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#i love it so goddamn much but it’s objectively a mess
xo-cod · 7 months
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Hiii!! ummm… could u write sth fluffy for Simon w/ his pregnant wife pls it's ok if u can't love your stuff btw❤️
i don't even like babies but i'd give this man everything 😮‍💨😵‍💫😵‍💫 he's so fucking fine 😭
hope you enjoy babe <33 it's rushed i know 😭
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"no. absolutely not. you set that down right now" before you could even breathe, you heard the stern command of your husband right behind you. it was in the same voice he used when he spoke to johnny or gaz, telling them to behave and stop messing about or to the recruits that joined. either way, it was a voice primarily used by ghost. not by simon who was your dearest husband
"si... i can handle this" you sigh, raising a brow as you turn around. he has that frown on his face, creasing his forehead while his lips were set in a straight line. it would've been adorable and had you not been a little annoyed, you might've marvelled at how beautiful simon looked even when he was annoyed
"you're eight months pregnant. the only lifting you need to be doing is taking your arse from the sofa to bed" he swooped in and took the box from you, holding it in his hands as he chuckles softly. he gave you a sweet kiss to your lips, nuzzling your cheek a little
"m'sorry love but you know how i feel about you bending and lifting anythin'. you'll hurt yourself or the baby. i couldn't bear that" he grimaced slightly, shaking his head to rid the thought of any injury to you. your unimpressed face brings a soft chuckle to his lips as he sets down the box on the side, wrapping his arms around your waist as he caressed your swollen belly. his chin rested on your shoulder as he took in how far along you were. and how beautiful this was, the greatest gift you could've ever given him.
he knows the strain this pregnancy is having on your body and every single pain you experience makes his heart ache because he can't get rid of it for you. even with his support and assistance and help, your pains still make him feel so guilty for being the one to do this to you even if you both wanted it. he's a little more clingy during the last trimester of the pregnancy, he almost damn nears having a heart attack when you want to help and carry objects that are a pound heavier.
it's just in simon's nature to care deeply and it doesn't help all the parenting books he's read up on makes him that much more protective over you. still, he doesn't want to overwhelm you so he tries to hold back even if it nearly kills him in doing so.
"you look so goddamn beautiful, lovie" he hummed softly in your ear, his thumb stroking tender circles on your hip whilst he gently rocked you both side to side
"you're just saying that" a soft chuckle leaves your lips and he narrows his eyes a little, amused at your words
"you know i've never lied to you before and i don't intend startin that now. you're beautiful. you're so beautiful to me, baby" he spoke with nothing but pure sincerity in his voice, his dark brown eyes sparkling underneath the living room lights. they're just so expressive, you can't help but lean into him with pure love at how you could've scored such a perfect guy.
it's such a warm intimate moment shared between the two of you, his hand gently rubbing over your baby bump while he holds holds you close. his whole family in his arms <33
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cassiusfen · 7 months
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This isn't my art, (it's made by @ TheHearthFox over on Twitter) but I wanted to make a long post about why this work in particular speaks to me so goddamn much. I think such a massive part of the queer experience -- and also the furry experience -- is about the abstract. This can be seen in so many different aspects of furry "culture," from the concept of fursonas to kink and and other fetish content. You and I will never know what it's like to be a werewolf and transform under the full moon into the form of a big hulking furry beast. However, us furries create art and other works about the idea of it anyway. We never will be able to be our fursonas -- our often idealized and "perfect" versions of ourselves -- and part of that really hurts. It hurts so bad honestly, to the point where I can't quite put it into words. In terms of queer culture, I will never know what it is like to be a cis woman, and that also messes with me a lot. Yet, I'm still trans, my identity can change, I can perceive myself as whatever I damn well please. Identity allows you to shape yourself and the world around you in your own image, even if not everyone can see its beauty.
We have ways to get at least somewhat close to how we feel in our abstraction. VRChat allows you to make an avatar of what ever you want, whether it's your fursona or just an ideal version of you. Hell, it doesn't even have to be you, it could be anyone or anything really. We have a whole industry based around creating big ass costumes that allow people to at least look something like their desired character. But it's not enough. It's never enough. I ain't religious, but sometimes I feel like I've bitten the apple, been kicked out of the garden, and now I'm left to fend for myself with an identity that my physicality will never match. When I made my fursona using an avatar base in vrchat and configured it to match my real world body scales and looked down, I honestly started crying. I take the headset off, and I'm still me. Everyone takes the headset or fursuit off and they're still the body they were given, not what they would choose. Our reality is objective, and there's no way to really change that. We can act like animal people online all day, but the moment that screen shuts off, the moment we walk away, that warm, fuzzy feeling (hehe) fades.
To think abstract is to think beyond what you can normally sense. You will never get to brush the knots out of your fur in the morning, or play with your antennae while anxious (I see you bug people). We can still have those ideas, however. I know I'm on the third goddamn paragraph and I'm just now talking about the artwork I linked but this is an important concept to me. Usually, when I think of the abstract, it feels unreal, "fuzzy" so to speak. However, in HearthFox's piece, the objective reality appears out of focus and pixelated. It feels like even if we are unable to fully embrace the abstract, we can still embrace what we can of it, and bring some sort of color to a world that doesn't feel like it is made for us. The colors being outside of the lines could suggest that our abstract perception is maybe just "painted on" to the world around us, but is that a bad thing? Is it bad to take things in from the world around you, but still look at it all in your own unique way? I think not. This also isn't only about therian identity, or furry identity, or even queer identity -- it's also about neurodivergence. You are never in the wrong for thinking about the world in a way that is viewed as "non-standard" by the rest of the world. If you see yourself as a wolf, bee, fox, bear, raccoon, a fucking plane, it's not a bad thing. We can still identify however we want, and this modern way of looking at identity is the best way for us to embrace the abstract.
Go wild, go fucking stupid. Love yourself, if you're a fox, be a fox, there are ways you can feel that way, even if it's not all of the time. We can fight, we can love, we can still find ways to elation, even if sometimes existence itself feels wrong to you. This work is but one side of abstract thinking. Look at the color the fox has compared to the objective. Look how the fur drapes, how it runs down the body, or how the snout expresses emotion. Sometimes it feels melancholic, but you cannot tell me that trying your absolute damnedest to live your identity doesn't at least bring some color to your otherwise dreary and unfocused world.
Stay safe, love yourself no matter what.
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xsoleil boys x reader || wedding day
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a/n: im bored as hell now guys 😭 im just gonna like post a bunch of headcanon stuff LOL i might post like fanfics, but thats a maybe wwww ALSO ALSO starting to reaaally like the later waves of niji, so ill prob focus on mainly xsoleil, noctyx, iluna, etc. ill dribble in some luxiem from time to time, but like the other waves need attention too 🙌 i might do some of the fem waves, but im not sure how to write those LOL
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HEX HAYWIRE
bro this man's voice makes my brain go haywire
anyways uh
would definitely just be like very happy and stoic during yalls wedding
he'd treat you like his pretty princess/prince
anyways uhhh he would be that kind of romantic person to like take your hand and kiss it once you go to the front
oh my lord, im struggling to find his green flags when all i listen to from his asmrs are the yandere ones
UHM...... i mean like reception would be cute, like he'd dance with you
like beauty and the beast vibes ykkk
help im genuinely struggling w anything thats positive about marrying him 💀
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DOPPIO DROPSCYTHE
AWWW HED BE SMILING AND LIKE EXCITED
LIKE HE WOULD BE WAITING FOR YOU EXCITEDLY AT THE FRONT
i feel like doppio would just be generally so excited and happy hes finally marrying the person he loves so much
he would fix his hair JUST FOR THIS
this is also the only event he will never be late to
oh god he would be so nervous when the ceremony actually starts
like hes worried he'll mess up his parts or someone will object
BUT it probably wont happen and itll be a great wedding!!
reception!doppio would be fucking lit
HE WOULD BE THE LIFE OF THE PARTY
he'd already be making dad jokes even if he isnt a dad yet
i swear, he would be kissing your forehead or cheek every few minutes
oh my goodness, drunk doppio would be so sweet
like i can just imagine him getting tipsy while like the maid of honor and the groomsman doing their little speech things and him getting really emotional
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VER VERMILLION
honestly, i think he would cry at yalls wedding
like, he just screams 'emotionally fragile man on occasion'
the second he sees you in your wedding dress/suit/wtv, he'll start tearing up knowing that yall r gonna be married
and he loves you ya know
he'd hide the fact he was tearing up when you get to the front www
five bucks, doppio would be stifling his laughter when he sees ver crying
reception would be wholesome
ver would be whispering things to you while you guys dance
and not just random things
like i mean in korean
yeah his cute ass voice when he talks in korean
the voice where you want to keel over and throw up because it's really goddamn adorable and kind of attractive because people who speak more than one language is always somewhat attractive
tipsy ver is something to live for
it doesn't always happen but when it does its either hilarious as fuck or really cute and wholesome
like when he gets drunk, there's a 50% chance he starts to emote on the dance floor with an equally drunk doppio
or he could be holding your hand the whole time and staying by your side
a/n: WWWW im sorry i half assed hex's hcs LMAO i just genuinely cant see something that isnt overly explicit or kinky that wouldnt happen on ur wedding so thats why his is like the shortest lmao 💀 errhmm yeah, also ver is my #1 oshi thats why he has like the uh longest one LMAO UHHM yeah whatever lols have a good timezone
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what-gs-watching · 5 months
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“Well…maybe I’ll save you.”
I’M NOT CRYING, YOU’RE CRYING.
Sorry.
I’m not crying, you’re crying.
That’s not much better, is it.
I just finished The Giggle and I’m sobbing over the fact that 10 finally gets everything he was chasing and I am clearly unwell. I knew this episode was going to break me but I didn’t realize how far they were going to push us over the cliff. Like. You don’t get this in Doctor Who, not ever. That’s almost the appeal of it, sometimes. 
But Russell T Davies just ripped out everyone’s heart in the best possible way.  I really can’t.
Blorp. Okay. 
The thing is….the thing is - I think everybody needed that. How satisfying must this be for David Tennant? And Catherine Tate? How are they not fit to bursting right now? That was so beautiful, gang. And they must be so proud.
But I’m gonna focus. Also, didn’t I say catharsis? Jesus christ, you can’t get more than that. I’m pretty sure they hit the fucking limit on catharsis. Wow. I’m a mess.
Focusing, though: wherein the Doctor and Donna have to say humanity from their own terrible base instincts because the Toymaker loves a good game. 
So we open on Soho in 1925 (which, is anyone else wondering where A.Z. Fell & Co is in relationship to the street they’re showing? No? Just me? Okay cool) and we’re taken into a creepy toy shop where we meet Neil Patrick Harris doing a super weird German accent and being a general creep. He sells a dummy to a man who says he needs it for his boss, who is around the corner working on inventing the concept of television broadcasting for the very first time.  
They pop the head off the dummy and leave it in a setup surrounded by a ton of lightbulbs and they go into another room to test it all out - and it works. But the heat from the bulbs is hot, too hot, which is why they needed an object, not an actual person. But of course, the creepy toyseller was obviously up to no good, and as the broadcast continues, the dummy head melts and lets out a terrible little giggle. Clearly, we’re in trouble.
Back in the present, the Doctor and Donna are in the streets of London trying to figure out what’s happening. Some guy argues with 14 who tries to stop him from attacking a car, saying that his taxes pay for the street but he doesn’t drive and he has the right to do whatever he wants with the roadway, thank you. Perfectly sound logic, and the guy is belligerent, saying two days ago everyone in the world decided they were right and wouldn’t listen to reason.  So that’s exciting.
Soon enough, UNIT finds them and they’re told to get Wilf somewhere safe while the Doctor and Donna follow them to headquarters. Where we finally get our eyes on Kate Lethbridge-Stewart who I absolutely love, she’s the “bitches get shit done” Tina Fey gif come to LIFE. Bitch will always be the new black, and that’s Kate, and exactly how she runs UNIT, loading it full of equally brilliant women, including Shirley who we’d met when dealing with The Meep, and Melanie, who was a companion to the 6th Doctor,
Who run the world? GIRLS.
Anyway, we get into explanation mode - two days ago there was a spike in aggression worldwide, the same spike across the board. It’s affecting everyone, even the people in government, but UNIT has a fun device that helps keep everyone wearing one sane. And Kate decides she’s going to demonstrate how fucked up the situation is - she asks them to take her device offline, so they do.
And she proceeds to spew a bunch of terrible things at the Doctor - how he’s an alien with two hearts that have infiltrated them and can’t be trusted, and then she takes shots at poor Shirley who’s in a goddamn wheelchair and it’s really gross to watch, it’s one of the worst parts of humanity and she tries to avoid having her device turned back on, but they finally subdue her. It’s some serious shit, gang.
They say that the spikes aren’t coming from outside, they’re in everyone’s head, except for Donna, and Melanie, who have spent significant time in the TARDIS. And for extra fun, two days ago a satellite went up that finally connected the entirety of the earth to the internet, and now, everyone has access to a screen. 
And of course, Donna is working something out about the spike they’ve found, saying that she spent six months teaching Rose how to play the recorder; she thinks it’s a tune. Melanie sings it out and it strikes with everyone, like they’ve known it for years. And then Shirley finds it, it’s not a tune, it’s the laugh from the dummy. The Doctor figures out that the image has been burnt into television itself, into all the screens everyone is attached to every minute of everyday.
As they’re getting the date of the exact transmission, 14 gives Kate permission to shoot the satellite down, even though it’ll start an international incident. He’s the president of the world, and I love that. Her relief is palpable.
He also has a little moment with Melanie, which is so sweet. I love that whenever he rolls up to someone he hasn’t seen in decades, he always mutters the kindest little “hello.” Just for them. His attention completely focused. It must feel like a sun shining directly on you. I literally have a collection of David Tennant saying “hello” in my mind, ugh it’s so something. 
During all of this, Kate is telling Donna she did well working out the spikes, and she offers her a job at UNIT once everything has settled. Pure Donna, she asks how much the salary is, and then counters with DOUBLE the amount and 5 weeks paid vacation which is immediately accepted. BAMF, BAMF, BAMF. Get what’s yours, baby girl.
So much going on. Okay, so they go back to 1925, and 14 is all about what they need to do but Donna wants to hear about Mel because he’s never once mentioned her. He never does, he never talks about them. Rose a bit, yes, but usually no. Not ever. And he reminds her he’s old as hell and he can’t just chat about everyone, but it’s more than that. She tells him he never stops moving, she says “You are staggering along. Maybe that's why your old face came back. You're wearing yourself out” and that’s the crux of the matter, friends. 14 is wonderful, we’re all in love with him, but he’s definitely bleeding out everything. All over the place. And it’s so sad to see him so run down. But, classic 10, he ignores her.
They find the toyshop of course, and the Doctor recognizes the Toymaker. Who immediately starts a game of catch with the Doctor, because he’s a fucking weirdo like that, and 14 looks incredibly determined and also freaked out but Donna puts a stop to it, and the Toymaker disappears. 
They follow him deeper into the shop and surprise! They find themselves in a never ending hallway full of doors, and each door just leads to another hallway. Which should be impossible, but we’re told that the Toymaker is only governed by the rules of play, so he can basically do whatever the eff he wants.
Donna gets the story out of him as they wander - the Doctor had once gone into another realm, where he played a game against the Toymaker and apparently won, but he said he made a terrible mistake. Poor kiddo is really raw all of a sudden, he says “I'm always so certain. I'm all sonic and TARDIS and Time Lord. Take that away... Take away the toys... what am I? What am I now?” and then he tells Donna, “I don’t know…if I can save your life this time.”
Scrawny little 14 all exposed and helpless and I told you, he’s bleeding all over the place, and she just tells him, “Well…maybe I’ll save you.”
THEY’RE BEST FRIENDS, and she’s definitely gonna save him, just not in the way he thinks. And it’s so good.
Speeding ahead, they keep wandering through the halls and then they get separated of course and Donna gets attacked by the dummy that was supposed to be the original dummy’s wife and his creepy babies but she beats them obviously, and the Doctor gets taunted by the Toymaker but they find each other eventually.
And then they’re pulled into a room with a little stage where the Toymaker puts on a puppet show about exactly what has happened to the Doctor’s companions since he traveled with Donna. And it’s so sad to listen to him try to justify everyone’s fate - Amy died of old age, but in a time and place she was never meant to. Clara was killed by a bird but technically saved in her last moments of life. Bill was turned into a cyberman, but her consciousness lived on. No happy endings, for the Doctor and his friends, not ever. 
 To stop the show, the Doctor challenges the Toymaker to a game. And Donna’s afraid the Toymaker will cheat, but it seems the rules of the game bind his entire existence: the Doctor will either win or lose. So they cut a deck, and the highest card wins. And it’s the Toymaker, with a king.
But the Doctor finds a loophole - he won the first game, the Toymaker one the second game, and that prompts another, the best of three. Which the Toymaker accepts, but he wants that game to be played back in the present. 
Meanwhile at UNIT headquarters they’re shooting down the new satellite, and the Doctor and Donna appear to try and figure out a way to force the Toymaker out of the universe they way he’d come, but it’s too late. 14 is explaining something and then “Spice Up Your Life” is playing, and I’m sorry but L O L at the entire dance scene with NPH that unfolds. It’s hilarious, and creepy, and it definitely goes on too long, but I’ll allow a little pageantry. He turns UNIT’s bullets into flower petals and it’s a little terrifying, how much power he possesses and that’s the point. And then as soon as he’s arrived, he disappears again. 
Just kidding though, the Toymaker is out on the platform where the beam they used to take down the satellite is still set up and ready to roll, and he’s got control of it. So everyone of course rushes out to try and stop him. 
The Doctor tries to talk him down, of course. He asks why he’s choosing to be so horrible when he can do so many good things, and the Toymaker reminds him he’s just a vastness that good and bad don’t apply to, only winning and losing. The Doctor tells him he’s a vastness that contains so much more, and then he suggests they take the game away from earth, that they can play across the cosmos. 
He says “we can be…celestial” - and I’m dying inside. Is anyone else wondering what Aziraphale’s reaction to that sentence would have been? So many little bits of Good Omens, it’s slightly painful. 
Also, I appreciate that the Doctor is always trying to turn enemies into his playmates. 10 did it with the Master, too. It makes sense, he’s always off with humans but why wouldn’t entities that are more in line with what he is, want to travel with him? They always say no. Because y’all are too obsessed with your own drama to recognize what a fucking opportunity that is. Idiots.
So yeah, that doesn’t work and the Toymaker declares that since he played the first two games with different doctors, he wants to play the final game with the next Doctor. AND HE SHOOTS 14 WITH THE GIANT FUCKING LASER. 
It’s agonizing. It’s terrible. And Donna and Mel rush to his side as he starts to regenerate, because they don’t want him to be alone. They tell him he’s not dying, and they don’t care who he is, because every version of him is fantastic. And that’s what he needed to hear the first time. Every time, really.
And then he says “It's time. Here we go again. Allons-y!” (squee!) but…nothing happens. So he asks them to pull, yank on his arms, and they’re like ‘um’ but they do and THEN:
Out pops 15. And I’m losing my fucking mind. 
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Here’s the thing, gang. There is one sure fire way to make the new Doctor capture everyone’s heart, and that is apparently to let him interact with 14. Because everything that happens after this is incredible.
15 says “You're me. No, I'm me. I think I'm really, really me. Oh-ho-ho, I am completely me!” and he tells 14 to push, and they’re both like ‘will this work?’ and they’re laughing and they push against each other and they’re two separate entities and it’s amazing. 
14 obviously was all done up in his traditional suit (minus the coat) so now suddenly 15 is wearing the dress shirt, and the tie, and their charming little tightie whities, and the CONVERSES! And 14’s still got the pants, the undershirt, the vest, completely barefoot. I’m delighted and crying my eyes out. 
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So apparently they’ve bi-generated, which is supposed to be a myth and 15 asks Mel what she thinks and she says “I think you’re beautiful” and 14 pipes up, “still beautiful?!” and it’s all so good but the Toymaker is exasperated and then both Doctor’s say “I challenge you to a game” but he doesn’t like that. He’d caused the bi-generation and he doesn’t want to play both of them but he can’t say no.
What follows is the highest stakes game of catch that has literally ever existed. 14 and 15 are ducking and bobbing and weaving and catching and it’s ridiculous but also so filled with tension; whoever drops the ball, loses. David Tennant is a 50-something year old spindly noodle and oh my god he’s just crushing the entire thing, I could watch this all day. 
But someone has to lose, and thank god, eventually it’s the Toymaker. They decide their prize is going to be banishing him from existence forever. He gets folded up into a little square of douchebag, shoved in a box, and left to rot in the deepest recesses of UNIT’s storage. 
And it’s wonderful! But 14 can’t help but think of all of the people that died. And here is where 15 worms into everyone’s heart for the rest of eternity: he reminds 14 that he can’t save everyone, and then he grabs him into a hug and he says “Come here. I've got you. Yeah? It's OK. I'm here” and he kisses 14’s forehead. 
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It’s what the Doctor has always needed, but never got. A reminder from himself that what he does matters, that he’s good and he tries and it’s okay when things don’t go perfectly, but he does save people. He deserves acceptance from himself, and if he can’t give it in his own mind, he can get it from someone else who is literally him. It’s fucking beautiful.
They head back to the TARDIS and 14 shows 15 all the bells and whistles and 14 wonders how it’s going to work, the two of them? 15 makes him stop his anxious rambling, tells him “you're thin as a pin, love. You're running on fumes.” He keeps talking, about all of the things they’ve seen and done. The Pandorica, The Time War, losing River and Rose. The fact that Sarah Jane has died. 14 says, “I loved her” and 15 says “I loved her.” 
15 reminds him that they haven’t stopped, not for a second. But he’s fine, because 14 had fixed himself. He says “We’re doing rehab out of order.” And it’s true; 15 has taken in everything that Donna has been trying to get 14 to understand, he has the sweetness and the willingness to express his feelings that 14 finally learned, and now he’s putting his foot down, to himself. His old self. He’s telling 14 that he has to stop. 
But 14 doesn’t know how, and Donna tells him that he just has to exist, every single day, in and out. Over and over. And that’s the adventure. She says “I've worked out what happened. You changed your face... and then you found me. Do you know why?”
“To come home.”
If you didn’t lose it at that, you might need to examine your inner workings. It’s a punch to the gut. And it’s absolutely true. It’s the one thing the Doctor has never had, but now he can. And the way 14 asks “Do you mean…he flies off?” is so sad and small, and deflating, like he can’t imagine being pried away and made to stop and just be and exist. It’s terrifying for him. And he knows he can’t leave the TARDIS, it would hurt.
15 has an idea though, he thinks they might have a little bit of time, still being governed by a state of play, so he produces a sledge hammer and he hops out of the TARDIS, followed by 14 and Donna. 
He wields the hammer and he says “You get a prize, honey. And here is mine!” and he SWINGS against the TARDIS, and out pops another perfect little blue police box (and he runs a hand down the first one, saying “I’m sorry!”). Two TARDIS’s, two doctors. 
(I’m also swooning over 15’s use of endearments - love, honey - he’s gonna kill me.)
14 goes in to inspect the new TARDIS, he’s reverent almost, and it’s much the same, but it’s got a jukebox. He wanders back to his own TARDIS and 15 hops into the new one and powers her up and he’s definitely about to leave without a goodbye but 14 bounds back in with Donna to get what they’re owed. Which is hugs and a little sass. 15 says “off you pop, old man” and I love that, but they remind him he’s the older of the two now, so he says “Okay, kid. I love you. Get out!”
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15 is full of the love the Doctor never gets to give freely, but he’s ready now, and I’m so excited to watch that unfold. It’s so perfect and beautiful that 14 is the one who gets to feel it first. Baby boy needs so much more, and he’s gonna get it.
And so, off they both go. 15 to his endless adventures, 14 to something even more scary.
The last scene is a dinner at Donna’s, wherein 14 is telling a ridiculous story about using his eyebrows to communicate (Crowley, Crowley, Crowley…) and it’s just banter and it’s so good. We find out that he’s taking Mel on little adventures in the TARDIS, even Rose a time or two. He says “Just can’t turn down my favorite niece” and oh, it’s so lovely. He says “That’s what you are. With my best friend, my brother-in-law, the evil stepmother, and mad auntie Mel.” 
The desperate wanderer, a man who has run for thousands upon thousands upon thousands of years in a multitude of faces, finally has a family. 
Donna tells him he doesn’t have to stay forever, and then she asks him if he misses it out there. And his face, oh y’all his face as he says “The funny thing is, I fought all those battles for all those years... and now I know what for. This. I've never been so happy in my life”, it’s EVERYTHING.
Never, not once, has the Doctor gotten this. Usually, things work out just enough that it barely soothes the pain of what was lost. Never has he won so fully, so completely. Donna restored, and the chance to finally relish what he’s been protecting for so long. And no one deserved it more than 10 and 14.
The Doctor doesn’t have to be all hard edges and fire and war and unrelenting motion. He can be soft and vulnerable and he can accept help and he can love. 
And I didn’t even realize I wanted to see that. Doctor Who is like letting yourself believe in a higher power, a little bit. Believing in a species that maybe isn’t beholden to all of the disgusting emotions we have to deal with, he’s strong when we can’t be. He’s strong all the time. But I don’t think I’ve ever connected as much to an arch as I did to this one. We can’t be strong all the time. No one can. 
Watching the Doctor stop, and be taken care of for once, I let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding. Catharsis, on all sides. For everyone. I needed all of that way more than I’m ever willing to admit.
No matter what’s going on in the real world, at least now, somewhere out there 14 is hanging out at Donna’s house, telling silly stories and helping cook dinner and teaching Rose a bunch of science she should never get her hands on, and that’s satisfying in a way I can’t explain.
Basically, I’m so thankful for Doctor Who. And I can’t wait to see what happens next…
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elains · 3 months
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reading through your hofas spoilers and i definitely think sjm’s whiteness and proximity to zionism means she will never understand or even try to understand colonization and oppression, so every single time she insists on writing about it it just becomes an awkward and embarrassing mess to sludge through
Have I said I love when asks give me an opening to rant? So I will rant LMAO. Very light spoilers from HOFAS warning.
You'll probably find people who think Sarah is the most progressive, groundbreaking, and deals with thorny real-life subjects wonderfully. I'm very much not one of the. In fact, most of the time she tries to broach such topics, I end up sighing a lot, burying my head in my hands and saying "Sarah, please, for the love of God get yourself sensitivity readers".
Crescent City is the worst offender in this regard, House of Sky and Breath particularly because we are dealing directly with thr human rebellion. Bryce is SJMs mouthpiece in this series and so many times I wanted to tell her to shut the fuck up. Humanity is treated no better than objects or food in many parts of the world, prey for the vanir; born with no life, into subjugation, stripped of their dignity and their world. And still there she goes, condemning the Human Rebellion for what — rising up and fighting against their oppressors? Every time we met the rebels, from what recall, I was "Am I supposed to agree with here Bryce?"
After fifteen thousand years... you want the humans to ask nicely? That worked really well for them, so far?
Same with ACOTAR: the humans... are very fair in being scared and hate the fae? The Wall, the only thing keeping THEM safe is down and look at the continent! The Fae realms are already salivating to invade human lands. But the fear is unwarranted? "But not all fae!" true, but I don't blame them for being wary and "Fuck off". Midgard is worse because it was the Humans (and the Merfolk) who lived there before and they lived in peace.
It's clear for me that Sarah writes these topics from a position of privilege. You are correct: she lacks an understanding of the topics she is handling, has no interest in getting beyond surface level and, therefore, ends up writing things that at best tone-deaf and at worst fully hypocritical and problematic. And the framing. The framing of how these character are the heroes and in the right drives me up a goddamn wall.
HoFaS shows us that the Fae can be very, very horrible and bloodthirsty, which rings hollow for me with how much shit she gives humans for fighting back with force. I wish Bryce's human side mattered more (half the time, she's so connected to the Fae side you 100% forget), or that we had a human protagonists for this series.
In short: her take on oppression and colonization is shallow and privileged and tone-deaf.
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atdawnweryd · 1 year
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S2E5/S2E6 confrontation parallels
(please ignore how freakin ugly and un-uniform these gifs are it was taking foreverrrrrr and I gave up *sob)
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So, I feel like there are massive similarities between Simon and Wille's confrontation in the music room in episode 5 and Simon and Marcus' confrontation in episode 6, and I simply cannot continue to ignore them. They proceed like so:
Start off with an incredulous rhetorical question from party 1 followed by a lackluster attempt at defense by party 2. Sarcastic rebuttal from party 1 ensues (the eye before the storm), and then they go OFF, calling out party 2 on their (perceived) hypocrisy, essentially reaming them out for treating them poorly out of selfishness. Party 2 has no come back, party 1 drops mic and leaves.
The really interesting part here, is that Simon is the accuser in the first scene, but takes on the opposite role in the second scene. It's like the show is turning all the things he yelled at Wille in on their heads and giving him a taste of his own medicine. I don't know if this was intentional or I am off in delusional fan-land or what (come on in ya'll, the water's finee!!).
These two scenes together are (for me) a really effective way to emphasize the morally gray area all these characters are kind of residing in this season. It feels super harsh when Simon is yelling at Wille because he is not privy to everything that's been going on with Wille, he doesn't have all of the information. But at the same time, he's not totally wrong either. Wille did make an executive decision to keep Simon in the dark which was pretty shitty.
Likewise, although no one here is really sympathetic to Marcus, mans may have made a point or two. Does Marcus suck? Um, yes. But actually Simon doesn't think that Marcus sucks. Simon quite likes Marcus but is basically unable to get anywhere with him because of his feelings for Wille. Meanwhile though, he still allowed him to think that they were together, and then ditched him at the ball to makeout with his ex, which is kindaaa sketch (objectively. subjectively, it was awesome). However, Marcus also doesn't have all the information about Simon's motives. He doesn't understand how deep this thing between Simon and Wille runs, so from his perspective Simon is just messing him around with the prince of sweden, the elitest godamn elite of all the godamn elites at this goddamn elitist-ass boarding school. And, as a respectable flannel-gay, we all know how Marcus hates those elites.
So all of this really drives home the point that no one here is completely in the right or wrong. It's a messy situation all around, and everyone's suffering for it.
The other thing that I reallllly love about these parallel compositions, is that the argument with Marcus places Simon in Wille's previous position, where he gets similarly hit with accusations that demonstrated a lack of understanding of the full picture. In my opinion, this allows Simon to view his and Wille's confrontation from a different perspective - maybe he was being a little unfair, a little harsh, because he was hurt. But maybe he wasn't seeing the full picture either.
Of course at this point, Wille and Simon have already come to understand one another much better (hey thanks Karen Boye!), and hooked up in the bedroom. But nothing about their situation has truly been resolved, and recall that Simon is still undecided about what to choose re Wille while he is talking to Ayub later in the episode. And when he finally tells Wille he wants to be with him, his condition is "no more secrets between us", referring back to their fight.
I like to think that this experience was just one of several moments that allowed Simon to empathize better with Wille, and to finally allow himself to be open to giving their relationship another chance :)))))
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wooahaes · 1 year
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my movements are all about you
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pairing: non-idol!jun x fem!reader
genre: fluff
word count: 0.6k~
warnings: food mention! also reader thinks there’s an intruder in her apartment.
daisy’s notes: i was looking through jewelry trays for too much while trying to come up with a gift for reader...... and i saw one with a little cat sitting in the middle of it and i was like. that’s so cute. jun would.
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It was six in the goddamn morning and someone was in your apartment’s kitchen. Once upon a time, this wouldn’t have been a big deal, because roommates were a thing. But when you were just a girl living alone in her apartment... Well... There was a reason you started searching for a makeshift weapon.
With a jewelry tray in your hands (it had a little cat sitting in the middle of it--a present from your beloved Junhui because he saw it and thought of you), you started to inch forward. There were plenty of friends who would let themselves into your apartment, sure, but... That was typically with a call or a text beforehand, and usually not at six in the morning. But you’d heard the sound of a pan clamoring in the other room, and that was enough to jolt you from your slumber with a glance toward your phone. All you needed to do was throw the thing and hope it deterred whoever the hell was out there long enough for you to get out of your apartment and to your neighbors.
With the door open, you could hear the soft sound of humming. With a still half-asleep mind, your first thought was man, this burglar fucking sucks. And then your second was something smells sweet, because the scent hit you all at once. Your grip on the jewelry tray loosened a little as you furrowed your brow. Something hissed from the other room, and the humming continued throughout all of it. The scrape of metal against the bottom of the pan...
You inched forward still, and immediately recognized the sight of Jun standing at your stove. With that, you sighed in relief, feeling your shoulders slump. Thank god it’s only Jun... Who doesn’t live with you. You rubbed at your eyes with one hand.
“Junnie,” you whined, “it’s too early...”
He looked up, taking in the sight of you. His gaze fell to the object in your hand. “Why are you holding your jewelry tray...?”
You pouted, looking back to him, “I heard noises and I didn’t know it was you.”
“Oh.” A pause. You could see the gears turning, and then everything clicked. “Ahh--Honey, you’re not supposed to be awake!”
Maybe so, but how were you supposed to sleep when he must have dropped a pan or something? “Jun, I didn’t think you’d be here this early...”
He let out a long sigh, watching you. “That’s the point of a surprise, honey...” And then he ran a hand through his hair, looking at the french toast he’d already plated for you. There was a bowl of cut strawberries next to it, apparently already placed there for plating. “Now that you know...” He turned back to you, “Can you set the table? I’m almost done here. I was going to do it before I woke you up, but...”
You giggled, making your way over to him. You stole a quick kiss from him, smiling against his lips before turning to get the utensils you needed. And maybe you’d steal another quick peck from him while getting the orange juice from the fridge while he plated his own breakfast. He carried breakfast over to you, your french toast piled high with strawberries and whipped cream, and sat across from you.
“Happy birthday, my love,” he smiled from across the table, head resting in his hand as he watched you cut into it. Even if it meant his food would get cold, he wanted to admire you, first. “I’m sorry I messed up the surprise.”
(And when you looked up at him, cheeks puffed with food because sweets enticed you effortlessly, he had to hold back a laugh so full of love. Maybe next year he’d be able to surprise you for real.)
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taglist: @twancingyunhao​ @wonuziex​ @synthetickitsune​ @cinnamoroxie​
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magnuscomedybracket · 5 months
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Round 3 Match 1
087 Uncanny Valley vs. 021 Freefall
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Propaganda under the cut!
087 Uncanny Valley
Guy cleans out flesh from a drain without a blink and nikola has to invite him back again with Jude because he wasn’t scared enough the first time because of obliviousness
Besides the obvious bit of Guy who Doesn’t Realize He’s In A Horror Story, imagine this from Nikolas perspective. Like “oh shit lol this guys name is “skinner” I’m gonna mess with him for shits and giggles… Ok he didn’t notice any of my spooky bullshit, wild! I threatened to butcher him and he was Not Paying Attention! Jude! Hey! Come check out this idiot man!”. Also implication that Jude and nikola hang out being shitty together. I support women’s wrongs.
"Megan" tries to expose this guy to The Horrors and he's so focused on his job that he just doesn't notice. She's so shocked by this that she calls him back and still has to literally force him to notice
The world's most oblivious plumber somehow doesn't notice all the creepy stuff going on and just does his job like normal. It only gets funnier when you consider it from the Stranger avatar's point of view.
Nikola Orsinov trying so hard to scare the least observant man you've ever seen. Whispering in his ear about flencing while he hums noncommittally and pulls a wad of meat from the drain of her spooky factory in the middle of fuck-all nowhere and then he just gives her the invoice and walks out??? Like it's a normal job? And when she calls him to come back the next day she has to dress up in a clown costume to get his attention and grab his head to make him look at The Atrocities that he just entirely missed the day before. I love Sebastian Skinner so much and I wish only the best for him
#I really just want to point out that they're trying to scare a plumber. #A plumber!! #do you think this is the first time this man has had to clean skin and hair out of a drain? #do you think he's never seen blood before? #like yeah it's objectively funny from the Horror's point of views but for him? It's a tuesday #Like that isn't even the weirdest thing he's seen that week #'oh they threatened to butcher him' yeah? what makes them special? #this guy probably deals with 20 different avatars a week by necessity #no amount of 'his name is skinner let's fuck with him' is going to be worse than service work in people's homes (via @/childoferebus)
#the only reason we know what's happening for half the episode is taht we know this is an horror story #and how things usually go. #dude spends half the episode going 'just a normal job. #house in the middle of nwohere. weird smells and textures #*shrugs* just anotehr day on the job* (via @/monstersqueen)
021 Freefall
I feel a little mean for finding this statement funny but… Simon really said, ‘enjoy sky blue’ than had this man falling for ages. “Before I address the central point of this statement, namely the question of… whether the sky can eat people” fantastic line. Also the indignant way he responds to Martin coming in with the Goddamn worms-
The Looney Tunes ass mental image of a lone parachute falling from the sky into a field.
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milkycarnations · 1 year
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Eyyy! Do you think you could do some hcs with Masky, Hoodie, Ej and maybe Toby, where the reader is a Taxidermist? :] I’m a girl with a morbid fascination with dead things, being both a wildlife taxidermist and having studied mortuary sciences/embalming, for funerals as well! Grew up in a hunting family so blood and guts have never bothered me. I collect animals skulls and stuff like that, too, I’d love you forever if you brought me a dead thing, a weird bug, or a strange rock/weird object
Sure thing! This ask was a ton of fun.
The Proxies + Jack with A Taxidermist S/O
Masky
He enjoys your company. You don't get all "squishy" when it comes to death and dead things. Granted, those dead things aren't people, but your tolerance for blood and guts is a bit charming to him.
He's in the woods often so he'll bring you so much goddamn road kill.
And if your morals are just as awful as his, he'll bring you human skulls and bones to mess around with too. They might not be... uh... mint condition.
Hoodie
He's pretty amused, but not a fan of the smells. He'll give you your little play space. Keep your stuff in there and organized and he has no issues.
He definitely appreciates the finished project, especially after seeing how much work you put into it.
He'd love to try insect displaying with you. It's similar to taxidermy, but more of his style.
Will ask you to help him clean up when his own business gets messy.
Jack
You two get along like two peas in a pod. He's all things morbid and eerie and especially dead.
Assuming you like hunting and taxidermy, this cat demon will gift you the finest dead animals. Expertly killed and in really good condition. You aren't sure how he does it, but you're in love.
You also likely have tons of access to mortuary equipment, but that's just the perk of being around Jack. I always imagine him living in a defunct hospital or funeral home anyway, - anything with medical equipment.
Toby
He asks you if it's possible to taxidermy a person and you gladly explain to him why it's not very... easy.
Since he likes you, he likes taxidermy. He insists on being involved.
He asks you to show him how you do it. He enjoys putting the pelts back on, but he especially enjoys the artistic liberty of recreating the gloss on the eyes and the shine on the noses of animals.
He thinks taxidermy is a true display of love. Why wouldn't you want to immortalize your pets this way?
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2023 Fic Round Up (Part 2: Fic Quotes)
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For favorite lines, I tried to choose quotes that may have less visibility—maybe they haven't made it into a tumblr post or the summary, but I love them all the same. To make this easier for myself, I'm limiting this to quotes from my three published works that I'm the most proud of, plus the two WIPs that I've worked on the most recently.
Presented in reverse chronological order, I present fic quotes:
Unnamed Porn Star x Filmmaker AU
I literally wrote both of these as I outlined two days ago, so they have not reached their Final Form. Also, Smut Warning.
Alex is jealous of the wax. An inanimate object. For being spread across another man’s body. He’s pretty sure he’s completely lost his mind.
Moments later, Henry comes all over Basil’s hand as he uses it to stroke Henry, coating the deep blue wax that’s slowly hardening on his dick. A completely fucking mess. Alex wants to get his mouth on it.
Honey, You're Familiar (From My Mirror Years Ago) aka the Dads Fic
I've shared a lot of my favorites, but I don't know if I've shared this—pretty prose has never been a strength of mine, so I'm pretty proud of this:
June glances up at Henry, studying him for a moment. He wonders what she sees, if she can tell that he’s a crystal vase filled with a bouquet of emotions—absolutely transparent and if nudged too hard, the carefully crafted container might just crack apart, contents spilling out, shattering all remnants of what might have once been construed as beautiful.  An unavoidable mess. The hyacinths, taking up most of the space, for regret and remorse. Tulips, a bit hopeful, for forgiveness. Purple lilac, stubbornly wedged in the mix from the first moment Alex flashed his smile at Henry, for love at first sight. He thinks maybe June does catch a glimpse of the blossoms, because the next thing he knows, her eyes face softens a bit, and she’s turning back to face her cousins with her hand pressed against Henry’s back. It’s not the touch of the Claremont-Díaz sibling he craves, but it still settles him somehow, even before she speaks.
(Dil)Do It Yourself 
Chapter 1
“Pez, like the candy?” Alex blurts out. He doesn’t have much of a filter on a good day, but hot people make his porous coffee filter turn into a goddamn colander.
Also Chapter 1
"If I find that you have somehow managed to muck it up, how should I plan to contact you?” Alex grins back at Henry. He has no fucking clue why this British elf who speaks like a Victorian orphan and looks like he stepped out of a Calvin Klein photoshoot has him thinking about getting a second apartment key made, but here he is. Mentally googling routes to his nearest hardware store. “Well, usually, when it’s for business I just give out my fax,” he drawls, unable to contain his smile as he gets to the second half of his sentence. “But since I’m fairly interested in mixing this with pleasure, I guess I can share my cell number.”
Soft stuff before the less soft stuff in Chapter 3
What he’s absolutely not prepared for is the look on Henry’s face when he spots Alex entering the shop—like Alex just saved babies from a burning building or cured cancer or something. It’s way too fucking much when Henry doesn’t even know about Alex’s coffee addiction or the way he incessantly taps his foot when he’s focused or how Alex accidentally interrupts people when he starts getting really passionate in a debate. Maybe Alex can accept that Henry’s into his jokes or his smile or his dick. But basically, Henry hasn’t learned about all the other stuff that comes with spending an extended period of time around Alex. He’s not getting his hopes up. Except when Henry smiles, and softly greets him with “I missed you,” Alex absolutely gets his hopes up.
Claremont 2008 
Both of these are from the final chapter of the fic:
Henry’s sitting at his desk, a heavily annotated Norton’s Anthology of Poetry propped open to his left, a notebook full of beautiful, neat cursive laid open to his right. The soft glow of his lamp warms the small space, coupled with the changing light from the window as the early sunset fills the room with an orangey light that makes Henry appear golden, like he’s been blessed by Apollo, or Helios, or some other sun god.
Finally arriving at their door, Henry unlocks it for the first time, the movers having finished up while the two of them went over to pick up a nametag for their new roommate. After taking a few steps down the hall, they enter into a cozy living room already filled with both their book collections and their family photos all jumbled together. The Lightning Thief sits next to Pride and Prejudice like they’re two puzzle pieces aligning, a photo of Henry and Arthur on a sailboat hangs next to one of Alex sitting on his abuela’s lap: two homes side by side. 
Freaky Friday (I woke up in my enemy's body) 
Alex waxing poetic about Shaan's ass
“You can, er , go,” Alex directs him, though it comes out like more of a question. Apparently it was effective enough, though, because the guy exits, and the phrase “hate to see you go, love to watch you leave” pops into his mind when he gets a view of his ass strutting out of the room in that suit.
The Great Dick Soliloquy
Eventually, and to Alex’s great shame, he gives in. He just has to know, okay? It’ll just be a brief glimpse, he assures himself. Alex is not kidding when he says that he took one glance at Henry’s dick and it changed his life. He really did intend on it being a brief glimpse.
Thank you to @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @firenati0n @anincompletelist for the tags!
Sorry if I missed one of y'all doing this, tagging @littlemisskittentoes @ssmtskw @affectionatelyrs @read-and-write- @matherines @rockyroadkylers!
To see all my 2023 fics in Part 1, click here.
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transingthoseformers · 6 months
Note
Out of curiosity, besides the planet from Subnautica, which other planets from other media/games do you think would be good for Cybertronians?
I typically think about Subnautica because I love it dearly
But
I've only watched a tidge of Star Trek (okay I watched Star Trek: Lower Decks and the other shows are on my list okay) and I think a lot about if humans first met cybertronians by the time humans were already space travel capable
I LOVE INTEGRATING ANIMORPHS AND TRANSFORMERS INTO EACH OTHER. Even if it's just mentioning the various planets and alien species in it and not focusing on any of the plot details (usually what I do, I think more about the worldbuilding in animorphs than I should)
Especially since in Animorphs there's an agreed upon "universal language" of Galard at least I think it's Galard and thinking about how the various races in Animorphs would regard the cybertronians
If IDW was any indication... Most of them probably hate the cybertronians like hell. The andalites definitely would. The yeerks would deem them an objective threat as they can't be infested, their technology might be slightly less advanced but it's Goddamn Enough considering how big cybertronians are, cybertronians are relatively a far older race, and they tend to cause a mess of the planets they arrive on. I'm torn between the Hork Bajir immediately comparing them to the monsters of old on their homeworld or the two getting along pretty good because a Hork Bajir can scale a taller transformer with little harm to either party. I've been thinking a lot about the Skrit Na interacting with cybertronians too because I get the vibe they'd deal with neutrals and some cybertronian technology a lot.
Yes, in my opinion based on what I can see the Andalites and Yeerks have relatively more "advanced" technology, considering Z-space technology being relatively common in their ships and how the andalite shredders / whatever the yeerks called theirs (dracon beams? I forget.), but I can see transforming and morphing being compared so so much (it'd be an interesting discussion considering how transforming and the T-cog is legitimately an integral part of Cybertronian anatomy, while morphing and the Escafil Device / morphing cube is still relatively revent technology)
Like. In universe, the Yeerks have only been at this space faring conqueror race for a handful of decades now, and their war with the andalites is the same. Compare, say, forty years of war (which is still a fucking lot) to the four million (give or take a few) of the autobots and decepticons. Y e a h. There's a significant chance that the cybertronians star in a lot of nightmare inducing bedtime stories.
PLUS REMEMBER ALL THE LONG EXTINCT SPECIES, CIVILIZATIONS IN THE WORLD OF ANIMORPHS. How many of those could the cybertronians have met? If so, how did that go?
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deludedfantasy · 9 months
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Trimax Vol 7 Ch 1-3
Sooooo, the first half of this volume might have destroyed me. I spent a lot of time staring into space between panels because the horrors were getting to me. Prepare for lots and lots of yelling. Here goes.
Ch 1
With a story like Trimax, I get incredibly nervous when an entire volume is named Happy Days. I know I am being lied to. 
The way the crew comes out of their pods really reads like people clawing their way out of coffins. Very ominous. 
Wow, this guy is rude. Rem hasn’t talked to anyone but Plant children in a whole year and the first thing that happens when the crew wakes up is that one of them harrasses her. Ugh. He could’ve stayed asleep for another three years if that’s how he was gonna be. 
Argh, there are way too many people in this chapter and I can’t tell who’s talking when the whole crew is together. 
I don’t know what to make of it, but Rem’s eyes are completely white when she lies to the crew. I know someone pointed out that Wolfwood’s eyes are white when he’s in an incredibly emotional state so I wonder if this is something similar?
Knives just messing around with the thrusters because he was curious. So not only do Independent plants grow quickly, they’re apparently incredibly smart. But also still kids because he absolutely messed something up.
Ah, young Conrad meeting the twins for the first time. I like that Tristamp made him a more important character because of what happened to Tesla. 
Knives is so concerned with what humans think of him! Having him be so drastically different as a child really makes you wonder what happened to make him hate humanity as much as he does. 
Oh no, baby Knives is crying! He just wants to be loved and accepted. Both of them love Rem so much too. Oh my god, I just wanna cry. This chapter is the sweetest, nicest one we’ve had in a while.
Pages that make me wanna sob because of dramatic irony. Little Knives is so hopeful…he’s so full of love and understanding and naivety. I don’t wanna watch it break.
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Ohhhh. Now that I know what’s going on, this part makes a lot more sense to me. Knives and Vash think they see one of the people in cryo chambers awake, and they follow her. I think this is actually a telepathic Plant thing. Tesla is still alive, so she’s projecting herself into their minds and leading them to her. 
She shows up right after Knives’s revelation about working through their differences with humanity. I wonder how much she hears and is aware of, because it seems significant that she shows up then, like a vengeful ghost that wants to show him how wrong he is.
God, I hate reading the report notes. They’re so chilling and dehumanizing. They keep calling her a “subject” but what we see is a little girl. And she looks so small and scared. Man, I really shouldn’t be reading this late at night. I’ll be up all night thinking about this.
“Trouble over a question of ethics.” Well, that’s a fucking understatement! Question of goddamn ethics, you scanned her so often you gave her cancer! Because you were treating a living thing—no, a child—like an inanimate object that could take as much abuse as you threw at it. 
110 days is just over 3 months. I’m raging. How many times did they use radioactive scanning equipment on this little girl to give her tumors??? I had to get one CT scan done and they were extremely reluctant to do it because I was young and they weren’t sure it would show what was wrong with me. 
My brain is only capable of producing screaming noises right now. These last pages are brutal and gory and…yeah, really messed up. 
All the notes have to say is “Project is closed.” PROJECT??? PROJECT????? That was a little girl you experimented on so much that you basically killed her! I’m gonna throw my laptop out the window. 
I’ve come back a little calmer and actually, I can’t tell if she’s alive or not. In Tristamp, it seems like she was put into cryo sleep to preserve her while she was technically alive. But here, I can’t tell. Thing is, she wouldn’t be able to do her Plant telepathy otherwise. Hmmm.
Ch 2
Oh no no no no, little Vash’s dead eyed face is too much for me right now. He’s had his doubts about humans, sure, but this is too much for him to handle. This is the revelation of humanity’s evil that he’s far, far too young to be able to handle. 
Oh God, and he’s alone in there with Tesla’s dissected body because Knives fainted. He can’t look away, he’s never been able to look away, and all he can see now is how different he is from humanity. Right now, he doesn’t see any way they can reconcile their differences. 
This page, where Vash looks like he’s floating curled into a ball while tormented by those staring eyes, is a nice juxtaposition to a similar panel in the last volume. There, he was peacefully floating in zero-g and feeling safe. Here, is the exact opposite. Here, it’s the loss of his innocence. 
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Vash is so angry. Rightfully so! What was done to Tesla was horrible and what proof does he have that the same won’t be done to him? Rem has been lying to him his whole life. He’s found out just how cruel the world is. It’s so easy to forget (and honestly not always easy to see) with adult Vash, but at heart, he is driven by anger. And I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing, because in his case, his kindness comes from that deep-seated anger. Remind me to write a longer post about that later. 
Still, it’s so interesting to see that anger and realize it’s always been in him, from the very beginning. 
But this is also the start of something worse—Vash’s suicidal ideation comes from here. He doesn’t see a point in living if the world would treat beings like him with such cruelty, forever leaving him marked as other and inhuman. He doesn’t want to live in a world of only humans. How does he become the man who will do anything in his power to defend humanity when all he has right now is fear and hatred? 
Vash refusing to eat because he just doesn’t see the point and doesn’t want to live—I see where Tristamp got Vash’s feelings about deserving to eat from. 
Oh my God??? OH MY GOD???? Vash was gonna stab himself. Like yes, I’ve read this before, and yes, I know he’s actively suicidal here, but just—this is the first time we’re seeing it exposed like this, the very depths of his despair. The past few pages, the way he’s been drawn, with his cheeks hollowed and his eyes without expression or emotion, it’s A Lot and I’m not okay. 
And Rem just fucking grabs the blade to stop him. She’s willing to hurt herself to keep him from dying. He learned all of this from her, every part of his ideology, and it wasn’t in abstraction. He saw it and, not only that, it was what Rem did to save him. He really becomes her continuation. 
Vash has this moment where he becomes very unhinged and actually sounds a bit like future Knives when he hurts Rem by pulling the blade away from her. He learns how powerful violence is, the relief and catharsis it can bring. But immediately after he has these thoughts, he sees how he hurt Rem and that snaps him back to himself, to the little boy he is who just loves his mother. 
He has her blood on his hands and that’s too much for him to take. She might be one of the humans that hurt Tesla, but he still loves her and it scares him to see her like that.  
He patches her up and gets something to eat….my heart is breaking. He’s just a little baby, why does this have to happen to him?
The blank ticket story is going to make me cry. There’s so much hope in it, especially when you consider the situation Rem had that dream in. She was depressed as hell, she’d lost someone she loved and probably didn’t see a point in going forward either. And it’s a reminder that there’s more to the world than evil and darkness. There’s kindness and goodness too and that’s what Vash needed to hear. 
I also think he needed to see Rem’s tears and remorse to remind him that he knows her. She might have made a mistake with Tesla but she never did anything to them. She’s trying to make up for it, with everything in her being she’s trying. 
Also, “If you hadn’t stopped me then, I never would have known that when you cry, Rem, you look like you’re laughing.” WOW, Vash you really picked up all your best and worst qualities from your mom, huh? You learn to do the same thing.
Knives wakes up with a dead-eyed look and then says he doesn’t remember anything. Yeahhhh, no, I don’t think so.
Ch 3
The chapter titles in this volume are going to be the death of me. I don’t know if I can handle reading something called “King of Loneliness” after that last chapter. Send help, I’m doing it anyway.  
“She hung her head low.” What happened weighs on Rem so much and you just know she ended up taking care of Knives and Vash as some kind of penance. I don’t think she expected to love them as much as she did by the end. But she also never intended on telling them any of this and just forging ahead with them into the new world, disappearing without ever having to face up to what she did.
I can’t blame her though. Is there a good way to tell a child a truth like that? But it would have been better if she’d told them all of this rather than Vash and Knives finding out on their own. Much like it would’ve been better if Vash was honest about who he was and what his mission was with Meryl, Milly, and Wolfwood from earlier on. Hiding things from the people you love rarely ends well. 
“There’s so much we have to do to make sure it never happens again.” Now that’s what I call foreshadowing and dramatic irony. We all know what Knives means by that. 
But Vash knows something’s wrong with Knives. And we see it too. This is the first time in these chapters his face is obscured in shadows, just like it was when we were first introduced to this younger version of him volumes ago. This is the first moment where Vash feels like he doesn’t know his brother. 
Knives is losing it. He’s painting himself in his own blood as he no doubt plans the Big Fall. His descent into fear and darkness here is masterfully done and so unsettling. 
The juxtaposition of these pages too, with his fearful face covered in blood and tears and the triumph as he watches the ships fall from the sky. This was an act of evil, yes, but it was driven by fear and helplessness. 
Knives claims all his decision making as rational, but these last few pages have shown that to be untrue. Certainly, there was logic behind it, but most of it was driven by emotion. 
Ohhhhh, I finally understand this bit! Knives merges with the Plant! He asks her for help and shows what he’s feeling, his anger at humanity and, ultimately, his plans. Last volume, he realized he doesn’t have the power to achieve his goals alone and this is how he plans to fix that. 
At the beginning of this chapter, I thought the King of Loneliness was going to be Vash, but really, it’s Knives. He pushed everyone away and destroyed the colony fleet. He pushes away the Gung Ho Guns and merges with the Plants to achieve his goals. Ultimately, he is still a scared lonely boy who never processed the terrible things he witnessed and learned. His trust was broken so completely, he never recovered.
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cdyssey · 1 year
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Yellowjackets 2.02 Thoughts:
Shauna talking to Jackie’s dead ghost is so fucking haunting. The utter banality of the talk, and yet, at the same time, Jackie always urging Shauna towards some sort of precipice, whether it’s confessing the “truth” or acknowledging that she’s the one holding the knife. No one’s doing homoerotic fucked up besties like them. 😭
Tai and Lottie both caring for Shauna makes me tender.
God, I really appreciate Callie’s character. Her parents are really messing her up, and yet, even as she’s cognizant of this, one of the things she seems to be hurt by most is the fact that neither of them have registered that she’s gone. She talks about using the vape to numb herself into oblivion. And that’s exactly how Shauna feels every single day.
TAISSA POUNDING ESPRESSO AFTER ESPRESSO. REFUSING TO SLEEP. HER REFLECTION MOVING. MA’AM, SEEK HELP.
The fucking no-eyed man. I can deal with the extensive gore. I can handle the cannibalism. But THIS GUY. Every time he comes on my screen, I McFreakin’ lose it. What is his DEAL?
Also, why tf is this show so darkly lit? Showtime, do better.
Sophie Thatcher perfectly replicating Juliette’s cadence is always so incredible to me!!!!! Of the casting pairs, I’ve always thought they look the least alike appearance wise, but goddamn, Sophie nails the mannerisms.
“We are an intentional community turning suffering into strength.” Lmao, Lottie. Also, adult Lottie is so, so pretty.
“It’s heliotrope, it’s not purple.” AKQKWKDJWJS.
Lottie treating Lisa like an underpaid intern about the drink, lmfao. Loving adult Lottie’s vibes so far. Her entire enlightened act is so performative, but simmering underneath, is that same uneasy energy that the rest of our core four has. To take the analogy further, she’s seemed to take the Tai and Shauna route of trying to repress what happened in the woods and pretend like everything’s fine. She’s fine. Of course she’s paired with Nat, the perpetual realist here.
Shauna trying to reach out to Callie and being rebuffed at every attempt. It’s not necessarily that it’s too little, too late, and more that she’s ignoring the elephant of a body in the room, trying to move past it, like she always does. Hhhhhghhh.
Misty’s screensaver being a stock photo of ultra cute kittens is perfect. ANQKWOQWODJ, MISTY ANGRILY REPLYING ON “REDDIT” AND THEN REALIZING SHE MADE A TYPO. WKQKWKSJDJAJ.
THE MAKEUP ON JACKIE. GODDAMN.
Tai confronting Shauna is so fucking painful. Sophie Nélisse utterly shutting down. Lottie defending her. I’m so unwell. They both care for her so much, and there’s also this added element of Taissa trying to run from her own demons by making Shauna confront her own.
Taissa and Shauna’s relationship genuinely might be my favorite on this show in both timelines. Like, it is so complicated and raw and brutal and simultaneously so loving. Hhhggsghhhshhh.
Kevyn showing up. Oh, God. Oh, God. And Shauna fuckin’ lying. LISTEN, I objectively know they’re not going to stick Melanie Lynskey in jail (at least for long), but still, I can’t wait for this storyline to be resolved.
KEVYN CATCHING HER IN THE LIE. GODDAMN. BABY GIRL, MISTY MADE YOU A COOKIE TELLING YOU EXACTLY WHAT TO SAY.
AND SHE’S STILL LYING. GIRLFRIEND,THEY CAN SUPBOENA YOUR TEXTS OR SOMETJING.
Callie stepping in to help her mom. I’m actually so tender about their effed up relationship, it’s unreal.
“So you lied to be feminist?” KQQKKWEKDJDJEJEJNSWHAJS.
“At least go through the back in case he’s still out there.” I’m unwell.
Sammy showing up. Hhhhgh. As upsetting as it is that Simone is being so cautious and cold towards Taissa, it is so warranted after finding your beloved family dog beheaded in the basement as part of some fucked up sacrificial altar.
Elijah Wood!!!!!!!!!! AKWKDNNSS. THE KNEE HIGH SOCKS WITH THE SHORTS.
NAT FAKING JAVI’S DEATH, OH, MY FUCKING GOD. CUTTING HERSELF TO FAKE BLOOD. THIS SHOW.
Poor Travis. Oh, my God.
Adult Travis!! The fact that he calls Lottie as well… Simone Kessell is doing such a wonderful job with Lottie; her rage and fear in the Travis flashbacks are compelling.
GOD. TRAVIS INITIATING THIS RITUAL. Whether we can trust that Lottie’s telling the truth, that remains to be seen, but I do think the fact that they’re accompanying the story with a bonafide flashback makes me think that they want us to take it at least some of it at face value.
THE ZOMBIE FUCKING LAURA LEE HALLUCINATION. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. The tenderness in her eyes before LL stepped out of the shadows, though. Lottie/Laura Lee truthers rise up.
Also, adult Lottie/Nat have very good chemistry.
THERE BEING A CHAIN ON TAISSA’S GODDAMN DOOR. DID SHE HALLUCINATE HER SON? UM.
WHERE THE FUCK ARE SAMMY AND STEVE, TAI? 😭
Oh, God. The debate about Jackie’s clothes. So brutal. Like the earlier cabin scenes in this ep. showed, the tensions between the girls are reaching a fever pitch.
Lottie seeing the cut on Jackie’s arm, but not being judgmental about it. Giving her the necklace. 😭😭
Callie, don’t flirt with that grown ass man. Nooooooo.
Callie lying and saying she’s a student at Rutgers, the same school Jackie and Shauna were supposed to go to. ;-;
Shauna going to light the pyre when Nat was confronting Lottie. Hhhhgh.
“I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE YOU END AND I BEGIN.” NOT A BLURRED MARGINS LINE. FUCK ME UP.
Travis adding Javi’s pants to the fire. 😭 Lottie and Tai being the ones who escort Shauna away. Hhhhhshhhhhhgh.
I’m so excited to see the other adults interact with Lottie.
Nat having a clearly traumatic flashback when she lays down…
AWNDNSNSN, THE BLACKLIGHT NOTE.
THE DUDE CALLIE WAS FLIRTINT WITH BEING A DETECTIVE. JESUS.
Kevyn being soft on Shauna. ;w; I really do like him, and I’m glad they brought him back.
Not Travisnat having sex on the eve when he just found out his brother is dead. NOT HIM ENVISIONING LOTTIE. WOOF.
THE TWISTING AERIAL PERSPECTIVE. SNOW FALLING ON TOP OF JACKIE’S PYRE. OH, MY GOD. IT’S???????? IT’S SMOKING HER. IT’S FUCKING COOKING HER FOR REAL.
TAI HALLUCINATED SAMMY. OH, MY GOD.
“You are… very sick, Taissa.” I’m so sad.
“BAD ONE” TAISSA NOT LOOKING AT THE ROAD, GLARING AT SIMONE. A FUCKING WRECK. SHIT. SIMONE, PULL THROUGH QUEEN. SOMEONE HAS TO BE NORMAL FOR SAMMY.
OH, GOD. THAT FIRST SHOT OF JACKIE’S BODY IS SO FUCKED UP.
THEY ARE ALL GONNA FUCKIN’ EAT HER.
SHE WANTS US TO.
THE GREEK MYTHOLOGY FEAST. IT’S A SACRED COMMUNION. IT’S BACCHANALIA. IT’S STARVING CHILDREN EATING THEIR TEAM CAPTAIN AND FRIEND IN THE WOODS.
POOR COACH BEN. HELP AOQMWNDNJWJWJSJSJS.
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norellenilia · 1 month
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Damn, I remember the first time I watched FMA 03, when I was 16 or 17, I stayed up until 1 am to finish it, and today, watching episodes 38 through 42 turned me into such an emotional mess that I have to take a break lmao what happened??? My own emotional traumas, that's what happened
I'm feeling so many things again
In episode 38, when Ed and Al are fighting, Al drenches Ed in water and he says "it's going to rain!!!" and I'm like haha no don't try to pull a Mustang on me I know this episode won't make me cry and GUESS WHAT the flashback with Trisha convincing Ed to go and find Al so they can talk things out and Al looking so happy that Ed isn't upset with him anymore it's so cute I CRIED
I need -- no, I DEMAND a spin-off series where Winry and Scziezka solve murder mysteries together (I'd love to write it myself but I know I'm not nearly good enough at coming up with mystery stories lol), they're adorable I'm so happy they totally get together post CoS
Martel's death hits SO MUCH HARDER than I remembered holy shit, she and Al actually got close, we see more of her, her death is so horrific and hearing sweet sweet baby boy Alphonse cry just BROKE MY HEART I never wanted to hug an armor so badly
Scar's brother's last moments, the way he looks so terrified and desperate to protect his little brother from Kimblee and Scar being so devastated when he dies I just-- *clenches fist*
Sloth using Ed's PTSD against him that's so UNFAIR; also I was thinking that I was a bit disappointed that this anime did not include the nightmare that Ed has at some point in the manga where he sees his mom saying "why didn't you make me right" etc but this is it, this is this scene, and it's worse because he's hearing it for real, he is very much awake, he has the real voice of his mom in his ears and she's saying this to him and I'm-- *clenches fist harder*
Rose's story, I'm still so mad, she deserves all the happiness in the world
Speaking of Rose, it's so funny how the moment Al is like "I wonder how Rose is doing" the show just full on goes "Ed/Rose shipper" mode lmao, with Ed blushing while pretending not to remember her, him being so awkward when he speaks to her just before they go on their separate ways and her son just smiling and giggling when he speaks (first time we see the baby laugh, he had only been crying up until then) :') To be honest it feels a bit out of the blue to me but idk
Dante sporting Lyra's white ass in the town of brown people and speaking as if she was part of them just because she's following Rose around to manipulate her is incredibly cringe, but then again, it's Dante, she's the villain and we're already supposed to know something is up with "Lyra". But still.
Very random but Al pulling objects from or putting objects inside his armor from behind the cloth always looks very awkward lol
I used to never really care about Scar but I have learned the errors of my way as I now realize he is actually one of the best characters in this goddamn series, even with the orb of knowledge and the three arm losses, and Mangahood!Scar being much more villainized and ending up working with the military will never come even CLOSE to 03!Scar using his last bit of strength to save Alphonse to honor his love for his lost brother and take his ultimate revenge on those who murdered his people in the goal of protecting oppressed people, all of this while an epic music is playing (honestly it even feels like Ed is made to be seen as an obstacle as he tries to prevent the soldiers from entering Liore lol)
Sorry but Wrath is annoying as hell, I know that I'll probably have a different opinion if I rewatch CoS after that, but for now I hate him
We're finally entering the "Rewrite" era of the show and I had forgotten how much it rocks (Ed's hair animation at the beginning fhjkfhkdhjk)
I only have 9 episodes left but between Lust and Sloth in the upcoming episodes I'm not even sure I'll be able to watch it all in one go lol. Still excited to see more of Winry and Scziezka and remembering how much Hohenheim is absolutely useless in this x)
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horsegirlalexkralie · 11 months
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yEAH
They totally get off with the sneaking around, too. tim tells alex he'd love to keep this up, but only bc alex seemed to really enjoy himself and definitely not bc he's absolutely addicted to his cock at this point (nothing has been enough, he suddenly stops hooking up with random assholes bc none of them are good enough and he sends them off still needy and frustrated) and alex agrees bc he likes being able to finally break tim down and make him a mess
I say this idea gets 100 times better if tim and alex sneak off during filming and get caught fucking by brian and jay
real. so real. tim and alex still tsundereing at each other while theyre literally constantly sneaking away from work to fuck? so fucking real. constantly snipping at each other on set like everyone else cant see whats happening. 'calling for five' when they just got on set- like jay and brian won't notice. like they haven't seen alex taking tim aside night after night, the two of them arriving to rehearsal together, late, with flimsy excuses for why.
jay and brian cracking jokes every time the two of them are stuck alone on set abt what alex and tim must be up to that slowly turns into wondering and theorizing abt how hey, what if they are? they sure have been gone a while. wouldnt that be funny. it kinda works when you think about it, huh. h uh.
and theyre both Thinking About It (maybe sorta kinda talking abt it in a liiiittle too much detail to just be guys being dudes making jokes being bros and giving each other kinda sorta little bro handjobs and dudely manly kisses on the lips abt it) and then theyre on set and tims wearing what jay keeps calling his slut jeans and theyve been running the same goddamn scene for like an hour (six lines tim has six entire lines and hes said them more than brians gotten to open his mouth at all alex has to be banging him or doing weird psychosexual director shit with him this is like objectively silly) and jay sneaks out from behind the camera to whisper twenty bucks says alex tells us to take five in the next minute in brians ear and hes right.
and tim says hes going out for a cigarette all bitchy and huffy and alex snarks at him and stomps out the front door like it doesnt also lead outside and jays 👁👁 at brian w his big stupid eyes the entire time (not a subtle bone in that boys body bless his fucking heart) and he goes so we're gonna go after them right you wanna see if theyre actually doing it right . alex fucks guys in his car a lot cuz of the hatchback i bet theyre out there . like if theyre fucking . and brian caves "but only if we're not weird about it" just for them to stand there staring for a couple minutes too long and be obviously hard when brian (red, hands in his hoodie pocket so it hangs lower, averting his eyes) knocks on the window and coughs and goes uh, my neighbors are uh. home? and like up? and opening their bli- and they both scramble out and alex tries to ?? lecture them ?? like he has any right ?? (hes ?? hard ??? too ???? he blew off filming first ?????? is brian in the fucking twilight zone ????????) until somebody tim probably pipes up that maybe they do this conversation inside?
ends up being the right decision seeing as jay cant stop telling alex hes kind of hot and jay wasnt expecting him to top and does he still keep condoms in his car or was that like a slut era thing and he didnt know tim was his type man jays kinda jealous honestly are they like exclusive bc jay was totally thinking abt hitting th- alex shoves him against the wall when they get inside and asks if hes fucking kidding or what bc he doesnt have any right to be a shit abt this and jay just looks down at his dick and then back up like :3? and brian thinks ur cute together. just sayin lol. and alex short circuits when he puts all of that together at once
didnt mean for this to get like fic length whoops
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roccosuks · 4 months
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*from the distance* Timekeeper, Timekeeper, TimekeepER-
*crash through the wall like kool aid man*
🕒Timekeeper!! I have questions for you. How were you before the parable? What's your loreee?? (sorry if this was explained before, im new here hehe)
(also i really like your Timekeeper design, so freaking cool :])
“Oh! Hello- sorry, you scared me…”
“Before the parable? Well I’m not entirely sure, I don’t remember if there even was a before the parable. But- my lore is… rather unsettling to think about. A lot of stuff has happened to me, before and after I became Timekeeper; it was torture. But, I… suppose being Timekeeper is better than when I was 432. Maybe. I have a lot more problems with my physical form, but I have a lot more freedom to do what I want than before.”
“Also… thank you for visiting me. I don’t get too many visitors and it always makes my day. :)”
(AWW TYSM. The silly guy gets a lot of compliments and I really appreciate that so many awesome people like his design. For his lore- I have a couple paragraphs here for it. So prepare for this massive info dump.)
So, I headcanon that The Narrator created TK/432. So The Narrator is the reason 432 had to suffer so much. And when he turned into Timekeeper, his code was practically getting jumbled up and torn apart; which made him a glitchy painful mess. He also noticed his new form, almost everything was different; and he noticed he didn’t have a mouth anymore. So whenever they were in pain, they couldn’t scream, they just had to suffer in silence where nobody could hear them. But as time goes on, he finds himself becoming more stable. So he only glitches when he’s overwhelmed, upset, furious, just any kind of powerful emotion.
They then find the tape room, where they make their new office. They tried making their own masks so he could talk, but a lot of them were unsuccessful, until he made the one he has now that’s fully functioning (except he doesn’t have an actual mouth and can’t eat or taste anything). He’s also trapped in the tape room now so he can’t really get out.
I’m not entirely finished with this part of his lore, but the screen on his face somehow cracked, and he started bleeding out. It was also so bad that static had started to form on his face with his injury.
Also, static is horrible. If you lightly touch it, it will sting you for a bit then wear off. But, if you keep your hand on it or whatever kind of material, it will start to spread through you and burn you then it will start to deteriorate you as well. Static also makes the object/person glitchy when it spreads, and if you start screaming while static is spreading through you, your voice will turn distorted and glitchy. I think it’s a really cool concept.
Anyway, he was in severe pain, and that’s why he said ‘help’ to the player, and also ‘will you come back to visit me?’.
So, he seems tough when he talks to the player, but that poor man has been through so much that when you get to know him, he’s very emotional.
That’s pretty much all the headcanon lore I have for him so far, but I have some regular headcanons for ya. :)
Timekeeper absolutely loves his hair. He will brag about it wherever he seems it’s appropriate.
He also hates pencils with a burning passion, and he’s also just afraid of them because he feels like they keep mocking him of when he was 432 and he felt useless. So he will actually have a breakdown and start crying.
Timekeeper hasn’t seen Stanley in person, and he’d do anything to see him.
Tk uses a feather to write instead of a pen or pencil (for obvious reasons).
Timekeeper is a really touch-starved and affectionate person. So whenever he receives affection, he cherishes it and he will keep thinking about it for awhile.
Timekeeper hates The Narrator so much that he would actually try to kill him if he could.
Also, TK’s screen was the only way to contact Stanley. So unless he finds a way to get to Stanley, there isn’t any way for him to communicate with him.
GODDAMN THATS A LOT. I hope you like all the juicy lore. You’re also more than welcome to lmk what you think of it. :)
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