremely easy for those who struggled with it more often, so every player would actually witness different levels of difficulty for each boss and enemy.

Even though Crash Bandicoot is difficult to start with and understand the full extent of its physics, all of its characters and bosses followed set paths, and for someone who is experienced at playig Crash Bandicoot, and has memorized the boss-paths; it is actually really easy to do a zero-deaths run of any level, boss, or even the entire game after having had played it before. Each of the Original Trilogy Spyro games would actually become more difficult the better you bacame at the game; requiring a more in-depth knowledge of characters and levels by a long-shot if you plan on beating the game without a single death, each of the enemies starting to react within periods of time that aren’t possible for some random player to just pick up and play against. So as much as people talk about how hard Crash is for them, they’re forgetting that the original Spyro trilogy was only easy for them because they sadly (and bluntly) weren’t probably that exceptional at playing it, and also probably because it does begin at an average difficulty level that was designed for anyone to just be able to play; so a lot of people probably didn’t have the difficulty raise too much for them. But yeah; I want the Reignited trilogy to show off one of its technological marvels that people today probably wouldn’t even try to develop or implement in the greatest of AAA games.

2. —————As one of the many people who enjoyed Skylanders Academy, and really payed way too much to the lore of it and similarities it showed to the stories of other Spyros, I have a few predictions for season three that I can pretty much guarantee and would maybe even be willing to bet money on with the confidence and evidence that I have for these. With the Third season being released a month after the Reignited Trilogy, the fall of 2018 will be the season of Spyro. But keep in mind that I have avoided leaks, so any of this could’ve been leaked or disproven without my knowledge.

•A Bloodlines Episode: As much as that episode will not be called Bloodlines, their will most-definitely be an episode where Malefor and Cynder will be having some father daughter time (in the middle of Cynder being pissed); while Eon reveals the truth about Spyro and his history to the rest of the Skylanders; all while Kaos tries to have some father-son moments with Strykore. This episode will entail why Malefor hates purple dragons so much, and him telling that story to Cynder (which will 100% reveal that Cynder’s mother was a purple dragon; who probably died protecting the core of light from all of the dark-form purple dragons, or became corrupted as well. I can guarantee this because of Cynder’s color, her retaining her dark purple scales even though Malefor never corrupted her with Aether in this series, he’s just a black dragon who cares deeply for his biological daughter; so with him being black; Cynder’s mother would have to be purple. So that is definitely a reveal to look for). Though this reveal of Cynder’s mother will likely then be followed-up by a Dark Spyro visit (just because individual episodes tend to have themes that they stick to, and Spyro is convinced that Malefor knows how to find his family, and will definitely show back up to find out).

Stealth Elf and the other Skylanders will probably end the episode determined to find a way to either bring the purple dragons back so they could save Spyro (knowing how he’ll be looking for them), or they will either abandon Eon and his cause for having had lied, or forgive him and prepare to fight Strykore and Kaos to the bitter end. This may also include Eon revealing his relations to Kaos, but if so then this episode may be the forst or second one of season three.

Kaos will likely fail in trying to have his father spend time with him, and will hold that deep in his heart to be triggered later; pushing him to turn against his father when it is needed of him most; either making him worse than his father was, or and antagonistically-neutral character at the end of season three (which may be the last season)

•Saving Spyro: This one is the more complicated part of predicting season three, and that is because there are several ways in which it could play-out; each with similar or different saviors.

Cynder saves Spyro: The case behind Cynder being the one who saves Spyro can be seen heavily from all of the similarities that their relationship in Skylanders Academy has compared to the relationship that The Legend Trilogy Spyro and Cynder have with each other. But there is a twist in that, in every similarity in this relationship, the roles have been reversed between them. So Spyro’s because you have left me nothing to fight for scene can become Cynder’s; since he was the only thing that really gave her reason to be a Skylander. There is also the fact that she is likely a half-breed purple dragon, meaning that she would actually have light to give/bring to him in his darkness. Making her the most-ideal character to save him if the stick to their legend series references and self-established lore of how light works in their own series. Their is only one other character who could fit this role as well as Cynder could, and that is before considering how Cynder is the only character who has lived on both the sides of bad and good, and she learned and accepted how she could be a Skylander in spite of being groomed to be evil. She of all characters knows that anyone could be saved, and if they really want to sell the reflections of the Legend Series; they would have her stop at nothing to save him, this may force her to face both the Skylanders and Strykore though. Hell; she may even join with Kaos for a time just to try and get close enough to be able to reach Spyro.

Cynder saves Spyro when he visits Malefor: So dark Spyro will eventually visit Malefor in season three if not the other way around. Cynder will be in Malefor’s custody when that happens; meaning that she will definitely play a large role in the endgame. So how this will go will be; Spyro likely gets violent, one way or another it becomes a duel between him and Cynder in which she either loses or refuses to fight, does either the inversion of the Legend series Dark Cynder Spyro fight from DotD, or she uses her light to purify him knowing that she’s a half purple dragon now, or a mixture of both. This will either leave Cynder in a weakened or ill state forcing Spyro to apologize and find some way to bring her to the core of light, or she’ll be fine and the story will continue.

Cynder saves Spyro when he his fighting at the core of light: Similar to the last one, just theyre all at the core of light and Spyro and Cynder end up alone in the battle one way or another, repeat all thr stuff from the last one and bam, Spyro is himself again.

Cynder and Stealth Elf save Spyro at the core of light battle: Since Stealth Elf is Spyro’s best friend in this series, just pair up her value of Spyro and desperation to likely save him with the stuff from earlier revolvin Cynder and you’ll have a saved Spyro with two of the most important if not the two current most important people to him there by his side for him to apologize to and finish the final battle.

Stealth Elf saves Spyro: Stealth Elf is Spyro’s closest friend, so with that being a main theme; Stealth Elf alone is a candidate to save him, not as ideal as Cynder and Eon, but she can. She might use water from the core of light, but otherwise the power of friendship is all I can really say.

Stealth Elf at the core of light: Just read the one before, and You’ll know why this is the only location that Stealth Elf alone will be able to save Spyro, because the core of light is the only place where she can restore his light, her not being one of the three beings that just has pure light within them.

Spyro’s Skylander team saves him: Because of the themes of family within this show, the team that traveled with Spyro throughout Skylanders Academy is really the most expectable group for the show to use for anyone who doesn’t Overdose on researching and studying the lore of series like I do. They are a great candidate provided Skylanders Academy wants to just plot-armor the word “family” over all of the lore and character forshadowing that the developers did throughout the first and second seasons. It will still fit the themes of Skylanders Academy though.

Spyro’s Skylander team saves him at the core of light: This is the only area where the team detailed earlier could save Spyro in a lore-friendly way without the help of Cynder or Eon.

Eon saves Spyro: A lot like why Cynder will probably save Spyro, Spyro’s internal struggles are 100% Eon’s responsibility, and he is one of the three characters that we have seen who is a being that contains pure light (Spyro, Cynder from her mom, and Eon); so he would be a great light-giving candidate, but there would be a price to that. Master Eon (as we saw in season one) cannot expose himself to darkness on a great scale, and cannot expend his light without falling deathly ill. So if we wanted an Ignitus in Skylanders Academy who wanted to do right by Spyro even if just once, Eon would likely sacrifice himself to restore Spyro.

Eon is killed: This doesn’t need an explanation, Eon either dies from sacrificing himself, or he is killed by Strykore or Spyro.

What I believe will happen: Knowing the themes of family and friendship; while also keeping all of the Legend Series themes and concepts that are apparent and repeating in Skylanders Academy. Spyro’s team will likely try to save him, but will either fail or give up thinking that he may be too far gone. So they will likely start to relentfully view him as an enemy. Then will come the involvement of either Cynder or Eon to save him; I can almost guarantee Cynder will be the one to save him, because Eon likely shouldn’t die, and also because Cynder is the only character in the series outside of Spyro who has walked on both the dark and the light, and possesses a very unique knowledge of how one can choose to be evil, and can be saved from that, so she will likely either give him her light (some or all, either could happen), after having to either face him with the Skylanders, or face the Skylanders to be able to get him to open up to her enough in his dark form. But yeah; she’ll definitely be saving him; I want to go out on a limb and say that she’ll have to abandon her father and the Skylanders in the process; while also facing Kaos. Of course this series may not go that far, but I’m going to say that will happen, because that will enable Spyro and Cynder to save all of Skylands with Stealth Elf and the rest of the team helping as needed if they aren’t incapacitated, but it will also reflect a very specific condition that I will explain right below this.

•A large part of Skylanders Academy was how it had its own twist on the Legend of the Purple Dragon, in the Legend Series, Malefor and Spyro were Eternal (meaning cannot die at all), and in Skylanders Academy spyro had invulnerable scales, and both Spyros are said to have many more powers. But there is one confirmed power of the Legend Series Spyro that is known by fans as Convexity, and by the game files as Aether. It is one of the many powers that Spyro possesses in the Legend series that makes him as rediculously powerful as he was at the age of fourteen in Dawn of the Dragon (that and being unable to die), but his Aether powers had one twist to them; they were able to be accessed through a balance between dark and light; his dark form being a result of losing himself to the darkness of his heart and emotions and being overcome by dark Aether (along with his critically untreated depression that he only had a hold over with Cynder), but there was no real side-effect of being overcome by light and light-related emotions, unless if love overcoming him with light is what roided his heart into repairing the planet. It was also this power that he used to purify Cynder and restore her at the end of A New Beginning. Meaning that Cynder in Skylanders Academy could maybe even unlock this power; if not use it to save Spyro.

If Skylanders Academy was to use a twist on that power to defeat Strykore, then they would be bringing a lot of their lore full-circle, most of Spyro’s lore in Skylanders Academy being a modified version of the Legend Series Spyro’s lore after all, but the only question is; what would they change about Spyro’s Convexity/Aether powers before revealing them in Skylanders Academy? Cause if they kept them how they are now; then Spyro himself would never be able to use them outside of a few set circumstances; with Aether powers requiring a balance between darkness and light where Spyro is always either a being of 100% pure light or 100% darkness he would never be able to use them unless if he was able to becoming a being of both dark and light. Though with Aether being the one superpower that by its own nature should be able to accomplish anything; it will likely be required to save the Skylands. But there is one gem of a character who fits the requirements for Aether as they were in the Legend Series, and that gem is Cynder; with her mom being a Purple Dragon and her father being the ruler of the underworld; she would be a being of perfect balance between darkness and light by birth and nature. That would make her the perfect candidate to save the Skylands or even Spyro with her Aether powers. She could even try to restore Spyro with her light, which would then place either both of them at 75% dark 25% light, or she will abandon all of her light to save him; leaving Spyro at the perfect balance needed to save the Skylands, but then he would have to clutch a Cynder as she either falls to darkness, or fights desperately to remain herself; then Eon could show up and sacrifice his light to both restore Cynder to her perfect balance and bring Spyro back to 100% percent, or he could leave spyro and cynder at perfect balances and stay at a 50% light 50% neutral state, and then the series will likely end with Spyro either rejoining the Skylanders with Cynder, bringing Cynder with him to save the purple dragons if not going alone, or leave the Skylanders and become a guardian figure of perfect balance between darkness and light either along or with Cynder who shares the same description. Who knows; I’m just babbling on about what’s possible with the lore of the series.

3. ——————GAME STUFF: I said I would like input on game names and stuff, so here I am asking. The game that you’ve all been seeing some random map sketches from is the second game on my development list, but it hasn’t been named yet. The inspiration for the games initial idea was actually my frustration with the pokemon series... I was frustrated with all of the limits that the game series placed on everything, from levels to training to even relationship development; so I started to create a Bestiary that had creature stats and growths plotted out heavily, and I have been trying to design personality types and creature interaction concepts. With creatures ranging from single-stage to five-stage creatures with each one being able to train their stats infinitely in their final stage. I wanted all of the evolutions to be locked-out be relationship level requirements at certain stages, and I wanted there to be main character creatures that would be with you throughout the entire game. So I started designing a creature game that will do all of that. I’ve gotten most of the story concepts down and rough story guidelines for individual characters and main-character creatures, but the back-of-game-case-summary will be a little like this: “Join Xavier on his journey through an alternate world with his otherworldy dragonling Fry as he befriends creatures, slays fiends, and tries to discover his purpose in discovering Fry and traveling to Alterium” or something like that. But yeah, it will feature befriending characters and creatures (no capturing); Xavier and all of the player-characters will actually participate in combat with their creatures; even though they will be significantly weaker than their creatures, and you all should expect concept art for this once I’m confident enough to start posting it. So please send me any name ideas that you come up with for this game, and I will ask for approval on any that I may come up with.

All of you have a wonderful night, and tell me what you think about any or everything I may have said here. You should even feel free to comment as you see fit.

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maneaterwithtail · 6 years

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Why I likely will not love, just like Pearl and her series

I tend to like the characters people hate. Asoka made perfect sense for me from the beginning. I even like jar jar and love midi-chlorians. Overall when I dislike someone it's usually when righteousness is afforded to them as opposed to them just being annoying especially if theire annoying this is treated as if it's annoying. As an example I don't actually hate Korra from Legend of Korra I'm just frustrated with its writing and her fan base.

Though I suppose if there is a main character that I dislike in Steven Universe it's Pearl. In no small part there's her fans because chances are there were 'pressed or budding queerfolk who view any attack on her as an attack on the entire concept of their identity. The fact that she's painstakingly tied into said Rebel lesbian identity while often referencing revolutionary girl utena which in my opinion did a much better job handling that as an identity / phenomena

But I don't have any real rational reasons. There's this one moment in this one episode that permanently pissed me off about ttheshow, months later it was still pissing me off. Okay this wasn't the first time this had happened with the sshow. at one point you would receive extra canonical material or the characters be characterized one way and then when it was necessary for the plot characterized another way. A popular one is when Pearl said she can't stand eating so that that way she doesn't become present at a parent get together which causes some really annoying hijinks. But that's just one episode. no, what really collapsed my suspension of disbelief for her as a character and required me to desperately not think she was a real character but just a series of events that did whatever the episode wanted her to?

"What is a sch-ool?"

To be clear this is an alien being who comes from another planet where they have temples. They understand the purpose of Arenas in which to fight for displaying to martial prowess. And she has a 14 year old human son. She's been on Earth for thousands of years. Also she doesn't just know how to operate a motor vehicle and repair one she talks explicitly about traffic laws these cannot be any older than 200 plus years. Despite all of this she does not know what a school is a human practice that has been practiced for thousands of years

That moment, right there, completely destroyed all credibility as a character. She'll have emotional moments that she evokes very well. Because they give her some pretty solid writing and her actress does a damn fine job. But that does not matter because they've basically told me in certain terms that she is made of stupid writing trying to be witty. Whenever they want to make her alien they will make her inexplicably alien and Incredibly dumb to make a plot go forward. Whenever they want to make her too traumatized they will make her too traumatized to justify some bullshit. It's everything I Hate About Mary Sue writing ( even though she is most certainly not a Mary Sue.) Arbitrary in order to evoke audience sympathy rather than earn it and ignore consistency with either setting or character. I don't even hate her that much it's just when they say care about her that I can't do it. I'm always at an enormous divide whenever they try to center on the character.

again this would be okay if she weren't front-and-center on several plots. And hating her basically didn't come with an immediate Repulsor field of saying anything bad or evil or mean about her basically brings out every lesbian, girl who's not like other girls, animation aspirant, or Shoujo Manga fan who's had to deal with any harassment at any point in their lives and assumes that you're part of another chain of evil man figures. Cuz seriously Pearl is really really bothersome. And it gets more so when it feels like her bother some parts get put aside to make her more sympathetic or to make sympathetic allusions.

The big one for me was when they implied she was going to date a human woman. Despite the fact almost every other word out of her mouth about humans is utter contempt and disgust along with the aapprehensive fact she knows so little about their culture she can't pick up on 2000 year plus old practices. This would imply a level of bigotry that I honestly appreciate the entire fandom accepting in dis course

But much like a popular web novel series apparently her victimhood due to status and how she's crafted in terms of appealing identity matters more than the actual actions and character she displays. This is made even worse due to recent Revelations where I'm supposed to care even more

What's weird about it is that Pearl is in my opinion an incredibly well-written bigoted character. But she's not appreciated as such she's appreciated as basically a Justified bitch. And if any male character dares to show a similar level of fault unless yyou are stanning or shipping them they will be hated the fuck out oof or just dismissed. As far as I'm concerned Uncle Andy is Pearl with Aviation as opposed to space flight and spear use. He's effectively the straight older guy version of pearl. But no one will see that because all they can see is

oh she's autistic just like me

she's post-traumatic stress disorder just like me

oh she's a lesbian or atypical about feminism in some sort of way just like me.

And this got very explicit with one Tumblr poster who out and out said this then privately contacted me when I reblogged that moment to have me delete it and then close down her entire blog. This gets particularly bad due to the greater critical Steven Universe sentiment. Which honestly I want to enjoy but I can't help but feel that they're more pissed off that the lesbian Revolution was not what was being televised and not frustration with various storytelling beats because almost all the common storytelling criticism get apologized for by every fan and blamed on Cartoon Network

This is not helps with the plausible deniability especially combined with stuff that's happened above.

There is a fractal wrongness with the "what is a school" line coming from Pearl. To be fair it actually comes from Steven but she's basically repeats it a scene later and reveals her ignorance. Ignoring the fact that it's unrealistic for her to be ignorant or to not have looked it up in a fucking dictionary. There's the fact that that's "what is this thing you humans called love and or kissing?" level writing.

. Pearl is very deliberately kind of the anti girl written for guys sort of character. She's very much a girl written for girls sort of character. And I don't mean aimed at a female audience. I mean she's like the anti Starfire. this extends to hur character design which is all sharp edges along with the very deliberate I'm a lesbian fuck off codifiers that I keep mentioning. And the way they often and continuously show her as complicated is to do stupid shit like this. Make her have a breakdown and or make her ignorant about a human subject but only in a convenient way for a narrative. And when the consequences come they will be softened considerably because we need to be recognizing that she is a mentally ill lesbian who was oppressed and abused.

#rant #anti-character #pearl

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worryinglyinnocent · 7 years

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Fic: The Darkness Within (3/?)

Summary: When washed-up paranormal investigator Rum Gold meets Belle French, he does not quite know what to make of her claim of a supernatural presence in her life, but sensing her genuine fear, he begins to investigate. What he uncovers shakes the cynicism he has so long held to its very core, and he calls in the help of disgraced ex-priest Father Macavoy to help him lay some demons to rest…

A slow burn, eventual rumbellavoy. The rating may increase in later chapters.

Rated: T

[One] [Two] [AO3]

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Previously...

“Bad night?” Gold asked. She nodded. “Maybe you’d like to tell me about it?”

She shook her head. “No. I know your reputation. You wouldn’t believe me. Besides, I can’t remember. I can never remember. That’s the whole problem.”

Gold had no idea what he was letting himself in for, but he took the plunge nonetheless.

“Try me.”

=====

Three

Belle shook her head.

"You'll think I'm crazy, just like everyone else."

Gold shook his head.

"No. I might not believe in whatever it is that you're going to tell me, but I believe that you believe, and that's half the battle. I can see that whatever it is that's troubling you is having an adverse impact on your life." Gold paused, trailing one fingertip around the rim of his tumbler. "You have a genuine fear that you're trying to find a real world explanation for, and I'm offering to provide that real world explanation. That was the entire reason you took an interest in my book, wasn't it? And you found it unhelpful."

Belle nodded. "Yes, you're right." She gave a long sigh, taking a sip of her drink and staring into the depths of the glass, not meeting his eyes. "To be honest, I don't really know exactly what the matter is. I just know that there's something. And whatever it is, I'm afraid of it. And I don't want to be afraid anymore."

A soft snort of self-deprecating laughter escaped her lips. "Truth be told, this has been going on so long that I don't even know where to start, or what to say. A medical professional would look at me and immediately say that I had some kind of sleep disorder and some kind of memory disorder, but it's not as simple as that."

"Why don't you start at the beginning?" Gold suggested. Since she had already put the idea of a medical explanation for her problems forward, it was the one that he was inclined to take. The body and mind were both mysterious things that no-one could fully hope to understand. There were so many illnesses that scientists could not fathom either a cause or cure for, but there were usually steps that could be taken to mitigate their effects. Perhaps Belle had already tried these and they had failed. Perhaps she felt that her problem was not medical and that such intervention would not help her.

"I know what you're thinking," Belle said dryly. "And believe me, I've seen enough doctors in my time to know that whatever this is, it can't be treated by a handful of pills or some kind of surgery. If it could I'd be booking myself into that hospital tomorrow. As it is, I'm here." She looked around the bar. "I don't even really know where here is."

"Storybrooke, Maine," Gold pointed out, and Belle gave him a withering look.

"I know that much. I suppose I don't really know why I'm here. I guess I was just drawn here. Oh, it's more complicated than that. This thing, this... presence. It's taking over my life."

They fell into silence; Belle drained her glass and ordered another, as if the liquor fortified her and gave her the strength she needed to continue with her tale.

"Why don't you begin at the beginning?" Gold prompted.

Belle laughed, shaking her head softly. "If we really want to go right back to the beginning then we'll be delving into your most hated territory, Mr Gold." There was a slight smile on her face as she continued in spite of her melancholy, and it was good to see. For a brief moment, something in her face lightened and it brightened the room. "Psychics."

Gold suppressed a groan. Of all the things that he had investigated over his careers, the number of phoney psychics he had encountered and put out of business was a sore point. At one stage, it felt like all he was doing was smacking his head against a brick wall, investigating claims of miracles and seances that turned out to be a load of crap.

"It's all right," Belle said. "I've never been to one myself, and I've always taken all the reports of these people with a pinch of salt, but you wanted to start at the beginning and that's where I'm starting. It was my mother." She sighed. "Back home in Australia, my mother went to see a psychic whilst she was pregnant with me. It was only meant to be a bit of fun, nothing serious, and she didn't believe any of what he told her. She couldn't remember most of it. Probably about meeting some tall, dark stranger, you know the usual spiel. There was just one thing that unnerved her at the time, and that she didn't really think much about. He said that there was a dark cloud surrounding her child, something that he couldn't see clearly through. I mean, if you're a pregnant lady then you're going to be slightly wary of anything that could harm your baby and although a dark cloud is pretty vague, it still sounds kind of ominous. Still, she thought that perhaps he was just trying to get more money out of her. He was scaremongering to get another reading out of her, where he would say that everything was going to be all right and she didn't need to worry. But the psychic said that he wouldn't read her again. He practically shooed her out of the house, as if he was scared of this strange black cloud."

"But your mother didn't believe what he said?"

"Like I said, she was unnerved by it a little, but in reality, what's a dark cloud? It could be anything. It became a family joke then, every time something out of the ordinary happened, we blamed it on my dark cloud. Now though..."

"You think that there might have been something in the psychic's words and that there is some kind of a dark cloud?"

Belle nodded.

"Depression and other mental illnesses are sometimes described as being like a dark cloud," Gold said.

"I know, and I'd love for the explanation to be that simple. I don't really have any other symptoms, and none of the treatments I've tried have really worked."

Gold took a sip of his whiskey, considering her story carefully. She hadn't told him all that much, and nothing that could be explained away. Nothing that really warranted an explanation. Her mother had visited a psychic, which seemed to have no bearing whatsoever on her current position.

"Where's your mother now?" he asked.

"She died when I was seven," Belle said. "Car accident. She'd been to visit her family in a different town so at least I know that wasn't anything to do with me."

The words made Gold start. "You think you might have had something to do with deaths?"

Belle looked at him sagely, her eyes older than her years. "I've already told you that I have a lot of trouble with my memory," she said. "Who knows what I might have done in the bits I can't remember? My father died three months ago, but I wasn't there when it happened. I was in the house, I was in the next room, but I wasn't... present, if you get my meaning. I woke up and he was dead and I had no memory of anything that had happened. The coroner said it was a heart attack, natural causes, I'd been asleep at the time and didn't realise anything was amiss. No foul play suspected at all, no suspicion against me."

"But you suspect yourself."

Belle nodded. "I don't trust myself. My father might have died from a heart attack, but what if it was something I did that caused it?" She sighed, and they fell into silence again for a long time. "I guess that's why I moved. Up until then I had just about been able to live with it. It was getting worse, the whatever it is, but I could just about manage with Dad's help. Then suddenly I didn't have Dad and I had the terrible fear that it might have been my fault, and I can't live with it any more. I need answers, an explanation, a cure, anything. I just want it all to stop."

Gold took a moment to consider the facts of the case she had presented to him. He was missing one very crucial piece of information.

"What is it that you're trying to live with?" he asked. "This 'whatever it is' as you call it. The dark cloud."

Belle sighed. "I don't know what it is, but I think there's something sharing my brain."

Gold quirked an eyebrow; Belle noticed the motion and gave a little huff. "I knew you wouldn't believe me."

"I'm still listening."

"I call it the Dark One," Belle said, but she was looking at him warily and Gold could see her barriers going up again. "I don't know what it is. I can just feel it in there, sometimes. A little part of my mind that's closed off and doesn't belong to me. And then I have these blackouts, and I can't remember anything that happens during them, and I know that's when it comes out."

A thousand perfectly logical medical explanations flew through Gold's head. Hundreds of historical cases of fits and seizures and blackouts and epilepsy being attributed to possession and witchcraft.

But Belle had already said that there was no medical explanation; that she had already tried to get one.

"And I have proof, sort of," Belle said. "Well, nothing that you would call tangible proof. But my dad saw it. He saw me during my blackouts and he said he'd never seen anything like it."

"Did he give any more details?"

Belle shook her head. "No, I could never get it out of him. He was always really rattled though, I can tell you that much. Whatever it was, he never got used to it.”

Her movement was sudden then, she drained the remainder of her whiskey and slipped off the barstool. "This was a bad idea. I shouldn't have said anything. It's stupid. Just forget it. It's nothing. I have blackouts, a lot of people do."

"Wait, Belle!"

But she was already going, hurrying out of the bar, not looking back. Gold wondered what could have spooked her. Maybe she had felt an episode coming on and wanted to get somewhere safe before she succumbed to it.

Maybe, the less practically-minded and more psychically inclined part of him said, the Dark One was rearing its head and protesting at Belle sharing its secret. Gold rolled his eyes. Belle was not possessed. Possession was impossible. Malevolent evil spirits did not exist.

Since his entire object in coming to the bar had been to talk to Belle, there wasn't really a lot of point in him remaining. All the same, there was something that he could do, just to satisfy his own curiosity. Whilst the barkeep's back was turned, Gold carefully picked up the glass that Belle had been using with his handkerchief, tucking it into his jacket pocket and placing some bills down on the counter to cover his drink. The walk back to his house felt different tonight. There was something in the atmosphere that was fraught, charged with a particular kind of tension and excitement that Gold had not felt in a very long time. This was the thrill of the chase, the idea that he might find something inexplicable and prove the existence of the paranormal. Of course, in the past, that feeling had so often been followed by disappointment, but in this case, Gold would not mind the disappointment because it would still be a victory for his own common sense and peace of mind.

Even as he sat down behind his desk and took out the sheet that he had transferred the handprint from the window onto, he was telling himself that he was being utterly ridiculous and since he was at the stage of stealing whiskey tumblers from bars in order to try and prove or disprove a theory, then taking a step back from the city and coming to Storybrooke evidently had not been enough for his nerves. He was going to have to get a lot further away from it all below it took over his life completely.

He still couldn't bring himself to stop doing what he was doing, though, and he carefully lifted Belle's fingerprints from the whiskey glass, setting to work with his magnifiers. Gold had never had access to any of the high-tech machinery that could match fingerprints to databases within seconds, but he didn't need them. He just needed to compare the two.

He spent three hours poring over the prints, checking every single detail, every single comparison marker, and then he checked them all again. There was no getting around it, and suddenly his conversation with Belle at the bar took on a far more chilling turn. There was no doubt about it. It was Belle's handprint that had been on his window that morning. Belle had been in his garden, pressing her hand up against the glass.

Why?

#rumbelle fic #rumbelle #Belle French #Mr Gold #Fic: The Darkness Within

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