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conchstellations · 4 years

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watching the 1990 LOTF movie!! my reactions:

hello all!!!! i was bored at midnight again so here it is: me watchin the 1990 movie, for the first time, hell yeah!!!!! here we go!!! its got the other movie to live up to, so im excited for a comedy lmao!! tl;dr at end if u want!!! its kinda long btw lmao

- castle rock entertainment??? piggy u better watch out bro

- fuck is that the pilot???

- k this isnt a big thing but why are they in water? the plane left a scar in the earth, they were on land.

- okay, again, me nitpicking. but idk, to me, they dont look 12?? maybe its just cause theyre all dressed up n that but they dont look like 12 yr olds to me like the last movie

- why tf does ralph (?) have a glowstick lmaooooo

- why are they all together. where is my conch. wher are my stupid ass choir outfits. maybe im not there yet and they have them, but i want my stupid cloaks!!! jack would not stand for this!!!

- why TF is the pilot alive???

- am i supposed to know whos who by now?? did i just miss that?? which ones ralph? which ones jack?? wheres simon???

- conch??? the conchs main job is to bring them together, and here theyre already together so???

- piggy already makin me love him gosh piggy is child

- okay so im guessing brown hair kid is ralph

- piggy protecting conch rights

- i do like piggys sass... very iconic

- okay whAT??? is that blonde kid supposed to be jack?? first off, jack has red hair. second off, there is no way in hELL THAT MY basTARD child jack merridew would let ralph win the election just like that??? wheres my choir??? wheres my c sharp???

- okay jack would for sure call piggy shitbrain nvm

- mY CHOIR WOULD NOT ACCEPT THAT SINGING.

- wheres simon????

- r they fuckin cookin lizards??? nvm look away simon pls dont be in this

- is thAT BITCH supposed to be Simon?? hes got a lot to look up to. also why the FUCK is the adult alive. taht ruins the whole purpose of the entire book

- was that a dream??? sorry im dumb af lmao

- alrght simon is kind of an adorable hild and he likes lizard maybe hes valid?

- idk.. for some reason this ralph isnt like, giving me ralph vibes?? hes just not bring like ralphish u know??

- now im getting a little bit more of our beloved lil bitch ralph..

- okay wtf is going on lmao

- “SHOVE THEIR DICK IN THE CONCH” had me laughing for a solid fucking 30 minutes. william golding who??? whoever wrote that line is the new icon

- ‘EAT SHIT AND DIE” okay wtffff im so confused but also vv entertained

- for some reason jack’s character is like 100% off, but also somehow 100% on point “thats exactly what i meant” like holy shit. like idk hes not jack but just sometimes he radiates “jack if he was allowed to swear and was less of a lil bitch” energy

- ok simon and lizard?? valid

- i swear to FUCKING GOD i will kill that child!!!

- im gonna cry. wtf. why would you kill his lizard. even this movie’s jack seems like he thinks thats fucked up and hes a psychopath. also, lemme say, at this point, i think most of the book characters would beat the shit out of someone if they were mean to simon like that, bc the choir were his friends, and ralphs tribe respected him, sooooo

- why tf is it simons job to take care of the adult that shouldnt even be there? liek wtf hes grieving asshole

- no fucking duh hes scared of everyone but simon i would be too

- honestly kinda glad they let ralph say fuck he deserved it

- “back off man im sick of ur shit and sos my gang” fuckin got em

- let me guess pilot dude is the new beast???

- honestly wtf is goin on lmao

- okay piggys actor actually made me sd when he was crying about his glasses so good job

- simon comin through with the glowstick. also, good job simon

- well at least the lord of the flies looks terrifying as always

- are samneric putting on warpaint this early?? bc i WILL NOT stand for that shit. i am a samneric STAN Ok??? they were two of the tHREE left when simon died who didnt become cowards and go savage. they wree LOYAL to ralph until they were LITERALLY tied up and FORCED to join jack, and even then they helped ralph!!!! so fuck u. samneric are better than that.

- oh simon :(

- im glad they actually kind of (?) shwed simon like with the pig head bc last movei it was just ike them flipping the camera from pig to si so idkk

- ok that was a pretty ralph move to bring up the fire 24/7 lmao

- piggytits?? tf

- simon with hus fuckin glowstick lmao

- awe, simon

- okay HOLY SHIT. the sounds of what i assume to be them fucking stabbing simon are horrific. and then that cut to simon’s fucking mutiliated corpse?? holy SHIT. like as much as im complaining, thats the gruesome shit i expect from this book. i was expecting them to shy away from it bc its so awful, but im SO glad they didnt, bc that gave me fuckin chills. finally, something i can praise them on. thats the lord of the flies i expect.

- i feel bad for ralph.. good job

- ok good. samneric came back. good job again.

- ok. nvm. the disrespect to my loyal children. alright.

- okay that child screaming as hes being whipped?? wtf.

- ok that line of piggy being scared that the russians will take them nad make them go into the olympics? gold.

- piggys laugh is so pure

- why the fuCK are they finding instruments lmao

- poor piggy

- did roger just wolf whistle at ralph what the fuck is going on

- holy SHIt this movie does not hold back on the blood. but, wheres my conch explosion?? if ur gonna show him getting hit u gotta show the conch exploding. although, the conch means like nothing in this movie lmao

- okay wow piggys dead body cool cool cool

- ralph fucking YEETED that kid to the ground lmao

- okay, ralph crying?? good acting

tl;dr/conclusion/my thoughts: hooooo boy so i see why everyone likes 1960 one better.

first, lets start with the obvious: why this isnt lord of the flies. because its not. if this wasnt telling me that its lord of the flies, i would think of it as that, really. first off, the conch. the conch represents civility, it brings them together. its important. when piggy dies, it dies, representing how all civility is now gone. i maybe saw the conch three times this movie. didnt do anything.

second, the pilot, captain whatever. the point of the beast to me is that they made it up. sure, the corpse was real, but it didnt pose a threat, it was simply a corpse. they made it into what it was, therefore proving that they are the beast. sure, the pilot here was harmless, but he grbbed a boy’s foot and was therefore making himself a possible threat. maybe its not a big deal i guess.

third, the characters. the point of lord of the flies is that they are rich kids who havent gone through anything. theyre the perfect, spoiled kids who havent done anything wrong. half of them are in choir. chOIR. in this movie, lets take jack for example. they said he stole a car and got sent to military school. no. the point of jack is that he was a perfect kid. leader of choir. he was manipulitive and got even ADULTS to trust him. its part of hs character, showing that this perfect choir leader kid went fucking insane to prove how literally everyone can be evil. also samneric???? the direspect!! they were loyal to ralph until they were tied up and FORCED to join jack, and even then, after roger like beat the shit out of them, they were STILL loyal. fuck you.

so those are the MAIN reasons why it wasnt lotf.

now, what i liked i guess.

the swearing was NOT lotf, and it didnt fit with the story, but ill admit that i laughed, so i guess thats a plus.

second, i liked how they showed the gore, i guess? sounds weird, hear me out. lord of the flies is a gruesome, violent, awful book. theres descriptions of death in detail, and im so glad they showed it. when simon’s body was there, literally torn to shreds? the shock of it, the true savagery you see that these boys murdered him SO violently, is amazing, because thats the essence of lotf. simons death shows how theyve lost all their civility, and showing such a gruesome corpse really brings that through. so good job.

and now, of course, the obvious: thats not the characters i pictured when i read the story. simon doesnt look like that, ralph doesnt look like that, jack doesnt look like that.

where did the choir go, too? forgot to mention that, and i think that also adds into the whole, theyre supposed to be perfect kids and then become savage thing. also, the choir was a group. they voted for jack and went with him for a reason.

so yea, thats that. dont know why people would read this lmao but thats my thoughts!!!! i just need to keep myself busy when i watch movies and to make sure i focused, i figured id just write down my thoughts as i went. if u wanna watch for free, look up lord of the flies 1990 google drive.

;)))) and yea im posting this at 230 am lmao why not

#lord of the flies #lotf #lotf 1990

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ilovemygaydad · 5 years

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part 4/? of punk!patton gets adopted by single parent logan

part one - part two - part three - part five - ao3 version - masterlist (includes asks and art!)

pairings: moxiety, eventual logince, background pining remceit, mentions of past thomas/female oc

warnings: patton angst, lots of emotions, panic attacks, anxiety, crying, food mentions, kissing, caps, swearing, possibly something else

***feel free to send me questions or comments! i’ll answer them to the best of my ability, and everything is tagged under “punk!patton au”

a/n: this chapter is a lot shorter, but it would have been SO LONG if i’d put in all the stuff i’d planned

so you know how patton was being emo at the end of the last part

yeah

so here’s the thing

it’s worse now

about three days have passed

and hooooo boy

patton is emo

he barely speaks, he reads during lunch instead of chatting with virgil, and he barely even glances at the poor kid

and virgil is so worried, but he doesn’t know how to bring it up

so after the final bell rings, virgil grabs patton before he can sprint out of the classroom and sits him back down

“what’s bothering you, pat? why aren’t you talking to me?”

there’s such genuine worry in virgil’s eyes, that when patton looks at him, he freaks out

without even thinking, he’s sprinting out of the classroom and disappearing into hallway traffic

and virgil is left in the classroom, staring at patton’s supplies

and he can’t help wondering

what did i do wrong?

because, obviously, if patton feels the need to run away, it must be something that virgil did

tears well up in his eyes, and his breathing starts to become ragged

he scoops up his own belongings and goes through his normal routine, trying to ignore the intense panic attack that he’s having

he somehow manages to get out to roman’s car and buckle himself up

roman looks over to virgil to ask how his day went, and virgil just crumbles

knowing damn well that they won’t be able to talk while driving home, roman moves the car to an empty parking space and parks

“hey, starlight. it’s okay. breathe. you’ve just gotta breathe...”

it takes a few minutes, but virgil’s breathing evens out, and he’s mostly just a sniffling mess

“hey, you wanna tell me what’s wrong?”

and virgil almost loses it again, but he manages to spit out, “patton’s upset, and i don’t know what to do, and i’m pretty sure it’s something i did wrong”

internally, roman’s like god damn that kid making my son upset again, but externally, he asks, “why does that make you upset?”

“because...” virgil stutters a bit. “because i love him, dad, and i don’t want him to be sad, especially not because of me”

and roman’s like oh, shit

because, like, yay virgil’s in love, but it’s with patton, and it’s currently bad news bears

“honey, how does patton get home?”

“the bus stop on main and willow”

“alright. how about you drive home, and i’ll meet up with you later. i’ll get us ice cream, and we can watch big hero six.”

“okay,” virgil says, and roman’s about to leave the car when virgil grabs his arm and attention again. “you aren’t gonna be mad at him, are you?”

and roman’s heart kinda breaks like, “no, honey. i’m just gonna try to get both sides of the story before i make assumptions”

so virgil lets him go, and roman makes his way to the bus stop

no one’s there yet, so he sits there and watches the cars pass, checking every thirty seconds or so to see if patton’s coming

and finally he does, and he’s got his hood up and headphones in, and when he glances up and sees roman, he mutters “oh shit” and is about to turn around because there’s no way in hell that he’s going to talk to the dad of his crush after ruining his friendship with said crush

but roman calls out, “wait, hey! I really need to talk to you”

and patton’s like

hnnnnnnnn

fuck

but he stops and sits down next to roman, curling in on himself because ew, emotions and shit

“okay,” roman starts, all serious, and patton’s internally kicking himself for not running away from the bus stop. “what’s up with you and virgil?”

“nothing” patton sneers, crossing his arms

“fine. you know that i can’t make you say anything, but i’m really trying to not hate you right now because i know that virgil actually cares about you as a friend, and i’m not going to hurt him like that.”

and maybe it was a bit of a manipulation, but roman was kinda at the end of his rope with this kid, and he really didn’t want virgil to be all fucked up because of some punk-ass kid he met on the first day of school and decided that they were going to be friends

“i... i have a crush on him, and i don’t know what to do.”

patton looks as if he’s going to cry, and roman’s dad instincts kick in despite his better judgement

“about what?”

“the crush. he likes someone else, and it’s so selfish to want to be with him when he doesn’t feel the same way, but everything i try to get over him fails. he’s so sweet and loving and kind, and i want to spend every second with him, even though i can’t.”

roman sighs, and reaches out for patton’s shoulder. “i think you should talk to him, patton. it’s not good for you to keep trying to hide your feelings, and it will put a harsh strain on the friendship you have with virgil.”

“but he doesn’t like me--”

“did he tell you that?” roman asks very seriously

“no, but...”

“then you don’t know anything for sure. it’s better to take the chance with the possibility of success than suffer silently and watch everything crumble. love has risks, and you can’t avoid that.”

and patton’s like

“gaH you’re right! i hate that you’re right, but you are.”

and that’s when the bus comes, and patton waves at roman as he boards. he watches as roman walks away and the bus goes on its route and is just pondering what roman said

so he texts virgil “meet me @ 6 at the park by your house. we need to talk”

and, like, yeah, he feels a bit bad about being cryptic since he knows that virgil gets anxious easy, but what else is he supposed to say

“hey, i have a massive crush on you, and i want to confess to you why i’ve been acting weird lately, and that’s it! come meet me at the park so we can make out/you can reject me horribly!”

like???

fuckin no??????

patton gets home around 3:30, and he works through his homework by 4:30

at five, he grabs an extra jacket, steals some money from logan’s wallet, and tells logan to just put dinner in the fridge for him because he’s going out

(logan trusts patton not to do anything bad. a couple dozen dollars go missing from his wallet every so often, but it’s not like patton has an income outside of the house, and patton’s been completely trustworthy so far. he doesn’t question it.)

patton takes the bus to a whole food’s and buys some gluten free cookies

(he has to ask a couple of the workers which are the best, and he finds some that seem reasonable enough)

he gets to the park ten minutes early, and he’s floored by how massive it is once again

he’d only been there about two times--both with virgil--and the place is just plain huge

there are multiple soccer fields and a baseball diamond and a small place for skateboarding and then a really nice playground

apparently, it gets a lot of use during the warmer seasons, but by mid-fall, it’s pretty much empty

hence why he asked virgil to meet him there

patton goes to the playground and sits on top of the monkey bars, holding onto the cookies and looking up at the sky to pass the time

“are you gonna be all edgy up there, or are you going to come down?” virgil’s voice suddenly rings out, and patton smiles gently

he swings himself so he’s hanging upside down from his knees, smirking right in front of virgil’s face

“and ruin my aesthetic? i don’t think so, pal.” he then holds the cookies out to virgil. “cookies?”

virgil takes them, and patton drops down from the monkey bars with surprising grace

patton finally takes a good look at virgil, and, like he suspected, virgil’s still wearing the clothes he wore to school and didn’t put a jacket on despite the frigid weather, so he took the extra jacket that he tied around his waist and wrapped it around virgil’s shoulders

“thanks, pat,” virgil murmured between bites of cookie. “what’d you wanna talk about?”

patton’s chest tightens as remembers what he’s supposed to be doing, and he gestures towards the small skate park

“let’s sit down on one of the tables”

so they do, and patton takes a few breaths before he speaks again

“look, virgil... the reason that i’ve been so weird recently is that...” he turns his gaze down at his hands so he doesn’t have to see virgil’s face “i have a crush on you”

“oh,” virgil says plainly. “oh...”

and patton realizes that roman was dead wrong--this was a horrible idea

“god, this was a mistake,” patton says, trying to force down the tears in his eyes as he slides off the table and starts walking away.

“no! no, oh my god, no, patton!” virgil rushes as he hurries to catch patton’s arm. “shit, patton, i’m massively in love with you.”

“...what?”

patton steals a glance toward virgil, who is smiling and teary and so, so beautiful

“i love you so much, and i would very much like to be your boyfriend.”

patton is astounded at this adorable boy that decided that he was going to befriend this weird punk kid on the first day of school. virgil, who is so soft and sweet and completely unlike patton himself, is in love with him

and virgil is just so happy that this once lonely punk boy is finally starting to feel comfortable in his own skin and get over his past pain. he saw the way that patton’s eyes sparkled when he was passionate about something, and he never wanted to be away from that light

“can i kiss you?” patton asks softly

“of course, you big sap”

patton leans in and their lips meet and it’s just

awesome

and neither of them cares that virgil’s lip gloss is going to smear or that it’s cold outside or anything

it’s just them, and that’s what matters

when they break the kiss, they stare at each other for what feels like an eternity before virgil breaks down in giggles

“what?” patton asks, furrowing his brow

“dude, you’ve got so much fucking lip gloss on your mouth right now. it looks good on you.”

patton rolls his eyes and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand “shut up, or i won’t kiss you again”

“heY!” virgil says indignantly, pouting and crossing his arms

“aw, you’re cute when you’re all pouty”

“shut up, or i won’t kiss you again!”

“okay, okay! stalemate!”

so they spend a little more time kissing because wow this is nice and new and weird

eventually, they need to go home, so patton walks virgil back to his house, kissing him good bye on the front step before they part ways

as soon as patton is a little down the street, virgil sprints inside and immediately finds his dad, tackling him

“DAD, PATTON AND I ARE DATING!”

roman gasps (pretending he didn’t have a very instrumental part in that confession) “aw, virge! that’s awesome! i’m so happy for you!”

patton, on the other hand, is much more calm about telling his adult about it

he leans in the doorway of the kitchen, where logan’s looking over worksheets, and simply states “virgil and i are dating”

and logan smiles because he’s really happy that patton is finally settling in in and becoming happy

“that’s nice, patton. if you don’t mind, i’d like to invite virgil and his father over for dinner on friday. it would be nice to get to know them more.”

and patton’s like “yeah, sure thing. i’ll ask virgil tonight”

virgil gets a text while he’s gushing to roman about patton like “hey logan wants you and your dad to come over for dinner on friday. sound good?”

and both roman and virgil are so fucking hype, and they say yes

so friday dinner is a thing

to be continued... part five

asks are loved and encouraged, and make sure to check out the amazing art people have made on the masterlist! 💖💖💖

tag list: @residentanchor @eeveeawesome @xionical @absolutesandersidestrash @stormcrawler75 @musikasworld @ironwoman359 @a-weirdo-with-a-computer @thegaypotatoroyalty707 @darkrainbow333 @ravenclawunicorn1 @noahlovescoffee @whymustibedraggedintofandomhell @romansleftshoulderpad @still-waiting-for-cookies @emounicorn2006 @lana–22 @angels-ofthe-sea @demonickittykat @lonelysoul43 @the-virgil-mary @five-second-cookies @noisywolfbatbakery @band-be-boss-blog @heck-im-lost@lamp-calm-sanders @patton-e @knightofbloodcancer @cloudchaser7 @really-sleep-deprived-nerd @era-eclipsed @khadij-al-kubra @anxiousmorality @are-you-really-sure-about-that @today-only-happens-once @notalwaysthevillian @backatthebein @sunshineandteddybears @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @emo-sanders-sides-loving-unicorn @dodos-in-damnation @some-lost-meme-boi @dead4sevenyears @spookyingarbageisland @the-poison-apple-of-art@radioactivehelena @the-melody-of-eliza @im-a-mess-aaaaaa @whycantihavemorethan32characters @broadwaytheanimatedseries @veryvirginvirgil @llamaavocado @unisaurioamorfo @caterpiller-tea @cornycornfriendo @simon-at-3am @calico-kiri

#m writes things #punk!patton au #logince #moxiety #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #ts deceit #sympathetic deceit #he isn't actually mentioned in this chapter but i feel like i should still tag it...

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nerd-bastard · 5 years

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ok so over the... /checks calendar, past five days i have managed to tear through act one of DQXI and hoo boy. hooooo boy.

i fucking love this game *_*

@flutiebear thank you so much for your notes, they were super helpful!! my thing with JRPGs is mostly the turn based combat-- i can get SO BORED with it, i definitely prefer ARPGs where i can button mash things to death. DQXI seems to have found some kind of sweet spot for me tho, where battles are just long enough for me to like. pick a strategy and implement it, and get satisfactory results. sometimes those satisfactory results are just Talc helichoptering an entire group of enemies to death in one swing, which scratches my ‘button mash them to death’ itch :D I definitely like the easier monsters and relaxing while i play too, i’ve literally failed exactly ONE boss battle and that was bc my initial strategy sucked, not bc i didn’t have the muscle to pull it off. and omg, THE NO’S. BEST TIP EVER, THANK YOU.

and, as per your request, thoughts! :DDD full disclosure, i watched a playthrough up through the MMA tournament before I got the game, so these aren’t exactly first impressions. tons of screenshots and rambling below the cut, RIP mobile users :(

OH and because I got it on PC, i literally modded it before I even fired up the game lol. found some nice retextures on the mod nexus and installed the orchestral music overhaul too, it’s nice. The retextures are Wild Side Erik and Chainmail Luminary, i love them and I recommend the hell out of ‘em. Just a heads up so folks know why my Erik and Hero look different :D

ALRIGHT I WAS TOO DISTRACTED TO TAKE SCREENSHOTS FOR THE FIRST PART UP THE TOR but: i love gemma and i would die for her and sandy, and so would Talc. also christ, slimes are the most adorable enemy ever, DQ did a good thing with slimes.

/NERVOUS LAUGHTER

horsey!! her name is Whisper and Talc loves her :D

so, initial Hero headcanons: Talc does not want to be a Luminary. He wants to stay in Cobblestone, and continue spending days at a time alone in the wilderness hunting for his family and culling monsters and riding horses and whittling wood and carving soapstone to pass the time. He knows he’s not Hero material-- he has to work too hard to hold his temper, and he’s too stubborn, and and and (he’s fine-- he just really wants to be like Chalky, but he’s a 16 year old kid who thinks good people ((like Chalky)) don’t have to try so hard to be good people, not a man with 60+ years of experience and time to mellow out. he’ll get there.) So Talc’s plan is 100% ‘Go to Heliodor, explain the situation to the king’s Knights and give them the pendant so one of them can go defeat the evil instead, then go home to Cobblestone.’ and well. We know how that turns out.

the most hardened, you say ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

THIS FUCKER. WHAT IS THIS FUCKER. 47 HOURS INTO THIS GAME AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT THIS FUCKER IS. ARE YOU GOOD? ARE YOU EVIL?? ARE THERE A BUNCH OF YOU, OR IS IT JUST FUCKING YOU FOLLOWING ME EVERYWHERE? TELL ME

THERE HE IS!!! THERE’S MY BOY!! <3_<3

In Talc’s defense, he was trying to open the jars, not smash them. yes i absolutely have to reconcile breaking into people’s homes and smashing their stuff with his character, he’s a country bumpkin who struggles to remember the concept of ‘private property’ and is so stupidly strong from rock climbing and swinging a greatsword around that is is a genuine struggle for him to lay hands on ceramic without shattering it. he’s a bit of a bull in a china shop, and it’s only growing up with Gemma that let him develop a reflex-bordering-on-instinct to be as gentle as possible with other human beings that, unfortunately, does not translate well to inanimate objects.

also... ngl, it took... a minute for that accent to grow on me. that accent, man. more like ‘those accents’ JUST PICK ONE AND STICK WITH IT DUDE

talc: you know those days when you’re like ‘this might as well happen, adult life is already so goddamn weird’

also, those SHOUJO SPARKLES. i will NEVER BE OVER THE SPARKLES.

holy shit i love Erik’s expressions and poses so much, he’s so fucking expressive (all the characters are, the voice acting and animation in this game has been a delight every step of the way, but i just. adore Erik’s in particular, everything he does is so endearing to me.)

ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS QUEST NAME, IT COULD NOT BE ANY LESS SUBTLE

little did he know what monster he had created

seriously tho i LOVE the crafting system in this game, it’s a good challenge and a little frustrating when one of the random events screws you up, but SO SO SATISFYING when you finally get your +3. also it works really well with my headcanon that Talc is very much a “show your love by providing the ones you care about with anything they could possibly need or want” type of person. he’s actually very good at anticipating said needs/wants and has a knack for giving his friends things before they even properly knew they needed/wanted the thing. he also has a tendency to...kind of forget that he can get things in return, and gets really flustered and happy when he does get something which also leads to a tendency to treasure and consequentially hoard small dumb things BECAUSE they were gifts.

this is where Talc’s heart starts to go doki-doki-- he's very much a people pleaser, if he can make folks happy it makes him happy. the little bit of trouble is it was pretty much the status quo in cobblestone, and a little bit taken for granted by the time he strikes out-- not by everyone, or all the time, for sure, but getting out into the world and getting a sudden influx of gratitude is like crack for him. Also Erik is Nice and Handsome and was happy to do all the talking in downtown Heliodor so Talc didn’t have to worry about it, so Talc now definitely wants to keep Erik. It’s also hilarious to Talc that Erik is clearly skilled with knives, and yet has zero clue how to dress or cook a rabbit-- he’s very determined to keep the city boy alive (watch me walk this headcanon back in a few days when i finally get his back story and it turns out he lived off the land for years)

oh man, my HEART, MY HEART. even knowing it was coming, playing through this part was rough, especially since now it’s my Talc running around the ruins of the one place he wanted to live out his days protecting. ;_; that was his job, that’s what he was good at and contributed to his home, except for the one time it really, really needed him. he’s more than a little fucked up about it, but it’s a big part of him really leaning into the Luminary role- he can’t stand the thought of it happening to anyone else.

this. this is kinda a big deal for him, after cobblestone. after learning people blame him for Dundrasil, and then feeling responsible for Cobblestone, he’s already starting to have tiny, niggling doubts about ‘oh shit what if i AM some kind of darkspawn??’ Fighting alongside Erik through the Kingsbarrow and getting to feel like he’s helping and protecting Erik helps, and then so does this.

it also plays right into his thing for doing justice-- which, he tries to hold Chalky’s words close to his heart, he does, and his vision isn’t the first time Chalky has had to encourage him to let grudges go. it was the main motivation for the vast majority of his pranks as a kid: make Gemma cry by telling her proper ladies don’t play at catching frogs and getting dirty? enjoy the frog hidden in a jar leaping out at your face, old lady. accuse him of being a darkspawn and throw him and his family in jail? hell yes he is going to help this thief steal your greatest treasure, and love every minute of it.

and now, to wrap things up bc this post is already way too long and i’ve got. the rest of act one to yammer about later:

YES

YESSSSS

YAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSS

in conclusion: this is a good game and a good ship and i already have 300 words of fic sitting in my gdrive <_<;;;

#dqxi #dqxi spoilers

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airris-fr · 6 years

Text

Lair Review - Limanya #141180 (Part 1)

@peacevine I’M GONNA VALIDATE THE HECK OUTTA YOU FRIEND

I’ve already yelled over your first four dragons before but they’re SO PERFECT I WOULD DIE FOR AGNIRATHA

Also, the fact so many of your dragons have nice fleshed out bios and matching fams?? I love it, I could stare at your lair for hours

Beat

“Some dragons pursue witchcraft in search of knowledge or power. For Beat, though, it’s all about the fireworks.”

moOD 🎆🎇

“That is not a metaphor, either: Beat really does make fireworks, although complaints from clanmates about the noise and burning smell have restricted her to only a few days on which she is allowed to do such.”

LET!! HER!!! MAKE!! PRETTY!! EXPLOSIONS!!!

I love how the inkwell tail looks on her, it’s great, it’s one of the most amazing pieces of apparel, 10/10 lOVELY

Haku

He’s so beautiful and his lore is so good and soft and that accent matches so well with that apparel and his colors and I am just wOW OKAY

(also he seems like he would have a very nice voice for reciting poetry or reading aloud and... that is 100% why I chose him ngl)

Leiv

Brown safari owns my gosh dan g heart holy dAMN, look at it!! Also I really want to like, cuddle her, it seems like she would give really good, soft, genuine hugs

Stars

“From Stars’ little brewing hut, it becomes abundantly clear when their favorite time of day is: scribblings on the walls that track the moon, a large window on the ceiling right above the cauldron (“for extra flavor”) and a sideways curtain of sorts to cover it up. Samples of practically every plant the Clan has found so far hang from the ceiling, and created-and-possibly-untested potions line the walls.”

I wanT TO CRY OKAY, this sounds so lovely and just... sjghdsjfhgjdkshgfkshajadfksf I am so gay for all of your dragons holy shit I just want to like spend forever with every single one of them

Aquean

I’m... what a good spooky boy I love and support his suspicious ways 100%

Sprout

I don’t even LIKE female spirals what is your lair dOING TO ME

Metal

It is so, so rare that I find a dragon who actually looks good in the Buffclamber Belongings but I love them and it always works sO WELL when I finally do find one!!! I..I just love all of the apparel you’ve used in this, it’s perf

“It wasn’t long until she had mapped out most of her clan’s surroundings. Nor was it long until it went wrong.”

WAIT WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO HER YOU BETTER NOT HURT HER I SWEAR TO GOd

“Of course, it’s inevitable that an explorer will, at some point, lose track of where they are. For Metal, this too was the case. All alone, lost, with no way to get home - there was only one thing she could do, then, and that was to keep pressing on. If she couldn’t find her old home, she’d find a new home, no matter how long it took.”

I’m not crying you’re cryinG sTOP LOOKING AT ME

Akatsuki

Everything about her is amazing: her apparel, her accent, her lore, 10/10 (also!! I want to cuddle her too, she dEsERVES IT)

Mirri

Do you hear that?? That’s me sobbing in the corner because I didn’t inTEND TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR ENTIRE GOSHDANG LAIR OKAY EVERYTHING MATCHES SO MUCH AND MY HEART IS GONNA EXPLODE

I”M NOT EVEN HALF WAY THROUGH PAGE 2

Furuta

this accent is my favorite one on the enTIRE SITE okay, it makes every single dragon it’s on look like a goddamn BOSS

“The Clan prides itself on the kind nature of its members. They are, with a few exceptions, trustworthy, reliable, helpful. Furuta is one of those exceptions.”

O FUCK I LOVE HIM IDK WHAT HIS DEAL IS BECAUSE I HAVEN’T FINISHED READING BUT i would DIE FOR This MAN okay

“He is an entertainer by nature, but only to himself. If others don’t enjoy his mischief, that matters little to him, if they suffer for it, that matters even less.”

*fans self* hooooo boy that’s uh he uh that;s

Kotori

I?? I want to cry a lil right now because I’m sure none of you care or would even know why but this girl is my Aesthetic to a goshdang T, alright?? like, if I had a dragon to represent myself in my lore, it would be someone like Kotori my heart hurts I love her so much

Mogyutto

“Mogyutto only actively goes out about two months of the year. In the remaining months, it is up to the other dragons whether they want to visit him.”

ME THO 👏👏👏

Grima

This is the most beautiful?? dragon? I’ve ever seen? Those colors are amazing, that lore is just *mwah*

I’M GONNA STOP PART ONE HERE, BUT THERE IS MORE COMING BC HOT DAMN YOUR LAIR IS AJHSFJKHSGJHSFG THE BEST

#airris talks #incredibly long post #you've been warned #I yell enough about fable and bai as it is so I didn't include them but just knOW I LOVE THEM TOO #<3

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efortmanteau · 4 years

Text

Mouth Dreams!

MOUTH DREAMS IS OUT!!!!!!

Neil Cicierega has produced another mashup album in the Mouth series, so it’s time for me to do a blind album listen.

I’m just listening to the full album file on Neil’s website while I type so I can’t see track titles… so I’ll guess at them! A fun little mini game.

You can listen online or download the album on Neil’s site: http://www.neilcic.com/mouthdreams/

1. Yahoooooooo! Prelude

The first song is just the Yahoo! jingle with the “hooooo” increasingly long

And eventually going into a round!

I’m not sure what the orchestral backing is, probably from a movie

2. Intro to Mouth Dreams

Intro to The Twilight Zone but the words are all over the place lol

Hey! “Mouth Dreams” that’s the title of the album! Gee willickers!

3. We Will Sponge You

We Will Rock You by Queen… oh.

It’s the intro to Spongebob Squarepants

Alright hell yeah

This is so stupid but so well done dear lord

4. Folsom Prison Baby Blues

Oh no… that emo band… I forget them

HOOBASTANK that’s it. The Reason

I don’t actually know this other song.

Oh jk he shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.

I think that’s Johnny Cash? Idk the title of the song though.

JUSTIN BEIBER’S BABY

Alright we’re fucking around with “baby” lyrics?

“My momma was a train” lol

“When I was just a train”

“I shot a traaaaaain” yes yes yes

Okay, I looked up the Johnny Cash song to come up with a track title guess.

5. Can’t Touch This Psycho Killer OR Bed’s On Fire

Can’t Touch This! I think the song is called Superfreak though?

Hmmm what’s this other song…

Bed’s on fire

Psycho killer… bed’s on fire… looooool

Ok that song is maybe called Psycho Killer

I’m just waiting for fa-fa-fa-fa-faaaa-fafa-faaaa-fafa-faaaaa-FIRE

Hell yeah saxophone

Yeahyeahyeahyeahyeahyeah to the cadence of runrunrunrunrunnnnn

6. Harpsichord Interlude?

Harpsichord?

I can’t quite make out the lyrics cuz they’re slowed down…

Get Happy, alright

I’m not sure if this is the same song of the last thing was an interlude but it seems like the harpsichord thing persisted soooo maybe the same?

Well maybe this is the only lyric now

The word “happy” has no meaning to my ears any more

Hmm techno kinda beats in the back… reminds me of the back of a Black Eyed Peas song or something

7. Ribs OR Everybody Wants Chili’s Baby Back Ribs

Dreamy triplets

I want my baby back ribs?????

Oh shit what is that guitar riff…

Haaaaaaaaa Chiliiiiiii’s baby back riiiiibs

I don’t wantcha I don’t needcha… oh gosh

THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE

Hahaha the Lion King has snuck in here for “In The Jungle”

OH the guitar backing is Everybody Wants To Rule The World (or whatever the real song title is)

8. Dream Stew

Dream On by Aerosmith

This was in the trailer, yes

Brain Stew by Green Day

My mouth my mouth my mouth

“My face is… my face” is the perfect amount of clunky

9. Do Wanna Miss A Thing

Everclear? Everlong?

I think it’s the Foo Fighters???

Lol the vibrato on this other song is wild

“I don’t miss you baby and I do wanna miss a thing” looool

Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing… idk the band off hand

10. Sleeping With My Clothes On

Lol just… staccato beats with the bass dropping whenever it wants

Blink 182?? Own Worst Enemy?

I see sleeping with clothes on and I raise you... wearing PJs all day (like me)

11. That’s Amore OR Drunk Italians

ITALIAN PIZZA PIE

Lol the lyrics are of course backwards

The wiggly accordion...

BELLS

We’re just tossing noun phrases around like a juggler

Fading out in nightmarish ways as we transition to the next song...

PiiIiIiiIIIzzA

12. Stacy’s Mom’s Pool

“stop.”

Uhhh is this Weezer?

Omg Stacy’s MOM

It think it’s Say It Ain’t So by Weezer

We’re gonna hear a lot about this pool

Hmm it’s not Say It Ain’t So…

It might be In My Mind

More dreamy transitions

13. Noogie OR Cookie

Omg what is this Amazonian flute

Ooooh funky

SHAQ??

The siiiize of these eeeyeeeees

Is this “How I Beat Shaq” ??

Nah, I think this is a song I don’t know

I did it all for the noogie!

Idk if the backing song is the same song as the front… I’m just not familiar with these ones

Surrender… my cookie!

I feel like the Home Improvement jingle is gonna slip in here

14. Never mind i think this is one long song

Han Solo?

This is maybe a different song

Some sort of Star Wars word soup with a CAKE-esque bass backing?

Is this a child’s chorus? Sesame Street?

I wonder who did the Star Wars song…

Oh maybe this is one long song after all…

14. Crazy: Now On VHS

This sounds like a VHS jingle…

Oh lol there it is

Yep yep yep yep yep give me them ALL Neil!

Oh good the loooooong note

Ooh what just came in?

She Drives Me Crazy? Ooh Ooh?

Oh yeah, nailed it… but idk the band again

Lol there’s like 20 more minutes we’re only ⅔ through or so

Ooh I like whatever this four note repetition is

15. Now On VHS! Interlude

And now… our feature presentation…

The Outsiders??

Pony Boy?

We’re just… naming things?

I assume this is one of those old VHS pre-movie commercials where someone is talking about what a great deal this 3-pack of discs is or something

BUMBLEBEE TUNA

Tag urself.... I’m DEATH

I’m literally loling at DEATH

Kid Cuisineeeee

Lonesome guitar coming in…

And… LOL

Rick Astley and A CROWD OF BOOS

Lean in, Neil. Embrace the chaos.

Never Gonna Give You Up is a pretty good song actually

Oh the guitar might be Hurt by… whoever did that

16. Closer To Fireflies

Drop the Arctic Monkeys you coward

Fireflies and Suffocate Me instead

That’s not the title… Fuck you like an animal…

I’d like to------make myself believe (not------PENETRATE YOU) but I see where this came from

Closer To God, that’s right

This and the Spongebob one are my favs so far

17. Benny And The Best

Benny And The Jets…

Uhhh I’m not sure about the punk song

The Best? The Best? The Best? Arouuuund? Is this also the Foo Fighters? U2?

I’m not sure this is its own song

18. Factory With A Girl

UHHH this stressful video game music…

It’s like the factory song from cartoons, not a video game specifically

Fell In Love With A Girl

Oooh jk this my fav, it’s so jazzy

Oh god the manic energy of the “ahhhhhh” part

I think Jet is the band?

This makes me want to walk down the street in a zoot suit snapping every other beat

19. WAHNNABE

WHAT IS IT GOOOOOD FOR

Wait omg it’s WAH

WAH-NNABE

WAH Wario?

WAH… what is it good for loooool

20. Feel Good LLC

Sheep noises?

FEEL GOOD intro laugh

Oh this is unhinged

Omg that music in the back sounds like what going crazy is like, it’s like an evil carnival

The Gorillaz, always good

Lol the sheep noises at the end

21. Irony On Elm Street

Ironic by Alanis Morrisette… okay

He died the next day… then turned 98…

It’s an old man in your chardonnay

IT’S LIKE RAIN omg idk the backing but it’s ominous

I swear to god this backing is from like Nightmare on Elm Street or Halloween or something

Kissed his spoons goodbye

I think it’s whatever horror movie has Jason who I think is the one in the hockey mask?

It’s exactly like 10,000 spoons

22. idk

The winds of Skype

Uhhh some kind of 80s ballad is fading in

SMASH MOUTH YOU’RE HERE

All Star is warbled

WAKE UP

23. Britney’s Fifth

Beethoven’s Fifth?

IT’S BRITNEY, BITCH

Oh fuck yes this is one million percent my jam

24. Hall Of Weezer

HALL OF THE MOUNTAIN KING

Omg I love classical mashups

BANJO KAZOOIE SLEEPING NOISE OMG

Oh lol this is Weezer Say It Ain’t So

Oh gosh the tempo speed up is impressive for the Weezer song which is usually at a steady tempo! Dear god how long did this take to sync…

Modem load up noise… nice

And that’s the album! I might respond to myself and add a retrospective later once I find the track titles.

#neil cicierega #mouth dreams #mashups

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theunitedrealms · 7 years

Note

AUs for you to consider ❤ True as a dragon. They literally find a captured or abandoned baby dragon and Fisk is all "Michael, don't" and Michael does anyway. Also, ER surgeon and nurse- could go either way with them. Or Michael as the person constantly injuring himself and Fisk as the only nurse who puts up with him.

FIRST OF ALL, “Fisk is all “Michael, don’t” and Michael does anyway” is a summary of the entire series

but aside from that observation lemme address these Vitally Important AU’s

Baby Dragon True: I have nothing to add to this perfection?

except that True still climbs into bed with Fisk in the night, even when he starts getting to be so big that the beds just collapse. Not that the inn owners charge them for the beds. Hard to say “hey, pay for that!” when there’s a fucking dragon watching you with beady lil eyes.

Bonus: True develops telepathy bc dragon bonding and shit and Michael just sighs deeply and long-sufferingly when he realizes the dragon considers its name to be Trouble and not True.

Trauma Surgeon Fisk & ER Nurse Michael, because I love Nurse!Michael and also? Fisk with steady hands trained to do fine embroidery and repairs by his mother who worked for a tailoring shop as a seamstress, going into med school after both his parents die of infectious disease but becoming a surgeon because of his mother’s craft. He winds up working as a trauma surgeon because it’s way easier to help people without insurance when it’s on an emergency basis.

(There’s a man named Willard in the Accounting department who is meek and stutters a lot and everyone thinks he’s a coward but his hands are steady when he shreds records and rearranges the bookkeeping to protect people who can’t pay.)

Michael is high empathy so he is always drained after shifts. Fisk tries not to learn names but never forgets faces; Michael knows the name of every single patient and the John/Jane Does haunt him. He absolutely volunteers in his free time and Fisk is just. Baffled by how Michael can spend basically 100% of his waking hours doing this stuff.

Also: Rogue’s Home AU in this verse. Michael gets suuuuuper burnt out after a really bad large-scale emergency and Fisk takes it upon himself to get him back into the groove of things (maybe Michael gets fired/suspended for doing something to save a patient. that sounds like a Michael thing to do.) Obviously this means introducing Michael to his family.

See also: nurses tend to be pretty strong from all the lifting and Michael has tattoos (because obviously) so outside of scrubs he looks pretty rough? Muscular, tall, scar on his chin, tattooed, strong jawline, and he rides a motorcycle so he’s almost always wearing a leather jacket and boots.

Fisk makes a LOT of money so he’s always well dressed and he’s short and broad, freckles, curly hair, ambiguously dark skin tone, chubby cos fuck you it’s hard to get a workout routine in when you’re busy sewing people’s organs back together and also his mother was a tailor so he’s probably judging you for the fit of your suit if you’re rich.

Fisk looks like the slightly-plain-but-cute doctor your parents want you to bring home, but is very much not a person to do the whole Meet The Parents thing and tries his hardest not to care so he’s a little cold at times. And Michael looks like the roguishly handsome guy you bring home to piss off your parents but then he opens his mouth and he’s soft and polite and sweet and offers to fix things around your house.

Also also: because of above “Fisk seems cold; Michael looks rough”, no one thinks they’d be good with kids, but holy shit are they the greatest people with pediatric patients.

cos Fisk will tell a concerned spouse “they’re fine. get some coffee. i have other patients. ask the attending if you have questions, i’m just the surgeon.” but he will crouch down to talk to a kid about their parent/sibling’s status without ever once being condescending, and he’ll spend half an hour explaining the surgery and what happens next.

and Michael is nice to mostly everyone (oh my gods tho my boy and his snap moral judgments - i just pictured him seeing an abuser bring their injured victim in and hooooo boy that’s probably what gets him suspended now that i think about it) but with kids he’ll go out of his way to make sure they’re alright. kids probably ask for him if they’re repeat ER visitors

…both of them keep stickers in their pockets for kids

ER Nurse(/or Doctor) Fisk + Injury-Prone Michael

gods after like the third time he shows up Fisk probably tries to figure out if he’s a battered boyfriend and Michael is confused by Fisk’s insinuations and then startled when he realizes what’s going on and he’s like “oh!!!! no!! i’m single! and not being abused!!”

and that’s when Fisk is like “then what the fuck is your problem?” in the most judgmental tone possible because Michael is here every week with a black eye or bruised ribs or a broken arm, Michael, what the hell

so they get into an argument because Fisk gets sarcastic and Michael gets defensive, and a supervisor of some sort tries to scold Fisk but Michael’s like “huh? oh, no, this is the most fun i’ve had in ages”

and without missing a beat Fisk goes “even more proof of your messed-up psyche” and they’re back to bickering about whether not backing down from a deserved fight is the same as picking fights

Fisk probably distracts him with arguments as he relocates shoulders or pops the cartilage on his nose back into place. he’ll wait until Michael starts in furiously on his counterpoint and then realigns his broken nose and the initial wave of pain won’t even be gone before Michael’s claiming that this is just a cheap way to win an argument

“i was already winning, michael”

“then why’d you have to interrupt my counterargument?”

“because your should was dislocated, michael”

(most of the time fisk absolutely does wait until he’s being outmaneuvered to do it. he swears it’s because that’s when michael is most engaged and therefore better distracted.)

eventually fisk genuinely asks “why are you always injured, anyway” and michael says “i’m a knight errant”

and fisk is like “a WHAT” even though he’s read his medieval literature, probably in the original form of the old language. because IT’S THE 21ST CENTURY, MICHAEL.

mostly it consists of helping senior citizens across streets and and walking college students to their dorms, and attending parties and going to bars to keep an eye out for shenanigans, but inevitably you get a guy like michael in a room full of drunk people who are stupid and aggressive enough when sober, and then inevitably one of them is sufficiently assholeish to merit michael’s interference, and long story short michael gets beat up a lot.

#aus #knight and rogue #theroyalprussianarmy #trauma surgeon!fisk #er doctor!fisk #nurse!michael #modern au #the boys #dragon!true #dragon au #ask

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astrofireworks · 7 years

Text

astro witch coven au (jinjin)

introduction | rocky | eunwoo | moon bin | mj

the only Human in their coven

the only one that actually Went to School and Functions in Human Society

I mean MJ’s also a human that underwent Blood Ritual training but

Jinjin likes to remember that he’s the only one who Suffered School

Sometimes he gets annoyed that everyone else gets to have shortcuts for things while he has to do things manually sometimes

But also sometimes stupid things happen that make him glad he’s a regular human

And it’s hilarious sometimes seeing the other magic users flounder at simple tasks that normal people do without magic anyway

A confused Bin @ the microwave because he’s never had to use a microwave to heat up his food before

He kind of just scatters crystals around whatever needs to be heated up and mutters a quick Heating spell and waits for it to work

So when Jinjin bungs a bowl of ramyeon in the microwave and takes it out after three minutes and his noodles are cooked Bin is pretty shocked

Cue Bin spending the rest of the day prodding the microwave and suspiciously putting different things in

Rocky muttering angrily at the air conditioning whenever it breaks down because back at the Bangtan coven he usually got Jimin or Taehyung to help him ~magic~ it better

Jinjin grabbing a ladder and prodding around the air conditioning unit until it starts blasting cold air again and Rocky is shookt

came for Rocky…

has been Rocky’s best friend since forever

ok not forever but it’s pretty close

literally knows everything about Rocky, from Rocky’s first crush to what can make Rocky laugh until his stomach hurts

can tell from Rocky’s eyes when he’s annoyed, happy, flustered etc even if his face is covered

it alarms the rest of Astro how accurate it is sometimes because Rocky’d come in looking stormy and everyone’d freeze up but Jinjin would just reach behind him for a sandwich and toss it over to Rocky and the Park Minhyuk™ Beam would come out immediately

the cutest!!!!

I love the Park Minhyuk™ Beam

used to get into all sorts of shit with Rocky

which was literally all the time since Rocky didn’t go to school

that one time Rocky stole a Luck potion from Yoongi’s stash to split with Jinjin the day before Jinjin’s final exam

and replaced the potion with green soda

obviously got caught since soda looks nothing close to the bubbling, glittery (and might I add, opaque) lime green potion

rip my poor boy

when Yoongi found out Jin was 80% sure shit was about to go down so he slipped like 10 Calming crystals around Yoongi’s potions room and sent his boyfriend in to reason with Yoongi

because I mean, Rocky didn’t steal it for his own personal gain or anything he truly genuinely wanted to help his best friend

and for some reason it never crossed his mind that he could have just asked Yoongi or bought it from Yoongi lmao

cue a fumbling Namjoon trying to explain to a calm but annoyed Yoongi what a young teen with access to a potions stash’s thought process might have been

and a thirteen-year-old Rocky sliding back in through the fence and into the potions room only to meet with a very unimpressed Namjoon and a very unamused Yoongi and a very worried Jin hovering by the door

I mean, sure he was grounded and stuff but what stuck with both Jinjin and Rocky after the whole encounter was

1) Yoongi: “if you wanted a Luck potion that badly, you should have asked, bought it or learned how to make it.”

2) Yoongi: “if you needed a Luck potion that urgently, you should have stolen it better.”

Cue a very excited Taehyung teaching Rocky and Jinjin how to steal things without people noticing

Also cue a frazzled Bangtan coven house when they start realising things have been going missing & a cackling Taehyung & a very innocent-looking Rocky

Because what???? Park Minhyuk stealing things????? Unheard of in this house !!

Also cue a very frustrated Jungkook when he woke up to all his underwear gone rip

but that wasn’t so much stealing as Taehyung and Rocky pulling pranks

3) that Yoongi’s Luck potions were A+ and they really did work, as shown by Jinjin’s 99% on the final

anyways yes they got up to a lot of different shenanigans

moved into the Astro coven so he could make sure his best friend wasn’t being kidnapped by a serial murderer

has anyone watched Eunwoo on crime scene 3 he was very good he was beautiful I 10000% recommend watching it

I recommend the series in general but anyway

I mean with someone so handsome can you ever trust them

Jinjin thinks not

The only handsome person you can ever trust, in Jinjin’s opinion is Jinjin

And so he meets Eunwoo and is introduced to Bin and gets along with Bin like a house on fire

…stayed for MJ

hooooo boy are you ready for this

the first time MJ comes over it’s with a gigantic batch of slightly burnt brownies

and this was before Sanha came in so the house was still relatively quiet

and so Rocky’s in his room in the basement and Eunwoo and Bin are upstairs on the second floor doing who-knows-what

and Jinjin’s the only one free to open the door

and so he does

MJ (gigantic beam): “HI HELLO I’M MJ I LIVE NEXT DOOR & I THOUGHT YOU GUYS LOOKED REALLY FRIENDLY SO I’M HERE TO DELIVER BROWNIES”

Jinjin: (loading screen)

MJ: “trust me thEY’RE REALLY GOOD BROWNIES”

Jinjin, muffled behind a tray full of brownie: “oh my god are you usually this loud”

MJ: “whAT??”

Jinjin, scrambling: “WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME INTO OUR HOUSE”

MJ: (beaming intensifies)

And so this is how Rocky finds Myungjin sitting around the kitchen, brownie crumbs all over the counter and MJ talking a mile a minute about the weather and Jinjin trying to form a sentence in his head without it being blasted to pieces by MJ’s smile

And this is how Binu finds them in the kitchen, with much less brownie than MJ came with and 3stro standing against the kitchen wall trying to determine who was the tallest

(spoilers, it was Rocky)

reminder that at this point MJ all thought they were human and 3stro thought MJ didn’t know about magic so

I mean, all in all they’re pretty good at pretending they’re non-magical

But MJ’s grown up with KNK and their portion of the supernatural community

And so when he sees small (anti-Burning) crystals tucked into different corners of the kitchen, courtesy of That Time Jinjin Fell Asleep While Cooking, he smiles to himself

At least he doesn't have to explain to Jinjin why his in-laws-to-be don’t eat dinner

Cue MJ casually pointing out the crystals: “oh where did u get those we usually order them from the VIXX coven”

Bin: falls out of his chair

Jinjin, turns pale and stammers a bit before Eunwoo sensibly whacks the back of his head and proudly pats Bin’s empty chair

Eunwoo: “yeah we have our own Charmer here”

Rocky: “pls don't say charmer ever again he’s nowhere near charming”

Eunwoo, opening his mouth to rebut but blushing and closing it on second thought

Wow way to go vivi sneaking a little binu in again

runs a flower store as a front for the Astro coven house

I mean he literally has a garden in their backyard full of weird-ass flowers and herbs that he has to tend to because Rocky needs them for his potions

He might as well plant a few more and make it a “family” business

I mean the extra income is always welcome

And so he set up an online store for people to order flowers and arrangements and bouquets with

Isn’t a botany witch but !! still ahs green fingers so his plants all grow very well without magic thank you very much

*without that much magic

Got Bin to enchant his entire garden to be anti-pest so he can label himself “organic” and “pesticide-free” for those who looked for stuff like that

Gets Rocky to brew a couple potions for the cut flowers that keep them fresher longer so he can provide fresh flowers all year round regardless of the season

Also gets Bin to charm some of them once in a while to sparkle a little extra or seem less dead

So really, without that much magic,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Sells mostly to magic users, although there are a few clueless humans who place orders on his online store

Once got called in to decorate a house by a mysterious online customer with the name Michael Jackson ‘to make the house seem less… dead!’

It was KNK’s house

Jinjin was not amused

Inseong was very pleased though so there was that

also manages their finances and other household things, the resident Dad™

with the help of MJ of course

so they basically do things like balance Bin’s, Eunwoo’s and Rocky’s books in addition to their own

and take a little money out of each account to pay for stuff like electricity and food and soap and random stuff

Jinjin places orders for whatever they need (like vials or ladles or bandages) along with his own orders to save on shipping and stuff

It’s like a very well-run set-up, if Jinjin says so himself

Takes care of their general food situation as well with MJ

Ok listen it’s so domestic alright

MJ chopping vegetables and singing & Jinjin standing at a pot stirring and humming along and staring at MJ being loud and silly

Jinjin’s face softening into a smile and just

Wow

Wow he’s so soft for this beautiful man who beamed his way into his life

MJ meeting Jinjin’s eyes and seeing this wonderfully soft look on his face and

“FRICKITY FRACK IT’S BURNING”

cue a mad scramble to get the pot off the stove

but Mj doesn’t forget that look, no, he keeps it in his mind like a kid keeps candy tucked away in his pocket, to be pulled out on a bad day and to ponder over and savour

part of the Needs to Be Protected Squad (1/2)

we all know MJ’s 2/2

squeaks whenever someone rings the doorbell

at first they had a very serious meeting as to who was allowed to answer the doorbell and who wasn’t

Rocky was very against Jinjin answering the doorbell because I mean you’re never sure who’s ringing it – it might be someone magical looking to kidnap Jinjin or something

But Eunwoo pointed out Jinjin, being the only Human, was also the only one who could actually properly appear Human in case it really was a Human knocking on their door

Given that Bin changes hair colour nearly every week or so and usually has blue energy trailing after him

And that Rocky’s stuck in the basement nearly all the time and can never hear the doorbell anyway

And Eunwoo can’t really get up in the middle of treating a patient

And so it was Jinjin

But usually whoever rings the doorbell turns out to be human after all

Like that one kid who accidentally kicked a ball into KNK’s garden and was too afraid of ‘the tall, scary uncles’ to go and rummage in their garden for it

And so Jinjin had to go do it for him

Or that one grandma who fussed over ‘all those handsome boys in the house’ and really she’s concerned if they’re all eating well because they look like they live alone poor dears

And so now she makes them kimchi and tofu on a regular basis in exchange for MJ and Jinjin coming over sometimes to repair things in her house or to help her with things

So really MJ and Jinjin are the neighbourhood sweethearts fight me on this

And so this is more or less how Jinjin’s made a couple friends up and down the street

But they all turn out to be human mostly because those who ring the doorbell looking for Eunwoo or Bin or Rocky or MJ ring a separate doorbell, hidden under layers of spells and only visible to magic users

but also after those couple times Bin fell asleep and didn’t unlock the door to let the client up, all of Bin’s clients all kind of learnt to ring the main doorbell in addition to Bin’s to let everyone else in the house know

i should probably introduce the fantagio girls at some point too idk

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anti-otherkin-confessions · 7 years

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I know this is cringy cause I’m 15, but me and my brother and some of our friends like to go into the woods sometimes and pretend to be werewolves and basically it turns into the game manhunt, where the goal is to turn everyone onto your team to werewolves or back to humans. It’s dumb but it’s actually really fun and we laugh a lot and make melodramatic jokes and pretend to howl and basically act like idiots and it’s all innocent and fine. Just bros hanging out.

Everyone in our school knows about it and they really don’t care because we’re great guys imo and they know we’re jokin. Sometimes other kids want to join in and that’s cool too. It gets a bit crazy but none of us actually believe any of it cause it’s game.

So my younger brother has this friend who is a therian, or says he’s one and he started talking about it a few months back. He calls himself a wolf sometimes which is silly and all but he’s an okay kid. I looked up therians and they seem like pretty chill people who just happen to have a different spiritual outlook about past lives. There’s some that are way out there but most I’ve seen who aren’t on cringe blogs seem harmless enough and have their heads on right.

My brother’s friend, this kid, let’s call him Wolf has always been a bit odd to me like ridic shy, but he’s 13 and my brother is just silly too but hooooo boy, what a rabbit hole this became. I still am to this day not sure whether or not this kid was yanking us around since he told my brother a lot about ‘being a wolf’ and things a wolf in a human’s body needs, and my brother is a great listener and really supportive guy and he didn’t think this kid was lying.

Not sure how he got his parents to agree to this but he only eats things like steak at school (why do otherkin do this?!) and won’t touch hamburgers in the cafe because they’re too human or tainted or smething. I literally never see this kid with some wholesome damn veggies. I don’t know a lot cause I don’t see him a lot but jesus christ eat some fucking fruit at leaset.

My brother says since Wolf started saying he’s a therian he is really jumpy in class and will interrupt things if he sees an animal outside and sometimes lick his lips and whine and just generally fuck with the class’s time by being a disruptive little fuck. He shuts up when the teacher tells him and then bitches to my brother about how unfair it is after and therians are so misunderstood.

Remember how I mentioned we like to play manhunt as werewolves and hunters at the start?

Wolf was never interested in my friend group before but now he asks my little bro if he can join in and since my brother thinks he’s still kind of yanking us, and he still likes this kid, he says yeah. And the first few games we alright. Wolf got really into character and didn’t like our joking (our jokes are rude af to be fair) but if he thinks he has a spirit of a wolf, okay, maybe he just has more fun with it and has a different sense of humor. So I kind of pass that off as whatever and assume he’s just a little shit in class.

Last time though he text my brother and asked if we to planned to go out manhunting like normal but since it was a full moon we should do it early so it’s more real. Why not, right?

We meet him early cause it’s just me, my little bro, and my best friend this time and I guess that got him feeling less self conscious, but this time he’s wearing this weird triangle thing he shows us which he says is the therian symbol so they can all know each other if they see it. While we’re walking he starts going on about how he’s fucking chosen to teach therianism to people and because we pretend to be werewolves in A FUCKING GAME we need to take it moe seriously cause it’s not a game!?! We just haven’t awakened to our true natures as wolves. He says he’s got all these fucking books and something called the GODDAMN THERIAN FUCKING BIBLE and there’s a therian temple idfk. He’s got so much detail on all this bullshit that I stopped thinking he was joshing us cause it’s just gone too far.

It was so awkward that my friend pretended he got a text from his mom and she was pissed he’d left at night without saying where he went and we all escaped by agreeing oh yeah our fams will be pissed.

Sorry this is long. I been holding it in because it’s too stupid to share with my other friends and we didn’t want to get him all bullied an shit but dear god I kind of wish someone would tell the rest of the group so he’d smarten the fuck up from bein embarrsed.

#submission

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mintylilacs · 4 years

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So I hoisted my sewing machine from the depths of the downstairs pantry today

I quickly learned that was not a particularly good idea.

Literally every problem I could have I do have. My thread keeps breaking because the set up makes it just... impossibly hard to pull thread off a cardboard tube cause the thing that keeps the tube from coming off the stick makes the thread just catch at an odd angle and break so I ended up just taking it off and taping the other end down so it wouldn’t fall off. But I do t know if that worked cause immediately worse shit happened.

(This was after my bobbin threader just... accidentally fell out of place and made it look like my machine was broken cause I’d press the pedal and it would do like one stitch and then just whir and not go anywhere.)

Then my entire bobbin system just... self destructed and I had to put the whole thing back together with no guide because when you look up “singer tradition bobbin” you get normal tutorials about how to thread and insert a bobbin, not what to do if the ENTIRE MECHANISM FALLS APART MID STITCH BECAUSE A SINGLE LITTLE PIECE OF PLASTIC GOT JOSTLED OUT OF POSITION AND LET THE ENTIRE THING CAME LOOSE, BREAKING YOUR NEEDLE IN THE PROCESS

So of course I did the only logical thing, I went upstairs, got a slice of chocolate cream pie from the kitchen, grabbed some matches and an incense stick and vibe checked my fucking sewing machine cause clearly SOMETHING got ahold of it while I wasn’t paying attention. And I cried, just a little. Cause here I am holding half the bobbin system in my hands and my needle is broken and I JUST WANTED TO UPCYCLE A SHEET INTO CLOTH NAPKINS WITHOUT HAVING TO HAND STITCH THE FUCKING EDGES DAMNIT

And then, between me running back and forth to the garage for various tools (a screwdriver -cause I thought the bobbin threader problem was an internal issue so I took part of the cover off to make sure things were moving alright-then two separate pairs of pliers cause I lost the little key you use to change the needle and the first pair of pliers I grabbed was too big) I LET BUGS INTO THE HOUSE. WEIRD BUGS.

Well ok one was weird, the rest were garden variety, little mosquitoes that don’t even bite that often cause they’re stupid and tiny, one of those big ol scary looking ones that eats the tiny mosquitos, a couple tiny flies, all good prey for my cat who needs to exxersize more and wanted to come down and hang out with me anyway.

But then there came The Thing.

It LOOKS like a wasp or wasp adjacent entity. But mind you this is happening at 11:30 pm. One does not often see those in the middle of the night, it’s one of the reasons I’m partially nocturnal, even without the adhd night is just far more pleasant for someone who is triggered by the sound of bees and wasps.

But here’s the thing. That triggering sound? That horrific buzz that activates my fight or flight response of one of those tickets cones within like... fifteen feet of me? This bug didn’t do that.

The only reason I didn’t think it was just a particularly large fly was because of how fast it moved and how much noise it made slamming into the lights.

My downstairs has the ceiling of a classroom, with those big plastic-y panels that cover the lights? And when large bugs crash into those going full tilt, it THUMPS.

So here I am, the damn thing lands on the ceiling, and I squinting up at it trying to figure out WHAT THE FUCK IT IS.

Cause it kind of looks like a wasp sized black ant with wings. I’ve NEVER encountered such a creature in all my years (and believe me, I’ve encountered a few, where do you think I got the phobia from? Those fuckers went right for my crotch and my crime? Standing. Literally just standing and WHOOP up my pants they went! From that day I trusted no bitch.)

So anyway I got Lilly and I upstairs and now we’re chilling. And I left a note for my dad telling him to not let the weird bug upstairs.

I’ve half a mind to think this is some fae bullshit. I mean the sewing machine definetly is and I can fix that up but like that bug just does not look right.

Still, that room has so many iron antiques and the garage, hooooo boy. Maybe it came through a gap in the screen door?

I don’t care how it got in or what it is I want it out.

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