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tteokdoroki · 6 months

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ೀ⋆OCT 16TH CLUELESS ━━ megumi fushiguro + step-cest !

୨୧ — caution, you are now watching. megumi fushiguro + step-cest. are you totally buggin’ or is your college-goer, goody two shoes step-brother kinda into messing around with you? (7.6K)

୨୧ — rated r. minors, blank and ageless blogs do not interact ! nsfw, heavy smut, dark content, characters aged up to 20s, college!au, enemies to lovers (?), step-cest, photos, videos, fingering, choking, praise kink, panty sniffing, body worship, riding stuffed animals, daddy kink, soft sex, unprotected sex, bimbo-ish + fem!reader, step-brother!megumi fushiguro.

୨୧ — director’s note. lets gooo another kinktober installment! i actually haven't written for megumi in ages and this is kinda long so...i hope this is okay? sorry this is late btw, please enjoy! <3 - m.list ⋆ kinktober m.list ⋆ taglist ✧

let’s get one thing straight.

not all daddy’s girls are dumb.

on the contrary, you’re actually highly intelligent and thoroughly educated — graduating at the top of every single one of your classes in high school, despite negotiating a fair portion of your grades with your teachers. after school, however, you couldn’t quite figure out what you wanted to do and everyone else you knew spent their time growing up around you. daddy wanted you to go to college, get your degree so you could find your footing in the world…he would even pay for it too.

but like every other twenty-something year old girl your age, you were completely and utterly clueless about the direction you wanted to take.

perhaps that was the reason as to why your step-brother, megumi, annoyed you so much. indoctrinated into your family unit of two (yourself and your father, of course) — megumi had joined you to play happily-family when his mother married your father. their fast-paced union didn’t last long, however, for your parents were quickly divorced by the new year…and apparently, you can only divorce people. not children. meaning that your older step sibling had decided he would much rather stick around for the long haul.

it could even be said that megumi fushiguro was an even bigger daddy’s boy (or kiss ass) than you were a daddy’s girl. he went to college on daddy’s money, ate on daddy’s money and got jobs using daddy’s money and power. now, he’s some big time hot shot at an environmental law firm and it irks you just how much your father is pushing for you to be just like megumi. in everybody’s eyes, your step brother was the picture perfect child, an example to follow, a fine gem.

and since your father liked that so much; likes how responsible and diligent megumi is — it would explain why your older step-brother could get away with sneaking up on you in your own house (favourite child privileges). “what are you all dressed up for?” the husky lilt to his deep voice sends shockwaves through your system and a shiver down your spine, making you jump away from the fridge you’re rummaging through.

“a party.” you say frigidly. the dark haired male makes a face and you roll your eyes at him in a disapproving manner. as if megumi was in any position to judge you for your plans and late night endeavours. he was a boring old college student clinging to his younger step sister whilst you were doing society a favour and helping your friend get together with the guy she liked.

it’s what you do! helping the less fortunate instead of studying for some boring piece of paper and graduate degree.

you were such a good person.

turning away from the cool air and dull hum of the fridge freezer, you tuck a few juices to be used as mixers for the party into your bag — ignoring the heaviness of your step brother’s admiral blue gaze as it slips over the curve of your waist, the expanse of your thighs and the bounce of your chest peeking out from your skimpy little get up. it’s funny, how you’ve never liked the way boys have looked at you in the past — but something about the way he drinks you in as if you’re the last glass of water on the plant makes your legs shaky and your breath turn short and…

“can i come?”

with his lips pressed into a thin line and his emotions hidden behind the perfect mask of his perfect face — megumi slams the fridge door shut, to make you squeak again. his brows raising expectantly while he waits for your answer. “a-as if fushiguro.” you huff in annoyance, jabbing the older step-sibling in his shoulder as he towers over you. “aren’t you too old for house parties? i wouldn’t want you to cramp my style.”

“i’m not that much older than you.” he laughs, it’s melodious sound sending a warmth through your body.

rolling your eyes, you snap back. “you’re old enough.”

you make yourself small as you pass by him, attempting to escape his suffocating presence. he makes you feel weird, and you don’t exactly hate it — sure megumi is annoying, snarky and a little mean but he’s… attractive, like next level attractive. he’s got those dreamy sea-storm eyes that make you feel as though you’ll die and go to heaven, a sexy smirk that gets you hot and bothered even if it’s not directed at you. all of your friends have had crushes on your step brother at some point, ones that cause jealousy to brim just under the surface of your skin, pricking you like a thousand tiny needles. your jealousy totally doesn’t have anything to do with you trying to hook your friend up tonight by the way (lying to yourself makes you feel better).

however, feeling this way about megumi is wrong, nowhere near normal. anybody could have told you that — it’s just that your family relationships make things complicated and you don’t want to make this weird between you both. you’d never admit it, but you do enjoy the back and forth sibling-like banter the two of you have. would ruining that be worth it? even if your step-brother was like…everything you’d ever wanted in a guy; not like those snot-nosed, unhygienic, monkey-brained losers you used to go to school with.

instead, megumi was smart, established and with his future practically set in stone. maybe that’s why you picked on him, why you acted like a spoiled brat whenever he was around, why you pretended to despise his every existence and wish he’d never become a part of your family. because megumi constantly reminds you of your failures or what your future could be if you put your mind to it and actually tried.

“maybe, college guys like me wouldn’t seem like such losers if you actually gave furthering your education a shot,” your step brother cuts through your thoughts, stalking behind you with his hands in his pockets as you leave the kitchen and head towards the foyer — getting ready to head out for the party. “just do what your daddy wants, angel. go to college, get your degree so he can get off my back and you can be smart like me. yeah?”

“and why would i listen to you?” there’s nothing you can do to shake him — your older step brother tailing you as if he’s your own personal guardian. he stops walking when you stop walking, bumping into your back, while a shocked whimper lays flat on the seam on your lips.

megumi passes you a jacket (which you slide on by yourself) whilst he chuckles again, the sound rumbling in his chest and through your body pressed hotly against his. “‘cause i’m your big brother.” his voice is almost scolding, playfully so, holding a darker tone that you almost recognise as lust whole his larger-than yours hands force their way down to the fat at your waist. “now c’mere, let me fix your outfit. can’t have you goin’ out like this…” megumi squeezes your hips, using his grip on them to spin you around so that you can face him.

you expect him to tell you to cover up more — that your pretty white dress is too short and that you’re too promiscuous. what you don’t expect is for the dark haired male to sink to his knees before you, soft and attentive fingers sliding up your inner leg to fix your thigh-highs as that have slipped down. you barely manage to choke back a needy moan.

he doesn’t let up on the eye contact either; only serving to fog up your pretty little head. “s-step brother,” you manage to remind him gently, finding your voice.

fushiguro rolls his eyes, poking his tongue into his cheek. “that was your take away, pretty girl?” he doesn’t stop touching you, going as far to peek his head up your skirt — pretending to finish fixing your socks despite the subtle press of his nose against your panties and pinging them against your backside once done fondling you. “there we go, better.”

he even goes as far to pat your bum in accomplishment too.

you feel pathetic for letting your step brother touch you in such a taboo way, failing to push megumi off. but he’s never been so bold and you’ve never wanted him more — craving megumi through an insatiable burning in your chest. there’s always been a sexual tension brewing between you both, fuelled by your banter, your rage and mischievousness but how could you act on it?

megumi was practically family. your family. it would be weird. you couldn’t be anything more without crossing the line of what’s deemed acceptable and what isn’t for step siblings. you have to remember who he is to you, an older brother, a menace to your friends who crush on him and someone who had called you selfish once upon a time.

finally snapping back to reality, you force yourself away from the tendrils of your step-brother’s grip — swiping your purse from the entryway table and storming towards the door. “you’re buggin’ gumi!” you squeak from the porch. “stop being weird a-and stay out of my room!”

the door slams harshly as you vacate the property in favour of the party, practically running down the steps with a rapid shake of your head. doing anything you can to rid yourself of all thoughts concerning the enigma that is your older step brother.

the party doesn’t help, and instead ends up a total disaster.

your plan to set your friends up completely falls apart when your ex-best guy friend decides to make a move on you on the way home and drops you off in the middle of nowhere after rejecting him. to top it off, some asshole robs you for your fendi purse at a gas station and makes you lie down on the ground in your matching designer dress!

the whole ordeal nearly reduces you to tears and forces you to call the one person you’d been trying to forget about all night. megumi.

he picks you up without a word of protest, but you swear that you can feel his disappointment radiating off of him in thick, asphyxiating waves. “please don’t tell daddy,” you had sniffed, eyes big and teary. and megumi can’t bring himself to blame you or to be mad at you because you’re so sweet and sensitive and a little too good for this world. that and you have no idea how much seeing you cry fucks with his head.

“you’re a smart girl, baby.” he’d replied softly — though his eyes were hard and his grip on the steering wheel even harder, indicated by the white of his knuckles. “you shouldn’t be messing around in places like this. it’s exactly why you should be in college.”

like the good big (step) brother he is, fushiguro sneaks you back into the house without a word to your watchful father. instead, he spends the rest of the night comforting you with silly cartoons to heal your inner child. deep down, it means a lot — usually the two of you would argue over control of the remote, and he would always win. this time, megumi lets you be.

“i don’t think i’m cut out for college,” you sigh after a moment’s silence, ren and stimpy providing the backing track to your vocalised thoughts. “‘m not much aside from my pretty face.”

fushiguro rolls over so that you lay side by side, nudging you with his elbow playfully. “what would you do instead?”

“i dunno,” growing bashful, you tuck your face into your shoulder — afraid that he might laugh. “start a fashion business, give people make overs? i think i’m good at that.”

“you’re good at a lot of things, angel. and making people feel god about themselves is one of them,” rather than belittling your dreams, tearing them down like you’d expect — megumi encourages you, flashing you a small yet supportive smile. “you take care of people.”

flustered by his praise, you lean into megumi’s side — playing footsie with him at the end of your bed shyly. “you’re better at taking care of me, though.” you whisper, nearly missing the way his eyes drop to your lip-gloss smudged lips.

“yeah? s’what big brothers are for, right?” he whispers back, a breath’s width away from your lips, nose inches away from nudging yours as if he’s going to kiss you. he wouldn’t be your step-brother if he wasn’t so full of annoying surprises, instead of pulling you into a lip lock — megumi grasps at the remote on your other side in an attempt to change the channel to something more boring and scholarly.

you protest in the form of a sibling play fight causing you both to roll around in the sheets — fighting for the remote or perhaps dominance over the sexual tension that thickens the air. heat rises throughout the room and your wrestling turns to megumi pinning you to your babyish pink sheets, straddling your waist. he grips your wrists, clasping them together between his large, veiny hands and forces them above your head.

everything happens so quickly, yet so slowly and all at once. one moment you’re fighting like siblings do and the next — megumi fushiguro is finally kissing you, tongue lapping at the crack between your parted lips from where you’ve gasped in shock. tasting every ounce and every essence of the remainder of your gloss, breathing weightily into your mouth as if it’s a relief to have it pressed against his own. you swallow everything he gives you and drink up his saliva as it pools into your mouth to the point where your head spins and you feel like he’s spiked you with arousal.

this is wrong, on so many levels. as if you would ever make out with your step brother. but this isn’t some kind of twisted dream, it’s a reality you find yourself basking in. you pull megumi onto you by the roots of his dark hair, mewling each time your lips slot together perfectly and whining when his hips start to jut down to meet the softness of your tummy. or when his large hands push and pull at sensitive parts of your body.

“you’re nothin’ like those college girls.” he tells you once you break apart for air. megumi’s nose nudges your cheek and his kisses dive lower into the crook of your neck while he waits for you to catch your breath. “you’re softer, prettier, you’re—“

he lets go of your wrists.

tilting your head back into your plush pillows, your shaky fingers tangle in the dark, unruly curls of your step brother’s baby hairs. “i’m what?” you tease through a series of pretty little moans, like music to megumi’s ears. you feel him twitch against your inner thigh and the temperature of his body spikes to a sweltering degree.

“perfect.” his rough tongue swipes over your prominent collarbones and over the fabric of your dress, slipping under the crevice where your breasts meets your rib cage. using his teeth, fushiguro pulls down your dress until it inches off of your shoulders, revealing more of your skin marked with scars, beauty and stretch marks. it comes off easily, exposing you to a pair of hungry, murky blue eyes. the dress remains bunched at your middle.

you must be tripping out — you’ve never seen this look in your step brother’s eyes before. he stares up at you, lips swollen and breath ragged, as if you’re the last meal on earth he’ll ever get to taste. the sexual tension was never obvious to you, and while you’ve always found megumi weird — it didn’t mean you disliked his company.

“quit staring,” you whine, arching your back into megumi’s touch as it drags across your searing flesh. “it’s weird…you’re making it seem like it’s a bad thing…”

he yanks down the front of your dress, smooths down the valley between your breasts and over your tummy as they rise and fall with each of your baited breaths. “you don’t like it when i look at you, pretty baby?” then suddenly, his thumb slips back over your naked nipple, curling your sensitive areola before applying a gentle pressure that makes you jolt up the bed. “there’s nothin’ bad about you.”

fushiguro’s grip runs down to your sides like an easy stream of water, grasping at any flesh he can while simultaneously pulling your hips up to meet his — slotting perfectly against your body to make sure you can feel how hard he is for you. “i’m not like those college girls you’re usually into…” comes your shaky whisper. “‘m too dumb.”

it’s weird, megumi’s never made you nervous until now.

“no. you’re smart, you’re perfect… you deserve more than the guys that you’re into. you shouldn’t waste your time.”

his steady hands slide over the curve of your ass, dip beneath the hem of your dress to play with your doughy thighs and every note of his praise is sung over your quivering body.

“so what?” you go on, stepping into the dark to explore whatever the fuck this is with your step brother. “i should waste it on college boys like you?”

the tail end of your words are lost in a gasped breath as megumi nudges a knuckle against the crotch of your underwear — chuckling softly at the wetness that pools in the seat of them. “you would be if you came with me.” a sort of sick and twisted expression, morphs on his handsome face. one that’s usually so stoic and unreactive to your whines and mewls. but this version of megumi seems to like watching you squirm, revels in the way your hips buck up on instinct the further he presses his fingers between your sticky, viscous folds. “god, sweetheart. your princess parts are already so wet for me.”

heat flashes across your face, accompanied by the unfamiliar twinge of lust you for megumi you feel buzzing beneath your skin and swirling with the blood in your veins. the way he coos down at you, eyes hooded and tone condescending — it only serves to cloud your judgement and your mind. you shouldn’t be doing this. but you want to. so badly.

“shut up.” you huff and look away, eyes threatening to roll back into your skull as megumi flicks at your clit from over your skimpy panties. the more he plays with you, rubs at his little sister’s cute pussy, the more your thighs twitch apart — revealing the treasure between them to his dirty-minded gaze.

the groan that follows vibrates around in the cavity of megumi’s chest before shooting down to your glistening core as it convulses under his fingertips. “you’ll miss me when i go back, don’t deny it.” he tells you like he knows you, voice horse with growing desire. “you should really come with.”

you scrunch your nose up at his request — of course he would choose now of all times to be annoying and tease you about college. “as if, megumi.” you warn, though it’s hard to stay mad at him when he presses two fingers against your spasming entrance, azure eyes darkening at a stream of your arousal dampens your panties — defining the shape of your puffy folds even more.

“yeah, yeah. i know, baby. not the time, huh?” megumi hums in amusement, gaze flickering up to your face to watch it twist with euphoria as he continues to pinch and rub at your cunt until your chest is heaving. “you want it that bad. wanna be touched so bad. pretty girls like you can’t do anything without their big brothers...” while he rambles over the drool replacing logical words on his tongue, your step brother pulls his hand away from your sex briefly to push past the lace scalloping on your underwear and access your wetness. “all this, ‘cause of me?”

“all ‘cause of you.” you breathe the words out like they’re air and nod shyly at your own admission despite the high pitched, babyish tone. to let your stupid older step brother know how much he affects you is embarrassing, borderline humiliating, but you can’t help but fall into him. megumi rewards you with two fingers stroking their way past the tight ring of your entrance, curling instantly to explore your gummy, oozing walls and locate the exact spots that make you tick.

he presses a chaste kiss to your sweaty cheek, body hunched over your shaky one as if to shield the scandalous sight from the world. his little sister split open on his fingers, drenching him in her scent and her slick as fushiguro scissors them and fucks you silly. “mhm, that’s my girl. so nice for me and my fingers. i like you better this way,” he slurs, long and dark lashes (ones that you’d die for) fluttering against your skin as his digits move faster and faster within your selfish, ribbed walls. “when all you can do is cry and make those pretty noises, instead of being a little brat to me all the time.”

fushiguro pauses his ministrations, forcing you to wriggle and writhe and chase your pleasure for only a moment. “m-megumi!” your hips jut upwards in an attempt to coax some friction out of him, anything on your pulsing clit or against your pleasure spots dotted along your insides. “p-please. fuck, gumi— i need it.”

he only smiles, his thumb finding your clit and his fingers pick up the pace — bearing down on your g-spot with every thrust into your tight heat. “that’s what i like to hear, none of that back talk. just your pretty voice, beggin’ for me.” he sweet talks you over the dirty, lewd and squishy sounds from your thoroughly fucked cunt as they ring out into the sex tainted air. they form a chorus with your hiccups and pathetic bleats for more — and if your body is a choir, megumi fushiguro is the conductor. he guides you to the gates of heaven, feeds you pieces of pleasure from the grapevine of sun and you let him.

because he’s your big (step) brother, and you trust him after all.

“fuck, you’re so pretty. could watch you make a mess of me all night.”

the bricks bliss build up in your lower tummy, cemented together by megumi’s relentless fingers pumping in and out of your slick sex. you’re the perfect vision, a sight to behold — darling gem eyes shiny with tears, tongue tied to the roof of your mouth by strings of saliva and your body doused with a glimmer of perspiration. your step brother can’t help but create a copy of you grinding against his hand on his mind. filing it away for later.

pulling his fingers from your selfish heat, megumi brings his hand down against it in a harsh slap — his entire body shuddering at the surprised wail you let out, and the stream of juices that fly up his arm as a result. “ooh, baby. what a pretty noise you just made.” he laments with a rough voice, soothing over the spank with soft flicks to your swollen clit. “can you do that again for me?”

he doesn’t give you the chance to answer, spanking your pussy again, and again and again until his head is heavy with the sounds of your broken moans and your panties are soaked all the way through — darkened by the running two of your sweet honey nectar that allow his slender fingers to slip back inside you with ease.

they tease at your stimulated walls and push and pull your tight little hole — and you swear you can practically see the stars that line the night sky with every new sensation. fushiguro is in no better state, cock painstakingly hard and straining against the insides of his sweats while his cool midnight eyes drink in the way your hips stutter and struggle to keep up with the pace of his digits inside of you.

“‘gumi… i think i—“ your words escape you, drowned out by your own pussy as it squelches around megumi’s fingers.

he kisses your forehead, contrasting my soft compared to the way he stretches you open and preps you for his cock. “i bet that feets good, huh? you feel like you’re gonna cum.” his tone turns into a mocking one, deep enough to send shivers down your spine and threaten to knock down the wall of mounting pleasure in your lower gut.

tears teeter over the edge of your waterline, streaking a hot path down the apples of your angelic cheeks as your hips lift off the bed — chasing the high only your big brother could give to you. “feels so good, p-please let me cum, ‘gumi.”

you look to him for reassurance and permission, hiccuping as megumi pulls his fingers out of you to trace from your clit and down the length of your juicy slit. pride swirls in his blazing chest when your body jerks at the sensation, hips running after the source of pleasure. you’re such a good little thing, so pliant and naive — following after your step brother no matter what he does to you. maybe you’re right, maybe you’re a little too dumb for college. but it doesn’t matter right now, not with the way your creamy entrance clenched down on fushiguro lovingly, pleading with him to let you cum.

you’re so close and he knows it, he’d have given into you if he weren’t trying to make this last.

“actually, i want you to do something for me.” he stops right before you’re about to burst, dragging his fingers out of your pulsating pussy to smear your wetness across your tummy and thighs.

a babyish blubber bubbles up on the swell of your pouty lips, coated in a layer of salt from your free-flowing tears. “w-what? m-megumi! i was so close!” you say in a petulant manner, squishing your thigh together and trapping his hand between them as if to coax him back into making you cum.

“so spoilt, more like.” your step brother bites back, almost punishing you by removing his body from yours so that he can rid himself off all of his clothes. he tosses them off the bed, but not before pulling his phone from his sweatpants and setting it to the side.

you swallow thickly when his cock springs free and slaps against his washboard abs. megumi is lengthier than he has girth, his balls heavy with an incredulous amount of seed saved up just for you. his tip is pink, almost bright red but coated in a layer of pre that’s no doubtedly smeared along the inside of his sweats but it’s a delicious sight to see nonetheless.

now you really must be bugging. you’re most certainly clueless to have never thought of megumi this way before today.

your throat bobs when he grabs hold of his rock hard shaft, hissing at the first few lazy pumps he gives himself. “i want you to do something for me. then i’ll make you cum.” fushiguro proposes gruffly, locking eyes with you carnally. “put on a show for me princess, ride one of your cute little stuffed animals over there so i can make a memory for when i go back to college.”

his ask doesn’t register in your pretty little head, and megumi figures he might have left you dazed from withholding your orgasm. or maybe you’re distracted by the way in which he fists his cock, spreading webs of milky white up and down his shaft and over his mushroomed tip with each movement. you hardly notice the fact that he’s reached for his phone, setting it to record using his free hand.

“you hear me, pretty… fuck…girl?” he curses in a low moan, squeezing himself.

this time, your attention shoots to his face while your tongue darts out to wet your lips. “y-you want me to… fuck my stuffie?”

you ask megumi so innocently, head tilted to the side like a sweet little puppy dog and he swears he might bust to you right then and there.

“fuck…yes.”

“and you won’t touch me?”

“not until i’m satisfied, princess.”

and like the bratty little sister you are, dress pushed down to your middle and makeup askew, you huff at your step-brother — all while grabbing your favourite and biggest stuffed bear to tuck against the ruined treasure between your thighs.

“you’re so fuckin’ mean, ‘gumi,” you try to keep your cool, but you’re too sensitive — lowering your twitching sex onto the soft toy slowly. “o-oh…”

he angles the camera perfectly to record you, zooming in on your cute little cunt as it slips and slides over the bear with ease.

even beyond the camera, you’re a sight for megumi fushiguro’s sore eyes, each of your curves and dips illuminated by the glistening beads of sweat that roll over the expanse of your skin – catching the low, warm yellow light from up above. he always knew that his little step sister was pretty, practically an angel, but up until now he’d relied soley on his dirty imagination to picture the way you’d look fucking yourself for him. the stuffed toy easily disappears between the meat of your pudgy thighs as you rock back and forth over it, nudging your clit against the nose of the fluffy brown bear.

“feels good, right?” he mumbles lowly, the sound vibrating in his chest. megumi can’t help but be engrossed in your every move, the soft jut of your hips and the bite down on your plump and shiny lips, the way in which your fingers dare to dance up the salacious softness to your curves and skin. “my pretty little thing. i can see why your daddy loves you so much. you’re such a good girl, listening to everything i say.”

megumi’s words waft over your mind like a thick fog of lust, darkening every pure thought you’ve ever had. your whole body twitches at their patronising air, dopamine crackling about in your skull and shooting down to the heartbeat swirling around your fluttering hole. it gushes and gushes, like an endless stream of erotica and glazes over the apex of your thighs like the shin of a sugary treat.

one that makes your step brother’s mouth water with anticipation.

each of your sweet mewls and whistle-tone bleats run through his ears like thick honey, rotting him from the inside out. perhaps that’s what makes megumi so perverted and what makes him crush on his perfect and prim little sister, you’re a fool to have not noticed it before. how he looked at you then and how megumi looks at you now, midnight blue and stormy orbs drowning with lust. your gaze flutters down to his cock, standing tall and flushed against his creamy white skin, neglected as it leaks all over his stomach.

“oh you like that, huh? you shake so much when i talk to you like that.” fushiguro starts to fist his cock faster, matching the speed at which you shakily circle your hips over the poor stuffed animal — panting as it’s fabric darkens with your wetness. “a daddy’s girl through ‘n through.” he teases while you throw it back for his phone.

sure enough, the camera picks up his warm chocolate voice as it coos its praises to you. such a good girl. ride it out princess. all of it fills you to the brim with wanton and desire, makes you crumble before the glaring lense of fushiguro’s phone.

“s-shut up.”

“uh-uh. and you were doing so well,” your step brother sounds almost cruel, reminding you of the reasons you didn’t get along before today. acting like a school boy picking on his crush, being mean to her because deep down he knows that she likes it. that you like it. “don’t be rude baby. put on a show for ‘gumi.”

he takes to palming himself more, precum slinging across his knuckles and down his thighs the more turned on he gets. it clings to every vein on his shaft, spreads to the weight of his balls and no doubt can be heard through the camera since slick and lewd noises of the both of you touching yourselves echo throughout your bedroom. megumi does his best to keep the camera steady, but he can’t help himself — following your movements and thrusting up into his closed fist to mock your pussy while you ride your stuffie for dear life.

you’re still so sensitive, but your big brother can tell you’re trying so hard to keep up for him — fighting off your next orgasm as it builds up strong in your lower belly. you want to please megumi, at the end of the day. a smart girl like you knows “that’s it, keep it movin’ for me…god, you make me wanna cum.”

you pout at the praise, rutting over the face of your stuffed animal as you breath heavy. it feels way too good, you’re overwhelmed by too many senses and megumi watching you spill your juices about the place doesn’t seem to help. dragging a hand up to your bare chest, you tweak your nipples and tug them until a needy squeal dancing on your wobbly bottom lip — doing your very best to please the dark haired college student.

you want him to cum, want him to memorise the way your eyes roll back and your moans and quivers — you feel so beautiful beneath his heavy, desire burdened stare. “m-megumi,” you say for the millionth time that night, squirming before his very eyes while you dream on the nose of your precious toy. “i-i’m close!” your hips burn holding back you release, exhaustion and just intertwining in your veins — combusting in your lungs.

clueless. you were absolutely clueless as to how it would feel falling apart under the caring gaze of someone who loves you so much.

“yeah, pretty girl?” fushiguro hums gently, giving his cock one last squeeze at the base — cutting off the stream of ore that he dribbles from the source. “c’mere, i gotcha.” he shuffles over to you on the bed, catching you before you fall with his lips pressed to your wet babyish cheeks. “i’ll let you cum, but only on my cock. you’ve got to stay good for me, okay?”

nodding timidly, you accept a few more kisses from megumi — the ones that he peppers across your face, before he manoeuvres you onto your side and nestles in right behind you. “say you want me,” the words coast along the back of your neck and your body erupts in goosebumps. his voice will always be like a dragon breathing life into a fire. sure to be careful, megumi lifts one of your thighs and hooks it over his slender waist so that he can better access your sluice sex.

he tugs your underwear to the side with one hand and positions his cock at your entrance, sliding the length of his shaft through the strings of your arousal glueing your pussy lips together. both of you hiss in harmony when his bright red tip grinds messily against your pulsing pleasure bud. your unused hole clenches around nothing, pushing out juices as if to claim megumi.

your head rolls back to rest on megumi’s broad shoulder and you reach a hand behind you to tangle in the dark mass of his sweaty locks — keeping him close. “i need you, ‘gumi. please.” you rasp weakly as his shaft breaches your silken walls, coating him in everything your body has to offer. you spoil megumi, giving him a moment to remember before he leaves for college again.

there’s a delicious residual burn from the way his girth stretches you out causing your cunt so selfishly squeezes down on every inch of your step brother’s milky cock. with a stuttered breath, fushiguro bottoms out until his balls are pressed hotly against your ass and his seedy mushroomed tip is just grazing your womb.

“just what i wanted to hear,” he purrs into the shell of your ear — nipping it tenderly. you blubber softly into the satin pillows, prepped with a fresh set of tears as you push back onto megumi to meet the push and pull of his dick into your tight, creamy sex. “you’ve always needed me, pretty thing. my precious baby sister, relyin’ on me for everything. even this.”

your entire body burns bright with desire for megumi, you’re surprised you’ve gone this long without him before today. maybe you’ve always needed to feel his sticky tip grind against your juicy walls or his hot breath fanning against your shoulders and neck. you’ve always needed your step brother to guide you in the right direction. you’ve always needed megumi.

“f-fuck, g-gumi!”

fushiguro fucks you slow and softly, pouring all of his affections into you — letting it buzz in the sex scented air between your salt slicked bodies. his fingertips leave their paw prints along your tiger striped thighs and soft tummy, he’ll kiss them better later, but for now he just wants you to know how much he’s always needed you. “oh i know pretty girl, i know.” comes megumi’s low, bristling simper — adding to the stacks of pleasure cementing together in your lower tummy. “you’re so good, taking me just right. i’ve always known you’d be good for me.”

your back arches away from the molten centre of your step brother’s chest but he refuses to let you run from him — wrapping a strong arm around your middle to anchor you and your pussy down on his throbbing cock. “i never wanted to ruin you.” he drawls hungrily, but that doesn’t stop the salacious buck of his hips upwards and the way his hands traverse over each of your perfect imperfections. “but you’re such a sweet thing… you always have been. god, baby, you drive me crazy.”

fumbling around on the bed, megumi gasps at the phone and hits record once more — propping the device up on the nightstand opposite you so that he can remain hands free. “this body, this princess cunt… the way you grip my hair—“ as if on cue, your fingers tighten at his dark roots and tug him down for a sloppy, spit swapping kiss. “everything about you, s’perfect.”

the room spins with ecstasy and your pathetic screams die in your throat at the feeling of megumi’s abs contacting against your back, his cock hitting that spongy spot inside of you over and over again. you drip sweet nectar onto the sheets, his pelvis and his thighs — tainting him with your precious sin. everything burns with exertion and exhaustion, so you’re forced to slump against your big brother and rely on him to carry you to the high heavens of pleasure.

he doesn’t disappoint, cupping your swaying breasts as you jolt up the bed from the force of his pounding thrusts, flicking at your nipples while keeping himself tucked in your squishy insides. you’re pleasured from every possible angle and it’s all caught on grainy film for megumi to take to college when he leaves without you.

“‘m so fucking happy… t-that our parents got divorced. s-so that i can…have you like this.” fushiguro tongues at the pulse point under your ear, giving you one hard thrust to emphasise the point, it makes you jump, pushing you that little bit closer to the edge. your step brother never stops pumping himself in and out of you, hardly giving you a second to breathe between sucking on your tongue and slapping a hand down on your slit.

“aren’t you happy?” he goes on to ask, carving the shape of his dick into your raw sex. “take a deep breath for me, gorgeous.”

megumi wraps a hand around your throat from behind, squeezing ever so slightly and your glistening doe eyes tear away from the camera to focus on him. you witness the stars align in his azure orbs, the adoration they hold for you and a cry-baby wail slips from between your cherry bitten lips in response.

“look so pretty with my hand around your throat ‘n my cock in your pussy… look at that. it’s like your body was made for me.” he chimes up again, watching the drool deep from the corner of your mouth as it hangs open with dry moans, like a a cute puppy panting. “how lucky are we?”

“o-oh! gumi!” you sniff blearily, not caring that there isn’t enough air in your brain to think straight. you’re swallowing down his cock and he’s leaking fat droplets of precum against the ridges of your walls — only adding to your wetness. megumi can’t expect a single logical thought to escape you this way. “‘m s-so glad. s-so lucky! so happy! i-i love you.”

the stuttered admission brings out the worst in megumi, causing him to lose his shit. your panties are rubbing his shaft raw, your pussy’s so good that he feels like he’s fucking high, not to mention you sound so pretty he could die here and be the happiest man alive. a feral desire takes over your step brother, his snapping his hips into you so hard that your headboard repeatedly smashes against the wall.

your panties are completely soaked through at this point, equally as ruined as your cunt… but megumi doesn’t care. “love you too. my good girl, my good fucking girl.” he coos, his thrusts growing animalistic and erratic — your bodies dancing to the tune of desire as you chase release. “can you cum for me, pretty? wanna see it, bet you’re so gorgeous when you’re cumming for me little sis.”

despite being fucked brainless, you still manage to do what you’re told — your hips back onto his from their own accord, puffy pussy locking down on megumi’s base to keep him inside. “i’m close… r-right there gumi!” you choke out.

“right here, baby?” is all he manages to respond with, moaning pornographically into your sweaty shoulder while he shifts the angle of his thrusts. “wanna feel you gush all fucking over me.”

that’s all you need to hear before your toe curling orgasm comes crashing down on you like a large tidal wave. the knot in your tummy finally unravels and you break beneath the pressure of it all, waves of your juices splashing out onto the sheets and megumi’s pelvis — rewarding him for fucking you this good. you cum so hard that it’s enough to force megumi from your twitching hole, expelling a musky scent into the air.

“f-fucking shit, fuuuck me…” fushiguro stumbles off the edge not long after, using the seam of your panties to finish himself off while you twitch through the aftershocks of your high. he just barely makes it, fucking your underwear and nudging his sensitive cockhead against your abused mound until he’s filling the seat of your panties with fat globs of white hot seed. “jesus…’hmygod, baby. you’re such an angel...d-did so fucking well for me.”

he peppers you with smooches until you’re calmed down enough to be rolled onto your back. megumi is careful to pull away from you, staying close while you sniffle and come back down to earth. he babies you throughout, lifting the rest of your dress over your head and waiting until you say he can move before grabbing you a spare shirt from your dresser.

“let me see you.” megumi whispers lovingly when he crawls back onto the bed to join you. he grabs his phone from the nightstand and ends its recording, pushing your thighs apart to snap pictures of your cum soaked undies and the thick white that clings to your fat pussy lips and clit. “perfect, you’re so perfect.

“i am?” you whinge — camera shy. but you don’t tell him to stop, letting your older step brother rub his sensitive and overworked cock over your crotch, smearing the last evidence of your orgasms against you for a quick video. another one that’ll be added to his spank bank for later. “‘gumi…” you warn once you start to feel overstimulated.

he chuckles at how whiny you are, tugging your clean shirt over your head before he pulls you into his arms. “i got it, i’m sorry.” rocking you both back and forth, fushiguro kisses the crown of your head. “yanno… if you’re so serious about not joining me at college. i’ll try and convince your dad to let you stay in town. as long as you keep up your promise and try to start a business.”

your heart skips a beat, and you cast a glance upwards at your step brother. “really?”

“really. if it means that much to you.”

sleep settles heavy in megumi’s bones and on his pretty face — one you didn’t realise you loved so much. “it does! thank you, ‘gumi,” you say quickly, pressing a chaste kiss to his jaw. “m-maybe you college boys aren’t so bad.”

“oh come on now, didn’t me fucking you stupid literally just prove that?”

“maybe.”

“so you’ll come visit me at college then. since you like me so much.” fushiguro quips cheekily, narrowly missing your swat to his chest.

you roll your eyes and try to unravel yourself from your step brother’s affectionate grip, but don’t hide your smile. “ugh! as if, don’t get ahead of yourself.”

but teasing megumi further only gets you dragged back into the sheets — two sets of laughter echoing throughout the room in what appears to be another sibling fight.

except this time, you’re not as clueless.

you know that something like this, and with megumi, means something much, much more.

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yunalinwrites · 2 months

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saved by the bell (chapter 2) | fushiguro toji x reader

previous | series masterlist | next

available on wattpad

summary: fushiguro toji never makes first moves--until he happens to meet the teacher of the son he hasn't seen in years.

strangers -> fwb -> lovers

takes place in 2006 around the star plasma vessel/hidden inventory/premature death arc; megumi is a first grader

about reader: female, around 30 or older, teacher, has a soft spot for megumi, speaks kind of formally, has daddy issues + abandonment issues

warnings: eventual smut, cursing, alcohol, smoking, daddy issues, abandonment issues, mention of child abuse/trauma, toji is initially kind of an ass, spoilers for the season 2 arc mentioned above

"Don't get how a puny thing like him can burn through a gallon in a week," he'd complained, watching the infant chug his bottle eagerly in his lap. "Damn FamilyMart workers are starting to know my name."

His friend turned back to face him, looking inside from the balcony as he took a drag from his cigarette and adjusted his tie.

"If you want him to look anything like you by the time you sell him off, you better get used to it," his friend advised. "Probably the cheapest source of protein out there."

Finally, the little boy lifted his mouth from the bottle, but only to let out sharp wails. At this, the man's friend put down his cigarette and came back inside.

"Not like they'll give me any extra money for it," the man grumbled, handing his son awkwardly to his friend. "He'll be strong enough. And fuck if I help the Zenin clan more than I need to."

Patting the baby's back gently, his friend made a suggestion: "You could always keep him. Learn how to raise him yourself. Spite 'em that way."

The man didn't appear to be listening, already having shifted his attention to the glitchy TV he'd gotten off the street and sinking into his cracked leather couch. Sighing, his friend laid down the now quiet baby beside him and headed towards the balcony to continue where he left off, his suggestion met only with the sound of footsteps as he was followed out.

"They'll make sure he's strong," the man guaranteed, taking a cigarette from his friend's pack. Once he'd successfully flicked the lighter at the end, he continued: "Probably gonna breastfeed him till age fuckin' eight."

And though he was met with no contest from his friend, he went on, with a breath of nicotine concluding, "'Just not something I'm made to provide."

***

Tossing the cap behind himself, he took a long swig straight from the jug.

He slammed the refrigerator door shut and leaned back against the counter, but--thanks to the lack of distance between everything in his cramped unit--this move forced him to meet the reflection of himself in the glass of the balcony door.

His friend seemed to have been right all those years ago. The incorporation of milk into his diet gave the man a body that he was, for the most part, proud of--mountainous biceps, chiseled abs, bulging pecs; the works. The only thing that irked him about his appearance, though, was his face--that scar, that fucking scar.

He vaguely remembered hearing somewhere else that protein was good for building tissue, which was a claim sufficiently evidenced by his body--from the neck down, that is. So it was both confusing and disappointing when he'd wake up in the middle of the night to take a piss and that nasty mark of his past would be the first thing he saw in his dirty mirror. Still, not really knowing what else to do about it, he took another sip and tried focusing his attention through the glass door rather than on it. In doing this, his eyes found refuge on the polka-dot umbrella he'd left out to dry.

It had been a little over a week since that night at the bar. It was still quite rainy here and there, so he found himself still using the item almost every night. It's not nearly as romantic as it sounds, though--at least not for you. He had mostly been using it to escort other women home.

To be fair, he had some self awareness. He felt worse every time he saw your name and number whenever he opened it for someone other than himself. But what was he supposed to do, return it? You hadn't been back at that bar since. Not that he was really checking he just figured if he was going to go out to do his nightly ritual, he might as well do it at that same joint. You know, in case you wanted your umbrella back.

And before you ask, no, he couldn't call you. He almost never, ever called first; it went against his morals, if you can even refer to them as that.

Again, he had some self-awareness. He knew he was kind of a piece of shit, so much so that even through the gray clouds and even among the 8-billion-some-odd people on His earth, he supposed God recognized him as such. So, just like how God decided whether or not the boats he bet on would get him out of this apartment, he assumed God also decided which women ended up in his web, and which would come back for a second night. By this logic, so long as he didn't make too many overt first moves, all broken hearts could simply be attributed to and excused by fate. It was a sort of heavenly restriction, if you will; he would sacrifice his initiative for the ability to keep being an absolute fucking asshole.

His sacrifices also included curiosity, he tried reminding himself; if he was meant to know something, then he would just know it already--so there was no point in wondering about you or, by association, his... that little boy.

Yes, there was no point in wondering how he managed to look that much like him, or where he got the balls to just follow curses around whenever he pleased, or why his name was Fushiguro, and not Zenin

Or, for that matter... fuck, what was his first name?

He headed towards the couch and took a seat, jug still in hand.

Shit. I don't even remember what it started with...

Forcing out a low laugh at this realization, he fished for the TV remote in between the cracked cushions.

Whatever.

He flicked through the channels with occasional sips from his drink, letting clips of people talking, singing, and laughing play no longer than a second before he cut them off with the press of a button. He kept spamming it, tapping and tapping, faster and faster, sounds merging together until:

Wasn't it an M...?

Placing the milk jug down on the dusty coffee table, he stared at the characters on the remote's number pad, his attention focused on a singular key in particular.

Fuck.

Putting the remote down beside him, he rubbed his eyes in distress, trying to massage the thought out of his head.

Goddammit...

He cursed His name, but as he used his arms to push himself up off his imprinted spot on the couch, hoped that God would forgive him just this once.

Hastily, he headed towards the balcony door and shoved the stubborn thing open. Snatching the umbrella with one hand, he punched in your number with the other, a firmness in his thumb. As soon as the phone rang with his outgoing call, though, whatever resolution that was just occupying his body had completely vanished. By the second ring, he was tapping impatiently on the rusty railing. By the third, he was trying to steady himself against it, which only resulted in a concerning creak. By the fourth, he'd headed back inside out of fear that he'd drop his outdated device, something that he couldn't afford. The fifth ring had his thumb just millimeters shy of the red button on his keypad, getting dangerously close due to his trembling, but then:

"Hello, this is Miss L/N speaking."

He exhaled after what felt like an eternity of holding his breath. As his lungs regained their rhythm, he felt his shoulders melt back down into relaxation, and soon, a smirk found itself creeping onto his lips. "Jesus--you really do talk like a princess."

"Um... I'm sorry, could I ask who this is?"

Still smirking, he took another deep breath and spoke up: "Think you left your glass slipper with me at the bar the other night," he started, absentmindedly studying the item. "But you made my job a lot easier by putting your number on it, Miss L/N Y/N."

There was a short pause, but then she realized: "O-oh! It's you--Oh my God, um... Hello..."

He chuckled lightly at her stuttered response. "It's me."

"So," he began again, "What are you doing tonight?"

For a while, nothing came through the speaker. He bit his cheek.

When she finally did speak, her tone was lowered: "I can't stay out late. It's a school night."

He placed the umbrella on the coffee table and took a seat on the couch, putting his free arm over the back.

"Won't take that long to return an umbrella," he pointed out. "Didn't realize you had something else in mind."

"N-no, that's fine, you can just--"

"I'm just pulling your leg," he interrupted. "How about now--what're you up to right now?"

That came out a little more eager than he meant for it to be. In an attempt to fill the awkward silence, he grabbed the milk jug from the coffee table and resumed his drink, gulping as he held the microphone away from his mouth.

"I'm out running errands."

"Where?"

Slamming his drink down--again, a little too eagerly--he reached for the remote and switched off the TV.

"Um..."

The hesitation was discouraging at first, but as her microphone betrayed her, it would seem that the aforementioned God was on his side today. In the background, he heard the familiar chime that indicated someone had come through the automatic door.

"Which FamilyMart is that?"

This time, there was surprisingly little hesitation: "...the one by the station."

And with that, he finished off the last few ounces left in the container and tossed the empty jug on the table, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Don't move," he instructed, grabbing the umbrella with one hand and pulling the phone from his ear with the other. Bringing his thumb back to that red button, this time with returned unwavering confidence, he finished, "See you there, princess."

***

The door chimed welcomingly as it automatically slid open, causing you to whip your head around in anticipation. To both your disappointment and relief, it was just a gaggle of teens looking for some after school snacks.

As you turned your head back to your shopping, your eyes caught on to something right next to the entrance: a bin of umbrellas, for only a couple hundred yen each. You sighed as you took your eyes off the salt in your wound. Your mother had taught you well enough to know how bad this was: a stranger knowing your name, number, and current location. So, really, the too-late sight of an alternative was just unnecessary on God's part.

But then again, as much as you didn't love the pattern she'd chosen, it would've been cruel to replace a gift from your mother. She also always said herself to pick public spaces for first dates and, given that the local high school usually wrapped up clubs around this time, more than enough people were coming in by the second. Just now, for example, a young couple walked in holding hands in their uniforms.

And this wasn't even anywhere near a first date anyway; he was just coming to give you your umbrella, that's all. But, also... Even if he were to stick around for, say, a cordial conversation about the weather, and, hypothetically, he did so long enough that it would only be polite to ask for his name... Well, you always did preach both manners and curiosity to your students.

Deciding that you'd overthought enough, you tried to direct that curiosity to the crackers, chips, and cookies in front of you. You scanned over the rainbow of packaging, searching for something that looked both appealing and healthy. Nothing in particular jumped out at you until you looked to the top shelf, focused on a specific bag. At first, you couldn't tell why you recognized it, especially considering you couldn't see all of it due to its height, but then you realized: Megumi's brought that one to lunch before...

The shelf was well over your head, but it seemed like the only employee around--the cashier--had gone to the bathroom, so you reached your arm up as best as you could. The bag brushed your fingers, which only pushed it farther back, so you had to employ the help of your tippy toes. You could feel it just within reach of your fingertips, as the crease in your flats dug into your feet.

C'mon, just a little closer...

"Need a hand?"

Suddenly, a muscular arm emerged from behind you, reaching over you and grabbing the bag with ease.

Planting your heels back down on the floor, you spun around and smoothed out your pencil skirt, only to look up and find him--him and his scarred face--startlingly close to you.

"Thanks..." you obliged, trying to look away as you gently took the bag of sweet potato chips from his hand.

Even after you had placed the product in your basket, he didn't back up, so it was almost hard to see his entire body. But, you were still able to recognize he was wearing the same thing as when you saw him for the very first time: a black short-sleeve shirt and gray sweatpants.

As you had learned to make note of in your students, wearing repeated outfits that didn't fit the season or didn't fit the wearer was typically an indicator of a low-income background. In this case, it wasn't so much that the clothes were ill-fitting... it was just that the waistband of his pants were hanging loosely, dangerously low on hips, and his shirt was.... Tight. Very tight. And thin, which was interesting considering the chilly breeze that came through the door with every customer. Along with that, you were feeling the air from the heavy exhales of his nose.

"My eyes are up here, Miss."

You didn't realize how long you'd been watching his chest rise and fall rather quickly.

"Sorry," you corrected shyly. "You didn't rush to come here, did you?"

He shrugged. "Said you couldn't stay out late. Wouldn't wanna keep you from your royal duties."

"Oh, I see... Well, I didn't mean to hurry you. You could've at least put on a coat."

He looked down to where his compression shirt hugged the grooves of his abs. "Didn't realize there was a dress code, Miss," he teased. "Am I being indecent?'

"I-It's not that," you stuttered. "It's still cold out, you know."

"Cold? It's spring."

"Yes, but you could still get sick. Especially if it rains. You know the saying, 'In like a lion, out like a lamb'?"

"With all due respect, Miss, I'm not fucking stupid."

As soon as the profanity left his mouth, he winced at his own words. He was hoping to keep up his gentleman facade a little longer, but he supposed couldn't hide his true nature forever. Taking off the wrist strap of your umbrella, he began preparing to never see you again.

But then you spoke, surprisingly calmly: "I never said you were. But you never know. People aren't born knowing everything, are they?"

He froze in his place, thinking about your words--about how they didn't hold even a hint of anger or hurt in them. He couldn't tell if that made him feel more or less guilty.

Hearing his silence and seeing the solemn expression on his face, you felt the need to apologize for your preaching: "Sorry... I guess I'm still in teacher-mode. I swear, it's what being in this uniform does to me."

Suddenly, he smiled, and his eyes were almost soft as they looked down at you and your dainty button-up. "It's alright," he rasped. His pupils definitely darkened, though, as they drifted lower, down to your form-fitting pencil skirt and your pantyhose-clad thighs. "Yeah, no, it's... it's fine."

Feeling you remove the umbrella from his hands, he snapped out of his gaze on your body as you spoke again: "Thank you for coming all this way to return it. I wasn't really expecting you to."

Cockily, he put his hands on his hips. "Yeah, well, I just happened to run out of milk, so you can thank God for that. I mean, I'm a busy man, you know? Part of why I rushed here."

You laughed. "Physical therapy, was it?"

He paused for a second, almost as if he forgot what he did for work, but resumed the banter soon enough. "Right, yeah. Got appointments left and right. Seriously, I mean, you should consider yourself lucky."

"Well, I appreciate you squeezing me in."

"I'll let it slide just this once, princess, but you'll have to pay a fee next time."

Your stomach fluttered at the prospect of seeing him again, but you still tried to hold your guard up around the near-stranger. "Next time...?" you questioned.

"Yeah. Next time you need physical therapy."

You laughed nervously. "I don't think I... understand..."

"C'mon, Miss. You're smarter than that."

You blushed, putting together that he probably wasn't talking about yoga balls.

"I'm flattered, but... we've only just met, haven't we?" you argued, though unsure if it was to him or yourself.

He shrugged again. "Don't usually meet my clients before I meet with 'em."

You were given an opportunity to turn away when you heard the door chime again. A young man and woman had come in to shamelessly ask for where the condoms were, though they weren't holding hands. And despite it being only around 5 p.m., they were obviously somewhat inebriated, which brought up a good point--you two had met before, and you'd done so at a bar, where it was common for such shallow appointments to be made. In context, it was a little less weird when you thought of it as him picking up where he left off, underneath that bar awning.

Still, you looked down instead of back at him, imagining how he probably did this often. "I don't see why you can't just find another one, then."

He sighed through his nose and shoved his hands in his pockets. For a second, you thought you'd said something wrong--he looked uneasy, dreadful almost. But just as quick, he combed his hair back and painted a charming smile across his face.

"Yeah, I guess so," he pretended to consider. "But I noticed something about you." He crossed his arms, showing off his veiny forearms.

"When you were walkin' away from me that night, you had this... sway in your hips." He looked you up and down, squinting his hooded gray eyes.

"Could sense an underlying condition, beneath that little dress of yours." His tongue peeked out of his pale lips, teasing the scar at the corner.

"Just sayin', in my professional opinion, something oughta be done about that."

You let out a shaky breath, staring up at him, eyes wide and cheeks pink. He certainly did have some expert words to say. Meanwhile, your teeth had a deathly grip on your bottom lip, so you couldn't come up with even a single consonant to respond with. Figuring that you weren't going to respond any time soon, he began to back off.

"I should probably get going," he told you, "but don't be a stranger, yeah? Ain't got a business card or anything but my number should be in your Recents."

Even as he walked away, you couldn't say anything, and the only movement made by you came from your lip managing to escape your painful bite. All you could find in yourself to do was watch, mouth agape, as he made his way to the fridges at the end of the aisle, not even realizing you didn't yet have a name for his contact.

As he grabbed the cold handle of the refrigerator door, he could see his now frowning reflection in the glass.

He was probably going to beat himself up later over all the creepy and corny things he'd let himself utter to you, but right now, he didn't think about that; he was just glad the conversation was over. Making a number of first moves and doing so in a FamilyMart snack aisle before it was even dark out--he couldn't even focus on why he'd come here in the first place. Whatever he was trying to do-which he himself wasn't even exactly sure of-it was stupid. He felt like a fish out of water, and all he wanted to do was jump out of his skin and drown himself in the current, never daring to swim against divine intervention again.

But as if he didn't regret coming here enough, he recognized another familiar face as he moved toward the registers.

"Ah, Fushiguro!" the elderly woman would always greet. "Just milk again, Fushiguro? That's good. Lots of protein. Helps build tissue. Huh? What's that, Fushiguro? You want a pack of Marlboros? Oh, you're just like my son, Fushiguro..."

He tsked. He always hated how that old hag managed to fit his name in at the end of every other sentence, loud enough for her half-deaf ears--along with the entire store--to hear. And of course, just his luck, she lived another day to work this specific shift.

He put the milk jug back as quickly as he could and searched for the most inconspicuous route to the exit. Of course, that just happened to be through the aisle you were still in. With little time to think, he swallowed his pride. Making his way over and brushing past you, he mumbled something about having forgotten his wallet as he briskly made his way to the door.

"Wait!" you called. Head darting between the milk fridge and the back of his figure, you moved quickly after him.

Frantically tossing bills at the cashier on your way out, you bolted out of the store, this time darting your head left and right as you searched desperately among the sea of other dark-haired pedestrians. You were considering giving up as you began to get dizzy, but then you saw him--the only tall, muscular figure outfitted in a T-shirt in this weather. You continued to run after him and, thankfully--since you opted for flats over heels today--you were able to catch up with him before the pedestrian light turned red again. He was already halfway through the crossing, but he stopped in the middle of the road, eyes widened in shock as you were bent over, leaning on your knee as you panted and held the jug of milk up towards him.

Realizing that you'd bought it for him, he took it from your hand and awkwardly obliged: "...Thanks."

You were able to stand up straight now, but your breathing was still somewhat labored as you spoke: "At least... let me know... your name..."

He hesitated for a moment, as if he didn't even know what his own name was.

"You know mine," you reminded him, impatiently putting a hand on your hip. "It's only fair."

His face was grave, but his eyes were narrow as they jumped everywhere around you: at the passing taxis and vans, at the salarymen flocking from their building, at the park fenced in. It seemed he found his name somewhere, but it wasn't as comically artificial as you might think: "It's Zenin. Zenin Toji."

"Zenin?" you confirmed.

"Yeah," he replied, swallowing away the dryness in his throat. "But what do you say we skip the formalities? Just call me Toji."

"Oh, um. Okay, then. Toji," you repeated, testing it out on your tongue.

A loud honk brought the two of you back to the reality of where you were, prompting you to finish crossing the street. Now back on the curb, you turned to him again.

"Um, Toji," you spoke, still getting used to the syllables.

"Yeah?" he answered.

"I, um... I want to make it clear I'm not looking to do anything tonight," you enforced, projecting as much as you could muster. "But I have one more thing to take care of, if you'd like to come along."

You had your eyes focused on the tips of your flats, so if he was in disapproval-which you assumed from his silence-he didn't need to do much with his expression to hide it. But eventually, you heard his voice, relenting with an exhale that could've been interpreted as both disappointed and relieved: "Sure."

And so, silently, he followed behind you as you traversed the city, inferring it was a path you traveled often as you didn't stop your pace once to look at a map or even the street signs.

It wasn't far from where you'd started; a few corners later, the two of you were in a residential area that he didn't recognize, although the shady alleys between dingy apartment buildings weren't much different from where he lived. He knew teaching didn't pay much, but he was still surprised that you brought him here.

"Just wait here a moment," you told him, and he did as you knocked on the nearby door with the small bag of groceries in your other hand. He waited patiently and, watching you do the same in front of the grimy door, he considered the possibility that you two weren't so different after all.

But then the door opened, and you said something, and you were only a couple feet away so he heard, but it was as if all of a sudden there were miles between you two.

"Hi!" you'd chirped. "Is Megumi home?"

Everything else faded into muffles. He watched, paralyzed, as you handed over your groceries to a young brown-haired girl who looked vaguely--uncomfortably--familiar, but he didn't process a single thing either of you said. All he could hear was that M-word ringing throughout his head.

Meanwhile, you continued to converse in front of the drab doorway, telling the girl that you had to get going because you had some business to attend to, unconsciously pointing your thumb in the direction of where you had left Toji. You bid farewell to her with a smile and turned to where you were just pointing but, immediately, your smile dropped, as did your eyes to the corner on the pavement where he'd just stood-as if you'd find him there, hidden among the weeds sprouting from the cracks in the sidewalk. But, no-it would seem that the man named Toji was already long gone.

***

previous | series masterlist | next - should b available by next week :')

#jjk x reader #jjk #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #fanfic #my writing #writing #toji fushiguro #toji x reader #toji x you

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baugojo · 2 years

Note

megumi and friends to lovers🥺 including neck kisses🥺

♡MEGUMI!FUSHIGURO friends to lovers

“Megumi..” you complained; your back pressed firmly on the bed you both laid upon, soaking in the sheets. you watch as the boy that laid next to you, your best friend, ignored you and continued to read the book your teacher had given you both.

It was a study review for the exam tomorrow; but you’d already been studying for three whole hours. You couldn’t do it anymore. “I’m so bored.” you whined; but megumi didn’t even look towards you.

“So go and do something.” He replied, bluntly. In which you sighed in dissatisfaction.

Truth is, you’d been crushing on this boy from the day you’ve became friends. The reason for this being because, when he met you, you both were much younger; and you tended to have little crushes on friends that are always there for you. no but this was different. It wasn’t just some little crush anymore. Now it was a full blown out feeling you got in your chest when you’d think of him being with anybody else.

you sighed, your lips forming in a frown. “Megumi, can we do something else?” practicality begging, but he didn’t budge. he did notice you staring at him a couple times, bored out of your mind; but all he could think about when pretending not to notice, was the cute faces you made when dissatisfied.

“Fine. C’mere.” He chatted, grabbing both of your arms and pulling you closer. He figured since you want to have a little bit of fun, but still need to get a good grade, he’d try something out. he sat up, leaning against the bed frame, pulling you in between his legs that spread open. his arms allowing you to now hold the study book in hand, as he made sure you propped up against him comfortably.

“Now we study.” He said, as if this was not a big deal at all. And maybe it was not; to him at least. You were nervous. It isn’t necessarily the first time you’d both been close like this; but it definitely felt different this time.

“But I don’t wanna study anymore-“

You were cut off by something you’d thought you’d never get from a guy like megumi. your face plastered with embarrassment; the expression giving you away, you couldn’t help but feel slight nurishment when his lips pressed onto your skin. he’d become very found of you now, leaving small but perfectly placed kisses on your neck; surprising you.

“M-Megumi what are you..”

“do you want me to stop?”

“No!”

the room went quiet; mainly because of your exaggerating tone when informing him not to stop giving you affection. In other words, you yelled. but today is full of surprises, cause he just laughed at you. He didn’t call you weird or push you away; he just laughed.

“then I won’t.” His small chuckle still wrapping around your ears, as his hands did too. as claimed, he continued to give you the sweetest, softest pecks with those glossy lips, while you read the next couple chapters of the unit aloud.

and after another hour of what felt like endless reading for you before, was just peaceful reminiscences of your favorite person, loving you.

you closed the book, turning around to face him. He was always so pretty, at least that’s what you thought. he looked back at you with a, “hm?” knowing you have something on your mind. So with all force and closed eyes, you kissed him. your lips clashed together with his; feeling a slight taste of your lotion after his mouth was all over your neck.

before even opening the crack of your lips, the kiss was over; you pulled away faster than you went in for it. Covering your face; you hid yourself from such a man.

“why are you covering your face?” He slid his hands in between yours, breaking the mask you’d formed for yourself. his hands then worked towards your checks, them resting on your jawline. His face fumed with pink of the very ends of his cheeks; though he acted as if he was unfazed.

Was the kiss unexpected? Slightly; but don’t get it twisted, he loved every little second of it.

“C’mere, do it again.”

#megumi x reader #megumi fluff #jjk imagines #jjk x you #jjk fluff #jjk x reader #megumi fushiguro #megumi fushiguro x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #jjk oneshot #jjk headcanons #megumi x you

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psychewritesbs · 8 months

Note

I was reading your post about the megumi character trope and this is related but not?

Anyways, as someone who likes both sasuke and megumi, and I've come to like sasuke recently as I've finally checked out naruto, but it's bizarre to me how superficial their similarities are and it's crazier how people reduce their characters to their aloofness or dar hair or things like that and use that as a way to judge a character overall when their character arcs are so different imo. I have issues with how sasuke's character was handled in the story, but I've become very fond of the things he did for the story overall, so no problem for me, but I'm not sure megumi's arc will end or proceed any similiar to sasuke's with revenge as the main motivation, or at least I don't think so, I'm a couple chaps behind, but yeah, the way both characters process their own trauma or how their motivations are different enough for me to ignore the superficial ways in which they are similiar

I say it's also tough liking both in fandom spaces because naruto is still really popular and jjk is in the spotlight currently, so fandoms can be tense with each other and it's exhausting to see the slander going every which way lol

They say this as a way to slander mgm, but the "Megumi will never be sasuke" is funny because I don't think he's trying to be???

HOLA!

WELCOME to THE ULTIMATE SHONEN BATTLE FOR THE BEST "QUIET AND ALOOF DEUTERAGONIST-KUN": MEGUMI VS SASUKE!

Who's better? Well... let's ask the internet...

ok nvm. NEVER ask the internet for an opinion. ESPECIALLY when the Naruto fans who think Kishimoto is the mother of all anime tropes get involved.

This isn't even a question of whether Gege took inspiration from Sasuke for Megumi because 1) Sasuke himself takes inspiration from a Togashi character and, 2) "quiet and aloof deuteragonist-kun" is one of the most prevalent tropes in animanga--the trope is not even unique to shonen, hell even the 3-man team isn't unique to Naruto.

Nothing against Kishi but... he's doing the same thing every mangaka or author EVER has done--copying tropes.

At least Gege subverts them.

Let's taco'bout it more under the cut because I have many words to vomit about the topic.

Also... man, this is a fantastic conversation to have because, based on the comments I've seen about why Sasuke is "objectively" better, I feel like it comes back to a lack of introspection, dare I say toxic masculinity (?), and perhaps just not understanding or relating to Megumi as a character.

I've written before about Megumi's character development and how relating to him has a lot to do with how deeply you can be introspective about yourself. I won't address character development much here, so if you want to, you can read that post here.

But when it comes to Megumi vs. Sasuke, it's almost like comparing apples to oranges. Yes, they're both fruit (quiet and aloof deuteragonist-kun), AND they also have a different flavor profile, different texture, different scent... the list goes on.

And the way I see it, if someone can't see how the differences between Sasuke and Megumi make them fundamentally different despite sharing the same trope, then they can't "objectively" claim one is better than the other.

So I'm going to go ahead and just say it.

I don't like Sasuke. I never did and I never understood why he was so popular.

The comments about Megumi having the depth of a kiddie pool?

I feel the exact same about Sasuke.

I literally can't think of much to say about him other than he was pissy and had a sour attitude the whole time... umm... he wanted revenge and power... ? I guess?

And you know what? It's perfectly ok that I don't like Sasuke because my subjective opinion does not mean that someone who loves Sasuke is wrong about loving him. After all, my opinion should not be a measuring stick for someone who loves Sasuke.

In fact, I have moots who think very highly of Sasuke AND Megumi, and like them for different reasons. So I actually try to refrain from speaking negatively of Sasuke because I respect my moot's opinions and know that perhaps I am not seeing something they can.

That said, when we compare Sasuke and Megumi, we're measuring the characters against standards that don't apply to either of them.

Since Sasuke is on a revenge character arc, you can't really talk about how he explores his sense of self in order to re-define it (which is one of the main reasons I love Megumi). Sasuke wants power, but that just means he has to train harder.

Megumi does go the training route, but in the end, perhaps it was a moment of clarity and introspection that helped him level up, not just the physical training.

Likewise, since Megumi is on an arc meant to re-define his sense of self, you can't really talk about how he went about seeking power to reach his goal because Megumi is not interested in power for the sake of power, and/or does not have grandiose aspirations.

As you say, their motivations couldn't be more different.

Now, I think it bears repeating that when I started watching jjk, even though I liked him right from the beginning, I thought Megumi was underwhelming af given his trope.

But that's only because, again, I was measuring Megumi against the wrong standards.

In retrospect, I also do feel like Gege wanted Megumi to be perceived as "underwhelming given his trope" (MOST ESPECIALLY SASUKE imo), otherwise the payoff in chapter 58 would not have had the same impact.

So anyways.

To your point. Existing at the intersection of these two fandoms must be an interesting experience because most of the bad comparisons are rooted on surface level similarities.

Thing is, being able to see the nuance between the two characters and why neither is objectively better than the other, does require the ability to read below the surface AND to at least have a certain degree of emotional investment in the story and the characters.

Also, can I just say fandom wars are so pointless?

It's just a bunch of people who can't handle the idea that other people could have a different opinion because they see their opinion as the ultimate truth.

And don't let me act like I'm not the kind of pretentious asshat who will say something like "Megumi is a purposeful deconstruction but Aki is a copy" because I can be quite elitist myself. I just also don't take my opinion too seriously because I know I don't own the ultimate truth about what is and isn't good media.

Also I like to indulge in trash tv like every normal human being in this planet so that alone makes my taste questionable.

To that point, I saw a really good quote that is so relevant to your ask:

The price for certainty means that other people must be wrong. And that leads to holy war.

Lionel Corbett

"uwu Megumi is weak"

But... there's something that has been nagging me about why people don't like Megumi in general that is highly related to how his predecessors, Sasuke included, set the bar we use to measure the trope, most specifically in Battle Shonen.

And that's that the way me measure what makes Megumi a good character is based on toxic masculinity values.

Now... I'm not an expert on the topic, so please correct me if I'm wrong or need to expand my perspective here but...

There's something inherently "toxic" about how people are approaching both Megumi independently of Sasuke, and Megumi compared to Sasuke.

Like... if Sasuke wouldn't curl up in a ball because he's had to experience a traumatic event and instead just keeps on going, that's called repression and/or suppression and it's both not a healthy coping mechanism AND not realistically written.

So what if Sasuke would never?

Why is it wrong for a character (or a real human for that matter) to feel so defeated after the trauma they've had to face?

I am more interested in learning why we are so obsessed with looking down on a fictional character for feeling down on himself... like, Momo, are you ok, dude?

Do you ever allow yourself to feel all your feels or do you just berate yourself when you feel down on yourself?

And why are we measuring trauma on a scale of who has it worse just so that we can cancel someone else's trauma?

Actually, the fact that we can sit here and talk about who has it best and who has it worse like it's a competition?

That's gaslighting, and it's toxic af.

But again. The problem is that jjk fans themselves hate on Megumi independently of whether they compare him to Sasuke or not.

And I'm not sure whether kin here just has shitty reading comprehension skills, but...

I'm noticing a trend that has EVERYTHING to do with my female gaze and it's the fact that I kind of don't give a fuck about power scaling.

Like, it's cool. I'm not hating on people who do, you know. I'm just saying I don't care for it. But what I'm trying to say here is that people hate on Megumi for weird reasons...

Like... I don't think Hyena here is reading the same manga if he can't tell that Megumi has had character development, unless what he expects in terms of character development is...

Which is fine too... I loved dbz back in the day.

Who could ever forget Goku looking like he has to poop so bad his hair grows really long?

But like... are we fucking for real? JJK is far too nuanced to limit your experience of the manga to flashy fights and power ups only.

Again, if this is the standard we are using to measure Megumi as a character, no wonder people are disappointed.

So I say let them eat cake.

No shade to all of the people who I screenshotted here, but they're going to have to come up with smarter arguments to back up their subjective opinions about Sasuke's supposed objective superiority and why Megumi sucks.

In all honesty, the fact that Megumi is perceived as weak strikes me as toxic masculinity.

I get that some people read fiction to escape from their daily lives and not have to face the failures and successes they experience in the real world, but I personally want more human characters who fail and cry because that's more relatable to me than Goku's super powered instinct Saiyan form or whatever its called.

I guess we all read for different reasons. All I'm saying is "don't hate on Megumi for shortsighted reasons."

To bring it back to where it all started, let's be real here:

Megumi will NEVER be Sasuke

and that is fantastic news because Megumi is Megumi and that's exactly why we love him.

Dear anon, I think I went on a rant there hahahaha.

BAH! I just get so annoyed when people hate on Megumi for shallow reasons. Like, if you don't like him, you don't like him and that's that. But like some of the comments about him are just...

LOL!

Thank you for stopping by anon!

#fushiguro megumi #god i love jujutsu kaisen #fushiguro megumi lovers unite #ask the mental gymnastics anime girl

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psychewritesbs · 2 years

Text

Megumi, a character trope analysis because I should be adulting

This is in response to @we-are-living-graves:

Thanks for your patience. I vomit too many words for the Tumblr chat function so... you get a whole post to answer your question.

Come be a nerd with me below the cut...

Ah I just did the thing...

I compared Sasuke and Megumi because they share the same trope...

A trope is a literary concept meaning the repetitive use of a word, plot device, theme, image, or figure by an author. (source).

From a literary perspective, I like to think of a trope as a figurative metaphor for something that repeats itself in different media.

Like... Sasuke and Megumi sharing superficial qualities about their characters.

The short answer to your question:

When it comes to Megumi, his temperament is defined by the trope, but his personality is very well-thought out and developed.

What trope?, you ask.

You know... THE trope...

THE trope

I’d say that at least in anime and manga, this character is defined by being quiet and aloof deuteragonist-kun (Aki from Chainsaw Man)...

This character is typically introverted and oftentimes possesses superior and natural talent or intelligence, especially when compared to the protagonist’s lack of talent and more extroverted personality (Kageyama Tobio from Haikyuu!!).

But more importantly, this trope is about a dynamic.

In other words, in this trope the character in question is the yin to the protagonist’s yang or vice versa (Nine and Twelve from Zankyou no Terror)...

Basically, their personalities are contrasted to one another.

As you might have seen, even the dark hair color appears to be a defining trait for this character trope.

But if you take the defining characteristics of the trope (like having black hair and an introverted personality) and create a character that fits this trope so that it is something an audience can easily recognize, but break the character mold by giving him a unique personality... that’s how you bring the character to life...

That’s how the character becomes a distinct sea-urchin head human with a distinct personality.

Because if you don’t break a character mold, well, that’s how you end up with a cliché--a one dimensional character that is strictly defined by the basic characteristics of THE trope (Gray from Fairy Tail)...

The difference between Gray and Megumi + the other characters I mentioned above, is that Gray doesn’t have a distinct multi-dimensional personality. His personality is THE trope: quiet and/or aloof, dark hair, introverted, the whole 9 yards...

Ok, I do have to be honest, I never saw more than one episode of Fairy Tail so I really don’t know much about Gray’s personality other than he seemed like a 1-note character to me.

Compared to the above examples, Grey is not well-developed enough to think of him as a human.

But more importantly, there’s nothing distinct and fresh about Gray because Gray sticks to the trope’s boundaries.

On the contrary...

Aki proves that he can be quite a jerk and its because he’s a hard-worker who is so determined to reach his goal and even becomes the very thing he hated the most

Kageyama is incredibly naturally talented and ambitious, a bit on the anti-social spectrum and needs to learn to work with others while also being true to himself. Also, he sucks in academic matters

Nine is incredibly dry and appears to be unfeeling when in reality he truly cares about the people closest to him. He’s also a wickedly smart mastermind capable of manipulating behavior and other impressive feats

Megumi is... well... Megumi is Megumi

Megumi breaking the mold is in the little details and psychological

I think Gege is approaching characterization through a Psychology lens because he’s really good at expressing personality--the ego self.

So you’ll find that Gege reveals the sense of self that a character has through their behavior, thoughts and what they say just as much as they are defined by their character trope.

So, yes, Megumi is quiet and aloof and cares a lot (like the trope), but have you noticed what moves Megumi’s heart?

And how he shows he cares?

Sometimes he even acts mean and somehow it still manages to show how much he cares...

It may not look like it, but Megumi is a softy.

And even though he is naturally talented and possesses a superior intelligence (just like the trope), have you noticed how much he second guesses himself?...

Compared to what he looks like and how he behaves when he re-defines his sense of self and realizes that he can accomplish more than he thought was possible...

Honestly, I’m having such a hard time explaining this because Megumi is THE trope and yet he breaks the mold by not being defined by it and by being unequivocally... Megumi.

He has a distinct personality and will simultaneously always remind you of that one other character with the same trope (i.e. I’ve heard a name from the HxH manga a lot but am not familiar with the character, is it Kurapika?).

Gege gets it.

Megumi isn’t just introverted, Megumi’s introversion is a metaphor for his Cursed Technique--he hides parts of himself in the shadows.

And the way he crawls out of the shadows when you least expect him to?

It’s kind of nightmarish and I love him all the more for it.

He is also surprisingly nosy and childish...

And at the same time he’s incredibly mature for his age.

Or how in the beginning of the manga, his Divine Dogs can be considered metaphors for his polarized, black and white thinking until White Dog is destroyed and is absorbed by the Black Dog.

Emblem XLVII The Wolf from the East and the Dog from the West savaged each other. (Source)

And how Kon, a synthesis of the two Divine Dogs, appears to channel Megumi’s emotional self.

Not to mention that Kon is an alchemical metaphor for the process of turning Gold into Lead (I may be using the wrong terminology). So on top of everything I’ve shared about Megumi, Kon might say a lot about how his character changes and grows.

Emblem XXIV The Wolf devoured the King and, cremated, restored him to life. (Source)

And like this... there’s so many more examples.

Honestly, I’ve always loved how multi-dimensional Megumi is while still getting a coherent sense of what his character is about.

Maybe what I’m trying to say is that Megumi is both predictable and unpredictable as a character.

What makes him predictable is the trope that defines him.

And what makes him unpredictable are the little details about how Megumi behaves, what he says, how his backstory defines who he is as a person in the present moment, and how he navigates his life as a result of the events that defined his way of interacting with the world.

Anyways, in the end, everything I wrote about Megumi is headcanon. Someone might have a different interpretation of his personality based on how they perceive the world, and yet we’d both agree on one thing...

Megumi is quiet and aloof deuteragonist-kun.

Ah, I really do hope that made sense! And thanks for your patience while I got around to answering your question.

I also wasn’t sure of how much you know about literary tropes so I went ahead and included the bit about that anyways.

#fushiguro megumi #ask the mental gymnastics anime girl #god I love jujutsu kaisen #fushiguro megumi lovers unite

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psychewritesbs · 1 year

Note

HI ! another anon here, unfortunately I saw many (or not many but very vocal) express joy at the possibility of Megumi being completely erased by Sukuna. And I don't know if I'm simply in denial but I refuse to believe that this is the ending that Gege would give his deuteragonist, and leaving pending points like? not even a closure like he has even given to side characters? Megumi is my fav, I know there is a possibility that he dies, but not like this, not now. u still have positivity? :')

HOLA dearest Another Anon,

I mean... what can I say. I was, quite literally, boasting about wanting to see Megumi suffer like the massive idiot that I am. I even busted out with the tacky Mexican telenovela villainess laughter.

Seriously, I am insufferable...

... And then I saw what Gege did... it broke my heart because I wasn’t expecting it to be so damn cruel. Gege. is. a. fucking. sadist. Just you wait you damn cursed cat, I’m coming for you just so that I can ask you how poetic it is to have “Victoria” carved on your forehead. I'll be your Goddess of Victory alright.

That said, I can see why someone would be overjoyed at seeing Sukuna overpower and obliterate Megumi’s consciousness. Either they don’t care about Megumi or they are excited by the implications.

But for us Megumi-lovers... I totally get it. Not only is it hard to ignore that Gege has killed off or “put in the corner” so many important/major characters already, but if “Megumi” is gone and only his body remains with a different consciousness within it... well, even if he looks like it, he’s not really Megumi any longer, is he?

And honestly, this whole experience made me realize that, as much as I love JJK in general, I’m here for Megumi and Megumi’s growth as a character.

Anyways. Yeah. I am cautiously optimistic under the cut for several reasons, but mostly because Gege gives meaning...

I am cautiously optimistic

Cautiously optimistic because as much as my brain can’t help itself, I don’t want to try to predict JJK anymore. I think some of my headcanons have come to pass in a different expression of what I had in mind. But that’s the thing with “Archetypes”, Archetypes are an empty shell until they are given meaning.

So at this point I just want to enjoy what’s left of this roller coaster ride. Read this to mean that I’ll probably won’t be able to help myself and will continue trying to guess how things progress.

JJK is beautifully unpredictable even with all of the foreshadowing that Gege dropped along the way.

I’m also cautiously optimistic because Gege has shown us at least a couple of times that the original body’s consciousness can still awaken and take over.

Finally, I am cautiously optimistic because the kanji in Megumi’s name can be said to symbolize a light in the darkest of shadows. A blessing in a cursed world.

After all, does light not shine brightest in the darkness?

I personally HOPE that this poetic justice comes back into play later on. The power of names is a trope after all.

There’s also thoughts that have been shared with me by others...

Like ma 🍒, who keeps reminding me that we don’t know how this is going to play out yet and that there’s details we can keep in mind that might mean that this isn’t the end for Megumi.

I think moving forward you might also start hearing more evidence about why this is just temporary because, as has been largely theorized, Sukuna just needs Megumi’s cursed technique to make him a new body.

Another thing to keep in mind is that...

Gege is good at manipulating emotions

Like... reeeeeal good.

Just look at the current state of the Megumi fandom or how any time Nobara is mentioned the fandom goes into an uproar.

This is a culmination point and it has been beautifully executed in the sense that it’s got you and me and millions of other people lamenting whether this is “it” for Megumi.

So the way events flowed could all very well have been crafted for the sake of emotional impact.

But we simply won’t know for some time.

This is a call to trust the process. We have no choice but to let the cat cook.

If this is, indeed, temporary, then we will get our closure.

If this is “it”, however... well...

I have to say there’s something larger at play here, and that is “the kind of story Gege is writing” and “the kind of writer Gege is”.

So keep in mind that...

Gege is an existentialist

To your point about how unsatisfying Megumi’s death would feel if this is “it”... yeah. Totally.

So that should tell you that you have to think of Gege as either an existentialist or a nihilist mangaka.

Since I’m not sure whether you understand what these concepts mean, what I’ll say is that life is what you make of it. It’s up to you to decide whether life is inherently meaningless and chaotic, or whether there is meaning and order to the chaos that is life.

An existentialist author is someone who writes about characters navigating the meaninglessness of the chaos that is life, and who seek to give meaning and purpose to said chaos.

On the other end of the spectrum you have nihilism--the belief that life is meaningless.

SO... if Gege was feeling pretty nihilistic on the day he came up with Megumi’s death and the JJK ending, then we can expect that Megumi’s death is indeed anticlimactic like a certain someone’s death...

Not sure if you read my response to Recurring Anon about JJK’s writing in which I confess that I am not a fan of Chainsaw Man’s brand of existentialism because it feels a bit too much on the “navel gazing” end of the existential spectrum, and anti-climatic to boot because it’s nihilistic at the core.

Similarly, CLAMP’s writing is also existential, anti-climatic, and can err on the nihilist end of the spectrum too. i.e. I understand that the art style and overall lack of screen tones in xxxHolic is meant to reflect and evoke a sense of vacancy and emptiness because that is how the mc experiences the world. Something like that.

My other beloved existentialist is Shinichiro Watanabe who will shred your heart to bits and pieces with inconclusive but optimistic existential angst.

Bang. See you space cowboy.

You can watch a Watanabe ending and walk away both heartbroken and inspired. The man is a genius.

I bring up all of these examples because you can more or less organize these authors into neat little boxes.

If I had to compare mangaka, I’d say Fujimoto and CLAMP are nihilists, whereas Gege is more like Watanabe, an existentialist who chooses to give meaning. That’s why Gege’s character’s deaths have always felt very poetic despite how brutal they can be--there’s meaning to them.

Megumi’s “death” in the larger JJK-scheme of things, with the rather limited information we have right now, feels nihilistic af.

So let’s assume for a minute that he doesn’t come back... like yeah, I’m in denial and cautiously optimistic, but we have to prepare for the worst because Gege is unpredictable af and I wouldn’t put it past him to have killed Megumi because that’s how he rolls. SO...

If Megumi doesn’t come back, what meaning will Gege give to Megumi’s death?

How will the events that follow create meaning around Megumi’s death?

I think what worries me right now is that Megumi has a bit of a nihilistic view of life. And if Gege is the kind of author who lets the characters write themselves because he wants his characters to be true to their nature, then... this death is fitting. It’s just as meaningless as Megumi believes the world to be.

Makes sense, right?

Honestly, existentialism is hard to explain, so hopefully this makes sense. But right now any mental gymnastics I do to delude myself that Megumi is getting out alive all hinge on Gege being a tortured existentialist who seeks to give meaning.

After all, as a piece of literature, JJK is underscored with a sense of poetic justice that is everything but devoid of meaning.

So basically yeah... This is the tiny bit of positivity I was able to share with you? :') Hopefully it helps!

idk what kind of ending we’ll get. I am picturing something very meta from Gege but don’t ask me to elaborate. I just feel like something very spiritual and big is coming.

But I do hope we get a Watanabe type ending from Gege...

Because the truth is... I don’t believe in happy endings. I believe in Watanabe endings because Watanabe endings capture the existential dread at the core of life simply moving on, with or without you.

And if the ending turns out to be super meaningless and nihilistic, know that there’s only 5k miles between Los Angeles and Tokyo and if we start swimming now we might arrive by the time JJK ends.

Thanks for stopping by!!!

#ask the mental gymnastics anime girl #this got existential real quick #god I love jujutsu kaisen #fushiguro megumi lovers unite

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psychewritesbs · 1 year

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hola chicaa! after seeing some people say 'Megumi has no development' on rddit (yeah that hell) and I disagree btw, I decided to ask you (I love reading your mental gymnastics), when a character has development according to you? because apparently people have different ideas about development or they're just Megumi-haters. Also if you want to talk about Megumi's development, my brain is ready for gymnastics lol

HOLA chico(a)!!!

“Megumi has no development”.

This is how Megumi feels about that statement:

But..... I do have to be honest and confess that I used to think Megumi was an underwhelming character early on in the anime.

GASP! THE NERVE! Ok but let me explain myself...

Onto the Megumi Mental Gymnastics below the cut!

This ramble is split into 3 parts:

Reasons why I think people completely miss Megumi’s development

What the hell is character development anyways?

A look at Megumi’s character development thus far

Feel free to skip around if needed.

Ok, warm up is done. Onto the proper Mental Gymnastics.

Megumi-haters, lack of self awareness, or underwhelming character by design? That is the question...

“Megumi has no development”.

I have to start by saying that I think that this kind of comment about Megumi comes back to a few things.

1. Not bonding with Megumi as a character is probably the biggest culprit here.

It’s comparable to me not being able to say much about characters like Gojo, Geto or Nanami other than surface-level details. I simply have not brain rotted enough about them or have formed an emotional attachment to the characters.

Which inevitably brings up the issue of self-insertion (which some people hate with a passion for some reason) and projection--assigning qualities to a character that are the product of your own psychological life.

2. Psychologically-speaking, we’re only able to perceive a character’s depth inasmuch as we can meet our own depth.

So I think this is an important distinction to make because even if I didn’t bond with Geto or Nanami, I can still make more or less solid assessments about their characters from re-reading the manga with a focus on their perspective.

But if I lack self-awareness, the ability to understand my motivations, personality, and growth (just to name a few facets of self awareness that can be related to a fictional character), then I can’t really see these facets in others.

It’s also important to make a distinction here between surface-level motivations (I want to drive a Mercedes Benz) and the deeper and largely unconscious motivations that drive us (I want others to see how valuable I am).

So, I imagine that people who think Megumi doesn’t have development have both missed out on it because they have not emotionally bonded with him as a character, and because they lack the self-awareness to understand how Megumi “develops” as a character.

3. Gege’s writing style is nuanced and leaves a lot up for interpretation

That’s it. No explanation needed. Let’s just say Gege doesn’t spoon feed the audience when it comes to certain matters. Rather, he gives enough information for the audience to come up with their own conclusions.

But that also means that if you are used to being spoon fed information, you might miss out on the subtext.

But more importantly...

4. What if early on in the manga Gege wanted us to think that Megumi was an underwhelming character without development?

Which is kind of how I too fell for how underwhelming he was. ESPECIALLY considering that his trope, Quiet and Aloof Deuteragonist-kun, is typically the more naturally talented character compared to the MCs lack of natural talent.

I know I am committing a cardinal sin here, but if you’ve seen Naruto, think of how Sasuke is naturally talented compared to Naruto.

But beyond that, Sasuke was always perceived as a formidable opponent in battle. Even when he went against opponents that were more powerful than he was (like Orochimaru or Gaara), as an audience, you never got the sense that Sasuke was weak or underwhelming. Rather, as an audience, you were likely to think that the gap in difference in power would be closed once Sasuke got stronger.

But that’s not the case with Megumi.

Just as the trope dictates, like Sasuke, Megumi is introduced as someone who has superior power and intelligence.

But what we see in the story prior to Chimera Shadow Garden is actually in direct opposition of the trope--if he is so powerful and naturally talented, then why did everybody and their Jujutsu-mom kick his ass?

We know Megumi gets pitted against opponents who are stronger than him and that because of it he has no chance of winning, but the way Megumi handles himself makes him look "boring” and “underwhelming” compared to other characters true to the trope, and even characters within JJK.

So I think it’s only natural for the audience to think that Megumi is weak or boring because, compared to other characters true to the trope (not just Sasuke, but Haikyuu’s Kageyama, Dragon Ball Z’s Vegeta, etc), he truly was underwhelming. This is especially poignant if you’re familiar with how his trope is typically executed in Shonen manga (I think Chainsaw Man’s Aki is very similar to Megumi in this sense).

What the audience doesn’t know for a whole 60something chapters/23 episodes is that Megumi’s apparent lackluster abilities were actually the result of a mindset limited by his own sense of self. In other words, Gege subverted Megumi’s trope.

So when chapter 23 of the anime rolled around and exposed both what he’s capable of and his backstory, not only did it feel like a massive payoff, in retrospect it also made so much sense why he kept loosing:

Megumi plays small, self sabotages, and doesn’t know how to bring out his “best” because he’s limited by his sense of self.

And when he does bring out his “best”, Megumi isn’t your average Sasuke, Kageyama or Vegeta. Megumi is a freak.

I was am hooked.

This is not to mention that his backstory also explains why Megumi is the way he is and thinks the way he is. I went on a crazy limb elaborating on how his childhood might have shaped his thinking in a previous ask.

So if you’ve been watching Megumi closely, once you see what he’s capable of, not to mention that it looks like he himself doesn’t know what he’s capable of, and then you notice that the King of Curses and The Strongest acknowledge him...

Well... It’s kind of hard not to see that Megumi is over-powered and doesn’t even realize it.

This speculation should also tell you that it is possible that Megumi’s character arc is likely going to be about how he gets out of his own way and develops an overwhelming sense of self so that he can bring out said overwhelming power.

Which basically means that he must... you know... develop.

Character development defined

Ok, according to Masterclass,

In literature, character development is the craft of giving a character a personality, depth, and motivations that propel them through a story. Character development is also defined as how a character evolves throughout the course of a story.

Because JJK is Psychological in nature, I am going to go ahead and also add that character development includes the evolution of their sense of self and mindset (both of which are intricately entangled).

This is especially poignant for a story like JJK where the strongest characters have an overwhelming sense of self.

In other words, the strongest characters know themselves so well that they can transcend and redefine their own mindset.

I’m still looking for a better way to explain this because it is a complex subject, so bear with me in the meantime.

The thing is that a character doen’t just wake up one morning and realize that it went from point A (lack of self knowledge) to point B (overwhelming sense of self).

Rather, just like in real life, fictional characters experience conflict in their life that helps them grow and develop.

And it is this process of navigating the conflict in their life that shapes the character’s thinking. More importantly, just like it happens to you and me in the real world, this process of self-development is also a process in which a character gets to know themselves and their own thinking, as well as becoming aware of their thinking about their thinking.

This got meta real quick...

The point is that part of development, Megumi’s development to be more specific, involves his ability to think critically about his sense of self--the thoughts he has about the thoughts he has about himself and what his sense of self dictates he can accomplish.

Psychology.

IS ANY OF THIS MAKING ANY SENSE AT ALL?!!!!

Again, remember, I can only perceive a character’s depth inasmuch as I can perceive it in myself.

So aaaaaaall this to say that anyone who thinks Megumi doesn’t have development has probably not been reading the manga focused on him, and/or simply does not have the psychological capacity to see Megumi’s growth because they have not had an experience of growth like Megumi’s.

Also, yes, growth and development are interchangeable.

Megumi is OP and he doesn’t even realize it

Back to this idea of Megumi’s possible character arc: Megumi learns to get out of his own way and develops an overwhelming sense of self so that he can bring out said overwhelming power.

Just based on that premise alone, it’s impossible to separate Megumi from development.

Megumi didn’t just wake up one morning and went from...

To...

In fact, everything that happens between both points in Megumi’s character arc helps him grow and develop.

He had to first realize that his imagination and sense of self was limiting how he used his Cursed Technique...

He had to realize that he had fallen behind and had to rethink his sense of self if he wanted to get stronger...

He had to be called out on his propensity to play small...

And not just by Gojo...

But Megumi’s development as a character can also be seen outside of his power as a sorcerer and in how he’s opened up to the people around him.

And how he’s come to learn to value his own life and abilities...

And all of these examples are mostly from Pre-Shibuya events and don’t even include how he caught new Pokémon mastered Rabbit Escape, held his own ground against Dagon (a Special Grade Cursed Spirit) in a battle of Domain Expansions, and unleashed Mahoraga as a big, massive “fuck you” to that kid who stabbed him.

This also doesn’t even include how he’s grown in confidence in his abilities since he began exploring the limits of his imagination about what is possible for him.

Not to mention the humility required to understand his limitations and that he needs to and can rely more on others.

I won’t get into it in detail here but Megumi is a metaphor for how personal growth and development is the result of re-integrating the psychic material hidden away in the shadow--shadow work is the process of bringing into the light of consciousness the unconscious psychic material defining your life experience.

In turn, this shadow work is what allows Megumi to transform the way he thinks about himself (his sense of self) and how doing so unleashes powers that he did not know he could bring forth.

So...

Basically...

You can’t separate Megumi from development because Megumi IS a character study on quantum (?) Psychological development.

Why quantum? Because Megumi has grown by leaps and bounds in a way that you can only accomplish when you are highly conscious of your self.

In other words, in a story about how the strongest characters are the ones with the strongest sense of self, Megumi is well on his way to joining the ranks of Sukuna and Gojo and doesn’t even know it.

Anyways, hopefully I was able to illustrate Megumi’s development “that he doesn't have”.

Again, Gege’s writing style is very nuanced and leaves A LOT up for interpretation so you kind of only see these things in retrospect.

I also want to say that, looking back, Megumi’s underwhelming performance earlier on in the manga is so damn human and so damn relatable. And it is the fact that he came across as an underwhelming character early on in the story that makes it feel all the more exciting to see him grow in confidence.

But listen. GRACIAS for inviting me to brain rot about Megumi!

And gracias for joining me in the Mental Gymnastics, it took me a while to respond to your ask but I do hope you got a good stretch. Last but not least, gracias as well for the kind words ♥.

Happy non-JJK-Sunday!

#ask the mental gymnastics anime girl #fushiguro megumi lovers unite

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psychewritesbs · 1 year

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I wonder how much about being a jujutsu sorcerer megumi had to juggle on his own while having a sister who doesn't seem to be as involved and having gojo as a "mentor" (I use that very loosely lol) I mostly mean this for megumi's mental and emotional state. I don't think he actually talked about how rough being a sorcerer is and just moved forward by building a very personal set of morals. He thinks so lowly of himself in terms of ability, so it makes me think he had a hard time adjusting to the idea that he would one day have to become a sorcerer that could actually make a difference or maybe knowing he was going to be sold influenced this thinking too. I always thought it was sad how a child had to choose becoming a sorcerer in exchange to receive funds for he and sister and offset being sold to the zenins. This may sound like I'm trying to make him seem more tragic, but I imagine he and tsumiki had pretty harsh lives despite not living dirt poor anymore. I just want to pick at his brain to be more honest so this is just a huge word vomit with some level of coherent thought but idk anymore

Just let me inside his head gege please !

HOLA! Thank you sooo much for sharing your Megumi brain rot! This is amazing aaaand it was indeed coherent.

So many details to unpack for conversation’s sake...

THE MEGUMI BRAINROT BELOW THE CUT:

“I don't think he actually talked about how rough being a sorcerer is and just moved forward by building a very personal set of morals”:

Oh I love this so much!

Megumi’s morality is something very interesting to me. And the way you’ve framed the whole thing makes so much sense.

“A very personal set of morals” is defo something that characterizes him.

I personally see Megumi’s moral compass as very self-serving. What I love about it is that he saves people unequally, and I get the feeling its because he gets emotionally attached to people and is unwilling/unable to let them go.

“He thinks so lowly of himself in terms of ability, so it makes me think he had a hard time adjusting to the idea that he would one day have to become a sorcerer that could actually make a difference”:

Personally, this is one of the things I find so relatable about him.

Megumi has massive impostor syndrome and even though he’s so naturally talented (Grade 2 Sorcerer at 15), and even though everyone and their Jujutsu-mom acknowledges and speaks highly of his skill and ability, Megumi is the only one who can't see it. All he can see is “I’ve got this trump card that I can use to win, I’ll die, but at least I’ll win.”

The thing about impostor syndrome is that it is insidious. God, it’s awful to be so naturally talented at something that you don’t even know you’re talented. Spoken from personal experience, when you have impostor syndrome you have this mentality that everyone can do what you’re uniquely capable of doing, that your abilities are not in any way, shape or form special.

So Impostor Syndrome kind of makes you second-guess yourself, it colors your perception of what is possible for you because you don’t know what you don’t know--in Megumi’s case, even knowing that one of the Zenin ancestors took down an ancestor for the Gojo clan must have been a big surprise.

I’ll talk more about how Megumi’s mindset could be the result of his history of childhood trauma and neglect later.

And that’s why, in all honesty, seeing his arc unravel is one of my favorite #things ever.

If you’ve been reading my Megumi brain-rots, then you already know that seeing Megumi become someone who challenged his own sense of self is something I love. But above all, I love how along the way he also learned to value himself and his life.

Not sure how much canon truth there is to this idea, but the way I interpret this change in him is that I feel like when Megumi realized he could accomplish more than he thought was possible, he gained the confidence to value himself and his abilities so that he could fulfill his desire to protect “good people”. After all, he can’t protect “good people” if he’s dead.

It’s almost like part of his arc has been about him learning to be comfortable with using his very unique abilities to, as you say, “actually make a difference” as a sorcerer.

So I totally love what you’ve said about how his old sense of self was uncomfortable with the idea of being a hero, someone who “actually makes a difference”. After all, in his mind, how can he make a difference if he doesn’t see the value that he can bring to the table?

We already know Megumi plays small and self-sabotages since he thinks so low of his ability. It’s also like on a subconscious level he can’t handle the pressure of having to “become a sorcerer that could actually make a difference.”

Again, Megumi is so gifted. He’s literally blessed with the family jewel (the 10 Shadows Cursed Technique), but he’s literally limited only by his sense of self. It takes him a whole 60something chapters to realize he can and should make a difference.

Ah, not sure how much of this is head canon but, as you say in your ask: Just let me inside his head gege please !

“Maybe knowing he was going to be sold influenced this thinking too...”

Yeah, totally.

Psychologically-speaking, a child of the same age when Megumi was abandoned tends to internalize what happens to them as it being their fault.

Imagine mom abandoned you, so did dad, and now even the other woman who was supposed to take care of you left too. It is likely for a child to internalize this abandonment as something that happened to them because they are not lovable or lovable enough.

To go back to the idea of how his childhood trauma affected him, the way Megumi is written is that his sense of self reflects the unconscious limiting belief that he is not “worth much” as a person.

And come to think of it, it makes me wonder whether Megumi’s resentment towards Toji comes from him being resentful of how he felt unimportant and unlovable enough for his own father to stick around.

When Gojo shows up at his door, Megumi also demonstrated that he had an understanding of how money works, so by learning he had been sold to the Zenin clan, Megumi probably internalized the idea that he’s a burden to others that isn’t “worth much”.

Boy, little does he know.

The point is that when you grow up with a limiting belief revolving around your sense of self worth, it typically translates into the kind of behavior that Megumi exhibits--that undervaluing of himself which translates into how he plays small, won’t ask for help from others, and is so easily able to throw away his life because he thinks the best he can do when in a pinch is to summon this monster he thinks he can’t control just because no one before him has been to do it.

Megumi is also a character who had to “grow up” too soon to be able to navigate a world he was not psychoemotionally prepared to deal with. I mean... he was 6? 7? Gege messed up on the timeline, but it’s safe to say Megumi was a school-aged child at the time he was abandoned by Tsumiki’s mother.

When you’re a school aged child, parental figures are supposed to provide the best possible conditions for a child to thrive in so that they can have what is considered proper psychoemotional development. If you think about it, Megumi didn’t have that opportunity to be a child.

And I have to say there’s something so beautiful about Megumi’s childish innocence when it comes to having to make the choice to become a sorcerer to protect Tsumiki.

It’s almost like, despite having to grow up too soon, his child-like innocence comes through in how confident he is in taking on the burden to become a sorcerer because of what it will mean.

Almost like he had this unfounded over-confidence that he could take on the world if it came down to it...

“...This may sound like I'm trying to make him seem more tragic...”

Not at all.

I wouldn’t say you’re making it seem more tragic than it is at all. Quite the opposite, I’d say Megumi’s backstory is meant to be tragic af. You’re spot on thinking about how sad his circumstances as a child were and how these circumstances affected and shaped his mindset as a person.

And in my opinion, what elevates the tragedy even more, is the idea that (I headcanon) Megumi is resentful and feels hurt about being abandoned by his father, but is unaware that he was actually beloved--probably even considered a blessing to the ones who named him.

If you think about it, Megumi’s circumstances are the result of a cruel and tragic fate--events and circumstances outside of his control.

Despite his gender, he was given the name that represents the concept for “blessing” even though it is a kanji normally used for female names--so I like to assume that he was the much expected and much beloved child to a couple that might have been very much in love. ✓ fate.

Mom got sick and died? ✓ fate.

Dad (who is also known as someone who broke fate) being at the right place at the right time, which ultimately led to his death? ✓ fate.

Gojo being at the right place at the right time to learn about Toji’s kid, the kid who inherited the Zenin clan’s most prized Cursed Technique? ✓ fate.

While we don’t know what happened to Tsumiki’s mom, I’m going to go ahead and chalk off her disappearance to ✓ fate since it was outside of Megumi’s ability to exercise his free will.

Aaaaaall that to say that I had honestly not thought about it, but I have to say I totally agree that Megumi probably didn’t have the most idyllic childhood even after Gojo took him in.

Megumi basically grew up knowing he was indebted to someone else (✓ fate). I want to think that one of the reasons why he grew up to be such a cranky teenager who was always getting into trouble was precisely because fighting was how Megumi could exercise his free will in a world where the odds had been staked against him.

But, more importantly, in my opinion, one of Megumi’s themes as a character is overcoming fate--especially your self-fulfilling prophesies.

What I love about how Gege wrote Megumi is that Megumi isn’t defined by the tragedy of his life.

Megumi isn’t on a revenge plot to get back at anyone, he doesn’t go around moping and bemoaning his fate (like Charlie Bernard from the Culling Game does), and his motivations are not grandiose--he just has a duty to fulfill because he basically sold himself for future labor so that he could protect Tsumiki.

In my Professional Anime Psychology Nerd opinion, I have to say Megumi’s character is so well-written. I also see him as a character-study on how unconscious trauma affects, directs and defines mindset in ways we are unable to understand because we take our reality for granted.

In a nutshell, emotional trauma distorts and shapes our sense of self.

Bringing to consciousness the unconscious stories tangled up in the emotional trauma we’ve experienced is the work of a lifetime--individuation.

At the risk of sounding like a broken record... this is what captivates me so much about Megumi.

The fact that Megumi broke through his own mental barriers in such a dramatic way is something I aspire to do for myself.

He inspires me.

So there you go.

Megumi word vomit lol.

Ok but listen. I LOVE brain rotting about Megumi and I totally just went on a ramble--I hope I was able to sort of have a conversation about him as I do tend to go on tangents. Thank you for reading lol.

But in all honesty, above all, thank you for sharing your thoughts. I love sharing my love for anime with others so I am grateful you stopped by to share the Megumi love.

Same for anyone who reads the #Weekly Mental Gymnastics.

Much Megumi-love!

#fushiguro megumi lovers unite #ask the mental gymnastics anime girl

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psychewritesbs · 1 year

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from one Megumi enthusiast to another: I can't find the will to continue reading the manga weekly, maybe I'll catch up again by the end. I thought my interest in the story was enough to keep me interested even if my fav was absent but it seems I was wrong. How could I continue reading and watching other characters develop and grow while my fav's growth is on hold because he's suppressed by one of the villains and I'll probably only hear from him again in the final battle? assuming Gege still has plans for him by the way. I mean, I was staying pretty positive and hopeful but after chapter 221 I'm extremely frustrated... and I also feel ridiculous lol because what did I expect? that Megumi manages to "get rid of Sukuna somehow" before the final battle? Maybe not, I think I was just focused on whether Megumi is still there or not and I didn't think about the path until the end 😩

How do you feel about the path the story took? I know you had other expectations for Megumi's growth.

オス。Thanks for stopping by fellow Megumi-lover!

Now that I've been snooping around jjktwt a lot more, one of the things I keep seeing is that binge reading the Culling Game arc is such a different experience from the weekly reading experience. So if you feel like you need to stop reading, you gotta do what you gotta do.

Actually, there's a couple of mangas that I love but I cannot read them unless I binge them.

But I totally hear you about Megumi 🥲. I honestly always miss him when he's not around.

More Megumi love word vomit under the cut...

"Assuming Gege still has plans for him by the way" is so on point btw. Gege is defo breaking all expectations with Megumi so you just never know with him. I still want to believe this isn't it for him, but I like to keep my optimism in check because I don't want my expectations to get the better of me.

But I am praying Gege pulls Megumi's super powered most Jungian character ever card and is able to overwhelm Sukuna with his own sense of self. Somehow, at some point. Pretty please?

That's always been how Megumi rolls.

If I'm honest I have felt so heartbroken for Megumi.

Precisely because I expected him to continue to choose for himself what he fought for and why. But with Sukuna in the mix, Megumi has more or less regressed to early JJK sense of self and even beyond that.

And there's something so relatable about that too. So I literally have a new depth of love that I feel for him as a character.

That is not to mention that the whole idea of his body becoming a weapon to be used against his loved ones must be devastating for him. And it makes me so sad that he's feeling so helpless when in reality it is his mentality that has always held him back.

I mean... both Gojo and Sukuna acknowledge his potential...

Tu put it another way.

Megumi is Megumi's worse enemy.

It all comes back to his sense of self and how he sees himself.

If Megumi does come back by suppressing Sukuna, then what does that mean for how Megumi sees himself?

If he doesn't ever come back, there's meaning in that too.

Personally, at this point in the story, I just want Megumi back. I can cook crazy-person theories all day long, but in the end I just want to see Megumi fight for his life.

LE SIGH ANON! LE SIGH!

What about you? Do tell me more about Megumi if you're up for it.

Thanks for stopping by and sharing the Megumi love.

#ask the mental gymnastics anime girl #god I love jujutsu kaisen #fushiguro megumi lovers unite

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psychewritesbs · 1 year

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Before megumi's other shikigami are revealed, what kind of shikigami do you personally would like to see him have?

Hola.

I would like to see a homunculi type character. Idk, something really creepy and sinister to channel Megumi’s sinister vibes.

I gotta say I love that he has to do the hand signs so that defo has to be a prerequisite.

Everyone and their Jujutsu mom does Buddhist hand signs to activate their power but Megumi does little animals, it’s amazing, I love it.

Which made me wonder what a Pomeranian might look as one of Megumi’s shikigami.

Do you know how feisty little dogs are? I recon fluffy over here would put Kon right into place in a heartbeat.

Ok but in all seriousness, I’m still waiting to see how Gege executes the idea of the Jungian Shadow and what Megumi can pull out of it into this world.

I wouldn’t mind seeing curses come through into the world.

Or I wonder if we’re going to see a bull/ox and if there’s any connection there between Sukuna’s Oxen skull throne and Megumi manifesting a bull/ox Shikigami.

Why an Ox? To answer your ask I went and looked at shadow puppet animals and I thought the Ox (and the horse or leopard) would be much cooler than the goose and the llama lol.

What about you?! Got any thoughts?

What about a squirrel? But like not cute squirrel but you think it’s all innocent and it squirrels away and you don’t even notice until it’s biting you?

#fushiguro megumi lovers unite #ask the mental gymnastics anime girl

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psychewritesbs · 1 year

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hi!! i really love your blog, i love reading your posts, your analysis... after the most recent chapters, couldn't help but wonder how you would be feeling about megumi's fate. his character has also intrigued me so much, i find the implications of his paths and of his world view so interesting - even though i strongly disagree with most of it today, i really identify my past self with him, and sometimes also my present self - he makes me think and feel so much about life, my life, my relationships, identity, choices, traumas etc.... it's been rough with the last chapters.. anyway, i know the possibilities are not exactly on our side, regarding his fate/ending, but i can't help but wonder how fulfilling it would feel like to see more development from him. yes, a lot of development was made, but he has repeated some fateful mistakes, and i think, if he didn't die, that we would be yet to see him build for himself a new philosophy, a new fundamental understanding of the world and his place in all of it, making different choices and taking different paths. i also know a lot of characters don't get this chance (or don't take this chance) before ......dying, but this time, i would really like to see him changing and growing, learning even more from his mistakes.. what do you think about this? is there anything in particular you would like to see about his character development? if you have the time, i would love to hear your thoughts about it! really sorry for making this ask so long though!!! xx

HOLA!

So... first, thank you for sending Megumi love ♥, I love it when people share with me why they love the characters they love, ESPECIALLY if it's about Megumi.

Second, your ask gives me life in so many ways. Thank you for the kind words and taking the time to reach out.

So let's see... "how are you feeling about Megumi's fate?" you ask.

This is what I'll say above the cut.

I really hope there will be a moment of "poetic justice" that underscores and gives meaning to what happened to Megumi. I don't know that, of course, but I feel like it's consistent with how Gege writes... even if he flops the ending.

More word vomit under the cut...

After all... there's meaning in everything but if only we choose to create it in the face of the existential dread that is the chaos of the human experience.

After keeping up with this manga for the better part of nearly three years, I've fallen in love with Gege's writing style for several reasons.

The main reason is that JJK is very dark and gritty but not for the sake of dark and gritty per se. Rather, JJK is dark and gritty for the sake of characters exploring and giving meaning to the existential dread that comes from the circumstances of the world Gege has created.

So... to me... this alone tells me that even if Megumi were to die and even if the execution is lackluster (think chapter 208), it won't feel like an inconclusive ending once it's all been said and done.

Megumi isn't Aki after all, and Gege isn't Fujimoto.

As you say, "i know the possibilities are not exactly on our side, regarding his fate/ending" and what I'll say is that it's not that I don't trust that Megumi can do amazing #things like getting back control of his body. It's the cursed cat that I don't trust because he will kill any character off if the themes he is trying to depict call for it in the plot.

There IS good reason to think that, thematically, Megumi is getting out alive (for the sake of meaning-making) AND I STILL DON'T TRUST THE CAT AFTER WHAT HE DID IN CHAPTER 212!

Also...

Oops, I did it again, I typed a whole response to your ask, and then the chapter 214 leaks started dropping and I had to go back and delete what I had written.

So if you haven't seen the leaks/spoilers for chapter 214 you might want to wait until Sunday to read the rest of my response.

The thing is... I also wasn't sure how Jungian I wanted to get in my response to you.

So after much debate I decided to get Jungian af... After all, you bared your own soul to me. Why shouldn't I do the same? So... there will be personal rambling lol.

BASICALLY this is how I'm excusing myself for always taking forever to answer asks lol. In the end, I just want to give thoughtful and insight provoking answers if at all possible.

So thanks for your patience. You were never for a moment forgotten.

Anyways... as I like to say: without further ado...

You see, I have this condition...

You see, I have this condition... and I feel like you can relate.

But this condition--I call it character myopia, its main symptom is that when I love a character with my entire sense of self, I can't tell where a character begins and where I end.

his character has also intrigued me so much, i find the implications of his paths and of his world view so interesting - even though i strongly disagree with most of it today, i really identify my past self with him, and sometimes also my present self - he makes me think and feel so much about life, my life, my relationships, identity, choices, traumas etc

Everything you've said about how you relate to him, from his life, to his relationships, identity choices and traumas... yes. Thank you for sharing your Megumi love with me.

Honestly, since we're having this convo. idk about you, but it's not often that I love a character to the point of seeing myself in them.

I don't know that there is a whole lot more that I can add to this. I just love what you said so much.

This has got to be one of my favorite parts about experiencing works of fiction and deeply resonating with certain characters.

Fiction can be such a transformative experience and Megumi has been just that for me and it seems for you as well. I love that in Megumi, Gege has created a character that is a container for exploring ourselves creatively.

I agree with the sentiment of identifying with him.

I think for me, right now... I am going through a phase in my life where, like Megumi, I keep bumping my head up against my own self-inflicted limitations.

In addition, in Megumi I have found a reflection of my own darker instincts.

I don't know how to explain what Megumi has done to my psyche. Literally... it's like he's working behind the scenes in transforming how I see the world.

I've literally had dreams with Megumi in them that also include black and white dog symbolism. In retrospect, the dreams have felt archetypal, like a reflection of psychic processes I am unaware of that are working underneath the surface and transforming my consciousness.

With Megumi getting possessed came a new dream with clear satanic symbolism that I thought was really interesting. More specifically because I wasn't scared to face what I saw in myself.

i can't help but wonder how fulfilling it would feel like to see more development from him. yes, a lot of development was made, but he has repeated some fateful mistakes, and i think, if he didn't die, that we would be yet to see him build for himself a new philosophy, a new fundamental understanding of the world and his place in all of it, making different choices and taking different paths

Yes 🥺🙏🏼! This. All of this.

You made me realize I want to see him believe in himself again. When Megumi believes in himself, literal magic happens.

And going back to what is happening at the end of chapter 214, I cannot wait to see Megumi wreck Sukuna from the inside.

There's so much happening for Megumi right now, and he's told the audience before that he will do whatever it takes to protect the people he holds in high esteem.

That's my boy!!!!!!!!!!

So to your point... I love that he will not go down without putting up a fight as he re-negotiates this new philosophy about himself.

YES!

Again, it's not that I don't trust that Megumi has what it takes, it's the cat I don't trust!!!!

i would really like to see him changing and growing, learning even more from his mistakes.. what do you think about this? is there anything in particular you would like to see about his character development?

Yeah, for sure. This is a bit of a loaded question because there's so much about Megumi that still needs to unfold in terms of how he relates to the world around him.

I personally love how Gege has gone out of his way to show how immature Megumi is compared to other characters who share the same trope. Megumi is a flawed human after all.

And aren't we all?

In the end, Megumi has to grow in many different aspects like...

How he relates to his own power.

The limits of his own sense of self and how he uses his imagination to overcome how his sense of self can become unnecessarily bound by reason.

The much needed growth he needs to achieve in how he relates to others (more specifically Tsumiki and how that is a metaphor for how he relates to his own emotional world).

Bridging opposites together (good and evil).

Taking responsibility for himself and his actions...

I mean there's just so much!

If Megumi dies at this point... ok, yes, and "what meaning will Gege give his death?" is what I would like to know to feel like it was a satisfying end to his arc.

Honestly. I just want to see Megumi work his magic. I want to see him get pissed off, like really pissed off and fed up with his fate, and I want to see how that changes him and what he makes of it.

I want to see him say "fuck this fate, I still have things I need to do."

And then maybe perhaps come to realize, once again, that he can't manipulate others because they too have a free will of their own.

I may be projecting here but... Megumi's manipulative tendencies and the way he relates to others, it feels like it comes from a place in which his inner-child has not learned that it does not need to do anything to fulfill his need to be loved.

Megumi is beloved, and its a real tragedy that he hasn't figured that out about himself.

And... if that is not relatable, then I don't know what is.