#i am just someone who likes knowing things and is really annoying about consuming ethically

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

Hey, so I saw your post about some fics demonizing Neytiri. That has actually been one of my major fears as a fic writer, attempting to balance Neytiri's extremely valid trauma and the POV I'm writing from (that is typically flawed in some way). I was wondering, since you seem very well-versed on the topic, what do you define as "demonizing" for Neytiri? Is it ok to write from a perspective where a character doesn't really like or trust her, as long as the trauma is noted? Do you have any resources so I can educate myself to properly write this kind of character?

I really want to make sure I'm doing right by Neytiri and improve as a fic writer overall, so any advice you could offer would be very much appreciated!

Whoa, what a complicated and nuanced question. A great one! And I'm super flattered you came to me! Just one I'm going to try to answer to the best of my ability. I'm assuming you're referring to Norm's pov in your fic?

First of all, I do not want to at all proclaim to be an expert on generational trauma; I am not a person of color, and I have been lucky enough to have a very normal and healthy family. I just had a best friend growing up in an abusive household and took steps to educate myself best I could to understand the situation, which I believe anyone would do. So I'm just gonna try to word vomit out my thoughts for you, please ask questions or challenge any of what I say if any of you see anything you think is incorrect. Buckle in, this will be long.

What do you define as "demonizing" for Neytiri?

Demonizing means portraying someone as wicked or threatening, as evil or worthy of contempt and blame.

For me, demonizing for Neytiri is the trend I've seen lately of portraying her as this unyielding, animalistic type character who's hatred of humans, Spider specifically, goes so far that she gets physically violent with Spider and eventually ends up tearing apart her family. In these fics, Jake is always a sad sack loser bystander, loving his wife too much to step in but of course shamefully knowing how wrong what she's doing is. Infantilizing poor white savior Jake Sully, being brow beaten by his mean indigenous wife into neglecting a child is a weirdly strong take in this fandom. Often Mo'at is a wise elder chiding Neytiri for being unable to get over her prejudice. Mo'at and Jake understand Neytiri as much as anyone would, they wouldn't shame her. To me, it's an extremely reductive and frankly borderline racist characterization. When paired with a sympathetic view of Quaritch, it is at best irresponsible and at worst knowingly dangerous.

Neytiri is representative of an indigenous woman. I feel like I don't have to explain why making her violent, volatile, and completely unreasonable is a little bit of a harmful caricature. In these fics, for me, Neytiri ceases to be a person. She looses autonomy to sort of represent this monolith of hatred and prejudice that has hurt our little baby boy Spider. It's crazy to me that people can't apply the exact same empathy they have towards Spider (saving Quaritch) to Neytiri (not being able to trust Spider). They are the most foil of foil characters. Their storylines are extremely similar, if I'm being honest. Essentially, ignoring the fact that Neytiri is a member of a minority community being actively genocided by Spider's people is intentionally reductive. If you can empathize with Spider, and ESPECIALLY if you find Quaritch sympathetic, finding Neytiri's actions unforgivable is racism, plain and simple.

Also, side note, the lengths people go to where Neytiri just literally will not budge under any circumstances at all is INSANE.

(I read a fic the other day where she gave Spider to child protective services behind everyone's back. That's LUNACY. She only came around after she almost lost Tuk when Tuk was suddenly born prematurely and Mo'at came in and was like "Eywa made it so you can never have kids again because of what you did, have you learned your lesson yet?" Like?? I do not understand the HATRED some of ya'll have for her, the suffering you all think she deserves. She's having an EXTREMELY NORMAL trauma reaction to surviving GENOCIDE? Examine yourselves greatly).

But where I was going was Neytiri is the same character who pushed her parents to let them go to human school, fell in love with human Jake, defended him and trusted him despite her family, mated with him and lost her religious position because of it, and then had a bunch of part human kids with him, and adopted a fully freak of nature kid born of a human she loved and respected. She has human friends, she wears and uses human tech, and she forgave Jake after he had betrayed them. Basically what I'm saying is Neytiri, despite her continuous trauma, is the most open and curious and non traditional Na'vi of all time. Girl is READY to meet new people and learn new shit, and to be open to everyone. Sometimes I think about a no trauma Neytiri and I get emotional. I think it's crazy to say she would never budge on Spider, if it wasn't for his dad I'm pretty sure she would've softened lonnnnng ago, if not having liked him from the get go.

Um, that got way too long I have too many thoughts. Second half of your question.

Is it ok to write from a perspective where a character doesn't really like or trust her, as long as the trauma is noted?

This is a tricky question, because technically there is nothing you can't do as a writer. Of course, it also means there is nothing anyone can't criticize you for writing. Like, Colleen Hoover can say she's writing realistic depictions of domestic abuse until the cows come home, I'm still going to say she's romanticizing and normalizing it in a super callous way. Neither of us can stop the other. So yeah, of course you're okay to write from the perspective of a character that doesn't like Neytiri. I just think the point will be what your prerogative is. One of my MFA professors says it in a way I like and I'm sure I've referenced before, if you aren't trying to make a point about something that might have to have a trigger warning then don't include it. I always say I would take it a step further; if your point is to defend that thing, don't do it. So for me, my big points would be try not to project my own feelings onto the character either way; if the character is wrong about something and the narrative intends to show that they will either learn, or we the reader will grow past them. But to be sure what you feel the takeway of the piece is is what you wanted it to be, I guess.

Do you have any resources so I can educate myself to properly write this kind of character?

Well, I have a few on white writers writing BIPOC characters and the ethics of that if you're interested in that. But I don't have any on specifically writing generational trauma. I guess I'd say reading and absorbing are my biggest tools; so reading books/watching movies or TV that use the speculative to translate generational trauma, and learning about and taking in the real life examples the character is based on. Read up on some genocides, and indigenous people today and how their lives are still affected. Even just watch the news; we're witnessing a very public genocide being pushed right to our attention right now. And of course, that is not the only genocide happening rn, it's just the only one we're talking about, so there's plenty of real world case studies unfortunately right in front of us.

#this got way way too long #it's almost midnight and i still have work tomorrow #i was goING to answer a few asks during amazing race tonight and instead #just this #lol #my bad #hope this helps! feel free to ask or dm with any questions or grievances haha #keep in mind i am not an expert! #i am just someone who likes knowing things and is really annoying about consuming ethically #anyways spider fandom i need u to lay off my girl #fandom criticism of bipoc characters is somehow always a little rooted in racism #but that's because we've all got internalized racism my friends and we cannot escape it without daily intentional thought and conversation #neytiri sully #miles spider socorro #spider socorro #spider sully #jake sully #jeytiri #mo'at #miles quaritch #tuktirey sully #norm spellman #avatar #avatar the way of water #james cameron avatar #melissa og #melissa on avatar (cameron) #melissa is an english major

[that-peach-anon]

Did no one say Sam and Max coraline au? Ahaha i wrote for it anyways (:

Almost 3000 words of Geek angst because i adore her character kahshdkshs

This was written based on @lesbialien 's coraline au and i hope y'all enjoy it!

---

Geek had never been one to depend on others. She had grown up in the basement after all, and being a kid genius, she knew how to take care of anything necessary for survival.

Not that she had been taken care of before. Not many people are interested in adopting the kid that was busier studying bugs' corpses rather than playing dolls with her peers. But that was okay too. She'd much rather be left in the orphanage where there were no parents to smother her and distract her from her studies, she was a person of science after all.

And then came Sam and Max. A duo that called themselves “freelance police" but had much too twisted morals and messed up ethics to be considered any sort of responsible and trustworthy employees. And that was okay. Geek didn’t have that many worries about ethics and morals, after all, to learn things, sometimes morals and ethics get in the way. If she had been adopted by normal people, they would have insisted for her to stop with the dissections and chemically hazardous experiments because that's “not for kids", and that would have been awful. But no, Sam and Max didn't care about that, in fact, most of the times they were the ones in danger, where Max would eat dead animals or consume poisonous chemicals, and Sam would just laugh it off and never get angry at Geek for them allowing Max to do so.

And that made sense. They weren't her parents, so why should they berate her for doing whatever she wanted. She more or less worked for them, only seeing them every few times that they needed some wacky gadget for another case. And that was totally fine with geek. Yeah. They didn’t care if Sam and Max were always busy, they were just her employers, more or less. So it was fine that they didn't spend that much time with the duo, she was only there to make stuff for them, and that was okay. Or at least she liked to pretend so.

But then something changed. One day, the rabbit and dog approached her looking rather embarrassed, which wasn't common for them, and asked to talk to her. That had triggered some alarms. They never were serious or mature enough to have talks instead of just being ignorant to everything, so this meant they were about to do something drastic that involved her. And that wasn't bad, per say. They were glad to finally be able to spend some time with the two, but she wasn't sure if this was going to be time spent doing something enjoyable.

Maybe they had decided that her services were no longer necessary? Or they had found another child genius that was happier and more energetic than Geek will ever be, and they were about to trade her for them? The possibilities were endless. But nothing had prepared them for what truly happened.

Across from them sat a beaming Sam and Max, signed adoption papers on top of the table that stood between them. Adoption papers for them. They had adopted Geek. They were her parents. This wasn't really what she expected out of all the unpredictable things they could do.

“You two… adopted me?” Her voice had been quieter than she wanted it to be, barely able to fight back the nausea slowly crawling up their throat. “Officially? As in, legally?”

“Well, yes.” Sam looked rather calm for what was supposed to be a tremendous occasion for her. “Me and Max were talking during a case and we thought it would be a good idea to adopt you, so we did.”

“Plus, the orphanage was being annoying as hell and kept bothering us about if we were gonna adopt you or else you had to go back!” Max added, apparently picking something off the sharp blades he had as teeth. “And we don't wanna look for a replacement, so this was the least troublesome thing we could do.”

If she didn't know Max better, they would think he didn't care at all, but she could see how his left foot was bouncing in place, a nervous stim he had whenever he was anxious. Max always had a soft spot for kids, so she knew he was just trying to look calm while he panicked on the inside.

“Am… am I supposed to call you two dad and father from now on?” She asked, bunching the end of her skirt in one hand.

“Do whatever you want, kid.” Max answered dismissively, Geek ignoring the way he had one of his hands holding Sam's, another telltale sign of nervousness from him. “We don't care.”

“Okay.” Their usually strong voice was now soft, barely leaving their tongue as it weighed down like lead. “I'm going back to the basement if you don't mind.”

“We'll be here if you need to talk, alright, kiddo?” Sam had asked, already stretching as he got up from the chair. Geek had done nothing more than give a dismissive hum, already having their mind in a turmoil, thoughts thrashing around like a hurricane, making her head spin and stomach tighten.

  That conversation had happened a few days ago, already just a sour memory she kept repeating in their head as her thoughts bothered and invaded her mind. Not much had changed noticeably. Now they would sometimes check up on her before grabbing a gadget and leaving, or tell her about a case before already going to another, leaving her alone for hours on end. Now Sam used more nicknames like kiddo and champ, and Max had taken to calling them kid instead of Geek. And that wasn't bad, Geek just couldn't bring herself to act with them as if everything was fine and nothing changed.

Were they going to stop her from doing her experiments because it was too dangerous and they had to make sure she stayed alive? Would they not let her do anything dangerous in case she could get hurt? Or maybe they would try putting her in school, even if she had already attended college at this point. Or they'd simply stop her from being herself and make them act like a normal child.

That would be way out of character for Sam and Max, but maybe this wasn't something she was scared of, but rather something she hoped for? Perhaps she longed for the two of them to worry about her and care about her instead of only herself being the only one that actually cares about what happens to them. Maybe she wanted a break from having to take care of herself while still a child and have someone else be the one caring for her.

But she couldn't ask that from Sam and Max, they had reckless personalities. They only really showed direct worry when something truly bad happened, like when one of the duo went missing and the other went mad trying to find them. To be honest, she didn't think they truly had showed any direct worry. Whenever they asked about how she felt they always dismissed her answer because they were more entertained by something else. They truly did try to care for them, but the two of them just weren't used to not being in tune with someone's feelings like they were with each other’s. She doesn't remember the last time one of them had to ask the other how they felt, they just usually knew.

She knew they didn't do it out of malice, they just didn't really know how to communicate. The two had never been the most in tune with feelings, barely acknowledging their own in favor of living a blissfully ignorant life. Their attempts at “parenting" Geek never quite worked out. She supposes it’s because they don't really know how to take care of something that has the capability of human thought. The most difficult thing the two had truly raised up until now was a crocodile, and he had had to be left in someone else's care in the end, so maybe it didn't count. But they tried, or at least tried to try.

The blame couldn't be placed only on the two, though. Geek's internal conflict also served as an incredibly unhelpful existence. While she did long for this whole family thing to be normal, it never did feel quite right. She felt like an intruder in the dynamic of the duo, like her only reason to interact with them was to provide a place where their gadgets came from. They felt… like a side-character, like someone who didn't belong. Maybe Sam and Max forgot about her whenever they weren't talking to her directly. I mean, the two barely knew she existed half of the time, so it was a possibility.

Anyway. So, listening wasn't their strong suit. But that's okay, at least they cared to ask, even if it did upset Geek when they found out none of them had truly listened. But that was alright, she could deal with being ignored, she already lived with that for 13 years. It was fine. She could just care for herself.

Which, wasn't something she was currently doing while dissecting a bass. In fact, she was so lost in thought, reminiscing over the words that kept playing in her head, that they had no time to notice as the scalpel slid and cut open a gash in their palm.

“Ow! Goddamn it!” They shouted in pain, the cutting tool falling on the tray next to her, letting out a loud bang as metal met metal.

Using a nearby tissue, she pressed it against the palm, grumbling at how much blood was seeping out and how annoying it would be when trying to move their hand. It was a bit deep; she probably would have needed to bandage it up but that was fine. They had created a gadget meant to cauterize wounds, so it would be healed pretty quickly.

Rummaging through the gadgets in their desk, she ignored the blood dripping and staining the tiles beneath her feet, sighing loudly when they remembered where the gadget was.

Max had taken it a few days ago to test his theory. The gadget looked like a simple butter knife, but it heated up dangerously, so the lagomorph had wanted to see if by stabbing someone with it, the wound would cauterize and it would be a good torture method. She hadn't been able to get in a word before Max had run away with it, a manic smile already on his face.

And just like with all the other gadgets they got from her that they didn’t end up destroying, it was most probably thrown half-hazardly into their closet, added to the junk pile they had, ranging from memoirs from their cases to just random crap they found and decided to keep.

Arriving to the office, she opened the door with her elbow, already prepared to apologize for all the blood falling from her hand, but just like every time Sam and Max left for a case, the office was empty, the only noise coming from the still on ceiling fan. Closing the door with their back, Geek looked around to examine the room, cringing at how everything was either littered with bullet holes or just plain destroyed.

Opening the closet with her foot, she pulled on the string that hung from the ceiling, closing her eyes as the artificial yellow light invaded their vision, fluorescent shine illuminating the room. Blinking to adjust, she stepped further in, eyes jumping around to try and spot the object she was searching for. Where would a gadget hide in such a messy-

The object she was looking for fell in front of her, startling them as it rolled away a bit. Sighing, she knelt down to grab it, eyes snapping up as she realized that before her stood a small purple door with a gold doorknob. It was one of the memoirs from a case that Sam and Max had gone on, a fight against a gigantic banana slug in a mostly inhabited building. In the end, the owner of the building, a nice woman named Coraline, had decided to destroy the place, claiming it had too many child disappearances and was no longer safe. Since the slug had left nothing, they both stole a door that was in the wreckage, just chucking it into the closet and forgetting about it.

But now, instead of being fallen as it had been before, it was vertical, attached to the wall, with a dim blue light coming from beneath it. Geek had seen stranger things in her life, so they simply shrugged it off and turned to leave.

“Geek.”

Freezing in place, she turned around as a lulling voice came from the door. How did it know their name? Putting the gadget down, seeing as the wound had already stopped bleeding, she stepped closer, already grabbing the knob to slowly pry the door open, tilting their head as inside there was only a long blue tunnel, similar to those fabric tubes cats and young babies played in.

This was new. It definitely wasn't her making, and Sam and Max aren't smart enough to make a whole dimensional portal, so this wasn't part of their knowledge. Crouching down, she started crawling through the tunnel, only looking back when the door clicked in place as it closed by itself. At the other end was a door almost identical to the one she had gone through, except this one held what looked to be like claw marks.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed it open, sighing in disappointment as it led back to the office. Stepping out, she gasped as they realized that Sam and Max were there now, both looking to their respective tasks as they worked away, Sam typing while Max carved something onto his desk. Above them hung a “welcome home, Geek!” poster, slightly crooked to the left as it held on by two thin nails, one in each of the top corner.

Hearing the door close behind her with a slam, both Sam and Max turn to her, Geek immediately turning around to look at the small, purple, closed, door.

“Geek! Where were you? We were worried sick! We were waiting for you to tell us about your gadget you're making but we couldn't find you anywhere!” Sam spoke, stopping his typing as he pushed the chair away from his table, already standing up to greet her.

“Yeah, I wanna know if I can kill someone with it!” Max shouted, jumping up from his chair as he tried scrambling after Sam, in a spider like way, crawling onto his shoulder.

“Sorry about disappearing, I was just going through that door in the closet.” She explained, turning back around and looking down at their feet. “I'm sorry.”

“That's okay, kiddo! Just tell us next time so we don't worry so much.” Sam ruffled her hair as he spoke, Max jumping down from where he had perched himself to hug Geek, making her tense up.

“Yeah, we missed you lots!” Max spoke, seeming not caring about how tense Geek was in his arms, or the way she was barely breathing.

Looking up at Sam, she let out a shout of surprise as they spotted the black buttons that substituted his eyes. Pushing away from Max, she stepped back, looking at him in horror to find Max, too, had button eyes.

“What's wrong, kid?” Max asked, tilting his head at them. “Got something in my teeth?”

“You're not Sam and Max.” She affirmed, backing away and already grabbing the doorknob once again.

“Well, of course not! We're Other Sam and Other Max!” The tall dog replied in a duh tone, as if it was obvious. “We're just like them, except better in every way! Now come on, tell us about the gadget.”

“Okay.” Even when talking only to what seemed to be imitations of Sam and Max, she couldn't bring herself too not be polite. Kids were supposed to obey their parents, according to all the movies and series she watched as a way to know how children normally behave. “It's a neutron destabilizer-"

“Ooooh, neutron destabilizer, huh? Sounds fun!” Max exclaimed, hanging off of one of Sam's shoulders, smiling.

“Do you even know what neutrons are?” She asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

“It's a part of the atom just like electrons and protons and all that sciency stuff.” He waved her off, and if he had actual eyes, she was sure he'd be rolling them.

“Yeah… anyway, I think the name is pretty self-explanatory so you must know what it does and-"

“But how does it work?” Sam interrupted, leaning back against his desk.

“You… actually want to know?”

“Of course, we like hearing about your day!”

“Oh.” She absent mindedly let go of the door, giving her full attention to them. “Well, it works by-"

And this was how she spent the rest of the evening. And sure, this Sam and Max weren't the real ones, but it actually felt nice to be heard once. Besides, they didn't seem to be hostile, so it didn't look as if they would be dangerous. So yeah, they did end up convincing them of sitting down to talk about other projects, but it was okay. It's not like she was going back. Visiting them was a one-time thing, right?

#sam and max #sam and max freelance husbands #sam and max freelance police #darla gugenheek #samandmax

[ferret-not-microwave]

Les Amis Modern AU: What They Wish Others Believed About Them (Part 5)

[I kind of wrote this in response to some general trends in characterising the Amis. There are some stereotypes which I'm not quite comfortable with.]

[Hey, y'all! I'm so sorry for not posting this series for a long time, I was flattened for the past 12 days by COVID-19. We have Cosette and Marius today, and I'm so glad that I am feeling better enough to write about them. Cheerio!]

Cosette:

• Is fed up of being considered dainty, fragile, weak and excessively nice, a bit of a pushover. She is anything but. Living with crappy foster parents don't really let you do that. She can stand up against bullshit with biting sarcasm if necessary. It's just that Cosette doesn't rise to the bait very easily, because she has trained herself to ignore battles which don't need her attention. But that doesn't mean that she needs to be protected all the time.

• Is sick of having to relate her childhood traumas in order to not be judged as being a privileged airhead. Cosette likes buying nice things. She likes fashion, and she has some habits from Catholic school, still. She spends a lot of money on her friends and loved ones. She is sunshiney and injects bougie humour and fun into meetings. That doesn't mean that she knows nothing about the shitty world, and that she doesn't actively try to make ethical choices in her consumer behaviour and social commitments. She really dislikes the "Ohhhhh" moment coming from someone judging her for her privilege when someone tells her story to them. Why presume that people are shitty for no reason, damnit?

• Is sick of being mistaken as straight. On one memorable Pride, she was called "straight passing". She dislikes the term immensely. She thinks that people do not have the liberty to immediately assume that she is heterosexual because Marius is her partner. Similarly, people do not get to assume her sexuality because she presents stereotypically femme.

• She feels insecure and uncomfortable when people fix too much attention on her in relation to someone else, as if to scrutinize her. It happened twice amongst the Amis, once when Marius introduced her as his crush for the first time, and once when they came to know that she and Eponine knew each other since childhood, and that Eponine's parents were her abusive foster parents. She likes it better if she were befriended for being herself.

• She feels a little frustrated that people didn't get her conflicting feelings towards Eponine. People immediately assumed that she forgave and forgot everything Eponine had done or said when they were children, in her "characteristically sweet way". Actually, the first time she saw Eponine, her fear reared its ugly head again and she almost ran out of the Musain. There was much dancing around Eponine (who seemed worn out and super uncomfortable as well) and it is only with Marius and Courfeyrac's help that Cosette could start a conversion with Eponine. She did it not be particularly forgiving (though she eventually forgave her anyway), but because she needed to leave her emotional baggage behind and move on.

• A large part of Cosette's forgiveness towards Eponine was fuelled by the knowledge of Eponine's own abuse at her parents' hands. As someone who had faced quite a bit of the same abuse, she needed to put her foot down. Cosette was extremely angry about it, and her anger made sure that Eponine could separate from her parents faster, and eventually get custody of her siblings.

• She hates, hates, hates it when people remind her that she's lucky to get an adoptive father like Valjean particularly after she has a row with him. Just because her foster parents were shitty doesn't mean that she cannot speak against some of Valjeans imperfections! And children often disagree with their parents. She doesn't need to be dampened with the idea that she should basically think Valjean to be perfect because of her past. She is fiercely loyal to Valjean, and doesn't need anyone to test that.

• Cosette is protective of Marius. No one gets to mow Marius over with judgements and snide comments. In fact, Marius found himself being not so much the butt of jokes anymore after Cosette teaches him to stand up for himself. At the same time, Cosette does not helicopter parent Marius. She does tease him within limits, and does not usually interfere when he has disagreements with the Amis. It is a fine balance which does exhaust her sometimes.

• Cosette can be mischievous, even impish. She can land punches (whether they hurt or not doesn't matter), ace paintball/mudslinging matches, play the best pranks on April Fool's Day and curse like a sailor if needed. She is especially proud of the wide-eyed look she still gets from some of the Amis at her antics. She can also get people out of trouble faster than you can say "bail".

Marius:

• Marius feels scared of being judged. It is really, really difficult to understand your own privilege when you come from a super rich, super bigoted family (read grandfather). He has taken lots of embarrassing knocks and call-outs every day till now, but he is learning, and learning fast. The Amis know, and for them he isn't some peripheral person anymore, but an integral part. But sometimes he wakes up with nightmares of being kicked out as a wokeboi and a fraud by the whole group. He often stumbles over his words because he panics that maybe what he is trying to say is problematic. It takes him months to take any initiative in the Amis because he suffers from imposter syndrome all the time.

• Marius hid all information about his favourites (he loves strawberry rosé macarons and silver needle tea, for instance) because he thought that he would be judged as a rich brat. Funnily, it was Ferre who had figured these out and was the first Amis to give him a small tea chest and a box of macarons as a birthday gift (followed closely by Courf and Jehan with a huge birthday party). It took time for Marius to understand that just because he got a bit panned for his political opinions the first time, it doesn't mean that the Amis hate him.

• Quite unlike popular belief, Marius and Ferre do get along very well. They share a lot of niche interests (poring over etymology dictionaries and having a love of museums and trivia nights). They did discuss that first "to be free" moment, and Marius had placed his request to be given more chances to undo his problematic stances. (There was also another "to be free" moment that had left Ferre stunned, but it's a them thing). It hurts Marius when people immediately think that he's probably annoying Ferre when they hang out.

• Marius is not stupid. Please. The whole idea people have that he is stupid because of his awkwardness and shyness is plain mean at times. No, he doesn't need to be talked to slowly, like talking to a child. Whenever he has the courage, he brings up a lot of valid points in Musain meetings. He is extremely resourceful in handling money and talks with boring rich people, and fundraisers have never been better without him. He is juggling a double Masters degree with internships and volunteer services, and picks up languages at the drop of a hat (including Elvish).

• Marius has also had that dangerous phase when, in a bid to be as radical as possible, he fell into trouble way too many times. Even the most even-tempered of them all (read Jehan) has outright cried in exasperation on finding Marius glaring at a policeman in a protest, promising to burn the place down with a flare if they didn't back off from hitting protestors. Marius has similarly taken punches and hits, and there was a time when Joly would hover around him to administer first aid as quickly as possible. It took Enj and R a whole day to explain to him the merits of self-preservation and that revolution today does not necessarily involve a militant loss of life.

• Marius has also that phase when he drove a college sophomore to tears with his radical speech. Aka attacking the heck out of the kid's problematic Facebook post. Cosette had to give him a talk. Marius is learning about how to be a zealous but kind activist every day.

#marius pontmercy #cosette #les miz #les amis #les mis #les miserables #marius and cosette are such sweethearts #marius is an underrated noodle boi #modern au #les mis as #ferret's freshly microwaved post

[bqstqnbruin]

Three times he said it as a friend and once as something more

Hello, hello. I’m still working on the Nick Robertson request but wow I don’t want you to hate me for it because it is actual trash right now and I’m sorry. But I’m also working on B&W part 3, so there’s that!

This was requested from that fluffs prompt list, which I think I’m done with now because honestly, it’s so far deep at this point, and I’m so lazy.

I hope you like it!

46. Why should we date?

47. Because we’re attracted to each other

48. I’m attracted to pie, but I do not feel the need to date pie.

__________________________

one

“Next time I see you, I really do expect you to be a professional athlete,” you tell Charlie, the two of you laying on a blanket in his backyard, enjoying the last few hours of sunlight on his last night in town. The next morning, he would be leaving to go to BU to play hockey. It wasn’t even that far, but him not living at home, and you going to school in Vermont meant him no longer driving you to school each morning, you no longer going over with dinner your mom made when she knew he and his parents were running around because of his games, no more walking next door whenever you needed to talk to instead of calling him. The memories would last forever, but those moments were now just part of the past.

“Are you not gonna come see me play at BU at all? What about when we play UVM?” he says, turning his head to look you.

Turning to him, you roll your eyes, “Ok, fine. Then I expect you to be a professional athlete in the next three years.” 

“Whatever,” he says, laughing. 

You sit there in silence, taking in what is probably one of the last moments for a while that you two will be able to spend a lot of time together. 

“Remember how we became friends?” he asks, sitting up. 

You follow suit, laughing at the memory that he just triggered. You were neighbors since your family moved to Weymouth, but you weren’t automatically friends because of it. “Well, duh. We sat across from each other in Family Consumer Science. We, of course, always finished the work early because we’re great, and we played pencil hockey for like thirty minutes before Mrs. Grace yelled at us for distracting the other two at our table.”

“The fact that you ever finished your work fast in that class is still amazing. You get distracted by everything and can’t focus on anything.”

“Yeah, well,” you shrug it off. You sit there thinking of all the other good memories you had with him; sitting across from each other in US history and joking about all the mistakes you made while texting, the nights when you would walk around Boston Common once your parents trusted you out on your own, the last minute Bruins tickets he would get and force you to go along with him to the games.

“Did you ever think about what our lives would have been like if we dated?”

“What?” you ask, shocked. There was no way the two of you would ever date. He was destined to be a professional hockey player, traveling the US and Canada with whatever NHL team wanted him. You could never date someone that wasn’t going to be there when you needed them. And you couldn’t ask him to give up your dream for you. Yes, you were overthinking this, but best case scenario is that you had dated throughout high school and ended things tonight.

“Most people thought we were dating, anyway. What if we actually had?”

“Then we probably would have broken up tonight because long distance relationships from high school never work. Look at Andrea and Eric from last year, she went to Holy Cross and he only went to UConn and they could never make it work so they broke up. Or Josh and Maggie two years ago; he went to Ohio and ended up transferring to UMass so he could be with her and he loved Ohio State.”

“Too bad we never even gave it a chance.”

You look at him, shocked. “Did you want to?”

His only response was shrugging, a smile on his face as he lays back down on the blanket. You stay sitting up, thinking about what he just said. Did he want to date you all this time and never said anything until now? And why the hell would he do something like that anyway? You weren’t going to see him until at least Thanksgiving, which means that now you have to hyper fixate on this one memory until you see him again. 

“Hey,” he says, snapping you out of it.

“Yeah?”

  “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” 

two

Your phone lights up, causing you to tear your eyes away from the essay you had been writing that’s due in a few hours. Due to your great talent for procrastinating, you were, of course, finishing the paper at the last minute. The picture of you two in the Coyle’s front yard on your first day of school in six grade shows up on your screen, meaning Charlie was calling you. It had been forever since the two of you last talked; with you being in school and him trying to make it as a hockey player in Minnesota, your schedules never gave you a free moment to talk for more than a passing moment. 

“Hey, stranger,” you say, not hiding the smile on your face even though you were out in public. You hated showing any sort of emotion that would provoke someone to come up to you and start talking to you, but seeing Charlie’s name come up on your phone with something other than a text automatically made you smile. 

“Stranger? You know who I am.” You could tell by his voice that he was jokingly acting offended. 

“Yeah, you’re Zach Parise, right?” you tease.

You hear the laugh you miss so much on the other end, “How have you been?”

“Uh, stressed, lately, so nothing new.”

“Why?”

“Homework, papers, and exams.”

“Oh, my.” You both start laughing at the accidental joke he made, “Why so much stuff?”

“It’s midterms, babe.” 

“So I assume that you’re working right now?”

“Yep, it’s eight pm, the paper is due at midnight and I still have four more pages to write.”

` “I’m so glad that your work ethic hasn’t changed since high school.”

“Ok, rude! I have good work ethic, I just also have strong procrastination skills.”

“You probably have ADHD,” he says.

“Well, yes, but that’s a different story.”

“What’s your weekend look like? I want to catch up when you don’t have a lot of work to do.”

“Uh, I should be good.”

“Alright, get back to the paper.”

“I will. Love ya.”

“Love you, too.” 

three

“Oh, come on! We practically live together. You can’t deny that something is going on between us!” Charlie argues, pacing around the kitchen as you make dinner. This conversation between the two of you was becoming a weekly one, slowly getting on your nerves to the point where you would consider moving just to get away from it. 

“Because what happens if we break up? We’ve been friends since we were in middle school. Do you really want to throw all that away?” you say, turning to him, putting your hand on your hip. 

“I just think we should go out as more than friends just once.”

“And how would that be different than all the other times that we go out together?”

“Because then I could do things like hold your hand and flirt with you?”

“I’m like ninety percent sure you already flirt with me.” 

“Y/N.”

“Why should we date, Charlie?”

“Because we’re attracted to each other?”

“And I’m attracted to pie, but I do not feel the need to date pie,” you roll your eyes, turning your attention back to the stove. 

“You’re seriously equating me to pie right now? I have never seen you eat pie, therefore, that argument is invalid.”

“Since when do you say things like therefore, and invalid?” 

“Seriously, Y/N. You know I have wanted to date you since we were in middle school, but something always came up. You know I love you. You know I always have.”

You turn back to him, trying to make eye contact, but something in you just can’t. Your timing was never right. Once you were old enough to date, the two of you were never single at the same time. Actually, that isn’t true. You were both single for a brief period of time while he was playing with the Sea Dogs and you were still at UVM. This was the first time that both of you were single and in the same town. 

“Charlie, you know that I love you, too. But this can not happen. We can’t risk breaking up and ruining what we have.” 

He exhales, obviously disappointed. You were, too, but you couldn’t let that show. You wanted nothing more than to be with him, but you couldn’t let all those years of friendship go away if things didn’t work out between the two of you. “Fine.”

once

“Remember when you wouldn’t date me?” he asks over the sound of everyone around you.

“Remember when you were less annoying?” you roll your eyes. You look around to see so many other couples and families filling in the tables around you. Everyone looked so happy, just like you were. 

You and Charlie had been together now for a year, him finally wearing you down and convincing you to let him take you on a date. He promised you that even if you stopped dating, your friendship would never end because, at this point, you were in too deep anyway. He told you he had this whole evening planned for your anniversary, complete with a walk around the Boston Common like you used to do when you were kids, dinner at Terramia, your favorite restaurant, and for dessert, he was taking you to Mike’s Pastries for the cannoli you loved so much. 

“No, never,” he smirks, reaching out across the table to take your hand.

You had to admit, all the things he had said trying to convince you to date him were right; nothing was really that different between the two of you besides the intimacy that wasn’t there before. “You’re never letting me live that down, are you?”

“No.” 

You roll your eyes at him. You didn’t want to inflate the ego of the man who didn’t even know how to use the oven by telling him he was right that you two dating was fine. 

“Hey,” he says, like that last night before he went off to college.

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

You smile, thinking back to all those times you told each other those three words, them meaning something completely platonic. “I love you, too.” 

#charlie coyle #charlie coyle imagines #boston bruins #boston bruins imagines #bruins #bruins imagines #hockey #hockey imagines #nhl #nhl imagines #i think it might be cheating since i used them all in a row i'm sorry oops

[spockandawe]

For the ask meme, 3, 9, 11?

Let’s see! 

3. Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

Hmmm. Never for a one-time bad take, but I’ve definitely done it for repeated hot takes that just got exhausting. Off the top of my head, for at least a year and a half, I was following an out-and-out anti, because they blogged a lot about published sf/f literature, which is a subject I find interesting, though i got real good at spotting posts that would annoy me fast and skimming past them. I unfollowed them earlier this year, because they’d made an ominous post about tamysyn muir being ~problematic~ and like, I’d been reading her fic since ye olde homestuck days, c’mon. And I was COMPLETELY committed to fully enjoying Harrow The Ninth, so I unfollowed before I could see them start picking apart that book in that chasing-absolute-ethical-purity way I’d seen them do with other things. And right now, I can think of at least one person I follow who mostly posts content I enjoy, occasionally posts hot takes I strongly disagree with, but the bulk of my experience has been enjoyable, so I keep following

(I will say that the fandom opinions most likely to get me to throw up my hands in disgust are when someone looks at a complicated, messy situation and irons out the nuance in favor of labeling one character an abuser/predator/etc. Sometimes a character is evil and abusive and never felt a moment of empathy in their life, but most of the media I consume tends to be more complicated than that and it often feels like people are being deliberately obtuse (whether or not they actually are) and it annoys me)

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

Ooh. Mmmmm. This is hard. I really enjoy finding the right angle to like as many characters as possible on purpose, but... lemme see, let’s pick one for each mxtx book.

SVSSS: God, it’s gotta be zhuzhi-lang. After reading the extras, I dislike him less, but mostly what I’m left with is that he DEPRESSES me. And he just... profoundly makes no impression on me. I forgot he even showed up in i wish you were my husband, I tried to argue with my friend that he was never there. 

MDZS: Jin Guangshan is the easy cheating answer, but it’s right :P And I honestly can’t think of other characters I dislike until you get into, like, Wen Chao and company. I love all of the central characters, even while they’re emotionally tearing each other to shreds and breaking my heart

TGCF: Lord, this is definitely Qi Rong. I know he’s basically a cartoon goblin, but he’s just......... such an asshole. I am... capable of feeling sympathetic emotions towards him, but also, I just desperately want to yeet him into the sun.

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

HM. Hmmm. I’m really bad at gauging fandom opinions that way XD I will cheat and dip back into transformers and say that I would DIE for Pharma and all of his assholeish, murderous glory. OH, you know what? Shen Jiu. I love him to pieces. Also in all of his assholeish glory, though with maybe a little less murder than Pharma. I think a lot about how svsss is a comedy from Shen Qingqiu’s point of view and a tragedy from Luo Binghe’s, but Luo Binghe’s pov is the kind of tragedy I enjoy thinking about, while the tragedy from Shen Qingqiu’s point of view is the kind that just... upsets me. God, I need to get back to writing the diet bingge verse, because Shen Qingqiu is alive and VALUED and it’s important to me XD

#spock replies #ask memes #Anonymous

[vroenis]

When The Best You Can Do Is Shoot A Gun

The Animal Crossing / Doom Eternal Covid19 launch coincidentally seems to be related to this discussion, even tho I’d say Doom Eternal has an excellent combat system and isn’t really relevant to what I’m going to bring up. I don’t have a problem with shooty-shooty, I have purchased, played and will continue to purchase and play plenty of video games that engage with firearm violence. There are plenty of discussions about how intelligent, consenting adults can do this without any problems and I won’t retread them here. Doom is simple game themed vaguely around demons; demons bad, player protagonist good, good player shoot bad demons - OK you got it, apply an incredible movement system into that and enjoy.

What I want to discuss involves of-course that pesky word and idea nuance, which annoys the shit out of more people these days, for its applications and misapplications - fingers-crossed I don’t fuck it up, but first I want to bring up Ubisoft and systems, so now’s as good a place as any for a stolen picture from the internet.

As far as concept art goes, that’s actually very representative of the final product in-game.

Ubisoft appear to have a long-term open-world tech development objective. I believe at some point very soon, these individual objectives will converge into one single middleware product with a mandate to producce retail licenses that combine what each of these individual franchises have been testing and achieving in isolation, those being;

Ghost Recon Wildlands and Breakpoint: 3rd person Load-On-Demand

The Division: 3rd Person Cover and interactivity

Assassin’s Creed: Environmental mapping and interactivity

Starlink: Scaling Load-On-Demand

Far Cry: First Person implementation of various combinations of above

I’ll put it another way;

Ghost Recon: Load everything

The Division: stick to everything

Assassin’s Creed: climb everything

Starlink: scale everything

Far Cry: do it in first person perspective

It looks like all of these games are running in Ubisoft in-house proprietary engines. Ghost Recon and Assassin’s Creed are running in Anvil, developed for the very first Assassin’s game and in which the Prince of Persia 2008 and Forgotten Sands also ran in. Oddly, (Rainbow Six) Seige, Steep (lol) and For Honor are also running in Anvil.

Both Division games and Starlink are running in Snowdrop and this appears to be due to The Division having come from Massive Entertainment. I’ll be honest, from the perspective of a consumer (read: punter) and someone with extremely minimal 3rd-hand development experience, The Division looks far more impressive than both the Ghost Recon and Assasin’s games, and former Massive brand and art director Rodrigo Cortes has said of the engine that it was design to “do things  better not bigger” and I think it shows. Anyway, it was still developed with Ubisoft so as I understand it, they own it. Massive is a Ubisoft subsidiary, their studio based in Sweden.

Far Cry is going to be a little different, being a little older and having its roots slightly before... what shall we call this mess... the cynical age? The microtransaciton age? Anyway. The first game used the CryEngine developed by Crytek. At some point, Ubisoft seemed to develop an offshoot of the engine called Dunia because the CryEngine was licensed and clearly lucrative, I think. I’m not entirely sure, but Dunia does appear to remain in-house and under the auspices of Ubisoft Montreal. Where am I going with all this?

Starlink was “toys to life” a-la Skylanders but way too late, combined with No Man’s Sky-lite, but the game itself other than being overstuffed with Ubisoft copy-and-paste template-quests is an excellent proof of concept.

I do need to say that in general, I don’t have any particular affinity for Ubisoft. So I am yes, absolutely fascinated with something I do think is happening as far as tech goes and now I’m writing about it in this piece, and yes you can tell I’ve played and even enjoyed some of the games they’ve produced and published, but there’s a lot not to like about many of their practices, the least of which is the overbearing sense of cynicism pervasive in many of their games.

I played Far Cry 3 long after it released and got perhaps 20% thru the campaign before giving up entirely. For starters, nothing about how it controlled felt right and I appreciate that’s purely a personal preference. Being a Battlefield player, there’s something about DICE’s sense of locomotion that is perfect to me, even tho it varies from title to title from Bad Company 2 all the way to V most recently. Other things about Far Cry bother me tho - if there’s wildlife around, it always attacks the player, guaranteed. Everything about this game seems to be designed to force the player into engagement, to provide you with materials to collect, craft or sell, but also to run you short of ammunition to either scrounge for more or have to buy it because *surprise* - it prompts you to purchase ammunition for real-world money. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? Fuck off. I uninstalled the game immediately. I can deal with ridiculous AI with magical aim and irrational scripting. I can deal with absurd narrative for the sake of reading (and roasting later), but the entire package culminating in purchasing more ammunition was otherworldly, it was truly bizarre. To this day, I don’t understand what world Ubisoft inhabits that this is something that makes sense to anyone in management or marketing, and yet there it is and there are consumers that not only accept it but embrace it. No doubt there are metrics from the mobile industry that support it and dear lord the capitalist apocalypse is upon us.

What will Ubisoft do when they can merge these technologies? They definitely want to and likely already have in-house, they just need the engine to run client-side for the Consumer. You and I and Inside Gaming are all laughing it up at Stadia right now, but we’re at the wrong end of the business. For Ubisoft, they can ignore the faltering at the start, it’s the long-term they focus on. The pittance Google are losing now, even if they end-up shuttering the project will be meaningless if they end-up getting the hardware to work, even if the end-result is the hardware sitting in a box in the consumer’s home in 10 years. Sure, that’s a long loop, but the journey still doesn’t matter, only the eventual ROI.

If this piece hasn’t gotten boring for you yet, it’s about to because you’re probably excited for what Ubisoft will do with this impending technological power and development and I rally am not. What will Ubisoft do with it? Probably just more Assassin’s Creed, except you’ll be able to snap to cover and have a fully mapped country. Probably more The Division, but you’ll have a fully mapped city that you can also climb on the outside of buildings and then enter them without any loading. Probably more Far Cry but with bigger maps and more interactivity and less loading. The next generation of consumer hardware consoles from Microsoft and Sony are upon us and as much as PC enthusiasts hate to admit it, the consumer market is largely gated by the generational hardware stepping of these platforms. That may change after this era depending on how Google, Amazon and indeed Microsoft and Sony go with cloud computing, but for the moment the status-quo will remain as alternative products develop. Bear in mind with Covid19, climate change and the general sustainability and ethical standards of working and living being under growing scrutiny the world over, things are changing more each day, our technology development may change in ways we don’t expect so who even knows what’s in store for the future.

So What Do I Actually Want?

Good question. NB: before you ask, Animal Crossing isn’t my thing. I played it years ago on Gamecube. It’s cute, it’s fine. I’ve no interest in it. I’m writing this note in retrospect because I realise you may say “Just play Animal Crossing or The Sims but hopefully I can illustrate by neither of those games is what I’m after, nor do I just want to build a house in something like No Man’s Sky and fill it with crap. Let’s see if I get there... A few weeks ago I wrote about how the best thing Naughty Dog did with Uncharted 4 was Elena and Nathan’s domestic spaces. I did purchase The Division 2 on the cheap a couple of weeks ago and I’ll be honest, there’s a lot about it that I’m enjoying quite a bit. For a start, visually it’s stunning. The art team have done an excellent job of both filling the world with immense detail, but also making every area of Washington unique and distinct which is a huge feat given the total space covered. Thus far, I’ve spent a whole lot of time just walking around and gathering resources, in part just to sightsee and explore without any particular objective in mind. After a while, I got the impression that the map was a bit flat, but the more you explore, the more you find places where you get verticality, and then doing missions always adds verticality and variety in environmental and art design, it’s a marvel to see.

Apologies to James and Thomas (above) for ripping these images, but I’m glad your names are in frame so you have direct credit - outstanding work. The art in this game is without question its strongest element.

And that’s just the thing - The Division is an interesting game in that what I enjoy most is the sense of walking around exploring, gather resources and helping people. I’m not here on an anti-violence kick - I play Battlefield, I actually don’t mind the shooting in The Division, it’s fine, whatever, I’m not going to justify that. What I’m saying is that it gets boring.

THERE ARE A LOT OF GAMES ABOUT SHOOTING.

Like... a lot. More than enough. There will always be a lot of games about shooting and that’s fine. I think I’ll always play them. Hey, I even play games about shooting *in very specific ways* - it’s not like I don’t care about the shooting, I’m playing The Division with only a bullpup DMR and shotgun combo, plus I’m trying to use my sidearm when traversing the streets as much as possible so don’t at me, I’m in the game.

But we seem to mostly get high detail assets in games with guns because shooty games get all the money. I get it - shooty games get all the sales because we as gamers like to play them - sure, I’m one of them, but I didn’t buy The Division until it was under AUD$30 because gotdam the shooting is so boring and even now yes, it really do be just more boring shooting, just like it’s boring in Uncharted, just like it’s boring in Ghost Recon (my goooooood so boring), just like it is in Destiny, and the umpteenth shooty mcshooty game. I’m getting too old for this.

Uncharted 4 had an opportunity to do something more and it almost did. For many players, it probably achieved enough of what I was after by those two visits to the Fisher and North residences but I wanted so much more of that. I want to see Sully’s house or houses, more of his life. I want to know where Chloe’s life is at. I want to know of their lives and emotional engagements outside of the frankly stupid narrative I have no interest in because it’s clearly stupid and an excuse for running and jumping that other games have since done better. If Uncharted as a whole was a subtext for character, then by the fourth game, the focus should have been the characters that carried the series thru to the end - no disrespect to Tom Baker - not the heretofore unrevealed older brother.

For Years I Didn’t Know “Walking Simulator” Was A Pejorative

I think this is why I replayed and continue to replay Dear Ester so much. I remember laughing my ass off at YouTubers making videos about how it wasn’t a game and that it didn’t have objectives. Yet there were still threads and might still be on reddit or Discord wherever gamers congregate these days - about “virtual tourism” and “just chillin’ in place x because it’s so awesome” etc. It’s fine, each generation will rediscover virtual tourism again and again and we can’t denigrate anyone for doing so, it’s certainly nothing we invented given it comes from literature and oral tradition before that, but it’s remarkable that there’s this resistance to experiences crafted purely for the purposes of being immersed in them.

I adore Dear Ester and Everybody’s Gone To The Rapture. Absolutely loved What Remains Of Edith Finch and only if you have already played Edith Finch, because it’s full of spoilers but also its own spoiler warnings, I heartily recommend Joseph Anderson’s outstanding video The Villain of Edith Finch. It’s a 53 minute watch so I won’t embed it, and he has a certain style of presentation that won’t gel with everyone, nor do I always agree with everything he says which should go without saying but at some point folks, you have to stop pursuing art, criticism and media that just wholly aligns with your own views. That said, I generally do find most of what he says agreeable, innit. Anyway he’s great and the video is great.

While Dear Esther is more surreal and Rapture and Edith Finch are in part slightly more fantastical than the real-life settings of Uncharted 4′s home and Division’s post-apocalyptic cities, they all visually represent dense, very human object-rich spaces that to me are quite interesting to explore. Dear Esther might be a little more rooted in nature but its human elements tie-in to its narrative in an extremely interesting way. Each game offers different levels of interaction, some that serve the narrative directly, some as subtexts and others quite mildly in the periphery.

I’m sorry if I’m repeating myself but I remember seeing a promo for Battlefield Hardline coming off the back of Battlefield 4 and the ridiculous marketing phrase “levolution” - the term they coined for large-scale environmental destruction (please take the keys away from the marketing department). I remember seeing video footage of a large construction crane falling in a level and thinking

“All this intelligence, all this tech, and this is what we do with it? Is this all we can achieve? This is it?”

That’s how I feel about this emerging technology. Somewhere out there (on YouTube, to be fair), there’s all this footage buried of the Beyond Good And Evil sequel that to everyone’s knowledge is still in development. I’d put my money on that being the first project built in Ubisoft’s convergence engine that they hope successfully implements everything that each of these games executes individually. I know the BG&E fans are frothing for it and when I saw those early demos, what I interpret of the tech did blow me away, but from an experience perspective, I did still think the same thing...

“Is this it?”

Because of-course, a huge part of the new game is going to be combat. I just - don’t - care. When I think about what was lacking in Uncharted 4, what I wanted more of, it was intimacy. What didn’t I like about the conversation and resolution between Elena and Nathan? About the tours of their homes, the little time spent playing as Cassie, the few insights into Sully as a character, the absence of Chloe who was such a great contrast to Nathan, Elena and Sully all-together... it was intimacy. Yea oroight, so I don’t exactly mean the type of real-life intimacy between lovers, do I - that much is clear. But if I don’t mean shooty because there’s enough of that, and I’m leaning into domestic detail and emotional exploration and reflections of that in objects, spaces and interactivity, then that’s what I mean.

Tho I’m loath to bring it up, I feel like in the worst possible way, David Cage is right on the periphery of this discussion (and for that reason, I ain’t tagging him or his games in this entry, get fucked). He has the most vague notion of trying to ground his games in the intimacy of human experience, so he tries to tie human locomotion and objects to the digital representations of interactivity. If we take those as perhaps the worst possible examples and then come back to some really good examples in Uncharted 4 so I can stop whipping it - I maintain that the house tours are strengths and the high-points of the game, and then look at something like The Division and consider opportunities for more complex interactivity centred around helping people and emotional engagement, I feel like that’s what I’m after.

Which is impossible, right? No-one’s going to make a game even a quarter of the scope of The Division, with all that amazing dynamic lighting, with all those awesome textures and mapped objects, animations, rigged character models, complex scripting and AI, interactivity, load-on-demand tech and full voice-talented support, just to be a game about exploring, sightseeing, meeting and learning about people and helping them? Because who would play that?

I would, for a start.

#video games #videogames #better start taging in the single word version #ubisoft #ghost recon #the division #assassin's creed #starlink #far cry #video game development #Dear Ester #What Remains Of Edith Finch #Joseph Anderson #Beyond Good And Evil #Uncharted #Uncharted 4 #Battlefield #Levolution #game development #chrono #2020 #housekeepingtags #writing about games #writing about video games #writing about videogames

[vfdbaudelairefile13]

                                  Chapter Thirty-Four:

                          The One With Olivia's Proposition

Jacques Snicket had the displeasure of listening to Count Olaf laughing maniacally all the way back to the town’s jailhouse. Jacques turned to Esme, “Can you please hit him with that baton?”

Esme looked down at the baton in her hands and then at Olaf, who was moving his sunglasses just a bit to wipe tears of maniacally blissful joy from his eyes. She looked to Jacques, her face stricken with contemplation. “Honestly, darling, I’m debating it,” she said after nearly two minutes of silent contemplation.

The disguised villain took a deep breath, heaving over to clutches his sides. He tried to muffle his laughter but he couldn’t. Esme opened the door to the jailhouse as Olivia Caliban swiftly put the bobby pins she was using to fashion a lockpick into her pocket. She glared at the villains as one stormed in pushing her associate and the other was laughing like an insane person. “What’s so funny?” Olivia asked confused.

“That’s my question,” Jacques explained.

Esme pushed Jacques into the steel bars of the jail cell. Pinning his face to them. “You leave my boyfriend alone,” she said as she opened the cell door and shoved the handcuffed man inside, slamming the door as she turned to her boyfriend. Olaf continued to laugh like a drunk hyena.

“Darling, seriously,” Esme said annoyed. “You’re getting on my damn nerves,”

Olaf fell into his chair, wiping his eyes again. He took a deep breath. “Did you see the look on her face?” He asked, wheezing. “Even the boy’s face was golden when he realized I wasn’t captured!”

Jacques glared at him as Esme just shook her head irritated. She rolled her eyes. “You need some help,” Jacques hissed.

“You must have missed her face,” Olaf noted as he finally stopped laughing.

“You’re not going to get away with this,”

“Oh, but I already have. Soon you’ll be dead and those brats will be mine,” Olaf said as he stood up to make himself a cup of tea. He looked back to see Jacques glaring at him.

“Violet will defeat you,” Jacques warned him angrily.

“Like Lemony?” Olaf asked as he chuckled. “I’d offer you tea, but they’re all sweet and fruity,” He explained as Jacques glare intensified.

“Sweet and fruity doesn’t count as tea,”

“Is that your opinion or the cults?” Olaf interjected rolling his eyes.

Jacques continued to glare. “And your scheme is equally dismissible,”  

Olaf smirked in response. “Strong words for someone in a deluxe cell,” he smiled. “So what happened to handing me over to the police chief and sending me to jail for a really long time?” he asked mockingly.

“It never occurred to me that your girlfriend would be as treacherous and violent as you,” Jacques commented bitterly.

Olaf growled. “You’ve never approved of my love life,” he spat bitterly.

“No,” Jacques corrected. “I never approved of Kit’s love life. She always deserved better than you. And now she has it,”

Olaf’s face turned dark. He took a quick glance to see where Esme was. The diva was not in earshot. “What do you mean?”

“I want what’s best for those I respect and admire,”

“No, not that part,” Olaf hissed. “What do you mean now she has it?”

“It’s none of your business, but I heard sources say she’s with Dewey Denouement now. She doesn’t need you. She’s better off without you,” Jacques hissed.

Olaf growled angrily but his face showed a softer side. "That fucking bitch..." he muttered.

Jacques sighed rolling his eyes. “Look,” he said after a minute. “Maybe I can level with you here Olaf,”

Olaf turned to Jacques confused. “Where do you think you have the upper hand?”

Jacques ignored the villain. He stared at his old friend, sincerity written on his face. “Olaf, you have a keen mind and a flair for the dramatic. When that saloon across town was a firehouse, you and I put some noble deeds on the books.” he began to explain.

Before Olaf’s face went from sorrow to fury. He glared at Jacques, removing his sunglasses to stare at the man with his shiny eyes. “ I’m tired of books, Snicket. ” he cried. Doing his best to keep his anger on the surface suppressing his hurt. “The world is dark and horrible, those children need to learn this sometime in their life. Why not right now?”

“And I thought Lemony was morbid and negative,”

“ The world is dark and horrible,” Olaf reiterated in a soft hiss. He sighed. “But do you know what makes it brighter?” he asked, his eyes becoming shiny again. “Sapphires. Money. Revenge. ”

“Revenge against who!? ” Jacques barked. “Those are children! God damn children! They are all younger than you were when that night happened! They had nothing to do with any of your pain!”

“Children will pay for the sins of their parents,” Olaf reiterated almost automatically.

“That’s bullshit and you know it!” Jacques yelled. “Beatrice and Bertrand burned! Just like you had wanted! Lemony…” Jacques choked.

“I don’t care if they burned. They didn’t suffer enough! They got to live happily with each other, with love, making a family...what about me?” he asked angrily. “I lost my parents, my friends, the love of my life... myself… all in one night!”

Jacques shook his head. “You don’t get to ask for my pity! Not after all this! ” he barked. His face red with anger. “I felt bad for you in the beginning, I did. But you allowed revenge to consume you!”

“They got to be happy while I…”

“While you sat there and felt sorry for yourself. Drowning your sorrows in bottles hoping to relieve the pain. But I must ask...did it? Did it ever relieve you of your pain?”

“No, but you know what did?”

“Causing pain on children that didn’t deserve it?” Jacques asked.

Olaf rolled his eyes. “Yes, actually. Destroying their precious children,” Olaf hissed. “Do you know the ecstatic high that I got when I cut up Klaus Baudelaire? When I kidnapped those goddamn twins?! When I bitch slapped the baby!? When I’ll be able to enact what I plan to do to Lemony’s little angel?”

Jacques’ face turned dark. The darkest that Olaf had ever seen. “ If you lay a finger on my goddamn niece!” He barked so loud. He punched the jailhouse wall to intimidate Olaf. “ You have me! You want to get your revenge on Kit? For hurting you? Do whatever you want to me! Let the kids and Olivia go!”

Olaf chuckled. “This isn’t about Katherine,” he explained. “This is about Lemony…”

“Lemony is dead!” Jacques admitted for the first time aloud. “He died in a fire! He lived a miserable life on the run after that night and he died young. Hasn’t he suffered enough? Isn’t that enough revenge for you?” he tried to look the villain in the eyes. To look for an ounce of humanity in this man.

Olaf glared at Jacques. Peering into his eyes to show that he meant no mercy. “He was happy enough to make and raise a child,” he pointed out.

“Violet didn’t do shit to you! None of these kids have!”

“Her mere existence is enough to make me want to destroy her. Same with those pesky Baudelaires and Quagmires.” He hissed. “I won’t rest until they’ve all suffered excruciating amounts of pain. Until they are entirely destroyed.”

“You won’t win,” Jacques argued. “You’re better than this bullshit,”

“You sound like Beatrice,”

“She was right,” Jacques pleaded. “If you reinvestigate your ethical priorities, you could help repair the world instead of filling it with smoke.”

Olaf rolled his eyes. “Really?”

“Olaf, let’s do some good work together?” Jacques asked. “What do you say?”

Olaf took a step closer to the cell. “What do I say?” he repeated, his voice feigning contemplation. He smirked towards Jacques as he began to scat loudly walking away.

Esme scoffed as she sat down in a chair in front of Olivia’s cell. “Orphans,” she said as she filed her nails. “ Nothing but trouble. Am I right?”

“No, you’re not,” Olivia hissed back.

“What did these droopy, desperate orphans ever do for you? Before you got mixed up with them, I’ll bet you had some kind of a life, a future. Now, look at you…” Esme took a good look at Olivia for the first time. She noticed the woman’s outfit, smiled to herself for a second. “Is that a corset?” she asked forgetting her point.

“Yes,” Olivia said as she reached out and grabbed Esme by the front of her outfit pulling her closer to the cell. Esme looked shocked at Olivia. “Look at me, a part of a noble and heroic organization, finally putting my innate physical dexterity and extensive training in library science to the purpose for which they were made.”

Esme rolled her eyes, not even trying to get Olivia to let her go. “Do all you bookish volunteers spout nonsense when you’re afraid.”

“I’m not afraid,” Olivia explained.

“Well, you should be,” Esme explained. She smiled. “What...do you think your boyfriend’s going to rescue you?” she began to chuckle.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Olivia corrected. “But I am going to rescue him.”

Esme snorted and chuckled louder. “Puh-lease,” she said. “Jacques Snicket isn’t going to make it to the morning,” Esme explained. “I’m so sorry if I didn’t make that clear.”

Olivia smirked. “Not if you unlock this cell and let us go.”

“And why the fuck would I do that?” she asked confused.

“Because I am a librarian,”

Esme gasped mockingly. “Oh, I am so scared,” she exaggerated.

“Don’t you see, Esme?” she asked. “Librarians know where to find things.”

Esme’s face dropped slowly.  “What kind of things?” her eyes widened as she glared at Olivia. Trying to see if Olivia was bluffing or not. But unfortunately for the eccentric diva, she was unable to read through Olivia’s poker face.

“Missing things,” the volunteer replied.

“Sto-stolen things?” Esme asked nervously.

“That’s right Esme,” Olivia said smiling. “If you let Jacques and me go, I will give you the location of the sugar bowl, ” she propositioned.

Esme reached for the keys so fast that Olivia was surely surprised by the woman’s quick decision. Esme nearly put the key in the hole of the lock. She glared at Olivia. “Location first,” she said desperately.

Olivia smirked as her face lit up with an idea. She looked to Esme, a pleading and desperate look on the vicious woman’s face. “On second thought,” Olivia started.

“You can’t go back on the deal,” Esme cried.

“I’m not going back on the deal,” Olivia reassured her. “I’m adding one more condition,’

Esme glared at the woman but looked to her desperately. “Anything...you just name it.” Esme pleaded.

Olivia’s smirk turned into a smile. “I will give you the exact location of your precious sugar bowl if you let Jacques and me go and…”

“What...what...what…?” Esme asked gripping Olivia’s wrists that still held her shirt.

“ You give me the location of Sunny Baudelaire and Duncan and Isadora Quagmire…” Olivia asked.

Esme’s face drained of color as she glanced from the woman to the keys in her hands to the disguised man who was in another room behind her as she contemplated her next move.

#violet snicket au #violet snicket #misery loves company #violet baudelaire #klaus baudelaire #sunny baudelaire #isadora quagmire #duncan quagmire #count olaf #detective dupin #esme squalor #officer luciana #olivia caliban #jacques snicket #lemony snicket #beatrice baudelaire #beatrice baudelaire ii #bertrand baudelaire #daniel handler #asoue #asoue au #asoue fanfic #asoue fic #asoue fandom #asoue fanbase #asoue books #asoue netflix #asoue movie #vile village

[shantiism]

Making Some Dietary Changes for the New Year? 10 Tips to Help You Stay on Track

Veganuary and Dry January are just a few of the goals people have been undertaking as a means of cleansing, changing, renewing, and growing.  How hard is it to cut something out of your diet or to radically transform your diet and your relationship with food?  While everyone may not become a sober vegan, there are many dietary changes people are undertaking – perhaps you are trying to cut meat out or eat smaller portions.  Whatever your goal is, it can be hard to consistently reach these goals without the right mindset (even with the right mindset).  Sometimes we feel imprisoned by our habits, which serve as obstacles to reaching our ethical and dietary health goals.  

Here are some tips for achieving your dietary and ethical goals while transcending those negative patterns and self-defeating habits.  I don’t claim to be a master of diets by any means, but I have made changes to my diet based off of ethical and environmental concerns and have been successful with this for over 10 years.  While I have been a vegetarian-pescatarian, I recently cut octopus and shrimp out of my diet due to octopi having complex brains and shrimp coming from Southeast Asian slave labor.  So I hear you, the struggle is real.

The Tips:

Change has to come from within – Do you truly feel inspired to make these dietary changes or do you feel pressure from someone close to you or is it to follow a trend?  When I became a vegetarian 12 years ago, I did it out of my own volition, and it was a personal decision.  No one told me to become one, and I was the odd woman out with most of my friends and family.

Think about the reasons for why you are doing what you’re doing – I became vegetarian mainly for ethical reasons. I had seen plenty of tortured animal videos and did a lot of research, so I realized couldn’t live with myself knowing that I was eating the flesh of beings that had suffered for unnecessary reasons.  I find that when you do something for ethical reasons, it is much easier to stay committed to your goal than when you do something for aesthetic reasons (e.g. I have to lose weight so I look hot in this bikini).  I am not saying that one reason is superior to another reason but if there is a firm connection between who you are as a person and your goals, it will be much easier to truly embody these goals than if they weren’t connected to your authentic sense of self.

Don’t forget why you made the choice to give up meat, dairy, eggs, etc. – Over time, it’s easy to forget all of the atrocious things that are happening to animals, other humans and the earth.  We grow comfortable in our bubbles and can be tempted to just eat that crispy piece of bacon or that refreshing ice cream.  It’s imperative to remind oneself during these periods of temptation that you are doing what you are doing for a principled reason.  I have plenty of friends and family members who eat meat and of course what they are eating can smell and look appetizing!  It’s easy to envy how many options they have when they eat out.  But when I am tempted, I think back to the videos of the cramped pigs, the artificially inseminated cows, etc., which ends up turning me off from the forbidden food item. I keep remembering that it’s the system (subsidized meat and dairy industries) that makes being a vegetarian/vegan harder.  It’s not intrinsically harder, but it would be much easier in a country where vegetarianism is more mainstream.

Take baby steps – If you feel overwhelmed by the prospect of never eating meat again, see how it goes for a month.  A month long goal can feel much more feasible and within reach than a lifelong goal.  While it takes longer than a month to break a habit (about 2 months), setting smaller goals can ensure more long-term success.  Right now, I am setting a goal to be sober for the month.  I would cry if I could never drink wine again, but just seeing how it goes for a month makes it much more feasible to not engage in Bacchanalian hedonism.

You’re not alone – It’s easy to experience alienation and isolation when it feels like you’re the only one committed to making these ethical changes.  I am oftentimes one of the few vegetarians when I eat out with friends, family, colleagues, etc. But remember that so many others are trying to do exactly what you are doing.  Now with the prolific internet and vast social media, it is easy to find a support network online as well as a plethora of helpful resources.  You’re not in this alone!  People have been trying to do what you are doing for years and have created resources based off of their experiences which makes it so much easier to change how one eats.  This leads me to my next tip…

Surround yourself with others who are doing similar things – This may not be possible for everyone but if you can, it is much easier to make these changes when others have already done so or are doing the same.  I can’t tell you how lovely it is to eat dinner and cook with fellow plant-based eaters.  Not only is it logistically and financially easier, but it is much easier to feel like you have a community, that you aren’t alone and that other people GET IT!  I’m not saying ditch your other friends, but know that surrounding yourself with others who are doing similar things make it much easier to reach your goals.

If at first you don’t succeed, dust yourself off and try again (Aaliyah would have been 40 this month, RIP) – It’s not the end of the world if you slip up and drunkenly eat that cheap pepperoni pizza that all your friends are eating.  No one is judging you but yourself (or the people who run the “Good Place”), so give yourself space to forgive yourself and try again.  Start with a blank slate.  What you eat is very personal; you are your own boss.

Don’t let others bring you down – You know how those annoying people can act when you tell them you’re a vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free, sober, etc., “Oh, don’t you just want to eat this steak?” “You’re no fun.” “I love how meat tastes too much so I could never become a vegetarian.”  Do you know what I do when I hear this?  I roll my eyes inside and have fun comebacks in my head.  “Oh, a dead tortured animal tastes good to you – you disgust me.”  “Meat doesn’t taste that great unless it’s seasoned well.  Vegetables can be seasoned well too and taste even better.  Just learn how to use some spices.”  However, I politely nod and say things like “I love how vegetables taste.  When seasoned correctly, they are even more delicious.”  “I feel energetic and great, I’m not tired all the time contrary to the stereotype.”  “There is plenty of nutrition in plant-based sources.”  

I could go on, but you get the general gist.  Sometimes other people have their own insecurities about what they eat/drink so they want to bring you down with them and wish they had the kind of self-control you have, so they act like a 5 year old when you tell them you’re a vegetarian.  Just move on and know that if we lived in a society where veganism/vegetarianism, etc. was mainstream, you wouldn’t be hearing such asinine remarks.

Learn how to cook – Cooking is such an excellent way of controlling what you eat and making it as flavorful as you’d like.  I learned how to cook when I first became a vegetarian in college considering that the vegetarian options on campus were unhealthy and bland.  Always having some spices on hand along with my best friend, olive oil, will keep you sane.  Here are some basic spices to always have on hand to make any vegetable taste delicious: salt, pepper, red pepper, Hungarian paprika, Smoked Spanish paprika, cumin, rosemary, cayenne pepper, and turmeric.  These liquids are also great for sautéing: olive oil, tamari/soy sauce, red wine/white wine vinegar, balsamic vinegar, rice wine vinegar, sesame oil, and dijon mustard.  While the rest of the world eats whatever, you at least control what goes in your kitchen (hopefully you can), what you cook, what you eat, and therefore what you consume.  I think of my kitchen as my vegetarian-haven where I take shelter from the meat-centric country I live in.  

Be cheap – You don’t have to spend a bunch of money on new ingredients, cookbooks, etc. to fulfill your goals.  Ingredients can be bought gradually.  Spices are cheap and so are the basic liquids for sautéing (olive oil can be expensive, but it is much healthier than canola/vegetable oil).  There are also so many free recipes and food blogs online that you don’t have to waste money on a cookbook.  I love cookbooks but if affordability is an issue, then don’t waste money on one.  

And don’t forget to have fun!  You are embarking on something new and exciting!  Eating the same food and doing the same thing can get really boring. Think of this as an opportunity to expand your horizons and experience something new and enriching.

If you’re interested in learning more about ethical eating, check out my food blog: https://www.chiveg.com

#Dry January #veganuary #whole30 #vegetarian #vegan #pescatarian #healthy living #ethical living #philosophy #chiveg #chicagovegetarian #foodblogger #feminist #affordableating #spices #vegetariancooking #vegetarianblogger #chicagofood

[isthatso7]

idk another part of my fic

a\n: this is my first attempt at writing if english( pls i need beta i suck

Title: Hyperspace blue

Characters: The Jedi Exile and Atton Rand

Basically, Exile and Atton meet on the Nar Shadaa under different circumstances. She works as a mechanic and he’s a smuggler.

UPD: posted it on AO3

Atton Rand woke up and sat up in his small, but cozy bed. His bedroom was filled with blue and pink glow from vibrant street signs and giant screens with giant faces on them. He needed to get ready; there was an another work waiting for him tonight. After a brisk shower and a scarce midnight breakfast he started to put his clothes on. He grabbed his old blaster with  holster from the desk and secured it to his belt. At last, he put on his ribbed jacket and left his rarely visited lair.

You know that feeling when your vessel is entering hyperspace? The sinking feeling in the pit of the stomach, the feeling of acceleration that pushes you back into the seat. For Atton Rand, this feeling was like coming home, something that meant comfort and safety. You are in the alternative reality made of white and blue lines, and outside observers can mistake your freighter for an innocent and beautiful comet. He knew it was weak consolation and ships still could explode while traveling at lightspeed, but he still relished the idea.

“I know a place where we can change vessel’s ID. The owner is an old, partially blind Sullustan, but he’s the best you can find. ” Rand’s partner in crime was a reasonable guy he met while trying to make a living in the refugee sector of Nar Shadaa. Atton never really liked the Serroco gang, mostly because they were easy to jump to conclusions, conclusions that usually lead to violence. This guy called them family. But he was smart and really knew his job so they got along very quickly.

“And also there’s a female mechanic working there, a pretty gal, but she’s not the talking kind, and Force knows I’ve tried.” He sighed and stretched his arms and put his hands behind his head. They’d successfully accomplished today’s mission, and now they needed to hide hijacked vessel. A few more hours and they’d enter Nar Shadaa’s orbit, a few more hours and they’d be changing vessel’s ID signature and bringing it to the client. Another simple job done. He’d fallen into the routine of odd jobs and got used to never knowing where he is going to meet new day again. When they’ve arrived to Tien’s place, it was close to nightfall on the Nar Shadaa. But it’s hard to tell what time of the day it was  because there was no sun above you head. There were only dim street lights and animated neon signs.

The workshop was desolate at this hour. There were no customers and Tien was nowhere to be seen. The only working light was above the workbench where was sitting a slumped female silhouette. They both approached her and she didn’t noticed them at first, too consumed in examining some droid part lying in front of her while sipping caffa from chipped mug.

The girl lifted her gaze from her work and the light from the lonely lamp fell on her face. She looked a lot like those Serroco refugees, always with the blaster in the hand, ready to fight for their territory, their little piece of freedom, trying to protect each other at all cost. Her locks were jet black and she had a few short braids in front of her left ear and in the back of her head, adorned with little wooden beads. Her monolid eyes stared at them, her right brow lifted in a silent question. She had an unusual eye color - usually people with black hair had brown eyes, but hers were green. But what did he know about genetics? He was just a smuggler.

“Hey, Kano, is Tien here?” asked Atton’s companion.

“Well, Gar, he’s sleeping, because it’s one AM.” She smiled weakly with a sleep-deprived gentleness in her eyes.

“And why are you up?”

“I can’t sleep”.

“You look like you’re going to pass out any minute, Kano.”

She shrugs, “Still can’t sleep.”

Hm. That’s the mechanic he was talking about, thought Rand.

“I and my friend are in need of some services from the boss of yours.” He ran his hand through his short hair and smiled tentatively. Kano got up and looked out the wide glass window behind her. She grabbed a rag from the table to wipe grease from her hands. The mechanic was wearing dark blue jumpsuit with dirty, worn-out military boots. She noticed their starship on the previously empty landing pad.

“You’ve got a new ship?” She eyed them warily.

“Yeah.”

“I’m going to wake him now.” Kano gulped leftover caffa and left.

***

Atton usually came around two or three times a week.

Sometimes he left the moment he got what he need.

Sometimes he tried to make small talk with the unfazed, steady and irreplaceable mechanic.

Usually, he started with: “Hello, Kano.”

And she would answer after a moment: “Hello, Rand.” And then she would put her face mask on to continue welding starship hull.

Sometimes he tried to ask her personal questions just to spite her. She made an impression of a person who probably was bullied in school, but never cared about it. An estranged girl that rarely let her thoughts to materialize in a form of spoken words.

“Do you live here? It seems like you’re always working.”

“I work every day.”  

“Why?”

She shrugged with a plasma torch recklessly swinging in her hand. Too cool to think about safety.

“What do you do after work?”

“I go home, take a shower, eat something, and fall asleep.”

“That’s really sad. Do you want to go out sometimes?”

“No.”

He rarely came around during the day, so most of his interactions with her happened during her night shifts in the poorly lit hangar or cluttered workshop. But he managed to catch the sight of little things about her. She had a stern gaze but a soft face. Her skin was sickly pale with a distinct green tinge. Her eyes were always looking at you with a hint of mistrust and suspicion, always watching out for sudden movements.

There was a look in her eyes that wasn’t obvious and he managed to catch a brief glimpse of it only once. But he understood it immediately. He saw them peeking through the cracks in her guise, eyes that reminded him of a wild animal, born and raised in the confines of a cage, malnourished and abused, only to suddenly become one day free and unrestrained.

“Why? Don’t you feel suffocated by loneliness?”

“There’s no need for your fake sympathy. I chose the job myself. I like it.”

Her smile was acidic. She knew he couldn’t figure out  what’s she was thinking about and tried to annoy her out of sheer curiosity. Or maybe he just didn’t care. Maybe he was acting like that with every person he found remotely attractive. Or maybe acting arrogant was just a part of smuggler’s professional work ethic.

“There’s no need to punish yourself, Kano. You deserve to have fun sometimes.”

“And you know how to have fun?”

“Yeah. A couple of drinks, beautiful companions and pazaak. And maybe some other stuff.”

She sighed and continued to repair broken protocol droid. Most of his jokes had zero effect on her. But he made her smile a few times. Atton would’ve never confessed to it, but he was proud of himself for doing that. That’s how he discovered most of her smiles were crooked and bleak. The only time he observed her having a beaming smile on her face was when she talked to an old rusty homicidal T1 utility droid.

***

Kano’s work attire never changed. She seemed to own at least dozen of navy jumpsuit, all in various state of weariness. He sometimes wondered what kind of clothes she wears outside work. He tried to imagine her in a sandy midi skirt and a ink blue jacket. But the jacket always turned to be very similar to the top of her jumpsuit, so he stopped and cursed his imagination. Usually he had no problem with imagining anyone in colorful outfit. Or without one.

“How old are you, K?”

He found out she hated when someone shortened her name. But she didn’t mind different pronunciations. Like, he heard people calling her “Kay-no“, “Kah-no” or even “Kah-nu”, but she never protested or corrected anyone.

“Don’t call me K, please.”

“So?”

“I’m almost thirty. And you, scoundrel?”

“Thirty-four.”

“Woaw.”

“What? I don’t look my age?”

“Really? Yes. What is the secret? You look twenty-two, flyboy.”

“That’s an ancient Sith technique. Only a few in this part of the galaxy know it.”

“Does it involve sacrificing a bunch of Jedi to an ancient Sith lord?”

“No. Just a lot of water and positive vibes.”

“Have you ever seen a Sith lord? A real one?”

“No, of course.”

“And you?”

“I haven’t too.”

“Do they really do that stuff?”

“I don’t know. I heard some stories, but you can never know the truth now that they’re gone.”

***

One day he strolled into the shop and Kano was wearing a white T-shirt. It hang a little bit loose. And that’s how he saw her pink burn scars all over her right hand and her neck. It only happened once. He tried asking how she got these scars, but she never answered. Hadn’t even stopped looking at the droid detail she examined.

“I’m going on a vacation,” She said suddenly when handing him the parts he asked for.

“Nice. Where to?”

“Telos IV.”

“If it was a decade ago, I would’ve been jealous of you. But now? C’mon, there’s nothing to see there. The ocean’s irradiated. Your skin will come off. Or the Citadel station will explode because of that shitty Peragus fuel.”

“They’re trying to rebuild. I’ve heard it’s beautiful in the zones where the atmosphere is restored. Almost like it was before.” She was delving into the old memories, he could tell it by her eyes.

“And who told you that? A shifty travel agent?”

“A friend of mine.”

“A friend? What kind of friend?”

Now he’s surprised. And maybe a little jealous. What, he thought she doesn’t have friends besides him?

“A kind that doesn’t lie about the peaceful landscapes.”

She wasn’t there the next time he visits. The almost blind Tien sat in her chair and a utility droid made a series of hostile  beeps following him around the shop until he left.

#atton rand #jedi exile #kotor 2 #my shitty writing #my fic #i'm suffering

[justjen523]

Cross Examination

Leon x Ichthys

Unable to deal with Ichthys’ usual antics Scorpio makes a deal with Leon. If Leon can catch him he has permission to discipline him as he pleases. For Leon apparently old habits die hard. 

Rating (M)

Warnings: This story has some non consensual elements.

     “Goddammit someone better catch that fucker.” Scorpio was pissed. While everyone in the Department had been working overtime on Zyglavis’ behest the problem child was up to his usual antics. It always ended in Scorpio filing a days worth of paperwork simply because Ichthys had zero self control and an impossible work ethic. 

     “Now what’d he do?” Dui stood when the Vice Minister entered the room, his eyes wide wondering just what Ichthys had managed to pull off in the middle of a department crisis. 

     “Seriously I don’t have time for this shit! Dui, have you even seen him this morn’n? Un-fucking-believable he’d pull this crap now. You know what? Fuck it. I’ll let Zig decide what to do with him.” As he turned to storm out of the room Leon, who had been quietly lounging in his typical chair spoke up.

     “You think that uptight square is pissed now just wait till he hears you can’t even do your job. Not that any of this is out of the norm for you guys. Just another typical day in the elite Department of Punishments.” Just as planned his words only further fueled Scorpio’s rage. Turning in the direction the voice had originated he was practically spitting vehemently.

     “The fuck you say to me Lion?” Dui dashed to Scorpio hoping to calm him some knowing full well his boss was in no frame of mind to deal with Leon’s chastising. Leon just snickered thoroughly enjoying himself.

     “Am I wrong?” Leon pressed, his smirk widening into an evil grin. He loved fucking with Scorpio, almost as much as his idiot boss. For a moment Scorpio started to push past Dui but when his subordinate reminded him they were already on borrowed time, the perfect plan came to mind.

     “Yeah? You think you can do better? Be my frickn’ guest. I ain’t got time to deal with you Wishes assholes on top of everything else. If you can catch that fish he’s all yours. Do whatever the fuck you want to discipline his annoying ass.” Without waiting for a response Scorpio turned and started to leave the room.

     “Do I have your word on that?” Leon asked now thoroughly amused at such a rare opportunity.

     “You deaf or somethn’?”

     “I’m just making sure, I don’t need any unexpected visits from Minister Ponytail ruining my day.” 

     “Like I said, he’s all yours.” With that Scorpio disappeared dragging Dui in tow.

     “This is certainly turning out to be quite entertaining. Now, to catch a fish.” Leon’s smile never left his face as he started to plot his next move.

**********

     It was such a simple yet perfect trap for that slippery fish and if he timed it just right the reward would be well worth all of this effort. Thanks to Karno’s unquestioning assistance at procuring and supplying the special restraints he had everything he needed to make the rest of his evening memorable. Now all he had to do was wait.

     Leon had returned to his comfy chair and sipped at his wine patiently awaiting his victim’s arrival. In the center of the otherwise empty room sat a plate piled high with taiyaki and a forged card from the goldfish saying it was a gift. There was absolutely no way that troublemaker would be able to resist. Sure enough, after several hours Leon watched carefully from the corner of his eye as Ichthys tiptoed into the room. His eyes were wide with excitement upon seeing his favorite treat, completely oblivious of the fact that he was walking into a deadly trap. Leon smiled sadistically with his fingers in place ready to snap the moment Ichthys’ hand touched the taiyaki. 

     Normally it would be such a simple thing to restrain him simply with a snap. However the amount of energy it would consume not only just to catch him but to keep him that way for an extended period of time would drain Leon of energy he’d rather not waste. For what he had in mind he needed every last bit of it and with these special restraints Ichthys would be unable to escape until Leon physically removed them himself. 

     As the Problem Child reached out and grabbed the fish shaped treat the snap that followed caused him to instantly drop it as something almost resembling a harness securely locked around him with a click. 

     “W-What?!”

     “Oh-ho! What do we have here?” Leon smiling sadistically finally slides from his chair holding the chain soundly attached to the strange harness. Ichthys’ eyes went wide as the ruler of Leo approached him with a predatory smile.

     “L-Leon? What are you...”

     “Seems I caught me a rare fish.” Ichthys backed away from the intimidating god until Leon yanked the chain forward with a smirk causing the young god to fall to his knees.

     “Well now, seems you’ve finally discovered your place problem child. Groveling at my feet..” Every time Ichthys tried to stand Leon further pulled the chain preventing him from getting back up.

     “Leon why?”

     “You dare ask me that after all the shit you’ve pulled?”

     “S-Scorpio will seriously be pissed if...”

     “Pffft. Who do you think gave me permission to do as I please in the first place?” 

     “No way! Scorps would NEVER agree to that.”

     “Oh-ho! So confident and brave to talk back to me. Maybe you forgot about a certain prank you pulled this morning. I’ve gotta say, you must have really gone over the top this time if he’s allowing me to punish you.” Suddenly all the color drained from the young gods face as he realized exactly what Leon was talking about.

     “Leon wait! I-I can totally explain!”

     “Save it. You’re mine.”

**********

     Leon dragged the young god into his ornate room before shutting and locking the door. He let go of the chain but kept the harness in place so that the problem child could not escape at a moments notice. He made his way to his bed before lounging comfortably and returning to his wine.

     “Well then, shall we begin your punishment?”

     “M-My punishment?! But you’re totally a Wishes god!”

     “Not tonight I’m not. Tonight you’re my source of endless entertainment. So, entertain me Ichthys, god of Pisces.” 

     “Ummmmm.....what exactly do you want me to do?”

     “I believe I already told you that I want to be entertained.”

     “....kaaaaay.....but like, how EXACTLY do you want me to do that?” Smiling dangerously Leon takes his time finishing his wine before setting the empty glass on the table beside his bed. Getting to his feet he slowly closes in on the troublemaker now visibly starting to panic. Leon relished the sight. There was nothing more beautiful to him then when a god trembled at his feet. Ichthys was a special case as he was also one of the twelve gods of the Zodiac. 

     “I’ll admit seeing you on your knees before me is pleasing.” He smiled darkly causing the young man to shrink away from him. The Minister took his time slowly circling the troublesome fish simply observing him joyously as the fear continued to grow. 

     “L-Leon, seriously, I’m like reallllllly sorry. I totally promise not to prank anyone anymore so please just let me go...”

     “Pffft. An empty promise from the likes of you.”

     “Pleeeeease Leon, I beg you to just let me go. Please?” As Leon looked down at the young man he was caught off guard by the unexpected sight. There was something strangely arousing seeing this beautiful and sexually innocent young god begging him on his knees. He tried to ignore it but it was too late. This was how it always went. Once Leon saw something new he wanted he took it, no questions asked consequences be damned. Besides, no one was brave or strong enough to go against him. 

     The soft grey eyes staring at him pleadingly looked so innocent and pure Leon couldn’t help himself. Standing directly in front of Ichthys the god of Leo pulled the problem child to his feet staring him straight in the eyes.

     “You’re really scared of me aren’t you?” He said rather sadistically enjoying the entire situation far more than he should. Grabbing Ichthys roughly by the chin he examined the young gods face carefully.

     “For a man you are awfully pretty.” Leon teased causing a fierce blush to spread across Ichthys’ face.

     “I think I just figured out exactly how you’re going to entertain me.” Without a chance to even respond Ichthys suddenly found himself at the mercy of the Minister of the Department of Wishes. 

     Leon aggressively claimed the young man’s lips eagerly practically stealing his breath away. Unsure of how to react to such an unexpected turn of events  Ichthys simply stood there dumbfounded but helpless to do anything. 

     “Obey me Ichthys. I promise things will go much more smoothly if you do.” He stared into Leon’s eyes unsure of what to say or do allowing Leon the opportunity to continue however he pleased. 

     “You’re quite young for a god especially to be in such a powerful and respected position. Always acting the part of a child. But I have to wonder Ichthys, just how innocent are you really? Because from here, I am pretty sure you have yet to experience any of the things I’m about to do to you.” Blinking in sheer disbelief at the Lion’s words he was fully unprepared for what happened next.

     “For example, have you ever felt something this exquisite?” Leon trailed his fingers along his victim’s cheek treating him to the intense pleasure he often offered multitudes of women. Unprepared for something so intense Ichthys moaned breathily practically collapsing against the bed. 

     “Feels pretty great right? How about a little more.” Leon softly pulled his fingertips from both hands across Ichthys’ scalp sending a near orgasmic wave through his body. 

     “Nmmmmm......o-oh god! L-Leon...it...it feels SO good.....” Leon couldn’t help but enjoy seeing the god of Pisces coming undone at his command. It was impossibly arousing awakening a growing need below. 

     “Do you want me to continue?” 

     “....Y-Yes....”

     “Then be a good little fish and beg.” The heavy lidded lust ridden god didn’t even hesitate which only served to make Leon’s stiffness more uncomfortable.

     “P-Please Leon, touch me.” Losing any remaining self control at the sexy plea The god of Leo once again claimed the young god’s mouth and this time Ichthys was more than willing to allow it. Snaking his tongue inside the whimpers and breathy moans spilling innocently from the problem child’s mouth were quickly pushing him to the edge. He was eager to watch the god of Pisces come undone so deliciously. 

     Spinning Ichthys around abruptly he pushed him face first over the side of the bed before snapping their clothes away. The freedom from the restraint of his cloth barrier was pleasing. Grabbing his hardness he slowly stroked it as the other hand glided down the small of Ichthys’ back sending waves of pleasure through him. It was just enough to drive the young god crazy but not enough to let him cum. Leon wanted to be buried deep inside him when he finally allowed Ichthys to release.

     “Deep breath beautiful, this will only hurt for a moment.” The sexy cry that followed echoed through the room. Once Leon was all the way in he leaned over the grey eyed man and whispered in his ear.

     “Don’t you dare cum until I say so.” Then he began slowly thrusting in and out gently at first till Ichthys could get used to the sensation. His hands clawed and tightly squeezed the sheets as Leon set the pace.

     “You’re doing fine, just relax.” After a few moments Leon finally gripped the other man’s hardness and began to stroke him causing the most divine sounds to spill from his lips.

     “G-God....f-f-fuck! Nmmph! Unnnnh.....harder....oh god!”

     “Tell me how much you want it.”

     “Mmm....Ohhhh.....f-fuck me Leon!....Fuck meeeee!” The sound of their love making echoed off the walls as the pair neared climax. Leon grabbed a handful of Ichthys hair turning his head to kiss him deeply. Feeling him harden further and begin to twitch Leon quickly joined him. 

     “Alright fish, I give you permission to let go.” As he says this he sends a huge wave of pleasure on top of everything else.

     “L-LEON! OHHHH.....OHHHH FUUUUUUUCK!!!!! Unnnh! Nmmmm.....Mnnnn......haaaaaaah.....” At the same time Ichthys releases Leon fills him with round after round of his warmth finally quelling the hunger. 

     Panting wildly and damp with sweat Ichthys’ legs finally give out as he collapses atop the bed. His muscles are still trembling all over from the intense impact the orgasm had made. The god of Leo smirked at the newly defiled mess curled into a ball on his mattress. Finally removing the harness Ichthys was free to go but he was unable to do much of anything in his current state. Leon was surprised to find that as he observed the problem child he actually felt a little bad for the kid. Uncharacteristically, he gently brushed the sweaty strands from his forehead touching him tenderly. 

     “I take it you learned your lesson?” Leon teased causing a faint smile to tug at Ichthys’ lips. It wasn’t till a few moments later that he finally replied without ever opening his eyes.

     “I don’t know about that buuuuut.....I definitely learned that I want to be in the Department of Wishes.” 

     “Pffft. Typical fish.” Leon snorted watching as the young god fell asleep curled up against him on his bed.

My debut fanfic available only here! Hope you enjoyed it. :)

#star crossed myth #leon #ichthys #scm leon #scm #scm ichthys #scm fanfic #scorpio #dui #scm smut

[eldritchsurveys]

938.

5k Survey XLVII

2401. Does love come from the brain, the heart or elsewhere? >> Listen, all “love” is to me is a set of behaviours. I don’t know where the impetus to do those behaviours comes from, I don’t know what kind of emotional resonance those behaviours are supposed to have, and I’m consistently annoyed at being asked about this esoteric concept that I’m perfectly content to leave to the poets. 2402. Have you ever given a shot? If not, do you think you could give one to a loved one if you HAD to? Do you think you could give one to yourself? >> I’ve done it (on myself and on another person -- the same kind of shot, incidentally: testosterone) and I’d do it again. It’s not that difficult. The difficult ones they save for the professionals, obviously. 2403. Can you lick your elbow? Come on, didja try? >> No. And no, I did not try, because I already know the answer. 2404. If i was going to be talking to you for 10 minutes, what would be something really interesting you know a little bit about but would like to know more? >> Anything relating to mythology. 2405. If today was a holiday, what would it be? >> ---

2406. If you were making a mix tape what would you HAVE to have one it? >> --- 2407. What do you think of the Sopranos? >> I don’t think of it, I’ve never seen it. 2408. Can you name three good things about the society you live in? How about three bad things? >> Probably, but I don’t feel like thinking about it right now. 2409. Have you ever had a crush on your teacher? How about your boss? >> I don’t know if I’d call it a crush, in hindsight. I mean, maybe it was. But mostly I was just glomming onto a pretty-ish man who paid me positive attention, as an emotionally-neglected, traumatised teenager will. 2410. What is the difference between acting like someone in high school and acting like an adult? >> I assume emotional maturity is one of the major differences. 2411. What is the difference between a whopper and a whopper jr? >> The Whopper is larger, I’d assume. 2413. Do you like: Moby? Run DMC? the Cure? Yes. Shakira?  Blink182? A couple of songs. the Pet Shop Boys? Weezer? Eh, occasionally. Red Hot Chilli Peppers? Yes. Nick cave? YES. The Pixies? Well, I do like that one song. You know the one. KRS-One? The Juice Crew? 2414. Have you ever seen a movie in 3D? >> I’ve seen several movies in 3D. For some reason, the glasses that seem to bother almost everyone I know don’t bother me... which is ironic because I’m the one who’s sensitive to everything sensory-wise. :V 2415. How difficult do you think it is for immigrants to come into your country? How difficult is it for them to become citizens? >> I assume it’s more difficult to immigrate here now than it was when I was a kid. I think it’s been difficult to obtain citizenship for a while, though. 2416. Do you have what it takes to go live in another country, maybe for years, where you don’t speak the language as your first language? >> I don’t know. What does it take? 2418. have you ever died in your dreams? >> Once. 2419. Do you like Douglas Adams? Eh. Kurt Vonnegut?  Tom Robbins? Philip K Dick? Orson Scott Card? It’s been so long since I read that one book that I don’t know how I feel about this author anymore. 2420. What clothing size are you? What size do you wish you were? Did you know that Marilyn Monroe was a size 12(and lots of people think she’s HOT)? >> That obviously depends on the kind of clothing (and the brand, the country of origin, the gender it’s catering to...). As far as Marilyn Monroe is concerned, I don’t care. 2421. Does science leave room for faith? Does faith leave room for science? >> Those concepts are indifferent towards each other. The people who stand for one of those concepts may vary widely in their acceptance of the other. 2422. What book should our political leaders read and why? >> --- 2423. Why and under what circumstances are people more likely to buy brand names rather then their generic counterparts? >> Like, I understand it’s hard to think of 5000 questions and all, but I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with all these Google-type questions. 2424. What is your favorite glass object? >> I don’t have a favourite glass object. ...My computers have glass in them? 2425. Do you like to window shop? >> I don’t. 2426. Have you ever loved someone so much it just turned to hate? >> That sounds like an interesting situation to be in. I’d like to pick the brain of anyone who answers “yes” to this. 2427. What is arrogance? >> Can I introduce you to a guy named Webster... 2428. Are you more liberal or conservative? >> Liberal, if I must declare. 2429. When there is a presidential election in the USA why do we never hear anything about the third party candidates? Do you even know who they were last time? >> Because the bipartisan system is what pays the bills, or whatever. No, I don’t generally look into the third-party candidates, because these days, what’s the point? 2430. Are you more likely to buy one really nice expensive outfit or a couple of cheap outfits? >> I mean, I buy what I can afford... which is usually not the former. 2431. If you could, would you wear everything once, throw it out and buy something new? >> I really the fuck wouldn’t. I hate that that’s a thing at all. 2432. Do you believe that people have a responsibility to be: good to other people? good at their job? helpful to the earth(not litter, recycle)? aware consumers(not buy animal tested products, not buy products that were made in sweatshops, etc)? non-wasteful (not spend their money frivolously when they could save it to help others)? charitable (donating money, volunteering)? Which of the above are you? >> So, I don’t know anything about social responsibility. I don’t consider myself qualified to dictate what other people should be doing with their life, energy, money, time, whatever. I can barely figure out what I ought to do with my own. As far as what responsibilities from the above I’ve undertaken... yeah, I don’t know. I do my best to not be a dick to other people and I do my best to be aware of what I consume and how much. But let’s be real, most of my time, energy, and whatever disposable money I have goes to managing myself on a daily basis, which is a full time job. 2433. How do you feel about the internet? Should there be laws and censorship on the internet? >> I love the internet. I think there should be laws restraining corporate interests, and certainly the things that are illegal in meatspace should remain illegal in cyberspace. I don’t think the government should be censoring the average user’s content, though. That doesn’t seem constitutional. 2434. Can you think of any questions that aren’t already on this survey? >> I could if I tried. Am I going to try? No. 2435. Does sleep seem like a little death to you? >> Yeah, sometimes. If I’m in a particularly anxious vibe, I can end up fixating on the deathlike feeling of falling asleep, which obviously prevents me from falling asleep. It’s annoying. 2436. Have you ever seen(and if yes, what did you think of): Joy Ride? Ghost World? Monsters Inc?  Queen of the Damned? Yes, quite a few times. I enjoy parts of it, mainly out of it just being a regular fixture in my life for a few years in my twenties. Office Space? Yeah, and I thought it was pretty great. 2437. At what age did you find out that Santa Claus wasn’t real? >> I was never taught about him in the first place. 2438. How many pairs of shoes do have in your closet? Do you like to wear the same shoes everyday or do you like a variety?: >> I have two pairs of shoes, not counting weather boots. So yes, I’m usually wearing the same shoes every day (the sneakers most often in the summer, the boots more often the rest of the year). 2439. How many lovers have you had? >> Hm. 2440. Have you ever had surgery? For what? >> No. 2441. What puts you in the mood for sex? >> Some stuff Inworlders do. But most of the time, it’s just a random urge. It can happen multiple times in a week or not happen for weeks and then randomly happen. 2442. Have you ever been on alcohol or drugs while at school or work? >> --- 2443. What do you think of Martha Stewart? >> I don’t think of Martha Stewart. 2445. What do you think of: British people? This is stereotype bait. Australians? Americans? Canadians? Mexicans? French people? Germans?  2446. What do you do to cure the hiccups? >> I don’t ever have hiccups for longer than, like, a couple of minutes, so. 2447. What is the FIRST thing you do when you come home from school or work? >> --- 2448. Are you a slob? >> No. 2449. Do you have a good work ethic? >> I don’t know, I’ve never been in a situation where work felt fulfilling and I felt like I was of some real use to the world. I’d imagine that could have an effect on one’s “work ethic”, but hey, what do I know. 2450. Are you a pack-rat? >> Rather the opposite, I’d say.

#surveys #survey #5000 question survey

[deargoditsgrace]

Quarantine Update / Life

It’s been God knows how many weeks now of quarantine and seems like everyone’s getting used to what life is now. I know there are some people with heightened anxiety and depression, but for me, I’m really starting to enjoy this time of some solitude. What makes me more anxious is the thought of being obligated to see people. Not because I’m afraid of their germs, but because I’m okay with seeing the people I want to see. 

Quarantine has taught me many things about myself:

1. I lack so much discipline. Most people wouldn’t say I’m lazy, but I do things because my emotions are dragging me to do it. Whether that is working or exercising, I haven’t taught my brain to do them because I need to rather I do them because I feel obligated. I truly enjoy working out - the feeling of accomplishment, the knowing that my body is getting stronger is enticing, but to get myself to go is another thing. I’m no slob, and i would not call myself lazy, but I really want to train my mind and my body that there are some things that just need to be done. 

2. In my best state, I’m constantly trying to better myself. When I have time to think and reflect is probably the most productive time I can give. In the past couple of weeks (maybe less - i just can’t see my world without it rn), I’ve learned to care for my body and what goes into it, the things I see and do, and how I can impact my environment. Some of these changes are to eat better quality foods and to be more in tune with what I am consuming. We are so out of tune with where our diet comes from - the chickens, meat, vegetables - that we just consume without acknowledgment of sacrifice or life. I’m no PETA advocate, but I do want to know that where I buy my food, the ingredients are being celebrated for its life and the nourishment it brings our bodies. For example - instead of buying all of our ingredients from the supermarket - buy more local, organic ingredients and support local businesses and farms while doing so. Though the idea is to eat local and seasonally, we have been trained since our youth to be able to have anything we desire because it will be shipped right to us. Buying local organic meat has been a lot harder because of the cost and because of the ease grocery stores in, but i do hope in the future, we can consume locally raised and slaughtered meat. 

Some of the ways I want to help the environment is to consume less. In the world where cheaper the better, and quantity over quality - we are not used to paying steep prices for basic tees or clothing. The fashion industry especially fast fashion has polluted the world and created more waste than ever before. Its weird to hear things like, “all the plastic you’ve ever consumed ie. toys, toothbrushes, hangers they all still exist on the planet”. Multiply that by the number of people on the earth and BOOM, that’s a load of garbage. No wonder why our earth is freaking out and climate change is real. God tells us to be stewards of not just our bodies, but our finances and even this earth. If we don’t make at least a conscious effort to do our part, then what will be of this earth for our kids in 20 years. I think it’s the small ways you can help that make a difference. Use less, consume less. Don’t buy clothes you dont need, use reuseable bags when shopping for groceries, bring your own cup to starbucks - those things. Personally - I’m aiming to buy more local - ie farmers markets so that we spend less on the transportation of goods, only buying clothes and goods when I need it not just when I want it so when things run out, not because I don’t like it - and hopefully start bulk shopping at the local bulk no package store. 

Some things that I acknowledge when I say these things is my privilege. To have a job where I can afford to live on my own and buy my own groceries but also to choose where I’d like to shop even if that comes at a premium. I know that even when I was a kid, my parents did not think or even consider living this lifestyle because it was unaffordable. They bought me food to nourish my body. I always ate a lot of fruits and vegetables but it didn’t matter whether they were locally sourced or organic. I don’t think the organic label is super important, but I’d like to eat that way if possible and if my means can afford it. I believe that health is wealth and if i look closely at my spending habits, if i stop buying useless, unnecessary goods I can live this way but it is also still expensive. Choosing to shop on a website that is sustainable with no harmful chemicals or items that are ethically made instead of at a sweatshop is something that I want to pursue in the future if not now. But seriously, to do that is extremely expensive so hopefully I can fully live this out even after quarantine. 

3. I like to project my ideas onto others and that needs to stop. All of this self reflection started with my friend Anna who like me wants to be a steward of her environment. Honestly without her, I don’t know if i would be making these conscious efforts but talking through all the things we “wanted” to do, it made sense to actually start doing them. When my other roommate came back from her trip home, she was in some ways shellshocked by all the decisions we made: to not grocery shop for 2 weeks, and to only pick up fresh produce and meat from the farmers market weekly. She caved in less than one day after coming back after saying that she would try it with us. It frustrated me beyond no end because she didn’t try. But it’s not her fault. She didn’t try to do this, she didn’t want this lifestyle and she didn’t see a need to change from the status quo. And honestly that’s fine. And it should be fine. Projecting my lifestyle or lifestyle change is something I hate when people do to me and it seems so two faced when I do it to someone else. But i will admit its hard to even stop those thoughts from forming. Even when we went to the grocery store she was asking what snacks we wanted. I immediately said I didn’t want any because in my mind, they’re filled with other ingredients that I didn’t need. And snacks are a nice to have but when you eat whole foods, I end up not craving them. Occasionally I will, but if i don’t have them i can’t eat them. But immediately i got annoyed like.. this girl eating hot pockets and pizza rolls sigh. Snacks are not inherently bad and I didn’t need to get annoyed but I did. I think i need to approach her lifestyle like Andrew’s. Telling them what I’m doing, but not forcing them to do it with me. It’s a bit easier with Andrew because we don’t live together but imagine if I did. How can I construct the conversation to help them see why I’m doing it, and letting them choose on their own whether they want to also try to do it. 

4. I hate followers. I like doers. If I’m doing something, don’t follow me just because I’m doing it. Make a conscious decision as to the why and then make your own decision. Also if you’re going to say you’re going to do something, then goddamn do it. Don’t make me listen to your desires when in your power you can do all of these things. Just do it. 

5. I should really live by my own mottos.

6. Everyone is a work in progress. Enjoy the ride. 

[techstaffer]

#HRQ&A - I got a Creepy Job Interview Invitation,  and more

#HRQ&A - I got a Creepy Job Interview Invitation,  and more -  #HR   #Business http://dld.bz/hjCR6

A creepy interview invitation, employer wants my resume in a spreadsheet, and more

by ALISON GREEN on DECEMBER 21, 2018

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. This interview invitation feels creepy

I’m a young-ish woman. There’s a guy (slightly older than me) who works in the same building I do, but for a different employer. He seems like a nice guy and we get along fine, but he’s been showing a strong personal interest in me for several months now. The thing is, I can’t tell if he’s just being friendly or if he’s flirting with me. I’m single, but he’s married, so I’m mildly uncomfortable, but I’ve been trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

Since last summer, he’s been strongly hinting that he might want to hire me, if he gets approval to hire a new staff member. Well, he recently got approval, I applied, and now he’s offered me an interview. What’s weird, though, is that this job involves a lot of duties that I have almost no experience with. I’m confident that I could learn how to perform those duties, but I really don’t have the experience, so it seems odd that he’s so interested in me as a candidate. But I was still trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

But then, when I politely requested an evening interview so I wouldn’t have to miss work, he said that he’d take me out to dinner (just the two of us) and we would do the interview then. I know high-ranking positions will sometimes involve dinner interviews with company executives, but this is just an admin role.

So, now I’m really starting to wonder. Is he really just being friendly? In which case, maybe he’s interested in hiring me (even though I lack experience) because he likes my personality, work ethic, soft skills, etc.? Or is he a creep who’s flirting with me and wanting to cheat on his wife?

The job would pay a lot more than I’m making now (and I really need the money) and I don’t want to turn down the job if he really is just being friendly, but I also don’t want to accept the job and then get into a bad situation. Also, if I get into a bad situation, then I won’t financially be able to afford to quit. I really don’t know what to do with this. I’m really stressing out about this interview.

I’m sorry to say it, but it sounds like there’s a pretty good chance that this interview or “interview” isn’t motivated entirely by your professional skills. How much did this guy really know about your experience and skills before telling you he’d like to hire you? If you just work in the same building and have seen each other in passing, I’m guessing he didn’t know a ton about your actual work when he said that, which doesn’t bode well.

And the dinner interview … yes, dinner invitations happen, and you did ask for a meeting in the evening, but I would trust your gut. You’ve been uncomfortable all along, and now he wants to take you to dinner to talk about a job that you don’t think you’re a logical match for.

If you want to at least talk to him and learn more, then in response to the dinner invitation, you can try saying, “I’d prefer to interview in your office so we can focus on the job” and see how that goes over. And you can ask a lot in the interview about the needs of the role and how he sees your background fitting in with that. You can say things like, “I’m curious what made you think of me for this role. It seems like you’re looking for X and Y, which isn’t my background.”

But trust your gut.

2. Employer wants my resume in spreadsheet format

I’m job hunting and have gone back and forth with an employer via email a bit. Everything seemed pretty normal and typical with our correspondence but then today I got a request as follows: “Thank you for following up on your application. Would you please be able to transfer your resume into a Google spreadsheet and share it with me? The spreadsheet should include everything that’s in your current Word version such as positions you have held with titles, descriptions, dates, etc.”

I have been in the workforce for over 20 years and this is a first. A resume in SPREADSHEET format? I almost would have thought this was an error and she just wanted it from Word into Google Docs, but no, she is very clear she wants a spreadsheet format.

This is a high-level admin position, with (I’m assuming) a lot of applicants. Is this a test? I’m thinking that this is a test for them to see if I’m able to transfer the information in a way that is logical. I seriously can’t think of any other reason why a resume would be asked for in a spreadsheet. Mind you, it would be one thing if it were just a list of prior jobs and their dates, but she wants all the information, so it’s going to look weird.

Yes, that’s extremely odd. It’s possible that it’s a test (but if so, it’s a terrible one because without any explanation it’s going to turn off good candidates, as it has you), but it’s also possible that it’s just plain old incompetence on their part (which explains quite a bit of hiring-process strangeness).

It’s okay to ask for clarification. You could say, “To make sure I understand, is this an exercise to assess my use of Excel? If so, I can certainly do that — just want to make sure I understand the context.”

3. My coworkers say I’m too loud when I talk on the phone

I got feedback yesterday that I am bothering some of my colleagues (open floor plan, nobody has offices) because I talk loudly on the phone (which is like half of my job). And, it’s true! I do! I am excited and passionate and that manifests in volume and gesticulation that I don’t really notice I’m doing.

I feel embarrassed and deflated, but also like screw you, man. Sorry I care about my work. Put on headphones! But, mostly, I feel embarrassed and not sure what to do. Do I book a conference room for all calls I have to take, annoying and time consuming as that would be? Do I try a new headset that’s only on one ear so maybe being able to hear myself will help me be more quiet? Keep doing my thing and let people figure out their own solution if it bothers them? Ugh.

Not the latter. If your volume is bothering people, then you do have an obligation to try to control it. You’re in an open office, and having to modulate your voice is part of the deal. It’s not reasonable to expect people to wear headphones all day long instead of you trying to modulate your voice, difficult as it might be. (And I do know that it might be difficult, if you’re just naturally a louder person.) This is reason #591 why open offices suck.

Try your headset-in-one-ear-only idea and see if it helps. Try taking some calls in conferences rooms — not all of them necessarily, but doing that with even a portion of your calls will probably help things, especially calls that you know are likely to be long. And try just being more aware that there are people around you whose concentration is broken when you’re loud, and it sucks for all of you. Maybe some of this will help, maybe it won’t — but if people see you making an effort, that itself will likely be appreciated.

(And why oh why do offices put people whose jobs are 50% phone work in open floor plans around people whose jobs aren’t? It’s ridiculous.)

4. Interviewing a candidate for the same job I’m applying for

My manager asked me last month to apply for a position (essentially a career promotion) that I would be “a perfect fit” and “exceeded expectations” for. I apply and wait, coming to find out two other coworkers (within the same team) were also told that they should apply for the same position with similar encouragements as internal candidates. I accept that the position is competitive and try to keep a level head given the difficult social situation. Now, my manager invites an external candidate to interview, only inviting myself and the two other internal candidates to this private meeting. I am feeling a major conflict of interest and I am now incredibly uncomfortable at this point. How do I confront this situation as a professional?

Yeah, that’s a conflict of interest and your manager shouldn’t have put you in that position. It’s particularly odd that she’s pulling in the two other internal candidates too.

But since she has, you’ll actually help your own candidacy if you’re scrupulously objective about this candidate, because it’ll show professional maturity and an ability to put the needs of the organization first. To the best you can, go into the interview pretending that you’re not interested in the job yourself, be warm and friendly to the candidate, and try to generally assess her fit for the job and with your team. If you end up thinking she’s not especially well matched with it, that’s actually a trickier situation than if she is, because you’ll need to share your reservations without sounding like you’re biased. In that case, I’d recommend leading with, “I realize I may have bias because I’m interested in the role myself, but my biggest priority is getting the right person in the role, and while I do think Jane brings some strengths, I’m concerned about ____. That would be my feedback regardless of my own candidacy, although it’s awkward to give it as a candidate myself.”

But it’s super weird that your manager is doing this, and it would also be fine to say to her advance, “I’m wondering about having me and other internal candidates present in an interview of another candidate, and worry it could look like a conflict of interest, especially if the external candidate later learns someone in their interview was hired. Would it make sense for us to sit this out?”

5. Can I ask to be paid monthly instead of semi-monthly?

I’ve worked overseas, where once-a-month paychecks are the norm. I just accepted an offer in NYC and notice the pay will be semi-monthly. Is it poor etiquette to ask for a monthly direct deposit (for ease with bill paying and because otherwise I worry that I’ll be tempted to spend my money impulsively since I know I have another paycheck coming)? Is it even possible?

Nope, you can’t do that. New York, like many states, requires that employers pay semi-monthly. But even if that weren’t the case, you’d be asking them to do the work of a separate payroll run just for you, which isn’t practical.

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#att verizon

[mrsteveecook]

a creepy interview invitation, employer wants my resume in a spreadsheet, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. This interview invitation feels creepy

I’m a young-ish woman. There’s a guy (slightly older than me) who works in the same building I do, but for a different employer. He seems like a nice guy and we get along fine, but he’s been showing a strong personal interest in me for several months now. The thing is, I can’t tell if he’s just being friendly or if he’s flirting with me. I’m single, but he’s married, so I’m mildly uncomfortable, but I’ve been trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

Since last summer, he’s been strongly hinting that he might want to hire me, if he gets approval to hire a new staff member. Well, he recently got approval, I applied, and now he’s offered me an interview. What’s weird, though, is that this job involves a lot of duties that I have almost no experience with. I’m confident that I could learn how to perform those duties, but I really don’t have the experience, so it seems odd that he’s so interested in me as a candidate. But I was still trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

But then, when I politely requested an evening interview so I wouldn’t have to miss work, he said that he’d take me out to dinner (just the two of us) and we would do the interview then. I know high-ranking positions will sometimes involve dinner interviews with company executives, but this is just an admin role.

So, now I’m really starting to wonder. Is he really just being friendly? In which case, maybe he’s interested in hiring me (even though I lack experience) because he likes my personality, work ethic, soft skills, etc.? Or is he a creep who’s flirting with me and wanting to cheat on his wife?

The job would pay a lot more than I’m making now (and I really need the money) and I don’t want to turn down the job if he really is just being friendly, but I also don’t want to accept the job and then get into a bad situation. Also, if I get into a bad situation, then I won’t financially be able to afford to quit. I really don’t know what to do with this. I’m really stressing out about this interview.

I’m sorry to say it, but it sounds like there’s a pretty good chance that this interview or “interview” isn’t motivated entirely by your professional skills How much did this guy really know about your experience and skills before telling you he’d like to hire you? If you just work in the same building and have seen each other in passing, I’m guessing he didn’t know a ton about your actual work when he said that, which doesn’t bode well.

And the dinner interview … yes, dinner invitations happen, and you did ask for a meeting in the evening, but I would trust your gut.

You’ve been uncomfortable all along, and now he wants to take you to dinner to talk about a job that you don’t think you’re a logical match for.

If you want to at least talk to him and learn more, then in response to the dinner invitation, you can try saying, “I’d prefer to interview in your office so we can focus on the job” and see how that goes over. And you can ask a lot in the interview about the needs of the role and how he sees your background fitting in with that. You can say things like, “I’m curious what made you think of me for this role. It seems like you’re looking for X and Y, which isn’t my background.”

But trust your gut.

2. Employer wants my resume in spreadsheet format

I’m job hunting and have gone back and forth with an employer via email a bit. Everything seemed pretty normal and typical with our correspondence but then today I got a request as follows: “Thank you for following up on your application. Would you please be able to transfer your resume into a Google spreadsheet and share it with me? The spreadsheet should include everything that’s in your current Word version such as positions you have held with titles, descriptions, dates, etc.”

I have been in the workforce for over 20 years and this is a first. A resume in SPREADSHEET format? I almost would have thought this was an error and she just wanted it from Word into Google Docs, but no, she is very clear she wants a spreadsheet format.

This is a high-level admin position, with (I’m assuming) a lot of applicants. Is this a test? I’m thinking that this is a test for them to see if I’m able to transfer the information in a way that is logical. I seriously can’t think of any other reason why a resume would be asked for in a spreadsheet. Mind you, it would be one thing if it were just a list of prior jobs and their dates, but she wants all the information, so it’s going to look weird.

Yes, that’s extremely odd. It’s possible that it’s a test (but if so, it’s a terrible one because without any explanation it’s going to turn off good candidates, as it has you), but it’s also possible that it’s just plain old incompetence on their part (which explains quite a bit of hiring-process strangeness).

It’s okay to ask for clarification. You could say, “To make sure I understand, is this an exercise to assess my use of Excel? If so, I can certainly do that — just want to make sure I understand the context.”

3. My coworkers say I’m too loud when I talk on the phone

I got feedback yesterday that I am bothering some of my colleagues (open floor plan, nobody has offices) because I talk loudly on the phone (which is like half of my job). And, it’s true! I do! I am excited and passionate and that manifests in volume and gesticulation that I don’t really notice I’m doing.

I feel embarrassed and deflated, but also like screw you, man. Sorry I care about my work. Put on headphones! But, mostly, I feel embarrassed and not sure what to do. Do I book a conference room for all calls I have to take, annoying and time consuming as that would be? Do I try a new headset that’s only on one ear so maybe being able to hear myself will help me be more quiet? Keep doing my thing and let people figure out their own solution if it bothers them? Ugh.

Not the latter. If your volume is bothering people, then you do have an obligation to try to control it. You’re in an open office, and having to modulate your voice is part of the deal. It’s not reasonable to expect people to wear headphones all day long instead of you trying to modulate your voice, difficult as it might be. (And I do know that it might be difficult, if you’re just naturally a louder person.) This is reason #591 why open offices suck.

Try your headset-in-one-ear-only idea and see if it helps. Try taking some calls in conferences rooms — not all of them necessarily, but doing that with even a portion of your calls will probably help things, especially calls that you know are likely to be long. And try just being more aware that there are people around you whose concentration is broken when you’re loud, and it sucks for all of you. Maybe some of this will help, maybe it won’t — but if people see you making an effort, that itself will likely be appreciated.

(And why oh why do offices put people whose jobs are 50% phone work in open floor plans around people whose jobs aren’t? It’s ridiculous.)

4. Interviewing a candidate for the same job I’m applying for

My manager asked me last month to apply for a position (essentially a career promotion) that I would be “a perfect fit” and “exceeded expectations” for. I apply and wait, coming to find out two other coworkers (within the same team) were also told that they should apply for the same position with similar encouragements as internal candidates. I accept that the position is competitive and try to keep a level head given the difficult social situation. Now, my manager invites an external candidate to interview, only inviting myself and the two other internal candidates to this private meeting. I am feeling a major conflict of interest and I am now incredibly uncomfortable at this point. How do I confront this situation as a professional?

Yeah, that’s a conflict of interest and your manager shouldn’t have put you in that position. It’s particularly odd that she’s pulling in the two other internal candidates too.

But since she has, you’ll actually help your own candidacy if you’re scrupulously objective about this candidate, because it’ll show professional maturity and an ability to put the needs of the organization first. To the best you can, go into the interview pretending that you’re not interested in the job yourself, be warm and friendly to the candidate, and try to generally assess her fit for the job and with your team. If you end up thinking she’s not especially well matched with it, that’s actually a trickier situation than if she is, because you’ll need to share your reservations without sounding like you’re biased. In that case, I’d recommend leading with, “I realize I may have bias because I’m interested in the role myself, but my biggest priority is getting the right person in the role, and while I do think Jane brings some strengths, I’m concerned about ____. That would be my feedback regardless of my own candidacy, although it’s awkward to give it as a candidate myself.”

But it’s super weird that your manager is doing this, and it would also be fine to say to her advance, “I’m wondering about having me and other internal candidates present in an interview of another candidate, and worry it could look like a conflict of interest, especially if the external candidate later learns someone in their interview was hired. Would it make sense for us to sit this out?”

5. Can I ask to be paid monthly instead of semi-monthly?

I’ve worked overseas, where once-a-month paychecks are the norm. I just accepted an offer in NYC and notice the pay will be semi-monthly. Is it poor etiquette to ask for a monthly direct deposit (for ease with bill paying and because otherwise I worry that I’ll be tempted to spend my money impulsively since I know I have another paycheck coming)? Is it even possible?

Nope, you can’t do that. New York, like many states, requires that employers pay semi-monthly. But even if that weren’t the case, you’d be asking them to do the work of a separate payroll run just for you, which isn’t practical.

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a creepy interview invitation, employer wants my resume in a spreadsheet, and more was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

from Ask a Manager http://bit.ly/2QN4OfD

[ryjelsum]

Chimera

In a nondescript Chicago condo, a young man’s speech and typing filled a tiny home office. There was only one man in the room, but whenever he was impassioned about something, he always felt it necessary to speak it out, even if no one was around to hear him. He was finishing the letter that he was writing to his current employer, a private genetic engineering firm in Chicago who called themselves Chimera INC. This firm offered to splice people’s genetics with animal genetics, for those who desired to look more like an animal. However, this man had been keeping track of the first few clients who had received this treatment, and found as their physical animal characteristics developed, so did mental ones. These were mostly violent crimes, as those who were wealthy enough to afford the procedure usually preferred a more predatory look, and thus developed predatory instincts. However, those who had their genetics spliced with prey animals were also documented to develop anxiety disorders. With this evidence in hand, the man could see no other ethical thing to do other than to write a letter to his employer and figure out to what degree, if any, they were aware of these unintended effects.

“These effects are not only dangerous, the fact that the consumers involved were not made aware of them is wildly illegal. The fact that these side effects were not caught in testing presents a number of ethical issues that the public should be informed about before they decide to have the procedures offered by our company, especially because they are completely elective. If the company refuses to rectify these shortfallings, you should decide in short order and consider this as my two weeks’ notice. Morgan Bright.”

Morgan brushed his hands against each other and slumped in his chair, almost unconsciously emitting a sigh. Then, he heard his office’s door click. His girlfriend must have came home while he was typing.

“Hello, honey! Are you chewing your workplace out?” she said, and then laughed brightly.

Morgan sat up, very slowly and carefully, and pushed his rolling office chair aside. “Yeah, babe. I was just finishing up my letter notifying them that I am… well aware of the risks that they’re omitting. I really don’t want to take the position of having to be a whistleblower here, because any controversy could slow the progress of this whole field, since people would start to not trust genetic modification firms. I really don’t want that to happen, because…” Morgan trailed off, but his girlfriend picked up where his sentence left off.

“..your hemophilia, right?”

“Yeah.” Morgan sat back down in his office chair, hard, winced and quickly checked himself for wounds, then sighed and put his head in his hands. “I don’t want to live with it my whole life. I don’t get to experience the outdoors, hell, I can’t even fathom living somewhere rurally just in case I need to go to the ER because of an injury.”

Morgan’s girlfriend kneeled beside the chair and held one of Morgan’s hands. “I know how hard it is for you. And I definitely agree with you, I want this field to advance quickly for your sake.”

Both were silent for a minute, then Morgan spoke. “I’m going to finish this e-mail. Could you get dinner ready for me?”

“Sure, babe!” Morgan’s girlfriend responded almost immediately. Morgan smiled. He could always depend on her for help and support.

- - -

In a high-reaching Chicago skyscraper, the booming voice of something not quite human filled a large meeting room full of nervous executives.

“‘If the company refuses to rectify these shortfallings, you should decide in short order and consider this as my two weeks’ notice. Morgan Bright.’ WHO. IS. MORGAN. BRIGHT! Where in this company does he work?” The booming voice in question was from the head of the room, where a humanoid chimera sat in a high backed chair, reading an e-mail from a tablet computer. It had barely finished speaking when one of the many figures in the room spoke.

“H-he works in my department in R&D, Mr. Baron. One of our genetic experts.”

“Great. He’s fired. Put all of his stuff in a box and don’t even let him step in the research wing when he comes back on Monday.” Baron snapped back.

The department manager paused briefly, then spoke up a little. “He’s one of our brightest minds, sir, and he has a vested interest in--” Baron cut him off by stabbing its scorpion tail mere inches from the manager’s hand. He yelped, then withdrew his hand, shaking. Baron stood up and strode over to the department manager’s seat.

“Listen. This kid is young, right?” The manager nodded, still scared speechless. “He thinks that he can bully us into doing what he thinks is right. Let’s send him a message.” Baron’s pawed hand suddenly sprouted claws, which it raked across the department manager’s neck slowly. As the claws dragged in his skin, Baron hissed in his ear. “Never speak out of turn again. I can replace people like you in an instant, and there are much better ways your body could be used.”

As blood ran down the manager’s neck, Baron sheathed its claws, wiped its hands with a handkerchief, and walked towards the door of the meeting room as if nothing had happened. The entire room was in shock. The manager was in shock quite literally; he passed out as Baron strolled past him. It stopped as it reached the door. “Lay off a couple of others so that it doesn’t look like a retaliatory firing. I have a list in my office.” It then glanced at Morgan’s former manager as one would stare at a particularly annoying puppy. “Keep him alive, too. I think I’m going to need him later.”

- - -

When Morgan went to enter the research wing, he always scanned his card, which would automatically open the door for him. Today, however, when he tried to scan his card and walk in, he ran headlong into the door. After briefly making sure he hadn’t been cut anywhere, he looked around and tried to scan his card, yet again. The door still didn’t open, but this time his manager had noticed him, and opened the doors for him so they could speak.

“Hey Morgan! Did you not check your e-mail before coming here? You’re let go, effective today. Layoffs, sorry. Here’s the box of stuff that I pulled from your desk. Can’t let you back here to collect it yourself, you know. Security clearance and all that.”

Morgan knew that there was something wrong with this. “Aren’t you supposed to give notice before layoffs?” As he said this, Morgan’s manager immediately started to get nervous.

“Ha, well, you know how these things are, maybe the notification hadn’t made its way through. You’ll have to work that out with management. Well, it’s too bad I have to get back to work, I would love to stay and chat, bye!” He shut the door in Morgan’s face and sprinted back to his usual place of work.

Morgan went home and immediately started to draft the letter he vowed to send if he was fired for trying to hold his now former employer accountable. He was up well into the night drafting it, seeing as he had nothing better to do for the next few days anyway. At 4am that night, he sent a copy of the letter, along with a photo of his badge for verification, to as many news publications as he could find e-mails for. Then, being exhausted from a night full of passionate letter writing, he went to bed.

He was awoken not four hours later by extremely loud, intermittent pounding on his door, as if someone were trying to break it down. Morgan jolted awake, feeling very annoyed. He went to the door, looked into the peephole, and discovered that someone -- no, something was trying to break down his door. It was difficult to tell the size due to the distortion of the peephole, but he could tell that it had large claws, and was wearing a lab coat. As soon as he saw this creature, he felt adrenaline surge through his body. He immediately made a plan in his mind - step one, barricade the door, step two, run, step three, call… the police? Animal control? He would decide once he actually got a phone.

Morgan sprang into action. He propped a chair against the front door to jam the door knob, tossed a couple of stools in front of that, and then ran to his landline. He picked it up, quickly jammed nine-one-one into it, and barricaded himself behind his office’s door as he heard the front door start to snap. Once the line finally connected, Morgan very nearly shouted into the handset: “There’s someone--something--some kind of beast breaking into my house, please send somebody, and quickly!” He gave his address and apartment number, then hung up so he could focus at the matter at hand.

The door broke and the monster forced its way inside, mangling the doorframe in the process. Morgan held his back to the door to his office and squeezed, praying that the monster’s claws didn’t pierce through the door and into his back before help arrived. After five tantalizing minutes, where Morgan couldn’t tell if the thumping he was feeling was his own heart or the monster’s claws against the door, Morgan heard a scuffle beginning outside. There were two men shouting -- “Get on the ground!” -- “It’s going to charge!”, then a large crash, the sound of some glassware breaking -- he’d have to be careful to clean that all up so he didn’t step on it -- then Morgan heard a large thud. The house went silent, and Morgan spent a minute catching his breath before opening the door very slowly. After opening the door, he saw a police officer and an animal control officer -- they weren’t sure which to send, Morgan assumed -- and the laid down body of the monster that had been trying to kill him. He got a good look at it, and noticed a nametag on the labcoat. The name was too mangled to read, but the rest was visible:

Genetics Department Head

Chimera INC.

(picture of baron courtesy of @pawheld)

#stories #baron