#fuck the metatron

[mintybagels]

I’d give anything to hear

You say it one more time

That the universe was made

Just to be seen by my eyes

#i really wanted to make part 2 so here it is #it’s sad time once again so now i will start drawing happier things #once i’m recovered lol #good omens #good omens 2 #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #gos2 spoilers #gos2 #crowley #aziraphale #FUCK THE METATRON #ineffible husbands #aziracrow #neil gaiman

[writingdinosaur]

Aziraphale was wrong this. He’ll come crawling back that. I want him to do the apology dance blah blah blah.

You know what I want? I want him to succeed.

I want him to give Heaven hell.

I want him to be a problem of the Metatron’s own making.

I keep seeing a take floating around that the Metatron was obviously lying when calling Aziraphale a natural leader and a good choice for Supreme Archangel and just trying to butter Aziraphale up so he’ll be more open to the idea of rejoining Heaven, but I think there is an important distinction to be made in this regard.

Aziraphale IS those things. He IS a natural leader. He was the first being to ever wield a weapon on earth. He is a high ranking member of Heaven’s army and was in charge of a platoon in the first war EVER. HE WAS FULLY EXPECTED TO DO SO AGAIN IN ARMAGEDDON. We can see this leadership both in Season 1 when he insists to Crowley that they don’t run away and in Season 2 when facing the demons. And if Heaven actually was everything it was meant to be, everything it still proclaims that it is, Aziraphale WOULD be the obvious choice for Supreme Archangel, because when faced between making the right choice or making the obedient one, or even between making the right choice or the comfortable choice, he has always picked the right one.

Give up the sword and lie to God or let the humans suffer? Welp, there goes the sword.

Lie on my word as an Angel or allow three human children to be killed? Guess who’s lying again!

Go back to my abusers in order to make things better for everyone or run away with the love of my life who just confessed his feelings for me? Up I go.

Here’s the kicker. The Metatron ALSO thinks he was lying to Aziraphale. In the Metatron’s eyes, Aziraphale is none of those things. The Metatron and the Archangels are nothing but condescending pricks to the Angel they see as a bumbling, incompetent, slightly insane fool who chose Earth over Heaven.

I don’t want Aziraphale to come crawling back. I don’t want him to realize it’s a lost cause. I don’t want him to give up.

What I want is to see the Metatron’s face as he watches Aziraphale succeed.

#good omens #aziraphale #fuck the metatron #gomens meta #metatrash #good omens meta #metatron #ineffable husbands #good omens season 2 #good omens season three speculation #neil gaiman good omens #neil gaimen #neil gaiman #archangel aziraphale #good omens analysis #good omens 3 #good omens show #good omens season two

[actual-changeling]

Aziraphale sees Crowley standing next to his their car and he hesitates; this is his last chance, the last possible moment to change his mind about leaving.

Do you think he feels the sunshine on his hands, against his stomach, and remembers how warm Crowley had been in his arms? How warm he had felt beneath his palms even through several layers of fabric?

How for the first time in his existence his body had felt complete, like there was no longer something��� someone missing?

Do you think he sees him standing in the sun, all shining fire-red and hidden golden eyes, and regrets not sliding his hand to the back of his neck, up into his hair? Do you think he regrets not taking the chance to feel it silken soft and familiar between his fingers?

Do you think he remembers all the times they enjoyed a warm, sunny day together and the way the star seems to remember that Crowley had put its siblings into the sky? Do you think he remembers rays of sunlight caressing his cheekbones and wishes it had been his fingertips instead?

'Anything you need?' the Metatron asks him, and he is still looking at Crowley with the sun on his skin.

I need you, he thinks, and even though his eyes are hidden away, he knows Crowley is looking at him.

Do you think Aziraphale remembers the kiss, remembers the love he could taste on his tongue, the six millennia of do that, please, kiss me, the slow, painful minute of do that again, please, right now?

(The realization that he won't.)

He almost stays. Almost. But the Metatron is already walking away, and he looks at Crowley again, looks past sunset conversations and sunrise breakfasts and the heart-shaped star in Crowley's chest, and feels his pain.

(Their pain.)

Do you think that's why he leaves anyway? Not just because heaven needs fixing but because all that pain, all the hurt they caused each other, can't have been for nothing?

I can't leave him— no, I don't want to leave him.

No.

No, I want to go back to him.

Do you think he takes his anger and holds onto it until it burns his palm because it is easier to be angry at Crowley, at himself, than to think about everything they just took from each other? Everything they just lost?

Everything they could have been?

Aziraphale takes the memory of sunshine on his skin (Crowley's lips on his) and locks it away in a golden cage made out of faith; faith that Crowley will be there when he comes back.

Once he does (because he will, he will, he has to), there will be sunshine and warmth and Crowley, and they will finally be able to love each other with the sun and the whole universe as their witness.

No more shadows or shades of grey. Just the two of them in the light where they belong.

#alex writes good omens #good omens #ineffable husbands #crowley #aziraphale #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable divorce #the final fifteen #good omens kiss #aziraphale meta #fuck the metatron #idk what to call this flavour of post #character analysis and ficlet in one with some heartbreaking screenshots #see this is what happens when i watch the kiss scene frame by frame

[dee-morris]

Aziraphale's Decision

The Resurrectionists is a great minisode that shows us a significant little piece of Aziraphale's character arc, his realization that things on earth are never as black and white as they seem in heaven. But I just want to take another look at this heartbreaking moment here.

This was the turning point here, when he realized the practical need for dead bodies and how they're used. You can almost watch the switches flickering back and forth in his mind as he readjusts his world view.

After staring at this gif for a long time (and only crying a little), I've decided that it's not just a turning point in that specific narrative. It's also foreshadowing.

Check it out.

I don't have a gif unfortunately, but I know you see it too. This is his face after Metatron says, "We call it the second coming."

Once again, click-click-click go the switches. Initially (imo) he was going along with the Metatron to appease him and protect Crowley. This is the moment where his perspective shifts from "Protect Crowley" to "Protect EVERYTHING" and from that point on his path is clear.

He might have thought, just for a moment, that maybe Crowley was right and they really could just be themselves with each other and screw everyone else. But not with the second coming on the horizon. My dude collects books of prophecy, he knows EVERYTHING that's been foretold, and he knows that there will be no Alpha Centauri, no "us," no safety or freedom anywhere in the universe once shit gets real.

Whether or not he made "the right decision" at the end of season two is irrelevant. He made the only decision possible. Running away was never an option; it's not who Aziraphale is.

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #good omens 2 #aziraphale my beloved #good omens season 2 #meta #fuck the metatron #good omens meta #The Resurrectionists

[indigovigilance]

Continuity Errors

Crowley can stop time. We’ve noticed buggy things about time. Let’s talk about it.

I’m going to start with an overview of every time he has definitely frozen time in order to establish the mechanics of Crowley’s time-stopping power in the GO universe. Then, I’m going to talk about other events where Crowley may have stopped time, and it wasn’t (directly) shown to the audience.

or read this 3,500 word beast of a meta on Ao3

edit: if you're deciding whether or not to read this, check out the reblog notes!

Opening obligatory "do not put anything about this in Neil Gaiman's askbox"

Crowley freezes time locally, selectively exempting individuals

S1E2

In S1E2, Crowley freezes time at the corporate training ground to interrogate Mary Hodges, formerly Sister Mary Loquacious (played by Nina Sosanya, actor for Nina in S2). It may seem like she’s just hypnotized and time is progressing normally around all of them, but that isn’t the case. Immediately before Crowley hypnotizes Hodges, we can hear gunfire in the background; a few seconds before Hodges is released from the trance, we hear shouting and sirens. But during the time that Hodges is entranced, all we hear is three things: the dialogue, music, and what sounds like the ticking of a kitchen timer. 

We could do a little bit of extrapolation from the fact that the beginnings of gunshots and siren sounds are temporally very close together, especially depending on how we measure time. Crowley turns the paintball guns into deadly weapons at 36:59. Crowley freezes Mary Hodges at 38:47. A ticking sound starts the same moment. We also hear what we will come to recognize as the “pause time” sound, a sort of wobbly sound. The ticking sound seems to stop around… 40:07? Right before the line about lovely little toesy woesies? It’s unclear with the overlapping tracks. At 40:11 Crowley says “let’s go” and we can hear sirens in the background start now. Aziraphale then snaps his fingers and unfreezes Hodges at 40:17.

So during 191 seconds of screentime, 84 seconds of it was spent with time frozen, if I accept the ticking sound to be the indicator. If time was only frozen locally, meaning just the paintball grounds and not the nearest police station and roads leading to it, then emergency services had just over three minutes from the time the first live round was fired to arrival. If time was actually frozen globally except for Crowley, Azirarphale, and Hodges, then emergency services got there in 85 seconds, or less than a minute and a half. Maybe Britain is doing something wildly different than here idk but I think the more likely explanation for the event timing is that Crowley is only freezing time in a local bubble. The shooters stop shooting but the police are still driving towards them while Crowley and Aziraphale are interrogating an entranced Mary Hodges.

The case with Hodges is kind of confusing because the audience is presented with a false dichotomy between “frozen in time” and “hypnotized.” It’s actually both. Crowley has frozen time around the three of them, but Hodges, like Aziraphale, was exempt. It just so happens that she was also entranced at the same time, which explains as well why Aziraphale can release her from the trance, since our best evidence indicates that he can’t control time.

S1E3 & S2E3

In S1E3, Crowley freezes Jean Claude, the executioner at the Bastille. Immediately before, we can hear the guillotine, screaming and jeering outside the cell. As soon as Jean Claude is frozen, however (13:29, complete with wobble sound), there is complete background silence, except for the dialogue between our ineffable aristocrats. When Crowley restarts time, background noise restarts as well. This evidence indicates that Crowley froze time for the surrounding area as well as inside the cell.

In S2E3, Crowley freezes Mr. Dalrymple. We don’t have definitive information about how much of the rest of the world is affected since the scene takes place indoors on a quiet night and there are no external cues of time starting or stopping.

S1E6: Freezing Out Satan

In S1E6, not only are Crowley, Aziraphale, and Adam pulled out of the normal flow of time: it seems that they are also pulled out of normal space. They appear to be in an ethereal desert where we can see their wings, but we don’t actually know where they are. The way we enter, inhabit, and then exit this time-stop is completely different from any of the other three explicit timestop scenes: Crowley must use his whole body to summon the power to cast the miracle, they travel elsewhere, then he must use his crankshaft to exit the time-stop.

I take this to indicate that freezing time when Satan is near takes a lot more power than freezing time around Mary Hodges, Jean Claude, or Mr. Dalrymple. Presumably, the power a being has, the more power it takes to lock them out of a bubble to stopped time.

Time Stop Mechanics

Here are my key takeaways from analyzing these four scenes:

Crowley isn’t so much freezing all of time as pulling himself and Aziraphale (and sometimes Adam) out of the flow of time. The effort this takes is dependent on the entities that they are “pulling away” from. It is easy to pull away from humans, so much so that they don’t have to pull away very far and can occupy the same space in a bubble of paused time. When he is “pulling away” from Satan, however, he must pull away much further, all the way to another plane.

Crowley’s ability is so powerful that he can use it to escape Satan. He could use it to lock out other powerful beings, if he wanted to, but it would take a lot of effort.

Aziraphale, a being with power somewhere on the spectrum between human and Satan, could be frozen by Crowley’s powers. The fact that Aziraphale is still present and active during all of these scenes, unaffected by the time stop is only indicative of Crowley’s choice to exempt him, just as he does with a hypnotized Mary Hodges and Adam.

Crowley has stopped time on Aziraphale

In a previous post I have addressed the possible symbolic meaning behind the Honolulu Roast sign that suddenly appears behind Crowley in the S2E1 coffee shop scene. This addresses the symbolic meaning of Honolulu with respect to Aziraphale, but fails to address the “roast” part, which I have the opportunity to do now. I begin by establishing two premises:

Crowley loves Aziraphale and after 6,000 years knows him very well.

Crowley is a dick.

Crowley sits down at the table across from Aziraphale and asks him what the problem is. At this point, there is no “Honolulu Roast” sign behind him. The camera flips to Aziraphale as he (badly) tries to deny that there is any problem. When the camera flips back to Crowley, a “today’s special: Honolulu Roast” sign has appeared behind him.

What does Crowley do next?

Crowley roasts Aziraphale.

Crowley proceeds to read Aziraphale to filth, rattling off all his tells and putting him in his place for even daring to think that he could mislead Crowley about his internal emotional state.

While we’ve seen a lot more of his soft side this season, we cannot forget that the demon Crowley, at the end of the day, is a prick. He really did pause time just so that he could go get a chalkboard, write a pun on it, and hang it on the wall behind him like a display card for open mic night. He’s still going to help Aziraphale, of course. But he’s going to make fun of him first.

Let me reiterate: Crowley literally paused time, got up from the table, put up this sign, then sat back down in (as close to) exactly the same position (as possible) to fool Aziraphale into not noticing the pause, because this joke is entirely for Crowley’s own amusement. We have some cinematographic evidence of this besides just the sign itself: the lamp behind him has moved slightly, and the camera angle focusing on Crowley has changed. Literally, the left hand side of the frame gets cut off due to the repositioning. From a production perspective, this scene would have been shot all at the same time, so should not have changed angles. That said, they did a by-hand follow-in of Crowley walking in and sitting down, then switched to a dolly, but… I have faith that they could have matched the shot line-up practically pixel for pixel if they wanted to. All to say: changing the camera position before and after, alongside the other conspicuous changes, seems like it was a deliberate framing choice used to indicate that Crowley tried his best to get back into exactly the same position, but was just a little off.

But Crowley’s prank is troubling from a perspective of honesty and agency. Based on the way the dialogue progresses, it seems pretty clear that Aziraphale doesn’t know that he was frozen. Whether or not Crowley could freeze Aziraphale was beside the point until this scene where we learn that Crowley would, even for a really dumb reason like making a joke at Aziraphale’s expense.

Before moving on, I want to note that the sudden appearance of this sign could be characterized as a continuity error, even though it was the result of a deliberate action by an in-world character. Jettison your traditional understanding of “continuity error” as “production made a mistake.” In this universe, we can have continuity errors by virtue that Aziraphale is experiencing time as if it is continuous, not noticing that he functionally blacked out for a few minutes and that things have changed around him. This is not a show-level continuity error. This is an Aziraphale-level continuity error.

Crowley can reverse time

Credit where credit is due: it was this comment on the Ao3 version of my meta, The Erasure of Human!Metatron, that became an earworm that got me thinking specifically about Crowley's abilities:

So thank you, LoveIsLove <3

Let’s go back to the Mary Hodges scene, or actually a few minutes before. Our ineffable idiots get shot by paintballs.

“Look at the state of this coat. I've kept this in tip-top condition for over 180 years now. I'll never get this stain out.”

“You could miracle it away.”

“Hmm… Yes, but… well, I would always know the stain was there. Underneath, I mean.”

Aziraphale finagles himself a favor without ever actually asking for it. Full points, princess. But let’s examine the actual content of the dialogue. This cannot be a complete 100% bluff; Aziraphale is not going to tell a straight lie to Crowley that they both know is false about the respective nature of their powers. It must be the case that there is some truth to this statement. There is a fundamental difference between what Aziraphale can do about the paintball stain and what Crowley is actually going to do about it. Furthermore, what Crowley does is something different than a miracle.

Crowley then blows on the stain, it disappears, and Aziraphale looks quite pleased. Yes, yes, he cajoled Anthony J Acts of Service Crowley into doing his signature move, but also, he’s genuinely thankful that Crowley did something for him that he couldn’t do for himself, because miracles don’t work like that. Notably, Crowley doesn't snap his fingers or make any other gesture that we normally associate with miracles, and we don’t hear the miracle sound, which is further evidence that this is not a miracle, but something different.

If you haven’t already, please read my meta entitled Jimbriel, Satan, the Book of Life, and what it means for Crowley. It explains in depth and with evidentiary support my theory about how erasure works in the Good Omens universe. The Cliff’s notes version is that erasing something, whether it be a name from the Book of Life or a paintball from a coat, is akin to erasing a pencil mark on paper; it’s technically gone but you’ll always know it was there. Underneath.

What Crowley has done, then, is not erasing the paintball stain.

He’s reversed it.

When he blows on the paintball stain, he is reversing time in a microcosm of the universe, truly making it so that the paintball never hit the jacket. In a world full of rubber erasers, Crowley has the only Control-Z. When things are “erased” by the Book of Life, they are changed, but when Crowley reverses something, they never happened (making Beelzebub’s description of the Book of Life actually a more accurate description of Crowley’s power). It is something unique that Crowley can do that Aziraphale can’t, and we haven’t seen any evidence of any other celestial being pausing or reversing time. Please feel free to reblog with links to relevant meta if I’m wrong about that.

In true Neil Gaiman style, Crowley using this power to do something mundane like get rid of paintball paint was an incredibly benign and subtle way to indicate that Crowley has an immense, untapped power that we have not yet seen him use for any major purpose. 

I repeat: we didn’t see him use it. Because usually, like Aziraphale, we the audience are exempt from the time freeze, and we get to watch what happens. But this time, we were frozen out with Aziraphale.

Clock Theory revisited: a reinterpretation of “continuity error”

A summary of clock theory

Neil Gaiman’s ask and answer on clock theory

Neil Gaiman responded to an ask about the clock jumping forward from 9:25 to 9:40 before and after the kiss with a single sentence: “It’s a continuity error, I’m afraid.”

In the usual manner, Neil is not lying, but he is relying on you making an incorrect interpretation of his seemingly straightforward and innocuous but actually ambiguous and incredibly meaningful statement. As I stated with regards to the Honolulu Roast chalkboard sign, do not interpret “continuity error” as “production made a mistake.” Interpret “continuity error” as “Aziraphale believes that his experience of time is in lockstep with the actual flow of time and doesn’t realize that 11 minutes passed while he was frozen.”

Let’s consider the evidence:

Image at timestamp 41:04 “[Hold that thought!]” the clock reads 9:25

Image at 45:04 “If Gabriel and Beelzebub can go off together, then we can” the clock still reads 9:25

Image at 47:56 the clock now reads 9:40. 

Image at 48:14 the clock reads 9:40

There are two four-minute gaps, from the perspective of the viewer, and we have views of the clock face at both ends of each gap.

Gap 1, from 41:04 to 45:04, the clock hands do not move at all, nor do they in any of the intervening shots.

Gap 2, from 45:04 to 47:56 (or 48:14, as you prefer), the clock hands move 15 minutes.

The Occam’s razor, Doylian explanation for why the clock hands don't move from 41:04 to 45:04 is that the clock is a prop. It does not have any timekeeping mechanism, the hands don’t move unless some human being opens up the glass, reaches in there, and manually adjusts it. They weren’t going to interrupt filming this moving scene to move the clock hands minute by minute, so it seems pretty plausible that the fact that it doesn’t move is just an artifact of production limitations.

The Watsonian explanation, which I do not favor, is that Crowley has frozen time for just the two of them. They are in a microcosm all their own. If true, this would have an abundance of implications, such that they are actually free to speak to each other freely, which they don’t. So I feel like with that alone, we can set this aside, but I’m open to being convinced otherwise.

If we accept the “clock is a prop” explanation for Gap 1, it doesn’t really hold for Gap 2 that they moved it a full fifteen minutes. So much care and attention to detail was given for all other parts of this show; I don’t realistically believe that a production staff member moved the hands a random amount. The music carries us from Crowley’s exit to Metatron’s entrance seamlessly, yet more time seems to have passed in-world than on-screen. There are two possible explanations:

There was more material that was supposed to be filmed to account for 15 minutes that got cut

We are supposed to figure out that there’s some “Greek play” style shenaniganery afoot

I will debunk explanation #1 with simply this: David’s contact lenses would sometimes rotate so that the slit pupils were not vertical. This error was fixed by VFX in post.

You might assume, when watching Good Omens, that Crowley’s serpent-like eyes are created using contact lenses. Or perhaps you’d presume they’re CGI. Actually, they’re a mix of both.

“The CGI versions were usually because the contact lenses had swiveled in David’s eyes … and we had to fix it,” says Mackinnon.

If they could fix Crowley’s eyes in post, there is absolutely no reason to expect that they couldn’t or wouldn’t have fixed the clock hand positions in post, especially if it was someone’s job to reach in there and change the positions to try to maintain set continuity in the first place. Additionally, there is deliberate use of clocks to symbolize various themes across both seasons. A Doylian error like this is not something that would have been overlooked and survived into publication.

So we are left with explanation #2. Time has passed that we, the viewers, don’t observe. What was happening during that time that we missed? More importantly, who knows that this time has passed? Aziraphale doesn’t seem to, and it’s unclear what the Metatron does or doesn’t know.

Some fans have posited that the Metatron is doing the time manipulations, but canonically, the only entity we have observed manipulate time is Crowley. We assume the Metatron is powerful because the angels are all afraid of him, but we’ve never actually seen him do anything, and so have no primary evidence for this. All over, he’s got some big “pay no attention to the man behind the curtain” Wizard of Oz vibes happening; I’m not convinced he could miracle his way out of a wet paper bag, and there’s a chance that in Season 3 we’ll find out that he’s all bluff. Not so with Crowley.

My hypothesis is that Crowley froze Aziraphale and everybody else for a one block radius, including the Metatron, and did something important in the bookshop before it lost its protection. Please see my meta on Sovereignty, Citizenship, and the Bookshop for an evidence-based argument on why the bookshop was the only place in the universe that Crowley could have safely hidden something. Since Aziraphale is no longer the head of an independent embassy, whatever Crowley was keeping safe in there isn’t safe anymore, and needs to be moved. Universe time continued to pass and the clock reflects that, but Aziraphale and the Metatron aren’t aware that they were paused.

Which also gives us a new interpretation for the kiss.

The Kiss, revisited

Crowley didn’t want to send Aziraphale a message.

Crowley needed a plausible cover for the immense effort it was going to take him to freeze time against Aziraphale and the Metatron that he knew was standing outside.

How do I know he knew?

No nightingales.

Juliet. Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day:

It was the nightingale, and not the lark,

That pierced the fearful hollow of thine ear;

Nightly she sings on yon pomegranate-tree:

Believe me, love, it was the nightingale.

Romeo. It was the lark, the herald of the morn,

No nightingale: look, love, what envious streaks

Do lace the severing clouds in yonder east:

Night's candles are burnt out, and jocund day

Stands tiptoe on the misty mountain tops.

I must be gone and live, or stay and die.

No nightingales could be the end of a romance. I argued as much in my inaugural meta just six weeks ago (and what a six weeks it has been, people!) But “no nightingales” could also be a secret signal to two people who have a unique bond through Shakespeare that Crowley has realized he is not safe, and he needs to leave, and he’s trying to tell Aziraphale that without letting their spectator in on the message.

Now he has to stop time to secure whatever item he’d been keeping safe in the bookshop. But keeping Satan at bay required him to lunge upwards, using his whole body to freeze time. He can’t get away with anything like that here in the bookshop, that would give up the ruse.

But what if he lunged at the person everyone knows he’s in love with and violently kisses them on the mouth, his entire body tense with the effort of freezing time in the presence of two ethereal beings? No one would notice the difference, or think anything nefarious of it; a Class A surreptitious time-stop.

One last crackpot theory.

Aziraphale knows what Crowley did. Well, he knows that he froze time, and for the first time realizes that Crowley has locked him out, and that he used the kiss as a cover. The violation of agency, trust, and their romantic bond are all breaking across him in the instant that time restarts, after Crowley has gone away for 11 minutes and returned to almost, but not quite, the same position inside Aziraphale’s arms. It is an intimate act that Aziraphale is fully tuned into, and for the first time, he’s noticing the continuity errors.

His horror-filled expression is one of broken trust. But his bond to Crowley is too strong for even this to break it. He knows that whatever reason Crowley had to pull this trick on him, it must have been a good one. It must have been to protect him.

“I forgive you.”

***

One more completely crackpot theory based on the Gavin Finney interview at The Ineffable Con last weekend.

The camera was supposed to circle them. Finney says that this was to show that they are the center of their universe, and their world is spinning.

Okay, okay. But could it not also have represented the spinning of clock hands? I’m just saying.

Closing obligatory "do not put anything about this in Neil Gaiman's askbox"

Find my entire collection of metas here

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens meta #the final fifteen #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #neil gaiman #metatron #fuck metatron #clock theory #erasure theory #ivoc #book of life #good omens theory #good omens s3 speculation #the metatron #fuck the metatron #you guys have no idea how happy it makes me that people are actually reading this #I know it's a lot but thanks for sticking through to the end

[phoen1xr0se]

Nothing Lasts Forever - META

It's just really struck me how utterly bizarre the line "nothing lasts forever" is, considering that it comes out of THIS GUY'S mouth:

Don't get me wrong, this line has never sat right with me, it felt oddly placed and off - almost everything else he says and does in that scene could potentially be keeping in character with who he is, his arc, his trauma... but not this.

Why?

I mean, we're talking about Aziraphale here!

The one who literally collects ancient first editions and preserves them...

The one who wears old, worn clothes because they're comfortable and he likes them...

The one who almost killed a little kid because he wanted the Earth to carry on just a little bit longer...

The one who has desperately fought to keep his demon alive and away from the threat of Hell by any means necessary.

These are not the actions of someone who believes nothing lasts. He has spent his existence protecting the things he wants to last, often going to extraordinary measures, even going against his own moral code, consistently showing that he does, in fact, want it all to last forever.

So why say it?

The only explanation that makes sense to me is Aziraphale is trying to wave a warning flag in front of Crowley's face. Hes saying: "You know me, I know you do, you know me better than anyone and you know I would never say this."

The old "if you ever hear me say these words, you know I'm in mortal peril" bit.

The only problem with this, of course, is that Crowley has just confessed - all the things Aziraphale never ever thought he would hear him say, at least not yet, and not so openly... and it's the wrong timing, the worst timing ever, because Crowley is too wrapped up in his own emotion that he can't see what Aziraphale is too scared to say overtly (lots of sideways glances to Metatron just outside the window).

Aziraphale is waving great big "I am not okay help me!!" signs at him, saying all the things he would never say - "you're the bad guys" and "you can be my second in command" and "just like the old times"... and the big one, "I forgive you" instead of the "I love you" they both know it should have been.

The worst part is that Aziraphale expects Crowley to pick up on his signals, and is so hurt and frustrated when he doesn't... not just because it means he is putting his life at risk but because maybe Crowley doesn't know him after all. Maybe they aren't what he thought they were.

But can I leave this on a happy(ish) note?

With this in mind, I'd like to bring you back to the final scene with 'A Nightingale Sang In Berkeley Square' - most people believe that either Crowley queued it up to take Aziraphale to the Ritz, or the Bentley did it...

But if all the above is true, and Aziraphale has been desperately trying to get Crowley to see his coded messages, I humbly submit the theory that it was actually Aziraphale who set up the song to play.

One last attempt to show Crowley what he couldn't risk saying out loud.

Let's hope he got the message.

#good omens meta #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #neil gaiman #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #good omens 2 #david tennant #good omens fandom #michael sheen #fuck the metatron #go meta #die metatron die #no nightingales #nothing lasts forever #aziraphale defense squad #aziraphale defender

[dont-tell-my-mom-im-here]

#david tennant #michael sheen #good omens #neil gaiman #terry pratchett #aziraphale #crowley #good omemes #azicrow #aziracrow #good omens season 2 #good omens season two #metatron #fuck the metatron #ineffable idiots #ineffable husbands #ineffable divorce

[justaweirdonothingtoseehere]

so I’m not sure if we’ve addressed this but can we talk about how Aziraphale was probably going to confess his undying love in this scene?

Look at his face!

And the way he’s like ‘Crowley we’re fine’ when Crowley says the legions of the damned are at his doorstep. Aziraphale just wants to tell Crowley he loves him. And then Hell ruins it.

and then Crowley DOES confess his undying love, and Heaven ruins it.

See the way Aziraphale looks out the window? The Metatron is watching. The moment he’s been waiting for for 6000 years - the love of his life confessing - and he can’t even enjoy it because some asshole is watching.

My husband, thank you very much.

#ineffable husbands #ineffable divorce #im sobbing #good omens #aziracrow #final 15 #aziraphale #crowley #theyre in love your honor #fuck the metatron #i mean it

[goodomens-girlie]

WHO WAS GONNA TELL THE ACTOR WHO PLAYS THE METATRON IN GOOD OMENS IS GAY AND MARRIED??

HELLO??

#good omens #good omens s2 #good omens show #crowley #good omens fandom #aziraphale #neil gaiman #crowley x arizaphale #aziraphale x crowley #good omens edit #fuck the metatron #the metatron ew #the metatron #good omens s2 finale #good omens s1 #good omens s3 #good omens season 3 baby #good omens season 2 spoilers #ineffable divorce #gandalf #the hobbit #good omens theory #good omens the metatron #the ineffable divorce #good omens kiss #the metatron can die #i hate the metatron #fuck the metatron woohoo #can i get a wahoo #this is crazy

[brokendoor16]

Ok but can we talk about (or deny and forget about, either one works) the fact that in the WHOLEEE space between The Final Fifteen and Crowley and Azirophale's reunion in s3 Crowley is just kinda. Living with the knowledge that at any time heaven could make Azirophale completely forget that he ever existed.

Like. They could just fucking snap their fingers and make him forget.

6,000 years of friendship that he knows heaven sees as a weakness. And now they've got the chance to erase it all??

And we don't even fucking KNOW what happens to someone who's memory gets properly erased because of the way Gabriel stored his. Would he ever get it back?? Would he even know who Crowley is??

Like. That shit is fucking SCARY.

And (imo) that's probably one of the (many, many, many, many, many) reasons that Crowley is so desperately afraid of Azirophale going back to heaven- because of how easily they could make him forget (I don't personally think this'll actually happen in s3 BTW, because I don't think they'd use memory loss as a plot point more than once, it's just the fucking thought of it that makes me want to die😭😭)

#good omens #ineffable husbands #anthony j crowley #fuck the metatron #good omens season 3 #azirophale #I am unhinged about this show #Like I LOVE them #Even though they cause me severe emotional damage #But it's fine we live #Because they're fucking INEFFABLE #(I'm fine)

[beebopboom]

the look of an angel about to run out the door and tackle his demon and say “do it again”

#is that not how the scene went #mfer looked back 7 times #more like ready to risk it all #fuck the metatron #do it again #good omens #good omens 2 #good ineffable omens #aziraphale #crowley #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #ineffable spouses #metatron #aziraphale x crowley #good omens crack #gomens

[hyperfixating-rn-brb]

coffee theory where metatron drugs aziraphale<<<<<<<<coffee theory where the metatron literally offered aziraphale coffee or death and if he didn't take the coffee (go to heaven) he and/or crowley would get death so he had to choose between literal destruction or leaving crowley behind

#good omens #aziracrow #coffee theory #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #go2 #final fifteen #metatrash #fuck the metatron #either way really fuck him

[jackriverart]

I haven't seen anyone talk about the fact that the Metatron put Muriel in charge of the bookshop, specifically calling them "the dim one"

Like, he wouldn't trust anyone else with that amount of human knowledge, and specifically chose someone that he thinks won't be swayed by it.

Meanwhile, Muriel thinks that the Metatron specifically chose them because they're special and/or important.

It's yet another way in which the Metatron is such a slimy, manipulative person, and I'm really hoping for some character development of Muriel in the next season.

Also, this is just my own speculation, but I feel like Muriel is going to help Crowley again, except this time it won't be by accident.

#good omens #crowley #good omens season 2 #aziraphale #good omens 2 #ineffable husbands #good omens s2 #good omens s2 spoilers #go2 spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #gos2 spoilers #muriel #metatron #fuck the metatron #hes such a slimy piece of shit #I wish I could slap him #i hope he steps on a lego every moment of every day

[dee-morris]

Aziraphale Does Not Have Religious Trauma

We talk a lot about Aziraphale's trauma when we discuss his motivations and choices, particularly the ones we don't like. But what we don't talk enough about is the KIND of trauma he has, and it's not what we think of when we think of religious trauma. We have to remember that everything that Aziraphale has been threatened with and terrified by in his existence. It's REAL.

When a human has religious trauma it's generally because they've been abused and conditioned by threats of hell and damnation and judgement and so forth, and part of the healing process is realizing that it's a bunch of bullshit from an abuser with a power trip. That's not the case with Aziraphale. The angels are mostly bastards, but I'm willing to bet most of them believe in the Great Plan and genuinely believe in what they're doing. Because God is real, hell is real, and you really can be tortured for eternity if you step out of line. Aziraphale saw it happen. I can't even imagine what that must have been like.

When he tries to stop Elspeth from digging up bodies, it's not from some vague moral qualm; it's very practical concern for her future. He knows hell is real and doesn't want this young woman to suffer. And the excitement in his face when he realizes that it's more complicated than that and there are moral justifications for it. "Good news, I've found a work around!" Aziraphale the rules lawyer my beloved. He's managed to survive all this time by finding justifications for evading the rules, but when the most powerful angel in heaven drops in for coffee and a chin wag, that's not an option anymore.

I just really feel like we need to have this in the front of our minds when we're answering every Why? with "Trauma." I mean, yes he has trauma, but it won't be cured by developing stronger self esteem and giving heaven the finger. (Satisfying as that would be.) It will be cured by tackling the source and ending the very real physical threat that heaven poses to himself and Crowley.

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #crowley x arizaphale #aziracrow #good omens season 2 #good omens 2 #crowley good omens #aziraphale my beloved #fuck the metatron #Good Omens meta #heaven is terrible

[aziraphalalala]

I love how the Metatron is so obviously the toxic boss. Throwing down one Prince of Heaven is ok, but it happening again makes it LOOK like an institutional problem?

Honey, it’s you. You’re the institutional problem.

#Meta on the Metatron #i found yet another reason to hate his guts #Had a boss like that before #It was always everyone else that was the problem #good omens #good omens 2 #ineffable idiots #ineffable husbands #air conditioning #consenting bicycle repairmen #aziraphale #crowley #crowley x aziraphale #aziracrow #Fuck the metatron #Also fuck the metatron

[abbybubbls]

I think about what Quelin Sepulveda said in an interview about how Muriel going to Earth is like going to Disneyland and is pure sensory overload for them. It's cute at first, but then the more you think about it, you're like "Oh no, wait a minute..."

Of COURSE Earth would be sensory overload because Muriel has been sitting in an empty white space for six thousand years. It's basically solitary confinement because every few hundred years, someone visits to just ask a question and then leave. Earth has all these kinds of colors Muriel has never seen before, noises they never heard, smells they never smelled, it's crowded like crazy, all kinds of things Muriel has never experienced before! They only read it all in records they'd file!

AND THEN THE METATRON JUST UP AND LEFT THEM ALONE HERE??? I know he's supposed to be a dick, but REALLY? Does he have ANY IDEA how damaging it is to just abandon somebody on Earth when they have little to no experience on the planet at all?? He must not because holy shit!!! In every meaning of the words "holy shit"!!! He's a piece of holy shit!!!

#fuck the metatron #abby chats #good omens #good omens 2 #muriel #quelin sepulveda #the metatron #muriel my beloved #i'm formulating a comic as we speak