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#i want to believe this is gonna work so bad but i still?? dont believe this is real im so skeptical of love and other such things
andrewknightley · 8 months
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You know one of those guys that thinks "he is one of the good ones" and is like man every time we talk i lose more trust in you :|
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arcaneyouth · 9 months
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honestly its so disheartening to regularly see shit like kinning or shifting or whatever theyre calling that get so shit on by most people, or to have the meaning change to something more tame and palatable for most people. i believe in that shit in a spiritual/religious kind of way. but unfortunately other people like me can be real fucking annoying about it in an easy to make fun of way so i probably shouldnt express that shit unless i want to be made fun of as well.
like even if they're being cringe about it and even if theyre not doing it for spiritual reasons like me maybe dont? make fun of them? for being cringe? and going "stupid idiot doesn't know its not real"?? yeah i dont think these people should be insisting this is scientific when its very much not but also like hey leave us alone maybe
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britneyshakespeare · 4 months
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i have 10 shakespeare plays left that i have not read
#of the 38 canon texts#fewer if you dont consider two noble kinsmen to be an official work?#bc it's coauthored and not included in the first folio#i read timon of athens this week#i read 11 shakespeare plays THIS YEAR. i thought i was gonna leave it at 10#but i liked the odds better if i read more this year than i had left to complete#tales from diana#i really do not know why i was so voracious reading shakespeare. well yes i do. i was lonely#and seldom left the house#much like i did the first year when i owned the riverside shakespeare and was reading at a similar rate#i guess i also got into the frenzy of 'omg i can complete this soon'#whereas when i was younger i was reading for the joy of it. skipping in any order i wanted to#this year i finally read a bunch of the plays that i felt like i cant believe i hadnt yet. you know?#knocking things off the canon. and some of the texts i still have to read#im like 'i cant believe i havent yet'#my order has been pretty arbitrary#i cant believe i havent read TITUS ANDRONICUS yet ive been wanting to read that since i first got the riverside.#that play has always interested in me especially with its bad reputation#there are just other plays i *did* read first.#i dont know which one ill read next. i think ill finish david copperfield first#ill probably still read other plays in between the rest of what i have of david copperfield (less than 300 pages)#but not shakespeare. i need to detox.#you hear that william? youre toxic#im slippin under the taste of your poison paradise#ill probably read mary queen of scots got her head chopped off by liz lochhead. its been in my bed#since it came in the mail. lol#thank you thriftbooks free book reward~
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strwbrymlkshake · 1 year
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I'M STARTING TO FEEL IT AGAIN
#mine#🎸#GIRL WHAT THE HELL/POSITIVE#our dynamic. our energy. unmatched. imm mmmmmghshfjdhfdkfj there are people in this world that actually like me#HELP he is so cute ok. going deranged fathoming the concept of me being acceptable. me being loved. for me. what the fuck#and i dont even have to do anything i just have to. be me???....??? im. hello girl. my reaction to this whole thing feels so delayed#im still processing it i guess i cannot comprehend it even. what the hell girl! so soon!?? hw. what#i have a Feeling i cant shake thats like. this is gonna go bad or something bad will happen. no matter how i reassure myself#i want to believe this is gonna work so bad but i still?? dont believe this is real im so skeptical of love and other such things#he wrote me a love letter dude if i told that to me like a year ago i would murder a guy out of pure excitement#i wish all those horrible things didnt have to happen to me first. but they made me who i am. and thats who he fell in love with i guess#we haven't begun dating yet because im so fucking balls to the wall batshit insane i have so many reservations about dating- i just#i just dont want to be there for it to go wrong again. i hate being so afraid of the horrors that i cant bring myself to partake#i wanna cry im not upset even im just so emotions . hell i AM crying rn i just cant believe this shit#mmmmdhfnfmhfkf bro i dont even. hello. what the fuck!!!/positive?? i cant even tag well rn im still comprehending everything#there is a guy in this world who wrote a love letter to ME. TO ME. AFTER ALL OF THIS. AFTER EVERYTHING. IM SO HAPPY BUT AT THE SAME TIME
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be-good-to-bugs · 8 days
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AAAAH forever stress is going to kill me one day
#the bin#i hate knowing why i feel so bad and not being able to do anything about it#im scared that ill never ever feel better. its been so long since i felt ok. im worried that ill make friends and still feel horrible all#the time and it wont matter. i cant keep doing this. im so tired of being all alone. im so tired of the constant inescapable dread#im going to figure something out. in a month ill be moved and i can start figuring everything out then#i hate not being able to focus on anything besides how bad i feel. i cant enjoy anything. theres so many shows i wanna watch but i cant#because im so distracted by this. theres so much manga i wanna read and i cant.#literally the ONLY thing that has been able to make me temporarily forget this for any amount of time is dungeon meshi#its so fucking good and it sparks so much joy that it does help but not enough. i get sad again really fast.#well. im trying really hard to manage my stress. i did the math on how much i should be getting. i know that i will have rent at least.#there are 2 weeks that i dont know what my hours will be but assuming i get 13 hours at least then i should have an ok amount for#moving. its possible theyll be worse and its possible theyll be better. im really hoping theyre better. my hours have been SO BAD recently#i dont know why. i know im not bad at my job or anything. i sont think my manager dislikes me either. he does this whenever someone#hasnt been feeling well and hell do it for a couple weeks and i think its him trying to be considerate but i have bills to pay man#technically there is a shift i could pickup but the store has a drive thru so im nervous to bc idk how that works and if im asked to do that#then ill have no idea so ive been avoiding taking any shifts like that#hopefully enough will pop up in the coming weeks and i can get some more hours. i know i can cover moving vehicle cost but idk how much#gas is gonna be so im suuuuper worried abt that. hhhh. hopefully my sister and her boyfriend can get me back the $300 they owe too#honestly idk how they werent able to afford rent but immediately after they were able to afford a 40 hour roadtrip and yimw off work#whatever. it doenst matter.#i wish i could deal with the other stuff messing me up rn but i cant fix the loneliness thing without not being alone and i cant fix that#it doesnt matter how much i tell myself ill make friends eventually or if i believe it or not. i feel bad because ive gone way too long#not hanging out with anyone and my brain cant handle it.#im gonna see if maybe i can play a game with my sister soon. or maybe i couod play smth with my younger sister even#i pkayed roblox with her for a little while. maybe she would want to again. i miss her :(
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arobinwithoutbatman · 2 months
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kyunzin · 3 months
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𝐏𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞
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character; 𝐆. 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮, 𝐆. 𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐮, 𝐅. 𝐓𝐨𝐣𝐢, 𝐒. 𝐑𝐲𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧
cw; picking up the phone while they’re fucking you (f!reader)
tags; slight voyerism/missionary position/ teasing (gojo), teasing/ doggy style/ degradation (geto), vouyerism/ degradation/ praise/ chokehold/ back shots (toji),sex tape/ voyerism/degradation/ objectification / missionary (sukuna), [yuuji makes an appearance at the end] (f!reader)
a/n; I haven’t posted in a while, if you requested it is in the making I promise, by the way if the spelling/grammar is bad it’s cause i’m writing this at 1 am my brain ain’t function properly rn
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𝐆. 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮
✰ would tease you, pick up the phone and tell the person that picked up that you’re busy while still fucking you.
“why don’t you answer it baby, it might be important?”
he smirks down at you as he watches you glare at him even though your moaning, letting out a weak “fuck you” at his childish antics.
“c’mon, all you have time do is see what they want it can be that hard”
his pace doesn’t let up and you watch in horror as he picks up the phone to answer with a devious smirk on his face. he knows you didn’t actually expect him to pick up the phone.
“this is gojo speaking, ah nanamin it’s you. sorry shes busy but I can help you”
your quick to slap your hand over you mouth and gojo feels the way you clench around him and he watches in amusement as you try to contain your noise though he’s sure the sound of his hips slapping against yours are making it through the speaker.
“yeah, I’ll be sure to pass on the message don’t worry”
once the call ends he throws the phone to the side and continues fucking you however the smirk never leaves his face. you’re sure to call nanami back and apologise for gojo’s behaviour.
𝐆. 𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐮
✰ he would tease yout at first baiting you but he wouldn’t actually pick up.
“what would they think if they heard the pathetic sounds you’re making baby, you wanna find out?”
he watches as you shake your head and whine at his suggestion from below him but he feels the way your cunt tightens around him at the idea.
“you sure baby, then why did your pussy squeeze so tight when I mentioned it, clearly you want them to hear how much of a cock hungry slut you are don’t you”
it’s the first time something like this has happened so you’re not sure if he’s actually going to pick up or not, you’re oulse raising in anticipation.
“you think I don’t feel the way your sucking me in even tighter, someone would think that you actually enjoy the idea of someone hearing you, is that what you want?”
“no sug, please” you don’t know if your pleas will work as the way his hands grip onto your waist tighter say otherwise as well as the way he starts to reach for the phone ahead your pulse increasing. you believe he’s going to follow through with the suggestion until he picks yo the phone to decline the call and you sigh in relief.
“don’t worry princess, I’m the only one that gets to hear your slutty moans”
𝐅. 𝐓𝐨𝐣𝐢
✰ would pick up straight away and make you speak to the person on the phone as he fucks you.
“tell them you’re busy, make it quick”
your not ready by the time he puts the phone up to your ear and you don’t even recognise the voice speaking to you not that you have half the brain right now as toji fucked the sense out of you but you have to comply with his wishes as you dont want to be punished even though you know hes only doing it to humiliate you.
“make sure you speak properly otherwise they won’t be able to understand you baby”
it’s hard for you to speak as he has you held up by your throat so your words come out choppy in between your moans and theres no doubt that the person on the phone can tell whats going on. “ye -fuck! hello s-sorry about that. shit, can I um -oh fuck, can I c-call you back later?”
“taking to long princess, hurry up”
“fuck! m’ trying, please! no not you -fuck sorry. m’ b-busy right now so I’m gonna call you back- fuck!” toji doesn’t wait for you to finish your sentence sending one particularly harsh thrust just before the call ends throwing it back to it’s place.
“such a good girl doing as i asked, but now they know what a dirty slut you are, taking calls while you’re being fucked”
𝐒. 𝐑𝐲𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧
✰ puts the phone next to your pussy so that the person can hear the obscene sounds then next to your mouth to hear your moans.
“keep making ‘em pretty noises for me”
you don’t even notice when he picks up the phone but you soon realise that he is holding your phone down to where his balls slap against your ass making the wettest sound and you know that he’s recording a video as he usual does when the two of you fuck, he says he saved it for when he can’t fuck you l.
“hear that it’s the sound of quality pussy, she’s sucking me in so tightly. bet you wish you were me huh?”
you don’t even have half a mind to question what he’s doing right now as even though he’s occupied with the phone he’s still fucking you brutally shaking the bed with the force of his thrusts eliciting loud and long moans from you.
“my pretty little whore can take my dick so well, she even makes the prettiest noises for me wanna hear?”
you’re not sure how long he records the sounds your pussy makes but the next thing you know is that the phone is placed next to your ear for it to hear the profanities leave your mouth one after the other a proud smirk on his face as you do “ryo please- oh fuck, feels s-so fuckin good”
“my cunt takes cock so well, pretty sure it’s all she’s good for. just to be used as my fleshlight”
you soon later come to learn that it was yuuji the video was for yuuji after hearing your moans he may or may have not fisted his cock all night in jealousy wishing it were him fucking you instead.
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𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 - 𝐉𝐔𝐉𝐔𝐓𝐒𝐔 𝐊𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐍
@tyunixia @riowmie
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baby
summary- babying your "tough" hubby rafe.. maybe some freakydeakyness at the end
note- this is the complete opposite of the rafe ive been writing about LMAOOO.. this man is SO BAD help me
it was 2am and you were in your bedroom scrolling on your phone, a random netflix show playing in the background. you've been waiting for your husband to get home for hours, being the wife to the chief of police did have its negatives. this was one of them.
you heard footsteps walking up the stairs and immediately turned off your phone, throwing the covers over yourself you pretend to be asleep. the door opens and you feel the weight of the bed shift.
"hey baby. sorry for getting home so late" rafe says giving your forehead a kiss, you jokingly ignore him.
"c'mon now i know youre awake.. get up and hold me." he begged tiredly, you couldnt help but giggle at how desperate he sounded.
"fine." you mumbled into the sheets but stayed in your position, he hugs you putting all of his weight on your body.
"okay okayy, i got it. now get off me you fatty." you whined, pushing his large frame off of you. you leaned against the bed frame and opened your arms, the both of you adjusting to a more comfortable position. which was the both of you propped up against a pillow.
"im so tired." he yawns into your chest, you played with his hair as the both of you stayed in silence.
"i know you are, you need a day off. youve been working too hard." validating him, his hand plays with the ribbon of your pajama shorts.
"see? youre still in your uniform, youre gonna make the bed dirty." you patted his back and drew circles on it.
"what, you want me take it off? if you wanted to see me naked you couldve asked sweetheart." he looked up at you and smirked. you glared at him, lightly slapping his arm.
"not what i meant.." you blushed.
"youre so cute you know that rafey, honestly when i look at you i just want to eat you." you confessed and massaged his temples, his face nuzzles into your chest even further. clearly he was blushing as well.
"i dont know how i got so lucky, im so glad i have a such a beautiful boy in my life. everything about you is just perfect." you cooed admiring his sculpted face, the way his plump lips curled into a smile.
"stopppp" he whined. you couldnt help but pull out your phone and take a picture. because if you didnt, who wouldve believe that your 6'2 husband loved to be babied like this? not like you were going to show anyone, its just for your eyes only. you wanted to cherish this moment forever.
"did you just take a picture?"
"let me see it." he shot up and reached for your phone. you put your phone under your pillow and laid on it, making sure he wasnt able to grab it. the two of you started play fighting.
"nooo please, you look so cute. let me keep it!!" you laughed, he started to tickle you. and you slowly started to fall off the bed. your legs wrapped around his waist and dragged him down, if you were gonna fall he was going to come down with you.
the laughing coming from you both died down and you looked up at him, what a funny position. you both were on the floor and he was in between your legs hovering over you.
rafe leaned downed and passionately kissed your lips, his hand starts to play with your shorts. you eventually pull away and slap his hand.
"nuh uh. go shower first. you stink." you got up to your feet then helped your boyfriend get up as well. you looked up at rafe with your head tilted, what was this man plotting?
"not unless you join me.. you cant say no" he quickly said and grabbed you by the waist. hoisting you over his shoulder and carrying you to the master bathroom.
"ahhh! rafe stop!!" you busted out laughing, kicking your feet as he practically dragged you to the shower. he put you down and turned on the warm water, it poured over you both. you furrowed your eyebrows.
"great now my clothes are all wet." you pouted crossing your arms over your now soaked tank top.
"more reason to take it off... lift your arms f'me"
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Mars Aspects, how you like to WIN
if you win,i dont win so i gotta turn my loss into yours, becsuse we can't all be winners. i didnt change my mind, just chose a better outcome, whats your choice?
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Mars aspecting sun - winning at all costs, they appear like a winner, but the means and ways they go about it are so in your face, you become impressed but simultaneoulsy concerned. but thats what gets them off. they turn the expression show dont tell, into show and tell everybody. which gives them more enemies, but also makes em more fierce. also flambouyant just to throw their enemies off lol. mars aspecting moon - they like to win behind closed doors. they want you to belive in them, simply becsuse they believe in you. its what gets them emotionally secure i guess. the security of winning. but its just confusing becsuse for example we watching tv on da couch, and your trynna pull a funny. sit down we still love you we just tired. but if you put them in there place expect a tantrum. mars aspecting mercury - basically death note. intellectual competitors/debators always playing the chess game of anything; "whats the best move here" also super entertainign speakers, can talk super fast and aggressively. also very into learning, they want to dominate the intellectual sphere. they wanna argue with everyone but no one wanna bite back lol. also > can't catch deez hands
mars aspecting venus - agrresively charming. there charisma just exudes from there aura naturally, people just laugh at these guys so easily, because they just are likeable with it. also people love it when they are angry, they just fall for em harder. but they dont like to get angry becsuse theyd rather just be charming mars aspecting jupiter - so much movement, they move like the "wacky waving inflatable arm tube man" - family guy. but seriously the way they move peopple just cant believe they move like dat, they move so strangely but hypnotically. also so much energy these guys can do a million sets in da gym and eat the whole fridge. they just got way too much energy and it shows... they also just get really lucky w competition, victory just lands in their lap lol. mars aspecting saturn - these guys are always striving to be da best at whatevrr there mind is set on. if they gotta goal, then whatsver is obstructing there path better move or they gonna trample all over it/ya. kinda intimidating. but this usually sets them back, but in the end only makes them stronger/ more fierce. because to them the fear people have of them is also getting in there way lmao. unless it works to there favour... basically control freaks and they only care about their agenda, but will pretend to have your interests in mind, just to get there ends. mars aspecting uranus - these guys are the true psychopathic freaks, everyone i know with this aspect is sadistic and also enjoys getting hit. people stay away from them, because they know they just wanna hit them lol. even when they acting nice, after like a week they show their crazy psychotic side, and everyones like yeahhhhh idk about you. but they dont mean harm they just view violence as intriguing i guess.... they like to win by fighting everyone and anyone lmao, but its play fighting, unless you try them... they really are the psychopaths; extremely calculated and precise with there attacks. they think they doing you a favour by attacking you lol. mars aspecting neptune - idk why but they always getting sexualized, probs because they are an easy target, and there submissiveness gets people going like "i can hurt them and they will literally just apoliogize :D" i feel bad for these lot, but there forgiveness really does shine through, i guess they dominate through submission... go figure. they like to win you over with their pure hearts <3 mars aspecting pluto - they literally do nothing and everyone is intimidated lmao. you can just tell these guys will not just kill you but torture you and enjoy it lol. thats why they always acting like they are not a threat, because they are begging for someone to challenge them, but they are so bad at acting innocent, everyone can tell they are a wolf in sheeps clothing. its all or nothing with them. but they choose their prey very carefully... they like to win at all costs no matta the price.
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aothotties · 6 months
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How they help you get over someone
| Eren | Armin | Reiner | Jean|
Word count: 1016
Warnings: Levi is in his 30s, car sex, mating press, pet names (mama), squirting, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex.
“But i just feel so dumb, im literally so stupid” you huffed to your gym buddy, Levi as you spotted him.
He finished his set then sat up and turned towards you 
“Y/N, you're so young. You're going to make mistakes plus you're a girl. No ones mad at you for believing what he said to you and having sex with him” he said plainly 
You always vented to Levi when you were upset and he always found a way to give you great advice and help you through everything. Him being older made it easier to trust him because you felt like he was grown grown and had it all together
“I'm mad at myself. I feel like I'm too old to still fall for the same bullshit I fell for in highschool. Were you like me at my age?” you stated as tears threatened to spill from your eyes
“ I was worse” , he responded, “don't feel bad about it. Its a normal thing for you to be upset that he fucked you then never spoke to you again, youre not the problem. Any woman, no matter what age, would be upset about that. I mean there's some succubuses out there that just smash everyone and don't feel a thing, but most women aren't like that”
You couldn't lie, levi always reassured you and made you feel better about making regular human choices and never allowed you to beat yourself up for making mistakes
You both finished your workout and left the gym. He walked out next to you and made sure you were safe in the parking lot because it was late at night. You stopped at the car and he pulled you into a hug
“You'll be alright, mama. Don't be so hard on yourself” he said and you buried your face in his chest and began to cry 
Even though his words made you feel better you were still sad. He rubbed your back and let you get it all out and refused to let go until you finished crying
You pulled away and wiped your tears on your shirt
“Thank you, i really appreciate you, Levi” you said to him once you composed yourself
“Dont worry about it, i'm always here if you need me” he responded.
You stared up at him completely enamored. You had the strongest feelings for him and had them for a while. You tried sleeping with that other guy thinking it would help you get over him but it clearly didn't work. You just ended up sad and crying in his arms which strengthened your feelings. You were convinced Levi didn't feel the same and you were too sacred to say anything in fear that it would ruin the friendship you have
“Aye aren't you glad you asked me to be your gym partner”, he said trying to change the subject
“yeah , i guess” you laughed as you responded 
“You guess? You know you wanted to be like me, that's why you approached me and asked for my help” he nudged you a little bit as he teased 
“That definitely not the reason i approached you but yeah let's go with that” you told on yourself before you even had the chance to realize it
He looked down at you and smirked as he nodded, “ yeah i know”
He confirmed in that moment that he knew exactly how you felt about him and apparently he felt the same because he grabbed you by your wrist and pulled you towards his car
Levi drove a nice white tesla and you had been dying to see the inside 
He had you in the back seat folded completely in half as he pressed his weight onto you 
His dick was reaching so far inside you that your mind went blank. All you could do was moan his name while he fucked you at a steady pace.
Sweat rolled down his abs as he was sliding in and out of your dripping wet pussy. He was mesmerized by the way you were sucking him in. He was also taken aback at how good your body looked folded under him.
Sometimes at the gym he would make slick comments about your ass but you never realized it was his way of telling you he felt the same.
“Fuck Levi, r-right there. Im gonna cum baby” you whined as you grabbed his biceps 
His pace didn't change and he continued to fuck you all the way to your peak
“Mmhmm mama, cum for me” he said as he watched your face contort in pleasure
Your high flooded over you and you came hard all over his thick cock. You felt bad that you squirted on his perfectly clean seats but he couldn't care less. He wanted to see you cum for him over and over again and didn't care about what happened to his car.
He never let up and kept going until you came for him multiple times. Each time you came a mantra of praises left his lips. 
His pace became more erratic as he came close to his climax. You could feel his dick throbbing inside you as he was about to cum
“ gonna cum inside you mama, f-fill you up real good” he stated between deep grunts
He slammed into you hard one last time then you felt as his hot thick cum spilled inside you. He slid out and watched as it pooled out of you but he quickly pushed it back in with his fingers.
You both threw your clothes on and you stepped out of his car and wobbled as you tried to stand up straight. He laughed at you and shook his head. He put his arm around you and walked you to your car 
He leaned down and pressed a kiss on your forehead 
“Best cardio i've ever done” he stated as he opened the door for you 
You hopped in your car and deleted the other guy's number knowing damn well he did not match up to Levi in any way.
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be-good-to-bugs · 2 months
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yeah ok having my pronouns respectfully feels pretty fuckin good
#the bin#ive been really fed up with everyone i know using exclusively she/her so i changed my nametag to say just say he/him insteds of he/she#i usually dont even wear my nametag bc it always getd wet and it just smudges but im supposed to so im just gonna redraw it everytime before#i leave for my next shift. it doesnt bother me from my coworkers bc like. they dont know. but everyone else in my life never used he him for#me. today was the first day i wore a he/him nametag and both my coworkers i was working with like. apologized to me if they offended me by#calling me girl and stuff and. idk. its just nice that they noticed and cared. i wasnt expecting anybody to notice at all really#and i told them that they can still use she/her f9r me but i prefer for people to use both. idk. i hate being seen as JUST a girl.#im a boy too. its not about what im not. its not about what pronouns make me unhappy. its about what i am and what does make me happy#i knew the one coworker wpuld be chill abt it bc she has a trans kid who shes supportive of but the other one i wasnt sure#i heard her make some comment abt they them pronous referring to a specific person but it was cleatly petsonal business so like#it seemed kinda transphobic but i dont have any of the context snd she seemed really chill before that so i figured it just sounded bad#out of context and i was right so thats reassuring.#i dont have gender dysphoria but it still fuckibg hurts when people refuse to respect who i am. i wanna tell people im a boy and a girl and#they respect and believe me when i say it. i do have some people in my life who do but they always default to girl me#and like. i know i look super feminine and i dress super feminine. plus i am still a girl. but the boy part of me is just as important#most of the time im actually presenting the boy side of myself. the boy inside me oikes to wear frilly clothes and the girl inside me wants#to become a shadow. but people look at me and ofc think girl.#idk. its beens hard to get the people i know to actually care and respect my gender and everything bc i havent like changed my name#and i dont present any differently and i still use she her in addition to he him. so they think the additons im asking them to respect arent#important. if some of the time its exactly the same as before then thats fine. but literally never ever referring to me as a boy and with#he him pronouns is bad. just bc she her and being a girl dont make me feel bad abt myslef doesnt mean you dont have to also acknowledge#the he him boy parts of me. like. dont a deserve that basic respect? idk.#i mostly changed my nametag to jsut make myslef feel a bit better. like at least something refers to me that way. something sees me as a boy#even if its just my nametag i wrote myself#but it was definitely worth it
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hazerun3 · 1 month
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I just saw your post about the difference between passive and swan. I'd like to ask the difference between young swad and dream?
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shittier doodle this time cuz Im getting tired but the ramblings are probably more unhinged
I dont have particularly strong feelings on dream so this is gonna be mostly younger swad and comparisons to dream when needed
-Views social interaction as inherently transactional and as a game that he can learn to play (he doesnt realise that in the village he was never going to be a player on equal ground, this is why after his ascension his persona is more deity ified rather than a king or smth like nm cuz he wants to be Above it all and in control.)
-Been obsessed with swan even as passives (His Duty to help people got drilled into him, the village feels entitled to his help and swad slowly grows tired of them, but his little brother is always kind to him and doing things for him feels so much more rewarding [tho eventually the village tries to stifle any attempts swad does to get something nice for his brother which frustrates swad so much and swan not asking for anything and just being happy to see him and trying so hard just to make swad happy, even as hes hurt fuels this.] so the mix of the sense of duty, him being the older brother so self imposing a sense of responsibility and swan being nice to him leads him to adopt a mentality where Swan is the only one whos special and actually cares about him not just what he can do for him, but with the way hes raised by the village he tries desperately to try and do something for swan in return cuz he still feels like hes failing in his part of the social bargain)
-Also the cult village placed sooooo much value on stuff like never being angry, always being happy :), youre not allowed to be mean, you Must be hardworking all the time, visibly showing that youre sad is Evil. And swad seethes constantly cuz no one in this fucking village follows that and the one person who embodies all these values the most is swan (who everyone still hates for reasons inexplicable to swad, who believes theres still a way to get swan out of his outcast status if the village just realises that swan is the kindest soul in this rotten place.)
-Dream maintains a more "child" status in the village even as hes older than when swad fights to "adult" status, seeing it as a way to get more social power cuz he picked up that Adults have more power than Children but lol not for him, he just gets to have more responsibilites, the expectation to cut off swan and no money OR gifts for his work cuz gifts are for children doing chores not working adults and since its both swads duty and the fact that he doesnt have anything to spend it on that wouldnt be spending it unwisely they just dont pay him at all! and also hes an object not an adult to them so rushing to try and be an adult backfired miserably
-Swad loves listening to swan read stories to him, reallly wants to be the Prince who saves the damsel and sets his enemies on fire and he projects that persona
-Both he and dream were taken hunting I think, but dream didnt take to it (he had a knack for archery but as soon as he was told to turn that arrow on an innocent bunny he couldnt do it, his more "child" status helps him get out of it) swad was also aprehensive at first but since he places a lot of importance in being the Older Brother and being responsible (also he wants to kill people) so he shoots the bunny, he feels bad and cries about it to swan but he cant let go of the feeling, the smell of blood, the idea of that being someone who hurt swan
-in my head he killed people already lol (used the hunting trips as cover but his hit list is soooooo long and he gets less and less opportunity...)
-he loves shiny things so much but being materialistic and greedy is one of the sins, swan cant get him anything but he does press little flower ornaments for his brother and so much flower jewlery so that swad can roleplay being a prince.
-he hates everyone soooooooo much <3
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hyuuukais · 2 months
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-`♡´ - APARTMENT 143
pairing -> lee minho x fem reader
synopsis -> after a bad breakup, y/n needs to find a new place to live. although she's grateful for her best friend, up-and-coming model hwang hyunjin, for letting her stay at his, she can't keep living with him and his model roommates. so when an opening for somewhere nearby with cheap rent opens up, she jumps on it, despite knowing next to nothing about the 3 other tenants, only that one owns 3 cats. the three quickly learn of her breakup, determined to help get her back on her feet. but what happens when one of them begins to develop feelings?
warnings -> gen, energy is tenseee
MASTERLIST | PREVIOUS | NEXT
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN -> PEOPLE DON'T CHANGE (partially written! wc: 1.4k)
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You sigh, placing your phone next to you as you slide down further into your pillows. Time is running out to ask Minho, you know that, and Lily has been pressing too. The deadline for offering interviews lingers sooner than when they start. With a groan, you swing your feet over the edge of your bed and slip them into the bunny slippers previously kicked off at the end of your bedframe, trudging to your door.
Minho is already pouring a cup of coffee into a dark brown mug when you enter the kitchen, wearing his normal work attire; a tight black t-shirt tucked into black jeans and a belt. Sometimes you were jealous of the simplicity. He doesn't notice you lean on the island, back facing you. When he does turn around, he startles, the tiniest drop of hot coffee running down the side of his mug and seeping under his hand. He doesn't hiss at the burn, doesn't even flinch, just puts the mug down and wipes his hand on the cloth hanging off the oven door.
"Dont sneak up on people, it's not nice," he says, replacing the cloth.
You perk up at his voice. "We're talking again, good, that's good. Listen, I deeply apologize for what I said and I don't even believe that, you know? I'm sure your ex loved you a lot. There was definitely a really good reason for her to hide her husband from you. Maybe he sucked! In any case, you're a great guy, so why wouldn't she choose you?"
Taking a deep breath, you refocus yourself. Minho is staring at you from above his mug, blowing gently on the hot liquid. There's still tension between you two, the air thick and hot.
"Was there a point to all that?" He asks bluntly.
"Yes, um. This is bad timing, but have you decided if you're doing Lily's thing or not yet...?" He sets his mug down with a sigh. "Of course, it's okay if you don't want to! Deadlines are coming up though so she needs an answer whether you're doing it or not."
He takes his time answering, sipping his coffee, running a hand through his hair, stretching. Part of you is getting frustrated. How hard is it to say a simple yes or no? Either he's doing it or not, there's not exactly a grey area.
"I'll do it," Minho finally answers, and you barely contain a squeal of excitement.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" You run around the island and hug him, nearly knocking over your stool in the process.
It's short-lived, pulling away to see Minho's face painted red, no doubt mimicking your own. Clearing his throat, he nods at you and grabs his coffee, turning away from you. You're about to leave when you remembered what prompted you to seek him out in the first place.
"We're having a game night tonight if you want to join? It's just gonna be the boys, Hyun, NingNing, and I invited Soobin too." You lean against the wall of the hallway leading to your rooms, waiting for a response.
"Ah, I might be working late again, but I'll see what Jeongin is up to. Is it okay if I..." He shakes his head. "Never mind, forget that. I'll either see you or I won't."
"Okaaay," you give him two thumbs up, but immediately put them back down when he gives you a weird look.
-
Game night is in full swing by ten with snacks and drinks taking up the island and bodies filling up the couch. A pile of UNO cards sit messily in the middle of the table, NingNing taking it upon herself to tidy it up every so often, even if it only stays like that for a couple of turns. You're so close to calling UNO, smirking as you place down another pick-up-4 card and watch as Soobin's head slowly turns to look at you with fake disdain. He keeps eye contact as his hand reaches for the deck, barely containing his own smile as he glares at you, and you can't help but giggle.
All night has been like this- teasing Soobin and getting him used to your friends now that you've become a bit more serious. His training under you has finally ended, so you feel less guilty about the whole thing. The only thing is that you still haven't shared it with your boss, but that's a problem for another day. Right now, all you can think of is the way Soobin has his free hand over yours, thumb caressing the back of your hand and only taking it away to place a card down. He fits in nicely with everyone, almost like he's always been there... which makes sense seeing as he was already friends with Beomgyu.
"UN-" you're attention turns to the two bodies walking through the front door, "-oh."
In comes Minho with a girl you don't recognize hanging off his arm, in their own world as they kick their shoes off and laugh at something she whispers in his ear. Neither seem to notice the big group around the table until the girl gives a little, and uncomfortable, wave. Minho has his arm wrapped around her waist tightly, and you follow his gaze to where Han and Beomgyu sit. On their faces are matching angry stares, Han with his mouth open slightly.
"You're kidding," Beomgyu scoffs. "Tell me you're kidding, Min."
"I forgot you were having a game night," Minho shifts.
"Don't ignore the question." You look at Beomgyu, anxiety crawling up your throat. "Why is she here? And why are you acting so... couple-y?"
Han stands, and you can see his hands are shaking. "You got back together?"
"Oh, come on," the girl speaks for the first time, a look of annoyance on her face. "We always get back together."
"I wasn't talking to you-" Han points a finger at her, then directs it to Minho. "You, explain."
"No," Minho sighs. "I don't think I need to. If you're unhappy with your own love lives, you don't need to project onto me. None of you can say shit about relationships here. You're sneaking around because you're ashamed, and Y/n is only with Soobin because she can't get over her ex. Just to name a few."
You avoid eye contact with Soobin, a pang of hurt in your chest, glaring at Minho.
"I'm not unhappy," you say, feeling Soobin squeeze your hand. "You have no right to comment on my relationships because you're jealous."
Hurt flashes over Minho's face for a millisecond, quickly covered by a stoic expression. "Why would I be jealous? People can change-"
"Like hell, they can." Beomgyu stands now, circling around the table and past the couch to get into his personal space. "You said it yourself you don't believe that! And what about your husband?" He looks the girl in the eye and you hear NingNing gasp; you forgot to tell her. "What does he think of all this?"
"We're divorcing," she answers quietly, looking down at the floor. "He wasn't good for me. Not like you'd understand, or even take the time to try and understand."
Her voice turns watery at the end of the sentence, orange hair shielding her face as she curls into Minho's chest. From the shudder of her body, you can tell she's starting to cry. You almost feel bad for her. Taking in her words, you feel there's more to the story than what you know and what the others are willing to listen to, but you're already to upset to care. Han joins Beomgyu, placing a hand on his shoulder.
"Maybe we should leave it alone."
"And maybe he should leave, take his princess back to her tower," Beomgyu spits.
Minho's eyes turn dark, jaw clenching. He's holding back hurtful comments, just barely. After another moment of tense staring, Minho breaks eye contact and leads the girl- his ex- back to the front door. Slipping on his shoes, he helps her with her own when her hands prove to be too shaky to tie the laces. When he leaves the room is completely silent, Beomgyu taking a seat next to Hyunjin on the couch and Han walking away down the hall, the sound of a door slamming following his departure.
-
notes -> maybe we were quick to judge his ex...? maybe.......?
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^^^ orange means i can't tag you
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i don't know if you're taking requests (feel free to delete if you're not!!) but could you maybe do leo with a child of hypnos who learned morse code for him and yk, confesses like that??
⋆⭒˚.⋆ a sleepy sunday kinda love; leo valdez x daughter of hypnos! reader blurb
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content: leo valdez x daughter of hypnos! reader warning: none, i don't think author's note: so so soft, i love this one so much. i also realized too little too late that you said child, instead of daughter. but i had kinda already written it in a female manner, which i feel so bad about!!! and i almost wrote this as hcs when you said blurb ugh this ask has taken so many turns lol AND I WAS SO EXCITED FOR THIS ONE BC I AM BUT A SLEEPY GIRL IN A NOT SLEEP WORLD also i should wait to post this one for sunday bc like the vibes, but i dont have that kinda patients
sunday mornings were set aside for lovers, that much you were certain. so many songs sang of it, so it must be true. 'a sunday kid of love' by etta james. 'sunday morning' by maroon 5. i mean, you get the point, right?
those were the few mornings you allowed yourself to actually sleep in before another long week, cuddled up on leo's chest. waking up slowly and softly felt like going to church; something scared that even the gods couldn't touch, some repetition that kept away the mundane and boring. something holy to believe in, to dive head first into.
"morning, sleepy head," leo mused, in that early morning voice that always left you buzzing. you didn't reply, just squeezing closer to his side as he pressed his kisses to your temple.
"whatcha want for breakfast?" he breathed out, his eyes resting closed but a soft smile on his lips as his fingers flirted with your sleep tank top and the waist band of your matching shorts. even though you were a daughter of hypnos, it never failed to amazing leo how many matching pajama set you had or how you always managed to look godlike in them. he's never seen someone make sweatpants work as well as you do.
"you already know what im gonna say," you muttered against leo's neck and he could feel as your lips twitched upwards into a tiny smile.
"pancakes coming right up, princess," leo hummed, though he didn't move an inch. he wasn't quite ready to leave the soft bed or, more importantly, you.
"i make the coffee and tea, you make the pancakes?" you offered, eyes drooping as you continued to lay against his chest. these positions in the kitchen were already set in place, but you always asked. and leo always hummed back, like he did today. still, no movement from either of you in the bed for a few more minutes.
"we gotta get up," you yawned out, forcing yourself to sit up and attempting to escape the bed but leo jolted forwards, wrapping his arms around you and dragging you back into the bed. not that you gave much of a fight.
"in a few. shush, sleeping boy here," joked leo, pressing a kiss to your shoulder before snuggling back into his pillows. you brought your fingers up to where leo's arms were, ghosting them over the skin there before smiling to yourself, determined to show leo your new trick.
.. / .-.. --- …- . / -.-- --- ..- / -… ..- - / .-- . / --. --- - - .- / --. . - / ..- .--.
(i love you, but weve gotta get up)
you could feel leo shift from behind you as you tapped this pattern, smiling to yourself as you could basically hear the cogs in his brain turning.
"we don't have to do anything, this is our house," leo huffed but you could hear the smile in his voice as he leaned over you, looking into your eyes with so much adoration in his own, "and when did you learn that, huh?"
you just smiled up at him, reaching your hand up to his cheek and beginning to tap your fingers there.
.. / -.. --- -. - / -.- .. … … / .- -. -.. / - . .-.. .-.. / …- .- .-.. -.. . --..
(i dont kiss and tell, valdez)
"whatever, keep your secrets," leo mused, rolling his eyes, before leaning down and capturing your lips in a soft and gentle kiss.
yeah, soft sunday mornings were your favorite. especially with a boy like leo valdez.
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