#did they abandon me forever because they hate me now???? did I annoy them? am I sending TOO many texts to check in or | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

patheticpaprika · 1 year

Text

Just found this completely written in my drafts from January cause I got incredibly annoyed at it and abandoned it, but feck it posting it anyways, why not. So you know how in wwdits when the credits hit in the cult episode (s3 ep8) this song comes on to punch you in the gut after everything you've just watched?

"Have you ever considered for one moment that I might be happy for the first time in decades?! DECADES!"

Nandor hates being a vampire. He sees it as constant sameness that weighs down on him and washes away any purpose or belonging. But Guillermo brings him back. To him, vampirism is nothing but a gift and a reason for respect.

Now imagine a future episode, after Guillermo has been turned by Dereck. He's returned to the house and refuses to play the familiar anymore. He refuses to be their inferior. He's determined to change the sameness. Yet Nandor is too busy being upset that he wasn't the one to turn him and fully expecting him to finally leave for good causing him to be extra prickly and dismissive. The others just treat him like he was still human. How can anything truly change if they refuse to acknowledge anything has?

"Nothing ever changes in this house. Nothing is ever going to change. Unless I change it."

He had already become stronger than them. He had already demanded respect before. He had grown confidence and strength in himself. He'd done this all before. Vampirism solved nothing because he wasn't the one that refused to change.

He'll never be enough for Nandor, will he? He was never inadequate, Guillermo had long since grown past that. He just had always believed he was.

He is finally done. He says his goodbyes and leaves to be his very cool vampirey self without them. He's left, and this time he has no reason to come back. Nandor believes Guillermo only stayed to be turned into a vampire. Nandor's worst fears have finally been "confirmed," although only caused by his own manifestation.

Guillermo was his catalyst. Without him, the sameness of forever bores down on him. Guillermo makes him happy. For so long he'd been searching for someone that would make him like eternity but he'd been there all along. Yet all he had been doing was expecting he'd leave. He craves change but is terrified of its uncertainty. He desperately seeks closeness but is too scared to believe he can ever have it. No one could ever see him in his entirety and ever want to stay. This was simply further proof. He loved and was loved back but he refused to accept the possibility and hid behind his wall of indifference.

Mr. Emotional-Inteligence-of-A-Brick finally does a little self-reflection and realizes he needs Guillermo there. He makes him happy. He tries to get Guillermo to come back, but it's too little too late.

"Have you ever considered my happiness, Nandor?! You say you need me there and then act like you don't care about me. I'm done being not enough for you. I'm far better than that." "I am sorry Guillermo... I did not realize I made you so unhappy." "Yes because you never realize! Why do you even try to act like you care?" "I do care!" "Oh you do? Then tell me why." "...I" "Goodbye Nandor."

Yet with all his sulking and frustrated (not to mention terrible) attempts from his housemates to talk to him and cheer him up, Mr. Emotional-Inteligence-of-A-Brick finally does some reflection. He finally asks himself (maybe with some prompting from someone else) why Guillermo leaving was his worst fear in the first place. Why does he even care? Cue:

B-roll footage of Nandor drifting around the house before cutting back to him just standing there staring at the floor with a 1000 micro-expressions fliting on his face. But before the chorus kicks in. The music stops just long enough for Nandor to look up to the camera, absolutely terrified. (He cares for him. He needs him. He loves him. But it's too late, isn't it?) The credits hit and the song continues. So, when you're near me, darling, can't you hear me? S.O.S The love you gave me, nothing else can save me, S.O.S

#should I be making a fanfic for this lol #parallels my beloved #bonus points if it was episode 8 #although it'd be far too good of a season finale cliffhanger #wwdits #nandermo #wwdits s4 spoilers #wwdits speculation #although more like wishful thinking lol #Spotify #paprika's pantry of posts

42 notes · View notes

yjh-titty-belt-licker · 6 months

Note

it’s me. a hate anon. i’m being incredibly annoying about my take on fictional characters.

anyways who is a*am or whatever i want all the tea

lol oh buddy you have no idea. its been so many years of bullshit and, granted, its been a while since ive been in the trenches, but i have ALL the tea to spill. okay, so,

Sk8 the Infinity was a shounen sports anime that aired in early 2021, January to April. It followed the protagonist Reki Kyan, a 3rd-year in high school who was a skater. But this isn't just an anime about skateboarding. The grand majority of the skating took place at "S", an illegal skating course in an abandoned mine. The important races are "beefs", and there are no rules to beefs; you can injure your opponent in any way, and there's no consequences.

Some other relevant characters are: Langa Hasegawa, nicknamed SNOW, the deuteragonist; Ainosuke Shindo, ADAM, the antagonist; Tadashi Kikuchi, supporting character. Not sure whether to place him as an antagonist or protag, he kinda straddles the line.

The thing about ADAM is that he's the subversion of an all-too well known anime trope: Pedophile villain. See, while he does not in fact have those feelings towards minors in the show, he. Is very complicated. He has a whole thing where he thinks love is a good thing but also pain, because his aunts beat him and said it was because they love him and he believed them. He's also still grappling with the trauma of being "betrayed" by his childhood friend, Tadashi.

He's trying to find the EVE to his ADAM, because he hurts from being betrayed by the person he cares for most, but in reality, what he really wants is Tadashi back. But he's confused, and thinks that wanting to hurt someone means loving them. So he doesn't know what love feels like. If he thinks he "loves" himself, he hates himself and wants to hurt himself. Which. He kinda does try to kill himself sort of in the finale. It's a whole thing.

(Notice how I put "betrayed" in quotes. If you read scum villain, its a similar situation as with QiJiu. One party wanted to protect the other and failed, so they stay silent and do all they can for that person out of guilt. The other thinks the other really did betray them, and is hurt that that person is so much colder now, that the other person doesnt love them anymore.)

So, anyways. Adam is confused about what love is, and his arc in the first season was learning to not "love" people the way he does, and to accept care, even if he doesn't know it's love. When he reconciled with Tadashi in the final episode, he said "You'll be my dog for the rest of our lives", and I and everyone else in the Tadaai fandom understood he said that because 1. kinky fuckers lol 2. more relevantly, saying he loves Tadashi would be a red flag, because his definition of love is completely warped. Regardless of how he said it, the "be mine forever" was the important part. And Tadashi understood.

But most of what I'm referencing happened in the later episodes. Like I said, he was a subversion, which means that first he had to be slotted into the role before undoing it. Now I bring up The Langa Thing.

Langa was half-Canadian, and grew up in Canada. But when his father died, his mother took him back to Japan so she would have family around her in her grief. He ended up in Reki's class, and the two quickly became friends.

Reki taught Langa how to skate, but because Langa snowboarded since he was 2, he picked it up rather quickly, and even showed extreme talent. This extreme talent caught the eye of most of the skaters at S, and he earned the moniker "Snow". It also made the founder of S notice him. And that founder is Ainosuke Shindo, Adam.

Remember how I said he's trying to find his EVE? He thinks he wants an equal in skating, his only escape from his suffocating life, but he really wants Tadashi back. But he sees this genius in skating, and really is excited to skate with someone new. But he doesn't recognize it for just that, he thinks he found his "Eve". There's plenty of things he does, calling Langa "Langa-kun", being very excited to skate with Langa, giving him a bouquet of roses at one point (though one would argue that it's perfectly in line with his dramatics, hes essentially a drag king whose show is skateboarding).

All in all, there's a lot of suggestions he's attracted to Langa, but later episodes disprove that. There were other sketchy things (him saying to a middle schooler "I'll love you when you're older", but this was in reference to skateboarding, and by his definition of love, he means "yea you're too young for me to beat the crap out of you kid". Which is a perfectly normal sentiment, he just has an extremely weird way of saying it.) But... here's the thing.

There were weekly episodes.

Meaning: People pegged him as a "pedophile anime villain" type for months before his true nature was revealed. And when that evidence showed, people weren't inclined to believe it. People also thought he was Tadashi's abuser before the true nature of their relationship was revealed.

So, Adam isn't a pedophile. His relationship with Tadashi is rough, but Tadashi has full autonomy and chooses to be a part of it, and they're getting better. Adam is weird, sure, but he has reason to be that way. But the fandom lacks reading comprehension and hates to be proven wrong. So, people still think of him as a pedophilic abuser.

And like. I harken from ye olden days of Black Butler, okay. I'm not exactly put off by edenshippers (adam x langa). But for gods sake the show disproved it. Why are y'all acting like this.

So. Being known as an Adam fan is a one-way ticket to getting a bunch of harassment. Was back then, apparently still is now. I can't wait for season 2 to prove these assholes wrong.

sorry for the essay sprung on you bestie

#braincell posting #oh look an ask

13 notes · View notes

yourbestpalpercy · 7 months

Text

Meetup

What happened…? Sarah was in the office one second and then in a dark place the next. Sarah slowly felt around and felt the inside of the trash..tube?? Thingy she hid in when she saw wires start to swarm the office more and more.

…Where were her friends? Was that the light of the sun?

Sarah slowly look out the hole. It was small.. pushing out some of the rubble just barely revealed no sounds anywhere. No sound of anyone around. Not the construction crew, not that night guard…not even her friends…

Everything was quiet…the only sound was birds and-…was that a voice?

“This. Is. Just. GREAT!! My one chance to be someone’s best pal just had to have been THAT guy!” The voice dropped to clear sadness. “Now look at me!! Just right back where I started…” The voice didn’t sound natural in the slightest..! Sounded robotic or..bit-crushed like it was coming out of a dusty speaker on a kids toy. “No matter…! I’m sure someone DUMB enough will snoop around and then they’ll see..” The voice sounded excited at the thought. “THEY’LL SEE I CAN BE A GOOD PAL-!!” A laugh erupted from the voice. A laugh that sent sharp shudders down Sarah’s spine.

Oh god…

If this thing was here to help, should she just save herself? This person not only didn’t sound human but also sounded obsessive. She’d be in debt to this person forever if she let them save her.

So, she started pushing at the roof of the rubble as hard as she could. She could hear some tumble above her with a soft crash. The voice stopped, going completely silent. “…TamaTerrorz? You dummies still alive-?? How’d you get all the way over there?” Sarah stopped immediately.

Some rubble fell down causing a sharp squeak as she pulled away. The voice let out a soft growl. “You’re not the TamaTerrorz…” Wires suddenly seized her wrists. “…You’re warm..! Are you human?” The voice seemingly demanded. Sarah stayed quiet, trying her best to wiggle loose. “There’s no use in pretending you’re not there..just tell me who you are. I promise I won’t hurt you. You’re a new chance at friendship after all!” The voice became excited. Sarah gulped and struggled a little more. More wires wrapped around her. “…F-Fine..!” Sarah hissed.

“…The name’s Sarah.” The voice immediately paused. “…You sound young..! You’re not one of the guys who stopped me…who in the world are you? How did you even up buried??”

“Better question, who’re you? You tell me first and then I’ll talk,” Sarah crossed her arms despite the wires. Judging by the forced chuckle, the voice wasn’t happy about the sass. Regardless, he talked. “I’m a Pal Percy…^^!” The voice talked with forced cheer.

Sarah stopped. ‘Weren’t Pal Percys recalled-?? I-Is this why they were recalled-?! I-I can definitely see the dangers of wires but this is A LIVING TAMAGOTCHI—!!’ Sarah gulped and forced a nervous smile. “Y-You— are a Pal Percy?? L-Like the little tamagotchi..toys..?” Sarah said, the wires slowly let her go and reeled back, “Do not call me a ‘tamagotchi’, I feel insulted! I am more than a simple tamagotchi..!” The Pal Percy laughed. “..I-I can tell..” Sarah shook the last wire off.

“So!” The toy seemed excited to have someone to talk to, “What’re you doing in the rubble?” Sarah quickly spun the question onto Pal. “What’re you doing in the rubble? You’re a Pal Percy..! People adore tama- erm- Pal Percys..! I remember multiple kids having one. The bedroom was awful to sleep in to the point where the staff had to lock them up at night.” Pal sounded annoyed with his next sentence, “I thought that too-! But CLEARLY!! Some JERKS hate FUN!” Sarah could hear a thump from where the toy must’ve been. The toy sounded really frustrated. “He abandoned me because of one measly little game!” Oh boy here comes the rambling, “I-I was just trying to PLAY and HAVE FUN but he didn’t understand..! He just kept electrocuting me with my own creation—! Then by the 3rd charge- he gets angry AT ME FOR TRYING TO KILL HIM!!” Pal sounded like he was throwing a tantrum.

“Calm down, you belligerent dummy!!” Sarah hissed suddenly at him. Pal seemed impressed by this judging by his sudden silence. “My point was, someone oughta want you..!” Sarah wiped away a small tear with her next comment. “..people love pal percys…even if you were recalled. I’m sure someone will want you….” Sarah whispered softer, “they’d at least want you more than one of their own kind..”

“What was that final part?” Pal asked. “..Oh, nothing, nothing Pal.” The toy stopped before gently smiling. “Say, I saw some teens leaving earlier..those weren’t your friends..right~? Leaving you behind…?” Sarah stopped and held her chest. “N…No…” Sarah cracked.

“That struck a nerve! Have you been abandoned before this? Personally, it’s my first time! The rubble is very cold!” Pal said with a twisted laugh of sorts. “…For someone named ‘Pal’, you’re not very good at this friend thing.” Sarah soon heard a sharp growl come from Pal. Sarah let out a laugh. “‘That struck a nerve!’” Sarah mocked Pal Percy. “You’re smart for a kid,” Pal grumbled. “Kids are a lot smarter than one would expect.”

Sarah heard a car suddenly speed past the remains with a clear, sharp ‘VRRROOM!’. The sound clearly startled Pal judging by his yell of panic. “Wh-What in the world was that-?! Why was it so loud- so fast-?? N-None of my tamaterrorz could even DREAM of being that fast!!”

It took Sarah a moment to move away from his previous, mocking comment and response. “…Have you really never seen a car?” “..What’s a car..?” Pal sounded concerned. “Guess that confirms it. How have you never seen a car?” Pal sounded offended by the inquiry. “Sorry that I was inside that playhouse for my entire ‘life’!!” Pal hissed in response to Sarah.

“…Then again..! I haven’t seen a LOT of this stuff! Heh~! You’re gonna have to explain a lot to me!!”

“Oh joyous day…”

#playtime with percy #playtime with percy au #playtime with percy pal percy #pwpoc #playtimewithpercyoc #playtime with percy oc #pwp oc

8 notes · View notes

irishhorse-blog · 1 year

Text

I think they’re all leaving soon.

I hate this with every fiber of my being, but it’s their duty and they seem content with doing it. I’ll miss them, of course, but 18 months isn’t forever, and the sooner they go in, the sooner they’re out.

I’m worried and scared, because I selfishly don’t want to lose them, and I’m afraid that when they come out, they won’t be the same people who went in. I’m scared that they might not want to go back to making music as BTS. They keep saying they will, though, and they’ve asked us to trust them, and I’m trying to do so. My own anxieties and abandonment issues are playing up and being projected onto the situation, I know, which makes it stupid beyond words.

Let’s keep loving the boys while they serve. Let’s organize charity actions in their names, let’s stream BTS songs to the top of the charts to keep their name current and to annoy the rest of k-pop. Let’s stream and support all the solo work, enjoy the huge body of content we already have, and know that they’ve all probably done these video greetings that Jin recorded.

They’re going to be busy for a while. It’s okay. They’re not dying, they’re not dropping off the face of the earth. They’re serving their country and having experiences that will help them grow as men. This will be good for them. Also, there will be moments when they can use their phones, when they’ll have time off, and they might be able to occasionally send greetings or, as Joon said today, “proof of life.”

I know this is my own issue, and something I have to deal with. I’m just someone who never had anyone who ever really loved me, and with BTS, I thought that I’d found someone who did, even though they don’t really know I even exist. They’ve still done more to care about me as a person than 99.9% of the people I’ve ever known, and now that they’re going, it’s like the rug is being pulled out from under me. I’m afraid of falling into the dark again.

So please, if anyone is reading this, please forgive me for my fears and insecurities. Please forgive me for any doomsday posts I may end up making. I know that I’m being selfish, and that I’ve leaned too much on BTS. I guess this will be a chance for me to finally learn how to stand on my own without anyone supporting me. Maybe this time when they’re inaccessible and going through God knows what will be a time where I can grow as I go through God knows what as well.

I love BTS. I love all seven of the guys. I want them all to be happy and healthy and safe. I hope this time is good for them, that they have a good experience in the military, and that all my darkest fears turn out to be nothing. I’ll do what I can while they’re away: stream, listen to their music, watch their videos, love them from a distance (which is what I’m doing anyway, it’s not like anything is changing there).

I’m rambling. I don’t know if I’m even going to post this. I suppose I just needed to get some things said, and there’s nobody else I can talk to about this.

If anyone is reading this, please don’t slam me for being self-absorbed and selfish. I know I am. I know that. I’m just grappling with a long, ugly personal history that makes this hit harder than it should.

I love BTS. And 2025 can’t come soon enough.

#BTS #BTS military service #too much abuse makes you weak

17 notes · View notes

elderemorune · 1 month

Text

I'll See Ya When I See Ya

I've grown up, and I didn't even notice. It was such a gradual shift, from only caring about games, my friends, my girlfriend, and what cool new thing I was going to make next. I was trying a bunch of different forms of art to see what I could do, writing, painting, sculpting, none of it good, but I didn't care. I was a kid.

Before I even realized it, I was 30. Living in a house, trying to have kids, caring about politics despite promising I'd never care about them. I was so focused on growing, on becoming a better person, that I never stopped for a moment to consider what that meant, what parts of me I was leaving behind.

Then, despite my best efforts it was taken away from me. My sister and her husband needed room for their kids, and the state asked us very nicely if we'd consider leaving the house.

So we did, and here we are in Seattle, in a shitty apartment, doing shitty work while I put my wife through school, knowing that she's going to do amazing things when she graduates.

And other than her, only one goddamn person had the decency to thank me.

I guess this is growing up.

It's putting down your toys, not even knowing you'd never have time for them again. It's abandoning the carefree creativity of childhood and embracing a more structured approach to creation. It's your mom putting you down for the last time.

It's realizing your parents are humans too. It's understanding that one day, they'll be gone. It's considering how that will feel, thinking you're prepared, and of course, being wrong about that.

It's lamenting the fact that you're aging, that you're going to die.

It's worrying about taxes, what people think of you, and if you're going to make it to your next paycheck.

I miss being a kid. I mourn for my childhood, what could have been, what was. My heart breaks for the little boy sitting in his room and playing with his toys alone, scared of what will happen when his dad comes in and sees the mess. The little boy who didn't understand why nobody liked him. Whose peers found him annoying and pretentious when all he wanted to do was be friends with them. Who was hated by teachers and admin alike because he was 'too smart' but they couldn't figure out what to do with him, so they punished him.

All he ever wanted was to be loved. To be understood. It took a very long time to find the right people for that. I'm forever thankful to my wife and my best friends, because without them I would't be who I am now.

But it's so much more than that, too!

Growing up is also realizing that you're so much more than just a kid. Understanding that you have power, a voice, the ability to change things for the better. It's learning how to communicate with others, making new friends, reaching new heights!

Here I am, on the cusp of my next birthday, planning to go party for an evening because I've never done that. And that's growing up too. Experiencing new things just because, or making spontaneous plans. Meeting new people. Evolving as a human.

I don't know when I looked at my childhood self and said "See ya when I see ya", but I saw him today, and fuck did it hurt.

I guess this is growing up.

#blog #journal #childhood trauma #emotions #adulthood #blink 182 #i guess this is growing up #depressing shit

5 notes · View notes

katyspersonal · 8 months

Text

It just will forever baffle me how unfair he has been. He kept constantly blaming me for all that was going wrong in his life, he could get upset to the point of wanting to hurt himself or worse over things as little as me disagreeing with his creative ideas or not wanting to listen to something he wanted to share at the moment, he abandoned his friend he knew for two years because he got interested in me too much to give her enough - and then because he convinced himself she didn't care for him anymore.

And I knew, all along, that I was not right for him. I kept telling him to keep reaching out and seek friends that he'd actually like and actually get along with. I kept insisting that he was doing it to himself by clinging to me where clearly he hated me to the point I could've hurt him by as much as setting up boundaries, having different opinions or having limitations as a human being. I told him that that friend he abandoned still cared for him and he could not just decide FOR her. But over and over, he denied everything and begged me to stay, saying how much he wanted to have future together, how I was like a sister he lost a chance to have, how we were supposed to share life experiences together and how I was the only one that felt "real". I kept sticking around despite the abuse, despite how much he was ruining my mental health and my social life (being abused distances you from even close people), all because I could not stand seeing him so hurt and alone. And the last deceit hurt especially bad, because he made me truly believe him. He said something that made me lose my guard, my focus on the fact that I was just a placeholder in his life until he finds someone fitting.

And just like I kept saying, as soon as he got enough money for good life, his mental health improved upon switching meds or something, he met a new friend and reconnected with that exact one he abandoned earlier - he declared me a dead weight on his life that has only been "killing" him and declared that the almost two years he spent with me were just a bad dream he was happy to finally forget.

I knew all along that the best thing I could do for him was to leave him, but I never did. I should have before he stopped caring for me entirely out of blue, because now he didn't even learn anything. He lost nothing of value in his eyes, just a person that "wasted his time". So what if his current friends """fail""" him again? He'll just seek an outlet in new ones, until they prove "useless" and he'll ditch them too, and so on. Some people just can't appreciate someone's personality, they only value people for what they can give to them. Or.. is it just me? At times I am genuinely annoyed when people tell me I am a valuable person and anyone who can't love and appreciate me is an idiot, because on the contrary, in my life all people that despised me and saw me as a waste of their time the most were all high IQ, very well-read and educated, very sophisticated individuals. Clearly, there is a correlation between being very smart and deeming me as human garbage - in a way jealous haters, hypocritical control freaks and callous ableists I've met online never could.

Honestly, sometimes I should decide for someone else. I always knew he hated me and splitting with me was to the better for him, but I let his tears and clinginess force me to feel bad and go back every time. And to doubt that maybe I was the delusional one and could not be sure of someone else's needs. Honestly, guys - when you are given every single indication that you are hated and only kept around out of their fear of loneliness and low self-esteem... it is all there is. It is not a situation where you should listen to your heart, to hope or to give benefit of the doubt. Being abused is something you can only comprehend with mind and knowledge, there is no bigger story and no intricate matters.

Still, I hate how as painfully stupid and naive for my age as I am, I've been able to understand things way more correctly than a much older, much more mature person with high intellect and tons more of life experience. I was right all along, but I hate being right sometimes. And I hate always being discarded as soon as people's lives improve. I hate always being just a placeholder. Apparently, no one whose life is good would ever want to burden themselves with me.

#/vent #personal #I should have left while he'd still delude himself that I was someone important for him #maybe that way he'd take a good look at how he treats people and why he loses them #on the other hand maybe he won't mistreat anyone now that he has money and mental stability #honestly I am just cursed with some sort of cosmic injustice #every single person that harms and mistreats me walks away their merry way thriving and happy #i sticked with the bastard through his worst times and not just when he got stable and nice #yet all I got is accusation of 'wasting his time' and having been ruining his life and getting-#-forgotten like a bad dream #us in Russia believe that true friends are known in times of pain and advercity #that true friend is the one who stays with you through your WORST and not just when you're good #i guess westerners have different ideals. maybe rightfully so. he hated me all along after all.#I guess me wanting to stay with him and help no matter the cost did not matter for him since-#-that was coming from someone that wasn't his taste in people (platonically but still)#if I had someone who stayed with me despite abusing them due to poor mental health and-#-trauma I'd never ever ever just discarded them simply after getting my mental state fixed #I guess I was just a waste of his time because I still showed pain and anger in responce to abuse.#this summer was a mess #he and A that backstabbed me and my friends were the biggest self-esteem wounds on me in years

5 notes · View notes

artzee-bee · 3 years

Text

Not going anywhere | Lucifer Morningstar x reader

Fandom: Lucifer

Request:” Hi i have request for you ,Lucifer and the reader have a big fight they are married, and this fight it's lucifer fault The reader leaves home and Lucifer decides to give her space After a few days, he goes to the reader and realizes that she has been missing for a few days,When the person behind all this claims that the reader is dead and gives them a her body . Everyone thinks that the reader is dead and Lucifer He gets depressed and thinks it's all his fault , and after a few days, the thieves release the singer and the reader goes to Lucifer.Lucifer first thinks it is an imagination and then apologizes to the reader Thank you so much”

Genre: Angst with happy ending

Warnings: kidnapping, death

~~~

Your intention had never been to start a fight. All you wanted an explanation (preferably one that also made sense) and an apology, but apparently that was too much to ask, because as soon as you voiced your opinion, Lucifer went up in flames

“Don’t start this again!”

“I dislike it just as much as you do but what I hate more is being cancelled on, AGAIN, through a text message no less!”

“It was an emergency!”

“It’s always an emergency Lucifer! It’s starting to sound a lot like work means more to you than I do!” “The detective needs me, damn it!” your husband yelled

“And she has you! Every day of every week! All I ask for is one date night and for the past month you’ve done nothing but avoid committing to one or backing out at the last second! I’m tired of being your second choice Lucifer! I’m your wife and you are my husband, I love you to the ends of the world, I just wish you'd say no to Decker from time to time...”

“I’m saving people’s lives Y/N. So if you’re not on your deathbed, other people are and they need me now!” as he said this, Lucifer walked right past you and into your bedroom, seemingly ignorant to the painful words he’d just said. You looked around the living room, vision blurry with tears, your chest heavy with anger and disgust. You rushed towards the elevator.

“When you find time in your busy schedule and feel like being my spouse again, let me know!” the elevator door closed before Lucifer could say anything

~~~

When Lucifer woke up the next morning to a cold and empty bed, he didn’t think much of it.Truthfully, he was still kind of pissed at the attitude you had given him a day before, so he got dressed as usual and went to the precinct, assuming you’ll be home by nightfall.

Except when he got home that night, he stopped by Lux first, which ended up like it always does: with him sucked into an endless cycle of booze and dancing, that lasted until well into the night. When he did enter the penthouse eventually, he found it empty. Exactly the way he had left it in the morning. Even the tie he had left on the floor, after deciding last minute that it didn’t go with his suit, was untouched. Now this was curious, but still, Lucifer felt like you must be playing hard to get. He sent you one text message, before going to bed

“Call me when you can!”

The day after that, he figured his part was done! By reaching out first, he had already made a big compromise, so now it was your turn! To reach out, come home! But that didn’t happen that day, or the day after that.

Three days after the text message,Lucifer was getting worried. He was looking at his phone every other minute. Always making sure he hadn’t accidently put it on silent or missed any texts. He sent more messages, telling you he was sorry and that he wanted you to come home. That he would listen and spend more time with you, promising luxurious dates and weekend trips, if only you forgave him. You didn’t even open the messages.

“Lucifer are you listening?” Decker was insanely annoyed at her partner’s lack of concentration

“Sorry detective. I’ve...I’ve got a lot on my mind”

“Well, better get it out of the way now, so that we can move on to our case!” she said, cleaning out her desk quickly, before resting back into her chair “Talk to me!”

“It’s Y/N. I’m worried about her!”

“Why?” “We...had a fight a couple days ago and she left. She hasn’t come back since”

“Have you heard from her at all?”

“No…” Lucifer said, embarrassed at his own lack of care for you. He should have called you earlier, reached out more! He should have tried harder!

“How long had she been missing for?”

“4...maybe 5 days…”

“Lucifer, are you sane? And you’re only telling me now?!” Chloe jumped from her seat, turning on her computer

“I thought she needed space! I thought she was avoiding me intentionally cause she was angry! I didn’t know…” Lucifer choked back a sob, not wanting to break down in tears in the middle of the precinct

“Lucifer!” Chloe caught hold of his hand “I’m gonna find her! I promise you!” A few days later, she did. Well, more like Y/n came to her, in the shape of a pretty little gift box left on Decker's doorstep.

“A lil too late on your case detective” read the note attached to it.

Inside were Y/N’s clothes, all of them stained with dark, dried blood. Y/N was declared dead that day and the case was closed. At her funeral, only her closests friends were present. Lucifer wanted it to be as intimate as possible.

That day was also the first time anyone had seen Lucifer, since the news. His eyes were bloodshot and the dark circles under his eyes almost matched the black suit he was wearing. Throughout the ceremony he kept twisting his wedding band, a habit he’d picked up on since you went missing. He chose not to do a speech, but once the crowd disappeared, and he was left face to face with your grave, he pulled out a little piece of paper from his pocket and sat down on the grass.

“In hell, everyone feared me. There, I was nothing but another server of the universe, ruling over an empire I never really wanted, because I never had a choice. So eventually I left, thinking anywhere will be better than what I had, and I came to earth.

I ran into you about 2 weeks later, before I really even knew how to behave myself. Before I knew anything about who I really was besides ‘the devil’. I longed to know, grow and discovers different sides of me, where I could be something new, and you gave it to me. You made me who I never thought I could possibly be. You made me a lover. I never thought of myself as capable to love anyone, in any degree, but your light shone everywhere you went and your kindness touched me and everyone around you. It became impossible to not get infatuated with your person. I allowed you to see and feel around every dark corner of my soul and being and every time I thought it was the end. Everytime I would take in your touch as if it was the last, I would prepare myself for abandonment, but it never came. Through everything you stood by my side and when I felt my darkest, you gave me a fistful of your light and that was enough to keep me going. You married a broken man and called him perfect, despite everyone telling you how much of a foul you were. Even then, you shooed them away. Even then you chose me. I wasn’t worthy of your love or your trust and our last night together proved it.

You’re not here anymore to hear my apologies and I’ll never forgive myself for it. You’ve gone now somewhere I can not follow, but I know you are well taken care of there. I hope, someway, somehow, you’ll hear these words: I am sorry. I loved you with my entire soul. Not listening to you was the biggest mistake of my life and I’ll never forgive myself. I choose however, to remember you as you were, because I know that’s what you’d want. I’ll remember you and your laugh.I’ll remember our date nights and shopping sprees. Nights in Lux or on the penthouse balcony. I’ll remember all the meals you prepared for me and the flirtatious remarks you used to make, because you thought they were so silly. I’ll remember the little frown on your face whenever you worked on an important project for work and I’ll remember every evening walk around the block you’d make me accompany you on. I know I always complained about them, but they were always fun. Everything I ever did with you was always fun.

I loved you. I still do. You are my everything Y/N. Thank you for devoting yourself to me in all the ways that you did. I’ll forever live on in my heart.“

~~~

It had been months since your disappearance. After all this time, you finally managed to escape your kidnappers and report them to the New York police station, since that’s where you had been held hostage for so long. As soon as the paperwork was done and you were sure that the people who ruined you were getting the punishment they deserved, you jumped on a train and headed straight back home. Straight to Lucifer.

Lux looked exactly the same as you had left it. You were washed over by a wave of comfort that almost brought you to tears. Home. You never thought you’d get to step in here again. Overwhelmed, you took a seat on one of the couches, allowing your head to rest back on it, as you took in every detail of your surroundings: the feel of the leather on your fingertips, the cool breeze of the air conditioning, the warm lights. Everything was still here.

“Y/N?” you jumped at the sound

“Hi love…” your voice broke as you said those words. Words you never thought you would be able to mutter again. The sight of your husband, messy as he was, made you weak in the knees. He was standing at the top of the staircase, dressed in nothing but his robe, tied carelessly around his waist. He had probably just woken up. You wanted to say something again, but before you could, he laughed

“Nope” he said simply, before making his way down the stairs and to the bar “I’m not doing this. Not today, not ever!” Lucifer filled his glass to the top with bourbon, before turning around and trying to leave back to where he came from

“Lucifer, it's me!”

“Sure you are, except you’re not real! Nice of dad, taking my ability to stay endlessly sober, getting me drunk, forcing visions of my dead wife onto me to teach me another lesson about managing my emotions. Real clever, except this is too much! So I’m going to enter that elevator and I expect to never have to see you again, hum? Right, well, au revoir now!” he continued on his way, but before he could get far, you were clutching on the silk tie of his robe. Lucifer felt the tug around his waist and turned around slowly to look at you, this time a little more unsure. As if he was trying to figure you out

“Lucifer, I’m Y/N. I escaped”

“Escaped? But that’s impossible, she died! I saw it-”

“What you saw was a bloody shirt!” he looked up to meet your gaze, tears already forming “They lied to you Lucifer”

Finally, it seemed like he had connected all of the pieces of the puzzle. The glass of alcohol fell to the ground and your husband wrapped you in a big hug for the first time in months. He nuzzled his head in your hair and took in your scent, your figure, your warmth. Hell, you were even more perfect that he remembered! Silent tears fell down both of your cheeks as you collapsed to the ground, still holding onto each other for dear life

“I’m so sorry” Lucifer sobbed in your hair “I’m so so sorry”

“It wasn’t your fault Luci”

“If I hadn’t been a jerk you wouldn’t have left! If I would have simply listened to you, they wouldn’t have gotten to you! You would’ve stayed here, where you belong! You would have stayed with me but instead I was too busy with my stupid job and the stupid cases and I’m sorry! I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry” he continued crying on your shoulder as you rubbed small circles on his back

“I’m here now my love” you whispered, kissing his cheek “And I’m not going anywhere”

#lucifer #lucifer netflix #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer morningstar imagine #lucifer morningstar angst #lucifer morningstar

915 notes · View notes

itskatastrophe-x · 3 years

Text

Finally Home (c!Sapnap x Reader)

I let my twitter followers decide who I wrote a oneshot for, and they wanted c!Sapnap, so here it is :) Written in the span of like... Idk 2 hours?? It’s a soulmate AU where you can feel everything your soulmate feels when you get in a certain distance of them and it gets stronger the closer you get to them. I hope yall like it!!

Word count : 2,701

^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^

There it was again. That burning sensation on the palms of your hands. You didn’t understand where it came from or why it was happening, but it hurt like hell. You wondered if it would ever stop, but you doubted it would. You knew the stories all too well but figured it would never happen to you, and slowly your fears confirmed it as all of your friends got theirs and eventually found their person. A soulmate. The way they talked about how they could feel what their soulmate felt on a physical level. They would feel light brushes against their arms or bumps when the other person would be somewhere busy. All of your friends had found their other halves years ago, explaining that when it happened there was a jolt like electricity in their bodies. After all of your friends had abandoned you, you had given up hope in ever finding your person. So you travelled. For miles and miles and miles, seeing every country, village, and kingdom your empty heart desired. You had lost everyone you loved and couldn’t even find your soulmate.

Then it happened all too suddenly. If you had to guess, it happened when you got within range of the person, so you kept up your pace and travelled. It was an unpleasant sensation. It felt like fire all over your body. At first it was a small stinging, then the farther you travelled, the closer you got to this person, it grew. You would wake up in the middle of the night screaming because of cuts and wounds your other half would experience. You wished it was something as simple as the things your friends had gone through, but this was a nightmare. You wished you could meet this person once and for all just so you could give them a strong right hook to the jaw, then changed your mind as you remembered that you would also feel it.

You knew by the things you were going through that this person was crazy and potentially dangerous with the amount of wounds this person was accumulating through the weeks of you travelling, so you did your best to be delicate. Whenever you would feel a new pain, you would prepare healing potions and drink them in hopes that the other person would also feel the effects. Either that or, if it didn’t feel like a gash or deep cut, you would trace your fingers over the spot gently to sooth the other person to let them know you would comfort them. What you couldn’t stand, though, was the feeling of fire dancing around your fingers. You eventually learned to tune it out and numb yourself to it, so it wasn’t nearly as bad as it was when it started, but it was still painful and annoying.

Then it stopped as suddenly as it started. For three whole days. Three. Days. After the first couple hours of the first day you started to worry. It was rare that you got a single second of rest from this crazy asshole, but three days? Part of you hoped he wasn’t dead, but the other part was happy you didn’t have to deal with scratches, bruises, and burning. But you missed it so much that you wished the burning in your palms returned. Nothing stopped you from continuing on though, even though you had no idea if you were going the right way anymore or not. You used the pain as a guide for weeks to lead you closer, but when it stopped, you lost your physical compass. Something in your heart told you that you were still heading towards them though, so you kept on, this time faster and without much sleep. You wanted to make sure this person was ok, and fast. You watched all of your friends leave you, you couldn’t have your literal soulmate leave you as well.

When the third day ended and you were about to fall asleep, you felt it. The smallest little touch to your cheek you had ever felt. It was out of the blue and you had never felt such a touch come from the other person, so it woke you up instantly. You laid there for a moment, the stroking on your cheek so soft and faint that you wondered if it was even the person at all. Slowly, you lifted your hand to your other cheek and caressed it. The feeling on your other cheek stopped, but the feeling of a hand still stayed there. That’s when you knew it was them. They knew you would feel it, but probably weren’t expecting you to return the feeling to them. The stroking started again, so you stroked your other cheek for them as well. Then it hit you. Why had you never thought of it before? After weeks of knowing you had a soulmate out there, it just now hit you. You sat up from your bed in the little hotel you were staying at and tapped your leg. The feeling on your cheek stopped then you felt the same tap on your leg again. You smiled and pressed your hand down for a second and felt more pressure a couple seconds later.

Then you started. At first it was a smiley face, then letters one at a time to write to the person. You asked their age first. Then you felt the pressure of the person writing back. “20”. You drew yours back, then they drew a smile to confirm they got it. You asked their name. “Nick” they wrote back. Then you wrote yours. You got as much information as you could from this small communication as possible so you could find him easier. After your small exchange, you got up, got dressed, packed your things and headed towards a location called “Dream SMP”. You had seen it on maps before, but it was so far away that you thought you would never get there. You had already crossed oceans, rivers, and mountains for this man, but now you had a new fire to feel. A fire burning so deep in you that it ignited in your eyes. You used all the money and resources you had to get there. You bought boats and horses for the days leading up to your arrival.

After over a month of travelling, you finally made it to the outside borders of what was known as the DreamSMP. The streets were full and bustling with life. Most people smiled and greeted you as a new member, fully accepting you the second you set foot on the land, others scowled or threw hateful words your way, possibly thinking you wouldn’t hear, or maybe they hoped you would so you would leave. You asked around about this person “Nick” and got an overwhelming response of happy chatter and protests of anger, so you left as politely as you could to search on your own.

You felt like it would take forever to find this other person if all of the streets and businesses would be this crowded and overwhelming, until you came across one man standing at the edge of a river with his eyes closed and a smile on his face. His fluffy brown hair flipped up in the front and slightly waved in the breeze, the colors he wore matching his vibe completely. You approached him cautiously at first, but felt comforted by the aura he gave off. You cleared your throat quietly, so as not to startle him, and he opened his eyes slowly to greet you, the lightest shade of blue you had ever seen. He gave you a soft smile and waved you over, so you complied.

For a second, you wondered if this was him, but you took note of his soft, clear looking skin and the lack of electricity as you neared him. When you got next to him, he pointed across the river to a very ornate village sitting on the hills surrounded by flower forests. “Have you ever seen anything so beautiful?” You stared in awe at the mushroom buildings and statue and smiled at him. “I’ve travelled a long way to get here and passed hundreds of kingdoms, but this tops them all,” you replied. He made a noise of agreement and smiled, content with your answer. “Well, tell me, new face, how did you make your way to Kinoko Kingdom, and why are you here?” There was no malice in his voice as he asked and you could tell he was being friendly so you knew you wasn’t being standoffish. “I came to meet my soulmate,” you answered. His eyes went wide and met yours, a look of shock on his face. “Th-that’s you?!” You looked at him, furrowing your brows. How did he know? As if to read your mind, he continued. “I knew he was expecting someone, but, wow… I mean… He’s gonna want to meet you now. He literally hasn’t shut up for weeks about you.” You stammered for a second as he grabbed your hand and started running, barely giving you any reaction time to keep up with him. He was fast and energetic and you liked it. He seemed friendly and bubbly and his touch was comforting.

He weaved in and out of streets and occasional bystanders watching the two of you with wide eyes and gaping mouths. You took it these people didn’t see many new faces, seeing as they were small in numbers. He didn’t slow down until both of you were panting in front of a giant cherry blossom tree in front of the biggest library you had seen. You could hear a loud voice echoing out of the open hole, acting as a doorway. The man next to you put a hand on your shoulder and you looked over at his grinning face. “I should explain before you get in there… My name is Karl and Sapnap, or Nick, is my fiancé. Now before you get worried, we’re in an open, poly relationship and he’s talked to me about all of this and I am 100% welcoming you into our little family.” He gave you a warm smile that reached his eyes so you knew he was being sincere.

A booming shout broke your thoughts and you felt a pain in your toe that almost made you fall over, then loud laughter erupted. You smiled and shook off your foot as Karl motioned you inside, and that’s all you needed to run inside. The space inside was open with books lining the high walls. There was a staircase to your right, a mushroom in the far back, and a balcony above your head. There you saw him. At first he stood there laughing with the other man in front of him, not realizing you were inside, so you stared. You felt something like fire dancing across your skin lightly as you watched him with wide eyes. He was more beautiful than anyone you had ever seen. He had his jet black hair tied into a messy, low bun at the back of his head, a scar across the length of his face that went across the bridge of his nose. He had a light dusting of freckles across his rosy cheeks and the most piercing eyes. The man in front of him caught onto your stare and nudged the man, pointing down at you from their spot on the balcony. When his eyes met yours, a shiver went up your spine and your skin felt hot, like you were now encased in a cocoon of fire. For a moment you both just stared at each other, not being able to move, until you felt a pair of hands push you gently from behind.

That’s all it took to move you. You took off towards the stairs and took them two at a time as he ran to meet you on the landing. You collided into the biggest hug that knocked the wind out of your lungs and almost sent you flying backwards, but he kept you steady. Your eyes welled up for a moment and you laughed into his chest. He smelled like a campfire, fir trees, and old books. He was so warm and your body fit his so perfectly under his arms. You heard footsteps coming up the stairs and a soft touch to your shoulder, a small hum coming from Karl behind you. “Thank god you’re finally here. Sapnap literally would not shut up. He always talked about how soft you were with him when he knew how hard it must have been for you. Weeks. Weeks.” Sapnap reached an arm out to punch Karl, but he dodged easily since Sapnap still hadn’t let you go. You chuckled and closed his eyes as he put his arm back over your shoulder and squeezed you closer to him.

“I can’t believe you’re real,” he whispered into your hair. He squeezed him and smiled. “You thought I wasn’t?” He sighed and relaxed his shoulders. “I thought you would hate me. I’m so reckless and get hurt all the time. How could anyone want me if they feel what I feel?” You pulled back to look him in the eyes and you gave him the most genuine smile you had ever had on your face. “You’re stupid. Of course I would be here. And I will stay here. I’ll take care of all your bumps, scrapes, and stabs. The pain means nothing so long as I know you’re ok.” His pointed ears turn a bright red and he averts his gaze to the floor, so you bring your hand to his cheek gently. At first he flinches, but soon closes his eyes, sighs, and leans into your hand, his lip slightly quivering from such tenderness.

“I do have one question, though.” He hums, not opening his eyes. “Why do my palms always burn? Do you just, like, constantly sit around a campfire?” He chuckles and slowly lifts his head, eyes opening to look at you. He pulls back from you slightly, keeping one arm around your waist as he watches his hand, then back to your face to watch your eyes on his hand. In an instant, his hand is surrounded by fire, the burning in your hand starting up. He must have liked the look on your face because he lets out a snort and then starts laughing, all while you stand there in awe at the power he held. “Holy shit… And… And that’s real fire? Just like that?” You look back at him and he gives you a shy smile and a nod of his head as the fire goes out. There was a sparkle in your eyes that he was absolutely enchanted by and he hoped he would get to see that for the rest of his life. You let out a small huff of amazement and smile brightly. “You are the most amazing person I have ever met,” you say quietly as you watch his features soften as he’s left speechless.

“Oh get a room,” the guy behind Sapnap says, his voice thick with an accent and sarcasm, the sound of a smile in his words. Sapnap looks at the man and points at him, shooting off a mini fire at him. His shirt catches for a second before the man screams and smacks himself to put it out. You laugh as you watch the exchange and Sapnap looks back at you, thinking of how beautiful your laugh sounds. “Well,” Karl starts. “We have a lot to talk about! Ooooooh this is so exciting! We need to know more about you!!” He grabs both of you and pulls you down the stairs and out to the pond next to the tree out front, the sun finally setting over the hills, casting a gorgeous, fiery glow on your soulmate’s features. You couldn’t wait to see what their life was like. To kiss all of his scars and tell him how amazing he was. To run your fingers through his raven feather-looking hair. Oh how you loved this.

159 notes · View notes

itsclydebitches · 2 years

Note

To add on to the whole found family post, am I the only one who thought Rwby slowly becoming like the Aceops and separating would be a plot point? Right after Harriet said her line, "we're not friends, we're co-workers", Ruby goes to her team and asks them if they want to hang out together and they all refuse. And this happens again when they get their break. They feel more like the Aceops than the Aceops. They're there for each other for plot moments but are off doing their own thing in their free times.

That's a really good scene to point to because yeah, it occurs immediately after Harriet's announcement that the Ace Ops are professionals first, friends second. Ruby's desire to do something fun is framed as a reaction to what Harriet has said. The group looks stunned by the idea that they're not BFFs with everyone they work with, Ruby in particular clearly doesn't like that, so she reaches for confirmation that they remain Best Friends Forever and aren't anything like the Ace Ops. Let's go exploring! Let's see the sights! What amazing, cool, fun, friendship things are we going to do, the four of us together, to prove that it's normal for a team to spend every waking moment together, both on and off the job?

But unanimously everyone says, 'Nothing.' They're depicted as exactly like the Ace Ops in that they did their job and now they want to go off and live their own lives for a bit. Blake announces that the only place she's going to is her bed. Weiss appears legitimately annoyed with Ruby's travel plans after they just flew in by airship and were running around on foot all night.

(For the record, all my screenshots this post are weird banner sizes because RT won't let me watch the episode without a giant login ad anymore? That's annoying.)

Yang goes one step further by reminding Ruby that they nearly died, also looking a little fed up with the exuberance.

And when everyone is done — literally and symbolically walking away from her — Ruby is left looking dejected.

This should have been the beginnings of them all, but particularly Ruby, learning that it's okay to approach being a huntress with professionalism, not just friendship. We literally have all the pieces here: callbacks to that Volume 2 conversation where they realize that their desires have to come second to the job, the theme in Volume 6 that they're no longer kids at a boarding school and are developing their own lives, the Ace Ops positioned as mentors in this episode that they should be learning from, hints at Ruby's fear of abandonment: the way she instantly jumps on activities to reassure herself here, later panicking at the idea of splitting up to accomplish two tasks, her breakdown when she's reunited with Yang, making foolish decisions in battle because she's afraid Qrow is going to die facing Tyrian, much of this stemming from actually watching Penny and Pyrrha die... I'd argue that there's a lot to support Ruby having as many, if not more abandonment issues as Yang, the story just doesn't grapple with it like it did with Raven. Regardless, here's this chance to have the group grow into adulthood, focusing on a very common worry that young adults go through. Namely, am I losing my friends now that we're no longer spending every moment in school together? Does their need for time alone mean they actually just hate me, specifically? None of us can coordinate a get-together because we have much more complex lives now and that's scary. We could have gotten a story where the girls learned from the Ace Ops and came to terms with the fact that yes, of course they're friends, but that doesn't mean they need to be joined at the hip 24/7. They have a job to do and individual lives to lead outside of their team. Tie it to Nora wanting an identity outside of Ren. Tie it to Blake and Yang first refusing to separate and then being terrified that the other will hate them when they're forced to. Tie it to Ren's announcement that yeah, they're still incredibly inexperienced and good god they've made things worse. This team has so many internal problems to work through, the story often sets up an excellent arc in which they can do just that... and then we swerve at the last second into something nonsensical.

Never-mind, the Ace Ops are simply evil cops, codependency equals the Power of Love, Ren is 100% wrong, and no one cares that Ruby equates a strategic split with Salem's desire to divide humanity. Nothing worrisome about that mindset at all.

In cataloguing those "We were so close" examples, I think it's notable that IRONWOOD is the one who finds the compromise. Meaning, everyone is ready to head off, leaving Ruby dejected, until Penny prematurely reveals that there's a surprise party planned for them, specifically one that exists to give them their licenses. It's a work party. The best of both worlds. They're functioning as professionals AND friends in this space, technically there out of duty and responsibility, but in actuality being given the chance to wind down and spend time together — the exact thing Ruby was looking for. This is a moment that should show her that leaning into huntressing as a job rather than a BFF pastime doesn't mean she's actually losing her friends.

Yet instead of following the thread of Ruby finding reassurance in the presence of her team through professional expectations, she's sitting alone in the bleachers. Not because the story is about to grapple with those worries paradoxically isolating her, but because... Ruby needs to be alone so Qrow can tell her she's nothing like Ozpin? So he can discuss Summer while Yang is taking selfies? Volume 7 is arguably a lot better than 8, but there are still a ton of plot threads that fizzle out by the next episode, if not the next scene.

(Side-note: my Volume 8 frustration that Penny immediately ditched Ironwood without any real difficulty was rekindled as I watched her praising him for improving his exit speeches.

She was born in his military and has served as a member of his inner circle since the Fall of Beacon, but nah, why would she have split loyalties? Penny is going go make a generic claim that Ironwood doesn't let her have friends after he leaves her at a party solely so she can hang with her friends. My nonexistent kingdom for some consistency 😭)

#rwde #rwby #mymetas

40 notes · View notes

cheegu3 · 3 years

Text

~ Yandere Hyunjin - X31 [CULT SPECIAL 2/2 PTS]

tw / trigger warning: yandere themes, cult themes (brainwashing etc), violence, blood/gore, murder, disturbing themes, swearing

wc: 3k

a/n: so I’m a bit tipsy and wrote this just like really quickly idek what’s going on or if this is shit lmao sorry, I will proofread this tomorrow mwah love u

summary: the gang from your hometown that you knew as criminals had now kidnapped you and as they take you to their destination you soon find out they’re actually a cult, will you be able to escape or will you become their pet forever?

‘‘ You’re..them ‘‘ you muttered at last somehow sounding disbelieved.

‘‘ You must’ve known right? At least a part of you knew all along ‘‘ he answered with a smirk.

You huffed.

‘‘ If I knew, don’t you think I would’ve fought back harder than I did? ‘‘ you looked at him coldly.

‘‘ Well actually- ‘‘ he leaned in closer to you, so close that you could see your own reflection in his crazy, empty brown eyes.

‘‘ I think you wanted this ‘‘ he adds.

‘‘ W-what are you fucking crazy? ‘‘ you exclaimed hysterically, the panic was overtaking your body every second that passed.

He nodded and the smirk was back again as if he enjoyed seeing you like this. You bet he had seen way worse captures of his, who suffered a lot more.

‘‘ You want to know why? ‘‘ he asked tauntingly.

He didn’t even give you a chance to answer before he went on.

‘‘ You’re a lonely pathetic woman in her 20s. You have no job, no money, no boyfriend or husband and no family ‘‘ he said this in such a mocking manner that it took you aback. You felt like your whole body went cold, like you were an insect under his magnifying glass and after he had inspected you he crushed you.

This was all too much for you. You tried the best that you could to turn away from him, sort of looking out the window - only, all the windows were covered up and you assumed it was to make you feel disoriented and not see where you were. It was smart, you’d admit that. On top of that the leader had kept you occupied so you didn’t even get the chance to feel what ways the car was turning to somehow name your location.

He didn’t say anything more for the rest of the ride except for a low,

‘‘ I’m Hyunjin. The leader ‘‘

Then he left you alone, you weren’t sure if he was watching you but it sure felt like his eyes never left you, even when you were turned so that you couldn’t see him in the corner of your eye, the feeling of his gaze lingered.

Not long after, the van came to an abrupt stop throwing you forwards slightly. The doors were slid open revealing the familiar guys from before. Only three of them were in the doorway now though, one shorter one with freckles, the other shorter one with a mean and stern looking face and one that looked like a golden retriever. As you looked at them you wondered how they had ended up here in this gang. They were once normal people just like yourself, what happened to them? Perhaps...they were kidnapped like yourself and they would try to make you one of them?

‘‘ Get out ‘‘ the mean looking one barked at you and then said to Hyunjin ‘‘ We’re here master. Everything is ready ‘‘

The leader reached over again to unbuckle your seatbelt but he wasn’t really looking at you this time, he seemed to be in a hurry. In fact he seemed to be so stressed when you had stepped out that he swept you off your feet. You yelped in surprise but he wasted no time, walking straight away towards the buildings doors.

It looked like it was some kind of abandoned church. It was worn down and dark, covered in graffiti and had several white sheets covering up the window. You shivered at the creepy vibe it gave off, it looked like the perfect place for a gang.

As your group approached the entry doors, two of the guys from before hurried up in front to hold the doors open for Hyunjin and you. You felt him walk again and you tried to turn from your place in his arms to look around. You gasped.

People in masks and dark cloaks stood in a circle around some kind of table. The walls were dirty and worn out just like the outside and the familiar church seats didn’t look very familiar anymore, they were filled with clutter like books and candles. More candles decorated the walls and it had weird drawn symbols in white and red, which looked too much like blood.

You desperately tried to crawl out but his arms clinging onto you only got harder, tightening the grip. You were coming closer and closer to the group who had now turned when they noticed your presence. The group split in the middle, making way for you to pass through. You heart dropped when you had passed by the people.

Right there was an altar. It had old dry blood ingrained in it all over. By how the dried blood looked like it had run down the sides, you thought about how much blood there had to have been there, they probably killed someone and the thought of it makes you sick.

He sat you down unexpectedly gentle and stepped back slightly while looking at you. You felt like there wasn’t a chance in hell to escape with the mob getting ever so closer as the seconds passed, soon they’d be suffocating you although it felt like their mere presence was already doing that.

‘‘ W-what, where am I...Hyunjin ‘‘ you said his name slowly as if trying it out.

His expressions didn’t change, he looked cold like he had done that same night you met him.

‘‘ Y/n, I’ve had my eyes on you for a long time. Planning, waiting for the perfect moment to take you away ‘‘ he explained calmly.

You didn’t say anything but when he said he’d been watching you for a long time you felt chills down your spine again. You didn’t feel safe here and you didn’t know what they wanted.

‘‘ Master decided to save you ‘‘ one of the mob whispered in an almost hysteric voice.

They looked really riled up or quite frankly, crazy - from the way they got closer and closer and how they looked at their leader with so much admiration, like he was some sort of God.

‘‘ Save me? ‘‘ you asked looking straight at Hyunjin to try to read his face.

You thought that maybe they were just joking but he still didn’t move a muscle. He took a deep breath before speaking again.

‘‘ You see, all the people out there they’re really bad people. They have turned to the false God and I’m the only one who can save you ‘‘ he answered fairly casually studying your face and reaction to what he had said.

‘‘ Uh, false God? ‘‘

‘‘ Jesus and his father ‘‘

You huffed. It still felt like a joke but the people surrounding you made you doubt it. Either they were really good actors or this crazy man had taken advantage of vulnerable people and brainwashed them into worshipping him.

‘‘ He’s evil and tries to mask his evil words with acts of ‘‘ kindness ‘‘ ‘’ he air-quoted the word kindness and looked truly annoyed as he explained this to you.

You weren’t really sure how to respond.

‘‘ I...Appreciate that and what you do but I would like to go home now, is that okay? ‘‘ you tried.

‘‘ No ‘‘

Silence followed. You felt like the mob were silently judging you and maybe even hated you because you got all this attention from their precious leader.

‘‘ U-um well I do have to go, I’m not interested sorry ‘‘ you swung your legs over the stone seat and put your feet on the ground below.

He didn’t move from his spot which made you hopeful, but then when you approached the mob expecting them to step aside for you to pass - they didn’t. They stood just as still, just like him. You saw him turn to you and then felt a hard grip around your forearm.

He was angry but you also saw some hint of disgust in his eyes.

‘‘ See everyone how grateful you are that I saved you, see what could’ve become of you. We’ve got a lot of work to do with this one ‘‘ he said to the mob while staring into your eyes. He smirked for a moment and that’s when you realised, this was a cult.

He was fully aware of the truth vs made up things and how he affected all these people but you supposed he liked the power. It made you sick yet again to think about how many lives he had ruined by spewing such nonsense.

His loyal followers all shouted in union,

‘‘ Yes master! ‘‘

Before Hyunjin started to drag you to a doorway at the opposite side of the room. It felt like his grip was getting tighter and tighter and you groaned quietly at the pain, it was sure to leave bruises but you knew he didn’t care - he had probably left a fair amount of bruises on his followers before.

He took you through the doorway and turned to the right. You reached a long stone corridor that felt very creepy. He kept dragging you until he had gotten to the room at the end of the corridor. There, he still kept his iron grip on you while fumbling in his pockets to take out a silver key.

‘‘ This is where you will be staying ‘‘

Anger bubbled up inside you. Who is he to decide that he was gonna ‘’ save you ‘’ to kidnap you and to order you around without you having a choice? It made you feel so belittled, and because of it you hated him already and what made it worse is the fact that you were pretty sure he enjoyed it.

He shoved you in and closed the door behind him swiftly without turning his back to you, smart, he didn’t even give you one opportunity to escape him.

‘‘ Tomorrow will be your first ritual, you should be excited ‘‘ he gave you a small smile.

You wanted to punch him so bad, to kick and scream and to run for your life. The room he had pushed you into was as cold-stoned as the corridor had been, literally. It looked like an old-school prison cell in those castles with stone floor, walls and ceiling. The windows were barred shut and was way too high up for you to reach anyway.

The only thing that made it look anything other than a prison cell was the double bed in the middle of the furthest wall. It had scarlet velvet looking covers and looked quite comfortable. In that moment you wanted nothing more than for him to leave so you could let your growing exhaustion take over you and figure out a plan to escape later after resting.

And so he actually did - to your surprise. You suppose it was because of the look of burning hate you had given him this whole time or that you had refused to answer him but whatever the reason, you felt relieved.

He sighed and left, closing the door rather harshly after him but you didn’t even look at him, he didn’t deserve that.

Your head found the pillow automatically and you let your body relax, falling asleep not that long after.

‘‘ Hello? Y/n get the fuck up ‘‘ the distant voice who had been mumbling, or least that’s what it sounded like to you - suddenly started to get louder and clearer.

You body jerked awake when you realised it wasn’t a dream and the first thing you saw when you opened your eyes was those brown eyes of the leader himself. He looked annoyed, like you were just a burden to him and the fact that you’d woken up so late was just another inconvenience.

He rolled his eyes.

‘‘ Finally. We haven’t got all day Ms princess ‘‘

You yawned at looked at him still half-asleep. You got up without protesting though because you didn’t want to anger him any more.

You wasted no time and even got dressed in front of him, ignoring his presence while continuing to be in a dazed and tired state.

He seemed to wait as patiently as he could but that didn’t stop him from sending you glares every now and then.

At last you were ready, dressed in a white plain summery dress that had been put out for you to wear. You noticed while walking up to him that he was now wearing very light coloured clothes as well - a strong contrast to the day before. He didn’t have his piercings on, his tattoos were covered and he wore long white linen clothes. You gagged at the thought of him picking out clothes just so you would match.

‘‘ Come on ‘‘ he mumbled. His patience seemed to be running out.

He opened the door and basically pushed you out in front of him, then he closed the door once again and followed quickly. It felt like he was breathing down your neck, not giving you any space to - you assumed - not make you get away. You ignored him being that close and focused on his directions instead. He told you to go back the same way you had come from and out of the church, into a garden where the ‘’ ceremony ‘’ as he called it would happen.

You stayed silent and walked to where he wanted you to. The church was empty, which was a bit odd but you kept going until you laid your hands on the big doors again and pushed it open.

You recognised the place you had been at yesterday, even the car was still there. But you couldn’t do anything, not even get close to the car before Hyunjin barked his orders,

‘‘ Right. Then walk straight to the garden. No stopping ‘‘ and you reacted like a robot, casting one last sorrowful look at a possible escape route.

You followed his directions and walked into a clearing in the forest the church had been hiding behind itself. The mob was there again.

Of course

You thought yourself and couldn’t stop your hand from forming a fist. More people, less chance of escaping. But where else would they be if not by the side of their precious leader?

They gave you very genuinely happy smiles which freaked you out and you smiled back awkwardly to not feel like you were being rude. As you approached the group Hyunjin put his fingertips to your upper back guiding you forwards, or rather to the middle of the circle again who parted once you got close, allowing you to pass through.

Then you spotted it, another altar.

But this time you weren’t really scared, until Hyunjin told you lay down on it and his words from before rang in your head over and over again,

‘‘ Tomorrow will be your first ritual, you should be excited ‘‘

Fuck

What was going to happen to you now?

‘‘ Welcome everyone ‘’ he started off his speech, turning to the gathered crowd.

‘’ We’ve gathered here today to make a union, to forever bond the master, the greatest, to y/n, the princess ‘‘

Your head was spinning. It felt like the coldness of the stone you were laying on had transferred to your blood, making it ice cold. You weren’t even sure if you were alive anymore or if this was possibly just a dream.

‘‘ Y/n? ‘‘ he suddenly called out which caught your attention.

You turned your head to him, tears threatening to fall any second now.

‘‘ I have to do this, for us to be together forever ‘‘ he said this in an almost pitiful way and your gut knew what was coming but you didn’t want to believe it.

You were going to fight and be optimistic until the last second.

‘‘ You first, then me okay? If you keep still this will be quicker ‘‘ the fact that he looked truly sorry made you forget for a moment what kind of person he was.

He walked up to you and you got so enhanced in his eyes, it was easy to see how all the other people had believed his lies. You were even ready to accept your faith, and so you did the only thing you could - you closed your eyes and waited.

You weren’t sure but you think you heard him say ‘’ good girl ‘’ under his breath. You also heard some distant hushed talking and some items being scraped together but you held you breath and kept your eyes closed, it was for the best.

No closed eyes or deep breaths could’ve prepared you for what came next though,

the pain was unbearable. A cold metal that was sharp penetrated your chest causing you to scream out.

‘‘ Stop! Stop! Stop! ‘‘

Hyunjin hushed you comfortingly and stroke your hair slowly, placing small kisses to your forehead but you barely felt them - the pain was so overpowering it felt like it was the only thing you felt.

Eventually when your breaths started becoming more heavy and your vision started to get blurrier, you opened your eyes one last time. You saw the man you had started to hate in such a short time, now...he was your killer.

Then you closed your eyes again and waited and waited while it felt like the liquid had decorated your entire body, hell maybe even the whole forest.

At last, after much suffering

the world did become black and you were finally at peace.

#yandere #yandere kpop #kpop yandere #stray kids #stray kids fanfic #stray kids yandere #kpop #kpopidol #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #hyunjin

113 notes · View notes

pennylanefics · 3 years

Text

Remember Her - Derek Hale

a/n: THIS MADE ME SO SOFT I SWEAR I WANNA CRY

•••

It’s been a long day for both you and Derek. You two were out with Scott the entire day trying to find out who the most recent threat to Beacon Hills is. Stiles had a lead, but he had to help his dad with something. So, you three went.

But while you were waiting in the car, Scott pointed something out. He somehow heard four heartbeats, including his own, worrying Derek that someone was in the backseat with you. They are quick to check everywhere, but Scott figures it out. It’s you.

That’s how you found out you were pregnant. Unfortunately, you and Derek didn’t get to celebrate that much since the person you were stalking came out of the building you were parked in front of, and the plan was put in front of everything.

“Who knew Scott would be the one to tell us that we’d be having a baby,” you murmur, running your hands over your stomach. Derek’s eyes follow your motion and his hand comes to rest on yours.

“I’m confused as to why I didn’t hear the heartbeat before he did, though.”

“I’m sure you did, in some way.” He shakes his head and continues rubbing your stomach, a small smile on his face.

“I can’t believe it, though. I’m really happy,” he tells you, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“You are?” You gaze up at him, finding a loving look in his eyes and a bigger smile on his face.

“Yeah. I mean, it is a surprise, but I’ve always known I wanted a family. Maybe not as soon as it’s happening, but that’s fine. Why? Are you not happy?” You hesitate for a moment and sit up, all of the negatives beginning to show up in your mind.

“Part of me is, because I love you so much and I’ve thought a lot about having a family with you.” Derek smiles sweetly and brushes your hair out of your face.

“But, this place isn’t a good place to raise a child,” you finish. “There’s no suitable place for a crib, it’s an industrial loft that you somehow moved into to protect yourself. This isn’t what I’d think of as a home. And I know you love it here, but I don’t think I’d be able to. Maybe we can find an apartment or a small farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, away from Beacon Hills.”

You could feel Derek beginning to grow annoyed. He hated this conversation. He loves his loft, he feels safe here, but he knows how you feel about it sometimes.

“I don’t think this conversation is gonna go well right now,” he says, scooting away from you a little. You sigh out of frustration and turn onto your side. What was supposed to be a happy moment together turned into a small fight.

“You always say that. I understand you have stuff with the pack here, but sometimes, I feel like they’re more important to you than I am.”

“Hey,” Derek suddenly sits up and pulls you with him, grabbing your face gently in his hands so you’re staring right at him. “Don’t ever think that. I may have a connection to them with the pack, but you will always be the most important person to me. You’ve been with me through so much, with Paige dying, and my family dying, to supporting me moving to New York, away from you while you went to college here. I love you so much, and I never want you to think the opposite of that.” Tears form in your eyes as he brings you in for a passionate kiss.

“I love you so much, (Y/N). Just know that you will always and forever be the number one person in my life. Right in front of our baby.” You can’t help but tear up even more and fall into his body, silently crying into his chest

“I’m sorry I made you feel that way,” he whispers. “I promise to give you both a comfortable and great life.”

“It’s-“

“If you say it’s okay, it’s not. I understand where you’re coming from, I just hate the idea of moving away from everyone.”

“I know you do. But, maybe think about it. I don’t want to force you to anything, but it may be a good change.” And for the first time surrounding this topic, you hear a positive response.

“I will, babe.”

—

“So it’s a she?” Derek asks the doctor excitedly, your hands engulfed by his.

“You’re having a baby girl,” she confirms with a smile. Derek kisses you sweetly as she begins to wipe the gel off your stomach. “Would you like copies of the sonogram?”

“Yes please,” you respond, sitting up and lowering your shirt. She leaves the room and Derek has yet to stop grinning.

“You got your wish for a daughter,” you chuckle, reaching for his hands once you sit up in the seat. He takes ahold of your hands again, swinging them side to side like a child.

“I know. So you agree on the name then?” You nod fondly and lean into his chest.

“I do. I think it’ll be a nice way to remember her.” He kisses your forehead softly just as the doctor comes back in the room. She hands you the photos in an envelope and sends you on your way.

Later that night, you and Derek are relaxing on the couch. You have your feet up on the small coffee table as Derek, somehow, is laying horizontal, with his head in your lap. His face is right next to your stomach, one of his favorite past times recently.

“I’m so ready to meet her,” he says, running his fingers over your growing bump. Your own hands run through his hair, scratching his scalp soothingly.

“You’re about five months ahead of that,” you chuckle. “We still have a lot to do to get ready for her.”

“Oh, that reminds me, I called the pack over today to tell them.”

Derek sits up and checks his phone for any updates on where everyone is at. Just then, the loft door slams open, Stiles running in with his baseball bat in hand. Sensing danger, Derek is up and in front of you within seconds, flashing his eyes red and showing his teeth to Stiles.

Scared by his appearance, Stiles stumbles back and hides behind Scott, who guides Allison in. Lydia and Isaac follow behind, shutting the door.

“Dude, what’s with the teeth and eyes? You never ward off us like this!” Stiles yells, setting his bat to the floor. Scott smiles, immediately knowing why. He’s the only one who knows.

“I just thought you were someone else.”

“Okay, so why’d you call us here?” Derek brings you to stand and tells them all to sit in your place on the couch. Scott, Allison, Stiles, and Lydia pile onto the couch while Isaac stands behind them.

“So, what’s up?” Allison wonders.

You were nervous to tell them both the good and bad news. Derek’s eyebrows raise in a teasing manner, waiting for you to talk.

“There’s a couple things we want to tell you guys,” you begin.

“You’re pregnant,” Stiles says in a joking tone, laughing after the fact. You stay silent, trying to conceal your smile. “Wait.” He quickly catches on.

“Shut up, you’re pregnant?” Allison excitedly yells.

“Yeah,” you respond with a huge grin on your lips. Her and Lydia jump up to pull you in for a hug, congratulating you.

“I thought I heard another heartbeat,” Isaac says, hugging you tightly. “Congratulations, you’re going to be an amazing mother.”

“Thank you, Isaac. That’s actually how we found out. Scott heard a fourth heartbeat while we were all together.”

“Scott knew and didn’t tell us?” Stiles butts himself into the conversation. Scott shrugs in retaliation.

“Hey, it wasn’t my place to tell. They weren’t ready, and I wasn’t going to blast their business until they were.” You thank him softly, hugging him next.

“So is it a girl or a boy?” Allison questions, Lydia’s eyes wide with wonder as well. Your hands fall to your stomach as you think about the doctor’s visit today.

“It’s a girl. Here!” You run over to your nightstand and grab the sonogram photos, bringing it over so they can see. Everyone passes the photos around as you stand beside your boyfriend, hugging him from the side, watching your closest friends celebrate the amazing news. For now.

“So I’m gonna be an uncle?” Stiles announces. Derek furrows his eyebrows but before he can snarkily respond, you cut him off.

“In a way, yes. But, there’s also something else,” you sadly continue. Everyone’s moods suddenly change at the tone of your voice. Derek’s grip tightens around you comfortingly, nodding in confirmation when you look up at him for support.

“We’re moving,” you tell them. No one moves an inch, their faces contorted in confusion and hurt.

“Moving as in moving out of the loft, or moving to another part of California?” Allison wonders. Your heartbeat quickens and you can feel the tears coming already.

“Actually, moving out of state,” Derek finishes for you. Still, no one moves.

“How far?” Lydida asks.

“Washington.” They all seem to relax just a little knowing that you’re not moving across the country, just one state away.

“Did you buy another house or are you moving into another abandoned loft?” Isaac jokes. Derek laughs and pulls you closer by the waist.

“No. We found a nice farmhouse on a big piece of land. A friend I had from New York was selling it, and he sold it to me at a pretty low price.”

“We’ll really miss you guys,” Scott finally breaks the awkward silence, reaching out to hug both of you together.

“Thank you for being so supportive, Scott,” you whisper.

“Anything for my two closest friends.”

—

Your new house was finally ready for you to move into about a month or so later, so you packed up everything, or lack thereof, in Derek’s loft and left for Washington. Everyone in the pack was there to say goodbye. Lots of tears were shed, promises to visit and call were made, and finally, you were on the road to your new future.

It was a stressful couple of days, Derek doing most of the work since he didn’t want you to overwork yourself. Thankfully, his friend sold the house fully furnished, so you didn’t have to buy any new furniture.

You finish decorating your bedroom by setting a picture frame of you and Derek on your fifth anniversary on your dresser before sitting on the bed and gazing out the large window to the beautiful mountains.

“Nursery is finished,” Derek announces as he walks into your room, flopping down onto the bed beside you. You crawl up to the headboard and wrap his arm around your shoulder to cuddle up against him.

“It’s starting to feel like home,” you say, closing your eyes, enjoying the peace. Derek’s hand comes to rest on your bump, his thumb rubbing over your shirt. He laughs softly when he feels your daughter kick his hand. He plays with her for a few minutes, moving his hand around your stomach to see if she follows. Butterflies fill your stomach from both her kicks and Derek’s warm laughter, your favorite sound.

“She’s going to be such a daddy’s girl,” you tell him. You reach up to kiss him sweetly before settling back down in his arms.

—

“Have you told the pack back home yet?” You ask Derek, quietly closing the door to the nursery of your new home.

It’s been a few days since you’ve given birth to your daughter, and it’s been quite crazy. You’ve barely gotten sleep, haven’t had much time to take a shower, your body is still recovering; basically all the things that come with being a new mother.

“I was just going to. I know Stiles is gonna be mad at me for not telling him the second she was born.” You giggle and curl into his body, eyes falling shut during a rare moment of peace.

“Come on,” he whispers, “let’s head back to our room.” You tiredly follow him down the hall, right into your room.

His phone beeps and buzzes with texts from the group, but he chooses to ignore that for now.

“I love you so much, (Y/N),” he mumbles against your forehead. “I’m so glad you’re the mother of my child, you’re already a perfect mother.”

“You’re already a great dad as well. Who knew the Sourwolf would be such an amazing dad?” He chuckles and slides under the covers.

“You wanna go take a shower before getting into bed?” He asks.

“Ugh, that sounds great. I’ll be quick.”

You do as you promised, taking the quickest yet longest shower you could, and returning back to Derek’s warm embrace as soon as you can. But, you find that he has your daughter resting against his bare chest, a sight that melts your heart.

“How’d everyone react?” You wonder, gently stroking your daughter’s back with your finger.

“They love her name,” he says, adoration dripping from his tone. “Thank you for letting me honor my mom.” You grin up at him and rest your head on his shoulder.

“She didn’t deserve what happened to her. She should have been alive to see her granddaughter.” Derek’s head falls onto yours as Talia stirs in his arms, getting comfortable again.

“Talia Eleanor Hale,” Derek whispers, “I love you so so much. Your grandmother was an incredible woman, and I’ll be sure to tell you every story I remember of her.” A small grin is permanently plastered on your face as he softly tells your daughter stories of his own mother, knowing he’ll never get tired of telling them.

“She’s already so loved,” you say. “By us and by the pack.”

“I know my mother would have loved her too.”

“She’d be really proud of you, Der.” Derek kisses you passionately for a few seconds, then presses his forehead against yours. He sniffles softly, as his emotions slowly take over him.

He’s truly happy in this moment.

“I can’t express how much I love you,” he murmurs.

#derek hale #derek hale imagines #derek hale imagine #derek hale x reader #tyler hoechlin #teen wolf #teen wolf fanfic #imagines #fanfiction #fanfic

280 notes · View notes

heliads · 3 years

Text

Arguments and Abandonment

After a fight causes you to leave Brooklyn and your childhood friend Spot Conlon behind, you decide to trade your old life for Manhattan and try to forget the whole thing. However, your feelings about Spot can’t stay in the past forever, especially when you’re forced to return to Brooklyn once again.

masterlist

You had known Spot for a very long time. You’d been there with him, back when he wasn’t the King of Brooklyn, when neither of you were newsies at all. You had been much younger then, having to protect each other on the streets when all you two had were the shirts on your backs. You trusted him like no one else, and he felt the same about you.

Then, he had become a newsie. Not content to stay back, you had quickly joined the ranks as well, selling papes just as well as anyone else on the street. It didn’t take long for Spot to rise in the ranks (he’d always had a thing for leadership, people just flocked to him. People like you), and soon after that, anyone who was anyone on the streets of New York knew about Spot Conlon. Even when he had all of Brooklyn looking to him for aid, he still came to you for advice, knocking on your door late at night when he didn’t know what to do.

People came to associate you with him. After all, who’d know a guy better than the girl who’d spent most of her life with him? The two of you were always side by side, talking in hushed voices about anyone and everyone who came in your way. Maybe Spot was the King of Brooklyn, but everyone knew that you didn’t mess with Y/N unless you had a death wish. That’s just how it was, how it would always be.

And then you had the argument. It shouldn’t have been anything, shouldn’t have lasted more than a few seconds before you two made amends and forgot the whole mishap. Yet you can still hear the steel in his voice, the way the two of you had fought like you’d never fought before. Probably would never fight again, actually. You don’t think you’ll ever get close enough to him for that to happen.

You suppose the argument itself had been a long time coming. See, it was easier to get along when it was just you and him, when you were still scrawny kids messing around on the streets and getting into trouble. But Spot had been changing, getting taller, showing off muscles that hadn’t always been there. Dark locks of hair curled around his face, falling in his eyes. You had never noticed that before, never noticed any of the hundreds of details that made the boy before you Spot. Even with all the years behind you, you don’t think you’d ever seen him in the way that you do now.

You suppose you yourself had changed. You were more confident, less afraid of what others might think of you. You knew your worth, you knew what you were capable of, and you knew that you should not be spending this much time thinking about Spot Conlon, even if he was someone you’d known all your life. Especially if he was someone you’d known all your life.

So, to distract yourself, you started changing your paper route to be longer, to take you farther away from the Brooklyn lodging house. You’d get back later, set out earlier. All in all, you spent less time with Spot and more time by yourself, biding your time and pretending you didn’t care about the dark-haired boy you were doing your best to avoid.

However, even if not seeing Spot all the time was doing good things for your little crush, it certainly wasn’t great for him. Spot, who was usually used to meeting up with you after sales were over to talk through rules for the Brooklyn newsies, was suddenly left alone with no idea where you were. As you grew more courageous, venturing out on little trips by yourself to pass the time, he grew more annoyed that you weren’t reporting in to him. Eventually, his smoldering frustration and your overly breezy attitude were bound to clash in a thunderstorm of the century.

Stormy couldn’t even begin to describe it. At first, you had both been civil. He had pulled you aside into a separate room. He had asked you why you weren’t showing up at the lodging house as much, why you were suddenly skipping newsie discussions. You suppose something in his tone had bothered you, something about the fact that he seemed to feel that he could control you, and you had answered him with some sort of snarky retort. This, when Spot had been wanting a legitimate response, was the last straw.

It quickly escalated from there until you were practically shouting at each other. Why were you so afraid of responsibility? Why did Spot think he could order you around like a doll? Why were you making such a big deal out of this? Why was he? Everything came to a peak when Spot had raked his hand through his hair, clearly vexed. “You know, you’re skipping out on us so much I don’t even think we need you here.” He had said, and you had frozen mid-pace.

“Are you telling me to leave?” You had asked, voice icy calm. Spot had looked over at you, and even from across the room you could sense the regret already building in him, the knowledge that he had gone too far. But Spot was still Spot Conlon, King of Brooklyn, and so he would never back down. “I guess I am.” He had stared at you, chin held high, issuing a silent challenge. He wasn’t the only one with a Brooklyn temper, so you returned his gaze. “Then this is goodbye.” You had jerked your chin at him in a silent farewell, then spun around and headed for the door. Just as you were about to disappear completely, you saw his hand reach out to stop you, but it was too late, and you hurried away from him.

You had left Brooklyn that night, gathering up your few belongings in a fit of fury and leaving the lodging house behind. You had whispered a couple of last-minute goodbyes to your newsie friends in Brooklyn, then disappeared into the streets. You weren’t quite sure where you were going, only that it had to be away. Somewhere Spot wouldn’t find you, although you knew that the chances of him searching for you were slim to none. So, you suppose that you weren’t quite surprised when you looked up and found yourself walking through Manhattan- Jack Kelly’s turf. Well, if there’s one place Spot won’t want to go, it is here.

Luckily for you, not many of the Manhattan newsies recognized you. If there were any dealings with Brooklyn, they would usually have met with Spot instead of you, so you were just another stranger to them. You had walked through the door of the Manhattan lodging house, making your way through the throngs of boys to reach Jack Kelly. He had recognized you slightly, judging by his furrowed brow, but you had been quick to assure him that it was only because you used to be a Brooklyn newsie and had left due to a little dispute with Spot. Understatement of the century, but it would keep your cover and explain away any misgivings.

Jack had welcomed you with open arms, and you found a new home with the Manhattan newsies. It was a perfectly fine life, and you still kept selling papes as free as a bird just like you had always wanted, but something was still missing. You noticed it when you headed back to the lodging house and looked for a familiar face that wasn’t there, or when you looked out the window at night and saw a cityscape that just wasn’t quite right. You missed Brooklyn, and there was no way around it.

As much as you missed your home, you knew there was no chance that you’d go back. If there’s one thing you and Spot had in common, it’s that you had a fearsome pride that you would never be able to fully control. You couldn’t imagine walking back through those streets, and to do what? Beg Spot to let you stay? Not in a million years. It’s the same reason why Spot won’t be knocking on the door of the Manhattan lodging house to ask you to come back home with him. He would never admit that he was wrong, and certainly not in front of Jack and all of the ‘Hattan newsies.

So you stay in Manhattan, and watch the sun rise and set over and over again. Days grow old, become weeks. Soon it’s been a month, then two, then half a year. You miss Spot with every sunrise, but it doesn’t matter. You two had always been able to hold a grudge, and that’s exactly what you’ll be doing, probably for the rest of your life. There was just no other way.

You’ve finished selling your papes early. One of the nice things about Manhattan is that they’re not quite used to a girl newsie, and you’re able to get through all of your papers in much shorter time than back home in Brooklyn. So, you wander back through the twisting street corners to the Manhattan lodging house, joined soon after by Race, Elmer, Albert, Specs, and a few other boys.

This mangy group is lying around in the main room of the lodging house when Jack leans in the doorway, pretending to knock on the doorframe. “Hey, Racer, Specs, Y/N, you guys busy? I need a couple of newsies to head down to Spot Conlon’s turf. Them Brooklyn boys are causing some trouble in our zone and I need him to knock it off.” You sit up the second you hear Spot’s name. “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea, Jack. You remember why I came here, right? Spot hates me.”

Jack waves a hand dismissively. “Actually, you said that you were good friends until one measly little argument. I need you there to make sure the other boys don’t get they asses kicked by the Brooklyn guys.” Race and Specs stand up, joining you in the squabble. Their voices ring out over yours, fiercely declaring that they could take a dozen Brooklyn boys ten to one and come out on top.

You laugh in spite of yourself, and Jack takes that as a cue that you agree with him. “Great to see you so happy, Y/N. Now come on, it’ll be a short trip. See you later.” He ducks out of the room before you can either argue back or hit him with something, so you’re forced to turn to Specs and Race. “So, how do you feel about a walk to Brooklyn?”

It feels strange to be heading back to your old turf. Jack had assured you that you’d only be there briefly to keep the Brooklyn boys off of Race and Specs, and you wouldn’t have to talk to Spot at all. So, you keep your newsie cap wedged firmly down on your head, and do your best to disguise your face. You don’t want to be here, not at all, but you can’t risk getting kicked out of Manhattan as well. You can only join so many turfs before you run out of places to sell your papes. And then what would you do, go transcontinental?

The walk to the Brooklyn lodging house happens without incident, and you’re almost feeling like you didn’t need to come at all until you’re a few blocks away. Race and Specs are walking down the road when a figure melts out of the shadows of an alleyway and comes to stand in front of them, blocking their path. He folds his arms across his chest. “And what would a couple of ‘Hattan newsies be doing in our turf?” Race is about to issue back some sarcastic jibe when three more Brooklyn boys appear out of nowhere.

You can see this is going south, so you walk up to the boys. You’d been trailing Race and Specs by a block or so in the hopes that you wouldn’t be needed, but all eyes turn to you once you approach the gathered newsies. The lead Brooklyn boy squints at you. “Who are you? Another Manhattan kid?” You reach up and pull your hat back, grinning at your friend. “What, you forget me that quickly? I’se only been gone a couple of months.”

He recognizes you at once. “Y/N? That you?” The boy slings an arm around your shoulder. “You should have told us these kids were with you.” You laugh, gesturing for Race and Specs to continue on to the lodging house. “I didn’t think you were that excited for a fight. They’d been here barely a minute.” The two of you break into chuckles, but your laugh dies in your throat when you see a familiar figure approaching from further down the street. He calls out to the Brooklyn boy next to you. “Hey, what’s all this? I’ve said no commotion in the streets.” Then Spot turns to you, and his gaze turns stony from the second his eyes land on you.

Neither of you say a word. Specs, noticing the obvious unease circling between the two of you, steps forward. “We’re here with word from Jack Kelly. There are a few things we’se got to discuss.” Spot looks over at him, distracted, and idly gestures for the three of you to follow him back to the lodging house. You walk over to Specs and whisper a quiet thank-you to the newsie. He just brushes it off. “Trust me, it was more for me than you. I didn’t want to see you get killed this soon into entering Brooklyn.” You force a smile, but inside, your mind is reeling. You had hoped that Spot would at least look a little happy to see you, like he regrets sending you away, but you didn’t see anything but ice in his eyes.

The three of you push through the doors of the lodging house, and head down the hall to Spot’s office of sorts. You already know the way, having been there many times before, and so you’re the first one in the room. Race and Specs are about to follow you through the door, but Spot reaches out an arm and blocks their path. “I’m going to talk with her first. You can wait in the main room.” You trade gazes with the Manhattan newsies, and nod silently to indicate that everything is alright. As you watch them disappear back down the hall, you’re not quite sure whether that was the truth.

Spot waits for them to go, then shuts the door. He walks back to the center of the room, folding his arms over his chest. You’ve seen this movement many times before, but usually the object of his stone-cold stare is some unfortunate newsboy, not the girl he’s known for his entire life. Spot is the first one to speak. “What are you doing here?” His voice is quiet. You’re not used to hearing it so quiet.

You clear your throat. “Jack asked me to go with the boys. He wants to talk about-” Spot cuts you off. “I don’t care about Jack Kelly. Why are you back here?” Despite everything, despite all the time you’ve spent wishing you could be back in Brooklyn, you still feel that familiar burn of annoyance rising in the back of your throat. “Would you prefer I leave? I seem to remember you were the one to kick me out in the first place.” The sounds of the city echo in through an open window. Spot glances out at the city below, then back to you.

“As I recall, you were the one who dared me to make you leave.” Your eyes fly to him. “That’s not true at all! Yeah, we were arguing, but I’m not the one who said that I wasn’t needed. That you didn’t want me here.” Spot takes a step forward, and even this slight closeness makes your breath hitch in your throat. “I never wanted you to go. I know what I said, and I know what happened, but I never wanted you to leave. I regretted it ever since.”

You nod slowly, finding you can’t quite look him in the eyes. You glance away, towards the open window. Anything but the pain clear on Spot’s face, the pain that twists in you like a knife. “I missed it too. All of this.” You wait one moment, two. “I missed you.” Spot reaches out and presses his hand gently to the side of your cheek, forcing you to look back at him. “Come back to me. Please. I never should have said any of that and we both know it.” You look at him for a long time, silently weighing everything, then nod. Instantly, Spot’s face brightens. “Well, if we’re making chancy decisions, I might as well do this.” You tilt your head slightly, confused, then your eyes widen when he presses a kiss to your lips. You smile and kiss him back, but the moment is shattered when one of the Brooklyn newsies yells something from out in the hall.

“Hey, Spot, can you hear out these ‘Hattan guys? One of them keeps stealing Jasper’s cigars.” Spot groans, reluctantly pulling away. “I’m going to kill them before they even start talking.” You laugh at his annoyed expression. “You are not.” Spot raises an eyebrow. “And who’s going to stop me?” You smile at him. “Me.” You lean over, kissing him lightly, then dance away and reach for the door despite Spot’s protests, which you ignore gleefully. You have Spot back, what more could anything else matter?

#newsies #spot conlon #spot conlon imagine #spot conlon x reader #spot conlon imagines #spot conlon oneshot #newsies imagine #newsies x reader #newsies imagines #newsies oneshot #newsies live imagine #newsies live x reader #newsies live imagines #newsies live oneshot #brooklyn newsies #brooklyn newsies imagine #brooklyn newsies x reader #brooklyn newsies imagines #brooklyn newsies oneshot

177 notes · View notes

callivich · 3 years

Text

I love the idea of time travel and I just couldn’t get this idea out of my head, so here’s a little time travel story! Reworked this so it’s slightly different and longer! Planning on a part two soon.....

———

Ian had been standing in the kitchen of his and Mickey’s new apartment. He had been about to make some coffee and take it to his husband who was still sleeping. Everything had been normal and fine - he’d been idly thinking about what they were going to do that day. It was Saturday and Mickey had, the night before, demanded not to be woken early, but other than that, they had no plans. Maybe a dip in the pool? It was sunny, but not too warm, which was good because the slightly cool weather meant less people in the pool.

And, just as he was imagining swimming lazily in an empty pool with his husband, it seemed like he blinked and the whole world had shifted sharply. He felt dizzy and his vision swam, his body felt weak and he collapsed against a nearby wall, trying to catch his breath. It was like no feeling he’d ever experienced.

Blinking furiously, he noticed something alarming - he was not leaning against his kitchen wall, he was somewhere else. Somewhere he never thought he’d ever go again. Somewhere it was impossible to go again, but he recognised it immediately. The Milkovich house. He glanced around at his surroundings, struggling to understand how he could be standing outside Mickey’s old bedroom. What the fuck?? Was he dreaming? Or, worse, hallucinating? If he was dreaming or hallucinating, it was the most realistic thing he had ever experienced, there was nothing dreamlike about it. Everything looked exactly the same as he remembered - the signs on Mickey’s door, the dirt covered carpet, the dimly lit hallway - it even smelled the same - that stale mixture of smoke, beer and sweat.

It was too much - this situation he found himself in, it couldn’t be real, and yet, apparently it was. He felt a sharp burst of panic, his chest felt tight, and he reflexively clenched his hands, trying to calm himself. It was then he realised he was holding something. It was heavy and solid in his hand, and as he stared at it, it took him a few seconds to understand what he was seeing - it was a tire iron. And then everything began to click into place - he noted his worn, hand-me-down clothes and when he reached up to feel his hair with his free hand, his fingers found bangs. An overwhelming feeling of familiarity washed over him, he remembered these clothes, he remembered holding the tire iron and he remembered why he was holding the tire iron. Most importantly, he remembered this day. It was the day that everything changed between him and Mickey - the stolen gun, the fight, the sex - and he was in his teenage body. Shit.

Ian didn’t know what to do. This was impossible. There was simply no way it was possible. And yet, here he stood, years in the past. His mind began to race with possibilities - should he leave? and go where? back to the Gallagher house? or should he stay here and wait to see what happens? would anything happen? would he blink and be back in his kitchen? or was he stuck here in the past forever? He wanted to go home, to his apartment with Mickey, he wanted his husband. Mickey. A thought occurred to him - maybe Mickey, his Mickey, was here too? Not that would automatically fix everything, but at least Ian wouldn’t be alone. He stared at the door, he needed to know either way - either Mickey was also, somehow, here in the past, and they could figure this out together, or he was about to run into angry, teenage Mickey, who perhaps didn’t hate Ian as much as Ian had assumed at the time, but was definitely not his friend.

He paused outside the door, and as he took a deep breath, his hand tightened on the tire iron - unsure if he should just leave it on the floor. He definitely wasn’t going to hit Mickey with it, but if it was teenage Mickey in there, then Ian hoped the sight of the tire iron would stop Mickey from hitting him. Ian pushed open the door, and softly shut it behind him with a click. There was Mickey, laid out on the bed, face down, asleep, just as Ian remembered. It was bizarre seeing this again, at the time he had no idea how this day would change his life, but here it was - the moment that their lives began to become entwined.

This wasn’t the time to reminisce though. Ian gently, much more gently than he had done so originally, poked Mickey in the back with the end of the tire iron. Perhaps too gently, because Mickey didn’t move. This was promising - teenage Mickey was a light sleeper, but in the safety of their apartment, adult Mickey had began to sleep heavily, and Ian hoped that the fact Mickey didn’t move immediately meant that this was his husband.

“Mickey. Wake up.” Ian moved closer to the bed, and tapped him on the back with his free hand.

That did it, there was an annoyed groan, and Mickey turned his head, so Ian could now see his dirt-smudged face, but didn’t open his eyes, only muttering a tired, “No.” This was different to what had happened before, but Ian still wasn’t sure if this was his Mickey or teenage Mickey.

“Wake up.” Ian tried again, this time giving his shoulder a shake.

“Fucks sake, Ian, it’s the weekend....I wanna sleep in.” Mickey mumbled, sleepily. Still, he didn’t open his eyes, just reached out a hand, and when he didn’t feel anything but an empty space, he continued, “Come back to bed.”

It seemed like Mickey thought Ian should be in bed with him, and relief flooded through Ian. This was his Mickey! Now he just needed to actually wake the fuck up.

Feeling more confident, he sat down on the bed next to Mickey, dropped the tire iron on the floor, and ran a hand down his back. “Mick. Open your eyes. But don’t freak out.”

“What am I gonna freak -” And then he was speechless. His eyes were finally open and he looked at Ian in shock. “What the fuck?”

“I know.”

Mickey’s eyes darted around the room, back to Ian, down at himself, and then settled on Ian. He reached a hand out to touch Ian’s face softly, running his fingers over the freckles. “Fuck. What’s going on? How...”

“I don’t know?! I was in the kitchen, I was going to make coffee, and then suddenly I was here and shit, I thought I was dreaming, or hallucinating, but this is all so real. So it must be real?” The words tumbled out and Ian was so glad that he wasn’t going to have to deal with this alone.

“I don’t....the last thing I remember was going to bed with you.” Mickey sat up, and swung his legs around to sit close to Ian. “This is fucked up. It’s fucking impossible.” He ran a hand down his face, before turning to stare at Ian again in disbelief. And Ian couldn’t help but do the same back - he still couldn’t believe his eyes.

“What are we going to do?” Ian broke the silence, they couldn’t sit here staring at each other all day.

“Shit. I don’t fucking know.” Mickey frowned for a moment, as if considering something and then pinched Ian on the arm.

“Ow! What was that for?”

“In case it’s a dream.”

“You’re supposed to pinch yourself.” Ian grumbled, as he pinched Mickey on the arm. “There. Feel real?”

“Hardly felt that, but yeah.” He looked around his room. “So, I guess we’re in the past. That means -”

Mickey didn’t have time to finish his sentence because the door opened and a ghost entered. Or rather, not a ghost, someone who was very much alive. Terry. Mickey instantly tensed up, his hands balling into fists. Terry made his way into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. Ian didn’t think, he just pulled Mickey close, hugging him tight.

“Fuck. Shit.” Mickey let out a shuddering breath. “Ian, we can’t.” He moved away reluctantly. Ian felt his heart clench but nodded, shifting away to the end of the bed. Of course they couldn’t hug, not here, not now. Fuck. Ian wanted to punch the wall. Mickey pinched the bridge of his nose, “I can’t fucking be here, man.” He jumped up and threw on some more clothes and some shoes.

Terry stumbled back out of the bathroom, and Mickey froze, his eyes wide, still unbelieving of what he was seeing. He kept staring at the door after Terry left. It was surreal seeing Terry alive, walking around like normal. And if Ian thought it was surreal, he couldn’t imagine what Mickey was thinking. Or rather, he probably could guess. His mind drifted to thoughts of Monica - she was alive here, what would it be like to see her again? Would he felt strange? Horrified? Upset? And Frank....shit, Frank had only just died, but right now, he was alive.

He pushed the thoughts away, they needed to leave. This was all too confusing. Mickey had only just finally come to terms with Terry’s death and this....this fucked up situation was only going to cause him pain. And Ian was still going through some pretty strange and surprisingly upsetting emotions about Frank’s death, it was all still so raw. Neither of them needed to be confronted by their dead fathers (did anyone ever?), especially not so close to said fathers deaths. The room felt too small, too hot, Ian knew they needed to leave. It was impossible to think here.

“Let’s get out of here.” Ian tugged on Mickey’s hand, squeezing it gently, before dropping it.

“Where?” Mickey questioned, shrugging on a coat.

“One of the abandoned buildings? At least then we know we’ll be alone. And we can try and figure out what we’re going to do.”

Mickey gave a whispered “yeah” and flung open his bedroom door, hurrying towards the front of the house, causing Ian to jog behind him to catch up. He was about to reach him when Mandy appeared. Ian’s stomach did a pleasant flip when he saw her - he’d missed her so much and here she was, looking exactly the same as he remembered. He fought the urge to hug her tightly.

“Ian? Are you ok?” Her eyes searched his face curiously, like she could tell something was wrong. But that was stupid, Ian thought, even if she could, she would never guess it was that Ian and Mickey had somehow time travelled from the present back to the future.

“Uh...yeah. I just...” He couldn’t help it - he glanced at Mickey who had paused by the front door, looking over his shoulder at Ian. “I gotta go home.”

“Ok. But-”

“Everything’s fine, Mandy. I’ll see ya.” He could hear the tremble in his voice and he could tell from the slight frown on her face that she was concerned. She looked back and forth between Ian and Mickey, her eyes narrowing and noticing Mickey’s hand on the door. “Where are you going, shithead?”

“Out.” And with that, Mickey practically flung himself through the doorway and made his way onto the sidewalk. Ian waved a hand in Mandy’s direction, wishing he could explain to her but knowing he couldn’t, and headed out, shutting the door behind him. He felt guilty brushing her off, but Mickey was his priority.

“Mick.” He called out as he caught up. He bumped his shoulder against Mickey’s and they began to make their way to one of the more isolated abandoned buildings, both knowing which one they should go to. They walked in silence, both of them struggling to make sense of where, and when, they found themselves. So, it was no surprise that neither of them noticed the figure that followed them.

——

Ian watched Mickey as he climbed the old, battered stairs in front of him, he could see the heavy tension in his shoulders. It was familiar but not something he had seen in awhile. Mickey was relaxed and happy, most of the time, they were finally settling into the West Side and things were good - safe and stable - and their days were filled with kisses and laughter, they just were enjoying being together. But, now, they had been thrown backwards to a time when things were dangerous and unstable and complicated.

There was a splintered door, which Mickey kicked open with his foot. He sighed heavily and Ian grasped his hand, leading him towards one of the walls. They sunk down onto the floor, backs against the cold brick. Ian moved to cuddle Mickey close, but it was awkward. He was used to being able to hold Mickey easily, but here, now, as they were a similar height, it was different. He had never had the luxury of being able to hug or be close to Mickey like this back then, so he wasn’t used to trying to hold him like this. Eventually, with some fumbling, they managed to find a good angle. Mickey slumped down a bit, and Ian put his arm around Mickey’s shoulders, they were pressed close, and Mickey threw one leg over Ian’s, and rested his head close to Ian’s neck.

“This isn’t fucking fair.” Mickey whispered. “What the fuck is this shit and why is it happening to us?”

“I’m scared.” Ian replied, using his free hand to grab one of Mickey’s. “What if we’re stuck here?”

“Your meds.” Mickey squeezed Ian’s hand. “What are we going to do about your meds?”

“I don’t....” Ian faltered. He hadn’t even considered that. What was he going to do? He hadn’t been diagnosed back then, now, so what did that mean in terms of his illness? The fear that had been bubbling under the surface suddenly began to overflow. What the fuck was he going to do? “I don’t know. Shit. Mick. I don’t-”

“We’ll figure it out.” Mickey put his free hand on top of his and Ian’s clasped ones. Ian wanted to believe Mickey but he didn’t feel convinced, and as confident as Mickey sounded, Ian could hear the worry.

“Ok. Yeah. We’ll figure it out. But, what are we going to do, like right now? We can’t stay here tonight.”

“I can’t go back there. I can’t see-”

“I know. I know. We’ll stay at my house.” Ian cut him off before he could say his father’s name. It felt strange saying that - my house - because it wasn’t, not anymore. His house, his home, was the apartment he shared with Mickey.

“And how the fuck do we explain that? And what about Frank? You gonna be able to deal with seeing him again?”

“Don’t care.” He heard Mickey snort. “I don’t care Mick, you’re my fucking husband, and I love you and we need to-”

“Holy fucking shit! What the hell is this?” A shocked voice cut through the air, startling both of them.

Ian and Mickey jerked their heads up at the same time to see Mandy standing in the doorway, a look of complete and utter disbelief on her face. They had been so wrapped up in their problem, that they hadn’t noticed her following them or heard her making her way up the steps of the building. They slowly disentangled from each other in a way that Ian noted would not have happened in their teenage years. Mickey would have shoved Ian off back then, but now, he was so used to not hiding or feeling afraid that he didn’t. As much as Ian would like to focus on the growth Mickey was showing, he knew he couldn’t. Because right now, the stakes were too high.

Ian’s heart pounded, he knew they needed to say something. He could trust Mandy. He had done so before. But fuck, there was so much more he knew in hindsight. So many more terrible, violent things that he knew he could not let any of them go through again.

Which is why he blurted out the first thing he thought of, “It’s cold. We were cold, so we were just warming up.”

Ian didn’t need to look at Mickey to know he was probably rolling his eyes.

“Cold?” Mandy folded her arms and leaned against the wall. “Thank fuck I’m not a cop Ian because you would not last-”

“What the fuck are you doing here? You follow us?” Mickey interrupted. “Go away.”

“No. Not until you tell me what’s going on.” Mandy pushed off the wall and walked to towards them. “Ian, what’s going on? I thought you and Kash-”

“Fuck him.”

“Shut up, Mickey. I’m talking to Ian.”

“Mandy, please. This isn’t what it.....can you just forget you came here? Please? And please don’t say anything. To anyone.” Ian pleaded. He needed her to go. He loved her, and he loved seeing her again, but fuck, this was not the time. He couldn’t think with her here. All he kept thinking of was when Terry found him and Mickey - that horrible morning that always made his stomach churn when he thought about it. He didn’t think Mandy would tell. But in that moment it felt like it was too much - someone else knowing - he just couldn’t handle it right now. He just wanted to be with Mickey. “I’m begging you, Mandy. Please.”

Mandy bit her lip, in the same way Ian had seen Mickey do a thousand times. She looked back and forth between them, uneasy and suspicious, Ian realised he had tears in his eyes and he could see the exact moment Mandy noticed. “Fine. But you owe me an explanation Ian. And so do you Mickey.”

“Yes.” Ian breathed in relief. And he watched her turn on her heel and leave. They stood in silence until they were sure she was gone.

“So, what now?” Mickey pulled Ian close, his arms winding around his waist.

“Maybe if we fall asleep, we’ll wake up back home?” Ian hoped more than anything that would be true.

“Thought you were awake when you came here. Back? Now? Whatever.”

“I was but....who the fuck knows right? It’s worth a try.”

“Yeah. Maybe. But we can’t sleep here.”

#gallavich #gallavich fic #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #shameless #headcanon #as always feel free to continue this or add to it!!#I think this idea would be great written by someone who is good at multi-chapter fics #I’m not great at that #so very happy if anyone wants to take this idea and do their own thing with it #or remix it or use parts of it #btw sorry but I’m probably not going to continue this #but they definitely get home safely

116 notes · View notes

marvelous-space-nerd · 3 years

Text

My dearest Bee

Hi dear tumblr people! I wrote a thing and I quite like it,,

Summary: Time travel, is, well something. Who would've thought that you would get stuck in the 1800's?? Well here you are, part of the Van der Linde gang, ready to face the past.

First chapter can be read as a stand alone chapter. It takes place a few years after Isaac died. The relationship between the reader and Arthur is platonic. Enjoy!!

ao3

My dearest Bee,

So I hope these letters- I can’t call them letters if they’re in a book right?- Anyways, I hope these will find you, I hope you’re home, safe. I hope you saw your dog again, I miss her. I have a horse now though! Maybe I’ll name her after you, or just wasp. If I remember correctly you weren’t the biggest fan of wasps. But really, I’m not sure if we timetraveld or were transported to another universe where everything just started like 100 years later, the latter case making it a whole lot harder for you to find this. I just really hope you’ll find this against all odds, because I said I’d write to you if I made it. And I did! I guess. After the whole thing blew up some cowboys found me, I think they call themselves the Van der Linde gang? But yeah, they feed me and gave me a bed for the small price of doing some chores. I’d like to do more though, did you know that the 1800’s are really boring even though you can die at any second? It’s spicy but in the wrong way. I’d like you to know though that it’s not all bad here. People are lovely when they’re not trying to shoot you. You should see a campfire evening- hell any evening- here.

Yours always,

(Y/N)

“(Y/N) get off your lazy ass and do the chores we asked you to do!”

“Mister Morgan! No need to yell, I got it perfectly under control. I was just, taking a break, that's all. Everyone who works all day has the right to take a break.”

“Boy as much as we want it workers are exploited ‘till they fall to the ground face first. You however are not so-” He took a deep breath, closed his eyes before speaking agian. Softer this time than the louder tone he was using first. “get to work, please.”

“Fine fine, but-”

“There better leave something good out of that big mouth of yours.”

“Hey that's just rude! But I want one of you lot to teach me anything. I can’t even ride a horse for Christ's sake.”

“I still don’t get how you can’t kiddo.”

“I told you I lost my memory at the explosion, maybe I lost my skills too.” You said avoiding his piercing gaze. Nothing is better at covering up lies than staring at rocks being sad over the skills you’ve lost.

“And we all know about that blatant lie.” Fuck, maybe rocks aren’t good at covering up.

“It isn’t-”

“Boy I don’t give a damn, you could work on your handwriting though, you’re almost worse than John. But fine, when you’re done with your chores I'll teach you to ride.” He said, finally giving in.

“Yay!” You said while doing little hand clapping motion. “I won’t disappoint, I promise. I’m a fast learner!” You said with smiling eyes

“And how’d you find out you were a fast learner boy?” He spoke out as he raised his eyebrows, just enough for you to feel them piercing right through you, poking at all the holes in your lie. You thought you’d last at least a few months, well here you are, exactly one month deep in this shithole being caught red handed.

“Fuck” Is all you managed to cram out while your eyes lost all their focus. You being back in your own mind instead of the wild world.

It made the silence hard. The only sound that of the other gang members and the birds and the bees to give you something to focus on. It’s so hard out here, no amount of scouts will ever prepare one for the real wild.vIt’s much scarier out here. The real wild is the place where you die if you trip over the wrong rock. The scouts will make sure the rock isn’t even there. Every bird will just put down another rock and god I want the silence broken, just as broken as my lie is.

“I know there’s probably a reason you’re not telling us anything.” Athur said, as he moved closer, his eyes smaller. Like they could see right in his head “You can’t hide forever, not who you are.”

“...”

“Use your words boy”

“I’m sorry, Mister Morgan, I don’t know what to say to that.”

“You’ll figure it out, but first geT your ass back to woRK.” His voice became louder this time, I mean this was the third time he asked. He put his hand on your shoulder, shoving you away from your shared tent towards the hay bales you were supposed to move. A bit harder than anyone in the twenty-first century would’ve done, but for Arthur it was just a friendly push.

“I will, I will mister Morgan!” You said trying to act cheerful. Arthur made a “tsk” sound and waved you off, absolutely done, it seemed. You moved to the hay bales that were still in the wagon, ready to be fed to the horses.

The hay bales were heavy, yet they seemed lighter than they were a month ago. Your hands weren’t soft no more and being covered in dirt and dust wasn’t rare anymore. The luxuries that the modern world gave you disappeared the moment you decided that Bee was the one who should go home. One to run to the portal the moment it opens, one to pull the lever and jump through afterwards. Both of you knew that people don’t want you touching their stuff, let alone interdimensional portals or time machines. You knew someone would be quick to show up the moment you turned it on. It was surprising to see the portal become unstable, blinking in and out, in and out of existence. It left you with 2 choices. Option a: jump in it praying it would still transport you back home, back to all you knew not leaving you in the empty pocket of a closed portal. Or option b: run away for the inevitable explosion.

Gods you hated thinking about it. It played and twisted your mind. You couldn’t even talk about it, no accessible therapists in the wild west. And you’d prefer not to tell anyone you’re a helpless time traveler. Stuck in 1895 traveling with a gang of outlaws. A surely unique situation only you could get yourself in. You don’t even remember what you chose. You just remembered waking up surrounded by a bunch of cowboys.

“And how is our newest member doing?” The man's smooth and easy voice was easily recognizable. Dutch Van der Linde. Isn’t it ironic that he has a dutch surname and that his parents called him, well, Dutch. It’s a question that always on your mind, why his parents did that and if it’s iconic or just stupid. Dutch was one of the first people who introduced himself, right after Arthur- who was very inclined on being called Mister Morgan- and Hosea. The trio who showed you the wild west wasn’t all bad.

“Dutch! It is absolutely lovely to see you.” You said while putting the last hay bale down. A little bit of healthy sweat decorating your face. “I am doing absolutely great. Arthur- Mister Morgan is actually going to teach me how to ride a horse when I’m done.” You said while eyeing Arthur. Clearly not being amused with the situation. “Eh, he said yes, it’s his problem now.”

“I’m surprised you got through that thick skull of his!” He said with a smile, each word a little louder than the last. He clapped his hand on your shoulder as he let out a little chuckle.

“I think he likes me even though he won’t admit it actually.” You lied, confidence was half of the battle, as they say.

“I think I don’t you annoying little bastard.” Arthur said, joining the conversation. Dutch clearly talks loud enough to make sure any gossip subject will show up to the gossip. Definitely not the fact that you made eye contact with him “Now get to your horse before I change my mind.”

“Arthur! Oh shit- Mister Morgan! I’ll be there before they can even give me a speeding ticket” You said, maybe it was a bit too modern this time, but isn’t the wild west about living on the edge?

“You speak a strange version of english boy.” Arthur said. “You know how to saddle up a horse right?”

“Hosea taught me so I could help around with chores. And Wasp already had a saddle when we found her so I’m all good to go Mister Morgan!”

“Great, now go get her saddled up so we can go.” He said, motioning towards the horses.

“See you in a flash.” You said while snapping your fingers, forming finger guns to point back to Arthur. You dismissed the look of confusion on their faces, clearly not used to the finger gun motion. You walked off to Wasp and gave her a little pet and a snack. As you were putting her saddle on you overheard the rest of the conversation between Arthur and Dutch.

“We can both see you have a soft spot for the boy, Arthur.” Dutch said with a chuckle.

“And we both know youngins have great hearing and that he’s spying on our little conversation.” Arthur said in response, eyeing you. You kept saddling Wasp up as if you heard nothing. Let the deaf chicken inside of you arise and all. Hoping they’d say more.

“I know Arthur, I know.” Dutch said with a chuckle. About to walk away. “Oh before you go, he��s a kid Arthur, don’t be too hard on him and be carefull.” You didn’t think you were a kid, maybe not a full grown adult, but at least you were half an adult, no kid. But you weren’t going to say anything, you were eavesdropping after all. “He’s all yours, (Y/N)!” He yelled at you, before leaving for real. You turned around and gave him a smile and a quick wave. Arthur walked

“Take her by the reins, we're walking to an open spot first.”

“Shoar '' You said, absolutely trying to mimic the western accent you hear all around here. Apparently it was just bad enough to make Arthur chuckle.

“We’ll make a cowboy outta ya yet.”

Traveling in the wild was absolutely amazing for the most part. Abandoned camps are in fact disgusting. They leave their trash! And it’s not like they cleaned their cans so it smells. But besides that the mostly untouched nature was beautiful and the air was so clean. It all felt much more, how to put it, real. No factories everywhere, no house on every corner of the street, just, the world how mother nature intended it. It was peaceful. There was an open field about ten minutes walking from camp, and that’s where you arrived. Reins in hand.

“You ready to go (Y/N)?” Arthur asked. You put your hand on your hips looking at your horse with abosute pride and stupidity because how to fuck were you going to do this?

“Absolutely.” You said. “Remind me how do I get on again?”

The words were taken by the wind as they made room for silence. Arthur’s expression could be described as a mix between surprise, disbelief and the OhMyGodAreYouStupid emotion. Yet it all quickly made room for a smile, or a laugh. He could definitely be laughing at you.

“I didn’t expect to need to teach an 18 year old how to get on a damn horse.”

There was no fire behind the words, but as they say, fight (fake) fire with (fake) fire.

“And I didn’t expect to end up here for the life of so I did not think horse riding would be a viable skill to know. So get your pretty ass in the saddle so I can.. mimic you or something.” You said making a hand gesture at Arthur’s horse.

He gave you one more smile as he turned to his horse, getting on slower than usual. He got on on the right side of his horse so he put his right foot in the styrup. He lifted his body up effortlessly and as elegant as a western outlaw could get. And there he was, in the saddle, in full western glory.

“Looks easy enough.” You said, an absolute lie as it turned out. The stirrups were way higher than expected, and the getting on could be called anything but elegant or the cool western movies you saw. Turns out your own body is heavy and there’s quite a lot on a horse to get stuck behind. But you ended up in the saddle, full western glory.

The rest of the riding lesson went about the same. Arthur did something really cool looking and whenever you did it it felt like you were some old slime blob.

“Squeeze your lower legs to get her to move, (Y/N)!”

“I am this horse is just broken- OHMYGOD SHe’s moving!”

“Never blame the horse for the rider's lack of skill, boy. Now steering.”

He explained it all to you. How to properly hold the reins and how to use them, how to do it with one hand and how to do it with two. Western and English style he called it. He taught you how to move your horse around and what not to do. The one and most important thing being to have no doubts and no fear. The horse will sense it.

It felt odd at first, to have control over another living being. It wasn’t easy no, Arthur had to tell you how to correct your posture every 5 minutes. But after a while of correcting everything you started to get confident. It started getting easier to steer. Every muscle of yours was getting tired but it was so worth it. Maybe one day you’ll look like an actual movie star.

Once you got the basics down you could go a bit harder. From a walk to a trot, a canter and even a little gallop. And as the wind brushed over your face blowing your hair away, it felt like something the 21st century didn’t have a lot of. Galloping through the grass hearing every step as more and more grass was thrown into the air. Arthur still giving you instructions on what to watch out for, riding by your side in case of emergency. And the horse, Wasp, god she deserved a cooler name. Her big strong muscles moving beneath you, her breath as she was running, the heat radiating from her skin, gods it felt so great. No modern bike or car could ever top this feeling of freedom.

Cars and bikes could however top the feeling of falling off. You lost control quite a few times, losing balance, a rearing horse throwing you right where you belong. But nothing modern could beat that feeling of getting on again. Of it working when you tried it for a second time. Hell, maybe the third time. Arthur was there to make sure you were okay, and you could have another go. And another. And just one more for good measure. Lying on the ground trying to see if this time you did break something wasn’t a strange thing after today. Hell it happened at least every hour. But determining it as fine and getting on again, it felt like a lot.

You didn’t even realize it was getting late until the sky started turning orange. The normally so bright sun started becoming more yellow and stopped burning at your eyes. Instead it just seemed pretty. The clouds became yellow just like the sun, and the sky turned a bit darker with every passing minute. Yellow and orange were happy colours, maybe this was an good omen, maybe, just maybe, you wouldn’t think you’d die somewhere in a ditch. Bee would be proud to see you haven’t given up. You knew that for once.

“Time isn’t a real thing Mister Morgan, I swear.” You said looking at the sunset.

“Call me Arthur.” Said Arthur Morgan, though guy in the west in dire need of respect. Arthur “You call me mister Morgan boy” Morgan.

“Wait, did someone hide weed somewhere because this must be a hallucination! Can I really call you Arthur?”

“Wouldn't have said it otherwise boy.” He hissed, the mister Morgan just wouldn't leave Arthur.

“Well, Arthur, thank you. I’m happy I only have to say half the syllables now.”

“Shoar thing. Now let’s go back to camp before they send out a search party to see if you haven’t broken anything today.” He said jokingly

“I would never! I am obviously the best horse rider in the entire United states!” You said sarcastically, if you fake confidence long enough, it might become real.

Arthur laughed at that. “Well see about that boy. Now let’s go, we should be there soon considering you can ride now.”

“Of course, good plan. I can show off my skills now!”

“Shoar, go ahead boy. Don’t make your entrance too dramatic.”

“I will, I absolutely will. Oh and Arthur?”

“Hm?” He said, quite relaxed actually.

“Thank you, for everything today. I’m happy you let me bother you today.” You said with a proud smile.

“You’re welcome boy. Bother me all you want, we ain’t getting rid of you just yet.” He said as he ruffled your hair a bit. “Now let’s go home, I’m realll hungry.”

You absolutely couldn’t hide the smile on your face. “Hell yeah, I’m starving.” You said as you kicked the stirrups making Wasp move, you rode to camp in the beautiful orange sky. Maybe he did actually care about you, just a little.

Reblogs and comments are always appreciated!

#arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x male reader #BUT LIKE PLATONIC #Idk how else to tag it #sorry hehe #Van der linde gang #pre canon #fluff #dutch van der linde #arthur morgan

99 notes · View notes