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#it's not like it'd be easier to make myself or my OC??

akumicchi · 13 days

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𝔗𝔬 𝔟𝔢 𝔥𝔢𝔞𝔯𝔡.

112 prayers

A hopeful message with no destination.

You will never be too heavy for me.

Content: angst, breakdown, hints of depression. Suguru's POV. OC appearance.

I smelled it before I saw it. I felt it before I heard it; the presence, the humming. I had never entertained the idea of time travel. No one could actually predict a forced turn in the highway of time, even if Back to the Future made it look so comical. Despite that, I found myself basking in that presence, in that humming, and let it drive me off to when I was a child: innocent and safe.

“Mom?”, hoarse. Silence. A knot of guilt tightened itself up inside my chest. ‘Don’t go’.

“Sorry, did I wake you up?”, there weren't the walls of my room around me, no posters, no bookshelves nor pictures. In fact, there was no room at all. Just an open field I didn't know, somewhere I couldn't remember. I wasn't curled against my mother either. It was just Hogo, and it made me more at ease than expected.

Not being alert in a strange place was a punch to my instincts, but I couldn't bring myself to care aside from a simple:

“Where are we?”

“We’re at school. I carried you here, remember?”, oh yes. She and her stupidly strong arms. “You fell asleep though, so you probably don't”.

I did remember not wanting to come, earlier that day. The air had felt like lead for the entire … month?, weighing heavy on my lungs with each breath. Every layer of clothing was a tight rope made of rubber. It didn't matter how much I tried to fight the dark clouds, they only grew thicker and tighter. It was exhausting. It'd be way easier to just give into the misery. ‘Ah… everyone would be so disappointed to see me like this, choosing the easy way. But I can't carry this and pretend anymore’. So I hid from sewing fake smiles on my face. I just wanted to drown in the pain without witnesses.

Despite that, I let her in.

“C'mon, I want to show you something.”

“I don't really feel like walking anywhere right now”, it had been four days since Tsukumo Yuki talked to me on that very bench, and left me with more thoughts than I could manage. I needed quiet. “Maybe next time”.

Hogo crouched in front of me. Her voice was soft, the one she used when talking to kids. “Please, it won't be long, I promise. We go and then we come back. You will like it”, her eyes were clouded with worry, she looked pretty like that too, “You don't even have to walk if you don't want to”.

“Hmm? How come? You can teleport now, too?”, I cocked a brow, feeling the slight tug of a smile against my will. ‘The things she makes me do’. Her hands closed and opened for a second. She wanted to hug me, and the realization of this loud and clumsy girl being so mindful around me made my chest ache.

“Well, I'll show you if you agree to come with me”, she sang quietly with a spray of confidence.

I was so eager to get an answer to these haunting questions. Haibara’s response was as simple as his own mind. Tsukumo Yuki’s, on the other hand… It was complicated. Or maybe it wasn't? Maybe I had made my choice? But what if I was wrong? How could I know? What would she say? I wanted her thoughts, a piece of her mind to tell me…anything.

‘But not now’. The scent from her neck lulled my senses quiet. The tree leaves above our heads were kind enough to shield us from the summer afternoon. Hogo’s hand traced my skin, untangling my worries stroke by stroke. My legs were folded on her lap, and the vague memory of being cradled this way made me feel so innocent. Too warm to think. Too soft. Too comfortable.

She had a book propped up against my thigh. It was open roughly around the middle.

“What are you reading?”

“112 prayers at midnight”, she hummed, eyes not leaving the pages.

“That's an odd number of prayers”.

“Yeah. It's a story about a non-believer trapped in a time loop trying to save his loved ones after losing them to a mistake… He prays every time for the loop to restart.”

“For a non believer he surrendered fast… At least he has a second chance”.

Silence settled between us. A few seconds later she spoke again.

“Hum, I thought about that too, ‘To pray for time to go back, it's so unfair’. But as twisted as it is, I just can't stop reading. Maybe I'll be surprised”.

“Who’s that god that answers at the first call? That's a real surprise. I'd like to meet him”, that was a slip. My throat tightened and by no means I expected how broken I actually sounded.

Her arms held me closer. When she pressed her lips against my forehead, a sob almost broke through every wall I had built.

“Me too”.

Stop being like this. Don't hold me, don't carry me somewhere calm, don't kiss me so softly. Stop making me feel so small! I don't want the sun, I don't want the breeze, I don't want clouds, or words, or songs, or flowers; I don't want any of it!!

“Shh… it's okay, I've got you”.

#jjk x reader #jjk geto #jjk suguru #jjk fanfic #jjk geto suguru #jjk suguru geto #jjk angst #jjk #jujutsu geto #jujutsu suguru #jujutsu angst #jujutsu sorcerer #jujutsu kaisen suguru #jujutsu kaisen geto #jujutsu kaisen angst #jujutsu kaisen comfort #tw depressing thoughts

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allmoshnobrain · 3 months

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𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐫

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

part 29 of 35 | masterpost

word count: 2563 | ao3 link | fic's playlist

I wasn't ready for any of that. The wounds from losing Dave were still too raw, to the point that acknowledging the desire I felt for James made my heart tighten with regret. What the hell was I thinking? I'd chosen Dave. And yet, he’d left me. What I wanted didn't mean shit in changing anything. How could I want anything from James when the very feeling I had for him had wrecked everything I held dear?

✦ summary: After reuniting with her friends, Nore is compelled to confront the conflicting feelings she still harbors for James.

✦ on this chapter: dave mustaine x female!oc, james hetfield x female! oc, oc is cliff's cousin, +18, language, slice of life, angst, love triangle

✦ a/n: Hello! I've talked about this previously on my blog, but as we're headed into the last stretch of the story, I would like everyone to know: while the next few chapters are gonna dive into James and Nore's feelings a bit more, Dave will be back! His story with Nore isn't over yet. Also, we'll have an epilogue that is still on the works. I've wrapped up the main part of the story and I'm hosting a poll to see if you guys prefer I keep posting new chapters once a week or if you're up for me posting them twice a week. If anyone wants to vote, here's the link. Hope you enjoyed the read, any feedback is welcome! 🖤

✧ There's something hanging in the air, I won't say shit 'cause I'm too scared / I'll just pretend we're two lovers not destroying each other / And you don't want me to go, and I just can't say no ✧

I met with Cliff and the guys at Los Angeles airport a few days later. I have to admit, the idea of reuniting with my friends after all those weeks left me a bit on edge, and not fully in a good way. However, catching up with Cliff and Leanne, and then with Kirk and Lars, did ease some of that tension. On the flip side, seeing Pat and James hanging out together didn't really help my state of mind. I couldn't help but wonder how, in just two months, they had become so close that she got an invitation to join the tour. Then it hit me with a pang in my heart that I hadn't needed much more than that to fall completely in love with Dave after meeting him.

I didn't really chat it up much with James. Seeing him with Pat kinda brought back all the wounds from that rainy weekend a few months back. But, he did give me a hug the moment he spotted me, holding onto me for maybe a beat longer than needed before whispering, his lips right by my ear:

"Missed you so much."

Hearing that sure didn't make things easier.

Seeing the guys all pumped up about the trip gave my mood a little boost. None of them, except Lars and me, had done the whole international travel thing before. The flight to Amsterdam was gonna be a marathon, so I had plenty of time to catch up with Leanne, who picked the seat next to mine. We mainly talked about everything that had happened in San Francisco during my absence; Leanne didn't ask much about me, which I was genuinely thankful for. It was nice having her around, but I wasn't really up for diving into how the last few months had been a rough ride. We kept the chatter going deep into the night until fatigue finally caught up with us, and we crashed.

We rolled into Amsterdam about twelve hours later, and man, we were wiped. Headed straight to the hotel, and lucky for us, the producers only snagged double rooms. Since we had an odd number and sharing a bed with Kirk or Lars wasn't my jam, I lucked out with a double bed all to myself. Honestly, better than I thought it'd be.

When night crept in, the guys and Leanne hit the town for some drinks and city exploring. Pat and I, though, opted for a chill night in, catching a few movies on the TV. Not that I wasn't up for hitting the streets, but all the hours spent on the plane did a number on me, more than I expected. Pat called it a night and went back to her room early, but I left the TV humming in the background, not really paying much attention to what was on.

It was well past midnight when I heard some heavy footsteps echoing down the hallway. My curiosity kicked in as a few deliberate knocks hit my door, and I pondered for a moment, debating whether I should bother answering. But the knocks persisted, and my curiosity won out. With a sigh, I rose from my spot and opened the door. My heart quickened when I found James leaning casually against the door frame.

"Mind if I come in?" he asked, a faint smile playing on his lips, though his voice betrayed a touch of uncertainty. I sighed, feeling warmth spread across my face. Having him so close made my heart flutter in a way I hadn't experienced in a while.

"This isn't your room," I mumbled, stupidly, my ability to think straight suddenly on vacation. He chuckled softly, a quick, dry laugh.

"If you hadn't said anything, I would never have guessed. Can I come in or not?"

I hesitated but eventually stepped aside, letting him in and closing the door. He stretched, shrugged off his jacket, and tossed it on my bed before settling down, kicking off his shoes. I furrowed my brow.

"You should head back to your room. Pat's probably waiting for you."

"She can wait," he said, finishing up with his shoes and pulling out a hair tie from his pocket, using it to secure his hair into a ponytail. Oddly, the sight made him even more attractive. I couldn't help but wonder if the hair tie belonged to Pat, who would often wear her hair tied up, and if he was picking up some habits from his new girlfriend. He stood up, seeming totally oblivious to my thoughts, and casually opened the mini-fridge, grabbing a Coke and popping it open. Then, he lifted his serious blue eyes to me. "I wanted to see you."

"Why?" I questioned, feeling my face warm up and my heart race, a million butterflies in my stomach going wild at his words. He sighed, a faint bitter smile playing on his lips.

"I missed you," he said, his voice low. "Last time we met, everything went south. I thought you hated me. Yet, when I saw you today, Nore..."

"James, please stop," I murmured, my voice trembling. He furrowed his brow, looking away, seeming hurt by my words, and I felt my heart squeeze uncomfortably in my chest. "You shouldn't be saying that."

"Oh, really?" He stood up, placing the can he was holding on the table before coming closer. I took a step back, feeling my face burn as I caught the storm brewing in his blue eyes. "And why’s that?"

"You have a girlfriend, don’t you?" I questioned, my voice holding accusation and hurt. "You brought your fucking girlfriend, so maybe you should just head back to her..."

"You make it sound so simple," he growled, taking another step closer, prompting me to lift my head to meet his gaze.

"And isn’t it?" I shot back, my tone bitter. "How aren't you ashamed of this?"

"Ashamed of what? Of bringing the girl I started dating to try forgetting about you?" he scoffed, clearly pissed now. "Tell me, Nore, what was I supposed to do? Just watch you reject me, again, and again, and again, and then act like you loved me just to mess with my head?"

"This isn’t fair to her!" I blurted out, all worked up, my voice getting louder. "This isn’t fair to me!"

"And what about me? Is it fair what you're pulling on me?"

"I don't get why you thought bringing her along was a genius move..."

"It didn't have to be genius. When you bailed on LA, I called you for days. You were the one who wanted nothing to do with me."

"You're such a jerk!" I spat out, my irritation cranking my voice up more than would be okay for past midnight, but honestly, I'd stopped caring about that ages ago.

James growled, getting suddenly closer, gripping my waist with one hand and pulling me against his body, forcing me to look deep into his eyes as he pressed his forehead against mine, his breathing erratic. His other hand cupped my cheek, his thumb tracing my lower lip. All the anger I had seemed to spill over at that moment; I wanted to punch him, to kick him out, to yell I never wanted to see him again, but I couldn't. Not when his lips were inches away from mine, his blue eyes locking onto mine with a fiery passion that made my whole body warm and vibrate inside.

"You fucking love me," he murmured, a smug smile slowly creeping across his lips. "Things would be so much easier if you just admitted it."

"Shut up, James," I growled, my heart doing a sprint in my chest, blood pulsing with fury in my ears, my hands clutching the front of his shirt and yanking him towards me. I needed him to split; I didn't know how much longer I could trust my anger to hold back the temptation of surrendering to his arms.

"Tell me you don't love me, then," he said, throwing in a sarcastic laugh. "Say you don't love me, and I’ll forget all this and leave you alone. You can't, can you? Because you fucking love me, damn it," His words buzzed with almost unrestrained joy, his grip on my waist tightening enough for me to let out a muffled moan from between my lips. Damn, I wanted him to kiss me. For the first time since all that mess had started, I wanted him to kiss me, to touch me, to make me forget my own name.

"Leave," I shot back, the defiance in my voice wavering as I sensed his body against mine. He let out a low chuckle but stepped back, his eyes ablaze, a smug smile on his face. I rested one of my hands on my chest, feeling my heart thudding against my fingertips, and noticed I was shaking. Gripping the doorknob with my other hand, I turned it but hesitated to open the door. "Just... Go, James. Please," I whispered, the adrenaline of the moment wearing off, and the old pain flooding back to fill my chest as my eyes welled up with tears.

James seemed to catch onto my shift in mood, the triumph in his eyes giving way to pity when he noticed my tears building up. That sparked a rage in my chest; I didn't need his pity. I didn't need anyone's pity.

He made a move to come closer, but I just shook my head, turning away as I opened the door. After he left, I leaned against the closed door, letting myself slide down to sit on the floor, hugging my knees to my chest, feeling more alone, confused, and guilty than ever.

I woke up the next morning, feeling like I hadn't caught a wink of sleep. I groaned my way out of bed, pausing only to wash my face, brush my teeth, and swap outfits before heading down to the hotel's restaurant. There, I spotted Kirk, Lars, Cliff and Leanne already posted up at a table, digging into breakfast. I snagged a plate and plopped down next to Lars.

“After breakfast, we'll pack our bags and grab a shower. We're hitting the road after the show for the next city, so tonight, we’re all gonna be sleeping on the bus,” Cliff was laying out the plan when I rolled in.

“Great. Even crashing on a bus is cozier than sharing a bed with Lars,” Kirk griped, ignoring Lars' offended expression before shooting me a grin. “Hey, Nore, fancy bunking with me next time?”

"As if," I scoffed, and Lars burst into laughter.

"Hey, where's James?" Kirk asked, and I shrugged. Leanne bounced up to snag a hot cup of coffee, and Cliff sparked up a cigarette.

"Bet he's sleeping with Pat. Ever since they got together, she's been glued to him," Lars remarked, not looking too thrilled. Cliff snorted, rolling his eyes.

"Jealous, Lars?" I jokingly tossed the question while slathering butter on a piece of toast. He shot me a look, raising his eyebrows with a smirk.

"Hmm, not me. Can't say the same for you, though, huh?" His ironic smile lingered. I let out a frustrated huff, rolling my eyes, feeling the heat rising in my cheeks. Okay, maybe I walked right into that one.

A few minutes later, James and Pat finally strolled in. James, much like me, seemed to have had a rough night, evident in the dark circles under his tired blue eyes. On the flip side, Pat appeared to be the poster child for joy, easy smiles appearing on her lips as she talked to James, occasionally hugging his arm or intertwining her fingers with his. It was like she exuded confidence, as if she knew this was exactly where she belonged. Kind of got on my nerves, but I wasn't ready to dig into why.

The hustle for the show kicked off right after breakfast. We only had a short break to change and pack before heading back to the hotel lobby. A producer-arranged bus was set to pick us up, transporting everyone to a studio for the guys to rehearse the setlist during the day, and later to the venue for the shows. This leg of the journey got us all pumped. It wasn't just the band's inaugural international gig; we were also looking forward to meeting Venom and, naturally, enjoying some complimentary drinks. I must admit, even I was feeling a twinge of excitement and anxiety about the upcoming events.

I sparked up a cigarette while we hung out in front of the hotel, checking out the guys in action. They were teamed up with a couple of roadies, hauling gear that had been lugged up to the rooms the day before. Leanne strolled over.

"Got a light?" she asked, flashing a grin. I nodded, fished out my lighter, and passed it her way. She sparked up her cigarette, taking a few drags till it glowed. "Can I ask you something, Nore?"

"Sure thing, Lea," I replied, all curious. She shot me a look, her usual relaxed vibe getting a bit serious. Her eyes narrowed, like she was attempting to peek into my brain. "Spill it, what's on your mind?"

"How's it all sitting with you? You know, this whole James situation?" she asked, making me feel like there was a spotlight on me.

"James? What do you mean?" I stammered, feeling the heat hit my face. She let out a soft chuckle at my reaction.

"I'm seriously wondering how she hasn't picked up on it yet." Leanne nodded toward Pat; she was holding James’ hand and talking to Lars, who seemed bored out of his mind, like he'd rather be doing anything else. "The way he looks at you. And the way you look at him."

"What are you getting at?" I whispered, my heart doing a somersault of sorts in my chest.

"You're into him, right? And it's crystal he's into you. Maybe you two should ditch the pride act and just… Allow yourselves to be happy."

"But Pat likes him too," I mumbled, letting a touch of annoyance creep into my voice. And I still don't know if I can allow myself to like anyone again.

"Honestly? I think she's crushing harder on James Hetfield, the Metallica frontman, than our James," she said with a chuckle. "Babe, you and James always clicked so easy. You seriously gonna let that slip away like this?"

I was kind of stumped for a response; right then, the bus rolled up, stealing everyone's focus. Lea crushed her cigarette and shot me a smile, then sauntered over to Cliff, offering a hand with carrying an amp. I took a minute to soak in the sight before joining them, attempting to shove aside the tornado of feelings Leanne's words had kicked up in me.

✧ if you'd like to be tagged on the next parts, let me know and I'll add you to the tag list! ❤ ✧

tag list: @killazilla777 @whatsupvic @70srogah @genswine9

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psylunari · 2 months

Note

For the ship ask game: kunikidazai, suegiku, atsulucy

NOTE: the post will be long as heck. I'll keep reblogging for every ship addition till I finish.

I'll preface this by saying, yes! I do ship all of these!

Kunikidazai

(nervous chuckle) buckle up, buttercup.

1. What made you ship it?

TL;DR: ironically enough, writing it made them take over my brain.

Mid-tier answer: It wasn't one specific thing. I watched the show and had 1 (one) plot bunny one year later (my most-read BSD fic). I was writing a MHA OC/canon thing at the time. While passionate about that OC/canon, it was a difficult fic, and I put it on hold.

Writing that knkdz fic proved itself easier. It was flowing. It forced me into a deep dive in their dynamic. The result is what you see.

Long answer: it took me 10+ years in fandom (legit) to like m/m ships. So it's kinda hard?? To watch things with m/m tinted glasses. AKA deliberately looking for m/m chemistry, or interpreting it always that way, or making it up in my head if I can't find it. If I come across a ship, I came across a ship. And I'm the same for any ship.

During my first watch of bongo straycats, I didn't ship much of anything. I looked at those two and went, “yeah, they're haha funny, if I were to ship something it'd probably be this”. I was done with the three seasons out, then, I “forgot” BSD.

I mean. Not that I forgot. I was in-between fandom phases with other stuff. So I didn't pay “the popular ships” much mind. They were there. A thing that existed. I didn't care for them.

Then it went like:

“Hey, I could use some change in my life, lemme style my hair like this anime twink.” “Fic idea for haha funny ship. What if instead of disappearing to commit the die, the anime twink was sick and didn't tell anyone?” ?????? “It is a CRIME that THIS dynamic is on the unpopular side, I'm declaring myself in knkdz hell till further notice and will do something about it.”

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

TL;DR: they are multifaceted, their relationship is a deep rabbit hole of symbolism, and a blast to write about.

Superficial answer: complementary personalities + look good together + attractive + hilarious banter + suspicious moments + annoyances to lovers.

Heartfelt answer: I look at them from a complete perspective. Never one without the other, never caricatures of themselves. There's the caring domestic side, the dumb disagreements, the synergy and mutual respect, the defiance of internal values, the angst past and present… They are complex. The more you dig, the more you find. It's entertaining. It made the brain go brrrrr.

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

It isn't often I come across interpretations I disagree with. Dedicated knkdz shippers and I are mostly in the same wavelength. My unpopular opinion, however, boils down to “I interpret both as some flavor of bisexual, not gay” and “mischaracterization”.

Will elaborate on the latter.

On Kunikida: headcanon as the fandom might, IMO, this guy isn't confident about love and sex. Let alone super liberated.

Picture this. Inexperienced + perfectionist + “dear diary, today I dreamt of my perfect wife” + “do girls not like me because I'm a nerd?” = pretty romantic, huh? And out of touch with reality.

Don't get me wrong. He does have carnal desires or kinks, I feel. I see him as shy and easy to fluster in the beginning. He takes time to relax and do his thing, being his own biggest critic.

On Dazai: he isn't helpless and definitely has an edge. I have a catboy agenda to set. Think like a cat's claws. Can and will scratch if unhappy, they're part of him, do not declaw the catboy. The feetsies are soft and adorable. They're also a part of him.

In the love aspect: when he LIKES someone, Dazai goes “brain.exe has stopped working” and does/says the stupidest shit. I think he orbits them out of no idea how to deal with it. Staying in the same space, wanting closure, not asking for it. Literal cat behavior again.

Now, in sex matters, he's shameless for… the most part. Not vulnerable all the time. He can flirt when it's for meaningless flings. What IMO WOULD make him cry is emotional stuff. Which may be tied to a sexual moment. Just not necessarily.

#kunikidazai #kunidazai #kunizai #knkdz #kndz #kunikida x dazai #dazai x kunikida #国太 #太国 #bsd kunikida doppo #bsd dazai osamu #psyluna.ask

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skelleste · 4 months

Text

2023 Art Summary

Some of the many things I worked on over the past 365 days. More details below.

Happy New Year!

Just like last year, 2023 was full of even more character art, including a brand spanking new OC. You haven't seen much of the comic yet, because it's not done, but there's been progress on that in the background as well. I also started commissions last March. None are featured in this post so I could focus more on original art, but I wanted to give a special thank-you to all my past commissioners. Not a single one of you were a customer service nightmare, in fact it was quite the opposite. I appreciate everyone who's been kind enough to give me work and treat me well.

The rest of this post is going to be some of my favorite pieces by month, and a little about them. I usually spare my followers from most details in my posts, because there's often not much of interest to the public to say, so this is mostly self indulgent.

January

I decided to revisit Tom and Maudlin, as I hadn't drawn them much since creating them. Whenever I make a new character of importance, I try to go out of my way to put them in varied poses and expressions so that I am able to understand how their bodies work by the time I need them for a real project. It's also a great way to explore their personalities, although I feel that I'll have to push Tom's emotional side more in the future.

February

Props for the comic! It sucks to have to design things on the fly, so it helps to have notable objects designed beforehand. Especially if it's important to the plot. Some of these appear in more panels than others, but it smooths out the comic process nevertheless to have ample references on hand.

March

More character designs to spare me from designing mid-comic production. If they don't have lines in the comic, then I ask random people to assign names to them to make it fun, and because it's easier to keep straight who's who when they're not named Man 1 and Man 2. Left to right, they are Johnifer (you can already see why I name the ones with dialogue myself), Wanda, Jean Vincent, Booker, Charles, Maribelle, and Gertrude.

April

It'd be silly of me to pretend as if 90% of my output isn't shitposts. When you dedicate most of your art time to a project, then you're not going to end up making any other art unless you satisfy primitive monkey brain somehow. In my case, that's usually addressed by drawing funny shit. Early this year is when I discovered how easy it is to crack jokes with Scatterbrain. This goofiness is now embedded into her personality permanently. Expect more of this.

May

April-June is when I do my Art Fight preppin', which usually consists of me making a list of my most neglected OCs and giving them some attention. I also try to get around to eventually making all of them a reference sheet in this style, just so they have something standardized between them. This year, Walla Walla had her turn. She's a shitpost character, so I won't be drawing her much again, but she's a good excuse to draw some J-fashion doodles. My interests outside of cartoon stupidity don't really make it into my art often, so she's a minor outlet for some of it.

June

I've made even more character designs this year than last year, but they were all background characters, making Raoul the only new important one. He's been officially-unofficially written into the story since 2022, but it's very hard for me to make OCs that are written before they are designed. Everyone else was designed first and assigned a role in the plot later, so he got put off for a good while. I finally got around to it though, after I killed some darlings. He is now an all-new species, and I modified the chain design to something less clunky compared to what would be historically accurate.

July

July is, of course, Art Fight month. All other art is put on pause. This year, my favorite attack was a drawing of Enchanted Bones for my friend Bugles. I drew the character independently from the background, which is why the lighting situation is as unfortunate as it is, but we don't talk about that. Thank you to everyone who attacked me and made awesome art, I'll revenge you maybe in a few years. Sorry for the wait, but the backlog is mighty long.

August

Stanson got a slight redesign in the last year, so he can fit with the style of the comic better. He's actually the oldest character out of the bunch. I had no purpose for Scott when I made him and threw them together in the same folder. I had a few one-off designs that I figured I'd keep around in case I ever did an OCT, but these two got yoinked out of it when I started getting story ideas for the them. Stanson is a cowboy (not really), so it became a western setting to make sense of it. I plan on giving him the same sketchpage treatment the other characters have gotten, but I've been putting it off purposely for a while. You'll just have to wait.

September

And there it is, the inevitable page of Raoul getting into various mischief (and subsequently getting his ass beat half of the time). He has a very abrasive personality that gets him into trouble. I don't want the comic to be heavily action-based, but he naturally lands himself in these positions and it lets me draw characters in new situations. His introduction to the story is still a long way off at this point, but I can't wait to pit him against Scott in some slapstick shenanigans.

October

Spooky month is incredibly busy for me in real life, so there isn't as much time for art as I'd like there to be. That's why I dedicated all my time that month to trying to get Halloween art done in time. I've been a fan of Homestar Runner since childhood, and as soon as I thought that Raoul would pull off a Jigen Daisuke look, I knew I wanted to do a full Homestar-esque set of costumes. The other ideas quickly fell into place. My version came out way more detailed than theirs usually are though. The spirit of Halloween possessed me.

November

I started going full gear on the comic around this time (I think 28 hours in one week when I stayed home), so there's an absence of polished personal art here. Scatterbrain eating some spaghetti is my placeholder art for "I worked on a website a bunch instead". It's far from done, but I've made major strides since then.

December

A secret santa gift for my friend, Toby! I continued doing mostly comic work, but I also made room for a secret santa and scheduled a bunch of art trades to complete between December and March. The rest still have to be completed, so you'll see that throughout 2024. Anyway, Toby's OC, Thomas, is based on the state of Michigan. I plastered him on a postcard in front of a highway sign with some Robins because they're the state bird.

There were many more drawings of course, and you can find them scrolling through my Tumblr, or on my DeviantART (I switched to Tumblr as my main site in late August). I hope the new year brings many improvements and happiness for everyone. Last year my goal was simply to start on the comic, which I did, but it was also to get it uploadable, which I didn't. I'm gonna have to aim for the same goal again. Life things were largely fine but still tumultuous enough to throw me off-course, but now my most dangerous family member has moved out and it should be somewhat safer to live here. Not 100% safe though. It never will be. I generally avoid talking about the comic extensively as I won't have a solid release date for some time, so this is the last you'll hear of it for now outside of the rare WIP screenshot. Wish me luck and have a wonderful new year!

#art #artists on Tumblr #Happy New Year #long post #art summary #2023 summary #summary of art #summary of art 2023

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har-rison-s · 7 months

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your good will: 36

quality alone time

a/n: well hello guys.... if anyone's still here that is... it's been more than a year. sorry, BUT!! i am back with this series. i'm moving away from my home country in november, so i wanna get on with this story until i move. that's not to say i'll stop writing when i'm there - no, no. but since mine and maggie's stories sorta go in parallel right now (minus the very hot bf), i figured it'd be easier to write these things. mainly, really, i write for one person - myself. sawrry, but it's true! this is my story, my fantasies, whatever yk. writing this story makes me feel less alone, and right now i feel more in love with steve than ever. so i hope you enjoy this chapter and a few new ones to come. it's so hard to write a happy healthy couple because i have no idea what it's like, i don't know if this is even right and isn't too cringey. but i also know i'd be the best girlfriend ever i want steve as my bf. I will not accept anything else. have you seen the gifs of steve & jonathan the writers have posted on twitter? kinda losing my mind laughing at them. also happy spooky season! and happy reading, as always :)

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word count: 6.6k

characters in this chapter: steve harrington, maggie byers (oc), robin buckley, the party

warnings: fluff, smut, p in v (they're not animals, tho, but keep in mind that young adults and teens tend to have crazier hormones than the regular person)

gif credit goes to owner! pretty princess...

“Awh, it's our song,” Steve says, getting up off the couch and pulling Maggie up with him, “dance with me.” He tells her in a whisper, and Maggie blushes, and knows she has no choice but to find her feet on the living room make-shift dance floor, agreeing to his plea. Steve holding her hands, looking into her eyes, Maggie blushes even more and lets a smile crawl onto her features. She looks at the screen of his TV. The intro of Speedwagon's “Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore” plays strongly from the speakers, and Maggie looks up at Steve.

Suddenly she realizes that Steve's making them dance alone together in front of Robin and the kids, an audience, and she feels very self-conscious. She moves closer to him, melting into his hold of arms around her and body reaching close. Just like that, Steve makes Maggie feel like they're the only two people in the world. With their song.

“I can't fight this feeling any longer,” Steve sings along to it in Maggie's ear, “and yet I'm still afraid to let it flow,” Maggie smiles warmly into his chest, her forehead resting against him, “what started out as friendship has grown stronger,” Steve lifts Maggie's chin so she'd look up at him, and she giggles at Steve's raised eyebrows and amused looks on his face. Well, she couldn't really count it as friendship - what their relationship started out on - it could be called ‘acquaintances in dangerous situations who decided to hang out just before christmas but it was clear from the first hang out that between them was already more than friendship’, and that's part of the reason she finds this all amusing. Her patching his beat-up face up was what kicked the whole thing off, really, “I only wish I had the strength to let it show.” Steve caresses her cheek and kisses it after.

Through their song, Steve hugs Maggie close and sways them like two penguins in a slow dance between the TV and the guys lounging on the couch. The cute little predicament reminds her of the day “Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore” became her and Steve's song. He played it when he asked her to be his girlfriend. January 23rd. Cold, snowy night in Hawkins. He sang along to every line, because he meant every line, and no song ever before had put his feelings into words quite as clearly as that one. He told her he figured he's not always that good with words, so when someone's written them before he could think them, it's a good choice to go with to tell her how he feels.

Maggie remembers how she said yes, and how special it made her feel to be asked to be his girlfriend, much less anybody's girlfriend at all. No boy had really come into her life ever before, and to have this kind of connection with someone made her over-the-moon ecstatic. If she'd had any proper friends then, besides her mom and two brothers, she'd tell all of them. If she was in the school paper, that would be top news. The question made her so happy she could have screamed it so loud that astronauts in space could have heard her.

The words are so special to both of them, and hit close to heart each time they hear them. It's uncanny how true to their relationship and its context the lyrics are.

“My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you

I've been running 'round in circles in my mind

And it always seems that I'm following you, girl

'Cause you take me to the places

That alone I'd never find

And even as I wander

I'm keeping you in sight

You're a candle in the window

On a cold, dark winter's night.”

Maggie presses her forehead to Steve's, and both of them smile. They're still in their own world until the Party breaks the invisible seal and reminds them of their surroundings. “Look at them,” comes Robin's voice quietly, with a snicker at the end. The kids smile.

“Our baby-sitter parents are so cute,” Dustin joins in, and everyone has a laugh. Steve and Maggie crack into chuckles, too, and Maggie turns in Steve's arms to face the group, “you guys actually remind me of Suzie and me.” The young boy says, waving an index finger in the air. The Party break into exclamations of “no way!” and laughter. Even Steve laughs, his hair tickling Maggie's shoulder as his head hangs low, and Maggie just keeps smiling.

“Yeah, right,” Lucas laughs it off.

“No, it's true. The two of us are so much like these guys,” Dustin argues, “and now you all know that she is real, you can stop doubting it.”

“How could we forget?” Max asks. “Turn around… look at what you see-eee-eeee!” She starts to sing and the rest of the kids join her, laughing. Robin gets up from the couch and wrings Maggie out of Steve's grasp.

“I'll steal your girlfriend for just a bit, Steve,” she tells the older boy, who starts to frown, “we've got a party to plan.” Oh, right, Maggie had almost forgot. Steve's birthday party. The boy in question nods and runs a hand through his hair.

“Oooh, can we come?” Dustin asks, disrupting the Party's horribly off-key rendition of Never-Ending Story, directing all their attention to the older guys.

Steve points a finger at Dustin and, accidentally in unison with Maggie and Robin, tells him a stern “No. Not happening.” The girls giggle and walk from the lounge inside the kitchen, out of sight and hearing of the chaos that is about to pursue, called “Steve lists off good reasons for young kids to not come to his birthday party”.

“I'm so excited, look–I even got a notebook just for this!” Robin muses, pulling the mentioned notebook with a red cover out of her bag that's laying near-by. She slams it on the kitchen island and Maggie reads the words written on the front in permanent marker: “STEVE'S BIRTHDAY BASH”.

“Haha, that's great,” she tells Robin, “you're just a little more prepared than I am.” She admits and sighs, looking on dreamily as Robin opens the notebook. She notices Maggie's voice fading after saying that, and guesses that it must be because of everything that's happened, how it's still overwhelming her.

“Don't worry, we're a team at organizing this party,” Robin reminds her and nudges Maggie's shoulder with her own playfully, making the other girl smile, “so, guest list–who do we want there?” She asks and clicks a pen to write names down.

“Uh…” Maggie taps the kitchen island surface, thinking hard, “oh, the the basketball team. And swim team.” She says, and noticing that Robin isn't writing any names down, she takes the notebook and pen from her and begins writing the boys' names down. “It's okay, I know their names.” She assures Robin, and she nods.

“How big do you want this party to be, exactly?” She asks Maggie, and she shrugs.

“Um… well, I don't know. You said you had the idea to invite everyone, just for the fun of it. Would be cool if a lot of people would show up, actually,” she answers, “maybe I shouldn't even make a guest list and we should just… put flyers up everywhere - whoever wants to come, can come.” Maggie suggests.

“Yeah, but that could include people we wouldn't exactly want to show up,” Robin reminds her, and, catching her eye, Maggie realizes who she means.

“Tommy and Carol,” she says with a nod. But then Robin shrugs.

“But what if they do come? So what,” she says, “Steve won't care as long as he has, uh, you there.” Robin scratches out the names of football players Maggie managed to write down and just writes “EVERYONE” on the list.

“Really?” Maggie asks, looking up at Robin, and she nods surely.

“Really, I promise,” she says, “seriously, you light up not just the room when he sees you, but the whole world. I haven't known him that well, but when you guys started dating, it's like nothing else was important to him, nothing else made him as happy as you. Just seeing you in school or whatever.” Robin says matter-of-factly, casually, like it's no big deal. “Even if some of more my crowd comes, he won't mind. Maybe he'll freak out for half a minute, but after that he'll just forget. Won't care at all.” Robin shrugs and smiles at Maggie. She flips to a page where the words “FOOD & DRINKS” are written at the very top. Maggie rests her chin in her hand and sighs quietly.

She knew she had some sort of effect on Steve, like how he totally forgot about Tommy and Carol being at the skating rink because he was having a date there with Maggie, or how he actually learned to like properly studying in the last months of school, also because of her, and how he's generally become a less grumpy person to everyone, seeing how Maggie does it so easily.

Maggie wouldn't really be the person to notice this, because she never really knew Steve's communication with girls prior to her, but last fall, Steve was becoming closer with Dustin and giving him advice on girls… “Just act like you don't care.” “Even if you do?” “Even if you do. Drives them nuts.” Which, frankly, isn't the best advice, because girls like to be shown that they're important to someone, anyone. Maggie made Steve realize that. Because of Maggie, Steve learned how to get a girl's attention and how to talk to one without that technique. He learned how to let himself be involved with someone without holding anything back. You care, you show it, you're interested in someone, you show them, you act on it. You don't like something, you say it, you talk it out. Maggie made Steve drop the stereotypical behavior that made him so cool and popular in that regular high school of theirs, and it made him kind of a dick to girls.

What stopped him being a dick to girls was the whole ordeal with Nancy those two years ago. That also made him lose his hardly-any-kind-of friends - Tommy and Carol, because their true colors came out and Steve realized he's not like those kind of people at all, and doesn't want to be. He changed for the better - many things caused it, but Maggie, he and Robin would assume, most of all changed him. To be loved is to be changed, right? Maggie would never assume she'd have any effect on anyone or their lives, she's just… good old Maggie. Other people noticing her effect on Steve just makes it all the more real, therefore a little more unbelievable. Is she like actually making his life better, and has made him better? He's told her that in many ways multiple times, and has expressed his gratitude in lots of ways, too. Yet it still doesn't really stick in her stubborn mind.

“Alright, would he want a cake? Or no cake?” Robin asks, diverting Maggie's thoughts, breaking her out of the thought essay she's began to write in her wandering mind.

“Um, I could make one. We could do decorations together.” She answers, then looks up at Maggie. “Or make the whole cake together, if you want.”

“I'm kind of a kitchen hazard, but thanks for asking,” Robin nervously replies, “okay, cake,” she writes the word down, “what about other foods?”

“You can just be in the kitchen while I make it,” Maggie suggests, “I'd appreciate the company.”

“Oh,” Robin says quietly, “uhh, yeah, of course, no worries.” Robin's not really used to being invited to things, or included in them. She does have some friends, but they all have other friends, who are always the first option, not Robin. This is a nice offer. “Wh-when do you wanna make it?”

“I think Friday, a day before his birthday. Leave it in the fridge over night and it's gonna be fresh as ever on the day of,” Maggie says, “other snacks… well, I don't know. I don't really have that much money, so we could ask people to bring baskets or something.”

“Couldn't you ask Steve for money?” Robin butts in, and Maggie looks at her with slightly confused eyes. They're like Bambi eyes to Robin. “Oh, crap, was that the wrong thing to ask? Was that really rude of me just now?” Robin grows nervous. She's not the best at social etiquette.

Maggie knows that about Robin, but she wouldn't wanna make her feel awkward. “Not really, no,” she answers, “you're really practical in these things, Rob, and that's not a bad thing.” Maggie sighs. “I know Steve has a lot of money - well, mostly his parents do. My family doesn't, and… I just don't like asking for money. Especially from him, and since it's for his birthday party.”

“Well, I promise you he's ready to do anything for you,” Robin says, “but sorry, I shouldn't have asked and made this all… awkward.” She chuckles dryly, trying to ease the tension. Maggie puts her hand over Robin's, making the girl look at her. Maggie has a comforting smile on her face.

“You didn't,” she assures, “and you're forgiven, if that helps.” She tells Robin and pats her hand before withdrawing it. Robin feels so… comforted suddenly in her presence, but also all the more nervous. They're the same age, and Maggie's shorter than her, but most times Robin feels intimidated by her for no apparent reason. Intimidated in a good way, though, if that can even happen.

“Wow, you really are the angel Steve believes you are,” Robin blurts out, making them both laugh. Maggie just can't believe these compliments about herself, “okay, so we'll include 'bring your own basket and booze' in the flyers. What else? What time does the party start?”

“Hmm, I'd say… five? Six?”

“In the morning?” Robin jokes.

“Yeah, morning exercises for every teenager in town,” Maggie continues the joke, making them both laugh again. They go back and forth with jokes while planning out the party, even adding a schedule, because, although Steve keeps telling Maggie how he hates to be on display, the center of attention, and likes things be done privately, she knows he'll appreciate the surprise she's planned for him. Gifting him his special mixtape–a Byers signature gift–and making a toast to him in front of everyone in the middle of the party, around nine pm. The girls figure that will be the perfect time for a toast, and also an opportunity for other people to say what they want to Steve, though Maggie hopes no one takes it as a chance to embarrass Steve or play some nasty prank. She always wants everything to be on time, in harmony and perfect on someone’s special day.

“A mixtape. That’s such a cute gift,” Robin compliments Maggie’s idea, “anything else special planned?” Robin asks after Maggie whispers a quiet ‘thanks’, and now the shorter girl gently butts an elbow into Robin’s side at the question.

“Wouldn’t you love to know…” she jokes along, “okay, I think we’ve just about planned everything. We’re gonna need to get precious stuff that’s lying around the house up to Steve’s parents’ bedroom, and lock the room, just in case.”

“What about his room?” Robin asks, writing down ‘hide precious stuff in locked bedroom’ in her notebook.

Maggie shrugs. “He doesn’t mind if people go in there,” she states, “we could tell people to put gifts there–if they have a gift for Steve, that is.” She’s not very hopeful that more than three people will bring a gift. Most guests will just come and use the opportunity to drink themselves full. “Okay, what else…”

“Any rules for smoking or going in the pool?” Robin suggests.

“Eh, no,” Maggie answers, “smoke everywhere, swim–whatever. Maybe a no peeing sign for the pool.”

“Ooh, I can make that,” Robin says and writes it down in the to-do list as well, “any theme or dress code?”

Maggie shakes her head. “Nah,” she says, “people take that seriously only on Halloween.” She admits with an airy chuckle. “I think that’s it, huh? I’m kinda excited. Big high school summer party. Well, if a lot of people come, that is.”

“They will. I mean, you and I both know how popular Steve was in school,” Robin reminds her, “but most people will just come to drink, as you said.”

“Did you go to that Halloween party last year? I can’t remember whose it was, but that was an insane one,” Maggie tells her, but Robin shakes her head.

“I wasn’t invited,” she shrugs off.

“Me neither,” Maggie admits, “Jonathan kinda took me as his plus one, but I didn’t stick around for long. Such chaos.”

“Oh, wait, was that the party where Jonathan took Nancy home because she’d had too much to drink?” Robin recalls hearing something about it, and Maggie nods just as Steve comes into the kitchen. She hopes Robin won’t pull on the thread she’s whisked out. Wide eye glances exchanged, Steve feels a strange air in the room.

“How’s it going with the planning?” He asks.

“We’re just about finished,” Maggie answers, peeling herself off the kitchen island and heading to the fridge for a cold drink. Robin reminding her of the faithful Halloween party kinda threw her mood off-course.

“Great, cause the Beach Boys are about to get on stage,” Steve says.

“Ooh, my mom loves them,” Robin muses, “I’ll leave my notebook here, Steve, don’t you open it!” She tells him before walking back to the lounge. Maggie closes the fridge with a cold Coca-Cola in hand and sees Steve reading the title of the notebook. He chuckles.

“I won’t read it, don’t worry,” he assures his girlfriend, “I like surprises like this. Whatever you two have planned will be great.” Steve looks at Maggie and gives her a sweet smile. She returns one and comes closer to him, leaning into his embrace. They sway quietly and slowly to no particular rhythm in the empty kitchen.

“Is everyone having fun in there?” Maggie asks, the back of her head resting on Steve’s chest.

“Without a doubt,” he answers, “had to do some real convincing so Dustin or anyone else wouldn’t dare come to our party.” Maggie laughs at that. Those are a few head-strong kids in Steve’s lounge.

“I hope at least ten people comes to the party,” Maggie quietly wishes, “we went with the idea to just invite everyone. Robin said you wouldn’t mind.”

“Sure I won’t,” Steve assures, “Robin hasn’t really been to a party like this before, it will be fun for her. As long as you both are there, I don’t care who comes.” Maggie blushes and stands on her tiptoes to kiss Steve’s cheek. “You’re my best friends, you know.”

“Awh,” she says, snaking one of her hands up to the back of his head, scratching gently at his roots. Steve's eyes drop closed and he hums in what's lightly put as agreement to the motion, and Maggie smiles wider.

“How I love your hands in my hair,” he says in half-a-whisper.

“I know,” Maggie reminds him, “you'll get more later, when we're alone,” she makes sure to press her body into his more, knowing the effect that will have on him. Steve's grip on their intertwined hands around her waist tightens and he answers to her melted body against his with a push forward, gently pushing them both into the kitchen island, “I can't wait.” Maggie sighs, and presses a kiss to Steve's neck. She keeps at least one eye open for the entrance of the kitchen, in case anyone comes barging in.

“What if we…” Steve starts to say, one hand of his trailing down to Maggie's thigh, “skip ahead a little?” He suggests all while trying not to turn his words into moans with Maggie's hand raking his roots. Maggie smiles, turns around in his arms, pressing her back into the island, and pulls Steve closer, both hands in his hair, and a leg hiked over his hip. Steve's lips are immediately on hers, any caution towards the others in the house thrown to the side.

“We practically have… a full house,” Maggie reminds him between kisses and heaved breaths. Steve's hand slips under her shirt, raising goosebumps along her waist as it discovers the skin there for the hundredth time in their lives. Maggie is nearly fully laid on the kitchen island now, their bodies moving against each other border-line hungrily.

“I could ask them to leave,” Steve comes up with a solution, and Maggie just quietly laughs at the idea. She lays a fleeting kiss on his lips before squirming out from beneath him, regaining her breath, “uh, hello?” Steve exclaims in confusion, running a hand through his hair and looking at his girlfriend with wide eyes. His hair looks wild as Maggie admires his overall disheveled character, sipping on her cold Cola with a grin threatening to break into chuckles. These exact words from him remind her of the time when it was them both against the Party in Maggie's kitchen, when they had the bright idea to leave the house and distract the demo-dogs.

“Tempting, but… no,” Maggie tells him teasingly, still holding back from laughing out loud. Teasing her boyfriend is more fun than she expected. Before Steve can argue back or do anything to still hold her back, Maggie flees the kitchen, well on her way to the lounge. Now Steve's all hot and bothered and has a house full of guests. He shakes his head with a subtle smile on his lips, realizing what she's getting at. He's not sure she's done this before, Maggie's always been shy and private about these things. Oh, he'll get her back, later.

Steve returns to the lounge just as Beach Boys are finishing their first song, and he brings with him a Coca-Cola for everyone. “Here you guys are,” Steve hands everyone their drinks and receives many thanks, and then returns to the spot next to Maggie with a sigh. She smiles at him, tilting her head up at him, and Steve smiles back. He puts his arm around her and shifts his attention to the TV while Maggie gets comfortable in his hold.

They all laze around the lounge, singing and dancing to the songs playing, until the sun starts to set. Dustin and Steve have their fun to Queen's performance televised from London, Will and Robin have a great time during the Thompson Twins show, Max and El rave out to Madonna, and over-all the Party have a great time together with the baby-sitters to the largest pop music charity gig there ever could be. When the kids get to leaving, because they fell asleep just now at Phil Collins' set, Robin says they're about to miss the most fun.

“Duran Duran are about to get on,” she protests, standing in front of the TV, between the kids at the doorway and Maggie and Steve on the couch.

“Nah, it's okay, we'll watch at home,” Mike says with a dismissing hand gesture, “my house is closest, so we'll go there.” He looks around his friends, and they all nod. Maggie notices Will smiling, and seeming as close to his friends as he always was, before the whole misunderstanding this summer.

“Yeah, we better leave the babysitter parents alone,” Dustin tells Robin in less than a quiet whisper than he'd intended to. Maggie and Steve act like they know nothing about it as Robin looks them over. Ugh, she missed a cue again. And somehow Dustin always seem to know everything, pick up on little hints and quirks. Steve's thankful for that, because this is less awkward than asking everyone to leave at some point would be. But the kids made that decision themselves, thankfully.

“Oh, well, I'll split with you guys, then,” Robin decides with a shrug of her shoulders, and Dustin smiles, nodding, “Maggie, I'll see you next week.” She salutes her, and Maggie does the same.

“Yeah, I'll call you,” she confirms, “thanks for coming, you guys.” Maggie tells all the kids, and they mumble each their own thing in response, including a string of 'byes' as they leave the room. Maggie and Steve wave at Robin and the group as Robin follows the group out.

“Bye, get home safe!” Steve calls after them, their laughter fades out across the house. And then they shut the door behind them, all that's left in the house is the noise from the TV. “Well, hello, teaser,” Steve greets Maggie in a low voice and attacks her with tickles to her sides and kisses to her neck. She immediately explodes with laughter, tries to squirm away, but has no choice. She squeals and yelps, swatting Steve with her hands until he lets up and just smiles at her, laying now below him on the sofa, “you didn't tease me in the kitchen, right? That was someone else.” Steve jokes as Maggie regains her breathing, but she can't, because this makes her laugh even more.

She locks her legs around Steve's waist, pulls him lower down to her, “No, that wasn't me,” she says and takes Steve's face in both hands, “I was just getting a Cola,” she says in a played-up innocent voice, “why, did I get you all high and dry?” Maggie teases and slips her hand into Steve's shorts. He raises his eyebrows at her, noting once again her sudden boldness in these matters.

“You could say that,” he breathes and waits for Maggie's next step. She doesn't do much, just teases him some more with her hand ghosting over his growing erection, a grin spreading her lips. She knows what she's doing. But she stops, her hand traveling up to his happy trail, a finger just tracing it upwards. Seeing the defeated look on Steve's face, she bursts into giggles, as if he'd started tickling her again, “you are a tease.” Steve says with a shake of his head. Maggie shrugs and keeps one hand at the bottom of Steve's chest and the other on his cheek, caressing it softly.

“Do you like it?” She quietly asks and Steve nods, though not completely sure.

“Yeah, I did,” he finally tells her and kisses her lips slowly, feather-like, “my sweet girl,” Steve nicknames her quietly in her ear, laying a kiss right next to it, making Maggie's heart flutter just like it did when they first started to go out together. She smiles and gently holds the hand that Steve cradles the side of her porcelain face with. She loves it when he touches her face, and is so glad he picked up on it at one point in time by himself, because she is too shy to ever say it out loud.

Steve has a similar thing, he'd be lying if he said her holding his cheek didn't turn him into complete putty, putting him at her total mercy, succumbing to her completely. Of course, he's always at her mercy. He's just glad to finally be alone with her–kids always getting in the way. Now it's quite the perfect setting - love songs playing in the background from the still-going concert, they're alone in the house, how much more perfect could it be?

Steve nips and kisses at her neck, ever so sensitive, as his and Maggie's bodies are already moving in tandem against each other. Their legs tangled together, heating each other up more and more with every second, this Indiana heat wave has nothing on them working each other up. Maggie nearly feels like she can't breathe, like she forgot how to.

She pushes Steve's hair away from his face, bringing him down to her kissed-a-million-times lips, and that seems to have helped the shortage of air thing. “Steve,” Maggie sighs his name so heavenly to him, making both of them have deja-vu. She hikes her dress up higher, so it's be easier for Steve a few moments later.

“Baby,” he mewls back, hands now roaming all over Maggie, touching every spot of her like live wires, “y'make me feel like we're in my car again, and it's cold outside.” Steve confesses, and Maggie chuckles, because that's what she was thinking, too. Their first proper make-out in his car. It was winter. “Only your hands aren't cold.” Steve smiles and kisses her jaw again. Maggie's smile stretches wider.

“And we have nowhere to be, and no curfew,” she adds on, and chuckles at Steve for making a half-moan at those reminders. She'd think no curfew turns him on. Steve pulls away from her for just a moment to take his shirt off, throwing it somewhere behind the couch, but returns to her just as quickly and gives kisses to the inside of her hands, gives kisses all over them.

“God, I love these hands,” he tells Maggie, and she catches his eyes just for a split second, a bit of a crazy look in them. She knows he gets that way when he's really riled up, “and I love this face,” Steve says with pursed lips, grabbing both sides of Maggie's face and kissing all over it, too. She tries to laugh, because it sort of tickles and Steve's sudden madness is amusing, but she's nearly suffocated by him, so her laughter comes out muffled, “and I love this girl.” He kisses Maggie's lips and looks right at her to see the beautiful expression of her smiling now, too. He's sure there is no sight more beautiful than Maggie Byers smiling.

“Bet you love being inside me more,” Maggie bites back at him, pulling him down to her again, now right between her legs, her pulsating crotch on his very much hard one. This boldness that keeps showing up in Maggie puts Steve back a moment, he looks at her in played-up disbelief with his lips parted, though a devilish grin is growing on them. She just shakes her head, Steve looking at her making her feel embarrassed, “come on, just get in there.” A deep blush growing on her cheeks.

“My, my, my,” Steve says in-between pants while adjusting his underwear and then Maggie's, complying to her straight-forward request right away–you don't need to tell him twice. When he enters her, the laughter leaves the room for just a little while, quiet noises of adjustment and the start of pleasure filling in for the moment, “you're so right, Maggie,” Steve heaves in her ear, his hand interlinking with hers as he starts to move at the slow pace he knows Maggie likes. He loves being inside her, it's just indescribable, unrepeatable. Maggie bites her lip, hardy able to concentrate on whatever Steve is saying or wants to say when she's looking up at him. His hair has fallen out of the place Maggie tucked it into just moments ago, golden-brown streaks of hair with blonde highlights here and there falling over his forehead. Steve's eyes are the usual beautiful brown that they are, eyebrows knit together in intense concentration, his cheeks pink over the summer tan, his lips parted. His other arm is strained over Maggie, gripping the armrest, his famous thin, gold chain swaying above her. He is just so breath-taking that she can't look away, neither can she think of or concentrate on anything else, “you bold, bold girl.” Steve says with a faint grin on his lips.

Maggie chuckles, shakes her head, almost tries to hide from him behind the one hand covering her face. But Steve moves that hand away with the knot of their intertwined hands, uncovering her blushing, plump cheeks and beautiful, thoughtful eyes, even if they are filled with shyness. They look into each other's eyes, watch as their lips part with their heavy breaths and moans that fuel their desire for one another. Steve's the first one to crack - literally cracking up with giggles out of nowhere - his head now resting on Maggie's chest. She starts giggling, too, Steve being just that infectious, and they soon become an intertwined mess of laughs, moans and panting. Neither of them would wish it any other way.

“I love you so much,” Steve says out of breath right when he knows he's not far from that push off the edge. And he recognizes Maggie's body language so well that he knows she's not far, either, “my pretty girl,” Steve muses, “I know you're close.”

“Yeah, Stevie,” Maggie confirms in her own heave of breath, “you feel so good inside me,” she confesses to him, and Steve moans. He loves praise just as much as she does. Steve runs his free hand up the inside of Maggie's thigh, lifting it higher and wider up, therefore reaching a deeper spot inside her with his length. It makes the girl whine, her back coming off the couch, “ah, just like that.” She praises to him. “C-Can you go faster?” She requests, though shy in doing so, because she's known to like taking things slow.

It surprises Steve, but he nods. “Yeah,” he heaves, “yeah, of course.” He rests both forearms by Maggie's head, knowing it will be easier this way, and quickens his pace inside her. Maggie holds onto Steve's frame with the hand that's not intertwined with his, and adjusts to the new change. Both their breathing weighs heavier, their bodies hot against each other, intertwined, eye contact stronger than the poor couch they’re driving out of its place. “Like that, baby?” Steve checks in, and only gets the best answer ever - a high-pitched moan from Maggie he’s not sure he’s head before.

“Yeah,” Maggie whines, her head falling back as he continues to thrust into her. God, it feels like heaven. She wouldn’t have expected herself to like this fast, but something was missing and this was it. Steve’s hitting all the right spots inside her, grazing her walls in such a torturingly pleasure-filled way, nearly making her see stars. Feels like he’s killing her, but in the best way on earth, “Steve…”

“Baby,” Steve responds in the same tone of desperation, eroticism, pleasure, “gonna make you come, baby girl,” he promises her. Baby girl is new in nicknames, Maggie discovers, though barely conscious, but oh, how she loves it. She whimpers and clings to Steve as she feels herself finally reach that point, that sacred point she’s been teasing Steve and herself to come to for almost a whole day, “thaaaaat’s it, fuck…”

Steve stills inside her, reaching his orgasm in time with hers, filling her walls up with ribbons of his come, a quiet whisper of her name as his mantra. He rest his head on her chest, feels her hand tracing from his shoulder up to his hair, and hears Maggie not being able to say anything other than his name as she goes through and comes down her own release, just whispering it a barely audible volume. Her breaths come in long, heavy exhales, and she lays done under Steve, drifting back into reality. He moans at the heavily feeling of her fluid milking his length, warm, welcoming, familiar.

“You're incredible,” he praises in the midst of a mind-blowing orgasm, “that was amazing,” Steve says in a heave of breath and looks up at Maggie, those big, beautiful brown eyes staring at her through his fallen strands of thick hair. Maggie runs her hand through them to see his face, and she smiles, nodding.

“Yeah, that really was… somethin’,” she tells him as he gently pulls out of her, making her mutter a whimper at the end of her sentence. He sits up before her, bare chest with chest hair and his happy trail in all their glory just for Maggie to see, and she bites her lip as she takes him in. Never fails to make her swoon - seeing her boyfriend bare-chested. Steve sends her a wink and slaps his underwear back on, taking care of hers right after, sliding it back up her pretty legs.

He pulls her up with him so Maggie can sit in his lap, his back pressing into the couch, Maggie getting comfortable on top, and they embrace each other. Their breathing is still somewhat heavy, irregular at least. Maggie locks her hands at the back of Steve’s neck and pulls back a little, just to take another look at him. Hair wild, cheeks tinted pink, lips parted, eyes staring back at hers. She smiles sweetly at him.

“Baby girl, huh?” She asks, and Steve smile cheekily, a chuckle bursting through him, humming throughout Maggie. “I loved it when you called me that,” she admits, and Steve raises his eyebrows.

“I could feel that, yeah,” he says and pulls her back close to him by her waist, “really did the trick for you, baby girl.” Steve teases, bumping his nose with Maggie’s, it makes her giggle. He can feel the immediate effect that the nickname has on her in her body language, in how she breathes, how her hips still a little, yet yearn for closer touch, how her cheeks tint a raspberry color.

She kisses him on the lips heavily, finger pads once again going into the roots of his hair. “Stop, you’ll get me hot and heavy again,” Maggie warns him with a slight grin on her face. Steve smiles wide.

“What if I do…” he inquires, though rhetorically in part, looking at her in their closeness. His hands roam the skin under her shirt, still hot to the touch from their shenanigans.

“Well, then I’ll touch your hair again just how you like it,” she answers the question, “and we’d be at it all night.” Steve raises his eyebrows.

“I wouldn’t be complaining,” he tells her, and makes her laugh again. Maggie shakes her head as she laughs and moves around so she’d be laying back-first in her boyfriend’s hold, now both of them facing the TV, “wow, it’s still going.” He says, seeing the broadcasted stage and audience on the screen.

“Yeah, it’s not even that late yet,” Maggie reminds him.

“With you time works differently for me,” Steve admits to her and lays a kiss on her neck. Maggie smiles. How lucky she truly is.

“I love you,” she hums to him, momentarily looking up at him, and sees him almost upside down, which makes her giggle.

“And I love you,” Steve responds, hand caressing Maggie's cheek, “my beautiful girl.” She tucks her head into his neck, bends her legs in his lap, gets comfortable in his hold altogether. “Wanna watch a movie after this?”

“Yeah, that'd be fun,” she says, and suddenly it dawns on her. They spent most winter and spring evenings watching movies at Steve's house together, both got to pick the movies, after study sessions or even right after school. She's not gonna have that anymore when she moves away. She won't get a call from him asking her to come over, she won't be able to come over.

It dawns on Maggie how much she'll miss those nights. How much she'll miss Steve. She hugs herself all the more closer to him because of it, suddenly feeling very emotional, like she could either burst into a fit of hysterical laughter or start crying at any trigger either way. She tries to smile, but a sad expression paints across her face. And she can't shake this small epiphany.

series tag-list: @givemequeen @yllwtaxi @wnygirl2012 @watercolour-sloth @brinaprfct @whormotional @chaandii @e-lysium @tina1938 @mochminnie @talksoprettyjjx

permanent tag-list: @gabiatthedisco @v0idbella @works-of-fanfiction @ur-gunna-h8-ths @betweenloveandfire @but-legendsneverdie @deardeacy @thewinchesterchronicles @mavieesttriste16 @intrrverted @the-freak-cassie-131 @xoxobabydolls @corallyink @rottenstyx

let me know if you want to be tagged in future chapters !!!

#steve harrington x reader #har-rison-s work #har-rison-s writes #steve harrington smut #stranger things fan fiction #stranger things fic #steve harrington fic #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x oc #your good will #steve harrington series #stranger things series

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chipped-chimera · 6 months

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Hey I'm Kery! Welcome to my main personal blog where I ramble about modding, corral my reblogs and post WIPs. I'm the most active on here, but if you want to check out my art-only blog, you can find it @kerynean .

I'm a 30 y/o Australian cisgender gal, though I originally came from New Zealand. I'm neurodiverse (the Autism/ADHD combo) and I consider myself to be disabled, Lesbian and femme-aligned NB (though I'd say autigender if I'm gonna split hairs, non-binary is just easier). I'm still figuring out where I am in terms of Lesbian identity (late bloomer over here) but if I were to hazard a guess it'd be soft butch/chapstick-lesbian/stem? I'll get back to you on that one, lol.

I'm pretty creative, I dabble in digital art and sometimes photography, both real and virtual and I've been writing fiction stories since I was a kid who was obsessed with books (though I tend to read more fanfic these days, oops). I like to write original fiction but I tend to get way too into the world building side of things, I like figuring out the setting and lore, environment etc. (I'd probably make a good DM, ngl) Outside that I do think I have a missed calling as a tattoo artist that I probably won't get to fulfil in this lifetime, so instead I design them for characters and make OC tattoo mods for videogames. I'd love to get more tattoos irl!

I am a big Gamer Girl(TM), I orignally was studying in game design before life shit got in the way of that. I find game systems really interesting, and do get a kick out of figuring out how they work - so modding has kind of been a natural evolution of this - you can check out what I've been messing around with under #my modding. My preferred platform is PC, I know how to build them (though I rarely get to) but recently upgraded my PC to be a souped up bonus room heater with funky lights so I can do more shit with 3D art (and gaming stuff ofc is a bonus lol).

Favourite Games/Series: Mass Effect, Assassin's Creed (Odyssey + Valhalla specifically, but I do actually follow the meta narrative), Dragon Age, Cyberpunk 2077, The Witcher (yes I have played all of them), Crusader Kings III, Planet Zoo, Animal Crossing, FFXIV, Ark: Survival Evolved, Guild Wars 2 ... and more! You can find my steam profile here.

[ PROFILE // TAGS // CHARACTERS // MODS ]

#pinned

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aria0fgold · 23 days

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Okay like, I think it'd be too long to put in the tags of the last post so I'm making my own post but ngl that method helped me A LOT. It helped me unlearn So Much stuff by having that first thought, interrogating it, and replacing it. Cuz way back, the thing I'd do is have the first thought, hate myself for it, never try to have it again which isn't helpful At All. And then I reached a point in my life where it was like, have the first thought, avoid it, which is just as worse.

And then last year, when I realized A Lot of stuff bout me, I had to work on unlearning so much during then and like okay, this is like treading the territory of "you gotta be unwell a lil bit to heal" typa thing, like imagining your favourite characters Right There. But mine is like, a lil to the left. Cuz when I realized all the stuff I gotta unlearn, there wasn't any character from a media that can count for that just yet (I got hyperfixated on Cain months after the realization but if I've known him earlier he would've ngl took on the patron saint role in my life of unlearning unhealthy stuff)

So what I did was... used an OC. It wasn't Alec and Ray surprisingly enough cuz in my head they have their own lives and it was a lil harder for me to put them in that role. And it just so happens I have One OC that is specifically made with an awareness that makes it seem like he's a self-insert but not really. It's Alerik. The designated creator of the universe that is practically aware of the truth behind that universe and his own existence so it was easier to pull him. And it worked.

Cuz whenever I do the have first thought, interrogate it, replace it thing, I can't get it right in a way that when I think of interrogating Myself, my brain's immediate reaction is always "hatred" so then when I got Alerik to do the interrogation, my brain couldn't react immediately cuz it isn't just Me, there's Alerik now and he's both me and not at the same time, he's a piece of me. That I love. So my brain couldn't react with "hatred" towards a character I made with love, it worked. I could interrogate myself, figure out "why" I reacted the way I did, "why" I had that first thought, and what I could do moving forward without hating myself or avoiding anything. And I love it. Cuz after a year of just that, slow and steady, I managed to unlearn most of the bad habits and get rid of the self-hate. I love myself now! And the world! And everything just seems so much beautiful this way.

#aria rants #yall rlly just be insane in a way that you gotta pull a character to help with your healing and unlearning of unhealthy stuff #it just so happens that i did it a lil to the left but it still worked! it ngl only works on alerik cuz it comes easy for him somehow #like i dont have to concentrate or focus or anything. if i had smth i need help with in regards to myself he'd just pop up #i still do it from time to time cuz improvement doesnt just happen once! but i dont do it as frequently which is a good thing i think #like whenever i catch myself thinking really negatively im like: whoa there. alerik cmere cmere #and i just give myself a few minutes of silence of figure stuff out. also kinda funny how in order for me to silence my brain's #habit of self-hate. i had to trick it by pulling a character i love in front like a shield just to stop that one habit #like as much as i hated myself back then. all the ocs i made are made out of love. it was where i redirected my love to #so the thought of hating my own characters never rlly crossed my mind at all. even the ''villain'' ones. so my brain couldnt #redirect the hatred meant for Me towards a character i made with a love that i specifically directed to when i couldnt direct it to myself #ya need a lil bit of trickery to get by the habits that your brain has been trained by. continuously. and then someday.#all those bad habits will slowly go away. may not even be permanently but itll be okay! itll come back and leave but it wont stay

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tunabesimpin · 10 months

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heyyyyy

so uh...uh i saw the seaside event and wanted to submit my oc (damn im doing this on PC for easier typing but now i cant use emojis-)

So uh, her name's Yumena (she's a fennec fox kitsune who's still young so she currently only has three tails) and her favorite summer activity is probably surfing and she's likely to build elaborate sandcastles and - of course - surf at the party. her favorite color is a brown-ish red, something like blood/garnet/currant/ruby

and she'd wear something like this (so so sorry if the images annoy you, i'm not that great at describing clothing and colors unless it's specific)

since she's in an established relationship w/ idia, he's her plus one. she convinced him by revoking his petting rights for 4 months (i forgot to mention that she can turn into a fennec fox with three tails for max petting efficiency!) he got so used to petting her that he'd get withdrawals so he relented and agreed. (she also mentioned that it'd be like one of those classic filler beach episodes that are so common in anime)

aaaaand this is how she looks! (the pupils are slitted, the horizontal divide are a divide in colors. so the top division is scarlet (#900do9) and the bottom division is #ffa6c8) her hair is a mix of raisin (#290916), wine (#2c041c) and eggplant (#311432). Her skin is #f9bf91

I hope this wasn't confusing...

--- After playing in the sand a bit with Idia, Yumena spotted some free use surf boards lined up near the floaties. The ever excited fox gave Idia the brightest grin as she spoke "Ooooh~! Say Idia... you still have some charge on your tablet right?" Idia nodded slowly, not fully following yet. Yumena continued "Then! Why don't you rate my surfing! It'll be just like that beach sports anime I saw you watching!" Idia choked a bit, not realizing she knew about that "W-w-wHA?! I mean i guess this would be a good opportunity, but i have no idea what goes into judging that and when did you see me-" Idia continued to mutter under his breathe as his frantic mind was caught off guard. Yumena rolled her eyes and gave a wink as she grabbed one of the surf boards "Just use your gut feeling~ and keep your eyes on me!"

Quickly, Yumena ran into the ocean, straddling her board as she took her time to get comfortable and feel out a few waves. It wasn't before long that a larger wave was rolling in, perfect timing for her display. She followed the wave, paddling slightly before rising fully onto the board. She was quickly to get her balance and rode along! Her board seemed to dance atop the crashing waves, spinning and dipping around. As the wave curls under itself and diminishes, she splashes off the board and into the water.

She resurfaces, looking around before hearing Idia callout "H-... HIGHSCORE!" He grips his table, hiding behind a screen reading 10 points. Yumena smiles happily and chuckles at his scoring, wondering how he came to it. All that mattered though was in his mind, she would always be first place. ---

I've never seen or tried surfing before, so it was a fun concept to watch and learn from! It makes me want to go and try it for myself ^O^ Thank you for participating!!! I hope you enjoyed it!!!

#tuna be talkin #the-dumber-scaramouche #tunasseasidesq #twst fanevent #event request #twst #twisted wonderland #twst oc #twst fanart #twst idia

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lorei-writes · 5 months

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Meowdy! What is your favorite part about making characters? What is your least favorite part?

Hi! Hi!

(I'm most definitely going to store 'Meowdy' in my dictionary now. I love it.)

Before I jump into this -- please, excuse any typos or other errors I may make. Brain fog is hitting me really hard right now, so well. I am trying. My head just doesn't want to co-operate. (I know I could technically wait, but... a. I don't know when this situation may improve; b. I've been dying to talk about this, since it is an interesting topic).

I would say that my process starts at a story, so all of my favourite and most disliked things about making characters are fairly connected to that.

Essentially, I get an idea blurb, make a character-crutch to realise it... and then gradually develop them as events progress, usually while writing. (That's why I talk more about Esther than Viva -- I've simply written more of her). Sometimes I do not plan for a character to become a fully-fledged OC, but the opportunity just calls for it. (Like with Tatsuoki in Winter Flower -- it was around 20k words mark that it occurred to me it would make perfect sense to flesh him out... and so editing commenced).

As such, the favourite moment? When things just start falling into place, and I am inclined to think my character doesn't seem like just a convenient tool for the sake of plot. I want for their internal structure to believably generate events.

Least favourite? My constant source of despair? It means I have to write, or to at least spend a good amount of time contemplating a story (which, arguably, may be worse -- I tend to go through multiple scenarios then. It is easier to settle on things once the words hit the paper). And there are too few Loreis for that! I have more ideas than I can reliably process, but letting go of them makes me sad...

... It's also my current position :') Worst part is, I have the general background idea for this OC. I know what personality framework I'd start with. I know the general plot premise. I know the pairing (... it'd be Clavis). I know how it'd fit into my Pri OC-verse. HELL, I even have the name for her (... Veronica Theresa Pia di Fiore ...) and the design. I JUST DON'T HAVE ENOUGH COPIES OF MYSELF >,>

There are also side characters I came up with that haven't appear anywhere yet. Which is also a source of my " D: ". Because to write them, I first need to get a good grasp on some other events, and for that, well... More writing needs to be done. (That being said... It will be amusing if you ever see Stella "Shtela" Bergamotka, just saying.)

#answered #pathogenic

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choicesficwriterscreations · 5 months

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Sorry about all the blow up about that LGBTQIA+ archive poll. I've been thinking about it myself, and maybe what I would suggest is a LGBTQIA+ MCs archive that can include fics about any MC whose writers state that the character is LGBTQIA in any way regardless of their current relationship and doesn't deal with canon characters and their sexualities. It could include trans MCs, gay MCs, bi MCs in straight presenting relationships, ace MCs, and so forth. Then you could have another archive specific to gay ships, and the requirement to have your fic in that archive is that it can be basically anything that isn't cis mlw.

I think that most people who are looking for content in an LGBTQIA+ archive wouldn't be looking for a fic where the only indication that it's queer in any way is that the author stated outside of the fic itself that their MC is bi. So having a Choices pairings archive specific to non-het couples could make it easier for readers looking for queer to find it and would make it simpler to identify what qualifies to be a part of this archive. With the LGBTQIA+ MC archive, you'd still be able to showcase characters who are queer but are in straight-presenting relationships, and again it'd be easier to determine what qualifies as fitting into this archive because the writer has complete control over their MC, how they identify, etc, and wouldn't lead to fights about different interpretations on how a canon NPC (like the LIs) identifies.

Just an idea as I've thought about this. You obviously don't have to do this, and you can just forget about the archives completely if it makes your lives easier. But, if you wanted to still do an archive like this, maybe this would help.

Thank you for your reply, Nonny.

It’s almost time for our bi-annual cleanup of our Meet our MC and OC profiles. When that is done, I think we will indicate there.

Honestly, after the blow up over this and how horribly some people were treated, I am not inclined to go out of my way too much in the future.

Of course, I don’t want to let the few ruin things for the many, so we will see what we do.

Later this week I will be posting guidelines for the LGBTQIA+ archive. We will keep it in place with those guidelines for now.

Thank you!

#choices fic writers creations #cfwc asks answered #this is why we can’t have nice things

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blubushie · 1 year

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How badly do they want to reach their end goal?

How sensitive are they to their own flaws?

What memory do they revisit the most often?

Who do they regret meeting the most?

And for you-

What inspired you to create them?

What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

How badly do they want to reach their end goal?

This would be easier to answer if either of them actually had end goals! Mundy is content with where he is in life. He has his work, and for him that's all he needs. That's his purpose. He's fine with it. Jesse is happy where she is too, even if she misses matches, but her only "real" goal was being able to provide for her mum and she's reached that, so much like Mundy she's just drifting through life now and taking things as they come.

How sensitive are they to their own flaws?

Mundy is fully aware of his flaws and they haunt him. Jesse knows some of her flaws but is unaware of others. Generally neither of them are very sensitive to their flaws for now. Mundy becomes much more sensitive to his own as the story progresses (but I can't speak on that because spoilers!)

What memory do they revisit the most often?

I can't speak on either of these. Jesse's is hinted at in the upcoming chapter and the full scope is revealed later. Mundy's is revealed later in a Big Event. :]

Who do they regret meeting the most?

Mundy loves his life as an assassin. He enjoys his work. But it's also caused him tremendous heartbreak. It's cost him his reputation and most of all it's cost him his family. A part of him does regret meeting the first man who ever hired him. Similarly, Jesse loves her job as a merc but a part of her does regret ever meeting Craig Donovan. Killing him put him on the path she's on and she's content with that now, but Craig Donovan was the source of a lot of past (and some ongoing) heartbreak for her.

What inspired you to create them?

For Jesse, it was just a general "This piece of media is fun, I wonder what I could do with it." Jesse was originally a bloke, and she went through a lot of changes to get to where she is now as a character. I also don't have a lot of feminine or female characters on account of just not vibing with femininity much, so I figured it'd be a fun way to explore that while not necessarily getting femininity wrong. So she's a tomboy.

Mundy was made the way he is because I'm actually a bushie and a sniper and I vibe with him because of that. Also because we're just so similar. I've been over it before (bushie, sniper, outcast from Australian society, never fitting in because of things I can't change, people meeting me and not thinking I'm Australian, parents don't approve of my work, reclusive, live in a van, constantly having to prove my identity as an Aussie, grew up with a sense of something being wrong with me, etc etc).

I've mentioned it once or twice before I reckon, but I'm not comfortable with therapy. There's things I can't even tell a therapist, and I don't trust them in general. But Mundy is so similar to myself while also still being a separate character that I can comfortably write him and explore parts of myself and my own issues. And make a story of it. A compelling one, even.

Writing is my therapy.

What do you feel when you think of your OC?

For Mundy, it's often a certain sorrow because outside of being my characterisation of a canon character, he's also heavily based on myself and my experiences. For this reason it's also a little embarrassing sometimes, since I put so much of myself into him. Feels like I'm laying my own soul bare for whoever reads it. Characterisation-wise, he's a mirror of myself, both the good and the bad. It's bittersweet. Writing him happy makes me happy. Writing him sad makes me sad.

Jesse's also a little bittersweet, especially recently. It's not something I'll elaborate about. Usually though, it's pride. Especially in how far she's come.

#blu whos #learnin the blus

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space-blue · 1 year

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I wanted to let you know that I am super SUPER excited for your recom picrew 😩 it looks beautiful already!! I've got two questions. I wanted to ask how difficult the process is for creating one, I've thought of trying to make a na'vi one myself. Is it complicated with all the layers and all of that? And wanted to also ask if you have any more avatar-related picrew projects planned for the future!

Ahaha, thank you Anon!! I'm excited for it to be over as well tbh. I wanna play with it and more importantly move on with my life lmao. I truly believed it'd be 3 days work... And I was wrong.

Yeah, gotta be honest, it's a massive bitch.

Mostly the issue that is costing me a ton of time is the stripes. Picrew does not surpport blending modes. You only upload normal PNG files. Because of that, I can't have a single stripe pattern for every skin colour.

No : I must export as many stripe colours as I have skin colours. And the stripes MUST match the colour of the ears for better transition... AND there are 3 types of faces in what I've done, that means that for EACH design of stripe, I need to export 3 shapes x 4 colours.

Another issue has been the noses. Entirely my fault mind you... But hiding part of the eye with broad noses, like here :

Meant I needed to have painting INSIDE some of the noses. Which I did on a single file. And uploaded. And matched to skin colour so you don't see my ugly patching up job.

But the nose needs to be on top of the eyes... The stripes must be under the eyes and on top of the nose... Which can't happen... So I have two options, and I've opted for redoing all my stripes better... And then realised fixing the noses instead would be so much easier.

I do wanna cry a little sometimes lol

But they look better now. I have 3 styles of stripes and I want to do 3 or 4 more, because I really love striping and it makes characters really unique. Next up is potentially eye colour (if y'all suck my metaphorical dick hard enough because what A PAIN).

Sanhi/Tanhi whichever spelling it is, is giving me grief and I'm looking for a CSP brush that would sort of automate it for me.

It's a LOT of tedium. Drawing is easy and has been very fun! I was dreading making the hairstyles and get ups for Na'vi, but I think I'll revisit the picrew itself later and add them as new options rather than making a separate one.

File uploading on the website is such a bitch. Here's the tutorial I use btw. I also use a firefox add on to auto translate the page.

Will I do more? Definitely. In time. I lost the one job that pays for my food, so was thinking of opening a few comms and focus on that rather than just faffing about, but I'll definitely be returning to picrew, either for more Na'vi stuff or simply to try my hand at some other style. I'd love to see more people do their own Na'vi picrews!!

I made this one simply because the options are so limited!! There's two and one is full bodied and chibi. That's nice but doesn't scratch my pfp or OC needs. Feel free to make more, I'd love to play with it!!

#picrew #avatar #recoms #anon #thank you anon!!#Off to work on it now

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tiredassmage · 1 year

Note

pledges made on bloody knees from the WIP game?

Nervous laughter!!!! So, remember how I mentioned Tyr would fuck up and make poor decisions even knowing the outcome was anything but good?

This is that. So I could get it out of my system instead of continuing to ruminate on it and watch it become progressively worse (considering recent discussions, that was maybe... half-successful). That's why the details of this are half-baked because I just needed to purge angsty dialogue out of my brain.

And also that like three-month long moment I had about "you know what would be romantic? The inherent tragedy of Tyr and Malavai catching feelings for each other and oh my god, Theron, I think you're developing a type. (Emotionally compromised Imperials. Rough one, buddy.)"

What could possibly go wrong? :,)))

“Tyr!” Malavai hissed as he snatched the Commander’s arm, desperation tearing through the professionalism that so often grounded him when little else could.

He’d spent hours running strategies and tactics for when this day would come. It’d never done much to tame the fear that would claw through his stomach whenever he faced down reality.

“If you go in there…” Malavai swallowed harshly. Tyr’s storm-gray eyes calmly leveled with his and he felt his heart sink.

He knew exactly what he was doing.

“You know what they do with traitors, Tyr. Please… This is suicide, Commander!”

Tyr offered him a faint smile, almost apologetic. “This was always the plan, Major. We both knew that,” he said quietly. Still, he reached out and gently caressed his love’s jaw.

Quinn bit the inside of his lip in a vain attempt to prevent it from trembling. “Commander…” It was a kindness, really - the ability to fall back on titles. It was a way to offer each other space, to pace themselves. “I… Sir, even if they don’t find you, the blast radius on these charges…”

The Commander sighed quietly as his gaze dropped. “We can’t afford to let them get this thing in the air, Major.”

The risk was too great. But even that Republic agent hadn’t-

“I…” Malavai’s eyes stung. He rolled his jaw and swallowed harshly. “I… understand, Commander…”

Everyone call Tyr a bastard for taking Malavai with him because Theron wouldn't take this half as well and, tactically, it was easier to have an Imperial officer at his side rather than the ex-SIS agent. He knew exactly what the fuck he was doing and I'm still mad at him for this. Played them all like a fiddle and has the audacity to tell them it's okay.

I haven't worked on this in months (did I really start this in September??? Of course I wrote it late at night, that sounds like a thing I'd do) because I still don't trust him. And I still have no idea where they're taking the saboteur storyline and I swear- If they encourage this bullshit, I'm suing Tyr for everything he's worth.

And also I haven't emotionally recovered from this part, either:

“Malavai, make me a new promise.” Tyr watched him steadily, stilling him with his careful words. “Look after Theron, alright..? And you’re still a father, Malavai. I need you to stay here, okay..?”

Literally don't look at me @ my own ocs, as if I wasn't in enough pain, I just thought it'd be silly to make it worse. On myself. With bg SW/Malavai. Is part of the reason I haven't dedicated to this because it hurts me to write? Possibly. Very, very possibly!

Not pictured is somewhere, Theron is getting into as close to a fistfight as possible over holocall with Jonas for letting Tyr go through with this. Send your prayers to Jonas because I do not envy him trying to explain this.

#y'know when your ocs just take the wheel and drive off and you're clinging onto the bumper just along for the ride? that #it taunts me sitting in my google docs okay every time i read the title i'm like 'not today satan'#answered #ch: tyr #wip ask meme #swtor #swtor fanfic #dot words

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dez-wade · 6 months

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Omg okay one last thing before I make myself sleep,, do you think if they spent enough time together, Forever would add Ama to the megabase name? Or even just give her full access, maybe make her a room bc she'd want a safe place with him to put her bed too.

I'm unsure because I know that base is very special to him and Richas but I know how much Forever loves the eggs and how protective he'd be of a new Brazilian egg especially.

I think Ama going out of her way to spend time with him by dragging him to dungeons and collecting things that remind her of him so she can give them to him would soften his heart so very much so I do think, just like how Ama drags him to do dungeons, Forever asking could convince Ama to do some projects for just the two of them even though she doesn't like building bc she's bad at it

That got off track but whatever u seen my blog name LOL I am a Forever girlie and I think I'm within my right to have this egg oc love him too since it'd be in character, she WOULD love all of her parents 😤😤

Forever would LOVE Ama, I think. He really likes the other eggs, and sometimes he doesn't spend too much time with them because he doesn't want to spend so much time speaking English because of the chat, since the translator rarely works for him. Just because Ama would speak Portuguese it would make his life much easier.

I think he'd definitely drag her to do anything that he can, if he's allowed, just like Richas. Especially putting her to work XD

I think he'd try to avoid being alone with her without Richas at first because he's super jealous and that's what he does with Tallulah. But I think eventually Richas wouldn't be so bitter about it. Especially if he's spending time with the other parents.

Forever would definitely be the first to make sure she's super protected. He usually doesn't like to get in the way of people's grind, but I think he'd expect that Bagi wouldn't be very good at farming the best armor and such, so likely that he'd be the one doing that job. Giving her good weapons too.

She'd definitely have a big room in the NINHO like Richas too.

#qsmp #hc

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oceandiagonale · 2 years

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Have you ever considered a discord for all the OC talk? It seems like it'd be a lot of trouble but oughhh 14 OC asks seems like a LOT to have to sort through and answer, and having them in one place where everyone can talk about them might be a bit easier than this O_O

ahhh discord is so scary though, I only use it to talk to my partner and play dnd 😭😭😭

it would be really nice if everyone could talk about OCs together more and bounce ideas around!! but running a server feels so intimidating -- I'm nervous to commit to that since I'll be pretty busy this semester 🥲🥲🥲

it is a little bit overwhelming but that's why I'm trying to pace myself!! I also want to make sure I answer them all so my inbox doesn't end up being like, 50+ unread asks and then everyone is stressed about it 😭

I was thinking of doing a thing where I just answer everything on one or two days a week, like "OC Sundays" or something?? but I've mainly just been answering them when I'm stressed this week because they give me something else to think about 🥺🥺🥺

#oceandi answers #anonymous #others' ocs #it's just that I get all these asks and I physically jump out of my seat and shout 'WOOHOO!!!!!' because I love reading them so much!!!#legitimately makes me want to run around and jump because they're so fun 😭😭😭#not to mention that I end up thinking about them too like #last night I had a dream where I was driving but the car was propelled by walking and then I was just walking right?? as you do??#made me think about darkrai's silent protagonist and if he can fly or drive or all that #14 seems like a large number but when I go through everything one by one it's much less intimidating because I get lost in the content!!

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