Tolerate It
Y/n loves Newt with all their heart, but does he love them back? Or is his heart claimed by someone who doesn’t deserve it?
newt scamander x reader, newt scamander x leta lestrange
gender neutral pronouns
TW: jealousy, reader might be the tiniest bit toxic, angst
okay so newt scamander is a precious bby boy but i wanted to make some angst and this idea came up soooooo here we are
harry potter masterlist
Y/n went around, caring for the various creatures that were under Newt’s — and therefore her — care. Gently they ran their fingers over the fuzzy heads of the baby Nifflers; they were a handful, but they were so sweet that they had captured Y/n’s heart. Their guardian had also captured their heart, but they were beginning to think that those feelings were not reciprocated.
The sound of footsteps broke Y/n’s trail of thoughts, and they straightened up and picked up the bucket of feed they had previously set aside. Newt came up beside Y/n, bending down and smiling at the baby nifflers.
“They are little rascals aren’t they.”
“I put a stronger lock on them; next time they shouldn’t be able to get out.”
“Ah, thank you.” Newt smiled up at Y/n, his eyes warm and happy.
Quickly they turned, trying to keep their heart from hurting anymore than it did. Moving back towards the door, Y/n tried to keep their composure while they were still in Newt’s presence.
“So, same time on Sunday, correct?“
“Well, yes, of course Y/n, but won’t you-“
“Good day Scamander.” Y/n was almost to the top step when they felt a hand on their arm. Turning around, they regretted it immediately. Looking up at them were the most beautiful green eyes, eyes they looked as if they had seen the universe, and right now they were looking at Y/n with concern.
“Y/n? Have I offended you in some way?”
Swallowing the growing lump in their throat, Y/n let out a sigh and looked down at their shoes. “No, no it’s me.”
“Whatever is the matter?”
For a moment Y/n considered telling Newt, after seeing the look in his eyes and the sincerity in his voice, but just as they opened their mouth to speak, the clock chimed loudly.
“Oh bugger, I’m supposed to meet with Leta right now, Y/n-“
“Go. Just go.” Y/n rolled their eyes, scoffing lightly at the thought that they ever could’ve taken priority over Leta Lestrange. Y/n watched as Newt rushed around, grabbing his coat, pocket watch, and other various necessities, muttering under his breath.
Once satisfied, Newt dashed up the stairs past Y/n, but stopped suddenly with his hand on the door. “Wait, there was something you were going to say?”
“Don’t bother, it doesn’t matter.”
“But of course it matters, you matter.”
“But do I actually matter Newt?! You were ready to rush out that door for Leta Lestrange, why are you bothering time with me?” Y/n took a deep breath, surprised at their own outburst.
“Well, I don’t want to be late for Leta, but I suppose if you need me to stay-“
“That’s just the thing Newt! I don’t want you to stay just because I ask you to, I want you to stay because you wanted to! Because you care about me!” Hot tears began to roll down Y/n’s face as they spoke, all the pent up anxiety and emotion coming out.
“You think that no one cares for you, but you are greatly mistaken. There is not a friend you have that wouldn’t put you first. Theseus loves you, Jacob and Queenie love you, Tina loves you, and Leta-“ A sob escaped Y/n. “Leta loves you. I…I love you. And there is nothing any of us wouldn’t do for you. You have never, ever, been second Newt. You capture people’s hearts and make them love you, you can’t help it. You are brilliant in every possible way.” Taking a shaky breath, Y/n roughly brushed away the tears.
“But me? I’ve never been that way. I have always been second place; I am not, and could never be Leta Lestrange. I can never be as talented, as posh, as absolutely wickedly beautiful as she is. But she does not, she can not love you as I do. I care for these animals by your side, I could listen to you talk about the complexities of Bowtruckle social status for hours, all because I love you as you are. I would give my whole heart to you if you just asked, for it has always been yours. But your heart, it’s never been mine, and that hurts.”
Newt stood speechless, looking down at the floor. Awkwardly he would opened his mouth occasionally just to close it again, and time seemed to drag by as neither person made a move.
Finally Newt’s pocket watch made a noise, alerting him that he was running late to his appointment. Looking back at Y/n, he put his hand on the doorknob and turned. “I’m sorry, I have to go.”
And just like that, he was gone; Y/n, energy spent, crumpled onto the step, finally allowing themselves to grieve for a man they never had.
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I watched the movie for the fifth time yesterday at my loval cinema. Some have watched it more times, but to must people this is a lot of times to watch the same movie.
This isn't something that I usually do, but I really adore SoD, so I take joy from it and every ticket is essential to give as a better chance at another movie.
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