#he'd go back to wanting to be normal

[cerise-on-top]

Hii you know how you wrote about reader getting hurt because of their job please could you write that with graves or nikolai x

Hey! Sure I can!

Graves’ and Nikolai’s S/O Gets Hurt Because of Their job

Graves: On the outside he may seem calm and collected, but on the inside he’d be seething with rage. However, he won’t show you how angry he actually is, keeping it all to himself instead. He needs to be the big, strong man in your relationship, so he needs to keep his cool in front of you, no matter what. I don’t think he’d be too surprised you’d have gotten hurt, though. While he may have hoped it would never happen, that was just wishful thinking. You’ll either be on Shadow Company’s medbay or in the best hospital he can find nearby. Either way, you’ll be well taken care of. If you’re at Shadow Company, then he’ll station some of his most competent and trusted people to take care of you for the time being. You will be protected by them, and you will get whatever it is you may need from them as well. Or anything you may want, really. No cost is too high for Graves while you’re in recovery. While he may try to make time for you as well, he really does, he will also have someone track down whoever hurt you. This person will then be abducted to Shadow Company for a rough time. Graves himself would take care of them, and he can be pretty effective when he wants to be. However, if you’ve recovered by then, and are among the more vengeful people, then you’re more than welcome to do as you please with the bastard yourself, Graves has no qualms about that. In fact, he’d welcome you doing what you need to do. An eye for an eye. I think he’d become a bit more protective of you afterwards. If you’re okay with it, then he’ll leave you in the hands of some of his Shadows since he can’t always be there for you. If it was up to him, he’d combine you with his work and have you just live on base with him so he could always keep an eye on you, but you likely wouldn’t agree to that. It may seem a bit overbearing, but he will reach out to you more often and does expect you to respond within a few hours, or else he’ll get worried and send someone to check up on you, even if you’re alright.

Nikolai: While Graves may be furious, Nikolai is entirely calm about all of this. Yes, you got hurt, but seeing him panic would likely only worsen the state you’re in. He is well aware of the fact that you will pull through, he made sure of that himself. However, he won’t do anything drastic until you’ve recovered completely. That way your perpetrator has enough time to kill themself before he has to take action. Naturally, you mean the world to him, so any violence against you will not be excused. Nikolai runs a PMC, so he knows what he’s doing, he knows how to deal with violence. Violence for violence is the rule of the beasts and Nikolai’s cruelty is akin to that of a starved animal. However, that can wait until you’re alright again. He’ll visit you every day, even stay at the hospital, and bring you gifts, tell you stories and keep you company otherwise. But he won’t mention the plans he has for the sorry fuck who hurt you, those are for him to know and for you to never find out. Once you’re home again, going about your day, he will seek out the bastard himself and drag him to some place in Siberia. As mentioned before, Nikolai can be cruel when he wants to be, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he let that person run aimlessly around Siberia for a few days, hunted down by him and his people, only to capture and torture them later. Death is a kind of mercy that is not for them, though, so he’ll keep them alive for the time being. They almost took you from him, there’s nothing they could ever do to make up for that. They’ll be a new chewing toy for Chimera until they die for one reason or another. Nikolai won’t get too overprotective, but he will be keeping a closer eye on you. He won’t station one of his people in front of your home when he’s away, but he will try to make more time for you. Calls become more frequent and he will try to find some excuses to spend more time with you, even if it’s just by video chatting with you when you have the time. He won’t freak out, but he won’t forget about that incident either.

#cod #cod x reader #phillip graves #phillip graves x reader #cod nikolai #cod nikolai x reader #I was thinking about wanting a request for Graves again not too long ago so this came at an ideal time #they're both very powerful people who are also war criminals and not afraid of breaking every law in existence #so yeah they'll have their fun with whoever hurt you #thinking about an angry Nikolai scares me so bad actually. he'd be so calm and quiet and that's just the most terrifying thing to me #if you're in an especially bad condition then I think Graves would become more strict with his Shadows #he knows he shouldn't be like that at work but he can't help it since he's just that worried about you #he's usually a fun and caring boss but he'd become very different when you get hurt #of course he'll go back to normal once everything is alright again but you being hurt would hit the Shadows pretty hard as well #I like to think he does talk about you to his Shadows so they definitely know who you are #and just by hearing about you most of them would like you as well. especially because Graves loves you this much and they like him a lot #so I think a lot of Shadows would also grow protective over you and I think that's so very sweet #I always liked to think that the people at Shadow Company were very close with each other #especially because Graves is a good boss and makes sure the work climate there is ideal. despite the war crimes #Graves is actually a pretty fly guy in my eyes. he's just cocky but he does worry a lot about his Shadows and you deep down #he loves his Shadows and he loves you too

[skunkes]

i have soooo much more i cld say abt him, and have explored more thru other doodles, but quick summary of talon's whole deal, which is subject to change still as he's only almost 2 yrs old as an oc

#oc text #obvs sparse description of the events bc i dont mean for it to be gratuitous #even if i decided to explore it further in some medium the focus wouldnt be gratuitous ykwim #not that there werent awful stuff within that but my focus with talon is also more exploration of like #even stuff that isnt a big deal (which it wasnt at first) can effect someone greatly #and then once it does get a bit worse the focus is still more on the effects of how he views himself and the aftermath #AS WELL AS LIKE. well. did i do this to myself? i went back. do i deserve this? #he's a lot like me and the reason i like the self insert dynamic is bc he thinks of cheye as Me If It Didnt All Go Horribly #bc ive not gone thru the Extreme but i have had interactions with ppl who very enthusiastically thought i was ummmm underage!!! #while they were already being creepy toward me and making me nervous abt my safety ! #so this isnt ''he's umm 400 but looks 12 bc i want to do weird shit with him 😏'' dude drawing him Fed makes me so sad sometimes... #we're also weird eating buddies <3 #and grief buddies <3 he actually further spawned out of my need to deal with a lot of family members passing away in such a short time #severe death phobia buddies... #i still dont know how he really feels about his Old Wrinkly Form btw all i know is he feels safe in it #as much as id love to sway toward ''he thinks he's hot like that. because he is.'' i also dont want to convey the wrong message wrt this #form being due to....disordered eating caused by Issues. ykwim #though! he can shapeshift quite well when he's fed and maybe he'd choose that form willingly if he ever got. Past everything #he does hate that he never gets to actually age...! he wishes he cld age normally like a mortal...(still scared of dying though) #but we cant knoww for certain yet ykwim. maybe he'll let me know soon. #my issue with talon other than i suck at plots is well he has too many of my issues. and. idk how to solve them. #he's growing with me. #oh and have we noticed he's mean to me when *im* being mean to me...MANY such metaphors #ok goodnite

[pixelatedraindrops]

"You've been through a lot... But it's alright now.

You fought long and hard Makoto...

Everyone in Kanai Ward is grateful to you."

A lil' MakoYuma comfort edit I attempted just because...

...someone needs to give this poor thing a hug fr... ;w;

show your emotions lil' CEO, you've held them in too long.

ty again for the vulnerable sadboi makoto sprite edits @shiut💕

#rain code spoilers #rain code #master detective archives: rain code #whumpcode #its angst/comfort so it counts idc #yuma kokohead #makoto kagutsuchi #makoyuma #my edits #pixeledits #yeah for my first edit in a while #I went with something soft #I want Yuma to hug Makoto so badly... ;-; #weird hug but its the best I could do lol #I love these two so much #did something similar to that one YumaYakou edit I did #lil foggy effect because its supposed to be a serene moment #much as I love whumping these two w illness... #I do want them to be happy no more sad times ;-; #AND NO MORE CONCEALING YOUR EMOTIONS #YOU WILL CRY AND YOU WILL FEEL GOOD DOING IT #also yes this is post game yuma #ROLE REVERSAL TIME #not the best edit but its hard to edit makoto #WHEN HIS HAIR IS CUT OFF FROM HIS SPRITE X-X #yuma's probably the only one who can comfort him tbh #given he trusts nobody else #I think Makoto would be a very silent crier #not long after he'd wipe his tears away going back to normal #but let him have his small moment for now <3

[taegularities]

some men are textbook villains fr

#tw religion? #kinda need to rant.. kinda wanna explain what's going on #some ppl are part of humanity but don't know how to be humane... like the guy i started talking to almost 2 weeks ago #liked him a lot bc he was funny sickeningly sweet mature and understanding.. until he was not #tl dr version is that we somehow drifted to the topic religion and i told him im not too religious and don't believe in superstition much #i was extremely respectful and even when he said that he does believe a lot i was like 'thats cool!! different people believe in different #things!!' and at first it was a normal convo until man went all psycho on me (after one damn week!!!) and started talking about how #id have to be religious in a relationship with him.. my dude i barely know your fav food can we not talk about relationships yet #but he says he doesn't even need a woman who cooks/cleans just someone who believes.. n im like i get it but i can't change myself like that #and then guy moves to marriage and is all 'well my entire family is religious' n my mom and sister (who's 16) would be putting pressure on #you n force you to pray etc.. and I'm like???? who can force anyone to a thing like that are u kidding #things escalate and my absolute STUPID ass tells him about my deepest fkn trauma to explain what made me abandon religion bc #life just never got better and this trauma remained for yrs... and he gets so angry that he says he wants to stop talking to me just to spam #me all day next day.. he'd keep messaging me switching between 'i still want you we shouldn't throw this away i have feelings for you' #AFTER A WEEEEEEKKKK!!! and then goes back to 'i wasted my time with you you were so unnecessary im in a bad mood bc of you' #even said 'you'll never find a guy with a trauma and mindset like this. i will find a religious girl but no one will love you like that' #and the worst thing is that he told his friends and mom about the trauma i had just to spite me.. note that he promised to never tell anyone #(and then still asked for forgiveness and for me to rethink whether we want to end this after telling me 473626x he wanted to end it) #(nothing even ever started you bitchass) #also note that his mom knows my mom n basically most of my relatives.. so i was here trembling for days fearing they'd get to know about it #mom somehow convinced her to not tell anyone bc it's important to me and very very fucking personal.. #but he harassed me all day - i wouldn't answer and he'd send 55 messages.. multiple missed calls like dude i got so fkn scared #my heart jumped whenever he texted he was so fkn aggressive and SO MEAN #'you just needed to adjust and we would've been okay' 'tell me are u gonna fkn be religious or not????' 'you ruined everything' kinda mean #i just :') it was the worst time and i don't think i've ever seen someone degrade me so much or make me feel this defective #but.. it's finally over. his mom called my mom and mine was like pls teach him some manners.. n since i couldn't and wouldn't text him back #and literally avoided whatsapp bc of him she ended it all for me and now it's hopefully done forever #anyway i saw jks gcf performance yday n him singing still with you put a genuine smile on my face.. ill stick to THAT boyfriend honestly lol #def gonna delete later #but ty for reading if u did <3

[sysig]

How is skeleton shaped (Patreon)

#Doodles #UT #Papyrus #Sans #Some redraws! I just don't feel like scanning the originals so they'll stay contextless for now lol #I apparently used to draw Papyrus' scarf/cape with a little squiggly bit down the middle of his chest as well :0 I think it looks silly now #The donk-pecks I was talking about! :D Give your sibling a family kiss ♪ As much as skeletons can anyhow lol #Papyrus was being silly and then leaned down fully expecting it lol - another thing smol and I do a lot haha #Sometimes doing the cat thing of headbutting for attention lol #Sad skele doodles! Oh no! D: Best boy is the saddest around </3 #I used to draw Papyrus' mouth as having teeth behind his teeth so I gave it another go - I think I'm good on it now lol I like his weird jaw #I don't know if I based the original eye-glows off anything specific :0 I wasn't as particular about my notes back then haha #He is still very fun to draw crying tho poor lad :') #Originally the second one of Papyrus with his eyes glowing had Sans comforting him with a forehead donk - even in this redraw! #But I got the angle wrong so I removed him and then had brainworms about it lol #Something something the player (the artist) controlling the appearance/experience and moving the pieces (the characters) around as they like #I already know all that! I've been metaphorically playing with dolls for years years years! It just never stops being weird #It's like being aware of my own breathing and blinking - it's ''natural'' and normal and there's obviously nothing wrong with it lol #There's just a level of awkward....Feeling surrounding awareness lol - intentionality! It's not like I can stop just because I'm aware of it #It's just so whimsical /neutral - if Sans had turned out how I wanted him to he'd be there comforting his brother! But because I... #As stated I have brainworms please excuse me lol #The level of weird feels between the various mediums is really interesting to me tho :) Being a player or reader or watcher or artist! #They all feel different - more or less in control of what happens to them and yet never fully without culpability hehe #Obviously as an artist it feels the most in control - even to my own empathetic detriment! (It's not that serious lol) #The difference between being a player and a reader is a lot closer than being a watcher tho imo it's like a spectrum of responsibility #Though that's kinda also just how I feel about media consumption in general lol - I guess one of those is technically media production #Anyway! Lol #I don't know where I got the idea that his hoodie is two-tone other than the separation of his pockets? #It is a cute design! Dunno if I'll keep it going forward just for convenience but I'm not mad about it lol

[hella1975]

just full force threw a shoe at my sister's face and when my mum got me alone after she was like 'you shouldn't clobber her. but i get it' 😭

#it kicked off today but in my defence she's actually proper in the wrong this time even my DAD called her a bitch and my mum is FUMING #baso my sister came into my work with her mate when i was closing the other day and all the staff GLARED at them bc of aforementioned #close so i was being v chill so everyone 1) knew it was my sister and not some customer coming in late and 2) her friend wouldnt be uncomfy #like that's the real kicker her i was being extra laid back FOR her friend so he'd feel more at ease. and one thing about me is yes ive #said countless times i have a rural accent but my mum also raised me to know when and how to speak nice if need be bc people are cunts here #so when im waitressing i speak nicely bc it's a stuck up restaurant w stuck up customers but when im with my sister? making a point of #being laid back? my normal accent came through. and her mate when i was gone said i sounded 'really [from the county we live in]' #which WOULD NOT BE A COMPLIMENT. it's baso saying 'your sister sounds local and chavy' without using such explosive words #and my sister LET HIM SAY IT. SHE DIDNT DEFEND ME. and she told my mum about it later bc SHE THOUGHT SHE'D TELL ME OFF #LIKE SHE DID IT TO SNITCH. THERE WAS NO SCENARIO WHERE MY SISTER WASNT BEING A CUNT. and my mum hit the ROOF #one thing she's rlly been big on is loyalty bc it's always been the 3 of us so when she found out my sister let him say that she FLIPPED #and this all happened last night and i only found out this morning bc i overheard them screaming at each other and turns out my mum #tried to keep it from me bc she didnt want my feelings hurt and IM pissed bc it actually did hurt more than i thought it would #like i KNOW what people say about my accent but it's a guy i know? my sister's been friends w him for years? i was being nice? #it's EMBARRASSING like i was clueless & friendly and turned around for him to be like 'look at this stupid local girl' like?? #and my sister did NOTHING? it just sucks so i STORMED upstairs when i found out and had it out with my sister #and she knew she was fucked so she did all 'im not talking to you i have nothing to say' AND PUT HER EARPHONES IN? #the way i RIPPED them out. got in her face like okay girl u think i sound like a chav ill act like a chav lets GO #and it just got really aggressive and i wound up grabbing HER OWN SANDAL and full force hurling it at her face 😭 oops #from close range too like i was already in her face so i basically just smacked her with a sandal DSHGJKSH #now we're sat in silence bc alas we still share a room. WHAT the fuck. insane tbh but it's a bit funny. im so angry rn i could KILL #hella goes home

[phoenixcatch7]

If there's one thing I like more than time travel it's crossover reincarnation, so.

Botk link reincarnated as Damian Wayne.

An incredible weapon master of all types, but especially prodigious with a sword - he was beating knights at the age of 4 and with his memories as intact as they get for him I can see that goalpost moving even further (probably with traps and tricks, a 3yo doesn't exactly have great bodily control).

He's an excellent survivalist, agile, strong, durable, cunning and creative. He can move like a feather in the breeze, strike from behind with ease. His first kill, an animal, did not stir him as it did the other children. With his poise, grace, skills, obedience, he ought to be ra'as' finest assassin in the making, a jewel in the crown of the league.

Except he never speaks a word. Half his targets escape unscathed. He skates by true punishment on the merit of his skills and achievements in other missions. Testing has shown it is not a physical deformity that prevents his speech, but not even talia has been able to coaxe a word from him past his second birthday.

It is a defect ra'as is growing more and more frustrated by, as each attempt to fix these two final flaws ends in resounding failure. Less extreme solutions are running dry.

Talia fears those solutions. Her child does too, she knows. For them, there is a possible solution, more extreme than anything ra'as would tolerate.

She sends him out of the league. To his father.

To Gotham.

#'gee phoenix that sure sounds like that dp x dc you're normally rattling on about' yeah lol I steal tropes and sell them on the black market #Anyway this has been slowly rotisserie-ing in my head for a while I just like shaking canon like a magic 8 ball #I'd love to explore how link would react to Gotham and how he might see getting suddenly dumped in a found family as the youngest #And how that contrasts with both his expectations in the league and his role as the saviour last hope of a whole country #Because that kid cannot have a modern interpretation of killing. Like monsters? Kill with prejudice loot the corpses. #The yiga might have a little more hindsight understanding and he never killed them anyway but zero hesitation blowing them up #And ganon is so far removed from the concept of 'killing is bad' because a) human??? Monster??? B) literally the problem #C) he's been killing people so it'd even out d) everyone wants him dead So Bad e) been killed already like a dozen times what's one more #I get the feeling he'd assign the same role to the joker like 'widely considered the source of all evil. 'died' several times and came back #personal source of absolute misery for several heroes. Killed many' = slay the monster. Straightforward. #Like yes link always chooses kindness and has a strong morality and Opinion on killing people it's just a lot would be solved #By hitting the joker until he stopped making life miserable for everyone and if that means permanently well that's kind of link's job. #And like with Jason the bats understand that a lot better than they pretend to. But that is a 10yo who should not be thinking like that. #I think it'd be interesting to see how that'd change their reactions to 'Damian'. Like he holds a very similar opinion to og and Jason he #Just goes about it completely differently. #And I'd love to explore the differences between two fictional worlds and how they can go from pretty much the most black/white morality #To probably one of the greyest areas while still holding near identical themes and methods of dealing with that. #Found family compassion as a weapon against evil and copious amounts of weapons and cool gear lol #Also link should keep the arm he's earned it. Reincarnating with all his memories knocked a few other things loose I'd imagine #Mostly because all the loz games I've played have absolutely altered the way I view any link and also I love referencing them. #Damian with telekinesis and infinite glue would be great. A tiny 10yo sword master choosing instead to drop a dumpster on you #In between hurt comfort link beginning to bond with his family and begin to speak and learn sign language from cass #There's also the sound of explosives and a small figure clinging to a flying door as it crosses the Gotham night skies #Speaking of cass I bet her and link would be great friends in this au. #batman #batfam #bruce wayne #loz au #Loz #loz totk

[woahajimes]

i feel so out of place

#im not #aaa #i cant balance school and a job #and my grades arent even phenomenal #and i have a gym membership and i rarely go but grad is soon and im not gonna be skinny and oh #yk what baffles me #listen when i got to ecuador july 5 i was like 115lb #up until like aug 15 i was 120ish and then all of a sudden i was 130lb?? which was insane to me #like i couldnt believe my eyes i was just like. listen if it were gradual id believe it but 10 in 10 days is that normal #anyways i only saw it once and i wanted to kms #we're back in canada and im back at 117ish but #i think i legitimately misread #or like idk the scale was wrong #but aughhh i felt so good in ecuador and here i feel like a loser like all the girls are so #listen i am not a loser by any means but ohhh the voices #also i have terrible anxiety like i need to investigate this #also anxiety levels are a lot higher in the US/CAN than other countries #like i went to ecuador and theres a lot less mental health issues but oh the men are polars #like theres a lot to work on yk esp w men like not the dynamics ive talked abt that before but i mean like the wya they view women even sub #like i was thinking abt my ex and how he'd constantly complain to me about this girl on the girls scocer team that was a 'whore' and #supremely 'slutty' and hed use all these horrible terms #like okay maybe shes flirty and sleeps around as you say but why would you speak of a woman like that #like it scared me a little bc hed be like genuinely angry too #so yeah #where was i #oh yeah i need to like get skinny #short torso wide ribcage ... #like bffr. pick one #at least i got a fat ass idgaf #its also 3am i feel terrible. ive been sleeping really good tho

[sodafrog13]

dread. dread. dread. dread. dread.

#anyways. #my roommate's been going thru it lately and i wanna be helpful and respect his need to go to bed early #but if you know anything abt me. i don't go to bed early. and i am up working late at night #and him not feeling well is making that infinitely harder bc i'm constantly worried abt waking him up #when i'm just like. trying to get my shit done. and it's a little tiring #and also a little lonely bc normally he'd be up fore me to bother him a little so now i'm just. sitting here in the dark doing physio hw #i'm just sad and tired and want to go back to bed but i still have work to do #the trash speaks #maybe delete later

[everliving-everblaze]

one of the reasons Fitz is my favorite character, besides everything about him, is that he's the character that shows the most growth in the series. Tam (learning to trust others again) and Biana (learning to accept her scars) I think are both significant, but the amount of growth Fitz in particular has shown since the first book is radical and definitely the most center stage. His perspective on the world itself has done almost a complete 180, and there are at least two significant occasions where he apologizes and learns from his actions. Like, he's just SO interesting to look at as a character because situations where his character is tested are frequent, and the way he acts in each of them shows a clear character arc. I'm obsessed with him.

#I talk about this a lot in the sophitz powerpoint (which I'm still working on!) but the character arc is entirely based upon sophie #and that makes his character so compelling too!! that he meets sophie and like.... #there are tons of bumps in the road but he CHANGES because of having met her #like I could go on and on (and plan to when I do that stream) but just. their relationship is the most compelling thing about the-- #series to me and probably always will be. #in particular if you want to know more about what I'm talking about #the point in flashback near the end of the book where he's going to kill alvar and sophie talks him down from it makes me go craazy #especially because if he'd killed him then before his memory came back.... then the neverseen's plan would have been foiled. #FITZ WAS RIGHT. FITZ WAS RIGHT. FITZ WAS RIGHT. FITZ WAS RIGHT ABOUT ALVAR AND NO ONE BELIEVED HIM #EVEN SOPHIE DIDN'T BELIEVE HIM #I'm so normal I'm so normal about this #kotlc thoughts with catherine #kotlc #fitz vacker #stan fitz vacker or perish

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

sometimes i get annoyed because the people around me are SO in love with space. but sometimes my friend stops talking mid-sentence because he HAS to look at the stars right that second and how can I be annoyed by that 

#username mention! #on one hand sometimes i want to talk about other things #on the other hand #seeing what's in my heart reflected on someone's face is soo wonderful #like looking in a mirror but only seeing your favorite parts #idk if that makes sense but #you know when u look at a person and yes they're a different person with their own thoughts and feelings #but also we're the Same #we're kin to each other #i would never ever say these words to this boy for fear of weirding him out #he probably would be flattered? but he'd hold it against me forever #anyways he spent a full fifteen seconds staring at the sky before coming back down to earth and being like 'OH we were talking im so sorry' #this is not a big deal this is such a normal interaction #but it just struck a chord with me #what WASN'T a normal interaction was him going 'i know your secret' in front of two people one of which i dont like #and im incredibly dense so it took me a while to figure out what the fuck he was talking about #im gonna just come clean to my friend group maybe so he can't hold that against me #OR im gonna start mentioning his salary in public if he continues being a lil bitch #cause i know that annoys him #actually no i won't cause its mean #(it's not even cause he makes a shitton more than us) but he needs to stop being fucking annoying #about things im ashamed about #or i need to just stop feeling shame #one of those #daily diary installment #im avoiding writing in my actual diary because. im trying not to be cringe about boys somewhere i'll see in the future #not this boy but a different one #mine #delete later #OK NO I GOT IT

[i-am-become-a-name]

human version the zoomies after reading my favourite fivetegan fic. gotta run around, scratch and bite the arm of a couch, bury face in carpet and scream. it’s 11 pm.

#there JUST SOMETIHNG BAOYUT SEVEN MINUTES UFYH I CAN"T COEP #random #i am like. this far away #from chewing on the vase of daffodils and snowdrops in front of the monitor #i am not feeling well brainwise. too much. #i think the sheer amount of stress over the past few days is getting to me. i need to go up the local mountain and scream. #like. friday emailed with hey you didn't get this job but interested in this one with us? then interview saturday and he said he'd get back #to me/not get back to me Tuesday/Wednesday then emailed me that very afternoon did i want a second interview monday. the last four days #have just.... been a lot. plus having to be Normal™ in both interviews on top of the general stress leading up to them. i should read some #more stuff that makes me absolutely batshit just to work off the sheer stress energy built up. draw lots of scrawly loose art. have a cry. #please. feel free to recommend stuff that makes you a bit insane.

[liebelesbe]

hhhhrrrggg

#my dad doesn't yell at me as often as my mom. but with her I can tell it's coming. my dad just does it out of nowhere #he asked me what I did today and he does that every day and even if I didn't do a lot he's like 'ok cool :)' and moves on #and today when he asked me I said 'oh well I went to uni-' and then he cut me off to yell at me #about how I'm wasting time and that I have SO MUCH TIME and I don't use it and I have to apply to an fsj until tomorrow #or he'll send an application for me to somewhere I really don't want to go blabla #and then he stomped out of the room. and 2mins later I could hear him coming back which usually means he's there to apologize #but he just yelled at me some more!! #and THEN 2mins after that he came back to apologize because he doesn't want to be angry and yell at me but it's just that I make him soo #angry he can't talk to me normally and he has to yell :( #like. ok dude. thx. yelling always makes me want to do what you tell me to do /s #doddie redet #is this because I didn't heat up dinner... (I made rice but I didnt heat up the sauce bc he took a nap and I had no idea when he'd return)

[lonelyquail]

OK SINCE I SENT A DOUBLE BEFORE here's another!! um since you've mentioned sk recently hows abt your favourite order of no quarter member??

HMMM I don't have a specific favorite of the oonq so I am going to be resorting to semantics to twist this to a character I like (dark reize is like. he was Going to be made the last knight. it counts. it counts.)

anyway I love him so much and no one understands this 14 year old edgelord the way I do. not even the guy who he's technically just his oc. he's MY oc. (he actually is I took most of my interp of him and put it into a separate au and put That into an oc so if you're ever curious where nico comes from its him).

anyway (slaps this bad boy) he has so many identity debacles and also a shitty mom and so many fun possible interactions that. never happen. so I just threw that out and made my own au where he sticks around postgame (circumstances vary, he either splits off from nromal reize, is part of normal reize, or Doesn't get turned back and just stays Like This) and gets to sort out his issues starring: Lingering Memories From A Person You Don't Recognize As You, Finding A Purpose When The Thing You Were Conjured To Protect Is Gone And Said Conjurer slash Parent Is Effectively Dead, and also Just Generally Experiencing Emotions And Not Being Introspective Enough To Sort Them Out So Instead Just Being Really Angry That You Have Them And Causing Havoc. I like him

#shovel knight is hard bc i keep wanting to hc them in like. modern scenarios #anyway in a modern au reize wakes up in the morning realizes his phone played infinite 80 times since hes last been on it and goes Ah ! #i think both of them would listen to sonic music #ive got a few fun interactions between him and shield knight in my brain being (shield feeling somewhat responsible for Him In General #and feeling really bad abt it while dreize is just for once actually Afraid of her because shes like. shes Like enchantress but Wrong) #and id assume at this point hes had enough actual existence outside the tower that he'd know his time w enchantress was Horrible for him #so its all a very interesting situation in my brain but id like to think they work it out. theres a lot of apologies to be said there #even if it Wasnt shields fault by most accounts #theres other fun character interactions in my brain like him + normal reize and him + spec postgame but thats the main one #though i also have a hc that once the tower falls the Tower Inhabitants^tm stick around but just kinda take it back #mainly i like to think that gall made a community garden #and i have a scenario somewhere in my mind of dreize going back and not Entirely knowing what to do so just kind of. ripping up shit. #and it turns into gall going (hey if ur gonna can u at least rip up the weeds) and it becomes a good way to get dreizes aggression out #while also getting to rant to someone a lot more introspective than he is in the process #funnily enough i kind of managed to roll back to this interaction because i made ocs out of my interps of gall and dreize #so this Still Exists in my head its just with morty and nico #yeah tag ramble over i like this kid

[sewerfight]

when I was around twelve I used to sit at the family computer and send hatemail to a white french dude named Jacques who was a self proclaimed communist on Tumblr. This was back in the day when you didn't need a blog to send anon hate. I had no real beef with him but I just didn't like his tone. used to send him "SHUT UP Jacques" periodically. and he'd answer every single one of my asks like "who is this?? show your face or I'll fucking kill you" and I'd be like "now now, that doesn't make sense, jacques" all haughty and he'd get so fucking mad at me. One time he posted a selfie and I sent him an ask claiming I was a psychologist and that his hair parting suggested that he wasn't a communist at all. and he took it deliriously serious and went off on a 2,000 word rant. I can remember going to stay at my grandparents over that weekend, so I didn't even respond to the rant until I came back. I could've chosen to end it there, but when I returned, I sent him another ask which was like "psychologist here again: if you were a communist your hair parting would be in the middle. evenly distributed. All behavioural signs point to someone who doesn't take their own values seriously." and he went ballistic. really swearing at me. all caps type beat. he never turned the asks off, btw. which always made me wonder if he didn't know how to, or if he didn't want to cause he was convinced he was fighting a war, and this action would ensure he lost it. anyway this went on for weeks until one day I completely forgot about him like he was some kind of childhood imaginary friend I'd conjured up in my loneliness. but yesterday I happened to recall the whole scenario, because my buddy was like "remember when you were twelve and I came over to your house, and you showed me on the computer how you'd been terrorizing this random French guy for days on end. And you were laughing like fucking crazy. and I said it wasn't funny because he probably had problems, and you were like 'oh.' and you looked a bit guilty for a second, but then you went and got a grapefruit from the kitchen and threw it out of the second story window at my kid brother, who was playing in the street, and then you started laughing again?" Well. when she put it like that, needless to say I felt bad. so Jacques if you're out there I'm sorry I was such a little shit. you had totally normal hair, and you only wanted people to share stuff. If it's any consolation I know every day of my life that I'm probably going to hell for the sick things I have done

[k1rishiki]

when i saw 'cabin in the woods in middle of nowhere new hampshire' bad i mean it. i have a 65 year old father from northeastern mass that's the only type of vacation i ever go on (if you're wondering what it's like it's like a modern day yellow wallpaper btw) . i know my cabins in middle of nowhere new hampshire. i've been to multiple with better wifi than i currently have. that says a lot btw.

#one of my fave cabin trips was one where i was on my period and don't do tampons so i couldn't swim and there was absolutely nothing to do #there and the only place phones worked at all was in this one building which was a common area (i don't use technology without a wall #directly behind me. this post brought to you by the children of helicopter parents gang) and closed for most of the day. so all i had to do #was draw. listen to the singular episode of tma i had downloaded in preparation for the trip (yeah that's what era it was) #(it was the bonus episode live show recording bc that's what had just come out). pace back and forth from my room to the empty room across #the hall. eat the bags of cherries and saltwater taffy we'd gotten at the nearest grocery store after we checked in. and peel the possibly #lead paint off the walls (in the room across from mine bc if it were mine i might get in trouble or something idk). #i genuinely blame this trip for making my maladaptive daydreaming 50x worse than it already was. also none of the doors locked. the cabin's #main door wasn't even a door it was just an open doorframe. our cabin wasn't even just us either. or that much of a cabin. it was more of a #long building with a doorway to the outside in the middle w like 10 tiny rooms on either side of it. bc of covid they didn't pack it in lik #they normally would and instead just put me and my dad on the far end of one side and then some other family on the other and thank god the #did bc i would've lost my mind otherwise. the doors that didn't lock included the bathroom. which there were two of in the entire building #btw. my dad slept with his door open the entire time we were there. the windows were just screens with no glass. or curtains. #and my dad spent the entire time having ditched me to go swimming. most of the times i saw him were accompanied by 'are you sure you don't #wear tampons' 'we could go borrow a kayak instead' (my dad has a long history of flipping kayaks) or 'you should totally use the outdoor #shower' (he has an unexplainable obsession with outdoor showers and he really wants me to use them. for some reason). the only times i left #the two rooms i was pacing across were mealtimes where i developed a tea addiction which still plagues me to this day. attending the talks #he'd been given the free vacation in exchange for giving. he didn't just decide to go on vacation (however secluded) in the middle of covid #on his own. yes my attendance at the talks was mandatory no i don't remember what they were about it's been 4 years and i wasn't paying #attention. and the one hike around the lake i got to go on. 0/10 i loved it but wouldn't recommend it to anyone. somehow my dad has had the #audacity to suggest going back up there to the same campsite several times and is surprised that i refuse to ever do that again. #that said there was absolutely a net positive and that's that i think i owe things falling apart between me and my groomer to that trip #bc it was the longest period of time i had spent not talking to them since meeting them and i was for the most part not thinking of them an #was focusing in where our interests differed. and genuinely i think it was a turning point for talking to them feeling like a chore and #not basing my schedule entirely around theirs so like . maybe i have rose colored glasses towards this trip nowadays #romeo.txt