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torialefay · 9 days

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"Regardless of That Fucking Assignment..." 📝

professor!seungmin x fem!student!reader smut 🔞

✨ synopsis: you tried to be professional after being selected for a position under the hottest professor on your univeristy’s campus. turns out, the professor doesn’t give a fuck about “professional.”

✨ warnings: this piece, although consensual, does revolve around a morally grey area. this is strictly fictional work, and should only be considered as such. contains a lot of roleplaying that is not appropriate for everyday life. I do not condone any acts that are represented in this fic. this is strictly fictional work, and should only be considered as such. ; unprotected sex, semi-public sex, slight breath play

Dr. Kim was easily the hottest professor at your university. Young, handsome, and intelligent were the perfect recipe for quickly becoming your favorite classes to go to.

Thankful that he actually taught courses for your major, people outside of it would still sign up just to see him. Well, more like fawn over him, in hopes that he would somehow notice and fall for them, like the clichés they’d seen in movies. It was a bit annoying, considering you’d have to make sure to register early for his classes, but you didn’t mind as long as you got your spot. It made your performance in his class look better in comparison at least.

You’d always performed well in his classes, but you always felt a bit behind. You’d considered asking for his opinion on who would be best to go to for tutoring, but you didn’t want to get flustered in front of him. You surely didn’t want him to think you were struggling in his classes because it was hard to pay attention to anything but him… But ultimately, that was the truth.

Which is why you were very surprised one day to receive an email saying that you’d been selected for the fellowship you applied for… with Dr. Kim as the head.

“Hello, Dr. Kim,” you said nervously after knocking and peaking your head into his office.

He was relaxed, seated behind his large mahogany desk with a plaque on the front ordained with the inscription “Dr. Kim Seungmin.” He’d had a pen in one hand while holding his chin with the other, lost in thought.

“Ahh, y/n. Come on in and take a seat,” he smiled, lifting his head out of his hands and gingerly resting the pen onto the paper underneath it.

You shyly opened the door wider in front of you, just enough so that you could glide through and carefully close it.

Afterwards, you smoothed your skirt down around your thighs and crossed the short space of the room before seating yourself in one of the nice, leather-backed chairs that he had placed neatly in front of his desk.

“I’m glad you could meet with me on such short notice,” he said warmly, looking you in the eyes.

You couldn’t help but blush a little. Even if you’d had around a hundred lectures with him under your belt, it was nothing like the one-on-one conversation you were having now. Butterflies crept up into your stomach that you quickly tried to shoot back down. If you were going to work with this man on a fellowship project for the next year, you were going to have to learn to set those feelings aside… starting now.

“Yes, of course,” you said formally. “I’m very thankful and excited that I was chosen for this position. It really does mean a lot to me, so thank you for giving me this opportunity,” you smiled back, hiding any nerves that you may have had.

Dr. Kim chuckled a bit. “No need to thank me. You’re a great student. I’m always happy to see your work. You have a lot of great ideas, you know? I don’t say that many students challenge me to think about things in a different way, but you’re… different. Very different,” he smirked.

You automatically felt your face flush. ‘Surely this will get easier with time,’ you reassured yourself, taking a deep breath as nonchalantly as possible.

“Oh really?” you began, calming your voice. “I do get worried sometimes that maybe people could find my work a bit… unconventional?” you raised an eyebrow, trying not to falter.

“Good thing I’ve never been the conventional type,” he winked as he smiled, looking down directly after to grab the paper sitting next to him.

‘Did he? Did he just?…’ your mind began running. ‘Surely he didn’t mean it like… No, there’s no way. That’s just his personality. He’s witty. Of course he’d play around like that. He’s just cool, calm down.’ You tried your best not to let your internal freak out show on your exterior.

“So,” he started, looking back up to you, “give me your ideas. Obviously on your application, you threw out quite a few interesting ones. As long as I agree, we can work on whatever you’d like this year.”

“Hmm, well…” you began before running through your list of ideas with him. You had one proposal that you’d been fixated on, but it would require a lot of effort and attention, and you weren’t sure about the logistics of it working out. It would required a lot of time from the professor as well, so you’d almost nixed it altogether. Something about it just kept coming back though, you you figured you’d at least mention it along with the plethora of other ideas that had been rattling around.

“Woah, woah- stop right there,” Dr. Kim put his hands out, preventing you from continuing on to another point. “That’s really good,” he nodded his head. “I’ve read up on so much, paper after paper. But no one’s ever done that before.” He sucked in his cheeks as he continued to lightly nod and fixate his eyes off into the distance. “That’s smart… that’s really really smart.” He smiled, bringing his eyes back to yours now. “I knew I chose the right one. You're really impressive."

"Ohh no," you said, blushing with a smile as you waved your hand in disagreeance.

"What, you don't think so?" He teased, leaned back in his seat. "Why's that?"

"I'm just really interested in it is all. It's not that I'm special."

"Ahh," he nodded, understanding. "Well, I disagree. I noticed you the very first class. I even remember what you were wearing."

The sudden comment had you taken aback. "Really?" you asked, wide-eyed.

"Of course. You're quite memorable."

Your heart kept speeding up in your chest. 'Calm down. Calm down.'

"Come on, Dr. Kim, you don't need to say all that," you tried to play it off. "I appreciate building my confidence up, but I will always try to work harder," you finished with a solid nod.

He stilled for a moment as if contemplating his words. "Oh really? Work harder?"

“Well… of course?” your voice carried up, confused on why that was such a notable statement. “I could always be doing better in your class.”

Dr. Kim nodded. “Mmm, I guess that’s true. Tell me, y/n, whose class is your favorite? You can be honest with me. I’m just curious to know.” He cocked a brow.

“Hmm…” your eyes darted up as you began to think. “I’m not saying this to be facetious, but I really *do enjoy coming to your lectures. Dr. Pramal’s lectures have been very good recently as well.

He giggled. “Dr. Pramal? Come onnn, he basically wear a toupee. My classes have to be at least a little more fun than his.”

“I don’t know,” you smiled, “He tells a lot of dad jokes. He may give you a run for your money.” You raised your brows are his daringly.

“Ahh, okay. Dad jokes. I’ll have to remember that. That’ll get me some brownie points then huh?”

“It just might,” you shrugged. “I think the class would really enjoy it.”

A smug smirk came over his face. “I didn’t mean brownie points with the class. I meant brownie points with you.”

“Ohh,” you blushed, looking down. There was no way, you thought, that he meant the words the way that they were coming across. But it did fluster you anyways. “But I guess… haha yeah, I guess maybe that’d put you ahead of Dr. Pramal… maybe.”

Lighthearted. This was the way to go, you thought.

“Playing hard to get… I see how it is,” he grinned ear to ear.

“Hey, we’ve gotta see how good those jokes are first!”

“Alright, fair enough. I’ll get some good ones prepared for next time. Just for you.”

At that moment, there was no denying it anymore. There was no way, unless he was absolutely toying with you, that he’d be making all of these advances without realizing. You were sure he knew that almost every person was crushing on him, so you weren’t sure if he was just trying to play around, but either way, you knew that if you had been standing, your knees would have already buckled and given in. There was no going back now.

“Well,” you began, “since I shared my opinion, I think it’s only fair for you to tell me which classes are your favorites to teach?” You felt bolder now. More confident.

“Hmm… I wouldn’t say that I have any one favorite. They all have their pros and cons… but right now,” he tapped his pen on the table, “maybe I prefer the ones that you’re in. It always makes my day a bit better, but the classes go by so quickly.”

“So you decided giving me this position would be a good solution?” You giggled, leaning into the fantasy unfolding in front you.

“Absolutely not,” he stood with a smirk, gingerly beginning to walk behind where you were seated. “Excuse the language, but you’re fucking brilliant. It’s why I was so drawn to you... Having you on was a unanimous decision by the board.” He leaned down behind you until he was hovering just next to your ear. “But this…” he breathed out. “This is just a bonus.”

He took one hand to gently brush your hair over the opposite shoulder, making sure the area beneath him was open and exposed. He slowly let his fingers trail along your back until they rested on your shoulder, only for a split second, before sneaking lightly to trace along the lines of your collar bone. You could hear deep breaths coming from his throat.

“Tell me you don’t want it, and I’ll stop…” he whispered lowly.

Your head clouded. Never in your wildest dreams did you imagine any of this. You wanted this, didn’t you? Yes, you wanted this.

But how would it affect your future? What if someone found out?

His hot breath hitting your ear drowned out any hesitancy you could have had. ‘Fuck it.’

“Don’t stop,” you whispered back, feeling shy, but excitement leaking out of you nonetheless.

He slowly let his lips find their way to your shoulder, planting the lightest kiss you’d ever felt, as if he was testing out the waters. As you began to get chills, he slowly began trailing kisses across your collarbone and to your neck, taking time there so gently suck. Nothing too crazy. Nothing too harsh. He wanted no evidence left behind. No emotions involved.

And that is exactly what you believed. Before he leaned in to kiss you.

His arm reached to rotate your shoulders towards him as he brought his lips to yours. The passion he poured in was immaculate. Like he’d been hungry for weeks. He tugged at your bottom lip with his teeth, asking permission to go even deeper.

Without breaking the kiss, the walked around to the front of the chair, holding your head steady for him the entire way. Once he reached his destination, you let his tongue find its way into your mouth. He started with light circles around your own until he was quickly moaning into you. The desperate sounds leaving his mouth had you echoing, making you squirm even more.

You could feel yourself growing more and more wet with each second. Swallowing in every last moment, you basked in the bliss of it all, but you couldn’t help but to want more.

He smiled as he realized how worked up you were getting. Resting one hand on your cheek and the other around to the small of your back, he guided you up until you were standing.

He slowly waltzed you around, never breaking the contact with your mouth. As the moans grew heavier and heavier, you slowly began to push yourself up and onto his leg, needing any sort of friction possible.

He took that as his cue to extend his thigh out for you, running his hands down to hold your ass before rubbing it harshly.

You winced at the new pressure as you slowly began to push yourself up and down on his thigh, losing your breath at how good it felt.

The scene in front of him was quickly getting too much to handle. You knew from the growing hard on that you felt each time your leg hiked higher.

As he groaned loudly, he pulled his lips from yours and yanked your body into his, separating any centimeter of space that could have existed.

You let out a low whine in response as his lips went back to your neck, nibbling away as you fucked yourself onto him. His fingers burrowed into your hair as he went, encouraging you to go faster.

You reveled in the way your clit was engorged now, making sure to hit just high enough with every thrust. And as he began to pant more heavily, Dr. Kim moved his thigh up and down for you, adding to the intensity that you felt.

“Oh fuckkkk,” you let out when things were getting too much to bear.

The sweet sounds coming out of you were too much for him. Abruptly, he pulled his lips from your neck, taking hold of your head to bring it eye level with his. He stared into you like he now owned you. “You can’t tell anyone about this. Promise me,” he demanded, rutting his leg up into you, forcing you to take it as he watched..

“I promise,” you breathed out, grappling to his chest as your eyes rolled back, about to reach your high.

“Feels that good?” He chuckled, planting a harsh smack to your ass.

“Oh fuck,” you winced, loving the roughness he was giving you. Your face flew into his chest. “It feels so fucking good. Harder… please.”

“Harder?” His voice was raised now.

In any normal situation, you would have been worried that someone would hear. But in this moment, you couldn’t have given a fuck if you tried.

Another smack left you dripping through your panties. “Fu-u-u-ck,” you cried. You knew you wouldn’t last much longer. You held onto him tightly as the knot in your stomach formed. “Keep going, keep going,” you whimpered out, chasing your release.

You heard him grunt as he began thrusting harshly, as quickly as he could, into your cunt. Although you couldn’t see his face, you knew he was enjoying every last second.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,” you let out lowly as your clit throbbed in just the right way. The warmth got to be too much. The thrusts were too much, and suddenly, you lost it.

Flailing out all over him, you tried your best to cling on and ride out your high. The sexual tension that had been pent up for so long had finally spilled out- hard. You began shaking and crying out into him, not caring if you were too loud now or if anyone heard.

Once it was beginning to be too much, you pulled off, shaking and pushing him back. You were sure you couldn’t take one more second without passing out.

He took the opportunity of being separated from you to make the few strides toward his door to lock it. You couldn’t believe that you’d completely disregarded that once you’d been caught up in the moment.

Catching your breath, you turned around to grip onto his desk, holding yourself up with your arms. You were able to get a few deep breaths in until the professor returned behind you, pulling your ass toward him.

“Fuck,” he smiled, gripping your hips and squeezing, letting your ass push against his clothed dick. “That was so fucking beautiful.”

All you could do was moan in response, rolling your hips around. Although your heart had had a few seconds to calm down, you could feel it speeding right back up.

As he massaged you with his hands, he continued letting his thoughts turn into words. “Now I want to know how beautiful you’d look on my dick. Getting fucked right into this desk. Will you let me?” His hands ran up and down between your hips and your ass, rubbing you lightly. Almost as if he was… cherishing you?

“Mmhmm,” was all you could get out, still trying to fully recover.

“I need to hear you say it,” he barked back. “I need to hear you say yes. Say that you want this.”

“Yes, Dr. Kim,” you breathed out as harshly as you could, your response landing you another smack on the ass as he brought his hand to the back of your head to push it onto the desk and have you perfectly bent over for him.

He wasted no time, undoing his belt and letting his trousers fall to the ground, quickly pulling his cock out from his boxers to let it spring up and hit him.

He hastily threw the bottom of your skirt over your ass to reveal your panties underneath, completely soaked in the middle from the time you’d just had.

“Goddamn,” he chuckled. “All of this for me?” He rubbed his thumb up and down your slit, causing you to wince, before ripping your panties to the side. It caused them to partially rip, not that you minded. “Even prettier than I could have imagined,” he said, licking his lips and staring down at your pussy. “Fuck.”

He took one hand from you long enough to spit in it and bring it down to stroke his hardened cock. He moaned the slightest bit, touching himself while thinking of what was to come.

Using one hand to hold you down and the other to steady as he lined himself up at your entrance, he pushed in slowly, letting himself enjoy the feeling of your pussy stretching around him. He savored every last centimeter that he could get inside of you before bottoming out. A large breath escaped his lungs as he tried to stabilize himself. It was all too much of a sight to behold.

Pushing you into the table harder, he inched his way out before thrusting back in, trying to warm you up to him.

You couldn’t deny how delicious it felt. He was bigger than you were used to, and the way he had you pressed down was taking your breath away. You tingled head to toe from the sensation. It was better than anything you could have dreamed up in class- a few thrusts of his dick inside of you, and you could already confirm.

He picked up his speed inside of you as you let out a whimper, already feeling like you’d taken much more than he could give.

He railed into you relentlessly, letting out gutteral grunts and moans with each snap of his hips into yours. The sounds of it were lewd, but it only added to how you felt.

“Ahh fuck, you feel so fucking good,” he growled lowly, trying to focus enough so that he wouldn’t cum right away. “You’re taking it so fucking well.” He moved a hand up to your hair to form a pony tail that he could pull back on. “Don’t you think so?” he yelled, pulling your hair slightly back.

Surprised, you yelped, which only turned him on more. “Yes, Dr. Kim,” you managed to get out between shallow breaths. You didn’t know how much more you could take.

“You like it when your professor fucks you, don’t you? You always wanted to be used by me, huh?” he teased, thrusting into you even faster, tighter hold on your hair.

“Yes- yes, I love it,” you strained.

Something in him must have ticked because before you could process what was happening, you had been pulled up by your hair so that your back was arched, torso now fully upright. The professor now had a hold on your hair, but all the way around your waist as well to hold you up.

You felt yourself choke on your own throat from how far back your head had been tilted. The iron grab you felt from him behind you hinted that this would be something you’d have to get used to. He chuckled as you gasped for air, beginning to pound into you harder.

He admired the way you looked for him. Perfect ass slapping against him at every thrust. Your body contorted in the most unnatural shape, just because he willed it. Your face red from the blood rushing around. So perfectly behaved for him. Letting him do whatever he wanted. So willing to give it all up. He couldn’t fucking stand it anymore.

Relentlessly he growled, fucking into you harder than he had before. He could feel the sweat seeping from his brow, but it didn’t hinder him. All that mattered in this moment was using you until he couldn’t stand anymore. Each thrust into your tight pussy brought him closer and closer.

It was the hardest you’d ever been fucked. You were past the point of return. After moaning harder than you’d ever thought possible, you were officially fucked out. He kept hitting the same perfect spot over and over until all you could do was cry out and gasp for air. No thoughts anymore, just needing that second wave of relief. You clenched around him as you tried for a deep breath, quickly working your way there.

“Ahh shit,” he hissed as he felt you- pure, unadulterated, untamable lust now clouded his eyes. Something different had come over him now. He was no longer your professor. No. Now… his one purpose in life was to fuck you senseless.

“Do you have any idea how many times I’ve wanted to do this?” he spat at you, yanking your head back even harder so he could get a clear look into those pretty eyes while he rammed into you. “How many times I’ve wanted to stop in the middle of class to just bend you over and take you?! I’ve contemplated so many times if I should hold you back after class so I could talk to you. Get you to put those pretty lips on mine, ah?” He was aggressive, almost yelling out of his mind through gritted teeth. "I’ve wanted you from the very first day I fucking saw you. Last year. An entire fucking year of acting good,” a harsh pound into you, “and acting professional,” pound, “around you," pound. "But goddamn it, I just can’t do it anymore! You drive me fucking crazy, y/n! You drive me so fucking crazy!” He yelled forcefully, quickly releasing his grip on you so that you fell forward onto the table.

Your lungs sucked in as much air as possible as you had a momentary sense of relief. But within a few seconds, Dr. Kim was reaching with his hand to rotate your head around to the side, right next to his own as he’d bent himself over your body, still fucking into you with all the strength he had.

“I’ve got to fucking have you,” his voice rumbled lowly, looking into your eyes. The words alone made your pussy quiver.

'Fuck. There's no fucking way. Does he mean?...' You were sure you were going to cum any second.

“Tell me I can have you… Fucking hell, tell me I can have you,” he growled, watching you desperately. Hungrily.

You closed your eyes as they slightly rolled back in your head. “Yes… Fuckkk, yes, you can have me,” you moaned out as his thrusts became too much for you to handle.

He violently crashed his lips into yours as if he’d been starving for them this whole time- like he'd been saving his appetite for this very moment. He ate at you like you were the most delicious thing he would ever taste.

And with the perfect thrust, you felt it. The feeling that had been creeping up for so long, exploded now, leaving you in complete shambles. Cursing, moaning, throwing yourself all around, you just couldn’t control yourself any more. You tried pulling yourself back, but his mouth kept you anchored to him, resulting in you throwing all of your groans into his mouth.

You didn’t know how it couldn’t be over, but he growled as he finished fucking into you, the wet sounds of your release only adding to his pleasure. You were getting overstimulated to the point that you were sure you were going to cry.

“Ahhh,” you wailed, not able to handle it any more.

“Oh fuck, baby, fuck!” he yelled, throwing a few final, violent, thrusts into you before pulling out. He continued to moan harshly as he pumped himself in his hand, letting his cum spurt out all over your ass, covering it almost completely. He stroked it until there wasn’t a single drop left inside of him.

'Baby?' you thought, contemplating if you'd misheard him.

Once he was sure he was finished, he breathed in and out deeply, trying to catch his breath while grabbing for a few tissues on his desk. He used them to lightly clean you up while you too were still bent over, struggling to get your breath back.

As soon as you heard his pants come up and zip, you were sure he was done. You slowly used your hands to push yourself up and off the table. Your muscles twitched as you went, absolutely exhausted. You didn’t know if you’d even be able to stand on your own, let alone make it back to the dorm.

You were slow as you turned, flattening your skirt down and trying to get your footing, but failing.

“Woah, woah, take it easy,” Dr. Kim smiled happily, knowing he was the one that had done this to you. He reached his hands out for you to hold so that you could get your balance.

“Yeah, thanks,” you said, blushing while nodding downward to acknowledge his help.

You both stood for a moment, absorbing the scenery and what had actually just happened. You almost couldn’t believe it.

As if it finally registered, you were suddenly uncertain of what to do next. You ran a hand through your hair before crossing your arms over your chest. You wanted to act like you weren’t nervous, but you knew that you were failing miserably.

“Well, I should probably head out then,” you tried to play off as light-hearted, moving your body out of his way and toward the door. You couldn’t believe you were about to have to do the walk of shame… at fucking school.

“You don’t have to-” Dr. Kim started, almost too eagerly, “you don’t have to go…” he calmed himself. “If you don’t want to. If you need time to, umm.” You’d never seen him be at a loss for words like this. “Get collected and everything.”

His eyes were softer than you’d remembered. For once, he didn’t look intimidating. He looked almost… sweet?

But none of that changed the fact that you had just fucked your professor and needed to go clear your head.

“Oh,” you smiled, trying to look grateful. “I appreciate it, but I think I’m alright. I should probably go finish up on an assignment I’ve been working on for your class actually. But really, thank you,” you said, bowing your head in gratitude, about to reach for the door handle.

“Wait,” he insisted, moving closer to you. “I just wanted to say that I really did mean all the things I said about you. Regardless of whatever this was, you are so fucking brilliant. I don’t want you to think that this is why I wanted you for the position. I hope that you’ll stay on… and that we can actually work together.” You thought you could make out a plea in his tone.

“Of course I’ll stay on, Dr. Kim. I’m excited to work with you,” you smiled, realizing now that you had some kind of upper hand.

He smiled back as he took a few steps backward, letting you turn to reach for the door once more.

“Please, call me Seungmin… Except in class of course,” he winked with a chuckle as he moseyed back behind his desk.

“Alright then, Seungmin,” you annunciated teasingly, smiling at him with big, innocent eyes. “I need to get to work on that assignment, but I’ll email you later so we can find a meeting time that works for us both?"

Seungmin just rolled his eyes with an annoyed grin. “You’re getting an A, regardless of that fucking assignment. And please... just give me your number instead.”

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loveazumane · 1 year

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—virgin.

summary: virgin ushijima and not-so-innocent reader

warning(s): nsfw! virgin!ushijima. pervert!ushijima. masturbation (male). slight age gap.

ushijima, 20 late something professional volleyball player, meeting his manager’s early 20s daughter who’s sinfully naughty—she a vixen in disguise, wearing cute sundresses and cute makeup and cute accessories and speaking in that cute voice to ushijima as she touches his chest, squeezes his arm, and presses her breast against him as she pretends to reach for something next to him.

but ushijima is not just a 20 late something professional volleyball player. he’s also the unbelievably attractive old virgin who doesn’t know how to speak to girls, let alone handle them. ushijima is a virgin loser who blushes at y/n’s touches, from her hugs, her light caresses, and to her soft voice when she speaks to him.

“ushijima?” she would say. “would you like me to get you some water?”

she’s always fetching him water. sometimes a towel. and ushijima only nods, cheeks blushed with the prettiest shade of pink when she smiles in delight and spins on her heels and runs to fetch a bottle of water—one she doesn’t even need to fetch because he’s already got his own. but seeing her turn around, the short cherry sundress spinning in the air and showing a hint of white red underwear. red. not a color for a girl who was innocent and pure. but ushijima didn’t know that. but y/n? oh, she knew.

“ushijima?” y/n jogs over with the bottle and she trips.

like every cliché, her knight and shining armor—in this case it’s ushijima—catches her with ease before helping her stand straight. he stares down at her and becomes aware that she’s pressed against him, chest squeezed in the nicest way to make her breast sit pretty. ushijima feels his cheeks heat up, and goodness he feels something in him, something like when his stomach does flips. he lets go of her immediately and asks if she’s okay. y/n only squeezes her eyes shut as she apologizes and looks away in shame.

“i spilled the water. i’m so sorry!” she exclaims.

and that’s when ushijima notices how much damper his shirt has gotten. it trickles all the way down to his abdomen. then… he notices it clearly on y/n. her dress is white with little cherries and the water that spilled on him was more prominent on hers. it makes her dress transparent, showing the bright red bra y/n had on. he gulps, not sure what to say, but he certainly knows how he’s feeling.

“you… i…” ushijima’s heart quickens. “y/n.”

“hm?” she peers up at him with innocent eyes. “yes, ushijima?”

goodness, the way you said his name… it can’t be innocent—there’s no way it could be. you’re just being nice and soft. there was no underlying tone. but ushijima is too dense to realize that you weren’t doing anything with good intensions.

and that wasn’t just the beginning. so many more “accidents,” so many more of ushijima trying to calm his pacing heart and his burning cheeks. every night, his only release was to touch himself. it helped get rid of the thoughts of her. the thoughts of you. your breath, your touch, your smile, your body, your voice, your pretty face—your entire existence. you, you, you, you. every action and word, it all plays in his head like a mantra until his cumming all over his hand at the thought of you, your name tumbling from his lips as he bucks and grinds and empties every last drop of his seed.

those bad intensions of yours don’t even stop there. it’s driving him crazy. he doesn’t know what to do. he’s like a dog in heat. every night—every damn night is hard for him. he can’t sleep without stroking his cock with you on his mind. he can’t get your pretty voice out of his head unless he’s cumming to it. and it becomes worse because he’s on a trip abroad with the team, taking a break and having some bonding time with the staff as well and you’re there. you’re always across the room from his. it’s a coincidence, but it seems like even the universe wanted to work in your favor. but for ushijima’s, it was completely working against his.

fuck, every night now he strokes his cock, once or maybe twice, thinking of the fact that you’re just one knock away. so close, but yet out of reach. he can’t even hold his groans as he squeezes his eyes shut and releases over his palm when he hears your cheerful laughter from beyond the walls. y/n, y/n, y/n, his head would chant, and it falls off his lips eventually too until he hears that click! and you stand there, the door’s open wide, the light’s shining right in to reveal the bed—to reveal ushijima cumming all over his palm with your name falling from his lips in the most lewd and disgusting way. his thighs, large and tense, open wide to reveal his thick balls and his equally thick and long girth that’s wrapped with his large hand. everything is out in the open and it’s a sight.

“y/n,” it comes out strangled and breathy. and the tone, though filled with post clarity and pleasure, is guilty and scared.

he stares at you, caught in the act. his eyes are filled with shame, but he can’t move. but then you smile and it confuses him. it’s not the smile he recognizes. it’s not soft and sweet and it’s almost like a smirk. you didn’t look mad or disgusted—and that’s because you weren’t. and that’s when ushijima realizes as you shut the door behind you and you click the lock into place. and everything becomes clear to him—every smile, every chat, every question, every touch and caress you have ever given to ushijima… he understands now.

his mind begins to clear more and more. every event unfolds as the night progresses from the help of you. from the first 10 minutes where you situate yourself between ushijima’s long legs and thick thighs, sucking his cock and lightly squeezing his balls with your palm to the next 20 minutes where you’re grinding your pussy along his hard length to soak him with your juices all the while kissing and sucking and nibbling on his pretty skin.

“y/n.” this time, it’s pleading. his tone is weak and hoarse, and ushijima is begging to a girl much younger than him. to a girl who was definitely not as innocent as he thought she was. “fuck, fuck, please put it in. i might cum too early.”

but you don’t listen. god, he should’ve known—should’ve known that you weren’t the type to listen. not with the way you had taken his cock to the back of your throat and not the way you carelessly littered his neck and collarbones with hickeys.

he can feel how slick your pussy was as you continue to grind down on his cock, your folds parting so nicely as you rub up and down his tip. and sometimes he thinks it might slip in when it sinks slightly into your hole, or when you jolt when it rubs down on your clit a little too hard, but it doesn’t. and it drives him insane. he’s panting and groaning and he’s whimpering. and then he cums, his seeds spilling over his stomach and his hands shoot up to your hips to stop you from moving because it’s so sensitive and he hasn’t came more than twice before in such a short time.

“let go, ushijima,” you say.

ushijima freezes. his eyes lock into yours and he sees how different you look compared to before. your eyes are darker. now, he feels stupid for not noticing how bad you actually are. how naughty and lewd you were. a real fucking devil in disguise.

and like he was under a spell, he lets go and squeezes the sheets below him hard when you lift off his cock after brushing up against his tip. you lean down and dart out your tongue to lick his cum clean before doing the same to his cock. ushijima squeezes his eyes shut at the painful yet pleasurable sensation of your tongue swirling around his tip until he opens them when you’re done.

“why don’t you let me cum too, ushijima?” you whisper, crawling up to meet him at face-level, lips hovering over his. “would you let me cum on your face? i’ll let you put it in if you do.”

and ushijima snaps out his his daze and brings his hands up to your ass. with so much ease, he lifts you up until your dripping pussy is hovering over his face. it makes you remember that ushijima wasn’t just a regular virgin loser. he had muscle and weight on him and he was tall in comparison to you. much larger even. and ushijima wanted to remind you of that. he wasn’t just something you could toy with. not for too long anyway. and he was gonna prove that.

he lowers you down and flattens his tongue over your pussy and drags it from your hole to your clit. and it not only feels good, but it sounds good too because it’s so fucking loud that it vibrates against the walls along with the embarrassingly slutty moan that falls from your lips. and now you knew that you weren’t the only one being underestimated because you had just realized you were gonna be in for a very long night.

#ushijima smut #ushijima wakatoshi smut #haikyuu smut #hq smut #ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x reader

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writinground2 · 8 months

Text

Bad Guy - Leah Williamson

Based on a request for more Angsty Leah

This ended up a lot different and longer than I expected it to. There is the potential for a part two if there is interest.

“Never have I ever, cheated on someone,” Ella spoke.

The lionesses playing the drinking game with water at their team bonding night, everyone spread out in the small hotel room. The night had moved from card games and movies to the game of Never Have I Ever to get to know each other a little more.

A few took bashful sips, admitting their previous infidelity, all looking guilty about their actions. Leah scoffed when she noticed Y/N does not take a sip.

“Seems fitting this is a question you choose to lie about,” the blonde rolls her eyes.

“I’m not lying,” Y/N mutters, keeping her head down, hoping someone else will continue the game and the attention would be taken off her.

Leah opens her mouth to bite back, “whatever,” she sneers instead when Millie sharply elbows her in the side.

The room sits in awkward silence for a moment, no one knowing what to say. Most wanted to ask more questions about the interaction, having never seen the either woman be anything but professional towards each other since their friendship had fallen apart only a few months ago.

“Umm, never have I ever, broken a bone,” Jordan spoke up to end the tense silence. She knew it would draw the attention off Y/N, so many of the players wanting to compete with who had the coolest or worst injury story.

Y/N played a few more rounds before quietly slipping out of the room. No one noticing until they hear the click of the door.

“Time for bed!” Millie was quick to usher everyone out of her before anyone could question Leah about her tense interaction with Y/N.

No one knew the cause of the fallout between the two friends. They had been friends since staring on the youth teams years ago, thick as thieves early on. Then, suddenly, Y/N was being sent on loan to Arsenal from Aston Villa and Leah wanted nothing to do with her best friend. Jordan and Rachel avoided Y/N their first international break after the loan, but seemed fine the next camp, both giving the older girl sympathetic looks. Leah would remain professional with her former best friend, but it was apparent something significant occurred within Y/N’s loan.

“Sorry,” Y/N mumbled as she almost walked into Leah as she walked out of the bathroom as Leah entered their shared room. Because of course they would be roomed together. Staff didn’t realize the tension in the friendship, leaving them paired as they normally were.

“I bet you are,” her tone saturated with in sarcasm, “nothing but lies coming out of your mouth.”

“I never cheated Leah,” Y/N whispered, standing at the end of her bed, face crumpling while she tried to convey her honesty to the blonde.

“Cut the shit, Y/N. I was there that night; we all saw you with that girl at the bar. We saw you fighting with Sydney before you left,” Leah squared her shoulders to confront Y/N, she wasn’t going to let Y/N deny her infidelity anymore.

“I know,” Y/N couldn’t meet the blondes eye, fiddling with the hem of her shirt, “but, it wasn’t what it looked like.”

“It wasn’t what it looked like,” Leah mocked her.

“I know it’s cliché, but It really wasn’t what it looked like.”

“Yeah? So what was it supposed to look like? Because, what it looked like, was you fighting with your girlfriend, then getting into a car of girls, and me being left with your crying girlfriend.”

“I didn’t get in the car,” Y/N whispered, but Leah wasn’t listening.

“That you kicked her out of your house only to show up at Arsenal. Single at that too!”

She glared Y/N down, eyes set, and jaw clenched, waiting for Y/N to answer. Sydney had been Y/N’s girlfriend of two years, the couple living together for one. She had grown close with the blonde, the pair loving to team up to make fun of Y/N. Sydney was the liaison for the marketing company for Aston Villa.

“I didn’t cheat, I didn’t get in the car that night,” Y/N repeated.

She knew how that night appeared to anyone watching on. That it easily appeared like Y/N and her girlfriend gotten into a fight, leaving her at the bar to get into a car full of girls. That she left her girlfriend in another city and moved to another team to avoid dealing with the consequences of her actions.

Leah continued to stare Y/N down, “if you want me to believe that, then what was it supposed to look like?”

Y/N let out a long sigh, scraping both hands down her face. She wanted to defend herself, to tell Leah the truth, but telling the truth also meant baring Sydney’s actions and she wasn’t sure she wanted to do that.

“I found out after the game that Villa wasn’t going to extend my contract. But they wanted to do whatever they could to squeeze as much money out of me before I left. They told a few teams interested that I was getting re-signed, even though I wasn’t, so that teams would bid for the loan rights. They hoped teams would sign the loan, then get a big transfer fee next season.”

Leah softened slightly, she couldn’t imagine being regarded only as a price tag, “this doesn’t have anything to with you supposedly not cheating.”

“I told Sydney before we went out. She didn’t really understand, hell I didn’t understand it, but she was mad because she thought it meant I was asking to be loaned out. When we went to the bar to get another round, she told me she was going to move out and went back to the table before I could say anything.”

Y/N sat on the edge of her bed with a defeated sigh, she might as well tell the whole story. She didn’t want to potentially ruin Leah’s friendship with Sydney, but she also couldn’t risk this to continue to put strain on their professional relationship.

“I thought that meant she didn’t want me around, so I decided to go home, let you guys enjoy the night. On the way out, there was a group of girls trying to get their friend in the backseat of the car to leave, but she was too drunk to stand, so I helped them. She got in the car, they left, and I went home.”

“But your car was still at the pub.”

“I walked; Sydney had the keys.”

Leah crossed her arms while she analyzed what Y/N told her. It was possible Y/N helped the group of girls, she always helped people around her. Y/N had hurt her wrist during the game and probably wouldn’t have been able to handle the gear shift to drive.

Taking the older girl in, Leah could see how tired she genuinely looked. How it looked like a struggle to just keep herself sitting upright and bags under her eyes when she would briefly make eye contact.

“She didn’t come home until the next afternoon.”

“She stayed with Jordan,” Leah snapped, she wasn’t going to let Y/N imply Sydney cheated to make herself sound better.

“I know,” Y/N nodded, “Jordan called me that night to yell at me when Sydney showed up there upset.”

Leah smiled a bit, she knew how protective Jordan could be and could imagine the earful she would have given Y/N, “good, you deserved it.”

“Damnit Leah, I didn’t cheat, and I didn’t kick her out!”

Y/N stood abruptly from the bed, frowning. Leah dropped her arms, mouth opening in shock at the sudden shift in Y/N.

“She broke up with me! She cheated! She told she found someone better, more attractive, that she never really found me attractive. I lived in a hotel for two weeks before Villa sent me to Arsenal like I was nothing!”

Y/N begun pacing the room.

“I had to miss training so I could pack my bags while she was at work. She got the house and everything in it and all I have is a couple bags and a few boxes.”

Leah didn’t know any of that. Sydney had told her Y/N kicked her out of the house and she believed it. And she certainly never said anything about seeing someone else. It was starting to be clear that Leah truly didn’t know the full story, or at least, not the true story.

“Why didn’t you say anything before?”

Y/N deflated at the question, sinking back down on the edge of the bed, “she was your friend too, I didn’t want to ruin that.”

Any anger the defender felt was gone now. Y/N had spent months protecting Sydney even though she didn’t deserve it. She had been taking the brunt of Leah’s anger without saying anything for months.

“I’m so sorry Y/N, I – “

“It’s alright. It was easier to be the bad guy in her story than fight it.”

Leah made her way across the room, sitting next to Y/N, her whole body pressing into Y/N’s side.

“It’s not alright, you took so much of my anger when you didn’t deserve any of it. You took Jordan and Rachels too.”

Leah sounded astonished when she spoke, realizing how terrible Y/N had been treated. That she tolerated everyone’s accusations and criticisms while dealing with the truth of the breakup and club loan alone. Y/N should have been angry at everyone and should have told them all the truth about her breakup.

“They figured it out when they took her for drinks,” Y/N shrugged and Leah could tell she was trying to detach herself while telling the story, “She showed up with her new girlfriend. I wasn’t even at Arsenal yet.”

Leah shook her head. She was so angry at herself now. How could she believe someone she knew two years over her best friend she had known for fifteen? She had been so blinded by her anger, she let herself be manipulated into believing her best friend would have done anything like that.

“I’m gonna go to bed,” Y/N pushed herself up.

Leah launched herself from the bed and into Y/N’s side, pinning her arms in place in a tight bear hug, “I am so, so sorry Y/N.”

“it’s alright, really.”

“It’s not!” Leah pulled away but kept her grip on Y/N’s and forced her to face her, “you went through all of that alone and you let yourself be the bad guy when you shouldn’t have.”

Y/N tried to pull away only for Leah to tighten her grip, one hand clasping the back of her neck so they are forced to meet eyes, “I cannot apologize enough for how I have been to you, but I want to make it up to you.”

“You don’t need to make it up to me. I just want us to go back to being friends.”

The blonde eagerly nodded at that, letting Y/N pull away this time to settle into bed.

Leah rushed to complete her bedtime routine before sliding into her own bed. She settles on her side to look over at Y/N facing away from her, chest rising and falling steadily, fast asleep.

Incessant buzzing wakes Leah far too early the next morning. Y/N mutters soft swears while frantically trying to silence the device and hide the bright screen to avoid waking her roommate.

The buzzing stops as Y/N throws a hoodie on and is leaving the room as the buzzing starts again. Leah can hear Y/N speaking in the hallway now, she tries to stay awake to make sure everything is alright but sleep quickly wins. Y/N isn’t in the room when she wakes again a few hours later. She gets ready for team breakfast and sits on her bed, waiting for Y/N to return, before rushing out the room when she realizes she’ll be late otherwise.

Y/N is already seated at a table away from everyone when she gets downstairs. She has her knees tucked up on the edge of her chair with her chin resting on them and a coffee cup clasped in both hands against her chest. Even across the room, Leah can see how exhausted she looks.

After making a plate, she begins to make her way towards Y/N but is stopped by a hand tugging her to a stop. Jordan shaking her head ‘no’, telling her to leave Y/N alone for the time being. Leah looks back over, debating if she should listen or not. Sighing, she settles next to the midfielder. They’re friendship just starting to be repaired.

“She told you the truth about Sydney,” it isn’t a question.

Leah nods slowly, unsure why it matters.

“Did you say anything to Sydney when you found out?”

Nodding again slowly, “I texted her when Y/N went to sleep and said I was upset she hadn’t told me the truth.”

Jordan clenched her jaw and nodded too, “Sydney is pissed.”

Leah quickly pulled her phone out to see If she had missed a message, furrowing her brow when she hadn’t.

“Not at you. She’ll take it out on Y/N.”

Her eyes quickly shot over to Y/N. Y/N’s phone was face down on the table, but she was staring intensely at it.

“That was the phone call,” she realized.

The midfielder nodded, already seeming to know what the morning had been like for Y/N.

“Even though they broke up months ago, she still texts Y/N almost every day. She’s,” Jordan pauses while she considers her words, “cruel with everything she has to say.”

“What do you mean?”

Jordan glances around the table, when she sees no one is paying attention to them she continues, “at first, she was mad Y/N wouldn’t stay her friend. Then it was that she turned Rachel and me against her. But it’s mostly attacking anything about her; her looks, her career, mocks her for being single or being upset with what happened. She’s truly ruthless.”

Leah is disgusted when she hears what someone she considered a friend was doing to Y/N. Guilt settling deep in her gut at how wrong she had been about the whole situation. Jordan can see the thoughts she once had pass across Leah’s face while she watches Y/N toss her phone back down.

“Rach and I thought the same too. She was convincing when she told us what Y/N supposedly did, I think she believes it herself that she didn’t do anything wrong. She was confused when we didn’t understand how she had the house and a new girlfriend while Y/N was stuck in a hotel in a new city.”

“How long did she have to stay in a hotel once she got to London?”

“She’s still in a hotel,” Jordan shakes her head. She knew Y/N had been so battered down, that she didn’t think Arsenal would keep her around long enough to make a flat wroth it.

Fortunately, there isn’t much time during the day for players to be on their phones. But during the breaks they do have, Y/N slinks away from the group to skim her few new messages. Each time she returns to the group, Leah can see her force a smile on her face, convincing everyone around she is fine. She does manage to put on a good show of being alright, but Leah can see right through the fraudulent smile and forced laughs.

Y/N’s phone vibrates on the night stand that night while she goes through her nightly routine in the bathroom. Leah ignores the first message, only for several more to follow, glancing at the screen she sees Sydney’s name.

“Sorry, I meant to silence it,” Y/N apologizes, and she takes it off the nightstand.

“Nothing to be sorry about,” the defender dismisses her, “Jordan said she’s pretty mean. I didn’t know she still messaged you, if I had, I wouldn’t have texted her last night.”

Y/N glances at the blonde, nodding slowly, before shrugging her shoulders while she skimmed the new messages and typing out a short reply before tossing the phone onto the bed next to her.

“Jordan only read them because she thought I was seeing someone,” Y/N gave what almost looked like a genuine smile, “my phone kept going off while we were out once. She stole it, thinking she would get some juicy messages. Once she saw what the messages were, she went through most of them.”

“I know I have no place to ask this, but can I see them?”

Leah could see her tense and bite her lip, clearly considering the question.

“Why didn’t you ask me about what happened that night? Or trust that I would never do something like that?”

The blonde nodded, they were valid questions, questions she had been considering since the night before.

“She was damn convincing. You weren’t you that whole night, then she came back to the table crying and you were outside with some girl draped all over you. It was all so believable, she made it believable.”

Y/N risked a small glance towards the other bed. Leah had propped herself up on an elbow, staring intently at Y/N. She couldn’t quite read the expression on her face, a mixture of pity and guilt maybe.

“I never thought you could do something like that. And she was so convincing. I was just blinded by my anger that I let myself be fooled. I am so sorry that I let myself be tricked and ruined our friendship when I should have just asked you.”

The pity was gone, guilt settled across her face.

Y/N wordlessly handed her phone across the space between the beds. Leah pushed herself to take the phone, settling on her back to read the messages.

Leah read the most recent messages first, slowly working her way backwards. Reading the vile things Sydney had been sending Y/N throughout the day, Y/N offering short messages to amend her ex’s anger.

Y/N fixed her gaze to the ceiling, unwilling to see the blondes reaction as she read the messages, unwilling to see her agree with Sydney.

The phone dropped after a minute of her reading the messages, Leah unable to finish see anymore, disgusted with the things sent. The messages all varied in length, but they all attacked Y/N in every capacity that she could. She criticized anything she could to get a reaction from Y/N.

Leah pushed herself to hang her legs off the side of the bed. She didn’t know what to do with herself, didn’t know what emotion was the strongest right now. Part of her wanted to storm out of the hotel and confront Sydney. Part of her wanted to wrap Y/N in the tightest hug possible and mend all the broken pieces. All she could bring herself to do was sit with her head in her hands.

“I, Y/N, fuck,” she could only stutter out, “I don’t even know what to say. Those are, she’s, those are all so fucked.”

Y/N shrugged, “is what it is.”

“it’s not! What she’s saying is so wrong and fucked up!”

Anger overtaking as she stood up, harshly running her hand through her hair, “you need to block her!”

“I can’t,” Y/N whispered.

Leah just looked at her, mouth opening and closing.

“I blocked her on socials and she lost it. When I tried to block her number, she took it out on Rach and Jords, messaging them and all that. She left them alone when I unblocked her.”

She shook her head, Y/N continued to protect everyone but herself.

“They can handle themselves; you don’t need to protect them.”

Y/N stubbornly shook her head, refusing to accept that, “they don’t need to be part of this.”

Leah couldn’t believe Y/N was willing to continue to handle this all on her own. She sat herself on the edge of Y/N’s bed, gently placing a hand on her thigh, encouraging her make eye contact with her.

“I don’t have it in me to fight anymore, I never really did,” Y/N dropped her chin to her chest, shoulder rounded in, “I didn’t fight the breakup, I gave her the house, I didn’t fight anything she told people. I just want to be done with it.”

Her voice trembled, tipping her head back, hoping to keep the tears from falling.

“Looking back, I think she broke me down years ago.”

Leah’s heart ached as Y/N spoke, “I am so sorry Y/N.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“No, but I should have been there for you, I will be here for you.”

Leah eventually made her way back to her own bed, but sleep wouldn’t come, lying on her side watching Y/N tucked into herself. She couldn’t imagine how Y/N had handled the last months completely alone, while also having people viewing her as the bad guy in the story. Guilt rocked her, she was one of those people.

Y/N’s phone remained quiet the next day and Leah could see the relief it left Y/N with.

“You know, you and I are friends again,” Jordan spoke up when they were alone at their dinner table that night.

Leah furrowed her brow and slowly nodded, agreeing with the statement.

“It would be alright if anything started with the two of you,” Jordan gave her a small smile, “Gee told me how disappointed you were when Y/N started seeing Sydney a couple years ago.”

Leah blushed, anxiously running her thumb along her bottom lip, risking a glance to Y/N the table over. Jordan wasn’t wrong. She had been disappointed at the start of Y/N’s relationship. Her feeling had developed when Y/N had been such a good, supportive friend for both her and Jordan when they broke up, even before they broke up, supporting them when it became rocky.

It hadn’t been something she had expected to happen. She didn’t even know what it was that she was feeling, only realizing her attraction when Y/N excitedly told them about her new relationship at an international camp. The distress at the announcement, she immediately understood she was attracted.

“You would be really good for her. She needs someone to be good to her, and I think that’s you.”

“I didn’t even realize what I felt until I heard she was dating someone,” Leah felt a little defensive as she spoke.

Jordan was quick to place a reassuring hand on Leah’s arm, “it’s alright. I know it’s all new for you. And I’m not saying you should do anything about it. Just pointing out that you would be good for.”

Leah bashfully looked away, she would be lying if she said she hadn’t considered it at one point, she’d also be lying if she denied it being more than once.

“Last time I could get her to say anything about dating again, she said she swore it off because she doesn’t think she’s worth it anymore.”

The weight in her gut gets heavier the more she’s told about Y/N the last few months

“But I think she’s just waiting for someone to prove her wrong about it all.”

Leah is amazed at how easily Y/N can move past the months she had been treated so horribly. They easily return to being friends. The guilt is still weighing on her, but it eases slightly when she sees Y/N genuinely smile at her. Her attraction surging back to the front of her mind.

“Fuck!”

Leah rushes out of the bathroom when she hears Y/N’s phone hitting the wall. Y/N’s pacing aggressively, harshly running her fingers through her hair.

“What’s happened?” she picks up the phone, inspecting it to ensure it isn’t broken, placing it on the dresser.

“Arsenal cancelled my hotel room. I’m homeless when I get back to London.”

Leah jolts when Y/N kicks the bed.

“Good thing I don’t have any stuff to worry about,” she lets out a humourless laugh, kicking the bed a few more times.

After one last kick, Y/N crumples to the floor, wrapping her arms around her knees and tucking her head between them as sobs wracked her body. Leah rushes to her side, pulling her tight to her chest. Y/N doesn’t fight the action but keeps herself curled into herself.

“You weren’t supposed to find out that way.”

Y/N scrambles away.

“Shit, that sounds bad,” the blonde stays on the floor, “Arsenal cancelled your room because you’re going to move in with me. I was going to tell you once we got in bed, I just called them after dinner, I didn’t think they would tell you so fast.”

Y/N whirls around and stares down at the defender. Leah slowly pushes herself off the floor.

“You need a home Y/N, I want to give that to you,”

When Y/N doesn’t say anything, Leah frantically thinks of anything to say to fix it. Y/N crashes her body into Leah and the blonde can feel the tears soaking her shirt. She’s sure she’ll have bruises on her side where Y/N is gripping into her. Managing to pull a handout to rub up and down Y/N’s back as her sobs continue.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” Y/N pulls away, using the sleeve of her hoodie to try and wipe the snot smeared on the blonde’s neck.

Leah shakes her head, batting the hand away to pull her back into her, “you don’t need to be sorry or say anything. Just come live with me. I have a spare room; I want you to come stay in It.” Once Y/N nods, Leah guides her to lay in her bed, tucking her in.

The first week living together is awkward. If it wasn’t for the meals left for Leah and the fact that they carpool to training, she would think Y/N wasn’t staying there. Y/N is the perfect house guest, Leah’s house cleaner than when she moved in. But other than seeing her in passing, Leah hardly saw her new roommate.

Leah grabs Y/N’s arm immediately when they walk through the door, preventing her from running away.

“This your home now, too. You don’t need to hide in your room. Unpack, eat meals with me, shower here,” she emphasized, knowing Y/N hadn’t even showered at the flat yet, only showering at the training facility.

Y/N shrunk under Leah’s stare. She had been doing her best to remain as out of site at possible, whatever she could to avoid upsetting the blonde, “I wanted to stay out of your way.”

“And I want you in my way.”

Y/N shook her head, not understanding what she meant.

“I want you to live your life and feel comfortable.”

The next few weeks, Y/N does make an effort to leave her room more, making Leah smile. Y/N waits to eat her meals with Leah now, leaves a pair of shoes by the door, shower products along the tub edge.

“I blocked her,” she whispers between bites at breakfast, “Rach and Jordan did too.”

Leah lets her fork clatter to table as Y/N spoke.

“I am so, so proud of you Y/N,” she grips Y/N’s wrist across the table, her smile wide as her eyes crinkle.

Y/N just shrugs and continues to eat, but Leah keeps her hand where it is with her thumb rubbing across her wrist, picking up her fork to eat with her other hand.

This was a sign Y/N was healing, moving past the torment her ex had been putting her through for months. Y/N was moving in the right direction. Maybe Jordan was right, maybe she was the person Y/N needed to fix all her broken pieces.

“Have you thought of dating again?” Leah risked. She knew pursuing Y/N would require a lot of patience and understanding.

“A little bit, but not in the way you think,” Y/N harshly bit her lip, Leah wishing she could tug it away to safety, “I’m too broken to date, I think. No one wants to be with someone this ruined.”

Leah couldn’t imagine the pain Y/N must constantly be in to think so poorly of herself, to think that she was too damaged and undeserving of someone to be loved.

“You are not a reflection of people who couldn’t love you properly,” Leah’s grip tightens until Y/N makes eye contact with her, “I am sorry Sydney loved you so poorly and made you think you took up space you didn’t deserve and abandoned you and hurt you so badly you think love is an awful thing.”

Worried Y/N will start bleeding if she bites any harder on her lip, Leah does use her thumb to tug it out. She can feel it tremble under the pad of her thumb as she slowly drags it across the flesh.

Y/N runs her tongue over her lip when Leah’s thumb is gone, Leah’s steely eyes tracking the motion. She wanted to run away, worried she might do something and risk moving too fast. Leaving now though would ruin all the work she had done to regain Y/N’s trust.

Leah continues to show Y/N what love is. Opening her car door when they leave for training. Always letting her choose the show they watch. She attempts breakfast, bacon and eggs, but they ultimately end with cereal when she burns both. She increases physical contact; sitting close enough they touch on the couch, hand grazing her back as she walks past, tucking hair behind her ears.

Y/N adores all of it. But it makes her panic. She won’t go through all of this again. Won’t have someone show her love and care, only to rip it all away from her.

So, she runs away. Retreats back into her room. Goes back to leaving meals for the blonde to eat, leaving before the blonde wakes up, meeting her at training.

Leah stands outside Y/N’s room after training, so she knows Y/N’s in there. But this room has been her one safe space since moving in, the blonde doesn’t want to take that away from Y/N, doesn’t want her to feel trapped.

Steeling herself, she knocks on the door, three quick raps.

Y/N doesn’t look surprised when she opens the door. Just opens the door and shuffles back. Leah can see her bags packed on the floor next to the bed and the bed neatly made.

Choosing to ignore the bags for now, Leah settles on the edge of the bed, “I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I really like you and I was hoping I could ease you into idea of being in a relationship again. Unpack your things, I’ll back off.”

“I liked it,” Y/N whispers, sitting next to Leah, “but, I’m not the guy that gets the girl, no happy ending.”

“You already got the girl though,” Leah’s voice is soft as she speaks, “we can have the happy ending.”

“We can have the happy ending?’

“Not for a long time though, because we have to have a happy everything else first.”

Y/N tugs ones of Leah’s hands in her lap and rests head on her shoulder. Leah drops a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

#woso imagine #woso x reader #leah williamson x reader #leah williamson imagine

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thewritetofreespeech · 2 months

Note

For the NSFW post in regards to Gale Dekarios:

B, C, F & Y? ^^

Hope you're a having a lovely week.

NSFW Alphabet

B = BODY PART (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

As cliché and PG as it sounds, he loves a person’s eyes. The eyes are the windows to the soul. They can tell a person so much about what they are feeling, what they want, what they want to say without even saying it. Gale loves to look into his partners eyes when they make love to see all of it. He also likes when they look up at him when they do….other things…. C = CUM (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Would never dream of cumming on his partner (on purpose). Even if asked. Accidents do happen, but when they do Gale is quick to be embarrassed and apologizes. Once he got so frazzled he summoned Created Water on accident to hose his partner off.

F = FAVOURITE POSITION (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Coupled with his love for his partner’s eyes, his favorite position is missionary or really any of them that are face to face. The lotus is also a personal favorite because it almost feels spiritual.

Y = YEARNING (How high is their sex drive?)

His drive is fairly high. His ability to act on said drive (aka initiate intimacy or sex) is very low. It is an issue.

#;ask and ye shall receive (request answers)#gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #bg3 gale #gale x tav #gale x reader #gale dekarios x reader #gale of waterdeep x reader #baldur's gate #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate #baldur's gate headcanons #bg3 headcanons #headcanons #bg3 smut #baldur's gate smut

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appocalipse · 2 years

Text

this has me squealing tbh

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles, sitting down next to you.

You don’t move. He shifts closer, thigh brushing yours, and says it again, louder this time, “I'm sorry.”

You take a deep breath. Sitting on your front porch, watching a particularly dramatic-looking summer rain, you and Steve are the perfect cliché of a rom-com after a fight — except you're not quite sure how this is going to end.

He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear and leans closer, nuzzling your bare neck, touch soft.

Though it tickles, you still don’t move. He groans.

“Baby,” Steve tries again.

“Don’t call me that.”

He shakes his head in disbelief, a humorless smile on his face. “Oh, c’mon, I didn’t-”

“C’mon?” you finally turn your face sideways to look at him; he’s surprised at how mad you look. “Unbelievable. You are unbelievable, Steve Harrington.”

Being forgetful is his only sin, he swears. And even though you’re having a hard time believing him, it is the truth; he didn’t tell Nancy you two were officially dating before because the topic simply didn’t come up. He rarely saw her these days. And on the rare occasions he did, it was simply a quick exchange of words, no space for deeper and more meaningful conversations — or else, he would have obviously talked about you. He had a harder time stopping talking about you.

And, of course, when she spotted you two walking together hand in hand and nothing less of shock took over her features, you immediately thought the worst.

Honestly, Steve couldn’t blame you — you’d been together officially for only a month now, and the way he handled relationships in his past wasn’t encouraging in the least.

Plus, his hand slipped from yours when Nancy approached to say hi.

He didn’t mean to. He truly, honestly, didn’t mean to — his stupid hand just did it on its own. He got nervous and panicked, and when Steve tried to reach out for your hand again — to mend his mistake — you moved your hand away.

“Y/N, I know what you’re thinking, and that’s not what happened,” he says, resting a gentle hand on your knee. “I swear it’s not.”

You grab his wrist and move his hand away. “I think you should go.”

“No.”

“What?”

“No, I’m not going,” he states, crossing his arms dramatically. “Not as long as you’re mad at me.”

“Steve-”

“Do you trust me?”

You sigh. He's looking at you with those big brown eyes. “You didn’t tell her we’re dating! She’s your ex, you- you loved her. You told me that, that she was the first girl you’ve ever loved and that it took you a long time to get over her…and now you didn’t tell her about us. What am I supposed to think?”

“That I wasn’t thinking about her. That the only girl in my mind is you.”

Eyes never leaving yours, Steve leans down and brushes his lips against your shoulder.

You swallow. “I wish I could believe that.”

“Then believe it,” he's softly kissing all the way to your neck, slowly. “Because it's true.”

You laugh. No humor, just…irony. “First love is special.”

“Not as special as the last.”

He moves forward and kisses you before you can say something else — you’re too stunned to do anything but gasp, pulling back after a moment too long for someone who’s supposed to be mad.

It’s so hard to stay mad at him.

“It doesn’t matter if you’re not my first love, first date, or first kiss,” he murmurs against your mouth, forehead resting against yours. “I want you to be my last everything.”

more drabbles | request here!

#steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington oneshot #steve x reader #steve harrington #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fluff #stranger things #steve harrington angst #steve harrington drabble #steve harrington blurb

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cursingtoji · 10 months

Note

SANDY!!! The way i ran here after seeing your event 🥹 Jiraiya with 46 plsplspls 💕 congrats on 3k sweets <3<3

❛ 𝑤ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑓 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑠𝑒𝑒𝑠 𝑢𝑠? ❜ ┊ cause he can’t stay away from his pretty girl, not even when she’s in a public hot spring

plus when you have been apart for too long ┊fem!reader x husband!Jiraiya, public sex, pussy eating cause he does that it’s canon, anal stim, creampie ┊ The Clichés ™

You ask your husband as he starts to kissing you in a way you know where it’s going to end.

Prior to that, you were just returning for an assignment, before leaving the village you were at you sent a letter to him, saying you would stop by this onsen on your way and arrive fully rested in the morning.

Jiraiya, being the impatient man he is, couldn’t wait to see you, specially after being apart for too long.

The idea was to surprise you in your room (laying naked on your bed with a rose in his mouth), but once he saw how empty the place was and peeking at the women onsen — cause old habits never die, although he swears your bare body was the only one he wanted to see — he sneaks in silently until he’s right next to you.

“Hello beautiful” he whispers squatting beside you.

“Jiraiya!” you yelp opening your eyes and looking over your shoulder, “You know this is the women’s area, right?”

But that doesn’t stop the old man from discarding the towel around his waist and entering the hot waters.

“Something about the ‘men are forbidden’ sign at the entrance tipped me off” he kneels holding your waist and getting close enough for you to feel his excitement against your stomach, “Couldn’t wait to see my pretty girl.”

You look at the entrance, afraid someone might catch you two.

“What if someone sees us?”

Jiraiya keeps trailing his kisses down until he wraps his lips around your nipple flicking it with his tongue, he loves how warm your skin is, how soft… in fact he loves everything about you, his closed ones might even say he’s obsessed about you.

“I’m sure we are breaking a law here” you whisper but can’t find yourself doing anything to stop your husband from picking you up and placing you on a rock where your bottom half would be off the water and directly on his mouth’s height as you feel his breath fanning over your folds.

“You’re worth it” he blinks before going fully down on you while holding the back of your thighs. The first thing he notices is how actually hot your pussy is, hotter than normal, just the touch of his chapped lips against your lower lips are enough to make you flinch.

“Jiraiya, wait, I think I’m quite sensitive because of the hot water” you hold on to his white locks.

“Is that so? We should come to places like this more often then” he kisses your inner thigh until your clit carefully minding your sensitiveness. Being apart all this time makes him appreciate your natural scent even more, giving it a long sniff that makes your face heat up at his lack of shame. Even after being together for years his vulgarity still manages to surprise you.

He moves your thighs to his shoulder where he can balance you better and free his hands to play with your tits as he devour your cunt.

“S’ good, love” you mumble with your head throw back, one hand one top of the one pinching your nipple.

Jiraiya sucks your clit working two fingers into your whole as you whine and close your shaky legs around his head.

“Oh sweetheart, you really are sensitive, aren’t you?” he chuckles.

“Y-Yeah, it’s been a long time since we— agh” his thick digits rubs your sweet spot.

“So you missed your old man playin’ with this pussy?” he flattens his tongue on your clit as you rock your hips on his face, “Fuck” he curses retreating one hand that held your hips, “Hold yourself, love” your adjust yourself on the rock so you don’t fall from his shoulders. Jiraiya starts to stroke himself, too aroused by the taste and feeling of your cunt to not do anything.

“Baby” you moan pulling his hair as you feel your orgasm approaching, “Don’t— I wanna cum with you” your whiny tone and teary eyes are everything to him.

“Of course, doll” he maneuvers you down his showers until you wrap your legs around his waist and he holds you by your asscheeks.

“You haven’t even kissed me hello” you pout.

“Haven’t I?” he kisses your cheek, “You sure?” he kisses the other.

“Jiraiya” you call his name in a scolding tone he loves.

“Come to daddy then” he closes his lips on your bottom one, sucking and licking it just like he did earlier to your clit.

The old man guides his cock to your hole and he takes advantage of your gasp getting his tongue inside your mouth, shamelessly making out with his wife so publicly.

He adjusts his grip on you and pulls out just a bit before thrusting again, he felt his own sweat trailing down his body, the humid environment combining with both your sweats generating a loud wet sound of skin slapping skin.

“Jiraiya~ too loud” you moan.

“Afraid someone will hear the sound of my balls hitting your ass?” he bites your neck, “Relax, love” his middle finger moves into the crack of your ass until it reaches your puckered hole, pressing it until it takes his digit, “If someone sees us— ugh” he cuts himself when you tight up around his cock having your asshole stimulated, “I’ll just have to take them down.”

“Fuck—“ he presses his torso against you, hard pecks squeezing your soft breasts, “Too much~” he tries to synchronize the thrusts on your pussy with the pace on your ass.

“You’re taking me so well, sweetheart” his thrusts become sloppier and he’s back at sucking your tongue, “Cummin’ ugh— shit” he groans bullying your insides with his thick cock, turns out he was also more sensitive than usual. The chances of taking you in a hot spring more often become an actual possibility after this.

“Come inside, baby, fill me up” you bite his lip as he curses and increases the speed of his middle finger on your back, the doubled stimulation pushing you through the edge as you moan your husband’s name, “That’s right, princess take it all” he keeps thrusting even after emptying himself inside you, overstimulating himself.

Your head fall on his shoulder, peppering his neck with kisses.

“Baby I wish we could fuck here all night but I don’t wanna be expelled” you kiss his lips sweetly, “Let’s go to my room, yes?”

“You’re no fun” he pulls his soft cock out, carefully placing you down and helping wrap a towel around you.

“If you behave well tonight I might reserve a private spring for us tomorrow morning” you caress his chest, especially the sensitive skin around his scar.

“There’s a private spring here and you didn’t tell me?” he puts his hands on his hips in disbelief.

“Now go, you’re not supposed to be here” you push him away.

“Can’t believe this and i’m the one supposed to behave…” he walks off bare naked and you just hope he doesn’t cross with any lady coming in or she’ll have a 26 centimetres surprise.

#jiraiya smut #jiraiya x reader #jiraiya x you #naruto x reader #naruto smut #— the cliches ™

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soulaires · 5 months

Note

If your still taking requests then can i request a hc for Aaron Warner with a reader thats like the total opposite of him?

Here comes the sun.

pairings: grumpy!aaron warner x sunshine!reader.

summary: you were his sunshine, his light, the reason of living and his beautiful sweet girl.

warnings: grumpy x sunshine trope!!, soft aaron warner, violence and killings (🤭), you guys are in LOOOOVEEE, power couple, this is love actually, chivalry is NOT dead

notes: I actually love doing hcs

(Aaron Warner) tag list 🏷 : @ravisinghs-wife @ab-baybay @aaronwarnerobsessedmylove @cosmicswan

Everyone in the sector was mostly confused than shock that you and warner were dating

i mean everyone know that Aaron Warner Anderson, chief commander and regent of Sector 45, son of the supreme commander of The Reestablishment, has a soft spot for you. You only.

everyone sort of figured out that he was absolutely and immensely devoted and in love with you when he spoke to you with much more gentle and soft tone, looks at you like you are his entire universe (spoiler alert: you are), and of course, how he is very protective of you.

but yet it was such a foreign concept for them to grasp—Aaron Warner? The cruel monster and madman (who also appears to be devilishly handsome) is dating you?

you who is the smart, sweet, charismatic and the poster child? What on earth did you start dating him?

what a typical bad boy and good girl cliché

but of course, while everyone saw the typical cold, snarky, mysterious, commanding leader, you saw your Aaron.

your Aaron who fall first and falls harder every damn time

your Aaron warner who opens the passenger seat at you every time (there’s a rule between you guys that he should always the door for you even when mad or in the middle of the war)

your Aaron who keeps a piece of flower with him every time he gets you a bouquet of your favorite flowers so he would know when it’s dead so he can buy you a new one

he loves listening to you whether it’s something you think it’s dumb, he just encourages you to speak because he loves every little detail of you and just overall love the way you got excited to little things. He also love knowing everything about you.

you sometimes think he doesn’t really listen despite his assurance but he will just randomly say something about it and you goes “aww you remembered”

and he’s just ???? What do you mean he remembered? you and his souls are literally cosmically intertwined and destined to be together in any lifetime of course he remembers!

he is just obsessed with your existence

oh that man is in agony and suffering when you are not with him. his eyes just searching for you.

his emerald eyes lighting up and a smile creeping up to his face when he saw a sight of you

kenji said Warner has become more tolerable because of you

because every time your boyfriend said something sarcastic and insulting, you give him that look and he fixes his attitude and body language and got his shit together.

his first priority is your safety and happiness

“If anything happens to y/n I’m going to kill everyone in this room and myself”

you and Aaron got along really well and he thinks you are always right

and if you’re wrong he will simply reshape the reality so that what you said is correct

you can do no wrong In his eyes

whenever you have a new clothes (that he probably bought) he ask you to do a fashion show for him while he compliments you

“you look absolutely gorgeous, my love”

“that color suits you, love”

“you..you are so…hauntingly beautiful, angel”

he once bought a whole store for you. Literally bought everything you want. The new released book? You have the first copy and it’s signed. Want that dress? It’s yours in every color. Want that bag you saw? It’s on the desk the next day with a flower. New nails? Well, c’mon then he will with you to the appointment. Want that food? He will cook it for you.

“Whatever you want, love. It’s your world.”

aaron who cooks while you look cute on the kitchen counter.

he lets you wear whatever you want even if it’s reveling. He have his gun and machete and is not afraid to use it if someone touched you, looked at you like you are a prey, or when he feels some lust and attraction towards you, well...it wouldn’t be a good thing.

you once gave him a bracelet with a moon jewel twinning with your sun one and boy he absolutely ADORE IT.

he doesn’t let anyone touch it or he had never took it out of his wrist. (you’ll have to kill him before you got that bracelet)

he’s just very protective of his sunshine, one click on the pager and he is RUNNING.

shamelessly threatening everyone that gave you a nasty look.

“every tongue that rises against her will face a consequence of me cutting it and i will gonna make each one of you swallow it.”

“don’t even think about hurting her or I will cut your throat open like a fish.”

he let you practice your eyelining skills on him while you sit on his lap

love to match clothes with you!

he have your eye color made into a beautiful ring

he have your doodles on him tattooed actually

love hearing your thoughts about the book you are currently reading.

he anotates a book for you as a gift

reads every book you ever loved

he does not remove your lipstick stain on his cheecks, hand, lips or even in his blond hair.

after all, he hates everyone except you.

#reader insert #rie answers 🦦#shatter me series #shatter me #aaron warner x reader #aaron warner #aaron warner x you #riewrites 🫀#aaron warner anderson

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slvtforswift · 13 days

Text

the way i loved you

about: you and jack hughes broke up and you decided to go for his friend, trevor zegras, but you seem to miss jack and the dynamic of your relationship (this will be based on the song the way i loved you by taylor swift)

authors note: i’m on a writing spree right now

you were meeting trevor’s family and you honestly loved them. you got along really well with his parents and siblings. especially with his sister, she was really cool. but all you could think about during dinner was your ex-boyfriend’s family. the hughes’s.

you missed jack’s older brother quinn’s sarcastic comments and you missed his younger brother luke’s laughter. you miss his mom’s cooking and his father’s dad jokes. you missed jack’s hugs and kisses and comfort. you miss the way he made you feel, good and bad.

you did enjoy meeting the zegras’ sans being with trevor, but you knew who your heart really belonged to.

after helping his mother clean up from dinner, he took you upstairs to give you a tour of his childhood room.

“wow, trev, you really love models in bikini’s.” you nodded as you looked at the posters around his room.

you also saw a lot of hockey posters on the walls.

“you bet i do.”

you have him a small smile and sat down on his bed.

he sat down beside you and flashed you a smile. “i’m really glad you got to meet my family.”

you nodded and swallowed. “yeah. me too.”

it wasn’t a complete and total lie. you did enjoy meeting them, but you didn’t feel like yourself. you felt out of place.

he leaned in and kissed you. you kissed back and the two of you began making out until you pulled away.

“stop.”

“what?”

“i can’t do this, trevor. i’m sorry.” you said and stood up.

“what’s wrong? did i do something?” he asked.

you shook your head. “no, you didn’t do anything. it’s me. i know that sounds cliché, but it’s true. i…i don’t feel for you what i felt for jack. of course, jack and i weren’t perfect, but that’s what i liked about it. being with you is just too perfect and i don’t belong with you. i belong with jack. i’m sorry.”

trevor swallowed and looked down beside looking back up at you.

“it’s okay. i could tell at dinner that something was going on. you weren’t enjoying yourself. if you do really love him, though, i say go to him. i can do as much as i can to force you to stay here with me, but as much as i try to do that, it’s not going to work, so go. go to him.” trevor responded.

“thank you, trevor. i’m really sorry.” you apologized to him.

“it’s okay, really.”

you nodded and gave him a hug before going downstairs to say goodbye to his family.

you went out to your car and drove to jack’s family’s house as soon as you could.

you rang the doorbell and knocked until it opened to reveal jack’s mother ellen.

“oh my. y/n, dear, what’re you doing here?” ellen questioned.

“i’m here for jack.” you replied.

“y/n’s here?” a voice called.

it was luke’s.

he came over and smiled. “yo, y/n! long time no see! how ya been?”

“um, okay. i’m here to see jack i really need to talk to him.” you answered.

“you need to talk to me about what?”

he walked closer to the door until he was standing next to ellen.

“can i come in and i’ll tell you?” you raised your eyebrows.

ellen looked to him and he nodded.

“sure.”

she let you inside and he took you to his old bedroom to talk. his was decorated differently than trevor’s. less models on the walls.

“what did you need to talk to me about?” jack asked.

“us. i miss you. the way things ended sucked, but that’s what i love. no matter how bad things get, we can always be there for each other. i’m right here, right now to try to get you back because i love you and no one, not even trevor, makes me as happy as you do. if you don’t want me back, that’s okay too, but—.”

the brunette boy cut you off by kissing you.

you kissed back and practically melted into it.

after about thrifty seconds of kissing, the two of you pulled away.

“of course you have me back. i love you too.”

you smiled and kissed him again.

there was clapping heard from outside of the door.

“yeah!” luke exclaimed.

quinn nodded in approval. “nice.”

you blushed and tried not to laugh and jack shook his head.

you didn’t care that the boys were watching, though. you were happy that you were back with jack and that’s all that mattered.

#imagines #the hughes brothers #jack hughes #luke hughes #quinn hughes #vancouver canucks #new jersey devils #hockey #hockey boys #hockey imagines #jack hughes imagine #trevor zegras #anaheim ducks

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igotanidea · 9 months

Text

(3) Cheater : dick grayson!version

Long awaited part 3 - as promised.

@fullbelieverheart - I really hope I'll live up to your expectations of me and this story :D

part 1

part 2

***

9 months ago

“No.”

“This was not a question, Dick.”

“Still the answer is no.”

When Bruce called Dick to the batcave and explained to him his role in the plan The Batman masterminded, Dick felt like laughing.

At first.

Until he realised that Bruce was being absolutely serious with wanting his oldest son to get into a fake relationship with a girl named Sienna. Apparently, she was loosely connected with one of the Gotham’s crime lord and this was a way to get to her relative. It was crazy and to say the least, Dick felt offended at the mere thought of going through with this horrendous idea.

“I’m not a piece of meat, Bruce! And we can’t use an innocent girl for your scheming!”

“but we will.”

“Come on!” Dick threw his hands in the air in pure frustration

“Is this about this little journalist you met?” Bruce grunted at his son “What was her name again? Y/N?”

Dick sighed. He could keep on denying, pretending that he had no idea what Bruce was talking about but there was no point. And maybe, maybe, admitting that he felt something for Y/N would made his adoptive father soften?

“Yes…..” he admits

“Forget about her.”

“What?!”

“You heard me Dick.”

“But…..”

“You have duties to this city.”

“But….!”

“Enough Dick. There are lives at stake. You have to think like Nightwing, not like Dick Grayson, now. Do you want people to die?”

“Please….. Bruce…. Ask someone else for this…. Please….” He tried to bargain, but he knew well enough it was a lost cause. Who else could possibly do the job? Jason?

“End of discussion. “

***

Dick was torn. On one hand he wanted to protect people and get whatever criminal was on the loose down. On the other he also wanted Y/N. It didn’t matter he barely met her. The feelings she gave him were incomparable with anything else. He wanted her with intensity he never thought possible. He knew he couldn’t just go and forget about her. Not with her pretty smile and pretty eyes and her messy hair and her positive energy.

So-

The only option was to play on both fields.

***

“Oh, God! I am so sorry! I swear I can be so clumsy sometimes……”

He choose the most cliché way to become acquainted with Sienna. He simply went to the same coffee shop she did every day and accidentally bumped into her, spilling coffee all over. Of course, it was iced coffee, he wouldn’t risk anyone getting burned.

“Oh, please, it was me! I really should have been watching where I was going!” she retorted

“How about I offer you coffee as a form of compensation?” he grinned

“You just gave me one!” Sienna laughed and Dick couldn’t help but be positively surprised by her sense of humour. “I wouldn’t mind a little snack, thought….. Had a hell of a day and forget to have lunch….”

“Well I can’t really let a pretty girl like you starve.” Dick ginned.

“Oh, so now I am pretty girl?” she raised an eyebrow “you sure you bumped into me because you’re clumsy?”

“Who said clumsy and lucky cannot go in pair?”

Maybe this mission would be nicer than he thought……

***

6 months ago

He found Sienna amusing and charming. But it was still just for vigilante purposes and his eyes were on Y/N. They were. Truly. And to prove it to himself, one day out of the blue he decided to show up at her work, unannounced with the biggest flower bouquet ever. Causing a little bit of commotion and making a show amongst Y/N’s co-workers.

“Hey Y/N….” he smiled, his silhouette barely visible from the grand bunch of forget-me-nots.

“Dick?” her eyes grew wide at the sight in front of him. “It’s not my birthday…..”

“Can’t I just give a little gift to my favourite girl? For no reason? ”

“You’re just unbelievable” she chuckled shaking her head. “and I bet the blue flowers were chosen for no reason…..”

“Sh! You’re gonna blew my cover Y/N!”

“Mhm. Because of the colour of the plants….. As if that were the craziest thing that may uncover your secret identity.”

“And who’s unbelievable now?’ she narrowed his eyes, leaning forward and trying to kiss her.

“Nah uh….” She chuckles pulling back. “not at work….”

“Y/N!” he whined

“not at work.” She insisted

“Come over tonight then….” Dick begged. “Please… I need you

“Tonight you say?”

“please, baby……”

“Wayne gala.” She simply said

“I’m sorry, what?” those two words threw him back into reality “what are you talking about?”

“You little pea brain…..” she cooed, brushing hair out of his forehead and ruffling his mop. “It’s the night of Annual Wayne Gala. Don’t tell me you forgot?” his silence was enough of an answer. “I was seconded for the press coverage. Work night for me.”

“Doesn’t mean we cannot have some fun together later on…..” Dick grabbed her hand, intertwined their fingers and caressing her skin. The gesture was innocent but his eyes were shining with a predatory gaze leaving no room for doubts of what he really meant.

“Are you absolutely sure we can hide from Bruce’s watchful gaze?”

“It’s a big Manor….” Dick smiled suggestively, leaning closer to her “come on, baby. You keep me waiting for so long now…..”

“The famous Dick Grayson, the heartbreaker and forever the bachelor is begging for a girl?”

“Not just any girl…” he smirked “you.” Without any warning he closed the gap between them, kissing her softly with all the feelings he had for her. He loved her. Her loved her…. He loved her, right? “Y/N…” he tangled hand in her hair and brought her closer, not caring who might see them at her work. And apparently, at this point, neither did she. “Come on….” He brushed his lips over her cheek and jaw, eyes closed, breathing her in “Please…..”

“I….” she gasped, overwhelmed by everything he was doing at the moment “I guess I can try to implement some work-life balance…”

“Good girl…..” he whispered, kissing her lips again and she shivered at those words. He was right. She was keeping him waiting for long.

“I’ll see you tonight then, Grayson.” Gathering what was left of her self-control she pushed him away from her, standing up abruptly and fixing her hair “I gotta get back to work now.”

“I’ll see you tonight then.” He grinned, grabbing her tightly by the waist, pulling her close and kissing once more with untamed passion, before moving away, grinning like a school boy and exiting the office, leaving the poor girl flustered and distracted.

***

“Dick!”

Dick was all ready for the Wayne Gala and for the little after party with Y/N, creating some wild scenarios in his head. But once he entered the main room, already filled with the big fish, his eyes searching for his girl in the sea of heads Sienna came right through to him.

“Sienna?” He smiled, but it felt ground slip beneath his feet “what are you doing here?”

“Bruce invited me.” She handed him a glass of champagne and he tossed it off in a second. “Cause apparently the scatterbrain of my boyfriend forgot about the event of the year…..”

“Hm?” Dick muttered, his mind elsewhere “What? I mean, yes, of course, you know me..” he chuckled nervously “I never were a fan of this whole gala thing. Haha. None of my brothers ever were….”

“And yet, here we both are….I only wish the press weren’t so insistent.” Sienna took a sip of her own drink. “There’s this one reporter, Y/N. She tried to talk to me and get my opinion on some social case……”

“You… you talked to Y/N?!” Dick almost choked at the mini sandwich he grabbed from the tray.

“Yes! She’s a girl boss. You should meet her, Dick. Bet she would take you down with her no man’s bullshit attitude.” Sienna laughed “God, we could make such a good friends…. Oh, look! She’s right there! Talking to your brother.”

“Which brother?!” Dick’s started sweating. Please don’t let it be….

“Jason, I suppose. Seems like they are having fun together.”

“Oh, shit!” Dick hissed. Jason knew everything about this whole mission thing. And he had a really loose tongue.

“Dick? Are you all right, love?” now, Sienna seemed truly concerned, trying to meet Dick’s gaze.

“I’m perfect, dear. Would you like to dance with me?”

“I thought you hated this gala thing? And everything that came with it?”

“Well, I got a pretty girl by my side and …..” only now he get the chance to eye Sienna from head to toe. “You look beautiful.”

“Thank you. So glad you noticed.” She snickered

“So, will you do me the honour?” Dick reached his hand and once Sienna took it, lead her to the dancefloor, joining some other couples.

While he might have had Sienna in his arms, the only person on his mind was definitely Y/N. His gaze never left her figure during the dance and the only thing that saved him from any possible questions was that it was a slow dance and Sienna clung to him tightly, her head resting on his shoulder, eyes closed, enjoying them moving together.

But –

This was also the source of the trouble in the form of Y/N noticing another girl being so close to Dick. Too close. And once Dick spotted her shocked gaze, her hurt face expression, the disbelief radiating from her whole body he knew he was doomed. And Jason, who was standing next to Y/N, barely holding a laugh was not helpful at all, making Dick count the seconds till the end of the song, and desperately and silently call his younger brother for help.

Obviously, Jason was not without heart and he would have to be completely blind to not notice the suffering of Dick’s and him making a fool out of himself. So after a while of not-so-discreet laughing his ass off he actually decided to give Dick a hand. He knew that anyone connected to Batman and actually listening to him would be suffering. No matter how strained the relationship between Dick and Jason was, the latter liked Y/N. And to tell the truth, Jason wanted to save her heartbreak. If that meant letting Dick talk to his girl and keeping Sienna occupied for a while, he could deal with it. For Y/N;s sake, obviously.

“Excuse-me dance?” Jason teased approaching Dick and Sienna.

“Hey…. Honey… would you mind Jace keeping you entertained for a moment, while I go talk to that journalist you mentioned? Oldest son, gotta keep the appearances that I actually know what I’m doing here…..” Dick stuttered

“Which he obviously doesn’t” Jason hissed

Sienna looked between two brothers, a bit confused of what was happening, but finally nodding her head.

“Sure, love. You go talk to the press. Hopefully your younger brother won’t trample me….” She chuckled and kissed Dick on the lips lightly before letting go of his hand and allowing him to run of the dancefloor.

Shit….

“Y/N!” he hissed. Apparently, before talking to the press, he will have to chase it first. “Y/N, wait!” he grabbed her wrist, before she could leave the Manor, spinning her around so that she was forced to face him.

“What the hell, Dick?! Let go off me!” she struggled against his grip

“Please, let’s just talk about it….” He begged “I can explain.”

“Explain why you had another girl holding you and kissing you?! What are you playing!?”

“Come on, let’s not make a scene, Y/N!”

“No. Let’s!” she had every right to be angry but Dick could not let her unleash her inner destroyer in front of all the guest. So before she could do or say anything else, he grabbed her waist and pushed her into the first empty room, pressing her into the wall inside and capturing her lips in his.

“Y/N….” he whined, feeling her kiss him back, turning all hot, his hands roaming her entire body in the frantic need of her. Right there, right now. He wanted her. And he was going to have her. After all that was the plan all along and if it were to happen a little faster than expected.. so be it. “Y/N….” his moan died halfway when his hand slide down her leg, sneaking under the hem of her dress and moving up again, lifting the material, trying to touch her where he knew she needed. “I love you…..”

Those three little words seemed to bring her back to reality.

“You love me, huh?” she wriggled out of his grip making him groan at the loss. “How dare you say that?!”

“Ok, fine… I owe you some explanation….”

“You owe me so much more than just some explanation.” She crossed arms over her chest ”are you with her? Is she your girlfriend?”

“NO!”

“Then what is this about?!”

“Batman.” He muttered

“I’m sorry, what?” she raised an eyebrow at him

“It’s Batman and Nightwing thing. Bruce is… after a criminal apparently and sienna… she’s the way to get to him….”

“So you’re just using her!? That’s even worse!”

“I’m not using her! I never promised her anything!”

“You let her kiss you!”

“It doesn’t mean a thing!”

“Do you even know women, Grayson!?”

“I want to be with you…! Please, you have to believe me, Y/N, I swear!” he grabbed both her hands. “Look at me.” She averted her gaze “Please, look at me….” She was still disobeying so in desperation he grabbed her chin and forced her eyes on him “I know you hate me now and you have every right to do so. I should have told you about this and I’m sorry.”

“Are you now?”

“Yes. Please. I only want you. You hear me?” he leaned forward slightly, their foreheads touching “You, baby. I wish it wasn’t so hard, but sometimes… sometimes I have to act like Nightwing and not like Dick Grayson. But it doesn’t mean I love you any less.” She sighs deeply at the confession processing everything he just dropped on her. “Please baby, say something, anything.”

“She’s actually a very nice and smart girl, you know?”

“But I want you….”

“Shut up, Grayson. You say it’s hard for you, but do you have any idea how hard it is for me to go against another girl’s back?”

“I’m sorry….” He squeaked, holding her hand tighter.

“I’m not gonna leave….” Y/N starts.

“You won’t?!” his eyes lighten up a bit at the words.

“No. However…. If we are to pursue our relationship further… do… all those things you want to do…..” at this point Dick felt himself getting hard at the mere thought of having Y/N. “if you want me, you’ll have to finish that stupid mission first. I won’t sleep with you while you still with her.”

“But it’s all fake!”

“Even if it’s fake.” Y/N emphasised.

“But….!”

“No buts. I’m here, but like I said, no betraying another girl like that. Not while she might be in love with you, you hear me? I can wait, can you?”

“Yes….” He hung his head low. “Yes, I can wait for you, but you’re making it really hard for me Y/N.”

Now

“ What the fuck is going on here?!” Sienna’s voice echoed through the apartment.

Shit… Shit… shit….

They were in so much of a deep shit…..

#dick grayson x reader #nightwing x reader #dick grayson smut #nightwing smut #dick grayson x oc #dick grayson imagine #dick grayson x you #dick grayson fanfiction #dick grayson #nightwing x y/n #nightwing x oc #nightwing x you #dc dick grayson #dc smut #smut #dick grayson angst #nightwing angst

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foreverinadais · 2 years

Text

after an argument: hc

(part 2: part 1 here!) this ended up taking way longer than i imagined woops

STEVEN:

the silent treatment he had been giving you eventually turns into reflection time.

the outcome? he feels like a complete dick.

so he when he sees your sitting on the sofa, he would come and sit next to you, his hands placed awkwardly on his knees

he would sneak peaks at you as if to get your attention because our love can’t directly make the first move after confrontation

finally, you would sigh and face him

to which he would pretend to be really interested in whatever was on the tv.

“Steven?”

then he would spill.

“I’m sorry I was such an arse and for the stupid argument. I was acting immature and you don’t deserve that and if there’s anyway I can make it up to you-”

You would interrupt him with a much calmer, “Steven.” and add, “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I was stupid to do anything to risk what we have.”

You could see the hidden fear in his eyes and shook your head.

“You won’t lose me. besides, people in relationships argue!” He isn’t convinced, muttering a string of apologies again.

“I’m not mad anymore, okay? It’s done.”

Steven is relieved. Like super relieved. he physically breathes a sigh of relief.

And he hesitantly reaches out to take your hand

to which you offer a smile and snuggle into his side.

“Wow.” Steven suddenly whispers

“Hmm?”

“I just love you. And am so lucky to have you, my love.”

to which you smile, because your equally lucky to have him- even when he is sassy.

MARC:

okay so i feel like he would want to avoid direct confrontation

but would still obviously want to apologise.

so say your asleep and he sneaks into the flat

has gotten a bunch of flowers or something cliché that he debated on getting but decided he needs something romantic to add to his apology.

he doesn’t want to wake you, plans to just leave the flowers in a vase and cook you breakfast.

but he stubs his toe on the side as he walks in and cusses loudly.

of course, you wake up instantly, slightly delirious from your sleep.

“Steven?”

he cringed at himself, inhaling deeply before muttering a small ‘nope’.

“Oh.”

Marc knows he’s fucked up by the sadness in your tone.

your sit up, noticing the flowers and he follows your gaze and sighs.

“Look, Y/N, I fucked up. And I’m sorry.”

he paces forward and places the flowers on the bedside table

It’s kinda funny to see big, scary Marc Spector be so shy

and you don’t really know what to do

cause your still pissed at him.

“You upset me, marc. I just care about you, is all. when you get hurt, it hurts me. And I’m powerless to it, you know?”

“I know, baby. I know. I got, defensive and it was wrong of me.”

he feels emotional and turns away from you for a moment.

“Just not really used to people caring about me. I just don’t want to scare you off, or risk losing you. It doesn’t give me an excuse, I know. I’m sorry.”

He sniffles, would desperately try to stop any tears.

But you saw him. Saw all his insecurity, all his pain, all his worry.

and you instantly would get up from the bed, wrap your arms round his waist.

“I know, darling. We can work on it, okay? But we don’t have to right now.”

to which you would gently urge him to turn around.

“C'mere.”

and he accepts your embrace, softly sniffles into your shoulder as you stroke his back.

“Let’s go to bed, yeah?”

and he agrees.

and you both lie down, you guiding him to rest his head on your chest as you gently play with his hair

both slowly realising you can work on your problems together.

JAKE

“I’m worried, mate. She could be anywhere.”

“She isn’t answering our texts.”

“Fuck sake, Jake.”

after you left, of course all 3 of them would be freaking out.

Jake would eventually take control- or lose it.

going back to his bottle but slowly

truth was, he was more worried than anyone.

this was his fault

so if anything happened to you, that would be on him.

and he would never forgive himself

he was pacing the room, calling your phone yet again, practically screaming in frustration when he heard your voicemail.

that was until the door opened.

you half expected one of the others to be fronting, or for Jake not to be there at all.

but to your slight dismay, there he was, instantly turning to face you and throwing his phone on the sofa.

you would take off your jacket, not even bothering to face him.

then walk straight to the bathroom for a shower, avoiding contact at all.

“You need to sort this out, Jake. Just say sorry.”

he knew he had too. just didn’t know how to communicate it

and all you wanted, no, needed, was for him to communicate.

you come out the shower and to his dismay, your wearing one of your own night tops and not one of his

and you get a glass of water before going to bed.

but before you can, Jake clears his throat.

“Y/N.”

to which you would stop in your tracks, slightly turning to him so he knows he has some of your attention.

“Are you hurt?”

“What?”

“You were gone for so long, I thought you might’ve got-”

“Are you kidding? I was ‘gone for so long’ because you told me to leave, remember?”

okay, tensions were still high

and i have a feeling Jake is stubborn

Jake would stop talking for a moment as he watches you shake your head slightly

“I was angry.”

“well I’m still angry.”

and the atmosphere would be so tense.

one wrong word, and it could all snap.

“What do you want me to do?”

and you scoff.

“Honestly? I want you to be honest. Jake, do you want me?”

“What?”

“You hardly say it.”

“What?”

“You hardly say you love me! and maybe I’m selfish but you don’t act like you love me sometimes. I want, I want you to talk to me and be open to me and want me in the way I want you! Because I can’t keep doing this.”

Oh.

That- he feels his stomach turn in dread, feels his head fill with fire. But mostly, he feels the way his heart breaks slightly.

of course he loves you.

but it was fucking terrifying to admit

you mistake his silence for agreeance and you feel tears well in your eyes

because this is your biggest fear; that one of them could fall out of love with you.

“I’m going to bed.”

the sentence sends chills down his spine in the worst way

and he shakes out of his thoughts, rushing forward.

“No no no, wait. I’m sorry. Sometimes I can’t find the words for you, Y/N, but it’s not because I don’t want to or because I don’t care but it’s because for you, I feel so deeply. I can cope with pain, lord knows I can, but this... loving you means the possibility of losing you and I can’t live with that.”

none of them can

and you pause again, putting down the water and turning to him with watery eyes.

“It doesn’t make up for what happened. I mean it, Jake. We can’t keep doing this thing where we fight and then fuck, and then forget about it.”

“I won’t. I will try and make it up to you, Cariño, every single day. And I might not be able to open up like the others do, but I will try. I will try for you.”

and you finally nod slightly, tears falling freely now.

“okay.”

and he sighs in utter relief and it’s overwhelming what he feels for you

he walks over and kisses you fiercely and you pause for a moment before returning the gesture

but the dominance dies down, leaving a gentle, loving kiss, making your head dizzy

and finally, Jake says with as much certainty as you have ever heard, “Te quiero. I love you, mi amor.”

and whilst you know it’ll take a while, your willing to wait.

for them, you would wait an eternity

because they are your eternity.

cliché little ending to make up for the angst of p1 hehe. hope you enjoyed :)

#Moon Knight #moon knight imagine #moon knight headcanon #Steven Grant #marc spector x reader #jake lockely #marc spector #steven grant x reader #jake lockely x reader #steven with a v #angst #fluff #ff #headcannons

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vampynights · 10 months

Text

CLYDE (ELECTRICK CHILDREN) — hanging on the telephone

✰summary: clyde’s not the conventional type to bring home and your parents make that abundantly clear. still, he’s desperate to keep you in his life somehow. do you choose between the approval and love of the people who keep a roof over your head, or the boy who made you feel alive for the first time ever?

✰warnings: cursing, smoking and weed usage (i’ve never actually smoked so bear with me), mentions of drinking, lots of tension, pretty slowburn (this is kinda an understatement, it took around 6,000 words to get to the lovers part), angst with comfort, unhealthy relationships with parents, afab reader, reader uses she/her pronouns

✰a/n: this is not only the first fic (or oneshot) i’ve written in a while but also my first ever clyde fic so please excuse any mistakes!!! i’m open to any requests for clyde seeing as there isn’t enough fanfiction of him out there.

✰words: 14.3k (it's a long one so strap in.)

————————————

Meeting Clyde was an accident but to her, it was almost a blessing.

Y/N didn’t intend on letting it go as far as it did. He was just the weird stoner kid she met at a music venue. If you asked her, she’d tell you the story of how they met was as cliché as it could get. Girl bumps into boy with a drink, boy shrugs it off and promptly begins flirting with her, and they hit it off almost immediately. She’d never been to something like that before and it was obvious but Clyde was nice enough to make sure she didn’t feel too out of place (or bump into any more people.)

By the end of the night, the two were walking around the streets of Las Vegas, talking endlessly about everything and anything that popped into their minds. Both of them knew that by bringing up a random story or question, they were simply procrastinating saying goodbye to one another, yet neither of them bothered to point it out or put an end to it.

“Okay so- wait. You’ve never gone, like, fucking rogue on your parents for not even a day? What, do you just stay at home and shit?” Clyde is inebriated and exasperated, running a hand through his hair with one hand while the other raises to his mouth and grabs the cigarette in between his lips. He blows out the smoke and Y/N lets her gaze linger on the sight for a few seconds before looking at the street ahead, shaking her head.

“I mean…yeah? I’m not really the type to disobey my parents for no reason. I didn’t feel any need to.” She looks down and kicks a pebble in front of her. She can feel Clyde staring at her but she refuses to make eye contact, weirdly embarrassed by her admission.

“Yet here you are walking around with a random guy at night, real fucking smart. Were you even allowed to go to that venue?” He asks, laughing as he raises the cigarettes to his lips again.

“Nope,” she replies, emphasizing the ‘P’. She shoves her hands into the pockets of her jacket and looks around. It’s surprisingly vacant, though she assumes it’s because they’ve unknowingly departed from the busier streets and are now walking around aimlessly.

“Well aren’t you just a little rebel-“ he begins to tease her though is cut off by a harsh shove, making him laugh and stumble to the side. She playfully glares at him and flips him off.

“Shut the fuck up?” She giggled. “I bet you’re probably a fucking nuisance to your parents.” Though it’s a rather mean statement, Clyde knows she’s only joking through the smile that spreads across her face. He smiles back and for a split second Y/N swears she feels her heart skip.

“Well actually,” he raises the cigarette to his lips again, “I don’t live with them anymore. Well, technically I don’t.”

Y/N feels a tinge of guilt for even bringing up the subject of his parents after hearing that, though Clyde is quick to notice the way her smile falters and he quickly adds to his sentence.

“Not that I really give a shit though, I like being on my own a lot better than staying over there. It’s suffocating,” he says through the cigarette in between his lips.

“How come?”

“I don’t know, they’re like…not supportive of who I am and shit?” Clyde shrugs and runs a hand through his hair. Y/N feels as though he’s excluding a large majority of the story though drops it. She instead chooses to focus on how they’re approaching her neighborhood. She sighs, disappointed at the prospect of having to leave Clyde. He glances over at her from the corner of his eye at the sound and then directs his attention to where hers is, staring at a street sign in front of them.

“Is uh- is this where you live?” He asks her, holding the cigarette between his fingers before flicking it and throwing it on the ground, stepping on it with his shoe to put it out. Y/N nods and then turns to face him. They’re both silent for a few seconds, staring at each other awkwardly as they try to formulate a proper goodbye.

“This was…fun,” she eventually speaks, her lips pursing together into a tight smile. Clyde nods and smiles as well, though he is a lot more relaxed.

“Can I get your number?” He blurts out. Her eyes widen only slightly before she quickly begins digging into her bag, pulling out a pink flip phone with small bedazzled jewels on it. She holds it out for Clyde to take and he laughs at the sight, grabbing it and inspecting it.

“Cute,” is all he says as he flips it open and begins putting his number into her phone. He pulls out his own and puts her number into his, Y/N staring in awkward silence.

He shuts both phones and hands hers back, beginning to walk backward and away from her. “I’ll call you!” He shouts out to her, waving goodbye. She waves back, standing in place and watching him leave. Looking back down at her phone, she can’t help but grin wildly and laugh to herself as she walks back home, a blush spread across her cheeks the whole time.

———

It takes Clyde two days to call her. In those two days she did nothing but think of him. The way he pat her shoulder after she profusely apologized for spilling her drink on him, the way he whispered into her ear whenever someone he knew walked past and he had a strong opinion on them he just needed to share, and the way he asked her to walk with him before the band they were watching even finished performing all snuck their way into her mind throughout the day.

What was in the forefront of her mind however was his smile. The smile he gave her as he offered to be her ‘guide’, the smile he gave her when she told him her name and the smile he gave her as they said goodbye. If there was anything she learned about him after the night they spent together, it was that he would very easily become her new favorite person.

She was in her bedroom when he called, flipping through a fashion magazine while lying on her bed. Laying on her stomach with her legs swinging in the air, she mindlessly stared at the model on the page in front of her, though her mind was anywhere but on the skirt she was showcasing. Coincidentally enough, she was thinking about Clyde when the loud ringing alarmed her out of her thoughts.

She jumped and got up, racing towards her phone on the dresser and picking it up to see the caller's I.D. Her heart raced as she read the name and she purposefully waited for the phone to ring for just a couple more seconds before picking it up to avoid looking eager.

“Hello?” She could hear Clyde’s voice clearly through the speaker and her heart raced. It had only been two days since they met yet it felt like an eternity since she had heard his voice.

“Hi,” she breathed out, subconsciously checking herself out in the mirror and fixing her hair as if Clyde could see her.

“What are you doing?” He asks and she can hear muffled music in the background as if he were listening to a live band in a different room.

“Uhm nothing really…just doing some light reading…” she glances over at the magazine on her bed and paces her room.

“Light reading? What the fuck is that?” He laughs on the other end and Y/N bites her lip to try and control the smile on her face. Sighing, she sits down on her bed and flips another page of the magazine absentmindedly.

“Doesn’t matter. What are you doing? Sounds like you’re at a venue or something again.” She runs a finger down the page.

“Close but not really. I’m uh watching some friends practice…they’re in a band and shit. They’re actually kinda good but y’know music is subjective and all that bullshit so maybe you won’t agree,” he mumbled into the phone, and she laughed in response. Laying down on her back, she stared up at her ceiling and tapped her fingers on her stomach.

“Right…I’m sure they’re good. Well if they’re anything like the bands we heard the other night, they were amazing.”

Clyde chuckles and clears his throat. “Yeah no they were great…they’re actually playing again at the same venue next week…if you wanna go check it out.”

“The same venue only a week later? Wouldn’t they wanna broaden where they play and stuff?” Y/N furrows her eyebrows and rolls over on her side.

“Well they’re small bands and a shit ton of people usually go over there so…either way, it’s better for us cause it’s closer. So are you in or nah?”

Y/N takes a moment to think. She was dying to see him again though the prospect of going against her parent's rule of sneaking out at night wasn’t one she was intending to break more than just once a month. Still, she found herself abandoning all logic and agreeing. “Yeah, sure. What day?” She tries to sound casual though a bit of excitement shines through her tone.

“Next Wednesday at 11 pm. Don’t worry, I won’t keep you out long like last time,” he laughs, “unless you want me to.”

Her heart skips at his words and she can practically hear his smirk over the phone. “We’ll see.” She’s trying her best to play it cool despite the tremor in her hands.

“Cool.”

And with that, they’re left in awkward silence for a few seconds. Y/N thinks of what to say and though she really, really doesn’t want to come off as desperate, she can’t help but ask the question that’s been nagging her ever since the day before.

“How come it took you two days to call?”

There’s a brief pause on Clyde’s end that makes her panic. Did she freak him out? Was she being overbearing? Was two days a reasonable amount of time to wait before calling someone and she was just clingy? His laughing cut off her train of thought.

“Missed me?” He asked teasingly. She felt her cheeks grow warm from embarrassment but he spoke before she could defend herself. “I’m gonna be honest I just got kinda busy. Trust me when I say I wanted to call you, though.”

Y/N smiles widely, not bothering to push it back. The confirmation that he had also been thinking about her, maybe not as much as she was thinking of him, but that she was on his mind at all overjoyed her. She twirled a strand of her hair around her finger and closed her eyes.

“I’ll believe you. For now.”

He snickered at her last statement and opened his mouth to reply before a voice other than his could be heard from the phone. She couldn’t tell whose voice it was, though the person seemed agitated with him. She stared at her nails as she waited for Clyde to speak to her.

“Listen, I gotta go but I’ll call you again soon, alright? And if not, I’ll see you on Wednesday. Kay?”

She was disappointed at the fact that their call had to be cut short though nodded to his words before remembering he couldn’t see her. “Uh- yeah! See you.”

They exchanged a quick goodbye before hanging up the phone. Y/N flipped hers shut and set it down on top of her chest, her hands resting on her stomach as she smiled up at her ceiling. She knew it’d be a long week before Wednesday came.

—------------

She didn’t understand what part of her behavior may have changed throughout the week, though to her parents, it was fairly obvious that she was a little too happy. The next Monday Y/N could sense something was off the moment she stepped foot into the dining room. The atmosphere was tense almost, and what made things worse was Y/N couldn’t pinpoint why. Did they somehow know about her secret rendezvous? Maybe she was too loud on the phone the night before? Or perhaps they knew she snuck out the other night. They wouldn’t have waited this long to confront her, however.

As she approached her seat at the dinner table, she cautiously stared up at her father through her eyelashes and pulled out her chair. Her father was too busy setting the table to notice.

“Y/N! Can you come help me set the plates?” Her mother called out to her from the kitchen, startling her. She let go of the chair and began to walk towards the kitchen, taking one last glance at her father before directing her attention to her mother. She paced around the kitchen grabbing plates from cabinets, forks and knives from the drawers on the counters, and began transferring the food from the pots and pans onto the plates. Y/N walked over slowly and grabbed a plate, taking hold of a large spoon and scooping out some of the rice in the container to pour it onto the plate. The air felt a little lighter in there, and they both did their tasks in mutual silence for a minute before her mother began speaking.

“You seem happy lately. Anything new?” It was an innocent question. Her mother was usually the type to inquire about her life so this wasn’t completely out of the ordinary. The guilt from sneaking out three nights ago plagued Y/N’s mind, however, and what once was a warm and comforting inquiry of how she was doing now became a terrifying interrogation. Y/N tried her best to remain calm and continued to fill the plate with food, setting it down and reaching over the counter to wash a spoon in her hands.

“Nothing new, just happy that it’s summer,” she replied cooly, mentally applauding herself for responding without a shake in her voice. Her mother hummed in response and left the kitchen with a plate in her hands, walking out to the dining room. Y/N turned the sink off and sighed under her breath, looking down and gripping the counter with her hands. She was definitely not made for the lifestyle of sneaking out against her parent's permission. She ran a hand through her hair and took a deep breath, grabbing her plate and walking out to the dining room.

Her father was seated already, flipping through a newspaper while her mother set a plate down in front of him. Y/N fought back the urge to roll her eyes at his inability to make his own plate and placed her plate down on the table. She silently walked back into the kitchen and looked in the fridge for something to drink. Her family wasn’t the type to drink anything deemed ‘unhealthy’, meaning the only things available to drink were water and homemade juices. She’d rather drink her own piss than ingest an entire cup of her mother's kale juice, so she instead opted for a water bottle. She’d kill to drink some soda, however.

As she walked back to the table she found her mother and father already seated, staring at her expectantly. It was uncanny, almost, the way they both looked over in her direction at the same time and smiled. She froze for a split second and smiled back (though it came off as more of a grimace), her teeth in full display before she continued to walk back to her seat. She sat down and smoothed out her pants before looking down at her food and closing her eyes. Before every meal, they were expected to pray.

‘Oh heavenly father,” her father began, sighing deeply as he intertwined his hands in front of his plate, “we thank you for the opportunity to be blessed with the food in front of us and we are grateful for the roof over our heads and for each other. Thank you for my wonderful wife who prepared this delicious meal, and thank you for my truehearted daughter who continues to stay on the right path, the path that you have created for her.” His prayer continued, though Y/N tuned out.

The guilt was eating at her. Her father sat just inches away praising her for her obedience and loyalty to god, when just three nights before she was out on the streets with a boy who she knew very well both her parents and God wouldn’t approve of. Not that she really gave a damn about God anyway. He was always something her parents believed in and pressured her to believe in as well. Her doubt of his existence didn’t make her guilt any better, though. Even though she knew deep down she didn’t fully believe in him, she didn’t completely deny him either. And if he did exist as her parents insisted, was she just a horrible person and daughter for doubting that? She already felt like a horrible daughter for sneaking out the way she did. For years her parents publicly and privately praised her for being the “most well behaved child they’d ever seen.” They had confidence in her that she’d always do the right thing, and made it abundantly clear that if she were to ever, ever, disobey them she’d be betraying their trust completely. She was too caught up in her thoughts and failed to notice both of her parents staring at her worriedly.

“Y/N?” Her mother reached out and grabbed her arm, gently shaking her. Y/N snapped back into reality and blinked, staring down at her food and then looking at her parents. “Are you okay sweetheart?” Her mother asked. Y/N could only nod and grab her fork, stabbing into the meat on her plate and shoving it into her mouth.

—--------------

Wednesday night, Y/N found herself pacing her room in an attempt to relieve the anxiety that surrounded her like a dark cloud. She’d gotten past the first two stages of her plan: she kissed both her parents goodnight and waited for them to fall asleep before hiding out in her room like a hermit. She placed a bunch of pillows under her blanket strategically to look like a body (something she’d learned from the corny sitcoms she was allowed to watch. She found it ridiculous though did it anyways,) and began getting ready. She didn’t own a lot of clothing that would be deemed ‘appropriate’ for the occasion and ended up wearing a loose black dress that stopped just short of her knees. She put on a leather jacket that she stole from a friend who had a lot more freedom to wear whatever they wanted, and some dark brown eyeshadow to try and give herself a more ‘edgy’ look. She assumed that’s what Clyde would be into based on the appearances of the girls he hung around with.

It was a struggle to get out of her house without making any noise. She had to take off her shoes while she walked down the stairs and past her parents’ room to avoid any creaking in the floors, and it took her almost three minutes to unlock and open the door without making any noise. By the time she stepped out of her house, it was 10:55 pm and she had to be at the venue by 11, though her house was about a ten-minute walk from there. She was now not only incredibly nauseous from the fact that she was sneaking out in the first place but also that she had only 5 minutes to get there on time. Maybe he wouldn’t be there on time? He seemed like the type of guy who was never actually on time for stuff, so maybe, just maybe, she’d get there before him. Right?

Wrong.

By the time she did get to the venue, sweaty and out of breath, she could see him standing against a wall with his arms crossed, smoking a cigarette. She didn’t understand why he smoked so much but decided now was definitely not the right time to ask any questions like that. She nervously walked up to him, trying to get a good look at his face underneath the colorful lights above them to gauge his mood and decide whether or not it was smart to actually go say hi or if she should just walk away and never talk to him again. It was hard to actually pinpoint his mood however, seeing as he remained rather stoic as he stared out at the street in front of him. He must have sensed her presence before he glanced over from the corner of his eye, and his eyebrow twitched just slightly. He pulled the cigarette away from his mouth and threw it on the ground, stepping over it before cooly walking over to her. She stayed frozen in place.

“Took you long enough. Was starting to think you wouldn’t show,” he mumbled, shoving his hands in the pockets of his navy blue hoodie as he walked towards her. Y/N laughed quietly, looking down at her shoes to avoid his gaze.

“Sorry. Turns out sneaking out of your house with the intention of meeting up with someone is a lot harder than just sneaking out in general,” she was about to explain herself in further detail, feeling as if she needed to or else he’d get mad before he laughed and place an arm around her shoulder casually. Her eyebrows rose and she stiffened under his touch though didn’t make an effort to shove him off or anything. He was warm. She smiled softly as he began to lead her into the venue, rambling about how the bands already started but they weren’t missing out on much.

—--------------------

That was a month ago. Every day since then, they have been in contact somehow, whether it was exchanging phone calls or texts, or meeting up with each other. They started hanging out more during the day as well, with Y/N lying and saying she was visiting her friends from church. The guilt of lying to her parents and disobeying them grew every day, though her affection towards Clyde was growing at an even more rapid rate. The guilt was worth it if it meant she got to see him one more time. One day, they were in his…room? She still didn’t know what to call it, she just knew that’s where he stayed most of the time. They both sat on his bed with their hands in the air, in the middle of a game of ‘Never Have I Ever’. Y/N was obviously winning with only three fingers down, meanwhile, Clyde had eight of them.

“Okay sooo…” she began before smirking mischievously. Clyde sighed and rolled his eyes, a small smile on his face as well.

“Ah shit you’re about to kill me, aren’t you?” He asked, giggling as Y/N placed a finger over his lips and shushed him.

“Shhshhhshhh….never have I ever smoked.”

Clyde narrowed his eyebrows at her. “Gotta be more specific. Like weed or cigs or-”

“Just put the finger down, Clyde, we both know you’ve inhaled any smoke you can think of naming,” Y/N laughs and grabs Clyde’s hand, forcing a ninth finger down as Clyde scoffed.

‘I’m asking you, dumbass. What haven’t you smoked?” He asks, causing Y/N to go silent and stare. Clyde stares back. It shouldn’t have been a surprise. Over the past month, the two had gotten close enough to have a basic understanding of each other and their families, and Clyde knew damn well that she wasn’t experienced with any of that. In response to her silence, he chuckles and gets up, walking towards a book bag in the corner of the room. Y/N watches him wordlessly, having a growing suspicion of what he is going to pull out. She’s proven right when he turns around with a large smirk on his face, a tiny ziplock baggie in his hand with weed in it. Y/N scoffs and rests her back on the wall, her knees going up to her chest.

“Wanna try? You don’t have to if you don’t want to, I just notice how you’ve been eyeing my shit whenever I smoke,” says as he approaches the bed, going to the bedside table next to it and digging through it. She couldn’t find the courage to correct him and tell him that the reasoning behind her staring when he smoked was because she thought he was attractive, not because she wanted to try it though. She stared as he went through the drawer, thinking through the pros and cons of what would happen if she smoked with him.

She did have a bit of a curiosity when it came to smoking and drinking, though her parents always told her it was a sin to do either. Though she was already sinning by being in this room with Clyde, she figured there’d be no harm in trying. He made a small ‘aha’ noise once he found whatever it was he was looking for and sat down in the bed in front of her, setting the items down. Aside from the baggie of weed, there were what Y/N understood to be cigar papers (from what Clyde had described it to look like in one of their previous conversations). Clyde picks it up and waves it around in front of her face.

“Let’s see if you’ve been paying attention to anything I’ve said in the past,” he mumbled, setting it down and taking the weed out of the baggie. “What’s that? Do you know?” He nods towards the cigar papers. Y/N hesitated to answer, afraid of being wrong and embarrassing herself, though when she looked at Clyde’s face she saw nothing but a warm fondness in his eyes that made her whole body warm up. She knew he wouldn’t actually judge her, maybe tease and poke fun at her, but no real judgment would ever be made.

“Uhm…cigar papers?” She answered, wincing a bit at the end of her response. Clyde’s smile eases her anxieties, however, and he laughs as he begins to pack the weed into the papers.

“Shit, you have been listening! Good job.”

The praise goes straight to her stomach as she feels it twist and turn. She was falling deep, a little too deep. She smiles in return and watches his movements. The two are silent for a few minutes, comfortable just enjoying each other's company. Once Clyde finishes, he holds up the blunt and rotates it in front of Y/N’s face.

“Okay, serious talk now. You seriously don’t gotta do it if you don’t want to. I know your family have your own fucking reservations and shit about this type of shit,” he warns her, his tone genuinely rather stern. Y/N smiles at his concern.

“Clyde, seriously, it’s fine. I wanna try. Plus, I’m not too concerned about anything bad happening, I mean, you smoke this stuff all the time, right?” Clyde nods and searches his pockets for his lighter. When he can’t find it, he begins lifting the blankets and pillows to find it around his bed.

“Yeah but this is your first time and well…shit get’s weird on your first time. I got you though. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

Y/N’s almost glad he's preoccupied searching for his lighter so he can’t see her face after he says that. Little does she know he’s glad his lighter was hidden somewhere under his covers so he didn’t have to look her in the eyes and accidentally show off the blush that sneaked its way up to his cheeks. Once he finds it he chuckles to himself and glances over at Y/N, who is nervously staring at him.

“Alright, you ready?”

—---------------------------

It wasn’t a surprise that Y/N was high out of her mind from only a couple of hits. Clyde watched amused as she lay on his bed, staring up at his ceiling and rambling about god knows what. If he’s being honest, he stopped tuning in ten minutes into her rant and gave up trying to make sense of what she was saying. He was having just as much fun watching her fall into deep relaxation. He’d always found her to be on edge constantly, even when it was just the two of them in a secluded area, so to see her openly say what was on her mind with no hesitation was a sight to behold. And he was beholding it alright.

As he listened to her rant he sat up and reached over to the bedside table and grabbed a water bottle, holding it out so she could take a sip. She whined and pushed it away, making him laugh and grab her hand. “C’mon dude you gotta drink something. You’ve gone through like three bags of chips, isn’t your mouth like hella salty?” He asks her, motioning towards the chips.

She looks over and stares in amazement at all the empty chip bags in front of her. “Holy shit…” she mumbled, clearly not fully present. “I ate all of those?”

“Yeah, now open your mouth.” He grabs her chin and forces her mouth open despite her protests, placing the bottle up to her lips and tipping it slightly so it doesn’t all flow out. She drinks and he watches with an inexplicable expression on his face. He couldn’t believe that people like her still existed in the world, somehow so pure yet the slightest bit tainted. She was hopeful for a better world but not delusional, she was detached from the world he lived in yet kept an open mind and wanted to know more about it, and she was beautiful. Not just in a physical sense, but beautiful in the way she spoke. Gorgeous in the way she laughed and alluring in the way she presented herself.

He slowly moved the bottle away from her lips and watched as she wiped her mouth, his eyes flickering down to her lips and staying there for a few seconds. They always looked so inviting.

“Y’know, Clyde,” she began speaking and he looked away from her lips and up into her eyes. “I always thought you were really cool,” she huffed out, laying her head down on his lap. He tensed and looked down, his breathing growing shallow. There was a large pause in between her sentences. She closed her eyes and Clyde could only stare in silence. He hesitantly reached his hand down to her hair, hovering above it to see if she was okay with him touching her head. She didn’t make any indication for him to move, so he began to gently comb his fingers through her hair. The two sat like that for a while before Y/N continued her point from earlier.

“You are really cool…” she lifted herself off his lap and instead moved closer to him, their bodies inches away. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know what she was trying to do.

She glanced down at his lips and Clyde subconsciously licked them. She moved even closer.

“I think I like you.”

That confession alone was enough to make him stop breathing for a couple of seconds. Sure, there had been a couple of signs out there that seemed to hint towards her having an attraction to him. That was all it was though. An attraction. He’d always been doubtful of the idea of her ever gaining any actual feelings for him, he was far too damaged to be hers. He’d only ever entertained the idea of them being together at night when he was up late at night and needed something to soothe him to sleep. So to hear her say something like that, he just couldn’t believe it. She was high. It had to be because of that. He refused to believe any other reason.

She began to lean in and Clyde could feel the overwhelming urge to allow her to kiss him wash over him. He couldn’t allow that to happen, however. Not while she was not in the right state of mind. He put a hand on her shoulder and stopped her movements, making her furrow her eyebrows and pout at him. The sight alone was testing him.

“C’mon. You’re high, you don’t know what you’re saying,” he mumbled, watching as her pout developed into a frown.

“What? But I thought-”

“Just go to sleep or something, I don’t know Y/N,” he sighed out, running a hand through his hair. Y/N shrugged and laid her head back down on his lap, yawning and closing her eyes. He couldn’t bring himself to look down, knowing that if he did, he’d regret not kissing her.

—-------------

Things were tense after that. He drove her home after ensuring she was fairly sober, making sure she left after ingesting a fair amount of fast food. He could still see the wide smile that plastered itself onto her face when he presented her with an extra large cup of soda. That night he didn't sleep, though that was fairly common for him. This time, however, he refused to lull himself to sleep with daydreams of them together, afraid that he’d get overwhelmed. They didn’t see each other for another week after that, which after spending almost the entire month together, obviously aroused suspicion from Y/N. She couldn’t recall much of what happened that day, knowing that she got high and did go on a tangent about baby whales, though everything else was a blur. She first assured Clyde was busy. After all, he had been acting semi-normal when he bought her food and dropped her off, and a day later the two talked on the phone for about ten minutes. But then he changed. He texted her less and when he did text her, it was fairly short replies with no warmth or jokes like usual. She’d begun to get the feeling that she did something wrong but had no idea what it was.

After two days with no contact on the phone, she grew extremely worried. Not only for his sake but also for their relationship. Did she say- or do- something while high? She decided that night she was going to check on him.

After sneaking out and lying to her parents about what she was doing for a little over a month, she began to grow increasingly good at deceiving them. Of course, it never felt good, and she found herself actually praying for forgiveness some nights, though she was far too addicted to the rush she got from doing so to ever stop. That night, like most, she kissed her parents goodnight and waited until around 10 p.m. to sneak out. She didn’t bother texting Clyde to let him know she was visiting, not wanting to risk him running away to avoid her.

When she arrived at the building he usually stayed at, she went straight to his usual spot, though was unable to find him. She frowned. It wasn’t uncommon for him to be out at night, the issue was he had more than just one or two spots he went to hang out, and she really didn’t feel like walking around the streets of Las Vegas at night in search of him. She decided to suck it up, though, knowing that her relationship -or lack thereof- with Clyde was more important than preserving her energy.

She stopped by Johnny’s room to see if he was there, pushing the door open slightly and clearing her throat over the loud video game sound effects and music coming from his T.V. making him glance over and nod in her direction.

“Yo,” he spoke absentmindedly, his fingers harshly clicking the buttons of the video game controller in his hands. Y/N smiled at him though he wasn’t paying attention.

“Have you seen Clyde?” she asked, her hand gripping onto the door.

Johnny takes a second to answer, his eyebrows furrowing though Y/N can’t tell if it’s because he’s too focused on the game or if it’s because he’s actually trying to think of when the last time he saw Clyde was. Y/N raises her eyebrows expectantly, and Johnny pauses his game and looks at her. “He went to the park with Snow, said he needed to clear his mind or something,” he says while scratching his head. Y/N can tell he wants to say more and stays in her place by the door.

He continues. “Not that it’s any of my business but uh…did you and Clyde get into some argument or something? I didn’t wanna eavesdrop but when they were leaving I heard her mention something about girls and then your name and…well I don’t know I just haven’t seen you around this week so I just assumed.” He shrugged and leaned over to grab a beer bottle on a tiny wooden table, chugging the liquid down. Y/N smiled. She remembered her first impression of him wasn’t the best, thinking he was a bit of a dick and standoffish, though he eventually came around. She sighed and patted the side of the door, getting ready to make her departure.

“Ya know Johnny that is a GREAT question. I’m about to go find out,” she replied simply before waving goodbye and rushing off. Johnny stared after her and shrugged before returning to his video game.

Y/N wasn’t too worried about Clyde hanging out with Snow this late at night alone. She’d interacted with Snow several amount of times before and she was a very sweet girl, although a bit ditzy whenever she was intoxicated (which was a little too often.) She gave Y/N a safe space to talk about being a girl and made it obvious that Clyde was her friend and nothing more. She of course became aware of Y/N’s feelings for Clyde before Y/n herself was even aware of them, and took any chance she got to push the two together. Overall she was the cute blonde girl who at first glance looked like a mean girl but would actually end up being your best friend.

What concerned her was the fact that her name was mentioned in their conversation, meaning Clyde was talking about her despite not reaching out to her at all. She had to have done something wrong. As she walked towards the local park she did nothing but think through the countless number of possible ways she could have fucked up. She had eight minutes to think through exactly what she was going to say when she saw him. Was she going to be angry? Demand why he didn’t talk to her for days? Or maybe she’d take a softer approach.

Eight minutes was not enough time to make any decision. By the time she got to the park, she was less than ready, staring at the figures sitting on a bench a few feet away. She could easily tell it was Clyde and Snow based on the shape of his hair, and she felt her palms get clammy as she walked towards them. Clearly, she didn’t think that through.

“Clyde.” Was all she said as she approached the two. They both turned, though Clyde was a lot quicker, and Snow smiled widely when she saw Y/N.

“See, what’d I say,” she whispered over to Clyde, patting his shoulder before getting up and smiling warmly at her friend. Y/N couldn’t be upset with her, she was far too cute, so she smiled back. Snow leaned in and gave Y/N a quick hug, patting her back before walking away without another word. It was silent after that.

Clyde turned back around and stared down at the ground, Y/N walking to the front of the bench and sitting down next to him. She left little room for him to run away. Whatever it was, they were going to confront it tonight. Y/N was the first to speak after gathering her thoughts.

“Did I do something wrong?” She asked, her voice breaking. She didn’t intend to get emotional so early in the conversation but she couldn’t help it. Aside from the fact that she harbored feelings for him, his friendship meant a lot to her. He was the first friend she’d made who she felt completely comfortable around. He introduced her to a whole new world that she didn’t know existed, and she knew that world meant nothing without him. He was ingrained into her.

Clyde looked up quickly and stared at her, his eyes wide and bloodshot. When she turned to look at him she couldn’t help but feel pity. He’d obviously been lacking sleep. “Jesus Clyde, what’s happened?” She asked, leaning in and cupping his face in her hands. He twitched underneath her touch but said nothing. Y/N inspected his face for a sign, anything that would tell her what was wrong, but she found nothing. That was until she looked into his eyes.

She couldn’t tell what it was, but the intensity of his eyes made it so that she couldn’t look away even if she wanted to. She didn’t need to hear any words to understand that he was in some weird internal battle with himself.

“You told me you liked me.” Clyde finally breaks his silence. His voice was so quiet, she could almost barely hear it. She’d never heard him so vulnerable before.

“What?”

“When you were high you told me you liked me and tried to kiss me.” Y/N was at a loss for words. She should have known she’d say something so stupid in a moment of vulnerability. She let go of his face and opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out, so Clyde continued. “I can’t be with you, Y/N. And if I can’t be with you then I don’t know what else to do with myself.”

She was confused now. What did he mean by ‘he couldn’t be with her?’ Was that because he didn’t feel the same way? Then why add that last part? She searched for the words in her brain though all that could come out was a weak “What?”

“Y/N,” he breathed in and looked away, as if he felt guilty, “I like you. But I can’t let myself ruin you.”

She should have felt overjoyed. She just got confirmation that her crush liked her back, this should have been a happy moment, but instead, she just felt nauseous. The pit in her stomach that had been lingering there for about a week was intensifying.

“What the fuck does that even mean?” She spat out. Ruin her? How could he ever ruin her? “Clyde, I don’t know what you’re talking about and to be honest, I don’t care. You couldn’t ever ruin me-“

“Y/N, you’re Christian.” Y/N stared in disbelief, ready to ridicule him for bringing up such an irrelevant fact before he continued. “You’re Christian and you’re- you’re fucking amazing. You’re like a rainbow at the end of a storm, and I know that it’s fucking cliché and corny, and you can make fun of me all you want, but I don’t know how else to describe it. You don’t smoke, you don’t drink, and you hadn’t had a soda in years before I bought you one for fucks sake! You’re in your own sweet, innocent little world, and I took you away from that. I don’t wanna take you away from more.”

His confession left her speechless. She understood what he was trying to say, having had the same thoughts before. They WERE different, though she didn’t have to carry the burden of thinking she was ‘tainting’ him the way he did with her. He was the opposite of everything her parents wanted for her. Disobeyed his parents, he smoked and occasionally drank, he definitely didn’t hold any religious beliefs that they would agree with, and the list went on longer than she’d like it to.

She looked down at her hands which rested on top of her knees. She’d hate to admit he was right. They both sat in silence for a while, seemingly contemplating what they should do. She felt weird. As if he was somehow misconstructing the truth. She didn’t doubt that he felt bad about changing her, though something was telling her that wasn’t the full story. If he really did feel so bad, why did he let her keep hanging around him? Why not cut contact earlier? He was leaving something out.

“Tell me the truth, Clyde,” she sighed out. Clyde frowned and turned to look at her.

“That is the truth.”

“No, it’s not. I don’t know if you’re lying to me or something but there’s no way the only reason is cause you feel guilty.” Clyde bit the inside of his cheek.

“I’m not good for you,” he began and Y/N rolled her eyes, sitting back on the bench and crossing her arms. He ignored her and continued, “I’m a dumbass, Y/N. I don’t think you understand just how-“ he sighs, exasperated. “I can’t give you anything. I don’t have a lot of money to fucking buy you jewelry like some other guy can, shit I don’t even have like a real home to live in! Shit, dude, I’m like…the worst guy you could date.”

Y/N couldn’t help but laugh. Clyde was obviously confused by her random change in mood, though Y/N couldn’t stop herself. As she threw her head back her laughter died down to just giggles. “So this is all about you not being good enough for me?” She turned towards him.

He sniffled, wiping his face with the sleeve of his jacket and avoiding her gaze.”So what? You think it’s fucking stupid?” He asks, laughing a bit to mask his hurt. She wordlessly grabbed his hands and removed them from his face, forcing him to maintain eye contact. Cupping his cheeks once again, she wipes away the few stray tears that managed to fall and smiles at him. Without warning, she leans in and kisses him.

The kiss is soft as if she were worried about breaking him, and Clyde has no idea how to respond. He keeps his hands by his side and closes his eyes, relishing the feeling of her lips against his. He knows his are cracked and probably dry but she doesn’t care. As he goes to lift his hands to grab her face, she pulls away, confusing him. He finds it adorable how her face is obviously flushed despite being the one to initiate the kiss.

“Clyde, I don’t give a damn if you don’t have any money,” she breaks the silence. He says nothing and just continues to admire her. “I don’t care if you don’t have a proper home, or proper parents, or a proper attitude. I like you because you’re fun. You’re fun and you’re sweet and you’ve shown me that life doesn’t have to be lived by the rules only. And holy shit did my life suck before I met you.” Clyde laughs quietly.

She presses her forehead against his and he shuts his eyes, smiling. It was pure silence around the two and if they focused hard enough, it felt like they were the only two in the world.

————————-

Two months pass by without an issue. Y/N continues to visit Clyde in secret and once in a while he stops by her house, but only when her parents are asleep. The two share a few kisses in her dark room, talk about whatever came up, kiss some more until he eventually wound up on top of her, and then say goodbye. He promised her that he’d never pressure her into doing anything she wasn’t ready for, and though she trusted him with her entire life, she knew she wasn’t ready to take a step like that.

It was a rainy Saturday night when Y/N made her first mistake.

The two were hanging out in Clyde’s room, Johnny, Snow, and Lola joining them. The other three were obviously intoxicated and trying to play a game of Monopoly while Clyde and Y/N sat in the corner of the room, Y/N’s legs over Johnny’s lap while he drew something in his notebook. Y/N painted her nails with a dark purple polish Lola let her borrow.

“What are you drawing?” She asked, leaning forward a bit to try and get a glimpse. Clyde smirked and pushed back, swatting her hands away as well.

“Mind your business,” he laughed. Y/N rolled her eyes and set the polish aside, removing her legs from his lap. Clyde looked away from his drawing to stare at her questioningly before she maneuvered herself to sit next to him. He shut his notebook and threw it to the side, wrapping an arm around her as she put her head on his shoulder. They watched the other three argue about fake money and properties.

“Man fuck you, Lola! That was supposed to be my station??” Johnny spat out while Lola laughed and flipped him off.

“Yes? Well, it’s mine now. Too bad,” she hummed happily, flipping her brown hair over her shoulder as Snow passed her a large bottle of alcohol.

“Hope your ass lands in prison…” he grumbled, making Clyde snicker under his breath. Y/N smirked and reached out to grab Clyde’s hand, subconsciously playing with his fingers. He looked down at their hands and then at her.

“Ready to go home?” He asked. She hummed in thought and glanced over at a clock nearby.

“In like…five minutes. I’ve got church tomorrow morning so I gotta be up early,” she whined and threw her head back, Clyde raising his hand so that the back of her head didn’t hit the wall. Snow, who apparently has been watching them and listening in on their conversation, sucks her teeth.

“Why don’t you just tell them you don’t wanna go?” She asks, laying down. Clyde rolled his eyes and scoffed.

“Yeah, bright idea, she’ll just tell her vehemently Christian parents that she doesn’t want to go church. That definitely won’t be suspicious,” he remarks. Y/N glares at him.

“Don’t be a dick, Clyde,” she whispers. Looking over at Snow, she smiles softly. “He’s got a point though. They’ll get all weird and assume I’m doing something behind their backs which… I am but…” she shrugs.

Snow passes over another bottle of alcohol to Clyde which he declines. “Gotta drive her home,” he mumbles as an excuse. Johnny laughs.

“Look at you being a good little boyfriend,” he teases and Clyde side-eyes him. He gets up, extending his hand out for Y/N to take, and helping her get up when she does. He then walks over to Johnny, smacking him on the back of the head while simultaneously grabbing his keys from the table nearby.

“It’s called making sure we don’t fucking die on the road.” He scoffed. Y/N bent over to hug Snow and Lola before ruffling Johnny’s hair, waving goodbye to everyone as they walked towards the door.

“See you guys later!” She exclaimed while following Clyde out of the room. They walked down the hallway in comfortable silence until they went down the stairs and reached the front doors. It was pouring rain outside and Y/N grimaced at the idea of getting soaked. Clyde sighed and searched around for an umbrella he could borrow, but he came to no luck. He then shrugs off his jacket and hands it to Y/N who smiles gratefully in response. She puts it on and puts the hood over her head to protect her hair, and the two interlock hands before counting down to three.

“Ready? One, two, three-!” Clyde counted out, gripping her hand tightly as they ran out into the pouring rain, giggling as they crossed the street to where his van was parked. Clyde hurries to unlock the doors, Y/N laughing at how his hair was sticking to his face. They rushed inside and drove off. Clyde drops her off a couple of streets away from her house just in case anyone were to see her, they wouldn’t see her being dropped off by a rusty van.

As the vehicle comes to a stop, Clyde turns to face her but she quickly smashes her lips against his. His hands immediately go to cup her face, and she runs a hand through his hair as their kiss grows rougher. He pulls away first after a couple of seconds, breathing heavily and laughing.

“You gotta go-” he’s interrupted by her kissing him again. He makes a small “hmph” sound as their lips touch, and this time she tries to pull him closer by his collar. His hand travels down her face to her neck and he wraps his fingers around her neck loosely. She whines against his lips and he has to remind himself that they are inside his van in the middle of a Christian neighborhood. This time Y/N pulls away, giggling as she gives him one last kiss on the cheek before opening the door and rushing out, shouting out a quick goodbye and thank you.

Clyde doesn’t even have time to utter a response as she’s gone by the time he really comes to his senses. He shakes his head while laughing and drives off.

—--------------------

Y/N is asleep for longer than she should have been, seemingly sleeping through her alarms and her mothers shouts for her to get up. She barges in through the door, obviously annoyed, and huffs out another “Get up”, yanking the blankets off of Y/N. Y/N groans and turns over, shielding her face from the sun shining through her windows.

“Get up, Y/N! What has gotten into you? Do you not remember we have service this morning? You have twenty minutes to get ready, hurry. Since you seem to be incapable of getting up on your own I’ll have to pick your dress for you as well, since you want to be a child.” Y/N can barely understand her mother, still too groggy to even respond. She sits up on her bed and rubs her eyes, yawning, and stretches her arms in the air, as her mother goes through her closet in search of something she can wear to Church. She mutters to herself, commenting about each dress she sees as she frantically goes through her closet before going awfully silent for a few seconds. Y/N takes notice of this and furrows her eyebrows, scooting towards the front of her bed.

“Mom? What’s wrong-?” She herself goes quiet when her mother pulls out Clyde’s jacket that was stashed in the back of the closet and holds it up for her to see. Suddenly the atmosphere of the room is tense, and Y/N feels as though she can’t breathe. She watches as her mother wrinkles her nose at the smell, holding the jacket up by her fingertips. It’s already very apparent that it’s a males jacket, though Y/N’s plan on lying and telling her mother it’s a jacket one of her friends let her borrow from Church immediately goes to shit when her mother scoffs.

“This smells like rain and cologne…Y/N where did you get this? And why is it wet? You didn’t leave the house yesterday.” Y/N can feel her throat closing in. The room feels as though it’s closing in on her as she and her mother lock eyes in a silent battle, one that Y/N is losing horribly. This tension is luckily diffused the moment her father calls out to her mother, and she turns to look towards the door. She glances back at Y/N once again and then leaves the room in a hurry, the jacket in her hands. Y/N watches her leave in silence before groaning and covering her face with her hands, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes.

She didn’t know if it was some sick joke or if the universe was just against her, but that day’s sermon was about disobeying one's parents and straying from the word of God.

—--------------------

The jacket incident wasn’t brought up again. She didn’t understand if her mother just forgot about it or decided that it wasn’t worth arguing over, either way, Y/N was glad. She called Clyde the next day when her parents were out of the house and told him what happened, telling him that she’d take a break from sneaking out and visiting him. She couldn’t risk raising suspicion on her. Clyde was obviously upset though understood that she was just taking necessary precautions and told her to stay safe and let him know if she ever needed any help. For the remainder of the week, she didn’t call or text him and made sure to be on her best behavior. This, of course, did not go unnoticed by her mother.

After a couple more days, Y’N assumed she was sort of in the clear to at least contact him again. She texted him an update and asked how he and the others were doing, leading to him sending her an onslaught of messages complaining about how he missed her and “couldn’t stand dealing with the others without her around.” She then reminded him he was friends with them way before he met her, and he just ignored her and asked when he’d see her again.

CLYDE

Y/N: i’m scared, don’t want her 2 notice anything weird

CLYDE: It’ll be fine, it’s been days hasn’t it?

Y/N: yeah but…

CLYDE: Just come over for like a hour or two.

The others wanna see you too.

Y/N sighs. She can’t deny his offer, no matter how many warning signs are going off in her head. She missed him, she missed being around him, she missed his lips, and she missed her friends. Just an hour or two wouldn’t hurt, right? She types back.

Y/N: fine, but just for two hours and then i gotta be right back home.

CLYDE: Awesome. I’ll pick you up at 11.

—--------------------

That was her second mistake.

Surprisingly enough, it wasn’t the actual act of sneaking out that got her caught. No, it was the fact that her mother got the inkling to just check her phone the next morning while she slept. She should have known something was going to go wrong considering how smoothly the night before went. She did her usual routine of kissing her parents goodnight, waiting till they slept, and sneaking out of the house at exactly 11 on the dot. The moment she stepped foot out of her house she ran towards the street he usually dropped her off at and sure enough his van was parked.

She ran inside and almost immediately after settling herself down on her seat, Clyde smashed his lips against hers. It took her by surprise though she had no issue with it and leaned into the kiss, placing a hand on his shoulder. The kiss was rougher and noisier than any of their previous ones, with their lips making a smacking sound every time they moved. They eventually pulled away when Clyde’s hand slipped around the back of her neck, and they took a minute to catch their breath.

“Good to see you too,” she joked, giggling as she wiped her mouth, Clyde only nodded and laughed breathlessly, turning on the engine and driving off. They didn’t do much that night, simply going to his room and making up for lost time (this of course included talking about their days while interrupting each other with kisses that led to her being on his lap and leaving one or two bruises on his neck). Eventually, Snow and Johnny stopped by. Snow was probably more ecstatic to see her than everyone else, having almost crushed her with a hug that lasted exactly two minutes, and the four played games and talked about what she’d missed.

Clyde drove her home two hours later, as promised, and the two departed with yet another passionate kiss. They agreed to meet again the following night at the same time, feeling as if only one night a week wasn’t enough. When she got back home everything was as it should be. Everyone was in bed and her pillows were still placed in the exact positions she had arranged them to be under her blanket. She was happy and secure when she went to bed, which is exactly why she panicked the next morning when she couldn’t find her phone.

She’d searched everywhere, her entire room turned upside down as she tried desperately to find her phone. It wasn’t underneath her pillow where she put it before she went to sleep, it wasn’t in any of her drawers or on top of her dresser or bedside table, and it wasn’t in her closet. It wasn’t under her bed or in her jewelry boxes, and as she continued to search, that unmistakable feeling of dread settled upon her. She knew she took it with her up to her room, she specifically remembers policing it underneath her pillow before falling asleep, so why couldn’t she find it? There was only one answer and the thought alone made her nauseous.

She couldn’t bring herself to go downstairs. She knew she had to eventually, but a part of her wanted to stay locked inside her room until she died. She might as well die now in peace, seeing as the moment she walks down those stairs, she is sealing her fate. Was her room always this stuffy? Why did it feel so dark? It was only ten in the morning. Y/N took a moment to sit down on her bed and try to catch her breath. It was no use, however, and she could feel herself hyperventilating. She’d done so much over the past couple of months and she’d gotten so used to going unnoticed that the prospect of getting caught wasn’t really in her mind much at all anymore. Clearly, she had gotten too cocky.

She knew she had to go downstairs. There was no use in prolonging the inevitable. As she made her way out of her room -extremely slowly-, she took notice of just how quiet it was. Her house was never a noisy one, seeing as it was just the three of them, though she added context of her parents waiting for her downstairs to confront her seemed to emphasize the silence. She trudged down the stairs, feeling lightheaded. She had to grip onto the railing tighter than usual to ensure she wouldn’t fall. Her footsteps were too loud. The lights were too bright. Somehow everything that she encountered every day overwhelmed her. As she approached the dining room she felt her mouth go dry.

There both her father and mother sat in chairs right next to each other, holding hands. They looked glum. Y/N’s eyes drifted towards the objects on the table in front of them. Sure enough, it was her phone and Clyde’s jacket. She was beyond fucked and there was absolutely no way out of this. She didn’t even bother moving towards them, instead staying frozen in her place. She couldn’t move even if she wanted to. She was quite literally paralyzed by fear.

“Take a seat.” Her father never had a ‘warm’ tone to his voice, yet she’d never heard him be so cold and demanding. When she looked over at her mother she took note of how she refused to make eye contact with her. She was always the softer of the two. Y/N refused to take pity on her, however. She was the one who brought this situation to life. Despite that small little voice in her head telling her not to, Y/N walked towards the table and took a seat in front of the two, her face stoic. If she was going to go through this, she needed to seem as unbothered as possible.

“Do you understand what you have done?” Her father didn’t wait to begin berating her. Y/N continued to stay silent, her eyes fixated on Clyde’s jacket. Oddly enough the sight alone gave her a sense of comfort, knowing that it belonged to the boy who was there to support her no matter what and always keep her safe. This of course didn’t apply to the current situation. Only God knew what was about to happen to her.

“You’ve completely broken any ounce of trust your mother and I have spent years building up. We have not raised you this way.” Somehow the lack of yelling and anger in his voice made this all the more terrifying. He was angry, his words didn’t conceal that at all, and when she looked up into his eyes, she couldn’t help but feel like she’d dug her own grave. They were washed over with this darkness that she couldn’t explain. She felt disgusted to be on the receiving end of his stare. “No daughter of mine will behave this way.”

She didn’t know what came over her. Perhaps she was momentarily possessed by some spirit that was like her outspoken alter-ego, or maybe she just had gone insane after months of being riddled with this guilt for disobeying her parents, but she opened her mouth to speak without any second thought. “What way?”

Her father scoffed and her mother pleaded with her through her gaze to take back what she said. While she certainly wasn’t intending to say that, now that it had left her mouth she needed to own up to it. She didn’t falter under her father's strict gaze. Her mother was the one to speak up.

“What he means is-”

“Quiet.” Her father is quick to shut her down. She shuts up. “You’re whoring yourself out to some stranger boy on the streets? Is that seriously how you intend to live your life? Do you not feel ashamed? Dirty?”

Y/N couldn’t believe what she’d just heard. She knew her father wouldn’t be happy, she wasn;t expecting him to throw rose petals and give her his blessing, but to go as far as accusing his onw daughter of being a whore? She couldn’t stop the tears that welled up in her eyes, though the rest of her face maintained neutral.

“Well? Speak!” He raised his voice for the first time and Y/N flinched. What was she supposed to say? Admit to his demeaning allegations?

“If you want me to call myself a whore then you might as well just leave now because you’re not getting a single confession from me.”

She definitely pissed him off with that one. He clenched his jaw and looked off to the side, taking in a deep breath as he tried to compose himself. He grabbed her phone and held it up so she could see, making her frown.

“You will never contact that boy again. Do you understand?”

Y/N would be stupid to assume this was the end. She nodded along to his words however to appease him. He stayed silent and hardened his gaze, making her realize he wanted a verbal response.

“Yes sir.”

He laughed. “I don’t think you understand. But you will soon.”

Before she could question what he meant he took her phone and threw it across the dining room, the impact making a loud noise as it hit the wall and fell to the floor. Both Y/N and her mother visibly flinched at the noise, and for the first time, she was genuinely afraid of something happening to her physically. Her father stood up and walked out of the room, not bothering to give her one last glance. She stared down at the table, her tears falling freely at this point. Her mother offered out her hand, though Y/N swatted it away and got up and stormed off as well.

—---------------

Clyde knew something was wrong when she didn’t show up at that night. He didn’t know what happened or why, but he was concerned. There wasn’t anything he could do, however, seeing as he couldn’t just walk up to her front door and knock and ask why she flaked out. He tried his best not to let his mind wander and assumed she’d just fallen asleep earlier. Or at least that’s what he tried to tell himself until the next day when he didn’t hear from her at all.

Now things were getting concerning. If she really had fallen asleep, she’d just text or call him and apologize. Her lack of contact made him wonder if something did happen to her and if something did happen, what could he do? He left her two text messages that day, both asking if she was alright. He decided to just wait, one wrong move and he’d be getting her in a world of trouble. His messages were never returned.

Another day went by without contact and though he didn’t show it outwardly, he was absolutely freaking the fuck out. It was unusual for her to go radio silent with absolutely zero warning, and after not showing up the other night, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander. What if she’d gotten caught? What was he supposed to do? Go to her house and demand she give him an explanation? Threaten to fight her parents? Throw rocks at her window to get her attention and then convince her to leave her home and run away with him?

Being the romantic that he was, he naturally chose the last option. He drove to her house the next day at around 12 am, stopping his van a few streets away like he normally would in case anyone was nosy enough to even look at the front of her house. He walked in the cold night with a pocket full of tiny pebbles, mentally going through what he was going to say to her. He knew that despite her feelings for him, she loved and respected her parents, so it wouldn’t be easy to convince her to leave. That and he knew how rough life was when you didn’t have the support of a parent or loved one to fall back on. He was okay living like that but he didn’t want that to be her reality as well. She deserved better than that, even if it was a couple of assholes with old fashion traditions.

Once he arrived at her window he threw the first pebble, getting no response. That’s fine, she probably didn’t hear it. He threw another one and again: no response. He threw another one, and another one, and eventually, he’d thrown every pebble in his pocket. Making a mental note to carry more the next time, he debated yelling out her name though decided against it. He couldn’t risk her parents hearing him. He walked away, dejected and ready to return the next day to try again.

He decided to take his chances and call her again the next day, just in case she was asleep the night before and just didn’t hear him. He knew the call was going through but didn’t understand why she wasn’t picking up, and to be quite honest, it was starting to piss him off. His anger wasn’t directed towards her of course, no, he was mad at her parents. Why couldn’t they just let her be happy? When his call went to voicemail he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Leave a message after the beep,” the robotic voice spoke and Clyde had to suppress everything in him that was telling him to just throw his phone at the wall. After hearing the beep he shook his head and looked around his room.

“Hey, Y/N. I don’t know what the fuck happened -I mean I have an idea but- I need you to call me back okay? I don’t care if it’s to tell me that you can’t see me anymore, I don’t care if it’s your stupid fucking parents telling me I’m a piece of shit who isn’t good enough for their daughter, I really don’t give a shit. I just want to know you’re okay. Call me back when you get this. Bye.”

—-----------------

She did NOT in fact call him back. He visited her house again the next night and brough two pockets full of pebbles, taking his sweet time throwing them at her window just like the other night. Still, no answer. He could have sworn he’d seen her light flash off when he was approaching her window though he wasn’t sure if he was just going crazy. He was getting frustrated. How else was he supposed to feel? When he got back to his room that night, he completely ignored Snow and Lola who tried to cheer him up with some alcohol and instead went straight to bed, though he of course didn’t sleep at all that night.

The next day he called her again. The call went to voicemail again, and he cursed at the stupidity of leaving a message she probably wasn’t going to hear or respond to. Yet he still left one.

“Hey, uhm I don’t know what is going on over there but you need to call me back dude. This isn’t fucking funny okay?” His voice was sounding uncharacteristically desperate. He needed to remind himself that it wasn’t that serious. Or at least that’s what he needed to believe to keep himself calm. “Call me and tell your parents to go fuck themselves while you’re at it, okay? Stay safe, bye.”

—-----------------

He knew she wasn’t going to be responding to any of his phone calls, yet for every day that passed by, he left a new one.

“I don’t know what to do, Y/N. It’s not like I can just show uo to your fuckin’ house and, like, demand your parents to let you see me. I mean, I could but, what the fuck is that gonna do? Come on Y/N just…fuck.”

—--------------

“At least I know you’re not playing some stupid fucking prank on me now. There’s no way you’d be able to keep it going this far. I don’t even know if you’re listening to these. Or your parents. Is anyone fucking there? Are they doing some weird punishment thing where they force you to listen to each of these messages and fucking laugh at me or something? That’d be fucked up. Call me back sometime in the near future. Preferably before I die.”

—-------------

“Snow is on my ass right now because of you, did you know that? She’s pissed at me. Thinks I’m not doing enough to see you. I don’t know what the fuck she wants me to but she’s been complaining about how she misses you. Everyone’s kinda on edge right now. Would be really cool if you’d, I don’t know, pop up out of nowhere. We miss you.”

—-----------

“Y’know I look like a dumbass making all these phone calls and leaving all these fucking voicemails knowing they aren’t going to anyone. There’s a part of me that wishes you’d just pick up randomly and we’d just talk normally as if nothing happened… that’s so stupid what the fuck am I saying? Fucking corny….I gotta go. Miss you.”

—----------

“Uhm. I know I was always awkward about it in person and shit but… I really like you, you know? I hope you do. Even if I’m not there to say it. Just…remember that for me okay? I like you. I trust you. To me, that means a lot more than love. But I do love you. I hate saying it cause it’s fucking stupid and you can’t count on anyone ever so what’s the point of saying it, yknow? And maybe it’s stupid to even think I love you because we really only knew each other for a couple of months but…whatever. Bye.”

—----------

“So what? You’re gonna give up on her? That’s your fucking GIRLFRIEND, Clyde.” Snow smacked the side of Clyde’s head making him groan and divert his eyes from her. He wasn’t giving up, or at least he refused to look at it that way. He’d decided to give up calling. He refused to be held captive by the idea, the fantasy, of her coming back and answering the phone one day. He lifted the blunt to his lips and took a deep breath in, trying his best to ignore her scolding.

“Clyde what if something seriously bad happened at her place? Think about her point of view, for fucks sake. Stop feeling bad for yourself and maybe think about how bad this is is for HER. She has to live in a house with those people.” Clyde would never admit Snow had a point. He refused to ever give her the satisfaction of being right, though he’d be stupid to ignore her words and continue wallowing in his self pity. He let her say her peace and without a word handed her the blunt, getting up and grabbing his keys, before walking out the door. She called out to him though he wasn’t listening.

—-------------

Y/N was beyond fucked. She’d spent the past 12 days in isolation in their guest room, only allowed to leave to use the bathroom. She was no longer allowed to eat with her parents at the dinner table, though she didn’t complain, grateful that she didn’t have to see the pathetic excuse of a man she had to call her father. It was lonely, being stuck in her room with no other way out. She knew her phone had survived being thrown by her father though her mother told her he’d confiscated it and planned on never returning it. She didn’t care anymore. Speaking of her mother, she refused to speak with her. She didn’t give a damn if she was more compassionate than her father. She’d shown him the messages and she’d presented the jacket to him, so her predicament was just as much her mothers fault as it was her fathers.

She couldn’t begin to explain how lonely she felt. This wasn’t living. She never knew what living was until she met Clyde. He’d taught her that life was more than just Sunday morning Church services, bible verses to abide by, doing chores around the house, going to school, and sleeping. There was going out at night and meeting new people, listening to music that actually spoke to your soul instead of reiterating tired biblical lessons, eating the foods that actually made you happy and crave for more, and loving so hard that you’d rather spend your entire life in isolation with that other person than breathe without them. Y/N knew that without Clyde, she wasn’t herself, not because she depended on him to live, but because he ingrained himself into her.

She had a roof over her head, she had food and water and she had clothes, but she had no real substance to her life. And she’d rather be disowned by her family for the rest of her life than continue to live this way.

—----------------

Smoking just wasn’t cutting it out for Clyde at the moment. He’d driven off to a park pretty far from where he lived so he wouldn’t encounter anyone he knew. He needed time to himself. Standing outside his van, he rested against it and crossed his arms while smoking a cigarette, ignoring the ‘NO SMOKING’ sign just a few inches away from him. He wasn’t known for his ability to abide by rules. Snow’s words replayed in his mind constantly. She was annoying. She was annoying, and persistent, but she was right. Hitting the back of his head on his van, he threw his cigarette down on the ground and stepped on it.

“Godamnit…” he sighed out and ran a hand through his hair. He paced. Was he really going to just let her stay in that toxic environment? Who’s to say his plan would even work though? He’ll never know unless he tries. But if he does try and fail, it’d be a waste of time.

“Fuck!” He hissed out, smacking his van once, and then twice, before smacking it one final time and backing away. Catching his breath, he backed away and pushed his hair back before getting back in and starting the van.

—--------------

This was not thought out at all, Clyde realizes as he stands in front of her front door. He was either about to get his ass beat or take home the girl of his dreams. Either way, he was shitting his pants. He rang the doorbell and looked down at the ground, muttering under his breath “This is so fucking stupid.”

He could hear footsteps behind the door and straightened his posture, watching the doorknob jiggle before the door swung open. Clyde studied the man in front of him and the man did the same with him, though his eyes narrowed almost immediately.

“You’ve got some nerve showing up here, boy.” The man, who Clyde assumed was her father, snarled at him. Clyde’s face contorted in disgust at his words.

“Jesus, could you sound any more like a weird Southern creep? Sorry, is saying Jesus offensive to you people? I don’t give a shit actually- anyways, ya kind of left me with no choice here but to make sure my girlfriend was still alive…” Clyde rambled, though he knew he was only making his case worse when he saw her father clench his fist in the corner of his eye.

“What are you trying to say? Are you accusing me of murdering my daughter?” Her father scoffed and it took Clyde everything in him to not laugh in his face.

“It was more of a… never mind.” He shook his head. “Just let me talk to her man, I’ll leave you alone after that.”

This time it was her father's turn to laugh, though Clyde remained as stoic as he could possibly be with the anger that was slowly bubbling up inside of him. He could see someone moving around in the background and glanced over, seeing her mother. He raised his eyebrows at her and she quickly scurried away after being noticed. He directed his attention back to the man in front of him.

—---------------

Y/N could hear two voices outside the room and though the other sounded so familiar, she refused to believe it was actually him. There was no way he’d really come for her, and as she lay on her back on the bed provided, she stared up at the ceiling and wondered what would she do if it really were him. Just as she closed her eyes to sleep, the doorknob began to rattle, startling her. There wasn’t reason for anyone to open the door for her at this hour, and she hadn’t asked to use the bathroom.

She sat up straight and stared at the door as it slowly opened, her mother in clear view. Before Y/N could even ask what was happening, she heard the one voice she swore she’d never hear again, and her heart soared. If she was being fully honest, she didn’t care much for her mother doing this final favor for her, though she gave her a grateful smile nonetheless as she jumped up out of the bed and ran out the door. She didn’t hesitate to run straight to the front door, pausing behind her father.

“Listen asshole, you’re really testing my patience here-”

“Watch your language, the lord is watching.”

“Who gives a damn! Just let me see her-” Clyde stopped completely when he saw her step out from behind her father. His eyes widened and her father turned around to see what he was looking at, growing furious at the sight of his daughter who should have been locked away in a room.

“You let her out?” He asked her mother, his voice low and Y/N backed away out of fear. Clyde looked over at her and then back at the man, his breath quickening. Things were about to get ugly fast, and they needed to leave. He motioned over for Y/N to walk over, and as she tried to discreetly make her way toward him while her father was distracted, the older man looked over and grabbed her wrist to prevent her from moving any further. Despite her struggles and protests, he wouldn’t let go, tightening his grip on her. She looked over at Clyde for help and he did the only thing he could think of.

His hand was going to hurt like a bitch after this.

Punching her father square in the jaw, he let go of her and she ran towards Clyde. He groaned and grabbed his jaw, watching as the two fled hand in hand. “Know that you can never come back to this house ever again! No daughter of mine will be another man's slut!” He yelled out to them. They both couldn't be bothered to listen, giggling as they ran, the cold air hitting their faces. Once they were finally out of sight Clyde pulled her in, his hand cupping the back of her neck as the two crashed their lips against one another. Giggling in between kisses they struggled to pull apart, lips stuck in a dance with each other, and that’s how they intended to stay for as long as they lived.

--------------------------

a/n: holy shit this was long. to be honest, i lost a lot of motivation towards the end which is why it isn’t the best, but i really did try my best! i hope you all enjoyed<33

#clyde x reader #electrick children #rory culkin #clyde electrick children #electrick children clyde #clyde x y/n #rory culkin x reader #oneshot

197 notes · View notes

mindswriters · 1 year

Note

pls more toxic rafe 😭

omgg i’m so glad u guys liked it!!! tbh i was kinda scared bout the judgement ☠️☠️

TW: toxic!rafe, curse words, allusions to sex in the end (as u haven’t said anything specific besides toxic rafe, i’m just giving u a random thought from the same universe as the other fic)

Today was your best friend’s bachelorette party, and you were very excited for it. You two have been glued by the hip ever since you can remember what having a friend is, and great hours of your teenage years were spent with you both dreaming about getting married, starting a family and things like that, and even though you and Rafe have moved in together for a couple of months now, you never really did all the cliché rituals of a married couple, so your friend is going to be the first one to achieve that, which is very special to the both of you, especially with you being her 1st bridesmaid. There was no way you would miss this moment. Or so you thought.

“Hi, babe, I’m home” you were getting ready in your bedroom when you heard the front door, and soon enough Rafe’s voice announcing he arrived from work.

“Hi, baby, I’m inside, bedroom!” you made sure to project your voice through the house, so he’d know where to find you.

“Hey- Wow!” he exclaimed when he opened the door and saw you all dressed up, finishing your makeup “You look so good, babe, so gorgeous” he walked over to you, wrapping his arms on your waist from behind and leaning to kiss your face.

“Hmm, thank you, handsome” you laughed turning on your heels to kiss him on the lips “Did you liked it?” you look back to the mirror, checking your outfit again.

“Of course, babe, I loved it” he sat at the end of your bed, unbuttoning the shirt he used at work “So, where are we going?” he asked, and you frowned.

“Baby, we are not going anywhere, I’m going” you chuckled fixing your earrings “Today’s is Liza’s bachelorette party, remember?” you walked over to him.

“What? No, I don’t remember, you haven’t told me anything” Rafe frowned, you felt his tone changing and you knew you’re in for it.

“Yes, I did, baby. She’s been planning it for a long time, I told you this like, two weeks ago?” you shook your head at the rhetorical question, standing cautiously in front of him.

“Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t remember, you could’ve texted me or something. I even called off on Topper, what about dinner now?” he shrugged in disapproval, pursing his lips.

“I made you dinner already, it’s on the microwave, made that mac’n’cheese you always say you like” you smiled sweetly, putting your arms on his shoulders and tilting your head to one side.

“So that’s how you think it works? Just because you make something that I like for dinner you think you’re free to go wherever you want?” he questioned roughly, making you huff and take a step back from him.

“No, baby, that’s not how I think it works. I made you dinner so you wouldn’t have to go out, or spent money with take out, and not because I want a free pass to go out” you clarified minimally rolling your eyes “And come on, it’s her bachelorette party, is important to the both of us” you gave him pleading eyes.

“Why is it so important to you? It’s her marriage anyways” he arched one of his eyebrows.

“Because we’re best friends, Rafe, and we’ve always dreamt about this part of life. I’m her bridesmaid, it’s important for us to be together tonight” you explained ending with a small pout.

“And where is this party happening?” he asked concerned and gave you a bit of hope.

“At the Country Club, Liza rented a private room there” you answered waiting for his reaction.

“Okay. I understand, love” he said simply, words followed by a kind smile.

“Seriously? You’re okay with me going?” you asked incredulously, your tone now almost too excited.

“Sure. But I’m going with you” he said naturally, earning a quick frown of your eyebrows.

“Oh Rafe-“ you laughed at his response, but stopped as soon as you saw him getting up and grabbing a towel from your wardrobe “Wait, what? You’re not being serious right now, are you?” your voice changing from panic.

“I sure am, darling. Why wouldn’t I be?” he stared at you smirking.

“Because it’s a bachelorette party, Rafe. A ladies party, no groom, no husbands and no boyfriends allowed. You can’t go with me” you scoffed with a light chuckle.

“Simple then, if I’m not going, you’re not going” Rafe stated seriously.

“What? This is so stupid!” you couldn’t help raising your voice a bit from anger “It’s just a group of girls going out to celebrate the last weekend of one of them being single. Just like the boys do. We’re just gonna eat, have some drinks, laugh together, it’s not a big deal!” you tried to convince him.

“Not a big deal, huh? Have you ever went to a bachelorette party? Do you know what the fuck happens in those kinds of celebrations?” he raised his strong voice, taking steps closer to you and pointing to your face, to make you let your guard down “It’s ridiculous, Y/n! I don’t know who else is invited, if they’re single or not, but I’m not the type of man to let my girl go to a party where the purpose is literally to be single for one night. I'm sure you won't just drink and laugh, things like this always involve stupid pranks, and even rent boys. And I don’t care if you’re going to be in a private room, the biggest audience at the Country Club are men, and I don't want my girlfriend walking around there, let alone without me and wearing a tight little skirt like this one. So if you don’t want me to go, you better join me for dinner here, at our home, because you are also not going” he spitted his lost of temper on you.

“Oh my fucking God, Rafe, you’re being so ridiculous right now” you sighed, almost running your hand through your face, but when you remembered it would mess up your make up, you moved it to you hair instead “You go out with your friends practically every once in a week! While I stay here to have dinner all by myself, sometimes I even get to bed alone because I get tired of waiting for you. And now I can’t go to my best friend’s pre-wedding party, which is something that won’t happen ever again, all because you’re jealous? This is bullshit, you have to trust me more, Rafe” you roll your eyes, turning your back to him.

“When did I said that I don’t trust you, babe? Of course I do, I don’t trust the others. And I’m not jealous, I’m just taking care of what’s mine” he came closer again, gently grabbing the back of your arm to bring you to face him.

“Rafe, please, it’s just this time. I never go out with my girl friends alone, and you know them, they’re not just some batshit bitches I met yesterday, we’ve been friends for years now. Plus, all of this ‘marriage rituals’ are something important to me and Liza, we’ve dreamed about this since we were kids, she’ll be so upset if I don’t show up, baby” you pleaded looking up at your boyfriend, praying he’d feel some empathy for your best friend.

“Then call her and say that you’re only going if your boyfriend can go too” he slightly shrugged, laughing as if was the most obvious thing ever.

“You don’t understand, Rafe, this is a no boys party, you can’t be the only partner in there, it’s gonna ruin our dynamic” you complained whining.

“See? How am I supposed to let you go on this shit if I can’t even know what you’re gonna do in there? No way, babe, I’m not changing my mind” he shook his head no, still holding you in place.

“But- Rafe, baby, please! I promise you I won’t do anything wrong, I even-“ you tried to plead again, almost desperately this time.

“No, Y/n. When I tell you no, it’s no. Is it so difficult for you to understand? Do want me to explain what a ‘no’ means?” he said sternly, so intensifying softly his grip on your arm.

“No, I get it, no need for that” you practically whispered, and he let you go “What about Liza tho? She’s waiting for me, it was important for her to have me there…” you said nipping on your nails.

“Well, she should’ve considered it before deciding on a traditional bachelorette party, she knows you have a boyfriend. Now just call her and tell her you're not going, that's it.” Rafe said while rummaging around his shirts on your shared dresser.

“That easy? And how should I say it? 'So honey, I can't go to the party we’ve planned for months because my possessive and overprotective boyfriend won't let me go out alone', can it be like that?” you ended up mocking him from how frustrated you actually were.

“Don’t fuck with me, babe” he mumbled the warning putting the clothes he chose above your bed “Just tell her that a no Rafe party, is a no Y/n party. We’re a couple, each other’s priorities, aren’t we? She will understand” he said while taking off his watch and his rings.

“Yeah, whatever, I’ll come up with something” you muttered with a sigh.

You dodged him, going towards your bedside table to grab your phone and dropping yourself above the silk sheets, taking a deep breath before texting Liza, saying that you weren’t feeling very well and thought it was better for you to stay home, telling her you were sorry for not being there tonight. Dropping your phone to your side, you sighed heavily and noticed how Rafe was watching you while he took off his dirty clothes.

“What?” you asked arching an annoyed eyebrow at him.

“I have to admit, now I feel such a shame that you got all dolled up for nothing” he pouted towards you, giving a small laugh after you rolled your eyes.

“Uh, yeah, no shit” you said under your breath, grabbing your phone again to see if there was anything that could entertain you now.

“Maybe if you hadn’t put so much effort on it, I could’ve let you out. But not like this, babe, uh uh. Too gorgeous to go around without me” he joked, still folding his clothes but never taking his eyes off of your figure.

“Yeah, sure” you wouldn’t even dare look at him right now.

“Aw come on, honey. Don’t be like that” he mewled, coming to sit beside you and putting your phone down “You know I just want to protect you. And plus, I can’t stand being here all alone while half of the island is drooling over my girl, yeah?” he smiled, leaning closer and kissing the back of your hand.

“Mhm, Rafe, go take your bath, I’m hungry and since you didn’t want me to go out, I’m not having dinner alone now” you mentioned your dissatisfaction, while trying to ignore his little touches and caresses.

“Actually, I was thinking that maybe we could go on a date?” he said kissing your neck and your jaw “Like right now. I take you to some fancy restaurant, so you won’t have spent hours getting ready for nothing, and I would also love to show off my beautiful girlfriend, show’em who gets to spoil you and call you mine, huh? What do you say?” he suggested, giving you the sweetest grin ever while moving your hair behind your ear.

“Dunno, Rafe, I’m really not in the mood for that anymore, I’m sorry” you answered with deep breath and a half-smile.

“That’s right, I get it, you’re only in the mood when is to go out with your friends, okay” he chuckled, making your roll your eyes just to earn a kiss on your cheek “But that’s fine, in this case we can stay home baby, and have our dinner together, just as you wish. I’m sure whatever you cooked is way better than food from any other restaurant” he smiled brightly.

“Yeah, it sounds good this way” you looked away, biting your inside lip to suppress a smile of your own.

“Sure, it does. And you wanna know something?” he waited for your reaction and as soon as you nodded he leaned to whisper closer to your ear lobe “I think is better for us to stay home anyways, cause ever since I entered this room and saw you dressed like this, I've been holding myself back from ripping it all off of you. So, I don't know if I could wait until we got back home” he smirked after moving his eyes from your lips to stare directly into your eyes.

“Rafey…” you whispered, doing your best to stare back at him, and not look at his lips or his hand touching ever so slightly on your thigh. Finally losing the posture you held onto since the beginning of your discussion.

“Don’t go all flustered now, babe, I know you liked it” he stole a quick peck from you before getting up from the bed “Now why don't you go over there and speed things up by setting our dining table, huh? While I take a shower to get rid of my work fatigue. I promise I'll make it up to you after dinner” he winked grabbing his towel again and going towards your bathroom.

“Okay, don’t take so long tho, I’m gonna miss you” you grinned shyly turning on your side to look at him.

“I sure won’t, love, gonna miss you too much too if I do” he grinned back making you blush “Now you, little lady-“ he leaned over the doorframe and pointed to you still on the bed in front of him “Don’t you dare taking those clothes off or ruining this make up before I come out, because tonight that’s my fucking job” he nodded before closing the door to take his bath in peace.

a/n: i think the whole dynamic in this one isn’t as toxic as in the first one, but the situation is just as fucked up, and yes, i thought about making the reader insist more in going out, and make them have a big argument, but the key from this universe is: rafe knows how to manipulate the reader, and his way of doing it is acting as normal and careful as he can, to make her believe that he does what he does because he cares about her, so she’ll always end up submitting to him. at the beginning of their relationship, she’d maybe be braver to confront him, but he manipulated her to believe that if she argues, she is the wrong one, because he acts this way to protect the woman he loves, and if she loves him back, she has to accept and submit to whatever he says or wants (all that and his super trunfo of make up sex ofc. anyways!!! hope u liked it, and if any of you want to see more of this, or make some other request, feel free to let me know :)

#rafe cameron x reader #rafe fic #rafe cameron smut #rafe x reader #rafe angst #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron #rafe outer banks #outerbanks rafe #rafe cameron x female reader #rafe fanfiction #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron fic #rafe obx #outer banks fanfiction #outer banks netflix #outer banks imagine #outerbanks

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random-imaginess · 10 months

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i’m obsessed with ur work rn omg :o can you please write a shayne x reader fic where it’s their first halloween together and they’re just indulging in all the mushy couple activities? like matching costumes, scary movies, pumpkin carving, sweater sharing, all the sweet cozy fall vibes? thanks so much! <3

Hi!! Thank you so much for sending in a request, and I appreciate your comments so much! I’m sorry it took a little bit to get posted. (Tumblr is being a pain and not letting me post things directly from my computer so I have to jump through hoops just to get these to post, it’s so frustrating!) I really hope this meets your expectations. There were so many ways I wanted to start this and so many options of what to focus on, I couldn’t decide! I do plan on posting another version of this that will capture more of a cozy couple-y vibe! And it will be longer! But I hope you like this as well!

Not to be dramatic or anything, but Halloween was THE best time of the year, and to say that you were excited to finally be able to start decorating for it would be an understatement. If you had it your way, and technically you could have, you’d keep your place decorated in a spooky aesthetic all year round! Or at least fall themed, though either option would be equally valid. This year particularly, though, you were even more excited because you were able to spend it with your boyfriend, Shayne. You and him had been friends for a little short of a decade so it wasn’t even close to being the first year you two did something together, but this year was different because you were a C O U P L E and it just hit different.

Practically since after the 4th of July you were in plot mode, having a serious conversation with him about what you were doing for Halloween. It was important to know what you were going to dress up as, and it was vital to get ahead of it so you had time to get on the same page about what you were doing. Costume parties were going to be starting soon, and you had to be ready! You had both talked about options; going as a salt and pepper shaker, Mario and Princess Peach, Morticia and Gomez Addams, or more cliché, Barbie and Ken (though Shayne would most definitely be an Allan)!

“We should go as a cat burglar!” You exclaimed out of nowhere, startling Shayne a bit as he adjusted a leaf garland he was hanging up. “What?” He chuckled. “For a matching costume idea. We could go as a cat burglar! I’d be a cat and you a burglar and together we would be a cat burglar!” You raised your brows, enthusiasm sketched all over your face like it was the most brilliant idea. “Say cat burglar again, I don’t think you said it enough times,” he teased playfully. “That would be pretty funny, though.” “Or OOOH!! Pennywise and Georgie! Wouldn’t matter who would be who!” Shayne just laughed, watching you go back to placing plastic pumpkins on the mantle above the fireplace.

“I think the best part of this costume planning is going to be watching you get all excited about what idea to go with,” he laughed again. Shayne’s ideas were more subtle, which was great too. You didn’t normally go crazy about the dressing up aspect of it, but this year you wanted to do something special since you had someone to plan this sort of thing with. And you appreciated him being such a trooper about it! “It feels weird getting this amped up about costumes because normally I would prefer to just stay in and have horror movie marathons, which you can expect we’ll be doing because you can’t not do that during the spooky season.” “Yes, of course. Though technically spooky season isn’t until October..” “That’s up for debate,” you retorted quickly, getting another laugh out of him.

“Spooky season should always happen directly after the 4th, just like they do it with Christmas after Thanksgiving. But TECHNICALLY, spooky season gets started August 1st because that’s when all the fun things start, like horror nights and spooky conventions.” You let out an excited squeal as you hyped yourself up all over again. “So many fun things are starting!!”

After finishing up the decorations, your placed mostly decked out with fall themed items; apple cider and pumpkin spice scented candles and black cats and garlands everywhere, you were very pleased with how it all turned out. Standing next to Shayne, you wrapped your arms around his waist and marveled at both of your work for a few moments. “It looks like a Spirit Halloween store threw up in here.” “I know, don’t you love it?” You grinned. Shayne wrapped his arms around your shoulders and squeezed, giving you a long hug before breaking it.

Thinking about what the next couple months were going to bring brought you so much joy. You were anxiously awaiting for the colder weather to kick in so you both could snuggle up on the couch with hot drinks and a crackling fire while you watched scary movies. You were excited for when you could carve pumpkins, make halloween goodies together, experiment with spooky themed bread because you knew Shayne would enjoy the hell out of that! There was so much to look forward to and you couldn’t wait to share this all with him.

#shayne topp imagines #shayne topp x reader #shayne topp

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seokmthw · 1 year

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search the universe | park gunwook

⇢ pairing: gunwook x reader

⇢ warnings: soulmate au, slight angst, fluff, mentions of death, brief mentions of alcohol

⇢ word count: 3.3k

⇢ synopsis: timers are stamped onto your wrist with the amount of days you have left until you either die or find your soulmate. since you had gotten yours, you had a hard time believing it was the latter.

⇢ note: i know this is a really cliché soulmate trope, but i have a love for it that i can't quite explain. i'm hoping this won't be the last you see of soulmate!zb1, so be on the lookout in the future for more from me! <3

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soulmates were a weird concept to you from the moment you learned about them. wveryone around you - friends, family, coworkers - have always been excited to find the people they’re meant to be with for the rest of their lives. you never understood the hype, much less how the actuality of it all was ever achievable in the first place. everyone whose timer you witnessed ticking down almost always met their death sentence, so you had every right to be apprehensive about whether it truly worked or if you've been fed lies for your entire life.

everyone was born with a timer on their left wrist with chunky black squares and beaming red digits that never lit up until you reached a certain age in your life. yours started on your sixteenth birthday with the fresh set of bold letters reading 1,095 days. that was exactly three years, no more, no less. it was a rare occurrence someone would ever be branded with the same date as their birthday, but the universe just seemed to hate you more and more for not believing it’s incredibly stupid logic. your nineteenth birthday was either going to be magical or tragic for those around you, but you already knew everything was going to take a turn for a worse, so why stress about it?

that day was now exactly a week away and your parents and group of friends were stressed out more than ever because they weren’t sure if they should plan a party or a funeral. you told them all not to worry about it, that you didn’t care, but they never seemed to listen. which was fine, you were used to people losing their minds over your slowly deteriorating time, but you just wished that once in a while someone would pay attention to how you felt.

especially now, where your two idiot best friends were frantically pacing the living room in your shared apartment with their thoughts spewing directly from their mouths out into the open. they had absolutely no filter, so talks about a gruesome death and an unforgettable birthday bash were the main topics.

“guys, seriously, it’s fine. i really don’t want you to be in a constant state of distress because i’m going to die before you do,” you said.

yujin stopped in his tracks, his eyes wide with bewilderment as he gasped, “y/n, if you say anything like that one more time i’m going to kick you.”

you merely shrugged, “i’m just speaking the truth.”

gyuvin, who had just thrown himself onto the plush loveseat, sighed loudly but didn’t say a word. you knew that every time you talked about this you made them upset, and tension was even higher now that the numbers on your arm had a seven on them. you just wished they would accept your fate and move on, because really, you didn’t think it was a big deal.

“come on, please don’t be upset with me,” your voice grew soft at the sight of their somber faces and your own realization that this was having more of an effect on them than you initially thought, “if i am going to die, let’s make this last week one of the best we’ve had in our lives, okay?”

yujin and gyuvin shared a look before they finally nodded and you were engulfed in a bone crushing hug. it felt good to feel their arms around you, because at the end of the day, you needed them more than anyone else in the world. you just hoped that they would be able to move on past it all and continue to live for you. after all, they adorned a hefty amount more numbers than you did, so they still had a while.

“we love you, y/n, and we get mad at you because we care so much,” gyuvin whispered, so it felt like it was only the three of you in the whole universe, “now are you going to let us plan a party or not?”

“please let us plan a party!” yujin exclaimed.

you huffed in mock annoyance, “fine, but you have to promise me you won’t go too crazy. i don’t want you guys to get your hopes up and the outcome be worse than you expect.”

“deal.”

three days after your compromise with your friends, you were sat at your favorite restaurant, where they wanted to ask your opinion on some of the party decorations. however, the initial reason was soon deflated due to you recounting a dream you had. to say they were surprised was an understatement.

"you what?” gyuvin exclaimed, causing you to cringe back into your spot of the booth. he and yujin shared almost the same expression the moment you began recounting the news to them.

slowly, you replied, “i told you, i had a dream about someone i don’t know. it was so weird though, because i couldn’t see their face whatsoever.”

and it was true. the past two nights you’d had the same exact dream. the first time, things were foggy and clouded, making it to where you could only hear his voice. however, the second night, you could make out a bright smile and glittery brown eyes, but nothing more. you met your friends’ gazes, shrugging your shoulders, “it’s really not that big of a deal. i don’t know why you guys are so surprised about it.”

“you are such a dumbass,” yujin replied as he buried his face in his hands, his voice muffled as he spoke the next time, “have you not listened to a single thing we were taught about the timers in school?”

“no! i’ve always slept, you should know that. i sat next to you during the lectures.”

gyuvin looked as if he were about to slam his head into the wall next to him, “it’s literally common sense to know that when you have a dream about someone you don’t know when your timer is almost up that it’s your soulmate.”

you rolled your eyes, shoving rice from the plate in front of you into your mouth to avoid saying anything that could upset them. no matter what anyone said, you just couldn’t even begin to think how it’s logical to believe the stuff school fed you, especially when it came to those numbers. you were absolutely not going to become brainwashed into thinking that a meager dream could have any significant correlation with your timer.

“i think you guys are just trying to get into my head to make me believe these stupid things are actually worth my time,” you laughed.

“it sounds to me like you’re trying to tell yourself not to actually take what we say into consideration,” gyuvin stated matter-of-factly, spooning a mouthful of the stew he’d ordered into his mouth, with an eyebrow quirked up in question. yujin suppressed a smirk next to him.

you fell silent at his words. it wasn’t because you believed him, because you certainly did not, but you were done talking about it. you made a promise to yourself not to utter a single word about your dream around either of your best friends - you knew they would do this - but your tongue had different plans for you and now the situation was a mess. their accusing glances, wide grins, and shared looks were enough to give it away.

you threw enough cash to pay for your meal on the table and scooted out of the booth, your lips pressed into a thin line, “i’ll see you guys back at the apartment.”

“y/n, wait!” yujin called after you, his voice faltering slightly, “we didn’t mean to upset you!”

“just let them go, yujin, all we ever do is make them mad anymore. maybe it’s best to have some time apart.”

gyuvin’s words sent a pang of guilt and sadness to your chest, and it took everything you had not to choke on a sob right then and there. it took a lot for him to say something that could be hurtful and knowing you were the one that caused it made you want to scream until your voice went hoarse. however, you refused to turn back and apologize, because you weren’t the only one in the wrong. they were just as much at fault as you were.

soon, you found yourself sat on a swing in the park a few blocks from your apartment complex, tears staining your cheeks and your heart hurting. what if your friends were right and you were just blowing the entire soulmate thing way out of proportion? was everyone else you’d seen meet their death just the less fortunate? questions flooded your mind and had no intention of stopping any time soon. you felt dizzy from your brain taking on so much at once and you were beyond grateful for the seat below your body that kept you steady.

you never thought that you would consider having a soulmate as a possibility, but here you were, wallowing in self-pity and hatred for yourself for causing everyone around you grief just because you couldn’t seem to see the logic until four days before your timer ended. sighing, you aggressively wiped away the remaining tears on your skin and rose from your spot. it was about time you started to head back to your apartment.

an apology was long overdue anyway.

ii.

thin fog swirled around your ankles as you walked toward the shadowy figure just in your line of vision. the soft pink glow of the sky reflected in his eyes - which were as sparkly and happy as ever - and glimmered beautifully in his hair. he seemed far beyond your grasp, and just when you thought you were getting closer to him, he was even further back than before.

what originally started out as a walk became a light jog in a desperate attempt to reach him. you swore for a moment you could catch a glimpse of one of his features you’d previously been unable to see before, but it was gone just as you were about to reach him. you were now broken out into a sprint, your legs burning and heart racing.

you needed to see him.

but, he just kept getting further and further away, his gaze haunting you with unanswered questions and a plethora of what if’s. you refused to give up. you pushed your legs harder, extending them to your absolute best ability to cover more distance between you and his dark presence. with your arm stretched out, you called, “wait, please!”

the boy finally stopped - though it was unclear if it was because of your desperation or exhausted state - and held his hand out for you to take. you forced your legs to a stop, your eyes frantically searching the features visible to you to try and cling on to what little you were offered. the same two features as before; his hair and his eyes.

for a fleeting moment, you saw something flicker across the the lower part of his face, just beneath his nose. However, just like that, it was gone, but you knew exactly what it was.

a gummy smile.

iii.

it was finally your birthday, and the day that you would be meeting whatever fate you had in store. you had woken up at ten o’clock, thankfully, but now it was five o’clock and you still had six hours and twenty minutes left on your timer, so anything was possible. you were a lot more nervous than you expected, but since you’d spent your entire life resenting this day, it wasn’t as overbearing as you imagined it would be.

the moment you entered into the kitchen, yujin and gyuvin were showering you in hugs and loads of “happy birthday, y/n”s but the troubled looks in their eyes were hard to miss. you could have sworn you saw a tear slip onto yujin’s cheek and that gyuvin’s breathing was slightly uneven, but you decided not to comment on it. not on this day. you didn’t think you could live with yourself if you sparked an argument on what could be some of the last moments you had with them.

instead, you hugged them both for a good five minutes, relishing in the feeling of security and comfort their grips held. the nagging in the back of your mind told you to enjoy as much of their company as you could in those remaining thirteen hours, because you very well could never get it again. and neither could they. pushing the thoughts back, you gladly dug into the dinner the pair made for you and watched the drama reruns that were playing on the television in the living room. it was a favorite among the three of you, so it only felt right to turn it on and delve into the world of your favorite characters.

about an hour later, your friends ordered you to stay in the apartment and get ready for your party while they went and set up, which was code for “hey, we don’t want some freak accident to happen before your timer is up so just stay here where we know you’re safe,” but you certainly weren’t complaining. as of right now, the safer, the better.

once left alone until they were to come to pick you up, you dropped to your knees in the middle of the kitchen and sobbed. this entire situation was all too real, and you could feel the steady grip you once had on being sure you were ready to accept your death starting to slip through your fingertips. you had no right to be upset, this was the day you were waiting for your whole life just so you could prove to everyone that you were right.

but you were just so scared.

there were so many what if’s, so many unknown factors of what the rest of your evening had in store. you weren’t sure you were ready to find out, but your timer was dead set on getting you to that point. the more you looked at the crimson numbers, the more your belly twisted and turned. you hoped that if you were to die, it was quick and painless, and if you were to meet your soulmate, you wouldn't be the most awkward person in the world.

you sat on the cold tile with silent tears flowing down your cheeks for what felt like an eternity, but only ended up being twenty minutes before you finally pulled yourself together and forced your legs to take you into your bedroom so you could get dressed. you had less than a couple hours before yujin and gyuvin would be back, and if you didn’t look collected and put together, all hell would break loose. you chuckled at the thought while you threaded your legs through your skinny jeans and put your top on.

by the time your best friends had come back to get you, you were going stir crazy penned up inside of the apartment, so you were glad to finally be going somewhere. the drive there was full of music blasting and lots of laughs, but the sadness was still heavy in the air. you couldn’t blame them, though, because you definitely felt the same way.

once at the venue, you couldn’t help but gasp at the sight. everything was outside, fairy lights casting a warm glow across the otherwise dark section of the area you were in. a bonfire was already raging in the middle of it all. people circled around it with drinks in their hands and smiles stretching across their faces. you couldn’t believe how many people actually came or how much yujin and gyuvin had outdone themselves with the entire setup.

“this is so beautiful, guys, thank you,” was the only thing you could manage to exert from your lungs before you were pulling them both into a tight hug, suppressing the fresh tears that threatened to spill over at the snap of a finger.

gyuvin laughed softly, “anything for you.”

“we love you, you know that, right?” yujin inquired, pulling back slightly so he could meet his gaze with yours, “so much.”

“i love you guys too.”

your moment only lingered for a few moments after that, because next thing you knew, people were bounding over to you and wishing you a happy birthday. hao and hanbin, who you hung out with occasionally in high school. taerae from the time you dared to sneak out of your parents’ house just to go on a midnight mcdonald’s run with him. matthew and ricky, your old roommates before you decided to move in with yujin and gyuvin. many of old classmates and even a few people you didn’t know. all for you.

you could feel yourself gaining control over your nerves and body once more as you conversed with everyone. all of the weighted thoughts were nearly forgotten about. that is, until you decided to steal a glance at the remaining time left on your wrist. you could feel your chest tighten and your breath hitch in your throat.

three minutes.

that was it. three meager minutes until you either died or met the person you were supposed to be with for the rest of your life. you swallowed harshly. it was best you didn’t mention anything and cause everyone to go into a state of panic, so instead you practically glued your arm to your side and refused to look at the time anymore. whatever was going to happen was left in the hands of fate now.

you took a drink from the cup in your hand, craving for a distraction from the anxiety that was caused from looking at your timer. a light tap on your shoulder was able to be felt and you turned to find yujin, who was smiling widely, “i wanted you to meet my friend, gunwook, who i told you was studying abroad! i figured i would invite him to the party since he was back in town.”

your gaze shifted to the boy that was stood next to yujin. the moment your eyes met with his, a spark was lit and it completely engulfed you from the inside out. the world around you faded, leaving you with only him. his dark brown hair that was illuminated by the light of the bonfire, his honey brown eyes the sparkled like the stars that blanketed the sky, but most importantly - his gummy smile.

he felt the same. you could easily tell by the way his face contorted to an expression that was nothing but pure joy. almost instantly, he pulled you into his arms, burying his face into the crook of your neck, breathing in your scent. you melted into him, basking in the warmth that he radiated and the feeling of security that you felt in his hold. softly, he whispered, “i’ve been waiting for the day i could finally hold you.”

“i’ve been waiting for the day i could put a face to all of the features i saw in my dreams,” you replied, entirely unable to suppress the grin that broke out onto your lips.

you pulled away from his grasp, flipping his wrist, as well as your own, over to bear the thick zeros that now adorned your wristsand were lit up a bright green. this was it, you finally met your fate, and you were so glad to know that it was with the captivating boy who visited you in your dreams.

gunwook cupped your cheek, examining your face, taking in every inch, every detail that he could. leaning forward, he was just barely apart from the shell of your ear, lips brushing your skin as he spoke words to you that you wanted to hear over and over again for the rest of your life.

“if i had to search the universe to find you again, i would in a heartbeat.”

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