#he wasn't even 20 when he died. at the beginning of this story he's only 16. he is so young and already destroying himself.

[pheonix-inside]

Going insane over one of my OCs.

#listen. listen. listennnnn. #he had a chance to be good. to turn around and realize that what he was doing wasn't right #multiple times he was shown how horrible his actions were. and deep down he knew it too. #but he just dug his heels in and kept going #his mother tried to convince him. his siblings. his companion who had gone through thick and thin with him even had enough and begged him #but still he didn't stop #in fact he got worse #he let someone worse than the first to use and manipulate him. because this was something he was used to. being told what to do like this. #and in a final act of self destruction and desperation he made a decision that led to his death #and at the core of it all. he was just a kid who wanted approval. who'd been taught to look for it in all the wrong places. #he wasn't even 20 when he died. at the beginning of this story he's only 16. he is so young and already destroying himself. #and he thinks it's all for the greater good. he has to do this. it's his father's legacy. his kingdom's goal. he is now responsible for it #he has to go through with it #and as he dies he knows he failed. he begs for his enemy to let him die as she holds him in her arms and tries to help him. #he can't imagine a life where he has failed. if he had survived the battle he'd have probably found another way to die afterwards. #this self hatred and destruction is all he knows.

[noroi1000]

❝𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮-𝐒𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐢❞ Chapter 01

Satoru-Sensei | Next Chapter →

Summary: Gojo-sensei tells you that you are his. That you will always be together. Only with him. That he loves you. That you are his girlfriend. Only him and no one else. That he won't let you walk away from him. That he would never let anyone take him from him. Because he loves you and wants to spend his life with you. Your morning is as nice as your whole life.

A/n: There will be 20 chapters and epilogue.Gojo is a gentle yandere here who cares about the reader. Don't want then don't read!

Warnings in story:

Soft Yandere

teacher/ex-student relationship

Age difference (reader is 18, Gojo is 29)

NSFW (in one chapter)

fake death

Mistakes in chapters

Some say you have to look for happiness. Others say that happiness will come to you by itself.

How was your case?

Both became.

You were looking for happiness in life. That's why you decided to go to Jujutsu high. Because you hoped to find something there that you didn't have before.

And there you found someone very important to you. He himself came to you. Your happiness.

Part of the fact that your happiness is with you now came even earlier. When you were born with the Jujutsu technique that allowed you to live as a sorcerer from the beginning.

The door to happiness has opened for you.

And you just followed what fate gave you. Even though you were looking for happiness, you were looking for it among the opportunities that the moments presented to you.

You were looking for your happiness as much as you got it.

Everything that happened made sense. All the pain of your technique. That you're quiet and shy. It all made sense to get the happiness you wanted.

It all allowed you to get so close to one person… If your technique was different, you couldn't be so close to him.

If your character had been different, you would have failed as well. Even though you didn't try hard to win his love at first.

It came with time. As he got closer. When he was so sweet to you. It was the best feeling you've ever felt. With him you would never feel rejected. And when you finally felt it, it wasn't really there. Because he would never turn you away.

Life is a cycle of alternating rises and falls. Your path wasn't all downhill before. It was straight up or up.

Since you live with your lovely sensei, everything is downhill. More days go by during which you can smile sincerely when he is standing next to you.

You are unable to think about how your friends and parents feel. Because you weren't as happy with them as you were with him.

Everyone will come to terms with death someday. Every now and then someone dies in the world. You learned this honest truth in Jujutsu High. You've learned to accept death. others and even yours.

You weren't that much of a sorcerer. You had a powerful technique. But surely no other sorcerer has ever seen a young sorcerer act like you.

You refused to use your cursed energy. Because your Gojo-sensei gave you the opportunity. You could live with it without having to use technology. Because you will always be safe. And he'll assure you that your sweet face won't change.

You didn't need your technique when you lived with him. He didn't tell you to be a verb. You could just be you. His sweet girlfriend. His sweet and innocent ex-student.

You haven't been his student for two years. But you still feel like you did. Because you still like to call him sensei. Because he seems to like it. He liked it. You weren't like the rest. You used to call him "Satoru-Sensei" sometimes.

And all because he told you to call him by his name, and sometimes you forgot and you called him like a teacher.

But now that you're talking to him like that, everything's fine. Because when you say that to him, he smiles.

He takes it as sweet words. Because everything you say to him is cute.

He's not your sensei anymore. But he accepts that you sometimes talk to him like that. He still takes the form of a teacher for you. The teacher who teaches you to live. Life is not an easy task. Everyone has to know something to live. And you need a little more than other people to live with it.

You're younger than him. You were his student. You are gentle and cute. While he's been killing for years. In his hands is power that other people can only dream of. He was teaching you to work with your technique even though he didn't know it himself. He taught you something. But he gave you more feelings than science. He hugged you and took care of you. He encouraged me to keep working. Just to show you that you can let go now.

When you live with it, there's no need for you to fight. There is no need for you to use your Jujutsu technique. You do not have to do that. If you don't want to, he doesn't force you. If you don't want to be a sorcerer, you don't have to.

But I guess you never thought that after all this, he wouldn't let you be a sorcerer anyway. He won't let anything hurt you. He won't let you leave a safe place.

He almost lost you. He almost lost your smile. He almost lost your lovely pink cheeks. So he wasn't going to risk it.

He wanted to make you happy for the rest of your life. But in a place where you'll always be safe. Where no one can make your smile disappear. No one will be able to do that because no one else will ever be there for you. It will be only him.

People hurt you? They don't have to be by your side. Did non-humans hurt you? He will murder curses non-stop if he has to, to get revenge on this whole species.

You are his sweetheart. His sweet little Ashamed-chan…

But now, you're mochi to him. Baby. Sweetheart. Honey. Kawaii-chan.

Even though it was cute that you often embarrassed yourself, he didn't want your embarrassment to make you run away from his attention.

You must be lovely and loved. But you're supposed to be his (y/n).

He won't let you out into a dangerous world.

Because he almost lost you once.

The only thing you have to give him for eternal happiness with him is you.

Your happiness is Gojo-sensei. And his happiness is that you are with him.

No one could be with you but him. Toge? No. He couldn't. Yuji? Megumi? Even though they were his disciples and he trusted them, he could never trust them to hold your heart.

Your heart was tender and longing for love.

Only he could give you that. Because you only wanted him.

He has given you a lot from the very beginning. That's why he was the person you fell in love with. And no one could say otherwise. There was a lot between you. Now there's even more.

You've been here with him for almost two years. On the island. In your house. Where you feel best. Where you can spend time with him.

You were 18 now. And he's almost 30. But would you ever mind the age difference?

Gojo-sensei never changes. That's why it will never change between you either. You will be together because no one will stop you from doing so.

Only you are here. You only see his face. And he's someone you don't want to run away from. Why run away from the paradise you've been given?

You love your life with him. With your Satoru-Sensei who will always hold your hand and lead you through life.

He will not allow any danger near you. He won't let you stray from the right path. You will obediently walk holding his hand.

Because if he didn't love you, you wouldn't be here.

And he loved you so much. Most in the world. There will never be a moment when something turns out to be a lie.

Because Gojo-sensei tells you that you are his. That you will always be together. Only with him. That he loves you. That you are his girlfriend. Only him and no one else. That he won't let you walk away from him. That he would never let anyone take him from him. Because he loves you and wants to spend his life with you.

And there's not a single lie in that.

All this is the truest truth. And you don't even want to look for lies because you won't find it.

He is the most sincere and kind person you've ever met.

Your sensei is your true love.

A man who keeps his word and keeps you happy.

And in return you give him you.

For love you give him love.

"Your gentle touch in the morning always makes me melt for you."

Raising your head slightly as you lay on his chest, you stopped for a moment tracing your finger around his bare abdominal muscles.

"I'm melting for you, baby. And you don't know how happy I am. I can wake up next to you every morning."

"Sensei, Ohayo. I hope you slept well." You sat down slowly on his stomach and leaned over with a smile to give him a kiss on the lips.

A slight blush on your cheeks.

He licked his lips with a bigger smile after the kiss.

"When you greet me like that, I would never think that I slept badly. I slept with you. To wake up in the morning and see the most wonderful thing in the world next to me. To see my perfect girl sleeping cuddled up to me in my arms."

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk x you #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojo x y/n #jjk x reader #gojo #satoru-sensei #yandere gojo satoru #yandere gojo x reader

[ystrike1]

The Strongest Characters in the World are Obsessed With Me - By Zion (7.5/10)

Are you tired of seeing the same harem over and over? Are you too chicken to try something that's actually different at the same time? Well, look no further. This otome fantasy is just dark enough. Just well written enough and just pretty enough to give you what you want. The endgame love interest is the most predictable choice though.

Dahlia Pesteros has a bad feeling. She's the daughter of a loveless but rich noble family. Technically, she's favored over her brother. Life is good, but then she gets hit with a bunch of weird memories.

She realizes that she's in an otome game. A dark one with no real happy ending. Dahlia's elder brother is the final boss. A handsome villain that gets executed. One of the many things the heroine must face. Hikan, that great evil, hates Dahlia. Why? Well he is a Trancendental. A type of special magic user with ultimate power. Transcendentals are why the Frederick Empire is as strong as it is. Unfortunately, power comes with some drawbacks in this universe. Transcendentals don't live long. They rarely make it to old age. Transcendentals are smart, strong, pretty...and lonely, jaded, and unstable. Imagine being loved because you're a weapon. That's the kind of thing that would drive anyone crazy. Transcendentals that lose control have to be put down like dogs. Raising one is a complex process...but Hikans parents sent him away. Dahlia is the "normal" daughter her parents wanted. They sent Hikan away, and ignored their cute daughter to boot. Hikan is still envious though, because their mother did hate him.

She called Dahlia a blessing, even though her second pregnancy killed her.

When Hikan returns from the exile his own mother imposed he has bad news. Father is dead. Dahlia doesn't react at all, because Father totally sucked. He wasn't affectionate with either of them, so the two siblings try to move on. Transcendentals are suspicious of others, and they are naturally cold. They're less emotional. So, Dahlia acts cute. She knows Hikan will kill her if she pisses him off. From there a delicate balancing act begins. In the beginning the siblings don't like each other. Dahlia wants to sell off her jewels and leave the country, but then the author dedicates about 20 chapters to believeable scenes. Believeable, gradual moments. By chapter 40 we know Hikan is a dangerous and lonely teenager desperate for validation. He's desperate enough to run the Pesteros family at the age of 16. It is admirable, even if he isn't always pleasant or happy. Dahlia gradually starts to care for her brother, and she worries about his deadly future. Where he gets executed and dies obsessed with a heroine that doesn't love him back.

Dahlia has a surrogate mom. Duchess Mary. The only person who visited when her parents started neglecting her. Mary is a Trancendental. No Trancendental can be turned away, so Mary visits the little girl often. Dahlia is still...a child. She has some past life memories, but no attachments to her other life. She needs Mary as an emotional support. Mary has a rough life. Her husband's dead. Her face was burnt and oh no...she's fodder.

Yup. The kind duchess is just a background character in the original story. Her Trancendental rage and slaughter ignites the main plot. Dahlia doesn't let her die. Dahlia can heal Trancendentals with her touch.

That's a big deal.

The Emperor hides her ability, because it could destabilize the nation. You see, Trancendentals live in constant pain. Power comes with a very high cost. Dahlia makes that cost 0. With her by your side you're a God.

My biggest problem with this series is the old heroine. Adalicia is not magical. She was the heroine of a DARK otome game where nothing gets fixed and everybody is crazy. She's only posing as a noble woman. She's actually an assassin. Not a meek lady. She becomes Dahlia's lady in waiting. Adalicia witnesses Dahila in action...and that's it. She becomes a supportive lady in waiting....there's no real reason for her to exist. She's kind of the lesbian option in the harem I guess??? She's obsessive like all the men but...um...she feels kinda pointless. She just babysits Dahila sometimes. She adores Dahila blindly.

It gets a bit boring.

This is how relevant she feels in a nutshell.

(Also rip my favorite character design. He's a side character. Bummer.)

The finale for season 1 is really, really good. It introduces the love interest in a really fun way. It shows off Hikans character development AND it establishes how fucked up the Trancendentals really are. You awaken around age 19 or 20. During that time you literally go insane. Hikan feels aggressively possessive of Dahlia. He almost accidentally kills her.

The second prince, Cedric, saves her. Cedric is good, but he's kind of boring. He feels...like the main guy in a harem. He has his moments, and flaws. He likes to go on adventures without telling the Emperor. He hates people. No really. Like most Trancendentals he has very little empathy. When Dahila puts her life on the line for Hikan he falls for her. He doesn't know about her powers. He genuinely likes her. That's great. It's nice when the main character doesn't get love solely because of their special powers.

Meldon is an illegitimate son who rises to power after he becomes a Trancendental.

(He's obsessed with Dahila.)

This is Duchess Mary's son.

That means he's the nice guy option.

(He's obsessed with Dahila.)

The Trancendentals are going to fight over her, because of her powers. It's inevitable. The last two harem members get added in season two, which feels like a slap. You and I know they're just there to pad the run time. Cedric changes his personality to be more appealing to Dahlia. No, literally. He does homework and he learns how to pretend to be nice. He puts in effort, but season two already feels weak as paper. The author is definitely milking this plot. I honestly think it should have ended after the finale fight. Like, with Cedric proposing and an engagement.

But we can't do that. This is an otome story, and we have to pretend and act like we don't know Cedric is her future husband.

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #webtoon #otome isekai #otome #shoujo #The Strongest Characters in the World are Obsessed With Me

[ruporas]

I don't know if this is a heavy question to ask- it may be. Feel free to ignore it.

But I was questioning myself if it was even an okay thing to ship Tristamp! vash x tristamp! wolfwood due to the age gap???

In the manga it was proven ww was of age (since the treatments went over a course of years) but it wasn't so clear in tristamp, especially with the whole forced growth sequence being more cut short than the manga. He may be in the body of a man but, isn't he still a child? is what I mean to ask.

At the end of the day I know they are all fictional and to block if I don't like but it still has me wondering.

I've seen a lot of people simultaneously pull "dni pedos" (which is more than okay and I agree) but then also go and ship what they ship.

I'm just genuinely confused I think. Is there something I am missing? or is he still a child in a man's body?

I don't know who else to ask, because I also know at the end of the day you're just an artist on the other end of the line. I'm sorry 😭

yeah, it's confusing because stampede never states it directly, but i'm certain that wolfwood is an adult from the brief glimpses of time shown in stampede itself and in trusting the studio themselves.

as we saw with rollo, he was experimented on for 5 years before ending up like this

and then we see him again in this same state 20 years later in episode 5. we get concrete numbers for rollo who we can estimate to be in his 20s when he dies. see here too that elendira, 20 years ago, also still looks like that, the same in the present. i'm saying all of this to dissuade any arguments that might be like "wolfwood should look older and not the same as he did in the flashback of ep 6" because there are only so many 3d models orange studio can make and design. i also think that ep 5 itself is meant to exemplify the quick years that can go by when in reference to a flashback.

the mention of wolfwood aging "in just a few months" shouldn't be an indicator of his age because narrative-wise, they only brought that up to emphasize him being a s+ grade and unique and to highlight how much he's suffered in just a short period of time. wolfwood's flashback is put together in one(1) episode, much of it is used to highlight the bond between him and livio in their childhood because that's the point of his arc. because of that, any scenes that shows him working under the eye of michael are all cut because it isn't important at this time of the show. there's a huge time gap missing in wolfwood's history because studio orange chose specific years to give weight to the arc they wanted to present to us first.

this is like the only scene we get of him doing his job under the eom, at the beginning of ep 6

and him here is different from how he is here.

so from the show itself, i think those are the obvious points that suggests wolfwood is not Still 10 years old when he gets sent to retrieve vash.

in reference to my second point of believing in the studio -- because they heavily based stampede off of maximum, i find it Hard to believe they'd randomly make wolfwood a minor because it genuinely serves no benefit to his story to make that change. there would be less weight to his bond with vash because wolfwood has always been the character to challenge vash, they're meant to be equals. much of maximum and 98, Even Badlands Rumble, play up the significance of vash and wolfwood's relationship and how the two can argue and depend on each other as people with similar life experiences. orange studio pour love into stampede and respects nightow and his craft and as a result, i think they'd keep vash and wolfwood on the same level in this adaption too.

all and all, they're both adults in previous versions and they're both adults in this version. final phase will probably give room for more of wolfwood's past experiences now that we know most of vash's story, maybe that would resolve any confusion.

hope that helps!

#asks #if anyone wants me to tag this with cw or tw anything please lmk #but yeah. stampede could benefit from being more direct with it #however i think storytelling wise there's just no point in it. imo looking at how he interacts with the other 3 #and the actions and choices he makes throughout the series is telling enough so

[beanyboobee]

Random theories of mine:

1. What were the Archvisites?

2. Teachers out here scheming

3. How does vanitas die?

What were Archvisties to vampire society? I keep wondering that because I find it so curious how so very few people actually know what they are, and the only ones we have seen who know right away are count orlock, chloe and Ruthvan, all high ups in vampire society, while those of lower status, aka count Orlocks servents, Jean Jacqes, didn't know until they were told.

Surely if Archivistes were well known their massacre would still be remembered as it wasn't that long ago [if we go by Noes age] but yet the servent of Orlocks who does know what an Archvisite is, refers to the massacre as happening 'long ago'

Concidering how long some vampires live, isnt it odd for them to refer to something not even 20 years old as a long time ago ?

We also know Archvisites are differant to regular vampires, as Dominique claimed vanitas wanted to use noe for his unique abilities, (abilities not just ability to see memories), how it (presumably) took longer for chloes potion to kick on for him

Not to mwntion- SPOILER FOR THE LATEST CHAPTER CHAPTER 61

how Noe is already starting to recall what Ruthvan did to him, which shouldn't be possiable if Ruthvan is more powerful than him.

Moving into another theory that I mentioned before but I keep finding more and more proof for,

I think EVERYTHING since the beginning has been planned by teacher, everything, not just the small things. From him just os happening to find noe at an auction, as far as we know the teacher didn't have any others in the mansion so he just so happend to go to a human auction and find the last remaining archvisite? As we know noe added that the vampires who kidnapped hom mistook him for a human?

It was almost as if Noe was the main peice of the story the teacher wanted to see play out. Not to mention in Domiques first appearance she says this-

Who told her where Noe was? Realistically how would anyone know that Noe was with count Orlock? Unless count orlock told someone and it got passed on? But the only person who knew noe was in Paris was the teacher.

The teacher sending a letter to count orlock with Noes full name and asking him to help Noe with anything he needs is also weirdly suspicious because there was no need to give out Noes full name unless he knew the effect it would have.

I am also of the mindset that everything happening is a timeloop, of this situation has played out time and time again, from the conversation lady Archvisitie and the teacher have in Chapter [ 58]

That his excitement at Noe coming with him, "Yes I am having fun because you came with me" implying Noe had a choice not to come, and as we know Teacher loves throwing around the word "choice" an awful lott.

If it is true abiut this being a time loop or some sort of time shenanigans, Noe could be the slightly differant thing Lady Archvisite and Teacher discussed in chapter [58 and 59 ]

One small "choice" can change the entire direction of a story after all.

Also final theory, Vanitas Dies by Noe not grabbing his hand when crossing the portal, I'm still of the mind the story will end with Atlus crumbling. And Vanitas will be trapped in the middle world because Noe didn't grab his hand. Why? Simple, I like to think this scene is foreshadowing

Noe keeps moving between saying- he killed vanitas by his own hand, and, he regrets not grabbing his hand that day, the death of vanitas won't be this big and major gruesome thing like we are led to beleive but rather him being stuck in a void, as it would also explain vanitas saying this during his 'death'

As we know Noe is an unreliable narrator, he blames himself for alott of things that happend, and tends to overexagerate how much of a part he played in the tragedy, as we can see during the whole Louis situation, he holds alott of regret and blames himself for it to the point even years later Domi has to remind him it wasn't his fault, so by him saying he killed Vanitas by his own two hands, it could be something as simple as him- being unable to catch vanitas in time. Or hesitating before holding onto him because Vanitas might of been the to let go.

There was enough of time between Vanitas dying and Noe somehow being the cause of it, for Vanitas to give him the reassurance that he won't die that he just won't be apart of this world,

It could of been said in a similar fashion to how Jean jauqes forced Noe to drink his blood so someone would remember hom and chloe, because if we think about it in that sense. He could of meant he won't die because Now will always be around to remember.

Making Vanitas a figure similar to the shapeless one or lady archvisite; who mainly seem to operate and live in the between world.

#myart #vanitas no carte #the case study of vanitas #vanitas #vanitas anime #vanitas no carte manga #vanoe #vanoe fanfic #memoir of vanitas #les memoires de vanitas

[bonefall]

I'm glad you're keeping the part where Thunder puts himself between Clear Sky and Grey Wing, willingly showing that he would rather die before letting Clear Sky kill his dad.

That's actually a Bones Addition. You just think it's canon because it literally should have been there from the very beginning. Thunder doesn't get between them at any point during the battle, he runs towards them only to get interrupted by 2 people trying to kill him.

First was Falling Feather, who Jackdaw's Cry then jumps on and dies fighting with, sister killing brother.

Second was Leaf, who's a diehard Clear Sky supporter and general bully.

In canon, Clear Sky stops the battle after Gray Wing says the line, non-fucking-sensically imo. Killing his BROTHER is too far, but killing someone who wasn't even attacking him? A noncombatant who said something mildly insulting? That wasn't. Rainswept Flower did the SAME thing Gray Wing did and still got bumped off for it;

“Is this worth it?” he heard Clear Sky hiss at Rainswept Flower. Scrambling to her paws, she faced him. “What do you mean?” Clear Sky flattened his ears menacingly. “Are you ready to die just to stop me from making borders?” Rainswept Flower curled her lip. “You’ll keep stealing land as long as we let you.” “Stealing land?” Clear Sky’s mew trembled with rage, “I’m just making sure my cats never starve.” Rainswept Flower’s gaze flitted around the lush slopes of the hollow. “How could any cat starve here? There’s so much. Wanting more is just greedy!” “How dare you!” With a snarl, Clear Sky leaped for her, grabbing her throat between his jaws. Her paws flailed desperately, lashing out at thin air as he shook her like prey. Then she hung still. Clear Sky dropped her, gazing coldly at her lifeless body. “You never understood. I’m not greedy. I’m just strong.”

-The First Battle, Chapter 20

Then in Clear Sky's pathetic wet beast scene, he stares down at Rainswept's corpse, and thinks "I was so angry I don't remember killing her :("

So how, exactly, does this same character keep his cool when Gray Wing says the same shit but worse?? Is he really so controlled by emotion that his logical processes flip off, or fucking not? Gray Wing was refusing to submit, lunging at him, calling him power hungry and taunting him that he would kill his own littermate for it, and THAT manages to get through Clear Sky's blood-poisoned head?

"ouuugh it's his brotherr that's why his personality completely changes for him" the fucking guy tried to have this same brother murdered in Sun Trail by Fox. The first book. He EXILED HIS OTHER BROTHER for having a broken leg because he, "didn't want to look biased"

Again; is he controlled by his fear and anger or not? Is this a man who would snap the neck of someone he cares about because he feels insulted, or not?

The answer is that the Erins are breaking their spines bending over backwards to try and keep him "redeemable" when he shouldn't be. He's whatever the plot needs him to be, but the most consistent character traits point towards Clear Sky being the kind of person who would never have wanted to change his ways.

So, they write Clear Sky ridiculously backing down for Gray Wing, calling off the battle and "coming to his senses" instead of having Thunder do WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE DONE and jump to his REAL dad's defense.

This is what I mean when I mention how firmly I feel that Clear Sky's Redemption Arc was a mistake. He works best as a villain, a fearful, proud, controlling monster, understood by his impacts on other characters rather than as a person the story should concern itself with sympathy for.

#and because of that. Because of THAT. #DOTC is full of abuse apologia. #Because it firmly and desperately wants you to empathize with people like Clear Sky. His victims? The story is less interested in them #DOTC decided early on that Clear Sky was a 'good person deep down' and was working to that conclusion from the start #WC as a series believes that there are good people and bad people #And good people can sometimes do bad things but they're still good 'under it' #I reject this. There are NOT fundamentally good nor fundamentally bad people #We ARE our actions. Not our thoughts. Not some innate quality #It's never too late to be a better person and to do better than you did yesterday #But people like Clear Sky are terrible because *they dont care.* #They will never change because they don't want to #And focusing soooo hard on this person waiting for him to 'reveal' the goodness inside of him Deep Down is a fool's game #You will be disappointed over and over again #He HAD power and you see what he wants to do with it #Control and abuse people so they never leave or scare him. #He is an angry and egotistical person. That's it. #Evil is not complex. It's very simple. PAINFULLY simple. #It feels good to get what you want #warrior cats analysis

[fyeah-anya-corazon]

Getting tangled in a web. A Madame Web, you could say - An Anya Corazón centric Madame Web review (SPOILERS AHEAD)

So, I originally did not planned to pay to watch MW (I did considered watching it later on for free if just to do a funny review), but my best friend wanted to watch it to roast it, so as meanwhile it was her I was like "I'm in".

(Completely unrelated, but adding to the MW watching experience, the top of the projection was off-screen as you can see, and it was like that for 20 minutes, so that was a great sign)

This is going to be focused entirely on Anya, so to give some quick thoughts about the movie itself that you've probably heard from other reviews: yeah, it's bad. We were making fun of it at the beginning but by the last hour we were bored and wanted it to end. The damn stolen taxi got laughs from us, so there's that.

Now, Anya.

Isabela Merced does a fine job with the material she's given. To the credit of the movie, she and Julia are the most likeable of the main protagonists, with Anya being the most sympathetic of the bunch. In what was the cringest secene in the film, were the girls dance to Toxic by Britney Spears on a restaurant's table (my friend was dying, since we're filmmaking students and she was lamenting that this was directed by a woman and she just keep saying that absolutely no girl would act like that and do that) she at least was the only who resisted the most from joining.

This version, as you could guess by her costume, is mostly based on the Marvel's Spider-Man 2017™ cartoon Anya.

She's an academic genius who spits out sciency words and sentences. Even her bolas here seem to have some tech-integrated in them, makingh them more like drones than her traditional ones, at least that's what they look like for like the three seconds they appear on-screen. They still failed to give her a pony tail.

Our first look of her is alongside the other Spider-Women in a future vision were they violently attack and murder in cold blood Ezekiel. They attack him at his apartment and throw him out of the building as they stare at him as he falls.

This is in contrast to her general depiction of her being in a constant struggle to give up to her vengeful tendencies.

TO THE FILM'S CREDIT, it also heavily implies that they were never going to kill him, but that "vision" represented how the Spider-Women trio would lead to his downfall. So if he never chased them he would still be alive in the future.

Now, among other changes...

In a previous post, I reacted strongly about the movie changing her nationality to Peruvian. I got responses saying that the reviewer was wrong and she wasn't peruvian in the film. Having seen the film, yes, i can confirm that she's not peruvian.... they still changed her nationality, though.

In the comics Anya is mexican from her mother's side and puertorrican from her father's. In the movie it's stated that her mom died when she was a child, while his dad was deported. This means that they did changed her nationality, since puertorricans are considered US citizens and therefore can't be deported. It's never stated where exactly she comes from. she's just generic latina.

Althought a illegal immigrant approach could potentially work, the movie does nothing with that beyond having it being a excuse for Anya to be adopted by Cassandra by the end of the movie. Let alone, the fact that the story of the latina character being an ilegal immigrant feels cliche by this point. Even more egregious, to contrast with the comic, her dad is a puertorrican highly respected reporter who was even hired by the Fantastic Four, turning him into a illegal immigrant pretty much added nothing to the story beyond having a orphan Anya.

Overall, in their attempt to make their own version of Anya, as well as shoehorn her into a movie that was not about her, we ended up losing one the most interesting and charming characters and origin stories that can hold a movie by her own.

At the end of it, this movie didn't improve Anya's perception to the general public, but it didn't hurt it either.

It tells you a lot that her cameo in Across the Spider-Verse got more people talking about her than this movie did.

#Anya Corazon #Madame Web #Arana #Araña #Spider-Girl #SpiderGirl

[will-ruadh]

rant post about akira (1988) being overrated

and no, I don't mean I just didn't really like it, or it wasn't my type of movie. after reading so much about it being the greatest anime film of all time, I at least expected a good story which just. wasn't there. yeah, I agree, the "animation is amazing especially for that time" but animation is just a bonus to an actual plot and the plot was so choppy, like they couldn't decide which scene to put next. I feel like they wanted to say "nukes are bad, absolute power is bad, nothing is truly only black or white, and everyone has a potential for good or bad things" which is like. okay, I got that in the first 20 minutes of the movie, now what. now come 2 hours of tightly packed action scenes without gradually resolving stuff that was shown in the beginning. Kaori is in exactly three scenes to ask about Tetsuo, get SAd and then die. okay. Kaneda raises a question about Kei and Ryu, it's never answered. Kei apparently is connected to the Espers??? actually, forget about that. Ryu probably died in that alleyway. or maybe not. also Akira started ww3. how? don't worry about that. he nuked Tokyo and then... someone nuked someone else for some purpose. we should keep guessing about that probably. had to google about Espers after watching just to understand where they came from, and they're just random children? orphans, maybe? and turns out anyone could get those powers unlocked, but while watching I got the idea that they were special from the start. btw Espers are 30+ adults. did everyone forget about that or what. Tetsuo immediately started killing everyone because he was bullied :( I mean, we all want to nuke the whole world when that happens right? no second thoughts? I'd say, Kaneda and Tetsuo beefing was the most okay-developed plotline out of all. and that's it.

basically, animation IS absolutely god-tier, but I forgot about it trying to make sense of what was happening and where things were going and why. i just can't call something a good movie when the story is all over the place, and not in a "it's up to you to decide what happened" but just "we set it up and then dropped without even any hints"

#akira 1988

[jeweled-blue-eyes]

I think the thing about what makes the cha siyeon and iklies thing worse is that where cha siyeon is from slavery and underage relationships are illegal and morally worng. Like one could make the excuse that for the people in the game world, slavery and courting 17 year olds isn't that bad cause they aren't illegal and not morally frowned upon by society which would still be a really terrible excuse but like...

Cha Siyeon is from a country, a world where slavery is the most inhumane crime and the legal age is 18 so she knows these things and yet she hasn't shown any disgust towards the actions of others or herself, only a mild sort of self centred disdain. There is a manhwa that I've read, can't remember the name, where the main leads get sent back in time and the guy feels like a criminal when he tries to date the girl he used to date at the time, when he was 17, the female lead kinda forced him to do so in order not to change the past so much. But I don't think cha siyeon ever felt disgusted with her actions not did she feel gross.

And the escapism and power fantasy that some manhwas have to offer have a lot of unexamined biases in them that make them into colonialist, pro slavery pieces of work.

And another thing that felt really unnecessary for me was the comonnars having no last name. Like why? Was it really necessary? And there isn't any resolution for that down the lane.

As far as I know the age of consent in Korea is 20. That means Iklies was 3 years below. I just wanted to mention this because the age of consent being 18 in some western countries shouldn't be treated as universal to the rest of the world especially when the beginning of the story was set in South Korea, Asia. Some readers might be arguing that Iklies being 17-18 by the end of the story makes him "technically" legal.

Cha Siyeon's lack of morals is strange. If I were let's say transported to a world where cannibalism was legal and the only way out was to kill and eat another human being I would not suddenly stop feeling horrified at the idea. She doesn't react viscerally to the things the game tells her to do - doesn't feel physically ill or disgusted. Her only comment on Iklies age was that she isn't usually into older guys but he would have to do. That's it. Her problem was that Iklies wasn't her type. An average modern day person accepting slavery and statuatory rape so easily is not realistic. To me it makes it harder to empathize with her as her behaviour is so far removed from reality and her inner world doesn't really reflect that of a modern day woman. The author could have shown the struggles of a moral person being forced to carry out immoral acts by a sadistic gaming system and how they would desperately fight against it, seek out an alternative, find a middle ground or finally fold and try to do something good afterwards in an attempt to clear their conscience. Instead the author created a character lacking a certain set of morals unless it's convenient for the narrative.

The way Cha Siyeon shows empathy is not consistent. She's willing to do terrible things in order to escape the game but sometimes for narrative reasons, as if a switch is turned, she feels bad. For example when she is rejecting gifts and friendly gestures that could improve her chances to get out of the game earlier with the justification that these things should have belonged to og Penelope. It feels ooc to me that she would do without valuables when this rejection won't benefit anyone not even the girl that has died. Also what makes her so sure that og Penelope won't return to her body and have a Happy Ending once Cha Siyeon has won and returned to her own world? Even more a reason to accept every gift with a smile. Romancing og Penelope's murderer is much worse than receiving a gift from one of her abusers anyway. But Cha Siyeon has to act rude and abrasive towards LI's that aren't Callisto in order to make her romance with Callisto work.

She is also a huge hypocrite I find. She likes empathy in theory but is unwilling to put it into actions. Mourning the owner of her body is easy and effortless because she's already dead. She never knew her personally and could project herself onto og Penelope's suffering with the illusion that she cares when in reality she is just self-pitying. She thinks she feels empathy for og Penelope but upon meeting another abused teenager (Iklies) she just becomes another source of trauma in his life. Like the duke she brings someone home with a specific purpose. Like the duke she neglects that person and is genuinely surpised when the staff abuses them. Like the duke the only apology she gives are gifts and expects money would fix everything. Another example of her hypocricy is when she is going on a date with Vinter which turns out to be a charity project where Vinter is giving food to orphan children. If I remember correctly Cha Siyeon acts angry when Vinter draws her attention to some children who were waiting in line that have already gotten their share of bread. Cha Siyeon was in no place to judge the way he distributed the food bought with his money when she accompanied him purely out of self-interest and otherwise would have eaten cake comfortably in the Eckart mansion while the kids would have starved if not for Vinter. Her worrying about not being dressed for the occasion only makes her more unsympathic.

Surnames were introduced in the 11th century but I doubt the author did their homework or cared at all. It would make sense for the Eorkan Empire to have surnames as they incorporated occupied territories, the population grew and people would need more names to distinguish among themselves. Volume 1 states that Penelope didn't even have a last name which implies that there must be some commoners that do have surnames but the story never bothered to elaborate on the reason why some commoners have surnames and she doesn't. Personally I don't have such an issue with it since we don't meet many commoner characters of importance. It's at the bottom of the list of things I would criticize about the manhwa.

I have more issues with this:

Slavery is treated as a just punishment. Another villain joins the oppressed population so we, the readers won't feel compassion towards them. No voice is given to the innocent ones that have truly suffered working themselves to death in the Duke's diamond mines (which now belong to the protagonist) or were torn apart by the wild beasts in the fighting pits. Incidentally I don't find it believable as punishment. I have never heard of nobles being demoted to slavery. Historically even the method with which nobles were executed was different from the way commoners were executed in order to preserve their dignity. Some say that slavery is a fate even worse than death. I feel as if this was deliberately done to manipulate the impression of the readers and make them side with the slavers by making the only known slaves criminals that were originally belonging to the aristocracy. It was very low of the author to do this.

#notanon #answered asks #anti cha siyeon #vadd

[cakemagemaeve]

So today's the 6th anniversary of Sharif's death. I can't believe he's been gone so long. I can't believe his grave is now someone's driveway. I still can't believe it's really over. To say that I miss him with all my heart would be an understatement the size of Jupiter. Part of me still can't even accept that he's gone, that I'm never going to see him again. Part of me still feels like if I were to drive down to one of the barns I had him at, he'd be there waiting for me to give him a treat and a hug. I'd give damn near anything just to be able to give that horse one last hug, or even just to hear his soft nicker that he did every time he saw me coming.

Honestly, I still feel as though a large part of me died when he did. It's like someone ripped out huge chunks of my heart and soul and burned them away, leaving only gaping wounds and cinders behind. I see reminders of him everywhere, I keep as many reminders of him with me as I can at all times, and each and every one of them hurts like a half-healed wound getting poked and prodded, but I know that not having them would be even more painful.

I wear a bracelet with his tail-hair braided into it, I hung his halter on the wall just above my pillow, and sometimes at night I reach up and just hold onto it for a while. My phone's lock-screen is a picture of Sharif. My phone's background is a different picture of Sharif. In every video game that has horses, I always try to find one that looks like him and then name that horse after him, even if it requires mods to do so. I named my Galarian Rapidash Sharif, because frankly it's almost exactly what I always thought a Pokemon version of Sharif would be like, right down to the typing. Seriously, it's damn near perfect. Sharif's barn nickname was Princess Unicorn for a reason, after all.

He was a purebred (though not registered) Arabian, and like most Arabian horses, he was beautiful and he knew it. <333 And yet, as prissy as he was, he was also one of the sweetest and most loving horses I've ever had the privilege of meeting. Even at the beginning when I was having so much trouble with him (long story short, his previous owner was a liar and a cheat who claimed he was fully green broken and safe to ride when he very much wasn't, and may have even drugged him the day I went out there for a test ride), he was still so affectionate and so very eager to please even though he was scared and confused.

It really was a very difficult experience for a while, and I even briefly considered selling him (sending him back to that woman was out of the question), but ultimately I couldn't give up on him, and I'm so glad I didn't. All of the pain and frustration of those first few months ended up being more than worth it, because I got to spend 20 years with the most amazing and wonderful horse in the world. We had so many adventures together, we had so much fun together, and when I was going through some of the worst years of my life, he was the only thing that kept me going. Honestly, if it weren't for Sharif I probably wouldn't have made it through my teen years. I know I was incredibly lucky to have had him in my life for so long, and it's not that I'm not grateful for it by any means, but god, it wasn't long enough. It wasn't anywhere near long enough. As my icon says, forever would not have been long enough.

Anyway, what was just supposed to be a short post ended up running a liiiittle bit long, and to make up for that I'll end this by sharing one of my all-time favorite pictures of me and Sharif.

#i miss my horse #grief #cw: animal death

[chloedrewitt]

Book Review: "The Cruel Prince" by Holly Black

Spoiler-free

Genre: young adult, fantasy • Triggers: murder, death, suicide, graphic descriptions of corpses, bullying, child abuse • Year of Publication: 2018

Plot: ★★★

Characters: ★★

Writing Style: ★

Re-Readability: ★★★

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General Thoughts

I want to start this by saying that I really wanted to like this book. Unfortunately, I ended up hating it. The plot is incredibly interesting and the idea of the Faerie world super engaging. However, everything that I liked about this book ends exactly there. I really did like the plot and all the ideas Black had, however her writing is simply not for me. Had another author with a different style written this book I am sure I would have enjoyed it. But let's get into the review, and please, remember this is purely my subjective opinion. This book is widely popular, so it has found its audience for sure. I just wasn't part of that, and that is okay. Nevertheless, I wanted to share my thoughts.

Plot

As I said above, the plot is the book's strong suit for me. Despite the fact that, keeping faerie's hate for mortals in mind, it would have made more sense to me had Madoc killed Jude and Taryn then and there in the prologue. Why does Madoc take Jude and Taryn with him to raise them? It would only make sense to kill the children that blossomed out of a union such as their parents, without giving too much away. Is it fae customs not to? Is it some sort of personal ego problem he has? Is it empathy, despite the obvious “monster”-like personality? It is never fully explained to the extent where I could say “Ah, yes! That makes sense.” (Maybe it is explained in the sequels, I can’t say).

Another thing that made no sense to me was when the spies captured Cardan. I won't get into too many details to still keep this spoiler free, but there was this one occurrence I really had trouble finding realistic. In that scene, the spies, the ones with the actual experience and training, let Cardan go to have a drink with him. Because he is oh, so charming. Keep in mind, Cardan is the only one who can seal his brother’s reign, which would be bloody and cruel (I think the book’s title refers more to his brother than Cardan. I won't say which brother though). It seems like a completely illogical plot device to show how amazing Jude is and how she knows everything better than the others. You know, the actual spies. Even if they don’t care what happens to Faerie or its king, I find it very OOC for a spy to free one of their captives, especially to have a drink with him. They should be able to resist Cardan’s "charm".

Still, even with these inconsistencies, I thought the plot was engaging and interesting. The whole setting, a human girl growing up in the faerie lands who sort of has to navigate this world where even the food could kill her any moment, sounds very intriguing. I also loved how the faerie's around her manipulated her despite the fact she was the only one able to lie.

I do, however, want to state that this is not an enemies to lovers in my opinion. The romance is merely a sub plot anyway and did not really do it for me, but Cardan e.g. kicking dirt in Jude's food is bullying, nothing more. To me, this is a bullies to lovers if anything. Still, the main plot saved the book for me, but unfortunately it was not enough for me to continue the series.

Characters

This is where the story really begins to crumble for me. I barely liked any characters. Probably the only ones who did not annoy me where Vivienne and Cardan, but only in the second half of the book.

Let’s start with Jude, since she is the main character. It might be because I am in my 20s and she is still a child (16 or 17 I believe), but Jude annoyed me so much. The only thing that made sense about her was the fact that she wanted to prove to herself and the fae that she was worthy. Which, after living in a world that tells you you are dirt is understandable.  I will get more into the writing style later, but it was so dry and emotionless that it made her sound like some robot, programmed to do only one thing: prove to the pretty fae that she’s worthy. Not to mention, it also made her sound very immature. Jude gets praised by the book community for being this super strong heroine that is super relatable and people can look up to - but I just saw none of that. Instead, I saw an insecure child trying to be included in things that are too big for her. When I mentioned this to someone they asked me if I read a lot of YA because "this is what YA heroines are like". I do, in fact, read a lot of YA and I can still say that Jude felt way younger than she was supposed to be. Comparing her to other YA heroines who are roughly the same age only strengthens this for me.

Let’s move on to Cardan. In the first half of the book, I wished someone would just punch him. When he was actually being punished later on I honestly didn’t feel bad for him. He treated Jude like shit, which, yes, I know, was the whole point but again, he did it in a very immature way. I’m thinking about the time he kicked dirt into Jude’s food or wanted her to kiss his feet. However, I later saw that this made sense for the character. He is insecure because of the way he grew up; isolated, lonely and faced with punishment. And in the second half of the book he was actually likeable as well. Cardan feels like the only character with actual depth. Where Jude had potential, Cardan had execution. However, Cardan and Jude’s immaturity made me uncomfortable as a reader sometimes. Mixed with the dry writing style, I could not help but imagine them as way younger than they were, all while they were making out and killing people or running around with a sword. 

Madoc. Oh, Madoc. How I dislike this character. Nothing about him made sense to me. He is a huge hypocrite. What exactly is his motivation? Everything was justified by him being a "monster" by nature, but that just didn’t satisfy me. First of all, "monster" is a very subjective term. No one is ever truly evil, and I would have just wished that Madoc wasn’t so one-dimensional. It made reading the entire arc that involved him hard. And if he really is a monster, why was he so nice to Jude and Taryn? Maybe I missed it somewhere, but I am really not sure why he didn’t kill the twins on the spot when he saw them (it's not a spoiler, this is literally the prologue) and only took Vivienne, his actual daughter, back to Faerie. I suppose taking the twins was meant to show he actually has depth to him, but the repetitive "he’s a monster" with absolutely no evidence for that claim ruined it for me.

This is something which Black does quite often, by the way. She makes a claim about a character but then gives barely any or no evidence at all to support this claim and the reader is simply expected to believe her.

The Writing Style

So, a little background info about what I personally enjoy reading. I study English Literature, so I am faced with “pretentious” writing almost every day. It is just a personal preference, but it is what I generelly enjoy. For me, a book has to have a healthy combination of dry and lyrical writing, so it doesn't reach either purple prose or sahara territory. The Cruel Prince's writing style is very dry and straight to the point. This can work to increase tension during a dramatic scene, but using it throughout the entire book does exactly the opposite. Some people will still like that, which I can respect. However, for me it was just boring to read and, to repeat myself once more, it made Jude sound very immature. Why? I can’t say for sure. But what I know is that in writing, everything has an effect on the reader. The writing style, the scenery, hell, even the metre. The writing style in this book simply had this effect on me. 

Another thing that I didn’t like was the several occasions of telling and not showing. Black mentioned three times in just a few pages that Jude and Cardan were enemies and they hate each. We got it, okay? There is no need to repeat it a million times. Perhaps she wanted to portray it as Jude telling herself they’re enemies and that she can’t pursue him, but it really did not seem that way to me and it unfortunately annoyed me.

Re-Readability

I think this a book you can definitely re-read if you liked it. It can be fun trying to look for clues within the narration that point to the big twists in the end. I personally just cannot put myself through this book again for all the reasons mentioned above.

Conclusion

I really cannot understand the hype of this book to be honest. Yes, the premise is interesting but the rest just does not do it for me and comparing it to other YA books, it felt incredibly immature to read. I am almost saddened to say that I regret spending almost ten euros on a copy of this, but what's done is done. I do, however, love the aesthetics of the book and will always stop to like a video of the wonderful cosplayers dressing up as the characters.

#the cruel prince #holly black #jude x cardan #cardan greenbriar #booktok #bookish #book reviews #book review #jude duarte #prince cardan

[scumcoin]

Pondering and Rambling About Isekai A Little Bittttt.....

Rewatching VS Knights of Lamune & 40 Fire. (mouthful of a title, henceforth 40 Fire)

For the unfamiliar, the Lamune series is SD mecha anime series, comparable to Mashin Eiyuu Wataru and Madou King Granzort. in both TV anime the hero is some bozo kid who gets sucked into a video game (in 40 Fire's case, a CD-ROM game that was inserted into a console that suspiciously resembles a playstation) only to be gilded with the title of the great hero Lamuness: in this case, our new protagonist Lamunedo is christened Lamuness the Third. It's pretty much text that Lamunedo is the son of the previous hero... I honestly don't wanna think about it too hard so I won't but his parents look like Milk, the last show's heroine and love interest, and the original protagonist.

It really be like that.

Given I've already watched this show (albeit over a decade ago and never in Japanese, and I suspect heavily censored as well), I probably won't be doing a lot of posts on it, but I recently rewatched a chunk of the original and I've been thinking about both shows approach to isekai and hell, the approach many other isekai shows take. Shows like this, Fushigi Yuugi, Those Who Hunt Elves, et cetera. There... wasn't much "I died and now I'm permanently in another world"... was there? But I'm not really thinking about those shows because I have seen neither, we're talking about Lamuness, a series aimed at kids. There's a lot to unpack about modern isekai's penchant for escapism in a Japan that's settled into its post-Bubble Era woes, but I'm not qualified to talk about something so culturally heavy nor is it super related. But I do wanna touch on the "method" of being spirited away into another world, and the story structure.

Like I said, it's anything but permanent. There's no truck, no sudden heart attack from overwork. Come, Lamuness, time to save the world. There's no time to waste. Get in the fucking TV. The method is an incredibly accessible one, arguably: getting sold a shady CD-ROM for like a dollar and getting whisked away when it boots.

The premise of this series is very goal-based, and it would not be an exaggeration to say that even if the person in these kinds of older isekai in general comes to love the world and decides to stay, there is always the goal of "get back home". Lamunedo has the hefty weight of defeating the demon god's henchmen before they revive him, and when it all ends he gets to go home (sorry for spoiling an anime that's like 25 years old at this point, but that's how most of these ended). In contrast to newer isekai shows where the story begins with the protagonist's life ending, cementing that this is their new life and that they have no real grand goal... unless the goal is to not die. You have to live your new life, effectively an escape from the old life lived previously. The protagonists often skew older in their original lives, office workers over the age of 20 or NEETs who have wasted their lives and what have you. The issue with a lot of newer isekai media is not that they're paint by the numbers, but that because there isn't much of an immediate goal in most, many cannot deliver on the breadth of the premise or many would consider a gimmick. They drown in trying to tick boxes of "you should know the genre the protagonist is stuck in if you've picked up this book/manga/anime, so I'm not gonna think too hard about it either". It's not a diss or anything, but if your protagonist is just going to live and adapt to a new world and you make it the entire premise then you better have thought of the world building at least a little, or give it an actual plot structure to follow that isn't just you going through a buffet table and piling on more cute girls/boys/etc onto the protagonist's plate. They overwhelm with technicalities like video game stats (STOP!!!!!!! STOP PUTTING STATS IN YOUR SHIT I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF AND YOUR NAME WILL BE IN MY NOTE) and are indulgent in a lot of the wrong ways that may alienate those who do not consume the inspiration of the isekai much.

The best isekai that don't get immediately lambasted by the audience are isekai that dive right into the story without treating the outsider protagonist like someone standing behind the fourth wall at all times, and the rest of the world actually matters. Drawing attention to the fact that other characters are NPCs is tiring and makes me think I'm not supposed to care about them. It creates a vacuum where the only real person in the story is the protagonist and it's difficult to feel for a protagonist when everyone else is treated like an object. Both a literal object to interact with in a video game sense and in many cases a sexual object. Most good isekai will have you forget that the setting is based on something previously assumed to be fictional. It's not enough for the protagonist to be invested in the world, by the way. That's why shit like Shield Hero sucks ass even when you ignore the slavery shit (why would you though?!). I find that I prefer when it seems like the protagonist is in the story just like everyone else, rather than someone who consistently pushes against it. Of course there are many different ways to do it. This is a topic that's way too deep for me, and contrary to what my tone may convey I think that the genre is painted with an unfair brush so a lot of good shows slip through the cracks.

Or to be honest... the fact of the matter is that people are biased and judge stuff harshly just because they're a genre that's in vogue right now. Go figure. <-guy who hasn't even watched that many newer isekai shows

I'll make myself clear here: both old and new isekai are escapist fantasy and I dislike it when people try to paint escapism as a pathetic thing that only the NEW bad isekai shows employ. What's more escapist than being sucked into a video game and being told you're the hero that will save the world? You, a normal kid. What I find refreshing about the Lamuness series that I think newer light novels could learn from. There isn't any "I'll use my experience from the old world". Because Lamunedo is a child, and hero can never be an adult.

So that's a modern isekai shorthand immediately eliminated. (Note that I haven't once called anything a cliche in this post, I don't have that kind of scorn for the genre. I think it'd be good for actual critics to remove this buzzword from their vocabulary unless they truly face off against something that is an actual ripoff, because people have now taken the word cliche and turned it into an entirely negative thing, same with the word trope. But I digress.)

The entire point of the series is to be an escapist fantasy for little kids who love RPGs, but you'll never once see a stat block nor will you hear much of bosses in the video game sense. Sure, maybe the tyke will wonder about home every now and then but after this point you're set off into the story with the express goal of saving the world. There's nothing deep to think about. Traversing through different "space"s and RPG village-like places is a given, and it seems like they're made up as you go unless they're on a map explicitly (they are supposedly, but they still feel made up). You won't hear much about what Lamunedo thinks besides the fact that his (and Da Cider's) BIG COOL MECHA has his blood pumping.

This is what I mean by goal driven: it ironically feels much more like a video game without constantly bringing attention to the fact that it's supposed to be a video game. A big greater goal punctuated by smaller goals and pitstops is how a lot of JRPGs progress. Perhaps it's prescient to compare a lot of newer isekais to an open world game: you're doing... something, there are story important cutscenes, but you meander around until you hit them and often you are sidetracked. It works when you're the one doing it, but when an isekai story is overwhelmed by the lack of nothing it is accomplishing that's when the audience disengages and starts wondering why the protagonist is a fucking idiot, and why they won't do something that actually matters. Have you ever watched someone dick around in Skyrim? Unless you really like Skyrim in my opinion it's not very fun to watch.

I find that this is why villainess isekai is so popular. Many employ the otome genre, which are much more linear in comparison. Sure, you make choices that lead you off to other routes and affect what ending you get, but everyone who plays Norn9 for example is playing the same Norn9 that the next person plays. Even with linear RPGs, you could be underleveled, you could favor certain characters, your experience can still be somewhat varied. Therefore, in a villainess scenario where the base is an otome game, there is an enforcement of an in-game clock where events will happen regardless of how much you dawdle. In fact, slacking tends to be punished. I'm aware that there are similar premises that don't employ a villainess or are based on other genres that are associated with women like management sims and mobile games, but in general they tend to emphasize proactiveness (also I'm speaking very broadly). Even the characters are treated with care. Sure, the heroine may casually spoil their supposed fate and metagame with previous knowledge, but they feel like actual characters.

In any case, as I've stated several times I carry no ire towards the genre. You'll catch me dead before I watch crap like Mushoku Tensei and Shield Hero but there's plenty of isekai manga and anime that I've either enjoyed or am looking forward to enjoying, past or present. But rewatching the Lamuness series got me thinking a lot about it. I wasn't even intending on writing most of what I wrote and I'll be honest when I say I don't consider myself a writer: I'm not the most eloquent and I struggle to express how I feel but by god do I express.

#general thoughts #cullen rewatches 40 fire #isekai #any comments feedback and reblogs appreciated :pleading: #anime essay #essay #isekai is such a fascinating genre even though i dont have much exp with it

[maybebecomingms]

a decade of repression

February 18, 2024

Lately I've been fixated on this memory of silently sobbing in the dark surrounded by my ex husband and his family. I didn't make a sound so as not to wake anyone up, and I did my best to breathe through the full bodily contractions so I didn't move and cause him to stir inches away from me.

It was February 14, 2020, and everyone had turned in for the night after his brother and his new wife eloped earlier that day at the courthouse. I have no clue why we split a room with his parents and grandmother - we didn't need to save money that badly to completely forego privacy. Anyway, I was never comfortable at a single family gathering of theirs, and I'm sure I was exhausted from another day of heavy masking. I'm sure I was drunk, too. It was the only way to cope.

But mostly I was feeling sad as the day drew nearer to The Dark Day, and I didn't have any outlet. Nobody cared. Now was not the time. That was a long time ago - everyone else has moved on.

I haven't talked much about my dad's death here - after all, that's not why I made this blog. But you can't separate me from this thing that has happened - it's a part of me.

The morning of February 16, 2014 started normally. We made our way to church and stopped for sandwiches after. While in line waiting for them, my ex showed me a text on his phone from my mother: "Please come here when you can." We'd had our phones on silent during the service, and I opened mine to find several missed calls and texts, too. I tried to call back and find out what was going on, but no one would come out and say it - it's not a thing to tell someone over the phone. I knew right away my dad had passed. None of the calls or texts were from him. Seeing the county sheriff squad in the driveway upon arrival confirmed it for me.

The following week was hazy as we wrote an obituary and planned a funeral for someone whose cell phone was still on and ringing, for someone who was feeling under the weather but still went to work the other day.

My world just sort of stopped. But life goes on, and mine did, in a slow and disjointed kind of way. I didn't really talk about it in any sort of meaningful way with anyone. Many church friends went *poof* (which is super common if you ask any evangelical who goes through something difficult). And I couldn't ask my family to accommodate my feelings. They were going through it, too, and my job was always to take care of everyone else. Even now - that's not an option. My ex tried to understand and empathize, but he simply couldn't, and eventually I could tell he just wanted me to "get over it." A few older adults with some perspective tried to get through to me, but I wasn't in a place to receive it. I even went to grief counseling two years later, but my therapist was so busy trying to convince me that having a baby would fix my grieving that I didn't really get to work through said grief.

It was very isolating. Sure, I knew of people who had lost parents to prolonged illness or an accident. I didn't bother them, though - I didn't want to stir anything up, and I wasn't sure they'd get it. My dad was sick with pneumonia, yes, but nobody thought he'd die when he did. He died of natural causes, in his sleep, like you might expect to happen to someone decades over. He had chronic illnesses society nonchalantly calls "lifestyle diseases" and yes, a series of poor lifestyle choices caught up with him. Those poor choices impacted me for most of my life, too. How do you even explain that to someone?

My partner also lost his dad when he was in his late 20s, and both of our dads were 58 when they passed. It's not my story to tell and it wasn't an identical situation, but it was weirdly similar in a lot of ways. I've always thought no one could ever possibly begin to understand this thing and the complicated dynamics surrounding it, but if anyone does, it's him.

We didn't exactly talk about it at great length this weekend, but we did go visit. Mid-February in northern Minnesota typically would NOT be the time to go to the cemetery, but this winter is anything but typical. It was actually the first time I've ever gone there and found the grave by myself. I wasn't even sure if I'd be able to do it!

But I did, and it felt like the right thing to do after a decade of holding back at all costs.

#death #grieving #death of a parent #cemetery

[last-night-is-a-blur]

A Charmed prequel.

We start with Melinda Warren as a young woman. She tries to fight even with guidance from other witches and has to learn things on her own through trial and error.

Her mother is her only ally and confidant.

Later she meets a young girl who is a witch, that grew up in a coven and teaches her a lot of things.

Melinda also has a friend (lets call her Patience), who is mortal, and she occasionally helps Melinda fight demons, but doesn't know that Melinda is a witch. She just knows that Melinda has a knack for finding mysterious things, and has a strong urge to help people. She keeps on getting herself involved as well, out of desire to help, and concern for Melinda's safety.

Patience doesn't tell anyone about their supernatural adventures, since she is afraid people won't believe that they are fighting demons and warlocks, not allying themselves with them.

Eventually Patience finds out, and struggles to accept this, but can't bring herself to turn Melinda in, and eventually they reconcile.

Meanwhile Melinda befriends and starts falling for a mortal man. For various reason (including Melinda's fear of him finding out she is a witch, and not wanting to marry someone she would be lying to about a big part of herself, and his family not wanting him to marry a woman born out of wedlock). Eventually Melinda reveals the truth to him. He accepts her, after first being angry she lied to him or something.

They get married, have Prudence. He dies.

At some point Melinda ends up in Salem and starts dating Tate.

We see the start of the Phoenix assasin witches.

The atmosphere of the show is filled with paranoia and spookiness. Especially as the Salem witch trials begins.

After Melinda's death, there is a flashforward to when Prudence is older.

Prudence lives with a mortal woman who took her in.

She can slow down time. Her foster mom knows she has powers, and forbids her to use them. Knowing what happened to her mother, and growing up believing witches are evil, she fears her powers, and hates herself.

Still, when she sees someone in trouble she uses them. But after that instance people become suspicious of her and she has to run away.

She ends up in Wellfleet where she meets Mary Hallet, who teaches her that witches aren't evil and to accept her magic.

Prudence also meets a male witch and the fall in love. They dislike each other at first, since she finds him cocky and promiscious, but they eventually become friends and fall in love. They get together after some initial troubles. Not sure if they should have kids, or if that would be weird, since if the Halliwell line was descendent from another witch line besides the Warren line it might raise question of why that wasn't brought up in canon? Though it might explain why two of the 20's cousins had different powers than the ones Melinda passed down.

Prudence crosses paths with pirates, slave trades, pirate hunters, sea monsters and ghosts.

While Melinda's story is all about spooky forests, and paranoia, Prudence's story is more of a pirate ghost story. The Flying Dutchman and such.

#charmed #melinda warren #salem witch trials #salem witches #warren witches #the warren line #halliwell family #power of three

[alteredsilicone]

The Dark Urge : Act I

A long ramble about my Dark Urge playthrough, split up between acts since this game gets meaty.

This is my third playthrough so more or less I knew what I was getting into (had some durge story bits spoiled too).

When I set out to play durge I also wanted to do an "evil" playthrough, so I set some goals: embrace the "big" durge decisions, be evil when possible without going full murder-hobo. Ally with Gortash, dominate the Brain. Make SH a Dark Justiciar, ascend Astarion, romance Minthara, push Gale towards Godhood and help Lae'zel stay loyal to Vlaakith. The results were... varied.

Recruiting Minthara meant the tieflings had to die, so I indulged the durge by watching Arabella die. Surprisingly this way the game guilt trips you less about doing bad things. (The guilt tripping aspect I will bring up at the very end, after my Act III retrospective)

I quickly learned why durge x Astarion is a popular ship - he really jumps on you from the very beginning, a total 180 to how he treats Tav. Anyways, he wasn't my romance goal so I let him be. For a while.

Alfira is one of my favorites, but she had to go. Sorry. I know there is an alternative by making a different NPC appear but I wanted an authentic(tm) durge experience. Besides, Alfira would die in the grove massacre anyways, two birds with one stone and all.

Dream Guardian interlude - I made her look like my first version of Viri, so it's a Viriception.

Since I'm collecting all the "evil" choices, I also decided to indulge the tadpoles. Partly for achievements, partly to see how it works. Truth be told I didn't use the tadpole skills too much, so if I replay durge (I might do for certain different story outcomes), I will ignore the tadpoles altogether.

Sceleritas Fel was an excellent addition, obviously I humored and indulged him since I wanted to be papa's most specialest murderer.

As I was allying with the goblins I explored some stuff I didn't previously - got shackled up by Gut. Escaping her was quite easy, just had to avoid her afterwards. Then I rushed to Minthara.

I love Minthara's character a lot - she stayed in my party throughout the whole game. Needless to say, but I killed Karlach for Wyll (and stupidly didn't get his armor because I forgot to put him in my party, oh well), Wyll left me when I attacked the Grove (I assume he died offscreen or I killed him without noticing) and I never even met Halsin so he also just died offscreen.

I could also rant about the whole "evil playthrough cuts you from 20% of the content" aspect, but that is a tired rant. I don't mind the grove massacre being the price you pay for Minthara joining your party (she IS an evil character, she straight up agrees with all evil actions together with Astarion and is totally on board with dominating the Absolute and becoming rulers yourself), I just wish there was some alternative with playing on the more evil side.

Maybe befriend goblins? More drow? Anything, really? Then again, BG3 is already a massive game... Oh well, you can't have everything.

Anyways, now that I have done the first big quest, I went to the Underdark to try out one specific thing:

What happens if you sacrifice Gale to the fish people before Elminster stabilizes the orb?

He aggros, you kill him and then after two in-game days this happens:

Needless to say, I reloaded a save and just humored the fish people without killing Gale. Besides, for a corruption arc he needs to live. This is also why I only indulged the "big" durge reactions...

My personal philosophy is that being a murder-hobo is a boring way to be evil (death is not the worst thing that can happen y'know), I much rather would corrupt characters.

However, another part of me got curious about one thing: if you bite off Gale's hand when you find him in the portal, can you present it at the murder tribunal in Act 3?

Anyways.

Remember I said Astarion really gets the hots for durge? So, Minthara leaves for Moonrise so she isn't in my party at the moment this happens... durge decided to have some "fun".

This sequence was very corny, but I know it's all part of Astarion's play-pretend so I just let it play out. Spoiler alert - I will friendzone him later (for his own good).

I decided to feed durge the Noblestalk to get some memories/lore. I hoped for more but probably getting everything back in Act I would be anti-climatic, so this was a nice tidbit all the same. Also the environment bugged out, I should be in a dark dank cave, not outside.

Gale also decided he likes me. I promptly friendzoned him. Trust me, Galey, you do not want a romantic adventure with this tiefling (also he is soulbound to Nila, my other Tav, can't have him cheating on his wife...).

Anyways, Gale is a funny case because Larian keeps mucking up his romance flags, I couldn't replay his romance scene with my actual Galemancer Tav, but the romance does trigger later in Act I when you farm some approval (so either in the Underdark or Creche, depending which path you go on). But it also bugs out (I had to long rest twice with my Tav as the first time it triggered tiefling party dialogue before promptly cutting out, probably a bug because it was an old save where the romance SHOULD have triggered during the party).

Anyways, moving on. I am jumping over some zones/quests because nothing particularly interesting happened (I helped the Myconids but I do that always so that's that, though I let Glut die while fighting the Duergar, not on purpose he just got felted, sorry big guy).

Siding with this guy has exactly zero payoff (Act II spoiler - Balthazar turns him into a zombie and that's that), which is another evil run gripe. He is like Minthara where you can convince him to go against the Absolute, but instead it just goes nowhere apparently.

I just sided with him and suffered through killing a bunch of gnomes and Duergar. Well, at least I got some new scenes.

Astarion flirting interlude:

I put this here because the durge evil face is just so funny. These two would make a disaster pair, but, alas, we in this house are women-loving-women.

So, remember me setting out to push Lae'zel towards loyalty to Vlaakith?

I went as far as to stab the Dream Guardian...

Obviously I should have known better, because the Guardian has plot-armor for obvious reasons. This game kinda sorta railroads you to go against Vlaakith/side with the Guardian. Otherwise the game would just end for obvious reasons... So I decided that I might just shelve Lae'zel along the way.

Maybe I should have made some other decisions in later acts (like killing Voss), but I had my companion-squad already with me, so I decided to let it go.

And that concludes a "brief" overview of durge Act I:

#bg3 tag

[not-poignant]

Hi Pia

After reading your response to the Vane anon, I'm curious to know...

What would have happened if Gwyn had been defeated and captured by Augus instead of the other way round?

What would've Augus done to him? And would Augus still have fallen in love with him eventually?

And how would Ash have reacted to the situation of having a poor 'Seelie' king imprisoned by his unhinged brother?

I know you don't tend to know what happens in your stories until you write them but I'd appreciate some of your hypothetical thoughts :)

Hi anon!

I think I've actually answered this question around 20 times actually, years ago, since it got asked all the time back when I was writing Game Theory! But I can't find any of those responses because Tumblr's search is so incredibly broken, so now that I've spent 30 minutes looking for the old responses, so I'll rewrite them here and hopefully be able to find this one day in the future! (not likely, please fix your search, Tumblr):

If Gwyn had been defeated and captured by Augus, Augus would likely have killed him.

Unlike Gwyn, Augus didn't have any lingering feelings of affection towards Gwyn and he never developed an infatuation after the events of Deeper Into the Woods, he didn't feel like he owed him anything in that regard. He was also like...insane. At most he might have raped him and tried to break his spirit, through mocking and humiliation and degradation and torture (after all, Augus wasn't sane at the time when he was destroying kingdoms and defeating people, he sort of needed 6 months in a dark room to sort himself out, and he would never have gotten it if he defeated Gwyn).

They wouldn't have fallen in love. Gwyn would have died or killed himself or killed Augus. (Gwyn is nearly impossible to defeat, but in the rare instance it happened, Gwyn would still likely kill Augus. He's been captured and tortured before, and his light can kill anyone, I'd say he'd last as long as his lingering feelings of affection remained and then once they they were fully broken, he'd murder Augus and destroy the Unseelie Court and then probably himself, because the only person who ever saw him for who he was loathed and tortured him, lol.)

I love Ash, but he can be a coward. He couldn't directly stop his brother, so he sought to betray him in an underhanded manner (a betrayal that Augus and Ash have only just started to recover from in the canon, around 20 years later). So I don't think Ash would do anything at all if Gwyn was captured, I don't think he'd visit Gwyn (they were never affectionate and Ash doesn't like him for a long time even in the canon), I don't think he'd do anything more than 'Augus, this doesn't seem like a good idea' and then he'd go to the human world and get drunk and use drugs, which is how he mostly coped with Augus' descent into madness in Game Theory as well (Gwyn does, after all, find him extremely drunk in the human world, deeply in denial about his circumstances).

Tbh, even Game Theory was supposed to have a tragic ending. When I first started writing it, I was literally only writing it for the hatefucking in the beginning. I fully expected that Gwyn would in his sentimental way come to love Augus and release him, and Augus would die, and Gwyn would be killed for it, and Augus would never fully return his feelings and manipulate his way out. It was meant to end in about 7-8 chapters. Like, I literally set up so many things to stop them from liking each other and succeeding that the story took an awfully long time to w rite and 'solve' what I'd put in place.

But as a result of that, it means there's almost no other options in this particular universe where they can have a happy future.

If Augus defeated Gwyn, they'd all be dead by now. Or alternatively, we'd have a new incarnation of the Each Uisge and the Glashtyn, and Gwyn would be back in his Kingdom, spirit dead, and Crielle puppeting him for the convenience of everyone.

#asks and answers #gwyn ap nudd #augus each uisge #game theory #deeper into the woods #fae tales au #fae tales hypotheticals #hypotheticals #literally every version of it doesn't end well #because augus was literally insane at the time that he was interested in defeating gwyn #and that version of augus #had pretty much nothing good left to give #and certainly would have appreciated having someone to destroy #even after 6 months of psychological time out #he *still* initially tries to manipulate gwyn and take advantage of him #but yeah that hypothetical is 'how to get augus and co murdered' #it's horrendous to think about because crielle and efnisien would live in that universe #likely efnisien would end up on the seelie throne eventually #dlsakjflsakjfsa #p sure back then i didn't give much thought to the fact that efnisien and crielle would take over #but yeah they totally would