#erstwhilesparrow

[boatemlag]

for drawing request: an owenge? perhaps a little rat owenge if it is useful for me to specify server, but really any owenge that strikes your fancy will do

the owenrat took like 2 seconds so i added in a bonus outsiders owenge... i do think his hair is greasy and long and BAD because he refuses to let anyone come near his head with a sharp object. heart. the owenrat is wearing his goggles and its making his eyes do a bobble tinkerbell thing

#im hoping he looks sad and pathetic. He should #owengejuicetv #asks #erstwhilesparrow

[umbrify]

i have indeed found that you do timestamps for all your meta and i am utterly delighted by this. since i do very much want to know more of your jimmy thoughts, can i ask about what you think of him in season 1 specifically? (you're free to pick whatever subtopic to discuss here that you like, but i'm especially curious what you find most compelling about his relationship with fwhip and how that compares to what they're like in season 2?)

Oh gosh— uh, y’know, you’ve picked an area of Jimmy here that I’m much less knowledgeable in. I’m still in the process of watching season one back— I only got into empires at the start of season two— and I don’t know enough to really have super informed analysis on e1 Jimmy.

I’ll give you some thoughts anyway, based on what I know, but I can’t really do my usual timestamps for this one. Take this more as my general musing about these characters, based on what I know, instead of making some sort of proper point here. Does that make sense?

I will say, I find it fascinating how his character seemed to have turned out so differently in season one. The Codfather seems a lot more… confident? Supported? He’s got people in his corner, and he basically always did. He seems to have that same sort of demand for respect— how he demands people be sacrificed before they can join his alliance— yet… people do it? People will make that sacrifice for him, and they’ll give him that undying loyalty, and I just have to wonder like… what’s different here? It’s the same core character trait, and yet the end result is wildly different. He’s very much a character shaped by his environment.

A friend and I, in our process to understand more about some empires characters, have been looking for their… narrative through line, so to speak. The core trait that these characters carry across seasons. We have them for fWhip and Scott, but we’ve been struggling with Jimmy. What is his core trait, if he even has one? He seems to have one, but I’m just not quite sure what it is. It seems like the difference between e1 and e2 Jimmy, is that e1 Jimmy had the support that e2 Jimmy craved. Yet, I feel like e2 Jimmy did a lot more… shoving people away. But, I can’t say for sure. The differences are interesting to me, need to study e1 Jimmy more.

As for him and fWhip, god they are so much. Jimmy starts it both times, though in season one, he started it with Sausage first, which, I can’t find the exact moment in episode this happened— I didn’t take notes on season one— but I have found an instance of Sausage mentioning that Jimmy stole from him first: Sausage season one episode 14, 8:24. Jimmy insists that Sausage said it was okay, but he says that Jimmy took more than they agreed. This initial conflict with Mythland is what eventually led to the trench being created between Mythland and the Codlands, which is what set the WRA against the Cod Alliance.

But, the point is, that Jimmy and fWhip were never able to be friends. They were neutral at best before the Cod Wars, and then they were enemies up until almost the very end. And when they finally, finally started being friendly again, well.

“The resolution of a neverending feud will cause unimaginable chaos that will destroy the world.”

A destiny told in the stars themselves. These two could never be meaningful friends. fWhip and Jimmy, trying to right past wrongs and reforge the Codfather head, it destroyed the world.

It wasn’t their fault. It was never their fault. How could they have known? There’s no way they could’ve known. Yet, the universe was destined to rip them apart before they could ever be something. Before they could ever be any more than enemies.

Isn’t that just so much? Destined to always be on the fringes of each other’s spheres, destined to be forever enemies, forever apart. Even in season two, their friendship was short lived, torn apart.

And the universe said you are alone. And the universe said you are separate from every other thing.

I think about them a lot.

#i know this isn’t quite on the same analysis level as the other post #I’ve been doing a watch through of season one WRA #but I haven’t gotten to Jimmy’s side yet so unfortunately my knowledge is minimal #i hope you can find some interest here anyway #empires smp #umbrify answers #erstwhilesparrow

[finalmoment]

for the ao3 wrapped game: any combination of [3, 15, 29]?

sorry for the late response, and thanks for asking!

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

aaah, it's always difficult to think of my writing with pride once i have distance from it. if we define work loosely, i think Vani and Vivi (original characters made with my friend lavender) would be the ones I'm most proud of. they're such good, interesting, beautiful characters, and their relationship makes me feel so many things.

but if i limit it to what I've written... maybe northbound & reaching, my fairytale fantasy Diluc/Kaeya fic. i can't think of it without certain regrets but i still feel like i did it as well as i could.

What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

hopefully, none. i want to finish what i need to do this year, and start over fresh next year with new goals and new projects. keeping a project alive for too long kills my spirit—I'm a fast writer by nature.

Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

impossible to answer :( sorry

ask me for my ao3 wrapped

#erstwhilesparrow #asks

[atthebell-moved]

🌹?

They’re sitting on the roof of the van, staring up at the sky on a cloudless day. Well, that’s where Wilbur imagines they are. He’s tired of staring at subway walls, and Tommy can’t see anything anyway. Might as well pretend they’re on the camarvan, safe behind L’Manberg’s walls. It’s as much fantasy as anything else they pretend this is.  He’s not sure exactly what sparks it, whether it’s something Tommy said or it just came upon him, but now he’s ready to talk about it. Ready to explain, maybe. He starts talking, slow but sudden.  “You know when you’re staring at a wall, or a piece of granite, or even the clouds, for a long time, and you start seeing patterns in them? Little faces, rabbits, ships, that kind of stuff.” Tommy, by his side, nods. This is just like any ridiculous conversation they’ve had, one where Wilbur begins with some not-so-deep metaphor that Tommy tears to shreds in an instant. They’ve had a million of them, now. Tommy doesn't look at him, though, busy staring off into the dark, or at a bird flying overhead. Wilbur imagines it's an osprey.

sorry this is far longer than a sentence! anyway this is from the same wip as this snippet

ask game

#asks #erstwhilesparrow #ask games #bell.doc

[irrealisms]

tagged by @arisingonmorningsinnocent

Rules: shuffle your On Repeat playlist and post the first 10 tracks, then tag 10 people

It's All Futile! It's All Pointless! by Lovejoy

In the Shadow of the Western Hills by the Mountain Goats

Nobody by the Crane Wives

Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths

Never Quite Free by the Mountain Goats

A Burning Hill by Mitski

Hast Thou Considered the Tetrapod by the Mountain Goats

Be Calm by Fun.

Autoclave by the Mountain Goats

His Theme by Toby Fox

tagging @spiritunwilling @circuit77 @risingape @existentialterror @scientificalstories @erstwhilesparrow @adhdo5 @roundearthsociety @lepertamar @wolffyluna and anyone who sees this and wants to-- feel free to say i tagged you ^_^ and on the flip side if you were tagged and don't want to do it feel free to not!

#this is to say: i have pretty basic taste EXCEPT when it comes to the mountain goats. i have good tmg-related taste #which is related to tmg songs being 40% of the list #also i want to listen to in the shadow of the western hills a couple times now #feral cats out by the trash cans / to the true believer everything's a sign! scrape the pigments from the baseboards #therapists dni #trying to decide on people to tag was so hard bro ;-; what a joyous difficulty though! #o to have Too Many people on tumblr you're friends with and curious about the music tastes of! #i considered tagging mutuals i haven't talked as much to as well but i am too shy... alas #know that if you are my mutual i am tagging you in my heart & curious about your music taste though

[salemoleander]

Brainfog // A webweave based on waiting for the fog to lift by Odaigahara

MCYT Recursive Exchange 2024 // sources under readmore

What is a webweave?

Previous art: Third Life | Void Falling | Attempt 33 | Martyn | Limited Life | Nightingale Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | singing songs to the secrets behind my eye | A Hundred Things We Had Not Dreamed Of | Solving Counting Sheep

Setpiece Clouds / @snailspng ◆ You're Home Free... Plaque / Jenny Holzer via @killyridols ◆ The Invader / Eva Funderburgh ◆ i walk in long loping circles poem / @erstwhilesparrow ◆ Connubial / Stephen Dunn ◆ Eight of Swords / Sarah Kipin via @thecollectibles ◆ Cat Island / Matt Schu via @nevver ◆ Detail from The Annunciation / Fra Angelico via @santoschristos ◆ I don't know why I'm wearing this button / Busy Beaver Button Museum via @skunkstripe ◆ Compass Ring / @snailspng ◆ Never Found Sign / @albatross-the-pen-chewer ◆ Occupation Helper Murderer / @screenshotsofdespair ◆ "Like it's my fault..." textpost / @mumblesplash ◆ Ethereal / Whitney Barkman ◆ Mountain Landscape / Caspar David Friedrich via @artschoolglasses

#webweave #mcyt recursive exchange #mcytrecursiveexchange #web weave #etho #salem tag #this is also crossposted on ao3! :D and I have a new fic as well but i didnt have a post prepped for that and it is 1 am here

[martynsimp69]

HEY IT'S THE END OF THE MCYTBLR HOLIDAY EXCHANGE AND IM FINALLY HERE TO DELIVERY YOUR GIFT

@erstwhilesparrow HI!!! your prompts made me go wild and it was SO hard to choose between them, but i hope you like the outcome!!!

here's a link for higher res version in case tumblr eats the image quality on this

there was a specific prompt in your letter about a selkie au with these two that really captured my imagination--my first thought was something about martyn's history of killing as a form of devotion, and the imbalance inherent to a relationship with a selkie and the weird bond these two formed; trust that felt genuine until the moment it wasn't.

the image in my head was something with martyn washing scott's blood out of his own coat for him, sometime after the yellow hunt for his time. (or even later down the line--if martyn was left to live out his time at the end, perhaps he'd find himself at the edge of the water, scrubbing his hands and that silvery-blue pelt clean of his own betrayal. old habits die hard.)

ANYWAYS THOUGH. i hope you like it, i know i had fun figuring out how to draw a landscape like this. happy holidays, and good luck in the new year!

#mcytblrholidayexchange2023 #mean gills #limited life #smajor #scott smajor #inthelittlewood #martyn inthelittlewood #i was also looking that double life mech idea but i was not confident in my ability to pull that one off. just know i loved it a lot #i cannot WAIT to go read ur gift for me now. i wanted to make sure urs was here before i could go eat mine SORRY;; #beans art tag

[erstwhilesparrow]

current erstwhilesparrow blog experience:

[first part of a very nice comic about jon arbuckle from garfield]

["i don't think ethoslab kisses."]

[second part of a very nice comic about jon arbuckle from garfield]

[pretty kitty pixel art]

["inventing guys to get mad at is exactly like doing pottery"]

#sparrowsong #obviously the followup question is 'does etho fuck' and part of me wants to say yes for the bit #but he is so very an intricate rituals sort of guy. #[thinks about the statues from his hc ep this week].

[teethcollection]

Time is thick, honey-sweet, languid and slow. It’s not a troublesome truth, most of the time. Most of the time, the house’s dining room goes unused. 

a line from of all the wounds of living by @erstwhilesparrow, a fic that has been rattling in my brain nonstop for 72 hours

click for quality!

#witchcraft smp #wcsmp #smajor #soupforeloise #zombiecleo #for bl -> #blood #quick thing i needed to get out of my system you know how it is

[sword-dad-fukuzawa]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's spread the self-love 💞

tagged by: @erstwhilesparrow, thanks!!

all of the following fics are rated E for explicit nasty trigun sex, among other things.

one last run

my magnum opus; my postcanon vk thesis. this is the kind of fic you read when you're having a shit day and you want to feel even shittier before the final act catharsis makes all of it worth it. it's a story about the dirty shame of loving someone who doesn't deserve it; it's about grief; it's about wanting to end it all and the two different roads you could take from that. but more than all the ugly fighting and crying it's about the life that blooms out from between those things.

one of its first readers told me that despite being a major character death fic, it made them feel better by the end, and despite the premise being a final devastating road trip, it's really about the love and laughter that happens in spite of all that. dunno if i'll ever reach this kind of writing again. regardless, give it a read if any of this appeals to you.

leave the shells for the crows

wrote this over the course of several months. this is what you get after you watch trigun stampede's finale, devilman crybaby, and madk back to back: noncon subverted and erotic gore turned to the max. do you like wound fucking? suicidal impulses but sexy? knife play? it's here, it's queer, it's incestuous and by god, it commits to the bit. read this for the weirdest wank session of your life. knives gets to top, but at what cost?

apostate baptisms

wrote this one for a friend. a single snapshot of obscene tenderness (hair washing; bathing) subverted by obscene violence (your little brother shot bullet holes through your thighs and now you're goading him into throttling you in the bathroom). probably my best characterization of vash the stampede out of everything i've ever written. it's sexy, it's heartwrenching, and there's love in spite of it all. maybe there's a way forward. maybe, maybe, maybe. momcon if you squint but there's plenty of twincest to go around.

sparrowsong

a bit of a departure from the other four fics here: a mostly canon-compliant companion piece to trigun stampede with a romeryl focus. one reviewer summarized it as "old man fights his lust and loses." it's 12k of fierce eyed, pretty girl, no-nonsense idealist meryl stryfe trying to get into her senpai's pants. your typical age gap romance with the soft missionary sex to back it up. the ending takes the coward's way out without an ounce of shame, but i like to think it still hits like a truck.

abel with the rock upraised

plantwood feelings, written for an exchange. you ever had a thing for your boss and his brother, who happens to be your target? no? good, because it's not like wolfwood is dealing with it well. neither is vash, who has loved knives for longer than anyone on this planet has been alive this is mostly a vashwood fic with a lot of yearning for millions knives (evil, irredeemable) haunting the story. i might as well spoil it--this is a story where vash kills his twin and wolfwood gets to watch. no one is happy, everyone is miserable, and the only reprieve is death. but hey! at least wolfwood gives great head!

tagging: anyone who sees this and wants to do it! self promo your shit, guys! i support you!!

#trigun #trigun stampede #plantcest #romeryl #vashwood #plantwood

[coldwind-shiningstars]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's spread the self-love 💞

Tagged by @erstwhilesparrow, thank you!!!

1. Cam-Account Parenting, for the Life Series. Not only is this the one I'm most proud of, it's also very inspired by Sparrow's fics. It's about sexism and the horrible way we treat ~marginalized gender creators, and someone told me it's the most horrifying thing they've ever read :3. But also it's silly and fun

2. How to Decay Gracefully, Mo Dao Zu Shi. Qin Su lives AU, Qin Su and Lan Xichen deal with Jin Guangyao's death. This one was really hard to write just because of the sensitivity of its content, but I feel like it's one of the fics that best demonstrates My Style, which is complicated, atypical relationships and negotiating how people fit together best.

3. Such a thing as "Day": BNHA, Toshinori and Aizawa qpp. This is six years old, but I'm including it because I think it's my oldest "good" fic and also where I really hit my stride as a writer.

4. If You Learn To Starve For Him: character study, Tian Guan Ci Fu, He Xuan & Ming Yi character study. Another "typically me" one about complex relationships.

5. The Eternal Stanger, with @stripedroseandsketchpads. Utena AU for tgcf, hualian focused. It's not anywhere near done but we put a lot of thought and research into this and I'm having a great time with it even if it's been a while since we started!

tagging @stripedroseandsketchpads @fatalism-and-villainy @rowenabean @kidrat and anyone else who wants to!

#tag games

[boatemlag]

Hi I read your gift fic to Bee and I am soooooooooo wondering about the funerary rites of every empire pls tell me about them

[ID: Ask from erstwhilesparrow that says, "[staggers out of ao3 shaking slightly] okay so obviously now i have to ask you for your thoughts on empires funerary practices!! stares at you with big pleading eyes. share thoughts?" /end ID]

HI!!!! im so glad you asked >:) a lot of this is in my brain but this was the initial note for the concept for the gift fic so you see where i'm coming from

[Text ID: A screenshot of an iPhone notes app bullet point that says: "2. 2. mezalea and complicated system of rebirth and reincarnation-> no sense of grieving funerals? joel has never had to grieve because hes inorganic. clay structures dont die. interested in the connection between golems in judaism and clay constructs in mezalea" /end ID]

my basic concept with mezalea was ultimately that because constructs dont die (joel was made by the mother tree, and in turn made the mezaleans in his image? something like that) they cant properly die? and if they do die their friends and family or joel himself can reinstate them, and theres ritual for that, but its a thing that is ultimately for inorganics. and its not really akin to a funeral.

more under the cut, separated by nation! ones mentioned in the fic first!

mythland: for mythland i was inspired by this story i heard from a classmate of a funeral he attended in his father's hometown in china where they walked from the morgue to the cemetery and it took like multiple hours and they were singing funeral songs and prayers and such and then still had a ceremony at the cemetery. i had an image in my mind of the rain falling through the dark oak leaves and sausage dressed in the robes of a king even though he is so small (way too small for him) and the robes really are wearing him, and the hours upon hours of walking through the streets of mythland to the royal cemetery with hundreds of mythic citizens behind them singing mourning songs and the toll that takes on a boy too young to be king... yes. delicious. after the blood sheep religion is revived, these ceremonies involved ritual animal sacrifice.

gilded helianthia: i really like the idea of helianthians being people of the earth, and not having huge ceremonies for their funerals. people coming from the earth and going back to the earth. planting their favorite plants in their resting place. this one is pretty self explanatory i think? and its a very logical extension of helianthia's values. the bonfire is something i think is very common in surrounding areas of bordering nations.

pixandria: pixandria is, i think, the only canon depiction we have of funerals? its kind of obvious to say "The Vigil" but like. the Vigil. im also a big fan of the idea of something similar to an ofrenda being common, visiting the memorials of lost loved ones. i also think corpses dont preserve well in the desert so cremation is very common. the body is not considered very sacred and its the soul that has to be memorialized.

rivendell: i spend so much time thinking about these goddamn elves its not even FUNNYY!!!!!! religious schisms make me SICK!!!!!! in the head. anyway. i think cremation used to be very very common in rivendell because in the cold of the mountains bodies decompose very very slowly. but after the schism fire is considered weirdly sacrilegious when it comes to rituals, so they sort of have shirked the cremation part of the ritual. theyve always had wakes i think, and theyve replaced cremation with a complex catacomb type situation. elves also dont die super often? so there are centuries of elves buried beneath the mountains but its not like. that many. comparatively. elves consider it important to see the corpses of their loved ones as part of the grieving process and its an egregious crime to desecrate a corpse or modify the body in any way, even back in the days of cremation.

cod empire/codlands: funerals are VERY important in codish culture because the swamp conditions mean uhhh bog bodies are very possible. and thats considered sacrilegious because the only preserved body allowed is the cod head lmao. its a religious symbol as well as a theocratic symbol. that being said, there are a plethora of ways cod folk prefer to care for their dead. for those who are closer in heritage to oceanic peoples, its very common to feed corpses to fish (livestock) and hold a ceremony during then. for those with mythic heritage (before the ravine and erection of the walls of codlands and mythland) funeral processions were very common, though usually taken out to sea. these are just a few of the types of funerary ceremonies the codfolk use.

ocean empire: as mentioned in the previous section, oceanic rituals often involve feeding bodies to the fishy livestock as a funeral ritual. other than that, more land-living oceanic citizens do something akin to a "viking funeral" where flaming rafts are sent out to sea

lost empire: heh. so theres two main things here: pre and post xornoth. the folks of the lost empire used to bury their dead in large clearings dedicated as cemeteries. for more important people in society they constructed tombs all connected by underground tunnels. post-xornoth, cremation was added as a common custom. this was obviously short lived for the empire.

house blossom/the overgrown: similar to gilded helianthia, except instead of the land around, citizens are buried with seeds on their being, to be used as nutrients for the large wild flowers. post burial rituals include several days of merriment and mourning, and i like the idea that bonfires are also common here.

the grimlands: i really like the idea of public burial in the fields outside of the main capital of the grimlands. there are pretty large cemeteries that are multilayered. the tradition has a common ancestor with the lost empire's tradition.

crystal cliffs: I REALLY LIKE THE IDEA OF LIKE. magic being involved in some way. perhaps the crystallization of famous witches and wizards and sorcerers immortalized in amethyst, deep beneath the mountains. because the crystal cliffs is run by the headmaster or headmistress at the time i think the general burial rights actually depend on the nation of origin or wishes of the individual. crystal cliffs is very much a nation of various peoples because anyone can attend.

the undergrove: the burial rights of the gnomes is a dying secret. because there are very few gnomes left, the decimation of the population has erased former traditions in the face of cremation to eliminate chance of Corruption. it used to be something else, but that knowledge is lost to time.

#empires smp #empires s1 #i feel like i should put this in my map tag. its worldbuilding. so i will #cartography table #asks #wooshofficial #erstwhilesparrow

[aconfusedkitten]

shine like my petals once shone -- meta 

@erstwhilesparrow you asked for rambling so. um. yeah.

so petals! i stole the name from amazing devil’s song blossoms, and i think this is the second fic i’ve named from it? i’m not sure why, but it has these vibes that just relate to people who once had something together, and try to reconcille with something that went wrong, which fits!

anyways, the fic is divided into four parts, each focusing on a different time period because that’s the only way i can think of to break this up, with the first two having more unevenly split pov’s than the last two. so i’m expecting it to be Long, because i’m barely a scene into it and it’s already nearing 1,000 words and the first chapter (diluc’s) has to cover eighteen years of getting to know each other.

of course. it’s canon compliant, so it ends with their fallout, but! last two chapters fix that up, so :3

it’s kaeya, so i have to have a bit of a star motif happening, and there might be some sun/moon things because i love the imagery. fire tends to work its way into a lot of my romance focused things, and with diluc being a pryo user? it’s bound to happen here, so i have a lot of things i want to incorporate into the scenes, even if i pretty much only have the first chapter’s ending planned.

look, there’s something special about meeting your soulmate and growing up with them, and petals may or may not take that and then ruin it, breaking any trust between them, because kaeya may be spying and then diluc is gone, and there can’t be any trust after that.

me tying starting over with flowers blooming?? and tossing that at soulmates?? probably a thing. 

i just think it’s fun to tie in flowers appearing and fading like tattoos is neat, and then combined that with the most dramatic couple in genshin, and yeah!! i’m not ready for how long this fic is gonna be :3

#cheshire rambles #genshin impact #kaeluc #sparrow! #i did say i only had like. structural ideas #and no actual scenes planned #shine like my petals once shone

[finalmoment]

tagged by @erstwhilesparrow to shuffle my repeat playlist and post the first 10 songs. to indulge myself i'm gonna also post my favorite lyrics from each song

seven hours - little may. I know that you’ve seen all the ways that my body can talk / But I never heard it like, I never heard it like that

hide and seek - amber run. Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth / Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs.

blood bank - bon iver. spotify keeps throwing this song at me and i like it but not enough to pick a lyric

devil like me - rainbow kitten surprise. holes riddled in your head / little bit of lead / shake it out and line a silhouette

about you - the 1975. and there was something about you that now i can't remember / it's the same damn thing that made my heart surrender.

illicit affairs - taylor swift. this is here bc of morgan and camille i once looped it for 3 hours while thinking about them. a dwindling, mercurial high / a drug that only worked / the first few hundred times.

bottom of the deep blue sea - missio. this is here because of beefleaf. the sweet surrender of silence forces me to live alone / locked and loaded, where the hell is peace of mind?

paul - big thief. this is just a good song. it's so good. i'll be your morning bright good night shadow machine / i'll be your record player, baby, if you know what i mean

7x7 - fairhazel. spotify why do u do this. walking down the streets that i've come to ignore / time wears beauty down to a dull-edged blade.

georgia - phoebe bridgers. he came up through the water without a sound / with my back to the shoreline i dreamt that he drowned.

my taste in music is functionally identical to a white girl's. i must apologize for the presence of taylor swift on here my roommate is a swiftie and therefore i have been stockholmed into listening to so many of her songs that my brain has formed unbreakable character associations

tagging @emara :3c

#notes #tag meme

[irrealisms]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's spread the self-love 💞

tagged by: @erstwhilesparrow

the autopsy garland -- dsmp hunger games au about rpf fandom and the horrors of celebrity. parts of it have aged poorly--it's about, in part, both the fandom and hatedom surrounding cc!dream and the dream smp as a whole, and also unrelatedly it's about sexual abuse, and, uh, it was published before the dream situation let alone any of the ones that came after it, i have no clue what it'd look like if i wrote it now but certainly it would look wildly different--but i'm still so fucking proud of it. the epistolary sections. the bits of canon dialogue. threading the line between "this guy did awful awful things" and "holy shit, the stuff happening to him is not okay to do to anyone"

between the moth and the moon -- lifesteal, a gentle moment between vitalasy & zam. i wrote this one bc i needed zam to tell vitalasy i mourned you. it's a missing scene and it's one i needed and it's gentle and soft and bittersweet and i go reread it whenever i'm sad about them (this is often)

i don't have the heart to match -- mdzs, my Trans Woman Jiang Cheng Manifesto. there is something so special in my heart for yunmeng shuangjie and jc's issues about wei wuxian and Duty and jealousy and. and. man

Your Body Is Not A Word -- tma fic about s4 jonathan sims exchanging sex for statements. it's about sexual trauma and it's about starving and it's about being both victim and monster and it's about not really being able to believe in the dialectic there and it's about making choices that hurt yourself because you don't having any good options left and not-doing-anything hurts too.

whatever a moon has always meant -- indis/míriel silmarillion fic which is nominally about LaCE and in practice about Catholic sexual ethics & the Catholic outlook more broadly. it's also about grief and doubt and a lot of other things but it's very very Catholic and struggling with that Catholicism. it gets kind of ... pretentious? overwrought in a very teenage fashion? at times, but the core of it is very important to me. considered doing one of my númenor or maedhros fics here instead, there's some good stuff there as well, but. idk. this one's got a soft spot in my heart and it's less Relentlessly Fucking Depressing lol

tagging: @consumptive-sphinx , @blocksgame , @honeyblockm , @peninkwrites , @crimeboys

#i gave myself a bit of an extra challenge of doing one favorite fic per fandom #which was fun but Not Required #writing tag #my writing #ish #therapists dni

[erstwhilesparrow]

oooh what does ''it was the first thing and it will be the last'' mean? 👀

reyni!! :]

it's from a welcome to night vale quote! uh. i am typing this on my phone so i will just have to give you the link to copy-paste: https://www.tumblr.com/erstwhilesparrow/697540388842553344/pitchscribbles-its-been-a-good-3-years-since

(it's really good art too :] )

anyway! i'm using it as my general short stories tag.

#chattering sparrow #:] #sleepy and not doing words great right now #but. :]