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homingpigecns · 1 year

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until last year i stayed friends with a grand total of One (1) friend i knew in high school and now. i have finally stopped talking to that friend. it is sooooo so nice to romanticize longevity and history and wow they have always been there but there's a point where it's like.

it is so embarrassing so i haven't talked about it because it's really like, fully pathetic, but i saw them the first time recently bc i hadn't seen any rl friends bc i had a years long slump where i just kind of took up space at home and i was embarrassed about it but i got my life together again last summer and i was like okay, i can respond to the question "how are you doing?" without breaking down into tears, and my friend did express interest in seeing me again and i really wanted to see them. so i saw them a while ago and i had fun and i was so happy and i was so grateful to still have this connection after all these years, after all the ways i've been and my colorful history, and i just. their birthday was about a month later and really extremely uncharacteristically of me i remembered, and i ordered them a weird little personal birthday tchotchke off etsy and got them a michaels gift card and hit them up like. happy birthday we should hang out soon on the day of and it was all very nice. i didn't expect something soon nor did i care too much. but a couple months ago when twitter was gonna implode i followed them on insta (even though i deleted my personal insta because i know personal instas only teach me things about people i don't want to know) and as a consequence of that i learned that my friend was not able to see me because i was not invited to their birthday thing. which was with a friend of theirs i kind of know and an old close friend from high school i lost touch with but asked about and sjdfhsdf. literally expressed interest in the time i just saw them.

DO YOU KNOW HOW PATHETIC THAT IS........JUST EVERYTHING ABOUT IT..........LIKE I AM A KICKED PUPPY. I AM 24.....I HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE............I AM A UNION MEMBER........AND I GOT REALLY EXCITED ABOUT MY FRIENDS BIRTHDAY AND I WASN'T INVITED TO THE PARTY...........

and you know there are probably actual reasons. i burned bridges with people in high school that they liked more than me, and i am too mature to care about who likes more than whoever now, and it is too insane to hold things from high school against them now that i am 24 and have regular cardiologist appointments. but it is also like. how many times do i have to die. i have grown past so many things the last three years that i thought i could never overcome and i can't, i don't want to, grow into someone who is mature enough to hold someone who's been important to me since i was 14 at arms length so it doesn't hurt when they inevitably drop me. currently, i commute an hour in the wrong direction so i can be on the same train as a work friend and i am aware the energy is insane but it is my energy and giving it and getting good things from it is like. this is better for my personal development than whichever way the other direction goes.

and it's like i don't even blame my friend from high school for how they feel about me because i was insane in a bad way in high school and i've done enough it's like. whatever. but it's like, also, when it's like, yeah this was half of the two people who permanently messed you up to the point people still are like "hey i didn't see you there. come over and say hi next time" when i avoid them because they're talking to someone else, who watched your friend group make a group chat and hang out together with everyone except you and didn't say anything and you were grateful they still threw you the bone to hang out one on one and it's like. i'm not. i don't really hold it against them, it was years ago, i don't think about those people anymore and yes i am still weird in many ways but for other reasons as well, but there is like. a very huge lack of pattern recognition and failure to learn and it is absolutely. my fault. when you put it like oh the person who killed me a thousand times throughout high school and college still has the power to kill me now and sometimes will? VERY OBVIOUSLY I AM THE PROBLEM.......i can't play high school anymore i have to play Being At Work and Surviving Capitalism Despite Everything, Did You Know I Am 24

anyway i decided to just quietly softblock my friend on everything, unfriend on discord, remove myself from the situation when there wasn't really an inciting event so i could just kind of fade out. but i did just find out that my friend did notice, and blocked me on twitter without saying a word -- which you know, is fine and understandable, because i did do all of that first. but what a metaphor you know. that is what the years of friendship are, and that they have stacked up this much to still hurt me is my fault. but hopefully for the last time.

#you know i still have the birthday tchotchke and it is too nice for me to throw out and im gonna feel SO clown at michaels but like.#im really not supposed to cut people off anymore. but. that mindset did truly get me here. at the ripe age of 24.#as a person with HEALTH INSURANCE.#that hurt me man. it is so stupid bc i did it first. but man did that rude as hell You're blocked hurt my feelings today.#i was like. trying to see if i could get our chatlogs back after i deleted them which i always do after i stop talking to someone.#so probably for the better. but also #also discord definitely is what gave me away but i have like FIVE friends on discord i cant see their username all the time.........#it will hurt my feelings. i already hurt my feelings every time i see the birthday tchotchke #and u know not to play the victim bc im very evil and toxic and HOPEFULLY CHANGING all my post high school friendships have been positive #but i am evil and toxic and i do still have those tendencies secretly and its insane that my evil toxicity still let me be pathetic this #long like what were the self sabotaging defense mechanisms for i wasnt even defended #brandon oscillates #personal #vent #its just. i cant be friends with someone anymore and theres seven asterisks. other people can do that probably but like #i cant even pretend i can. i have feelings you know. at work every day i pretend im unshakable i smile at people who yell at me #i cant smile off the clock anymore. if something is important i need to act the way i really am or i will lose that person

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publiclybitching · 9 months

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GODDD CAN I STOP BEING A SCARED LITTLE BUNNY AROUND HIM I HATE IT. SOCIETY IF I HELD MY HEAD UP HIGH AND DIDNT CURL INTO MYSELF

#if i can stop being a scared little bunny around HIM then i can stop being a scared little bunny around ANYONE #idc if its a defense mechanism its a dumb one and i can do better then looking sad and pathetic

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deadsetobsessions · 5 months

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Damian Wayne was like a duckling. A violent, stab-happy, danger-prone duckling, yes, but a duckling all the same. Which means when Danny almost got stabbed by a sleepy, instinct driven Damian, he was able to wave it off with a laugh. Damian, on the other hand, stared in horror at the butter knife firmly lodged in Danny’s arm.

“PENNYWORTH!” Danny jerked back at Damian’s scream. “RICHARD! FATHER!”

God damn, the kid had a pair of lungs on him. Danny’s wince was interpreted as pain to Damian, who gently grabbed his injured arm and started to pull him towards the kitchen’s marble island.

Danny blinked, non plussed as his hearing picked up a thundering of feet as the present family members scrambled towards Damian’s distress call.

“Wait, Damian, I’m fine. It’s-”

“You have been impaled, you imbecile! Had it been any of the other simpletons, they would have-!”

“Ouch.” Danny put his other hand in mock hurt over his slow-beating heart. He literally doesn’t care about the butter knife. He’s just impressed there was enough force in there to impale him. “Are you calling me names now? After- gasp- stabbing me?”

Before Damian could reply, the beginnings of regret, remorse, and guilt on his face, Alfred, Dick, and Bruce burst into the kitchen.

“What happened?!”

“My word, master Danny!”

“What is it?!”

“I’m fine. It’s like a small stab. Not even a big stab. I’m good.”

Dick paled, seeing Danny’s arm clutched in Damian’s hand.

“That’s- that’s a knife. In your arm. How is that ‘fine’?!”

“What happened.” Bruce asked Damian, gently removing Danny’s arm from Damian’s death clutch.

“I- I did not mean to,” Damian starts, guilt coloring his voice.

“He didn’t,” Danny cuts in. “I startled him and got stabbed for being dumb. I won’t fault him for having a defense mechanism like that, ancient knows what I might do if you guys startled me.”

The awkward silence that settled at his words made Danny twitch awkwardly.

“Uh, so, can I add this knife to my collection? Even if I didn’t get mugged?”

“Danny.”

“Bruce.” Danny stared stubbornly back. With his uninsured hand, he patted Damian on the head. He was going to enjoy the fluffiness before Damian’s guilt was no longer enough to hold him back from snapping at Danny’s hand like a grumpy alligator. Bruce loses, obviously. He’s a teenager who was also an ex-vigilante. Batman’s got nothing on a determined halfa.

“Master Danny, I must insist you refrain from getting stabbed. There is only so much gauze and antiseptic cream in the house.” Alfred returned- huh, when did he leave?- with a med kit.

Danny called bullshit because he knows there’s a whole ass medical bay beneath the manor.

“Sorry.”

“No need to apologize.” Alfred said, promptly beginning the extraction of the butter knife.

“Are you okay?” Dick asked, hovering worriedly. “He- are you…?”

Damian was allowing Danny to ruffle his hair, so…

“Yep, I’m good. This isn’t even on my top thirty most painful stabbings,” and it really wasn’t. That honor was given to the GIW and that one time Jazz accidentally stabbed him with her earrings. “That was pretty impressive, actually. It’s like, a butter knife. The other ones had pointy ends.”

“Do not clump me with those pathetic wastes of spaces. I am naturally superior and would… would never harm you on purpose.” Damian said, getting quiet at the end like he was trying to plead to Danny to believe him.

“Of course not. But- if you want help me keep the knife, you can hit me with a mug, it would technically be a mugging.”

The pun got the desired effect. Damian leaned away with a disgruntled look and Dick stopped hovering as close in order to let out a small cackle.

“Done.”

“You should go get changed, kiddo. We’re going to see Tim’s photography at the Gotham Gallery today.”

“Oh, for real?” Danny patted Damian’s fluffy hair one last time, pushing away from the counter. “Oh, I’ll clean up here first and-”

“That will not be necessary,” Alfred scolded, a mop somehow already in his hands. “Please see to it you are prepared for the day.”

“Thanks, Alfred. Can I keep the knife.”

“Very well.”

“Sweet. See you guys later?” Danny pranced off after seeing the nods.

——

“He’s… he got stabbed a lot. Before us, I mean.” Dick tapped a furious rhythm onto the counter. “Not that we’ve stabbed him until now but even once is concerning for a civilian.”

“He was used to it.” Bruce replied.

“Perhaps we should join Todd in his endeavor and ensure that his worthless tormentors are permanently out of the picture.”

“God, he said top thirty. He was counting.”

Damian silently withdrew a kitchen knife.

“No murder with my quality chef’s knives, Master Damian.”

“Tt.”

“Master Jason follows the same rules. Now, out of the kitchen. I may be old, but I remember the last time master Bruce and master Dick stepped foot in here and I will not have a repeat.”

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certainnightmaretheorist · 2 years

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literally edging my sleep because I'm afraid of the unknown that comes with closing my eyes and being a bit dead for 8 hours and dreaming and

#so pathetic #maybe this is a defense mechanism #well #I'll go to sleep

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peachesofteal · 21 days

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Cool Girl

Ghoap x female reader / 18+ / masterlist

Your hand is shaking again.

It’s a defense mechanism or something, you think. Some physical manifestation of your anxiety. Something psychological, you’re sure of it.

It’s the only thing you’re sure of, if you’re being honest.

You stalk home as fast as you can, scowl affixed to your face like it’s been cemented there, seeping deep into your frown lines, etching them like a chisel on marble.

The walk sobers you. Brings you back to rational sense, little by little.

You shouldn’t have called them. You’re so dumb. You’re asking for trouble.

But is it so bad, to want to cause an emotional reaction? To want them to be as miserable as you?

It’s pathetic. A way to seek validation. A mistake.

One you’re sure you’re going to pay for.

Your front door is unlocked.

The door pushes open nearly on its own, and your eyes struggle to adjust in the pitch black of your hallway. No light from the street spills from the living room, which means the drapes have been drawn closed.

Your heart leaps into your ears, pounding between your temples at a frenzied pace.

It’s fine. You’re fine. It’s probably them.

What if it’s not? Do you have a weapon? A way to defend yourself? You find your pepper spray in your bag, readying it between trembling fingers.

“Hello?” You call.

Nothing.

“Hello… if you’re in my flat, you better-“ a firm hand grips back of your neck, like a viper assaulting its prey, and you scream.

“It’s me.” Simon murmurs into your hair, touching over your pulse. “Jus’ me.”

“You scared the shit out of me,” you twist out of his grip, fumbling for the lights.

When they flick on, you blink a few times to adjust.

He’s a sight for sore eyes in joggers, a black sweatshirt, black hat.

His eyes burn. They scald you, roving from top to toe, his mouth sealed in a scowl. “Have a nice night, sweetheart?”

You gulp. “I- I did.”

“Thought you were clever with that phone call?”

“I… I didn’t think-“

“You didn’t.” He cuts you off, and then points to living room. “Go sit on the couch.” Your hand trembles against your chest, and you hang your head.

Got the attention you wanted?

“Where’s Johnny?” You whisper as he takes the seat next to you, massive shoulders turning so he can peer downwards.

“Decided this was better to handle on my own.” Your heart squeezes painfully in your chest.

“Oh.” Simon takes a deep breath, eyeing your shaking hand, and then shakes his head. You can’t read it, can’t ever read him, and you wait with breath frozen in your lungs, wait for him to say something, anything.

But what comes next, is not what you expected.

“Johnny’s in love with you.” You jerk back, eyebrows raised into your hairline.

“No.” Your voice trembles. “No, this… this is casual.”

“It is.” Simon’s lips press flat. “The girl at the hotel, she was a job. Had nothin’ to do with our… personal lives. She was a loose end to tie up when we got back. It was convenient, that she lived in our city.” Your mind tumbles and falls, your sense dives off a cliff.

Johnny’s in love with you.

“I don’t understand… you, after-“

“I let you believe it.” He says simply, looking down his nose at you. He’s never looked so cold. “At first, I wanted to explain, to correct it, for his sake, but… the opportunity was too good. So I told Johnny that you reminded me of our arrangement. That you agreed, that you always said you didn’t want a relationship. The situation at the bar with your date,” he smiles self indulgently “that was just for fun. Would’ve fucked ya right up against that door for the whole bar to see if you let us. Split that pretty pussy open on my cock and watch you gag on Johnny’s, but you still wanted to be a brat,” he rolls his eyes, “it was all a distraction I built for him.”

Alarm bells blare inside your skull, Johnny’s words from the other day when he brought the flowers repeating over and over.

“Ye think ye saw us with another woman, or on a date, but-“

“Ye agreed. Ye always said ye didnae want a relationship.”

“No- no. He… he came here, he made it sound-“

Simon studies you. “He’s explosive, sometimes. Doesn’t handle his emotions well, gets all twisted up. I think when he came over here, he wanted you to tell him you wanted more,” he sighs, rubs his chin. “He’s so out of sorts over it all, poor boy.”

“Why? Why didn’t you… why didn’t you tell him the truth? Or me?” His lips curl into a sneer.

“Because Johnny is mine. I might share his body with you, sweet girl, but I won’t share his heart.”

#lmao #peaches writes #cool girl #ghoap x reader

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weltonreject · 2 years

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#i have so little faith in the future i really need a pick me up #but WITHOUT someone belittling me and saying that i'm just being pathetic and giving up #it's a DEFENSE MECHANISM SUSANNE what do you WANT from me #i am facing the extinguishing of my identity where do you i'm going to get the energy??? it'll just APPEAR and i'll POWER THROUGH #i want to be dead thank you very much #realized i have to go through another phase of sleeping on the floor and i'm just #i am struggling to do what's best for me bc doing what's worse is so much easier and that's the short and long of it #del

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silversainz · 1 year

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attention for you ★ CL16

summary: doing nothing but teasing him all day, now you have to deal with the consequences of your own actions

warnings: literally porn, mean dom!charles, sub!reader, kinda bratty reader if you squint, unprotected sex (don't do that) choking, degradation, Spanking, face slapping if you squint, doggystyle, fingering, begging, petnames, public sex (kinda), re-edited version but I kinda gave up on editing the whole thing so it’s very sloppy and rushed!

you bit back a giggle as you felt Charles' hand tightening on your arm as he led you through the crowd of photographers and mechanics, not even bothering to say anything or even give them a simple wave. no he only cared about getting you to his room and bending you over for your little stub you pulled earlier.

“what the hell were you thinking huh" he said as he practically shoved you into his room, the giggle you held in, coming out as you looked at him and saw steam practically coming out of his ears, as he paced around the room, hands on his hips.

“what I didn't do anything" you bite on your lip, innocently putting up your hands in defense.

Charles only shook his head and walked up to you, pushing you up against the wall, making you whine out in pain as your back hit the wall with a loud thud. "Didn't do anything, no?" he chuckled against your cheek, before wrapping his cold hand around your throat

he leaned in towards your ear, "oh no I think you did something, love" you felt his grip on your neck loosen and watched as he backed away from you, going to sit on his couch, legs spread open, making you bite on to your lip at the sight of him.

“come here” he pats his lap. which you happily walk over to him. a gasped left your lips as he grabbed onto your arm and forced you to fell on his lap, legs on either side of him. his hand immediately went underneath your short skirt you wore, causing another gasp to leave your lips as he played with your core through white panties

“already wet, pathetic” a moan fell from your mouth as he pushed your panties to the side and pushed a finger in, “so fucking wet” your head fell on his shoulder, as he rubbed circles on your clit, while placing soft kisses to your neck, before biting down making a swarm of moans and cries leave your mouth.

“fuck Charles” he chuckled against your cheek, pulling his fingers away from your pussy, causing you to whine out and try to grind against his hand, but his other hand slapped at your ass, stopping you from doing so.

“don’t think there isn’t any consequences for your actions you pulled earlier” he pulled your skirt up to wrap around your torso. you gave him a pout, which caused him to laugh at you “that fucking pout isn’t going to work now, love” you rolled your eyes. opening your mouth to give him a smart remark, but his hand coming in contact with your bare ass, made you close your mouth. as you fell forward.

“count” his other hand gripped at your jaw tightly in his hand. You nodded your head, which made him roll his eyes at you, “speak” he spat out, his hand smoothing over your bare ass.

“yes sir”

he dropped your jaw, “good girl” he said, as his hand came in contact with your ass

“one”

again

“Two”

again

“Three”

And again

“four”

And again

“five”

“Six

“Seven”, by now tears fell down your cheeks falling on to his red Ferrari shirt. he gripped on to your hair, tearing your head away from his shoulder making you face him again.

“You look so pretty like this” you sobbed as you felt his hand run over your ass again, knowing what was about to happen. “I think you can handle ten, no” you rapidly nodded your head no. but the smirk that grew on his face told you he didn’t care about your head shakes.

“Please no” you said, voice small and almost sounded like a whisper. he gently caressed your cheek, placing a kiss to your tear stained cheek.

“think you’ve learned your lesson” you nodded your head, which earned you a soft slap to your face.

“y-yes I have”

"well then, here's the deal" you whined and shook your head, “n-no deal, just fuck me please” his head fell back as he laughed at your words.

“no, don’t think so” he lifted you off his lap, laying you down on the couch.

"since you decided to be a brat and tease me, and pull those stupid stunts that you did. you're gonna let me have my way with you, however I like," you happily nodded, before you felt him grip onto your hair harshly pulling on it. "But you don't get to cum until I say so '' your grabbed at his wrist, tears falling from your eyes at that.

“N-no plea-

Charles put his hand up to your mouth, shushing you. "you did to yourself brat, if you behaved you wouldn't be in this position" he grabbed onto the back of your head, crashing his lips onto yours, the kiss was rough and sloppy, making drool drip down your jaw

Charles kept his true to his words, as muffled moans left your mouth as you felt Charles rough hand come in contact with your bare ass again, making you dig your hands into the leather couch that you both laid on top of.

"fuck Charles, I'm close please" you had probably said those words more than you could probably count at the moment, as you felt your orgasm approaching, but crying out as you felt Charles slow his movements down once again.

"no, please charles" you begged, but he only laughed at your begging.

"remember the fucking deal" he lowered himself down to your ear, a chuckle leaving his lips as he saw the tears running down your face while your eyes were rolled back.

"god you look fucking pathetic like this." you felt his hand tighten around your neck, pulling your body back against his, while he continued fucking you with an brutal pace, showing no signs of slowing down."Knowing any fucking body could walk in and see you like this"

"To see you getting fucked like an slut" a choked moaned left your lips, as you lifted your hand up to put at the back of his head, gripping onto his hair, nothing but his name falling from your lips.

"So, so fucking pathetic, couldn't even help till I was done with an interview to fuck me" he loosened his hand from your neck and pushed your body back down into the couch, grabbing onto both of your arms, while he pounded into you with full-force, not even caring that nobody could now hear your moans that were escaping your mouth, and the sounds of skin slapping.

"fuck Charles" you practically screamed out, as you felt him hit that one particular area that had your hands bailing up and stomach clutching "please don't stop" you cried out as you felt him drop your hands, and come in contact with your red and bruised up ass.

more tears fell from your face as you felt his movements slow down and slowly pull out of you, groaning. "Fuck no, Charles, please, please" he said nothing to your begs and pleads, only flipped you over on your back and wrapped your legs around his waist, his hand toying with your clit, laughing as he heard you immediately moan out.

"such a pretty needy girl" he leaned down his forehead against yours, while his hand toyed with your wet folds, his finger teasingly messing with your hole.

"please charles, let me cum" you softly grabbed at his hand, sobbing sounds leaving your lips. As he put his hand against your cheek, creasing it softly in his palm. "Such a pretty baby," you gave him a weak smile. a loud grasp leaving your lips as you felt him brutally thrust into you.

"fuckk, don't stop please" your legs shook stomach clutching as you felt your orgasm approaching strongly

“go ahead, cum sweetheart”

#charles lecrelc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc smut #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc oneshots #formula one x you #formula 1 smut #formula 1 x you #f1 smut #f1 x reader

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randoimago · 9 months

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Headcanons of Peter B. Parker, Miguel, The Spot, and Hobie have a crush on an oblivious reader?

Crushing on an Oblivious Reader

Fandom: Spiderverse

Character(s): Hobie, Peter B. Parker, Miguel, The Spot

Type of Request: Headcanons

Note(s): God I love the idea of these specific people having a crush on an oblivious reader because I feel like it's just chaos no matter where you look. All of them are v dramatic for different reasons tho

Hobie

Oh he finds your oblivious to be very amusing. At first, he thought you were ignoring his advances to spite him for some reason (which he'd respect it). But then he just realizes that you don't get it.

Honestly, not too surprising you don't pick up on his advances. He doesn't do things the typical way. Flowers? Chocolates? Like hell he'd contribute to capitalism to flirt with you. He also doesn't really flirt with you with the standard "your eyes are pretty" "you look cute today" yeah no. It's definitely "hey, let's go to this protest and shout ACAB at any cops that walk by"

The most "romantic" (he doesn't believe in romance) thing he does is play his guitar for you. Even then it's lots of loud noises but he throws all of his emotions into it so that's something.

Miguel

Considering he doesn't even try to make it obvious that he likes you, it's no wonder you haven't realized. Hardly anyone knows that he's even "flirting" with you (making you 'employee of the month' isn't flirting, it does make Lego Spider-Man suspicious tho).

He's nicer to you than others, but that's something that even he is oblivious to and if Lyla or Peter mentions it then he denies as a defense mechanism. You deny it because you really don't see it.

The funny thing is, Lyla has gone behind his back to send you cute messages and stuff from his email but even those you don't get (and he doesn't know she does it) so now she's getting frustrated on his behalf.

Peter

He is gradually going insane with how you're not picking up on his advances. He's given you flowers, chocolates, he's said really dumb dad jokes to leave a smile on your face. But if anyone mentions your relationship it's always, "Yeah he's a good friend!" and he dies inside.

Has gone to Miles and Gwen for help. He can't believe he resorted to asking teenagers for help hitting on you and he can't believe he's trying to follow their ideas. (he mentioned looking up "how to flirt" and when the word "thicc" left his mouth, it caused an uproar)

Honestly wanted to get the sweatpants out and brood because maybe if he looks like a sad hobo then you'll give him attention. His doctor told him he'd die without your attention so please notice him before he goes bald.

Spot

Does not know how to flirt so your obliviousness is both understandable and killing him because he's trying. He's trying so hard and it's so pathetic. Especially because when he fails with his flirts, the self-consciousness kicks in and then he's just sad.

His words are stutters, he has tried to steal you flowers only for one of his spots to grab a cactus instead (which he ended up pricking himself with and now needs tweezers). Wanted to win you a teddy bear at a carnival cause that's cute, right? But he can't find a damn dimension with a carnival! (unless you count the spider society cause they're a whole circus)

Would probably just end up so dejected because he's tried so hard and has finally chalked it up to you not getting his advances because you don't want to. Why would you even like someone covered in spots like him? You trying to comfort him doesn't really help either. Maybe he'll sadly confess to you, maybe he'll die alone, who knows at this point.

#tw arachnophobia #arachnophobia tw #spiderverse x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #peter b parker x reader #hobie brown x reader #the spot x reader #jonathan ohnn x reader

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ravengards-rogue · 2 months

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i think it's interesting that astarion has a tendency towards apathy. or at least, on the surface - this is the identity that he believes suits him best. that his roguishness and selfishness and otherwise immoral character is all born from apathy. it's always a song and dance, a show of who can care less. i can't speak much of astarion pre-spawn but post-cazador there is always this bitter cat-and-mouse game.

nothing matters except me. nothing matters except my safety, and the only reason it's worth concern is as it pertains to me. i do think some part of that's genuine. i think 200 years of vile abuse does that to someone and astarion, without debate, was once a very shitty person.

but then, astarion gets company. meets people who are annoying and heroic and silly and empathetic. he meets you - someone who is at some point willing to give his agency back to it, or has some interest in maintaining it. someone who at a baseline just respects him as an autonomous being. and then the mask of apathy, very quickly falls apart. the apathy, the anger, the bitterness - it's all there. it's still there, even when there's someone who cares for him.

but admidst the ending world there's. someone. just someone. and that's as little as it really takes to break astarion in such a particular way. and then you come to realize that he is actually so inconceivably far from infallible. there's something quite pathetic to him. to all of him. underneath of all that is such gripping and miserable loneliness that all it takes for him to care or want is something as basic as respect - you start to think of him very differently.

you see him for what he is which is afraid. always. perpetually. ingrained deep into his bones, terrified. the mask of apathy is worn with the explicit purpose of redircection. if astarion can convince you that he cares for nothing but himself, maybe he can convince himself too. maybe you won't notice all the ways in which he is broken down. maybe you won't notice the way he lingers in hugs and the way his voice breaks trying to assure you want him. maybe if astarion wins at this - nothing will be taken from him.

maybe, maybe - if astarion can play at apathy he can convince himself he doesn't want you love him at all. not once. he can convince himself that the warm feeling of your hands and the self-assured firmness of your love isn't something he wants to fall back on. maybe he can convince himself he'll move on when he outlives you.

maybe if astarion never shows that it all matters to him so much nothing will be taken from him again. what a poor defense mechanism though, really - because all of it seems to matter to him so much

#zero.thoughts #zero.astarion #astarion x reader #<- lol #zero? bg3 posting? i know shocking #i was just thinking about him

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milkshakestogo · 4 months

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Yuji stans who spent the last year listening to people say he sucks as an MC are probably feasting right now. Our boy is back! And his number one hater, Sukuna, is big mad.

248 confirms what I've always thought about Sukuna: he's an empty being. He has always been characterized as a hedonist but imo he's much more of a shitty deluded nihilist. There's an innate emptiness inside of him that he has rationalized to be a general meaningless to life, and for as much as he derides others for living for their "ideals," he spends his existence constantly reaffirming his own beliefs. The unshakeable sense of self he is always boasting about is nothing more than a defense mechanism to cope with the fact that he's extremely hollow.

Being trapped inside Yuji's head is the first time he's unable to ignore his own emptiness. He can't brush off Yuji like the meaningless enemies of his past because he's seen Yuji's reason for living. He's witnessed what it's like for life to actually mean something. And that irritates him because it goes against the pitiful belief he's clung to for a thousand years. If there's actually meaning in joy, pain, love, sorrow, friendship...then what the fuck has he been doing all this time?

The odds are extremely low, but I can picture a Hell's Paradise-type ending where Sukuna quite literally gives up. At this point, it's hard to see any way the main cast could actually overpower him, even with the power of teamwork and whatnot. Sukuna's just too OP. He's dropping sorcerers left and right. But I do see him growing bored of the fight and the possible future. And the realization that he has been pathetically clinging to his own ideals could be a character-breaking moment. Because otherwise, he activates the merger, plays around with the super being made from the merger...then what? He'd once again be bored and pass the time until death. And without Kenjaku around, there's no promise for future excitement. A future where Sukuna can't constantly reaffirm his own ideals is probably his own version of hell. Because Sukuna is Yuji's biggest hater, he might just activate the merger as a last fuck you and the final threat to the cast would be whatever eldritch abomination is created from Tengen.

I'm just rambling and I think the chances of this happening are low, but I think I would be satisfied if the story ended this way. Otherwise, Gege would have to pull off a huge big-brain moment for me to believe our cast stands a chance.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk spoilers #sukuna #jjk #jjk meta #jjk analysis #jjk 248 #ryoumen sukuna #sukuna analysis #jjk manga spoilers #yuji itadori #itadori yuuji

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elsfleur · 1 year

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⋆·˚ ༘ * ALWAYS AN ANGEL, NEVER A GOD

best friend!ellie x reader

summary: ellie williams has had enough of heartbreak for her entire lifetime, vowing to never fall in love again, her best defense mechanism: but you were so soft, so inevitable.

content warning: story inspired by this loser!ellie headcanons post by the lovely syd (@elliesflower) includes light mentions of smut, pining and traumatic past relationships

word count: 1,006

🪷 ʾ ⠀

a bundle of sharp ends and rough edges, inconveniently timed jokes and tempered anger management, your ellie was a sight to behold in her armour, though you preferred the skin beneath it: bruised and relentless, tarnished by survival, tender like a kiss. if she had been slightly more courageous she might’ve noticed your gaze– but she was not. claiming herself cowardly damaged goods ellie williams would smudge sketches of you from tears who dared misbehave into free fall mid drawing.

she had your features memorised like a map, the valley of your cheeks, crease of your eyes, mountains of the lips, pictured herself constantly visiting your limbs for sightseeing and painted you in sunset colours like a dream as if she was not living her own personal nightmare.

you were dancing with dina now, her hands by your waist as you grinded down her crotch painstakingly in slow motion to the rhythm of jesse’s playlist, ellie sucked in a breath and gulped down her beer as she steadied herself. it had barely been forty eight hours since you found yourself crying by ellie’s lap in the middle of the night over a long due breakup, her murder jokes becoming funnier the more tired you became, no one would’ve guessed by your radiance and movement just how heartbroken you had been, but your best friend knew, and she was glad for your peace of mind even if it was an intoxicated response.

you smiled at her once your body finally swayed back up, shaking away the brunette’s grip and offering up your arms to a flushed ellie who anticipated your request and shook her head.

“nope, i don’t dance”

“please” you hummed and she shuddered, erupting in pathetic shivers through every inch of skin. you had grabbed her drink and placed it down before taking her hands into yours and pulling them towards your waist, bright red replacing pale peach all across her cheeks with the thoughts that raced through ellie’s mind unwelcomed, would you plead like that with her tongue by your cunt too?

“you’re my favourite person in the world” you whispered by her ear closing the gap between your bodies as the song switched to something slower, ellie smiled in response fiddling with the belt loop of your jeans “should’ve dated you instead of that asshole” and with that joke, she choked.

🪷 ʾ ⠀

you had been crying again, legs carrying you towards ellie’s doorstep for the third time this week, she had fallen asleep on the couch somewhat anticipating your arrival ready to answer the door after glancing at the bright clock alarming 2:54 a.m. she swung it open with a yawn and stared you down: tousled hair of sleepless nights tossing, swollen lips and glossy eyes in a white nightgown too naked for jackson weather you looked like a fallen angel left abandoned at her doorstep. the softness of your voice snapped her of thoughts, the smallest hi els coming out through lumped throat, you fell towards her arms and latched on.

she held you as one held a star; not quite sure what to do with the sharp ends, not quite able to stare at its light, cutting herself at your vertices and squinting eyes at your sight to refrain from further falling.

“baby” ellie cooed lightly shoving you towards the couch, a lead which you complied plopping down the soft fabric alongside her “she never deserved you anyways, remember that one time she said your favourite ice cream was overrated? frankly a bitch” you giggled in reponse.

“no no i’m serious, or that other time we found series dvds and binge watched friends and she said ross didn’t cheat on rachel? or when you were cold and pouty and she just told you she couldn’t control the weather? seriously it is astounding how you saw any redeeming qualities in her, what was she like super good in bed?”

your laughter ceased, suddenly embarrassed “she never even” you started but shook your head, though ellie would not let you drop it now, widened eyes and amused smile growing.

“what?”

“ellie, just drop it”

“she never even what? made you cum?”

your silence answered her question louder than a nod could have and she choked back laughter whilst you dug your blushed face into the nearest throw pillow, endless musings on how you must be awfully frustrated and jesus angel why didn’t you tell me i would’ve had you break up with her if i knew, could’ve given her lessons- ow! don’t hit me.

“it’s not like you’re a fucking sex expert, williams” you mocked instinctively, rolling your eyes at your amused best friend.

“sure, i could still for certain make you cum though”

“stop fucking around”

“i’m not, i’m being serious!” the laughing stopped as she licked her lips “i would show you but i’m not a rebound girl”

this was the point ellie should’ve guessed it was a dream, your bright eyes looking back at her glinting at desire in a way that bordered filthy, a hunger unbeknownst to most people in their entire lifetime while the plead show me escaped past your reddened lips. she didn’t even hesitate before pressing against you, breath hovering your face as she propped herself up on top of your layed body radiating warmth like forest fires attaching themselves to every cell of her skin, the second your lips found eachother fireworks exploded by her insides.

you whimpered into her mouth, a begging, and she complied eagerly lowering herself trailing wet kisses down your neck till it stained them purples and reds, she wished to paint you whole with her tongue, hands reaching between your thighs and squeezing, your loud reaction stealing a curseful moan from herself.

and then the fucking doorbell rang. and you dissolved. and she rubbed her eyes and looked at the clock and there it was 2:52 a.m. she opened the door and her angel appeared again, though now aware none of what was wished upon would come true at her appearance.

🪷 ʾ ⠀

#ellie williams x reader #ellie x reader #ellie williams #the last of us #ellie williams fanfic #the last of us fanfiction #ellie x fem reader #lesbian #ellie williams smut #ellie williams fluff #loser!ellie #elsfleur

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wonusite · 1 year

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Fool For You

❝ We’re all fools when it comes to love, and the cute nerd in your calculus class has to learn this the hard way. Luckily, you’re there to help him through it. ❞

pairing: joshua hong x female reader

genre: college au, fwb au, smut, fluff

word count: 5.1k

warnings: nerd!shua, cheerleader!reader, josh is nothing more than a simp in denial, shua is also vv bad at hiding his feelings, mingyu is the captain of this ship, jealousy, pining, teasing, begging, cockwarming, oral sex (f receiving), riding, spanking, multiple creampies, unprotected sex, jealous sex, overstimulation

read part one

a/n: written due to my inability to get over this concept. minors dni!!!

Josh is almost too good at hiding his budding feelings for you. It’s funny how good he is at pretending that he doesn’t feel an inexplicable warmth in his chest when you sit next to him in calculus. It’s even funnier how he manages to convince you that he’s unaffected when you continuously go to the library just to spend time with him. And it’s fucking hilarious how he acts like he hasn’t seen the latest photos and videos you’ve uploaded when he knows full well that he has the post notifications on for all your socials.

Part of him knows that this facade he has going on is only a byproduct of his denial. After all, the feeling he gets in his chest every time he so much as thinks about you only becomes real if he acknowledges it. His unwillingness to admit his growing feelings is a defense mechanism of sorts because no one had ever made him feel the way you did.

It comforting to him that you actually like the more irritating parts of his personality. The cold and aloof attitude he displayed turned off a lot of people who would’ve otherwise been in his life. But you didn’t care about that because you liked every part of him.

Joshua tries not to think of all this as you’re literally bouncing on his cock, but it’s hard not to. Not with the way your head is thrown back in pleasure, pretty lips dropped open as even prettier moans spill from them. The way your captivating eyes are focused on his face when you come down from yet another orgasm has his cock throbbing wildly. It’s hard to not be overwhelmed with emotion when you direct that beautiful smile of yours at him.

A smile that’s meant for him and only him.

In an effort to focus on the pleasure and not the intensity of the feelings consuming his entire being, he starts to snap his cock into you more harshly. Your shaky moans and needy whimpers make him tighten his grip on your waist. Josh can’t stop a teasing smirk from lifting his lips when he feels your hot cunt start to spasm around his dick. Your arousal is dripping down to his balls and has a wet slapping sound filling his room. The carnal heat in his gut clouds his mind as he starts to guide you down on his dick to fuck you deeper.

“I– fuck.” You let out a choked moan, feeling Josh’s throbbing tip hit your sweet spot. “Gonna come again.”

Josh loves how fucked out you look, completely gone in the pleasure only he can give you. “Yeah? Come for me, pretty girl.”

You love it when he calls you that, and you’re pretty sure he knows it because he always calls you that when he wants you to come on his cock. Josh’s large hands smooth up your body to roughly palm your tits. A loud cry escapes you when he pinches and pulls your sensitive nipples. That’s all it takes for you to gush around his cock.

His hips don’t stop, chasing after his own high with a ferocious need. Josh’s large hands snake down your body and grab a handful of your ass to roughly pull you deeper onto his cock, the giant tip hitting deeper inside you than before. You can feel him throbbing inside you wildly as he starts bouncing you up and down his fat cock.

“Josh!” You cry out when he slams into your spongy spot with a particularly sharp thrust.

The loud cries and moans you’re letting out turn into pathetic mewls as he repeatedly slams over that spot again and again. Joshua watches your eyes roll to the back of your head, absolutely mesmerized. It’s an erotic sight that triggers his own orgasm. Thick ropes of cum spill inside you, filling you up to the brim. Your moans mix in with Josh’s as his seed slowly spills down to his balls.

For a moment, you two just hold on to each other. Josh softly rubs his cheek against your chest, not wanting to seperate from you. He loves the feeling of your nails gently running through his hair and grazing his scalp. It feels oddly intimate, yet he doesn’t stop you from doing it.

A sudden possessiveness overwhelms him, and before he realizes what he’s doing, he has you pinned underneath him, cock still fully sheathed inside you. The teasing grin you’re directing at him makes his dick throb in need.

“Still want more?” You ask through quiet pants.

“You know I’ll never get enough of you, baby.”

His smooth voice has your cunt squeezing his aching cock once again, velvety walls locking him in and refusing to let him go. Joshua lets out a low groan as he snakes an arm around your waist to pull you flush against his chest. “Fuck. Your greedy little pussy won’t let me go, babe.”

His hips press into yours, and you can only whimper when the fat tip of his leaking cock brushes against your sweet spot. Your eyes roll back as you push your hips up to meet his gentle thrusts. It makes Josh smile. You’re always so pliant and needy for him, always ready to take everything he gives you.

“Oh, fuck!” You moan wantonly as his thrusts turn sharp and rough.

His balls are clapping against your ass and your arousal is coating his entire pelvis—the wet slapping sound of sex filling his room. A carnal need suddenly consumes Josh, and he starts drilling into you at an unrelenting pace. Your choked moans and loud crises of his name has Josh’s chest burning with insatiable desire. It’s apparent in the rhythm he sets as he’s stretching you open on his cock.

You’re starting to lose yourself to the pleasure his big dick is bringing you, but you can still feel the way his arm releases your waist and trails down to your puffy cunt. Josh’s long fingers start rubbing quick circles on your sensitive clit, the delicious motion making you see stars.

“Your pussy was fucking made for me.”

He knows you’re too far gone to answer when all you can do is moan stupidly, eyes rolled all the way back as his fingers pinch and twist your puffy clit. Still, your hips are still twisting in time to meet his deep thrusts. Josh feels his heart start to race when your breathe out his name so desperately, hot walls squeezing the sensitive head of his cock when he slams against your sweet spot.

Right now he feels drunk, trying futilely to hold back the needy whines and whimpers on the tip on his tongue. He grips your hips and focuses on fucking his aching cock into your doughy count. Josh’s pace stutters when you mewl his name with something that comes dangerously close to affection.

Everything is almost too much for him—you are almost too much. He’s gotten better at fucking you and not letting too much of his emotions through, but fuck. You always made it so hard. Every time you blink up at him with your pretty eyes and cute pout he feels like you can see right through his stoic facade.

Your walls squeeze his cock, and he knows you’re close. He is too. “You...” he grunts, jaw clenching as he fucks into you. “Do you love m— this?”

Joshua stresses the last word, eyes bulging when he realizes what he almost asked you. Luckily, you were too fucked out to notice. He keeps pounding into you, wondering why his heart feels like it’s on the verge of exploding.

With a few more strokes, you two come at the same time, smashing your lips together to swallow each other’s moans. For now, Josh only focuses on the way you just melt against him, seeking a comforting embrace. He gives it to you like always, slowly easing himself out of you before gently rubbing along your spent body.

You blink back into reality when you feel a warm towel between your legs, gently and attentively cleaning you up. A soft sigh escapes you. If only you could lay in between your little nerd’s soft sheets forever.

“You don’t have to leave.” Josh is quick to say when you sit up and start getting dressed. He almost wants to hit himself for how awkwardly desperate he sounds.

You look back at him with a quiet giggle. “I know, but if I stay we’ll end up fucking all night and I won’t have any energy for practice tomorrow. The team’s still annoyed with me because I haven’t been landing my stunts like I usually do.”

Before you, Joshua didn’t believe cheerleading to be an actual sport. Shaking pompoms and chanting some cheesy cheer didn’t seem like something that required any actual athleticism, but as he got to know you, he realized that he had it all wrong. Tumbling and flying were nothing if not athletic. The proof was in your physical state. More often than not, you would suffer from muscle strains and ligament sprains.

“Cheer is a contact sport, Joshy.” You said casually as you iced your ankles one day. “Every time I land one of my stunts, I’m landing on five times my body weight. This sort of thing is bound to happen.”

It only made the feeling in his chest intensify after you casually dismissed the clear pain you were in. Since then, this lingering feeling always creeps up on him when you’re around. It’s the same feeling he has as he watches you gather your things. Even as you press a chaste kiss on his lips to say goodbye, the feeling doesn’t go away.

“What’s wrong, babe?” Josh groans with a small smirk. “You sound like you want something.”

You swallow the whimper at the edge of your throat and will yourself to come to your senses. Yes, you were becoming impatient, but this time you were determined to not beg. Somehow, you managed to let out a breathy scoff. “That’s funny because it feels like you want something.”

Josh doesn’t know when you made it a habit to cockwarm him every time you two study at his place, but he’s not complaining. The feeling of your tight cunt wrapped snugly against his cock is a feeling he’ll never get sick of. Plus, he absolutely loves it when you fall apart for him, so desperate and needy.

It’s sort of a game between you two now. Both of you want to see the other give in first and move. You always say it’s not fair that he rolls and pinches your clit to get you to grind your hips. He always points out it’s not fair of you to clench down on him knowing that the tightness of your cunt drives him crazy with need.

This time, however, you’re winning.

His thick cock is throbbing inside you wildly, and Josh keeps burying his face into your neck. The feather light kisses he was placing on the tender flesh at the beginning of your game have become harsher and more frequent.

“And if I do? Will you give it to me?”

Fuck.

“You’re creaming all over my cock, baby.” Josh’s lips brush against your cheek sinfully. “Making such a fucking mess. Be a good girl and move for me, hm?”

He’s goading you into moving your hips to fuck yourself on his cock, but you don’t relent, knowing he’s so close to snapping. “I don’t feel like being a good girl.”

Josh’s large hands leisurely wander up and down your body, rolling your hardened nipples between his warm fingers. “You’re so mean.”

You can only smirk as his hands settle on your hips. “I learned from the best.”

All it takes is you clenching down on him one more time for Josh to give in. The grip on your hips becomes bruised as he starts to thrust deeply into your dripping cunt. His thrusts are rough and sharp, not once stopping in his fast pace.

All he can think is how he’s going to make you gush on his cock all night. You did win, after all.

Josh can’t put a name on what you two have. To say it’s a friends with benefits relationship doesn’t really seem to fit. It’s not like you two are enemies, but to say that you're actual friends doesn’t seem right either. Sure, he’s grown significantly more fond of you since you took his virginity, but despite everything, he still doesn’t know how to label what you two have.

Maybe that’s why he freezes when Vernon asks if you two are dating.

The small table at the corner of the library suddenly goes uncomfortably silent. Vernon and Soonyoung exchange a look as Jeonghan watches, entirely amused, when Josh grows visibly flustered.

“No.” You say without looking up from your phone. “We just hang out sometimes.”

Your answer is accepted without much doubt, and soon enough the conversation continues as if the initial question was never asked. Jeonghan is the only one to notice his friend’s displeased frown. He wonders if Josh is aware of the face he’s making. Probably not.

It’s true that you and Josh aren‘t dating, but you didn’t have to be so hasty to confirm that fact to Vernon. You also didn’t have to sound and act so indifferent when the question came up. It probably shouldn’t bother him as much as it does, but he can’t help the bitterness that fills his mouth when he keeps thinking about your response. To reduce what’s going on between you two as hanging out was borderline insulting. Sure, it was mainly sex, but there was an underlying intimacy to this thing you guys had.

But clearly, you didn’t seem to think so.

And why should it matter to him if you didn’t see it the way he did?

So what if Josh knows what kind of foods you like? So what if he knows that you prefer to be the big spoon when you two cuddle? So what if he knows that you’re majoring in computer science despite your parents being against it? So what if he knows that you never wanted to be a cheerleader, but only did it to please your mother? So what if he knows that you’re more than just a pretty face like everyone thinks?

None of that means you two are together or will be in the future. And that’s fine. In fact, it’s perfectly fine and doesn’t bother Joshua at all.

He’s the one who insisted on keeping things between you two casual, anyway. It was only natural for you to act like your relationship was only physical.

When Jeonghan invites him to the football game on Friday night, Josh isn’t sure why he agrees to go. He’s never been interested in football, and he certainly wasn’t now. However, to be able to see you in your cheer uniform was an opportunity he couldn’t pass up. The sight alone feels worth it to him.

That is, until he sees the paint on your cheek.

Joshua feels like his jaw could snap from how hard he’s clenching it. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knows he shouldn’t be so angry. It’s not like you two were even dating. But still, how could you write Kim fucking Mingyu’s number on your cheek? Did the time you two spend together mean nothing to you?

“Can you make it any more obvious?” Jeonghan wonders with a smirk.

Finally, Josh manages to take his eyes off of you to look at his friend. “What are you talking about?”

“We can all tell you’re mad, but aren’t you the one who told Y/N that you just wanted to fuck on the DL with no strings?”

Joshua isn’t a violent guy, but the urge to throttle his friend has never been stronger. Technically, yes, he did say that to you at one point. But he also didn’t go around flirting with other girls despite there not being anything between you two that went beyond a physical relationship. Not like how you were flirting with every jock that came by to say hi to you. Especially that stupid Mingyu guy.

“I just think her behavior is so high school. Who still does the number on the cheek thing?” Josh’s sulky scowl deepens when he watches you laugh along to something Mingyu said.

“Maybe it is.” Jeonghan has to physically stop himself from cackling. “But so is yours.”

Josh can’t really say anything because it’s true. He was acting like a jealous teenager whose actions were being dictated by spite. Still, one thing was certain. As soon as the game was over and he took you back to his place, he was going to remind you that no one was capable of fucking you he did.

You don’t think much of Josh’s silence when you get back to his place. Well, that’s not exactly true. Part of you is excited because it seemed like your friend’s cliche plan was actually working. Ever since you got drunk and let it slip to Mingyu that you had feelings for Josh, he made it his personal mission to play matchmaker. You were too embarrassed to say that you guys were actually fucking, but the feelings seemed to be one-sided.

Mingyu’s plan was a bit simple minded since it all depended on a tale as old as time—jealousy. He seemed so sure that he planned everything from the paint on your cheek to the “flirting” that took place at the game. You had doubted his methods right until Josh tells you to wash that stupid paint off your face.

“Make me.”

Those two words are enough to make your sweet little nerd snap.

Part of you slightly regrets it, but the larger part doesn’t because you absolutely love it when he’s rough and mean. Just like he’s being now as you’re sitting on his lap with nothing but your panties on.

“You’re such a fucking brat.” Joshua growls. His fingers are gripping the satin material of your panties so they’re pulled tautly and tightly against the throbbing flesh of your wet cunt.

“You think you’re cute flirting with that dumbass football player?” His words are punctured by another harsh tug to your underwear.

You shake your head, unable to believe your idiot friend was actually right. “Juh-Josh!”

He pulls you closer and gently nips at your jaw while his other hand keeps pulling at your underwear. Josh is entirely captivated with the way your swollen lips swallow the damp fabric. He smiles wolfishly when you start to tremble against him. It’s not long after that you feel the coil in your stomach snap, moaning loudly as you gush all over Josh’s jean-clad thigh.

But he’s hardly done. Joshua grips your hips and starts grinding your clothed cunt against his leg. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as the overstimulation starts to become too much for you. Still, it’s not enough. It will never be enough until he splits you open on his cock. And he knows this, which is why he won’t give you what you want until he’s satisfied with your begging.

“Shua, please!” You whine pathetically. “Just fuck me already!”

This finally seems to be enough for him because soon a enough you find your face pressed against the mattress with Josh’s cock ramming into your sensitive cunt. A stinging swat comes down onto your arcing ass that’s already burning from the slaps he delivered to you earlier. It makes you moan out stupidly.

“What’s that?” His chuckle is cruel. “Did I already fuck you stupid?”

His hands are on your hips, forcing you back on to his cock roughly. The tip of his cock is slamming against your g-spot, and he groans when your walls squeeze his cock until you’re creaming on him for the second time.

Josh moans along with you as his cock keeps ravaging your tight little pussy. The euphoric feeling of his thick cock throbbing deep inside you with every languid stroke makes your creamy cunt squeeze him again as if it doesn’t want him to disconnect.

“Fuck, Y/N!” He moans as his hot cum spills inside you.

Another sharp strike connects with the globe of your ass. His large hand spread your cheeks as he roughly fucks his cum back into your sopping hole. Josh’s thrust abruptly slow, and for a second you think he’s done, but he only flips you over so his chest is pressed against yours.

A carnal heat clouds Josh’s mind when he sees your fucked out face gazing up at him. He starts fucking his cock back into your battered cunt.

“More.” You mewl, lifting you hips to meet his thrusts.

“That’s it, baby.” Josh growls as his cock plunges in and out of you, filling his room with a lewd squelching sound. “Beg for this fucking cock.”

The sharp buck of his strong hips clashing against your own forces your body to jolt upward at the rough contact. Josh fucks into your pussy as mercilessly as he can, desperate to have you think of him and only him.

All you can feel is his fat cock ramming into your insides, and you’re so fucking glad that you listened to Mingyu. “Don’t stop!”

“You’re squeezing me so tightly.” Josh sighs dreamily. “So perfect for me.”

“I-I’m gonna come.” You whimper as he starts pounding into you faster and harder than before.

His cock is so deep inside you, and you love every moment of it. You’ll never get enough.

“Mingyu can’t fuck you like this.” Josh suddenly growls as his pace reaches a new level of fast. “Only I can because this sweet cunt is all mine, right?”

You can only moan in response, eyes shutting tightly from the overwhelming amount of pleasure of Josh fucking into you. “All yours, baby. Only yours.”

Your words trigger both your orgasms, the only sound that can be heard in the room is his heavy balls slapping against your ass as he fills you with his sticky cum. That emotion from before settles in his chest as you cling to him, refusing to let go.

Josh presses a gentle kiss to your temple, suddenly overwhelmed with emotion.

“Stay here tonight.” His whisper is soft as his arms tighten around you. “Please.”

Your heart clenches after hearing how desperate and vulnerable Josh sounds. Maybe it’s wishful thinking or post-sex bliss, but it makes an inexplicable warmth spread throughout your body. You gently run your nails along the nape of his neck before softly caressing his hair. “Okay.” You agree in a whisper. “I’ll stay.”

It simultaneously relieves and frustrates Josh that you don’t seem to notice how much affection he actually has for you despite being wrapped up in each other’s arms. Fleetingly, he considers telling you about the feelings consuming him, but he ultimately decides against it.

There’s always next time, after all.

“—heard Mingyu is going to confess to Y/N.”

Josh nearly trips over his feet when he’s walking to his next class and he catches the last part of a stranger’s conversation. It’s crazy for him to stop the random guy and demand to know how he knew this information. It’s even crazier for him to ditch his class to go to the spot the stranger mentions you and Mingyu are at.

He doesn’t remember the last time he ran this much or this fast. His lungs are burning, but he can’t care about that right now. Not when that stupid jock has you all alone with the intention of asking you out.

There’s a terrible jerk in his chest when he sees you and Mingyu together outside the library. You two are talking casually, and Josh’s mind is clouded with a feeling he vaguely acknowledges as jealousy. He won’t allow Kim Mingyu to confess to you at such a sacred place. Our place, he angrily thinks.

“Y/N.” Joshua says as calmly as he can once he’s close enough. “What are you doing?”

It’s a question that throws you off because you specifically remember mentioning that you were going to work on a project with a friend. He had been chill about it, even going as far as to invite you over after his last class of the day was over. The real question is what was he doing? You’ve never known Josh to skip out on any classes, and you weren’t sure why he was choosing now of all moments to do so.

“Mingyu and I—”

“Were having a private discussion.” Mingyu cuts in with a smirk that makes you want to smack him. “Do you mind?”

You knew you should’ve never confided in him with the feelings you harbored for Josh, but it’s too late to pout about drunken mistakes. Now he was going to try to stir shit up, and by the look Josh was giving him, it was working.

“I do.” Joshua seethes. “I need to talk to my girlfriend about something.”

It was more than likely that you had the dumbest look on your face at that moment. You can’t seem to hear anything other than the loud thrumming of your heart. It’s fluttering so hard that you feel like it might fly out of your chest at any moment.

You’ve known Mingyu long enough to know what he’s thinking. Despite the fact that Josh probably couldn’t beat him in a fight, you know the look he’s giving Mingyu had him feeling a bit intimidated. And yet, your idiot friend still sees no reason to stop his antics.

“Really?” Mingyu says through a laugh. “That’s funny because Y/N never mentioned that you two are going out. Since when have you been her boyfriend?”

“Since she took my virginity!”

Mingyu’s smirk slowly fades as he looks between you two with his mouth dropped open. You, on the other hand, feel like your eyes can’t get any wider. Heat burns your face as you realize that instead of being embarrassed or flustered, Josh is glaring at your friend with a challenging look in his eye. He makes no attempt to backtrack from his words, and it’s actually kind of embarrassing that you’ve never found him hotter than you did at this moment.

“Oh… okay.” Mingyu murmurs sheepishly as he brings his hand to rub the back of his neck. “My fault, bro. I didn’t know.”

It’s almost funny how this giant football player gets so flustered at the mention of sex when you know he sleeps with some random at least once a week. You don’t get a chance to laugh because I’m the next second, Josh’s large hand is grabbing your smaller one and guiding you away from Mingyu.

The walk back to his apartment is silent and a bit tense, but you two don’t make a move to let go of each other’s hand.

Once you two are inside his room, Josh finally releases your hand and turns his shining eyes on you. There’s a thick tension between you two, but oddly enough, you don’t mind it. You usually never mind anything when it comes to Joshua Hong.

“So, when were you planning on telling me that we’ve been dating this entire time?” You wonder with a slight tilt of your head.

“I…” Josh feels his bravado from before slip away. “I didn’t plan to tell you about my feelings this way.”

He takes a deep breath and soldiers through the nerves eating away at him. “I like you, Y/N. More than I’ve ever liked anyone. It was stupid of me to try and deny it this entire time.”

It’s hard not to feel like you’re in the middle of a beautiful dream. To see Josh’s sparkling eyes looking at you with unadulterated affection makes the carnal heat in your mind snap. You grab the front of his shirt and pull him against you to press your lips against his.

The familiarity of your sweet lips on his puts Josh at ease. His movements are eager and tender, tongue grazing past your lips. Hearing you whimper makes him feel dazed and drunk.

When your hands brush against his growing bulge, Josh exhales shakily. Of course he has to give in to your unspoken request and starts to take off his clothes. It’s like second nature by this point, and before you know it, he has you spread out on his bed with his tongue shoved inside your hot cunt.

“I’ll never get tired of tasting this sweet pussy.” Josh groans, licking and sucking at your puffy clit.

Your nails graze his scalp as you shove his face deeper into your dripping cunt, desperate for release. “Feels so good, baby.”

The way you’re clenching around his tongue makes him smirk. You feel tight even on his tongue, and he can’t wait to feel you around his dick.

“You gonna come for me, pretty girl?” Josh asks with an impossibly wide smirk as your cunt sporadically clenches around his tongue. He spits on your cunt before lapping at it again, loving the loud moans you let out.

He doesn’t stop his movements until you come on his tongue. Like a starved man, he laps up every last drop of your release. Josh sits up, the remnants of your arousal covering his chin. The sight is so hot that you push him on his back and climb on top of him. You grip his cock before fully sinking down on it with a guttural moan.

“Fuck.” Josh whimpers.

You start to bounce on top of him, moaning wantonly as you feel the tip hit a spot inside you that has you seeing stars. Joshua grips your lower back and rolls you into him to help you ride his cock. His teeth gently graze one of your nipples before he takes it in his mouth. The way he licks and nips at it makes your cunt clench down on his aching cock tighter. He loves how you’re squeezing him.

“Fucking love your cock!” You moan as you start to roughly buck your hips into his.

Joshua releases your nipple with a pop and focuses on making you come again. He angles his hips just right so the fat tip of his dick slams against your cervix as he starts to fuck up into you. The action is repeated until you’re creaming around his cock. That’s all it takes for him to shoot ropes and ropes of hot cum inside your sensitive cunt.

“I’ll never get enough of you.” He says as he gently pants into your neck.

You smirk at him, as his dick twitches inside you. “Prove it.”

taglist: @duolingofanaccount @felix-3002 @junhui-recs @asjkdk @dani41 @kageyama-i-want-tobiors @ohwonwoo

#svthub #joshua hong smut #svt smut #svt x you #svt x reader #svt imagines #joshua hong x reader #joshua hong x you #seventeen x you #seventeen smut #seventeen x reader #joshua hong imagines #seventeen imagines

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bellaxgiornata · 7 months

Text

Break the Tension [Chapter Two: "The Rehearsal Dinner"]

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader Word Count: 3.7k

[Full summary and series chapter list can be found here.]

Warnings/tags: 18+; Enemies to lovers, sexual tension, smut, semi-public sex, light angst

a/n: So this fic won the poll for which one I'll update today! I also feel like this part really sets the tone for this series... Feedback is always appreciated!

Tag list: @mattkinsella @danzer8705 @pazii @paracosmic-murdock @xxdrixx

It had been years since Matt had last been around you. Graduation day at Columbia, to be exact. And yet from the moment you'd stepped into Fairfield Manor and made your way down the hallway towards him with Marci at your side, he'd known one thing remained true.

You still drove him absolutely crazy.

Though not in the way you'd probably always thought. Matt truthfully never meant to be the way he was with you–harsh and teasing–but for some reason every time he got the taste of your pheromones on his tongue, his sexual frustration came out in the sharp way he spoke to you. He figured it was a sort of defense mechanism, one he hadn't initially meant to implement. Especially since it made him feel like a ridiculous school boy pulling his crush's ponytail because he couldn't just use his words.

Matt had picked up on your physical attraction to him from the very first day you both had met in the lecture for Critical Legal Thought. And back then, he'd always been terrified that if he flirted with you–even just a little bit–and you became the least bit aroused around him, he'd lose his mind completely. He didn't think he could handle the smell of your arousal mingled with your natural pheromones, not without pathetically throwing himself at you in Columbia's hallways. So he'd been crass and rude instead, still craving your attention but unable to handle you being further attracted to him. But to his surprise, you always held your own against him, which somehow only made you more attractive to him.

But for some damn reason when you'd shown up tonight, he'd found himself initially torn between wanting to keep you at a distance and wanting to finally have you. Admittedly he'd forgotten just how good you always smelled because no one else ever had quite the same effect on him. It was like your particular pheromones were crafted specifically to drive him wild.

You were Matt’s weakness and he so desperately wanted to be yours.

Earlier tonight, back at the venue for the rehearsal for tomorrow's ceremony, things had gone fairly uneventful after the initial interaction Matt’d had with you. Though he had noticed the way you'd reacted to his fingers barely grazing you below the hem of your dress. He had reveled in the way your skin had prickled with goosebumps, your heart accelerating in your chest as your face heated. His cock had stirred awake in his dress pants almost immediately, the faintest hint of your arousal hitting his nose and then his tongue. Your response had shown him that you still found him attractive, possibly even more than he remembered you being back in college, even if you still seemed incredibly annoyed by his presence.

But Matt didn’t care about that. He’d find a way to change your opinion of him this weekend, at least enough so that his presence didn’t frustrate you. Because knowing you still found him attractive after he’d gotten a taste of your pheromones once more ultimately had him deciding that he was going to pursue you over the course of the wedding weekend– relentlessly . Matt refused to end the weekend without ever having a taste of you. Without ever hearing the soft, breathy moans he always imagined you'd make when he dove between your thighs. Without feeling all the soft, sweet lines of your body beneath his fingers– and his tongue. Without burying himself deep inside of you, fucking you so tenaciously that you could barely hold onto him, clawing at him as your your smart mouth moaned his name instead of cursing it for once.

Fuck. If he kept thinking like this he'd be needing to excuse himself to the bathroom just to take care of himself in one of the stalls.

Shifting under the table, trying to alleviate the sudden uncomfortable strain of his dress pants against himself, he attempted to focus on his dinner. On either side of him sat Foggy’s brother along with a few of Foggy’s cousins that were also members of the bridal party, but directly across the table from him was you. And the scent of your perfume mixing with your pheromones wasn't helping his situation right now.

For most of the rehearsal dinner you'd been focused on your own food shortly after everyone had been seated and served. Though you’d chatted with the bridesmaids around you until Marci and Foggy’s parents had given their toasts before the meal. Oddly enough you didn't seem as conversational as he usually remembered you being tonight. Instead, you'd kept your head ducked over your plate, eating your food and occasionally responding to comments.

Frustrated because you’d stayed true to your earlier words, not making conversation with him anymore than you had to, Matt's foot slid forward underneath the table. He knew this would probably irritate you further with him, but he also didn’t know how else to catch your attention. Anytime he’d tried to start a conversation with you this evening, you’d answered in clipped replies, quickly pulling others around you into the conversation when possible so you wouldn't have to converse solely with him.

He noticed your foot tapping anxiously in your heels as he slid his dress shoe forward until it finally bumped against yours. Across the table you stiffened in your seat, your foot halting its movements instantly. Bringing his fork to his mouth, he slipped the bit of steak between his lips as his head rose, his covered gaze focusing on you as he chewed. He could hear the tension growing in your muscles as your head rose marginally from the table, probably looking at him from across it and wondering if that had been an accident. Seconds later your foot slid a few inches backwards from his and resumed its anxious tapping.

Swallowing down the bite of food, Matt’s resolve didn’t disappear. He cut off another piece of his steak, spearing it with his fork and slowly drawing it up to his mouth. At the same time, he slid his foot forward again, bumping his into yours for a second time. This time he heard the way your hand tightened around your fork, your head rising up fully as you looked at him from across the table. He sent you a smirk before he took another bite from his fork.

“Goddamit, Murdock,” he heard you mutter under your breath.

His smirk only grew wider as he chewed, his focus on you while the rest of the table remained oblivious to the silent interaction. Though in that moment, Matt would’ve given anything to hear you moaning out his first name instead while he felt your cunt tightening around his cock.

Entering your room in an irritated huff, you closed and locked the door behind yourself. For a few minutes all you could do was pace the room in frustration, walking back and forth as you ran your fingers through your hair.

Matt had gotten under your skin and you hadn’t even been here a full day yet. And tonight Marci and Foggy were having a fire out in the courtyard for anyone who wanted to join them for the evening. You’d wanted to go, hoping to catch up with some of the girls you’d met through Marci and become friends with over the years, but the thought of running into Matt and dealing with his strange and annoying flirtatious teasing had you considering staying in tonight.

You didn’t understand what had gotten into him. He must’ve heard from someone after graduation that you’d once drunkenly called him attractive and he was now trying to make you admit it. Either that or he’d found out and figured it would be funny to tease you because of it, to make you think that you could ever draw his attention. Either way, you weren’t thrilled with his unwelcome flirting.

But that weird game of footsie he was trying to rope you into at dinner had been so odd. It was almost as if he knew how much it was making you mad. Which was strange considering he couldn’t see your reaction each time he touched his foot to yours.

With a sigh you told yourself you needed to stop thinking about Matt for the evening. You’d just stay in your room, clean off your face, and maybe get to bed early. That way you’d be rested for tomorrow. Admittedly the couple of glasses of wine from dinner were making you a little tired, anyway.

Heading back towards your bed, you picked up the clutch purse you’d brought with you to the restaurant. Opening it up, you reached inside for your phone, but your fingertips only brushed along your lipstick, your ID, and your debit card. Panic shooting through you, you opened the clutch wider and peered inside. Your phone wasn’t there.

A surge of fear raced through you as you tried to recall when you’d last had it. You know you’d used it at the rehearsal dinner tonight, but you could’ve sworn that you had put it back into your purse before you’d left. With a groan you realized you must have left it somewhere at the restaurant, which meant you were now going to have to borrow someone’s phone to call a ride back there just to pick it up.

“Great,” you grumbled to yourself.

Two brisk knocks at your bedroom door startled you, causing you to jump on the spot as the sound broke through your thoughts. Turning, you made your way over towards the door, wondering who it could be and also hoping they had a phone you could borrow. But when you unlocked and opened the door, you were vexed to see Matt standing there in the hallway. That stupid smirk was on his mouth again, too.

"What the hell do you want, Murdock?" you ground out. "I'm sort of in the middle of something right now."

"Oh?" he asked, his brows rising up high over his glasses. "Is something wrong?"

"Nothing that concerns you," you answered.

Peering around him in the hall, you searched for signs of anyone else you could ask to borrow a phone from. Unfortunately the hall was entirely empty except for Matt.

"Well, does the something wrong happen to do with you accidentally leaving your phone at the restaurant?" he asked.

Your attention swiftly returned to him, watching as he reached into the inside pocket of his suit coat and slid your phone from within it. Relief flooded you instantly at the sight of it, a soft sigh escaping you. Though when that smirk grew on his lips at the sound of your relief, your left hand balled into a fist at your side. You didn’t like that he was pleased at having helped you.

"Heard you'd left it on the table from one of the bridesmaids," he explained. "So I offered to bring it back to you, considering we have rooms next to each other."

"How very gallant, Murdock. Thank you," you said in a clipped tone, accepting the phone from his outstretched hand. "But now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get ready for bed."

Before you could close the door more than an inch, Matt’s hand darted forward. Your eyes widened in shock, staring at his large palm as it spread wide over the wooden door, halting its movements.

"You aren't going to the fire tonight?" he asked, head tilting curiously to the side. "With everyone else?"

“If it means interacting with you? No, I’m not,” you replied bitterly. “Can you please let go of my door now? I think we’re done here.”

Matt said your name, the sound of it coming out low and sultry from his lips. Your hand gripped the door tighter in response, your eyes fixed to the red lenses of his glasses. It was as if his voice had suddenly put you in a trance and you couldn’t look away from him, your heart speeding up just a little faster in your chest.

“Why don’t you just admit it?” he questioned softly, taking a slow, calculated step into your room. “Just admit you want me. That you’ve always wanted me.”

Brows jumping up onto your forehead in surprise, your mouth fell partially open. Taken so off guard by his words and his boldness, you didn’t have the chance to stop him from further entering your room. Blinking rapidly a few times in shock, you took a step back from his imposing form passing through your door. Someone must have told him that you’d once drunkenly admitted to finding him attractive and now he was being an asshole about it. That had to have been the reasoning for his behavior so far.

“I’ve always thought you were a conceited asshole, actually,” you shot back.

You hoped he hadn’t caught the tremble in your voice as he continued to close the small distance between you both. For some reason you found him more attractive than usual advancing on you like he was; you couldn’t exactly explain why it was beginning to turn you on. He looked intimidating and strong with those broad shoulders tugging at his suit coat, the buttons of his dress shirt pulling beneath his tie which was askew along his chest. He looked good–better than he ever did at Columbia–but you did not want to be feeling that way. Not for Matthew Murdock. Because he was an asshole .

“And I think you should go,” you ordered, finding your voice again.

“Is that what you really want?” he asked, voice dropping an octave to something deeper as he took another step towards you. “Because I’m not buying it, sweetheart.”

Matt continued to gradually stalk towards you, one hand reaching out behind himself and pushing your door closed. It shut with a soft thump and your heart stuttered in your chest at the sound. Because you were alone with him in your room now, and for some reason that was having an effect on you that you’d rather never admit to him.

“I think,” he continued in that gravelly, deep tone, “that you’ve always wanted to know what it would be like with me.”

“That’s what you think, is it?” you questioned weakly.

“Mmm,” he hummed out, lips curling upwards. “Mhmm.”

Unable to move, your eyes fixed on his smirking lips, Matt closed the remaining distance between the pair of you. His hands very gently landed on your hips and your breath hitched in response, catching in your throat under his touch. In all the years you’d known Matt in college, he’d never once touched you. Not once. Not until that brief graze of his fingertips along your thigh earlier at the rehearsal. But right now it felt like the heat from his fingers were searing into your skin beneath the thin fabric of your dress, burning you from the inside out. It felt far too good, especially when his hands tightened further on your hips, gripping them more firmly as he balled your dress in his fists, pulling the fabric higher up.

Still transfixed by his face, you could see the sharp flare of his nostrils as he repeatedly expelled harsh breaths from his nose, his chest lightly heaving each time. His bottom lip was caught between his teeth as his head tilted to the side, almost like he was studying you in the silence that had fallen. Even behind the dark lenses of his glasses that he wore you could see that he was focused on you.

And that’s when a thought struck you as you took in the sight of him, trying to keep your knees from quivering at his proximity. He didn’t seem like he was remotely teasing you right now. This didn’t feel like the Matthew Murdock you’d known in college who’d taunted you and made jabs at you. He wasn’t here doing any of that.

No, it seemed like he genuinely wanted you.

Something stirred low within you at the thought, a heat beginning to grow inside of you. One you’d never anticipated when it came to this particular man, no matter how attractive you’d found him over the years. Because he’d always been such an asshole to you. But yet…

“Except,” you found yourself saying, surprising even yourself with the way your tongue had been loosened by the glasses of wine you’d had with dinner, “I’m pretty sure it's the other way around. Because looking at you right now, Murdock, I’d say you’re the one who wants to know what it would be like with me.”

You saw the moment his jaw clenched, the muscle jumping agitatedly in his cheek. He bit down harder on his bottom lip, his shoulders tensing at your voice.

A jolt of curiosity sparked inside of you at his reaction, your nerves dissipating. Had that been it all along? Had Matthew Murdock actually wanted you back then? Was that why he was being an asshole to you now, coming into your room uninvited and making these flirtatious advances? Because he still wanted you?

Oh that was an unexpected twist indeed. One you were going to enjoy in more ways than one this weekend. Because maybe you’d thought about fucking Matt in college, back before he’d become quite so mean to you that you couldn’t bear the sight of him, but now you considered taking what you wanted from him. Maybe you’d find out if he really was as great in bed as everyone praised him to be, but that’s all you’d do. Take what you wanted from him. And you weren’t going to make this easy on him in the slightest–he was far too cocky to begin with.

Consider it payback , you thought. You beautiful asshole .

When he hadn’t denied your comment outright, you figured now was as good a time as any to test your theory. You took a step closer to Matt, leaving the pair of you now only inches apart. Immediately you heard a rumbling within his chest at the movement, the noise something almost animalistic that sent a shudder straight up your spine. A pleased smile grew wide across your lips when he fisted the fabric of your dress even tighter in his hands.

“I’m right, aren’t I?” you murmured, tilting your face up towards his. “Tell me, Murdock,” you whispered, bringing your mouth closer to his as you spoke, “how often did you think about fucking me?”

“You’ve got a mouth on you, sweetheart,” Matt shot back.

“And how often have you thought about it on you, hmm?” you countered.

Matt’s bottom lip rolled out from beneath his teeth, his lips twitching as they thinned out along his face. It looked like he was struggling before you, torn between making a snarky comeback or fighting the urge to kiss you. Especially with how you’d leaned up towards him, your mouth only the slightest distance from his. You could feel his warm breath brushing over your lips as you stood there, the rush of adrenaline from having such an unexpected effect on him easily going to your head–and your cunt.

Almost as if in slow motion, Matt dove forward to press his mouth to yours, but you abruptly stepped back from him. He immediately froze in place, head canting to the side as his dark brows knitted together beneath his glasses. His lips pressed firmly together as his expression shifted to one of confusion, and the sight left you grinning in satisfaction once again.

Reaching out, you placed your hand against Matt’s chest, noticing the way his lips parted and a faint whine barely spilled out between them. With a gentle push, you nudged him backwards. Surprised, Matt stumbled back a step, his hands releasing their hold on your dress. The fabric unbunched, sliding back down your legs.

“I’m not going to kiss you, Murdock,” you stated.

“Oh come on, you clearly want to,” he snapped. “I may be blind, but I can’t be the only one seeing the sexual tension here. Just admit you want me. That you want me to bend you over your bed and fuck you senseless here and now.”

Eyes narrowing, you shook your head. “No,” you answered.

“No?” he questioned, surprised.

“No,” you repeated. “I don’t want that, Murdock.”

He huffed out a laugh, that stupid, smug smirk spreading back across his lips. “Now, I’m not going to believe that for a second.”

“Believe what you want, sweetheart ,” you replied, tone intentionally condescending, “but if you want me, you’re going to have to beg for it.”

Matt openly scoffed, shaking his head as he let out a humorless laugh. “Absolutely not. I’m certainly not one to beg, and I sure as hell won’t beg for you ,” he ground out. “You’ll change your mind real soon, sweetie. I can tell you want me. Then you’ll be the one coming to beg me to fuck you and it’ll be that much sweeter .”

“Tell yourself whatever you want,” you told him. “Just do it out of my room that your desperate ass barged into. I need to get ready for that fire.”

He pulled a face at your words, his mouth opening and closing for a moment. The sight almost had you laughing but you bit your tongue, trying to fight it back. He somehow looked even more confused.

“I–I thought you said you weren’t going to that?” he asked.

“I changed my mind,” you answered with a shrug. “Might be fun to watch you squirm now that I know what you’re really after.”

Matt shook his head, turning around and heading back towards your door. You almost offered to help him as he felt around in front of himself for a second, but then he’d grabbed the door handle and twisted it open. He took a step out into the hall, grabbing his cane that he must’ve rested against the wall out in the hallway. Before he left, he turned over his shoulder back towards you.

“You have absolutely no idea what I’m after,” he told you.

You watched as Matt unfolded his cane, making his way next door to his own room. Standing in the middle of your room, you were left staring out of the open door wondering what the hell he’d meant by that.

#matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock smut #matt murdock angst #matt murdock

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