#like fuck dude. americans are still PEOPLE

[theficpusher]

Falling For You by YesIsAWorld | G | 1425 Five times Harry orders very particular drinks, and one time Louis finds out why. Featuring Starbucks’ fall menu.

tell me what you need by disgruntledkittenface | G | 2497 “And a fresh cherry?” he asks, pinching his bottom lip between his fingers. He waits as Louis stares him down, his brow furrowing. “No? What the fuck,” Louis rasps, looking bewildered.

Matcha Me and Matcha You by LadyLondonderry | G | 2508 Louis does not like the douche, and the douche clearly looks down on him. Therefore sometimes when Louis is in the walk-in freezer, he keeps himself warm with thoughts of punching his Boarding School Face. And the day he sees the douche walk into the cafe with someone new, he decides he can’t stomach the idea of his new partner going on unawares of just what a douche he’s on a date with.

in the right place and time by weareonceinalifetime | M | 4790 Louis is a barista. Harry is a regular with bad taste in clothes who really likes coconut milk dirty chais. Somehow it works.

I Kinda Need A Hero (Is It You) by FallingLikeThis | nr | 5311 Louis is a barista who’s had his heart broken. Harry is the boy who wants to put the pieces back together.

Stay forever by allwaswell16 | E | 6481 For the last year and a half, Harry has spent his coffee break at the same cafe every day, not because he loves their coffee, but rather because of the gorgeous omega behind the counter making the coffees. As a beta, he’s sure he doesn’t stand a chance with him, so he goes online to find as close a substitute as possible. A camboy au

Nothing Please Me More Than You by lululawrence | M | 8196 This guy came in every day and without fail said or did something that made Louis pause and puzzle over what it meant. His accent was American, but it had to be some regional dialect from nearby or something because everything sounded sharper when he spoke. A little more crisp. Like he’d worked with one of those dialect coaches that had been used when talking pictures first started being made. Louis shook his head and tried to rid himself of lectures from the film history course he’d taken last semester. It obviously had no bearing on what was going on with hot dude in the corner. Still, Louis would love to pick his brain and figure out where he was from. How his hair always looked so perfect. If he liked to kiss boys. Or...the one where Louis is a barista and Harry is the hot dude that comes in every day and does nothing except sit in the corner, writing in his notebook, all day long. But what Louis learns when he sneaks a peek inside the notebook changes everything.

Dust on the Road. by Velvetoscar | nr | 18308 Louis is definitely fine and Lottie is definitely crushing on her French teacher, and these two things have nothing to do with each other. Except they do. And Louis is not fine.

I Really Like Your Styles: The Baking Advent-ure by homosociallyyours | T | 34322 Louis isn't much for frills, and the coffee shop he co-owns with his best friend Liam is evidence of that. Yes, it's got a decent sized, well-kept industrial kitchen, but Louis insists that people come to coffee shops for coffee, not mediocre pastry and plastic wrapped cookies. When Liam's campaign for serving treats turns into watching a few baking accounts on whichever popular app he's on, there's one that really gets on Louis' nerves: "I Like Your Styles." With his chipper demeanor and over the top descriptions of the food he makes, Louis is sure that the (unfortunately cute) baker is full of it. Nothing that adorable could possibly be worth the hype. It doesn't actually take much for him to eat his words...and some quality baked goods, while he's at it.

#coffee shop au #homosociallyyours #velvetoscar #lululawrence #allwaswell16 #FallingLikeThis #weareonceinalifetime #LadyLondonderry #disgruntledkittenface #yesisaworld #I Really Like Your Styles: The Baking Advent-ure #dust on the road. #Nothing Please Me More Than You #stay forever #I Kinda Need A Hero (Is It You) #in the right place and time #Matcha Me and Matcha You #tell me what you need #falling for you

[clhampir]

one of my least favorite themes about the internet lately is non-american people complaining that americans are talking about american-centric issues on the internet and being like "nOt EvErYtHiNg ReVoLvEs ArOuNd YoU iDiOtS" and it's like. yeah buddy. that's why we didn't apply it to anywhere else in the world. we're talking about the specific issues we are facing as americans living in the states. the reading comprehension is atrocious

#like idk how to tell you that not every american you interact with is gonna be living a rich life in a mega mansion free from strife #the vast majority of us are living under a religious rule disguised as democracy with our own police force killing us in droves every day #your biased view of the states as this place with no pain and suffering is harmful and people are dying in our streets #and its always from these people who think they're communists who care about the collective good and i just. man. i don't understand #i don't understand the disconnect. we're a part of this conversation too the real issues we face are getting real people killed #especially when its coming from leftist non-americans to leftists americans. its like #you KNOW i don't support my country why are you berating me for talking about the real problems we're facing? #individual leftist americans don't make the policies that are killing other countries and i think those conversations are allowed to be two #separate entities without people screaming at us for talking about the atrocities we're facing just bc our government that we have lost #control of is doing things we do not consent or agree to #like fuck dude. americans are still PEOPLE #we are still SUFFERING #and to be clear this isn't to take away from suffering from anyone else this is specifically about when someone from the states complains #about something happening IN THE STATES and non-americans butt in to make a comment about it not being all about us like #baby WHAT #anyways whatever i'm tired i'm going to bed

[boimgfrog]

my bf is kind but he's never rly thought abt any social justice stuff before meeting me beyond like the basic average decent person shit, so I always love discussing politics w him because there's smthn so incredibly satisfying about explaining how fucked up something is and having the other person be like "damn, that's fucked up, what can we do about it?" instead of immediately going on the defensive and being like "well I don't think it's that deep. and it's just the way the world works. stop being so sensitive." which is maybe a low bar but. sadly one that not many people I've met can cross.

#jay says a thing #i was explaining how recent laws being passed are expressely trying to ban trans ppl without explicitly banning trans people #and he was like shiiiit...thats insane i never knew that... #or like we were talking abt how our local native tribes arent recognized by the state and how the usa is actively still #engaging in native american erasure #and he was fucking flabbergasted #but again very receptive and righteously angry #love this dude #boytoy tag

[skrunksthatwunk]

kinda drives me up a wall when people go "hey i think x action in a war/combat scenario is inhumane and cruel and shitty" and someone responds with "oh but within the laws of war it's allowed or there's procedure for it etc etc". it doesn't have to be a war crime to be unforgivable man it's a shitty rulebook anyway

#like whether or not something's bad isn't determined by whether or not it adheres to arbitrary rules people made up and never obey #i thought we all knew that already. c'mon man. get a grip #obviously war crimes are bad but that's not where the badness potential ends y'know #this post is due to my dad talking about smth i sent him mentioning US troops firing on a bunch of guys in smth on deserters and he was lik #well they're not like citizens or refugees or deserters they're retreating enemy combattants. so it's different. #it IS different but isn't it still like. overly brutal? idk. #like would you want them to pursue Your ppl regardless? are they not allowed mercy just because you proved stronger? your positions could #be swapped easily and you'd think that as fellow combattants you would feel that deeply. idk maybe i'm just too soft or whatever but like. #seems stupid to me. war generally seems stupid to me but this specifically right now seems stupid to me #yes i know there are practical concerns and sacrifices in combat that make sense when you're actually there and me saying there should be n #wars and we should make it a fucking priority to not have wars doesn't mean ppl already in a decision-making role in the field should do #what i (an idealist) would do. they're responsible for minimizing loss and shit. whatever. doesn't mean it's not fucked up anyway. #and that's assuming the best case scenario for a leader in such a position. usually they just want to minimize Their side's losses. usually #by maximizing the other side's. or they just want to win and will sacrifice anyone for it if it's practical #which happens a Lot. usually it's a mix of the latter two to my understanding #as if americans' lives matter more than anyone else's and the other side doesn't have a right to mourn bc they offended us somehow #ugh that shit irks me so bad dude. there'll be like a terrorist attack in europe or smth and the news'll be like #ONE AMERICAN WAS KILLED. and twenty swiss. THE AMERICAN WAS VISITING FAMILY THERE ON SUNDAY MORNING WHEN TRAGEDY STRUCK etc etc #fucking hate that. i don't care if they're on 'my team' or whatever they're all equally human and equally dead #why the hell should i care if one of them was an american. just say 21 people died. like i get reporting on it briefly ig to like notify #ppl At Best but like. it's so grating. why can't you be normal about other people fucking goddamn you #why is this a controversial statement. why is giving a shit about people killing each other (often for like 10 ppl's financial gain) wrong #like. come on. i don't care if they 'deserve it' or whatever because i don't think they do. and even if they Did i don't think it's #America's Time To Step Up!!! every time smth like this happens (but only when it is financially beneficial to us to do so #such that we ignore atrocities all the fucking time bc it's inconvenient. we're not superheros. we're cops.) #not saying america shouldn't do anything bc like. idk. you screw everyone over to have all the power maybe you should use that influence fo #good. but my definition of 'good' is wayyyy way different from everybody who's ever held office here apparently so like. nuts to that #eugh. anyway im cutting myself off here rant over. for now

[magnoliamyrrh]

thats why it hurts my brain too when ppl have intense ass arguments abt what race specific "hard to classify" groups are

the balkans are just one example of this bc weve been considered a bunch of shit throughout history and we exist in a weird position always but. there are So Many ethnic groups and regions of the world which are like this

and ppl will go on entire things with the upmost seriousness trying to "race" whatever ethnicity when its like....... dude do you not understand.... does the entire argument itself not make you see.... this is all made up and this conversation makes no damn sense bc there isnt actually any sort of biological basis that this shit is based on ,, ,,, race is Largely some bullshit made up for the sake of oppression and youre trying So Hard to shove ppl into it instead of understanding the complexities of the situation...why..... pls stop

#are somalis black or arab? god i wish we could just stop w this also as if there aren't afro arabs as if historically #what we call arabs arent one of the fitst ppls out of africa as if there arent dark skinned arabs w curly hair #as if there isnt MORE diversity between africans than there is with non africans 😭😭 bro black or even african isnt any race theyre the #oldest ppl on earth the amount of genetic variation is insaaaneee #does the endless conversation itself not show this is a social issue not a real biological issue ppl are being shoved into and shoving #themselves into???? #are balkan ppl white. are slavs white. #dude what the fuck is the white race. weve been considereded white recently were also not like???? #are the kuchi people of aghanistan and india white? asian? #this entire convo is stupid race isnt a thing they are people they are a nomadic ethnic group w a history #STOP #are indigenous americans asians or indigenous??? well they come from asians but again this convo goes in circles bc neither asian or native #american as a Race is an actual thing that Exists #Race is some bullshit made up for oppression and which largely still exists today for oppression Or in the best case scenario to #classify broad groups of ppl together based on looks #but its not a Real Thing with Real Definine Lines and Real Biology which there are Real Answers To

[yellobb]

American “healthcare” can go fuck itself please and thank you

#m rambles #politics #I went to an urgent care because my cough had lasted over three weeks #I was there for less than an hour #I have good fucking health insurance #I left with a paper that said my bill was $0 #which I guess was just what I owed that day #because I just got notified that I owe over $200 #called them to make sure my insurance was applied and it was #the original visit cost was almost A THOUSAND #fuck this dude #I’ve learned not to go back to urgent care unless I’m literally dying because Christ that’s ridiculous #and I know it’s common knowledge that American healthcare sucks ass #but I was still really taken aback by this #like????? #what the hell are people supposed to do if they DONT have insurance? #if even me with my nice $65/mo healthcare plan has to think twice about going to the doctor #universal healthcare is a human right and fuck anyone who thinks otherwise

[nunap]

If they make u pay 100 euros for XH if they'll ever let skz come to 1 city for the whole continent of euroasia how much will they charge a mega gazillion? In a full recession? With 2 major conflicts going on??? 2€ for a lt of gas???? I went to buy bread and I had to sell my first born

#the thing is that this backfires in europe. americans just pay 10000euros and still go #we are more like dude fuck off imma stay home also bc people need to travel to places #but skz will never come in southern Europe so

[tinycoffeeroom]

just friends | lando norris

face claim: none ♡

request: here !

part 2 !

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📍 sass cafe, monaco

👤 bffstagram, landonorris liked by bffstagram, landonorris and 59,203 others

y/nstagram dj lando came out of retirement for the night🤠

landonorris 😎 only for you xx ↳ y/nstagram i'm honoured mr norris 🫡 ↳ fan i love my besties who don't know they're my besties

bffstagram bro my tummy hurts ↳ y/nstagram i'm coming round with coffee and croissants you big baby ↳ bffstagram i love my gf ♥️ y/nstagram

fan i wanna party with y/nlando so BAD dude ↳ y/nstagram if you ever find yourself in monaco hmu xx

user ew flipping off the camera so ladylike ↳ y/nstagram idk your mum quite likes my fingers 🫶 ↳ fan ☠️☠️☠️ i love her

fan bffstagram is so hot, i need her ↳ bffstagram thank u babycakes 💗

liked by bffstagram, lilymhe and 69,928 others

y/nstagram rainy days in monaco 🌧️

lilymhe i deserve financial compensation for the emotional turmoil tfios sent me through ↳ y/nstagram don't,,, sat and sobbed my eyes out at the last 100 pages

fan how to lose a guy in 10 days... tfios... who hurt you y/n? ↳ y/nstagram hahahah nothing like that! i promise i'm all good!

bffstagram i still have a headache from crying at that book, next time i choose what we're reading for book club ↳ y/nstagram BORINGGGGG who doesn't love doomed romance? ↳ fan you guys have a book club? thats so cute 😭 ↳ y/nstagram yep! it's me, bff, kika, lily and flavy!! ↳ alexandrasaintmleux and no one thought to invite me?? ↳ y/nstagram come join us babe!! ❤️

landonorris wow, didn't take you for a sappy romance reader ↳ y/nstagram there's a lot you don't know about me comment deleted ↳ y/nstagram tfios can make even the iciest bitch cry (it's me, i'm the icy bitch)

landonorris also answer ur damn texts ↳ y/nstagram sorry idk how to read suddenly ↳ fan The Lando Norris gets aired, there's hope for the rest of the bitchless community ↳ landonorris dude...

liked by fan, fan and 103,028 others

f1gossip Eagle eyed Sass Cafe goers managed to capture Lando Norris getting cosy with an unknown blonde girl. Rumoured girlfriend Y/N L/N was nowhere to be seen. Trouble in paradise for the young duo?

fan delete this rn y'all are fucking up my y/nlando chances

fan rumoured girlfriend?? i thought they were just friends ↳ fan that's what they both say, but they're always very close whenever they've been seen out together ↳ fan i'm pretty sure there was like a super grainy photo of them kissing but you can't really tell if it's either of them ↳ fan hey how about we don't speculate on people's love lives???

fan y/n has been absent from social media for like a month too ... its so over for us y/nlando'ers

fan her instagram is girlstagram! from what i could see before she went private, she posted a selfie of her and lando and they looked very close ↳ fan damn the fbi needs to hire you or smth

liked by bffstagram, estebanocon and 65,928 others

y/nstagram thuggin it out (i've listened to your best american girl 34 times today i think bffstagram is about to smother me with a pillow)

fan um who hurt my bestie ???

fan whoever hurt y/n must die at the hand of my sword

fan lando norris i am in your walls FIX THIS

bffstagram i would never smother you xx also come out of ur room it is boring as FUCK out here ↳ y/nstagram damn cant a girl go through it in peace? ↳ bffstagram absolutely not, i have wine and nibbles get out here NEOOWWW or i'm breaking into ur room ↳ y/nstagram the door is open babygirl

fan ik this is a parasocial friendship but are you ok y/n? ☹️ we love you ↳ y/nstagram oh sweetie ❤️ i'll be fine, sometimes you just gotta be a lil sad y'know? thank you for asking, ily ❤️ ↳ fan ily, take care of yourself 🥺 ♥️ y/nstagram

estebanocon chérie, i don't know what's wrong but i hope you're ok! lets grab coffee soon, flavy misses you! ☺️ ↳ y/nstagram thank u este 🫶🥺 text me when you're free! tell flavy i love her 💗 ↳ flavy.barla i love you too 💕 ♥️ y/nstagram

fan no lando like, i have one (1) fear ↳ fan do not even speak that into the universe

fan after f1gossips post, i have my speculations ↳ fan dude, if he fumbled y/n he really will be lando nowins

liked by flavy.barla, francisca.c.gomes and 10 others

y/npriv absolutely not thuggin it out lads

flavy.barla chouchou (sweetheart) 💔 that's it, me and este are taking you out for lunch tomorrow ↳ y/nstagram nooo don't let me ruin your date time!! ↳ flavy.barla nope it's already done! este's booked that little restaurant you like on pl. du casino ↳ y/nstagram le salon rose?? oh i could do a little weep, i love you guys 😭 ↳ flavy.barla we love you so so much y/n 💕

lilymhe i will hit him with my golf clubs ↳ y/nstagram i haven't even mentioned anyone? ↳ lilymhe we all know their name rhymes with bando borris ↳ y/nstagram wdym we all know? who else knows? ↳ flavy.barla ... me ↳ alexandrasaintmleux ^ ↳ francisca.c.gomes ^ ↳ lilynzeimer ^ ↳ heidiberger_ ^ ↳ carmenmmundt ^ ↳ kellypiquet ^ ↳ iamrebeccad ^ ↳ y/nstagram ok ok i get it damn

kellypiquet want me to ask max to rear end him with his race car? ↳ y/nstagram as if max would ever be behind lando ↳ kellypiquet 😳😳😳 ↳ y/nstagram i may l*ve him but i am also a realist ↳ y/nstagram ok no i do feel bad

y/nstagram uploaded to their story

[caption 1: love of my life, apple of my eye, the thelma to my louise 💖 @/flavy.barla] [caption 2: damn stole my girl from right in front of me 😔 @/estebanocon @/flavy.barla]

seen by landonorris, flavy.barla and 67,394 others

flavy.barla mon ange (my angel), you know you're the only one for me 💕 ↳ y/nstagram tell that to your giant of a boyfriend :(

estebanocon i'm not a giant 😠 ↳ y/nstagram stop reading flavy's messages weirdo ↳ y/nstagram but on a real note, thank you for dinner, i really needed it ↳ estebanocon of course, i'm not sure what lando's done but we hate seeing you so sad ↳ y/nstagram who said it had anything to do with lando? ↳ estebanocon whenever me and flavy have an argument she pulls out the mitski lyrics, i know the signs ↳ y/nstagram that's different, you and flavy are dating ↳ estebanocon and you and lando aren't???? ↳ y/nstagram what? no? we're just friends ↳ estebanocon oh mon amie naïve (my naive friend) friends don't look at each other the way the two of you do

landonorris can we talk? seen

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anyone interested in a part 2?

#lando norris x reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris fanfic #lando norris social media au #f1 imagine #f1 smau #f1 social media au

[bamber344]

people who claim that arthur morgan would've been homophobic/transphobic like to conveniently forget, uhhh, pretty much his entire character

dude was in a gang (and was friendly) with black and native american people at a time where racism was still generally the rule rather than the exception. He enthusiastically participated in a women's suffrage protest! His whole fucking set of ideals was about standing up for freedom against the encroaching spread of 'civilised society,' where laws would discriminate against those they deemed 'unfit,' like arthur and his gang, like black and native american people, like women, and Obviously - though the modern terminology obviously wouldn't have existed at that time - like gay and trans people.

His whole thing was about living life as you saw fit, without The Man holding you down! Yeah sure he'd probably make some tasteless jokes here and there, he's certainly not a saint, but outright homophobic or transphobic? not a fucking chance!

#rdr2 #arthur morgan #red dead redemption 2 #charthur is at least partially canon and you cannot change my mind #they were totally both thinking about it #charles smith #charthur

[inkskinned]

"it's so embarrassing you like that popular thing" "oh ew that geeky/strange thing is so cringe lol" "oh it's kind of weird you get excited about that harmless shit"

dude i love how ironic and jaded you are and that's so cool and sexy of you. and i am so so glad to tell you - you won!! we all had a meeting and we decided that you won, and we are writing your name on the inside of a burger king crown. the marker smeared, sorry, but we knew any form of real effort is ugly to you. but anyway. congrats! you are officially the coolest, most ironic, most jaded person in-the-world-right-now. we would throw you a party but you would think it was totally boring - and besides, we're weird so we wouldn't have been coming. we would have brought our love of beetles and of baking and of little canapes. we would have brought our artsy videogames and pages of writing. we would have written a poem with you, our hands covered in ink, and spread out a canvas to dance on, the night so lurid and pink.

but do not worry. we will not throw the party. we will just get you a ringlight and that crown i mentioned. it is a nice crown, except for where one of us dropped it.

the vote was a really hard one because we had so many cool ironic people to pick off the shelves. all of you have hands that rot fruit, how strange is that - you can't look at something without destroying it for other people. you like it when you can squeeze a person into a pinpoint - all us small ones scampering our little feet around our ugly joys. the vote was also a hard one because we kept our voices down because you don't like it when we talk too loud. you were on your phone at the time, talking to people other than us. you are a ghoul of every moment - half in, half out, you resent us for being here without shame or embarrassment.

so good news! we have invented an island for people like you. you get to go there and speak into the air things like if you still like watching harmless twitch streamers in 2023 you're fucking boring. you will say things like liveplay podcasts are fucking ugly and it's kind of awkward they try to make everything gay. on the island we made you, all of your words will have weight. they will form in the air like icicles, large white behemoth letters that will crumple in anvils around your feet. maybe we will send someone there once in a while to sweep, but honestly you might be there for a while, alone, waiting. we are busy being outside looking for mushrooms and flapping our hands and humming. we are busy kicking our little heels while we watch cringey tv. we are busy - sorry! as an apology, we have pre-filled the island with every bland, mediocre, unscented thing we could find. the island has the texture of american cheese. the island has an ocean that never gets angry. the island is perfect for you, trust me. you will be so happy there - as happy as you can be, ironically.

we want to say we are sorry for doing harmless things that you find annoying, childish, or unappealing - but we are not sorry. we thought we could help you, because we don't mind laughing at ourselves, but it turns out you are allergic to color and noise and atmosphere, so this is the best that we can do for now. we are all making a big shirt that says i voted in the ironic monarchy. we got you one that is just a fast fashion buttondown. i am so excited for you and this island and the big life you have won. you have a cool jaded grey life and miles of irony to roam. i love you! be well.

now leave us alone.

#spilled ink #writeblr #slam poetry #i started this as a joke and ended up taking after #the poem about all the women in the world meeting in the bathroom #i can't find it to link it directly i've been googling for like 15 minutes if someone can remember #turns out frantically googling the only lines like ''women meeting in the bathroom'' #''secret womens meeting you always believed happened" is not useful for . to search??? help :( #also the reason this says harmless so many times is bc like #this is 100% about like #yeah man when ppl are mean about ppl enjoying things like. fuckin lady gaga #like this is so obviously about ppl who steal ur joy for no reason (i WILL steal ur joy if ur a bigot btw) #also yes it's bc someone was like ''liking the mcelroys in 2023 is cringe'' #and im like. dude what the fuck literally just let people like things it's LITERALLY not that deep. #like i dont like centipedes theyre one of like the 2 bugs im squicked out by ... but like. #if u really like centipedes. im like so happy for you. i hope you can put socks on ur centipedes #so they can speedclean ur floors. that would be fun and cool!!! #i love u i hope all of you have a weird passion i love you i hope that passion fills your life like soap bubbles

[seshissushi]

Dude Macklemore is kinda a piece of shit.

Here you have all these black artists calling someone out for glorifying traumatic realities of black Americans and reminding many non black Americans that these communities are STILL suffering

And then here comes Macklemore riding on the tails of black artists like he always has. I’m not saying wanting a ceasefire is bad- but demanding it by DIRECTLY putting down something that multiple black artists have deemed important enough to speak out about is fucking gross.

He didn’t have to bring up Kendrick and Drake, he not have to insert himself as a white man into a feud about someone glorifying black pain and he definitely didn’t have to make it out to seem unimportant compared to ‘real’ problems. He could have put out music and done a fundraiser without putting down black artists.

And the worst part is it’s just a reminder of how much people will actually listen to black voices.

You can care about multiple problems at once without putting one down

#kendrick lamar #drake #macklemore #hip hop

[forellasket]

hi!! what about like a body swap w the jjk guys wouldnt that be fun. like a curse with a weird technique got to us and blah blah (you can wrote whoeverr but megumi would be nice <3)

JJK Boys React to:

Body Swap CT!!

MEGUMI—

ok first off i just wanna say that he would need a factory reset after realizing what happened

megumi would look at you, then down at himself, then back at you about a thousand times

it feels weird being in someone else’s skin, he would try not to let it show how uncomfortable he would feel

he really doesn’t know what to do with himself. it’s not even a matter of trying to respect your body since it’s his for the time being

he just loathes the feeling of invading it

that is…

until he notices that his— no, your body gets all hot and fluttery when he’s around you

it’s strange. why is he getting flustered by his own face? it’ll eventually click that it’s just your body’s instinct to get nervous around him

now he can only stand there and wonder what his body is doing to you

ITADORI—

oh boy.

my only words of wisdom in this situation are good luck.

right off the bat when he realizes he’s not in his own body anymore, he loses his shit

if you’re a woman, he 100% feels the need to touch his chest. having boobs is crazy

he’s known for being a reckless dude so when he’s running around in your body, expect to have several unknown bruises

i feel like he’d try to do shit he normally does and forget that he doesn’t have his usual heightened abilities and then whine when he hurts himself, or technically you

he’ll apologize profusely for the damage done, and start going on and on about how you can beat him up when you guys switch back

GOJO—

he’ll just flirt with you/himself the whole time. that’s it. he’ll compliment your beautiful new blue eyes or how tall you’ve become over night.

he’s makes those “looking in a mirror” jokes and thinks he’s the funniest person alive.

spoiler alert; he isn’t.

INUMAKI—

this time it’s your turn to fuck up

he literally speaks in ingredients, and you don’t.

straight off the bat you start freaking out and talking like you usually do and the poor people around you suffer for it

also inumaki, his throat is gonna hurt REAL bad

but now he’s embracing his inner american with the freedom of speech!! 🦅🇺🇸🔥

he abuses the fact that he can talk normally for once without drawbacks and he YAPS

all day

to anyone willing to listen

that’s not to say he isn’t still quiet though, you’ll strain yourself trying to hear him

he gets real sad when you guys swap back

NANAMI—

oh he’s so respectful about it.

keeps reassuring you all day that everything will be fine— although it’s a little awkward trying to comfort himself…

he’s definitely stiff as hell with everything he does, similar to megumi

bro goes into robot mode, and is so uncomfortable

literally doesn’t know how to take care of your body because anything and everything feels illegal

he can’t eat or drink because then he’ll have to go to the bathroom, and that’s an invasion of privacy

but he can’t let your body starve so then what

the man is stressed

he spends a lot of time silently panicking and trying to swap yall back

here lies nanami kento R.I.P 🪦

TODO—

this one is solely for shits and giggles.

if you’re not a tall woman with a big ass, he spends the whole time complaining. that’s it pt. 2

i’m so deadass he whines the whole time about how he misses his body and that this sucks and he’d much prefer he’d gotten to swap with takada

and blah blah blah

YUTA—

he’s so nervous

it feels wrong

he’s not worried about his body, just yours

he’s not worried about how he feels, just how you feel

he’s trying to make sure you’re okay, but it’s weird talking to you when you’re wearing his face

and vice versa

you can’t really feel comforted when you’re looking down at yourself having a panic attack

you two feed on each other’s nervous energies and eventually descend into madness

i feel bad for everyone who has to take care of you during this

#jjk x you #jjk x reader #jjk #jjk gojo #megumi x reader #megumi fushiguro #yuuji x reader #itadori yuuji #gojo x reader #gojo satoru #todo jjk #nanami kento #nanami x reader #inumaki toge #inumaki x reader #yuta x reader #jjk yuta #yuta okkotsu #jujutsu kaisen

[snootlestheangel]

Hear Me Out

Guys, just, hear me out: YouTubers/Streamers AU for COD. There was a series of posts on @cod-dump 's blog about what games are banned for the boys and I've just been thinking about this but with Ghost, Gaz, Soap, and Alex where one of them is the actual streamer/gamer dude and the others just almost always play with him (maybe Roach if we went on the path that he's not actually mute, just kinda hates talking)

Retired or discharged for whatever reasons, the 141 are actually kinda happy to be living semi-normal lives. Maybe they're not all entirely civilian now, maybe Price has a position that doesn't require him to be on the field but he's still teaching/being a Captain.

But he's constantly telling the boys to find things to do to keep themselves happy. Especially Gaz and Soap, cause the military is kind of all they know, they've never had to be civilians really as adults.

Ghost is transitioning fine, and he's been a huge help for Soap, but Gaz is still kinda struggling. Eventually something happens and Alex is part of his life, but it's still not really what Gaz needs to feel "normal".

So Soap and Alex convince Gaz to start streaming/recording videos of their gaming sessions. It's a slow start, and Gaz is getting frustrated.

Until one time they play something silly but incredibly rage-inducing. It's a trending game because it's designed to pit you against your friends but is still silly nonetheless. There's one clip in particular that starts trending and becomes the reason Gaz's channel starts to take off.

The clip? Gaz yelling at Soap for something and Soap immediately just cursing him out in straight Scots only for Alex, an American, to scream into his mic as loud as humanly possible "WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETER?!?!" after having been dead silent for the last 2 minutes. Why did he scream this? Not because of Soap's Scots, but because he had secretly just won the round after having lost the entire time they'd been playing.

People eat that shit up! Suddenly everyone's like "damn there's this hella attractive dude that records gameplay with his friends and they're all really funny." Everyone falls in love with Gaz's appearance first, but then they actually hear him and his friends interact and it's just trading insults and stupid jokes, acting like there's no one watching and they're suddenly kids again.

It eventually comes out that Gaz and his friends are all veterans, and despite the air around military not being the best, there's no denying that caring for veterans is a must. People slowly start to support Gaz's channel/streams, and before he knows it, he's actually got quite the following. His whole thing is about "wanting to do something to distract himself and others from the shitty aspects of life with a few laughs and some good games"

Eventually they convince Ghost to start gaming with them. It makes Gaz's popularity grow because now there's this really deep accent in the mix that's completely clueless as to what he's doing like 90% of the time (I just have this gut feeling that '22 Ghost is so fucking awful at video games) that they refer to simply as "Ghost". Suddenly, the chaos Gaz and his friends are known for increases tenfold. Ghost is flirting with all of them, Soap is arguing with him over literal couple things that come with living together, and there's a new element of really dark humor that wasn't there before (there was dark humor, just not this dark)

They're playing The Backrooms one time. They're not even in the game yet, just in the lobby. Gaz is laughing at Alex's tag for the game "MYLEG!" which is a reference to that one fish in Spongebob always yelling "my leg!" after an incident. Gaz is laughing too hard to actually explain to his viewers that, yes, Alex is an amputee. Soap starts making fun of him, as usual, and that's when it happens.

Alex: "I'll take my leg off and hit you with it, Soap, I swear to god." Soap: "I forgot you were already missing one for a second there and got real concerned." Alex: "No, Soap, I planned on removing my other leg. The one that's still attached, yeah. Just like a lil *pop noise*, ya know?" Gaz: *wheezing so hard he almost throws up*

Then they're playing this silly monster/cryptid hunter game called "A Day Out" and there's skeletons every now and then on the map. Gaz walks up to one and just starts freaking out, saying Ghost's name over and over.

Ghost, freaked out: What?? Gaz, pointing at the skeleton: Look, it's you! *cackling* Ghost, after a concerning long pause: *quietly* Nah, I'm not gonna say that Alex: SAY IT COWARD Ghost: No, that's my brother *Gaz making the most horrified face as he tries not to laugh* *Alex and Soap are losing their shit* Gaz: NAH THAT'S NOT OKAY

That clip posts and the internet looses it. I see this being the actual first video Ghost is in, so for this to be the first thing the viewers get of him, it's safe to say he's a hit. It's also never explained that Ghost does have a deceased brother, so there's just an acceptance of Ghost's skeleton brother.

There's several times where they've all gotten together and played silly games like Mario Kart when there's a bunch of them. There's the sober one and there's the drunk one, where there's so many different languages being hurled as curses at each other, Gaz gives up on captioning ANY of it.

OOOOooooooooohhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! WHAT IF! Roach becomes his editor once he gets popular enough so he can spend more time playing games, solo ones when the others are working.

For a while, everyone's going crazy wanting to see what the others all look like, and sometimes (cause we're assuming the world they live in now during all this is a lot better), they're joined by Rudy or Alejandro, or both in one rare instance. Sometimes, for old times's sake, during the drunk gaming sessions, they'll call Laswell only for her to scold them. There are times they'll bully Roach who always, as the editor, changes their words from the insults to compliments. Or he definitely trolls Gaz a lot with some of the editing, and it's all around just a good time. Hence why everyone wants to know what they look like.

Then it's around the holidays after about 2 and a half years of Gaz's channel being as popular as it is. He posts a single picture on his socials with a group of people and the caption: "Love seeing the boys over the holidays."

It's such a nice photo; Alex with an arm wrapped around Gaz's shoulders, Soap and Ghost on his other side with Roach between Soap and Gaz.

And the internet has once again gone crazy. Why? Cause not only are these dudes fucking hilarious, but they're hot and taken.

Except, as they all end up teasing him about, Roach is very much still single XD

I have been watching too much YouTube lately, can y'all tell?? Haha anyways back to my hole I shall crawl

#I don't know what this is #I just kinda threw something up cause the brainworms need to be released regularly #kyle gaz garrick #cod gaz #gaz cod #gaz call of duty #gaz modern warfare #gaz mw2 #gaz is a gamer #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soapghost #ghostsoap #alex keller #call of duty alex keller #gazalex #au? #civilian au #cod incorrect quotes

[guillotinebypierre]

Club culture was a crazy thing.

Especially in South Korea, where apparently young people only knew how to socialise if alcohol was involved.

Y/n was not a fan of clubs. Never had been and he had sworn to himself that he would never be a fan. Good thing the place they were going to was no club.

"Yo Y/n are you busy next weekend?", his friend Jongin asked him. Yes, THE Jongin, as in Kai from EXO.

Y/n worked as a photographer. A very good one at that. So good in fact, that Kai requested him to become his personal photographer after a fateful photoshoot for his solo debut, thus creating a somewhat surprising friendship. To Y/n, Jongin was just another regular dude who was a really nice person but could also be a fucking pain in the ass. He could, however, not deny that he enjoyed the behind the scenes looks he was able to get by knowing someone in the industry.

"No I'm free, all my schedules for photoshoots end on friday. Why'd you ask, though? You have something in mind?", Y/n asked while mindlessly scrolling through his Instagram home page.

"I was invited to a party, and I want you to come with me-"

"Jongin you know I don't do well with alcohol and clubs", Y/n cut him off.

"Dude, relax! It's not a club and nobody is gonna force alcohol down your throat. It's just a simple get together between me and my friends! Nothing over the top, I promise.", he reassured him.

This seemed like a trap. All of Y/n's alarms were ringing but, for whatever reason, he decided to go with it and agree.

And that brings us back to the start of the story. Y/n and Jongin sat in the back of a black limousine that was driving them to a huge mansion in a rather secluded, gated community a bit away from central Seoul. The area was quite beautiful, luxurious houses equipped with the most insane looking backyards, pools, basketball, tennis and football fields Y/n had ever seen before. Palm trees everywhere, something very out of character for Seoul. It was almost as if they had tried to mimic an American aesthetic or whatever.

The two men continued being driven up the seemingly never ending hill, Jongin being all giggly and basically jumping around in joy like a small child whose mother had just allowed him to eat candy for dinner. As the pair's chauffeur suddenly stopped the car, dread started filling Y/n's thoughts as he became self conscious and felt underdressed. He was wearing a simple outfit, consisting of a black Prada polo shirt that hugged his muscular chest and biceps while accentuating his small waist. He had on black dress pants with a designer belt and to top it all off some Prada loafers.

Jongin originally told him to dress casual but he still felt like, given the circles Jongin tends to hang out in, he should make himself presentable. They got out of the car and it was as if Y/n was shellshocked. They stood in a cul de sac, around them similar expensive limousines transporting all kinds of celebrities. Y/n looked around at the estate in front of him, loud music blasting out of the open windows and doors while atmospheric lights bathed the room in a sultry and sensual ambience.

He looked around once more, now acknowledging the people who were attending this 'party'. He saw members of NCT, people he was all too familiar with due to doing photoshoots for their most recent album. He also saw multiple girl groups, most noticeably Red Velvet and TWICE. The former of which he had known very well, the ladder of which being an almost unachievable dream of his as apparently JYPE had some kind of policy prohibiting them from hiring him due to him having worked with their 'rivals'.

"Dude are you just gonna stare or are you going to join me and get your ass inside?", Jongin said while smirking at him.

"What happened to the 'simple get together', Kai?"

This was a bad sign for Jongin. Y/n only ever used his stage name when he fucked up.

"Alright hear me out, I had to lie! You wouldn't have come otherwise and you would've missed out on so much fun man", Jongin tried to explain himself while pulling Y/n inside the mansion.

As they got inside Y/n immediately smelled the alcohol in the air, paired with the smell of greasy food, curtesy of the amount of pizzas and fried chicken laid out on the tables for the guests to eat. He hated to admit it but these celebrities sure knew how to throw a party.

---------------------------------------------------

The night picked up pace incredibly quickly, the onslaught of new guests apparently being over. It was going on full blast, drunk idols making out and laughing like maniacs wherever one would look. Y/n, still without a single ounce of alcohol inside his system, had lost sight of his friend. He thought that Jongin was either passed out drunk, getting laid or was kidnapped, and decided to just go outside and relax by the pool.

He stood at the edge of the backyard, overlooking the city, which was now only visible due to its skyscrapers and bright lights illuminating the dark sky. He sighed, battling himself mentally on whether to call it a day or not and just go home without Jongin before a raspy voice interrupted his thought process.

"I've never seen you before, at these kinds of parties, you know? Are you a newly debuted idol?"

"Oh no I'm not an idol at all, just a plus one-"

"Well Mr. Plus One, mind if I take the spot next to you?", she interrupted him.

"Sure"

She stepped up next to him, allowing him to take a clear look at her face and finally getting him to realise who he was talking to the whole time.

Hirai Momo. Momoring. The Dancing Mochine. Twice's Main Dancer. 1/3 of the JLine, whatever you want to call her.

"What's up tiger? Cat got your tongue?", she asked him as she turned to face him.

"No I just didn't expect to speak to someone like you tonight-"

"What's that supposed to mean", she asked fake insulted

"That I didn't expect to meet an A-lister tonight

She smiled at him, a small blush forming on her cheeks, either from his compliment or the alcohol being breathed in like air at this party.

The night continued like this for the pair as they got to know each other more and more. They had chemistry together, their conversation bouncing off each other naturally and progressing naturally, neither one feeling bored and reciprocating each other's energy. The sound of the party behind them seemingly drowned out as they only had eyes for each other.

"You know Mr. Plus-One-"

"It's Y/n. Y/n L/n. Nice to meet you Ms. Hirai-"

"You can call me Momo, handsome", Momo said while starring into his eyes.

"As I was saying, what did you do to get to this party? Whose plus one are you exactly?"

"Jongin. Or Kai, from EXO. His name depends on how angry I am at him"

"Makes sense now. Of course someone like him would be friends with a guy as hot as you. What do you do for a living, Y/n. Like how did you get to meet someone in the industry?"

"I'm a photographer. I met Jongin back when he was doing photoshoots for his solo debut. He liked my work so much that he requested for me to be his personal photographer and SM kinda started using me for all their artists. I actually tried applying for JYPE, too, but they rejected me because I worked with SM before. Seems quite petty if you ask me", Y/n replied while taking the last sip of his water.

"You're telling me that I could've gotten your number before if that old geezer didn't have an ego the size of Seoul? I swear to god he will pay for his sins.", Momo replied while laughing and smiling at Y/n.

"Who says that you'd get my number? Someone's confident", Y/n teased her while raising an eyebrow

"Oh please, Y/n. I could get you naked and fuck you right here in front of everyone in like 3 minutes if I wanted to", Momo replied while smirking at him.

The two had moved closer together a while ago and where now touching skin on skin while speaking to each other.

Y/n looked down at Momo and saw her bite her lip while eyeing him up and down, her eyes trailing his lips, then his eyes and back to his lips again.

"Are you currently seeing someone?", she asked while backing off and slowly walking towards the hot tub.

"Nah I'm single. I'm looking for someone right now but there haven't been that many that have caught my attention"

"Am I one if them?"

"I think you can answer that question yourself, Momo"

They soon arrived at the hot tub, Momo bending down and taking off her clothes, exposing her red lacy underwear to him. She looked over her shoulder, seeing as Y/n shamelessly stared at her thick ass, almost as if he was in a trance.

"Are you just gonna watch or do you care to join me, pretty boy?", Momo asked while getting inside the hot tub.

This seemed to shake those thoughts off of Y/n as he began stripping down to his underwear and joined Momo. She swam over to him, her hand immediately interlocking behind his neck as she sat on his lap. She looked him in the eyes, almost waiting for him to make the first move.

"I want to fuck you right now", Y/n said, boldness somehow taking over.

"Then fuck me, baby", Momo said before smashing her lips on his.

They kissed, nay it was more like they tried sucking each other's face off, tongues battling for dominance as neither wanted to back down. Their hands roamed around each other's bodies, Y/n finding his way towards Momo's ass while Momo dug her nails into his wide back, marking her territory.

The pair continued making out as they explored their needs, pleasure taking over both of them as lust dictated their every move. Not wanting to lose any time, Momo unhooked her bra, throwing it away somewhere before pushing her panties to the side and fishing out Y/n's dick out of his underwear. She stroked his cock, getting it hard before aligning the tip and slamming herself down onto his length.

She underestimated how much she could take, closing her eyes in a mixture of pleasure and pain, before biting down onto his shoulder and taking a few moments to relax. Y/n felt her body on top of his as Momo slowly accustomed to his length and thickness before starting to ride him. She moved her hips in an expert way as she threw it back on him, her walls clamping down onto him with each lap she completed riding on top of him. He was so deep inside him that it drove her insane.

Momo leaned down, moaning and groaning into Y/n's ears as her face reddened even more, rivalling her underwear. She viciously rode him, her climax coming closer and closer as if it was inching towards a goal line, her moans becoming more sporadic and breathy rather than drawn out and controlled. Her ample breasts bounced as her breathing quickened, her pussy becoming tighter and tighter around Y/n before she let out one more loud scream in ecstasy and fell down on top of him. Y/n came, too, his cum dripping out and overflowing out of Momo's pussy as the pair caught their breath.

"Do- Do you happen to have a camera with you, Y/n?", Momo suddenly asked.

"Just my phone, why'd you ask?", he replied.

"We need to get a room. Follow me pretty boy"

The lovers jumped out of the hot tub, oblivious to the few idols who were sober enough to witness and register what had just occurred in front of them, before walking inside the mansion and up the stairs. The second floor of the house was somehow even more luxurious than the first one, expensive paintings and vases littered around the walls and floors, a red carpet going all the way to a big double door.

Momo limped towards the door, her legs being almost like jelly, before throwing the doors open and revealing a large king sized bed. She turned around and gestured for Y/n to close and lock the door before jumping on him and kissing him hungrily again.

Y/n walked forward, falling with Momo onto the bed before taking his lips and kissing, biting and licking every part of her body. Just as he was about to go down on her, however, she pulled his hair and said to him

"I've had enough foreplay, fuck me already"

Y/n took his dick, aligned it with her wet snatch and inserted it in her. Her back arched immediately, mouth forming an 'O' shape as her hands reached around to grab literally anything for support. He slowly picked up his pace, moving his hips while also applying force and slamming inside her, fucking her like he had some pain inside him.

Suddenly, he turner around, pushing her head down and having her ass up, before grabbing a fistful of her hair and taking out his phone. He hit record, the phone now picking up on the loud moans, in contrast to the quiet and breathy ones she had let out earlier in the hot tub, these ones seemed like they were for the entirety of Seoul to hear, so everyone knew who this dick belonged to. Y/n pulled her hair, making Momo look at him before letting go and going to town on her ass cheeks, slapping each of them with vigour as the skin rippled and the recoil moved like the waves in a still body of water after being disturbed. Her moans grew louder and more frantic, her eyes forming tears of pleasure as she once again tightened around his base and came with a lot scream of pleasure.

Momo took a few moments to regain her composure, before finding almost superhuman strength and flipping both of them over so now she was on top, riding Y/n like a Harley. She looked him in the eyes, a hungry expression on her face. Her juices flowed down her thighs, souvenirs of her prior climaxes as she began riding him without falling off. She decided to get nasty with him, spitting into his mouth before inserting her tongue in and playing with it, exchanging saliva with Y/n.

Her hips, once again, moved in a circular motion as she felt every single piece of her lovers dick, her insides memorising every vein, every inch stretching her out like nothing had before. Sweat beads trickled down her forehead, the two of them coated in a layer of it as the exercise tired them out. Her hands were on his abs for stability, her head thrown into the air as she felt things she had never felt before.

Y/n started feeling like his climax was coming soon, the boiling sensation in his core greeting him as he watched Momo's breast bounce around while she jumped up and down on him, impaling herself with his dick.

"Momo I'm close."

"Alright pull out, I want it on my face"

He pulled out of her, Momo going onto her knees while sticking her tongue out, her fingers playing with her pussy and nipples as Y/n stroked his cock, the visual imagery becoming too much as he soon erupted in a geyser of hot, white, thick and sticky semen that covered Momo's entire face.

Y/n fell back onto the bed as Momo scooped the cum up with her fingers and put it in her mouth. She walked, or rather wobbled, around before grabbing a towel and cleaning her face. She then, too, fell back into the bed and almost immediately fell asleep after cuddling with Y/n.

--------------------------

The next morning Y/n woke up relatively early, stretching his arms before realising that he was alone in bed. He looked towards the table in the centre of the room and found a note.

"Hey handsome,

this is Momo. Thank you for giving me the best night of my life. Unfortunately, I had schedules so I left early, but I would love to see you again. I left you my number at the bottom of the page and I hope to hear from you soon.

P.S. I will speak to JYP about hiring your fine ass for a photoshoot for TWICE.

take care, tiger

love, Momo xoxo"

Y/n smiled to himself before pocketing the note and walking downstairs, finding Jongin passed out on a coach surrounded by other drunk idols. He picked Jongins phone up and called for the manager to get him.

"I swear he will be the death of me"

#kpop fanfic #kpop imagines #kpop smut #kpopfap #idol x male reader #kpop x male reader #x male reader #male reader #twice smut #twice momo #momo x reader

[slugtranslation-hypmic]

I Think Hypmic's Portrayal of Gender Roles is Kinda Refreshing: An Essay A.K.A. I'm Procrastinating on a Weekend Deadline :)

Hypmic's talking points on gender are hamfisted, corny, and melodramatic. "Maybe...we shouldn't have a wage gap," is not the hottest of takes. However, like most things in Hypmic, the writers have a lot more to say about gender and gender roles in the framing of the story itself that's much more nuanced. And honestly? It's kinda refreshing.

It's also something that went way over my head when I first became a Hypmic fan. Sure, I read manga and played Japanese video games--usually translated into English first--but I didn't have enough exposure to hundreds or thousands of pieces of untranslated Japanese media. I'm going to guess that most Hypmic fans don't either, which is totally fine and normal. We all exist within our respective cultural communities wherein we're bombarded with messages constantly telling us how to act, think, and speak. We tend to absorb these messages on subconscious levels and reflect them in the art we create and stories we tell, either by reinforcing them or challenging them. Thus, our stories don't exist in a vacuum, and divorcing stories from their cultural backgrounds can suggest the artist is the original thinker of a larger concept or hide their specific point of criticism. That is, if I wrote a story about a man who chooses to not catch fish, drink beer, and drive a Dodge Ram pick-up truck, we should be aware that I'm not the person who conceptualized the stereotype of dudes who catch fish, drink beer, and drive pick-ups. I wouldn't deserve the credit for dreaming up that exact image, and at the same time, it would be incorrect to read that as me targeting those three things randomly. The choice to not drive a Dodge Ram pick-up is not a commentary on Fiat Chrysler Automobiles. It's a stand-in for the notion of masculinity.

Thing is, we're hit with messages about masculinity, femininity, and other gender-related concepts on a daily basis. No matter where you live or what language you speak, every person on Earth is inundated with messages saying, "This is what you are, and consequently, this is how you should act." Our relation to these messages is complicated, and this complexity is compounded by different cultural communities preaching different messages in their stories, marketing, and human interactions. For instance, the US's massive global cultural influence means that those outside the US can still easily recognize what I mean by catching fish, drinking beer, and driving enormous American pick-up trucks. But the location and cultural differences may add or subtract nuances. A person living in, say, Munich is unlikely to have Dodge pick-ups advertised to them the way a person in rural Texas would. Our fictional Munich person does not feel the same social pressures to buy a Dodge and represent their masculinity with a Dodge the way our imaginary Texan would. In turn, the Munich person likely sees a Dodge with an element of absurdity--who the hell needs such a big truck in a European city?--and foreign Americanness. The Texan wouldn't have that concern--why worry about navigating your enormous truck down narrow streets when you live in the countryside?--and sees Americanness as their local default, thus removing any element of foreignness.

That is to say, gendered messages aimed at people (especially women) who live in Japan don't affect me the same way as they impact those who do live in Japan. Like, it's not my dog in the fight, and there are plenty of people who are directly affected who write their own stories and commentaries on gender roles in Japan. Japanese women don't need a random guy in the US to stand up and say, "Damn, your gender roles are fucked!" 1) They already know. 2) They're already saying it. So I come at this from an angle of someone who already has deep, primary frustration with the gendered messaging in my culture and secondary frustrations when similar messages appear in other cultures. I don't have a bone to pick with Japanese media in particular. Plain and simple, reading and working on hundreds of pieces of Japanese media is what I do for a living. It's in my face constantly, and as a result, I am also perpetually bombarded by messages about gender roles in Japanese media.

It's not a hot take to say that Japanese media, like the media of every single other culture around the globe, has a lot to say about gender. There's a lot of slotting people into boxes and telling people what to do. It's chafing, as we see all across history in art produced in reaction to gender roles. In the past couple of decades, global shifts in gender roles have caused media to shift the messages they're pushing, but it's not controversial to say that Japan has lagged behind other countries like the US.

Many, many stories push arbitrary notions of how to be a girl or how to be a boy that don't necessarily come from the author themselves. The authors probably aren't even fully conscious that they're making these choices. If an author writes a story about a library and makes every female character a romance fan and every male character an action fan, it's likely a reflection of endless messaging that says action is for boys, romance is for girls. In turn, this story becomes yet another reinforcing message. If no fictional girls like action, and no fictional boys like romance, it becomes alienating for real girls and boys who don't follow these same rules. These rules are everywhere and have so much to say about gender that it's hard to know where to begin. Girls must like cute things. Boys can't like sweet food. Women must not express sexual desire. Men can't be shy. On and on and on.

Which is why, when there's a relative lack of this in Hypmic, it's kind of a breath of fresh air.

Wrong Ways to Be a Man

Actually, Hypmic does have a few moments where characters claim there are certain things men or women should do, but the writing always frames these messages as incorrect.

Take Samatoki, for instance. After Kuukou and Sasara leave MCD, Samatoki tells Ichirou, "Men shouldn't cry when they lose their friends. Men should only cry when they lose a family member."

(TDD chapter 10)

This line usually appears via Ichirou's perspective. In the stage play, it's told during a song Ichirou narrates, and as shown above in panel 3, the manga frames the line from the angle at which Ichirou sees it. In such moments, the audience is meant to read this as a cool line from a strong mentor figure to Ichirou. That's how Ichirou sees it, and he's a seventeen-year-old with too much on his shoulders who idolizes Samatoki. He is incapable of seeing how much pain Samatoki struggles with.

However, when the manga focuses on more intimate moments of Samatoki's life, we see that Samatoki does struggle quite a lot.

(BB/MTC+ chapter 6)

This isn't a cool, attractive figure meant to be idolized. While Samatoki's cigarette usage and aggressiveness are often framed as sexy or enticing, the juxtaposition with dirty laundry, overflowing ashtrays, and empty bottles make him a sympathetic and struggling figure. Therefore, we should understand that his notion that men don't cry is flawed. It's a means to distract himself from emotions he doesn't want to feel.

Later, as Samatoki begins to process his emotions and open up to his teammates, the unhealthy coping mechanisms recede. Samatoki is more confident, mature, and happier as a result of being more emotionally vulnerable.

We see a similar transformation with Kuukou. As a teen, Kuukou is reluctant to accept help or truly let anyone in. In a conversation with Hitoya, he says (and I am still completely unable to take this seriously), "A man's got to wipe his own ass."

(DH/BAT chapter 4)

However, over the course of his character arc, Kuukou learns that he cannot exist as a good leader or individual without the teamwork of his newfound "family." Only rejecting this classical and toxic notion of masculinity brings Kuukou joy.

In fact, most of the first-line characters have very similar arcs. At the start of the story, Ichirou is insistent on doing everything himself. He has to learn to be able to rely on other people (Kuukou, Samatoki, Ichirou and Jirou) to be happier and unlock his true strength. See below, his final attack and Ability use in the 2nd DRB, which is only possible when his brothers figuratively and literally support him through it.

(BB/MTC+ chapter 25)

Sasara struggles with emotional honesty and trust in favor of using humor to gloss over discomfort. It takes multiple heart-to-hearts with Roshou before he can let humor take a backseat and say how he really feels. Ramuda has difficulty trusting other people and being honest with his emotions when faced with stressful scenarios. Only through Fling Posse is he able to open up and ask for help instead of driving people away when the problems are too big for him to face alone. Jakurai struggles to connect with other people, work through and acknowledge his complicated feelings, and not place himself on a pedestal. Through Matenrou, Jakurai is able to ask for help, be more open, and ultimately be less hard on himself.

The second- and third-line characters follow similar arcs, and this repetition creates a core message for Hypmic: Trust and rely other people. Be open with your feelings. There's a wrong way to be a man, and that's to hurt yourself and other people.

Right Ways to Be a Man...Are Infinite!

But with that being said, there is a surprising lack of commentary on how else to be a man. Hypmic as a whole doesn't do much to constrain the male characters in terms of gender roles.

Sure, some characters do fit into more traditionally masculine roles--Ichirou, Samatoki, Riou, etc. The messaging makes it clear that it isn't wrong to play into masculinity provided it doesn't become toxic. (See above.)

Even then, however, these especially masculine characters are associated with less masculine traits that are either portrayed positively or not portrayed as a joke. Riou is an avid cook, but the joke is never that he wears an apron and knows his way around an outdoor kitchen (tee-hee, men don't cook!). It's that he cooks with horrifying ingredients. Samatoki is a fashionista, but the joke is framed as a counterpart to Ichirou's nerdiness.

(DoD chapter 1)

Here, it's funny that neither of them can shut up (the ペラペラ/blah blah SFX, the long bubbles filled with lots of text that's cut to indicate they kept going for longer), but the object of their attention--a model toy and a pair of jeans--are treated in the same neutral light. It's very common for stories to touch on, even defensively, the social taboo of men being into clothes. Hypmic doesn't even acknowledge that such a taboo could exist.

This is subtle but extraordinarily effective in giving characters the same consideration and weight. The more feminine characters are always treated just as sincerely (or, if there's a joke to be made, irreverently) as the more masculine characters. Take Ramuda, for instance. In Japanese media, a love of sweets is often characterized as feminine and will often be remarked upon, even in LGBT+ media, as atypical for men. Again, there's zero acknowledgement of such a thing in Hypmic. Whenever other characters talk about Ramuda's food intake, it's always framed as a concern about the lack of nutrition.

(FP/M chapter 11... I don't have the source lying around on my computer, so here's the old-ass scanlation lol)

It's also given the exact same weight as anyone else's junk food habits. Here, MCD goes out for burgers (a neutral to masculine-coded food due to the meat and high calorie count) while Ramuda opts to try a sugary Starbucks-esque drink. The parallelism in the comic's framing suggests that the two objects are functionally the same, and there is no comment that a sugary drink is feminine and therefore "inappropriate" for Ramuda. There's also no indication that MCD's preferences are in any way better. They simply happen to be the characters' personal preferences. The punchline is two groups splitting up, only to awkwardly run into each other again moments later.

(DoD volume 4 bonus comic)

Similarly, Ramuda's interest in clothes or fashion is never treated negatively--in fact, the discussions of clothes as a means to find identity and happiness make it a positive!

In ARB cards and promotional materials, Ramuda sometimes wears dresses. It's, again, portrayed in parallel to other characters wearing more masculine clothes and is never commented on as something "unusual." It's just who Ramuda is.

Hifumi is another interesting case. Like Ramuda, his playful personality often doesn't as stereotypically masculine. (To be clear, I read much of this as "gender neutral with a strong emphasis on youth" versus "feminine" in a way that I'm not sure has a good US equivalent...metrosexual/yuppie men's fashion, maybe? In the sense that it's a youth subculture that defies some masculine gender roles but is still focused mainly on men. I wish I was more well-versed in Japanese men's fashion and could give an exact term, but I'm what I'm thinking of is definitely an established thing--young, trendy dudes whose styles focus on poppiness vs. the rugged manly man or "idk, I'm just some guy" subcultures. It's a thing that pisses off old Japanese conservative men in the same fashion as people getting up in arms about "the gayz!!!1!" and their androgynous clothing lol.) Their personalities are often the butt of jokes, but only in the same way that Dice or Doppo are--that is, that they're exaggerated and over the top. There's no commentary on masculinity or lack thereof.

There are also moments when Hifumi, Gentarou, or other characters play feminine characters in roleplay moments, which is usually (but not always) not the sole joke. The audience is supposed to find it funny, but the humor is almost always centered on the absurdity of the scene as a whole. For instance, in a moment where Hifumi and Doppo are pretending to be two drunk karaoke-goers, the humor comes from the composite set-up of Hifumi's hair twirl, Doppo's untucked shirt and tie, Doppo and Hifumi's exaggeratedly flirtatious poses, the spotlights and sparkles, and the same font as used on classic karaoke machines.

(FP/M+ September 2022 oneshot)

Hifumi and Doppo do not perform traditional gender roles in their homelife, and while it's easy to see and often commented on in the English-speaking fanbase when it comes to Hifumi, I find it just as prevalent on Doppo. It's true that Hifumi is taking a feminine role by doing the majority of the household's cooking and cleaning, but if we were to assume Doppo has the masculine role in the household, he would have the breadwinner duty. However, he isn't the main source of income for their household, and he's just as unassertive in finding a (female) romantic partner as Hifumi is. Japanese men are bombarded with media messages stressing the importance of taking an active role in career and romance. That Doppo does not would, in many stories, make him the butt of a joke for not living up to masculine gender roles. But he isn't; instead, Hypmic portrays him as a sympathetic character. It's tough, Hypmic says, for people to get good jobs and maintain friendships/relationships as an adult.

Similarly, it's noteworthy that Hifumi's self-appointed term "Gigolo" is consistently portrayed as a good thing in Hypmic. The meaning of the English term aside, the Japanese word ジゴロ (jigoro) is almost always used as an insult for a man who is financially dependent on one or multiple women. In the strictest sense of the term, Hifumi is a jigoro in that his income derives from his female clients. However, there is never any shame associated with that, and as a whole, Hifumi's career as a host is shown to be a positive thing. I can't express enough how rare that is in any sort of semi-serious media. Certainly, Hypmic acknowledges that his job requires too much drinking (Doppo's verse in Hoodstar), but the overall portrayal is overwhelmingly positive. Hifumi and his coworkers are never treated as uneducated, boorish, or pathetic for "failing" to find other work that does not require flirting with and entertaining women. (This is partially due to the overlapping judgment with sex work.)

All the various harmless preferences and personality traits of the male characters are treated equally with no judgement over what's masculine or non-masculine. Within the broader context of Japanese media, this absence of judgment stands out and reinforces one of Hypmic's core themes: Differences make us better, not worse. In the end, Hypmic suggests, there's no one right way to be a man.

Right Ways to Be a Woman...Are Just as Infinite!

But what about women? This series is, after all, marketed mainly towards women, and while female audience members can no doubt extrapolate the lessons learned from the male characters, it's worth taking a look at the female characters too.

The female characters do receive much less screen time than the men and are not the focus in the series; I'd argue that's less an issue of overt sexism and more that they fall out of focus in the story the writers want to tell. (There's a broader discussion to be had about inherent sexism in the writers' focus which goes hand-in-hand with rap industries across the globe favoring men and rap being an example of exaggerated masculinity, but that's a topic for another day.)

Even so, the framing of the female characters is interesting in a couple key respects. The individual character arcs and motivations of the main female characters are, in my opinion, some of the weakest parts of Hypmic--many times, Otome and Ichijiku do things because the plot demands them to, making them look incompetent or needlessly cruel for characters we're supposed to sympathize with. Nemu's story seems to be handled with more care and takes an interesting twist, wherein she openly acknowledges that she's disenfranchised as a woman in modern Japan but rejects the notion that she needs to find strength on either Ichirou or Samatoki's (male) terms. By choosing to be strong in "her own way" (whatever that means...it's not well-defined), the authors are using Nemu to reject the notion that strength and power are inherently masculine.

What I find to be far more interesting is the character design for the Chuuouku women, both in what is said and what is not said.

To begin with, the characters and their portrayals run the gambit from highly sexualized to completely non-sexual. Some characters (especially Ichijku and Honobono) have conventionally attractive, curvy body types and are often drawn in ways that highlight their bodies.

(FP/M+ chapter 4)

(FP/M+ chapter 14)

In some cases, especially Honobono's, the enticing nature of the illustrations is framed as the character's choice; in the above, her words indicate that she wants to seduce the off-screen listeners. The images included above are largely representative of these characters' raps, regardless of illustrator.

But on the flip side, other characters with large breasts or hips are never drawn in a sexual fashion. By way of comparison, here are two shots of Nemu rapping.

(BB/MTC+ chapter 12)

Even in shots with dynamic poses, no attention is drawn to Nemu's figure in any sort of provocative sense. Nemu touches her chest, drawing the reader's eye there, but the artist does not emphasize the size of her chest--they're allowing a chest touch to be no more than an emphasis of the self. At the same time, Nemu's body isn't downplayed. We can see in panel 2 on page 2 that Nemu has a small waist and wider hips, but once again, she isn't being sexualized. The action lines draw the reader's eye to Samatoki and thus put the action first and foremost. This creates the idea that not only can characters portray themselves sexually, but they can just as easily choose not to.

We see similar with Otome, who does not wear any sort of revealing clothing and is never shown in a sexual fashion. However, Hypmic doesn't equate revealing clothing to sexual portrayals either! While I wouldn't call Tsumabira's outfit revealing, she does have more visible cleavage than most Chuuouku figures. However, her bare chest is never sexualized like Ichijiku's.

(BB/MTC+ chapter 4)

Compare the non-emphasis on the chest and the power stance to any of the many shots of Ichijuku where her breasts are front and center in the camera. Speaking of power stance, Tsumabira remains confident in her power stance without being sexy--that is, no stepping on the camera and showing her whole leg.

Which isn't to say that Tsumabira is a sexless character. She's drawn visibly turned on by the male characters in such a way that is cartoonish but not, in turn, overly sexual. Were this supposed to be titillating to the reader, I would have expected to see a larger close-up on her face and tongue. However, the artist (who is no stranger to focusing on tongues!) devotes the majority of the panel to Tsumabira's body language (which, again, doesn't absurdly exaggerate any of her proportions or focus on her chest) and covers part of the mouth with text bubbles. Tsumabira is drawn as engaging in sexual behavior without being sexualized for reader entertainment.

(FP/M+ chapter 4)

The juxtaposition of such different views with little to no judgement attached to any of them suggests that it's perfectly okay to want to be sexy or not, to wear revealing clothing or not, to be involved in sexual situations without being the object of sexual interest, or to simply exist with an attractive body type without sex ever coming into the equation. Just as some characters choose to tie bodies to sexiness, some don't whatsoever--and either is perfectly fine!

The former idea ("I can choose to be sexy") may not sound especially revolutionary to US audiences, where sexuality is thrust upon women willingly or otherwise, but I find it fascinating because it lets the main characters embrace this idea without associated slut shaming. So much of Japanese media insists that women should be sexy but are also wrong for wanting to indulge in their own sexuality. Therefore, having characters who run virtually every iteration of take on the topic (I want to engage in sexuality and be sexualized, I want to engage in sexuality without being sexualized, I don't want to engage in either) with multiple body types (ie, Tsumabira isn't automatically not sexualized because she has a smaller chest; Nemu isn't automatically sexualized because she has a bigger chest) and no judgement involved feels like another breath of fresh air to me.

As a whole, I find the diversity of the Chuuouku uniforms and character appearances quite interesting. They're undeniably all feminine and relatively militaristic, but different characters wear entirely different wardrobes. Skirts vs pants, blouses vs dresses, high heels vs boots... Since every character has her own take on the common theme, it once again feeds into the idea that each character is her own individual and perfectly valid for defining femininity in her own way.

Haircuts, too, range from longer and more feminine hairstyles to pixie cut-esque looks.

(BB/MTC+ chapter 16)

Again, nothing of the framing suggests this short-haired woman is in any way different from her longer-haired counterparts on the edges of this screenshot.

Finally, while most Chuuouku women are conventionally attractive, I find it extremely compelling that Haebaru is a stereotype of an unattractive Japanese woman. To be extremely clear, I do not think these stereotypes should have weight, but the combination of chubby and/or muscular build, freckles, rounded nose, and non-glossy hair is often used as a visual shorthand for unattractive or otherwise undesirable women.

Sure, it's not fantastic that Haebaru is a scheming, two-bit villain. However, so is virtually every other female character in the series, and in particular, Haebaru is (the conventionally attractive) Tsumabira's counterpart. Both are treated with the same respect or lack thereof, suggesting that one's appearance has nothing to do with your ability to be a no-good baddie. Ha ha ha.

It would be lovely if the female characters were fleshed out further and given intelligent choices and diversity outside of the realms of physical appearance. However, I do think the writers' choices are limited by virtue of all women automatically being antagonistic side characters (which, again, is another discussion altogether). What the writers can and have accomplished is further reinforcing a celebration of differences. Just as there's no one right way to be a man, there's an infinite number of ways to be a scheming snake of a woman HAHA.

Intersection with LGBT+ Topics

Unfortunately, this is a very binary look at gender and gender roles, which, while largely representative of the current state of Japanese media, can be disappointing.

Hypmic appears to want to steer shy of LGBT+ topics as a whole, which is a bit of a shame. In a story so focused on gender and acceptance of diversity, it seems the natural next step to explore the notion of those who experiences don't align with a strict gender binary. Such stories are growing in popularity in Japanese media but have yet to be anywhere near the mainstream acceptance in US media (which is still in a fledgling stage at best). I would imagine Hypmic's writers are unable or unwilling to take a definite stance on these topics in the work due to fears of financial or career backlash. If nothing else, the sexuality of the main characters needs to remain in a limbo in order to have plausible deniability for both self-shipping and shipping with other characters. (Some deniability may be more plausible than others.)

The few instances in which Hypmic does wander into this territory are usually clumsy. I am no fan of the handful of scenes where male/male attraction is supposed to be funny purely by virtue of being male/male.

The inclusion of Urumi, the one minor character explicitly LGBT+, is not stellar either. I am hesitant to apply any definite label to her, as the real-life people her stereotype portrays self-identify as everything from trans women to cis men--or refuse to use these English labels at all! Still, we know from her profession (proprietor of a bar heavily implied to be a gay bar by the neighborhood it's in), appearance (poofy permed hair, exaggerated make-up), and demeanor (feminine speech style, a bit flirtatious) that she's AMAB and choosing to present herself in a feminine fashion. By writing Jirou to ask, "Aren't you a man?" in an exasperated fashion, the writers have put her gender presentation in a boke role--suggesting she's over-the-top, exaggerated, comedic. It's not great. I completely understand why readers find it offensive (and it is) even while I don't think the writers intended it that way. Ultimately, it would have been great to see other explicitly LGBT+ characters portrayed without the joking angle.

With that said, I'm not entirely unhappy with her character. She is a stereotype, but the authors have chosen to take only the visual elements of the stereotype and leave the rest on the cutting room floor. In other works of fiction, characters like Urumi are often hypersexual to the point of being in-universe creepy, especially towards underage boys. Other times, characters like her may be eccentric or off-putting in other ways. However, that's not at all the case here. Urumi seems to play a helpful big sister/aunt role in Jirou's life, and he's clearly comfortable enough with her to spend the night at her bar.

(BB/MTC+ chapter 17. "Sorry, but can I shack up here again tonight?" "Of course you can.")

While she seems to engage in some sort of a bohemian lifestyle, as evidenced by the alcohol and smoking, it isn't anything outside of what many of the other characters do. Additionally, while she isn't drawn in a flattering fashion in scenes where she's playing up her persona (which is par for the course with any character in this series, regardless of gender), there are plenty of neutral shots of her being serious. Finally, the art is never outright rude--that is, she isn't drawn exaggeratedly masculine or flamboyantly...snakey? I don't know how to describe this to anyone who's lucky enough to have never seen this--clearly LGBT+ AMAB characters drawn with noodly limbs and huge, overblown lips winding around male characters.

Maybe because I see so much worse continuing to be produced in this day and age, I feel like Hypmic could have done a much, much worse job with this character. She overall plays a positive role and is treated with much the same care as other side characters. It's unfortunate, then, that the writers have chosen to make her gender presentation the subject of a joke.

In other frustrations, I heavily dislike the unnecessary gender divide in background characters. All punks and other background baddies are male, whereas all adoring fans are female. (But Rhyme Anima has done an interesting job of subverting this!) The vast majority of other background figures fall into strict gender roles, which is likewise disappointing. It appears that diversity may be an accepted trait for none but a lucky few that form the main Hypmic cast.

All in all, I don't think Hypmic's portrayal of gender roles is groundbreaking, nor do I think it's fair to suggest that all Japanese pop culture plays into strict gender roles. There are certainly many Japanese works, popular or otherwise, with much more interesting things to say about gender. However, when compared to the vast majority of the titles that cross my desk on a regular basis, I notice and appreciate the level of care put in to Hypmic's commentary on gender roles. The work consistently reinforces the notion that it's okay to be your own individual, no matter how that plays into your gender, and I find that freeing. That's a message we could all do to hear more often, regardless of culture and language.

TL;DR: Oh no, my rapidly approaching deadline. :)

#not a translation #analysis asks

[st-el-la-luna]

Thinking about being a civilian in Las Almas when shit goes down

You'd been invited to stay with a friend and, being in desperate need of a vacation, you'd agreed. It was fun, staying with them, meeting their family, learning about their hometown and childhood.

The fun ended pretty quick when these cunts dressed in black started killing everyone.

You and your friend had been out enjoying the night, eating, drinking, dancing. You were on your way back to their house when you heard it.

A gunshot.

Your friend tells you this isn't entirely abnormal. Tells you to ignore it and keep walking.

So you do.

But the gunshots are becoming more frequent. Louder too. They're getting closer.

A woman you vaguely recognize, one of your friends neighbours, rushes out of an alleyway, terrified and bloodied.

You can only understand so much about what's said before her head suddenly... Not there. Bits of skull and brain and blood spattered all over you as you watch her body drop.

You turn to your friend. "This is normal? Dude...."

You're friend tells you to shut the fuck up and that you need to run. As the sound of heavy footsteps and voices (American accents you register) get closer, accompanied by the sound of a gun being reloaded, you agree.

The two of you make a run for your friends house, passing all sorts of horrible sights. You're a block away when a gunshot rips through the night and your friend suddenly just... Stops.

You look back in disbelief. Their eyes wide with shock, lips parted, slack jawed... The new hole in the middle of their forehead. They try to say something to you, but all that escapes them is a choked groan. They throw you their keys, then collapse.

They're not dead yet. You can tell by their sounds and the rise and fall of their chest. A part of you wants to help them, grab them and drag them off to safety.

The other part of you recognizes the man dressed in all black (he looks suspiciously military but that doesn't make sense, killing civilians is a war crime... isn't it?), who's walking closer as he reloads his gun.

So you run.

Run and run until your legs are burning. Taking back roads and side streets, jumping fences, the adrenaline making it easy to ignore the way the barbed wire tears at your skin.

When you make it to your friends street, you find the door to their house is already open. Kicked down.

You find the dead inside.

A part of you wants to stop here, curl up and break down. The other knows that these people, these men in black, could come back at any moment. And so you do what you can to prepare yourself.

You empty your backpack of your belongings, filling it instead with anything you find around the house that might be useful.

A first aid kit buckled to the side. Rubbing alcohol and tequilla and whatever else flammable you can find poured into glass bottles, the lips stuffed with socks. Kitchen knives. Fire crackers and fire works. A couple flares. You manage to break open the safe and get a gun. An eight round revolver that you have no clue how to shoot but figure, hey, its better than nothing. At the very least, you could use it for intimidation.

You're heading to the garage where you're pretty sure you remember seeing a bow and full quiver of arrows (you were obsessed with the hunger games when you were younger, actually got pretty good with the weapon) when you freeze.

The man in black also freezes.

He's bloody and out of breath. Face smeared with dirt and oil. His mohawk disheveled. His blue eyes land on you laser focused. He's got a gun. A big one.

And he's looting the corpses. Your friends roommates, their bodies still warm as blood pools beneath them, some of their eyes still open, casting judgmental stares, lay there limp. And this fucker is acting like this is a D&D campaign.

You've got the revolver trained on him with shaking hands.

He points his gun (some sort of automatic things) at you. His hands are steady, practiced. His eyes sharp.

He opens his mouth to speak and takes a half step towards you.

You pull the trigger.

Nothing happens.

"Aye," the man speaks in a thick Scottish brogue. He sounds like he's laughing. How dare he laugh? If you could figure out how the stupid gun works you'd shoot him. "You've got to cock a gun like that 'fore you shoot it."

You freeze, your arm drawn back ready to throw the revolver at the man. His accent gives you pause. The other men in black, they were Americans. And this guy... His clothes are a bit different too. Though he's clearly also army.

You lower your arm hesitantly. "You're... You're not one of them."

"The Shadows?" he asks. "Tch, no. You'd best thank your lucky stars for that, they'd have killed you in a second flat."

"What the hell is going on here?" You demand, slipping the gun back into the makeshift holster you had made out of a couple belts. You step around the man to the garage and he follows.

"You're not from here, are ya love?" he asks as he watches you scan the shelves.

"I'm here on vacation," you say bitterly as you stand on your toes, struggling to reach the quiver of arrows. He pulls it down and hands it to you. The arrows are dusty and old, though still sharp. He hands the bow to you as well, albeit unstrung, and you let out a quiet hum in thanks. He watches as you string the bow, a brow raised. He looks like he's going to say something, but you cut him off. "You didn't answer my question... What's happening? Who are those people?"

He hesitates a moment, you notice his ear piece. Someone else is speaking to him. "Aye, i know, I know, but I cannae very well leave her here now can I?"

At the mention of being left, you panic. There's a pair of handcuffs on his belt. You grab them and before he has a chance to react, you've cuffed your hands together.

And swallowed the key.

Yeah... Not your brightest moment.

The man looks at you dumbfounded. Then speaks to the man in his ear. "Uh... Lt? Got a bit of a problem..."

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Masterlist

#call of duty #cod mwii #john soap mactavish #soap #soap x reader #soap mw2 #las almas #x reader