#i dont interact with discourse anymore so if you have something mean to say just know im probably not going to say anything back | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thewarnerbrothers · 1 year

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alright i gotta say something

you really cant do anything when you have a moderately popular blog huh

look. im a lurker at heart. i just happen to have one issue: not being able to shut up when im interested in something. thats the only reaaon this blog exists. i didnt come here to make friends, though i ended up doing that along the way

i dont want or need your pity. what i need is for people i dont know at all to stop putting me under a microscope

newsflash: i dont matter. follower count doesnt matter. at all. do you know what its like having thousands of eyes on you all the time? it sucks

i literally cant do anything

if i block literal strangers, they get mad and try to publicly shame me for it. if i try to settle disputes amicably in private, its seen as bad. if i attempt to be open and transparent with modding decisions, its bad. if i ask people to actually talk to me, they dont. instead they kick up a frenzy in private to coordinate a stupid mass hissy fit disproportionate to any perceived slight they may have endured. if i make friends, people take it personally. people see that as some sort of insult. i cannot be friends with everyone. i wont. this hurts strangers feelings, dspite me not existing for their pleasure.

some of you feel very entitled to my time. you dont own me. i dont owe you anything. ive tried to not lose the few molecules of my mind left on a regular basis because of some people who are no longer in this fandom, and some who still are. and man. i am just. tired. of everyone. all the time.

i think even more than the fact that this series was released (mainly) as a bingewatch fest, what killed this fandom was you

not necessarily you, whoever is reading this. i mean the fans. in general. some of you are so annoying, rude, inappropriate, and willfully lacking in social skills. youre over dramatic. youre moody. youre dramamongering. youre liars. youre bullies. youre self-ascribed victims. you dont care about other human beings.

youre repulsive, frankly

you are part of the reason people have been leaving the fandom in droves. the homophobia. the transphobia. the ship hate. the inability to treat other people with basic human decency. the manufactured scandals. shut up and grow up

you know why i barely interact with larger fandom anymore? ill tell you

waves of harassment to varying degrees ad nauseam

creeps who refuse to even try to keep their fetishes to themselves in private groups that include minors

abusers (most of whom are thankfully now gone)

people befriending me only to reveal that they dont actually like or care about me as a person

the most willfully socially inept people to ever exist

nosy jerks who literally cannot stand not sticking their nose in personal problems that have nothing to do with them

people treating me and my blog like im google adsense. im not a billboard guys

people deciding i am evil for no apparent reason? sdkjfalsdjfa

thinly veiled anythingphobia pretending to be socially just (hi homophobes who imply that being lgbt by nature is 'adult')

people who just make things up. all the time. just make up a lie, say it passionately enough. if you try to defend yourself, youre seen as guilty/suspicious. if you try to resolve things quietly with only those involved, you're seen as guilty/suspicious. cant win

wankers who need to learn why parasocial relationships arent actually meant to be embraced wholeheartedly

really lame one-off trolls tbh

the most fandom discourse-poisoned takes i have seen since su hatedom was at its peak

im just tired of being nice all the time? i think you guys just like taking advantage of people you imagine to be good targets

listen. i am allowed to do whatever i want, regardless of how you feel about it. the same thing goes for you. i tend to try to resolve things reasonably and rationally, but i wont pretend ive never gotten mad or overreacted or made a decision i regret. ive made that pretty known. i like to think i've grown, and ive gone out of my way to apologize to people.

however.

some of yall do not understand that just because your feelings got hurt, it doesnt mean you are deserve an apology or an explanation. sometimes it literally is just a you problem. a skill issue. you need to grow thicker skin. learn how to curate your online experience. get. over it.

lets talk about blocking, shall we?

blocking is great. i block people all the time. i block bots, i block tag spammers, i block people who make posts with rancid vibes, i block people who ive personally interacted with and no longer wish to, i block because i get tired of seeing someones posts, i block people who post things that trigger me, i block blogs with icons i dont like. there's usually no grand reason for it, aside from egregious cases where i've been harassed. its also usually not personal. i will block people who ive followed for years. i dont care. i dont know most of yall. i know i've been blocked by tons of people and that's okay! i would rather people who don't want to interact with me do that.

if you get blocked, thats it. dont attempt to contact me again unless i reach out. im not the only blog in this fandom. youll live without my posts. i am not the arbiter of all things animaney.

im just some guy

i know that the people who need to hear this most will not care nor will they actually absorb what i'm saying. ive gotten a lot of hate over the dumbest crap. im done. i think i need to stop trying to be so friendly, because some of you think being a little pissbaby is the only way to interact with others online.

cant wait til i finally explode one day and just delete everything

tldr shut up leave me alone oh my god its not that big a deal jesus christ

#if youre gonna treat me like shit regardless i get to be upset about it #bleh

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problematicfactive · 8 months

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How do you feel about fakers?

I'm assuming you mean problematic factive fakers specifically, I'm not touching on any other discourse

First off, I do believe that faking is real. I know there are people out there who claim people don't fake plurality related things, they're probably just in denial. I faked all kinds of stuff in source. Seizures and all kinds of other shit. Anything can be faked.

I categorize faking into three categories.

Bait, attention-seeking, genuinity

Bait fakers are your obvious trolls.

Think a person in the MOGAI community that only "coins identities" that are offensive to practically everyone and based in slurs the coiner cant even say. Bait. That person isn't really MOGAI, they're faking.

Attention-seeking is a lot of your average faking

these are the people you've known your entire life who randomly started ticcing after coming across a tiktoker who tics. They'll tell you the have Tourette's, but only seem to tic when its convenient for them. My faking seizures would have fallen here. I only did it for my peers to like me

Genuinity fakers are harder to explain

To me, genuinity fakers are people who get something personal (other than just a silly little kick) out of faking. These are people whos lie is elaborate, not sloppily thrown together and who feel they get a mental boost by pretending to be something they're not. These people are commonly something of an adjacent identity and don't know of it, or they aren't really faking at all. They just don't know that yet. I hope that can make sense

Bait Fakers are the worst. These are the people who choose the worst guys they can think of. Oftentimes Hitler, Stalin, Dahmer, etc. And they post the most godawful things you could find. They make a tiktok account and talk about how they want to really genuinely hurt people in the most disgusting of ways. They're trying to make us seem fucked up. And it works a LOT of the time. These people are the reasons we have to hide ourselves. That really sucks.

I dont think- unless for the purpose of interacting with this specific blog/in this specific discord community- attention seekers exist for us. If they do, they're just gonna get harassed

Genuinity fakers i have the most sympathy for. If you feel healed by pretending to heave Remerez, and you arent doing anything wrong or trying to make us seem bad, I'm not going to stop you. I physically couldn't stop you if i wanted, so if you arent hurting anyone, why would I go out of my way? Chances are high these people are factkin, diauntrho, facthearted, etc etc. I just hope these people find the term that works best for them so they don't have to lie to themselves anymore

Thats how I feel about fakers at least. I'm not making you guys agree

#problematic factive #problematic source #factive #problematic introject #introject #plural community #system #plural #sysblr #plurality

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desudog · 7 months

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listen man if you were not acting on the intent to manipulate someone for your own benefit it was not abuse. kinda sounds like you're just autistic in a way ableist people assume is threatening and have bad social skills. unfortunately a lot of people will call any relationship that ends badly abusive because that's just how they see it. it's a misuse of the term and an awful way to interact with your fellow humans, but it's sadly common. you are not an irredeemable monster you are just a guy who got really unlucky with the people you ran into in life. it sucks. but there are people in this world who will show you kindness and see you for who you are. you just have to find them. i love you and i hope you find them soon. you can get through this

Thanks. I've always thought that too but it just keeps happening with people I didn't even think would be like that to anyone...

but I do agree about the throwing around of the word it's why I don't call the way anyone who wasn't an adult when I was a kid and hurt me, abusive to me because I feel like it's not a genuine thing to say. Sometimes people are just liars to me.. it's whatever. It's sad but I don't think doing it a lot to me is abuse I just think it's rudeliness and confusing because if someone doesn't like me why would they make it repeatedly...

I do have some good friends right now but only 1 I talk to regularly, but I'm just worried that if I am hurting people like everyone else who used to be a good friend maybe, than I'll hurt them.

I feel like I don't know what abuse is anymore... like I'm always told "that was abuse when they did that to you" but then the same people say than I was abusive and I don't know anything. I feel like I don't know any words some days when it comes to the ways people hurt me and it's bad enough I don't really have a lot of words for my feelings and for hurting in the first place. People will call anything stalking so than I dont,want to call the way I was obsessively followed and photographed and videod in high school as stalking because I don't want people to think I meant "stumbled upon their remade blog because of a small fandom" or something... I feel like every word that means something really big and scary is being misused for something really small so that people can get more concern and wich hunting out of it which is really frustrating but also maybe I'm a bad person for saying that and really because everyone's problems are not bigger or smaller than someone and it's not a contest but it makes me not want to use words because they don't mean that and my words mean other things then and to other people and I can't say what it really means because even every word in that means the other thing? I hate the sort of discourse culture around this stuff it makes it so impossible to know anything ever. I don't understand anything ever so I really rely on people to tell me when I'm being something that I shouldn't be because it hurts people but then they can be wrong and hurting me too? So its hard!

I dont know what abuse means anymore. I don't know where intend starts and stops.

I don't think my high school stalker was trying to hurt me. I think she just really liked me and couldn't take my rejection as a 'no' and wanted to see me lots and I think that's on its own whatever it is but it hurt me and they didn't want it to hurt me but it did so was it abuse? When I wanted to them stop and they said no was that abusive when they didn't want to hurt me they wanted to just be closer... by copying everything about me and following me home... but it was scary.

I worry its like that... like maybe I'm doing something without noticing its hurting people and that's what's make them leave me a lot.

I used to think the people who didn't like me were just being rude, but that was before it was a lot of people. It wouldn't matter if it was a lot of impersonal people but it's people I know and talked to and thought about.

And I'm just so confused and tired these days.

Sometimes I'd at least wish people hated me a lot publicly so I could know why they did but they do it quiet and far away so I can't.

I wish I was a person who could simply stop loving someone just because we're not friends anymore. I don't know how to do it. I miss everyone who's hurt me. I just hope they're okay really... that's kinda half of why it's so scary to me.

I really hope I find them too but I'm also scared I won't be enough for them, and when they see me for who I am, they'll know that the me they'll see is not enough. It's hard because finding someone who isn't immediately hostile to me is hard enough and people are just being more and more hostile because the internet culture moves towards it and then the social culture outside the internet becomes that too...

I find people I think who do care about me truely but it hurts to know I'm not enough back to them. I can't really say anything when they talk to me. I feel like an old grave somedays. Worst of all its not even I'm so tired. I really can't bring myself to care about some stuff.. and I'm just kinda tired of it and I have a lot of baggage I struggle working through about the way people talked to me in the past and I get scared of sounding like a broken record.

But I don't need to talk about that because it's not unique, but really I mean that in a non-self put down way... everyone online basically has some version of the story where someone took advantage of their kindness and how much they cared about people, and they sacrificed themselves for someone who didn't want or care about them when they needed it. So I Won't even get into that.

But really. I do get sad with myself because like.

I say to people I wish we talked more but a lot of the time it's all my fault we don't. Talking is just so hard. I hate that I'm a person who only has energy to talk when talking about things that are sad or that are about fire emblem. So I come off as bitchy to people because I don't know how to talk about other stuff... I don't know a lot of communicating stuff about happiness and I don't really feel it a lot... I enjoy some things but it's not really that strong or talkable. I see my fish and my chickens every day... they make me happy. I like to look at my fire emblem stuff... every few months my younger brother will play a fire emblem game with me and we get to bind but he otherwise doesn't really like to talk to me for long even if we have that interest and he's also really busy with school and my older brother doesn't hang out with me anymore much and hates and makes fun of my interest when I even try to compare it to something in passing... and my little sister doesn't talk to me at all. So I don't really talk to people off online... so I can't really talk about that with people. Like maybe I talk about the weather or what I ate for lunch but then it's still nothing after that and then I talk about that too much if I do.

So all conversations end up like

Me: so how is everything

Them: bad and stressful

Me: yeah its bad and stressful to me too

[All conversations now about life being stressful and sad so then they don't want to talk to me because it always ends up there and that's a downer]

But most of all I wish I knew where people saw I was scary really more than anything I wish I knew that one. I used to be a bit meaner coming off so I would use tone indicators but then people said I was lying for using them so I stopped and used really nice language and was very careful and apologized and said nice things but people still said it was scary and bad. So I don't even know...

Obviously misandry isn't real but I always kind of have to wonder if the perception of me as a person who grew up a boy is something that makes people scared of me and inherently worry I am trying to sexually harass them or only want them romantically or am trying to hurt and attack them or that I'm angry and scary... if I was even 2% more of a girl I may wonder if it's transmysogyny but I still identify as a boy and not really a girl more like an animal thing...

Like they don't do it to other people but assume im like that. They don't act like any other of their autistic friends are dangerous or disgusting or attacking. Just me. When I express sexiality it's disgusting and scary or when I express kindness its obviously apparently scary flirting and grooming of an adulr(?) And when I talk about myself it's conditioning and predatory. I just don't really....

Sorry if any of this is rambling or badly written I didn't go back and check it or edit while I wrote because I'm so tired as it is 2 in the morning and I can't go to sleep because I'm so sick in my nose and lungs and throat maybe I have a cold or something. -_-

#thank you irs a really nice message and lets me type a lot and think of a lot ...

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acidmatze · 1 year

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Could I ask all 25 for the chose violence ask game? I would love to hear what you have to say.

Took me ten minutes to find that reblog again. Hope youre even still around to read this, anon

the character everyone gets wrong Maybe not Everyone but like.. 95% of the fans and "fans"... would be Gojo, hands down. None of you write him correctly. I know cuz i talked to Gege and he attacked me with a shovel.

a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom I dont have or need one cuz Vash is a switch.

screenshot or description of the worst take you’ve seen on tumblr Basically every post that calls Gojo egoistic or describes him as an asshole who makes fun of people for the sake of it.

what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person? I dunno anymore. I think someone was disgustingly Pro Hero Society or something in the bnha fandom like... years ago.

worst discord server and why How am i supposed to know every discord server?

which ship fans are the most annoying? Cruise ship fans, ba dum tss.

what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them? Every popular character on tumblr i think? Luckily they are never in my fandoms so its easy to avoid them.

common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about Already answered that in 1.

worst part of canon Trigun is inherently perfect And in jjk... i think Naoya himself is the worst part.

worst part of fanon Someone once wrote Gojo wrong and everyone since then everyone has done the same

number of fandom-related words you’ve filtered I think i have like... 3 fandoms blacklisted and thats it

the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them The ACTUAL Gojo, how he actually is in canon and everyone should like him because he isnt a piece of flaming garbage like fanon Gojo.

worst blorboficiation I legit dont know

that one thing you see in fics all the time Vash sleeping with his prosthetic arm on??? Hello???? Do you people sleep with glasses on and in jeans and are also set on fire cuz thats how uncomfortable that would be.

that one thing you see in fanart all the time All fanart i see is perfect and gorgeous and has no flaws

you can’t understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc) I dont know why everyone is horny for fanon Gojo when thats just Crappo, their shitty OC.

there should be more of this type of fic/art There can never be enough autistic!Vash

it’s absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on… Mechanic!Vash. Give that man a regular job like he deserves to have. Nothing sexier than a man working with heavy machinery.

you’re mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like… If i like something it means its good, even if its just good to Me, and therefore I am not ashamed or horrified.

part of canon you found tedious or boring Nothing that comes to mind

part of canon you think is overhyped Again, nothing really.

your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores All the amazing jokes Gojo makes. That man is a comedy genius and people should write him accordingly. Also i would have said "The tummy hurty scene" in Trigun 98 but people lately have been paying attention to that so nvm.

ship you’ve unwillingly come around to None

topic that brings up the most rancid discourse "But Wolfwood is actually still a child because I ignore canon and refuse to actually interact with canon cuz trying to start a fight in the most peaceful fandom ever is somehow my hobby. I am totally normal."

common fandom complaint that you’re sick of hearing None Well, no violence here.

#ask game #i should tag these so i wont have to spend eternities trying to find them....

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amy-the-fairy · 2 years

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hi, i have followed you for a really long time but i dont think i can anymore. i saw what you said about pro ship and i cant interact with anyone who defends stuff like that. pro ship isnt as simple as not caring about what people ship, its purposely only shipping couples that are taboo, problematic, or otherwise harmful and i cant support a blog knowing they might potentially reblog something in the future that might harm me or my mental health because they thrive off of my past traumas and abuse. im so sorry. i hope you have a filling life x

Are you even reading me? I said "some say it mean you don't care about what people ship and other think it mean you support everything vile". You are the second case. Why would I bother try to understand the vocabulary around morality in shipping if none of the two side even agree on what word mean what.

And you think that someone who literally post about loving fluff, try to push the popularity of a manga because the male lead actually respect the heroine, constantly talk about the toxic vision of love that everyone have and couldn't be more vanilla in her taste "thrive on off on your past trauma and abuse"?

See it's why I didn't want to reply to the first ask. You don't know shit about me, you just assume, not even because I said I was pro ship but because I said I actually didn't care about this kind of things.

You're free to leave, at that point you didn't need to send me a resignation letter. It's your choice to put me in a box based on me basically saying "for the love of god keep me away of this kind of discourse" if it's enough for you to think that I even have sexual fantasies at all.

I should be the one who is mad with how fast you were to pin on me something this disgusting just because I refuse to be a part of Tumblr and twitter crusade over shipping.

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wasflypaw · 3 years

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no, i definitely don't follow you. someone sent me a screenshot of the post right before i sent the ask. we've never interacted outside of this since your blog was one of the first i blocked. i don't remember the post specifically, but it was in the main fandom tag for technoblade and caused a bad attack. i'm glad that you're no longer main tagging those things. people in this fandom need to be more respectful.

Hi, gonna address this in a few points. I might go off on a tangent bc I got a lot to say and your ask has given me the opportunity to speak about them

1. I'm genuinely sorry you had a panic attack over something I posted and I dont mind you blocking me if something I posted caused you harm - in fact, I encourage it. I've blocked a lot of people who've posted things that have made me uncomfortable so I'd be a hypocrite to get upset over that

2. I've had a look and I dont see any negative posts of mine in the main Technoblade tag? Just posts about his content and fanart so if I were to find/edit/take down the post I'd have no clue what to look for

3. I was pretty c!Techno critical back when I started this blog and it was mainly to do w his fans attacking cc!Tommy and his fans that caused me to have a negative reaction to c!Techno himself. I'm a Lot more sympathetic towards his character now, while I dont post about him often anymore. It's the same with my feelings towards c!Dream - I see a post that invokes negative feelings and it just ends up triggering my RSD. A Lot of my critical posts are posted during Bad Times or breakdowns but I'm working on this - I've blocked any post and blog that have made me feel this way and I've been feeling Much better the last few days. This random is a first for me - where people group themselves into which characters they enjoy and argue w other groups and I get,,, carried away sometimes. I've made an entirely new blog for just Discourse Free Happy Things and have been focusing more on stuff that makes me happy now so I think I'm getting a bit better. Nothing against the people posting said things that I've reacted negatively to, its absolutely not their fault for my reactions and they're not ppl I personally dislike (I cant know or dislike you personally from what DSMP opinions you have, your opinions do not imply or effect your IRL morality, said opinions just make me uncomfortable and that's about it)

4. I'm not sure how I feel about people sending you my boundary post two minutes after I posted it? The only reason I can assume is they're sharing to mock me or talk about me behind my back and I mean this genuinely, if you do that hardblock me. My blog is a space for me and people who enjoy my posts - I dont feel comfortable with hate follows. I may be jumping to conclusions but being told "someone sent me your boundary list after you posted it" while in said post I mention my Severe Anxiety is not a good combination. Alongside the person who is purposefully private quote tweeting my Twitter posts after I've repeatedly said not to and it's a boundary and I have "NO PQRTs" in my username,,,,,, genuinely stuff like this is making me consider shutting down my blog and my twitter account and starting anew somewhere else. Please if you dislike me or my posts just dont look/block me, I'm begging at this point

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tokugou · 3 years

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Hi. First: I love your GIFs! They're pleasing to see on my dash (and sometimes gives me niggling ideas for creating GIFs of my own but almost never do it cuz procrastination and my creativity sucks haha 😅)! Please keep creating! <3

Second, genuine question (and out of curiosity): Why do you self reblog your posts often? People can see your posts on their dash, and even on the search thingy. The search thingy doesn't let people see your self-reblogs (just the original post). Even though I've kinda been on and off of Tumblr for years, I don't really get how it works, so I'm a bit confused as to why you and other bloggers self-reblog your/their own posts?

You don't have to answer if you don't want to, though! I'm just genuinely confused and I don't know who/where else to ask/search 😅. Thanks in advance! Have a nice day! <3

I honestly don't know what I did to get dragged into this discourse

Thank you for polite question, I honestly don't know if I can help you a lot and if my answer will explain it as you expect. I also was on and off tumblr for a long time and often, but I can answer it based on my own experience on this becasue it was confusing to me too when I first met with self reblogging.

Long reply under read more so to not trash other people' dash

first of all self promotion isn't a bad thing and i'm staring to think some of people here see it as a crime

compared to old one nowday t/mblr is a mess, lot of people left this site and most of them were content creators (either artists or gifmakers) and back then it seemd more welcoming to editors? People would rb your stuff no matter your popularity becasue hey it is content from my fav series i wanna see more i wanna keep it on my blog and show it to others so there was no need for people to self reblog becasue it circulated around a lot on its own.

new people who join this app are raised on i/stagram t/itter and/or f/book where LIKES means everything, you show your support by liking posts THIS NOT APPLY TO TUMBLR AND NEVER DID [you can check this amazing post about rebloging]. As nice as it is to get likes on your post becasue it is like a pat on a head - it is only a pat, doesn't mean anything on a long run. Reblog = spreading. If people don't spread it we stay unnoticed and we tend to self reblog more.

another thing that changed is: people no longer scroll from top to the last post they saw before going to sleep, cos why would they? You wake up in the morning open app while eating breakfast or drinking coffee and you sroll past ten or twenty post or an equivalent of hour or two of your absence - you dont go deeper cos it would be a waste of time - again, I say USUALLY, some ppl still do this and it is ok either way - which leads us to main point of self/reblog:

DIFFERENCE in TIME ZONE not all of our followers live in the same time-zone, when I post something in my free time it doesn't mean others have it too, most of them are probably sleeping or in working place at that hour. We self reblog so people who were absent (and we think might be interested in - becasue why not? they follow us for a reason right?) can see it when they get back on here. By reblogging ourself multiple times, that puts the post back on the follower’s dash and hopefully gives them a chance to see it.

most of people follow ton of blogs (one of my friend I met here told me they follow over 1k blogs) imagine even half of these blogs posting regulary, a few things per hour, the dash is messy and crowded OUR EDITS TEND TO GET LOST IN IT. Most of people follow a lot of blogs and might miss our posts becaue their dashes are WAY more active than these who follow five or ten blogs.

t/mblr fandoms aren't welcoming to new creators in my experience, to get notes you need to be popular/have lot of followers but you can't have lot of them if your posts aren't spread/seen and so on and so on it go in circle (a lot of ppl also only reblog popular posts and avoid these with litte of notes - don't know why it is like this, maybe they think these posts are suspicious?) so with self reblog we also give some of these fake notes to make a post more appealing, i guess? this one is just speculation.

the search function you mentioned is very rarely used tbh people don't go to search for things daily, they usually only do this when they join new series/ship/etc to check if there is something. People usually stick to what they see on their dashes. AND most importantly this option doesn't work as it should. It is some type of algoritm that promote post that are alive/active - even if your post is relativy new it might not show in search becasue it died quickly (as if it wasn't interacted with for some time). With search option it is 50/50 your thing either show there or not. ALSO REMEMBER search option is a terrible promoted thingy that doesn't show you everything so you better stick to /tagged/ thing you can enter manually while on dash if you are using web t/mblr.

people no longer go straight to specific blogs to check if they missed something, they might do it for their besties (as they call it) but other than that DASH is all people see and focus on, so the more often content creators self/reblog the higher chance followrs will see it.

we are not paid for what we do and it come to everything: edits, gifs, arts, writing, video and META POST we are not paid for it and no matter how many people say notes are just numbers these numbers are our motivational payment, the less you get the less you create because you just don't feel the point of sharing your creations if it is not received well or at all.

when I started posting I used to post new content daily even twice a day, nowdays seeing most of my edits not being well recieved in fandom I lost motivation to the point I was thinking of quiting because it didn’t give me joy anymore and I'm still considering it.

I personally never felt bothered seeing self rebbloged post, I follow a bunch of content creators, some of them sr twice a day some each hour, some more or less often. It often helped me to see something I would missed becasue I wasn't here and personally it often give me joy to see the post I remember seeing that had 2 notes when I rb it and now it is 500 or more.

to anyone who read it and still think self reblog is a bother: do not tell people to stop self reblogging. If you genuinely have a problem with self reblogging, just unfollow or block the person who does it and don’t make a fuss over it!

I hope I managed to answer you at least partly? I probably lost the point somewhere between first sentence and second but... well

#chloe.mailbox #long post #anonymous #i keep saying WE as in content creator but honestly i dont feel as if i was part of it

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nightswithkookmin · 3 years

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Does Run ep 119 fall into the period of Jikook's romantic separation/distancing you talked about? By hairstyles I think this is the time you marked as being 'not a couple'? Did I get the timelines right? Please dont get mad, but they seemed especially cozy+close this ep, and not just skinship (I know this is a subjective judgement and dif points of view are allowed). Just curious if you still hold to your theory? We see only tiny snapshots of time. Do you ever retrospectively change your mind?

Me right now. lol

Running away before I give in to the temptation to rumble on for pages. Lol.

Ahhh shit! Too late. lol.

First of all, it's not so much that questions like these irk me...

It's just I've never had to worry about being 'right' or 'wrong' in forming an opinion about anything or on any topic in my life.

I think the night is more beautiful than the day. I think both Trump and Biden are trash- but better Biden than Trump. I think formal education is a damn waste of time and money. I think a lot of things. But I've never had to worry about that I could be right or wrong about them.

I never assume, when I read people's opinions too, that they are right or wrong. I either tend to agree with it or disagree with it or get informed by it if I had zero opinion prior. I find it bizarre when people want to be right and stuff- especially in a community that is nothing but a swirling vortex of thoughts and opinions. Lmho.

You either defend your stand and give evidence to support it but even then we are just all making assumptions.

Also questions like these tend to put me in a position where I feel like if I should respond then I am not only 'defending' my opinions but challenging other's opinions with my opinions and treating my opinions as if they were the facts. But they are not. It's just one opinion against another.

Know what I mean?

I used to be comfortable doing that because I thought it was all friendly debates and discourse until someone drew my attention to it and pointed out to me that when I do that I come across as 'all knowy,' 'presenting my opinions as facts' and 'challenging other's opinions with my opinion'- which y'all are well aware is the case that has launched a thousand hate comments, privacy invasion, doxing, lies and operation boycott Goldy on ship street.

I don't think it's worth it.

Then there is the substantive issue: how these questions are framed. How should I put this...

I never said anywhere that Jikook were broken up during the On era because they were not acting 'cozy'. Who's theory is that? Who said that? I've never peddled the 'Jikook is real because of skinship or their interactions' theory. If anything, I try to distinguish between Jikook's couple moments and their skinship or mere interactions because neither of those two make Jikook real... to me.

If Jikook showing skinship and merely interacting with eachother to you is a determining factor as to whether they are real- it's not, to me. I've made this much clear over the course of my blogs. If it's your metric then it differs from mine and I can't 'challenge' it. Lol.

I have said, Jikook can interact zero in a content and I still could be able to tell if they are a couple.

Similarly, two people can grind on eachother and stick their tongues down eachother's throats and I still will be able to tell they are not a couple within the same group if they are not.

Am I wrong sometimes? Absolutely. Hell, I said JK was going to post for Jimin's birthday. He didn't. I got that wrong.

I do retrospectively change my mind on a lot of things. If say, in the future, Jimin announced he has a kid and is married to a het woman I would backpedal on my theory that Jikook is real. I don't think it's that deep.

If at any one point, I have reason to believe Jikook aren't together any more as a couple within BTS, or that one of them is straight, I would change my opinion about them being in a gay relationship with eachother.

Similarly, if I have reason to believe Jikook have broken up or distanced themselves from eachother at one point, I would say so and not run around the internet yelling Jikook gay, Jikook married.

There are moments, when I thought Jikook were together but they weren't and so I had to change my mind in retrospect too.

It seems to me, that to y'all, as long as I'm saying Jikook are together then I'm right and it's Amen preach but if I say I think they are or were not together at a point in their relationship then suddenly it's, she is a Trump supporter spreading lies about Jikook and dancing in the rain with convicted serial killers while trying to pass off her published work as Jikook fanfiction. It's all very interesting how some people's minds work...

For the record, I said Jikook were broken up within that period because they were not claiming eachother, reassuring eachother, exercising rights of claim and authority, speaking eachothers love language and all the other metrics I have time and again pointed out several times across my posts that they are the qualities that to me make Jikook a couple.

So do you see why I feel some kind of way when people come at me with the, 'they stared at eachother' 'they smiled at eachther' they touched eachother' argument? Y'all must have me confused a certain shipper on the block. Lol.

You tell me they look cozy and intimate, but then I go and check and they are still not claiming eachother or exhibiting any of the qualities that makes them a couple. Lol.

If I say Jikook is in a relationship, it's usually because I have reasons to believe they are in a relationship. If I say Jikook are not together, it's also because I have reasons to believe they are not together. It's really not hard maths.

I forego a lot of sleep to ensure I share my thought process on a lot of my theories and opinions. I have shared across several posts why I believe Jikook is real. I have shared a few of the metrics I use to decide on that opinion and I have shared my thought process on why I believe in certain moments they aren't together.

It's exhausting when I have to repeat that process each time because then it's not about you asking for my opinion on the topic anymore because I've already stated that, it's about you asking me to change my opinion on a topic based on your assessment and your metric and it just doesn't work that way.

Your assertion that Run 119 was filmed in the same era as On is valid I guess... but I have to disagree. I can't tell you exactly when that episode was filmed but if I had to share my two cents on it, I'd have to place it towards the middle of April this year or somewhere around that period. In my opinion.

I say that because Jimin debuted his jet black hair around 14th April when he appeared in a Vlive with RM. Again I do not know exactly when he got his hair changed but as of March 26th, he had blondish hair.

In his March 30th Vlive- the one where JK interrupted Jin's call, he had a cap on so chilee I'm not gonna argue on whether he had dyed his hair at that point or not.

Then there is Suga, who has blonde hair in this Run 119 episode. He had blonde hair from his birthday in early March and tweeted a bunch of photos of himself in blonde hair from March through to April 28th.

Yet in the JinMinGi Vlive on April 27th when Jimin still had jet black hair, Suga seemed to have a jet black hair too. Which means he could have had blonde hair around the time Jimin went black in early April and dyed it black in late April- but that's theory and that's just my assumption. We can know for sure if and when knew content is released which was filmed around that period.

Thus, I doubt if it was filmed during On era like episode 116 and 117- where you could see clearly, Jikook were having issues.

Just because a peice of content is released in succession don't mean they were filmed around the same period...

So yes I agree with you, we only see snapshots of their time and most importantly we see them in DISORDER. BigHit doesn't release content in chronological order as per when they film them- something I keep reiterating throughout my blogs.

And just as a tip for when you want to reconstruct the timeline for accuracy based on their hairstyles, I think you should look to their Live contents and not their prerecorded content. Their VLives and Youtube lives- actual lives not the prerecorded ones passed off as live streams lol, or even their live reactions to when they win awards or do interviews etc.

I think those are a somewhat accurate reflection of the timeline and helps fit contents in their right time period. But even that- it's still 60/40. But that's me. Feel free to use your own metric to access the timeline.

And the part about them seeming cozy within- On Era, I assume? Because that's when I speculated they had a break up?

I wasn't going to address it because it requires me to provide a comprehensive reconstruction of the timeline but I can't do that until a few more years from now when BigHit has released all or most of the content they have on that period.

I'm just gonna have to repeat myself, for the n>th time though and be intentionally vague about it lol - I had decided not to talk about that period again but I have to just because you make it sound like I would go full on frying pan wielding JK on your ass, step for step, for pointing out that Jikook seemed cozy and intimate within that speculated breakup period. Chilee, I'm not a villain. Lol.

I will not whoop your ass for saying that- but you'd have to answer a seven page query if you are an avid reader of my blogs, so clear your schedule. It's gonna be a long day. Lol.

Query: How do you expect Jikook to look like and behave if and when they are not together together?

I keep saying, at the bare minimum, Jikook are friends not enemies. You don't expect them to act like they never knew eachother during such times. But it takes a while for them to settle into that space when they both feel comfortable with being friends and during such period is when you notice them putting up emotional boundaries and distance between them.

Maybe its just because I saw Jikook as friends and got used to them as friends before lovers and so spotting when they are acting as friends comes easy to me? I don't know.

I think it's similar to how people who are used to seeing Jikook as friends can't seem to see past their friendship to seeing them as a couple.

Then there are those who've only known Jikook to be a couple or saw them as a couple first upon entering the fandom and so can't seem to see them as friends or even think of them as friends. It can be a trip for such people. Which one are you?

If you see Jikook as lovers all the time, really I don't. And I don't need the tensions and the silences to sense something is off. JK unable to check RM or anyone within the group when they are crossing boundaries with Jimin is enough tell.

Same way I don't need to the skinship and 'cosy' to tell if they are together. Jk putting up emotional distance with certain members within the group- all but Jimin, is enough evidence for me.

We don't have to all see Jikook through the same lens to enjoy them. And we don't have to agree on everything too.

We are different people, with different backgrounds and experiences. We can't think the same or perceive on things the same.

I keep saying, to me, there is a quality to Jikook that makes them more than friends. If I see those qualities in them, I believe they are a couple. If not, they are not. Those are the qualities I see only between Jikook and what set them apart from the other ships in BTS.

I see their friendship and I also see their other stuff.

And I notice, during certain periods that they lose that quality that makes them couples- for them to be a couple they need to be speaking eachothers love language, exercising certain rights and privileges over each other, claiming eachother, reassuring eachother yadda yadda yadda and a whole others that don't include them merely talking to eachother or engaging in skinship.

When I talk about Jikook On Era break up period, I'm talking about the period from the 21st to 28th February this year- or the period right before it.

Thats the period I noticed a drastic change in Jikook's interactions and even their personalities. It gave me the feeling that jikook had been through something heavy prior to that date. That period seemed more like the aftermath of a break up rather than the beginning of it as there seemed to be a drastic flip in their dynamics compared to any era before that. Especially late December or around the period when they filmed Carpool Karaoke.

They weren't doing any of the things I've mentioned above that to me make them a couple- they were just interacting and pretty much being civil- except for JK. He seemed more angry, less tolerant and very assertive against Jimin and the group.

He was being super self assertive and was asserting himself even against Jimin- something he has been doing a lot this year which I keep talking about.

Jimin didn't seem different to me at all to me in that period until April.

Why do I feel you are forcing me to talk about something I don't want to talk about? Lol.

I mark that period as significant not only because of the changes that took place in Jikook's dynamics but because it marks the genesis of the JK we are experiencing today.

Their interactions within that period were reflective of a consistent pattern of behavior they've exhibited around periods when they are not together- JK putting up boundaries, not claiming JM, JM trying to reconnect etc.

For instance, at Music Bank on the 28th of February, Jimin did that thing with Jin when he noticed JK interacting with Tae but JK didn't mind him or claim.

Contrast that with their moment on the 1st March, at Inkigayo, where JK literally teleported his ass to stand behind JM when he noticed JM had started his shenanigans on the stage.

Jikook started claiming eachother and acting as a couple again from then- they started reassuring eachother and doing all these things that to me mark them as a couple. Again, this is only an assumption, I don't have the comprehensive breakdown of the period- yet because there are new contents being released on a daily.

On 6th March, during Music Bank when Hobi hugged Jimin during their interview JK reacted strongly to that too in my opinion.

On 30th March, JK interrupted Jin's call to flirt and ask JM on a date- you could see them acting as a couple from that moment at Inkigayo on 1st March throughout to 30th March and their interactions were consistent.

Their interactions in the period before that was pretty much inconsistent and filled with a lot of Jump cuts- which I'm hoping future contents will help fill the gaps for me so I can build a comprehensive breakdown of that era- at least for my self. Iol.

It's just the way Jikook usually behave after these period. They go through a reconnection phase, where they constantly try reassure eachother and then eventually end up in a honey moon phase of a sort where you'd see them flirting up and down the hills, acting super touchy, hitting the red marks- making us and the others feel weird and super uncomfortable watching them.

It's also important to note that around the period of them reconnecting, JK had started distancing himself from Tae. He puts up emotional boundaries with the others and closes himself off to them when he opens himself up to Jimin.

I mean if I'm 'wrong,' and I'm not saying I'm right, I'm just saying if I'm wrong because of your two seconds clip of them acting 'cozy,' then I gotta ask what happened to JK in this period? Why was he putting up boundaries between him and Jimin in that period, and what set him on this self assertive path he's been on throughout this year- think about that while I hold on to my he went through a nasty breakup and had an emotional trauma that pushed him on a path to reevaluate and set his priorities straight theory. Lol

I think some of the content they have released so far within that period were filmed either closer to or far from when that break up happened- Run 116 and 117 would be the closest to that period so far- I just don't know if it was before 21st February or after it.

Run 100 and 101 would also have been filmed relatively closer to that period or immediately after it because Jimin was behaving in those Runs the same way he was behaving during the On Comeback Special VLive which was released on 21st of February- I feel the breakup would happened before this date.

In both those Runs and the On comeback special, Jimin seemed beat, humbled and subdued. He was trying to establish eye contact with JK during the comeback VLive, egging him on to talk about his looks, and putting boundaries between him and the other members. He seemed to be on his best behavior.

For instance, in the Comback he seemed like he was walking on eggshells around Kookie and didn't want to create the impression he was going out of his way to flirt with the others or portray himself as available and so when Suga touched his waist or back, he asked him to stop.

Similary, in Runs 100/101 behind scenes or something, when they were eating and he noticed Tae had food residue on his lips, he tried to help him clean it but panicked and stopped the moment he sensedJK lifting his head up- it seemed he didn't want to piss JK off in those two instances. JK for the most part just seemed serious and less tolerant of JM's bs within that period.

Juxtapose JM's behavior in these two instances with the events at Music Bank and Inkigayo where he was hugging Jin and acting extra around Kook- which to me seemed like he was looking for reassurance by trying to get JK to claim him but of course JK didn't do that.

Jimin likes being reassured by JK when he is feeling 'insecure.' And often, JK reassures him when he notices JM going through that. Jimin does the same for JK.

They are intune with eachother's emotional needs and they consciously go out of their way to meet them.

Take the recent MAMA speech moment when JM was giving a speech and he seemed like he need support- emotional support and back up. Jk turn fully and instantly towards him to let him know he was there for him. We've seen Jikook do this a countless times. I value these moments over them showing skinship or screaming eachother's names.

In the recent BE press conference red carpet moment when JM tried it with RM- did you notice JK's reaction? They both seemed like they were trying to piss eachother other off or make each eachother jealous during that red carpet moment.

JM with RM and JK with Jin. JK grabbed Jin's neck when he noticed JM intentionally acting all up close and friendly with his buddy buddy RM and the frown on his face. He didn't seem too amused with JM doing that...

- it's weird, I know, but it's also their way of reassuring eachother and expressing interest in eachother. Don't judge. It's Jikook- just look away, keep it pushing. Nothing to see here. Lol.

Had it not been for the live events around that On period, I probably wouldn't have noticed these things because the content from BigHit around the period were only showing glimpses of their interactions which again seemed like the aftermath of their breakup and not the start of it.

I think their ability to get to that space where they are each comfortable with relating freely and 'cozy' around eachother as friends depends on how soon they interact on cameras after they've gone through such periods.

If they film immediately soon after, or during, often the tension between them is much more evident like in run 116 and 117.

If they film much later from it, then you wouldn't even notice a damn thing at all. In my opinion. Especially, if you don't know the difference between Jikook as friends and Jikook as lovers.

You can never tell though if you focus solely on Jimin's behavior during such periods- because Jimin is just that guy. He doesn't bring the drama to work. He will smile sunshine through the pain and act like nothing happened. For JK it's different, in my opinion.

Jimin has a very high emotional intelligence quotient and seems to process emotions better and faster. JK is not like that. It is why I feel, he tends to put up physical and emotional barriers with Jimin and with the others sometimes when he is going through it.

They all process emotions at different paces. In my opinion.

I'm starting to wonder if y'all think Jikook is one sided at this point. Lol. Jikook is not one sided. Jimin is not the only one in their relationship. You can't focus on him alone to decide if your ship is sailing or in a good place- because guess what? Jimin can put up a show of it.

It's just as how Tuktukkers tend to focus on Tae rather than JK in determining whether they still have a ship or not. If they paid attention to JK for one minute, they would know their ship got lost at sea at debut.

I keep saying JM's 'the boy in love with Jungkook' persona is a facade. He loves JK through this facade but you have to look past it. I mean this is the guy who told Jin JK doesn't act a certain way around him, but backpedaled and said he was just 'saying it for content' when Jin called him out on it. Same guy Jk says, he intentionally acts cutes when he notices the cameras on him.

You gotta wonder what else he does just for content and for the cameras. Isn't this why people claim Jikook is fanservice?

You have to pay attention to JK too you know? They have different personalities, different ways of handling issues, different ways of loving and different ways of solving problems.

Jimin over expresses himself and tries to establish contact when he is at the recieving end of a freeze out. He did the same thing on stage with JK during Manila when he tried to have a conversation with Kook- to squash whatever issues they had been having but JK needed his space physically and emotionally.

Jimin was sat next to Suga chatting with him, asking him questions, laughing with him but the moment Suga touched him he snapped. He did the same thing in Dynamite MV reaction VLive when JK teased him with Suga. He snapped almost instantly and didn't seem happy with it- he doesn't want to be shipped with Suga and yet he is the one constantly going 'I miss Suga hyung' 'Suga and I are the parents and JK is the son"

In run 116, you could see him trying to interact with Kook even when Kook was clearly putting up boundaries with him. Had Kook not been closed off to him in that moment, we probably would never have noticed anything was off with them honestly.

And that hug JM gave Kook in the end, did you see him looking sideways as if he was doing something wrong? Compare that moment with the Siriux FM interview where he had his hands around Kook. He didn't seem- what's the word, scared.

And by the way, that moment was also filmed on the 21st of February in the US, the same day of their Rockefeller interview and the same day the On Comeback Special VLive was released- so do the maths? Was that the start of a break up or the aftermath of it?

Jimin was leaning forward in that period true, but was JK receiving and reciprocating his actions and matching them throughout that period? No. Or may be its debatable- you tell me. Lol.

Jikook behave in a certain way and give off a certain vibe when they are good and sailing- but not all such moments is because they are a couple. In my opinion.

When they get to that good space where they can be comfortable around each other, they sail as friends too.

It's just like, when they are not good and they give off bad vibes. But not all the bad vibes they give off is because they are not good. Know what I mean?

It's all up to how you perceive them and how much you understand of their dynamics I guess.

It is my understanding that, JK opens up to certain other members within the group while simultaneously putting up boundaries with Jimin when he is having serious problems with Jimin. From my observation of their interactions.

So I ask, within the period of 21st February to 28th, was he leaning towards this certain member he was suddenly BFFs with around the time of their break up or was he leaning away from him? He literally teleported away from him to be next to Jimin when they were getting back together and Tae didn't seem amused by that either.

It's Jikook, I get it. I think you need to pay attention to the way they interact with the other members within the group too? Because that's equally telling. Sigh.

It is my understanding that, Jimin is quick to anger yet quick to forgive and he sometimes glosses over things, puts a lot of energy and efforts into embellishing his relationship with Kook and presenting them as the perfect duo and the perfect relationship- which is something that I think psychologically induces the Kumbaya in a lot of Jikook shippers and influences them into thinking their relationship is perfect and kumbaya. But that's another topic for another day.

JK makes Jikook more real. To me.

I hear often, people talk about how Jimin is less touchy than JK and has personal boundaries within the group and how over the years, he has toned down on his touchiness with the other members because JK puts up a lot of boundaries for him around the members with the frying pans and what not, and would fume whenever Jimin or anyone crosses those boundaries...

But have y'all ever wondered the kind of boundaries Jimin put up for JK within the group and expects JK to uphold within the group when they are together? Hint: It's not JK's touchiness or lack of boundaries. Y'all be connecting the wrong dots. Lol.

Jk puts up physical boundaries for Jimin because that is important to him. Jimin put up emotional boundaries for JK because that is important to him. They overlap sometimes but those times are insignificant to me.

Jk's certain bonds suffer because of Jimin. And he stops respecting those boundaries when he and Jimin are no longer together and the moment they are back together, he puts those boundaries up again with those bonds- this is Morse code, if you catch on message me with it. Wink.

JM throwing his arms around Kook during a serious interview is not him claiming JK or reassuring him. JK yelling Jimin to the power Z is not him exercising right of authority over Jimin- lovers do that. Know who else does that? FRIENDS. Lol.

It's nothing Hobi doesn't do with JM or the other ships don't do.

Listen, I saw all the good bits and things that you saw in that period too and still I formed my opinion on that era the way that I did and have. And the new content from that era, Run 116 and 117 all follow the same pattern of behavior I noticed around that period and have talked about. So no, my view on that era hasn't changed.

Unless, your objective is to have me change my mind based on the 'wrong' timeline dots you've connected, then we would just have to agree to disagree. Lol.

If you believe Jikook were together during that period, I agree to disagree on it. Feel free to disagree with my opinion too.

Always ship Jikook in the way that makes sense to you. And support them while you are at it. Jikook is real. Bless you.

Signed,

GOLDY

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angeloncewas · 3 years

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dont wanna make this ask long bc i am tired and dont have the energy to be a well spoken (?) person rn but it probably will be long anyways, so sorry!! but like. as somebody who has hyperfixated on both idubbbz and schlatt (along with a plethora of other problematic content creators, i really know how to fuckn pick em!!) they absolutely foster a dogshit community, at least outside of platforms like tumblr, where like. you cant really avoid fandom culture like you can on twitter or ig, if that makes sense. on here, if you wanna post about your favorite youtuber, whether you tag it or not, other fans will likely see and if you say some bad shit, you will likely get called on it, whereas on ig basically only your followers will see it even if you use a hashtag and on twitter its like if you arent in a subtwt/fandom then you basically dont interact with any subtwt at all unless its an accident, ya know?

so like. i think what im trying to say here is that while ive met a lot of fans of both these creators, especially schlatt, who are great people as far as i can tell, i am also specifically on the fandom side of things and as soon as i step out of that space i realize that a lot of people who watch them are not actually minorities like me and my mutuals who can catch on to satire or who watch their more behind the scenes stuff where you can see them act like a decent person or even call out people for the things they usually joke about which just. fucking sucks. it sucks that, as much as i do believe schlatt is actually a good person (and sort of idubbbz, although i dont really watch him much anymore for a plethora of reasons, mostly related to the fact that i cant stand his jokes anymore even if he is playing a character as he's said before), he also keeps doing terrible fucking things and im really glad his actual friends have been calling him on it recently, especially after that jackbox video (which is a whole other thing on its own bc it literally seemed like nobody wanted to be there basically the entire video?? like as somebody who watched all the jackbox videos before that one, it was really fucking off in that call and the jokes were next level fucking upsetting), but sometimes it's just kinda like. exhausting. bc his community is already fucking bad now, you cant undo accidentally fostering a community of fucking racist homophobes who dont get that you're playing a character, unless you kinda drop off and build a whole new community from that, which would be stupid to do at this point in his career. not really sure where i was going with this tbh, but i thought i would chime in on this discussion as a viewer of mainly schlatt, but also a past idubbbz viewer who is basically a seasoned fucking vet at dealing with shitty fanbases because of him and many other dumb youtube white boys

(also, note on that anisa thing: ian's main fanbase was definitely pissed just bc she does sex work and a lot of them are too fucking young or just too fucking dense i guess to clock the fact that he's putting on an act bc, like i said before, they either dont watch his behind the scenes content, or they do and they kinda just miss those moments between still trying to entertain where he gets genuine. that being said, a lot of people outside of his fanbase were also pissy bc anisa is a less than spectacular lady if you really do your research on her, kind of a bad person but it's not something a lot of people know about, especially since one of the few videos made on it was by fucking creepshow art)

sorry for the rant again, i feel like i do this every other week now and i apologize, you just seem to have the best discourse and i enjoy partaking <3 hope you have a good rest of your day/night/whatever time you're reading this!

—🦷

Thank you for the input (don't mind the rant !) and I hope you have a good rest of your day too <3 For post length, I'll answer under the cut :)

Yeah, I get what you mean (I think ahdsufsd). Fandom as a concept is pretty... I don't even know how to describe it, but it's the kind of thing that I feel like white male Redditors would think of as pussy shit, y'know? Like the Ricegum gang isn't a fucking "fandom" they're a... well, a fandom, but they're not gonna admit to that. So when you step outside of a community like Tumblr (the queerest place on the internet TM) you come into contact with the faces of the fandom you're dealing with and oftentimes they're a lot less like you than you might've thought from the similar interest. It's like going to a Weezer concert and realizing you're surrounded by incels (this is a JOKE).

Satire's a rough topic because some people don't think it should exist at all. Like any words that can be directly interpreted as bigoted or problematic should not be uttered. I disagree with that, I think it's one of the most interesting forms of both social commentary and comedy, but I do see the problem. There are people who watched Filthy Frank (to take an example from that other anon) and didn't know or care what the point of his actions were (I don't know what they were tbh - I never watched him, but it sounds like he's a pretty decent dude) and instead read his jokes as-is. There are thousands upon thousands of people who aren't gonna get satire and that's a problem because if they're already bigoted they're gonna see people like Schlatt and iDubbz and whoever else as truly validating.

(Largely unrelated but yo, is iDubbz still going? Are the views alright? Is the adsense popping? Has he just kept going with Content Cops? I haven't heard about him since the girlfriend thing dropped.)

"you cant undo accidentally fostering a community of fucking racist homophobes who dont get that you're playing a character, unless you kinda drop off and build a whole new community from that"

I think this is what's pertinent when it comes to discussing Schlatt. After the Jackbox video (for me at least, he might've been there before) he put himself at a crossroads. If he'd apologized, said "sorry, I took it too far, that was a mistake" - yeah, plenty of people wouldn't have forgiven him and plenty of bigoted fans of his would've said that the apology was just to placate the snowflakes on Twitter, but to the sort of in-between people it would've shown that he's able to recognize and reconcile his mistakes. He could've transitioned into content that's A) actually good (when I say that the video was bad I don't just mean in terms of racism, I mean it straight up was not entertaining) and B) less "edgy" for the sake of. I wouldn't expect him to go uwu squeaky clean, but he's already reeled in the bad people, so if he really wanted to foster a good, progressive audience, he has to do something significant to show that.

But he didn't.

Maybe for the sake of his career, maybe because he likes those bigoted fans, maybe because he just doesn't get it - I don't know. I don't think we'll ever know. I spoke earlier about doing what is right over what is easy and in the case of Schlatt it just feels like he really did take the easy way out. Whoever he is in his personal life doesn't change how he's perceived online and the kinds of people that are idolizing him for it.

(And yeah I saw the video on Anisa when I Googled her to check if they were still dating, but then I saw who it was made by and I was like oh well whatever avhfdfkj)

#this is kind of rambly but oh well #angel answers #🦷 anon #discourse #negative #cc critical #idk how to tag this stuff just telae jsfkbg #long post

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stonefemblues · 4 years

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i guess i will say one thing about who can claim certain lgbt identity terms...

the problem with this discourse is that we are working with historical terms that developed in a community that doesn't exist in the exact same form anymore. yes individuals and communities that use these terms still exist, but we have completely different understandings of gender/sexuality now, we have different political contexts, different threats to our community, different survival mechanisms, our communities look completely different. so basically like... it's really not possible to perfectly translate those historical terms to a modern context, there’s a lot of nuance and i dont think there is one right answer. different people and different communities will interpret these terms in a modern context differently and that's not necessarily a bad thing.

because they are terms used for communicating yourself to your community, the important thing when using them is making sure that they are relevant to you and understood by your personal community. and “community” does NOT mean every single lgbt person in the world, or everyone on tumblr. we say “lgbt community” a lot but there is not one big cohesive lgbt community. your community is the people around you that you interact with, the people you learn from and share ideas and support. the terms you use for yourself must be able to be interpreted correctly by your community. my community may not be the same as your community, so i might use terms differently from you and neither of us are necessarily wrong. even in the historical context, there may not have been one perfectly unified definition for a term because there were a variety of communities back then as well, not everyone in the past had the same viewpoint.

now, i’m not saying that this means its impossible to use a term incorrectly. there are still some interpretations of terms that i feel are disrespectful either to its history or to the communities that use them today, or just straight up don’t make sense, which defeats the purpose of using them because they’re supposed to be able to communicate something... so sure i have some opinions about the definitions of certain terms, but i’m still not the ultimate authority on them, and overall its not a discourse that i think is worth spending time arguing about unless people are using it to spread bigotry or direct harm to my community. i’ll share information about the terms that i think is valuable to learn from, but ultimately people are gonna use words how they see fit and i can’t change that.

tl;dr shits nuanced, and i’d rather spend my time building a supportive community than worrying about someone random on the internet using a term in a way i don’t like.

#this is ok 2 rb #please do NOT assume my opinions on terms based on this all im saying is that its NUANCED #and yeah this is mainly abt the butch/femme discourse but can apply to some other terms too #snail.txt

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incarnateirony · 4 years

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Thing is, I once enjoyed your meta, was part of the "positivety police". But when you started attacking ppl who want more to see DeanCas as canon, I didn't understand your aggressivety. Nowadays, I only see the likes of you and Casgirlsam defending win*est, reblogging win*est, arguing how stupid Destiel shippers don't appreciate Win*est, even though it was the most famous ship or sth. Saying how everyone against it is just purity police. That's why no one takes you serious anymore. And it's sad

Oh look more bullshit. *looks high and low for anywhere i defend wincest*

*encourages my blog followers to look high and low for anywhere i defend wincest*

Oh you mean that time i told people to stop dogpiling a nonaggressive person in fandom minding her own fucking business while saying i dont like the ship but she doesn't deserve you being a bunch of thundercunts? That person who doesn't hang out with the aggressive shippers that attack people? Who literally was so respectful she didnt just tag everything but made a side account for her squick ship so others didn't have to see it, and mysteriously you go out of your way to look at while claiming to hate and be triggered by it?

You seem to be confusing "thinking you have no right to relentlessly assault someone in their own space" with "defending a ship i have been extremely vocal against", and, in irony, you even can't control yourself while I'm flagging your IP and interactions enough to approach your ISP for service termination on its harassment clause.

By the way-- "positivity police" ends at me not accepting abusive cankers like YOU coming into MY space or speaking up when you get SO OUT OF HAND you negatively impact someone's mental state, which you show zero empathy for right now.

As if anyone from yeshims ring, who use that phrase, were ever friends of mine anyway.

The world is literally burning, people are dying by the hundreds of thousands, protests are worldwide, and you're online trying to manufacture drama. Given you at least stopped libeling the lgbt author with shit you made up here at least. Now try that for the other made up garbage. Find something constructive to do.

This is the last ask I'll actually respond to from you, statcounter quantifies engagements you send even if I don't reply and I'm not gonna clutter my blog with negativity you are DESPERATELY seeking platform with. I'm sure you'll cry POSITIVITY POLICE WAHHHHH for me not giving you that platform and taking up space on my blog that NEWS FLASH, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO ANYWAY. People don't come to my blog to read made up drama bullshit. Traffic slow on yours, it seems. If you weren't insufferable maybe you'd have enough platform to make up shit and get the attention you're after on your own blog. Try it some time.

My blog is not a ship war blog. Get it through your thick head or I'll have your ISP get it through your head for you.

If you think not having free right to someone else's space for abuse is "positivity police" you have some deeper problems going on and definitely aren't welcome at my blog till you clean that shit up. My tolerance for abusive personalities are negative-nothing.

And no son. Someone defending their own space and voice firmly isn't abuse. That's the narrative an abuser tries to spin, so lemme head you off there. I can and will drag you folks that wanna be big and bad @ me. You're used to getting away with it on other blogs with other personalities. I have been trialed by real life events that make these pitiful attempts laughable. Deal with it.

Get over yourselves. You're an anon nobody. I'm not gonna get on the lgbt history deletion train because some anon coward wants to spam my inbox. I will not go down on that wrong side of history. I am not part of your ship war hype you are mapping out in anon all the ways you are addicted to the war, not the content. To the attention, not the value. That aint this blog.

This behavior even looks ridiculous to most people in highschool. And i don't know about you, but i graduated high school a LONG fucking time ago. Actually more than an entire K-12 over again ago. This is not a blog for children; not because i post explicit content, which I don't, but because it's centered on discourse of politics, theology, history and yes, bodies of text. Not bored kids who can't figure out how to be constructive and spend their entire day fabricating nonsense to flatter themselves with digital pissing matches. I spend my days phone banking and fundraising for dozens of progressive organizations to liberate people but please, go off that your random nonsense that you literally make up is somehow woke.

That's not to say people under 18 aren't allowed at all. Again, i have no explicit content. Some people under 18 are mature. That is not what I'm calling children. I'm calling people that act like children, children. And i don't care if they're 22 when they do it.

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whowearsthecatears · 4 years

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💫 🌸 🌟 dear jojo fandom, stop being mean to people that haven't read the manga 🌟🌸💫

I am so tired of this. There are lots of possible reasons why "anime onlies" havent read it

Consider the following:

They struggle with reading comprehension

They dont want to

They cant afford to buy it and feel uncomfortable pirating it

They dont want to

They dont have the time or energy to spend on it right now

They dont want to

They like watching it in anime form better and would rather wait until its animated so they can experience it for the first time their favorite way

They dont want to

They like to watch it with a friend(s) or family member(s) and it's not as easy to share the experience when you're reading it

They dont want to

Theres probably countless other reasons why someone hasn't read the manga and any and all reasons should be respected

I fairly recently had an experience with a pretty popular artist on instagram. They post sbr content that I actually really love, I love sbr, and they seemed like a really nice person and all that?? But then they were posting a lot on their story being pretty passive aggressive to anime only fans and going on about how sbr is the best and sbr fans are the best and they just want everyone to read sbr already bc then it would fix the fandom or something. I sent in something like "hey please stop bashing people who haven't read the manga, I struggle with reading comprehension" and I was super anxious to say that but I was getting fed up and they responded actually pretty nicely? They were like "oh I'm sorry! I didnt mean to make anyone feel bad" but then after that they were still like "but I think you should give the manga a try :)" which, looking back now, really makes me feel like my point whooshed right over their head bc they were STILL trying to push that shit on me. They were doing it "nicely", but they were still doing it.

Anyways, they were also posting part 5 fandom discourse (I plan on making another post on that) which I really CANNOT handle at all anymore bc I'm a big part 5 fan and it triggers my rsd. So I sent them a nice message, saying I would miss their art but was going to unfollow bc I couldn't handle the discourse and I know I didnt HAVE to do that, they're a popular artist and would have never noticed or cared about my unfollow but I wanted to do that because it felt right and I just wanted to. They responded basically being like "okay bye" and maybe it's the rsd but I feel like they could have been a lot nicer and at least thanked me for letting them know why I was unfollowing them and complimenting their work. The more I look back on this the more I never want to interact with them again. I dont think they're a bad person, I dont hold this against them, I still love their art, I dont think anyone should attack them. But this mentality, especially among popular artists that have a wide reach, really needs to stop. It is so toxic.

Tl;dr: stop being elitist, let people have preferences

(yes, to clarify I HAVE read sbr and stone ocean and I plan on reading jojolion at some point bc I'm addicted to jojo and cannot stop myself but when I read sbr and stone ocean I sure as hell did not absorb half of that shit and had to find my understanding by talking to other people and watching videos and all that which kinda happens to me with the anime too but not nearly to the same extent)

#jjba #jojosbizzareadventure #jojo #phantom blood #battle tendency #stardust crusaders #diamond is unbreakable #vento aureo #stone ocean #steel ball run #jojolion #loading this tf up with tags babey #okay to rb #please rb

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jewpacabruhs · 4 years

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hi guys! so this post is gonna be a rambly mess but fuck it, here ya go. if u dont wanna read all of it, u dont have to; skip down to underneath the tl;dr in bold text for the important bits :)

(there’s a brief & non-graphic mention of a triggering topic in the next paragraph. please be sure to skip this next paragraph if the thought of suicide is going to upset you.)

alright. so i didn't share this originally, but i spent some time in a psychiatric unit this month. suicidality related. 1000% unrelated from anything online, i've just struggled with depression for a very long time & shit happens. i didn't intend to share that at all & i certainly don't want pity; i'm telling u guys bc my time in the unit was extremely eye-opening, and i have some insight to share. since i've gotten out, with the help of my newest anti-depressant (fourth time’s a charm lol), i'm seeing the world in a better light & i finally have the energy to and the interest in exploring what it has to offer, which frankly i've never had before.

with that has come the realization that i’ve come to do something very unhealthy, and i want to break out of it. and that’s how much i’ve come to rely on my fandom life. i don’t want to get too candid publicly, but mental illness took a lot from me, and i lost most of my life, my future, and my options in the last few years. next year will involve a lot of working on rebuilding things. but in the time that i let things fall to pieces around me & i absolutely couldn’t get out of bed, i had a phone and i had a laptop. so when i couldn’t get up and physically face the world, i built up a new world online.

and i don’t think that’s a completely uncommon experience. most people are able to better manage things, and evenly juggle real life with an internet life (like i did back in middle school), because most people can’t abandon their real lives entirely like i managed to; but i do think a lot of people nowadays rely on their fandom life and their fandom friends when their irl situation isn’t ideal. and that’s an excellent coping mechanism in theory, but i think it’s debilitating in the long run.

forgive me for sounding like an old person, but i’m a heavy nostalgist and a bit of an anarcho-primitivist in that i resent modern technology's influence on society - but that hasn't stopped me from letting it be a big part of my life out of accessibility. the internet kept me occupied during my low points, and i became dependent, but i've realized i don't wanna live like that anymore. i’m vaguely grateful that it usually kept me busy enough that i wasn’t thinking the bad thoughts as frequently, but more than anything, i’m resentful that my grasp on reality got lost somewhere along the way, and i let time get away from me, too. because, again, an internet life should be a fun hobby, but when it’s a lifestyle and it becomes an excuse to avoid dealing with our real lives, bc our real lives aren’t as rewarding or as exciting, then it’s unhealthy.

everything’s at our fingertips these days, but i deeply believe human interaction, fun, and fulfillment shouldn't be spoon-fed to us through a screen. it's easy access, sure, but at the end of the day, is it any way to live? compared with how much world there is to see, i’m no longer satisfied with the thought of sitting behind a screen for another five years. i used to be, when i had no hope and no drive, but not anymore. i’m not gonna let myself settle for staying busy with the thing that takes the least amount of work & movement. not only because i’m a whole ass adult who needs to start sorting my shit out for the long run, but also because i deserve better.

and it’s fucking hard! especially for those of us who are neurodivergent. i dropped out of school three fucking times due to crippling social anxiety and utter lack of ambition and energy. i lost all my friends through that (making friends post-school is hard af); the thought of having to go out and remake friends makes me wanna fucking cry. i have a hard enough time making friends online, i’ve even come to struggle with correspondence thru text & email. phone calls? outta the question. but that’s therapy shit, and i know i’ll get there. i just have to stop putting life off by staying in a comfort zone.

and it’s interesting; depression and anxiety really took everything from me, and while i was dwelling in my own misery, my adhd worsened and decided to make my entire brain revolve around my fixations, so i didn’t have to deal with my own life. can’t think about how much you wanna die and how much you can’t function in society if you’re busy thinking about a ship you like or a character you find interesting. so i latched onto the safety of that. aggressively. problem with that is that once you let your “happiness” (as much of it as you can feel in the midst of your depressive episode, anyway) revolve around an interest, that’s all you have. so you become dependent and reliant, and that’s never good, especially if you’re someone like me who feels pathetic & ridiculous when you realize it’s all you can bring yourself to care about.

and i think that’s what i realized in the psych ward (where there’s legitimately nothing to do; i did soooo much more thinking than usual, and i already think too much haha); mental illness will try to fuck up your lifestyle, so you have to eradicate the things that’ll let that happen in the first place. for example, like i said, my adhd tries to counteract my depression by making me hyperfixate and/or hyperfocus on something else to protect me from bad personal thoughts, and that’s good in theory (doing something you enjoy when you feel bad, to distract urself, is the number one most basic coping skill you learn), but i can’t do it in moderation, i let it run my life, and that’s made me worse in the long run. so i have to force myself out of that completely and not let myself fixate on things that make me happy in the short term, but don’t ultimately further me as a person. having fixations helped me through some awful times, but now i need to force myself to grow up, you know?

and while tumblr and other social media is an excellent way to indulge those fixations, it’s an aggressive enabler, in more ways than one. what i mean by that... okay, so while i’m the type of person who self-destructs while unhealthy, i do occasionally lash out. and i know some people completely explode rather than implode when they’re not doing well. and that’s how you get discourse, i think. because when mental illness makes us care much more about our interests than we ought to, and someone has a differing opinion about that interest, the instinct is of course to attack, if you’re that kind of person. i don’t think i am, but depression and boredom go hand in hand, and i might be inclined to care more about discourse than i would if i were healthy, purely because it’s entertaining and something to do.

that’s a long winded way of saying, while i stand wholeheartedly by my past positions, i do regret starting shit in the first place. i’m not the kind of person who genuinely cares about much and i have little to no sense of morality (im a chaotic neutral bastard), so the fact i was bored enough to start shit really goes against my character and says a lot about how bad i’ve been. so i apologize for all that. but, again, i think that's just what happens when something is truly your everything. and i think the chronic negativity of modern fandom is a result of how damn seriously we all take it, because we care so much and we’re so dependent. fandom’s supposed to be fun, but it’s just too damn stressful this way.

idk my point in sharing all this, but i do think it'd be cool if this kinda got yall thinking. even if you don't engage in discourse, if fandom is just one of your only consistent sources of happiness, that's not healthy either. we all gotta break out & exist more & louder & more positively. and unfortunately i think tumblr fandom (and maybe all modern fandom) is no longer a place that encourages positivity and health.

but for all my criticism, i do just wanna say how eternally grateful i am that i was fortunate enough to meet the people i call my best friends through tumblr. they're my family, truly, and all the bullshit in this fandom has been worth it simply because it brought them to me. i love them to death and i always will, even if interests change, even if we grow apart, even if we quit speaking entirely in the next few years, i love them with my whole heart in a way that transcends a simple fandom friendship and i'm so glad we bonded over sp in the first place. that’ll never change.

i will also always love south park itself. now that the cat's outta the bag about my hospital visit, i can brag about my most pathetic and obsessive accomplishment; the fact that i've never let circumstance stop me from watching a new south park as it airs, and i've now watched sp on 1) an airplane, and 2) in a psych ward. i win for most dedicated fan tbfh. dsjkf & i'll keep that tradition, and i'll still watch this stupid show til it ends! it'll always hold a special place in my heart, & kyman's still my most meaningful & long-term ship. i'll never stop loving it.

tl;dr

so, to recap; for 2020 i'm making myself step back from fandom (not just sp fandom, but fandom in general) and quit letting my world revolve around my fixations so i can enjoy the outside world a little more, mental illness be damned, and the first step is gonna be quitting tumblr. this blog won't be deleted and i may occasionally post (maybe when next season airs) but you're absolutely free to unfollow bc this'll be a mostly inactive blog. i’m also unfollowing everyone, so mutuals, please don’t take that personally.

i will, however, try to write more prolifically, bc fic writing is something i'm able to do in moderation & enjoy, and i hope to get back into it. so if you'd like, you can keep an eye out for any upcoming fanfic i may post - my ao3 is leere. i also have snapchat, instagram, & twitter my mutuals can ask for asap (bc ill be logging out for good by the afternoon of the 31st, which is tomorrow) - though i'm not very active on any of them. still, if you wanna have access to me, i’ll be there.

i want some connection to the fandom still, albeit without letting my life revolve around it, so i'll be starting a new open-to-the-public kyman discord server! the post with the invite for that will go up soon. nvm im too anxious

thank you for reading, thank you for the good times (thnks fr th mmrs), and i hope everyone has a good 2020!

#txt #mine

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