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#i dont mean to make this many posts but replys hurt me like this
scalpelsister · 2 years
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anxious attachment won a bit tonight lads ngl
#this is technically vague posting so im hiding the meat of it in the notes#not mean spirited vague posting lets be clear. more anxious mentally ill vague posting where i know i am being insane.#bc a friend has ghosted me for almost a week. not a big deal but we have plans in 3 days. plans we have been working on for a year.#and so now of course. my anxiety ran brain with every abandonment issue one really could have is like. not having it#did they abandon me forever because they hate me now???? did I annoy them? am I sending TOO many texts to check in or#am i not sending enough and I need to ask them if they are ok?#are they ok? did something really bad happen to them? did their phone break?#are they avoiding me because they want to cancel plans or they wanted to go to the event with someone else so now theyre going to#ghost me until after the event to try to make sure I dont show up because I suck that much to be around?#has anyone ever liked having me around? my parents do not seem to like me. how could i expect others to?#why dont people like me.#etc#it is the mental illness spiral from logical concern of like#weird they arent replying when we have plans. hope they are ok and safe#to full conspiracy theories about them plotting against me to hurt me and humiliate me bc they hate me that much#to the through line of everyone on earth hates me and i should never socialize ever because i suck and ruin others lives and happiness#so. thats a logical conclusion i am sure#thats sarcasm i know its illogical and yet. I do still feel that way.#my most unrealistic fantasy is finding someone who enjoys my company and will talk to me more often than 1x week#because i often go 3+ days without hearing another human being talk#like by often i mean that its entirely possible for me to only talk to another person for less than 5 minutes a day#outside of dnd which. hard to schedule but about 2 times a month? and getting to see a friend once every 2-3 months its like#so rare for me to be able to talk to people#its horrible i am operating on a level of loneliness and social isolation that is extreme#im not saying others dont have it worse but like. its bad in here!#and i think that only makes me come across weirder bc im so out of practice and then also it makes my abandonment issues worse bc#i am literally abandoned rn#and so its a bit like. am i even being illogical and stupid for having issues with attachment? like it seems like actually the logical#conclusion based on my life thusfar. the idea that everyone leaves me and hates me seems to track#why is life as a social creachure so hard
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kindestofkings · 6 months
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what came first, the chicken or the dickhead [2/3]
[smau]
f1driver!reader x lando norris (eventually, friends to lovers ofc)]
authors note: THANK YOU SOOO much for the love on part one guys I'm so overwhelemed 🥺 hope you guys enjoy this next part <33
yourusername 
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Liked by landonorris and others 
yourusername I'm sorry, the old Taylor can't come to the phone right now
Why? Oh, 'cause she's about kick off her first season with ferrari xx
view all 580 comments 
landonorris shes in her reputation era 💅
yourusername i've trained you so well
ynfan1 I'm so excited to see you in that red car ❤️🔥
Racerbia I can't believe my bestie is a FERRARI DRIVER
yourusername I know can you believe it!! best of luck with your season this year <33
charles_leclerc I did not know you joining the team would result in me learning so many taylor swift lyrics
landonorris just you wait until she starts sending you fan theories.. yourusername charlie you'd get an A in taylor swift theory and lyric knowledge, dont fight it !! f1fan she calls him charlie they have to be dating!
ynfan1 charles_leclerc what's your favourite Tswift album?
charles_leclerc I think its Red charles_leclerc (TAYLOR'S VERSION THO) yourusername phew that was a close one
​​taylorswift never seen a getaway car driver look so good, knock em dead 🖤
yourusername omgomgomgomgomgomg mother, I mean miss Swift its an honour landonorris oh thats why shes inconsolably crying alex_albon is that what that scream was? ynfan2 shes been broken
scuderiaferrari
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scuderiaferrari red era vibes with our dynamic duo locking it down here in bahrain! our two drivers are ready for sunday 👊
view all 290 comments
ynfan1 the power of yourusername, converting the whole ferrari team into being swifties 😂
yourusername you know it! I'm a swiftie first, a media nightmare second and THEN a f1 driver
f1fan enough with the pop culture comparisons. what matters is the race, not taylor swift. Let the performance do the talking
ynfan2 how sad is your little life??
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yourusername 
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yourusername P3 babyyy, while your out here running your mouth still I'm busy getting on to that podium. Bahrin you were beautiful, thank you to the team and to charles for all the support this weekend, and just in general ❤️
congrats maxverstappen1 on opening the season with such a surprising (not) win! was a fun fight 😂
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maxverstappen1 think you going to be a reoccurring problem now!
yourusername it me hi! im the problem its me xx (liked by taylorswift and others)
ynfan1 I never expected the f1/taylor swift cross over but i love this
f1fan making the tifosi so proud  👊❤️
maxfewtrell fantastic drive, so proud!!!
yourusername maxi my boy <3
charles_leclerc posted to their story!
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-@carlossainz55 would never have done this to me 😞
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f1wagsupdates
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f1wagsupdates in the week coming to the monaco grand prix, it appears the two ferrari drivers are spending time together with leclerc's family! seems like a bit more than just teammate bonding 👀
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yncharlesshipper wow the family, must be serious
ynlando4ever please please please be besties
ynfan1 its getting hard to be delulu about this 😀
yourusername posted a photo to their story!
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Mwahahahah mama leclerc the women than you are
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charles_leclerc when did this exchange happen 😂 arthur_leclerc 😂 😂 😂 😂 landonorris troy bolten and justin beiber call they want hair tips x
yourusername
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yourusername MONACOOOO its race day and you best believe I'm bringing my A game in defensive racing. il predestinato will break his monaco curse if its the last thing I do 😤
charles_leclerc starting p1 go slay this thing bestie!!
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charles_leclerc the best 👊
scuderiaferrari teamwork makes the dream work 🔥
f1fan gasly could NEVER with the teamwork
ynfan1 ouch that bestie has gotta hurt 😬
charles_leclerc
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charles_leclerc best. day. ever.
winning in red and winning at home has always been the dream, thank you thank you everyone for the support in getting here! special thanks to yourusername for the incredibly defense and helping reach my dream 🫶
this one's for you, monaco!
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scuderiaferrari we always knew you could do it 👊🔥
yourusername CHARLIEEE always knew you could do it !
carlossainz55 amazing felicidades
charles_leclerc thank you thank you
maxverstappen1 hate to lose but congrats mate!
pierregasly living out your destiny 💪 that was all you charles!
ynfan1 pierre try not to make a petty comment challenge: FAILED (liked by yourusername)
f1fan monaco belongs to you, il predestinato!!!
yourusername posted a photo to their story!
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they both prefer each other over me guys help 😭😭
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landonorris my best girl 🥰 -> me?? so kind! landonorris 😑😑
I just tagged a few peps that I thought were waiting out for part 2! let me know if you're not comfortable being tagged :))
taglist: @kissesandmartinis @kissesandmartinis @vellicora @reidside @leclercin16
2/3 , part three is coming later tonight its gonna be fluffy i promise 💓
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hrdenha · 9 months
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— office hours | p.js
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synopsis: you're stressed, still a virgin, and wanted to get laid. you wanted it to be a complete stranger. luckily, for you, there's one who's been watching you from the vip rooms.
pairings: stranger!park jongseong x office worker/virgin!reader
warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. drunk reader, still with consent of course, basically asking some stranger to get her virginity, jay's big 👀, fingering, penetration, breeding kink, c*ck warming, oral s*x (f receiving)
AUTHOR'S NOTE — !
and i am backkk! it's been awhile since i posted here but tbh, i still have so many drafts in this blog. i dont know when i can finish it and post it but I'm hoping for the absolute best. please, turn a blind eye whenever you see errors and misspelled words. this is not yet edited and i just finished writing this a few minutes ago.
oh! and don't forget to check out some of my works and enjoy! also, let me know what u think in the comments or reblogs 🫶
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"So, let me sum this up..." Ryujin held up her right hand for a 'pause' before drinking her Starbucks cup as if she needed the strong savor of coffee to stay sane on something that was about to go on.
"So you wanted to get laid but you're still a virgin and you don't know someone who can do you?"
Is it just you, or did ryujin just emphasize the words 'you', 'get laid', and 'virgin'? Is it that hard to believe? Is the idea THAT crazy?
"Yes, and please lower your voice" You hissed at her which Karina chuckled, all while trying to cover your face with your right hand; as you turned your head back when a group of employees walked past the three of you.
"How about, chan?" Karina suggested. "From the I.T. unit? He looks so good and IS good"
Both you and ryujin make a revolted face, "Ew. How do you know?" The woman beside you asked that karina just responded with a simple shrug before looking away to sip on her coffee.
You shook your head, "I don't want the person to know me and vice versa. I think I need a complete stranger to help me... with this" The word 'stranger' dragged in between your teeth when you groaned at your so-called 'problem'.
"Is that your new fetish?" Ryujin teasingly smiled at you, jutting her eyebrows up and down, making you roll your eyes.
"but seriously what? we can't just throw you to some man on the street, y/n. what if he's a good-for-nothing asshole?" ryujin replied with karina agreeing on her side. "But seriously, y/n what's the rush? I mean, I'm not the sentimental type of a person obviously..." The blue-haired woman rolled her eyes, "but would it even hurt if you wait a little bit more? for a person you know and are comfortable with?"
You exhaled, karina has a point though "I know but it's been bugging me. I don't like rushing things like this but it keeps me from experiencing 'that' level of fun. It feels like I'm missing something. I want to live my life a little, not that I'll sleep with everyone I laid my eyes but you know? Having fun without thinking of some limitation is such a temptation."
Both of your girls nodded, telling you that they understand. "Okay, let's go with plan B. After work this thursday, let's go to this bar I knew" This time, it's your turn to nod silently thanking your friends that they're supportive.
Your mind flies elsewhere as you try to convince yourself that your choice is fair, something that was not bad but also not good.
You're not lying when you told your friends that you don't like rushing things like this. Originally, you just wanted to go with the flow. If you'll get into a serious relationship, which is far away to happen because you're a career-oriented woman— then you'll give it to someone who deserves it. Of course, you had a fair share of relationships; a tough one on top of that.
Maybe it was the trauma. Having a relationship running for almost 2 years and then suddenly opening your eyes to see your boyfriend, heads up manipulating you was exhausting. That's why you didn't hesitate to break up with your boyfriend who tried to manipulate you into having sex with him while having a sexual relationship with his branch manager in a strictly no-office romance setting.
Of course, it didn't end with just the breakup. Of course, you wouldn't let him prey against other women again. No, it's not your type at all. You wanted to cripple him... big time. And so, you print all his soliciting of nudes amongst the women in their branch and the sexual conversation with his manager he's been having an affair with; even manage to ladle some CCTV footage where the two of them had sex in one of the office room then sent it anonymously to the head office of the company which resulted in his and the woman's contract to be terminated.
After that chaotic incident, you never opened up your heart to everyone. You just basically drowned yourself in work that resulted in you becoming the head manager of your own team.
At first, you're contented, happy even. You stepped up your game at work with nothing but your schedule as the first source of conflict in your life. The fact of you, being not in a relationship and a virgin on top of that, didn't really matter to you except last month when things started to happen.
The corporation you've been working at got a huge project that resulted in all the manpower to work causing you to be a little irritated. It's not the first time you handled such a huge project but if incompetent people will continuously be incompetent, then someone will definitely be on edge for days. You're convinced it was just the fatigue and stress. Of course, what else could it be? but then your cousin, Jake, told you otherwise.
"You're a little bit snappy these days, y/n" you smelled the oddly familiar aroma of Macchiato behind that even you can't help but to taste it on the tip of your tongue.
Jake emerges from behind you, mumbling a soft 'here' as he gently puts down the glass of the drink he personally made that he knew your favorite.
Your hands immediately glued to the cup taking a delicious sip before looking up to him, humming as the familiar taste of sweetness and vanilla hit your tongue, "It's nothing, just got a big project so we've been working nonstop"
"You need to relax"
"Believe me, I will..." You nodded your head, not looking at your cousin while your point finger keeps scrolling through the documents. "Just not now, maybe after this because work is currently kicking my ass off"
"Nah, bro. You don't need to wait for your work to finish in order to relax. You just need to get laid and then it will all go"
After Jake told you that, how can he walk out of your room as if nothing happened? Now, how can you function properly when you are mostly convinced that you really need to get laid in order to remove all the stress?
At first, you become in denial. You tried doing it the traditional way. Got yourself your favorite scented candle, play your favorite movie, a nice warm bath, and your friend, the pink vibrator after you bridged the project into a success that made the company give your whole team a two weeks vacation and an added bonus.
You become contented again. Turns out you don't need a man and sex just to relax, right? Wrong. Not until another project came up and you were on edge again, that's when you accepted your pain and resorted to your friends that put you in this situation.
Why can't God or someone high above drop a respectable, career-oriented man like you with a big dick and high stamina to fuck the stress out of you, straight on your lap? But no, that would be too good to be true.
Days easily passed by and here you are now, at Karina's house while she attempts to doll you up. You're used to wearing make-up, also because of your job where it is needed to look presentable at all times. What you're not accustomed to is wearing makeup with the purpose of getting laid.
"Drink this" Karina hand you a glass of water? Your hands took it unconsciously but give her a confused look where she just mouthed 'vodka'. That's when you realize all three of you have your own 'vodka' in your hands.
"... for what?" you ask carefully still confused as to why they drink vodka when there's a lot or you mean a LOT of alcoholic drinks at the bar later. You saw the two women behind you look at each other in the mirror before laughing. "Aww, this poor thing" Karina coos, "Luckily, she have us" Ryujin pouted before walking on your supposed-to-be outfit that was still in the box that she had delivered this morning.
"You need that so you'll be tipsy even before we get to the club" Karina replied when she saw your still confused face. She holds a makeup brush in front of you before whispering, "Don't worry, little tiger. We'll sharpen your claw and make you run free" You close your eyes tightly at the thought while feeling the brush on your lips. Dang, are you really that old potato?
"Try to be bold, y/n... remember that" Karina whispered as she brush another dab of the 'boldest' color of eyeshadow on your lids just like she said. "You're confident and bold, and we love that but it's not for the right thing as of now. This is not the job, not for hunting clients or something. Your purpose is to get laid, to have some dick in your mouth, okay?" ryujin added that made you playfully hit her.
"And... done!" Karina squealed, softly tucking an unwanted hair off your forehead. "Damn, you're so hot!" The girl made a 'cat claw' with her hands teasing as you stand in front of the full-body mirror across her room.
You were wearing a red mini dress that has a perfect cut-out on your solar plexus, partnered with a stylish necklace and simple earrings. The color made your hair and sultry makeup stand out.
Yes, you look good and you'll give karina and ryujin a thumbs up for helping you with the right make-up and dress but also, you can't help but cry inside when the skirt would slide up when you walk making your hands automatically pull it down again.
Ryujin slaps your hands, "No! No touching the dress, I'm not gonna let you slouch all day just because you wanted it to be below the knee length"
"It keeps riding up!" You pouted, "It's helping you get a dick tonight by practically displaying your ass" Ryujin replied before clicking her tongue, "Just let it slide the hell it wants, you look fine. Dang, you look so good, girl!" She added before pulling the three of you outside with the taxi waiting.
The bar was loud and dark. It has a bright light flashing in every direction and was packed with people. As the three of you walk towards the tunnel, the loud music slowly become prominent, the same with people greeting the girl you're with. "Karina!" Some guy called that she just responded with a kiss, "Who's this?" He asks looking at your figure up and down. "I didn't know we have a new meat coming up"
"You'll taste it if it wants to be eaten later so watch out but for now, we're here for a girl's night out and no boys are allowed" Karina responded for you, slightly pushing the guy out of the way and pulling both you and ryujin inside. Karina's action made you sigh in relief, you were getting uncomfortable at the guy's stare. It felt like he was stripping you naked. Will you be able to pull this off?
"How are we supposed to talk?" You talk loudly at ryujin's ears which made her laugh. "Just relax and have fun, y/n. Let it all out, just relax" She said patting your back before giving you a drink that karina ordered before.
"Have this... hope this helps you calm down" And she's right, you indeed got calm as the sweet taste of the cocktail hit your tongue. A little while and you were downing drinks after drinks. You even pulled your friends into the dance floor yourself, you were indeed having fun. In fact, too much fun.
It was just a cocktail, but you down a sweet cocktail into a shot of tequila real quick. And no, you're not drunk and you know it. You still know what you're doing, still, know what you're saying, and can still process what is happening around you. It's just that you were far more relaxed than the first time you walked through the entrance of this bar.
As you dance with your friends on the dancefloor, your eyes thoughtlessly linger on the second floor where the VIP rooms are located. And there you saw a man in a full expensive suit that perfectly fit and hug his body— standing on the veranda just in front of the stage where the dancefloor was located. He has a drink in his left hand while the other was tucked away in his pocket. You don't know if you're seeing this clearly but you swore, you saw him looking down directly at you. The man was sipping on his cup, hooded eyes still looking at you, watching you like a hawk observing its prey.
You want to blame it on alcohol, you were getting brazen and you like it. If it's true that the mysterious man WAS really looking at you then you have to give him a show, right?
And so you started to dance more sensually, feeling yourself like there's no tomorrow, even biting your lips. It was a bonus that an equally sexy song played at the right time. That made your hips unconsciously grind, making your friends hype you up even more. The time you look up again, the man was gone. Not a single person was standing on the second floor. The man suddenly vanishing in your eyes made you feel disappointed but didn't let it ruin your fun. Now, that's your main agenda, aside from hunting for a dick, of course.
When the song finished, you excused yourself from the dance floor to fetch yourself a drink. Well, that goes your social battery. It finally hit zero and right now, you need ice-cold water to help with your burning body. You walked towards the counter and requested your drink. Enough with the dance, now, all you want to do is drink in peace.
Which men never really understand. The whole time you were there, a handful of guys try giving you their company but you politely turn them down, not giving them a chance to see through you even though you can feel the liquor slowly hitting your senses. Your eyes unconsciously traveled towards the second floor where the reticent man was standing before. The rooms look expensive plus there are bouncers standing at the entrance of the stairwell.
If that man was real, then he was surely loaded. Lucky.
Your mind woke up when there was a shout coming from the other side of the bar. A fight just broke out and they were causing a scene. You don't know why but your head turns again towards the stairs going upstairs to the VIP rooms. The bouncers who were standing there before were now gone, maybe to assist with the fight.
Your lips slowly curved upward, feet straightly walking towards the stair and onto the second floor. There's a series of rooms and you took your time looking inside each of them. Finally, you reached the room at the far corner of the hallway. You were about to pull the lever handle when you noticed it was not closed, the door was just slightly agape and music was coming inside.
You slowly push it open and see a man in a suit sitting on the couch with papers on his hands. There are a few bottles of liquor on the table. Wine, Champagne, beer; you name it and it'll be there.
The man quietly looks at you, still waiting for your next move. You didn't know if this is the same man you saw earlier. But one thing is for sure, he is handsome: aura never failed to make your skin shiver.
As a career woman, him sitting expensively on the couch with a folder in his hands, while wearing black specs and a watch was so hot to see. It made your mouth water. It was as if the man was a blessing from the heavens and you really like him.
Your mouth can't help but release a giggle at the thought before finally letting yourself in and closing the door with your weight, your fingers turning their locks.
Maybe it was the alcohol, the liquor in your system was making you bold... making you brave as if you were in an illusion. You were in a perception that you mostly can do anything at this point.
You started walking in his direction, the man raise his brow, throwing the paper at the table not really caring if it got wet before shifting his position. His arms were now resting at the top of the couch as he manspread. Damn, he's so sexy.
His exorbitant suit really matched this place. The warm light that elucidates some parts of the room made his skin glow. He was so perfect, his eyes are soft but his thick eyebrows make them narrow and his hair... his perfect black hair slicked back completed his look.
He's a 10, a heaven on the place called Earth. You wanted him that's why you finally did the sole purpose of why you're here.
You approach his face and the manly fragrance immediately hit your senses, he smells good almost like a sophisticated noble. "You... I really like you" Your fingers seductively played with his tie before tugging it harshly closer to you, "Can you take my virginity... please?" Your voice drawled, staring intently into his eyes so that you can even see them mirror your lines.
It didn't go unnoticed on your sight the way his adam's apple bobbed, it made you release a snarky smile. "I believe you're drunk, miss" He coughed trying to compose himself and he didn't fail. The vulnerability you saw earlier fade almost immediately at the same time you noticed it.
"Too bad... I can clearly see you being turned on" You pouted, eyes gesturing at the forming tent on his pants; his eyes trailing behind.
"And, are you sure I'm drunk?"
"Well, are you?" He asks, the low tone of his voice making your skin shiver. You shake your head, smirking at him before grabbing a half-empty bottle of champagne and taking a drink of it. Oblivious, at the pair of eyes who are watching you with so much amusement.
"So..." You crawled on top, straddling him. Your lips can't help but smirk when you feel him jutting out his legs more for you. "Will you do me?"
"Don't need to tell me twice, kitten" His lips crashed with yours. Both lips molded perfectly with each other, and his teeth tugged at your lower rim demanding an entrance. The sudden stipulation made you smile in between your kiss and the way he deepens it made you think that he can't get enough of you.
The man pulled off from the kiss, heavy eyes setting on you while his hands feel your legs. "Come with me" He whispered leaving a butterfly kiss on one of your shoulders.
He gently pushes you off his lap before pulling you outside. There's another door aside from the one you use to get in, the said door was connected to a hallway where a modern elevator was waiting at the end of it. The two of you get inside and the man didn't waste the chance to once again entangled your bodies. He traps you on one of the corners, closing the space between the two of you with his body.
His lips immediately found yours, groaning when your lips caught him openly. Your arms can't help but unconsciously snake to his neck from the spur of the moment. He grabs your right leg, attaching it to his hips grinding himself on your clothed pussy
'Ding!' The elevator opened at its designated floor. The man pulled you again until both of you stops in front of a room. He snake his hands on his pocket, you noticed something black like a card. It must be a key card since he swipe it before the door automatically opens.
He pulled you in again before closing the door with your weight, kissing you hard again as if it was the first time he ever tastes you. The man scopes you up, both of your legs on either side of his body as both of you kiss like there's no tomorrow.
He put you on the bed, his hands tugging on his tie before pulling it off while his eyes set on you the whole time. You felt your pussy throb. How can someone be so hot just from pulling their tie off?
"Are you really sure about this?"
You didn't answer but nodded instead, the man shook his head. "I need your words, baby" His hands felt your cheeks, tucking your hair on your right ear. You hummed while closing your eyes to feel his tender touch, "I want you to take me" You finally said looking straight into his eyes.
"Just kiss me." And he did. He kisses you just how you like it, just how he likes it. It was as if he wants to devour you whole and you love it.
The man attacks your neck pulling you closer to him while leaving open mouth kisses on the way to your clothed chest. He was an expert, he made you lose your mind with his touch that you didn't even feel his fingers untying the strings from the back to loosen your shoulder strap.
He released a shaky breath at the sight of your bare breast. You felt his hot breath on your nipples and they almost immediately got hardened making him chuckle. His hands started massaging your front, followed by his mouth where his tongue played with your nipple, teeth bitting with your tits that made you lose your mind.
You felt his hands slowly traveling southward until he felt the wet spot on your panties caused by him. He didn't waste time and set the string of your thong aside then plunged a finger inside you that made you moan.
"Didn't even need to lubricate you on how wet you are, princess. So wet just because of me" He said, mouth and finger going back from to torturing both your tits and hole.
Your moan gets louder when he adds another finger and then another. "Fuck... ah!"
"Jay..." He suddenly said still pleasuring you.
"W-hat?"
"Moan my name" You don't know how your brain processed it but you nod. So his name was Jay? This a distinctive way of exchanging names but you love it
Jay eyes all your reaction as he torments you in pleasure. His hands didn't just go in and out but also up and down, even circling his fingers as if he was tickling the deepest part of you.
It didn't take long before the pleasure spreads across your body, the feeling of pleasure from his mouth and fingers mixing into a big pressure inside your stomach. You were practically screaming his new-learned name from pleasure and he was letting you. Even felt him smiling from your skin as you emphatically close your eyes.
"I- ah! gonna... cum! Jay!" You shouted feeling his pace becoming faster than before, making your back arches and head was thrown back at the bed. With one last cry of his name, you finally cum. Jay's fingers ride your high while you motionlessly lay on your back, mind still blown from the orgasm.
Jay lay beside you, his clothed erection brushing on your legs as he did. "You alright?"
You sighed before nodding just looking at the white ceiling, "That was... wow" a chuckle came out of your lips before looking at him. Jay was resting his head on his hands as he lay on his side while looking down at you, "One thing is for sure..." His brow rose, wordlessly telling you to continue. "I'm definitely not drunk"
Both of you chuckled, and you can't help but to stare at him. He really is beautiful. Your eyes gaze on his pants, "Aren't we going to take care of that?" You ask as you felt Jay eyes his erection.
"I don't know, will you?"
Is he challenging you? He didn't even know how you love challenges. You smirked pushing him to lay on his back that made jay smile in amusement, "Definitely" You took the chance to straddle him again, your bare chest giggling at the sudden movement.
Jay's dick was exactly underneath your pussy making you sigh in relief. The adonis sit up crashing his lips to you while you take off his suit then unbutton his polo and finally his well-toned body is displayed in front of you. "Like what you see?" He asks, brow raising at you.
You scoffed playfully, "And what if I do?"
And, that's the last thing you remembered before passing out and finally waking up in bed in the same room you and the man named 'jay' practically devoured each other out. You don't remember anything after you blacked out, and you're not certainly sure if you really took care of Jay's err— problem but one thing you are sure of is that you didn't get laid, well, in terms with penetration, that is.
You enjoyed the night, that's for sure. So, you waited for Jay. You waited for the man who made you see stars the night before but no one came. You also tried finding some notes or any message he might have left but nothing. Jay must've got turned off after you passed out on him last night. Oh well, life goes on. You can't really do something about it even though you're dying to see him again to try to make it up for how he made you feel. But then again, you have a reputation to maintain and so, you prepare yourself to go to work.
"Is it true that Chairman Park's grandson is finally here after years of managing our western branch?"
"Maybe? I'm just hoping he's hot— ah, good morning, sunbae!" it didn't go unnoticed to your ears on how the woman's voice raised a little higher before both of them bowed to you as a respect when you step inside the elevator. You're not a strict superior and have your own issue to resolve so you just dismissed them after returning a simple smile and a bow.
"Oh, so you're alive. We thought you were dead and got your organs sold over the black market." That's the first thing your co-worker, karina asked as soon as you pulled the glass door to step inside. You stared at her dumbfounded, mouth slight agape. "Not gonna let me sit first are you?"
The woman stared and is hot on your heels as you make your way on your own table to put your things down. You're not looking at Karina but you can feel how she rolled her eyes when you purposely do your own thing a little bit slowly to make your friend suffer a little bit. You know how she hates slow people.
You heard her huff a quiet laugh, still waiting for you as she rest both her arms on the lining that made your table's wall separator.
After making yourself comfortable sitting on your swivel chair, you finally look up to Karina; a teasing smile on your lips when you saw your friend's ticking patience.
She exhaled air, "So, what happened? We got so worried when we didn't saw you last night, even you're phone is off-" You quietly showed her your dead phone in which she just nodded. "Ryujin even thought someone kidnapped you" Well... that's not completely wrong, isn't it?
"I'm still alive and kicking as you can see, rin. And, I'm sorry about my lines not being open. I know you two are worried. Don't worry, this will never happen again."
"Fine... so what happened? Did you finally lost your virginity?"
"No"
"What?"
And so you tell the things that happened this morning, leaving all the details about the stunt you and jay pulled last night.
"So, you met this guy who brought you to a hotel room upstairs, blacked out and then that's it? Are you sure he didn't do something to you?" Karina asked, worried glazed over her voice.
You nodded before answering 'yeah', "I still have my clothes on and I don't feel anything wrong with my body."
"Well, that's good. I'm relieved nothing bad happened to you." She sighed, "So, what's the plan?"
You were about to say something when Ryujin ran inside hugging you, "Y/n! What happened? Are you alright?" Her hug was suffocating. This made you tap her, "Tigh—t!" She immediately pulled away whispering a soft 'sorry'.
"I'm alright, no need to worry, ryu."
"Okay, but that's not the only reason why I ran here. I heard that..." The girl signals for her hands to make you and karina scoot closer. "I heard that the chairman's son was here today and that he'll manage the company from now on." Ryujin whispered making Karina nod.
"Nothing new? I just heard about that in the elevator on my way here"
"That's cheating—"
"Everyone to the assembly hall, now!" One of the seniors announced after knocking on the glass, not even bothering to make his whole body go inside the door.
"What is it now?" Karina whispered but started walking towards the elevator otherwise. "Maybe we'll know whether the gossip about chairman park's son is true or not." You shrugged.
You, together with the other employees arrived at the hall not long after to finally take your respective seats. It was full and all the other high end members of the board were there too. "Something's big is coming" Ryujin whispered on your side that made you nod as you waited for the program to start.
"President Park Jongseong will now start his inauguration speech" Said the speaker as the crowd erupted in applauses as two young men entered the venue from the side before walking towards the stage. "President? Woah. He's our new boss." Karina whispered but you didn't care. Your eyes pinned on the man who was now in front of the center podium.
That's...
"Thank you for your warm welcome—" You can't hear what he's saying but you didn't remove your gaze at him. He's jay, right? The one who— wait. Is he looking over here?
You immediately lowkey covered your face and looked down when you realized he did. You're hoping he didn't see you at all. Hell, you're a few meters away from the stage. You're even sitting at the very end row of the chairs. There's no way he saw you.
Shit. You cursed realizing the weight of your actions. You just made your new boss finger you last night. The worst of it is that you even blacked out in front of him. You're fucked, Sim Y/n. You are fucked!
The speech address finished in line without fail or disturbance. Jay didn't even look over your way again much to your relief. After the speech was finished, the new president thanked the board members and immediately left saying he still had things to prepare for and that's the last thing you see 'Jay' today. It was as if nothing happened between the two of you and that he forgot about your existence.
After the event, things got back to normal. Aside from him being the sole topic of your office mate's conversation, nothing new reminds you about the man who does you good that turns out to be your new boss. That's why you're convinced that things finally ended. Well, that's what you thought.
"Y/n, are you sure you don't need us to wait for you?" Ryujin asked standing behind your chair, karina on the side. "No, really. I'm fine. Another slide and I'll finish this presentation then I'll go home. Don't let me take your time to relax." You replied smiling at them. They were convinced and so they finally left you.
It's early in the evening and you bet you're the last person on the floor. Not that you despised it. The presentation was due next week but you have the energy to finish it and so you did. You just wanted to spare yourself another workload next week.
After printing the last page, you decided to call it a day. You were about to ride the elevator when someone called you from behind. You look over your shoulder before turning around and finally met by an unknown guy explaining the unfamiliar voice that called you just now.
"Yes? Can I help you?" You politely asked, "One of the board members asked for you."
Board member? Me? That's weird. You thought you were the only person left.
"I understand, Mister...?"
"Kim. Kim Sunoo." He answered, smiling before starting to walk to show you the way.
"Sorry, I just don't recall seeing you around here." You explained looking at the back of his head. You heard Sunoo chuckled, "Well, we're new here, Ms. Sim."
We? But your confusion was resolved when you heard someone knocking but saw it was Sunoo. "Park sajang, miss sim is here."
Wait, park sajang? Your eyes got wide before looking at sunoo who just signal for you to come inside. Now, that you took a good look at him, you realize that sunoo's the same man you saw earlier at the assembly hall. The one who stands behind Jay, the chief secretary of this company.
"Miss Sim..." You woke up in daze when you heard his voice again. You didn't even realize that sunoo finally opened the door for you. And after contemplating things, you finally took a step inside.
The room was quite dark but well lit with the warm lights shining on the side. The wide glass window overseeing the city lights while a man, you knew was Jay, had his back turned to you while sitting on his table.
No one talked. The silence was suffocating at least, for you. Time finally came where you can't take it anymore and finally braved yourself to say something.
"You called for me, President Park?" You asked trying your best not to sound nervous.
The man stopped on whatever he was doing before finally facing you still sitting on his table with a folder on his hand.
"Sunoo" He called.
"Yes, Mr. Park?" Sunoo immediately answered from the other side of the door. I thought he left.
"I can take it from here, you can leave." You heard a 'yes, sir' before hearing the sound of steps finally fading.
"How are you feeling, Ms. Sim?"
You didn't look at him straight, just keeping your eyes on the floor. You heard him chuckled in low tone. That's sexy. "Now, where is that feisty woman i met last night, hmm kitten?"
"What?" You heard him right. You knew what he meant but your mind is currently blanked.
What's going to happen to you now? Will you get fired? Will you be homeless?
"Ms. Sim..." He called again making you look at him. He started walking towards you. You wanted to run or hide, whatever it is but you felt your body froze. Jay is now a few steps away from you. No suit in sight, just his white simple polo partnered with black slacks, two buttons unbuttoned causing his tan chest showing a little bit to tease. His sleeves were neatly folded up to his elbow wearing simple black bracelet while a glass adorned his eyes surely to read the files earlier. He looks so neat, elegant and... fucking sexy that you can't help but think how he'll look if you he decided to defile—
NO! What the heck are you thinking, Y/n?!
"I'm asking how you feel about last night..." Jay suddenly pulled you closer by your waist making you gasped, your hands automatically touching his shoulder and back for support. "How will you feel about picking up what you started last night?" Jay whispered in your ears and you swear you shivered, goosebumbs spreading on your skin. The only thing running on your mind is how you love to kiss him.
Oh fuck it! You thought before clashing your lips with him.
Jay greeted you with the same desire, playing with your tongue as both of you moan in pleasure.
"This is the office, Mr. Park." You whispered in between kisses. "I know," He replied leaving marks on your neck, "I just can't help it knowing I might lose you again."
"You won't. I promise."
Jay then looked straight in your eyes before kissing your forehead. "Let's get out of here."
Things happened so fast that you didn't even realize how the two of you got down towards the parking lot and into Jay's car. He immediately started the engine before driving away. Jay drove over the hills away from the traffic that explains why the drive felt like a blink of an eye.
You just saw yourself looking at Jay as he parked inside a huge house with an automatic gate that opened itself when his car stopped in front of it.
"Wait here" Your brain didn't have enough time to register his words when Jay jogged towards your side of door, opened it and started picking you up like a newly wedded bride.
"What—! Sir, I can walk."
"Sorry, can't help it" He whispered even though it's evident in his voice that he's not really sorry for the stunt. "And, that's Jay to you. We're not in the office anymore, Y/N."
How did he know your name? Oh, he's your new boss. It's not surprising if he did know basic information about you who's one of his employee. And with that, you simply nodded as Jay ascended the stairs and into a room. He gently puts you to bed as he connects his lips with yours. "Can't run now, kitten."
"I don't have the plan anyway" You replied, removing his polo, yours being the next one to join the pile of clothing on the floor. Jay started kissing your neck on the way to your chest where his skilled hands remove your brassiere in one swift move. He then continued his ventures southward kissing your stomach before removing your office skirt together with your lacey panties completely.
He spread your legs making you shiver in pleasure. Just the thoughts of the things he'll do to you is making you turned on, what more if he finally does it.
"Relax, kitten." He said before diving through your folds earning a moan from you. "J-jay! Ugh!" Fuck, he's eating you so good that your hands can't help but tugged his hair. Your moans got louder when his tongue focused on your clit before adding two fingers on your hole practically eating and fingering you like there's no tomorrow.
He can feel that you're close even if you won't say it or... don't have the ability to say it. You were far up to the stars and he will happily take you there. And just like what you want, a knot is slowly building in your stomach, the pleasure was so good that you finally started to let go following with moans.
Jay hummed on your pussy, riding your pleasure like a good man that he is. Keeping his pace unturned as it sends waves of pleasure throughout your whole body making you breathless.
You felt jay checking on you, ensuring you're comfortable enough as if he didn't just made you lose your mind using only his mouth and fingers a few minutes ago. "You okay? I'll do it now" He asked, innocently. You simply nod, still catching your breath that the man took away.
"Shut up... and, just do me" The man chuckled kissing your lips then pulling away to remove his belt and pants to finally show his hardness.
You propped up through your elbows, "Are you sure that'll fit?" Jay laughed at your worried yet amazed face. "So cute!" He crawled on top of you, "Don't worry, I'll make it less painful, love." You felt him spreading your legs further using his, and he felt how you tensed causing him to kiss you again.
Jay used his hand to run his cock up and down spreading your wetness and hitting your clit on the process. The stunt made you relax that he used to his advantage.
He suddenly thrust, fully. "Fucking shit! You-you're so big, Jay" You cursed feeling the pain on your lower body causing you to push yourself up.
Jay shivered on what you said, hugging your body trying not to fuck you mindlessly. "C-lose... shit, you're so tight" He can feel your hotness. It's making him lose his mind. This is better than heaven itself. You are better than life can offer to him.
"You can move now..." And, he did. No need to tell him twice. He started experimental thrust before picking up his pace when he felt you finally feeling it as your moans became louder, breaths becoming deeper and words becoming more lewd.
"Ugh! Shit, Jay. Yes! There!" You screamed scratching his back voluntarily spreading your legs to make him thrust deeper.
"I'm gonna... J-jay..." You whispered to him. Slapping of skin, moans and grunts filled the room. You were practically screaming all the pleasures, eyes shut tight.
"Cum inside. It's fine."
Jay didn't answer but the way his dick twitched inside let you know he understands. "Cum with me, love" He groaned, hastening his thrust, with one last curse both of you cum together painting your inside with thick white.
Both of you didn't move, still chasing your breaths, trying to recover from the waves of pleasure that's still running through your bodies.
"Don't move..." You whispered on his ears. You felt him kissed your cheeks, "So, this is your newfound kink. You want me to breed you?"
"Will you?"
"Don't mind me if I do." You both laughed, "I need to clean you though." And, you let him. Jay slowly pulled away from your hole making you gasped. You immediately felt the warm and thick cum sliding through your inner thighs and into the bed.
He wear his boxer again before disappearing to one of the room that you deemed as the bathroom. You took the time to slowly sit up looking at the evidence of your purity, and there it is the red stain that looks kind of prideful in your opinion.
When jay came again, he got some towels and a basin on his hands. "What? Can't believe that you just lost your virginity to me?"
"Yes, and no. I don't regret it at all. It's just that... that you're my boss." You replied, shyness taking toll on your system that you tried to hide by laying down and closing your eyes again.
The next thing you felt is a warm towels that jay is using to clean your body, "You alright?"
It feels so nice that you just answered with a hum.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure"
"What are we?"
You felt the towel stopped as if he was also thinking but then it continues, "Depends om what you want. Just remember that I like you"
You opened your eyes to look at him, "Like me... you mean?" He nodded, "But, how? I mean, we just met yesterday night."
"Maybe to you. I know you since the first time I worked at the company. We're both an intern that time. Dad asked me to go work by disguise to let me learn about the company" Jay explained slowly and when your brain process his words, you unconsciously sit up making you hiss and making jay groaned, uttering a simple 'careful'.
"Wait so you're jongseong? The jongseong that we don't even know the last name since you don't have an ID and you wont tell us."
He chuckled before nodding, "There even a time that you doubted me whether I truly worked at the company before." Jay then helped you wear one of his clothes to make you further comfy.
"You just vanished, I thought you're not real."
"Dad made me managed the business overseas. It took me three years to come back again. Last night, I can't believe I'll see you again just a day after I came back. You didn't chang, except that you became more beautiful, but other than that, you're still the woman that I admired. You danced truly enjoying yourself not for the other people and that's when I realized that you're the same person I want to see." Oh, so his the same person that observing me from the second floor yesterday. Jay cleaned himself then lay beside me, he covered both our bodies in the duvet before pulling me closer. I turned around to face him, I want to see him closer.
"I was planning to surprise you at work the next day, not as the president though." He continued, tucking some of my stubborn hair. "But then, imagine the shocked my body went through when you told me to take you. Seriously, my mind went blank. I can't... I am relieved that you walk to me and not another men."
"Whatever it is. Just remember that I like you, and I wanted to know more about this feelings. We can take it slow, I can wait. Just let me have the chance to prove myself to you" You smiled, you can feel that he's genuine and trying to walk on eggshells around you trying not to scare you.
You put your hands on his nape, closing your eyes. "Okay, let's do that."
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© hrdenha 2023
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jayenator565 · 6 months
Text
My Tanthamore Comfort Fics
We were talking about comfort fics in the Tanthamore discord and I realized I have too many for a normal sized reply, so here's a tumblr post instead. In no particular order i've reread these fics...maybe too many times.
I'm just gonna list em by author cause that's easier. Keep in mind we may have different definitions of the word comfort.
@commanderbuffy
650 ft2 - Ok so like envision these girls have been best friends for forever and they've been secretly pining for ages, no sense of personal space, they can read eachother like books AND they were roommates!
The Tanthamore Affair - This fic has everything, one bed, fake dating, celeb au, the fic that changed the meaning of a certain emoji and all the tropes you could want really
@badlance
We've got to find other ways to make it together - this one line says all you need to know
"It is the greatest irony of Jade Claymore’s life to be a certified genius who is nevertheless in love with an idiot."
@spybrarian
More Than Just Survival - as far as 5+1 fics go this one has me in a CHOKEHOLD
I scream at your chest for as long as I must
one night at the start of the end of the world
@ilovemyships (i think you need an AO3 account to read these gems)
you won't believe it (they think we're lovers)
don't wanna pressure (but friends don't kiss friends)
@acre-of-wheat - Acre's way with words should be studied
Network Connectivity Issues - I have never related to a character more than I relate to this Jade
The Dark
The Bite
@jlmichigan
Out of the Cuirass - one of the first tanthamore fics I ever read actually and I still come back to it every so often
@stbot
lay down your armor (come lie bare with me) - saintbot has a catalogue lemme tell ya but this one for tanthamore is just so heartwarming
@overkill-max
Escaping Fate - the Kit runs away fic that everyone needs
Dil3mma (idk their tumblr right now sorry)
A Sword And A Shield (And Everything In Between)
Deja-Brew - the loveliest coffee shop one shot
Jad3dEt3rnal (idk if they have a tumblr either)
This Daydream is Dangerous - cuddly vampire Jade, need I say more?
ana_chronistic (idk if they have a tumblr either x3)
Oops. I proposed. - fake dating x 100, fake proposal it's like fake dating to the next level and I love the growth of communication and pacing in this.
@barmaid-anon
do what you feel now
you want a good girl that does bad things (to you)
fulfill (an obligation) or keep (an arrangement)
we simply don't have time to unpack why these are comfort fics, we're just going to accept it and keep going.
@thecsquirrel
Sword and Shield - I love this look at what post S1 life could have been like for the gang, revisiting Nockmaar, seeing Galladoorn, getting into the evil Elora storyline with Graydon, spending more time with the Nelwyn and in the Wildwood it's just everything
@wigster07
What a pleasant surprise - a fic of one of my other comfort fics, I know it's like fic-ception in the best way possible. If you liked Tanthamore Affair I have an inkling this will be right up your alley
@isabrella @jade-claymore @allthefakepeople @resurrecho
those rumors they have big teeth - BAND AU need I say more? I don't need to but i'm going to, this fic has everything Kit and Jade in a band, Kit's leather pants, gay-ifying songs, MAMA MIA, totally gay best friends who have basically been dating for years but won't admit to it, Jade gets to be a bit problematic as a treat, inner band fighting, what more can you want?
@swashbucklery
meet you where the spirit meets the bones (tanthamore 90s werewolf au) - its a SERIES of these repressed gay DORKS and they're werewolves, there's such a charming way to how this author writes them I legit can't even with these two gays
@onlyshestandsthere
these walls come tumbling down - look, we don't have time to unpack why there's so many were-related supernatural esque fics on my comfort list and I know this is only 2 chapters in but I can already feel the comfort in all the hurt ok I dont even have to wait I already know i'm gonna be rereading this like monthly
I'm gonna have to stop there even though I know i'm still missing some! If someone asked me what my favorites are we'd be here all day XD
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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year
Note
I found one of your sagau posts about language and got me thinking xD
Reader who knows a lot of languages which gets people confused. Are they speaking in their godly language? Are they really that mad that they switched to another language? Why are they smirking like that--- (Aether/Lumine who understood everything trying so hard not to laugh at people's reactions)
Why did I imagine that after a flowery speech Reader delivers a response so blunt the vine boom sfx can be heard---
Reader trying out flowery speech and failing, while the rest of the people in the background are either A.) Trying to convince you that its alright to talk simply (oh now you turn the tables--) or B.) Some of them fainting in devotion/cuteness because their god looks at them so eagerly for feedback
I heard somewhere that Mondstadt is based on Germany and another post about Snezhnaya (bruh whats the spelling 🤣💀) based on Russia, so I thought that while they speak english they also throw in a couple words of their respective language (or in some drunk cases, full out native language). Cue reader just.... 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♀️
Bilingual reader who uses full advantage of their knowledge into making puns and jokes to Cyno----
WE CAUGHT ANOTHER ONE BOYS
YES YES THE PSPSPSPSS NEVER FAILSSS🛐🛐🛐
(subliminalmessagingpspspspsscometomeaskscomepspspspspssubliminalmessaging)
___________
DUDE ive thought abt just making it where Aether/Lumine are the only ones who understand English/ur language and like, while u can (or maybe cant for shenanigans) speak Teyvatian (ew theres gotta be a better word for that?) Theres NOTHING as amazing as the bilingual experience of pranking bitches
Eula gives like a whole poetry book of a speech to you guys to be more responsible abt gliding in the city (its cute <3 shes actually very concerned bc you know you would do sm that would worry her, i mean i know im just flinging myself off of every surface all the time, esp in Mondstadt im not using no stairs💀)
And you just... turn to Aether/Lumine and say smth in English and they bust out laughing
(Or worse, u two are giggling like little shits✨️)
Dont feel too bad Eula, they do this to everyone
(Paimon's constantly on ya'lls case abt it)
Like u didnt even say anything rude (probably), as u explained to Eula, but its like this all the time, sm ppl even find themsleves jealous of this bond you two have got, tho whether they are jealous of Aether/Lumine or you is still still hard to tell,,)
IM SO GLAD ONE PERSON OUT THERE GOT THE FLOWERY SPEECH -> YOU REPLY -> VINE BOOM 🤝🤝🤝 THING I WAS TRYING TO CONVEY
Thats deadass like how i imagine half the time it would be like talking to ppl, esp if ur critizing smth that person was doing lmao (like roasting them)
Its even funnier if like, u didnt hear the vine boom so to speak, like u got ur back to the rest of the characters/npcs while ur talking to this one person and u dont even know u just said smth that's got like one person crying laughing
(KAEYA, aether/lumine, hu tao, KAVEH, Venti, childe, Yae Miko, SCARAMOUCHE/WANDERER, beidou, off the top of my head)
Another one is just standing there in shock, when will they unfreeze? Only time can tell
(Zhongli, jean, eula, keqing, ayaka, ganyu, kuki shinobu, once again off the top of my head theres so many characters at this point in genshin help)
They're just like,, processing still, theyre probably overthinking everything u say bc to them you give so little information 💀 i can see the like transparent images of their thinking faces floating around them now LMAO
(Alhaitham, zhongli again rip, DILUC, kaeya's also laughing at him not just you his stomach hurts help him, Ei, XIAO, ALBEDO, Ayato but he'd also be muffling a laugh, Kazuha maybe i can also see him just giggling n shit, Kokomi, CYNO, Tighnari but also he'll react like its the funniest joke ever while he's trying to actually think abt it, so he just ends up standing there, thinking outloud, then cracking up over and over again lol)
Oh Cyno u sweet summer child, as soon as u started making puns it was over for him, no one can stop you, even if Tighnari can't understand ur language rn he can definitely just sense there's bad jokes being made, esp if Cyno gets it and his lip like, twitches upward or even worse, he chuckles.
(Tighnari's totally getting onto him for corrupting you)
pLEASE US ACTUALLY TRYING TO SPEAK LIKE THEM 😭😭😭
What a cute image, just some of them reassuring us and some of them thinking its cute for trying, and we look around the room when we try for feedback i know i would 😭😭
If i actually got close tho they better give me a headpat or smth
___________
Anyway THANK YOU for the ask!! (subliminalmessingpspspspspscometomeaskscomepspsps)
That was a BEAUTIFUL✨️ thing to read, got my heart doin backflips and shit 😳😊🥰
God this is so long im so sorry everyone
Cheers,
🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘
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Text
could I have advice from my lovely wonderful fellow jewish friends (aka my jewtuals)??
one of my best friends is an ex Christian, and like many ex Christians he has let go of a lot of the things that affected him personally, such as queerphobia. and good for him on that genuinely so proud of him! however, he still carries a lot of other biases, especially antisemitism. I've noticed him spreading antisemitic ideals and false information a few times, and he is seemingly receptive to learning but it never stops.
I try to point out antisemitic biases in my close goyische friends and for the most part they fix the behavior and move on yet he's always claimed to understand then makes similar mistakes within a couple weeks. for example, on Easter he posted something saying Jesus was palestinian. as us jews know, that concept is rooted in erasure of jewish history, Christian supremacy, and is linked to deicide that has historically happened around Easter. I brought this up to him and he claimed he genuinely didn't know, which still pissed me off because he claims to be knowledgeable about this conflict yet occasionally lacks fairly basic knowledge.
just now, he posted something inferring, although not explicitly stating that he was anti-israel. ill have to wait for his reply to see if he was actually meaning to say exactly that. I let him know that that was a slippery slope bc anti-israel can refer to someone who is fully against israelis existing and believes they deserve death (which is obviously abhorrent) to someone who thinks that the israeli government has issues that need to be fixed. still, I think being openly anti-israel in a time when israelis have been openly struggling with so many things, is very rarely a helpful thing to align oneself with.
ok so back to my question. what the fuck do i do? I want to let him know that a lot of his biases are based in antisemitic ideals, yet I dont want to lose such a close friendship. if i have to i will and it'll hurt like a bitch but ill get through it. I just really, really wanna avoid that.
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greggorylee · 8 months
Note
Do you have a screenshot of his responses? Also what year was this?
context
its not the entire emails since there are parts not relevant, like me mentioning unrelated things or complimenting him, etc. the 2nd point i brought up to him but omitted was about the weebish elements of the game that my korean sibling expressed distaste with, and toby seemed receptive to.
my email:
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"On Fri, Sep 16, 2016 at 4:33 AM
Hey there Toby,
Another Tobi here. I'd like to start off by congratulating you on the 1 year anniversary of your truly incredible game. It changed mine and many, many other's lives. However, it hasn't been all for the good.
I simply wanted to address the matter of some decisions you made in creating the game that have expanded in the fanbase and, well, have hurt and are hurting many people."
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"-- Firstly, I have no idea what design choices led you to create Frisk's sprite in such a manner, or whether or not you did this purposefully, but they are (intentionally or not) a harmful stereotype of east asians called yellowface. Which is...very, extremely racist. This has been spoken about by east asian people for a long, long time."
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"-- Thirdly, and this may seem small, but the incest joke. Incest is a very real and damaging thing and should not be taken lightly. It's rather insensitive to joke about the situations that have caused people (mostly children) severe trauma. Similar to joking about rape. You just don't do it.
I bring these things up because your decisions affect others. Is that not what Undertale is about? The effect of your decisions? Unfortunately the effect that yours have made within the fanbase are quite damaging.
Because Frisk's sprite is the way it is, hundreds of either ignorant/uneducated or young artists are now drawing yellowface. This is horribly harmful and spreading a racist stereotype."
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"I'm not trying to hold you accountable for all the harmful behaviors the Undertale fabase make... By no means would that be fair. I just want you to understand that your choices made a ripple effect, and when people are hurt by this and speak up about it, it's important to not, you know, absolutely dismiss them."
toby's response:
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"From: Undertale . <[email protected]> Sent: Friday, September 16, 2016 6:01:40 AM
1. This was not my intention. In order to make the character design less "normal," I gave them yellow skin like in "The Simpsons." Also, by making the skin color unrealistic, allows fans to have more of an interpretation regarding how to draw it.
In the future, if I make more media, I definitely won't create a character design like this. My apologies."
(i find this last sentence interesting since kris is also yellow skinned and it felt like toby just hid their eyes to avoid controversy?)
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"3. Huh? There was no incest joke in the game? OK, seriously, what the hell are you talking about? Please link me to whatever you are talking about. That would be a real issue.
Regarding the tweet, it's real, but I made it in poor taste 3 years ago and deleted it. I definitely would not have made it even 2 years ago and am sorry if I offended anyone with it. I have definitely changed since then and would never make a tweet like that now."
(the tweet in question is an old tweet Toby made joking about fontcest. i also find toby's first reply interesting because he seems to have forgotten about the incest joke written between dogamy and dogaressa post-pacifist. i dont blame him after writing thousands of lines of dialogue, however, when i replied providing him evidence of the "real issue" and asked if he could consider removing it, he did not reply nor address it anywhere else. it makes the claim that he's changed past thinking incest is funny seem less genuine.)
my reply (that was ignored):
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[ screenshot attachments of the dogi incest joke, email sent 9/20/2016 ]
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"1. I very well understand what you mean by the intent behind Frisk's character sprite. Specifically it was the skin color and the shape of the eyes that just unfortunately happened to align with a stereotype, and I'm very glad you understand that."
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"3. I included screenshots of the jokes. When one of the Dogi mention that being married to one's sister is normal for dogs. I'm sorry if it seems nitpicking, and I know that the joke was likely just a joke about how dogs are prone to incest, but it was still in basics a joke with incest as the punchline. I did not try to scare you by the mention of the attempted suicide. The person's alive and okay, my only intention was to provide an example of how serious incest will affect survivors. Perhaps that wasn't the best example to use, and I'm terribly sorry. Again I wasn't trying to imply anything was your fault, just that incest is not an appropriate thing to take lightly, that's all.
About the tweet; it's good to hear, thank you for addressing that. I've definitely said my fair share of tasteless things in the past that I've also grown from."
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"The only thing I ask is that perhaps if you were able, if you could address some of these issues publicly. I'm not trying to pressure you, but I really do think it could make a difference in the behavior of the fanbase. Many, MANY people consider your word as law, and I understand that might be overwhelming, but if you mentioned that Frisk's sprite wasn't meant to be a stereotype and that incest shouldn't be glorified or joked about, etc, it could change some people's minds for the better. For example, a friend of mine who's an incest survivor has to deal with a lot of Undertale fans who create incest content -- he's had to block at least 2,000 people, and that list is growing because more and more are put in public tags on tumblr which put him and other survivors at risk, he's gotten endless attacks and death threats and hate messages for saying "incest porn is bad", and this is a struggle he deals with daily. A lot of those people won't change, but with your word some might, and it would at least give us leverage when arguing for the safety of others."
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"And again I'm not trying to imply any of this nasty behavior is your fault. It seems that you really didn't have any idea, and I'm REALLY sorry to have to bring up the ugly side of your fanbase, I know it's an unfun and uncomfortable time, but the unfortunate truth is that fiction affects reality and how people treat each other, which you've found from the messages you say you've gotten from people saying Undertale has inspired them and made them try to act nicer. I hope it doesn't seem like I'm making an unreasonable demand, I just thought it wouldn't hurt to give that idea a shot. You'd be surprised how much difference your word could make."
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"Thank you once again for listening, it really does honestly mean the world. Your game really did touch my life--and that's the reason I was ever compelled to email you. I am certain that you only meant good and fun when you made the game, and I hope it hasn't seemed like I was accusing you of intentional bigotry. I simply wanted a chance to offer insight so that an artist like yourself can go on to create art that has less and less harmful content, because hey, we all have to comb that stuff out of our own art and mindsets. We're kindof raised on bigoted stuff, so we all gotta grow from it, and we all sometimes need to be made aware of ourselves. I hope that all makes sense, I do hope you understand, and that nothing came off weirdly."
... and that's where i was left, 6 years ago or so. i cannot for the life of me find his follow up email claiming how he didnt want his work to come off racist, but its clear in my memory when mentioning it to friends at the time.
personally i dont think toby is a horrible person or whatever, like i mentioned in my first post i think he just simply doesnt want to face the results of taking public responsibility for the problems in his own game, or even backlash in response to him denouncing parts of the fanbase, etc. but like i also mentioned, it's cowardly to to nothing at all about things you're very aware about. i just feel like if he really was concerned about what i brought to his attention, something wouldve been done in the past half decade. not that he owes me or any of us anything personally, but i just find it disappointing all the same after being given the impression that our feelings and safety matter
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fruitybashir · 24 days
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woah. wtf. I don't even know what I should say like I'm completely speechless???? the chapter was so so so so so amazing??? I mean it's not like I didn't expect it to be good BUT HOLY SHIT THAT WAS SO SO SO SOOOO WOW 😭
And it's like, on the one hand, I don't want this fic to end because it's just so good you know? and I wouldn't have anything to look forward to anymore 😞 but on the other hand.......
I'm also kinda excited for when it ends, becauseeee that means that I can start printing it out and make a hardcover book out of it. yay😁😁
I'm genuinely so in love with this fic, your writing, them, literally everything is just so perfect IT HURTS !!!!!!!!
and I can say one thing for sure, I don't think I have ever been THIS invested in a fanfic. I regularly check tumblr to see if you posted anything new and when you do I get all excited and even tell my friends about it LMAO
I woke up today at like 7 because I was so excited for chapter 14 and couldn't fall asleep anymore.
So, bottom line, I really appreciate you and what you do and you somehow always manage to make my weeks better!!
(it's actually so crazy that a fanfiction about two people being friends with benefits makes me feel that many emotions, but thank you i guess??)
oh my god i dont even know how to reply to this i---
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you want to print it out and keep it as a book???!?? 😭😭💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 oh my god?!??!?! 🥺🥹💖💖💖💖 that is so--- i dont even know what to say to that 😭💖💖😭😭😭😭😭
im so SO glad you enjoy this fic so much holy shit, this just made my entire month 🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖💖
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greyfacade · 1 month
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Ask game questions! 5, 7, 8, and 23 for spamton bc I'm legally obligated to ask about him. You don't have to do all of them tho if you don't want!
5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?
I'm Gonna Win - Rob Cantor
First song I thought of, though I'm sure there are other more suitable songs I could come up with. But honestly, due to my illness I don't get to listen to music often. I'm sensitive to sound.
7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?
There's been some really nice fanart, and I love the fake ad ones people make, and the pinups. I love buying merch from people.
Its also nice when people treat their plushes nicely, or actually see him as more than just the "funny salesman." Don't get me wrong, Spamton's is an awesome a salesman and all, but that's not all he is.
Oh, my fave part though, is how everyone celebrates his fan birthday. Thats super sweet. I love seeing people make fanart for that.
23. Favorite picture of this character?
Hm.. there's lot of great fanart of him, and you can see what I post already.
But I guess his shop sprite. It's fun to talk to him.
I do wonder what he would be like in person though.
8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?
Haha... heh.... well, this will get long... (Sorry.)
Mostly just the fact that the fandom is made up of a LOT of hateful people, who hatepost about Spamton because he's "popular," or because their fans of Swatch/Queen/Addisons and are in denial about what those guys did to him so they try to pin it on Spamton by saying "he deserved it" or saying it never happened.
Which is REALLY ironic in a way. But wait, we got more!
(_WARNING: RANT INCOMING!_ You dont have to read this.)
Many people can't get past the "funny salesman" trope. They think the salesman pitch Spamton puts on is literally all he is, that he really is this guy who is silly, obsessed with money, and batshit crazy. Does no one know how entertainment works!? Has no one ever followed a YouTuber or Twitch streamer, or gone to the circus or seen a live show? That how people act in front of a camera, isnt how they act all the time!? Spamton doesn't actually care about money, he said it himself; he does all he does because he's an entertainer trying to survive! The Spamton Sweepstakes, the Fangamer ads, the Twitter replies... while they contain truths and genuine things about him, for much of it, he's playing everyone like fiddles! He's saying whatever the hell he can to make you buy his shit, because funny thing, its his job! And the things is, it WORKS. Everyone totally buys in to it! But while I'm sure he does find joy in what he does, it can also be kind of painful that everyone actually thinks that's all he is in a way... they infantilize him, they treat him like he's crazy/stupid, they stereotype him, they make fun of him, they talk about wanting to hurt him... and they think its okay, because "he's in on the joke." Yeah? You really think anyone would find joy in seeing you make art of them getting abused/hurt/killed? REALLY? Ever thought that maybe... its not actually okay....
I guess I feel bothered by it. Sure Spamton chooses to play up all the stereotypes about him so that people will buy his stuff, and its cool that he can still joke about things like that. But... I wish people saw more of the real him sometimes, and realized he deserves kindness and respect like anyone else.
But I think Spamton is a good example of how people go too far, how they'll greedily take everything from someone, even their dignity, if it means feeding their own happiness. How they can't separate entertainment from reality (... yeah yeah, some irony there as I'm talking about a fictional character...)
In a way, the Spamton fandom, often represents to me, much of the things I hate about the entertainment industry, hell even fandom. I'm glad people love him and buy his stuff, but I also wish they liked him for kinder reasons. I hope that if he continues to be in entertainment, he gets to make something he loves, that allows him to be who he wants to be. Because like many of us, he sometimes gets trapped in a role, determined by other people. And while some of it is true, like he is funny and has a dark sense of humor, and I'm sure he does enjoy many of the things he does... but some of it, I think is sort of forced on him. It's like if you don't act the way everyone wants, they'll get angry or abandon you. And that, thats awful.
(And Im not saying don't enjoy his salesman persona, just that, I wish people saw the rest of him too. Because he's a kind, caring and brave guy, and I really wish him the best ya know?)
.... of course, I admit this might be some of my own self-projection too, but lets not unpack THAT.
...
......
You made it this far, wow... uh... *gives you a gold star saying "I just wasted several minutes of my life to an insane fan rant." except all the words don't fit on the star, so it just says "I just wasted."*
... *runs away while you ponder the star*
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ninthprime · 7 months
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post where i just talk about what im palisade shipping. because im bored.
bucci real. i like to think about how gucci ended up in this deep. how lonely are you that the fish who you know used to scam you and did war crimes is the one you’re falling in love with!! why are you having romantic thoughts about being great heroes and saving everyone with them!! brnine likes gucci of course but i truly don’t think they realized how deep it was until that pre-sun convo. and its like oh gucci is in deep with me. well i’m not gonna process that in my brain because i can’t connect to my own emotions. it’s toxic they’re not good for each other but its ok. care for each other anyway.
brnine/jesset is real too you know it is. but i also think that’s jesset occasionally wanting to make out with them and brnine would probably agree but is not processing it and is just thinking Jesset’s my best friend! ok brnine.
this does mean gucci/brnine/jesset is real i think. bucesset. as it has been dubbed. usually i dont think its romantic with gucci and jesset but it’s. A Relationship. what if we mind melded once and hated each other and what if we were currently each other’s ally on the terrorism council nonetheless and what if we were both in love with a pathetic war criminal. i want them to freak out about brnine being on the pact ship together. i want them to both be a little fucked up about how they nearly just had to give themselves up to the bilats. i want jesset to make gucci promise to not fail brnine like they both did valence.
you all know gurbalence is the forever ot3…for years i have thought of them every day…you know we will get it. ali is already providing us a steady stream of balence. and you KNOW we will get gurlence. you know dre and austin will make that happen. you know gur and brnine are going to have to exist around each other via figure proxy. and it will be awkward and bad. but they are associated forever by grief :) do you think brnine has opinions on the gur puppet. hey if they try to free gur do you think someone will have to make him another body. hey do you think brnine has thought about how they have the notes and tapes that are valence and gur’s legacy recently
i think figure/gur (figur) (you know we have to call it figur) could be real but i need to see it. i KNOW how much a dre pc loves a npc romance. but it could also be so bad for them in the wrong circumstances…them being tied together ties them to clem in many ways still…they have such similar hurts. it is probably not great to finally gain freedom and then have a spider bound to you. but also i think they could understand each other. figure will definitely project on them a little as is their habit. i have to see the flirty quotient…well sometimes gur is just naturally like that.
i did mention this recently in replies but secretly though the figure ship i have been thinking about a lot this season is figure/thisbe. honestly it may be my largest ship this season. but i have been nervous to talk about it because the best thing about thisbe is that she does not see things the way others see them so it is a hard sell while still true to her character. but im not seeing things right. they like to rush into action together. figure wanted to know if she was being treated well and seems to have picked up on how she sees the world differently and will defer to her judgement. thisbe made a clock just for getting them away from clem and prioritized it for multiple missions. they are like a plant to her and now they have plants growing from them!! i think figure will be very grateful and may try to make it up to her and it will be cute and funny. this is thisbe’s weird little crewmate and she is going to hook them up to the blue channel irrigation system and provide them beneficial nutrients. this will be satisfying to her and they will feel very safe.
cori/elle real. they will kiss i think. what i need to see is for them to talk about devotion more. what made you realize you didn’t believe elle. what happened to you as a double agent. can what you know cut through cori’s pain. can it cut through her devotion. how can you share this with her without her punching you again. do you care enough about her to share this. i want to see it all on screen
my friends are much better than me than talking about arbitred the hot new ship but it’s real. sending someone a digital ham slurper is real. when you don’t have a candidate because that’s so demeaning but you work closely with a weird little cyborg girl that’s not romance you know that’s just putting someone under a microscope and thinking they’re entertaining. it’s not like you feel the nonhuman equivalent of a satisfied rush when she sends you an emoji and talks about how successful the two of you are at selling contracts together. simply an incredibly beneficial business transaction. you are sending her five more ham slurpers and watching her say npc dialogue about this.
this isnt a big ship yet but i want to see more of the crusade squad because i miss ignadiah and ramondre the swordbearer rivals. i think hets are allowed if they are constantly trying to destroy one another. they are so much fun to me.
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nerves-nebula · 3 months
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Sorry bout this thing but I kinda wanted to tell my thoughts about your stuff. Im kind of hoping this will get drowned in your inbox honestly, since this is just a really long unsolicited rant of mine.
Sometimes when i scroll through your account and I encounter csa, incest and mentions of suicide in your posts I get uncomfortable but then I remember that one phrase that goes something like "Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comforted" and I just feel kinda bad bout myself.
When I was a kid my nannys bf forced me to kiss him in the lips whenever we met. I was 6. It was uncomfortable. I never did tell my nanny about it. My parents are both police people and my mother had long explained the concept of rape and how unconsensual touch is bad and you shouldnt allow that but something prevented me from telling anyone what was happening. I dont know why. I know they would immiedietly jail that guy if they did but somehow it felt like no one would believe me. I never told them until now, then when I was what, 6-8 years old? I cant even remember. Yeah somewhere around that, he molested me when my nanny was few feet away and asleep and for the next 4 years of my life i felt dirty. Desecrated. Stupid. I couldnt even look down at my naked body when i shower back then, but somehow I managed to trudge on living by trying to forget the fact it happened. Its been 8 years since Ive last seen him. Ive told anyone who I knew who doesnt care enough to be friends with me but cared enough to listen about it but my Parents are none the wiser and i plan on keeping it that way.
Also. Im a year away from being legal now. Ive thought about killing myself or just generally not wanting to exist anymore many times since then, cuz lifes equipped with motolov cocktails of "get fucked dumbass" and i somehow managed to get a coupon for at least a million of them.
(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).
Coming back to the phrase i mentioned earlier, it feels weird whenever i feel something similar to the feeling of being triggered while looking at csa being depicted. By definition, i would be considered a victim, and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont. I see your art and it guts me. It guts me and the fact that it does also guts me, because what does that mean? I am supposed to be the comforted? Despite the fact that I was taken advantage of as a child and spent night after might thinking how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equiped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children? So i do I correspond more with those who are defined as comforted then, was i not disturbed after all? Was i victimizing myself all along? Am I a bad person for thinking i was? No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?
And then it repeats.
I still go through your blog because well, i love tmnt, i love your artstyle, i love the way you tell stories, I love how you dont sugar coat csa, incest and other darker topics like body horror, erotism and sadism, i hate how much it haunts me, i love the fact i can relate, i hate how much you hurt them, i love the fact that you dont hold back, i love how you show the ugly sides of healing, i love how you depict how much people can change and struggle. Its comforting to me. Its discomforting to me. I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.
And i like it. I like it somehow, like taking a nice smoke break when you have mild asthma, but like, better. Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.
But yeah. Tldr. Sorry for the trauma dump and your art makes me feel complicated. Its neat 👍
lot to reply to here! also, unfortunately for you, i check my inbox obsessively and dont get nearly as many asks as you seem to believe i do.
so firstly, no snappy saying is meant to encompass all of human experience, and you certainly shouldn't judge yourself for not fitting into it. easier said than done, i know, but still. i'm gonna try to address some things here, not gonna touch on all of it, but just know that i appreciate you sitting down to write me this.
(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).
it made me smile, but i laughed at this, because it's a very sweet look into you writing this. puts into perspective how, even though this is public, it was written TO me. like a letter in victorian times or something. that's sweet, i like that.
and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont.
you're making a lot of assumptions here that are kind of wild in that "this thought process was clearly designed by your mind to upset you specifically" sort of way. I mean, would you say this to literally anyone else when they feel uncomfortable or triggered about viewing media that relates to their trauma? There's really no telling what a survivor will feel comforted by and you aren't Doing It Wrong by having a different reaction.
there's a reason i tag it as "csa tw" and that's so people can AVOID it as well as search it up.
how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equipped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children?
i know you recognize at the end of the thought process that this is not true, but i feel the need to reiterate: there is no such thing as being less vulnerable than other children through your own actions. you can try to equip kids with knowledge that might protect them, but that doesn't make them any less vulnerable.
my dad told me about rape and molestation all the time, but he never accounted for the kinds of scenarios i was actually the most likely to fall victim to, partly because i don't think he actually knew much about childhood sexual abuse, and partly because he was more obsessed with the idea of me being kidnapped and raped/murdered than he was about forms of sexual abuse he'd consider more "mild"
No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?
i can't answer that one, unfortunately. personally, i like to feel gutted, it's cathartic to me. might be something like that to you, based on how you go on to describe it, but you might also be doing some kinda self harm.
I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.
saaaaame. i triggered myself into a breakdown in class once cuz i'd been reading fucked fanfiction before class and i got SAD lol.
Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.
we are shaking hands over this.
anywho, no need to apologize! i am glad, if nothing else, to provide you with a strange and upsetting experience that is not entirely bad.
I really do adore hearing how my stuff makes people feel. it's like, a solid one third of the reason i do this. i still make stuff that doesn't exist to be shown off but WOW showing shit off and getting a response feels FANTASTIC. like, i'm in your head now!! you have been CHANGED by my ART. it's maybe the best part of being alive.
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devondespresso · 5 months
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
tagged by @museumgiftshoperaser
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
technically 2, but its a sfw and nsfw version of the same fic fhajklfjdalfjk
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
...6,357. i promise i write.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
just stranger things so far, but i have seriously thought about writing about Fender's gender from Robots (2005) and I promised my friend a Shark Tale fic for their birthday fjalhfdjkalfdj
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Never Again
Never Again (sfw)
fascinating statistics arent they
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
never gotten comments on ao3, i do reply to what i get on tumblr tho because it literally makes my day
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
(including my unposted work) Never Again, tho i think its more bittersweet than unrelenting angst
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
tho its technically not finished, We'll Be Alright (Steve Henderson AU) has a very happy ending
8. Do you get hate on fics?
no, thank god
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
im gonna say no? despite writing something spicy at the beginning of Never Again it was not a good time (for me or Nancy)
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
haven't yet, and while i wont write them off entirely itd have to have really strong potential for me to want to do it
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
nope
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
no
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
no, and i dont know how well id go. on the one hand im usually good at group stuff but im also an annoying perfectionist with my writing
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
platonically stobin 100%. i dont get nearly as attatched to the romantic ones so i kinda just bounce around the fandom. Really love a lot of the steve harrington rairpairs floating around, plus robin and vickie
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
I dont realllly have a writing wip i know i wont finish cause i've just been posting those vague ideas instead of actually writing them becuase i know i wont. My only active wip is the steve henderson au and im hoping praying to god that i dont suddenly loose passion for it
16. What are your writing strengths?
dialogue probably, coming up with how different characters are saying things, what theyre saying, what they mean, all the little differences in their voices, I love it. that and having characters interact with the environment
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
overthinking and underthinking, stopping myself from making something happen or a character do something because theres this pull in my chest telling me its wrong. even just standard selfishness or saying something without the express intent of making sure it wont hurt someones feelings. i also start sentences with verbs djaldjdjaf
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
makes sense if characters are speaking multiple languages i guess. depends on pov and how limited it is to the pov character. like if the pov character doesnt speak spanish it'd be better to write "and they said something in spanish they didnt understand" instead of writing the spanish out assuming the audience doesnt know it either
19. First fandom you wrote for?
stranger things
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
definitely my steve henderson au. i wish it was shared already but at the same time i've editied and changed so much im glad i havnt officially yet. its helped me work through a lot and has even caused noticable improvement in my relationship with my family even if they dont know it exists. i cant promise itll be fully posted soon, but i am so exited for when i do
tagging @stobinesque @marvel-ous-m @eriquin @itsthestrangestthings @findafight @fag4dykestobin (no pressure ofc 💕)
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jung-koook · 2 years
Text
let me talk about something here please.
every time I open my inbox I saw hates messages. I prefer to block these messages, ignore them completely but this time I think I need to reply to these ones that left me extremely offended.
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stealing from twitter??? what?? whenever I go on twitter and see a photo or video and post it here I always put the credits. I also check their twitter account to see if there are any messages from them asking us to not repost their videos and photos. and after so many controversies and fansites wrong behaviors, i also stopped supporting fansite fantakes. when I go on twitter to look for translations for my gifs I always put the credits in the description of them. when I post only the translation I take a screenshot of their account and post it showing their username. I also use twitter for news and I always post a screenshot showing where the new came from. and I use twitter to see other instagrams uploading members photos, but do i need to put credits where i got these photos? please, I didnt steal anything from anyone!
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now this one.. gosh :/ being called a sasaeng is so offensive, I’m really shook right now :/ let me reply to this message :////
first of all, I am a 24 year old adult, thank you. “has major saesang behavior”??? what do you mean by that?? if you call me something like that you have to give me proof of what you're talking about! I never posted anything from their private events and schedules. nor pics of them just enjoying their lives. i document every moment of jeongguks life?? I cant understand what you're talking about because i dont to that. I never posted anything private about his life!
i already posted some pics of jeongguk that his brother posted on his instagram and his brother talking about gureum. his brother always interacted with army on instagram. he already posted some pics of jeongguk and some bangtan fanarts on his instagram. his brother never told armys not to interact with his account. but after some people asked me not to post these photos/pics here anymore, i deleted them.  (i dont see anything wrong with posting these since his brother doesnt see a problem with it. different from hobis sister who already said she doesnt like her instagram posts beind shared. )
when jeongguk was to film the ‘left and right’ mv. I saw a translation account translate to where he was going. I had read the kmedia news but I didnt realize that the two accounts were talking about different places. so I completely wrongly shared what the translation account translated but that account translated the place bighit was trying to keep private. a nice person here saw it and came to warn me about it and after that i deleted my post and apologize for sharing that here. I think unfortunately these are mistakes that anyone can make. but that doesnt make them saesang. please search on saesang term first.
if i cared about ony notes i wouldnt make gifs anymore. I make gifs because its a hobby that helps me to relax, to forget about the things that are bothering me in my personal life, to show a little bit of my love and admiration for bangtan by making my gifs. but notes are something important and caring about notes is nothing wrong! everyone wants to have their work recognized in some way right? and here its through the notes. so yes, I will self-reblog my posts whenever I want, thanks. :) 
I dont know why but there seem to be a lot of people who dont like that I've been here since 2013 lol and they think I dont deserve the support I got since the start of my blog. been here since the beginning helped me a lot and its something important for me. please dont try to take that out of my story. my blog is a beautiful part of my history as a bangtan fan. please dont try to hurt this part of my story. I went on hiatus for a while because I'm studying architecture and I had to focus only on my studies :)) when i came back tumblr was completely different. the people I knew from before werent here. even though i still had a lot of followers i felt like most werent here anymore either. so for me it was like starting my blog all over again. most of the people who support my blog here dont know it from the beginning, most are new people. so the reason I have support here is not because I've been here since 2013. the only ugliness I see here is you and your messages. you tried to ruin my day and you succeeded. :)
I'm tired of people trying to make things up about me! leave me alone! I'm not hurting anyone. I just post my gifs, support the work of other talented people here and scream for bangtan. stop trying to make up extremely dangerous lies about me! if you dont like me and my blog, stop being pathetic please do something for yourself. blocked my blog so you will never see me here again.
P.S. I’m sorry for my bad english but i needed to answer these messages. and I answered that way because I needed to block these people or the same person from my blog.
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terraliensvent · 9 days
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hey! owner of the species here. (https://www.tumblr.com/terraliensvent/748247327120277504/i-think-theres-a-whole-issue-with-cs-as-a-whole-i?source=share)
i only rehired the devs becaus half of then were not doing anything at all, and the other half were not being very nice to those who werent doing much! also, one dev was making me extremely uncomfortable. I understand how this could come off this way!! but tbh i made this species as a personal project because of terras shutting down, and it kind of hurts to say its going to turn out like the hellhole that is.
Terras is very complicated in terms of drama right now and i feel as though comparing a species that is just starting out and maybe not the greatest to another one that has repetitively made wrongs, angered many members, etc. is a little unfair!
im super sorry if I am rude in any of this, i am trying not to be petty or mean or anything, i am just a little upset that you thought of it this way! its okay though.
i also probably am going to leave terras just because of how it is right now, i was considering just making my species a one off and moving on but I really like ARPG things, and was planning for mostly a non-monetary spending community, and kindness.
sorry this isnt super terra related anon, if its not terra-y enough feel free to ignore!
post related
im gonna be fr anon, you did not need to defend ur species. it wasnt even named so if anything my post wouldnt have really gotten you any negative press
they also sent this ask:
"same anon who replied to this i dunno if its about me but if it is not then sorry if i!!! was like rude or something im very stressed rn"
i think you may be overthinking a little with this one, try to mellow out a bit. i dont think u come off as rude but maybe a bit panicked, maybe rethink if youre ready to handle a responsibility like this? not everyone is right for handling large communities and thats ok
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ectology · 10 months
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I have a genuine question, why didn’t you just message the artist from the beginning? Like I understand where your comment came from but I feel like fandom is supposed to be fun and if you genuinely felt a micro aggression from their art you could’ve educated them. The reason people are hating is because of how you personally handled the situation from doubling down to not taking peoples criticisms seriously. I think if you weren’t interested in talking to the artist why bother posting the art? Maybe make a text post to gripe instead of including the actual art. You’re blog is your own and you have a right to your opinion on your own blog and yes their art was cringe (although v cute style!) BUT it’s better to be cringe than mean. And I say this as a follower of your art and not a hater but some of the twitter replies you left were mean and unnecessary. I think that you got dog piled enough and don’t deserve all this negative attention but I think that people are struggling to see your remorse in the situation because you keep replying and restating your og opinions. Anyways I hope this dies out for both you and the other artist, seeing all this hate can’t be good for y’all’s mental health.
i didn't message the artist from the beginning because my comment wasn't a callout post. there was nothing wrong with the art, it wasn't a microaggression or problematic or whatever. i said a pretty mild thing about their art on my own twitter specifically so the artist WOULDN'T see it because it wasnt constructive criticism, it was literally just me noting that i didn't like something. going to the artist and being like "HEY I DON'T LIKE THIS THING" would have been pretty stupid and pointless, which is why i made a separate post. but fsr this was taken as condemnation of the art/artist or me calling them evil or something?? i dont get why my opinion on it even mattered or why that shit blew up the way it did
and no im not remorseful about what i said, i didnt say anything wrong. my regret is that by posting publicly and having that many people share it, my post got around to the artist as well which i definitely didn't intend. ive since deleted the tweet and spoken to them to apologize and clear up any hard feelings. so yeah lesson learned, if i ever have a thought about anything i should just shut the fuck up or talk about it privately. but for real ....like........... it is Not that serious. i didn't say anything particularly mean or hurtful. there are a ton of ppl who directly messaged and qrt'd the art saying way worse shit than i did so idk why im the one who got dogpiled like that lmao.
i think if i actually said something insulting or genuinely rude id be happy to apologize for it or wouldnt have said it in the first place. but yeah no shit i was being mean to the hundreds of people severely overreacting in my replies lol. i dont think i really owe anyone an explanation either other than the og artist, since they're the one actually affected by the situation, and i've already done that. so im moving on. this is a non-issue
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lightlycareless · 3 months
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hihi!! this is my first time writing an ask to anyone on tumblr you dont need to make a reply to this because this is just things i want to say to you theres this song called mascara by deftones that i came across on tiktok, and theres this one part that goes "you're married... to me." right before the beat drops and the way i literally GASPED because it reminded me of your fic and naoya and y/ns marriage 😭pls give it a listen if you have the time! its good i swear also even though im sure youve received a lot of compliments before, i just want to... genuinely thank you for just existing. youre such a wonderful person, in every one of your posts and replies youre so nice and understanding, and youre the most dedicated writer ive ever seen online. youve really made me so so happy with your writing and fic, and i just want you to know how amazing you are. thank you thank you thank you! i dont even realize when but my life went from "just got to make it to friday" to "just got to make it to the next first it hurts update" LOL anyway i hope everything in life goes well for you. once again, thank you. know that there are always people out there that appreciate you and love you!
Hello!!!
First of all, thank you so much for your lovely words!! Like I still can't believe that after so many chapters after starting my story, I'd be getting the support I've had 😭❤️ and you,,,, ghjagjhagjhagka you saying those wonderful things about me just make it even harder to believe!
🥺 I'm a bit teary eyed, ngl... your words really moved me. 😭 thank you so much.
I'm really happy that my work is something you have been enjoying up until now, and while it might take me a while to get back to each reply/ask, I never forget about them and I appreciate them so so much—it's the least I could do after all this wonderful support! I will do my best to continue with my writing so you can keep enjoying it 😭❤️!!!!!! Hopefully the new chapter will be uploaded soon too 🤭 I also get excited when the update day is near hehe. ahhh!!!
Now, onto your song...
Omg… I listened to it and I immediately went to search for it’s meaning/interpretation because I was wow—if you think about it it’s really dark you know?
But going back to what it made me think about Naoya and Y/N—there's no denying it, the song covers the fact they're forced to be together. (or more like Naoya is forcing her, but he doesn't want to let go either, so...)
Highlighting the fact that no matter what the other does, or much they try to get away or act like it isn't happening, it's all for nothing because the papers are signed and they're officially bound to one another😭
That's not the only thing I got from the song though 👀
I also got the idea that it was kind of Naoya mockingly telling Y/N that she can continue fighting him, denying him, and so on... but it’s too bad because “you're [still] married to me.” jfc.
Or also, it could be referring to her longing for Naoaki and how Naoya is a hindrance to that. Damn. Bless you for sharing this song with me, it really gets the angst inspiration going on. And fortunately for us, there's still more to come in the main fic mwaahahahahahahha
Anyways 😏 thank you so much for sending in this lovely ask!! I went back to it here and there whenever I felt particularly down about my skills, or in general, so you don't know how much this meant for me 🥺❤️ I wish I could assertively express how much I appreciate you, your support, and your words 😭❤️ but I hope a thank you will be able to convey such sentiments.
Have a wonderful day, take care of yourself, and hope to see you soon ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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